#and i'm making good headway on the other projects i've been hinting around so
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i'm constantly searching out different pockets of samsara to find where i belong to no avail. nothing feels right enough, nowhere feels safe enough, inadvertently starving myself of the love i require to move all these mountains without a net to fall back into or a hope to cling onto. and you know me, you know i'm always doing the thing where i spoil people with love only to wind up the giving tree, lonely is such the martyr in me, i know. lately i am blistered and numb, food is tasteless and the little joys have become fewer and farther between. i yearn to ignore the horrors within so i learn every little detail about people i'll never see again and wonder about them in moments well past their casual departures. i find the intimate details in those closest to me even for moments, wonder aloud about their lives and count the freckles on their nose, and these have become my more delightful bits of time passing. i struggle with the notion of having no real use or place and then feeling despised any time i do make headway on potentially finding any little version of it. i don't want to feel alone so i put myself in situations with people where i only alienate and isolate deeper than had i never left my little hiding spot at all. i worry for people who in turn find me odd and unnerving, find reasons to excuse their treatment and the things they say that they think i can't hear. a real love thine enemies type conundrum. and look, i get it, okay? none of this is real and i am essentially being held hostage in a dark room, blindfolded into a state of constant projections and illusions. like fine, whatever, i've accepted it and can only play these silly little games at this point to distract from the pain of it all. constant hints of it being my fifth year in this realm since the reset and yet everyone seems to forget i have been here since the first dawn, i remember everything and i pierce through the veil a lot better than anyone thinks. and also it's like, who even cares at this point? i am starting to miss all the people who left me for dead. the bloody rabbit everyone is laughing at comes back to haunt them deep into the night but no one is laughing when furniture shakes and pictures fly off the walls as i'm demanding to play. nobody wants to play these games once i start winning, vicious children throwing their controllers in frustration at the monitors. i develop sixteen crushes in a week and have disconnected from all of them by noon. voids filled and then emptied again like water barrels in a flood storm, i am constantly reminded of how i cannot afford to be naive but so desperately want a companionship that only the huntsmen want to provide. and sometimes pride morphs into apathy through a rigorous programming of emotional starvation that eventually i'm just like, yeah that's fine, just make sure to love me before you destroy me. but then they don't even finish the job and i am left broken winged while someone feels too conflicted to face me. there's always someone that leaves me for dead but doesn't kill me, needs to explore what else is out there and when I manage to crawl out the grave, the anger boils and rage rushes through the winds because how dare I not only survive but move on? how dare i not sink deeper into the pit and wait ever so patiently with such gratitude for the dirt i am fed?
a couple of months ago i sobbed hysterically in my bathtub every night praying for a real friend and every day i look around and wonder, is it you? is this another trick? am i eternally placed in battlefields having to dodge the mines of deceit while other people get to leisurely laugh over beignets and reminisce about their wild night out with their trusted companions? people tell me to leave for my own good and i wonder if it's because they work for the enemy. i am constantly hiding in plain sight and have been my whole life, often veiled by a jealous man that wants to own me like a dog and barely feed me scraps even when i am being good, even when i so loyally and lovingly greet him at his feet and sing his praises better than anyone else. any sense of true love or friendship from anyone else and he is out to destroy it before it begins, wants to keep me in my little hole unseen and starving only for him. i wish to be untethered from all that attempts to deplete me of my light or siphon from me in any way, it's been so long now and i am so tired from being robbed. i want to look into a set of eyes that remind me how different the world can be if i just tilt my head a certain way and see it from a different axis point. i want to be one with the stars and to tell someone it's going to be okay even when we are both scared shitless, i know that when it comes from my voice it is more believable because even i start to become convinced. and i know that i can pull myself out of anything and survive the hardest hits, but i'm very tired from doing it alone for so long and it seems like there should have been some sort of reprieve by now. it is very exhausting never knowing who to trust and feeling like there is no one above corruption, that people will eye me suspiciously from vicious gossip and a looming sense that i can't possibly be the person i portray myself as, as if i could ever find the energy within me to put on an act after all this gut wrenching honesty i hand out so casually on a normal day. i want to live by the ocean, i want to be a child again, i want a path that isn't worn down by all the battered and broken people who did it before me. the energy needs to be cleared, the room feels too stuffy, my lens needs adjusting because all i can see is someone that everyone else wants to hunt down like ravenous beasts under a blood moon and i don't like the sound of butterfly nets clanking together when observing something so pretty and free. i know all too well what it means to be locked in a little cage by the watchful eyes of a possessive handler and i won't do it to someone else, even when the inkling starts to take over and i ache to hide away in these teeny tiny little pockets of samsara to kiss your face quietly while the stampede tramples everything in its path outside of us. and i feel stupid and sore and like the nightmare may never end, but then i look at you and for like, the smallest most miniscule moment, i can see the ocean and hear the waves and i swear to god i am a child again. i swear to god with you i am free.
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To Love Him Is To Need Him Everywhere // Ashton Irwin
The evolution of this fic has been WILD, I started it FOREVER ago after Ash made a series of IG posts about a camping trip but my premise never felt quite right. About a month ago I decided to adapt what I had into a birthday fic and that sparked so many ideas that I couldn't stop writing and missed posting for his birthday entirely! Thank you to @cal-puddies for reassuring me that sometimes 11k word PWPs are justified (lmao) and helping me navigate my feelings when the story started accidentally getting very very soft for some reason.
Warnings: Boyfriend!Ash, birthday!Ash, honestly some of the softest, most sentimental stuff I've written but juxtaposed with maybe some of the filthiest. Scenes of both rough and soft sex, oral and manual stimulation of a male and a female, a scene of extended cum play. A few moments of dom!Ash (followed by aftercare). Tons of dirty talk. A brief scene and mentions of weed smoking. Everything takes place on this camping trip so we've affectionately been referring to it as "forest fucking," take from that what you will lol.
Word Count: 11,575
Masterlist // Ko-Fi and 2021 Taglist linked above
Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated!
“Sweetheart, I appreciate the gesture but I’m not wearing that.”
Ashton skeptically tosses a loud yellow trucker hat proudly bearing the phrase “BIRTHDAY BOY” onto the coffee table.
“I had a feeling you might say that so luckily, I’ve brought options,” you smirk, reaching into your bag.
“Luckily,” he snorts.
