#and legit the first thing when looking up the gif on google images

[ktempestbradford]

I have been on a Willy Wonkified journey today and I need y'all to come with me

It started so innocently. Scrolling Google News I come across this article on Ars Technica:

At first glance I thought what happened was parents saw AI-generated images of an event their kids were at and became concerned, then realized it was fake. The reality? Oh so much better.

On Saturday, event organizers shut down a Glasgow-based "Willy's Chocolate Experience" after customers complained that the unofficial Wonka-inspired event, which took place in a sparsely decorated venue, did not match the lush AI-generated images listed on its official website.... According to Sky News, police were called to the event, and "advice was given."

Thing is, the people who paid to go were obviously not expecting exactly this:

But I can see how they'd be a bit pissed upon arriving to this:

It gets worse.

"Tempest, how could it possibly--"

source of this video that also includes this charming description:

Made up a villain called The Unknown — 'an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls'

There is already a meme.

Oh yes, the Wish.com Oompa Loompa:

Who has already done an interview!

As bad (and hilarious) as this all is, I got curious about the company that put on this event. Did they somehow overreach? Did the actors they hired back out at the last minute? (Or after they saw the script...) Oddly enough, it doesn't seem so!

Given what I found when poking around I'm legit surprised there was an event at all. Cuz this outfit seems to be 100% a scam.

The website for this specific event is here and it has many AI generated images on it, as stated. I don't think anyone who bought tickets looked very closely at these images, otherwise they might have been concerned about how much Catgacating their children would be exposed to.

Yes, Catgacating. You know, CATgacating!

I personally don't think anyone should serve exarserdray flavored lollipops in public spaces given how many people are allergic to it. And the sweet teats might not have been age appropriate.

Though the Twilight Tunnel looks pretty cool:

I'm not sure that Dim Tight Twdrding is safe. I've also been warned that Vivue Sounds are in that weird frequency range that makes you poop your pants upon hearing them.

Yes, Virginia, these folks used an AI image generator for everything on the website and used Chat GPT for some of the text! From the FAQ:

Q: I cannot go on the available days. Will you have more dates in the future? A: Should there be capacity when you arrive, then you will be able to enter without any problems. In the event that this is not the case, we may ask you to wait a bit.

Fear not, for this question is asked again a few lines down and the answer makes more sense.

Curious about the events company behind this disaster, I took myself over to the homepage of House of Illuminati and I was not disappointed.

I would 100% trust these people to plan my wedding.

This abomination of a website is a badly edited WordPress blog filled with AI art and just enough blog posts to make the casual viewer think that it's a legit business for about 0.0004 seconds.

Their attention to detail is stunning, from how they left up the default first post every WP blog gets to how they didn't bother changing the name on several images, thus revealing where they came from. Like this one:

With the lovely and compact filename "DALL·E-2024-01-30-09.50.54-Imagine-a-scene-where-fantasy-and-reality-merge-seamlessly.-In-the-foreground-a-grand-interactive-gala-is-taking-place-filled-with-elegant-guests-i.png"

"Concept.png" came from the same AI generator that gets text almost, but not quiiiiiite right:

There are a suspicious number of .webp images in the uploads, which makes me think they either stole them from other sites where AI "art" was uploaded or they didn't want to pay for the hi-res versions of some and just grabbed the preview image.

The real fun came when I noticed this filename: Before-and-After-Eventologists-Transformation-Edgbaston-Cricket-Ground-1024x1024-1.jpg and decided to do a Google image search. Friends, you will be shocked to hear that the image in question, found on this post touting how they can transform a boring warehouse into a fun event space, was stolen from this actual event planner.

Even better, this weirdly grainy image?

From a post that claims to be about the preparations for a "Willy Wonka" experience (we'll get to this in a minute), is not only NOT an actual image of anyone preparing anything for Illuminati's event, it is stolen from a YouTube thumbnail that's been chopped to remove the name of the company that actually made this. Here's the video.

If you actually read the blog posts they're all copypasta or some AI generated crap. To the point where this seems like not a real business at all. There's very specific business information at the bottom, but nothing else seems real.

