#and like?? fuck man. ae get the part of the fandom that’s like ‘i don’t get why people write fics making stan and mabel play dd&md��
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ford: would you be interested in a dd&md campaign where nothing bad happens whatsoever
stan: what’s the fun in that?
ford: the escape from our chronic depression
stan: …can i raid a dragon’s hoard or somethin
ford: you can. you can even mock the dragon so hard it dies
stan: holy shit yeah i’m in
#one aspect of gravity falls ae’m iffy about: the way d&d is treated. rant incoming#it’s all math and rules and graphs and like ae get the whole point is that they shouldn’t mock dipper just for loving something they don’t#Mbut also like???#yeah no shit they’re not interested. you didn’t show them ANY of the aspects they might actually be into#where’s the crafting? the creating of characters? the worldbuilding? the harassing innocent npcs?#idk maybe ae’m inexperienced but ae have never seen a d&d campaign that uses fuckin graphs#because that’s NOT THE APPEAL ALEX.#the appeal is the escapism. it’s the being able to dive into a fantastical world#it’s the getting to defeat enemies. it’s the being the underdog. it’s the earning a victory. it is the friends we made along the way#and like?? fuck man. ae get the part of the fandom that’s like ‘i don’t get why people write fics making stan and mabel play dd&md’#‘they made it clear they don’t like it’#but damn it have you ever seen a fic like that that’s about the graphs and math and giant rule book?#hell most fics we’ve seen like that use homebrewed campaigns. as in ‘FUCK THE RULE BOOK WE DO THIS OUR WAY’#ae just. ae’m starting to understand why people don’t like that episode#what was the point? to not mock dipper anymore? we’ve had like three episodes about that already#they missed an opportunity to make an episode focused in bonding#an episode that could have explored ford and stan’s strained relationship more#because stan and mabel would have loved the creative aspects of d&d so much#mabel loves crafts! she would have had so much putting together little figurines or a set!#and stan- can you imagine how much fun he would have had with the npcs?#and with the creation of characters! he fuckin loves storytelling!!#ae’m. ae’m sad now. they had an opportunity to bring everyone together through a game that has something for each of them to love#and instead we got ‘we should stop bullying dipper for the third time’ and ‘you can tell they don’t like each other-#-because stan still won’t say ford’s name’#can you imagine if instead of ‘stan throws a hissy fit and nearly gets ford and dipper killed’ we got ‘ford and stan get REALLY into the ga#and their characters and situations start to get kind of personal’?#like! imagine if they had all gotten stuck in the game and the stans had to work together to save everyone#but they still have unresolved issues that they start to work through at the end and thus the episode ends with a hopeful note#like. they share a moment like in the finale when ford and stan smile at each other after the bus leaves#don’t tell us they got a ‘starting to communicate and resolve issues’ moment in the finale because that shit was rushed as hell
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jlf23tumble · 3 years ago
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Hi! I haven’t been up to date with fandom drama in a few years since I haven’t been active on tumblr, but I read your tags under the ripped jeans Harry post and you got me interested! Could you tell me something about what you’re thinking? What is Olivia doing that you think people should be happy about but are instead whining? what did Robbie Sheffield write? I may have left the larry part of the internet but they still haven’t left my brain 🌼🌞 have a nice day!
anon 2: Hiii :) I saw your tags on the post about Harry wearing jeans but I don’t understand the context for your tags??? I couldn’t find the post/person you were referring to, but could you please explain what you mean regarding this fandom being babies and the whole Olivia proxy/last album being about a break up ect.? Thank you!
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Lumping these together because they're both about my salty-ish tags from last night, a time that was so much quieter than today, weeeee! Sorry it's a bit late, *gestures toward work mail*, but it pretty much always applies, sigh. Those tags stem from some "get a load of THIS horseshit" posts that my brethren and I occasionally trade with each other, usually because we cannot BELIEVE people have the balls to post some of the most malicious, bitter posts you've ever seen, followed by something about how sad it is that fandom is so toxic these days (gotta say, eternal faves). I love these side convos (groupchats, even!) with people who similarly hate the aggressive misogyny in the 1D fandom, and because I follow just a small handful of people in that fandom who don't actively hate women (or feel the need to casually bash them along the way to celebrating their fave rich white man), I'm sometimes out of the loop when the biggies who tend to also be the worst offenders get a little frisky with it, which is why I love it when people send me posts that are the equivalent of "get a load of THIS horseshit"--the lorde provided yesterday! I'll put my unpopular opinions under the cut because it might get rant-y, and I've got tons of aes mutuals who are ????? and patient but probably ???? and patient only to a certain point.
So one of the things I find fascinating about lady-haters in the D fandom is that the vast majority of them seem to be l*rries who also seem to really love spending a lot of time and effort screaming about Eleanor, Camille, Olivia et al. about how they should act and what they should wear and how they should dance or not dance and how obnoxious they are and on and on and on AND ON, while ALSO screaming about how much they support closeted people, hashtag fuck Olivia, man, she's the real villain here! (Paraphrasing, but the #holivia tag on tumblr will give you a pretty nasty snapshot.) And the irony is that by dating Olivia or Eleanor, both these dudes get to write all these songs about a surface relationship that give a good hint about the one right below the surface through that female proxy--you know, because they aren't actually out and can't/won't. And if you're a l*rrie, I'd think you would WANT to see Eleanor around (whew, they didn't break up, even though they were "too young"!), ditto Olivia (whew, I'm ready for a lot of domestic shit about a long-term relationship!), but no, that's a transitive property dot that can't be connected because it means you gotta unclench and let a woman live. To wit: I was sent a post yesterday from one of the biggest lady-haters, saying something something about how Harry's going to have this super domestic album and THEY are taking l*arry's love and putting Olivia in Louis’s place! Outrageous! (Plus a string of tags foaming at the mouth about how awful Olivia is, don't worry, the replies/tags are even bigger yikes.) And it's like, well, YEAH. You should actually find that pretty awesome, in fact, it probably means your faves are still together--I mean, Fine Line has loads of major break-up vibes (in amongst self-discovery and acceptance), and Harry very publicly had a breakup with Louis's proxy on that one. Rob Sheffield's article promoting Fine Line basically promotes that break-up and ends on a real fucking OUCH moment where Harry and Anne are watching Fleetwood Mac singing Landslide, and he's mc-fuckin' losin' it, Anne's there comforting him, and if you're thinking that that moment is about Camille Rowe, uh, you ain't me, babe. (Clapback too for Rob being the one to write the iconic Louis is Lindsey, Harry is Stevie piece). Again, just my own onion, I tend to be okay holding more than one string in my hand (these two CAN break up and get back together, don't even get me started on babygate brainrot talk).
