#and it STILL never ever gets remotely boring or stale?!' factor | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lezliefaithwade · 4 years ago

Text

A Breath of Fresh Air

The summer after my first year of theatre school, I was sleeping on the living room floor of my cousin's apartment in Toronto, trying to figure out what to do with my life. My cousin had been an actor before he became a quadriplegic in a car accident, and as I unadvisedly bemoaned my unemployment status, he said something like, "Seriously? You're complaining about your life? Don't make me burst a colostomy bag." He was right, of course. I wasn't in a wheelchair, though I did have a stepmother who had rendered me homeless because of her dislike for me. She was always saying things like, "Your hair can't be as ugly as that hat you're wearing." Or simply refusing to invite me to things like Christmas dinner. I always admired people with families. My boyfriend at the time was one of five kids who were always doing things together. Their house was always full of noise and activities. Even as a shiksa, I felt more at home there than with my stepbrothers and sisters, who never lost an opportunity to point out that I was weird. I wanted to stand up to them, but not wanting to cause my father any grief, I held my tongue and sought refuge elsewhere. It occurred to me that perhaps I was using the theatre as an opportunity to say things through characters that I couldn't find the courage to express myself.

The Toronto Star was still open on the kitchen table, and I rummage through the Want Ads, that dirty part of the newspaper near the back where complete strangers will soon become complete assholes in your life by forcing you to work menial jobs in humiliating uniforms for minimum wage.

"Find anything?" my cousin called from the bedroom, where two attendants helped wash and dress him.

"Social services are advertising for camp councilors to work with emotionally challenged kids."

"Oh yeah," He said. "That might suit you."

I'm not sure I knew what he meant but, I was beginning to think I'd outgrown my welcome. My cousin probably would have encouraged me to join the circus if the option had been available. Knowing my living room days were numbered, I thought it best to make an effort and apply.

I had no experience teaching drama—no experience working with kids and no experience going to or working at a camp. Despite all that, I was hired. It's worth noting that it's probably not a good sign if you get a job with no qualifications whatsoever.

My official position was Drama Councillor, and I prided myself that with only a year and half of theatre training behind me, I was well equipped to help others benefit from the wealth of my experience. I imagined myself, Maria Von Trapp, teaching children how to sing while they looked at me adoringly. Somehow, I conveniently blocked out the rebellious early stages she experienced and skipped straight to the good parts. Also, I might add, forgetting about the Nazis and having to climb over a mountain. Still, visions of me biking around camp with a group of happy campers behind me filled me with a sense of self-satisfaction.

As I packed my knapsack with deet and a secret stash of Twinkies, I thought of how only three weeks earlier I'd been in New York walking through Central Park and savoring Cappuccinos at outdoor cafés on Columbus. Now, here I was, ready for something different. The wilderness, I imagined, would be a welcome change—fresh air and loons instead of smog and sirens. I thought smugly about my classmates sweating behind visors at take-out windows shoveling fries into cardboard cups or wrapping sandwiches in tinfoil. Thumbs up to adventure, I told myself. The fact that I'd never once in my life enjoyed the great outdoors didn't factor into my mind. All of this changed with each accumulated minute of the 391 Kilometer drive north.

It was late afternoon when I arrived at the compound. Overcast, sullen, it was a place so secluded you'd need flares to find it. It had that distinct aura of someplace time forgot. A place left behind and neglected. In the brochure, the sun was shining, flowers filled the meadow, and you could practically hear laughter floating off the page. What I was looking at bore more of a resemblance to a situation in a Stephen King novel where camp councilors discover a pack of hungry teenage zombies have lured them to a seemingly idyllic retreat. Situated right in the heart of black fly country, I spent most of my days swatting insects so big they seem Jurassic.

During our orientation, child care workers warned us that children with mental health needs tend to run away - a lot and to keep strict attendance records and all eyes on them at all times. "These kids are resourceful and clever," they cautioned. I couldn't imagine being so determined you'd risk your life by escaping through the woods that surrounded us, but then again, I'd never been around children who weren't allowed cutlery before either

I shared my cabin with three other women with who I had absolutely nothing in common. Delia, a humorless 27-year-old cooking instructor who answered every question with a monosyllabic grunt, Jennifer, a 26-year old tennis instructor with massive blond ringlets who talked so quickly she sounded like a record on high speed, and an older aboriginal woman named Sunny who made us all dream catchers and offered advice about how to heal ourselves on days when we'd feel spent. "Remember, these kids need us," she said while purifying our cabin with sage. As I glanced around my assigned bunk, taking in the spider webs and loose floorboards, I had that sinking feeling that comes when you know you've made a terrible mistake. Before long, I was eating copious amounts of peanut butter on stale bagels amid a never-ending supply of starch. I'm not sure who thought it was a good idea to feed children with challenges like anxiety, depression, hyperactivity, and eating disorders copious amounts of sugar and carbs. It certainly did nothing to help them or me.