You do your best game show model flourish as you lay out an increasingly absurd selection of novelty hats: a cowboy hat exclaiming “Yee-haw it’s my birthday!”, a classic black snapback with an “Over The Hill” tombstone design, and your personal favorite, a trucker hat featuring a variety of cartoon turtles encouraging you to “Shell-ebrate.”
He cackles and you beam at having made him laugh so genuinely. “Just think of the gift you could’ve gotten me if you hadn’t over-budgeted for prank headgear,” he teases, wrapping an arm around you.
“I’m finally letting you take me camping, is that not good enough?” You object with a joking pout, which he slyly pecks away. “Besides, I feel like you’ll be more than pleased with the types of gifts I plan on giving you.” You raise an eyebrow suggestively and slink out of his embrace before he can react.
“Well let’s get fucking going then!” He enthuses with a giggle, picking the “Shell-ebrate” hat up off the table and fitting it onto his head.
Ash finishes loading the truck he rented while you climb into the passenger seat, sitting your travel mugs in the cup holders and pulling up the GPS info. Your boyfriend happily whistles to himself as he closes up the back, excitedly tapping the top of the camper shell before climbing into the cabin next to you. He turns to you, beaming, and you can’t help but grin back.
“Ready for an adventure, my love?” He teases as he starts up the car.
“I ask myself that question everyday that I wake up next to you,” you joke, leaning in to give him a quick kiss. “Answer’s always yes.”
The drive up to the forest is already the relaxing, bonding experience you both didn’t know you needed so badly. All that matters is what’s next on the playlist, how long you should hold out before you stop for coffee again and whether you prefer his hand holding yours or resting on your thigh. It’s glorious.
You arrive at the campsite in the afternoon and are surprised but pleased to find the area you chose is deserted. Ash begins unloading the car, eager to show off the tent building skills he’s been brushing up on via YouTube videos. You decide to utilize one of the campground’s picnic tables for a makeshift supply station and start setting out and organizing all the necessities you’ll want to keep accessible, like flashlights, lanterns and bug spray.
Your task doesn’t take long and you lean against the table to watch Ashton work; it’s immediately both endearing and amusing how much the struggle he’s having with the project is at odds with his positive attitude towards it. You shuffle over and try to subtly sneak a peek at the directions to see if you can assist.
“Oh hey baby, you wanna maybe hold these two pieces together while I lift the other side?” He casually asks, as if he hasn’t been assembling this section for the past 10 minutes.
You do as he asks, giggling at how quickly the tent starts taking shape now that you’re helping. “Finally had to admit this was a two-person task, huh?” You joke, moving on to the next section.
“Please, I just know what an expert you are at helping me pitch a tent,” he cracks.
You laugh in spite of yourself. “Ok, that’s on me, I don’t know why I didn’t see it coming.”
“Yeah, you usually tend to say that sometime after the tent pitching too.”
He wiggles his eyebrows exaggeratedly and you shake your head, laughing. His jokes are lame but they mean he’s in a goofy mood and you love him like that.
Working together, the tent is easily assembled and all that’s left to do is secure it to the ground. You drag over the bag of metal pegs to where Ash is pulling one of the rope lines tight, measuring where to place it.
“I think here is about right if you want to go ahead,” he instructs.
You hold a hand to your chest and mock swoon. “Are you finally asking me to peg you, babe?”
Without missing a beat, he hands you the mallet from the bag. “Pound away, baby.”
You giggle and the two of you easily finish securing the tent, bantering suggestively. Flirting with Ash always makes the time fly by and the rest of the campsite is set up in no time. You sit just inside the mesh door of the tent, organizing things, while he stands outside admiring your teamwork.
The tent rustles as he tests the strength of your build. “Think we did a nice job, baby. Barring some crazy destructive act of god, should hold up nicely,” he comments, jiggling the poles near the roof.
“Act of god is nothing. The real question is will it withstand all the shell-ebrating we’re going to do inside it,” you quip.
Ashton laughs as he crawls inside the tent and sprawls out on the air mattress. “If you’re referring to our intimate bonding time, I’d prefer to leave the cartoon turtles out of it,” he jokes.
You look over at him, classic rock tee pulling tightly across his chest as he stretches, long tattooed arms reaching all the way to the back wall of the tent because he’s so big he barely fits on the mattress. A combination of mischief and desire flows through your veins as you crawl over to settle next to him.
“Specifically right now I was referring to me taking your cock down my throat,” you state, holding his gaze as you flirtatiously trace your finger around the waistband of his jeans.
He smirks at your declaration, lust shining in his hazel eyes. “Well, now that does sound intimate, doesn’t it?” He teases, moving your hand down to feel him half-hard already. You raise an eyebrow to him and he shrugs, “Kinda hot watching you handle those tools back there, was hoping you might be feeling frisky.”
You grin and lean to give him a heated kiss while your hands adeptly undo his pants. “Please, when am I not frisky for you, handsome?” You kiss along his jaw before slowly slinking down his body, settling at his waist. “Honestly I meant to blow you on the way here but I got caught up in the scenery, I’m really running behind schedule on your birthday festivities.”
Ash’s laugh turns to a choked moan as you mouth at him over his boxers. "Yeah you planned this whole trip for me but failed to suck me off upon arrival, was beginning to doubt your devotion," he smirks, propping himself up on his elbows to see you pull his cock out, lazily smiling as you teasingly lick up and down the sides with just the tip of your tongue.
"Whatever could I possibly do to make it up to you?" You tease, tracing your lips over and over with his tip before briefly sucking him into your mouth.
You roll your tongue around his head before pushing him from your mouth so you can press wet, open-mouthed kisses up and down his shaft. When you reach the tip again, you wrap your lips around it, lightly suckling while letting spit run out of your mouth and drip down his cock. You feel his eyes watching your every move and know the visual alone has got to be driving him crazy; you decide to add to it by bringing your hand up to slowly stroke him, spreading your spit around his length until he’s totally coated and shiny for you.
He sucks in a breath, uninterested in playing it cool. “Fuck, baby… so hot when you’re messy with it,” he groans. You pull off and give him a smirk that makes him groan even deeper. He strokes a hand over your face, tracing his thumb over your lips, letting out a naughty chuckle when you suck his thumb into your mouth and flutter your tongue over the pad. “You’re in a mood, aren’t ya?”
