#and it won't be mai bc she can move on and know her worth actually

[againwiththeturtles]

not to step back into atla shipping discussions. but maiko will forever be strange & odd to me as a ship. not just because of the horrible gay repressed energy they're both giving off, but because after the big dramatic love confession that mai gives zuko in the boiling rock, zuko fucking forgets she is in there. she got thrown into prison for him and getting her out was low as fuck on his priority list. even if he didnt fully forget, he put off getting her out when he was the actual legal firelord until her uncle just did it for him. no excuses, if he was in love with her he would not be able to shut up about how she committed treason for him and he needs to rescue her now but he does not give a FUCK.

[makingshortstorieslong]

.

[daisychains111]

live "tweet" books with me (via the Goodreads progress bar) pt.3 Iron Flame by Rebecca Yarros

Live tweeting as I read...back by popular demand (literally 1 person on Tumblr (@dumpsters-little-matchbook) asked me to do it again and I was already planning to)

stay strong Vi....just bc he's hot doesn't mean he's redeemed himself for his (understandably) traitorous ways

"she's worth a dozen of me" Xanden you shut up right now I'm mad at you

I'm glad Brennen's alive but I do not trust him at all...pretending to be dead for 6 years is fishy as fuck

hashtag: Andarna protection club...if anything ever happens to that dragon I'll burn the world

violet "I know more than you" sorrengail back in action

lol Brennen making fun of her love life

petition for violet and sgaeyl mother-daughter bonding

awww andarna, all growed up

moody teenage angst Andarna is the comedic relief we all didn't know we needed...nothing is as iconic as her growling at Violet for calling her my dearest

idk if Tairn signed up to be the sole father figure to two teenage girls but Violet and Andarna are about to give him a run for his money

he deserves not to trust Dain bc Dain is the scum of the earth

RIDOC AND RHIONNAN ARE SAFE AND ALIVE EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT IN THE WORLD

call his lying ass out Violet as you should

slay violets mom with the redeeming qualities...glad she actually cared if Violet was alive and isn't completely a heartless bitch

fuck dain but also FUCK HIS DAD

the fact that it's him who officially outs them makes me smile hehe

I agree Nadine...that was hot

Xaden being an absolute tease flirt bc she's mad at him is iconic

YAY SQUAD LEADER RHI!!!

the joke was funny, your friends ate just lame (jk I love them but still)

THE PRINCE???

awwww Liam's sister you better make it across istfg

noooo I wanted to be friends with Sloane

violet in her older sister era

gotta love the "is everyone I care about alive? yes? slay" moment

the fact that even tairn is warry of the orange dragon freaks me out

tairn reporting for fatherly duties will never not be my favorite...violet may be annoying but she's his annoying

I'm all for the Violet and Imogen friendship but they better not be mean to Rhiannan

also if Rhiannan gets annoying and jealous about them I'll be really sad

nooo I liked Nadine...who tf just snaps people's necks like that tf

Xaden warding her room so he's the only person who can come in COMEDY

SIMP

hehehe he wrote her a letterrr

violet lying to everyone about her feelings about Xaden except Tairn is so funny...like who's the dragon gonna tell

Xaden is winning every award ever rn bc 1. he's hot as hell, but 2. he's like I wanna sleep with you so bad, but I won't bc it's for the wrong reasons....honorable mf

literally FUCK VARRISH

Sloane needs to get her shit together and Violet needs to stop avoiding her friends

I'm like 80% sure they just got drugged but slay ig

called it...they were totally drugged

tairn comforting Violet about missing Xaden even though Tairn is the one with the bonded mate thing isn't being talked about enough

I would really love to know what those letters say...just saying, sharing is caring

I want to trust jesinia...I really do but it gives me a bad feeling

you let my babies see each other istg...violet is actively moving towards miserable without him

Imogen is slowly becoming the biggest violet/Xander fangirl and I love that for her

give it up Imogen...yall are friends

girlie just wants to be back in a library fr

period Rhiannan...don't put up with Xaden's shit....you threaten him like a bestie should

If Rhi and Violet don't stay friends I'll riot

ooooo don't mess with Tairn's kids...he'll bring that dad defensive

I'm so glad Violet is letting Rhiannan in..be besties again pls

HAHA "SHOWING OFF (MAKING OUT)" IN FRONT OF MIRA....ICONIC

"omg your falling for him" No matter how many times I hear that I'm media I will always be a sucker for it

"you're my only sibling" REALLY MAKING VIOLET SEEM LIKE A TERRIBLE PERSON FOR NOT TELLING MIRA ABOUT BRENNEN....UNCALLED FOR

tik tok says she finally just fucking forgives him in chapter 27... we're on 20, kick into gear people

at her core, Violet is really just like me fr.... 21-year-old girlie pop vibes for the win

 damn the disdain for Dian is STRONG

Rhiannan wins the bestie of the year award....being the best even tho Violet is being a fuckass about not telling her things

DAIN FIGHTING ISNT GONNA DO MUCH BC YOU DONT DESERVE HER AND NOW EVERYONE GETS TO WATCH AS SHE BEATS YOUR ASS

see, I knew her mom was a bitch

Rhiannan and violets friendship rn makes me so sad

This aaric dude better keep his mouth SHUT

really looking forward to Xaden beating the shit out of Dain for the shit he just pulled

besties having beef in private...which honestly I feel like will be a good thing

"that isn't a secret" I love ridoc....also Violet why tf would you think that's a valid secret

them getting graded for withstanding torture is WILD

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BRING DAIN INTO THIS VARRISH YOU BITCH

VARRISH YOU ABSOLUTE MOTHERFUCKER...I DESPISE YOUR SOUL

I hate dain to but I love him for that...thank you for being a rule-following asshat

two things: tairn constantly being like "duh your fine, I make great choices" is so sweet but absolutely hilarious....and Rhiannan being a slay icon is my favorite thing

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN JACK IS BACK FROM THE ACTUAL DEAD....SHUT UP RIGHT NOW

I'm so ready to watch the Fab 4 (I've decided that I'm calling ridoc, rhi, sawyer, and Violet this bc they are so slay) kill jack again bc wtf

YES CHAPTER 27 I'VE HEARD GOOD THINGS ABOUT YOU

watch Mira walk in on them right now...that'd be so freaking funny

tairn and Violet's father-daughter bonding is my fave

tairn is a grade-A overprotective father... it's adorable

no literally....tairn is so over her 21 bullshit...I love them

I have no recollection of who Kaori is...but him standing up to varrish makes him my favorite

YES YES YES LET FAB 3/4 KNOW ALL THE SECRETS

ridoc having the vibes to give violet a hard time while his world was just flipped on its head is why I love him

also shout out to Imogen and Quinn bc yall are slay too

why did Jack save her life...go back to being an ass, not sucky jack is frightening

"argue with you about books? I only pick fights I can win" Xaden clearly knows his place

literally just sobbing at the Liam cameo

why does Varrish keep responding to Liam...is Violet talking out loud or like did he pull a jack

damn dain is just...redeeming himself...didn't have that on my 2024 bingo card

her mom redeeming herself too? damn we're on a redemption roll

very serious war book until someone says something like "show off" during an important meeting (cough garrick cough) and you remember that these bitches are in their 20s

Brennan, Xaden, and tairn: violet protection squad

ANDARNAS BACK YYYAAAYYY

YUH SLAY FOURTH WING

flame section is the iron section? One might say they're the iron flame....wink wink

patiently waiting for a sorrengail sibling reunion...pls bring Mira into the loop

YES MIRA BEAT HIS ASS

Mira beating the shit out of Brennan, Violet yelling at them to grow tf up, and ultimately Mira and Brennen rebonding over the ickiness of xaden/violet pda...the best sibling reunion EVER

"I have control" girl be so for real rn...the only time you use your power is when you're mid-orgasm, you're not controlling shit

Mira and Xaden being "let's overprotect violet" partners in crime...straight vibes

Andarna: The Hungry One (trademark)

oooooooo violets in trooouubbblleeee

jealous Violet storyline is about to be just as stupid as I'm keeping my friends safe by distancing myself Violet storyline

oh God not talking in 3rd person

"I wasn't in love with you then," *jim halpert camera stare* stfu xaden

DAMMMMNNNNN he's def being annoying but saying he's acting like dain is looooooowwwww

yeah cat just stfu...violet is better than you don't be a bitch

YOU WEAR YOUR HAIR DOWN VIOLET...TORTURE HIM BUT ISTG IF YOU LET HIM GET AWAY WITH THAT BS....