But I think my biggest issue with all of it is that for a lot of l*rries, you gotta be gold star or you're out (literally true in so many groupchats and discords): they've each only fucked one person, they've never broken up, never had a major fight, it's never been messy, never been open, listen, you bitch, they fought against the odds, and they won! And I don't doubt that they did, but this isn't AO3, so I also don't doubt that they might've fucked other people, broken up and gotten back together again, had some real messy stuff, most likely around being in an open relationship for a spell and dealing with unspeakable personal tragedy, in amongst regular human growth and discovery. That doesn't make them bad people, it doesn't mean they aren't back together (and it doesn't even mean I'm right, I'm just a rando who has my own opinions about people I don't personally know, just like everyone else), but there's this fandom naivety about it, big-time fingers in ears la-la-la-la, where you're a bad person for even thinking it, so any cognitive dissonance just gets transferred to the woman involved, woman = bad (I'm simplifying, maybe it's bigger than that, but it's interesting to see how some blogs can't fucking shut about it, whereas others go about their biz--blogs in larr nation, I mean). And that's totally baby behavior, well, toddler behavior. I think a lot of babies can actually go with the flow, it's toddlers who melt down if someone moves their blankie.
Anyway, I'm wandering away from my point, which is that bearding isn't a fucking crime, especially if you claim to support your fave (or for that matter, anyone in the closet--it's what it's, as Louis's chest so wisely tells us). Your guy doesn't want to be or can't be out right now, and that's fine! Makes sense! Makes a lot of fucking sense, actually, these fans are invasive, bro! I just wish that if people were so worried about the state of the larry union, they'd maybe chill out a bit about the women involved. Maybe stop being an asshole. Maybe stop giving women asinine names because you think it's cute. Maybe stop complaining that someone's a narse because they're always "flaunting" [checks notes] that they're dating the person everyone says they're dating, or thirsting or chasing clout or whatever it is that Olivia does that is so god-awful to you on a personal level that you spend your day focused on it. (My fave: people who say she's forcing her latest ig story on them, when they're the ones following her, pausin' that little story, takin' that little screenshot, adding arrows and circles and text that manages to trash her for botox [but not Harry], trash her for dancing as if she isn't aware that everyone's watching [but not Harry], then reblogging all that garbage nonstop--it ain't rocket science, bb, she's not the one putting it anyone's face, you're literally the one following her and doing all this work! Unfollow, and set yourself free!)
Ahem. Anyway, yeah, so that's me, wondering why people spend so much time hating on people who are literally giving you the proof that you seem to need, but shirts work, too, I guess! Harder to hate a shirt, or project your self-hatred onto it, maybe? Makes u think.
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ziracona · 2 years ago
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ♥️
Awww, thank you!
I don’t know how to answer this though. I mean, I think like everyone who knows me for fic knows me because of In Living Memory. Easily my most popular or influential work. I’ve written several other fics for DbD I really liked too, especially From the Earth of No Return, because I had to learn to write a dead language for that and it was insanely intensive and fun. But if I try to only pick one per fandom, ILM wins. It’s an ensemble cast kind of epic about Philip and the survivors attempting to escape the realm together. Lots about trauma and growth and healing and humanity and love. Really loved it. Got to do so much character work, and it really turned out in a way that made me happy. It’s a little bitter sweet, because I originally wrote it for someone it was finished too late for, but it makes me happy sometimes I hear someone say it meant a lot to them. Like organ donation for a story. That one will always be special for me.
The Nuclear Reaction wasn’t technically the first fic I wrote. I used to write AE’s for the Nancy Drew PC games, and I wrote one Heavy Rain fic on da fiction.net before it, but I still kind of think of The Nuclear Reaction as my first fic, because it was the first I’d tried to do that sort of long-form, and that makes it special in my heart. It’s a Fallout 4 fic about Deacon and Preston and the other companions working together to take down the Institute after Sole’s death, with some meta about video game play styles and my first work making my 3rd person narrator a specific character but not the ones doing things on screen being narrated, and exploring the role of the narrator a lot. I didn’t finish it, because back then I took a break to write ILM and got sucked into that, but I do intend to. It’s early and has typos and is so much from my heart. I really liked it. Also, we deserve more FO4 centered on Deacon and Preston having a relationship bc they didn’t get the chance in-game but by god those two would have been best friends given half a chance.
Weirdest one on this list, but I wrote some fic for this obscure as hell tumblr game like 12 people in the ND pc game fandom played. It was like the show Mafia but you made stories for it to fit ND characters into, and I got to run the like…4th? 5th iteration? And included elements of the card game mafia (like Dr. and Sherrif skills etc) hence mine was called WhodunnitMafia. We were all in college so it died a few rounds before the end, but I wrote a finale for my friend who had played the killer (and was fucking excellent at it) and it had spanned this…just enormous role play contained in many personal chats and live blogging events. Anyway, I wanted it to have /an/ end, so I wrote one as pros, and like, I don’t think even Austen (my friend) ever read /all/ of it, and it’s so niche only like 6 people in existence max would ever maybe be aware it existed and have any interest even maybe in readying it, but regrettably that niche thing I swear to god produced some of the single best writing I have ever done, so periodically I re-read my own stuff for mafia and go “holy shit this is amazing why the HELL did I use my best writing on something designed for literally an audience of ONE” and I suffer. Love it though. (Parts 2 and 5 are especially *cheff kiss* like not to toot my own horn but holy SHIT WHY DID I WASTE SOME OF MY BEST WORK HERE???)
God it’s hard to pick between my own writing. Like right this second, I’ve been doing shorter form Batman and Spider-Man stuff and I like both a lot because it’s what I’m super into right now, but they’re really short so does that count the same? I don’t know I liked one more than the other either. Ahhhhh I…guess I’ll say my Harvey Dent one makes the winning cut? Because of very personal reasons, and I wrote it with Chase who I’ve never written with before, but he did an excellent job and it was a very cool experience. Significant to me. No official name for it yet. It’s Batman, Catwoman, and Two-Face fighting someone with mental powers and ending up trapped on a mind plane, and mostly character and relationship exploration with the Harvey Boys/the personalities in Harvey Dent’s head all split up into their own bodies temporarily while on the mind plane.