On the first day of class, I sat everyone in a circle. "Welcome to drama class," I said with a smile. "Let's begin by sharing with everyone a little bit about ourselves. Anything at all you'd like us to know?" A hand went up.

"I'm Tracy, and I hate my stupid ass brother. He can go straight to hell."

"Okay," I said, "That's a start. Who's next?"

Another hand. "I'm Jonathan, and this place sucks so much I wish it would burn to the ground!"

"Fair enough. Anyone else?"

"I'm Jo. I'm schizophrenic. So sometimes I'm Rachel and Julia. You'll know the difference because Rachel has a British dialect, and Julia talks slang."

"O-kay." I glanced at the social workers who sat on the edge of the room and looked at me with an expression that basically said, "We can't wait to see what you do next."

"Let's write a play," I suggested. "Write anything you want. Once you're happy with the work, I'll shape it into a cohesive piece that we'll rehearse and then present at the end of the season talent showcase."

The kids liked this idea. The showcase was a big deal. It was an opportunity for them to blow off some steam and express themselves to friends and family in a creative way. My only stipulation was not to use profanity. As the weeks passed, I was impressed with how well they all threw themselves into this project—all except Eric, the oldest boy in my 12 to 15-year-olds. Eric often wandered around the rehearsal space, unfocused and sullen.

"Any ideas for your piece?" I ask, checking in to see if I could help.

"I'm thinking," he'd say and then pace.

With three weeks left in the summer, I took my well-deserved week off to decompress. My boyfriend came up from Toronto and drove me to his parent's house at Post and Bayview, where caterers were preparing the tennis courts for an outdoor party. I walked into his mother's living room, and she gasped. "What happened to you?"

I didn't blame her. I hadn't spent much time looking at a mirror the past four weeks, but one glance at the large one in their bathroom told the full story. My hair was ratty; I had scabs on my knees, bruises on my arms and legs, and I was sunburnt. I was wearing a vintage skirt and blouse that was probably more Value Village than vintage and a pair of worn, scuffed purple moccasins; in essence, I was wearing slippers on my feet.

"Please take her to the mall and at least buy her a pair of shoes," his mother said, handing me her credit card and then rushing off to make sure the stuffed alligator would float in the pool. That week I ate my way through rugelach, hamantaschen, brisket, and bagels while his family watched me with awe and disgust.

Back at camp, the smell of burning insect repellent greeted me along with the news that the sailing and tennis instructors were sacked for disorderly conduct. Never mind, I had renewed energy and a sense of purpose. There were costumes and props to make. Sound and lighting effects to create. And we needed to rehearse. It was only a tiny stage somewhere on a remote camp in Northern Ontario, but the excitement was palpable. I was excited. This would be the best talent show ever, and my kids were going to blow the socks off everyone there!!!

"Eric," I said, "How's your piece coming along?"

"I finished it," he mentioned casually

"That's great. Can I see it?"

"I want to surprise you. You're going to love it, though. I promise."

I patted myself on the back. Eric had a breakthrough. All my encouragement and patience had paid off. Perhaps I'd helped him have a developmental breakthrough.

"Can you tell me what it's about?" I asked.

"The Beatles."

"Great. Okay," and left it at that.

Talent Night arrived along with parents and family friends. The lights dimmed, the kids performed, and the audience enthusiastically applauded as each "Mighty Mite" or "Spirit of Paradise" breezed across the stage, acting out skits about fairies and monsters and assorted escapades. Finally, it was Eric's turn. Out he came, looking serious and theatrical. He cleared his throat and addressed the audience.

"This is called, The Beatles Last Recording Session. By, Me."

Three of his closest camp friends filed out and took a space on the stage. The audience was silent.

There was a dramatic pause, then the piece began.

"Fuck you, Ringo,"

"Fuck you, Paul."

"Fuck you, George."

"Well fuck you, John."

Then they bowed and left the stage.

Personally, I thought it was kind of brilliant. Needless to say, I wasn't showered with accolades about my teaching methods or the effect I had on kids. I left there having no catharsis about mental health except that giving people the opportunity to express themselves without censor is probably a lot healthier than insisting they stay quiet. I admired the honesty displayed in the kid's work. If only, I thought to myself, I could be half as brave. Wasn't that what I was spending time and money learning how to do?

A week after being home, I found myself packing, once more, for school in New York. Our term letters had arrived with instructions on where to buy character shoes, leotards, copies of The Children's Hour, and Death of a Salesman. The camp already felt like it was 391 kilometers away - soon to be 659. My father drove me to the train station with my stepmother beside him; she was there, no doubt, to ensure I boarded.

"You going to be okay?" my father asked, giving me a hug and slipping a $50 bill into my pocket.