YESSS Liam mentions make me so happy...also I'm so ready for Violet and Sloane to bond

dain just bc you saved her doesn't mean you're not on extremely thin ice...stfu

HA, a length joke...I like Maren

IF YOU KILL RIDOC RIGHT NOW REBECCA, I WILL HAUNT YOU

HES SAFE....fab 4 lives another day

cat's a bitch...that's all

Cat's a bitch...but you know who isn't? Rhiannan. gave her bestie the best fighting skills

well that's one way to combat jealousy

he really said "You were annoying and emotional last year, this year it's my turn" Live laugh love healthy relationships

fab 4 are my favorite group of fantasy besties ever....icons..every single one of them

I'm very very excited for the Sawyer and Jesinia subplot...also I don't think I'm opposed to a Dain redemption arch, he just needs to learn his place

"I might even be in love with him after that declaration" HA game recognizes game dain, love that for you

ROLL CREDITS

Garrick doesn't get enough credit for being just as awesome as Rhi....slay besties

girlie pop bickering with a side of danger mission and dragon obedience school...my favorite

HAH grammar jokes

 "I get the feeling that this '2nd signet' thing is gonna be a BIG issue...like the plot twist that ends the book BIG

tbh I feel like I don't know him either so I get why she's mad at him

BRUUUUHHH he redeems himself with the "less than a minute" comment

tairn is girl dad...yelling at Violet and Andarna for their shit, yelling at Xaden for talking to Violet...girl dad icon

"Mom and Dad are fighting" See tairn and Sgaeyl are Mom and Dad

poor mama sorrengail...that's not the best way to break that news brennen you bitch

I'm really hoping Violet gets iron squad to go help bc them leaving the others to die is bullshit

they mentioned that the venin had runes, but they were confused as to how. cat is the best at them, and I really really really don't like how sus that is

everyone is so over Violet and her friends bc they're the only ones saying true things

YUH IRON SQUAD...my favorite squad of besties

FUCKING JACK

that was the most stressful thing ever read in my life...if Rhiannan dies I will never recover

I thought Sawyer was going to die and I started crying

YES ANDARNA BE SPECIAL AND SLAY

The fact the andarna hatched just for Violet is so sweet

you better not fucking sacrifice yourself right now violet unknownmiddlename sorrengail

DUMBASS

rip mama sorrengail...this was the redemption arch you deserved

violet breaking down to Rhi is EVERYTHING

FAB 4 LIVES TO SEE ANOTHER DAY (along with Imogen, Quinn, Sloane, Jesinia, Aaric, Maren, and Cat because yall bitches grew on me)

yay xaden's safe, was worried for a bit

IM SORRY WHAT NOW

I'M SORRY WHAT NOW

saying that xaden cant feel sgaeyl better be a fucking joke rn

FUCKING JACK

[koishua]

UNFORGIVEN ALBUM REVIEW

i have so much to say about these tracks y'all the wait was worth it it always is when it's with them!! UNFORGIVEN as a title track slaps i can't overstate how amazing this turned out thank you nile rodgers this is incredible i adore the beats though i wish that for the "unforgiven girls" part, the vocals were stronger in volume and impression bc it's SUCH a hype section i can already imagine ceremonies starting with that exact part!! the melody just evokes that feeling if you know what i mean?? and yunjin's grungy voice compliments this song and its message so so well. also kkura's deep voice?? she is an icon she has always been the moment but oml zuha's wings and her lines are SO good i won't even start talking about chaewon bc y'all know how i feel about her gosh she never ever disappoints. now for manchae oml she has come so far from fearless and she's getting better and better each comeback and she's starting to solidify her presence on stage im so excited for five years down the line how she's going to turn out!! the choreo snippet from knowing bros had already surprised me so much i love love love their choreos and this one has to be one of my top threes?? anyways not to get too deep into this so im going to just keep it like this and move on. overall 9.5/10

NO-RETURN (INTO THE UNKNOWN) — the bass!! they have a signature feel-good sound to their tracks similar to this you just want to get up and jump or dance around with a smile on your face. the saxophone is that a saxophone in the chorus that took me off guard in the best way really. the brass is so cnncncbc!! chaewon and yunjin carry the vocal heavy parts and they do it amazingly like they may not be the strongest vocalists ever but they're strong in their own ways that fit le sserafim's sound so well!! overall 9/10

EVE, PSYCHE & THE BLUEBEARD'S WIFE — i know a club song when i hear one despite not ever being in one 😔😔 the beat im salivating this is my three am hallucinating dancing in the dark in my own room type of song i swear to you the verses after the first chorus has me in a chokehold. the things i would do to get to listen to this in a concert setting and ascend with the bridge and then the drum pads that come in right after like stfu. overall 9/10

FEARNOT (BETWEEN YOU, ME, AND THE LAMPPOST) — i just started writing a small fic based on this song and its vibes!! this makes me feel all sorts of things and the lyrics are straight out of a heartwarming story. this is one of my most favourite songs from this album. it's so atmospheric with the electric guitar building up to the chorus and the drum beats that kick in and their vocals. the melody is beautiful and i just can't get over the vibes. i cried while i first listened to this half an hour ago actually ;-; i don't have any single thing to complain about in this song. "i go where you go" line being given to chaewon was an amazing decision because her voice is so pure and it felt like i was pulled into another world for the brief moment she sung with the background going silent :') i think this will be one of my most listened to songs on spotify this year. overall 10/10

FLASH FORWARD — this is exactly my vibe i listen to these kinds of songs everyday all day it's just so vibey and you can strut playfully to this song down the street and sway and jam all you want and it feels like flowers of all bright colours are blooming all around you as you go!! it's like it brightens up the world around each step you take :< it's just feel-good. overall 9/10

FIRE IN THE BELLY — when i say hot damn i want to shake my hips and call my latina friends and have them listen to this. the chorus makes something in my chest feel so full with life!! reminds me of my childhood especially the olé olé olé in the background chants ugh im a little tired from all of the jumping and screeching i did within the last hour so my brain is slowing down just know that it's overall a 9/10 for me for this too

CONCLUSION i love them they occupy a large spot in my heart i can't ever dislike any song they release and i know it seems like im giving way too many compliments but i can't help it idc if it's subjective they just make good ass music ‼️

[roublardise]

J'ai publié 12 604 fois en 2022

366 billets créés (3%)

12 238 billets reblogués (97%)

Les blogs que j'ai le plus reblogués :

@knifelesbianjo

@nicomrade

@xofemeraldstars

@roublardise

J'ai étiqueté 10 168 billets en 2022

Seulement 19% de mes billets ne comportaient pas de tag

#spn - 6 075 billets

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#sapphicnatural - 812 billets

#dean winchester - 663 billets

#castiel - 290 billets

#art - 251 billets

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#cxgf - 182 billets

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Longest Tag: 140 characters

#reputation by taylor swift obvsly / chromatica by lady gaga / en cas de tempête ce jardin sera fermé by coeur de pirate / mozart l'opéra roc

Mes billets vedette en 2022 :

n°5

Dean Winchester - Killing Boys

“Since he died..” Dean starts hesitantly, “I’ve been having nightmares, as you heard. But also these.. these kinds of flashes and memories coming back. Stuff I had no idea about but stuff which fucked me up, you know?” The words are still getting stuck in his throat and he has to force them out to keep going. “It’s not just some daddy issues about growing up hunting and seeking revenge, and learning how to build a gun before you know how to count. There’s.. more. And Sam can’t get it. And it’s okay, I’m not gonna tell him - who knows if he’ll even believe me. But there’s a distance between us now. I want a distance to be there. Because I can’t keep up, I can’t breathe if he’s too close to me.” “So you’re hunting… him ?” “Yeh.” “To breathe?” “To be free.”

extract from my fic You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect

95 notes - publié le 24 janvier 2022

n°4

click for quality!

true form Anna/Ruby anyone? for @spnprideweek - day 4 - wlw/joy

TO THE GARDENS OF LOVE

she tells me: our deadbeat fathers - gods or lucifers when they thread their so-called destiny made us creatures of greed and feathers - not worth mortality

she learned poetry from trees and beating hearts a fruit from a soil which would nurture nothing in Heaven alas, she sighs, a few allegories never killed anyone let alone an angel

it's a tragedy alike those of the Greeks we only move and forget, never forgive and repeat one can not be alive in the infinite

I tell her: devoted hustlers - gods or reapers crushed me into black ashes one could only hold through a stolen skin, a slough that would never stick

those roots that you crave, they threw me away with their trash from a soul to empty bones to cut on a rack seeds for an Eden of apathy labeled some demon witch something - never someone

it's a romance, don't your Greeks have these? we may live and forget, I won't pack any regret I've only been alive with you to cherish

I plead: can't you see? we're creatures of lust and fire! free from faithless submission!

what could Thanatos give that we can't create in the space between the stars and the salt of the seas flowing into your grace I found humanity and we got enough love to spend eternity

95 notes - publié le 26 juin 2022

n°3

do you guys know about dean and castiel like they're for real best friends and they're in love-

114 notes - publié le 2 décembre 2022

n°2

why would anyone think cas is the only man dean is attracted to have you watched the show.