As I said, I'm kinda surprised they put on an event at all. This has, "And then they ran off with all our money!" written all over it. I'm perplexed.

And also wondering when the copyright lawyers are gonna start calling, because...

This post explicitly says they're putting together a "Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory Experience" complete with golden tickets.

Somewhere along the line someone must have wised up, because the actual event was called "Willys Chocolate Experience" (note the lack of apostrophe) and the script they handed to the actors about 10 minutes before they were supposed to "perform" was about a "Willy McDuff" and his chocolate factory.

As I was going through this madness with friends in a chat, one pointed out that it took very little prompting to get the free Chat GPT to spit out an event description and such very similar to all this while avoiding copyrighted phrases. But he couldn't figure out where the McDuff came from since it wasn't the type of thing GPT would usually spit out...

Until he altered the prompt to include it would be happening in Glasgow, Scotland.

You cannot make this stuff up.

But truly, honestly, I do not even understand why they didn't take the money and run. Clearly this was all set up to be a scam. A lazy, AI generated scam.

Everything from the website to the event images to the copy to the "script" to the names of things was either stolen or AI generated (aka stolen). Hell, I'd be looking for some poor Japanese visitor wandering the streets of Glasgow, confused, after being jacked for his mascot costume.

HE LIVES IN THE WALLS, Y'ALL.

[uncertainmagia]

AAAAHHHH Charalá!! Thank you so much for bringing her to life, it's so awesome to get to *see* her!!

Charalá and Aketzali, like Magda and Saúl, are two of several ancient spirits in Uncertain Magia. While Magda and Saúl take inspiration from caimans and African mythology/Colombian folktales respectively, Charalá and Aketzali...

I'mma be real. Charalá and Aketzali are here because my sapphic self wanted a butch4butch couple in Huerto Viejo and after brainstorming with my friends I became obsessed with the idea of LIBRARY POSSUM SPIRIT GFS

I ended up falling into a huuuuge rabbit hole?? Which I absolutely must share. Join me, friends, on the hunt for a legit Colombian cryptid.

First step:

Okay, so northern gracile opossum. If you speak Spanish, you know *exactly* why I chose this specific possum. (Yes, I am an absolute gremlin. Context for non-Spanish speakers: the second word in its scientific name is the same word as a Spanish slur for gay people. Get reclaimed.)

However, when I looked up northern gracile opossum:

All right, these all look pretty similar, right?

Except. One says Brazilian gracile opossum, and the other two say agile gracile opossum.

And if you go to the first link, even that isn't the northern gracile possum.

It's a whole genus, and that picture also shows the agile gracile opossum.

The only reason this is an issue is that I'm trying really hard to narrow this down to specifically Colombian wildlife, and the habitat of the agile gracile possum doesn't quite include Colombia.

Back to the wikipedia page on the whole genus.

So there are several species here, with relatively close-by if not overlapping habitats.

I want to take a moment to emphasize this.

The northern gracile opossum has one of the smallest ranges, if wikipedia is to be trusted. Which. Which is another rabbit hole I need to circle back to, before I'm done researching.

At this point, though, I was still pretty confident.

Oh ho ho: the hubris. Behold, a preview.

At first, however, there were good signs:

We start to get to the root of the issue at the reproduction section. (No, the joke I'm building up to is not some weird possum mating thing. As my friends quote Pattern from Stormlight Archive, and as I cannot resist quoting despite not having read beyond WoK: NO MATING)

Huh, no info at all.

Oh heck. No info again.

Yuuuup.

Alright, alright. Well, very little info on this site about the northern gracile opossum. That's fine.

(Although this had me scratching my head. If there so many of them, why is there so little info?)

I start looking for photos, since all the photos that showed up in my first search were of related species like agile gracile possum.

However:

Almost *every* single image I find online is a different possum.

I decide to try Google Scholar, with the following results.

As before, the results are either different related species. Or, when it is the northern gracile opossum... absolutely no info.

Heckin.

Colombian.

Cryptid.

I'm so sorry for technically possum-fishing you @temporary-tats with the photo refs I sent, but those were all agile gracile possums.

