#and i'm really tired bc i just got back from a long vacation and i'm on my period bc fuck me i guess

[lyracreek]

.

[starocean]

y’all i’m so sorry i’m hardly active on here, i really am.

i sound like a whiny baby but i’m so exhausted all the time, and mentally and physically i’m just not doing well. this has been feeding my depression and making it worse, which isn’t helping in the slightest. why do these always keep getting really long lmao

tl;dr i'm tired and all i do is sleep or lay around and rest and do nothing productive and it's taking a toll on me bc idk when i'm getting anymore extended time off and i just want to have time to properly rest and recuperate w/o worrying about work. and it's preventing me from doing anything productive

i'm a broken record but idc anymore man.

my vacation keeps getting pushed back, and i’m ngl, i’m still miffed my boss hasn’t even talked to me about it. i’m just. so tired. so physically tired that atp, if i let myself sleep without getting up to do anything that i need to do, i am getting around 12 hours of sleep or more. that’s literally half the day. i should not be sleeping that much of my time away, and it’s because my body is literally exhausted to the point that i’ve been getting headaches and fighting to stay awake while at work even when i am getting normal amounts of sleep.

i can't keep going on like this, and i really hope it changes soon bc it makes me want to cry. i hate feeling this way, feeling so sick and tired all the time. i just want my frickin extra time off, and the fact that my boss won't even talk to me about it just upsets me even more. the asm will literally pitch a fit if she can't get her vacation time or keep her off days. she does it all the time. when she starts trying to put her vacations in too close together and the sm rejects it, she will come to the store on her time off and demand to know why her time off requests were denied. she rarely has to cover for anyone if they call out, and when she does, she doesn't hesitate to let everyone know how pissy she is about it.

and not to go back to it, but that's a thing that really pisses me off about the sm trying to guilt trip me for wanting that one off-day back. i'm not like the asm. i don't gripe to all my coworkers about not having off this day or that day or whatever. i have not ever, actually, said anything to her about all the 9 - 13 day "weeks" she keeps scheduling me for (which will probably change, bc if i found out that the reason i have next weekend off is bc she's scheduling me for an extra long work "week" again, i will be saying something to her bc i'm fucking tired of it. i should not have to work two damn weeks for one day off). i have quite literally NEVER said anything about my off-days being taken without her contacting me before—even when that's been the reason i've had to work 13 days straight, but whatever—unless i had to remind her about certain times i'd already requested off bc of prior appointments (mostly for medical), and it's rare i have to say anything to her about that. i keep my displeasure to myself and bitch to my mom or on here, but i never say anything to my coworkers or my boss bc i don't like feeling like i'm being a nuisance.

but like??? that was the first double she'd had to pull in months. i've pulled more than they have, bc of someone calling out and the asm and other coworkers refusing to cover for anyone. and i still don't feel sorry for her covering that night bc she got the next day off. if i'd just let it stand and not said anything to her, it would've lead to another one of those 13-day work "weeks" for me and i wasn't having that lmfao. and, like, i am the only one that this happens to regularly. not even the girl who wants to work for days on end with no time off gets to do that. the sm has denied her requests of less time off because "you need to take time off, no one can work like that without a break here and there." which is true, yeah, but it's really fucking hypocritical bc?? she expects me to?????? she's scheduled me for these long ass "weeks" more than anyone in that store without even asking me if i'm okay with it, so????? fuck that.

it fucking sucks and it makes me wonder if i made the right decision about not taking a chance on that work-from-home job i found. i can't tell if i dodged a bullet by listening to the reviews, or if i screwed up a really good chance.

let me have my extended time off! damn!

[1d1195]

Burn out is wild because I have not been able to fully get out of it for years lol like i am just TIRED in all aspects! I think spring break is in two weeks i think but it's literally like three days mainly due to finals week lol i don't think I have anything too exciting for break other than seeing some friends? BUT yes i LOVE doing nothin on breaks/vacations! I truly enjoy my alone time and turning my brain off!!! Like the most I do is see my friends who come back home or just some that I haven't seen lol and when i was younger I we use to go on little local vacations like an amusement park or just go to another town because we were/are poor lol which is fine because i have no complaints! And You have no idea how much I've miss talking to you Sam😭 You even just remotely thinking about me, means so much😭 I saw a video where someone was trying to reinvent the "mash/bake potato" and my first thought was " I wonder how Sam might feel about this?" HAHA

The Time universe is a heavy/dark concept but that does not take away from how heartbreaking and heartwarming it is! You've always mention how writing and your stories mean a lot to you because of how person they can be and i think that you being able to create such wonderful stories is just amazing. It helps you and it helps others feel SEEN! I know I have felt so truly SEEN, which is rare for me, they way I can easily relate to your stories is wild bc not even in "traditional" media do i feel truly seen! and I know you answered an anon(i literally catch up on your blog first when i come on here lol) about how youre not really feeling to good about your stories :( I just want you to know that your feelings are so valid bc it's hard work and sense it is so personal at times, it's hard not to feel bad about it. You're also okay to feel jealous at your worst and that doesn't make you a bad person at all! but trust me you still have so many people who ADORE you and your stories! and not having too much smut isn't a bad thing! I know it' more popular but that doesn't mean it makes the story better! personally I have always been more of a plot person!