122 notes - publié le 5 mars 2022

Mon billet n°1 en 2022

you don't understand the roadhouse episode is about dean starting to flirt with jo but it's not really succeeding not bc of being turned down but BC he's not feeling it, he can't keep faking. literally starts and can't go through. he's tired. and yeh it could be simple legit "he's not feeling it bc he's grieving" BUT THEN you have Ash.

it's an episode about dean not wanting, turning down, a woman. all while actually flirting with a man. his dad is dead and his posture is falling down. he's going for it he digs the haircut. they drink from the same bottle.

it's about dean rejecting jo and his comphet and embracing openly/in front of sam his homosexuality in this essay i will-

184 notes - publié le 14 janvier 2022

Obtenez votre année 2022 en revue sur Tumblr →

[inheritedthrowaway]

hi it's op. some more info, since we now know A LITTLE BIT more and I'm not as completely out of it as I was when I submitted this:

-to all of the people saying to get a lawyer: I promise I wasn't trying to come here for legal advice lol. tbh I kinda figured that that would be something we would have to do. I've returned home, but Phineas told me before that his close friend offered to set him up with a lawyer for this situation, so I'll let him know to get on that when he's able. unfortunately, the stress of everything + his job has been keeping him somewhat unavailable, but if what some people in the notes is saying is true, I guess this was always gonna be a long process anyway. its been less than 3 weeks since it happened, tbh looking back I'm surprised we've done as much as we have.

-but on that note I was less worried about the legal side than the moral side. truly Phineas and I are down for whatever she is ok with us doing that we are legally able to do--except paying our dad's portion of the debt, bc we definitely can't afford to do that. it turns out they still owe like, more than half of what the house is worth, and it's a house in a major city on the West Coast so that's A LOT. so the point is kinda moot anyway bc it wouldn't really make much difference if we gave her anything bc we could not afford to come close to covering that anyway. so the actual question of if we'd be assholes, I guess, is No, bc we can't anyway.

-the more concrete monetary situation is this: myself, Phineas and Aaron were the 3 beneficiaries of his life insurance, splitting it even 3 ways (I was told I get 34%, so I assume they each get 33%). I won't share the exact amount here, I'll just say: it's less than a quarter million, but it's got 6 digits. which like. when I heard the number I almost threw up. I saw some in the notes saying "uh 5 figures isn't exactly life-changing." y'all, my partner and I each make under $20k a year. we live paycheck-to-paycheck. any amount that is more than a years salary (or hell, even HALF that) is gonna be life changing in some way for us, even if that change is "we can now afford to move to a different apartment if we need to".

-(since Aaron is underage and can't legally enter a financial contract, his mom will probably be in charge of what happens to his share. not sure there's much we can do about that but hopefully she does the right thing and puts it in a CD or whatever till he's of age)

-we still never did find a will, but other than the money in his bank account (probably not a lot, considering his bills), the trailer and the half of a house, my dad didn't really own anything that would be worth fighting over (his vehicle was completely destroyed in the wreck). its mostly all things like clothes, the furniture in the trailer, multimedia stuff, etc, nothing else with like deeds or official ownership or whatever. Phineas and I have been pretty much on the same page regarding everything to do with his estate so far in abstract, so idk how much a lawyer needs to be involved in figuring out who gets his Big Bang Theory DVDs. but we probably will add it to the list anyway, cuz the dude was kinda a hoarder and has 2 storage units and a shed we need to go through so who KNOWS what he's got put away.

-to the one person in the notes shaming me for "writing his cheating off as polyamory" or whatever: as I said in the post I am literally polyamorous myself and I'm not excusing his actions, but I am calling it like I see it. he was absolutely a cheater about it I just don't want people getting the impression that he was some gross womanizing asshole, cuz he wasn't. my dad may have been stupid but he wasn't like, a piece of shit for fun.

anyway the whole situation has been incredibly exhausting and I get the feeling the paperwork has only just begun. in my defense I've never had to deal with the legal side of somebody dying before, so I'll fully admit I don't know what I'm doing lol. thanks for the feedback, I'll probably leave this account up for like a month or something if anybody has further questions and/or advice.

@am-i-the-asshole-official

here's a wild one for y'all. cw for parental death. names have been changed, it is a kinda specific situation but I think only 1 of my family members is on Tumblr so whatever. sorry it got so long, it's a complicated situation and still VERY fresh so my brain is kinda fried lol.

tldr my dad passed away without a will and we want to give his long-distance "side" gf the house he helped her buy. I'm worried she won't be able to afford the mortgage, but don't really want to give her any of the monetary payouts. WIBTA if my brothers and I kept all of the cash?

so late last week (it's Dec 19 as of submitting) my father (60s M) passed away in a sudden car accident on his way to work. I'm (late 20s ftM) his oldest child, I also have a younger brother (mid 20s M) who we'll call Phineas and an even younger half-brother (almost tween, M) who we'll call Aaron.

so I'd describe my dad as a kind and loving but stubborn and stupid man. I would also guess, based on what I know of his love life, that he was polyamorous but didn't realize it due to his conservative Christian upbringing and didn't know it was an option so instead ended up being...well, kinda an adulterer tbh. this isn't to excuse his actual actions bc they were obviously wrong, but is the way the situation reads to me, a polyamorous person.

Dad had a long distance girlfriend (50s??? maybe??? F) on the West Coast (we live near the East Coast), we'll call her Melody. I met her a few years back when he flew Phineas and I with him to visit her. she's a sweet woman from what I know of her. when I got the news of his passing, I was the one who called her to let her know what happened. (which sucked.)

well, what I Didn't know until I was trying to scrape together travel arrangements (I live 5 hours away from Phineas and my dad) was that he also had a Wife (60sF), who we'll call Patricia. (it wasn't a legal marriage, it was "in the eyes of the Lord" as they said, due to legal complications to do with her social security benefits or something. which is why the arrangements for his death fell onto Phineas and I as his adult children. but if he called her his wife then as far as I'm concerned that's what she is.) he didn't really tell me or Phineas about the full nature of their relationship. Phineas found out bc our dad was spending so much time with her that he'd practically moved in w her, put two and two together and asked her to confirm. I never even knew she existed till all this happened. he had told his parents and siblings about her, and they approved of her. we can only speculate why he kept it so quiet to us, she thinks bc of his history with Real Duds that we'd be upset somehow. idk.

so anyway Patricia knew about Melody. my dad was already seeing Melody when he started seeing Patricia. I don't know what he was thinking when he got with Patricia tbh, can't ask him now anyway, but she knew about Melody the whole time. wasn't thrilled about it, constantly told him he needed to tell her the truth and end things, but doesn't truly hold that against Melody herself bc she didn't know.

Melody, however, did not know about Patricia. he was planning to tell her at some point. kept meaning to. still loved her, didn't wanna hurt her, but was also trying to be monogamously committed to Patricia too. he never got around to actually ending things with Melody before he passed, and as far as she knew he was still planning to move out there and get married to her. he even took out a loan to help her pay for her late mother's house, both their names are on the mortgage and deed.

which brings me to my question. my dad didn't seem to have a will (not that we can find anyway), so Phineas and I are the ones in charge of distributing his various belongings and payouts and such. we both agree that we don't have any use for some house across the country, and Melody is already living in it anyway. imo she should just Have It. however, she is also Pretty Poor. I don't know the specifics of her situation (or, really, much about the complications of home ownership?) but I do worry about her ability to continue to pay the mortgage, assuming that's a thing. we're still waiting to hear about all the details and numbers and have somebody who actually knows about that stuff translate it into layman's terms for us non-homeowners (or in Phineas's case, Brand New Homeowner) so we can get a full picture of how all that is going to work legally speaking.

Dad also had life insurance thru his employer. we are still working thru the red tape at his company to figure out who the beneficiary is, the most likely candidate being me as the eldest child. Phineas and I are agreed that we'll at least be splitting most, if not all, the money evenly between us and Aaron. Patricia is INSISTENT that she doesn't want any of it, she wants us kids to keep it bc unlike some of his exes she never cared about his money (he made GOOD money, but still ended up kinda poor due to both being generous to, and having been taken advantage of by, multiple women since my bio mom died. including having to shell out an insane amount of child support for Aaron despite already having a very active role in his life. like he paid more child support than either I or my fiancee even make at our jobs, while also frequently just straight up directly providing for him where he could). because of his income it's looking like a pretty hefty payout.

however, my brother and I are both pretty poor as well. while we don't know the exact amount we're getting, some are speculating a number that, even split 3 ways, would be Life-Changing for us. we're talking 5 figure amounts, more than I or my fiancee make in a year. like we'll still need to work for a living but, for example, it could be a down-payment on a house or a massive safety net for when I'm out of work (I have a steady job but with seasonal unpaid breaks). it could help Phineas afford expensive repairs for the trailer he now owns, which my dad was supposed to help pay for. in the right account with a decent interest rate, it could be tuition for when Aaron goes to college.

I feel like I Should probably toss some of that money Melody's way, esp since I feel so bad that she's getting the one-two punch of finding out her bf died AND also he had a wife she wasn't aware of. but my brothers and I could really use that money as well. I don't know that Phineas wants to send her any, we're saving that conversation for when we know more of the exact numbers. I don't even know how much Dad was paying towards it, or if he even was anymore. plus--and this is kinda a minor detail--but there's kind of a general vibe I'm getting from the Family (ALL 4 of my dad's siblings AND both his parents are somehow still alive) that Melody is kinda...unliked. they love Patricia and were CONSTANTLY frustrated that he was still visiting Melody and frequently sending her money; I get the feeling they viewed her the same as some of his other gold-digging exes so i think maybe sending her Even More Money would look a little weird? like she's already getting full ownership of a house out of the deal. most of them are in agreement that Phineas and I are the ones who get the final say on the bulk of these decisions but they're...a little pushy anyway.

like I said, we don't know what any of the actual numbers look like AT ALL yet, so it might actually be fine. but WIBTA if we just left her the sole homeowner when she couldn't really afford it, and not send her any money? the consensus will probably show up too late to affect our decision but hey, figured the situation would make for a wild ride anyway (or maybe I just feel like that bc it has been for me LOL).