I really like all my stuff, and I know I’ve kind of plugged my Heavy Rain and one of my DbD fics without ‘picking’ them haha. Uhhh. I’m very bad at choosing amongst my own works. I feel like I /should/ say The Kid, because it’s fun to write something so different, and I was in a really bad place when I started it, but I also want to give the fifth slot to Isolation, because I am proud to be looked on with solidarity by some and hatred by others for being a champion defense attorney for my client Michael Audrey Myers. That is technically kind of an official tie-in for ILM so it’s sort of on here already though? So I guess for variety and for the time I was told by someone the way I write Amadeus reminds them of Lestat, The Kid. Which is a FGO au fic, about an alternate timeline of events for Ritsuka and Dr. Archaman leading up to the events of the original Grand Order set of arcs, only things don’t go how they should. Ensemble cast, but the main two are Billy the Kid and Ritsuka. Very fun. And I really need to get back to writing it…
Anyway, thanks for asking! I’m bad at answering because I’m bad at favorites with my own work, but it’s still fun to talk about. : )
EDIT: AH! I forgot about Half-Life!! Ahhhh war is hell how do people pick favorites?? Im not gonna change my answers now but I do want to publicly apologize to Anna for that one
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gay-otlc · 4 years ago
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Keepers Of The Chaos (3)
Summary: Tam, Linh, Dex, Keefe, Biana, and Fitz are part of the tiny fandom for Keeper of the Chaos, and Tam and Linh’s podcast convinces some of their other friends to watch it as well. The group finds themselves strangely invested in this show, where students at Tumblr High School who work together to write about an elf named Sophia, cause incomprehensible chaos, and fight their rival Pinterest High School.
Content warnings: Cursing, religion (Jewish Vackers), and Amsterdam (just in case, I know that was stressful for some people).
Word count: 1621
Notes: Most of the episodes are just events stolen from Lynn's roundup, Dex's memes are here
(Read on AO3)
The life of an amateur meme maker on dumbles dot com was a strange one, that was for sure. After finishing xyr favorite show- Ze-Ra: Monaerchs of Powhir- for the third time, Dex had searched for another show to fill the void in xyr soul. Biana recommended this show called "Keepers of the Chaos" and described it to xem. Xe was doubtful at first, but after watching the first episode, xe was hooked.
Xe used to not have many friends at xyr school, so xe did what every neurodivergent queer teen would do- made an account on dumbles dot com. People seemed to like xem- or at least, they liked dizznee-plus's memes and edits of Ze-Ra characters. Even after Dex befriended xyr squish, Fitz, thons sister, Biana, and aer girlfriend, Sophie, xe continued making content on dumbles. Around that time, the Ze-Ra fandom started dying off, and xyr memes started getting fewer note
In a sudden, two am burst of inspiration, Dex made edits of some of xyr favorite characters, like Ref, Akki, and Rose, with their respective pride flags (all of them bi) over them, and captioned it "we must be gay." The post blew up, or at least, what could be considered blowing up in Keeper of the Chaos's tiny fandom, and that was how Dex found xyr calling as an amateur meme/edit maker for KOTC.
History had been repeating itself, with the KOTC fandom starting to die off, until it was revived by an announcement from creator Saturn Nolastname- a season two would be released soon. Frantically, Dex made a meme about season one episode two, with the car salesman meme. Xe edited "chaos keepers" onto the car salesman, "the rarelynoticed" on the car, and "this bad boy can fit so many stripper outfits into it."
That had been... an interesting episode, to say the least. The chaos keepers had been talking about the antagonists of "Sophie and the Dark Duck"- a rebel group called the Rarelynoticed. In the information packet they'd been given, it was confirmed that the Rarelynoticed wore black cloaks and armbands, but no other clothes had been mentioned. Somehow, the chaos keepers came to the conclusion that the Rarelynoticed really wore neon pink leotards and green stripper heels, then drew this idea.
Needless to say, the Tumblr staff did not let them write that into the book. Nor did Lynn, the unofficially chosen leader of the group. Unfortunately for her, this didn't stop the chaos keepers from drawing more of these- or the fandom from making a ton of memes. In addition to the car salesman meme, a post with Drake saying no to "wearing normal fucking villain outfits" and yes to "leotards and stripper heels" gained popularity within the small fandom.
Though nothing could match the absolute shock of seeing the Rarelynoticed stripper outfit for the first time, Dex decided to rewatch the episode anyway- it was funny to see the chaos keepers freak out, and maybe xe could get some good screen captures. The good Saturn Nolastname indulged xem, and xe captured an excellent scene of most of the chaos keepers either laughing or screaming at the Rarelynoticed stripper outfits, with Kimber- one of xyr favorites- sitting on the side, explaining to Juno and Kaitee why Bianca Cracker was bisexual.
Xe went over to dumbles, posted the picture, added an image description, and captioned it "Live photo of me not caring when my friends talk about sex/romance." Xe chuckled to xemself- this really was how it felt to be aroace. Xe tagged it as aromantic and asexual as well, since dumbles added flag colors. Smiling, xe went to go check xyr notifications.
Xyr jaw dropped when xe saw that @lordofthesnuggles- Fitzroy (Dex didn't know thons middle name) Vacker thonself had liked and reblogged all three of xyr memes, even adding compliments in the tags! Xe'd had a bit of a platonic crush on Fitz for... a really long time, but xe always felt too awkward to talk to thon, so it was nice to see that thon appreciated xyr humor.
Feeling energized- and excited to procrastinate on xyr math homework- Dex went to watch the next episode: Dark Duck Is Jewish Now. Being Jewish xemself, this was a really funny episode to xem.
Lynn had been writing a sort of spinoff- it would be called fanfiction, but it was for her own story- about some of the Dark Duck characters celebrating Christmas, and added a throwaway line about Bianca and Finn Cracker celebrating Hanukkah. Then, her fiance, Shai, had taken that idea and run with it, writing a list of ideas about what would happen if the Cracker family was Jewish. Hir friend Sam had jumped on the idea, and soon they had abandoned writing the actual Dark Duck in favor of writing a story about Jewish Dark Duck characters. Some of the other Jewish chaos keepers, like Ref and Cat, helped out.
To be honest, it kind of surprised Dex that no one had made a joke about the Jewish Crackers just being matzah, so xe supposed xe would have to be the first.
Xe posted that observation, quickly getting a like from Fitz- which made xem smile. After a few minutes, Dex posted another meme: Shai and Sam standing in front of a door with a sign that read "elves don't have religion," and them saying "This sign won't stop me, because I can't read!"
It was accurate.
While that episode was great for Jewish representation, and funny, the Banana Noir episode was just plain weird.