"She'll be fine." Elsie chimed in. "You don't have to worry about her. Let's go."

But I wanted my father to worry about me. Not all the time and to the exclusion of all else, but certainly the appropriate fatherly amount.

As I settled myself on the train, I watched my stepmother pull from father from the platform to the car and thought of Eric's brilliant play. Under my breath, I whispered the immortal words of the Beatles, "Fuck you."

#stepmother #mental health #children #young people #summer camp

3 notes · View notes

blouisparadise · 7 years ago

Photo

As promised, here is the second part to our established relationship bottom Louis fic rec list. Part one can be found here. Happy reading!

1) Give and Take | Explicit | 1837 words

Sometimes Louis just needs.

2) Just A Trim | Explicit | 2260 words

“Harry. Darling. Can you explain to me what I’m looking at, before I rip your throat out through the phone?” “That would be me, holding a braid of hair in my hand.”

Or, the one where Harry gets a haircut, and Louis, along with the rest of the world, loses his mind.

3) Lips Are Like The Galaxy’s Edge | Explicit | 2360 words

Harry licks over Louis’ hole slowly, deliberately, and his tongue is like velvet and Louis’ skin is burning at every junction where Harry touches him and it’s all so good he thinks he might cry. He licks a few more times, moaning softly like he’s relishing the taste of Louis and that’s just, well, fuck.

4) Louder Louder | Explicit | 2931 words

There's really only one way to get Louis out of a mood this terrible, and Harry is prepared to sacrifice his entire evening if necessary.

5) He Steps Out, The Crowds Lose Their Minds For Him | Mature | 3022 words

The exact moment Harry feels his resolve break is when he pads into the bathroom one evening, yawning and scratching his arm to see Louis standing in front of the mirror, eyes downcast as he spreads one of his hands out on the slight bump of his tummy, rubbing over the jumper he’s wearing. Which, Harry is pretty sure, belongs to him.

It comes out accidentally. Accidentally, as in he didn't want it to come out yet, but it did. “I want a baby.”

6) Reckless | Explicit | 3028 words

Harry thinks it's criminal, the way Louis looks in his suit, sharp and expensive.

The feeling's mutual, judging by the way that (at his mother's wedding, no less) Louis leans in and says, "I bet you can fuck me without ruining that suit."

Harry does his best.

7) Handprints And Good Grips | Explicit | 3330 words

Harry wants to pull them down and suck him off. Harry wants to never take them off and eat him out over the lace. Harry wants to push them aside and fuck the imprint right into Louis’ body.

8) Painless With Immense Distance | Explicit | 3793 words

“You know when we talked about kinks and stuff awhile back and you said you wanted to try something?” Harry continues with a devious grin. Louis’s a bit lost and he tries to think about exactly what Harry is thinking about which honestly could be a handful of things.

“Prostate massage?” Harry asks like it’s as common as the sky is blue.

9) All In My Mind | Teen & Up | 4305 words

Louis and Harry find out they're expecting, and tell the boys. kind of.

10) With All My Surrendered Hearts | Mature | 4810 words

Louis beams, no, he fucking glows at that. He’s always been gone for this boy, ever since they met at ages fifteen and seventeen, back when they both worked at the Doncaster golf club, with grass-stained knees and evenings spent pushing each other into the ponds. It’s always been one of their quirks to add a bit of poetry. ("Because sometimes I feel like those three words aren't enough," Harry had explained.) Louis feels like he’s holding a flame inside of his ribcage.

Or, the one where they're long distance boyfriends, and Louis rides Harry while wearing his snapback.

11) Folded Up All Pretty (Fit Into You) | Explicit | 5655 words

“Missed me?” Harry laughs into his mouth, and it ought to be awkward with the way Louis’ tongue pushes at his teeth and the stretched out corners of his mouth, but really, it isn’t.

12) Heart Beats Slow (I Wish You) | Explicit | 6011 words

“These,” Louis pauses with a half-eaten toast in his hand and a stale bite of buttery bread still in his mouth, he feels like choking on it, “are girl’s pants. Why would I look good in girl’s pants? Do you not like my current choice in underwear or what?”

Or, the one where Louis loves panties and Harry loves Louis.

13) Want It All The Time, Need It Every Day | Explicit | 6306 words

Louis visits LA a week before the boys head to Australia for On The Road Again.

He and Harry have some catching up to do.

"This," says Louis, holding up a shirt from the box, "is the ugliest fucking shirt I've ever seen."

15) Casting Lines | Explicit | 7554 words | Sequel

Amidst the noise - the dog whining, Jamie's shrieking, Evie's giggles and bird noises, and Daniel asking loudly, again, about ice-skating - Louis leans in to press a kiss to Harry's smiling mouth. "Hi."

Harry doesn't loosen his grip on Evie's ankles where they hang over his shoulders, but he kisses Louis back and murmurs a quiet, "Hey, love."