Also I don't want to overstep or anything but have you thought about asking advice from any of your writer mutuals/friends on here? Maybe they can give you input on which tags to use or maybe adding pics/themes to your posts? But I will never ask or suggest to change who YOU are as a person or writer bc in the end this is your blog and in the end you should feel good/proud of it and have the final say in everything! plus never feel bad for not posting constantly or taking breaks because your a real person Sam and you are allowed to take time for yourself. Youre allowed to take a step back because life so overwhelming at times! You can't do it all and that's okay because no one is really made to do it all if that makes sense? you need to give yourself the love you pour into others because nourishing yourself been if it's a little bit, it helps a lot in the long run❤️

Youre so loved Sam! I am so sorry you have been feeling this way :( If i could take it all away i would not question to do so! I hope that you get your deserved break and relaxation time soon! I love you so much, never doubt it!!!💜

(ps. saw someone mention Liar by Paramore as inspo for the physics couple?? HELLO?! this is wild bc as a stan this is so for me lol)

Wait omg I just realized how I forgot to mention in my long ass message that I read the zipper extra and it was so adorable!!! I loved it soooo much! They are just so cute together and ahhh I can’t believe they got married at the office 😭 it’s so cute bc it’s so them! And their vows omg 😭 loved it so much! You did great as always Sam!-💜

----------------------------------

I love you so so much! I was actually reading your first message and I was like "That's funny, she skipped Zipper!" But I'm so glad you liked it. I was totally struggling for an idea with them so I was hoping an office wedding would be cute. It seems like it worked for those that read it :)

That'll be so nice to see some friends and relax. Even if it's just a couple days. What's your semester like because it sounds like you finish way earlier than out East here if you're already almost at finals week? As a teacher, I'm always fascinated by school systems and particularly academic calendars HAHAHAHAHA 🤓 I'M SCREAMING ABOUT REINVENTING MASHED/BAKED POTATOES. What an honor to be thought of in such a remarkable video.

Don't you worry about chatting with other writers on here. I am in miss freedomfireflies DM's AT LEAST twice a month and making her listen to me whine and complain about my lack of interaction. She is extremely kind to put up with me 😭

I am definitely feeling less bad about not posting as frequently. I have something queued up for Thursday but I'm thinking about moving it to Monday or maybe even NEXT Thursday. I don't think Monday's are a big day for reading. At least not during a school year and I think many of my readers are in college/university/etc. Or just working, idk. ANYWAYS, it's just me having a little pity party hehehehehe I am constantly overwhelmed. Idk if I've ever been regularly whelmed and i've definitely never been underwhelmed lol. I feel like it's just part of my personality. Like I have brown hair and brown eyes and I'm always overwhelmed HAHAHA

TBH I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE PARAMORE INSPO WHEN I READ IT THE FIRST TIME HAHAHAHAHAHAHA but regardless, I am glad someone had an idea for that one too because I was certainly at a loss.

So good to have you back, bestie 💕 thanks for being so nice and sweet to me!

xoxo

[hugheshugs]

Hey! I hope your having a great day/night!

But I was wondering if you could do a request for Jack Hughes and make if fluffy where he’s being pretty clingy bc he hasn’t been around y/n a lot? Totally fine if not!! thanks a lot if you do though!

hihi !! this was sent in a long time ago but i hope you're having a great day or night as well. i decided to post some blurbs for the birthday boy. happy birthday jack rowden <3

you had an inkling you knew what was coming. you and jack started dating before he left for new jersey, so you'd been together for a while now, but he never got used to the feeling of not having you in his arms.

it was a luxury at this point. so when he came back home to michigan and you were on summer vacation, most of your time would be spent at his place.

the first day was rough. he almost started crying in your arms.. in front of his family.

"jack, baby, what's wrong?" you muttered into his ear, holding him tight.

he burried his head further into the crease of your neck. "i just missed you a lot."

you heard him sniffle and let out a small sigh before lightly dragging him up to his bedroom. you closed the door behind you and pulled away from him for a split second, only to be pulled right back.

"hey, i'm just going to grab you some comfy clothes. i'm right here, okay?" you spoke softly, bringing your hand up to the nape of his neck.

"i'm fine in these," he murmured with an arm squeezing your waist.

"you're wearing jeans and a fat ass jacket. c'mon bub, let's get you changed."

he let out a low whine before reluctantly letting you go, following closely behind you. you rolled your eyes with a small smile on your face.

god, i love him, you thought to yourself.

you grabbed his favourite hoodie and a pair of sweats from his dresser before holding them out to him. he simply stared at you, red eyed.

"jack, my love. you need to change," you told him, slowly shaking the clothes in your stretched out hand for him to take.

his bottom lip quivered. "can you help me? please?"

you nearly cooed at the sight. "of course i can, anything for you."

after helping him out of his old clothes and into the new, you both settled into his bed. you wrapped your arm around him and brought him close, which he took as a sign to rest his head on your chest and drape an arm over you.

he pressed light kisses to the skin on your exposed neckline, mumbling little things like i missed you so much and i don't know how to live without you.

"jack?"

he hummed as he closed his eyes, relishing your embrace.

"did something happen?"

with a shake of his head, he let out a tired sigh. you brought your hand to his hair, massaging his scalp to calm him down.

"just missed you," he said quietly. "had a good season, got injured.. just wished you were there."

you ducked down to press a soft kiss to his head. "i'm here now. we've got months together, let me make up for not being there."

he shook his head once more. "you've already made up for it. this is enough, thank you y/n."

"i love you jack. i'm sorry, i really am," you apologized with a whisper. the boy was tuckered out, you could tell by the way his breathing began to slow.

"no sorries.. i love you more."

needless to say you stayed still until he woke up hours later, and again, he wouldn't let you go.

[ushiwakaout]

I-bRO your what the Haikyuu bois would say is so awesome! Could I request that but for Kuroo? I'm literally such a simp for the roosterhead! Thanks so much ♡

Thank you 🥺 that means a lot.

i love kuroo 😖 i hate fannon kuroo ngl, so many people think he’s a sex god (well even cannon kuroo is probably a sex god once he figures out how to work his willy but u know) and he’s honestly just a dumb chem nerd.

Let us just say that you work for him as a personal assisten 

Warnings: HAIYUUU TIMESKIP

“Hey, honey... Breakfast is ready.” (5:00 am)

“No dont worry, i didnt make it... You know I cant cook to save my life.”