It focused less on the Dark Duck than most of the other episodes, and was more about the crazy interactions of the chaos keepers. The episode was named for Banana Noir, who was really Cat Noir, but in a banana suit. Banana Noir was the son of Mellie, who looked like a shark, and Nora, who had platonically married faer. The mothers tried to arrange a marriage between him and Akki, who loved the side characters of the Dark Duck series. However, Akki wanted to marry Amelia. After a lot of shit that basically no one understood, Banana Noir's attempts were thwarted, and Lynn officiated the wedding between Akki and Amelia.
Yeah, Dex had no idea what the fuck was going on either. Xe'd watched an episode of Twins of the Chaos and a youtube video by arsonpog analyzing the Banana Noir chronicles, as it had been dubbed by the chaos keepers, and both expert opinions seemed to agree that Saturn Nolastname and the rest of the writers had probably been on crack when they made that episode.
The next episode made slightly more sense, though it was a low bar. After taking a break from the "official" Dark Duck story, the chaos keepers began collectively writing a Cinderella story about the characters Sophia and Bianca. People weren't allowed to be queer in the official story, but the chaos keepers still wanted to have fun with their obviously gay characters.
Even to the viewers of the show, who only received secondhand information about the Dark Duck characters, knew there was no way any of them, let alone all of them, were allocishet. The exact identities weren't entirely clear- when Dex had made edits of the characters' official art and xyr headcanons for their pride flags, a few people had disagreed- but both the chaos keepers and the fandom knew that despite what Shannon said, Sophia and Bianca were in love, and their Cinderella story should have made it in to the official Dark Duck story.
While excerpts of the Cinderella story were quoted in the show, most of it was left unclear, so Biana had taken it upon aerself to write aer own version of it. Dex was expecting an update later  that day, actually, or maybe the next. Ae wasn't always 100% reliable with aer update schedule. Still, Dex looked forward to when it eventually did come.
After the brief calmness from the Sophianca Cinderella episode, season one episode six, Amsterdam, exploded back into chaos. A few of the chaos keepers decided to discuss a fake scene in the book in which crazy shit went down, with the scene supposedly being located in Amsterdam. It had never been written and was never going to be, but everyone discussed it like it was real. Some of the highlights involved all the Dark Duck girls having swords (and the chaos keepers being gay for them), and a speedboat chase scene through the canals. Fitz had a popular theory that the chaos keepers would actually travel to Amsterdam in order to commemorate this crazy part of their lives. Almost as popular as that was a meme Dex made, with a man labeled "chaos keepers discussing amsterdam" and gesturing feverishly to a wall covered in papers and red string.
Of course, episode seven (Dark Duck Disney) was chaotic too. Everything was chaotic with this group, it was in the title. Shannon announced that the winning Dark Duck story would be adapted into a Disney movie. After past experience with terrible book to movie adaptations, the chaos keepers panicked. They panicked so much that it became major news within their school, which until then, had been largely ignoring the chaos keepers. Once the discussion about the movie settled down, they talked a lot about how in awe they were that their Dark Duck shenanigans were trending within the school.
But of course, none of that compared to the last episode of the season...
Dex changed xyr profile picture to include an ominous pair of teal eyes and sighed.
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that-milo-kid · 3 years ago
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Day 7: PTSD
Warnings: a corpse is spoken about in detail, blood is mentioned and there is swearing
Fandom: none
Word Count: 912
Characters: none - this story is written from a second person pov
Notes: this is entirely based off my personal experiences, because i didn’t know what to write for today. i dont have ptsd however i experience some similar symptoms, so thats mostly what i based this on (ALSO IRLS IGNORE THIS DAY LOL PLEASE DONT READ THIS)
this is a combination of a vent post and a practice at second person narration
You can still see him when you close your eyes.
Lying on the sidewalk, one arm bent at an unnatural angle, so covered in blood and bruising that he hardly seems recognisable. Not that you would be able to recognise him anyway – you didn’t really know him, after all.
He lies there, and an EMT standing beside him drapes a white sheet over his body and it feels like the sirens enter your head and make a home in your memories, in your thoughts. There are two cars pulled up beside him, one blue and one white, and there’s a blonde woman. You think she’s crying, but you can’t be sure.
And then you're gone, your car flying by with the wind and you’re just one of many, many citizens taking the motorway on a Friday afternoon. Your dad is sitting in the seat next to you, and his music is playing almost loud enough to drown out the sirens and he’s saying something mut you can’t  really hear him, can’t really understand what he’s saying.
You think it’s something about your brother. You don’t think it really matters either way.
The ride home is a blur, but then again, most things ae after that afternoon. You get home and your mother is there, yelling, because you shouldn’t be so cavalier and calm about death. Its cruel, its inhumane, and you’re reminded of a conversation you had with her recently about something else where she said the same thing. You wonder if she realises that she repeats herself so often.
You leave, eventually, because you have things to do and your mother has things to do and your dad left ages ago – maybe hours or minutes or even seconds. He leaves. You don’t notice anymore.
You're surprised when you get to your room, by how little you feel. You saw a corpse. The corpse of a man who was somebody’s father, somebodies son. A best friend.
Maybe it was normal. But you think about how your mother reacted to your indifference earlier, and you wonder if maybe you’re broken. How fucked up is it that you saw a dead man, and the worst part for you is that your mother’s upset with you?
You get your things, and you get in the car – not the truck, not with the loud music and the sirens and the
You get in the car.  You drive down the motorway, and you don’t look don’t think don’t feel when you drive past the sidewalk.
It’s on the radio that afternoon. A horrible accident, a hit and run that supposedly ‘left onlookers scared and traumatised’. You wonder if you’re one of them. None of the big news channels that night cover it. You hear about an armed robbery in America. You hear about how the stock market is fluctuating. There is no mention of the man in your neighbourhood that was killed.
You wonder why.
Day pass, and then months, and then it’s a new year entirely and you still remember the exact date the man died. You know his name now – you checked the news to see if it had been released every day after the accident.
He was a father to a young girl, apparently. Only 24, a health freak and gym junkie. He  was part of the military. You wonder how much of his life he got to live.
You see him everywhere. Not only behind your eyes and in your dreams, no. You see him at the shops, in a young father with a toddler, holding his daughters hand and walking her around. You see him whenever you pass by the gym near your house, seeing all of the people swarming the entrance at all times of the day. You wonder if he was ever one of them.
You aren’t sure if his daughter will remember him. Why does this matter to you – you never knew this man. Somehow, a man you’ve only ever known as a corpse has become an important part of your life. You can’t figure out why.
There aren’t any cemeteries near your area. You wonder if he was buried or cremated. Would you be able to visit his grave, if he had one? How would you explan your visit to a family member that might be there?