What are these acronyms?

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

Terezi seriously deserves so much better... post canon would've been the perfect place to revive her friendship with both Dave and Karkat. but also, her and Vriska's relationship got totally shafted in post canon. for self proclaimed Vriska fans, they don't really seem to be including her? like they basically just replaced her with a bland teen version? what the hell was the point of that? to go off a bit: the most interesting parts of Vriska's story are centered around her traumatic upbringing, which she deals with in ways that make her difficult to love, and Terezi is tied to her through repeated attempts to love her anyway, in spite of how hard it can be.

the trolls actually have a lot of relationships where one person has to decide when to stick by someone, and when to give up. Sollux ends up in a kind of limbo state with Aradia... he still likes who she was, but she's not that anymore when we first meet her as a ghost. Kanaya is interested in Vriska for a bit, but eventually feels unappreciated and used after spending probably longer than she should've trying to become interesting to her. Feferi has to figure out how to give up on Eridan without it resulting in widespread destruction, and that threat is why their relationship is exhausting to her in the first place. and Terezi has probably the most complex conundrum of all with Vriska. the two of them grew up together, and spent a long time killing a lot of their peers. for Vriska, it was essential to her survival and she had no choice, while for Terezi, it was just a recreational activity... and this is why Terezi eventually feels more guilt over it, and is able to realize that she should try to reform herself. meanwhile, Vriska built so much of her identity and self worth around taking pride in her ruthless persona, that it seems inextricable from who she is.

Vriska can't give up her kill-or-be-killed ways, even when she doesn't need to appease her lusus anymore, because this is the metric by which she judges people, and she can't stand to see herself as a victim. to her, weakness makes you killable... the way her lusus threatened her taught her that. failure results in death. and that's what bothers her so much about Tavros. by the standards she grew up under, he shouldn't have even made it as far as he did. but he also didn't even grow up by the same standards as Vriska to begin with. his lusus is tiny and cute, and he's clearly never even been asked to do anything violent before. even the fact that he had a choice is a novel concept. he didn't earn the right to live... not the way Vriska had to. to her, that's not fair. he even wanders into a game called "fatal live action roleplaying" like... the word "fatal" is in the name, looking for a fun adventure. as if Vriska hadn't been using this game to hunt her peers all this time. and she's probably killed a ton of more capable trolls than Tavros. what gives him a pass compared to them? the basic existence of someone like Tavros is like a wound that Vriska can't stop picking at, even while she's too prideful to admit she would've wanted a better life than what she got. instead, she has to hold others to this ruthless standard. if she doesn't, she might have to admit that her struggle was optional, or that it might not have made any sense to demand that much murder from a child. she didn't have to be raised like that. but like hell she's gonna play the victim. and it's alienating to be hated because of the one thing you feel like you've really accomplished. nobody could ever stomach being proud of Vriska, so she does it herself. she only has herself to rely on anyway.

all of this signifies a person who is damaged. she's in survival mode all the time, and it prevents her from forming connections with people. and Terezi sees this. Vriska's connection to Tavros is unhealthy, not just because Tavros is being bullied, but because Vriska isn't moving on. she's still all wrapped up in the idealized superiority of power, and won't admit that she even needs anyone or anything, even though she's genuinely not okay with losing so many of her friends over the Scourge/Charge debacle. so many of them consider this a step too far, but Vriska has genuine trouble discerning what the difference is between this, and her whole lifetime's worth of behavior. this is what she's had to do, and they're all more horrified at her, than they are at the things that made it necessary for her to turn out this way. and they don't have any solutions either. none of her friends can say "oh, well you should've handled it this way. then we could accept you" because the morally responsible thing to do would've been to die. Vriska not existing could've technically saved a lot of lives... if Vriska isn't proud of her strength, she might have to actually start feeling guilty for what she's done. and if Vriska felt a level of guilt that others think is appropriate for what she's done, she'd basically be ruined. people consider her unsalvageable, and she knows they see her that way. it breeds mistrust, and leads to her making all her decisions on her own, without asking anyone's advice or permission. they won't forgive her for even being alive, so screw them anyway. it drives a deeper wedge.

and Terezi is the one who actually understands all of this. she gets it... she was there. but she also knows that it would be healthier for Vriska to admit that she doesn't have to, or want to, live that way anymore. pride be damned, the things they did were awful, and their behavior should change. Terezi always had less riding on her adherence to these standards, so she was able to discard them easier. and now that she's on the other side of it, she knows that the longer you spend acting like that, the more the shame stacks up in hindsight. Vriska is digging herself a hole, and it's painful to watch, because Vriska is still basically Terezi's best friend. it's a hard position... if Vriska is never held accountable for anything, and never suffers consequences, then she may never change. but Terezi also irrationally wants to forgive her. because Terezi also wants to forgive herself. she doesn't want to believe that either of them are irredeemable, but when she kills Vriska, it seems as though they both were. it feels like they were both ruined. from the very beginning, as kids growing up in a fucked up environment, they never stood a chance. it's why they needed each other.

I just really wish post canon could focus on these two healing. they're both so well written, and so complex and interesting... and I was even really liking the hints of John and Terezi picking on each other. let Terezi have low stakes contention with someone! shenanigans that don't result in death would be good for both her and Vriska tbh. and it'd be so funny cuz like, Vriska is fond of John, and Terezi is so peeved by him. I think Vriska really started healing by knowing John, cuz as a human, she has a blank slate with him, and he couldn't have been raised ruthless, even if he would've been adept at being that way. to Vriska, John is an alien and doesn't work on the same scale as her. it leaves the point of survivability pretty moot, so Vriska isn't viewing everything in terms of that with him. and it's nice. she has fun. she gets to feel like a kid in a way that she never got to, because everything really is so simple. what I wouldn't give for the three of them to be able to pal around on earth C, that'd be so interesting!

(I’m not gonna add anything bc this is just, so good)

[alliterative-albatross]

So, I sent you (@disgruntledspacedad) a pretty long ask a while ago (back when you had anon on) and I'm decently sure Tumblr ate it (or maybe you ignored it, in which case, feel free to ignore this one as well). But then I saw one of those "writers appreciate feedback no matter how long" posts, so I'm back here. Here is my mediocre attempt to rewrite my original review of your work. Bear in mind that English is not my first language, so if at any point my phrasing sounds weird to you, you know why. Mandatory disclaimer/apology: this might get a little too long 😅

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

I remember being SO mad at myself for not finding this sooner. I binge read it one afternoon with no thoughts for any real life responsibilities I might have had (and no regrets). Javiears is one hell of an unconventional relationship in the beginning, and I really love what you did with them. The whole premise of your story is quite refreshing, and you somehow manage to convey the trust and mutual respect there two feel for one another without explicitly showing us the beginning of their "entanglement".

Also, fuck you for what you did to poor Emilio, that man was a saint and he deserved better! I honestly can't believe that I got so attached to a character that appeared so little in the story, but it happened, and his death kind of broke my heart.

But the Javiears reunion + mild confession was lovely, and felt completely deserved. And of course the sex scene. I won't lie, I expected a bit better from Javi there, but I did like how utterly /human/ it was. Capturing that humanity, the imperfections in each character is something you're really good at (more on that later).

AFTERSHOCKS

Ah, my emotionally constipated babies who really need to work out their communication issues. I do love them, though. And this short series did a really good job of delving a bit deeper into Ears's and Javi's psyche. Kudos to you for dealing with the medical "aftershocks" of living through an explosion AND using that experience to move your emotional plot forward. These two need to grow a lot before they can get to a stable point in their relationship, and you really manage to convey their insecurity and fear of commitment/intimacy while making it clear that they're in it for the long run and that theirs is a relationship that WILL work out so help them God.

IF I FALL

Ouch. Punch me in the gut while you're at it, why don't you?

But seriously, "If I Fall" is SO FUCKING GOOD. Don't get me wrong, it's angstier than an image of Jesus on the cross (don't judge me, it's Holy Week and I just got home from accompanying my grandma to church), but it somehow works beautifully. You, my dear, play heartstrings like they're a fucking guitar and I AM HERE FOR IT.

You're doing an amazing job at making me feel everything these characters are feeling, which is both awful (bc pain) and impressive.

Also, if anything happens to Ana I will cry, because she is adorable and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Also also, if anything happens to Ears I will cry, because she is badass and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Also also also, if anything happens to Javi I will cry, because he is loving and wonderful and has suffered way too much already and really deserves a break and some cookies.

Basically, I am really invested in the well-being of these characters and can't wait until they're happy and safe again (please tell me they will be, my heart can't handle much more pain).

A quick note on the angst complaints: yes, this story is way angstier than most other fics out there and it can be a bit too much at times, especially considering how many chapters of pain it's been. BUT it's obvious that "If I Fall" NEEDS this amount of angst to get where it's going, to send the message it wants to and to properly develop its characters. The pain is as important to this story as flour is to bread. You may not like eating flour on its own (I don't think anyone does), but you love bread (because bread is amazing) and you must recognize that bread NEEDS flour to work. It wouldn't be bread otherwise. And eating the flour as part of the bread even makes you like the flour because the bread is just DELICIOUS.

