#and my personal favorite i heard while i was sitting there crying over my mouse dying was 'im so sick of this seriously this is my third
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swagging-back-to · 5 days ago
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the way literally every fucking person has been REPULSIVE about euthanasia lately.
#they just crawl out of the woodwork#'oh spiralingbackto is grieving? time to get all the way on my bullshit and make her life literally horrible'#i cant count on one hand the maount of people who have sneered and said gross when i said im putting my mouse down.#i cant count how many people told me to just give them rat poison; to drown them; or to give them antifreeze.#'im not trying to be rude but why not just give them rat poison' ok well youre being extremely fucking rude. shut your goddamn mouth.#'im not trying to be rude but have you considered giving your infant with pneumonia bleach? yknow.. just end it?' that's what you sound lik#i cant count how many people have laughed.#even at the fucking vets office i could hear through the door a bunch of vet techs go up and say 'oh ew! even looking at it is grossing me#out! oh my god is that a mouse! gross!'#and my personal favorite i heard while i was sitting there crying over my mouse dying was 'im so sick of this seriously this is my third#today. im so about to just say screw it and not taking anyone else in today. had two#euths before lunch and now this? im so over it'#while literally laughing.#which was incredible to know that was the people surrounding my mouse as she died.#those are the people she was with in her last minutes.#and then they handed her to me wrapped in a fucking puppy pad.#(im already looking into different exotic vets to go to next time bc im not going back there)#but it isnt even just about my mice because when i put my cat down suddenly#one of my roommates was saying such dsgusting things.#i dont even remmeber what exactly because it was too distressing#most ive gotten is a 'ohhh how sad' this entire time !! :)#or people telling me about how they put their animals down and how im being a burden by causing them to remember it#:)#it would be nice to have even a single person in my real life who gives half a shit about me
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andromedagarcia · 2 years ago
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wrote a little something for the wonderland AU, featuring the three siblings and @hinataxsunshine and @airi-of-hearts ♡ hope you guys like it!
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A curious friendship, that between a rabbit, a mouse, and a serpent.
The sun was setting, the sky looked wounded, the crimson color of spilled blood, like that which covered the white roses blossoming in the Red Queen's garden, yellow clouds like gold spreading on the horizon, as if a painter (Cass, maybe? But she had buried her tools for art with Soma's body. Her words being there's no point in creating anything when all love has died, Andro, you know all my creations come from the heart) had drawn them with their brush.
'So what you are saying is that...'
Andro's voice was interrupted by her younger sister, who started laughing out of nowhere. First, it was nothing but a chuckle, prolonged in time. Then, it was as if someone had just told her the best joke she had ever heard in her entire life. She held her belly with both hands, bent over, tears streaming down her face. Had she stopped crying, since he had died? Would she stop crying? The Mad Hatter was becoming madder every single day.
With a flick of her black wings she signaled Hércules to do something. The soldier obeyed, not only because she was his Commander, but also because she was the oldest of the siblings, the one that had raised them all. The reason why they were in this mess? Could she have avoided it? Doubts plagued her mind and spread like a cancer, but they were not of any help, so she set them apart.
'You want to join our flanks.' The air heavy with lavender, the King of Hearts' favorite flower. What once had been a shiny, lustrous, green garden, in which hedges were shaped into a million different animals, both big and small, fountains threw up glistening water into the air and a hundred types of flowers grew, now was an unkempt mess, one that Andrómeda did not recognize as home.
Her dark, snake-like eyes focused on the people in front of her. A white rabbit and a mouse. Her natural prey. She didn't wait for an answer, a long, sharpened claw leaving an ugly mark on the wood of the table she had, until then, been sitting behind. Now she stood up, circling it, as she liked her lips with a long, forked tongue.
'Wine?' She offered, while she considered their words. 'It's not poisoned, don't worry about that.' She made sure to add, because while Mira may have used those tactics, that was not the White Qu... Mad Hatter's style.
'I will.' Hércules quickly said, leaving his now weeping sister pulling her own curls, rocking back and forth, whispering he's coming, he's coming, he's coming and she'll come and kill us all and she'll come and cut our heads off and the first time nothing will happen, nor the second, nor the third, only I will faint and then on the fourth he will forget his name, was it the fourth, was it the fifth? A fifth one, a sixth one, a seventh one, an eighth one... He'll die then, I'll die with him, The White Queen will die and the Mad Hatter will be born, she'll be born in Bethlehem like the Sphynx of the Second Coming, she's here to stay, the Mad Hatter... But I'm wearing a veil, shouldn't I be the Mad Veil-er? Oh, no, I do wear a hat too, don't I?
Andro resisted the urge to grimace, or to yell at her brother. He would probably be drunkest person in the room in about an hour, making a fool of himself, consuming alcohol being his way of dealing with this whole mess. She was, however, tired of playing his mother. She walked back to Cass, who was sitting under a withering tree, with a white stained dress that reeked of death and looked the part, as well, the veil over her face, not dark enough to keep her from seeing her little sister's features.
'You're wearing a hat too, Cass. It's fine. No Sphynx is coming.'
'No, I'm the Sphynx. I only bring death and pain and death and pain and other things that start with d such as... death, and pain, and despair and doom, tears? DECEASE, DISSOLUTION, DEMISE, DESTRUCTION.' Her voice grew louder and louder, until Andro crouched by her side and placed a calming hand on her shoulder, silencing her instantly. She raised her head, big, bewitching, beautiful brown eyes looking at her, filled with tears. 'He's dead, isn't he?'
'He is.'
Bawling. Lamenting. Mourning. Sobbing.
The cycle starting, once again. How long now, until she forgot?
The Jabberwock stood up, stretching her menacing wings, looking at both rabbit and mouse and promising herself she wouldn't eat them, no matter what her instincts told her. Because she needed their help.
'Just tell me there's a possibility of bringing her back.'
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sakurachan7734 · 2 months ago
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Back into the nightmare
Chapter 4: letting go is hard 
Sally then proceeds to shoot Zachary until she runs out of bullets but the bullets didn’t effect him very good
Zachary: you think that your little lead pebbles will get rid of me?! it’s gonna take a lot lot more
Sally starts running through the basement losing her hat and her hair coming down in the process she couldn’t go anywhere even if she tried to He was going to kill her he would not rest until she and her aunt were gone at some point she even thought of giving up and just letting him kill her 
Sally pov
I’m trying not to sob right now but there is nowhere else to go I have nowhere to hide I might as well just give up and let him have me I’m praying that I live the only reason why he is hunting me because he wants me dead and I can’t let go of them I don’t want to it’s hard to let go especially as it happened when I needed them the most
Sally feels a ghost like hand on hers she looks up and sees her father
Sally:*sobbing quietly* I will be with you soon
Zach: Sally i know you want to give up but you have come this far don’t give up so easily you have been through your worst nightmare you are so close to coming back up even stronger then when you entered
Sally: but I know he is here because I can’t let you and mum go
Zach: my dear little mouse eventually you will eventually be at peace with yourself and the only way to do that is by letting go of me and mum but just because you let go does not mean you’re gonna forget us
Sally: I….I know but I don’t have anything to remember you by besides a few pictures and these memories
Zach: well like I said just because you’re letting us go does not mean you’re forgetting us *hugs sally* my dear little mouse i’m gonna give you one piece of advice to help you get rid of your uncle once and for all
Sally: What do I need to do?
Zach: well you have two choices just sit here and cry until he finds you and come join us in heaven and leave your friends and aunt alone or set this place on fire
Sally: the second option but why do I have to this place on fire? You know how much I love this place
Zach: well we died by fire and your mum wished that he experiences the same in the afterlife but since he’s after you that’s the only way to get rid of him 
Third person POV
Zach disappears and Sally wipes her tears and gets up walking through the almost knee deep water not caring that she’s getting wet. She had to find gasoline She already had a lighter in her bag in case her phone and flashlight died which both have already died for days ago but she had remembered that the synagogue would keep gasoline for the stove in the kitchen hopefully there were some there but while she was looking she tripped and fell into the water and got cut up and her nose broken because whatever she fell hard some sharp things on it but she brushed it off and kept looking
Sally pov
I hate having to hurt my own family members But at this point I don’t care he deserves it if he think he can get away with taking my mum and dad away from me and I don’t want to burn down this so special to me but if that’s the only way to get rid of him then I’ll do it if my mum wants him to experience what we did then god please forgive me for what I’m about to do
Third person POV
Sally finds the gasoline finds her way outside the pours out the whole container of gasoline around the synagogue and then throws the lit lighter and the whole synagogue went into flames, Sally burst out into tears because of her favorite place is now gone and what she heard from inside the building from her uncle
Zachary: YOU WERE A FUCKING DISGRACE YOU WERE A MISTAKE YOU LITTLE BRAT YOUR FATHER IS DISA-
Sally pov
I couldn’t hear what else he said because I passed out and when i woke up I was in a Daisy field and my parents grave stones were there to I ran over to the stones laid down and started crying begging for their forgiveness
Angelina and Zachary appear to comfort, Sally
Sally:*crying* I killed him! You can rest peacefully now
Angelina:*petting Sally on the head* you didn’t have to do that
Sally: b-but dad said that you wanted him to experience what you did
Angelina: yes I used to feel like that but now I don’t
Sally: but why did you write to me to come here?
Zach: well we know that you love this place and you wanted to come back but clearly it’s not what any of us remember
Sally:*starts crying again* yes it isn’t what I remembered
Angelina: now dear your father told me that you can’t let go of us because you have nothing to remember us is that right? 
Sally: yes everything in that house is gone and I don’t want to let go
Zach: we understand that it will be hard but one of the ways to at be peace with yourself is by letting us go that doesn’t mean you’re forgetting us I already told you this. 
Angelina: and we have a little gift for you once you wake up
Sally: really?
Zach: yes now we want you being very careful with it because what we gave you are very sentimental to us 
Sally: I will
Sally then wakes up in the hospital and she sees a big box next to her bed
Linda:*runs up and hugs sally* your alive!
Sally: yes I am
Linda: you said it only take a few hours, but you were gone for a week 
Sally: yea I ran into uncle Alex and he suggested I look in the hospital and the old synagogue 
Linda: oh by the way somebody left you a gift and I’m glad you’re back 
Sally: I saw that
Linda leaves the room and Sally be open the gift
Sally pov
When I opened the box and I saw a little clear box of my mums and dad’s jewelry and at the bottom was my mothers dress the one she would wear all the time I took out the dress and hugged it and started crying I swear on my life that I will keep the safe and not get them ruined
End of story 
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garrothromeave · 4 years ago
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mcd garroth + laurance headcanons for the sake of me posting something while working on my long-ass post, also happy birthday blaze ily, 
garroth - total momma’s boy. seems obvious, but it’s true -- back in o’khasis, he was practically glued to the side of zianna. whenever she had to leave for a few days when he was younger, he’d cry if he couldn’t go with her. when he left for the guard academy, he wrote to zianna on a daily basis. to put it simply, he had separation anxiety. the hardest thing about faking his death was not being able to see or talk to his mother. - incredible piano player. his father made him take lessons when he was younger for quite a few years, but he was naturally very good at it. he never mentions this skill to anyone. while they were at malachi’s castle and were looking for materials before they left, garroth stumbled upon an old piano and played something. he got really into it, and laurance ended up stumbling on him playing. he made laurance swear to never tell anyone about it. - when garroth was around eight or nine, his stutter was so bad that garte didn’t let him speak in public or around any people other than the family out of shame. vylad and zianna used to help garroth with his stutter.
- garroth is very sensitive to the saying “oh my irene.” growing up in the ro’meave house, it was taboo to use irene’s name in vein. or anywhere in o’khasis, really. nowadays he’s still very caustious whenever he says it, because he thinks that someone is going to yell at him. - horrified of getting hurt. back during the days of training in the guard academy, while he was very good with technique and fighting itself, he had a very bad flinching problem. overall, for the longest time, wounds and pain made garroth very uncomfortable. because of this fear of getting hurt, he has a bit of a stubble because of the one time he hurt himself while shaving.   - 6′4, because 6′11 is unbelievably tall and i honestly don’t even think that it’s canon? s’yeah. he seems 6′4 to me.
- garroth often sees new things and (internally) has this very child-like wonder response. he was sheltered for the entirety of his childhood and teenagehood. and after the guard academy, he stayed put in the same village for 5 years -- so he hasn’t experienced very much. he often wants to ask dozens of questions, but because of his shyness, he tends to just observe anything new very closely. which leads me to my next headcanon,
- because of o’khasis�� intolerance to many things, he was not very commonly exposed to magick’s users. the first magicks user that he directly met would be zoey, and he was very nervous when talking to her the first time he met her. when garroth gets to know her more, she catches on that he’s curious about a lot of things, and offers to tell him about things. he declines, and he regrets that decision to this day.
- as stated before, o’khasis isn’t very tolerable of things, which caused garroth to develop incredibly bad internalized homophobia. when aphmau comes along, he gets a very strong desire to protect her (little do we know, this strong desire comes from his connection with esmund) and confuses it for/tries to convince himself that it’s romantic love. it is in fact love, just platonic. so basically, this man’s gay as hell.
- garroth has more freckles than any other ro’meave family member. he’s mildly insecure about his freckles, seeing them as a ‘childish’ trait, which is why he wasn’t very bothered with the idea of hiding his face with his helmet. 
- his hair is super curly. it used to be more tame, but as he got older, it got more curly. it’s usually a mess because he doesn’t know how to take care of it, but it somehow looks hot as hell. (no homo ofc.)
- garroth is allergic to blueberries. 
- raven was garroth’s first genuine connection since he left o’khasis. zenix was his second. he loves raven a lot, and hates that he can’t see him as often as he’d like to.
- garroth is a total cat person. don’t get me wrong, he loves dogs, but if he were to choose between having one or the other, he’d choose to have a cat. he had a pet cat when he was little that he still thinks about a lot. (probably named sprinkles, just for the hell of it.)
- because of how he grew up, garroth’s actually a very picky eater. while he’d never admit it to himself or anyone else, he misses the more “rich-people” food he was spoiled with. 
- garroth isn’t actually that stupid, when he first arrived at pheonix drop, he had a name in mind that he wanted to go by (to better hide his identity). however, when his name was asked by someone, he panicked and “garroth” accidently slipped. he beat himself up for the longest time after that. the only reason he finally let go is because no one had ever pointed out how/seemed suspicious he had the same name as the deceased first-born son of o’khasis.
laurance - his hair grows decently quick, so even after cadenza cut it for him, it only took about 4 months for it to grow back just past his shoulders. he prefers it having some length to it anyways, and usually ties is back into a ponytail. after the irene dimension, he would let nekoette braid his hair. - has a very lanky body type. naturally has long limbs, and would often get called a ‘stick’ when he was younger. he’s about 5′11. but don’t confuse his thinner stature for weakness, he matches garroth’s strength easily.
- bi icon. fuck that “you were my first kiss” bullshit he gives aphmau, the list exists and while it’s stupid and weird, according to it, garroth was his first kiss. which is fuckin funny as hell if you think about it.
- laurance is very good with animals. more so rodents and smaller creatures, like squirrels, birds, rabbits, etc. cadenza was convinced that laurance could talk to animals for the longest time. he even had this little mouse that would pop in his house. however, on the contrary, larger animals -- not so much. he’s shit with horses and cows, especially. 
- incredible singer. has serenaded aphmau on multiple occasions, and has even gotten her to sing along with him from time to time. he sang for malachi to help him fall asleep every night since the day they met him. this caused him to start singing for levin at night as well. when laurance saw malachi again after the 15 year jump, within the first few days of his return, malachi asked for laurance to sing for him again just like he used to. which brings me to my next headacanon,
- laurance saw malachi as his own child, and treated him as such. they were very close, and malachi was the most heartbroken over laurance’s disappearance since he saw him very much as a father. it wasn’t that laurance favored malachi over levin that created this bond, it was the fact that laurance first-hand saw a child in need of a home and someone to love him, and it reminded him of when he was small. 
- he’s a sucker for bets. gambles, wages, anything like that. while he’s not directly a gambler, if someone offers he’s sure to accept. he’s a risk-taker, and ends up getting really into it. this also branches into his competitive behavior. he’ll be really upset and possibly a bit petty if he loses. why else do you think he still hadn’t given castor the 5 dollars he owes him?
- slingshot master. you give this motherfucker a slingshot he can kill someone with his impeccable aim. he’s also very good with a bow and arrow or any sort of projectile, but he’s the best with a slingshot. when he was younger, he hand-made slingshots from materials that he’d find around the forest.
- speaking of the forest, laurance is a very nature-loving soul. when he moved to meteli when he was adopted, he’d often go and explore the forests nearby. he and cadenza would use their imaginations and play all sorts of games. laurance and her especially loved to climb trees, and would jump from branch to branch. this helped laurance become very flexible. this is also how he met sasha, she was sitting in his favorite tree one day and they just hit it off from there.
- after he was rescued from the nether, laurance frequently had nightmares that would lead into sleep paralysis episodes. the first time it happened garroth had been looking over him (since this was around the time when laurance first got back and garroth had allowed aphmau to go do her lord tasks while he watched over him) and when he had the ability to move and speak again, he started freaking out. garroth had to calm him down and assure laurance that he’d talk to zoey about what happened. garroth and zoey are the only ones that know of laurance’s sleep paralysis, mainly because he didn’t want to worry aphmau or anyone else. zoey often gave him ways to cope with it. it didn’t happen every night, but it did occur at least 5-6 times a month. his sleep paralysis stopped the moment he entered the nether for the second time. 
- the first time laurance heard he’d made the list for the jury of nine, he felt honoured. when he was oblivious to how corrupt it was, he saw it as a huge opportunity. after learning about it’s true nature, he was still glad that he’d made the list -- because him being on the list prevented another person from risking being on the list and being chosen to be apart of the jury.
- yes, laurance can cook very will in this universe as well. it’s not that he was taught, it’s more that he can look at ingredients and just throw them together to make great combinations. zoey also taught him a few things.
- laurance does not know his real birthday. malachi does not remember his. since cadenza had “given” laurance a birthday, he offered to let malachi share his unofficial birthday with him. malachi accepted. 
garroth + laurance
- laurance began referring to garroth as “pretty boy” after seeing his face. he continued to call him that for the first month of their friendship. garroth hated it, and that’s the only reason laurance eventually stopped.
- laurance and garroth are both very good story tellers, but after one incident where garroth was telling levin and malachi a story, he started stumbling a bit over his words and couldn’t articulate correctly, so laurance picked it up and continued it. from there, they took turns with the story and occasionally interrupted one another to add a detail or plot point, and after that, malachi refused to listen to garroth or laurance separately when telling stories, because their collective minds came up with the most fascinating shit.
- garroth isn’t the best at coming up with insults because he’s simply too nice, but laurance loves to make fun of garroth (in good fun, of course). however, there is one thing that garroth could hold over laurance; and that was their height difference. whenever laurance would mess with him, garroth would just bring up height to piss laurance off. 
- when laurance regained his sight, him and garroth sparred very often. that’s when garroth realized how much strength laurance actually had, since he’d originally underestimated him. laurance, in all honesty, was equally surprised. their spars were pretty evenly matched.
- while these two are best friends, the amount of arguments they’ve had is insane. most of them were light-hearted and were more so disagreements, but sometimes things escalated and would result in yelling. that’s because laurance always took it a step too far. that, or garroth would try to disregard what they were talking about, which only made laurance more heated. but they’re both incredibly quick to forgive each other. once they had a really bad argument and didn’t talk for an entire hour afterwards, but once they saw each other again it was like they’d never fought. 
- since garroth grew up with everything and laurance often had to hunt and shit, garroth wasn’t amazing at it. laurance found out, originally teased garroth, but gave him tips and took him out and taught him how to hunt. garroth’s still shit at it when he does it alone, but when he does it with laurance he’s pretty decent. 
- garroth doesn’t drink. laurance does. laurance once tried to convince garroth to drink, but he refused -- which laurance respected, but garroth had to deal with drunk laurance for the rest of the night at the guard station. he learned things that he really wish he hadn’t that night. 
---
i had more for garroth and laurance’s relationship, but uh, i don’t really have time to write them down, so take these for now! i hope y’all enjoy them as much as i did writing them :]
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jadedxrealityw · 4 years ago
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-Amortentia- Blaise Zabini x Female Reader
   ☼-☪-☼
   Kody: BLAISEEEEEEE DADDY- im sorry. yeah yeah i’m changing the canonical storyline- cry about it. I’m also fully aware  Amortentia does not work like this lmao. 
   Request: you can make the summary short and less revealing for more fun hehe. Also it's totally up to you, dear! Only if you feel comfortable with it and no pressure! I hope you had a great weekend and drink more water ily <3 - 💐
   House: Hufflepuff
   Possible Triggers / Warnings: Slight slut shaming in the beginning, Draco being a little shit, 
   ☼-☪-☼
   you had been alone most of your life with your parents being on constant business trips from the ministry that would last for months on end. You were practically raised by your nanny, but she couldn’t teach you everything. You became socially awkward.
   you never had any friends back at home which meant you had no experience  communicating with people your age. You were walking awkwardness basically. It came at no surprise when you were sorted into Hufflepuff, even though both your parents were Slytherins- they weren’t disappointed in you though.
   you had just managed to scramble by through your first four years of school. Four long years without any friends, but you didn’t mind. You could get by just by yourself. You were a strong independent woman and knew how to get yourself out of sticky situations. 
   unless it was stuck up Hufflepuff’s- then you were screwed 
   one fine day in your fourth year you were heading to the quidditch field so you could go watch the game. Slytherin against Hufflepuff. They were both tied at two wins against each other so you were eager to see who would win. You wore a brown buttoned sweater with a nice pear of tan overalls. 
   the fallen leaves under your foot made a satisfying crack noise as you walked along the field. The cheers and other various sounds of students were definitely drawing nearer. You popped another flavour bean into your mouth when a harsh push came to your shoulder, causing the box of flavour beans to fall.
   you watched as they spilled out onto the grass with a look of solemn in your eyes “Dang- that was my last box” you mumble before a couple of snickers were heard in front of you. You look up to see three students wearing their regular Hufflepuff robes with there own casual clothes underneath.
   “Drop something?” one asked. A girl with light brown bobbed hair and green eyes spoke. You nod once “Uh yeah, just my flavour beans. I- uh i can just buy new ones” you spoke, already starting to clam up “Your a hufflepuff aren’t you? Why aren’t you wearing yellow?” the girl asked somewhat accusingly. 
   alert alert. Confrontation detected. Activate escape protocol 17B
   you didn’t answer and went to walk past them when another one of the three, a blond boy with blue eyes pushed you back to where you were standing. Shit. You fold your arms over your chest, looking at the ground “Your one of those Slytherin groupies are you, a house traitor?” the brown haired girl accused. 
   you opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. This made the two Hufflepuffs more annoyed “What? Cant speak? Let me guess, your like those Draco fangirls. Sweetie. Your def not pretty enough for him” she adds, making the boy aside her laugh. 
   did she just say def? Have you ever even talked to Draco Malfoy? Not the time to be thinking about that. “I uh-” before you could speak anymore the girl held up her hand “Don’t even try to defend yourself, Slut” you went wide eyed. No one has ever been so nasty to you.
   “I’ve never seen two Hufflepuffs go at one of their own, before” a girls laugh came from behind you. She had black shoulder length hair and bangs with brown eyes. Pansy Parkinson. In front of her was two boys dressed in Slytherin Quidditch uniforms. 