‘Oh, sorry to show up to your relatives grave, I saw  his dead body being carted away by paramedics and now I can’t stop thinking about him. Enjoy your day!’
You decide not to look. It’ll be easier that way.
Some people you know throw around terms – traumatic, disorder, therapy. You don’t listen too hard. You don’t hear anything but sirens anyway.
You don’t walk on that sidewalk for months afterwards. When you finally do, it’s hand in hand with a friend who doesn’t notice your panic attack, who laughs off your warning to stick to the side of the path. And you can’t quite blame her. You suppose it would sound stupid if someone told you that, too.
No one really knows. A few friends, and your mother, but she told you that if you told anyone else then it made you a terrible fucking person, so you don’t. you make a few jokes, and people laugh it off because it’s you. They were never really jokes, not really. But you don’t know how else to say it.
September 17th.
You can still see him when you close your eyes.
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jenivi7 · 3 years ago
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writing tag game!
Thank you @clyde-side and @bdeblueyes for the tag!!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
22 plus a small handful on ff.net that I still intend to move over to AO3.
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
30,445!  I’m surprised it’s that much considering how short most of those stories are. (And it’s a little deceptive since it doesn’t include the 80k monstrosity that is Ryou and the Thief. That one’s probably going to stay on ff.net though.)
3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Those Things He Keeps for Himself (Total agreement. Personally I think this is the best thing I’ve written so far.)
Human (Was at #1 until very recently! I attribute this entirely to the story being on @shinayashipper’s Rivalshipping Rec List. Thank you Red! <3 )
Black (From when I wandered into Homestuck fanfic for a brief time! I’m still stupid proud of this one though.)
Ghosts, Goths and Other Anxieties (original short story) (I swear I’ll get back to posting the big bang version soon)
Finality (This one’s so old but I guess people still like their tendershipping! I mean, same~)
4. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
I do try to respond to everything! I so appreciate when other authors respond to me and do my best to return that good good energy. Also I genuinely like chatting with people (especially about something I wrote lol) even if I get overwhelmed sometimes and can be slow ^^; 
5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
This is a tough one cause when I start a story, it’s usually with the goal of giving the characters a happy end but it’s probably Coffee and Cigarettes. It was for a pairings competition where the random pairing was Mana/TK Bakura and I gave them a weird little break in the middle of canon where they both know what’s about to happen and it just came out sad.  NO WAIT I’M WRONG. Lol I just gave my story list another look and it’s definitely Crazy for You! That was an insane asylum AU that’s ABOUT everything going straight to shit.
6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
Oh goodness, almost all of them! I love a happy ending. Like, the story doesn’t have to be all fluff, it can have an impossible looking problem or be about two people who just don’t go well together but I love a good, satisfying resolution. Most recent happy ending is No Betting, just a bit of adorable, domestic, peachshipping fluff. Favorite happy end is probably A Million Missed Chances, Mai/Valon. I feel like Mai is a challenging character to give a happy ending to. She’s just stubborn like that <3
7. Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?
So, I haven’t written a crossover yet by myself but @miss-moberg and I will often throw around ideas for ones where we will use YGO characters or parts of the world building or magic system to fix things we don’t like in other canons. Right now we have a RP that’s a BNHA/YGO crossover where… oh, spoilers for BNHA: instead of going crazy and faking his own death, Toya grabs both his brothers and just fucking leaves. They run away to Domino, get picked up by Ryou and Akeifa (TK Bakura) and it quickly becomes the found family story I didn’t know I needed. We do some wild things blending the two canons. Domino is this little pocket where shadow magic keeps the hero and villain nonsense out and the citizens are pretty ok with it. Yugi and Atem are the city’s guardians. Ryou and Akeifa are not allowed to use shadow magic though they have access to it. I think Ryou and Yugi had proper quirks that they sacrificed to the shadows at some point, each for something different thing that they wanted or needed. Oh! We have quirks being derived from shadow magic at some point in the distant past and the shadows are always happy to take a quirk back to fulfill a wish or desire. They’re tricky though and usually corrupting. Very classic fairytale where it’s a thing you don’t want to make a deal with. Seto is quirkless and basically runs the city behind the scenes. He can’t deny the existence of heroes and villains but still refuses to believe in magic. This always gives Atem a headache when they have to coordinate to protect the city. Which is often.
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
A couple criticisms but no outright hate I don’t think. Or if I have it was so long ago I don’t remember. I was on ff.net at the worst times too and somehow all the hate just passed me by.
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I love smut so much but I rarely write it. For stories I just usually end up with one or two erotic sentences. RPs are the exceptions to that though and are where all the good stuff happens. >.>
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Nope. Haven’t had one stolen, haven’t had one taken down. I’ve stayed small enough to fly under the radar for both things luckily enough!
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I wish! Man that would be amazing <3
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes! Ryou and the Thief is a cleaned up version of @miss-moberg and my very first RP. (And the only RP of ours to ever hit an actual ending.)
13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
Puzzle with Gemshipping very close behind though I ship many, many things.
14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
Phoenix. It was one of my very first fanfics started almost 15 years ago and while I’d love to finish everything, that one’s just not going to happen. It’s been too long and I’ve grown way too much as a writer to go back to it now.
15. What are your writing strengths?
I think it’s dialogue. And maybe the ability to be amusing. Not funny-funny but like, lightly humorous when setting scenes or winding up to something.
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
RUN ON SENTENCES. Sometimes they get away from me a bit XD
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
Haaaa, actually when I first started writing fanfic I would throw in Japanese phrases and honorifics and looking back, it’s pretty cringe. BUT I can appreciate it as it was originally intended: learning and practicing a new language. If it makes sense for the character or situation though it’s really cute, like in Allargando by Slaycinder where Atem uses Arabic endearments for Seto. (Have I gushed about that fic on my blog yet? It’s so good.) Ancient Egyptian is the exception to everything I just said. I absolutely LOVE when someone takes a stab at putting ancient Egyptian in their fic. I go a little feral for it and it was the hardest but the most fulfilling thing about writing Ryou and the Thief was doing all the research write actual AE dialogue for Akeifa early in the fic.
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Yu-Gi-Oh. I’ve done a handful of things for other fandoms but Ygo is the one I keep coming back to and definitely the one I’ve written the vast majority for.
19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Oh no this is hard! They’re all my babies and I love them! Probably my favorites have been listed in previous questions already. Ryou and the Thief because of the sheer amount of work that went into it and the fact that we ran the boys through a whole ass adventure, Coffee and Cigarettes because it’s such a fun, quirky little thing with a great atmosphere and Those Things He Keeps For Himself because I feel like I was able to really capture the idea in my head effectively and there’s some great imagery in it.