I fully understand and sympathize with the people who have elected to table "If I Fall" until it's completed so they can binge read it knowing there's a happy ending in sight, but in case you're feeling a bit self conscious about all the angst, please know that your story is beautiful not in spite of the pain, but rather /because of it/.

PS: No, I'm not high/drunk, I just really like bread

AUTHOR'S NOTES

Silly thing to comment on, I know, but I do feel like it's important that you know how useful your ANs have been. There are many details in the story that I simply wouldn't fully get without reading your comments at the end of each chapter, and I appreciate your writing a hell of a lot more knowing how deeply you understand and care for each one of your characters. Plus, it is obvious how much work you've put into researching a country and a time period that are (from what I gather) unfamiliar to you, and I really do believe you've done an amazing job of it.

JAVIER PEÑA

My boy. I love your characterization of this complicated character, and I have eagerly read each and every one of your headcanons about him. I can't really say if your version is fully faithful to the source material because it's been a while since I saw Narcos, but your Javi most definitely reads like a real person. He's fairly consistent as a character, and I feel like everything he does is perfectly natural for him to do as a character. He makes for an unconventional yet deeply interesting romantic lead, and so far I have thoroughly enjoyed all his POV chapters/scenes.

OCs

I know you've gotten some flack for making her into an OC halfway into the story, and while I get why the sudden change may have felt like a disappointment for some, I don't share that sentiment. I firmly believe that this fandom is unfairly harsh towards Original Characters and their creators, and I don't really understand why. Listen, I love Reader fics, and consume many Reader fics. I have read dozens, maybe even hundreds, and I can safely say that I've only ever "inserted" myself in approximately 10% of those stories. Reader characters are not as blank as their writers may want them to be. They can't be. They're characters, and character have personalities and moral values and senses of humor and a bunch of other things. Reader characters may not have a backstory or a physical description attached (and even that's not guaranteed), but they're still characters.

And on a more personal note, pretending they're actual blank slates is naive at best and insensitive at worst. Reader characters are American coded 99% of the time, and white coded 95% of the time. Not every readers is white nor American, even if that's the predominant demographic on Tumblr. When I read a JavixReader fic about a woman who speaks exactly zero Spanish, I know she's not me. The story may be beautifully written and have an amazing plot and character development, but the Reader *isn't me*. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, and some of my favorite xReader stories feature a "reader" who couldn't be more different from me, but it's something that enemies of OC fics should take into account. Particularly if they are white and/or American. But I digress.

HANNAH AARONS

Your character is amazing. She's strong, smart, confident, independent and an all-around badass. She gets kidnapped while pregnant and still focuses on problem solving and survival. But she's also overly guarded and mistrustful, and really needs to work on her communication skills. There are times when I absolutely love her and even admire her, and other times when I want to whack her with a slipper. She's no Mary Sue, but remains interesting and likeable throughout the story. She feels wholly human and real, and that's no easy task. I like her, I am invested in her, and I can't wait to see what's next for her. She's a compelling and three dimensional protagonist in a complex story who never fails to draw me in. I love her. She's your baby, and you should be proud of her.

Also, quick question about personality types: I know you've typed Javi as ESFP and Ears as ENTP (100% agree on both, btw), but have you given any thought to their enneagram types? I personally have always seen Ears as being somewhere on the thinking triad, maybe a 7 or even a 6w7, but I'm not too sure about Javi. 9w8 maybe? He could also be a 6w5 🤔

PARTING THOUGHTS

Basically, I love your story, your characters and your writing in general. You are a fantastic storyteller and wordsmith. You get into the heads of incredibly different characters personality-wise (Ears, Javi, Berna...) and manage to capture all of their complexities and quirks every single time. And it doesn't feel like it's something innate for you either. To me, it seems that you have put a lot of work and effort into understanding each and every one of your characters, who they are, why they do what they do and what they want. And let me tell you, all that effort has been more than worth it. "Better Love" is a fanfic, but it wouldn't be out of place in a regular bookstore, if I'm honest. I don't know what you do for a living or if you've ever considered writing professionally, but you clearly have the skills and the drive to create some masterpieces.

You are amazing and your writing is a gift. Thank you for sharing it with us, and have a nice day! ~ 🍪

~

My friend, I apologize for hoarding your first ask. I’ve been sitting on it because I’m not gonna lie, I enjoy going back and rereading it. It gave me a lot of comfort when I was in a pretty dark place, both personally and in regards to my writing, and I was reluctant to send it out into the the abyss of Tumblr where I might never see it again. 

That’s not fair, though. You put just as much effort into sending me that review as I put into my writing, and I apologize for never responding to you.

Okay, anyway, so twice now, you’ve made me cry. In a good way, I promise! 

I absolutely love your bread/flour metaphor. It made perfect sense. I want the emotional release of Javi and Hannah’s reunion to be earned, and in order to do that, the angst has to come first (there are also a few plot “ingredients” that have yet to make their appearances). Thank you very much for understanding that, and for voicing it so eloquently.

I appreciate your comments on my research and characterization. You’re correct that I’ve put a lot of time and effort into crafting a universe. In a lot of ways, I’m doing my best to stay true to the source material (regarding culture and timelines in particular), and in others, I’m branching into my own territory. 

On that note, I’ve never once regretted fully embracing Hannah Aarons’ identity as an OC. She’s stayed consistent in my mind from the beginning, and it was a relief to finally share my vision of her with the audience. And for the record, I totally agree with you regarding “reader” characters. Every reader insert echoes the perspective of their author, no matter how vague the physical description. I can only imagine how grating that must be from the perspective of a non-white, non-american reader. Thank you so much for sharing your insight! I will certainly keep it in mind the next time I write a “reader insert” fic.

Okay, enneagrams! I am much less familiar with enneagram than I am MBTI, but I agree 110% that Javi is a 9 with a strong 8 wing. I waffled back and forth on Ears a little, but eventually landed on 8w7 for her. It came down to the eight’s deepest fear, which is being controlled. That’s Ears all over, and the fact that she and Javi share that eight willfulness means that they might butt heads a little, which also seems very appropriate for them. Big thanks to @remusstark for her insight into the eight frame of mind - our conversations helped solidify my decision on this. :)

Anyway, I’m just rambling now. The big take-away point that I want you to get is that I am so, so grateful to you, both for your insightful feedback and your dedication in making sure that I actually saw it. You are an absolute gem and a deep thinker, Cookie-Anon, and if you ever feel like sliding into my DM’s, I’d welcome the opportunity to get to know you better.

Mad love and soft hugs, 

~ Jay

[topconfessions]

Agree with you and the anon on the stans that develop actual romantic feels post! While I do mostly blame the companies (planting that seed in young peoples head) and idols (for doing that action) it's the stans within their own little bubble who keep the flame lit. There's nothing wrong about gushing over attractive people but it gets to the point for stans where they dive into that so hard and deep, they actually fall in love with a literal stranger, just bc they're pretty and stans encourage and participate in that behaviour. I see so many TikToks on how fans confess that they are so sad bc they have so much (romantic) love for an idol and they know it can't be reciprocated and they just stay in love and miserable. You're right, kpop has a certain spell on it, so the fans fall in love with the idol and mindlessly buy everything that they promote in hopes of a little smile or acknowledgment of the idol. They literally just sell a pretend boyfriend/girlfriend who entertains you all day, with no negative side to them. Kpop is such a cult and if you look at it with an outside perspective, it's creepy how much of those kpop fans have lost all sense of their identity, morals and values and just live through their fav kpop group and defend whatever the idol is doing, no matter how wrong they are (i.e. Burning Sun idols). And trying to break records that don't mean shit, while neglecting their own responsibilities (exams, work, school, sleeping even showering and eating). It's like they forget that they are a human being before a fan of anything. But the companies will still exploit mostly the innocent mind of those mostly young fans, as they do not know anything of this world yet, much less the entertainment industry. But I do believe there has to be an actual spell of some sort on some of those people bc there should be no GROWN grown adult, with a full developed brain, actually being in love with an idol and believing that gimmick.

exactly. luckily I was a broke bitch during my teen years when I was a hardcore kpop stan other wise I MAY have bought tons of bigbang merch just to end up hit with reality but even then, I always knew, somewhere deep down they were not worth investing in. I only purcahsed Jonghyun's album after he died and that's it.

this is why the average person makes kpop stans sound like psycho idiots and dumbasses for being a fan. I don't even tell people voluntairly I like it cause they see it as just bts and madness when kpop wasn't always like this for us og's who were fans before them.

