#and it's heartwarming how it comes across as a message from sonic team
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beevean · 7 months ago
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Sonic Frontiers
One Way Dream
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heroquills-a · 6 years ago
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@crimsonxblur: (x)
      As soon as things had begun quieting down, he’d made his way back to work without much thought. As inclined as he was to indulge in the unexpectedly warm welcome he’d gotten from people - or most of them, anyway - he still had a lot to deal with in terms of making up for his absence. Notably, after being effectively chewed out by the commander, he’d been sentenced to ten hours of surveillance duty for ever single call he’d missed, that he had to serve during night shifts when things were especially calm and boring, and during which any contact with his team was forbidden.
     Not the brightest of perspectives, but Shadow knew he couldn’t expect his little disappearing stunt to be without consequences. If anything, he hoped to get this particular obligation out of the way as soon as possible, hence his prompt return to headquarters. Or so he gave as an excuse for his somewhat early arrival; in truth, his last encounter of the night had left him too stunned to think of anything else he could do with himself - not to say too hurt.
     As it turned out, doing nothing but staring at a bunch of screens depicting various locations where nothing is happening for hours on end wasn’t ideal when he wanted to avoid torturing himself with wondering what the hell it was that even happened back there. And with every few people who came into the room to share the duty for some time shooting him disapproving glances, the answer came as rather obvious: he’d done something wrong.
     A shame that he had to go and mess this up, really; he’d been in a good mood, what with having a good talk with Zero, a heartwarming reunion with Silver, and hearing from Omega for the first time in weeks. When seeing Sonic on the scene, he’d had nothing in mind but the hero’s letter and the fact that he was legitimately happy to see him - enough to forget why he’d even left in the first place.
     That had been his mistake, clearly. That blinding, momentary joy that had led him to bare his heart even after getting advice that had rubbed him the wrong way; Sonic hadn’t hesitated even one second to stab and twist the knife before running away.
     You had it coming, he told himself repeatedly that night, flicking some black pen up the slightly inclined desk and watching it roll back down only to be sent up again. He couldn’t just ask that Sonic be honest with him, that he fully express himself around him no matter how harsh his thoughts might get, without expecting the speedster to strike at Shadow’s own faults eventually. He should have been prepared for this.
     He hadn’t been, because all this time he’d slowly let himself believe that maybe - with everything that had transpired between them recently - just maybe there was more than spite and resentment and rivalry between them. But apparently, that had been part of the hero’s act, and Shadow had actually fallen for it.
     He caught the tormented pen when his phone buzzed, and a second later gave off a light that caught both his and his current coworker’s attention. He frowned seeing the name that showed up on the screen, gritting his teeth as he flipped the device over to hide it without checking the received message. Except the vibration kept going, three more times in fact, and a bad feeling sank in.
     When the man next to him stood up and excused himself out of the room - failing at being subtle that he was going to see his superior to probably report that Shadow was communicating with his team - the remaining agent gave in and bypassed his phone’s lock screen to see just what it was Sonic had to say to him this late at night after their earlier exchange. Surely it couldn’t make him any more miserable than he already was, right ?
     Reading the texts left Shadow more numb than he’d managed to be for a long time now. It was like they emptied him of any emotion or care he might have had left for this whole situation after picking it apart for hours. Apparently, someone had just put his mask back on and regretted having taken it off. Fuck off, he wanted to text back. But even that didn’t sound very satisfying. Not any more than ignoring it like he had everything else. Or accepting the apology like it was no big deal.
     With a sigh, he got up and headed for the door, which opened just as he was reaching for the handle to reveal his earlier coworker returning. Perfect timing. “I’m going out,” he announced without much ceremony, and slipped past the other agent before he could voice any protest or question or complaint.
     Shadow made a detour his team’s little locker room to grab a jacket before exiting out the back door from where he could easily climb up on the roof of the building. From there it was a long walk to get to the front of it, even more so when trying to ignore his phone and those messages burning a hole in his pocket. Only upon arriving at his targeted vantage point did he aim to grab it again, except he reached for something else instead - something he’d forgotten he’d left in this specific jacket.
     Oh. Might as well, he thought, pulling out the package of cigarettes. Nicotine wasn’t nearly strong enough to affect his system in any way (and it was a damn shame - he could use its intended effect in situations like these), but something about smoking could still calm his nerves at times, even if it was very minor. And so he lit one up without further thinking, letting the sight of the exhaled clouds of smoke soothe what little they could.
     A thought occurred to him then, one that had echoed in his mind just the same a few days ago. Everything goes away. He’d gotten what he wanted. Whatever it was that had been nurturing between him and Sonic recently, he’d effectively killed it now. By not allowing it to grow for long enough, he’d pretty much ripped it out root and stem, it seemed. Why ? Why was this what he wanted ? It certainly didn’t feel good.
     Because it was the right thing to do, he’d convinced himself. It felt wrong, but what was right never felt right to him. He wasn’t hardwired to do the right thing, it didn’t come naturally to him - at least not anymore, if it ever had. He had to believe it was right, even if his instincts and emotions and impressions screamed the opposite.