TAGGING:  Oh my god this took me so long to finally sit down and complete that probably everyone I would tag has done it already!  So not tagging anyone this time but please do it if it seems fun!
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celticheartedfangirl · 5 years ago
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My OUAT Rewatch -- S4E22 and 23 -- Operation Mongoose, Parts 1 & 2
Link to Rewatch Review and Ranking archive
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Bobby looks about as done with this season as I am.  I know Michael Socha was done with it -- literally -- but we’ll get to that later.
This is gonna be long.  So have a seat, pour yourself a drink or seven, and get ready.  I’m not holding back . . . . . . 
First of all, I debated about whether I should review this as one or two episodes.  I decided to go with one, and will do this going forward with any episodes that have the same title and are part 1,2, 8 million, whatever.  Trust me, at times it SEEMED like 8 million.
First thing I want to address is a bunch of fandom wank nonsense that came out of this episode -- namely the idea that RUMPLE wrote the story.  Let me make this perfectly clear:
Rumple DID NOT WRITE THIS STORY.  Isaac did.  Rumple told him what HE, personally, wanted.  Isaac took it from there.  Rumple didn’t write Isaac as a famous douchebag author, and he sure as hell wouldn’t have given fucking ZELENA a wedding in the story, he’d have killed her off in a painful but well-deserved death.  Ditto Hook.  So if you still actually think Rumple wrote this story, my recommendation to you is that you back out of this post now.  And you should probably stay off my blog in general.  Because frankly, I think you are wrong and stupid and we are not compatible in any way.  Got it?
Looking at YOU, some RUMBELLE FANS who actually did this shit:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118193570842/i-am-stunned-to-see-some-rumbelle-fans-bitching
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Okay, so there’s THAT.  Next . . . 
So this episode was A&E’s attempt at META.  And frankly, they SUCK at it.  It didn’t come off as funny, it came off as making fun of the fans.  No spoilers, ha ha ha .  . . . . . . for those not in the know, back when the show was airing, Adam’s go to answer to fans on Twitter was #nospoilers.  So the whole Isaac so thing was basically a dig at the FANS.  
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So there’s THAT.
The entertainment media was shitting all over Rumbelle before the finale, which pissed me off enough to make this post:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118484723732/when-and-why-exactly-did-rumbelle-become-the
And this comment:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118467157702/ouat-finale-your-burning-relationship-questions
And then there’s THIS:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118658755342/omg-ae-dig-the-knife-in-why-dont-you
Yes, in case you weren’t clear, dead is DEAD (we’ll revisit this thought in S5), Neal ain’t coming back, suck on it all of you who don’t like that!  Love, Adam and Eddy.  
Also, in other bullshit news, regarding who taught Henry to sail a ship:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118655893997/henry-no-your-father-taught-you-that
And THIS:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118660507567/what-the-fuck-they-left-rumple-on-the-floor-but
Revisiting May 2015 me is making current me stabby.  And I haven’t even mentioned the entire town of dumbasses herp-derping around and partying at Granny’s while Rumple is dying and could be a meat suit for the ultimate evil of all evils any second now.  Morons.  
Let’s talk about the stuff I DID enjoy . . . . 
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Evil Snow was a riot!  
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Bandit!Regina was fantastic.  
And this guy:
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Gotta love Knight!Rumple!  
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Also, I will admit . . . . . Hook was more useful in useless mode in the AU than he’s ever been in Hook mode outside of the AU.  Does that make sense?  
So there’s all of that.  Overall this 2-part thing was part good stuff, mostly hot mess, and a lot of middle fingers waved to the fans from the writers.  But tally comes later.  NOW is the time to address the Michael Socha issue:
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Right about now, dearie.  Will Scarlett is gone.  You will never see him or hear about him again.
(Side note:  Made an error in my last review.  I honestly did not remember AT ALL that we saw Lily again in this episode, both in person form or in dragon form.  Which tells you how much of an impression that made on me.  Anyhoo, my bad.  I goofed.  NOW she’s gone for good.)
So what was the deal with Will Scarlett anyway?  
Well . . . . nobody knows.  We’ll probably NEVER know.  You see, Will Scarlett was one of the breakout characters from the spinoff Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, and when that got canceled, someone -- really not sure who -- thought it’d be an awesome idea to plunk him onto OUAT.  
There were many schools of thought on this, the primary one being that ABC wanted him for something and wanted to keep him on contract.  That was 2014.  I’m typing this in 2020, and there’s still no Michael Socha show on ABC.  So that was a load of horse shit -- or else Socha told ABC to fuck off and hightailed it back to England.  My money is on the latter.  
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/115784240042/honest-question-why-did-they-bring-will-onto
But the issue isn’t even that they didn’t do fuck-all with Socha -- it’s the LIES that these assholes (they being A&E) told.  So here’s where my receipts come in.  You ready?  Got your popcorn?
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First of all there’s this lovely article -- Will is mentioned by all of it is just glorious in general:
https://oncecrazy.tumblr.com/post/118843079631/the-26-things-the-castwriters-promised-would
What is so HIGHlarious about all of this is that almost all of the articles that existed about the whole Will Scarlett thing -- no longer EXIST!
The highlight is Zap2it -- which is a now defunct fan site that A&E liked to go prattle to.  
So Frick and Frack promised us we’d find out how Belle & Will got together.  I have this:
https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/424464333605771793/#
And I have this:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/113163777872/once-upon-a-time-belle-and-the-knave-are-a-new
I also have a bunch of people I KNOW can confirm they saw this interview full of bullshit before it got erased.  Please show yourselves!  
But fear not -- I have an ACTUAL receipt from Mr. Socha himself:
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/140658788782/apparently-michael-socha-got-screwed-over-by-ouat
https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/140624375357/hes-a-good-bloke-i-saw-him-at-the-comic-con
I’m grateful someone had the idea to type it out, because sadly the link to that article was DELETED, which makes me think Socha got in trouble for that interview.  Because shortly after that, a more watered down interview with him was posted in its place and THAT is still up:
https://www.digitalspy.com/tv/ustv/a785951/michael-socha-confirms-once-upon-a-time-exit/
Interesting, no?
Whatever the case -- Socha got royally fucked over by OUAT, for no good reason.  His character was a plot device.  What a waste and what an insult to the man who just wanted to work.  Fuck these assholes.  
So anyhow, there are the receipts, and we are now at the end of the clusterfuck that was Season 4.  