   You quickly identify the platinum blond boy with pale skin as Draco Malfoy. The hair was always a dead give away and the other boy was slightly taller then him with dark skin. He was very handsome for a boy your age. What was his name again? Oh! Blaise- Blaise Zabini. 
   “For Hufflepuff’s you two are quite nasty” Draco spoke, a grin playing on his lips. The boy Hufflepuff rolled his eyes “Yeah whatever Malfoy, what’re you going to do. Tell your father?” that struck a nerve in the young Malfoy as he went to lunge at them until Blaise put a arm out, blocking Draco.
   “Now, Now. Let’s not get physical. You see, me and my fellow housemates overheard your very deplorable conversation with this what seems like sweet girl. Honestly, how can you bully someone who can’t even get a word in?” Blaise spoke in such a proper way that you almost couldn’t tell he was insulting them.
   the girl and boy were silent as he spoke for a while until the girl spoke up once more “Oh so she’s one of your play things, Zabini?” she questions with a smug look. Blaise’s neutral expression switched into a disgusted one “I don’t have play things. I actually have respect for other woman”
   Blaise didn’t let them get another word in before he stepped in front of you “Are you alright? They didn’t hurt you did they?” he asked, using his hand to lift your chin and inspect your face. Touching- “No” you say in a meek voice. He nods once with a small smile “Good, now let’s go”
   you tilt your head sto side. Go? “Um- go where?” you ask. Blaise gestures towards the quidditch field “The game of course. Me and Malfoy here have to get ready and you and Pansy will meet Theo in the Slytherin bleachers to watch the game of course.” as he spoke, Pansy skipped to your side, linking arms.
   “Yeah! We can watch them make fools of themselves. Now lets go new friend!” Pansy said excitedly before practically dragged you towards the bleachers, leaving Draco and Blaise alone. The young Malfoy turned towards Blaise with a puzzled look “Since when did you involve yourself with Hufflepuffs?”
   Blaise rolled his eyes before walking off, not answering his housemate
    ☼-☪-☼
   7th year
   after that day you became part of Blaise’s friend group. He’d talk to you as much as he talked to Theo, Pans, or Draco. Ask you how your day was, invite you to sit with him at lunch and even sneak you into the Slytherin house at times. 
   some people found it strange. A slytherin spending so much time with a Hufflepuff, but as stated Blaise didn’t care much of opinions hat didn’t come from his friends, but all his friends adored you. Case closed. It was around the end of sixth year is when your feelings changed from platonic to romantic.
   you no longer saw him as your best friend that saved you from a bunch of nasty Hufflepuff’s all those years ago. You now saw him as someone you wanted to be with, all the time. To hold his hand, have him hold you, for him to just call you his. You fell hard. 
   but there was this fear, this fear that it would ruin everything you had with him. It was too great a risk, so like any normal person. You kept quiet as mouse and refused to let anyone know your feelings. Except for Pansy of course, but she found out on her own. Then told Draco, who told Theo.
   everyone knew except Blaise actually
   it was lunch and the Slytherins were waiting for you to arrive, Draco cleared his throat, getting the attention of the rest of them “I have a terribly good idea” he says, making Blaise look at him curiously “And that is?” he asked, leaning in to here what his housemate had to say. 
   Draco reaches into robe and pulls out a pink heart shaped bottle. “What in the hell? Why do you have a love potion?” Pansy asked with a amused chuckle. “Well- Y/n confessed to me that she had a crush on someone, but was too afraid to tell them. So i’m going to slip this into her drink to move her along”
   Pansy and Theo both look at each other knowingly. They know full well that little ferret was lying. Y/n told Pansy first. What was he playing at? “That is so wrong on so many levels, Malfoy” Blaise spoke up first, looking at him in distaste. 
   “Hey! She told me that she wished she was more confident so she could tell this person there feelings. I’m being a good friend!” Draco retorted, another lie. Blaise face drops a little “Who even is this person she’s confessing to. It better not be some low life Gryffindor” Blaise grumbles.
   Pansy’s eyebrow wiggles “Is that jealousy i here, Zabini?” she teases. Blaise rolls his eyes before looking back at his plate “Y/n can like whoever she want’s” he grumbles. “Really? ‘Cause your stabbing your steak” Pansy asked, leaning over across the table. 
   Blaise was indeed repeating jabbing at his food with his fork “I will use the slug-vomiting charm on you” he spoke, gritting his teeth. Pansy just smiled innocently “Cursing Pan’s i see” a voice came from behind him. Blaise turned his head around to see you, holding a textbook “Sorry i was late, got caught up”
   you take a seat next to Blaise, seeing a full plate and water put out for you “Thanks for saving me some food?” you say with a small smile. “I did actually, because i’m your favorite” Draco gives you a sweet smile, one that you laugh nervously at “Uh- sure?” you reply. 
       ☼-☪-☼
   once finished your food, you reached for the cup of water and took a sip. As you go and place it down you notice that they were all staring at you? “What?” you ask and Theo gives you a smile “Feel any different?” he asked. You purse your lips together and slowly shake your head “No, i feel alright”
   Draco huffs and places his head in his hand. You look over at Blaise who had went back to eating his food. You notice something on the corner of his mouth and grab the napkin on your table. Reaching up you wipe away the food on the corner of his mouth. 
   Blaise flinches and grabs your hand “What’re you doing?” he asked, gazing down at you. You snicker a bit at his reaction and gently tug your arm out of his grip “You had something on your mouth, didn’t want it to mess up your handsome face” you reply.
   Pansy chokes on her water, which turns into a coughing fit. Blaise stared at you blankly, just blinking mindlessly while Draco punched the air. 
    ☼-☪-☼
   now, mind you. A typical love potion last up to 24 hours, but Draco being the idiot he was accidently poured half the bottle into your drink. So it was safe to say it was going to last more than a day. “Your a bloody fool, Malfoy!” Blaise exclaims. 
   “I didn’t mean to pour half of it! Someone bumped into me!” Draco retorts while both Theo and Pansy eat a box of flavour beans they were sharing, just casually watching the chaos unfold. “That my be true, but you still served it to her! You took advantage of her vulnerability!” Blaise shouts back.
   Draco’s face fell, yeah could be a little prick sometimes, but he also cared about you deeply. He couldn’t tell Blaise he was your crush, but he could try to make it right. “I’ll make the antidote, but it will be a couple days” Blaise nods “Sorry for shouting” he says. Draco nods once before leaving the hallway.
   “Hey guys” jeez- you just snuck up on people. Blaise steps towards you “Shouldn’t you be heading to charms class?” he asked, crossing his arms “What? Do you have her schedule memorized?” Pansy questions with a small laugh. 
   Blaise exhales deeply “I have a copy of it actually. Anyway-” he says and turns his attention back to you. “What do you need?” he asks, his tone changing to a more calm one. “Can you walk me to class?” you ask. Blaise raises a brow “Why?” he asked, not that he would have a problem.
   “I want to spend more time with you” you spoke very nonchalantly. You almost wondered how you even spoke those words yourself. Blaise looks stunned for a moment, before a smile made a way to his face. This was just the potion talking, you were spewing nonsense he thought   “As do i? Let’s get going shall we”
   you smile brightly and grab his a=hand, interlocking your fingers. Blaise gives you a small nod before covering his mouth with his hands. Both Pansy and Theo watch them walk away “5 galleons Blaise confesses to Y/n by the end of this whole ordeal” Pansy points, chewing on a flavour bean. 
   Theo watched along her and nods “Your on, 10 galleons they both end up being friends again”
    ☼-☪-☼
   it has been TWO days and Draco still hasn’t made the antidote. He claimed it was because he had to gather all the supplies without Snape around, which was probably true. Blaise had started to kind of- sort of- maybe- like the attention you were giving him. 
   oh yeah- surprise! Blaise had had a crush on you even longer then you did, he just knew how to keep his composure around you. It was easy for him, but it didn’t make him any less terrified of what would happen if those feelings were revealed. 
   currently, you were both sitting in the courtyard, studying on a bench, your choice. “I think that’s enough for the day. I’m surprised you asked me for my help. You usually never ask me for any academic advice” Blaise spoke, knowing full well why she asked him. The love potion. 
   you look up at him, closing the textbook in your hands “Well, you and Draco are the smartest people i know, but i prefer your company more” you smile lightly as you begin to cram the textbook into your bag. Blaise feels his heartbeat pick up once again. 
   It’s just the love potion. It’s just the love potion. It’s just the love potion. Think rationally Zabini! “I’m glad to hear that” he nods once. You both stand up from the bench and the curiosity gets the better of him. “So, what people have you’ve been talking too the past couple days?”
   he wanted to know if you had actually been talking to your crush. So he could murder them talk to them man to man/woman. You shrug your shoulders “Just you guys, who else would i be talking to?” you spoke “Oh! i have an exam to take in potions! i’ll see you at dinner!”
   you spoke with haste before leaning up to kiss his cheek “Bye Blaise!” and with that you ran off towards the entrance. Blaise held up his hand for a moment before exhaling “She’s- been only- talking to us? Who the hell is her crush then?” he thought aloud before picking up his things and walking away.
   both Pansy and Theo pop up from behind the bushes “For a genius student, he sure is a idiot” Pansy spoke, eating the last bit of her cauldron cake. Theo nods “I thought Draco would be done with the antidote already?” he says. Pansy grinned evilly.
    “Yeah...he should, but i keep hiding the ingredients. Blaise needs more time to realize she’s into him” she spoke, wiping her mouth off. Theo gasps and wacks her shoulder “That’s cheating! and you ate my last cauldron cake!” he sighs, crossing his arms. 
    “Yeah? Cry about it Nott”  
    ☼-☪-☼
   “It’s done!” a loud shout came from the dorm hallways of the Slytherin house towards the common room. Draco came running towards them, panting like a dog. “What’s done?” Pansy asked, sitting next to Theo eating a bowl of popcorn. No- they don’t know where she got it either. 
   “The antidote for Y/n’s love potion. It took so long because i kept misplacing everything. All we need to do is sneak it into her drink at dinner tonight” he explains. Blaise shot up from the loveseat he was sat on reading a book and snatched the vile from Draco. “Hey! What the hell?!”
   “I’m not lying to Y/n anymore then i have to. I’ll catch up with you guys later” Blaise said before walking out the portrait door. “Alright that’s our cue!” Pansy and Theo stood up “What’re you guys doing?” Draco asked with a confused expression on his face. 
   “Spying on Blaise and Y/n to make sure they confess to each other” Theo explains, walking away with Pansy. Draco blinked a couple times before shaking his head “Guys that is such an invasion of there privacy and trust, they are our friends and we should be respectful......i’m coming with you”
   bestie things i guess
    ☼-☪-☼
   Blaise had just made it out the dungeons when he bumped into someone “Watch where your- oh Y/n. Why are you down here?” he asked. You chuckle and push away from him “I was going to see if Pansy wanted to have another sleepover, why are you out here? Dinner hasn’t started yet”
   Blaise thinks of his next words before holding up the vile “I need you to drink this Y/n”
   “What why?”
   “Just do it”
   “But-”
   “If you trust me you will. I would never harm you”
   “...Okay”
   you grab the vile from his hand and pop the cork off. You look at the vile then Blaise who nods once. Exhaling, you pour the strange liquid down your throat, twinging at the unfamiliar taste. You feel almost a swirl around your chest before you look at Blaise again “What was that?”
   Blaise places his hands on your shoulders, your face heating up slightly. Once again you were back being unnerved by this guy, but you didn’t notice “How do you feel about me Y/n?” he asked, making your E/c eyes widen a bit. “I’m sorry- come again?”
   he sighs deeply and looks you in the eye. Ooo eye contact, scary. “the same i did yesterday?” you say vaguely. because who the hell asks that kind of question. Blaise lets go of your shoulders and rubs his face with his his hands. He was frustrated. “Y/n, how do you feel about me?”
   you shrink at his gaze. The first thought that ran through your mind was that Pansy had snitched to him that you were in love with him “I’m so sorry- i didn’t want to tell you because i thought you would think i was weird!” you spurt out, confusing Blaise just a tad more. 
   “What are you talking about!?”
   “Pansy told you about my crush on you didn’t she!?”
   “Your what!?”
   oh if the world could swallow you whole now “Oh merlin- i thought that’s what she told you!” you shout before trying to activate escape protocol 17B again and walk away. Blaise almost thought about letting you leave but you liked him! he was terrified you didn’t! but you do! So, why would he let you leave!?
   he reaches back and grabs your arm, stopping you from walking any further “I get it. You don’t want to be friends anymore” you spoke sadly. Blaise stepped towards you, but you looked down at your feet instead of him “Your right, i don’t want to be friends anymore Y/n”
   you felt your heart shatter. That was until one of his long arms wrapped around your waist and other pointed your chin up to look at him “I want you to be mine and i, yours” he spoke, a slight grin on his lips. Say what now? did Blaise Zabini just confess to you?
   “Oh...”
   “Is that all you have to say to that? I just spilled my heart out to you”
   “What- what should i say?”
   “Yes?...No?”
   “Oh! yes- yes. Definitely yes! ”
   “That’s a relief. I thought i had just made a full of myself”
   “You are no fool Blaise Zabini”
   Blaise gave you a small smile before leaning down. Oh shit. He stops midway, lips centimeters from yours “It is okay if i kiss you, correct?” he asks. We love a consent king. You nod slowly, making his smile grow wide before he presses his lips to yours. 
   “5 galleons you little shit, hand it over!” you both pull apart as three idiots come falling out a nearby broom closet. Pansy spilled her popcorn all over the hallway floor in the process. “Screw you Pansy, you cheated you pig!” Theo snaps back, Pansy hitting the back of his head “I am no pig!” 
   Draco was just lying face first on the floor, hoping no one would notice his presence. “Oh right pug-face!” Theo smirks. Pansy gasps before pulling out her wand “You are dead you queer!” she shouts. Theo pulled out his wand as well “You have a girlfriend, homo!” he shouts. 
   Pansy sputters for a moment “That’s besides the point!” they both circle each other as Draco picks himself off the floor “I shouldn’t have come” he mumbles, dusting off his robes. Both you and Blaise look at each other before bursting into laughter. 
    ☼-☪-☼
   Taglist: @the--queen-of-hell @sonbelleame @dracosathenaeum @pxroxide-prinxcesss 
    ☼-☪-☼
   Kody- I have no words for this other then- what the fuck did i just write? Anyways, peace!
268 notes · View notes
nicka-nell · 4 years ago
Note
Heey ^__^ could I get Oikawa and Sakusa for your event? Oikawa angst to fluff with 17 and 58 so they have a fight and s/o dreams bad and he comforts his s/o? And Sakusa break-up to make-up with 6 and 21 and fluff at the end? Thank you and I hope your event goes well <3
Bad dream (Oikawa x reader) Break-up to make-up (Sakusa x reader)
Hi! I’m so so so sorry that I answer you so late! But I was busy with the move in my new house the whole time, and I had no time to write. :(( I hope that’s okay and that you’re not mad or angry or anything else.  So here we go! 
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Valentine’s Day - Prompt Event | Masterlist (coming soon)
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Pairing: Oikawa x reader (Bad dream) Warning: angst to fluff, mention of cheating  Prompts:  17. “Shh, it’s okay. It was just a dream.” 58. “I didn’t mean the things I said.”
Many people, handsome men and women in expensive suits and dresses. People laugh, talk about every new gossip, and you feel completely out of place with your simple dress. It is your favorite one, a dress you had bought for a wedding and now always wear on special occasions. It flatters your body, yet it’s a simple dress. One from a regular store, for a normal Price and not a brand dress, with crystals, beads sewn by hand or other elaborate stuff.
They invited Oikawa to a gala. One to which all successful people appear, but unfortunately you no longer know anyone. All have already gone home.
Intimidated you sit at the table, looking over at the cluster of women that had formed around a certain person. Your boyfriend. Oikawa always liked to be admired by everyone, so it’s no wonder that he feels comfortable with the women who would like to scratch out each other’s eyes just to get to Oikawa.
It offends you that he pays little attention to you today, only takes photos with all the other women. Oikawa avoids photos together with you and even forbade the photographer to photograph you. You wonder why he invited you in the first place, why he even wanted you with him if he didn’t want you by his side anyway.
One woman has been talking to him for a long time, exchanging loving looks, looks that Oikawa usually only throws at you. Or are you imagining all this in your current state? Whether or not you imagine it, you no longer want to look at them.
You know Oikawa isn’t paying any attention to you right now, get up without a word, and quietly find your way out, past the bodyguards standing at the entrance, as they point out to you that you won’t get back inside without an admission card. But you don’t even want that.
With a big lump in your throat, your feet carry you through the frosty night. Along the dark alleys you both drove with Oikawa’s car a few hours ago. Your body is getting cold, already shaking, but the bitter pain in your heart makes you forget all about it.
Obsessively, you’re trying to think of something else, not what Oikawa is doing to that woman right now. “Y/n! Wait!” Makes you a voice twitch. 
How many times had this woman told him about her success in her modeling career? What was her name again? He obviously doesn’t remember. Oikawa’s eyes silently follow her lips as they move when she looks at him. Did she ask him a question? Damn it…
He wasn’t listening to her. “Hah, you’re hilarious, you know that?” Oikawa smiles, hoping she hadn’t asked him something. But apparently she didn’t, because she just puts her fingers to his chest with a smile, stroll her tongue over her lips before she stands on her tiptoes and approaches Oikawa’s ear.
“You know, we can continue our conversation somewhere else. My hotel isn’t far from here.” She breathes seductively at him, but Oikawa pushes her away, irritated. What the… Without really going into it further, he goes out of the group to go to the table where he was far too rarely today.
On the way there, he takes two glasses from one of the servers who walks through the room with a tray full of champagne glasses to approach the table where you are, with a smile on his face. Where you should be.
Because when Oikawa arrives, there’s no one. The place is empty, your bag is missing. There’s no one at the entrance. He can nowhere find you. A bad feeling spreads in him. Worry that something happened to you, but also anger, that you just left without telling him anything.
How does he look like now? Surrounded by women, but he can’t hold his own one, the woman he loves. His gaze is dark when he asks one of the men at the door if they saw you. But they stay calm. Just tell him that you left the building a few minutes ago.
Oikawa doesn’t let the man finish his sentence, almost jumps out of the automatically opening door. It increases his pulse as he looks in all directions, looks for your silhouette, but does not find you. 
Oikawa’s sports car is still right where he parked it. Sure… Because how could you drive the car if he had the keys? His head thinks about where you could have been now, but his legs are already moving, knowing exactly where you want to go. Where you feel safe and secure. At your home.
His pace keeps getting faster, so fast, he’s almost running, hoping to catch up with you soon. Hoping nothing happened to you in the alleys in the dark. And there he sees you, arms wrapped around your body, the footstep heavy and slow.
“Y/n! Wait!” Shouts Oikawa’s voice as you turn around and look in his direction. He quickly caught up with you, but wishes he hadn’t. Because every step he takes toward you, he sees your sparkling eyes. How they glisten through your tears, reddened as your body trembles.
“Y/n…” He pronounces your name in such a fragile tone as his hands approach you, gently laying on your shoulders. They are freezing cold. He didn’t notice it because of your tears, but now that he’s looking more closely, he sees that your lips no longer have their natural color, that your teeth are clattering.
“Let go of me, Oikawa!” You sniff tormented, pull yourself out of his grip and knock his hands off you. Oikawa… A punch in his face. A blow to his heart. When was the last time he heard his last name coming out of your mouth? Maybe in high school.
“What… Why did you run away Y/n? You made me look like an idiot! And now you’re standing here, shaking and rejecting me while you’re crying? What’s wrong with you?” But he does not finish his last sentence when you interrupt his words so quickly.
“YOU look like an idiot? I stood there like an idiot! Sat there like a gray mouse in the corner while you were chatting with the women! The whole time you let yourself be photographed with them, wanted to avoid all photos with me! Why did you invite me if you didn’t want me there? Why did you flirt with this woman? Why are you doing this?! If you wanted to break up, you could have just told me instead of kicking me in the dirt! Oikawa, go!” 
You yell at him, punch him in the chest before looking at him with hateful eyes. He does not understand your words, does not understand why you are angry, but it offends him to know that you seem to trust him so little. He hadn’t flirted with that woman. So why do you see it like that? Why can’t you see what was behind all this? “I was just trying to protect you!” 
“Protect me? From what? From you? You wanted to show me that until now you only flirted with the women at the events, maybe even fucked them?” You are full of anger, full of rage, no longer aware of your own words that leave your mouth indignantly. Which hurt him.
Because he loves you, always loved you. In all those years you’ve been together, he’s always tried to treat you like his queen. Because he’s the king, and you are his wife. So how could you possibly think he was cheating on you? How can you portray him as a person after all he’s done for you?
“You really think I’d sleep with any of these women? Do you really believe that, Y/n? I can’t believe it…” he shouts at you in horror, doesn’t notice how he steps back and looks at you coldly. 
“You know, maybe I should really go back, really flirt with that annoying chick and get in bed with her. If that’s what you think I am. A cheating boyfriend! I am curious how her breasts will feel in my hands, what her mouth can do and-” Even Oikawa forgets himself, not noticing how he hurts you more and more with every word.
How you shut your ears because you don’t want to hear all this. “Stop it! Stop it! Then go Oikawa! Go and don’t come back!” You call him before you turn around and start running. Run away from him as soon as possible.
You don’t know if he’s following you or going back to the gala, but you don’t care. You just want to go to your house. Get out of this dress, into your bed and under the warm blanket that gives you security.
Back at the gala, Oikawa’s eyes look out for the pretty woman who had been flirting with him an hour ago. It doesn’t take long before he finds her, walks up to her and asks if she wants to share a drink with him.
Seductively, she licks her lips, only nodding as she struts in front of him, wobbling her butt to present it in its best form. “What took you so long, pretty boy?” She asks him, her hand on his thigh, as she sits on the bar stool and waits for the waiter.
“I had an argument with my girlfriend, she was here, too. Well, now she’s not.” For a brief moment, there’s a spark of regret in his expression. A little of guilt as he lowers his head and looks at the hand on his lap, searching for its way to his belt.
“Your girlfriend? Didn’t see her. But good thing she’s not here anymore, what?” She winks at him, but Oikawa doesn’t answer her. Her false fingernails drill into the fabric of his pants, causing him to look into her face with too much make-up. “My room is just around the corner…” 
They exchange wild kisses as Oikawa pushes her against the wall of the hotel room, rips her dress off and begins to play with her breasts. He can hear her moan loudly, as well as the tearing of his shirt and the buttons jumping in all directions. “Shit, we should have done this a lot sooner.” Oikawa groans as he kisses her neck to her breasts.
“Did you hear? Y/n! Y/n!” Your vision becomes unclear, inconsistencies slowly form now that you hear his voice twice. Now that you feel a grip on your shoulders rocking your body. “Y/n!” The voice becomes clearer. The images you had before your eyes become more unclear, disappear.
Instead, you are in your bedroom. The dimmed light of the bedside lamp illuminates the room and surrounds Oikawa’s worried face. You don’t notice your tears running down your cheeks. You don’t notice Oikawa pushing you into his arms. 
It still confuses you. “Shh, it’s okay. It was just a dream.” he tries to calm you down without even knowing what you have dreamed. “Oi… Oikawa?” Your voice trembles at his skin, as does your body. “Please, please don’t call me by my last name. You know I love you and I don’t like it when you don’t call me by my name.” 