You casually shrug and get back to work, giving him a show by sticking your tongue out flat and slapping his cock across it; a thrill runs through you when he visibly shudders in reaction to the wet plop that each smack makes. Next you grip him by the base and sink your mouth slowly down his length. As you pull back up, you’re sure to angle yourself so that he gets a good view of the outline of his cock pressing against your cheek, giving him the bulging illusion that he’s far too big for your mouth to contain. You play this game a few more times, listening to his muttered curses become more and more frequent.
A loud pop sounds throughout the tent as you pull off to look at him; you squeeze your thighs together at the sight of his long curls dangling in his face, him fighting the urge to close his eyes but not wanting to miss a second of your filthy display. You love knowing you can affect him this way, there’s really no other feeling quite like it. You tug at his cock and flick over his tip again, giving a long “mmm” as you taste the precum that’s started to bead there.
“Jesus, baby, it’s gonna be a long trip with you, isn’t it?” Ashton half-giggles, half-moans at the movements of your tongue. His voice has a slight desperate edge to it as he sighs, “Come on, love, no more teasing.”
“Anything you say, birthday boy,” you lilt.
You lower your mouth on him at an excruciatingly slow pace, not stopping until he hits the back of your throat and you have to pause to collect yourself as your gag reflex kicks in. You start to bob, taking a little more of him each time, playing up the coughs and chokes you’re letting out because you know that secretly gives him a sense of pride. You keep working him down your throat, continuing to let your spit fall freely, your hand stroking what won’t fit in your mouth. You swirl your tongue along the underside of his shaft as you pull back up and the long, exaggerated moans he lets out every time tell you he’s getting close.
“Eager today, aren’t we?” You pant, fingertips ghosting over the sides of his cock as you grin at him.
Ash cackles, “You can’t tease me like that and then zing me for not lasting!” He looks down at you, cheeks stained with tears, chin shiny with drool. The blend of lust and adoration in his voice is intoxicating as he dabs at your face and says in a low voice, “Make me cum, messy girl.”
You practically purr at his request, quickly sinking back down. You take him deep again, getting him as far as you can and holding him there, fluttering your tongue around until you have to pull back to breathe. He grips your hair as you come up and you know that’s your signal he’s at the point of no return. You bob a couple more times and then briskly stroke his length while licking over his slit.
“Fuckin’ hell, baby… such a good…” His praises end abruptly as his body tenses and his cock starts spurting cum across your tongue. You hum approvingly as you wrap your lips around him, swallowing down every drop he has for you.
You’ve barely pulled off before he’s bringing you up to his lips to kiss you. “Thank you, baby,” he mumbles, stroking his fingers through your hair. You settle in next to him, lazily kissing as he comes down; his hand starts to wander between your legs and you shoo him away. He objects, “I know that got you wet, love. Let’s make you cum too.”
“That one was a freebie. It’s your birthday, get used to it,” you wink.
You lay your head on his chest and the two of you enjoy the silence for a few moments before dozing off for a much needed nap. You wake up to the smell of coffee and the sounds of an acoustic guitar being softly plucked; before you open your eyes to see you’re alone in your tent, you would’ve sworn you were back at home, waking up on a lazy Sunday morning.
You peek your head out of the tent and smile at the sight of Ashton looking cozy in his red and black baja hoodie, lounging in a camping chair mindlessly playing his guitar, breeze blowing through his hair.
You take your time slipping your shoes back on, digging through your luggage for one of his other hoodies you packed for yourself, listening to him create a calming ambiance. You head outside and don’t waste a second bounding over to him to place a soft kiss on his cheek. Before you can walk away, he sets the guitar aside and pulls you into his lap.
“Didn’t mean to wake you,” he murmurs into your neck.
You push his hair out of his face and behind his ears. “One of my favorite ways to wake up,” you admit. “Possibly the best way… definitely Top 3.”
He smirks. “The other ways being…”
“Maybe you can help me lock in my list sometime,” you shrug coyly. He giggles and joyfully kisses you.
Before long, the sun is starting to set and it's dinnertime. Ash gives you a quick overview of the camping stove and you throw the frozen hamburger patties on the grill while he lugs out the firewood you bought on the way up and sets about building a fire.
“I can feel you staring,” he teases, adding some more kindling to his build before striking a match.
“Can’t a woman gaze adoringly at the man she loves without there being some sort of thirsty ulterior motive?”
“If you weren’t the same woman who was making eyes at me while I was pumping gas or who wouldn’t stop grabbing my ass while I was loading the car this morning, maybe I’d give you the benefit of the doubt,” he laughs, adding another log to the fire.
You stick your tongue out at him before turning around to flip the burgers. “Sorry for appreciating having a partner who has the ability to take care of me.”
You squeal as he grabs you by your waist and spins you to face him. “Oh, I’ll take care of you alright,” he flirts, kissing all over your face and across your neck.
Your dinner is nice, the food is delicious and you enthusiastically fill him in on the hiking trail you selected for tomorrow. When you’re finished eating, you tend to the fire while Ash offers to clean up the trash and secure the rest of the food. He passes by you a few minutes later, headed for the left edge of your site, armed with his backpack, a stack of blankets and an excitedly determined look on his face.
“Two minutes,” he declares.
You watch curiously as he spreads a blanket on the ground and then another couple on top to layer, looking satisfied with his work before topping off the makeshift bed with an unzipped sleeping bag and two small pillows. He kicks off his shoes, sits down and cutely waves you over, patting the spot next to him.
“While you were sleeping earlier I did a survey of the campground and this is where the trees part the most for us to see the sky,” he explains, directing you to lay down on the pillow.
You settle into the place he made for you and gasp at the view. He’s right, the trees surrounding you seem to almost intentionally diverge to create a nearly unobscured view. Outside of the city, away from all the light pollution and smog, the night sky is a lush, velvety sea of black with patches of impossibly bright stars offering a gorgeous contrast. Not quite visible behind the trees but still unmistakable in presence, the moon casts a soft, romantic glow around you.
Somehow when you planned this trip, you didn’t consider how breathtaking this scenario would be and as you look back over at your boyfriend, bathed in moonlight, you feel instantly overwhelmed. You sit back up and lean over towards him. “It’s perfect,” you whisper, smiling into the soft kiss you press upon his lips.
Ashton hums into it, placing his hands on your cheeks, thumbs softly stroking your face as he kisses you. "One more thing and then it'll be perfect," he winks.