16) Cease the Day | Explicit | 8195 words

In which 1D Day takes on a whole new meaning.

Instead of a seven hour livestream, the One Direction team deem it more profitable to offer an entire day spent with any one member of the band for the highest bidder. What happens when the same buyer wins both Louis and Harry for a day?

17) Forever, Uninterrupted | Explicit | 8578 words

Harry finds a mysterious picture in Louis' bag one night and drives himself crazy over it. It's definitely not what he thinks.

18) Spice Up Your Life | Explicit | 9501 words

After a conversation with his Uni friends, Harry worries that his relationship with Louis has lost it's spark.

19) Anything Goes | Explicit | 10275 words

Harry probably shouldn't be amused that Louis has a death grip on his hand and is dragging away from an event that, you know, they should be at. And he still probably shouldn't have that god awful smirk plastered to his face when Louis shoves him into the bathroom and steps in before locking the door.

20) You Are My Favorite Place | Explicit | 10347 words

It had gutted Harry when he saw the headlines splashed across the gossip rags, the ones proclaiming the house he planned to make their home in LA was a bachelor pad. With both of them doing more producing and writing, Harry knew that they would need a place here so they wouldn't have to travel so much. As soon as he'd seen it and how remote it was, he knew it would be perfect.

It was so much more than some stupid bachelor pad.

Shaking his head, Harry glanced over at Louis. He was smiling, the one that Harry loved the most. His eyes were crinkled and his mouth was stretched wide; he looked so pleased that Harry had to lean over and kiss his temple. “So what do you think?” he asked, pressing the words against Louis's cheekbone. He pulled away to usher him into the house and they dropped their bags in the expansive entryway.

Harry had changed a bit of the decorating since the last time Louis had been there, making it more like the house the two of them shared in London. This one was more open, with more windows and more space for them to be themselves. No interruptions, no looking over their shoulders, just the two of them to break in all the new furniture.

He couldn't wait.

21) Can’t Blame Gravity | Explicit | 11931 words

Note: This fic has mentions of BH.

They have a tradition on their birthdays.

22) We Should Get Jerseys | Mature | 12147 words

Harry is a hockey player, and Louis is his slightly melodramatic boyfriend.

23) Let’s Take the World By Storm | Explicit | 14656 words

Harry lifts his head off Louis' chest to look at Louis' face. "What's that supposed to mean?"

“I don’t know, but our sex life feels a bit boring, ‘sall,” Louis says, completely avoiding eye contact.

“Boring.” Harry says flatly. He doesn’t say anything more, and Louis looks up to see that Harry seems to be mulling it over.

“Yeah, boring," Louis says, and keeps talking before Harry can pipe up. “I mean, think about it. We’ve been dating since X Factor, and now things are starting to drag a bit. We don’t even have the time for handjobs anymore, much less actual sex.”

24) Dreams Can’t Take The Place Of Loving You | Explicit | 15496 words

In which Liam is the go-to ring guy, Niall's relentless, Zayn is family, and Harry and Louis are disgusting.

25) I Would Follow You (To the Moon and Back) | Explicit | 20355 words

Everyone has baggage, some people sleepwalk, some have obsessive exes, and others turn into anthropomorphic wolf-like monsters that destroy furniture and run rampant in the forest. Perfectly normal.

Or the one where Harry and Louis have been dating for six months, Harry is a werewolf, and it's a full moon. This time they're going to get it right.

26) All The Diamonds You Have Here | Not Rated | 21603 words

It hits Louis now, how fucking close to the precipice they’re standing. Or, an au feat. investment banking and children.

27) Love Like Wildfire | Explicit | 21744 words

Louis was an Omega and a Prefect. Harry was an Alpha and a little rascal. They were mates, drawn to each other since they first met in the Hogwarts Express. They worked well like that, or at least they tried, which only made their relationship way more interesting.

28) Sort Your Head And Facedown | Explicit | 26426 words

Harry gets sent to an alternate universe where most everything is the same and most everything has changed.

29) What This World Is About | Explicit | 34472 words

An eighties American high school AU; there are first times, football games, and feelings.

Alternatively titled: the beginning.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

#blp #blp fic recs #fic recs #bottom louis #top harry #established relationship

234 notes · View notes

throwingideasatthewall · 4 years ago

Text

Clone Wars Episode 10

Lair of Grievous

An interesting episode title

For sure

[Quote]

Most powerful is he who controls his own power

I really Like This Quote

Being a fan of ... accountability

Notably

“Vice Gunroy

Escapes,”

Ahhhhh

I mean?

The Episode Before Was (Marginally) Better ....

To It’s Pre de cessor

Why do I Get The Feeling This Is Gonna Be A Long Run..?

Any way

That’s Going

Only that one Guy

No... -Body Else

Uhm

Kit Fisto

What?!