His hand gently strokes your hair, his scent flows through your nose, calms you somehow. “But you were… with her…” You sniff, murmur your words indistinctly. Oikawa didn’t understand all your words, but he can imagine what you said.
“Y/n… I wasn’t with a woman. Just with you, right here, right now. What you saw was all just a dream, none of it happened.” Oikawa’s voice lies like a pleasant veil on your skin, calming you with every word as he embraces your face with his hands and makes you look into his chestnut brown eyes. Looking at you with love. “But… you said…” 
“I didn’t mean the things I said. I don’t know what happened, I was mad. I was mad because you just walked away because you had portrayed me as a cheater even though I love you with everything I have. You know, Y/n, I want you to be there. I always want you by my side. But I also want to protect you from the media. I don’t want people following you. That you become a prey just because you’re the girlfriend of a successful volleyball player. I want your beautiful smile all to myself. And this woman, she… I don’t even know what she said. She was just annoying. I know all this doesn’t excuse what I said, and I’m sorry I didn’t think about your feelings when I dragged you to the gala. I thought you’d be there-”
Your lips seal his words before he can finish them. Tightly your lips press against each other, almost painfully, while you want to show each other that you are sorry. You didn’t know Oikawa was trying to protect you from the media, but you’re grateful to him.
“I’m sorry I said all those ugly things to you, Tooru.” You breath in between all your kisses as he presses your body to his, while his hands drive over your back full of desire. “I’m sorry I said all those things too. About you, about that woman… I’m sorry Y/n. Please forgive me, my beautiful queen.” His words are so honest, so pure, yet so vulnerable.
“Yes… Yes, I forgive you, my king.”
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Pairing: Sakusa x reader (break up to make up) Warning: angst to fluff, Prompts: 6. I’ll feel much better if you let me walk you home.” 21. You come here often?”
It’s been three years since you’ve gone your own way. Three years trying to enjoy the places you had previously spent with Sakusa. He had broken up with you, felt like it would be better to go separate ways.
He wouldn’t be able to make you happy if he was just at his training all the time, traveling the world with the Japanese national team and focusing only on his career. But he didn’t pay attention to your feelings. That you loved him, had always loved him, and had always supported him.
It hurt you that he didn’t want to take this step with you, that he let you go even though you had begged him to stay. To save your relationship and look to your future together.
Three years have passed since you tried to forget him. But no matter where you go, no matter who you spend your day with, you always had to think of Sakusa. You always had to think about your relationship, the tenderness and the touches of the past. Sakusa did not like physical contact with others, but you were an exception. He loved to hold you in his arms as you sat on your couch together; you read your favorite book and he listened to you quietly. Taking a bath with you and watching a sequel to your favorite show. Or to go for a walk with you.
But now everything is different. While Sakusa is successful and shines in the spotlight, you try to distract yourself with miserable dates. Except none of these men are like him. No one was interesting. 
Three months ago, you took your friends’ advice, stopped dating, and focused on you instead. You feel like it helped you, because slowly, you started thinking less about Sakusa. Less of your time together. Started to forget about him.
You don’t know why, but today it drives you into the forest, into the little hut on the mountain where you were with Sakusa. You forgot your worries and only enjoyed the beautiful view. Still you like going there, only you don’t think of him anymore, but of the nature that surrounds you, the animals that are on the trees and the ground, until you arrive at the hut.
You have a thin smile on your lips as you walk around the hut to sit on the edge of the small cliff. You bend your legs up to your chest, sit there, watch the sun go down and let the fine spring breeze tickle your skin.
“You come here often?” 
He hasn’t been here for a long time, to be exact. The last time he went this way was just over three years ago. Three years ago, where he probably made the stupidest mistake of his life. Because he had let go of his luck for the career he had always wanted.
He thought it was best for both of you. He thought he was doing all this just for you. So why did it feel so wrong?
Why could he never forget you all this time, why did his heart hurt every time the journalists asked him if there was already a lady of heart in his life? Why did he still have a picture of you two as a background? Why was the cheesy keyring you gave him for fun on Valentine’s Day still hanging on his keyring? After all this time, why did his legs carry him to the one place he loved most after your home?
The sun almost went down when Sakusa arrived at the hut where he used to be with you. In front of the hut is a large rock with a notch that looks as if someone had cut a hoof into it. In your little hiking book he had read that there is a little legend about this, a fairy tale, in that a prince with his horse had taken so much power and energy to jump over the cliff to his princess, that the horse had left an imprint in the rock.
Sakusa still remembers well how you smiled at him when he had read this saga in high concentration. A bittersweet smile spreads on his lips as his fingers touch the rock before he approaches the small hut.
But strangely enough, his legs don’t carry him into it, but around it, as if he wants to watch the last bit of the sunset. But it’s not like that. As Sakusa goes around to get to the small cliff where he has sat so often, his heart beats faster.
He briefly thinks of just turning around, walking, but his words leave his lips even before he can think. “You come here often?” 
Your heart races, painfully contracts with the sound of this voice. You are considering whether it might not have been your imagination, but you are hearing steps that are getting closer and closer to your form.
Hesitantly you look to the side, up to the face, what you had seen the last time three years ago in real life. Not only on a screen. “Ki… yoomi?” Confused, you look at the black-haired man in front of you, who looks down with embarrassment, his hands in his trouser pockets, before looking at the sky. To the mountains where the sun hides.
“Can… I sit down?” He sounds like he doesn’t know what to say, what to do. But you don’t give him an answer, just turn away from him and look forward again. “This is a free place, I can’t forbid you to sit here.” Although his words had a hint of irony, yours are serious.
Your arms clasp your legs tighter as you perceive his scent after he sits down. How you feel his warmth, as his shoulder brushes yours. For a long time you remain silent, say nothing, do not know how to erase this painful silence.
You don’t know why your body goes crazy, why everything hurts again, why his presence makes you fight with your own tears, even though you were so sure you almost forgot about him.
“Y/n... it was my biggest mistake to do all this to you, even though I loved you… Even though I love you.” Delayed, he pronounces his last sentence quietly so that you hardly understand him. But it was crystal clear in your ears. They make your tears flow down your cheeks, drive your emotions crazy.
“I thought I was doing this for us… I thought it would be best for you. You should be happy. But… But instead, I ruined everything. I let go of the woman who was my sun in my darkness. I loved you more than anyone else. I love you more th-” Sakusa’s words are honest, calm as he utters them, but you interrupt them with a shrill cry.
“Stop it! I don’t want to hear another word! Do you know how bad that was for me? Do you know how much you hurt me? Damn Kiyoomi, I loved you! It took me almost the whole three years to even process that you had left me! And I was so close! So close to finally forget about you! But what are you doing? You come here and slap your apology in my face like all this happened yesterday, for what? What do you want from me, Sakusa Kiyoomi!”
Your voice is loud, yet fragile in his ears, now your words hurt him like a thousand stabs. He did everything wrong. He had made you unhappy. But why does it hurt him the most that you almost forgot him? He had to think of you at any time, not even in a dream, to erase you from his memories.
The time passed, the sky turned almost black. He doesn’t see your tears, but he hears your trembling voice fighting your sniffing. Your voice continues to pounce on him, you tell him louder and louder how much he hurt you and at no time does he try to interrupt you.
But you become silent, and he speaks. “Y/n? Do you still love me?” he asks seriously, trying to sound as calm as possible, even though he is afraid of your answer. “Damn it, Kiyoomi…” You breathe now that you can’t hold back your sniffing. 
How can this one question put you back in the time of three years ago? Make you realize you still love him? But you don’t tell him. You just sense how his body moves. A draft of wind tells you that he is thinking of taking you in his arms, but the warmth that was on your body for a moment disappears as if he had changed his mind.
Even though you’re still mad at him, even though you’ve been trying to forget him all along, it doesn’t feel right to sit next to each other in silence. But you don’t want to forgive him so he can hurt you again.
“I never stopped loving you Y/n. But I can understand if you don’t feel that way anymore. I’m really sorry if I interrupt you by forgetting about me… It’s stubborn of me to tell you I want the time back where I would have just kissed you now, where we would have gone home together, laughed and cried.” 
With his words, everything in you constricts even more tightly, your loud beating heart becomes heavier when you straighten up and look for your mobile phone in your pocket to find your way home in the dark. 
“You’re right, it’s stubborn.” Your sad voice only sounds softly as you turn on the light to leave, but Sakusa’s hand pushes yours down. Your belly tingles as you feel his other hand on your shoulder, his body only half a step away from yours.
“I know I’m not in a position to ask, but if you really want to go now… I’ll feel much better if you let me walk you home… Just one last time. Please.” You hear he is serious, that he too is struggling to keep his voice strong.
You know full well that if he accompanies you now, you will never forget him. That your feelings will come back again and that you want nothing more than to feel him on your body, to feel his love. But instead of refusing, other words leave your mouth.
“I can’t stop you from going back with me, can I?” You laugh sadly, but Sakusa doesn’t answer you. He just takes your phone from your hand to hold it forward, so he can brighten the way.
None of you dare say anything to look at the other or touch them. Yet you both search for the warmth. Once on the road, he turns off your cell phone flashlight, gives it to you again before he quickly looks ahead.
You, too, just look into his dark eyes for a moment before your gaze wanders off. Again you are silent. But this time you dare to catch a glimpse, to peek at him, when you notice that his hand, which is usually always in his jacket pocket, now dangles freely at his side.
He used to do that back then. That’s the way he was trying to show you that he was okay with you holding his hand. You’re wondering if all this is just a coincidence, or if he’s doing it on purpose. But your body acts against the fear that rages in you.
Yet your hand approaches his, your fingertips playfully touch his hand before you feel Sakusa’s grip on them. With glowing cheeks you turn your head to the side, do not notice how Sakusa looks at you in astonishment as a slim smile adorns his lips.
He’d like to tell you so much, but he doesn’t know how to start. For a while he thinks about his words, but then you stop, study him with your big eyes, a mixture of fear, pain and hope draws your face.
He notices how the quick moment of hope he had, that everything will be back to normal, is getting smaller. The fear spreads over him. “Kiyoomi? Promise me you won’t hurt me again this time...” He didn’t expect these words. With the words that shatter all his sorrow in one blow, make his belly tingle, make his heart race.
At an incredible speed, he clears the gap between you, letting go of your hand to embrace your face with both hands. His raven-black eyes are powerful, leaving you speechless. “Never. Never, I’ll make you unhappy again. So please, please give me this last chance”, he whispers throaty, his voice weakens when you nod hesitantly, and only a blink later his lips lie on your forehead. 
This time, he won’t hurt you again.
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justimagaine · 4 years ago
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“Melancholy” Series Part 1 -  Oh, fuck them / Chris Evans
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  Life can become a little bit too much. Sometimes you weren’t even aware that something bad was happening, you would just fall apart and then you’d realize the world had become a bit too much for you and your now weakened nerves. Those were one of those bad things about you. You’d push everything to the side, every problem you had you tried to solve it alone when clearly you needed help, you’d help other before you helped yourself.
  So when the moment of your breaking point came you fell hard, so damn hard. Everything turned dark around you. Lost all hope and desire to do anything, even take care of yourself, that included feeding yourself. You would lock away from the world, away from everything and anything. It was just you, your bed and the dark room. Sometimes you’d put on a tv show in hopes the light comedy would help you come out of the state you were in, but it never really worked, but you still tried.
  For you things turned so bad you’d just ignore every phone call or text you’d get. Even went so far as to turning your phone off when it was the weekend and you knew work wouldn’t need you. Doing so meant your friends couldn’t reach you, but you didn’t think anyone would even care to try and reach you or even worry about you. In your eyes you weren’t that important, you kept thinking: No one cares what happens to me; No one can no i’m like this, they’ll make fun of me. Every bad thought would scream in your mind, making you cry until you fell asleep and then the next day would be the same. 
  Work days weren’t that bad. You’d keep your dark mind busy with work things, meeting. Sitting in your office you didn’t have to talk to people too much meaning you wouldn’t have to fake smiles and laughs too much. Some would notice you acting a bit odd and question you on it, but you just brushed it off saying you didn’t get enough sleep and people believed you. They didn’t have a reason not to. You never gave them a reason to think otherwise. In their eyes you were a happy person, that always helped out no matter what. That was true even on your lowest days you’d go out of your way to help other, even the ones that were mean to you, adding to your already dark thoughts and days. 
  When coming home all you wanted was to crawl in bed and fall asleep as fast as possible, but that never went as you wished. It too you hours to fall asleep. You’d try and push your always ruining mind off, but that didn’t work, so you’d put on a video and some music that would drown out your own thoughts and then you’d slowly fall asleep. Sometimes late at night you’d get a text from a friend and you’d usually ignore it, but that depended on the person. When you got a text from Chris asking if you were okay, it took you a while to think of what to do you didn’t want to lie to him but you also didn’t want to tell the truth and upset him, so a lot of times you’d leave the text unanswered and then in the morning just back your sorry saying you went to bed early. He’d try to keep up the conversation but you give him short answers and saying you had meetings. Chris was a good friend and he also wasn’t dumb, so he knew something really wasn’t right, but he also knew better then to push you on the matter or even stop by your work or home without a warning. Even though he already once came by your apartment but you didn’t answer. He knew you were home and not opening your door to him, clearly meant you were suffering. 
  As slow as you thought the week was going you'd soon find yourself on a Saturday in bed, trying to watch a show, wrapped in blankets and red eyes from crying. You phone was off and you opened only Netflix, no social media, no emails. As you episode was nearing the end a video call request jumped out, making you grunt out loud. It was Chris calling and as happy as you were to see his smiling face in that picture you didn’t want to talk to him, so you moved your mouse to decline the call, but your weak, shaking made you click accept and Chris was all over your screen with a quick glace you looked at how you looking in his screen and was horrified, so you bent the screen back quickly, making Chris look at your ceiling. You heard Chris chuckle
  “Clearly you were trying to decline my call.” there was a small pause, he waited for you to say something, but you couldn’t “(Y/N) please bend your screen back.” you still didn’t move, but he could hear you sniffles. “Please, I’ve been trying to reach you for 2 weeks, you don’t call me back or respond to my text like you always do. And you’re not opening your apartment door. I know somethings wrong. This was my only option to reach you and luckily for your little call button mistake I at least know your alive” he sounded really worried, and it hurt you to know it was you fault. With a slow shaky arm you reach over taking the screen and bent it and finally looked at him, but still holding the blanking tightly around your body and half of your face “there’s my girl” Chris said with a excited voice
  “Hi” was all you could say. Chris sighed in the small 2 letter word he felt your sadness and knew you had been crying. All he wanted was to hug you and tell you everything would be okay. 
  “Sweetheart, tell me what’s going on? What happened?” Chris leaned closer to the screen trying to get a better look of you to asses the station, and the damage you’ve caused yourself. In your years of friendship with Chris this wasn’t your first dark, destructive episode. You didn’t think Chris was your closest friend, you defiantly didn’t think he thought of like that, but he was always the one person that could tell something really wasn’t right and he could see it very fast. Sometimes you didn’t even say anything and he already knew something was bothering you.
  “It’s okay. I’m fine” you said the same words you had on repeat for the last week. Chris sighed looking down and shook his head
  “By now you should know better then to lie to me” he looked back at you with the most saddest eyes you had seen on him. “you’ve turned your phone off and it has been off since yesterday afternoon and i I know that because I’ve  been calling you this whole time. You’re sitting in a dark room, and it’s still light outside meaning you’ve made your room dark. This is not good. Talk to me” you felt yourself tear up but shushed them away blinking a few times. You looked in his eyes and felt safe but still scared to tell him what was bothering you, Chris could see that “you can trust me” those 4 words were all you needed and you were spilling all your dark thoughts and worries. Chris listened and didn’t interrupt you, he knew you needed to let it all off your chest. When you felt your self starting to talk slower, meaning you were starting to run out off the things you were keeping in you realized you had been ranting for 30 minutes started and horror came over you. 
“Oh Chris, I’m so sorry. I’ve been complaining to you for so long. I’m so sorry” you said feeling embarrassed. “I shouldn’t have said anything.  I’ve been told I complain and talk too much, that I’m too much” you stopped yourself, when you realized you were complaining once again, buried your face in your blanket 
“oh, fuck them” Chris said loudly, making you snap your head up. Those were the first words he had said since you started talking. You couldn’t help but laugh a bit, a real laugh not like the ones you had been faking at work. “Fuck all of them. Fuck every single person that has made you feel bad about yourself.” Chris was starting to sound angry.  “Fuck those people that told you, you need to stop talk or some shit. You never complain, you’re always trying to be positive about any situation. Those people aren’t your friends, their just...” Chris trailed off trying to find the right words you describe those people that hurt his favorite girl. He looked back at the screen, right in your eyes “their just assholes and they don’t deserve you. You deserve better” his words made you smile and tear up but this time those were happy tears. It had been a long time since someone said something nice to you or about you.
  “I’m sorry, I keep crying, but this time it’s not sadness” you cleaned your tears of and smiled at Chris “thank you for saying that and thank you for listening to me. it really helped” you. You smiled looking down at your tear soaked blanket. “i owe you one” you said laughing and Chris chuckled with you 
  “Okay, then how about you do me a favor” you nodded, always ready to help out, as always. “Let me pick you up and take you to my place. You need a change of scenery, we can drink some beer or wine, watch a movie” you looked around your room and it did make you sad. Everything in your room had soaked up your sadness and felt so heavy,
  “It doesn’t sound like a favor for you” you said to Chris raising an eyebrow, he shook his head
  “No, no it’s definitely a favor for me, see i want to drink but I don’t want to do it alone. I need the company and also” Chris gave you a big smile “I’ve missed you, so this is all for me. Quit selfish i know” he said making you laugh. This offer was beneficial for both of you. After agreeing to his so called favor, your mood got even better. After ending the call you changed, packed an over night bag and waited for Chris to arrive. 
  He was a good friend, he was a great man in general. Sometimes you still can’t believe how lucky you were having him in your life. And there were so many times where you thought he’d ran away from you, let you push him away, like the dark time you were going through right now. But here you were sitting in your living room waiting for him to pick you up and bring you to his home, his sanctuary, Chris let you in his word and he wasn’t going to let go of you this easily, or ever for that matter. 
  You meant a lot to him, more then you knew or even could imagine. When the call ended you didn’t know that Chris had already ready to go after you, he already had his car keys ready. He had planned that if you didn’t pick up his video call he’d drive to yours and bang on your door until you let him in. Chris was determent to make you feel better, he was running out of the house. To Chris you were and incredible person, with  a big heart. A person that always made sure everyone around you were happy even if you weren’t. He thought you deserved to be happy as you can be, he thought you deserved the world and he wanted to give it you. Chris wanted to be the reason you smiled and to night he was on a mission to make sure you smile until your cheeks hurt and laugh so loud the whole world hears it.
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Tag: @chris-butt​ ; @denisemarieangelina
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kuroosdumbslut · 4 years ago
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Relationship HCs for more BNHA Bois
Sero:
yall hve late night talks where you lay in bed and just quietly talk about your day or anything really
usually you both end up falling asleep facing each other and by morning, sero’s on his back while youre snuggled into his side, an arm thrown over his stomach with one of his arms thrown over your waist
its a game of rock paper scissors to see who will make breakfast (funfact, sero intentionally loses so he can be sweet and bring you breakfast🥺)
GAMING NIGHTS where you got the console all set up with snacks and drinks and maybe a pizza on the kitchen counter
for the single player games or when you dont really wanna play and just watch, you get to sit in his lap while he games
OH MY GOD IF HES ON CALL WITH THE BAKUSQUAD: seros chatting with the squad while youre watching him play, silently munching on some snacks, when sero says “hold on guys i gotta pause real quick” and then he asks you, whichout putting himself on mute, if he could get up to go to the bathroom. you say “of course” and move off his lap, only to heal Kaminari scream into his mic about how he wants a cute partner to game with while bakugous cussing his out telling him to shut up lmao
late night trips to the store when you both cant sleep
youre walking up and down the aisles with sero, stopping to look through the snacks and drinks section. while youve semi zoned out, he comes up behind you and holds you. you stay like that a moment before you both pick your snacks and maybe some other small things that you need to get anyways and go home
hes a very cuddly boy and he isnt afraid to lightly tease you a bit
i know this isnt original, but hes a dork and 1000% will want to recreate the spiderman kiss: hes taped upside down from the ceiling, dangling in front of you and you smile, coming up closer to him and pressing your lips to his. when you both pull back, hes red in the face, both from being upside down and from the kiss, and youre cheeks are a little pink, but you both have huge smiles on your faces.
bakusquad meets you pretty early on id say and immediately, they all were like: “sero i swear if you hurt them-” so needless to say you are now apart of the Squad™️ and they would all kill for you
when yall invite a couple or all of the squad over, the nights always end in hysterics: kaminari probably short circuited at one point, baku is being baku, kirishimas calming him down while having a laughing fit
its chaos but its so much fun
some days when sero comes home from work as a pro hero, hes exhausted and kind of down: when the door to your shared home shut, you were up and going to greet your man, but stopped short seeing him look so...frustrated and upset. you offered a silent invitation for a hug, to which he accepted, and while hugging, you pressed dozens of little kisses all over his face and once you finally settled your lips to his, he had a small smile on his lips
he probably proposes to you in a really sweet location, like at one of your very first date spots or at a date where you both still talk about how amazing that date was.