     He sat down on the edge of the roof, inhaling another puff and looking out the quiet but lit up city before he picked up his phone with his free hand to look at those messages again. How dishonest and fake those few words sounded after what Sonic had said to his face earlier. Did I ruin what we had ? Or did it never exist ?
     If anything, it bugged him that the hero would even bother sending him this. What was he hoping to accomplish ? He knew Shadow didn’t care for his act. He never had, and he did even less now that he’d gotten a glimpse of what Sonic really thought of him. Why was he pretending to care again ? Something felt off, and not just the fact that the speedster had sent him this even closer to dawn than his usual late-night texts.
     Something was wrong, and it wasn’t the kind of gut feeling Shadow could just shake off by reminding himself his morals were questionable and that he couldn’t trust himself with his own impressions. Eyes rose to scan over the scenery again, as if he might discern some tangible reason for distress or worry if he looked hard enough. Flickering lights, an alarm going off, or just the brief flash of a blue blur - anything that could justify this undeniably growing concern of his.
     But the city stayed still, and he was forced down the path to another conclusion. To the fact that he’d made a promise, regardless of how involved he was. To the realization that he cared, even if it hurt.
     Shadow dropped the unfinished cig, crushing it with an open palm, and with both hands now free, he texted back three simple words.
     ‘are you okay ?’
He was drifting in between awareness and unconscious. A state where Sonic felt he were on the edge of a steep cliff, that floating feeling you get when you’re very high up and everything on the ground feels hundreds of miles away.
He’d finally ran himself empty, all his energy finally depleted enough to not even have the will to let his thoughts chase him anymore. Sonic wasn’t even quite sure where he was right now. He knew he ran and ran and pushed himself at full speed till he could feel the first ripple of exhaustion hit him, lungs aching from the strain. Instinct told him to find somewhere sheltered, so he took to the first building in his sights- he assumed it was a barn, and snuck on in. He found a place high up in the rafters, and while it wasn’t exactly an ideal place to crash, he felt perfectly hidden. Nobody would see him now. He could drown in his exhaustion and complications in peace without judgement.
The muffled sounds of barn animals shuffling and sighing in their own nests down below somehow brought on a sense of serenity to the hedgehog’s state of being. He didn’t care much for the smell, but at this point Sonic couldn’t even bring himself to care. He was tired.
Cold moonlight shown through the windows around him, somewhat illuminating the dust particles that floated through the air with a soft glow and casting long shadows behind the long planks of wood stretching across the ceiling. The hero made sure to tuck himself into the darkest corner he could find, and before he knew it he felt too exhausted to even climb back down. Curled up on his side, he hazily watched the floating specs of animal dandruff float through the air, almost dreamlike. Eventually he’d let his eyes finally close while Sonic said goodbye to the waking world, and had been on the edge of completely blacking out.
That was, until a buzzing noise rattled loudly next to him, volume amplified by the wide plank of wood he nested on, rudely jolted him back into awareness. Sonic sits up with a start, head pounding but not nearly as hard as his heart was. It hurt, admittedly. Sonic lets out a pained hiss and pushes the palms of his hands against his eyes in a vain attempt to sooth the throbbing that assaulted his skull, teeth gritting with intense annoyance at whatever just ruined his blissful state. 
Sighing shakily when the ache finally dulled down, hands shuffle against the plank and the underside of his jacket, searching for the source of the disturbance. When he found it, the speedster rolls onto his back with a groan and squints at the offending light source that shines from his phone screen. He was planning to simply just turn the thing off completely, but when the name on the lockscreen came into focus, that plan was quickly forgotten. 
He didn’t think he’d get an answer.
Nor did he think he’d get the one he did.
Sonic has to re-read the words written across the several times before he can finally process the question, and has to think for several minutes before he can actually begin to form an answer.
Are you okay?
It was a simple question. Just three words, but not any three words he’d expect from the person on the other side of the screen. Especially not after the last exchange they had. It hardly felt like any concern he deserved from his rival, so it left Sonic in a state of confused disbelief. Why would Shadow be wondering if he was okay?
Icy tears of exhaustion leak from the corners of his eyes and down the sides of his cheek while he scanned the message again- perhaps searching for some kind of explanation for this written in the text. But none came, and his eyes burned and blurred, forcing the hedgehog to blink several times and rub them with the back of his hand.
Another wave of pain racked against the inside of his head, not as intense this time, but enough to make the hero wince. He didn’t think he even had it in him to try and question how Shadow knew something wasn’t right. He was too tired. Too tired to force any optimism or put on any front. His answer came surprisingly easy to him when he finally focused his vision enough to tap his thumbs against the screen. The honesty in his response almost didn’t feel real to him, further establishing the feeling of being trapped inside a dreamlike trance- as if he were a spirit hovering over his body. Completely out of it, and no will to lie anymore.
[Text]: Youre asking me that?
[Text]: No not really
[Text]: Are you?
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