Okay

Guess

His design Looks Neat

And No Ahsoka! (The Bad Parts.)

“Gun-”

“And Return Him Just-”

Ena bling! Where he’ll be put in a cell with other inmates that don’t deserve that

And a distraction from reckoning with the consequences of his actions

(And the hope of getting out)

“ I know we’re in the middle of nowhere,”

I like this guy

He sounds cool

Has a personality

(An over involved one?”

But generally good

This might help my nerves after last episode

Very chill

Nice

- Oh spoke too soon

So has your old Padawan Dolved

???

Seriously, does everyone keep track of everyone else’s Padawan

Obi-Wan, it made sense because he’s an over involved dick

But, seriously

Shouldn’t that be left To Yoda as the grand high Jedi?

He is the guy that okay’s these requests, right?

It’ll be great to see Nadar again

Dude, he’s busy

“ i’ll transmit the coordinates for the ren dez vous point,”

Hey they got Ahsoka right!

Maybe this episode won’t be a headache

(Also they just casually help him stalk his apprentice?

Like, that should be his choice

Like yeah two heads are better than one but that doesn’t mean he agrees to be a two- headed dragon

Dick move

And- It’s Gone (to be fair, it’s only slightly too much Tone Than Ne cess ary

“Yet,”

“Good hunting”

NO!

Well.... It’s Over,

Okay....

Nice backgrounds,

This is a really neat land

Oh, now they’re landing

Oh, cool

Fog -gy

Neat

Po -or Be -epy Ro -bot

He can’t see any -thing

“you’ll be fine R6,”

You have legs

Not pleas ed

Hav ing A Good Time

“Nadar,”

*Bows*

Dear frick who invited him here?

Like, Dude

Even if the Gen shares the same inspiration as you, you still have to obey by the rules of tox

Aka you don’t get to be a dick just because it’s a differ ent gen

You get kicked to the accoun -t- ability curve, just as well

Walk Ing into Some’s bus -i ness un warrant ed And un -ask- ed For Is Tox

And then, to follow it up, with hey you did well on the test we make you take!”

To prove we can’t assume authority over you

[Jedi master ship I believe]

I’m surprised dude doesn’t say ‘yeah your stupid club sucks,”

“ i’m sorry the war pre -vented me from seeing your train ing through to the end”]

wait dude’s Mentor bitched out and he still had to take the test?!

Murder is now on the table!*

Note; this is a joke

I never advocate death over account ability

But, geez Dude got screwed over

You were missed master

How old is he?

I’m going with adult-

Knight Ok he has enthusiasm

We’re all good!

Then let’s have a look

Allow me to show the way

Trans lation; Stop ass um ing

au tho rity

Good for him

Pretty pow.

Also yeah just casually found

“Charming,”

That’s a back -handed compliment

Like calling something “quaint”

Dude if you’re going to be on this Quest, Be Nice,

Look after the ships

Oh those poor guys

What happens to them?

[Also ships?]

Okay

So, Sith mon astery

No Guards

It’s a Sith mon as tery surrounded by fog

Clearly they were going for stealth

[And it Is pretty re mote]

The ent rance looks sealed

Yeah It’s Old

Possibly -came in the back entrance

And hoped no one wou ld suspect

[We specialize in ma king entrances]

Should n’t Dude (Jedi) Know That

Their, Jedi

Also yeah the place clearly built for stealth

Let’s bomb open the front door

Not like they could sneak out a back way

This will make less noise

Thank you common sense

But, It will still allow them a lot of time To Es cape

Like;

This why staking out is important

Patience the both of you

THE NERVE!

Dude he got here First!

You wanna help?

Be back up!

“ A second look usually pays off,”

On hand, yes- scouting ahead is good

On the other-

DICK way of put ting it

You want to explore?

Do it your self

You just assu med author ity over a wh- ole group of people

Stopping them from doing their thing

[I’m fully expec -ting him to snap at five

Like he’s being pretty enab- ling

But Dude’s being a prick

[pla -ying by the rule of “But,” Inst ead Of “Or,” Or “And,”

During their re latively func -tional mission

[dude never said he couldn’t blow up the mon astery

Just stated the fact and went about his biz

A nice factor

“What’s this,”

A stone

Bull -shit

Whelp

Smug Ass

You smell that?

Arro gance?

[let him get caught in a trap]

“ smells like droids,”

Metal Does -

It’s too dark to see anything

There’s white bulbs

Also [Forgot to mention], Chek Ov’s Gun?

[For the Gun]

Whelp

They Have Lights

[Also, Dark side shadowing]

Whelp

Hey at least there’s not as much point

Whelp

[I sense there’s something here]

Yeah?!

Was that not the whole point?

Whelp,

A rusted out old factory

Whelp

Poss- Ibly

Watch- Ing

“Ssh,”

You sure about that?