You give him an interested look as he moves away and you lay back on the blanket, staring up at the sky again while you wait for him to join you. You hear him rummaging around in his backpack and before you can ask him what he’s up to, you hear the soft pop of a container lid being lifted and the smell of weed fills the air.
“Ahhh, you read my mind,” you grin at him, propping yourself up on your elbows.
The breeze makes lighting the joint difficult at first and you cup your hands over his to help aid the task; Ash thanks you with a quick thigh squeeze as he takes his first hit and passes it to you. You take a puff, closing your eyes as you inhale, letting yourself fully appreciate the feeling of the cool air on your face and Ashton’s hand on your skin.
You hand the joint back to him and as he lifts it to his lips, he lays back and you follow suit, curling into his side, shifting so he can sling his arm around you. You lay there together, smoking and stargazing, only occasionally talking, mainly just enjoying being present with each other, something you’re realizing you don’t do often enough.
Ashton breaks the silence and quietly says, “I’m so glad we’re doing this, baby.” He squeezes his arm around you to emphasize his words. “Getting away for a few days is always great, but doing it like this? Just the two of us, alone in nature.... I can’t think of anything better. Thank you for putting it all together.”
You smile softly against him. “You’ve been talking about wanting to do this kind of thing forever, I thought it was time to make it happen for you.”
He leans in and gives you a sweet kiss and instead of pulling away when he’s done, he lets his lips linger on yours; he swipes his tongue across your bottom lip, you press small kisses against his mouth. The two of you forget about the stars, lazily playing like this, getting lost in the physicality of each other, in the endless wonders of being stoned and in love.
The next morning you wake up much earlier than usual but Ashton somehow still has you beat. You sleepily stumble out of the tent to find him already in the middle of cooking breakfast, using both the campfire and the stove to whip up some bacon and veggie omelettes for the two of you.
He offers you a bright “Mornin’ baby!” and opens his arms for you.
You step into his embrace and promptly bury your face in his chest, breathing deep and noting how his hoodie now has that distinct Ashton smell blended with the scent of the coffee he's drinking, last night’s campfire and a whiff of the weed you smoked. It’s a weirdly comforting aroma and you breathe it in again to commit it to memory.
“I’m supposed to be spoiling you, birthday boy, what are you doing up before me?” You complain with a smile. “Don’t get to treat you to breakfast, don’t get to wake you up with a surprise blowjob…”
He smirks, “Oh I’d be more than happy to let you finish up here while I take a quick nap. Y’know. To help get your plan back on track.”
You playfully push out of his hold and he easily wrestles you back into his arms. You kiss and cuddle until breakfast is ready; it’s a tasty but quick meal, neither of you wanting to dawdle too long so you can get an early start on your hike.
It's only a short drive down the mountain to the trail you’ve picked to explore. As you get your backpacks out of the car, you comment to Ash how this area once again seems to be devoid of other visitors and he shares that earlier when he popped into the general store for a fresh bag of ice, they mentioned their busiest weeks tend to be later in the summer.
“Besides, less people around means more excuses for me to do this,” he flirts, dipping you back into a frisky kiss, grabbing your ass while he’s at it.
His amorous mood continues as you begin the hike: holding your hand as you stroll the path, pulling you into his side every so often to kiss your forehead or cheek, asking you to lead the way under the guise of “setting the pace” but judging from the comments he makes, he clearly just wanted a better view of your ass in your tight shorts.
You reach your first stop and you both shrug your backpacks off; you snap a few photos of some ancient looking trees while Ash perches on a rock to sip some water and bask in the sun. His attention is quickly diverted when he notices you rubbing at your neck.
“What’s that all about?”
Halfway through the shrug you offer him, you grimace and that answers his question for you. “Think it’s a combo of not being used to that air mattress and wearing this pack,” you admit, rolling your head, trying to shake it out.
He pouts at you sympathetically and gestures for you to come over to him. “Well, we can definitely pad the bed with more blankets tonight,” he promises. Your neck and shoulders are already bare thanks to your thin-strapped tank and his large hands easily cover the area as he soothingly massages your ailing muscles, calloused fingers digging in deep to work out the knot you were troubled by. “And before we take off again, let’s transfer some of your shit to my backpack, mine’s light.”
You smile and sweetly say, “You always seem to know just what I need, babe.”
“I try my best,” he replies with a playful edge to his voice. “Think I’ve got an idea of somethin’ else you might need.” You giggle in surprise as you feel his lips suddenly work their way across your shoulders before attaching to your neck; his hands and mouth work in tandem, massaging and kissing all the skin they can find.
Ashton’s hands start to wander to your breasts but you grab them as you turn to face him. “We’ve still got a long ways to go, mister, can’t let you get yourself all worked up just yet,” you chide, eyes smiling.
He easily shakes off your grasp and returns his hands to your body, sliding them inside the back pockets of your shorts. “Hmm… that’s gonna be a tricky one then because you always have me all worked up,” he counters, eyebrows wiggling suggestively.
You bite your lip to hold back a grin as you allow him to pull you closer. With your noses touching, you quietly admit, “Ok, that was a pretty good comeback I have to give you credit for that.”
He quickly pecks your lips before smugly saying, “It wasn’t just a good comeback, it was a good point…” He picks at your clothes as he continues, “This skimpy little tank top, these tight little shorts… had me half hard since you came out of the tent this morning.” You give him an amusedly skeptical look and he takes your hand and places it on his crotch to prove his point.
You give him a light squeeze as you look at him mischievously. “Our first stop and you’ve already got my hand on your cock, you gonna make it through this, big guy?”
He leans in and just when you close your eyes thinking he’s going to kiss you, he simply grazes your bottom lip with his teeth, tugging it a little before pulling away. He rasps, “Are you?”
A chill washes over you as you watch Ashton stand up and cross over to where the backpacks are; you can’t help but stare, his ass looks downright delicious in those shorts and the striped button down he has on over his tank is already starting to soak through with sweat. He easily uses one hand to lift both bags onto a rock and you have to stop yourself from groaning at how hot it is. Instead, you collect yourself and walk over to help him.
Your willpower isn’t quite as strong during your next stop and it’s not long before you’re straddling Ash on a tree stump, his hands cradling your ass, encouraging you to slowly grind on the bulge in his shorts.
“We’ve got the whole goddamn forest to ourselves, baby… can be as loud for me as you want,” he purrs.