“I just went down the street to buy you a coffee and some sweet bread.”

“You always wake up earlier than I do to get me something, so i just thought to repay you back...”

“Why do you always think there is a catch?”

“Fine, you caught me... I need you to help me make an itinerarie for our upcoming not-so-vacation, vacation.”

“I would have told you yesterday but we where, busy~”

“Ow! Do not hit me, I’m your boss.”

You: “More the reason!”

“More the reason my ass, hurry up and get ready, we gotta get to the office.”

“Oh yeah, we also have meetings all day today so wear something comfortable.”

“You ready to go?” (6:30 am)

“Give me a little twirl baby.”

*will slap you ass when you pass him to leave your home*

*he is def laughing past you and you’re like alright bet*

you: “Hey baby come here, give me a kiss”

“Oh now you wanna give me a kiss, you gotta reach for it, honey ~ ”

*you pull on his tie so he’s at level for a kiss but you only give him a peck before giving his ass a good smack and running to the passanger side of his car*

“Hey! Get back here, I want a decent kiss!”

“Who tought you how to smack so hard?”

“Me? I would never~”

“Come on give me a good kiss.”

“I’m gonna park the car, you go ahead and get a head start without me.”(7:30 am)

you: “What took you so long?”

“What do you mean what took me so long, I was getting you flowers”  

*gives you the bouque of flowers and kiss on the cheek*

“Duh honey~”

“Stop blushing and lets get to work.” (8:00 am)

“Have you seen my pen?”

“Can you go get me some water?”

“Come on give me a kiss before we get to the next meeting.”

“Hey, just because their an assistant doesn’t mean you get to boss them around like that.”

“Says who? You ’re fucking boss and her husband you dibshit- get out my office and I want you to apologize, but don’t you dare look in their eyes because a low life like you doesn’t deserve to.” 

“Oh and ask her to come back in, will you?”

“Hey honey, is it lunch yet?”

you: “You did not have to be so rude...”

“Didn’t have to be rude, my ass. No one gets to talk down to you like that- not even me... Well, I do... But only if you want me too~”

*he do be leaning in for a kiss but you shove your hand onto his face*

you: “Whatchu want for lunch Testu and do not say me because I will quit.” 

“Awe.. Honey you’re no fun...”

HE HAS ONE HUNDRESS PERCENT EATEN YOU KNOW OUT IN HIS OFFICE, HES MADE YOU CUM DURRING MEETINGS AND HAS MADE YOU SIT ON HIS COCK WHILE ON CONVERENCE CALLS AGHHHHH

“Just order me something and get it to go because we don’t have time to go out right now, I’ll make it up to you next time tho.”

“It’s just Y/n with my lunch. Let them in will ya?” (1:00 pm)

“Hey, honey...*whispers* book me an appointment with my chiro will ya? My back is definetly gonna need it... Do it for friday night since we have the weekend off.”

“You’re dismissed.”

*will pat you your thigh before you walk out the door*

*is a very firm believer of not teasing you around co-workers. no pda around the office unless it’s his and the blinds are shut and the door is locked*

“Honey~ let me take a nap on your lap.I’ve got thirty minutes and I’m tired.” (2:30 pm)

“Hey- We have a dinner meeting so I need you to go home, freshen up and get me a new suit- I’ll get ready in the gym bathrooms, I’ll be fine.”

“Let me know when you’re on the way so I can just take a quick wash- hold on give me a kiss before you go.” (3:20 pm)

“You’re on the way back? Pick me up some iced coffee, yeah?”

“You here? Hold on let me put on a towel.” (6:00 pm)

“What you lookin’ at?”

“Oh? Sorry- I’ll cover up~”

“You look real sexy by the way... Give me a kiss.”

“Mmm, if I keep kissing you, were gonna have to head home right now baby~”

you: “Tetsuro, this meeting is literraly about keeping your company and making it a bigger establishment... We are not gonna drop it to go fuck.”

“But honey~”

*smaking the back of his head*

you: “I will leave you high and dry next time you try it.”

*Kuroo def becomes a little pouty after you say that*

*while at dinner a conversation about you breaks through while youre in the restroom*

“So, you’re married to your assistant... How’s that like?” The man in front of him asked, with his own wife absent at the moment. “Oh, um... They’re really great- Y/n a great partner and theirs nothing more I could ask for.” He man scoffs before taking a drink, “Did they work for you before you got marries?” Kuroo nods, “I met them a fem years ago during a one on one interview, they have been working with me ever since.” The executive nodded, clearing his throat. “They a good fuck?” He asked, shocking Kuroo. “Excuse me?” He asked, making sure he didn’t hear him incorrectly. “I asked, are they a good fuck. Someone like that seems too good for our work, bet their probably a sleazy bitch who-” Kuroo go up from his seat a reached over to grab the mans collar. “Speak of my spouse with that manner ever again and i wont hesitate to ruin your life. You know what they learned about you before we got here. They found out that you’re having an affair- and they just happen to be pregnant... Seems to me that your hush money wasn’t enough. How about we tell your wife and kids that you just happened to start a new, hidden, life without them.” Little to Kuroos knowledge you where a few steps behind the table and happen to hear everything your husband had just threatened to spill. “Tetsuro...” You mumbled, setting your hand on his shoulder. “Sit down...” You looked back at the executive and smiled sadisticly, “You heard my husband... Finding about your second life wasn’t so hard.. Maybe I could send it to your wife in a matter of seconds if you don’t get up from this table, agree to our side of the contract and then leave. We’d like to enjoy our dinner in peace.”

“How much did you hear?”

“Right... Let’s just forget this ever happened and enjoy the dinner we deserve.”

“That was so, so, delicious” (8:00 pm)

“Did you enjoy your dinner?”

“Good, let’s get a bottle to go, yeah?”

“Home, sweet fucking home.”