Kirishima:
will introduce you to the squad immediately lmao
hes super sweet, he will get up early (hes used to it from baku dragging him out of bed to train) and make you breakfast, meal preps a lunch for the both of you, and starts to plan dinner when you get up from the lack of warmth he provides
hypes you tf up any time you try on new outfits, are trying to get some tedious project done, or if youre just feeling down
takes you on super fun and cute dates like: one of your first dates was going to the roller rink, and oh my god it was so fun! yall would win little tickets when they had games and if you needed a break from skating, you roll off with him to the snack bar area. you both got a thing of nachos and icees. you sat at one of the many tables and proceeded to eat, chatting and laughing over anything and everything. its still one of your favorite date memories
he games as well with the squad and he also lets you sit on his lap, but the difference is, he announces that youve made his lap your seat and for the squad to be “on their best behavior” to which bakugou immediately told him to stfu lmao
youve fallen asleep on him while he was gaming and when he notices that, he will quietly say that he has to get off and says good night to the squad. he will carry you into your shared bedroom and get you comfy in bed before going off to get dressed for bed himself. hes probably brushing his teeth when he feels you wrap your arms around his waist and bury your head in his back
hes so fucking weak for you 🥺
early morning yall have these little talks (if you arent too exhausted): the sun shines through the curtains and onto your faces, waking you both. “morning baby” kirishima says. you smile and give him a little peck. for a loment, you both stay silent, just gently caressing and cuddling each other before one of you starts the sleepy conversation of whats on the agenda for the day. as you both chat, the sleep slowly ebbing away, you lean in and give him a proper good morning kiss, laughing when he returned the affection by pressing hilariously sloppy kisses to your face and neck
there are times where his job really has him down. one of the sadder times he cane home was when he had lost a member of his team. he demanded his whole agency to take at least a week off to grieve and do what they have to. that day, he came in quiet as a mouse and the moment you saw him, you knew it wasnt a good day. as soon as you hugged him close, he started sobbing. yeah, hes a pro hero and yeah he has to deal with death a lot, but that doesnt make it easier to deal with. youre glad he took a week off and you all spent that week relaxing and, for him especially, just letting whatever emotion come over you happen.
after one of those tough days at work, he had come home both incredibly stressed out and grateful. on a mission, he had to call in backup from Bakugous agency and nearly escaped from, maybe not death, but a blow that could have landed him in the hospital for a pretty long time. he came home, minor cuts and brusies all over him, and while you were fretting over him and cleaning all the wounds, he proposed in near hysterics. he had genuinely feared for his life and if he was going to keep this job up, he wanted you as his forever partner
Shinsou:
at any given time when you both have freetime, youre cuddling
one of you is making dinner? the other is behind them hugging and holding each other
bedtime? you fall asleep entangled
i feel like he would work for Aizawa for a while before he gets the urge to start his own agency, and when he does make his own agency, you help him celebrate it by getting his a kitten. he came home and one of the first things that greets him is this little tabby puffball waddling towards him. he’d look up at you and you smile. “congratulations on the new agency baby, and on the newest member of our little family”
he looked like he was gonna cry 🥺 hes so soft for you, he loves you so much
will invite both friends and mr.aizawa (and his fam) over for the mini celebration you put together. youre just so proud of him yknow?
date nights every saturday. if one if you gets called in to work, you push the time for your date back, only rescheduling if one of you got injured and had to go to the hospital or if it was a longer call
he proposes to you in a very relaxed and sweet manner: so yall are home and its one of those rare times where you both have the next week off together. he wakes up first and just looks at you while you snooze a little longer, and all he can think about is how absolutely adorable you are. the kitten is curled up at the foot of the bed, the sun is just atarting to come in, and when the sun illuminates you, he swears you are a real angel thats blessed him. when you wake up, the first thing you see if him looking at you like you’re the most beautiful person in the world. when you gave him a soft morning kiss, he finally snapped out of his trance and pulled you closer to him, pressing small kisses to your head before breathing out, in his sleep ridden voice, asking you to marry him.
the rest of that week was spent telling friends and family that you got engaged. he tells aizawa he got engaged and not 10 minutes later, a knock from your front door is heard. aizawa congratulates the both of you and hands the both of you a basket with wine and expensive looking chocolates. while aizawa didnt stay long, you could tell he was both happy and proud of and for the both of you 😭❤️
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the-slasher-files · 4 years ago
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OC: ANDREI KULOKOVA - NSFW ALPHABET
18 + ahead. Andrei is a freak and I cannot stop thinking about him so he needed this post badly.. hope you enjoy 🔪💕
MASTERLIST
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Usually Andrei is very attentive after sex, especially after a particularly rough session. He will clean you of any blood, kiss your bruises and cuts, stroke your hair and call you his perfect little mouse.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His own favorite body part would have to be his hands and his teeth. Andrei’s hands are very skillful, and he likes to work with them any chance he gets either for murder or for love. The man has extremely sharp canine teeth that he loves to bite, plus Andrei knows it makes him sexier and more animalistic.
Andrei loves his partners neck and back. He goes wild if you have short hair or have your hair up, he will just sit there watching your back and neck as you make him dinner, loving how the muscles move and flex, adoring every bone in your back rise and fall, they’re just so breakable. It feeds his feral side if he sees you faulting the mark he has given you.  
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
This boy likes it messy, big time messy. It is almost like an animalistic desire to see you covered in him and even yourself, if you mix a little blood in there too, oh boy, you’ve unlocked feral Andrei. He does also have a huge breeding kink and he will fill you up one thousand times over, finger you watching it ooze and drip, then rubbing it all over you and him. Andrei is nasty. He might even eat you out while your dripping his cum out of you.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He secretly wants to be a sub but it will take a long, long time for him to get there and be comfortable being a switch. Andrei loves his partners to ride him and that is his submissive side wanting to be released, but he will always act as if he is in control. 
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Andrei is defiantly experienced in sex, but in a relationship, that’s a bit different. He is very good at sex and he knows it, but he tends to be a little selfish and loose himself, just jackhammering into you. Often Andrei has “fun” with his prey and has paid more than he would like to admit for a good time.   
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Missionary, doggy or having his partner ride him. Missionary is by far his favorite, Andrei wants, needs, to feel you writhe under him, he wants you to look him in the eyes as you cum, and feeling your pulse under his fingers.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Andrei is a very serious man in every way, and sex is often very intense, there is no room or enough air to laugh, but after a long time of being together he has a strange silly side to him. Especially if you catch him off guard with a joke he doesn't quite understand, "You are interesting little mouse" or Andrei's sadistic humor comes out when you jump a little too much at the flick of his knife.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Andrei is not a hairy man by any means, so he is very fortunate enough to let his hair go and it is still only a medium amount of hair. Not overly long, curly light brown, but he likes to keep it under control for the most part. Andrei also has a little treasure trail.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Now Andrei has no clue how to be romantic, it is never something anyone had ever shown him, so keeping you alive, living together and sex is his romance. Andrei is very intense in the bedroom and will kiss and love you there but outside of the bedroom, you might have to help him. Intimacy can be hard because he is very touched starved, the small touches and gentle kisses is something that is hard for him, so don’t be mad if you go hold Andrei’s hand and he pulls away. You need to teach him a lot in this department. His favorite thing is holding you though, either sweeping you off your feet or holding you on his lap, man loves it. 
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Andrei is a horny man who is gone a lot from home so of course he jacks off. Sometimes even if you’re at home he will call you into the bedroom and will just be fisting his cock smirking at you
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
This guy has so so many but his top favorites are blood, breath play, knives, predator/prey, breeding, daddy, fear play and bondage. He is a creative man with a lot of time on his hands.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Andrei will literally take you anywhere he damn pleases, from the field to the abandoned buildings to any surface in the house. He lives in the middle of nowhere so why bother trying to hide.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
This guy is horny 89% of the time, so just always watch your back for the wolf lurking in the house. Your new pair of jeans that hug your ass just right? careful. Batting your lashes when looking up at him? watch out. If you really want him to get going, get yourself something sliky and lacy that puts your body on display, straddle his lap with one of his knives in hand, holy shit Andrei will lose it. 
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Andrei honestly doesn't have many no's and he will try it at least once before saying no. Absolutely no mommy kinks, given his past. Humiliation is a big no, he will never do it to you and you should never do it to him. Overly dominating him in his life, if you are worthy enough to see his sub side only use that in the bedroom, if you take that into every day life by ordering him around or asking for certain tasks done he is going to be very annoyed and pissed off. With you Andrei only wants a few simple things like cleaning his house, making him dinner and cuddling on the couch, other than that you are a free person, he won't try to really control you much. Just don't be stupid by leaving or putting yourself in danger or else his control and overbearingness comes out.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Now Andrei loves to see his s/o writhe, whimper and beg for him. It's an animalistic need. And he is stupidly perfect with his tongue and his hands are extremely skillful. You will have a great time with him going down on you, just watch his teeth if he gets too carried away and he loves to tease and edge so he might be down there a while. However Andrei doesn't go down on you too often because he knows he just that good, and he's an ass. But if you thought just because he doesn't go down on you often means you are off the hook?? Nope. He has a huge thing for getting his dick sucked and he's going to make you do it constantly.. sorry.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Andrei is a delicious, addicting mix of both in a way. He might edge and tease with foreplay for hours but the wolf is going to intensely and roughly ruin you, but if he is switches positions with you he likes to take it slow for a minute just watching you, praising and stroking your hair, probably wiping a tear or blood away, then back to impaling you. It's a true battle between the wolf and Andrei all they time.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He is a big fan, mainly just because he is horny a lot and has a lot of work to do. It's and instant anger/stress relief for him. But at the end of the day if you can quiet his mind enough Andrei enjoys watching you to crumble slowly under his hands and go for a long, long session.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He is an ex soldier and mercenary, of course he's a risk taker. Andrei, like I said before, likes to try stuff at least once before saying no. Also being with him everyday is a risk in general, with all his knives and blood obsession.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
This guy has stamina for days. You would think with all the cigarettes he smokes he would be dead in 10 minutes, but boy were you wrong. His hunts can go on for 10 hours or more sometimes, so you are at least in for 3-5 rounds at a time. If Andrei has been gone on a mission for a month or so and comes home you are not leaving the bedroom (or where ever he wants to fuck you) for at least 2 days.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
He doesn't necessarily like toys to make you or himself cum but for teasing he will totally be down for it. Andrei rather just use his mouth or hands. Skin on skin is what he likes.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Andrei adores teasing so much, he wants to break you down, bulid you back up then pick you apart again and again. He will put a plug in you all day just making sure you're ready for whenever he chooses to come home. Edging you is his favorite past time, he will do it until you cry and he will wipe the tears away and say "you're so beautiful myshka"
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He is not very talkative in his everyday life but man is a huge dirty talker when getting into it. He also produces wolf like growls deep within his throat creating the most sinful and sexual noise you had ever heard
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Silly drunk Andrei is my personal favorite, and it doesn't happen often at all so take it and run with it. He will start Russian dancing and almost failing over telling you watch him and learn, its very serious to him that you watch. He will also start singing old Russian songs from his childhood, loudly and wildly. Love and cherish this Andrei.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Man is a big boy all the way through, even below the belt. A good 7 inches and thicker than average. Circumcised with a beautiful rosey head, and 2 large veins running the length.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Man wants to go literally all the time. He has an inhuman sex drive. If you just tell him you want him Andrei drops everything and bends you over the nearest surface.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Andrei has a hard time sleeping and winding down. His active mind just will not stop, so he really enjoys just watching you sleep on his chest, being gentle with his hands along your body and in your hair. If you don't fall asleep very fast either now is the perfect time to talk with him, get stories of his missions, Russian folk tales, funny stories about his brothers in the military and brutal childhood. He just wants someone to share his pain and his love with at the end of the night. Run your hands along his scars and in his hair while you're at it and you will have tamed a wolf.
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alice-angel12x · 4 years ago
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Riddle x Mouse!Reader
The reader is a mouse beast-man that is 7.5 inches tall in normal form.
It was odd going to a school completely designed for larger students, and it took a lot of convincing to get the crow man to let me attend the school.
The entrance ceremony was a little awkward cause the headmaster had to lift me to the mirror to be properly signed to a dorm. And wouldn't you know it, I was assigned to the Heartslabyul Dorm. I happily hopped down and climbed up to my seat, next to a redheaded boy. 
He looked so serious, yet he was shaking in his boots, so I thought I would lighten the mood.
--------
I made it and into Heartslabyul dorm no less.
"Hello there," Squeaked a voice. 
I looked around looking for the source, but only saw Trey and a space next to me.
"Down here," It squeaked again.
I looked down at the chair beside me to see a tiny Person with Mouse Ears and tail. They looked no bigger than a teacup, why is such a tiny student doing here.
"I'm Y/n Angera, What's your name?" Y/n squeaked with a cute smile.
I could feel my heart start to quicken and pound in my chest as I stared at this tiny person, But why, why do I feel this way.
"Are you okay, your cheeks are red," Y/n said in a curious.
"I-It's nothing, M-My name is Riddle Roseheart," I said as I tried to recompose myself.
"It's nice to meet You Riddle," Y/n said as they held out their tiny hand.
"Likewise, So where do you come from?" I asked as I gently shook his hand.
------------
"I come from Whisker Town," Y/n said squeaked proudly.
Riddle blushed at the tiny person's cuteness, as his heart fluttered in his chest. Riddle tried to compose himself as he looked away from Y/n while muttering something just loud enough for Y/n to hear.
"If you e-ever need help with something just ask, Okay," Riddle mumbled.
Y/n's eyes widened at the sudden offer, but They smiled none the less.
"Thank you, Riddle, that's very kind of you," Y/n squeaked.
"I-It's cause rule #543 of  Heartslabyul, help your fellow Dormmate. You should memorize all the rules," Riddle said with a snobby pout as his cheeks stayed a slight red. 
"well Thank you nonetheless, Riddle," Y/n smiled.
-------
From that day on Riddle would help Y/n around the school, From helping them get to classes, helping them upstairs, Studing, and other big people tasks. The two would enjoy their study sessions and tea parties together. 
"Y/n that tea cup is too tall and big for you. Your going to fall in," Riddle warned, as he watch the tiny mouse person try to drink from the cup.
"NO, no I got it," Y/n said as he leaned over the lip of the cup.
And just as Riddle warned, Y/n fell into the cup of hot tea. Riddle gasped as he quickly fished out his tiny friend. Y/n coughed up some tea as Riddel craddled them in his hands. Riddle could feel his heart race as Y/n continued to cough up tea, and slowly sit up in Riddles shacky hands..
"I told you not to do that!" Riddle scolded as his heart slowly calmed down.
"In know, but.." Y/n paused, " That was some pretty good tea,"
Trey who was also at the table chuckled slightly as Riddle's face turned red from frustration.
"You could have gotten horribly burned you.. you idiot," Riddle mummled as he put his mouse friend down on the table.
"Sorry Riddle. I didn't mean to scare you like that," Y/n apologized.
"it's fine just don't do that again," Riddle mummbed.
As Riddle spent more time with Y/n, he would notice a few students from their dorm would pick on his favorite tiny friend.
But when he brought it up with the dorm leader, he simply shrugged his shoulders and did nothing. This angered Riddle, as he challenged the Dorm head the next day and won. Making him the youngest dorm head ever.
At first, things were pretty good, Y/n was thankful that Riddle put a stop to the bullying, and it helped them to get along with the other Dormmates. 
But naturally, things slowly started to go downhill. Riddle started to become more and more uptight and strict as the months passed. At first, it wasn't so bad, but then it started to get intense.
When Y/n would be a few minutes late to lunch and drank lemon tea passed a certain time, it was an Instant scolding. If Y/n was fooling around with fellow dormmates st a tea party, is punished by forced to write a 2 paged apology. No one was spared from Riddle's punishment, not even his close friends. Y/n soon found it harder and harder to keep up with all the rules that Riddle enforces.
"Hey Y/n are you feeling okay," Trey asked as he helped his underclassmen up the stairs.
"I don't think I can keep up with Riddle and his rules. Just look at me! How can any think sending a 7-inch tall student, to feed 4 feet tall birds, is a good idea?!" Y/n ranted.
"Well Riddle is just trying to uphold tradition," Trey tried to defend.
"I was almost eaten by a bird yesterday, Trey," Y/n said with an unamused face.
"Well, let's just turn in the apology paper," Trey said not knowing how to respond to that comeback.
"I don't think I want to come back to Heartslabyul anymore," Y/n sighed.
"Y/n don't say stuff like that," Trey whispered.
Little did the two know, Riddle heard everything, and Y/n's words caused Riddle's heart to ache. But he quickly shoved those feeling down and locked his heart as he begrudgingly excepted his Tiny Dormmate apology essay.
------------
I can't show lenience towards anyone, rules are equal among everyone. If I have to feed the flamingos, everyone feeds the flamingos. I will show no favoritism to anyone, not even you...Y/n.
But it seemed that Y/n meant what they said, cause the next day was the next unbirthday And Y/n was no where to be seen.  They weren't hiding in the tea pots with the door mouses, or playing tricks on fellow Dormmates. They just vanished, but according to Trey he still sees them around and attending to his classes. They've been spending a lot more time with the nonmagic student Yuu and that trouble some first year, then...me.
No if they wishes to be a lazy traitor, fine. So be it. Yet Why do I feel like I've been abandoned?
------------
"are you sure you can beat Riddle, Ace?" I asked as I held onto his magic blocking collar.
"He sounds pretty strong," Yuu said with a worried tone.
"I can totally could take on that shorty," Ace said with a cocky smile.
"This won't end well," I sighed.
And It really didn't; Riddle was able to beat Ace in a second. Ace being Ace started to spout off about the unfairness of Riddle's reign, while starting a miny revolution in the process. Then everything went to hell. 
____
"Riddle , I challenge you to a duel for the Drom head stautes," Y/n squeaked as they hopped off Yuu's shoulder.
"Haha, A tiny thing like you, Face me?" Riddle laughed with a Cocky smile, " Your just as much as a rule breaker as that first-year, and you will always need the help of others just to do basic student activities. I'm so many leagues above you Y/n. You amount to nothing just like Ace," 
Y/n simple glared at the taller boy, but Riddles gaze didn't go noticed from Yuu. He could see some sort of anger and sadness trying to be covered up with pride and regalness. Y/n just glared as Riddle kept on monologing on and on about the rules.
"What sort of lessons were you taught that you can't even understand that?" Riddle smirked, " Your home town, Whisker Town must be tragic. I bet that you didn't even receive proper education before you step foot into this school. Truly Pathetic".
Y/n's eyes began to water at Riddle's words as they started to try hold back their tears of frustration and anger. With a battle cry Y/n dashed towards riddle as their body began to glow and grow.
Suddenley Y/n was Trey's height, as he ran and punched Riddle square in the nose. Everyone was still in shock at Y/n's spontaniouse growth, but Y/n slowly began to shrink and just bearly met Riddles hip .
"It looks like Mantaining that form drains to much of Y/n's energy," Crowley said as he observes his students.
"So Y/n has to limit his magic use, or else they'll get to tired?" Grim asked.
Suddenly an egg was thrown at Riddle, and everything escalated, as Riddle's overblot took control. With a swift hand movement everyone was wearing Riddle's magic blocking collar, and Y/n was forced back to their 7 inch tall body. The sky turned dark and rubble started to float up into the air as Riddle changed and turned into a monster.
"I am.....! I'm ALONE!! I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO IS ALWAYS RIGHT AND DON'T NEED ANYONE!!" Riddle cried out.
"R-Riddle," Y/n gasped at the transform class mate.
"I do not need anyone who defies me in my world. Or leaves me, I am the absoute ruler. My world itself submits to me!" Riddle laughed darkly as he grabbed Y/n by the tail," I will not tolerate any other answer except, "Yes, Lord Riddle."! 
Riddle tossed Y/n hard onto the ground and Y/n's world went dark.
------
"Y/n-san, Y/n-san are you okay?" A voice asked.
Y/n opened their eye's to find themselves in the infirmary, with their head ,left leg, and torso wrapped in banages. 
"Good, your alive. Thank goodness," Yuu sighed in relief.
"What... Happened to Riddle. Is he okay?" Y/n asked slowly.
"Yeah he's fine, You were out for 6 days. Oh and know that your awake, Riddle wanted me to invite you to the unbirthday tomorrow. He wanted to apologise to you," Yuu said.
"Well, umm..... It would rude to turn down an invitation," Y/n smiled wearily.
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Riddle sat nervesly at the main table as he waited for Y/n and Yuu's arrival. A tiny tea set and table was set up for them. 
Soon Y/n and Yuu arrived, as Yuu set Y/n down on the table. Y/n held their minature cruches at their side as they sat down at the tiny set up for them. The two sat in an awkward silence till Riddle cleared his throat to call Y/n's attention.
"I-I wanted to say sorry... For the things I said and for hurting you. I let myself get out of hand," Riddle apologized as  tears ran down his cheeks.
Suddenly Riddle felt a gentle hand wipe away his tears. He looked up to see Y/n, but about his height and was smiling down at him with a kind and soft look.
"I Forgive you Riddle, just please don't cry. It doesn't suite you," Y/n smiled as Riddle blushed slightly.
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starbuckie · 4 years ago
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𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐚 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝
challenge: the cbc 1k writing challenge by @captainscanadian​
prompt: “do you treat all your hookups like this?”
pairing: carter baizen x reader
words: 4.7k words
warnings: fluff, angst, assault, swearing, some degrading comments, and implications of the sexy times 
summary: waling up next to one of New York’s most eligible bachelors brings on a lot more than what you expected.
a/n: what’s up y’all! i’ve essentially been dead for the past two weeks, but i’m back! i lost motivation for a bit, but i feel a lot better now, and what better way to come back then a little carter baizen? i ended up writing a lot more than originally intended, but i like the way it turned out. anyways, enjoy, and thank you for all of your support<3 
main masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist
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As you awoke with a long stretch and yawn, memories of the previous night had you smiling like an idiot. Sunlight streamed from the half-closed blinds of your windows and the smell of coffee wafted to your room from the kitchen. You grabbed your lover’s dress shirt from off the floor and slipped a pair of satin slippers on your feet. 
The night before had been amazing. It had started with a beach reception when you had finally caught his eye. The two of you had been playing a game of cat and mouse during the whole wedding, only giving lustful stares and shy smiles, but when you finally had a hold of each other, your night only got better. The rest of the night had the sounds of only tearing clothes, pants, and moans. 
Snapping out of your sweet reverie, you stared at the man in your kitchen. His bare back was faced towards you, giving a great view of his shifting muscles while he made pancakes. A bowl of mixed berries were laid out on the table, along with strawberry syrup and mugs of Peruvian coffee. “Do you treat all of your hookups like this, Baizen?” 
Carter, finally noticing your presence, turned around and gave you a heartwarming smile. He flipped the last few pancakes over and walked over to wrap his arms around your waist. Burying his face into the crook of your neck, he mumbled, “Haha, cute joke. After everything we’ve been through babygirl, this was definitely not a hookup. And I only treat my favorite person like this, so eat up.” He gestured towards the food on the table and with a quick kiss to your lips, turned his attention back to the pancakes.
You sat in one of the chairs and took a sip of steaming coffee and looked out of the ceiling to floor windows surrounding the room. The New York City skyline would never get old from this view, no matter how long you and Carter had had this penthouse. Sighing, you looked down at your left hand, the sun casting light on the diamond on your fourth finger. 
You had been engaged for only six months, but it didn’t feel like anything new. At the age of 33, you didn’t feel any different than you did ten years before or even ten before that. Hell, you always knew that you would be Carter’s friend, but one drunken night had changed that very quickly.
As your fiance joined you at the table, he set a plate of warm pancakes in front of you. Sure, he could have had your housekeeper, Marybeth do it for him, but he also liked pampering you himself. Together, you sat in silence and stared out the windows. Carter tore his eyes away from the city to study your face. He would never understand how after twenty years of friendship, it ended with him finding his one love and putting a ring on your finger. 
“Hey, baby?” He asked, and you hummed and met his gaze. “How’d we even get here?”
You smirked and replied with, “Well, I walked from the bedroom, but I don’t know about you?”
“Don’t be cheeky,” he said, pinching your elbow. You swatted his hand away and smiled. “Anyway, what I meant to say before I was so rudely interrupted, was how did I end up with the most beautiful girl on the Upper East Side?”
“Well, if I recall, it started with me being fed up with your stupid ass, and you finally confessing that you had been madly in love with me since we were thirteen.”
“And I still am.” He moved towards you to place his lips on yours. “You’re mine now, baby.” You grinned against his lips and went to sit on his lap.
“Mr. Baizen, you’ve had me from the moment I laid eyes on you. With that cute little schoolboy outfit, and your hair! Oh god, remember-”
With a playful glare, he cut you off as you giggled. “We do not need to talk about my middle school style, fiancee, but I will gladly talk about when I fell in love with you.”
“That sounds good.” You smiled at each other and went back down memory lane, into your long, long, shared history.
20 YEARS EARLIER
Looking in the mirror, your maid had finished tailoring your school uniform. When she deemed you presentable she scurried out of the room to help your mother, and you immediately went to call your best friend.
“Carter, are you ready for our first day? We’re finally in eighth grade. Next year I’ll be headed off to Constance and you’ll be going to St. Judes, and there’s gonna be a whole ton of hot guys-”
Your friend’s chuckles were heard through the phone. “Y/N, we haven’t even begun the first day yet.”