Whelp

“Well that was some thing,”

Jedi, you gonna do anything about that?

Whelp

Dude Taking point

Aga -in

Whelp

Ordering someone else’s troops

[I seriously hope that comes to bite him in the ass]

Roger Roger

Crud it’s the moon clones!

No, just droids up the stairs

Neat

They don’t see that?

Whelp

Vice Roy

What’s going on

They robots; they’re already designed to protect you

Also; BAIT!

The Jedi are here

Trap!

Also they’re walking side-by-side Nice

That’s totally someone else I call it

“ I know they’re near,”

Voice recording?

Whelp

They’re right behind you

What, where do something?

Def -initely a diff -erent per -son

Whelp

Taking longer than expect (ing)

“ Have you ever killed a Jedi?”

These guys have time for this

When fighting to fully trained adult Jedi

Those basic clankers

There the basic mooks that gets mowed down in the hundreds

Good Commentary

Bad timing

Oh now it speeds up

Good for them

They were loo -king pretty lame

Whelp

Stop playing with them!

Republic Dogs

Restraint

Shut the fuck up

It took hours

Because

“restr aint,”

Against

Mach inery

“ i’m sorry master,”

Don’t apologize

He’s being a prick

Like even by my stan- dards

[ignor- ing the war]

He turned a fun exercise again st machinery boring

By micro managing every one

-carried Away

This -dick

Those that have power should restrain themselves from using it

Against machines?

Dude....

I stick pretty closely to one moral code

And there was nothing even remotely reprehensible

About That Deal

Yeah, if they were sentient

But, they act just like normal robots Running on prot ocol Alone

Giv ing no hint to sen tience

Your complaint literally comes down

To chopping them into one or more pieces

That’s extremely overcontrolling and overbearing

Not to mention to reprimand someone....

Dick Move

That’s the point

Least it had dark ened lighting

“Lieuten ant,”

Called it

Also way to go dip shits

You left a com that can be traced back to your exact location

Whelp

Okay...

The tracking beacon

Yeah

They knew we were coming

And didn’t send a trap

Instead sene a thing that can be traced back to the location

Should’ve known Gunnery wasn’t here

No, you should’ve exercised caution

Well at least he isn’t blaming-

Screaming

Yes he would’ve

That was the first tip off

Also; clones?

I apologize for the deception

Bull shit

I apologize for my colleagues

-What?

Dude

Seriously

How easy are you trying to make it for them to find you?

Count Dooku

Why Dude?

Oh Wait enablers

Guess this is their tea sess

Okay hit us with that snark

....

Light Roast

He honestly seems so sad

What

This has got to be a trap

No shit

“Catch Some One,”

No not the vibe I got

Also there’s the clone

Wondered where he went

“To Catch,”

Whelp

Wow

What?!

Well

Looks like someone likes creepy statues

(I know there’s likely some deep lore)

Shrine

Dude this whole place looks like a monastery/castle?

You’re just figuring out This might be some ancient something or another

It’s on a foggy planet, Huge, Em-bedding And desolute

It basically screams basic cult

“Warrior,”

I was going with barbarian, but that works

Whelp

Weird

Juices

Nope Metal

Grievous Cult

This is the lair of General Grievous

Are you sure it’s not a cult?

Like I don’t know

But I wouldn’t keep Reminders of how I was brutally dismembered Around

IDK

Maybe I’m just not that extra

Whelp Dear Frick

Back to the thing

Also yeah don’t leave

Get Rein force ments

(I know I roast Plo about this all the time)

But A few more Jedi Might be useful Against a guy With multiple hands

(Or at least tell them Your Lo cation, What a quick summary)

So they know what they’re getting into if you disappear under “mysterious circumstances,”

Oh, plane

Oh, Grievous

Looks like he’s doing good for himself

Seems happy

Never mind

Guess where ignoring that thing

With The Comms

Stale mate

He honestly looks sad

You have lost your focus

I mean so far he hasn’t won shit

I’m honestly surprised he got it this far

Especially considering you’re the negative overinvolvement side

Sidious demands more dramatic results

“ can’t believe I came back to working here,”

More dead Jedi

Did he kill a bitch?

(I would say good for him but death< Acco untability-)

You expect victory over Jedi

Is battle Droids

It does require a brain

And a willingness to escalate

Oof

Seriously, Just leave

Whelp

These must be trophies

Jedi he’s murdered

Isn’t the str- the Ed- braid! Thing only for Padawan’s Like, you don’t seem to have one

So yeah Grievous probably killed a lot of children

There are so many

Maybe don’t send children to fight your battles

Why Would Dooku want to set a trap for his best general

Minion disposing Tea?

Also, why are you playing into it?