“Come here, we’ll open the bottle later.”

*ya’ll accidentally fall asleep on the couch bc you guys work so hard together... its a cute sight*

Extra:

you: “Kuroo wake up, someones trying to get in.”

“No one is trying to break in.”

Kenma: “No she’s right I was trying to break in... I forgot my switch charger here and I need it.”

More of Husband Kuroo: here

[tartagliaxx]

**contains multiple trigger warnings so please just ignore to be safe

to r anon,

i'm going to be honest with you. the feelings that you are experiencing right now are beyond what i have felt. i can't even begin to imagine how painful this must be for you but i'll try my best to understand and be here for you. i say this a lot but i'm proud of you. you working things through and living another day is no easy feat. i know that it's hard and i know that you're really trying and i appreciate that. healing, recovering, feeling better... if there was anything i learned from my experiences, it's that none of those come with just one day. it might seem tedious and not worth it. i mean, you said it yourself. sometimes it feels like you're not getting any better so what's the point? the thing is, the fact that you woke up today and fought to live despite how horrible things are for you means that this tiring process is worth something. life is something with immeasurable value and to strive to protect that would always be worth something.

i know that you have a good heart deep down but sometimes, i wish you'd be a little more selfish. it might sound contradictory but i feel like you deserve to put yourself first too. while taking your exam, you chose to keep quiet because you didn't want to disturb others and i understand that. i probably would've done the same but i can't help but tell you that i wish you got yourself out of the room especially since it made you uncomfortable. getting into college is a good goal, maintaining high grades too but i know too well the feeling of being afraid that you'll disappoint others. i must be sounding like a hypocrite now but i wish you could one day live for yourself instead of others. you're a great person. genuinely i believe that. when this blog was just starting out, it was you who motivated me to keep on posting even if no one was keeping their eyes on me but you see, i don't know who you are. i don't know your achievements and i don't know your grades. i do know one thing though and that's the fact that when i practically had no one to talk to during vacation, it was your messages that i awoke to and it made me so happy. you're a genuinely kind and compassionate person and you're worth so much more than an exam and a card. i took robotics once for hs. i was good at it but sometimes i still got low marks bc of a suddenly malfunctioning part. it didn't make me less of a good programmer. it's just that unforeseeable things affect us every day and it might affect our performance too. you might not have been in your best form today but that doesn't mean you're not a brilliant person. just like an unexpected error, your mental health stopped you from performing your best, and y'know? that's fine. bc our definitions of best changes every day. sometimes my best is sitting through a lecture and sometimes it's finishing twelve tasks in one sitting. you're trying your best right now and for me, that's all that matters.

i've had that thought that maybe if i performed less exceptionally back then, i wouldn't be so tired and unmotivated today. and you know what? maybe that's the case. but the thing is, this is me now. i get straight a's and i'm proud of it. i can ponder about the what-ifs for as long as i want but it wouldn't change the fact that i am now someone who is looked up to. it hasn't all been too bad and maybe you can say that the bad outweighs the good. maybe you're right but i also don't want to wash over the good little things i had. if it weren't for my high standards, i wouldn't be needing release. i wouldn't be writing, i wouldn't have met the special people i have in my life now. and yes, this might seem like a twisted and round-about way of thinking about it but it worked for me.

i think it's important to look at the present, not the future. if we're so keen on the idea of the future, the present loses its value. a song will end but that doesn't mean we can't appreciate the few minutes of happiness it'll bring us. a book will have a 'the end' but that doesn't mean that the ride was invaluable. a life would end but that doesn't mean it can't be satisfying nor does it need to end now. there are so many reasons to live and idk. the reasons i have, at least, make me hope that the future ahead of me before my inevitable death would be worth whatever pain i'm feeling now. i also don't think this is punishment because i know that you didn't do anything wrong. no one deserves this kind of pain imo. mental illnesses are illnesses. it's scientific. it's not some abstract idea that befalls the evil. it ails the patients and though you contract it differently, everyone deserves to be treated for it.

thank you for coming to me today and for trusting me with this. it sucks. like it really sucks that you're going through this but i think we can get through this together. my personal development prof said smth back then and it goes, "it's one thing to stay positive amid adversity but it's another to just accept that life is adversity itself. adversaries, however, are not permanent. it changes and goes. stick around to witness it unwind. it's one of the grotesque ways the world proves your resilience to yourself."

also yes, genshin boys so valid. they also were like,, my last line of defense back in summer break. i'm so sorry i can't offer any help beyond this. idek if what i said made sense bc like,, i'm not the best person to come to when it comes to feelings but like i said, i want to try and i want to be there for you. i love you lots honey. i hope you feel better soon.

[fallenrepublick]

hmmmmmm.... d r a g o n (got inspiration from Daenerys from GOT (yes, yes shoot me for watching it, I only did it for the dragons))

(also will be based on how dany got the damn dragon eggs so theres that(which if you dont know, long story short she got them as a wedding gift and they were supposed to be "stone" but they werent and also the way the eggs hatch will be different I'm not a fucking fire retardant ok))

so thrawn is probably on some weird af planet

when he finds some vendor selling trinkets n such

thrawn eyes around and then spots a large-ish box with three reptilian looking eggs

he picks one up, inspecting it, while the vendor asks if he wants to buy them. thrawn asks what they are, the vendor explains that these used to be dragon eggs, but time has turned them to stone. since you were both recently married, he decided "fuck it, why not" and bought them

when he got back, you were grateful that he was thinking of you, and you set them in your office, so whenever you felt sad that he wasnt there, you could just look over and be reminded of him

anyway one day you were moving your office, and deciding to redecorate, you took the dragon eggs back to your quarters and then went back to clean up your vacant office

when you got back, you were tired, and deciding to just say fuck it, you took a quick power nap

when you woke, you looked around your quarters to see everything fucked up, like a bat on bath salts roamed around. you also then noticed the 3 tiny winged creatures next to you

thrawn was originally surprised when you went to him in your pjs and he was even more surprised when he saw three tiny dragons sitting on your shoulders