“Yes, I know, but we’ll be one step closer to the best years of our lives!” Your mom’s voice called you from downstairs. Oh crap. Only the Lord knew that Andrea L/N did NOT want to be kept waiting. “Okay, my mom’s coming, but we’re coming to pick you up right now. I’ll see you in a few minutes.”
“See ya soon, Y/N.” You smiled at his voice and responded.
“See ya soon, Baizen.” You hung up the phone and ran to your vanity. Making sure your mascara wasn’t smudged while you had dressed, you spritzed on the Chanel perfume you had stolen from your mother's room. Truth be told, you only dressed up for Carter, but you would never tell him that. 
His parents were two of New York’s socialites, famous and wealthy, so they got along well with your parents. Though your dad didn’t pay too much attention to you, your mother made sure you kept up with your grades and social life. She was always the shoulder to cry on, offering you wisdom and advice. Not to mention, but your mom was a fantastic shoe designer. She was truly the greatest woman you knew. The two of you grew up closely with his sister Caroline, from the time you were babies to now. Caroline had gone to a boarding school in France in the fifth grade, but that didn't tear your friendship, and only made it stronger. However, while you stay poised and polite, Carter had always had a bit of a bad boy streak. Albeit, he was charming and sweet, sometimes too much for his own good, but the two of you were opposites. Yin and yang. Sun and moon. At the age of thirteen he was the Upper East Side’s darling sweet-talker, who had girls and boys alike fawning over him. 
Including you.
You never realized when you had started developing feelings for your friend, but it was a huge shock to you. It helped that he was cute as hell, but you got to see the sweet side of him, that was respectful and caring. He always made sure you were comfortable and happy, giving you a small sliver of hope that he liked you back. You always helped him, whether it was being a wingwoman, or giving him schoolwork, you were always there at his beck and call. 
The next seven years were absolutely painful for you, however. In high school, he charmed the skirt off of every single girl at Constance, and constantly blew you off for hookups and dates. When he was cut off and went to travel the world, you called him to make sure he was okay, though he always seemed fine to you. You stuck with him through everything, and the more you went on, you barely knew the man who claimed to be your best friend. 
Dating Serena was the last straw. You were twenty-one, studying political science and business to hopefully one day become a lawyer. Your father had disapproved of your majors, but your mom fully supported you. 
Sighing and putting your textbook away, you stood up and went to put something on for the party you were invited to. Normally, you would have stayed in your NYU dorm, but Carter had miraculously managed to get you to leave, claiming you needed to meet his girlfriend, who you didn’t know at the time. You grumpily slipped on a champagne sequin dress, and grabbed your white stilettos to match. After hailing a cab, you were off to Blair Waldorf’s house, unknowingly driving to the end of you and Carter’s friendship.
You had to admit that the party wasn’t half bad. Blair certainly knew how to decorate, and it wasn’t hard to believe, considering her mother was the infamous designer, Eleanor Waldorf. You bumped into a lot of old classmates from your high school years, and grudgingly exchanged greetings. When you finally found Carter, he had his arm slipped around the waist of a pretty blonde, making your heart drop to the pit of your stomach. He turned around, and let out a smile that normally would have made you happy, but instead filled you with dread. 
“Y/N! You made it! This is Serena Van der Woodsen.” As you went in to hug your friend, you were stopped by none other than Serena's hand stuck out for you to shake. 
“Hi, it’s so nice to meet you, Y/N. I’ve heard so much about you.” You stared into her blue eyes, and were immediately filled with envy and irritation.
You had no right to be mad. You knew Carter could date whoever he wanted, but at this point you didn’t care. Exhausted, you started to yell at the couple.
“Really, Carter? You go off to travel some other goddamn countries and come back to date a high schooler? A child? Who the hell do you think you are?” The entire room went silent, all of their attention focused solely on the college girl who went crazy. Serena stared at you, absolutely dumbfounded. As she came to her senses and started to yell back, Carter stopped her.
“Y/N, let’s go outside,” he gritted out. His eyes were burning red, and you could tell he was furious, which was never a good thing.
However, at this point your emotions were so heightened that it rivaled his anger. Once the two of you were outside the building, he started lecturing you. “What the fuck was that, L/N? I introduce you to my girlfriend, and you start yelling at her. You have no control over who I date, and you have absolutely zero right to insult them. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
He knew he had hit a sore spot there. He knew your deepest insecurities, how you were self-conscious about your body, and how you were saving yourself for the one. No one had ever looked at you throughout high school, and even if they had, you would’ve been too blinded by Carter to see any of them. He had always had you wrapped around his finger.
You chuckled mirthlessly. “You are such an asshole, Baizen. I have been there for you for years. I was always there to make sure you had done your homework, I looked after you, I fucking lied for you. I have done everything for you, and for fucking what?”
“So you yell at my girlfriend? I never knew you could stoop so fucking low, Y/N.” He glared at you, on the verge of tears, and saw that your face was already wet as well. “Oh, poor you. Cries whenever someone raises their voice at them. You had no right to say those things about her. What are you, jealous?”
Your heart stopped beating in your chest. It was the longest five seconds of your life, as tears ran down your face in hot paths, and he stared at you, for once, not knowing what to say. 
“You are.” His gaze turned sympathetic. “Wait, Y/N, I never knew-”
“It doesn’t matter, Carter,” you yelled, “I don’t fucking care anymore. I’m not gonna go on loving you, because it’s never gonna happen and I can’t sit around to wait for you. I’m done.” With that, you left, his last memory of you stomping off into the streets of Manhattan at midnight. 
PRESENT
“That wasn’t my best moment exactly.” You cringed, face flaming from your actions that had taken place that night.
Carter placed his hand on your jaw and rubbed your cheekbone. “It wasn’t your fault, I was kind of an idiot. But in a way, I’m kind of grateful, because that really woke me up to what was happening outside of that little bubble I was in. It made me see what I had lost, and remember that it was you who finally saved me from the hole I was digging myself farther into. You were my hero. Still are.”
You grinned bashfully. “But then we ended up seeing each other two years later at that other party.”
“Oh god, the party,” he smirked, “we had some fun then, didn’t we?”
“I can’t remember, we were both drunk as fuck.” 
10 YEARS AGO
The last two years had changed you. You had still focused on school and kept up with your studies, but the old Y/N was no more. Carter Baizen had ruined your life, and now you were just getting a taste of what you had missed out on in high school. A barrier surrounded your heart, with the one rule of no man staying in your bed for more than a night. You had a reputation to uphold, of course. Every social event now had your name on the attending list, and guys were lining up at your feet for a night with you. Your hair was longer, the clothes you wore out flashier and your style rivaled that of Serena Van der Woodsen’s. You were unattainable and everyone knew your name.
Your father’s private jet flew in on the evening of December twentieth. Merula, your family’s maid, helped carry your bags from the jet and your mom greeted you with tons of hugs and kisses. However, that didn’t last very long, as you had a party to attend. Going up to your old room, you took a quick, yet luxurious bath, and went to fix yourself up. Your old closet was still intact, and you were happy to know that the short red dress you had bought five years before still fit you. After you slipped on the dress and your black heels, you curled your hair in loose waves, and swiped on some dark red lipstick.
You were dead set on getting laid tonight. But then again, when weren’t you?
With a goodnight call to your mom, you ran out to the limo waiting outside your family’s penthouse. Giving the driver the address, you pulled your compact mirror from your Valentino clutch. Flawless. Like any other night. Paying attention to your looks was now tiring. And this life was lonely. You hadn’t had any friends besides Carter at the beginning, but now you were truly by yourself.
Carter. You hadn’t thought about him in a long time. In your furious haze after the incident two years ago, you blocked him on all forms of social media, and ignored any headlines from Gossip Girl including his name. It was lonely, naturally, but you had enough men filling your bed to avoid you from the empty void in your chest. The void that was filled with whispers telling you to apologize, to call him, to take him back, because the truth was that you missed him like hell.
The party was full of college kids, neatly dressed in the chandelier-lit room. Ugh. So far you couldn’t see any lookers. A couple of guys who looked like they were in their late twenties were eyeing you up from the corner, and grabbing a flute of bubbly champagne, you headed in their direction, licking your lips. As you crossed the room, you could feel more eyes on you but you didn’t dare look at them. No, you liked being in charge, controlling the room. Heels clicking against the marble floor, you blatantly checked out the tall blonde in the middle. He was pretty handsome. Cropped hair, a muscular frame, and electric blue eyes that kind of reminded you of Carter. 
Stop thinking about him, go get laid.
You stopped in front of him. “Hey, pretty boy. Can I get your name?” 
He wasn’t even fazed by your flagrant introduction. You were absolutely shameless, and though you received glares from the other women in the room, you couldn’t have cared less. “I’m Steve. What’s your name, beautiful?”
You opened your mouth to speak and Steve’s eyes widened as he saw the figure that shouted out your name, abruptly stopping you. “Y/N?”
Freezing, you prayed that it wasn’t him. His voice that haunted you daily, and made guilt and sadness pool in your gut. It had to have been your imagination. You started again. “Sorry, but I’m-”
“Y/N.” Turning around, you came face to face, well, face to chest with Carter Baizen. He had grown taller since you had last seen him. Even with the noticeably darker bags under his eyes and growing hair, he was still as gorgeous as ever. 
“Hey, Carter.” Steve had walked away by then, not wanting to intrude, but at that moment, he was the only person you needed. Heart beating in your chest, you finally met Carter’s eyes. “How are you?”
His mouth was gaping a little, taking in your form, seeing that it was so much different than it used to be. “I’m good.” Pausing for a moment, he added, “You look great.”
A blush rose to your cheeks and you managed to mumble out, “Thanks.”
“Can we talk?” 
That’s how you ended up outside on an empty balcony overlooking Manhattan. Taxis and honking were heard, but it was fainter due to blood rushing in your ears. 
He opened his mouth to speak, but you cut him off. “Carter, before you say anything, I want to let you know that I’m sorry. I really am. Last time we saw each other, I knew what I did was wrong, and though I was in love with you, I had no right to be upset.” Sighing, you placed your hand in his. “Can we be good again? I really hate how we left things off.”
Silently, he nodded his head, eyes wide and subtly taking you in again. The last two years hadn’t been kind to him, after Serena dumped his sorry ass, and he ended up with no money and nowhere to run to. His mom had allowed him to stay in the family house for a while, and his father was even giving him a second chance at running the company, but it wasn’t easy for him. He was slowly spiraling down, and only when he saw you did he wake up and take a look at himself properly. He looked like a piece of garbage next to you. He hadn’t even gone to school, and here you were, even more beautiful, which he never thought was possible, and a successful law student at Harvard.
“We’re good, Y/N. I brought you out here for another reason though.” He paused and looked at you as you nodded for him to continue. “It’s been a few years, I know, and I shouldn’t be saying this now, but I miss you so much. These past few years have made me realize how much of a fool I am for you, but God, I’m in love with you, Y/N, I always have been.”
You stood up, anger coursing through your veins. Now? When it’s most convenient for him? No. You needed to get drunk. “I’m sorry Carter, but I fell out of love with you one hell of a long time ago.” Swallowing the lump rising in your throat, you continued your lie. “You made your decision, I made mine. I wanted to be friends, Carter, but I can’t have that laying around us.”
Stomping away, you heard the crestfallen voice of Carter. “Y/N, wait, please.” He stumbled his way over to you, and caught your hand again before you ripped it away. “Please, Y/N, please, I’m in love with you. I’m sorry I was such an ass, I was so stupid, please.”
Tears fell from your eyes as you shook your head. “I need a drink.” 
He numbly nodded as you made your way back inside, asking one of the servers for a gin. You needed to get drunk. It was a necessity at this point, and as you got more and more tipsy through the night, you found your way back with Steve. By now the party had started to get crazier, people making out in corners and drunkenly stumbling everywhere. Steve held you up as you grinded against him, but stopped when you felt his hand go up your dress. 
“No, no thank you,” you slurred.
He smirked, giving you a steely glare. “You’re asking for it with this slutty little dress and winding me up.” He forcibly grabbed your wrists and started to drag you to a bedroom. “I own you tonight, baby.”
Before you could scream, someone came over and punched Steve in the jaw. You were speechless, staring at his already bruising face. Once again, you were being pulled away, only this time, out of the party. The person dragged you back to your place, and your drunken mind asked, “You wanna come in?” 
Without another word, the two of you were attached by the mouth, clothes being thrown haphazardly around your room. Earlier events from the evening wiped from your memories, and you could have only hoped that your parents weren’t home. Falling into your bed, you and your unknown lover tore up the bedsheets for several hours until you both drunkenly passed out.
When you woke up the next morning, you looked up. You silently thanked yourself for closing your windows before you had left the other night, and only then realized you were cold, naked, and in your own room. 
“What the fuck.” You whispered to yourself. Throwing on a robe from your closet, you looked around seeing the scattered clothes from you and whoever you had spent your night with. They were still here.
You flew down the stairs at a record-breaking speed, and slid into the kitchen, risky business style, and saw a familiar head of brown hair sitting at the table. “What the fuck, Baizen?”
Carter calmly turned around, smiling as he blew into his coffee. “Damn, Y/N, good morning to you too.”
Scoffing, you grabbed the newspaper he held in his hands and started to whack him with it. “Ow, what the hell?” He grabbed your wrists to calm you, then pulled out a chair next to him for you to sit. Reluctantly, you sat and frowned at him, raising an eyebrow to ask what happened. “Do you treat all your hookups like this?”
“Did we…” You didn’t even want to finish that sentence.
“Sleep together piss-drunk after you told me you didn’t love me back after two years? Yes, we most certainly did, beautiful.” Though your face burned red at the old pet name, you asked for what had happened. “Well, the asshole you were dancing with tried to get you in bed, but I came over and punched him, while we were both still drunk, and I got you back here, and you offered me to come inside and we fucked.”
Your eyes were comically wide, and he would have found the situation really funny if his heart weren’t beating erratically inside his chest as he awaited your full reaction. “So,” you started, “you're still in love with me.”
He tried not to let his embarrassment show, but his cheeks flamed anyway. You smiled genuinely, but you were terrified of whether he meant it or not. “Do you mean it, Carter?”
You stared into the depths of his eyes and he answered, “Yes. I’m so sorry that I was a horrible, horrible friend to you, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness. And I know you already expressed how you felt about me, and let me say, I understand completely. If you want me to, I’ll walk out of that door right now, and you won’t have to see me again. But if you let me stay , I’ll spend every waking moment of my life making sure you feel happy and loved, and making it up to you.”
He stared at you with pleading eyes, and held your hands gently. Suddenly, stinging tears obstructed your vision, and you whimpered. “I love you, Car,” you gave him a watery smile, “never stopped.”
His eyes started to tear up as well, and smiling you finally pressed your lips to his, taking in the moment. The past few years had been torturous for you both, dealing with the loneliness and pain from your broken friendship, but slowly and surely you two built trust. It took a long time, and you took the relationship slowly, but patience was key, and it was all worth it in the end.
PRESENT
“And now we’re here?” You asked. Carter combed his hand through your hair, the soothing action making you rest your head on his shoulder.
“And now we’re here.” He glanced down at you, smiling and pecking your lips.
“Damn, we had one dramatic-ass story.” He chuckled at that and sighed.
“We sure did, baby. But hey, look at us. We’re on top of the world right now. We have a wedding in a few months, you don’t have any cases, and I have the most beautiful girl in the world in my arms right now.”
You smiled against his neck. “Hey, Car?” He hummed against your hair, looking out the window. The sun had fully risen, making the room glow. “I know we haven’t had this discussion in a while, but are we ready to have kids?” His brow furrowed, but he said nothing. “Car?”
“I mean, sure, we’re both doing so well right now, and we could raise a kid here, right? We’ve got an empty bedroom right across from ours, and we’ve got plenty of space here. I think with the combination of me and you, we’d have a pretty great kid. They’d definitely have my eyes though.” 
“They better have your eyes.” You looked up at him. “So pretty.”
He chuckled and kissed your forehead. “The wedding’s coming up pretty soon though, so we can start trying after that.” You laughed as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Before we get too old.”
You smirked and rolled your eyes. “We’re thirty-three, Carter, we aren’t that old.”
He laughed and said, “I guess you’re right.” Heart beating in your chest, you sighed loudly. “What brought this on?”
You cupped his cheek and took a deep breath. When you had taken the test a week before you had been elated, only to freak out after realizing Carter might not feel the same. But you had been okay for ten years, right? When the two of you had finally gotten together, it did take a lot to find that balance in your relationship, but hell, you were getting married in a few months. Carter was your best friend, number one supporter, and fiance, so you prayed that he would be just as excited. 
“Carter, I’m pregnant.” Looking at him dead in the eye, you hoped that he would be happy. You awaited his reaction for a few seconds, and you wanted to scream in anticipation.
And then you saw it. 
His eyes started to water, and his hands moved to your stomach. ”Really?” He asked, voice wavering. You nodded, eyes beginning to tear up as well.
“We’re having a baby, Mr. Baizen.” You laughed joyfully, as he picked you up by your waist and you wrapped your legs around him. Hands found their way around his neck as he pulled you in for a kiss. 
Tears poured from his eyes, as he laughed. “I love you so, so, much, baby.” Hiding your face in his neck, you giggled some more. “God, we’re having a kid. I swear on my life, I’ll do everything to make sure you and this baby are happy for the rest of our lives.”
And he did. Not such a bad hookup after all, now was it?
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ldyinblckmsk · 4 years ago
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Pairing: Todoroki Shouto X GN! Reader
Genre: Angst
Words: 1k
A/N: Hey guys! welp this is my first time finishing a story. Yep, I'm a sucker for angst. I have so many plots in mind and all of them were just sleeping in my drafts ugh. This may not be a good one but I'm quite proud of myself for writing this one. I hope this gets attention ohmygod. Enjoy!
I wanted to make ya'll cry, so listen with this song.
----------------------------------------------
Everything is a blur. You were just outside of your house, sitting at the floor in your front porch with another can of beer on your hand. Crumbs of chips are everwhere on the floor together with five cans of beer that was making a mess. The cold breeze of the night makes you shiver and the alcohol isn't enough to warm you. It's not like you don't want to go inside your house. You just can't.
Because today seems like the devil is casting you a curse with ridiculous bad lucks you encountered, enjoying your torments as you make fool of yourself. Burning your liver with the bitter concoction as your mind wandering to the sole reason why you were out of yourself lately.
You didn't even know how you end up with a cellphone in your hand, dialing a familiar number as you squint your eyes trying to clear your vision. You found yourself laughing as you tried to copy the ringing of your phone while waiting for him to pick up.
Todoroki is surprised when he saw your number on the screen. He thought that you already deleted his contact when the two of you called it off last month. Confused as to why you're calling him at 3 AM, he picked up his phone, eyes still adjusting in the dark.
"Hello?"
On the third ring, you nearly jumped when you heard his calm and deep voice, excitement course through every veins in your body. His groggy voice gave away that you woke him up. Heart beating than the usual rhythm against your rib cage, you exhaled the air you didn't know you were holding before you speak.
"Hey!" You cringed when you heard your voice rising its pitch. Oh shit, that sounds like a mouse that had been caught in a trap!
"I'm glad you picked up, Shou." You giggled at the cute nickname, slurring some words that gives him a hint that you're drinking. You're drunk to the point that you're doing things that you'll regret when you wake up. "I thought you're not going to answer me hmp." You pout, your cringey childish self showing up.
"Y/n?" He's confused, checking his phone if it's really your number who called him and not some teenager's prank.
"It's already late. Why are you still up?" His concerned voice makes your heart clench.
"I want your hugs right now, Shou."
"Hey, did something happened? Are you okay?" You shushed him, shaking your head. "I'm fine. I just wanted to tell you that I missed you and I'm sorry."
"I missed our lazy date nights. I missed your cuddles. I missed the smell of your cologne. I missed how you ruffles my hair while you placed a kiss on my forehead. I missed wearing your hoodies..."
You let your drunken self take over you allowing yourself to verbalize all your true feelings you've been hiding.
"I missed you, love." You bitterly smiled at the endearment you used. It brings back thousands of memories you didn't want to forget but you didn't want to also remember either. It's just there locked in a box somewhere in your heart but you're conversation with him released all of it. And every single of them pricked your heart like needles.
The bi-colored hair man didn't know what to say. Hell, he can't even think properly. You're drunk and you're telling him your sober thoughts. He thought you're completely over with him, seeing you smiling while you're hanging out with your friends like nothing happened broke him apart. And yet here you are confessing to him.
"C-can I go see you?"
"No." You were taken aback with his immediate reply. Nodding to yourself as you let out a chuckle. You're proud to yourself that you're still not crying, always so good at hiding your emotions.
"It's late, go to sleep." His voice is cold and distant. But you didn't let it affect you as you shoot your shot again.
"I-I'll bring lots of your favorite soba. Cold ones are always perfect, right? Just wait, I'll get a ta—" He cuts you off. You heard a painful sigh from the other line.
"Y/n, We...already broke up." Hearing those words makes the alcohol in your body immediately disappear. With those sentence, you instantly sober up. "We broke up. Month ago."
He repeated like he's trying to make you remember it. It was just a misunderstanding. He's aloof and oblivious personality didn't understand your outbursts. You did trust him but his constant hanging out with Momo riled up your insecurities. And funny how they are a couple now.
"Yeah and I'm wasted." You chuckled as you began to cry, quietly, biting the inside of your cheeks while trying to control your emotions.
"Don't come here. You need to sleep. Drink lots of water when you wake up. We'll talk tomorrow–"
You cut him off before he hangs up, hands fiddling the hem of your shirt. "You know... it's been a rough day. Everyone's being mean to me."
Silence answers you but you still continue ranting to him. "I nearly got fired for standing up for myself when a customer throws her coffee on me because I accidentally messed up her order. T-then, I-I lost my fucking keys and it's cold."
"I lost the keys of my house."
You're having a hard time controlling your emotions now as you complained to him like a whiny child. Tears slowly cascading down your cheeks while you let out sobs.
"It's cold, Shou. I'm cold. And everything hurts. I wish you were here right now but, yeah, we already broke up." You didn't let him talk. "Just so you know I'm happy for you even if it's her."
"I'm right. Momo's better for you."
You were just sitting there, at the corner of your front porch. Deeps uncontrollable sobs squeezed your lungs. Your phone long forgotten as it slips from your hand and met the cold floor while you completely breaks down. You hugged your knees tightly burrying your head, serving as your emotional support now.
Pretending that you're already moved on from your heart ache. Smiling and fooling yourself that you didn't want him anymore. Saying you're fine when you found out that he's recently dating Momo.
All the pent up emotions you've been keeping from showing explodes like a burning magma finding its way out of the volcano. The cold air hits you again and this makes you grieve louder while shivering at the sudden drop of temperature.
Bullshit.
Out of your shrieks of anguish, clock hitting another hour you spent outside, phone still light up with your ongoing call with him, wind hitting your pitiful state, slowly and smoothly, tiny crystals glowing when lights hit it just right–snow descends from the sky.
"Fucking keys," you cursed. Eyes already heavy as Hypnos cradles you to sleep.
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jamielea81 · 5 years ago
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Conversations
Chapter 12
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Description: You accompany your friends on a day trip to Animal Kingdom Theme Park where you meet Scott Evans by chance. This one afternoon leads to a year long friendship with both Chris and Scott over text messages and phone calls.
Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader
Warning: Little angst, lot of fluff. A curse word or two.
Word Count: 5,542
A/N: I know nothing about the lives of the Evans family and mean no harm. This is purely fiction and for fun. Reblogs and comments are much appreciated! The tag list is now closed. Each chapter tends to get reblogged from me a few times, so if you’re following me, you can’t miss it.  
*Italics are internal thoughts
Catch up with Chapter 11
**
A less drunk person would be more concerned that her old friend, kind of ex flame, and now kind of friend is sitting comfortably in her favorite chair in the middle of her living room.  As if this is how one normally spends a Saturday night. But not you. Those last few shots really took the edge off. You were happily munching on tacos with the boys. Albeit making a mess, but you would have to worry about that tomorrow.
“I want mouse ears!” Chris fake pouted.
“Ya can’t! It’s a Sassy and Grumpy exclusive,” Scott stated.
“’Sides, you don’t have a nickname. Oh! Dork! Dork is your nickname,” you shouted.
“Dork is not my nickname,” Chris said.
“Yeah, even I think that’s bad,” Scott said, earning a shove from you.
“Should we watch a movie?” you asked.
You were tucked closely next to Scott and Zach on the couch while Chris sat in the upholstered chair on the far end of the couch from you.
“Princess Bride?” Chris asked, eyes hopeful.
“Nooooo. That makes me sleepy,” you whined much to Scott’s enjoyment.
He threw his arm around your shoulders and pulled you close. “Does someone not want to go sleepy?”
“I just ate a bunch of tacos,” you sighed out, patting your stomach. “We should go swimming!”
“I don’t think so sweetheart,” Chris quickly said.
You stuck your tongue out at him. No one said you were mature.
“Buzz kill!” Scott yelled.
“Party pooper!” Zach added.
Chris apparently would be babysitting the drunks tonight. He did not see that coming when he booked his ticket late Thursday night.
With most of the taco mess cleaned up, you grabbed a few of throw blankets from your bedroom closet and passed them out. Zach was already out with his head laying against the back of the couch.
Chris queued up the Hangover. Poetic Justice? Maybe.
Scott had gone to the kitchen, mixing you a random cocktail of whatever he could find in your refrigerator. It wasn’t a good idea, but neither of you were thinking.
“Heeeey. What’s that?” Chris asked pointing at the two glasses in Scott’s hand as he takes a seat and passes one to you.
“Mind ya business,” Scott answers firmly.
“Do you both need to still be drinkin’?”
“Yes,” you answered simply enough, taking a long drink from the glass, promptly coughing at the burn. “Is this that raspberry shit?” you questioned Scott.
“We have to use it up,” he said with a shrug.
You closed your eyes and took another big sip, promptly sticking your tongue to the taste. Chris chuckled, shaking his head.
“You guys are idiots,” he said.
“Takes one to be one! Wait. Takes to be one to know one! Damnit!” you shouted.
“Takes one to know one!” Scott shouted.
“Thank you,” you said, laying your head on Scott.
“I got you girl,” Scott said.
“Can always count on you,” you said pointedly to Scott.
“Heeeey,” Chris chided.
Surprisingly Zach slept through all the shouting.
The movie played on with the three of you contently watching. Twenty minutes in, Scott zonked out, his head resting on Zach’s stomach. Both of them lightly snoring in tandem much to your amusement. The two allies had suddenly left you defenseless against the eldest Evans. You were in no state to talk to Chris and you really hoped he didn’t bring up the two of you dating again in your weakened brain capacity.
Maybe I should go to sleep.
Deciding to chug the rest of Scott’s specialty concoction, you quickly got up to rinse your glass in the sink before briskly walking into your room. You realized quickly that you were not staying in your own room, so you quickly backed out the door and into the guestroom.
“Night, Y/N,” Chris called out. You waved your hand, but didn’t bother to turn around.
**
You weren’t sure what time it was, having left your phone in the living room and not bothering to install an alarm clock in the guestroom. All you knew is you were sick. You woke in a cold sweat, body shaking, slightly disoriented as to where you were. You needed to get up and get to a bathroom before you made a mess on the bed. You cursed yourself for drinking so much just because Chris had shown up. This was mostly Scott’s fault by feeding you shots earlier in the day. The tacos and chugging that last drink were strictly the fault of your own.
On shaky legs, you got up from the bed, and slowly moved to the door, opening it with what little strength you had. You made it to the hallway but then your stomach started to turn. You quickly dashed across the hall to the bathroom, well, dash was a strong word. One foot was able to push off the ground with some semblance of agility before you other knee started to drop. You practically slid across the hardwood floor, scrambling on hands and knees to the toilet, promptly emptying your stomach into the bowl. You started to cry, always hating the way your stomach convulsed as if it was no longer connected to your body. A second wave of nausea hit when you felt a hand on your shoulder. The person kneeled beside you, brushing back the damp pieces of hair from forehead as you held onto the bowl for dear life.
It wasn’t until he spoke, did you know that it was Chris that was rubbing soothing circles on your back.
“I got you sweetheart,” he said softly.
The tears continued to flow as you dry heaved a few more times into the toilet bowl.
“Do you feel like you’re done?” he asked gently.
You nodded your head yes slightly. You were afraid too much movement would cause another wave of sickness.
Chris got to his feet, gently placing his hands under your armpits to slowly lift you up. Once you were off the ground, he held onto you with one arm and lowered the toilet seat with the other.
“Why don’t you sit down for a moment and I’ll clean you up.”
He helped you lower yourself to the closed lid before moving to the linen closet to grab a washcloth. He turned on the hot water and let it run for bit before soaking the cloth then ringing it out. Chris wiped gently around your mouth before bringing it back under the water again and ringing it out a second time. He ran the cloth over your forehead and then along your cheeks.
“Do you think you’re going to throw up again?”
“No, I think I’m done.”
Chris nodded his head. “Let’s get you back to bed.”
“I need to,” you point at your mouth and scrunched your face. Chris chuckled, moving back into the closet pulling out a bottle of mouth wash.
You got up gingerly, holding on to the vanity for support. Chris place an arm around your waist to keep you steady while you rinsed your mouth.
Although you were weak, you probably could have managed to get back to bed by this point, but Chris wasn’t letting you go. The two of you walked across the hall with one of his arms wrapped around your back before gently helping you settle on the edge of the bed.
“I really think we should get you changed; you’ve soaked through your t-shirt. You nodded in agreement.
Chris turned to the closest opening the accordion style doors before turning around to face you.
“S’not my room. The dresser in my room,” you said, pointing out the door.
Chris gave you a gentle smile before exiting the room. You heard him knock lightly before hearing the sound of muffled voices. You were still pretty drunk and still unaware of the time. In the morning you would be embarrassed, right now you just wanted to lay down and go back to sleep.
Chris came back in the room a short while later carrying another t-shirt and gym shorts.
“Let’s get you out of this sweetheart,” he said, setting down the change of clothes next to you.
He pulled at the hem of your shirt as you lifted your arms for him to pull it over your head. Chris kept his eyes on yours and you frankly couldn’t look away. Once the new shirt was situated, you stood up on unsteady legs and slid your sleep shorts down. Chris grasped your hands as you stepped out of the shorts. He knelt down to help put the new pair on as you rested your hands on his shoulders for support.
“You’re all set.”
You dropped to your butt, scooting up the bed to get to the pillow. Chris pulled the sheet and blanket over your legs and then brushed the palm of his hand over your forehead.
“Thank you,” you mumbled.
“I’m going to grab the trashcan just in case you need it,” he said while leaving the room. He was back a second later, setting it on the floor near your head. “I don’t want to leave you.”
“No room,” you said slight shrugging a shoulder.
Chris grinned, lowering his head and shaking it. “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”
“Okay,” you replied sleepily.
Chris came back in the room carrying two pillows and a blanket, setting them on the ground before leaving the room again. He entered again this time carrying two couch cushions, placing them on the floor on the other side of the bed before retrieving the pillows and blanket and laying down.
“Now remember, your trashcan is on that side, I’m on this side,” he said. You hummed in response. “Night sweetheart.”
You didn’t respond as your senses were coming back to you slightly with your emotions on the brink of escape.
“Y/N, are you still with me?” he whispered.
Tears started to sprout for the corners of your eyes. You held your breath, trying to pretend you were asleep, but it came out like a whimper in your drunk state.
Chris sat up, placing a hand on the mattress. “What’s wrong? Are you going to be sick again?”
It was dark, but your eyes had adjusted and you could almost make out his face. You attempted to hold back the tears once more but it was of no use.
“Sweetheart, please tell me what’s wrong.”
“I-I’m sad at you,” you whimpered out, fat tears rolling down your cheeks.
It was the best way to describe how you felt about the two of you. You weren’t mad, although you had been mad when you first saw the photos, you were generally just sad at the situation. Sad that the last two times you were supposed to get together hadn’t turned out.
“You’re sad? At me?” he asked. You nodded your head yes and closed your eyes. Chris got to his feet, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Baby, I’m so sorry that I hurt you.”
You opened your eyes, seeing that his face was much closer to your own. “It’s not all you. I’m just sad that this didn’t work out. It’s too hard,” you said between soft sobs.
Chris leaned forward, placing a kiss on your forehead. One hand wiped the tears from your cheeks. “Can we please talk tomorrow? I promise there’ll be coffee.”
You gave him a small smile and nodded. The two of you really needed to talk about your relationship. In the middle of the night when you’re still drunk is definitely not the right time.
“Okay.” He stroked your cheek again before pulling up the blanket to your chin. “Try to get some sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.”
“Goodnight,” you said softly.
“Night,” he said, going back to the floor.
**
It was morning, but you were still unaware of the actual time. The room was bright with the shades doing nothing to block the sun’s rays. You stirred slowly as the massive headache did not aide your motivation to get out of bed. Zach and Scott weren’t set to fly out until late afternoon, so at least you knew that you had not missed their exit. You were sure Scott would wake you anyway.
You remembered a lot of the night, well, mostly what had occurred when you woke up and found yourself sick with Chris taking care of you. The rest you remembered bits and pieces. Starting now, you were officially giving up drinking shots. You were much too old to drink all day, especially shots.
Leaning over the side of the bed you saw that Chris as well as the cushions, pillows, and blanket were gone. It was probably for the better as you didn’t want to have that conversation right this minute.
When is he flying out anyway?
After taking a few more minutes for yourself, you crawled out of bed and walked across the hall to the guest bathroom you found yourself very acquainted with last night. You brushed out your hair, washed your face, and then brushed your teeth. Showering could wait until later.
Taking a big breath, you opened the bathroom door and shuffled down the hallway to your living room and kitchen. Scott and Zach sat at the kitchen island eating pancakes while Chris maned the stove making more.
“Hi,” you said shyly. This was your house, but it felt odd to have other people living in it while you slept.
“Good morning, princess,” Scott said, getting up from his barstool. He pulled you into a hug and rocked you back and forth. “How are you feeling?”
“Like shit. How about you?”
“Better now that I ate something.”
You hummed in response, leaving his embrace to place a hand on Zach’s shoulder before walking up to Chris at the stove. You placed a hand on his upper back while you went to stand beside him.
“Hey sweetheart. How are you feeling?”
“Massive headache, but otherwise I’ll live.”
“How many do you want? You gotta eat,” Chris added when you didn’t immediately respond.
“Just two.” He nodded, flipping over the pancakes that were in the pan. “Listen, thank you for taking care of me last night.”
“Of course,” he said, turning to face you. “I’m sorry you got sick, but I’m glad you were able to get some more sleep after.”
You gave his arm a squeeze before turning back and taking a seat next to Zach at the island.
**
Scott and Zach left your place at two in the afternoon. Scott whispering “good luck” in your ear after hugging you goodbye.
Chris and you walked back in the house, both heading into the living room sitting on opposite ends of the couch.
“So,” he started
“Thank you again for taking care of me last night. I drank way too much, though Scott is most to blame for that.”
“Why were you guys day drinking anyway?”
You chuckled softly to yourself. “Okay, um. Hmm. I’m pretty sure Scott was trying to get me nice and drunk because he knew you were coming.
Chris wiped a hand down his face but his lips were turned up in a smile. “Suppose I deserve that.”
“No one deserved that. Especially my liver. I still feel like dying.” You gave him a soft smile, grabbing a throw pillow and wrapping your arms around it. “So, why did you come out here anyway?”
It was an honest question. You had called off whatever the two of you were a week ago and then he shows up at your door.
“I wanted to see you and spend time with you. I know you want to go back to being friends and I will respect that, for the time being,” he said.
“Such a brat,” you said.
“Me? Me?”
You took the pillow in your hand and wacked him with it.
“Well, I am happy to see you. How long are you staying?”
“A few days?” he asked. “Didn’t exactly book a return flight.”
You shook your head and scrunched up your lips at him.
“Well,” you said, clapping your hands together. “We need groceries. And you do realize I have to work.”
“It’s fine. Told you, I’m your pool boy,” he said wiggling his eyebrows. “Besides, I get you for breakfast and dinner. And I’m just realizing how dirty that sounds.” He said chuckling.
“Oh my god! Such a brat,” you said shaking your head once again. “I’m visiting Boston in October.”
“You are?! Staying with me?”
“Scott.”
Chris pouted his lips.
“Don’t give me that look. He offered and you told me your house is having work done,” you reasoned.
“Still livable. Just can’t use like half of it,” he shrugged. “Maybe a third by October.”
There was a beat of silence before Chris’ smiling face turned serious.
“I don’t like that you’re sad about us. I want us to get back to what we were, before a dating relationship even began. You are one of my closest friends. You mean so much to me, Y/N.”
You grabbed his hand and scooted closer to him.
“You’re one of my closest friends too. When we first started talking regularly, I never thought it would be anything more than that. Then you got a little flirty with me and I flirted right back. Then one day you surprised me and said you were coming out here and we had a good day together. Well, a good second day together,” you said, earning a smile from him. “Then you kissed me and it changed everything. I just didn’t realize how hard it was going to be. The distance. You live an entirely different lifestyle from me and I’m not used to that. Don’t think I’ll ever be used to other women throwing themselves at you. I mean, I can’t blame them, but it’s not something I want to see. I need more than seeing you once every few months, even once a month. If you’re filming, that’s one thing. But in the beginning of our relationship, not to be able to see you and plans getting canceled last second. It’s just not helping.”
Chris takes your joined hands in his other hand. “You’re right. We weren’t being fair to us. I wasn’t being fair. Let me show you what we can be. Please let me show you how great we can be together. I should’ve said.” He licks his lips. “I should have said from the moment we kissed that I wanted to give this an honest try. There’s shit I have to think about more. Need to think about the stuff I don’t normally have to when I’m seeing someone from the industry, or someone who lives in the same city as I do. That’s on me and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have canceled on you this last time.”
You shake your head at that. “This is your job Chris and you got that role. You had to go.”
“I coulda pressed to reschedule. Shoulda called you after because of course, you’re important to me. But I was stupid and got drunk.”
You shake you’re head again. “I’m not trying to change you. You’re allowed to celebrate with friends. Just maybe think about me during those moments. Send me a text. I think it bothered me more because we were supposed to be spending that time together. But I should have spoken up and said, ‘hey, can we Facetime when I get home?’ so it would have been like we were still together like we planned.”
“You’re right. I think we both need to be a little more honest with what we want. I’m willing to take this slow if that’s what you want, but I’m not trying to spend time with anyone else. I’m not going to do that to you.”
You took a deep breath, exhaling slowly out your nose. The idea of trying again was scary. Would it be much of the same? Only seeing each other every few months wasn’t something you wanted.
“How would this work?” you asked.
“Well, much like yesterday, I’d fly in more often. You have to work every week, so it’s easier for me to come to you. I won’t take any last-minute meetings when I have plans to be with you. We’ll…”
“I want to go on dates,” you interrupted. “Like actual dates. Nothing that’ll draw unwanted attention to you, but I think jumping right into semi living together isn’t going to do us any favors. Not that I don’t want you here. I want you here. But people go on dates.”
Chris chuckled. “Dates.” He nodded his head slowly. “Yeah, people go on dates. We can do that. Every time I’m here, I owe you a date.” His eyes crinkled and you couldn’t help but stare.
Do his eyes always crinkle like that?
“Oh! Okay. Good,” you said with a nod. “Good.”
“I promised you coffee today. I know it’s already way past morning, but do you want to go to that place you love?”
“Um, nah, we can skip it today.” you said nervously.
Chris gave you a questioning look. “You sure?”
“Well, uh.” You licked at your lips. “Me and Ethan, my ex, we used to go there every Sunday. Don’t want to run into him by chance,” you said with a shrug. “We’re not on bad terms or anything. Would just be kind of awkward to run into him there.”
“Then we find our own place. A place that we go to every time I’m in town.”
You smiled widely at that. Our own place. Suddenly you had the urge to kiss him, so you do. It was fast and chaste but it felt right. You pulled back to see a large grin on Chris’ face.
“We are still going slow,” you reminded him.
“Of course. Didn’t even think otherwise. I do have a question though.”
“And what’s that?” you asked.
“Do you only get to decide when we kiss?”
Smartass.
“Well, I suppose you get to decide on the half the kisses. It’s only fair after all.” Chris started to lean in. “But! We are going slow,” you reminded him again.
“Right, right. I’m taking you on a date tomorrow anyway. So, maybe I’ll get that kiss.”
“Maybe.”
**
There was something so domestic and familiar about coming home from work to find Chris on your couch watching TV.
“Honey, I’m home.”
“Cute,” he said, getting up. “You need to get changed into something casual. I’m taking you out.”
Oh! Right. We have a date.
Despite you being the local, Chris had taken it upon himself to look places to go nearby.
Dressed in jeans, a short sleeved pink blouse, and flats, the two of you were out the door twenty minutes later. Chris insisted on driving you in his rental, something about it being the date he planned so he was going to drive.
Thirty minutes later, Chris pulled into a nearly empty parking lot of a brewery you hadn’t been to.
“They have a food truck here that’s supposed to be really good,” he said.
“Sounds good to me!”
The two of you decided to grab a table outside rather than going inside where it was a bit more crowded. The patio had an overhang with a few ceiling fans as well as white twinkle lights that ran the length of the cement slab. There were over thirty brews and ciders on the menu, so Chris spent a good amount of time going over the menu, sending the server away more than once. You couldn’t help but laugh each time he told her we needed more time. You decided on a pineapple cider within minutes of arriving. After much deliberation, Christmas ultimately decided on a plain old lager.  
“That was an amazing thing to experience,” you said with an amused tone.
“What was?” Chris asked, eyebrows furrowing.
“That whole taking a long time with the menu thing,” you said gesturing one hand down the drink menu in the middle of the table.
“Hey! I have a particular set of taste buds that need to be thoroughly pleased. One does not simply pick a beer at random Miss cider. What’s up with that? Cider…”
“It’s got pineapple! It’s yummy,” you said sticking out your tongue at him.
“M’sure. What do you say we go take a look at that food truck?”
**
Chris pulled in your driveway at ten minutes to nine. The two of you walking hand in hand to the front door. You tempted to let go of Chris’ hand to grab the keys from your purse, but he wasn’t having it. He pulled you until you spun around and into his arms as if he were a salsa dancer.
“Whoa,” you said, your arms resting on his shoulders for stability.
He grinned at your response, one arm going around your waist while his other hand rested on your cheek.
“What are you doing?” you whispered.
“Kissing you goodnight.”
And he did. It was slow, almost torturously slow. You peeked your tongue out of your mouth, but he wasn’t playing fair as continued to mold his lips to yours. It was all soft lips and gentle caresses that you let yourself melt into. He slowly removed his lips from yours but kept his face close, time almost standing still.
“Maybe we can do this again sometime,” he said softly.
Heat instantly filled your cheeks. He was a such a dork, but he was your dork.
“M’hmm,” you replied. “I think I’d like that too.”
He kissed you again, but this time you pulled back first. “Okay, bye!” you said, turning away from him, unlocking the door and closing it in his face. Really, this was a date and he already kissed you goodnight, it was only fair to toy with him a bit.
You counted to ten and then slowly opened the door. Both palms of his hands were resting on the door frame as he leaned forward, head bowed down.
“Are you coming in or what?”
“Sassy, livin’ up to that nickname,” he said walking through the door and closing it behind him.
When you were ready to turn in for the night, you kissed softly outside your bedroom door before sending him to the guestroom for the night.  
Chris left two days later with promises to return soon. You felt a lot better about your relationship this time than when it first began. Having a serious talk about your feelings really was needed. He really wanted to give your relationship a go even if it meant going slow.
**
Two and a half weeks later, Chris was warming your front door with a big smile and a small suitcase. He cooked you pesto eggs before work the next morning and took you to the cinema for a late night showing. He didn’t press when you set the guestroom up for him again this trip. As much as you wanted to, you didn’t want to jump right back into bed together.
The next day you were supposed to be at work, but instead, you were in your favorite coffee shop, in the back corner away from the noise of the afternoon coffee breakers. A little bit of guilt plagued you because Chris was in your home while you were supposed to be in the newsroom.
Asia Williams’ business card sat snug in your grip with your cell phone’s keypad waiting for you to simply type in her digits. You needed to do this. Chris was making all this effort to come see you. Despite your plans to be in Boston next month, he had already made plans to come see you in another two weeks. Even though Chris was an experienced traveler, he would eventual run himself ragged.
Taking a deep breath, you dialed Asia’s number and crossed your fingers.
“Asia Williams,” she answered.
“Hi Asia. This is Y/N Y/L/N. We met at the conference last month. Brooks Cole’s friend.
“Yes, hi Y/N. It’s nice to hear from you. Have you thought more about my offer?”
“I have actually. I’m looking for a change, but I have something I’d like to propose,” you said.
“Okay, I’m listening.”
“I’d like to stay on as a freelancer with the Orlando Sentinel. I’d only cover Disney for them. Ride openings, hotel openings, major anniversaries. It’s the Magic Kingdom’s 50th next year. But otherwise I’m exclusively yours.”
“And the Sentinel’s okay with this arrangement?” she asked.
“I believe they will be, but I wanted to run it by you first. If they’re not, it will be tough to part ways, but I believe you organization is the next step for me.”
“I believe it is as well. Why don’t I send over a contract, you speak with the Sentinel, and call me if you have any questions.”
“Thank you, Asia. I’m very excited to come aboard.”
“I’m excited to have you. Do you think you’re going to stick with your home base of Florida like Brooks did?” she asked.
“I’m not entirely sure yet, but a big move is on my mind.”
“We’ll chat soon then.”
“Sounds great. Talk to you soon.”
You took another deep breath, letting it out slowly as a large grin eased itself on your face. This was going to be a big change, but you were ready for a challenge.
You grabbed a coffee on your way out the door. You needed to meet with you boss James before he left for the day, a surge of caffeine is exactly what you needed.
**
“Honey I’m home!”
“Is that ever going to get old to you?” Chris asked from your kitchen.
“Nope.”
“What do you think of chicken parm for dinner?” he asked.
“I think that sounds delicious, but I’m taking you out to dinner instead,” you said, giving him a quick kiss on the lips.
“Not that I don’t like this whole you treating me to dinner thing, but what’s the occasion?” he asked.
“We are celebrating. I got a new job,” you grinned.
“You did?” he exclaimed. “I didn’t even know you were looking for something different!” He threw his arms around you hugging you tight.