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Speaking of clusterfucks . . . . onward to Season 5.  
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Lord, give me strength . . . . . 
Points tally:
40 points to start
10 points for Rumbelle kiss
10 points for Rumbelle hug
5 points for Swan Queen
3 points for Papafire, at least it got mentioned
5 points for Belle in character
5 points for Rumple in character
5 points deducted for Hook
5 points deducted for Zelena
I really can’t justify adding or deducting anything bonus.  Just get me out of this season, please and thank you.
Total points:  68
Follow #celtichearted OUAT ranking tag for more to come!
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hollandroos · 6 years ago
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Before I Go | Peter P X Stark!Reader
Summary: Inspired by this blurb I wrote last week. Tony Stark was always putting himself in harm's way but one day things finally go too far. It’s a good thing Peter is there to hold you up back, right? Wrong.
Words: 1205
Warnings: Death, angst. 
Listen to ‘Listen Before I Go’ By Billie Eilish while reading this, thank you!
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Everything went grey when you lost him. And you hated grey. It was sad, bland and there were a hundred other – better colours.
It was as if there was colour one second, from the brown with hints of green that adorned Peters eyes and the traces of blue in his suit to the red of the shirt you gave your dad for father's day last year. Then there were the green sneakers he gave you when you were fourteen that were scuffed and ripped but you refused to throw out. You loved those sneakers.
Then there was grey. Ugly, dark and dreary grey. It was the colour of the sky on a rainy day that kept you pent up inside and the top of the desks at midtown high that you hated. Each to their own – they held unique doodles and gum that ranged from two days old to 6 months.
Your screams couldn’t echo in space – at least you didn’t think they could but you hadn’t thought too hard about it while fighting for the fate of humanity. Still, everyone heard. It was piercing. Heart-wrenching.
Steve heard and his heart plummeted in his chest. It landed in empty, shattered pieces across what could be gravel. Thor heard. Without a doubt, he heard and he dropped his hammer, making it fall with a heavy thud that shook the very core of whatever planet you had been fighting on. And Peter heard because he was the one next to you when it happened, holding you back from losing your own life to the mad titan the same way your father just had
You watched the life leave his lips with one last breath and the gentle pink of his cheeks fade into nothing.
If you’ve ever seen the life leave someone then you already know what happens next. The picture becomes almost engraved in the darkest parts of your mind, little parts of it remaining more vivid than others and for you, it was easily watching his deep brown eyes, the same colour of the coffee he consumed excessively become nothing more then lifeless orbs. You’d seen your father empty before, like when Pepper left him for the first time and the day he clambered home from his fight with Steve but this was something else.  
It was enough to rip your heart from your chest.
“Peter, let me go. Let me go to him.” You begged through ugly sobs. He winced at how scratchy and desperate your voice sounded – like you were running out of air, but instead of air, it was your desire to keep up the fight.
Peter swallows, waiting for Tony to move– to somehow come back to life but it won’t happen. Not ever, because he’d seen the older mans neck snap. He’d heard the snap and he swore he felt it too. He felt the ground ripple beneath him when it happened and maybe nothing would ever be the same. That sickening fucking snap would be the source of all of his nightmares for god knows how long. It would ring louder then any David Bowie song he could play on his iPhone and taste worse then any broccoli May could try and force him to eat at dinner.
In his arms, you struggle and fight against him like he was the enemy. You kick and hit and through teary eyes you curse. And Peter would admit that it hurt– not your fighting but the fact that he swore he could feel your heart shattering more with every empty second that passed.
“I can’t… please, Y/N, I can’t.” He struggles, watching the others take down the titan that’d taken the life of their beloved but with a rage larger then life itself.
Peter wanted to be out there too, but if Tony Stark couldn’t defeat him then neither could Peter, he could admit that now. Peter would probably stumble up on his own two feet or struggle to see through glazed over eyes. He’d lose his own life and he couldn’t – not when he’d promised May that he’d come home.
For the first time in a while, Peter was able to admit that he was still a kid, and the struggling girl in his arms was the same. He holds onto you like his life depended on it which it probably did. However, the suit that clings to your body is a brutal reminder that you can fight for yourself but Peter couldn’t have you getting killed too. Not now. Maybe it was selfish – maybe he was just keeping you alive.
Keeping you alive – because he couldn’t keep the other Stark alive.
Maybe he was keeping the promise he made Tony the last time he almost died.
“God fucking dammit, Pete! Let me go.” You screech with so much might. Your throat aches. It burns with so much rage and sadness and desperation. Peter feels all of it – though maybe that’s just his own.
And as the seconds ticked by, the tightening in your throat increased and you needed an escape. The elastic, emerald green suit had never been so suffocating. You had never wanted to tear the thing from your body as much as you did then.
“I can’t do that, baby.” He says softly, choking back the hurt.
You’re seeing grey. It’s envelopes your vision. Your brain. Clouding your heart.
Endless thoughts are consumed with getting to your dad because he looks alone and he hated being alone, despite him never admitting it but you knew because you hated being alone too. It was a Stark thing. Maybe that’s why you say what you do next, spitting the harsh words between salty lips.
“I hate you, let me go!”
I hate you.
But you could never hate him.
He hates himself.
“I can’t.” The words are forced, surely more gentle then he had initially anticipated and there’s only a dull chance you heard.
And over the ringing of your ears, you didn’t.
Peter had held you plenty of times before. There was the time he held you in the back of the school library when you both had a free period and you were drifting off in his arms after three days without sleep. Then there was the time he snuck into your room without your dad's knowledge and wrapped himself up in between cotton sheets. How could you nearly forget the time you got snowed in at his apartment and had to stay the night in his tiny bed built for merely one body?
But this time was different because Peter had never held you back before. He’d always encouraged you to leap into the unknown and explore your abilities and skills but now he held you back – he held you back from ripping the head off of the mad Titan and he held you back from avenging your father's death. For the first time ever, his grip felt suffocating. 
Peters arms no longer felt safe. It was the one place you had always felt safe and now? Nothing.
You feel hollow.
Sorry can't save me now Sorry I don't know how Sorry there's no way out
Part 2
Let me know if you enjoyed it!