"... my dear, what are those?" "idk man I woke up and they were t-" *screeching* "GET IT OFF ME, GET IT OFF-"

eli did not have a good experience with the biggest one, whom at first sight of eli, flew over to him and straight up started to claw his face off

tarkin was a little surprised but he was more interested in the fact that they actually listened to you. you had trained them for the first few months and they were getting better

they looked at yularen and gave him this look of a mixture of "I feel pity for you" and "I'm going to burn you to the ground"

krennic just ran when they flew after him

kallus and pryce learned from the others to just stay away from the three little terrors

they even learned how to attack things and when to stop ("bro it was just a prank" "... get him." "it was a joke, it was a joke, yO, IT WAS A FUCKING JO-)

first time they saw vader they immediately knew "hmmm s a f e". eli couldnt get over the fact that they saw him as a threat on first sight, but not vader

when they started to get bigger, thrawn had them transported to a planet he had a place on (I hc that whenever he just wants a mini vacation (really rare) he has his own little mansion on a isolated but a planet that he kind of owns)

there they terrorized everyone and then you started to fly around on them. then you were a menace.

srly you once saw that krennic was on the huge landing platform and straight up tried to cremate him then a there ("burn baby burn")

honestly just a bunch of bs I made bc I rewatched the dragon scenes in GOT. it was a fine show and then it just got fukin rekt in the last season

this has been a idea by i d e a anon

Game of Thrones... it’s been eighty four years...

I want dragons, though... Ooo that would be a fun date, like taking Thrawn out on a little flight around the planet on your dragons

[ajkesiah]

All about me

Just to clarify, my name is not AJ, I just prefer that name, its like my online name bc I'm not comfortable sharing my real one.

I'm Filipino, I'm from the Philippines and my mom is Filipino, although my dad isn't, he's German, Irish, and Scottish and hes from America that that makes me Filipino, Irish, Scottish, German and American?

My favorite food is pizza, literally any pizza, pizza is pizza 🤩 and rice cakes, ice cream mochi and just normal mochi, rice, fish, chocolate, strawberry, mint, and orange sherbet ice cream, hamburgers, the Filipino chocolate and strawberry wafer sticks, miso soup, teriyaki chicken, Alfredo, pasta, Chinese chicken, lumpia, and halo-halo, I HAVE A BUNCH MORE

My fav color is purple, green, blue, red and black ❤️

My favorite instrument is the violin and the guitar, all types. I actually play the bass guitar! 😜🎸

My hobbies are drawing, (I'm an artist) sleeping, eating, and hanging out with my friends

I am not an only child, I have an older sister

My fav animes are aot, saiki k, violet evergarden, a silent voice, chainsaw man, and alot more that i cant think of

My fav TV shows/series are the Umbrella Academy, Marlon, K-dramas, Sam and cat, and Victorious (I REMEMBER WATCHING THEM ALL THE TIME)

my fav drink is lemon water, grape and the tropical punch kool aid, chocolate milk (ESP THE ONES IN THE PHILLIPINES) cherry coke and normal coke, mountain dew, and many more

My bday is in January, and I was born on 11:11 am, SERIOUSLY IT LITERALLY SAYS THAT ON MY BIRTH CERTIFICATE I CAN SHOW YOU GUYS

My fav animals are foxes, pandas, woolly monkeys, cats and dogs, parrots, and many more. I actually have a story abt a bird, so I was sitting in class and this bird came up to the window, it had blue, red, green, and yellow LIKE A PARROT but it flew away in a few seconds and there are like no parents around where I live but yeah that's cool

My fav sea animal are sting rays, jellyfish, dolphins and sharks

I've been to the Philippines, Cambodia, Japan, I actual went there to Tokyo when I was a baby 😜 Michigan, Florida, New York, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Massachusetts, Chicago, Hong Kong, Vietnam, Canada, and prob like 1-2 more, I forget. But places I wanna go to is France, South Korea, New Mexico, and Vietnam and Japan again. If we get enough money, my family and I are going back to the Philippines for a vacation there to see our family that lives there. We need 7k to go there and to come back where I live rn. 😕

I have 3 cats

My style is sometimes skater girl, dark academia, cottage core, or really just anything comfy but it still looks nice yk

I have black hair

My eye color is brown, it looks so pretty in the sun 🤩 I've actually been getting so many stuff in my eye lately, I got 4 eyelashes in my eyes yesterday, and shampoo while taking and shower and it stung so bad, I've been getting eyelashes in my eye nonstop for so long. OMG OFJDKF so yesterday I had an eyelash in my eye after my guitar practice, so I tried getting it to the corner of my eye, like the corner near my nose, and it was a small eyelash. And yk your teardrop holes in the corner... you prob already guessed it.... IT GOT STUCK IN THERE. So when it was in the corner it kinda when near my upper eyelid and I blinked THEN I SAW THE TIP OF THE EYELASH IN THE TEARDROP HOLE 😕✌️ IT SCARED ME SO BAD I ALMOST HAD A HEART ATTACK I LITERALLY DID 😭 but I got it out

I have really weird dream

I'm an insomniac, I have every problem that you could think of my life's a mess 😭

I'm broke

really really dirty minded 😜✌️

A/N: I'm getting kinda tired so I might make a part 2 of this? Lmk what questions abt me I should answer if any of you have some. Anyway, have a good night/day <33

[aabikeadventure]

Day 3 and 4. By Adam.