As if on cue, you let out a moan as you roll your hips and the seam of your shorts presses against your clit in just the right way. He grips you tighter to help you move again and you feel your wetness drip into your underwear as your clit catches on his stiff cock underneath you; you cry out again, grasping onto his now bare biceps.
"I'm all for fooling around out here, babe, but this is ridiculous," you pant, tapping his hands on you so he'll loosen his hold and you can get up.
"Was feeling like a ridiculously good idea to me, love," Ashton breathes, helping you steady yourself.
You quirk an eyebrow at him. "Do you really want to walk the rest of the trail and back with cum in your pants, dude?"
"Ok, well, no," he chuckles, adjusting himself. You laugh at his relentlessness when you feel him behind you suddenly, wrapping his arms around you, pressing his hardness into your ass. "Seems like our problem could be solved if I just fuck you right here, then."
You turn around, reassuring him of your interest with a hungry kiss before once again discouraging him. "Babe, we're not even halfway, if we fuck now, we're both gonna be exhausted and useless."
He narrows his eyes and you giggle because you know that means you've made a point he can't disagree with. He recovers quickly, that same suggestive glint in his eye. “So what I’m hearing is the further up the trail we get, the more likely it is we can do some celebrating?”
You grin at him. “Desperate enough to play the birthday card, are we?” He grunts when you yank him closer by pulling on the waistband of his shorts. You murmur in a low tone, “I said we shouldn’t fuck yet, I never said we couldn’t have a little fun along the way, birthday boy.” You let your hand brush over the front of his waning erection before you slink away.
As you take on the next stretch of the hike, the air is charged with this playfully erotic energy. You try your best to take in the gorgeous environment surrounding you but your attention is undeniably divided. You recognize nature’s beauty as you gaze up at the tall trees, warm breeze ghosting over your skin but then your eyes come back down and focus on Ashton, large and sturdy like a Sequoia, the memory of his touch still lingering on your body and being surrounded by him is all you can think about.
And that’s what drives you to wrap your arms around as much of him as you can when you hit the next rest area. You nuzzle against his strong back, appreciating the feeling of his muscles flexing underneath his tank.
He turns to you with a loving yet naughty grin but before he can get out any snarky comments, you’re pulling him down to your lips. He moans into your mouth as you deliver filthy kiss after filthy kiss, leaving him panting heavily as he pulls away.
“And here I was wondering if you were into this,” he teases, hands taking up residence on your ass once again.
“I’m always into this,” you laugh in disbelief, pushing yourself up to kiss just under his ear where he likes. “Was just being practical before is all.” You peck along his neck, dipping down to nibble at his collarbones, loving how you can feel his heart pounding as you move across his chest.
Ash smirks, “Had nothing to do with regaining control of the situation, I’m sure.” He raises his hands in mock surrender as you kiss your way back up to his lips.
“You like me bossy,” you assert with a knowing grin.
“You telling me I like when you’re bossy doesn’t really do much to disprove my point, baby,” he giggles.
His laughter fades into a deep groan as your hand slides from his chest down to his crotch. “And you being this hard for me doesn’t disprove mine.” You punctuate your teasing with a few light strokes through his shorts.
It seems he’s willing to let you have the last word for once because instead of firing off another comeback, suddenly his tongue is in your mouth and he’s picking you up to set you on the edge of the nearby picnic table. He stands between your legs and the two of you hungrily make out, every groan and grab from one of you daring the other to take things even further.
Ashton's hand inches slowly up your thigh until his fingers are finally dipping under the leg of your shorts. He pushes your panties to the side and slides his fingers through your folds, cursing when he feels how wet you are. “Aww, you poor thing,” he says, voice deep and coated with exaggerated pity. “Absolutely soaked. You’re in no shape to get through the rest of this hike now.” He teases your clit momentarily before easily sliding a finger inside you.
You let yourself give into the feeling, rocking your hips back and forth as he adds a second finger. “You… you’re one to talk,” you breathe, grabbing him through his shorts again. “What’s this? The compass that’s gonna lead us home?” You barely finish your joke before you have to choke back a moan.
He ignores your wisecrack, opting to taunt you instead. “Yeah? Miss me that much, baby? Even just my fingers filling you got you feeling this good?”
“Gotta say, wish it was something else,” you admit, pulling his cock out of his shorts, grinning when you see he’s already leaking for you. “Looks like you do too.” You swipe over his tip, gathering up all the precum you can before spreading it around as you begin to firmly stroke him.
“You’re not gonna let me get it in just yet though, are you?” Ash teases, laughing darkly at your defiant head shake. “Such a stubborn girl… didn’t wanna cum last night, don’t wanna fuck until the end of the trail. What am I gonna do with you?” His fingers curl inside you while his thumb rubs tight circles on your clit and you feel your stomach tighten in response.
Your hand speeds up on his length, smug satisfaction shooting through you when you see his eyes flutter, threatening to close out of pleasure. "Ideally, once we get where we're going, you'll bend me over and watch me take this cock over and over," you murmur, sneaking your other hand down to casually play with his balls. "Been a few days now, think I'll be able to take it all at once? Or will it just be too much and you’ll have to stop while I breathe and moan through the stretch? You know I love the stretch, babe.”
He grunts, thrusting into your hand. “Know you do, baby… always such a good girl taking it all, making it look so easy,” he praises you, sounding more strained by the second. “You feel pretty fuckin’ ready for me right now though, so…” He slowly pulls his fingers from you, giggling when he feels you clench down on them, trying to keep him from moving.
“Tease,” you playfully accuse, shaking your head as he makes a big show out of licking his fingers clean of you. You twist your hand on the upstroke, teasing over the head of his cock just how he likes and the resulting whine that escapes him leaves you feeling undeniably empty. “Speaking of someone feeling ready, you’re about ready to cum for me, aren’t you, birthday boy?”
“God, why does it sound so naughty when you call me that?” He mutters with a mischievous laugh, moaning as you pull that twist move again. “Fuck, baby… you’re not wrong… you’ve either gotta stop or get on your knees and open up.”
“I’ve got a better idea,” you say mysteriously, sliding off the table and onto the picnic bench. You tug the front of your tank top down and make sure that the tops of your breasts are peeking out over your sports bra. You look up at him expectantly, daring him to follow through.