Like, fair enough, don’t turn down free Intel

But, you could set a trap and be doing other things

Like hunting down Vice Roy it doesn’t make sense

“Are we the bait or is grie -vous the -bait,”

Good question

Definitely grievous though

He was clearly offered up as a distraction From Vice Roy

We must consider who the trap is for

Grievous

You’re supposed to take him out

Your droid is track ing an in coming ship

Here we go

Match es the descrip tion

Keep out of sight

Whoa whoa hold up

Why are they calling and answering to you

These are Raden’s troopers

Dude has literally hijacked his whole life

Dude just kick him

Like fourth time but ,seriously;

Capturing him could turn the tide of the war

They’re literally handing him to you on a silver platter

Dude - needs a break

If he doesn’t know we’re here

Instantly down to do Dooku’s Dirty Work

“We need a plan,”

That’s what he just said

Whelp

That’s neat

Cool

Mood lighting works

Guards

Does he even know what happened?

Or did Sidious/Dooku set up this elaborate trap while he was out

And he’s just coming home like;

Why is the place so heckin trashed

Whelp

Dick

Dude didn’t sign up for this

Welcome home general

Half willing to give it to you

Whelp

*Oh*

Cough ing

Don’t let him cut the line

Whelp

Heck

He’s Trying

“ Don’t make me destroy you,”

If they try to foreshadow that ear lier

No Bad

Ter rible

Whelp

Seriously did they just reattach his legs??

Also, They really did not bring anything else to capture him with

Besides cables

To Grab

And nothing to tie him up with

How did they think this was going to go?

Argh

Just got slap stick ed

Haha

“Pack him up” ?

Whelp

Dude they are just knocked out

Whelp

Neat

Walking a little funny

Whelp

The clones get in the way

No you didn’t bring anything to restrain him with

“Taken him,”

Dude he just said “taken”

Not like he said “killed”

The most objectionable thing he said in that was blaming the clones for his failure

And clearly that isn’t your issue

Narrowing of the eyes was a good reaction

(Pretty sure the darkness is Him putting unwonton pressure and guilt tripping (Gas lighting)

He’s just too much of a coward to say anything because he can be held accountable At the fifth thing

Let’s tend to �� the wounded

Good job reflect ing mate

Whelp

Docter where are you?

Don’t be upset with me master

Geez

Dude does need a break

Even his own lair is toxic

Conversation

Rrgh

Look

Aww

Spare parts

Off

Body guards

Remotely deactivated for a re-charge

Oh so they weren’t killed

Gosh dude came back to A bunch of droids laying dead on the ground Like;

“These.. aren’t. mine,”

Dude is having a tough day

Argh

Not good

Good

Lock down the Perimeter

Good for him

Whelp

Looks, Better

Whelp

Watching

Yeah, those guys are dead from grievous

He wacked them with metal claws

Those guys don’t have a single piercing mark on them

Nor dented helmet

Not ready to take on grievous

No one is

Dude has robotic arms

It’s time we retreated

Make sure to bring something to restrain him next time

Whelp

Grievous isn’t doing anything

Good for him

“ You are not going anywhere,”

Well, he tried

He WAS just given An ultimatum from his boss

Gotta stop caring about those things

“ Guess we’ll have to fight after all,”

Or blow open the door

Or sizzle it open with your light sticks

Lots of options

Bring scout

Aight

Whelp those guys are dead

Also how did they even find them?

Okay, that one makes sense because he was parked literally 5 feet from the base

Fair Game

Get out of there R6

Good for him

Whelp

That one guy...

Whelp...

Yet

Good for him

You told him to leave

Dick

You surprise attack him

Call hypocrite, fair fight

Aaw, he’s nice

Fair

Whelp

Shit

Straight to the point

Doom Man -sion

Here we come

Whelp

Dude with the force can’t lift one guy

Well

General

Dude one trap and you’re ready to call it quits

Lame

We’ve seen the lower levels of your home

No you haven’t

You were on ground level

And you only just saw anything below that now

“ we’re not impressed,”

Dude speak for yourself

Also, fun

Good way to heal

“Good, Good, Jedi,”

This should be entertaining

- way to heal-

“You shall provide sport for me,”

Like; That

Whelp

Good time to entertain our guests

He’s a good host

Whelp

Dude has a dinosaur

And bots

Dude level spiked for a moment

Hmm

Nice

Oof

That sounds painful

Armor Patches

“Contrary to your belief I have other things to do,”

Good for him

He rans a med channel

“ go see to it my repair,”

Implaments (?)