Hello friends! So day 3 was pretty uneventful so we skipped a day of blogging. The hurricane was supposed to roll through with some heavy winds and rain so instead of biking we decided to take our hosts up on their offer to hunker down in their barn while the storm passed. It was a pretty sweet setup and it felt silly to risk getting caught in a storm when we had a giant empty barn to ourselves with a bathroom, sink, wifi and electricity. Oh, and they had a giant garden with tomatoes and corn and zucchini and other tasty vegetables that they told us to help ourselves to. To try and get to telling you about today i'll try to make my summary of Tuesday quick.

We woke up and did yoga in their yard with the neighbor who leads weekly yoga classes. She took a liking to us and offered us a room in her second, unused home next door while the storm was coming through. We were grateful to have a place to stay but the interior was like a 1960's timewarp nightmare plus a yoga studio??? We kinda wished we just stayed in the barn next door with all the good vibes over there... The mattress was awful and we got a horrible nights sleep so we got a rough and late start to the day, getting on our bikes around 9.

We biked into Portsmouth which is a really cute little town! We didn't get to see much of it, but had our breakfast at a nice park on the water. We have been eating really well and mealtimes are definitely a highlight to our days. We then biked through kittery and then up through some beautiful roads with light traffic. And the best part was as soon as we crossed into Maine we were welcomed with a cool ocean breeze that gave us life. Like 10⁰ cooler out of no where! If felt so good. Amalia saw a swim spot that looked nice on a little ocean inlet and wanted to jump in. Im more picky than she is about swimming so I got my feet wet in the very cold water while she swam around and got out with goose bumps, but with a smile on her face. Omg. I have so much to write but it's already 1040 at night and Im moving my fingers as fast as they can go!

Ok so we biked up the coast. More beautiful roads. Then through York, an INSANE touristy beach spot. It was like covid wasn't even real with people packed like sardines on the beach.

It was pretty overwhelming to be around and though I wanted ice cream, we figured there would be more places to stop that weren't so crazy. So we skip doodly dood the fack outta there.

More beautiful roads and it was time for lunch. I saw a beautiful old church with a sprawling shady lawn and plenty of privacy on the side of the road and it was a perfect pick. We were both so tired from no sleep that we ended up curbing out daily mileage goal and spent around 3 hrs making lunch, napping and hanging out. The weather was beautiful and it felt like what we needed.

Then through Ogunquit. Another densely packed tourist trap. Now out of water, we had no choice but to stop. I got us water and some ice cream at a little shop and we sat and people watched as we enjoyed our frozen treat. I love people watching and it's been so long since I've seen many people out and about it felt like overload!

It was now nearing 7 and we needed to find a place to camp before it got dark. Amalia felt a little concerned about finding a good spot since its such a dense touristy area, but I knew we would find something. The bike route took us off route 1 and through a very vacationer heavy beach neighborhood. Things weren't looking so promising and we were hoping maybe we could use a little corner of someone's yard, yet how to make this happen we didn't know. While checking our map a man chatted us up and asked about our tour and talked excitedly about his love of biking and told us of some good trails in Rhode island I didn't know about! We tried to drop a hint that we were looking for a place to crash but he was either 6 beers too deep or just didn't catch our drift. I cut the conversation short when we suggested an RV campground down the road.. oh well. On we went.

And then it happened. Half a mile down the road we biked past a house that looked like it had been here for a while. Not like 90% of the other homes which looked newly remodeled rentals or vacations mansions. An older couple was on the front porch and the man waved and said "hi kids" as we biked past. Amalia and I looked as each other and simultaneously knew we should turn back and see if they could help. Ernie and Sarah are their names and they are SO cute and sweet. Ernie walked is to their beautiful back yard with overflowing garden, wind chimes and hammock and told us to set up where ever we liked. After a moment of internal deliberation he also extended us an invite to use the bathroom and shower in their rear building. What an angel. He said cute things like " I know it's covid but this is how things are supposed to be"- referencing the warmth between strangers that was unfolding. And " we aren't crazy people, we're just old people, you'll be safe here". Ernie grew up in Maine and he and Sarah have lived in this house that belonged to Sarah's parents for twenty years. We set up camp and walked down to the ocean to catch the last of sunset. I'm filled with so much warmth at this experience of bike touring. Amalia told me that it restores your faith in humanity and it really is true. When we got back to our tent there were 2 cold bottles of water waiting for us 😭.

Tomorrow we hope to make it to make it to Brunswick. Though Amalia's goal of 70 miles a day has yet to be met. If we actually get started early it is very doable, though I've been having a lot of problems with comfort which has been slowing us down. My brooks cambium saddle is awful and no matter how I adjust it there's way too much perineal pressure. And the weight on my hands, even with gloves is so much that I'm starting to get hand numbness. I'm kinda bummed that my newly built up touring bike might not be the right fit. Hopefully I just need some different bars and saddle. Amalia and I might switch bikes bc her riding position is much more upright with her bars. Bon nuit all! Good night! Xoxo

[yesterdayiwrote]

I'm sure they're grest friends, but I think them being love interests on the show seem to make Jack not want to show their friendship to fans. Just look at his Instagram. He posts more photos with the other cast members than Conrad. And when he does make a post with Conrad in it, it's to promote something. First a selfie at the triathlon and then the one at Karla's movie screening. Anyways, I hope we get better coliver intimate scenes bc I'm getting tired of Connor just pushing Oliver onto bed.

Why is it so hard for people to believe Jack and Conrad are friends? Jack and Conrad went to a screening of Karla's film together the same day he got back from vacation. That had to planned beforehand..

I think people’s main suggestion is they can’t be proper friends because they only hang out when there’s others there. So Conrad could have gone to the triathalon to support Karla/Alfie or to the movie to support Karla, but I don’t think it really matters. Sure some of them are probably closer than the others, but the one thing that strikes me with this cast is it’s very much a group effort. They get on with each other, they hang out as a group and yeah, people like Jack and Aja seem very close, and there’s loads of examples of them hanging out in pairs but on the whole, it’s a group deal. 

