#and it's like I don't know maybe I just am angry that he financially destroyed my mother and she's still recovering from it

[havegaysex]

My dad telling me about the new horse he just bought when I'm crying over car repairs and making my car payment really just pisses me off so much

[huevinart]

Christmas gift? 🎄🦎

(Syzoth x reader)

Warning: none

Vitally important information: I created this story for Violette from my Oc, but I named her this way (Vi) so they can give her whatever name they want, and be y/n.

The fanart on the cover was drawn by me

Enjoy this Christmas special 💚

"Syzoth, come with me, let's go out and see the snow, I'll teach you how to make a snowman."

My joy and desire to show her this world and its festive wonders was so great that I didn't pay attention to her reaction, it was so obvious, but of course, my neurons were singing Christmas carols and wouldn't let me reason.

“Eh, no thanks very much (Violette)”, oh his disgusted face made me want to hit him with the Christmas lights they were trying to unravel, what's wrong with him, he doesn't want to integrate? Maybe you don't like parties. Not even two minutes passed in which I pouted and crossed my arms like a capricious child, I know, I would hit myself too, I admit it. However, I mentioned this to Kenshi and he reminded me of something: SYZOTH HAD LOST HIS FAMILY! I am a beast!!! What a festive spirit the poor thing was going to have, by the ancient gods, I'm the worst! “Leave it like that, you're going to make it worse, you're a machine for ruining moments,” Johnny emphasized, that laugh! I swear I would make her swallow the irony of him, along with the teeth of him! Suddenly, he stood up and grabbed a bag, it was from one of those expensive stores, cool, “Do you still have money left after the divorce?”, and yes, I tried to let the sarcasm show but instead of making him angry, It was worse. “(Vi), how about you make snow angels outside and leave the adults here?” He continued on his way and without wanting to respond, I stayed in front of the stove, fighting with the Christmas lights.

"Hey, 'Reptile'"

"Reptile…."

"Reptile"

"Rep-"... "Johnny, stop it," Syzoth emphasizes, cutting him off, "what's going on?"

“He's not outside, stop looking out the window, he's downstairs doing what he does best”

“A tantrum?” Syzoth laughs lightly, although at times he was annoying, he never failed to find certain sincere attitudes that (Violette) had, tender.

“Yes, that's right, you are a genius, and because you behaved, Santa brought you your gift”

Johnny handed him a package containing a sports sweater, it was thermal and clearly expensive, but it would keep Syzoth warm, accompanied by some pants.

"I know you're watching her from afar, Kenshi and I thought maybe you'd like to go out and play with your kitty." Given the green color of his blood when he blushed, his cheeks were tinted that tone but in a light and subtle way. “Johnny, you know he hates being called that, but thank you, although I don't understand why they give me this.”

“One, you spend your time shivering in the cold, two, at Christmas we exchange gifts between the people we care about, and three, she's just one tantrum away from being deported to Outworld with a sign taped to her forehead that says 'DANGER, NO RETURN' Syzoth laughed and began to change, but not before thanking Johnny and then he would thank Kenshi in the same way, but not even five minutes had passed when the Light went out and a scream was heard in unison, one of those that Mothers and Parents, when they see you doing something wrong, “(Violette)!” I tried to fix those lights to decorate the tree and ended up leaving the whole house without light...

"For God's sake, Syzoth, take her outside to play."

As Johnny sighed in annoyance at my actions and their financial consequences, he laughed at how quickly Syzoth ran down the stairs and grabbed my hand, "Come with me," words that took me to nirvana, even though I was still cold. . . , he took the time to breathe the air a little, it was a new world for him. And before you mention his family and ruin the moment again by destroying his good mood,

He told Me that the reason for his disgusted face was the cold!

“Do you feel very cold?” My curious girl's face and my eyes wide open looking at him, the last frozen neuron in my brain took effect, letting out of my mouth the silliest questions ever heard, I'm sorry, I don't reason when I'm next to him. him. He, look at him, who did it? Would he do it? Let's face it, we would get lost in the beauty of it!