*Impale Ments

There may be some discomfort

But I’m pretty sure he was already uncomfortable

Argh

No sedatives

Off

Weak link

Whelp

Surprised his pistol did anything

Like seriously even the swords would take a few whacks

There we go stabbing it with a sword

Your knight instinct

Whelp

And that clown just became the damsel

Whelp

Fail

Guess he’s dead

Or broke something

Splat noises are kind of humorous

So it could just be a broken nose

Great

Whelp

Instinct

Grievous is going to pay for this

Dude he made a humorous “Splat” sound

“Splat” is not a death sound

It is a broken nose sound

“Destroy him,”

I understand your pain

No, this is the time to take the kid away from the bad situation

(Or actually give him the don’t kill things talk)

That’s the better option

(Since he is still an adult and can make his decision)

“ but you forget your teachings Nadar,”

Not like that

That is how you get hit in the face

But in this war strength prevails

He literally does have a point

You two survived because of “superior genetics”

You’ve literally been hustling him since day one

And revenge is fine in terms of accountability

If someone stabs you, You’re allowed to stab him back

Abusers? Get their abuse back

Specifically in Murder

The dead isn’t alive to take revenge

And while he is right that accountability is better

That murder doesn’t equal murder

Because of the belief That all (human) Sentient life Inherently makes the world better By the possibility of them contributing good

Which is why I advocate accountability

The way dude is handling it is shitty

Firstly; all those present to the body are considered enablers, if they enable murder

And everyone who sees the body has to be on high alert

And accountability on sight

Because if you five rules A Murder -er...

Point being dude should. shut the fuck up and help him find this dude

The rules have changed

Yes, yes they have

“ perhaps you are the one that has changed,”

Shut up toxic

Dick

Enabling selfish dick

“ come now,”

He realized he fucked up

“ We need to move now,”

There’s no saving that

Whelp

Skipped past that

Looks better

“Gor,”

He named it

Where are they

Yeah wait what happened with the doors?

“Gor...”

Aww He sounds so sad

Argh

Oof

That pissed him off

Incoming message from Count Dooku

Oh, Good

The Jedi have infiltrated your Lair

Damn

He really didn’t tell the man about anything

Your recent defeats at their hands

Wow, Dude can Literally not get a break

You just called him five minutes ago

Fuck you

He looks so Tired

And Done

“Reassess your effectiveness,”

Oh that’s bound to piss him off

That you actively did that

I’m expecting a face Heel turn

“You”

There we go

“ you deactivated my Guards,”

Oh....

[I assumed he just forgot]

“ You let the Jedi in,”

No actually they found a magic brick

Unless Count Dooku just so happen to press the button at the same time

Which if so nice

Makes dude’s overconfidence even sweeter

“ so you would testing me,”

Dick

And he’s starting to look It

Oops

He’s pissed now

Like I know this is culminating in a fight scene

But I would just love if just walked downstairs. And was like yes I will go with you

Out of Spite

“ i’ll play your little game,”

In your condition you need your rest

I will rest when the Jedi are dead

Oh so that’s how they capture him

Maybe after he kills the young one

Sentry

Those robots do nothing

Whelp

Control Room

He’s Done

Oh, what do we have here?

Oh, this is what he does?

Master the Jedi are about to enter the control room

Snarky little shit

“Nadar, get inside,”

Yeah, No

Ahh

Nadar

Cutting out the abuser

Whelp

Absolutely can kick ass

Surprised no one who understands accountability

“Greetings young Jedi,”

Greetings Boomer

“How Ex citing,”

Neat

And Meta

Defeat us all

You’re one person but I accept the understanding

Get him Master

Oh he gets to see his apprentice die on the big screen

Wait, where is the other Jedi

Where-

Oh no

Self-awareness

Oww

But that wouldn’t kill a determined

Whelp he accepted death

“No,”

Yep, he’d rather die than live in the world you made

Enabler

(Technically; Both of you)

Welp I will kill you all

Do you hear me Jedi

Do you hear me

Fair game

Enablers kill enablers

No one wins

“ R6 is that you?”

How?!

Meet me at the south landing platform

I’m coming for you next Fisto

Whelp, i’ll be gone by the time you get here

Dick

Whelp

R6, I’m at the platform

Going somewhere

How?!

But also OK

Whelp

Hmm

Fan Technique should actually help in the fog

Whelp

Pawn In Dooku’s game

That power will only consume you

Like you

Flaunting it

Right now

Unless his battery gives out...

Whelp

Cheating

How quickly power can switch hands

Whelp Enabled

Expect ed

Accom plishment

So there’s room improvement

Oof

“His heart was in the right place,”

Not accountability

“ to answer power with power It’s not the Jedi way,”

HAHAHaHa

What’s the title of this again?

Star WARS The Clone WARS

It takes two to tango

Feckin hypocrites

In this WAR

HAHAha

“ A danger there Is,”

I feel bad for the voice actor that had to say that with a straight face

Nailed it perfectly well

“Oof losing who we are,”

Oh, that scene

Chills.

I REALLY liked this episode

It was funny self-aware and even had some good moments with the villains

Also

They killed a motherfucking dragon

*Named Gore

* excuse language

0 notes