I won't lie I was kinds somewhat in love with top...or maybe I was just fixed on him but I could always tell in real life we would never get along to that degree as lovers or best friends, just casual friends. If kpop fans can't be realistic like this they need to step back and detox. like I just lost a friend who was a fucking psychopath and perverted creep who is way younger than me yet like a child has know it all syndrome and always tried to correct me / force her own opinion me about how to go about things and life swearing she's so stable and shit but yet she spending all her disposable income on shoes, kpop merch and shit that is temporary. I didn't even have the heart to tell her Now is not the time to be blowing all your money on BTS merch and items when you are freshly moved away from home in your own place that'll catch up to you and one day you will wake up and may not feel the same about them..you are left with items that hold no value and wasted money.

michael jackson had this effect on people in the 80s and 90s but he didn't do spellwork he was just that damn good and talented, I give him a pass cause I can understand if someone back then said I am in love with MJ cause he gave as much back and he was given plus I saw many fancams of him abck in the day where he held convos with fans, took gifts from fans personally and gave hugs to them he wans't dismissive or restrained like beyonce. stalking him god forgive me for saying it, would be worth it cause he was a lonely sensitive persoon. These idols are in a bubble / watched at all times and they themselves are buying into the system. They won't be like him cause they are much too trained mentally and adept to see a big divide between themselves and the fan. You won't get a random hug from an idol at the most hand touching a fan event and that is you are lucky.

I wouldn't pour my energy into an idol like that unless I truly felt they were influential to my life or could give me back that same energy and none of them can. JREKML dude who did the kpop reactions that guy is pretty cool with bigbang in person cause he got many chances to get close to them but that requires freedom, money and time. Not a lot of us have the time for that* KPOP isn't like hollywood and california where you can go to a game and see your idols hanging there or bump into a star at a shop and say Hi or wave and get a picture. they are so out of reach which further fuels their value and mystique.

[heiterbroward]

#TangsIsAPlague

Um, so to start off, let's address the fact that Jeronica are being consistently portrayed as pathetic this season! V is pining after Bald meanwhile Jarhead is making up Bughead edits in his head. The question is...why? Like why still? Is stuff like that supposed to be a Bughead or Varchie crumb? Bc at this point, it would only count as such if it came from Barchie's pov. Why can't they just drop it and let Jeronica actually move on? Jughead ignores Tabby for weeks on end, and V is worried about who's endgame during the apocalypse. Like um, ladies...snap out of it!

Kinda just seems mean-spirited at this point, too. Like Roberto Sasquatch is bitter bc they had to do 4 seasons of BugVarchie since he was too much of a coward to go against fanservice for the Bughead stans. So now they have to rub it in every chance they get and make Jughead and Veronica (mostly Veronica) look like fools. I mean, look at her performance in this ep...girl! Can't even defend that, sweets. Most cringe since her rendition of "Carry the Torch" when she didn't know who it was about. And she's gonna go on about "I'm a glorified party planner and have no social life...but I'm fighting for my friends!" Like how do those things go together, V? It's true, everyone only goes to you when they need something. Someone please get this girl some actual friends. She's having a nervous breakdown! Here's to the ladies who lunch! Please have mercy on my girl during these difficult times.

And it's all to overcompensate for their bad writing and lack of build up for Barchie in the first place. Their s5 plot made no sense. Archie chose Veronica in the Next to Normal ep and even wanted to be just casual w her before he even considered Betty, just like how he chose a chance to pursue a married Veronica who may not even be interested over pursuing something serious w Betty. Do I think this should have even happened? Not really. Varchie never should have even been a thing after the time jump, and they should have just started w Barchie and given Archie's "love triangle w Chad" plot to Reggie. But Varchie is what they chose to write, so...they can't just act like things didn't happen how they did. And this is from someone that genuinely did and wants to like Barchie as a couple, but the story they're giving them is only good if you make it up in your head - if you just ship the IDEA of Barchie instead of paying attention to what they actually say and do on screen. It's obvious that Betty is and always has been in love w the Scarlet Beast, but when will he show anything toward her that is strictly romantic and can't be interpreted as just a deep love and friendship bond? They are best friends and there is a sexual element, but where is the romantic element? He's never been afraid to wear his heart on his sleeve in the past. I disagree that Betty is the one holding back. Archie didn't dump Veronica specifically for Betty (which would have been more meaningful). He was just certain that he wanted to stay in Riverdale since he gave up on his individual desires and wants to exist as the thematic embodiment of Fred. But is he certain that Betty is the one he wants to build a life with? If so, I would like him to demonstrate that instead of it just seeming like he decided to give it a go bc they both decided to stay in Riverdeuce.

Another thing is why do they have to act so high and mighty about killing Percival? Hiram only stopped after he was dead. Nothing but death can stop these types of all-powerful, relentless villains. Plus, not everyone has the privilege to be so morally perfect, valuing principles over people. Archie is lucky that Grenade Heather knows Sabrina or else his reluctance to kill would have just resulted in the deaths of half the townspeople. Is it not worth getting a little blood on your hands to save the people and town you care about? I'm sure the show will find a loophole where they won't have to kill him and can win anyway, but still! Meanwhile, Betty just killed someone last episode. I hope his morals aren't too black and white for someone like her bc I don't want her to be on pins and needles, worried about fucking up bc Archie will change his view of her if she does. And if he doesn't, then he's a crypohit!

Anyways, like Toni finna be rude as hell to V all last season then come ask her to plan a last-minute wedding? Da fuq? And ask Cheryl to officiate? She was highkey a jerk this ep! Omg and Fangs' vows? It was like half a sentence, girl, and u had to write it down? Does anyone even like Fangs anymore? I feel like ya'll just liked him bc of Sweet Pea and when ppl pretended to care about Kangs. Told yinz he should've stayed dead in s2 that one time!

P. S. I think everyone died at the reception bc they all thought back to V's performance and just couldn't take it. Also, why were everyone's outfits so ugly this ep? Js.

[loverspidey]

“Y/N, I need your expertise.”

the way i read the summary and i was like hush child no you don't

Peter announced as you both entered his room, and he then hurriedly closed his bedroom door to shut out the various chatter among your friends in the living room. In joining the academic team, your inner circle had expanded, adding most if not all of your teammates. This new group of students expanded your little, closed-off, quiet group of three into a perfect five. Less quiet and much bigger than before.

i'm sorry but i just think that's?? so?? cute?? like i love small groups too but it just makes me so happy,, especially bc i'm rooting for a flash/peter friendship

He glanced down as he fiddled with the strings of his hoodie, then slowly moving his eyes to meet your own. “There is this girl…”

me, reading the first part: AGHHHHH HES SO CUTE WITH HIS HOODIE I LOVE HIM

me, reading the last sentence:

“She’s everything I’ve ever wanted...and more.”

sir unless it's me i do not want to talk about it

You wouldn’t say it out loud, but his words crushed you internally. It was as if this obsession over another girl took your heart and smashed it into a million fucking pieces, leaving you to figure out how to put it back together.

BDISODOEK BYE NO BC THIS HAPPENED TO ME ONCE (expect he actually didn't like me) AND THE FEELING OF SOMEONE CONFESSING THEIR FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE ELSE WHILE YOU LIKE THIS THEM SUCKS BUT THIS WAS WRITTEN SO PERFECTLY

As selfish as it may sound, you wanted to be the one that made his heart skip beats at a time. You wanted to cause him to make incoherent sounds instead of comprehensible phrases when he spoke. You wanted to be everything to him and more not…her.

no ms girl, it's not selfish bc same .... stupid peter parker and his stupid perfect self 🙄

“I need help asking her out, and I figured since you were a girl, you might have some expertise in this department,” Peter explained, focusing on your expression.

that felt like that one moment on harry potter and the goblet of fire like, i feel like hermione rn

“She’s beautiful, breathtaking even. The type of beauty that makes anyone's head turn for a second glance. I’d be shocked if she even liked me back. I’m way out of her league.”

someone play happier by olivia rodrigo, my heart can't take it anymore

You sighed, moving your hand gently back in your lap. “If this girl is just as amazing as you described her to be, the best thing is to be yourself. She seems perfect for you so I would go for it. Don’t doubt yourself, Peter.”

just have to appreciate the part where, in friends to lovers fics, they say like if she doesn't like you, she's not worth your time LIKE SO TRUE BFF THATS SO ICONIC also so adorable like i'm in love w this entirely

“Bullshit,” she stated. MJ placed her hands on both of your shoulders, ducking her head to meet your gaze. “Let’s talk in the hall, ok?”

MY WOMANNNNNNNNNN UGH I LOVE HER SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

“I’m not jealous, MJ,” you huffed, sniffling as you wiped falling tears. “Peter asked for my help to ask out some girl, and I told him exactly what to do. When I asked for her name, he refused to tell me who she was.”

except i am, i won't lie to myself 🤧🤲

“Are you free this Saturday? Cause this girl I know told me I should probably take you to a movie? But I wasn’t sure if you would like that.”