Conrad’s pretty new to the group, but he’s still part of it, so maybe as time goes on we’ll see more of them together, maybe not, it’s hard to tell. Karla doesn’t hang out with them all that much it feels, probably because she has a husband. Who hangs out with who and when is probably just as much down to their own personal schedules rather than some big overriding conspiracy theory. 

I think they’re friends. Not close friends, but they hang out, they get on, maybe there is some hesitance with regard to posting pictures but I guess that’s up to them. Maybe they don’t want to blur the line between character/actor. Maybe they get on SO well that they don’t think about taking pictures when they spend time together? I’m always happy to see any pictures of them hanging out together, whether it’s just the two of them or the cast as a whole, but I guess we’ll never truly know. It’s their business at the end of the day, as long as it’s convincing enough on screen, I’m sold. 

[janiedean]

I'm the anon who said you don't glorify obesity. Look I don't know anything about that ship y'all keep referring to and I don't know who "Hunk" is or whatever, I'm talking in general terms. I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT SHIPPING OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT just to clarify. I think it's wrong that people glorify being skinny but I don't think glorifying obesity is any better (I'm talking about more than overweight - ACTUALLY OBESE)

I’m probably not explaining myself properly but I think people should be able to ship whatever they want, the shipping was never my point. I just think the way people on the internet have been going on like “Fat women are goddesses!!! Real women have curves!!! If you don’t agree you’re fatphobic!!!” is wrong. I have been hospitalized twice for anorexia, I know how being skinny is glorified but I don’t think switching it around so it becomes “being obese is totally awesome and if you say otherwise you’re a horrible fatphobe” is any better. I’m sorry for sending you so many messages, I’ll stop now.

okay so GIVEN THAT WE ALREADY CLARIFIED OURSELVES ON THE MISUNDERSTANDING: the problem is that we were actually talking about shipping XD and the other anon decided it had to be about health but like the problem in general is that as usual (on tumblr and I guess in the US because it’s mostly US beauty standards I’m seeing thrown around) is that there’s no middle way in anything. I mean, like:

body shaming is a thing. in general. the problem is that fatshaming is, like, a thing that is more culturally spread than the contrary even if in some countries (ie italy) there’s this concept that if you’re skinnier than a size 42 (I guess it’s like an S or small M) you’re omg so unhealthy please EAT SOME PUT MEAT ON YOUR BONES WHY DO U HATE GOOD FOOD, but it’s more of an older generation thing. like, I’ve had problems with weight bc when I was in freaking elementary school people would go like ‘omg you’re so fat’ at me and I thought I was and then I looked at some pictures years later and I was like ‘… wtf I was perfectly fine what the hell’ and there’s a general implication that fat/overweight = unhealthy when it’s not necessarily the case.

the problem is that when it comes to body positivity there is like literally zero distinction between curvy, overweight, fat and obese which are not the same thing, and there is zero distinction between body positivity and promote a healthy lifestyle. I mean, according to US standards someone who’s fat would be… like… normal here? a size M is seen as perfectly regular stuff but from what I see of US sizes, M is like OMG I’M FAT already, which… like. here it’s maybe curvy. also being some 3/4kgs overweight never killed anyone. but since I see ZERO DISTINCTION here, it’s all thrown in the same bag and it’s the exact same for people who have 3 kgs more than average, 10, 25, 50 or freaking 200. which is obviously not the same.

also, there is the complete lack of realizing what it means to be healthy and to not be thin. like, as has been said already it’s absolutely not a guarantee that being thin or skinny means that you’re healthy (I had a friend who used to be chubby, then got sick with a freaking chronic disease and came out of it with a body that ended up finding her a job as a fashion model but SHE STILL WAS HEALTHIER BEFORE THE FREAKING CHRONIC DISEASE), I’ve struggled with my extra kgs all my damned life and whenever I go on vacation with friends that are thinner than me but move around less or don’t go to the gym and the likes I am the one who can walk for longer or gets tired less and I have better blood tests than my father who’s at his ideal weight and takes five pills for a bunch of different stuff. some people are just heavier as a body type but if it’s their body and it’s not due to shitty eating or lack of exercise or whatever then they’re not unhealthy. obviously severely obese people who can’t walk for more than twenty minutes without feeling like fainting aren’t in that category but like never mind that for a moment, the problem is that your size doesn’t automatically mean unhealthy and having 20 extra kgs on you makes you fat maybe but not freaking obese.

THEN, on body positivity: there is a healthy difference between NOT BEING A JERK and spreading awareness re healthy habits. like, society/media and the likes shouldn’t promote being thin, they should promote being healthy ie eating well and exercising, not THIN = HEALTHY. as stated you can be healthy without being thin. (or, as the character we were talking about that you weren’t referencing, you can be mostly muscle and have some chub over it and THAT’S NOT BEING OBESE XD at the same time, if someone is overweight or obese or whatever for any reason whatsoever you can’t go at them and tell them omg go lose some weight you loser THAT’S HORRIBLE. I mean, there’s a difference between saying that one should try to be as healthy as possible and go like OMG YOU’RE FAT YOU’RE HORRIBLE. if body positivity means not shaming someone else for their body then go the fuck for it. the problem is that then according to people saying ‘okay but if you can’t walk to the supermarket and back without feeling short of breath and you might get heart diseases maybe you should consider dropping some extra weight for your own benefit’ is fatphobic which… lolno. not everyone is fat because of bad habits and they shouldn’t have people making them feel bad even if they are but assuming that the above sentence (especially when doctors recommend you to do more exercise) is inherently fatphobic imo is ridiculous. if my doctor tells me I should lose some weight then I’m gonna consider it and I’m not gonna feel like he’s *phobic*, if someone goes like ‘omg you’re so fat you’ll never find a guy who wants you’, that is fatphobic. like, THERE’S A DIFFERENCE. (at the same time people who are skinny/thinner than average shouldn’t get told all the time OMG PUT SOME MEAT ON THAT SKELETON REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES like fuck’s sake respect all body types. being a real woman has zero to do with how much meat you have on you.) what should be glorified is be healthy and be happy with whatever body type you have as long as it doesn’t cause you problems and at that point nicely try to make those problems right while you’re encouraged without shaming anyone in the process. (which also means: gdi don’t put other people down if they’re trying to gain weight or lose it, ffs.)