Ashton lets out a guttural groan. “Dirty girl… always want me to make a mess of you, no matter where we are, huh?” He reaches out and gives one of your tits a good squeeze before loudly cursing and clutching onto your shoulder to brace himself.
You give a quiet “That’s right, baby, cum for me” as you stroke him and with a tired sigh of your name, his cock pulses in your hand. You groan at the feeling of hot cum shooting onto your neck and chest, his breathing getting heavier as each rope hits your skin. As you give a few final tugs to make sure he’s given you all he has, he’s practically gasping for air.
You wait for him to open his eyes and then you play up the spectacle, dragging through the stray drops that made it above your collarbones and sucking your finger into your mouth, pushing your tits together, making sure he can see the way his cum is already starting to mix with your sweat and drip over your cleavage.
“How’s that for a mess?” You tease, looking up at him with lusty pride.
He lets out a long exhale. “Fuckin' beautiful, baby,” he chuckles, reaching down to lovingly cup your face. He looks you up and down and whistles. “Actually… how would you feel ---”
“Was part of the reason why I wanted it this way,” you cut him off, knowing what he’s asking for. “Go for it, birthday boy.”
Ash smirks at the nickname and picks his phone up off the table, snapping a few quick photos of you, your defiled appearance against the idyllic green landscape a twisted sight to behold.
He bends down to peck your lips in thanks and you grin at him as you pull away to look through your bag for the wet wipes to clean yourself up with. You’re surprised when Ashton’s hand gently grips the top of your bag to get your attention and you look up curiously.
“What if you… left it?”
“Left it,” you repeat slowly.
He continues, somehow both confident and shy in his suggestion. “Yeah… I mean, we don’t have much further to go… and I dunno, seeing you covered in my cum is something I always love but seeing you like this out here?” He gives a shiver to demonstrate his point. “It’s really doin’ something for me.”
You consider his request for a beat and then shrug nonchalantly. “If I get a cum splotch shaped tan on my chest, you’re gonna get asked to do something weiiiiird for me in return when we get home.”
He grins brightly and helps you get your backpack on. He places both of his hands on your face, planting a deep kiss on you. “You look so fuckin’ hot like this, baby,” he rasps.
As you walk the final patch of the trail, you swear you can feel Ashton’s desire for you radiating from him; his eyes seem to never stray too far from your body and his hands continually find their way to you as well. If you hadn’t been wearing the evidence of his recent orgasm on your chest, you would’ve sworn he’d been neglected for weeks.
“Planned a whole goddamn camping trip, didn’t realize all I had to do was wander around with cum on my tits for you to have the best birthday ever,” you tease, dropping your pack to strike a mockingly coy pose for the picture you catch him taking.
He cackles before coming up behind you, his voice deep and taunting in your ear. “I think you love it too, love seeing the hold you have on me, love knowing you can affect me like this,” he asserts, rubbing his stirring cock against your ass. His hand grips your neck, holding you by your throat as he continues. “And I know you love getting marked by me… beg for it sometimes, don’t you? Anything I can do that feels like claiming you for me and only me, isn’t that right, baby?”
He bites at your earlobe, kissing along your neck while his hands move to massage your breasts, careful not to disturb the mess. A whimper escapes you as he pushes you out of his arms but you break into a grin at the sight of him wordlessly following behind you as if he’s entranced by your presence.
You finally arrive at your destination and you take advantage of being a few steps ahead of your boyfriend, taking time to stretch from your journey. You extend your arms up above your head and you’ve just let them drop down as you bend at the waist, when you hear Ash’s pack hit the ground and a smirking “What a good girl, already in position.”
You turn to snark back at him but his mouth is on yours before you get the chance. For a minute, it’s a ravenous jumble of lips and tongues and hands. Finally, you break away and start to reach for the blanket roll on top of your backpack.
“Bend over.”
A thrill shoots through you when you hear the tone of his voice. “Right here?” You ask innocently, hoping your faux hesitance will set him off.
Sure enough, Ashton’s jaw tightens and he grabs your wrist, spinning you around to face away from him. “Don’t be cute, baby,” he huffs, nipping at your neck. “You said you wanted bent over so bend the fuck over.” He nudges your back with a slight pressure.
You sigh with satisfaction as you lean yourself forward, bending your knees and placing your hands on them for support. Again, as you’d hoped, a sharp smack immediately falls across your backside and you moan much louder than you expect. Ash lets out a dark chuckle while he roughly tugs down your shorts and panties and tosses them on your bag, discarding his own tank while he's at it.
“So wet I can smell you… so desperate for me you’re moaning before I’ve even touched you,” he scolds, kicking your feet apart further. “Good thing we’re alone in this forest, baby, this is really no way to act.”
You moan again in anticipation, feeling your legs actually shake at the sound of his shorts rustling behind you. “Fuck, babe… I just need you so bad, I can’t help it,” you whine as he runs himself through your folds. “Please… give me your cock, birthday boy.”
There’s a slap to the side of your thigh for teasing him with that name again but it barely registers because then he’s pushing inside you and you’re both groaning at how unbelievable it feels after all the wait. That stretch you were looking for is unmistakably, deliciously there but he's still able to glide in easily until he’s buried in you; it feels glorious to be full of him once again.
“That’s my girl,” Ashton breathes, giving a few test pumps before grabbing your hips so he can pick up the pace. “God, you always take it so goddamn well, always feel like such a perfect fit for me. Perfect pussy for my perfect girl.”
You rock back against him, eager for more of his thick length as soon as he thrusts it away from you. “Fill me so good, Ash, never been so full, never loved it this much,” you ramble, crying out when you arch your back and it makes him hit exactly where you need. “Jesus, why did I make us wait so long, it feels so fucking good, Ash. Fuck me, fuck me.”
He hums appreciatively and hits his hips into you harder, loving how vocal you’re being; your sounds increase as you let your hand slip between your legs to play with yourself. The tranquil sounds of your surroundings - the chirping birds, the soft rush of a small waterfall, the stirring of the trees in the wind - are in stark juxtaposition to your frantic cries or the pronounced skin-slapping of your coupling.
Ash tugs at your shirt. “Can we get your tits out, baby? Want more of you,” he pants. You hastily yank your top off and pull your bra down, letting your breasts spill out over the top. His hands are all over them immediately, squeezing them and rolling your nipples before finally rubbing over where he came on you earlier, his release now either dried or spread around your skin via sweat. “Such a good girl for me, you know that? Always so happy to give me what I want… what do you want, baby? What can I do for you?”