HXISKXJSKZKQKXJSIWODKW ME RN:

“Peter Benjamin Parker! Are you shitting me?” You beamed, unfolding your arms as you wiped the tears falling from your face. “Hell yes, I’ll go to the movies with you!”

i can see myself saying this word. for. word. but AGH OK I ALSO LOVE HOW SHES SO EXCITED ABT IT SHE DOESNT EVEN TRY TO PLAY IT COOL BC SHE'S LOVED HIM FOR SO LONG

The rush of both happiness and sadness washed over you and your emotions and caused you to press a gentle kiss on Peter’s lips. Your hands ran along the back of his neck and seeped your fingers through his brown curls. Peter pressed his hands and lips deeper on your skin in response to your touch. His mouth opened to deepen the kiss, but you quickly pulled away, knowing you two would be here for a while if he kept kissing you like that.

peter parker should change his name to loml. just saying. also YRUQBSHIOSJWNW I THOUGHT THAT WAS INCREDIBLE I LOVE THE WAY YHIS PARAGRAPH IS WRITTEN ITS SO WONDERFUL

green isn't your color - peter parker

paring: peter parker x reader

summary: trying to impress the perfect girl can be hard, especially for peter. in need of some help, he asks you, and you get a little jealous.

word count: 1.9k

warnings: swearing and some angst in the beginning.

requested: no, but feel free too if requests are open

->masterlist ->requests

“Y/N, I need your expertise.”

Peter announced as you both entered his room, and he then hurriedly closed his bedroom door to shut out the various chatter among your friends in the living room. In joining the academic team, your inner circle had expanded, adding most if not all of your teammates. This new group of students expanded your little, closed-off, quiet group of three into a perfect five. Less quiet and much bigger than before.

Now, you all were scattered across different rooms and taking a quick break before getting back to work. Peter had rushed to grab you before you could even get the chance to run off and talk to Betty and MJ.

Peter settled in the open spot next to you on his bed. “What for?”

He glanced down as he fiddled with the strings of his hoodie, then slowly moving his eyes to meet your own. “There is this girl…”

"…Girl?” You interrupted. “As in a girl that you like as something more than a friend?”

Peter moved his lips without managing to get out any sound, making you squint as your lips pursed.

“You must really like this girl then if she’s got you all choked up like this.”

“She’s everything I’ve ever wanted...and more.”

You wouldn’t say it out loud, but his words crushed you internally. It was as if this obsession over another girl took your heart and smashed it into a million fucking pieces, leaving you to figure out how to put it back together.

Your hopeful mind and heart prayed the girl he’s always wanted was you. As selfish as it may sound, you wanted to be the one that made his heart skip beats at a time. You wanted to cause him to make incoherent sounds instead of comprehensible phrases when he spoke. You wanted to be everything to him and more not…her.

Ever since freshman year, it was you, Ned, and Peter. Then, after a year of chaos with Peter becoming a superhero and all, not to mention saving the entire academic decathlon team from death in D.C., it became you, Peter, Ned, and MJ. Or better yet, what you thought was an unspoken thing between Peter and you, and MJ and Ned rooting for you both as a couple on the sidelines.

The secrecy did cause a divide between you and Peter’s relationship until he finally confessed to being Spiderman. From that point forward, it was no more lies, no more secrets, no more hiding, and you both began to grow closer because of it.

A rather large amount of jealousy seeped through your veins, but you hid it well. You would do anything you could to help your best friend, even if it meant making him and some other girl you knew nothing about happy.

“What exactly do you need help with, Peter?” You asked, plastering on a smile as you inquired for more details.

“I need help asking her out, and I figured since you were a girl, you might have some expertise in this department,” Peter explained, focusing on your expression.

You turned your head the slightest bit to stare blankly at the bare wall with a handful of different things pinned to it. Huffing lightly, you knew it was best to help him, so you quickly pulled yourself together before turning back to Peter. “What is she like?”

“She’s beautiful, breathtaking even. The type of beauty that makes anyone's head turn for a second glance. I’d be shocked if she even liked me back. I’m way out of her league.”

“No, Peter,” you cut in, placing a reassuring hand on his. “If she doesn’t like you back, she’s crazy. Any girl would be lucky to have you.”

Your words encouraged him. Peter’s cheeks reddened as he smiled before continuing, “And we share a lot of interests.” he added, his eyes lit up as he spoke his next words. “We both like a lot of the same movies. Except for Star Wars, though, she thinks I watch those movies way too much.”

“Her and I both.” You interrupted, laughing at his last statement.

Peter’s eyes finally met yours, his pupils dilating as he looked to you, “I want to impress her, but I have no idea what to do.”

You sighed, moving your hand gently back in your lap. “If this girl is just as amazing as you described her to be, the best thing is to be yourself. She seems perfect for you so I would go for it. Don’t doubt yourself, Peter.”

“You said you both love movies, so asking her to see one could be a good idea.” You suggested.

Maybe she was even better for him than you thought. Maybe even more than you were.

“I should have asked this first, but what’s her name?”

Peter looked at you wide-eyed, his eyes moving quickly from over your shoulder to back at your face, “Her name?”

“Yes, Peter, she has a name, correct?” You asked, furrowing your brows at such an easy question.

He scoffed at your inquisition, waving a hand out as he shook his head profusely, “You wouldn’t know her. She doesn’t even go to Midtown.”

“Oh,” You stated, raising your brows as your lower lip moved downward. “Now, I want to know.”

He lowered his eyebrows as he pursed his lips shut. “I want to tell you, Y/N, truly. But I need more time-.”

“Really?” You asked, glancing blankly at Peter in his attempt to hide the girls' true identity. “Time for what, Peter?”

“You know I thought we were over this whole lying thing after everything that happened last year, but I guess I was wrong.” You raged, standing from your seated position, and Peter soon did the same.

“Y/N, It’s not at all like that, I promise.” Peter insisted, widening his eyes as he swallowed the fear rising in his dry throat.

“Why can’t you just tell me her name?” You angered him as he stood there saying nothing. “Does she not like me or something?”

“It’s not that, I-”

You moved further away from him, too angry to even be in his presence. “Well, what is it then?”

Peter’s end was dead silent. Wordlessly, he stood there, trying to figure out what to say next. “You know what? I’m out of here. Good luck with your ‘girl’ if she's even real. I’m going home.”

“Y/N, let me explain,” he began, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder.

Angrily, you shrugged his hand from your body. Your eyes were bulging, practically about to fall from your head. “What else is there to say except you needed girl advice, but you couldn’t be so courteous as to tell me the name of this girl you can't shut up about!”

“Y/N, Wait!-”

You angrily spoke your words while heading for his bedroom door, then slamming it shut. Oblivious to the people scattered across his living room, four curious heads all turned to the source of such a loud noise. Embarrassed, you rushed to your school backpack, feeling the tingly feeling of heat rise in your cheeks.

“Woah, what did Penis Parker do this time?” Flash asked before Ned would then slap him lightly on his shoulder as you moved past the array of stares you were receiving.

“Hey, you good?” MJ inquired, stopping you before you could head out of Peter’s front door. You wouldn't even do so much as to meet her gaze.

Tears began to stream down your cheeks, making you want to die more of pure embarrassment, “Yeah, I’m ok. I need to get out of here.”

“Bullshit,” she stated. MJ placed her hands on both of your shoulders, ducking her head to meet your gaze. “Let’s talk in the hall, ok?”

You proceeded to nod through your tears, then following her into the quiet hallway.

“What’s going on with you and Parker?” MJ asked as she shut the door. “And don’t try and play dumb. One moment you are both all googly-eyed over one another, and the next, it is screaming and door-slamming.”

She pretended to gag at you and Peter’s unspoken romance, in which you gave a small grin through your tears. “Peter and I may have gotten into an argument.”

“About?”

“...About him wanting to ask out another girl.”

MJ’s eyebrows raised as she continued to speak, “So you’re jealous?”

“I’m not jealous, MJ,” you huffed, sniffling as you wiped falling tears. “Peter asked for my help to ask out some girl, and I told him exactly what to do. When I asked for her name, he refused to tell me who she was.”

She curved her lips into a thin-lipped smile. “So, as I said, you’re jealous.”

“But, he didn’t have to hide her from me, MJ,” you whined, throwing your hands up in frustration as you spoke.

“Even if I was jealous, which I am not,” you insisted, emphasizing the last half of your sentence. “I thought we were best friends. The type of best friends who could tell each other anything.”

Her lips pursed, narrowing her eyelids as something seemed to be running through her mind. “I think you should give him some time.”

“What? You're taking his side-”

Creaks from behind made you turn as the front door opened and gently closed shut, thus causing you to cut off mid-sentence and swiftly face the opposite of MJ. Just a few inches from you stood Peter, his expression softening when he saw your teary face.

“Maybe you two should talk,” she told you, before pointing to the open door, “I'll be inside if you need me.”

“What do you want now?” You sniffled, looking down as you crossed your arms across your chest.

“Y/N, I didn’t tell you her name because-”

“Because what, Peter?” You yelled, widening your eyes as tears only streamed down your face even faster. “Because you don’t trust me?

You huffed before lowering your tone for the next words you spoke. “I didn’t tell anyone that your Spiderman, Peter. I would never do that to you.”

“I know, Y/N.” He breathed, inching closer to your teary face. “It’s just- I-”

“You what?”

“Are you free this Saturday? Cause this girl I know told me I should probably take you to a movie? But I wasn’t sure if you would like that.”

“Peter Benjamin Parker! Are you shitting me?” You beamed, unfolding your arms as you wiped the tears falling from your face. “Hell yes, I’ll go to the movies with you!”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, which then made Peter set his hands on the lower curve of your back. “I didn’t tell you because I wanted to make it special, and I didn’t mean to make you upset.” Peter started as a smile grew bigger and bigger on your once crying face.