now, the problem with shipping: the thing is - and I swear to god I don’t wanna sound like a sjw now but I hope the previous essay has made clear how I feel in general on this issue - that, in my experience, fat/overweight characters especially if they’re male are seen as… either the laughing stock of the group or the harmless nerd or anyway never as sexual objects. every damned time I ship something where a guy is overweight/fat (notable exceptions jacob and queenie from fantastic beasts which tbh really was a nice surprise for the part where the fat guy who’s also a sweetheart hooks up with the bombshell and it’s THE BEST ROMANCE OF ALL good go you man) right as rain there’s rarely fic for it least of all porn, and even if there is someone will go around saying the fat character isn’t attractive or deserving of getting some. when I say ‘sam tarly syndrome’ I mean ‘fat/overweight guy is a sweetheart who has a lot of nice ships they could be in but they get thoroughly ignored or if it happens in canon fandom lols at it’. I mean, I basically had to start the jon/sam tag on my own (if you see the fics at the beginning it’s honestly sad to see TEN of mine all after the other), once on a kinkmeme I was like ‘okay doing it’ at a pwp prompt and I got as an answer OMG I WAS HOPING YOU’D SEE THIS NO ONE ELSE IN THIS FANDOM WRITES PORN FOR THESE TWO and whenever people discuss canon sex scenes…. the only one in the book that always gets lol-ed at is sam and gilly’s in spite of the fact that okay, it’s badly written, but ALL of the sex scenes in asoiaf except one are badly written. it’s not worse than the average. but sam getting some because a relatively hot girl wants him and the sex - omg! - actually being somewhat not vanilla is seen as… like… OMG HAHAHAHAHA I CAN’T BELIEVE HE’S GETTING SOME OMG HOW EMBARRASSING as if this guy being overweight means he can’t be seen as a palatable partner when it comes to having a sex life. same as the other anon being like ‘omg hunk (the person we were referring) is fat and unhealthy so he’s not good enough for the other person’ is… exactly the same. I mean, this hunk character is admittedly the one person in that bunch I’d actually date irl same as sam is the one character from asoiaf I’d date irl the others are completely out of the question, but since they’re *fat* naaaaah? and guess what sam/WHOEVER is a lot less popular than ships which make a lot less sense but are two hot characters stashed together bc they’re hot. (jaime/sansa has like 300+ fics and jon/sam is still under 100 but okay sure tell me it’s because it makes no sense. lol no. and being that the only porn around for those two was written by me and maybe two/three other people says all.)

at that point then people go like ‘well but it’s because they’re unhealthy’ and that is when it becomes ridiculous. because going with the above problem re fatshaming being a thing that happens on a societal level, it becomes IF YOU’RE FAT YOU’RE NOT SEXUALLY DESIRABLE AND NO ONE SHOULD WANT YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR UNHEALTHY WEIGHT, which mixes stuff that doesn’t even go together with being sexually desirable which is something inherently personal. as in: if someone who’s unhealthily fat for whichever reason has a significant other who loves them and their body guess what THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO HAVE A SEXUAL LIFE AND TO BANG PEOPLE/GET BANGED TO THEIR PLEASURE. because when it comes to preferences in the bedroom or loving a person, size can be a thing - some people have certain body shapes preferences and so on - or it cannot be a thing at all and anyway it doesn’t matter when it comes to your right to be seen as desirable/being desirable. people of all sizes can be desirable or sexy or definitely sexually available regardless of the size - like everyone is freaking allowed to be sexually desirable even if they don’t conform to whichever is the beauty canon around.

and given that I personally got told more than once also by admittedly well-meaning people that they wouldn’t ever consider seeing me as desirable because I was overweight or not as thin as other hot person around our class or even better, the aforementioned friend who turned out to be a fashion model using that as some coping mechanism (as in, she didn’t like being sick obv. but since she had come out of it with a scorching hot physique while I had then undiagnosed pcos so I was struggling with weight all the damned time and I was healthy otherwise... er let’s say that she used to tell me stuff like ‘ah well look at you and look at me instead how much better looking I am’ which obviously was in order to make herself feel better about her illness but sure as hell didn’t help me feeling good about myself), I’m honestly fucking tired of this whole trend in shipping where overweight/fat people don’t get any from their hot best friends with whom they’re absolutely shippable but the hot friends get shipped instead with the most improbable hot people that happens in 90% of fandoms I run into. because it’s just a reflection of how irl if you’re overweight a lot of the time people will say that your weight puts you out of the goddamned dating field and everyone deserves to be in there, damn it, regardless of their size. it has nothing to do with being healthy or unhealthy. and saying shit like ‘omg X is fat they’re not good enough for Y’ is really fucking old already. 

 tldr: I hope I made clear why I got pissed at the other anon and what I think of the whole matter. obviously no one has to glorify being *unhealthy* (extreme obesity and anorexia are both unhealthy) and no one needs to put other groups down while doing it (looking at you n*icki m*inaj - like sorry but according to my standards she’s thin, having a nice ass doesn’t make you *fat* or curvy, and going like FUCK ALL THOSE SKINNY BITCHES is the exact contrary of body positivity tbh). but at the same time everyone deserves to be seen as sexually desirable and it’s bullshit that the current narrative depicts being overweight as something undesirable. both in society and in fandom.

/peace

[jaspersforever]

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