Everything tags: @cosmetologynerd @holland-ish @smexylemony @dej-okay@hollandsletters @ive-got-some-lies-to-tell @liz-gayllen@marvelismylifffe@lovelyh0lland @tomhollandandmarvelsworld @woah-jess@southsidefandoms@justannothermonday @its-claire-louise@sophiatomlinson23 @mockingjaygirl1221@joyfullyjenny@damnhisfaceisliketheskyatnight  @bride-of-loki-odinson @in-the-corner-coffee-please@futuremrsb-r-main @spideyyypeter @saturn-aka-six@c0prolalia @buckykinz@ashtonsbandannas @dennasaur @amyyleblanc1999@fnosidam@randomfangirl1701@maybeandperhaps @acciorinn @marvel-language @micki-smiles@justmesadgirl @converseskyline @niall2017@gavemylifetotomholland @tomuchmarvel@leslieandjensen @painted-soulss@practicallylivesonline @mischiefmanaged49 @its-the-unknownspidey@holyrose96 @for-my-mind @mlxbm @erindillon11 @captainbuckyy @shawnandhisroses @converseskyline @smitten0-0kitten @parkeroos @whileinparis @unicornio-vomita-mierdas @draqcnheartstrinq @rainyboo-posts @mikalaka @petxrpxrker @tony-starks-ego @thedaydreamingwriter @peter-quackson @kateelyse96 @lesbian-jesus-jr @wheresmyquill@elyshugh@hollanderheart @tomshufflepuff @marvelismylifffe @tomsh0lland @obsessed-fandoms @girl-in-the-chair @trashqueenbitch @dramatic-and-young @honey-honey-5644@parkerluvs @chingonaconcha @captainbuckyy @jes-sica1@tomsfireheart @Rainbow-marvel @spideysimpossiblegirl @spideys-gurl@thomasstanley-holland @mlxbm @ixchel-9275@parkerssweb @peter-parkersbb @tom-hollands-eyelash @starlightfound @vldlvj  @paradoxparker @lustfulcry  @mlxbm @musiclover1263 @justatheatredork@peterparkerscamera@fandomnerdsarecool @thequeensardine @cutesy-angst@httplayer @mischiefmanaged49 @loca-lola @softboyparkerr @desir-ae @dangerousluv1 @t-hotland @laucontrerasv @peter-parkersbb@whatdafricklefrackle @thatblondebelgiangirl @fairydustparker @they-call-me-le @jamiemac26@nephalem67 @underoos-tom @quaxon-holland@lovelyspidey @no-shxt-sherl @xlatinaaxx@starlightfound @mikexpeter @moonandstars-xo @httpmcrvel @evelyn120700@fromheroestodust@hollandfieldblurbs @ghostlypandacolorpersona@spazclaiire @curlyhairedparker @josierosie@unicornio-vomita-mierdas @icondy@euphoricholland @desir-ae @lovelyspidey @thelazypangolin@ameeravioli@ramen-tically @mellifluous-tom @mrs-webslinger @krazykiara @scottyisthatyou@@s0cial-retard @sithskywalkers @avenirectioner @cokemania147@awkwardfangirl2014 @thot–holland @tomsmelanin @tryn25 @marvelismylifffe @fratboievans @draqcnheartstrinq @mellifluous-tom @obsidiandolans @peter-parkersbb @slingingwingingspidey @darlingxholland @50shadesoflaurmani @tomhollandswh0re  @ixchel-9275 @hellaparker @vintagexquill @spidey-caps
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Note
[1] Ok so I've just finished the Ray Route for the first time w/o spoilers successfully! Thanks for answering all my nonsensical asks all throughout these 11 days. I'd thought I'd collect a few of my thoughts and put them here: (1) I have to say Saeran is now my favourite character. He's. Just a cool dude I guess (2) Cleansed Saeran is basically Edge Boi™ who dressed up for a job interview at Hot Topic. He tries to scare people but he fails poor boy (3) Ray is,,, kinda clingy I don't know man he
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congratulations on reaching the finish line!! glad to talk to you over those chaotic 11 days! since you sent me these asks in parts, i’ll answer them accordingly under the cut!
1. saeran’s a GREAT dude he’s been through so much but hes so good and so strong and hes VERY GREAT n i have a very high fever so all my brain cells are bringing to the table is inane shouting and “ohoogughhug saeran good”
2. cleansed saeran as a phrase still dealt me 50 poison damage because i cannot Stand people yelling at me Ever because i am just a tiny creacher…..but its good that it didnt affect you too much!!
3. now ray’s character is really a Hit Or Miss and the way you view him is completely valid but its important to understand exactly where he’s coming from, especially in his own route. i think recognising why certain habits of his are unhealthy to himself and those around him, as well as recognising why he has them, is a crucial part of ray’s route (although you probably know that already!) so all im saying is its very good to call him out for his unhealthy habits! but please try to be nice to him ^^;;
4. its probably not that funny but the entire time v’s telling rika how much he still loves her he looks like he’s passing the fattest kidney stone so judging by that im pretty sure they’re gonna burn like saeran’s house :/ 
5. rika is designed to be a very morally ambiguous and morally provocative character, and the way someone perceives her is almost always entirely dependent on their own experiences, which is why i believe that you’re in no way wrong whether you like her or don’t like her
personally i have a lot of Thoughts on rika that i might discuss in detail sometime later, but the general gist of it is Good Intentions, Bad Actions. everything she’s done has been under a twisted conception of love, and the moment she started involving other people she became exempt from being easily excused for her actions, but i think her desire to be a good person means that she has the potential to find a kind of love that’s not destructive to herself or others, and i’d like to hold her responsible for self recovery more than self retribution (of course then my argument brings up the whole “then no criminal would actually be a criminal” issue and yeah this whole debacle is messy and deliberately situational but since i’m not the one in charge of Rika’s Divine Ruling, i dont reckon there’s any point to thinking about it too much…… im just gonna go with my gut sjhgckf)
6. if they kill seven im gonna. well im. im just gonna cry BUT considering they brought ray back from the dead in the most arbitrary way in v’s ae im gonna assume seven’s chances are pretty fucking good (to be a bit more exact, you still get a few of seven’s thoughts on day 10 and one response where youre like “he might be playing around with the kidnapper’s wits!” gets a heart from him so if he’s alive enough to give you kudos for a comment he can’t even see then im gonna hope he’s alive enough to survive the ae)
7. v’s ae took a HECK of a lotta time but im assuming that’s because they had to lay out a HECK of a lotta foundations for this new style of ae, so ray’s shouldn’t take as long! maybe sometime near the middle/end of this year? its good to try be patient but if youre frustrated you cannn engage in the fandom annnndddd…….talk to……meeeee JHVBDGCVKFGJHJ im ALWAYS up for ray route talk >:3
8. (you didnt have point 8 but you do now) i really hope you 1) enjoyed the route!! and 2) get some Good Sleep im sending you sleepy vibbbbeess uwu
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