This tiny, adorable possum broke me. It's the first time I ever used a reference of a different species in Uncertain Magia lore notes. For the sake of my sanity, I must assume northern and agile possums are similar.

For now.

I am still far, far too stubborn to let Charalá be anything other than a northern gracile opossum spirit. I will find a photo of this possum. I will find information on it.

One day, possum.

A ko-fi roulette request from @uncertainmagia of their OC, Charalá! Thank you for your support <3

This was a super fun request to do, really love how this one turned out! (And loving the new pencil brush I've been using as well - let me know what you guys think of it!)

Per usual, do not reupload without credit/permission. Thank you folks!

(My ko-fi, should you wish!)

[wickednerdery]

Title: Hoarfrost Hel: Bound Author: @wickednerdery Fandom: Marvel Pairing/character: Loki & Thor (& family) Rating: Teen Summary: “I’m sorry” Notes: This takes place very shortly after the start of Thor: Dark World, but I’m honestly only using canon things I want lol! The concept of a Thrall Collar is from @endlessstairway and her amazing stories here. This is the start of the second part of what’s shaping up to be a legit trilogy - the first is FrostBitten. The story on whole is gonna be very dark, this piece itself has torturing of Loki based on the Loki Bound myth…For that and length it gets a “Read More”.

The peace of darkness does not last for Loki as he awakes in the same position as he fell unconscious. Instinct causes a leap from the burning venom he knows is coming, but chains hold him to the ground even as muscles strain. They crackle, shudder with his body, as he doubles efforts.

“Shhh, Loki, be still,” Thor soothes from above and he goes stock still, even stops his breath. “No, um, I mean...” orders can be taken so literally by thrall collars. “Please breathe…And just…relax, brother, if you can. I’ve got you. Do you understand?”

Rough air vibrates raw throat in response.

“Mother sent a healer, he did all he could before father interceded. Now they argue so the whole of Asgard can hear it. She warns him of terrible things should he continue down this path, I half suspect them threats.” Thor breaths a laugh, hoping Loki will join him, but there’s only another groan. “Your eye is healed.”

As if it reminds him they exist, Loki opens both cautiously. Thor kneels above, over, him with bowl held high. “Wha-What are you...doing?”

“I tried to kill the beast, it will not die.” He shifts fingers, adjusts. “But I’ll not allow you to suffer so long as I’m able.”

Venom plinks into the bowl, Loki understands. “I could be here ‘til Ragnarök.”

“Then we shall experience the end together.”

“I-I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Everything...” he huffs out. “Jus-Just tell fa-” the collar shocks, Loki hisses. He’s been disowned, for him Odin is Father no more. “Tell Odin...Tell him...I-I’m sorry.” Perhaps that’s all that’ll be needed; for Loki to come meek and apologetic and subservient before the great King of Asgard. That and their mother’s words; she could always bring Father to heel when it came to her boys.

Thor only frowns, knowing it’ll fall on deaf ears just as his own words had. Just as their mother’s seem to. Odin’s determined not only to punish Loki, but to erase him entirely...bit by venomous bit. “I tried to cut the serpent down, but still it clings,” he changes the subject, gives them a distraction. “I wonder if it’s not also bewitched. Can you tell?”

The once-sorcerer merely shakes his head. “I’ve no way to. My abilities are stopped by the collar.”

“Perhaps if I order you?” Thor offers; the other shrugs and Thor takes it as encouragement. “Loki, I order you, use your magics to determine what keeps this serpent up and alive.”

Loki only needs a moment to see their grave mistake. The collar obligates him to be submissive, obedient, to all those above him...but Thor is not his master, whose orders will supersede all but the collar’s itself, and so Loki cannot access his magic to obey this order. The collar fights itself across his neck and mind. It shocks and burns, chokes and seems to twist Loki from within.

Thor startles at his brother’s wail and drops the bowl. “No!” He flies across his brother, lets venom burn upon the back of his own neck. “No no no, stop it!” He yells in general, but the collar takes it upon itself to further punish Loki. “Stop, I rescind it! I rescind this order!”

Collar calms, Loki with it. ��You...cannot...order me.” Another shock, a grunt, then correction. “I cannot...follow orders above...his.” Loki holds breath, but the collar accepts the response.