The rush of both happiness and sadness washed over you and your emotions and caused you to press a gentle kiss on Peter’s lips. Your hands ran along the back of his neck and seeped your fingers through his brown curls. Peter pressed his hands and lips deeper on your skin in response to your touch. His mouth opened to deepen the kiss, but you quickly pulled away, knowing you two would be here for a while if he kept kissing you like that.

“Wait,” You began, pulling your hands down to a new resting place on his chest. “Why didn’t you just ask Ned for help?”

“Well, he suggested I go straight to the source, and I did. That source is you.”

“You need to stop asking Ned for advice. Immediately.”

[3one3]

Okay Sunday update tyme. 

There may or may not have been a mini war over making my coffee this morning. I'm not really sure. All I know is the one I got was made by the Babysitter and not very good. 

Then there was a baby. This nice couple that comes in often arrived with their maybe 16 mo son, who the Babysitter always holds and stuff. He lets him play with the touch-screen. Some people just really love babies. They see a baby and they get heart eyes and are like oo a baby how ~cute~ lemme go see it! I’m not one of them. I’m mostly afraid of and/or grossed out by babies. The Pacifier definitely got the baby gene. He was DELIGHTED by the baby. Instant, yuge smile. He went over to see him, and tickled his tummy and stuff, and I was like wow, he’s more interested in touching a baby than me, that hurts. Way to cut me deep. It was still really cute to see him be delighted by the baby tho. I def got THAT gene. The “guys being cute with kids directly affects ovaries” gene. 

Then the piña colada party started. They're not on the menu. I guess someone bought a big bottle of Cooco Real, the coconut cream stuff that makes piña coladas delicious at 900 calories per sip, but not really because it’s not as good as the thick stuff that comes in a can. They also don't have anything else blended on the menu but they do have a blender. Out comes this blender. The Pacifier and the Brother are practically giddy about this, and are verifying with the Babysitter what to put in it. He takes over anyway. Pacifier suggests using Malibu coconut rum and Babysitter is like no you use the regular clear rum rawr. They're actually both wrong. You should use a good quality white rum, yeah, but you should also use a really good dark rum. But that's if you have good quality coconut cream, which they didn't. It should have coconut milk too, and some lime, but I didn’t want to lecture the bartenders on how to bartend, ya know? Just cause I’ve been a piña colada enthusiast since age 6 doesn’t mean I’m an authority.  

Babysitter makes the first batch and tries to pour some in this little coupe glass which is all wrong for that. How do you put a full size straw in a coupe glass? You don't. Anyway. It also won't pour. It's too solid. Like sorbet. I was like "it's supposed to be a liquid, not a dessert". Pacifier chuckles at this and I'm like oooo score. Pacifier goes and gets a cherry for it and everything and they taste some and give it to me to taste, and they both said it's not sweet enough, and I said IT NEEDS MALIBU, and the Pacifier is like IT NEEDS MALIBU, and it becomes clear at this point that the Babysitter has never had Malibu and doesn't know its awesomeness. Side note: my favorite whatever drink is Malibu and pineapple juice. I didn't even know they had Malibu at this bar until last week because no one uses it for anything but the Pacifier and I happened to see him grab it from below the bar and pour some. I always wondered why there is none on the shelf with everything else. Anyway. Moving on. 

A second batch is made, with Malibu, and offered around to everyone to try. It's much better. Babysitter still can't pour it tho and Pacifier and I are watching him try and I look at him and shake my head and he starts cracking up and I melt inside. Making someone you want to be friends with laugh with you like a normal reason rather than awkwardly laugh for no apparent reason every time you talk to him is just the best. They decide it can go on the menu for the day. I told the Babysitter not to serve it in that stupid glass but he insisted. He said hey could use the cocktail straws. I was like wtf how can you sip an already too thick piña colada through a fucking cocktail straw??? And he just laughed. Another guy decided the solution was to just cut the regular straws in half 🤷🏼‍♀️

I still had the whole first example to drink myself, plus some of the new and improved one. I really don't drink anymore, so that was enough to count as liquid courage I guess. It brightened by whole day. I was in a good mood. I decided it was to be a day of progress on the communication front. But then naturally the place got crazy busy and the Pacifier was running around at Mach V doing his job. I seriously can’t bring myself to bother him when he’s busy.

I waited until things calmed down considerably and did my standard I'm-about-to-be-annoying-but-at-least-I'm-sweet-about-it way of saying his name (this has gotten males of all age and association to do things for me forever) as he was walking behind me, and he leaned in beside me and said "yes? ma'am" and I wanted to end myself right then and there. You can't ask a girl to hang out one weekend and then call her ma'am the next. It's bloody criminal. I decided it wasn't serious tho. He called the Babysitter sir earlier. I call my officemate ma'am all the time, non-seriously, like when she brings my trash can in from the hallway and I say thank you, ma’am. But anyway it ruined the whole plan it took me an hour to decide on. I was going to summon him and then be like "you know what I want *wink wink*" bc obvi I wanted a coffee and he would know that. Ma'am threw me off tho. And then he didn't give me a chance to ask a question anyway. He asked me if I wanted another one and I was like yesssss pleaaaaase. It was delicious and I was thankful. I wanted to tell him that he’s my favorite person on the planet on saturdays and sundays and that when I work those mornings the only reason I get out of bed is that I know I get to have that cappuccino after. He’s too quick. Or I’m too slow. Or something.

Now here's where shit gets cray. One of my clients and I have been looking at this horse for a while. We checked him out years ago when he had a different owner, and liked him but not for the price. Now his current owners put him up for private auction over the weekend and we were like, well if we can get him for X then it’s a no brainer and if we can get him for Y it would probably be worth it, but no more, and I did the homework on the other people I knew might be interested  and so I thought it was possible that we could get him for that. But we weren't fully sold on him. I usually feel strongly one way or another on whether to get a horse, particularly at a certain price point. I was like, we could do this, and it would be great, or we could not do it, and I probably won't  kick myself over it tomorrow. 

With 90 mins left on the sale clock, and an "it's up to you" order from the client, which I had been waiting for for most of the day, I decide that the best way to decide is to let the Pacifier choose 😂 I had a good reason though! The horse's name is one letter off being Cappuccino! It's a sign! I'll show him the video of the horse on my phone and ask him what I should do. It’s genius. I summon the Pacifier, who had to be wondering just how much cappuccino I can drink in one day, since that's all I ever summon him for. I immediately panic that the friend I was texting literally *about him* and practically nothing else and who hadn't answered me in over an hour would decide that was the right time to reply, and that she'd say something totally incriminating exactly as he was looking at my phone. It was too late to tell her to shh tho bc he was already incoming, and I couldn't do airplane mode bc I needed wifi to show him the Video. It went like this. 

"Are you superstitious?" (I'm thinking, what if he doesn't know what that means?)

~message from friend about how the babysitter is definitely cockblocking drops down from top of screen along with two others BECAUSE OF FUCKING COURSE and I desperately will her to stfu~

"No. " 

"Well I'm very superstitious and I need your help. There's this horse. See the video of  the nice horse?" I held the phone so he could barely see it, just in case. "I have an hour and a half to decide if I should get it for a client and I don't know what to do. I'm fine either way. I’m totally 50/50 on it. I could flip a coin. But the horse's name is Cappuccino (it would have been too hard to explain the one letter difference and I talk really fast when I'm nervous and it gets hard for people to understand and meh whatever) and you're my cappuccino guy so I need you to tell me what to do."

"Then you should go for it!" He says, laughing. It was sort of like a comfortable laugh too, not the awkward one. 

"You think so?"

"Yeah! Go for it!" At this point I'm just loving the carefree gung ho attitude here. 

I told him okay I'm gonna do it, and I warned him that I'm blaming him if the horse ends up being terrible. He was just smiley and laughing and stuff. 

And that's how i bought a $400,000 horse on the cappuccino guy's say so. Did I mention I forgot to mention to him how much the horse costs? 🙊 He might be one of those people who thinks even competition horses are peanuts. He probably has no idea. He might not have even understood what I was saying. He could have thought I was talking about betting on the horse or something. I have no idea. He was just all for it. 

I get really high when I do big deals. Like so pumped. I called the client and said to do it. And I was like shaking and grinning and stupid. Hopefully it was the horse and not just the interaction 🤦🏼‍♀️

I left a little while after that. On the way out when he was saying bye to me I reminded him that he's in big trouble if the horse is crap, and he was all smiles. 

I find out for sure tomorrow morning if our bid was definitely accepted, but I saw no others come in after so it prob was. Lawd help me if this doesn't work out well 🙈🙈🙈

Then I went running and got sunburn bc it was earlier than I wanted to go but I was too hyped to sit still, then I saw one of the guys from the restaurant on the way to where I run, and he was on a bike share bike outside mcdonalds in work clothes but not the ones he was in earlier and I was like wtf and also please don't notice me in my terrible running outfit. 

Then I got some really upsetting texts from bf about all this 😕

Then I had some food and prepped some stuff for my lunches and then I worked out bc the high hadn't gone away yet and ya gotta use it while it's there. Haven't managed to figure out how to use it to fix the bf thing tho. 

But, consider yourself updated.