His praise overwhelms you in such a way that before you can respond, you have to stop and rub your clit even harder. Finally you moan, “Just wanna cum. Wanna cum all over your cock.”
He gives a surprisingly sweet kiss to your shoulder and then he roughly wraps a hand around each of your tits, using them for leverage to start power fucking you. His cock drives in and out of you harder and faster than you think you’ve ever felt and as his fingers start paying attention to your nipples again, you feel that ache in your core begin to spread.
The feeling is so overdue and so intense, you keep your voice low and restrained, almost as if you’re afraid to disrupt it. Unsurprisingly, that won’t do for Ashton and without missing a beat, he spanks your ass, knowing it’ll get you there quicker and provoke a reaction from you.
The high-pitched sob of his name you manage to choke out gets a smile out of him and he praises you again. “That’s right, baby… let me know how good it feels… let me know whose cock you wanted to cum on so badly… let me know who you belong to.”
You moan “Ash… Ash… ASH” over and over until it sounds like nonsense in your mind and you screw your eyes shut so hard you see stars as your orgasm claims you, your pussy tightening and squeezing around him with such strength you’re shocked he’s still able to thrust inside you. The warm waves of pleasure you’d been denying yourself are more than worth the wait and even as you start to settle, your body keeps shaking from the aftershocks.
“Yes, baby, yes,” he coos, nearing his end. “So tight, so good… fuckin’ perfect… just for me...” His rambling trails off into a pair of relieved groans as his hips stutter and he pumps you full of cum. He folds himself into you, resting on top of your bent body while he takes several deep breaths. After a moment and a small peck to your back, he straightens up and carefully pulls out of you.
Dazed, you’ve just managed to straighten yourself up when all of a sudden Ashton is on his knees in front of you, lifting your leg up over his shoulder and burying his face in your pussy. You whimper first at the contact of his tongue to your sensitive skin and then again at the realization of what he’s doing.
He eagerly laps up the cum dripping from you, groaning at the way your tastes blend together. His tongue tentatively pushes against your entrance, in search of more; the skilled way it wiggles and writhes against you has you moaning again and you desperately try to keep your hips from rolling over his face.
Ash feels you struggling and pulls back to check in. “Again?”
“Mmm-hmm,” you frantically reply, holding back a scream as he focuses his tongue on your clit this time, determined to make you cum again. He sucks it between his lips, tenderly swiping his tongue across, kissing your pussy as passionately as he kissed you earlier. One, two more kisses is all it takes and you’re gasping his name once again. His groans are muffled against you while his hands firmly grip your waist to steady you as you ride out your second orgasm.
You gently tug on his curls when it becomes too much; as if his lips and his tongue weren't enough, you didn't realize how much stubble he'd grown from not shaving the past couple days and the sting on your skin is welcome but a lot to handle in your current state.
His tongue runs through your folds a final time and then he's pressing soft kisses to your leg as he carefully brings it down off his shoulder. "Did so good, baby," he says in a reassuring voice, standing up to give you a single tender kiss. "Give me one second."
Ashton always moves quickly when he shifts into aftercare mode, eager to make you as comfortable as possible as soon as he possibly can. He passes you your water bottle to sip while he picks a shady spot to spread the blanket out, bunching up both of your discarded overshirts for you to use as a makeshift pillow. He's back by your side a moment later, taking your hand to guide you over and helping you lay down. Before you get the chance to thank him, he's already got the wipes and tissues in hand, diligently cleaning you up.
You reach out to caress his face when he comes closer, finally wiping up what's left on your chest from earlier. "You're sweet," you murmur. You almost feel silly saying it, your feelings for him are so vast and complex in this moment but it's all you can manage being a little love drunk and fairly exhausted from your two orgasms. He grins and squeezes your hand, kissing your palm before tucking your breasts back into your bra and helping you pull your bottoms back on.
He lays behind you, wrapping his arms around you and breathing a soft sigh of your name against your hair. The two of you lay in loving silence, basking in the contrast between the cool breeze blowing across your skin and the warmth of your lover's body on you.
Ash is such a large presence, literally and figuratively, you love the firmness and safety of being enveloped by him. But after a few minutes, you find yourself needing more and you turn over to face him. His eyes are closed and you stop to study him, taking in every detail: how long his lashes are, how much you love the shape of his nose, how structured but soft his cheeks are, how kissable his lips always seem to look, how his sharp jawline still makes your stomach drop after all this time.
You notice the dimples that you love so much starting to form as he smiles at the feel of your stare. He opens his eyes and with a single look, he's able to read your energy and know exactly what you're needing. He fits his hand under your jaw and slowly kisses you, letting you lead the way, inviting your tongue to take and taste all you need from him.
He waits for you to be the one to break the kiss and then he's gently pushing you onto your back so he can lay his head on your chest. You stroke your fingers through his hair while he uses his to trace designs on your bare stomach.
"I don't know that I've ever been more grateful to be sharing a moment with someone," Ashton says quietly, the thought still formulating in his mind. You look down to see his hazel eyes gazing fondly at you. "I'm glad it's with you."
You get yourself up early the next morning to ready the surprise you’d been planning for him and as you lay there, waiting for your eyes to adjust to the darkness, you replay those words over in your mind. You think about the concept of being grateful not only to experience a moment but to have the opportunity to share it with someone and how fortunate you are to share your moments with him.
Moments like yesterday when you and Ash veered off the trail to find that waterfall you’d been hearing all afternoon and how peaceful you felt as you stood there watching it, splitting a joint with him. The way he laid across your stomach when you smoked again that evening, how he kept giggling at himself every time he started to doze off once it got late. The way when you finally made it to the tent to sleep, he immediately pulled you across the air mattress and held you to his chest, murmuring a tired thanks for giving him such a special day.
You close your eyes and burrow into him one last time before carefully slipping out of his arms to start your preparations; your teeth instantly start chattering, the biting morning air especially unforgiving coming directly out of Ashton’s warm embrace. You throw a jacket over the hoodie you wore to bed and toss a hand warmer in each pocket before you slide your shoes on and get to work.
You impress yourself with how quickly you do what’s needed and you return to the tent, eager to reveal your plan. You stroke your hand through your boyfriend’s messy curls, quietly saying his name. You smile at the way he refuses to budge, the years of sneaking in naps on tour have taught him to sleep through anything.