Bowl back in hand Thor rights himself, sets bowl over his brother’s head once more. “I am sorry, brother.”

“You should not stay here, Thor. Your father will be cross.”

“Then let him be so.”

For six days and six nights Thor stays by his brother’s side. He refuses all that Loki is refused, including rich foods and new clothing. When guards come to collect him under Odin’s orders, he holds them off. When the Warriors Three come, he denies their offer to train. When Sif comes, he bids her away. When Loki drifts off he stays up, whispers to the snake his apologies at his attempt to destroy it if it is, in fact, as bewitched as his brother is now.

When Thor himself slumbers - always over his brother, arm across the other’s face so his own armor and arm will take the venom - Frigga’s image visits her son. She cannot undo what the Allfather has done, but she hums ancient lullabies to soothe and assures her son this will not be his ultimate fate. That he will always be her child. That she has and will always love him.

At daybreak of the seventh morning Loki wakes to sizzling skin. “Brother?!” He shifts away, tries to protect eye against the dripping venom. “THOR!!” He calls for his brother, seeks him out in his surroundings, but Thor’s no longer there. There are only soldiers of Asgard and those Loki recognizes as slave traders. “No...no no no...No! NO!! THOR!!”

Thor does not come. Frigga either. No one comes as men set to freeing him from one set of shackles only to put him into another. This time, shocks and burns be damned, Loki fights. He succeeds in lifting one of their knives to slice open the femoral of one before stabbing another. Both collar and guards combined crack him to the floor; no respect of the former prince now...muzzle crammed into mouth, hands caged behind, they throw him into a crate and then the ship with the rest.

Through slits in the cargo-hold he watches men surround the snake as it unfurls itself, shifts to form limbs, hair, and dress patterned as serpent skin had been. The spotted silver ring at the start of its neck is now a thrall collar like his own. There remains something serpentine in the woman’s golden eyes, in the way hips sway as she approaches ship. She curls beside him on the floor and works jaw out of its soreness as she’s left free to roam.

He looks up at her the best he can, curiosity mixing into his disbelief. How can she be so calm? How can she be so demure, obedient? Has she no sense of honor or pride? Where’s her fight? Her sense of dignity?

“If you continue to fight, things will only get worse.” She speaks politely, though sternly for a slave speaking to a once-king, still god. Loki’s eyes narrow, he growls his debate, to which she smiles faintly down into his cage. “You are not a prince anymore, you’ve no power except what you may earn as a thrall...and you’ll never earn it fighting your masters.” She gives a sigh both disappointed and sympathetic as she turns head from him to window. “I truly wish your brother had not ordered me to look after you.”

Couldn’t let Loki go quietly, that’s not in his nature at all, am I right? ;-) He’s not one to let anyone simply dominant him...but, of course, this will likely lead him to great troubles in the future, LOL! On the plus, now Loki and you have both, officially, met Malina, tada! Obviously you’ll learn more about her as things go on, but for now keep in mind that Thor ordered her to look after Loki when she was a snake and that order holds at least until she gets a new master. And where is Thor? Not telling, haha!

(Gif found on Google)

Tagged: @chibiyanai @wadeyouwitch @creedslove @lady-crowned-with-stars @moonfaery @annievvv7  @ladyfluff @holykryptonitekitten @lokilvrr @janebrownnie @lokis-little-kitten @alexakeyloveloki @theangelsfightwithdevils @the-blue-tiefling @lokis-lady-death @dangertoozmanykids101 @prometheasmother @vethrvolnir @wintertink @amethyst-dreams-and-candy-canes @drakonwild @starscreamloki @judas-nipples @hiddles-rose  @the-lady-witchitery @galaxies-inside-my-head @jackheart180 @lukeevansandjdmobession @endlessstairway @lanabanana-86 @tom-fucking-hiddleston-1981 @lovekrystina @madoka73  @lokikingofasgardslover713 @partiallyinthecloset @ultrarebelheart @gravitational-anomaly @manip-loki @my-world-of-imagines …Think that’s everyone from FrostBitten, if you want on or off, just lemme know! (Strike-throughs are those Tumblr refuses to tag properly)