“Honestly, I’ve been thinking about a change for the last two years, but I was scared to make a move. I still have to look over the contract a second time, Jana’s already looking it over for me too, but it’s pretty much good to go. It’s going to be a lot different. I actually met with my boss at the Sentinel and they are going to keep me on as freelance. Basically, I get to cover what I want when it comes to Disney.”
“That’s great sweetheart! Where will you be working?”
“News Now. It’s an online news source.”
“I’ve heard of it. Actually, I use it quite frequently. That’s amazing. Since it’s online, do you get to work from home?”
“That’s actually one of the benefits. I can work from anywhere. Visit my family, visit you, and still work. I get to take on stories I care about. They want a lot of opinion pieces from me too. I’m nervous as hell, but also really excited.”
“This is amazing,” he said, giving you a quick kiss and then pulling you into another hug.
**
With happy and full stomachs, the two of you went to bed after watching a few episodes of The Office.
It was such an exciting day that you were finding it hard to sleep. First, the guy you were seeing was in town, not only in town, but in your house. Secondly, you got a new job. Not only was it something new, it was a change that would fulfill that part of your life completely. Thirdly, you were able to stay on with the paper, keeping your credentials to attend media events of your choosing. It was like you won the happy life lottery today.
After tossing and turning for another hour, you got out of bed, threw open your door, and walked with determination down the hall. Stopping in front of Chris’ room, you knocked on the door quietly. If he didn’t answer, you’d just go back to bed and watch TV.
Maybe Scott’s still awake.
Before you could turn around and go back to your room, the door opened.
“Sweetheart, everything alright?”
“Ye-yeah. It’s just. Okay, you know.” You let out a breath as Chris looked on, arms folded across his chest. “This is silly. Will you come sleep with me?’
He chuckled light, sleepy grin on his face. “Yeah. I can do that.”
Just because you weren’t ready to jump back into an intimate relationship, it didn’t mean you couldn’t snuggle and sleep in the same bed.
“Let’s go to bed sweetheart,” Chris said, gesturing toward your bedroom door.
Chris pulled the covers back on the side you didn’t sleep on and laid down on the bed. This was the first time Chris had slept in your bed, and you couldn’t deny you liked the look of it. Crawling in next to him, you turned off the lamp on your nightstand and snuggled up on his chest.
“Goodnight babe,” you said softly.
“Goodnight beautiful.”
Chapter 13
**
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bbugyu · 5 years ago
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my happiness + lee jihoon
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even in this maze-like world, jihoon made you feel a little less lost
wc.4563 | fluff, uni/hs au, gender neutral reader, seungcheol is a protective bigbro
my friend ulted jihoon recently, so <3
If there was one way to describe your brother, it was protective. You were always his baby growing up - an annoying little sibling, but he was the only one allowed to beat you up. When your neighbor made you cry when you were six, a ten year old Seungcheol went marching over to him at the park near your apartment complex and kicked over his sand castle. In hindsight, he might have been a bit of a bully, but only when other people hurt you first, and you had always been grateful for it as a child.
Now, though, it scared you. Because you had a boyfriend. And Seungcheol didn’t know.
Seungcheol had gone off to college, getting an education doing what he loved with a ton of friends. He lived in an apartment an hour bus ride away from your family home, where you spent the week in high school. 
On the weekends, though, you had free reign. And most weekends, you took that hour bus ride to spend a couple nights on the couch in his living room. In the beginning, it had been because adjusting to him being gone was hard for you. For the first 18 years of your life, you had spent the evenings playfully fighting with your older brother as your mom yelled for you to sit your asses down and eat. Now, you sat at the table and shoved your food around the plate, feeling like an only child. Seungcheol knew this, and had opened the invitation - whenever you had a hard week, you were welcome, no questions asked. As long as there was a confirmation before you got on the bus, he would happily meet you at the bus stop and buy your favorite ramen and ice cream at the convenience store on the walk back to his place.
Now, though, you went just to hang out. His roommates were fantastic, a group of music-making friends Seungcheol had made in his course, not to mention the rotating cast of friends that would show up unannounced or to work on music. They were somehow just like him, yet simultaneously so different. You felt the same older brother vibe from Jeonghan that you did your actual brother. He took care of you, tossing you a tangerine when you were starting to get hangry, or sneakily adding your favorite songs to the music queue when you were pouting about something you didn't want to talk about. He lounged on the couch with a look on his face that made you wonder if his eyes ever opened fully, yet he noticed everything. Sometimes, when you were mad at Seungcheol for indescribable sibling reasons, Jeonghan would shoot you a message on kakao, and you would jokingly tell him he was better than your real brother. He always scolded you for thinking so, but it was his own fault for being so understanding.
Soonyoung and Seungcheol had the same way of expressing their passion, diving head first and only coming up for air when they were done. You had watched Soonyoung shove the small table in their apartment against the wall so that he could use the giant mirror leaning against the wall to bang out a detail in his choreographies more than once, and you recognized the look on his face as the one Cheol had as he wrote. He made you laugh the most often, always sacrificing his image to commit to a joke. The way he could transform from a striking performer into a grandma at a moments notice was maybe one of your favorite things anyone has ever done, but you refused to give him the ego boost by telling him, even if your uncontrollable laughter gave you away anyways.
And then there was Jihoon.
Jihoon was quiet and thoughtful, like your brother. He seemed to do better assessing the situation completely before inserting his opinion, which was always well considered and well explained. He leaned back in his roller chair, hand on his chin as he listened to the opinions of his room and bandmates, then somehow managed to have a suggestion that solved all their disagreements. He dressed comfortably at all times, but the clothes suited him well. You cursed him for being able to look put together while wearing sweats and sandals, all his platinum blonde hair tucked into a hat. At first, you wondered if he didn’t like you, considering how close you had gotten to the other two, but when you asked Seungcheol what his deal was, he just told you he’s shy around new people. That didn’t stop you from crushing on him. Hard.
More than once, he had looked over at you, catching your starry eyed gaze while he was working on a beat. You would always blush and look away, mortified by being caught practically drooling, but you noticed that when you stole another look, he was blushing too.
Seungcheol always grilled you about the boys at school. He always made you promise that you wouldn’t go on any dates with any of them before getting his approval, and you sighed and agreed, thinking specifically about how he had said “high school boys aren’t worth your time.”
Jihoon had been around for a couple of these conversations, and while he always stayed seated, facing his computer and away from you, you could see his fingers falter over the keyboard, his creative function pausing as he heard you insist to your brother that none of the guys at your school interested you.
One weekend, you were cramming for an exam, seated on the floor and laid out on the table at the apartment. Around 2 in the morning, Seungcheol told you to not stay up too late, told Jihoon that if he kept you up he would end up dead, then retired to his bedroom. You had yawned once in the half hour since then, and Jihoon immediately spun around in his chair, tearing off his headphones.
“I should let you sleep,” he said, saving his files. 
“No, no,” you insisted. “I’m gonna be up for at least another hour, don’t stop working for my sake.”
Jihoon pursed his lips, a habit you had noticed in the time you had known him. He nodded, acknowledging that he trusted your judgement and that he could keep working as he spun around slowly to resume. You watched his profile a moment, noticing the way his eyes scanned his screen while he was frozen, seemingly lost in his own brain versus processing what he was viewing.
“Can I hear what you’re working on?”
He blinked at you hard. “Hah?”
You giggled, trying to keep quiet, knowing his roommates were all asleep. “Can I listen? It might give me strength to keep studying.”
“I-I, uh-” Jihoon stuttered for a moment, clicking around on his screen. “Y-yeah, one second-”
Your lips pursed to hide the creeping smile on your face. Seungcheol had told you ages ago that Jihoon never went on dates. You had slept over at the apartment when Soonyoung had come home late after nights out, or Jeonghan not returning until morning. You had even stayed home a few weekends for the express reason of letting your brother go on dates without worrying about you being at his place alone. Jihoon, though. He was always home, either sleeping or working. You wondered if he even went to class. It was hard to imagine him anywhere but his desk in the living room.
You crawled over to the desk from you spot on the floor, and Jihoon stood up as you got near, gesturing for you to take his seat. As you sat, he handed you his headphones and kneeled, hand on his mouse as you put them on. He looked at you briefly to make sure they were on the right way, then hit the spacebar on his keyboard.
As the beat started, you immediately smiled and let out a small “ooh,” turning to Jihoon as he tried to look anywhere but at you. Your head bobbed as you listened to the cheerful beat. “I love it. What melody are you thinking?”
He cocked his head. “I haven’t gotten that far. Cheol already wrote a few bars, so I made it for that mostly, but I don’t have a hook yet.”
You nodded, humming a quiet accompanying melody absentmindedly.
“Oh,” Jihoon said, suddenly looking at you. “That’s good? That was really good. Hang on.” He paused the playback and grabbed the microphone, and you watched in shock. “Can you do that again?”
“I-I, me?” You gulped. “I’m not a singer, you should do it.”
“You came up with it, how am I supposed to know it?” He asked, clicking around quickly. You leaned back in the seat as his arms reached across you to access the keyboard better. “You should record it, quick, before you lose it.”
You stared at the microphone he put in your hand as he went back in the song to where you ad-libbed, still slightly shocked at the difference in Jihoon’s personality when he started entering producer mode.
“Ready? Just do it naturally. Whatever feels right.”
You looked at him, nodding. The music resumed in your ears, and you sang the melody you had hummed into the microphone with no real lyrics. When you finished what came to you, you pulled the microphone away from you, giggling suddenly. “This is so embarrassing.”
“Why, why?” Jihoon took the mic from you and smiled, after saving the recording. “You sounded good! The Choi siblings are talented.”
“No,” you groaned. “Seungcheol got all the musical talent.”
“Yah,” he furrowed his brow at you. “Are you saying I’m not a good judge?”
You laughed again. “No, no, I’m not!”
“It sounds like you think I don’t know a good voice when I hear it.”
“Stop!”
“Then admit you sounded good!”
You pouted at him, and he laughed. Your frown broke slightly, only to end in you giggling as he looked back at his screen, adjusting a couple things. You wanted to watch what he was doing, but you were lost in his profile. He gave you a sideways glance quickly, then again when he realized you were staring.
“What?”
You shook your head, but didn’t stop looking at him. “Nothing.”
This was the closest you had ever been to Jihoon, sitting in his chair with him beside you, and your heart felt like exploding just by the way he was looking at you.
Then you heard a door.
Jihoon stood suddenly, instinctively clearing his throat and focusing on the screen as you spun in the chair to see Jeonghan emerging from their shared bedroom.
He paused outside of the door, staring at the two of you, processing the scene he had just walked into. “What’s all this?”
You blinked, and Jihoon cleared his throat again.
Jeonghan sighed, grabbing his jacket off the back of the couch. “You guys are too obvious.”
“Where are you going?” You asked suddenly, remembering the hour.
He eyed you, knowing what you were thinking. “Nothing like that. My girlfriend just accidentally played Animal Crossing for ten hours straight and has an exam in six hours. I’m taking her to a cafe.”
You nodded slowly, remembering the girl you had met a few weeks before, then wondered what class has an exam at 9 on a Saturday. “Stay safe.”
“I should be saying that to you.”
“Hey,” Jihoon said, feeling accused. “What’s that mean?”
Jeonghan laughed as he grabbed his wallet and keys, shoving them into the pockets of his denim jacket. “You do know that Seungcheol will literally kill you if you make a move on his baby, right?”
You bit your cheek. Jihoon stuttered behind you.
“I’ll keep your secret,” he said, shoving his feet into a pair of vans. “But if you guys are this obvious in front of him, don’t blame me when he finds out.”
It had been a month since Jeonghan had called you both out for having feelings for each other. A month since Jihoon shyly admitted that he had liked you for a while, but hadn’t expected you to feel anything for him. A month since you, a blushing mess, said that you had a crush on him the second you met him. A month since he gently put a hand on your jaw and kissed you.
A month since you started avoiding your brother’s questions about boys. And he was starting to get annoyed.
“None, Y/N? Really? No guys?”
You rolled your eyes, pausing your note taking. “No, bro. Boys at my school are stupid.”
“What about outside of school?”
This was the first time Seungcheol had suggested that you might know people outside of your class, and your panic must have shown on your face by the way Jihoon snorted from behind Cheol. He spun around and looked at the younger. “What? Is it crazy to think that Y/N might know people outside of school?”
“No,” Jihoon said, straight faced. “I just don’t get why you’re so insistent on them having a boyfriend when you wouldn’t approve of any of them anyways.”
You chewed the inside of your cheek, refocusing on your textbook. “Can you guys shut up, I have a quiz on Monday.”
“You have all weekend,” Cheol said, grabbing your notebook as you protested. “Whats up, my precious little sibling. Why aren’t you dating? You’re graduating this year.”
“Because I have an oedipus complex and no one compares to my brother,” you said, trying to snatch your notebook back as Jihoon broke out into a laugh. “Can you leave me alone for one weekend?”
“If you want me to leave me alone you shouldn’t come to my apartment.”
You didn’t tell him you only came because you wanted to see your secret boyfriend, who just so happened to be his roommate.
Jihoon was good to you, you thought. If he woke up early enough, he would facetime with you during your lunch period at school while he walked to his first class, bleary eyed and swollen from sleep. You shoved your classmates away as they teased you for your older man and he would just laugh, rubbing his eyes in the afternoon sun. He’d send you pictures of random things all day, sometimes in class, or in the library. A book cover he thought you would like the design of. The way the clouds looked in the sunset when he was walking back to the apartment. You often got selfies of him pretending to be asleep during lectures. You would send pictures back of your sneakers while you walked home from school, or selfies you took with the mirror in your room. Every other afternoon, he would facetime you again after Seungcheol left for his afternoon class, and you would study while he messed around on his computer, letting you listen to his music making process.
Then, Friday afternoons, you would skip up the stairs to your family apartment and rush to pack an overnight bag, telling your mom you were headed to Seungcheol’s. She would tease you for spending more time there than at home, but was secretly glad that her kids were staying close. On the bus, you would switch your wallpaper back to an edit with lyrics to some Jonas Brothers song from the picture that Jihoon had sent you earlier that week. You texted both Jihoon and your brother, separately, letting them know you were on your way.
Your phone rang in your hand suddenly while you were watching Jihoon type on the other side of the conversation. Seungcheol. 
“Hello?”
“Hey, kiddo! Something came up and I can’t get you at the bus stop.”
You paused. “Okay?”
“So wait until later.”
You paused again, looking around the bus you were seated in. “No?”
“What do you mean, no?”
“Seungcheol, I’m not a little kid. I know where you live. Besides, I’m already on the bus.”
You rolled your eyes when you heard him groaning. “You’re so annoying. Okay, hang on.”
“You’re the one being annoying, bro-” you were cut off by the sound of a door opening and Cheol yelling a sustained “YAH!”
“Can you go get this stupid kid at the bus stop? By the 7eleven?”
“Bro, I’m not a stupid kid-”
“Okay I’m back. Jihoon says he’ll come meet you.”
You paused. “Fine.”
“Ah, you’re fine if it’s Jihoon but not me. I see how it is.”
You laughed. “What do you mean?”
“This kid,” he muttered teasingly. “Doesn’t even care that their big brother just wants to take care of them. Prefers the other brothers. I get it. I’m not hurt.”
“Shut up,” you laughed. “I’ll see you later?”
“Yeah whatever. Love you!”
“Love you, too.”
Then you sat, vibrating, on a bus for forty-five minutes. 
You stood by the back door as the bus stopped in front of the 7eleven, grinning when you saw Jihoon leaning against the wall, waving at you through the bus window. You hopped off and excitedly skipped towards him, making him laugh as he pushed off the wall.
“Hi,” you said, grinning.
“Hi,” he said back, quickly leaning into you for a kiss.
You really cherished the moments you could act how you wanted with Jihoon. You knew that if you let yourself get soft and sappy with Seungcheol around, it would be a dead giveaway, so you kept your normal attitude at the apartment. But, what you wanted to do was hook your arm into Jihoons, plant a kiss on his cheek, and happily tell him about your week as you walked. So that’s what you did.
Despite the fact that you had talked over facetime the day before, you still found something to tell him about, making him laugh when you imitated one of your classmates. He told you that he started a new song the night before, and you begged him to let you listen to it when you got home, but he said you had to wait until it was done.
Your fingers fit well between his, you thought, when he suddenly asked if you were hungry.
“Kinda,” you said, looking over to him. “You?”
He nodded, looking down the street at what was around. “I haven’t eaten yet today. Do you wanna go to the snack bar?”
You grinned, giving him a look. “Lee Jihoon, are you asking me out?”
He laughed, tugging your hand with his. “Shut up. Let’s go.”
You decided to let it slide that it was almost four in the afternoon and he hadn’t eaten yet, giggling as you got pulled down the street. You had always liked Jihoon, obviously, but you especially liked the Jihoon you had gotten to know. The one that was relaxed and laughed at every chance he got, rather than the shy and hesitant Jihoon you had met. Now that he wasn’t trying to hide his feelings from you, he had become a cooler, calmer version of himself when you were around, not just when he forgot you were sitting on the couch while him and the guys worked on a song. 
When you entered the snack bar that your group frequented often, you realized you had never eaten anywhere alone with Jihoon, much less there. It was starting to kind of feel like a real date, you thought, as he led you to a small table, looking over the menu when he sat despite probably having it memorized. You quickly got up and retrieved a pitcher of water for you both, asking him what sounded good.
“Everything,” he said, leaning back and stretching his shoulders. “What do you want? My treat.”
You bit your cheek, looking at the menu, despite also having it memorized. It really was starting to feel like a date. “Rabokki?”
“Oooh, I like it. With cheese?”
You scoffed, pouring the water for both of you. “Always with cheese.”
He laughed as he pulled the cap off a felt tip pen to mark out your order. “Do we want the fried rice at the end, too?”
“Wah,” you said, eyes wide. “I haven’t had that in so long. Are you hungry enough?”
He looked at you. “Are you being serious?”
You giggled, letting your hand find his free one beside the inset grill, fingers slipping between his. “Order it, then.”
He inhaled sharply, cocking his head at the menu. “Should we also get kimbap?”
“Jihoon, there’s only two of us.”
“And?”
He played around with the idea for a bit longer, making you laugh, but he decided against it so that he could justify ordering chicken for dinner. After the older woman that ran the place took the marked menu from Jihoon, he stared at you for a minute, then smiled.
You pouted, suddenly shy under his gaze. “What?”
“You’re really cute.”
You pulled your hand away from his and leaned back in your chair, crossing your arms. “Shut up.”
He laughed, leaning forward to pull your hand back. “Hey, hey! That’s mine. You can’t take it.”
“My hand?”
“No, mine.”
You held it up. “This one? The one attached to me?”
“Yeah, it’s mine. Give it back.”
You wished you didn’t blush so hard as you pouted and muttered a “fine,” letting him take it back and rest it on the table again. 
Then there was thunk on the window, making you both jump and look over, along with the few other patrons. Your eyes got big as your big brother pointed at you, a balled fist against the glass.
“Yah!” His voice was muted from through the glass, but his tone was obvious. You looked at Jihoon, then at your hands, and you both pulled away as soon as you realized, but it was way too late. You groaned and collapsed onto the table as Seungcheol marched to the entrance and entered the snack bar.
“What the hell! You didn’t tell me?”
Jihoon stood up, but stuttered. “H-hey, calm down, bro-”
“Y/N.”
You didn’t lift your head. “What.”
“Look at me.”
“No.”
“I’m sorry,” Jihoon interjected. “I asked them to not let you know. It’s my fault.”
“What?” Seungcheol stared at him. “Why? Why would you think I wouldn’t want to know about this?”
“Because you would have said I wasn’t good enough, and you’re right.”
That made you pop your head up, squinting at Jihoon. “What? No. That’s not true.”
“How can you judge?” Seungcheol asked, nodding at you. “You don’t have experience with guys. You barely even know him.”
You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Oh my God, Seungcheol, I’ve known Jihoon for almost a year now. I probably know him better than you do. And I don’t need you telling me who’s worthy of my time.”
Seungcheol pouted at you, his brows giving away that he was more hurt than angry. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
You paused. “Are you serious?”
He exhaled, sitting in the extra chair at your table, completely ignoring the group of people he had been walking with that were now just standing outside of the restaurant. “How long?”
You eyed Jihoon, who quietly sat across from you. “About a month.”
Seungcheol clicked his tongue, as he looked around, concealing a curse and clearly annoyed that he hadn’t figured out sooner. “How serious?”
“I really like Y/N,” Jihoon said, pulling both of your attention. He adjusted his baseball cap, another habit of his you had noticed. “A lot. I would like it to be serious.”
You pursed your lips, trying to hide a smile. “Me too.”
“God, I hate this,” Seungcheol said, rubbing his face. “This sucks so much.”
You shoved his shoulder. “Why, why?”
“Because I want to beat up your boyfriend but I don’t want to beat up my producer.”
“Nice,” Jihoon deadpanned, looking at you with a raised fist in victory. “We found a loophole.”
You couldn’t help but laugh as Seungcheol groaned, pulling himself out of the chair. “Are you paying? You better be paying.”
Jihoon laughed, hands up in surrender. “I’m paying, I promise.”
“He already offered, Seungcheol, seriously. God, you’re so annoying.”
“I can’t believe I’m leaving you two here.”
“Are you?” You asked. “Because it seems a lot like you’re still here.”
“Oh, nice,” Jihoon raised a hand and you laughed as you high fived him. 
“I’ll kill you both if given the opportunity, I swear,” Seungcheol said, walking towards the door. “Take me seriously.”
“Of course, big brother! I love you!”
Jihoon made a heart with his arms and you held your face, trying to not snort at the way Seungcheol pointed and looked at him. 
“God, this sucks,” he repeated before opening the door, sounding completely defeated. "Oh my God the song you were writing yesterday-”
Jihoon cleared his throat. "Hey, bro, shut up."
You eyed Jihoon and he shook his head. Seungcheol leaned against the doorframe in anguish, still complaining about how much he hated the situation. You waved to him as he rejoined his friends, all of them slapping his back as he huffed. You exhaled deeply and looked at Jihoon. “Well, that went better than expected.”
He exhaled, nodding, rubbing his hands on his thighs. “I think I saw my life flash before my eyes.”
You giggled a moment, then paused. “Were you serious earlier?”
Jihoon looked at you, wide eyed. “About what?”
“That you don’t think you’re good enough.”
His tongue clicked and he inhaled, fidgeting with his hands. “I- yeah. Kinda?”
“Why?”
He shook his head. “I just don’t get you.”
You frowned. “What?”
“I don’t get how-” he paused, clearing his throat and straightening his spine. “I don’t understand it. You’re so funny and cute and smart, I’m sure people are asking you out at school all the time. Wouldn’t it be easier to have a boyfriend you could actually spend time with?”
“We do spend time together,” you said, thinking of all the video calls and the weekends hanging out.
“Not really,” Jihoon said. “Not like a couple.”
You faltered. “You mean like going out?”
He pursed his lips, clearly not sure how to express what was going on in his head with you pushing for an answer. “I guess? Don’t you think you should see your boyfriend more?”
“Yeah, of course,” you said, trying to get him to look at you again. “But only because you’re my boyfriend. I like you, Jihoon. I don’t wanna be with anyone else.”
He sniffed suddenly, a smile breaking through. He raised his eyebrows a bit, and you almost laughed at his playful look. “You don’t wanna be with anyone else?”
You giggled. “No. Only you.”
“Wow,” he said, putting his hands on the table. “No one, huh?”