“(Violette) if you know that reptiles…. "No, leave it at that," he laughed cutely and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, "tell me more about what Christmas is," he said with a subtle smile, trying not to laugh at my faces, and well. . , that's all. I did it, gave it my Christmas spirit and maybe a cold.

It's true, I forgot, I saw him shivering from the cold on one occasion and I interrupted the conversation by sitting on his lap and hugging him. Going for a blanket was not an option. I looked into his eyes, he was sitting on his lap, our faces facing each other, an awkward silence, and a hug from me that was reciprocated, "Syzoth, I'll give you warmth if you want, warm hugs." the soul" I smiled and waited for his response, which took a few seconds, although it seemed like hours. "(Vi), it's not just your soul that you are warming." I didn't understand very well, but we entered the house. And finally yes You're wondering, when I went to kiss him on the cheek, he moved my face away, then smiled at my face of fear and shame at possible rejection and brought his face closer to mine to kiss me on the lips. It was a small kiss.. ., I didn't need anything else except Johnny's scream "Who put a mistletoe there?", I swear I didn't realize, wait a second, Syzoth right? The lizard knew. About the mistletoe at Christmas?! No, it was Johnny who told him! Who cares! He kisses me!!!! What will I feel when he puts his forked tongue in my mouth? Well, that's for a future story, who knows? We will take the next step in the New Year

​

[doidarespeak]

so my brother is getting kicked out. family i've barely had back in life for a couple years. the only family that treats me, knows and likes me, for me. he can't work, or can only work very specific jobs which he hasn't been able to do, even with his back surgery. fuck the construction company that won't pay him his settlement that got him injured in the first place. he was broke, but his place wasn't kicking him out. a little cash app here and there to keep him afloat. Maybe if i got paid enough i could get moved and get a place so at least I know he was secured and safe in that respect.

and then this dumbass escalated an altercation which sure as shit was him flashing his weapons at someone he shouldn't have, which is the perfect excuse for the complex to kick out a non/low pay tenant.

And I'm furious. I shouldn't be but I am. he was safe! he wasn't in the hot summer sun, he had a roof and his dog and food and water and just had to hold a little while longer and that's out the window. maybe he didn't have the right meds anymore, maybe old anger and paranoia issues popped up. I'm trying to not be angry about it, but i'm pretty sure i have the same issues to.

I'm tired of my set and forget ways, "if it's not my problem forget it, it'll disappear eventually." And i've have had to do this for years, whether because of Jehovah's Witness bull shit or just my own shit personality. And I've been trying so hard to fix this. Just be conversationalist, make new friends, let people ebb and flow out of your life

and it's just been shit. I'm tired of people just ebbing and flowing out. every time i get someone new i want to stick around they end being gone. and i don't want that any more. I want to keep people around, i want people in my life! and my life won't let me have that unless i go to the ends of the earth for people, or I end up pushing them away before I do. I thought stopped pushing people away. thought i ended that when i restarted my life at 24. and it's just not gotten better

I have the same 2-3 people that have a physical, tangible form. not just a good figment at the end of internet forum, and it's like i can't even keep them around. i keep gettign moves delayed, friends going to other countries, and me trying to tamp down parasocial relationships i know are going nowhere. just worry about me and let life take it's course

which brings back here. I've did it before, i don't give much a shit about the rest of my family. they don't want me, they want the fake person i presented to them for years just to survive. But lyman wants me as I am, and i'm in no position to properly help him. So what do i do, set and forget, hope he goes quick or just decides to be on his own, cut him off? Risk us both being homeless and financially ruined trying to get him out of another state? give up my dreams that have been continually dashed again and again and again due to my own mental health and general ineptness. I'm such a dumb person who can't handle anything and any time i think I may be too, any time i think i've made that progress

it gets thrown in the trash

the darkest parts of me i've tried so hard to erase and and destroy, just want him gone, i don't want to worry about him, i just want to run away like any other stupid problem

but i don't want too, but what else can do i do

just a shit tier person through and through i suppose