“Shut up,” you said, recognizing his jokingly cocky tone.
“Wow, this feels good, huh?” He grinned, committing to the bit by speaking in dialect. “I like this feeling. Turns out, happiness isn’t just a word.”
Your eyes closed as you laughed. “You’re acting so weird, stop.”
He laughed with you while your pot arrived and the server turned on the burner. Jihoon immediately began breaking up the ramen, smiling sideways while you watched him.
“What?” He asked finally, wondering why you stared at him instead of the food.
You smiled. “I like you.”
He exhaled with a smile. “I like you, too.”
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sif-the-tsunami · 4 years ago
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Ropes and Roses part six
Summary: Elizabeth Rosehill is a talented dance instructor and a force of nature that beguiles her famous student. Events in her life, however, have led her to search for more creative ways for her to keep herself afloat. What will she do to keep her dreams secure and what will it mean for her blossoming relationship. This is a very adult story about two people who are moderately terrible at adulting.
Warning: adult language, situations, arguing, less smut, more angst. If something in here needs a more descriptive warning I will gladly update it
Pairing: Henry and OFC (am I doing this right?)
Word count: 2K
A/N: If you read it and like it, it would mean a lot to me if you could say something nice! I have a lot of feelings this week that I’m trying to work through.
Henry woke up the next morning before Elizabeth. She was face down, her monstrous cat was curled up in a ball, snuggled up under her arm, gently purring. Alistair stared at him with his large green eyes for a few moments, fluffy tail flicking. The cat seemed to find him amusing at least. Looking around he saw a delicate crystal sun catcher dangling in the corner of her window. Tiny rainbows danced across the walls and ceiling as the sun rose. The woman in bed with him moaned slightly and moved herself on to her back. She opened her eyes briefly, smiled at him, then went back to sleep. Henry took a moment to watch her resting, peacefully exposed to his gaze. He rolled off from the bed from the other side. As the man left the bed, the cat seemed to relax more now that he was the only one in bed with his favorite human.
Henry did his morning ritual, and then started walking around her apartment while he waited for his lover to wake up. What was supposed to be her living room had book shelves on most of the walls that were crammed with different kinds of literature. She had one blank wall, but even on that one had a computer desk with two monitors, cat ear gaming head phones, and a keyboard that glowed different combinations of the rainbow while her computer was asleep. Taking a peek back at her room, Elizabeth was still asleep, he wiggled her mouse to see what kinds of games were on her desktop but her home screen was password protected. In a corner, there was a chaise lounge in a deep green velvet and a side table. No dining table or chairs, she probably ate at her computer, he thought.
Her kitchen was almost bare. One little table had a cat food bowl, the pantry had some basic staples but nothing that screamed out she hosted guests frequently. He found her coffee, and proceeded to brew a pot for them. He looked in the fridge for other breakfast foods, but he didn’t find much. He heard the thundering paws of Alistair come running to his feeding spot. The little predator noticed the light bouncing off of his watch.
“Oh, you like that, huh?” He watch as the cat chased the reflection. The two played together with the bright light, chuckling at the cats antics.
“You know, I could get used to finding you naked in my kitchen, Mr Cavill.” Her voice made him jump. “I’m sorry, I thought you heard me coming.”
She was standing in the door way wearing a loose fitting sweater. The sleep in her hair caused it to curl in every direction. The cat batted at her hand for some affection which she gave to him. He couldn’t stop staring at her again. This was the Liz he had been hoping to see, well rested and looking content with the world. She played with her kitty using the sleeve of her sweater. She asked him how he was doing after she caught him looking.
“Yeah, everything is fine. Just appreciating the view.” He said walking up to her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, reaching down to kiss her. “It’s Sunday, right? Do you want to go have brunch, I know of a couple places we can take Kal, sit on the patio.”
“Yeah, that sounds really nice.” She said between kisses.
“Go get dressed, we’ll have something delicious.” She came back when Henry was starting his second cup of coffee wearing a delicate pink dress with a light weight navy blue sweater. Her hair pulled back with some of her little curls falling down in the back. Henry had gotten into the clothes he had wore the night before and they made their way to his place. Kal had nearly tackled him when they had gotten there. Henry hurriedly cleaned up and dressed himself while Elizabeth sat on the couch to cuddle with Kal. He listened to her baby talk his dog. He was two seconds away from telling her they should just stay in and spend the rest of their time together for the day in bed. He wanted to learn every spot that made her gasp in delight.
When they finally made their way to the restaurant he had decided to put all of his cards on the table. He told her that he didn’t want to play games or hard to get. He wanted to get to know her and spend as much time as possible with her before he would have to go somewhere else to film on location. This would be the start of a fairly regular schedule they would stick to for the next two months. Thursday night he would take her out, they would spend time until it was time for her to get ready for her classes on Friday, Saturday he might watch her at the club or meet her afterwards, then Sunday they would have breakfast and part ways for a couple days to focus on work.
Soon the real world starting calling Henry back to it. They would call every night and, when they could, sneak in a few days away with each other. On one of their reunions, they hid away from their regular lives in a romantic cabin. He loved taking her to little hide a ways when he could. They would usually spend the entire time in bed with each other, nothing between them but their desires. He had looked forward to this all week and planned on making one of their favorite dinners that night to surprise her. However, when Elizabeth got out of the car, he could tell that she hadn’t been having a great day. The only thing she wanted from him right away was to be held and he willingly supplied her with affection. What started a hug turned into him carrying the woman he adored into the bedroom they would be sharing. She melted against him, but he couldn’t help but feel like there was something she was just not saying.
“Penny for your thoughts?” he asked after they had laid in companionable silence for a while.
“It’s nothing, I’m just pissed off about a conversation I had this morning with management. And one of my dance teachers tore he ACL so now we have to cancel all of her classes or I have to find a substitute teacher. I’m not sure which is better yet. If I have to teach it, that’s less time with you for the next six months.”
“I’m sorry, that does sound frustrating, but I’m not going anywhere. I can wait, your students need you. What was going on with the other problem?”
“Just some stuff with the Fox Catcher. I evidently am not drawing in the audience like I used to. They want me to do something different.”
“What kind of things are they suggesting?”
“They usually suggest two girls, which I’m fine with. Those nights always sell out, we might be able to market it as the subs are competing or whatever. But one of the owners came up with a completely idiotic idea. They want me to start dominating guys at least once a week.”
“No, out of the question.” He sat strait up. “I don’t care if you have to have sex with your girls on stage to get more asses in chairs, I’m not okay with you doing any of that with another guy.”
“What?” She was quite taken back by him.
“I’m dead serious, Elizabeth.”
“Henry, this is still just being thrown around right now.”
“And I’m telling you not to.” He pulled back further.
“But I can have sex with another woman? I don’t plan on fucking anyone else outside of this conversation, my dude. What kind of person do you take me for? And I really don’t appreciate you telling me that domming a dude is worse than having sex with someone who isn’t you. There is a reason I don’t go around doing either with just anyone.”
“You clearly get off on being a Dominatrix when you work with your girls, I have noticed a distinct difference in how you fuck me on the nights after your shows.” He cut her off. Fuck, Henry, what were you thinking. Her expression dropped. He rubbed his face, trying to think of anything he could say to fix it.
“Where is this coming from?” She asked, moving away from him on the bed, pulling her shoes back on. “You know what, no. I’m going for a walk so I don’t say something I regret.”
“Just say it!” He snapped, trying to get up to follow her.
“No, you need to calm down first. I will not be yelled at over something this fucking stupid. I haven’t even...”
“Damnit, Elizabeth! I..”
She hissed at him before he could finish his sentence with a level vitriol that he didn’t know she had in her. “I said no! I’m already having a bad day and this is why I didn’t want to talk about it tonight. Now I am going for a walk and you will sit down and think about how you want this conversation to go when I come back. We will talk like adults, you will not insult me again. Do you understand?”
Henry sat down again, completely taken aback, and nodded at her.  “Yes. Of course.”
“Yes, what?” Her eyes were looking glassy. He had accidently flipped her Domme switch, and he knew she didn’t enjoy using it outside of the club, but more importantly, he had know by now that she hated crying in front of anyone, especially him.
“Yes, Elizabeth, we will talk like adults, and I will not insult you again.” He tried to say it as evenly as he could.
“Thank you, now I’m going for a walk to calm down. Because, again, I don’t think either of us wanted this. I’ll be back.”
An hour later, he heard her coming through the front door.  She didn’t have the rage in her eyes like she did when she left which was a huge relief to him.
“Hey,” she said softly.
“Hey,” he waved at her from the kitchen. He came up to her slowly and held her hands in his. They were so cold. “I’m sorry. I overreacted.”
“So did I, I didn’t make it any easier on you.” She squeezed his hands. “I’m sorry.”
“I made dinner, if you’re hungry.” She nodded and he made her a plate of carbonara. She thanked him and they ate their dinner in silence.
“I think I know now what was making me so upset about the idea of you dominating another man. And I promise, I won’t yell this time.” He said after he had cleared their places.
“Oh?”
“I thought about it while you were out and I think I’m just worried that you will find someone who is into it, and you guys will, I don’t know, I’m going to sound like such a bastard saying this. I’m worried that you would leave me for someone who is more into that lifestyle than I am. I’m falling so hard for you, but you have this part of yourself that I’m not allowed into yet.”
“I hadn’t even considered that being part of the problem. When I go back, I will tell management that me performing with a man will not happen.” She reached her hand out to him and he held it. “I’m falling for you too. It’s not that you aren’t allowed to be apart of that side of me, I hadn’t seen any indication that you might want to. Is that something you want to try?”
“I don’t know yet.” Henry replied, running his thumb across the back of her hand. “But what I do know is that I have you for two more days before you head back to town, and I want to take you back to that very comfortable bed, and hold you against me until we fall asleep.”
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staticscreenwriting · 5 years ago
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12 Days of Christmas - [Day 8]
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A/N: Day number 8 for the Christmas coundown with @mattysheelies. Sorry it’s so late and out of order. I’m trying my best. I hope you guys understand. I also hope you enjoy ♥
Prompt: I’m not letting you barricade yourself in your room again for Christmas"
Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Reader
The movies lie. That’s a cold hard truth that Billy Hargrove has come to terms with a while ago. It becomes ever so clear to him again, as he watches Max and Susan cuddled up on the couch, watching some cheesy Christmas flick on TV. He hasn’t really been paying attention to the movie but it’s quite obvious it’s one of those generic Christmas films that pretend like snow is the best thing to happen to a person, especially in the month of december. The characters are all smiling and laughing and even if a problem arises, in the end it’s all gonna be alright. Because they have each other and the love they share for one another. Because family is the most important thing in the world and your family is always gonna love you.
And that, Billy knows for certain, is a big bunch of absolute bullshit. The last good Christmas he had was when mom was still living with them. Now it’s just a sad reminder of what his family should be, and what it most definitely isn’t. 
It’s not like he can really explain it to people either. His family celebrates Christmas and he does get presents, most of which he genuinely likes, but there’s always this invisible weight on his shoulders. Like he can’t really enjoy it because there’s always restrictions that come with it. It’s in the looks his father gives him when handing over a present. Neil never does anything without having ulterior motives. Every gift he’s ever given Billy has come with consequences. Neil is calculating. Scary.
Every gift handed over to his son is perfectly calculated. 
“We’re doing so much for you, Billy.”
“ We spent so much money on your gifts, Billy.”
“ Be a bit more grateful, Billy. “
“ This family is all you got, Billy “ .
Billy looks back towards the TV, the characters are singing now, holding hands around a Christmas tree. Then his eyes wander around the room. To Max who gives him a scowl as she sees him watching her. To Susan, who glances back and forth between the TV and the kitchen where a ham is roasting currently, afraid to overcook it just a tiny bit, afraid of the repercussions. To Neil who is leaned back on his recliner, feet resting on the coffee table, eyes halfway closed, snoring coming from his nose like the growl of a cave troll. 
This is nothing like the movies.
The phone ringing catches everyone’s attention, though Billy is sure it has the most effect on him. It makes his heart drop at the thought of who it could be. It’s the one thing that helps him get through the Christmas time. The one thought that help him get through — everything. That lets him know that he is never truly alone. There’s always gonna be one person who cares even if she’s on the other end of the country. 
He rushes towards the phone, picks up the receiver and, after taking a breath to calm himself down, he answers. “ Hargrove, hello ? “ 
The voice on the other end is not the one he so desperately wants to hear. A weird feeling is spreading through him, like someone is holding him under water or sitting on his chest, making it harder and harder to breathe. Like someone has reached into his chest and is holding onto his heart real tigh, squeezing it painfully.
Billy quickly turns his back towards the living room, knowing his face is probably betraying him, showing exactly what he’s feeling for anyone to see, anyone to judge — anyone to use it against him.
“ Max “ he croaks out, trying his best to keep all emotion out of his voice “ Sinclair wants to talk to you. “ 
Max takes the phone from him, eyeing him suspiciously. Almost as if she’s asking him if he’s okay, just without the words. All conveyed through a look. 
Truth is: No, he’s not okay. In fact, he doesn’t remember the last time he was properly okay. But this is not the place to show weakness or pain or heartbreak. Because there’s eyes and ears everywhere and they use those things against you. So he nods and walks back towards the couch. 
Neil is now leaning against the doorframe, self righteous smirk on his face like the villain in a Disney movie. “ Not who you were hoping for ? “ he snarls at Billy. 
There’s a sick satisfaction in his words, fully of malice. It’s as if he relishes in Billy’s misfortune. As if Billy’s pain brings him joy. 
“ I don’t know what you’re talking about. “ Billy replies before an arm shoots out, effectively stopping him from moving further into the room.
“ We both know that is bullshit, son. Don’t forget I’m the one paying the phone bill. I know you spent all of last Christmas on the phone to that — “ 
Billy’s hands curls up into a fist, his mind repeating a mantra over and over “ don’t call her names. Please don’t call her names. “ 
“ that girl. “ Even the way Neil says ‘girl’ gives Billy a sour taste in his mouth but at least it’s not some mean name. Billy wouldn’t be able to stand hearing his father call her any names.
“ She’s my friend. “ 
Neil scoffs, “ Yeah sure. Friend. “ 
Maybe he has a point. She’s more than that. She’s his constant. The only person who deliberately chooses to stay in his life, who makes an effort. The only person who doesn’t leave.
“ You really think whatever you two are doing has any future ? You still holding onto those silly dreams of going back to California and living that perfect little life with (Y/N) ? Let me tell you one thing, Billy “ Neil says then moves closer, lips right by Billy’s ears. With a low voice he speaks up again “ That is not going to happen. Never. Those are not the cards we Hargrove men are dealt. So you best start being grateful with what you have here, it’s all you’ll ever know. This is as good as it gets. “ 
And that, is exactly what Billy is so fucking afraid of. What if he’s right ? What is this really is as good as it gets for him ? 
He looks back towards the phone once again, Max having finished her phone call by now. It’s stays still, quiet. No calls. No calls. No calls.
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Billy sits on the steps of the front porch, cigarette dangling from his hand. From inside the house , the muffled sound of a Christmas song can be heard. 
As his warm breath creates little clouds in the cold winter air, Billy feels at peace for just a moment. Like he finally gets to breathe again. It’s fleeting and he knows that as soon as he steps back inside the feeling will be gone, so he cherishes it.
Across the street, through the window illuminated by Christmas lights, he catches a glimpse of his neighbours decorating their tree. Mr. Miller lifting their little son up to put the star on the top. Maybe, he thinks, some lifes can be like the movies. Maybe just not his in particular.
The Fletcher’s from next door pass by his house, mom, dad a kid and a dog. They all wear matching smiles on their faces. The way it should be. When they notice him, Mrs. Fletcher turns to her little daughter and whispers something in her ears. The little girl smiles even widers then hurries across the lawn up towards where Billy is sitting.
“ Merry Christmas “ she says, as Billy regards her with a look of utter uncertainty. 
“ Merry Christmas “ he returns then looks at the outstretched hand of the little girl. A gingerbread man looks at him with big gumdrop eyes. “ Is that for me ? “ 
The little girl nods “ uh-huh. Mommy and I made them for all our neighbours. “ 
The innocence and wonder in her voice, the kindness — it makes him remember the times when Christmas wasn’t but a day to remind him how lonely he actually is. It reminds him of when things were good and Christmas was something he was looking forwards to. 
He thanks the little girl and, as she runs back towards her family and gives him a wave goodbye, Billy can’t help but smile. 
A rumbling sound breaks through the peaceful evening, followed by two headlights illuminating the street. An ugly beige colored Mercury Cougar speeds up the street, leaving a trail of smoke in it’s wake. 
Billy stands up in a rush, his cigarette dropping onto the snow covered ground. It’s an ugly car. Probably the ugliest car he’s ever seen. It’s falling apart at every end. There’s half peeled off bumper stickers and a stuffed mickey mouse hanging from the front mirror. 
By all means, he should hate this car. He doesn’t though. Because it’s where he’s made some of his favorite memories.
In the matter of seconds, after the vehicle has stopped in front of his house, he’s off of the steps, across the lawn and by the side of the car. It takes but a blink of an eye for the driver to open the door and throw herself into his arms.
There are so many things he wants to say, so many thoughts running through his head. So many questions that need to be asked and yet, he stays quiet because — because she’s here and in his arms and that is all that matters. 
Snow is softly falling around them, resting on her hair like tiny little stars. It occurs to him in that moment, that he’s never kissed her in the snow. In fact he’s never even seen her like this before, snowflakes in her hair, the tip of her nose and her cheeks red from the cold.
“ You’re here “ 
“ I’m here. “ 
“ ‘s why you didn’t call. “ 
“ Yeah, sorry for keeping you waiting — surprise. “ 
He thinks she looks adorable with her rosy cheeks and her red nose and the beanie pulled down over her ears. He thinks she always looks adorable but this is a whole new look, one he never got to see in the years they grew up together in California. 
Holy shit, California.
“ Did you drive here ? “ 
“ Yup. “ 
“ In this weather ? Are you insane ? “ 
“ Worth it if it means I get to see you. “ 
He wants to cry. His heart feels so warm and happy and like it’s gonna jump out of his chest. And that kind of happiness is not something he’s used to dealing with. So his body immediately goes to crying. He doesn’t though. Instead he pulls her close and places his lips on hers. Even her lips are cold but who gives a shit. They still taste like her and feel like her and — and like home.
“ Get in the car, Billy. I have a plan for tonight. “ 
He doesn’t object. Getting away from this place, from Neil, even if it’s just for a night, sounds like the best way to spend Christmas Eve.
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“ Where are we going ? “ 
“ It’s a surprise. “ 
“ Alright, okay. “ Billy replies, raising his hands in defeat and leaning back in the worn out passenger seat. “ I still can’t believe you came all this way to see me. “ 
“ Look, Billy “ (Y/N) says and look away from the street for a second to lock eyes with him. There’s something in them, so gentle and genuine. Like all the answers to all the questions in the world are hidden right there in her eyes. 
“ Last year when we talked on the phone, it broke my heart. To know you felt lonely and sad, on Christmas of all days. It broke my heart, Billy. I knew your family was shit but at least in California we had each other. So that night I decided that this year was gonna be different. It’s all I asked for this Christmas. Gas money to come see you. I’m not letting you barricade yourself in your room again for Christmas ! “ 
Maybe this is what Christmas is really about, Billy thinks. Not the songs and the lights and the movies. And maybe that’s what the movies don’t tell you. That family isn’t always who you think it is, that it’s not created by bood, but by love.
Maybe being with the ones you love is what really matters.
“ I love you, (Y/N) “
It feels like the right thing to say. The only thing that perfectly conveys just how he’s feeling right now. The gravity of it all. Tonight. Her. Them being together. 
“ Of course you do, I’m fucking great. “ 
And though it’s not the answer he excepted, it’s a good one. A very (Y/N) kind of answer. By the way she smiles at him, cheeks blushed now from something other than the cold, he can tell what those words really mean.
“ Why are we in Loch Nora ? “ Billy asks as he looks out the window at the houses passing by, growing bigger and more elaborate with each one. 
“ You’ll see. “ 
“ Alright, just tell me how you know your way around Hawkins so well. “ 
“ Ah you know, “ she says and shrugs her shoulders nonchalantly “ I did my research. “ 
“ What, you read a book called the shittiest places in North America ? “ 
“ No. I asked around. It’s why I’m late. “ 
They drive around for a few more minutes before (Y/N) abruptly stops the car just seconds before turning the corner.
“ Why — “ 
“ Do you remember what we did every year around Christmas time ? “ 
“ Get drunk and have sex in front of your fireplace ? “ 
“ No you idiot. I meant driving around — “ 
“ Candy Cane Lane “ 
“ Candy Cane Lane, yeah. Do you remember the first time we did that ? “ 
He does. Not vividly but he does. They were just kids then and his mom had taken them to see some movie in the cinema. It was one of those nights where you’re so happy and drunk on life you don’t wanna go home. Neither of them wanted to go home. So mom took the long way home, all across town, to look at the Christmas decorations. They ended up on a Candy Cane Lane by accident. His mom turned up the radio that was playing some festive song. And they just drove up and down the street over and over again. 
“ My mom took us. “ 
“ Yeah she did and she — “ (Y/N) stops and takes a breath. Billy thinks he can notice her voice shake a little. “ — she stopped in the middle of the road. I mean there was no one there so it was alright but uh, she stopped. Then she looked at us and she smiled and said: this right here, the way you’re feeling in this moment, that’s what Christmas is. That’s what Christmas should feel like. “ 
She softly cradles Billy’s face in one of her hands and places a gentle kiss on his lips.
“ I want you to feel like that every Christmas, Billy. “ 
She pushed a button on the radio and some cheesy, pop-ish Christmas song sounds through the car on full volume.
As they round the corner, an ocean of colors greets them. Twinkling fairy lights cover every tree, there’s blow up Santas and Snowmen and light up Candy Canes the size of an man.
It looks like a scene straight from some Hallmark Christmas card. Not even Billy with his perpetual cynicism can deny that this is gorgeous.
He’s alive. He’s here, with the girl that he’s been in love with since he knew what love was. The girl that was his first everything. And she’s smiling and her eye shine in the twinkle of the lights. And life, for once, feels so sweet.
“ (Y/N) ? “ 
“ Hmm ? “ 
“ Let’s go home. “ 
Her face falls “ you want me to take you back ? “ 
Billy shakes his head “ No. I wanna go home. How would you feel about another road trip ? “ 
Smiles on their faces they drive up and down the street over and over again until their hearts are about to burst from all the love and happiness they feel. 
Later, as another Christmas song echoes through the car, Billy looks outside and sees them passing the “You’re leaving Hawkins” sign. And his chest feels like and the weight is lifted.
And he’s very much in love. Maybe the movies aren’t all wrong, maybe this is just the prologue for his story. And he main part is just now starting. It’s gonna be a happy one, he thinks.
“ Merry Christmas, (Y/N) “ 
“ Merry Christmas, Billy. By the way: I love you too! “ 
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@sebastiansloserclub​ / @killer-queen-xo​ / @william-hargroves​ / @billysgodcomplex​ / @daisyxbuckley​ / @allabouthargrove​ / @mcrmarvelloki​ / @charmed-asylum​ / @naiomiwinchester​ / @hargrovesprincess​ / @mystrangerfics​ / @teafrompari​ / @staybruuutal​ / @colourado​ / @higher-further-faster-bb​ / @ayybtch​ / @carlaangel86​ / @baebee35
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