You kneel over the mattress to softly kiss his cheeks, lilting, “Wake up, birthday boy… got somethin’ to show you.” You kiss his cheeks again.
Ash stirs, scrunching up his face dramatically. “Your nose is fuckin’ cold,” he complains. He opens his eyes to see the still dark sky through the mesh sun roof and his eyes dart to you, confused. “Everything ok, baby?”
You squeeze his arm excitedly. “Everything’s great… I have a surprise for you,” you say proudly.
“You do?” He smiles, reaching for you sleepily. “Does it involve getting back under the covers with me and sleeping for a few more hours before you unveil it?”
You poke his side. “Can you just indulge me? I promise you won’t be disappointed.”
You crawl out of the tent and within a few minutes Ashton follows, bundled up in a hoodie, jacket and beanie. He spots you leaning against the running car and jogs over to you.
"What're you up to?" He asks teasingly, clasping your hands inside your jacket pockets.
You smile at him demurely. "You'll see," you promise. "Hop in, the heater's on and there's a thermos of hot coffee inside."
He sleepily hums, nipping at your nose before he pulls away. "Mmm, my love language."
It's your first time maneuvering the truck up the mountain and there's even more of a literal learning curve given how dark it is. In your mind, you're more excited than anything else but Ash picks up on your nervous energy and keeps a steadying hand on your knee during the entire ride.
You pull off the main road and drive down a small path that leads to an open field, sparsely populated by trees, where you put the car in park.
"The fact that I'm having zero fight or flight response to this ominous scenario just shows how much I trust you," Ash cracks.
You snort at his comment as you get out of the car. "Come along," you instruct. "Ignore the shovel behind that rock over there, totally coincidental." He cackles at your joke and follows you around the car where you’ve opened the back and set up a lantern to illuminate the dark interior of the camper shell.
He peers inside to see the truck bed is empty save for the camping stove, mini cooler and a bunch of blankets and pillows you’ve spread out. “What’s all this for?” He grins as he climbs inside.
You laugh at how quickly he makes himself at home, tossing his shoes outside and shimmying under a blanket. “I read about this spot in the reviews when I booked the campsite, said it was the perfect place to watch the sunrise,” you boast. “Figured we were gonna have to clear the truck out to pack everything up today anyways so I gave us a headstart and we get to be cozy for this.”
You crawl inside and Ashton is immediately at your side. “Thank you, baby,” he murmurs, voice scratchy with sleep and perhaps a bit of emotion. He takes your face in his hands and kisses you sweetly.
You beam at him. “I brought the stove and stuff for more coffee because I assume you’ve already devoured that thermos I gave you.” He shrugs guiltily and you laugh. “I also brought some protein bars because some of us don’t have a steel stomach like you do.”
“Ha ha,” he says dryly before lunging for you, covering your face in exaggerated wet kisses. “You just thought of everything, didn’t you, my love?”
He giggles at your muffled answer and then the two of you busy yourselves arranging the bedding for maximum comfort and viewing position. The darkness has already grown notably softer since you pulled off the road and the first hints of sunlight should be appearing soon.
You lay together with your heads facing the open air, happy to chat and snuggle under the covers while you wait for the show to begin. You set up the Bluetooth speaker you brought and start the playlist you made and downloaded for this excursion. Ash immediately recognizes the opening notes of “Here Comes The Sun” and lets out a delighted chuckle.
“Baby! That’s so fuckin’ cheesy,” he laughs, tickling your side.
You playfully bat away his hands. “I had to,” you shrug.
“Cornball move, love.”
“That’s why I knew you’d like it,” you tease.
He huffs as if he’s offended but pulls you in close, pressing a kiss to your forehead before trying to wrestle your phone away from you so he can investigate the rest of your playlist.
You both settle and fall silent as the sky starts to brighten, pastel purples and then pinks beginning to paint the horizon. You stay cuddled in the blankets, oohing and aahing at the colors changing until the tiniest orange ball of light peers out from behind the hills. You sit up to get a better view and Ashton lays his head in your lap. You play with his hair while he waxes poetic about a sunrise symbolizing rebirth and how fitting it is that he gets to celebrate another year of life like this.
The sun continues its upward journey, now proudly sitting just above the mountains surrounding you. Ashton encourages you to go out into the field so he can take some pictures of you against this magnificent backdrop; you protest, given your sloppy morning attire but his enthusiasm wins you over like it always does. After allowing him a few snaps, you insist he join you so you can photograph him as well. By the time you start taking smooching selfies, the entire field is bathed in a dreamy golden and pink glow.
You make it back to the car first and start rearranging the pillows to be at the other end of the bed to keep the now prominent sunlight out of your eyes. Ash climbs in and dramatically starfishes across the bed, enduring multiple pokes and prods from you before he moves, allowing you both to get back under the blankets.
You lay with your back to his chest and the two of you take turns showing off the photos you each just took. Then your phones get put away and you relax against him, silently encouraging him to spoon you while you vibe out to your playlist.
He squeezes his arms around you tight. “This is exactly the kind of thing I was imagining all those times I mentioned wanting to camp with you,” he tells you. “You thinking of it on your own makes it so much more special though, I like knowing we’re on the same wavelength.”
“It happens on occasion,” you grin, tilting your face up to kiss his chin.
You peck at his jaw a few more times before you turn around in his arms so you can kiss him properly. It’s a simple kiss, one where your mouth just lightly brushes his, but it’s enough to get him humming against you, bringing his hand up to hold your face so you don’t go anywhere. His thumb strokes your cheek as he slowly glides his lips over yours and his tongue soon follows suit, slowly tracing your lips until they part for him. The kiss doesn’t deepen, your tongues just lazily tangle and untangle for a while. He smells like fire and tastes like coffee and you’re so taken by his presence that you grip his bicep to keep him in place when he starts to pull back.
It continues on, the two of you laying together, lost in this seemingly endless push and pull, neither wanting the other to stray too far from your lips. The vibe stays relaxed and unrushed but the kisses do eventually become needier, deeper and more exploratory, spreading to necks, ears and any other patches of skin you both have exposed. Hands also begin to wander and it doesn’t take long for your leg to end up hooked around Ashton’s waist, with him pawing at your ass and you slowly moving your hips against him.
You lift your leg higher, trying to get him closer and when you feel how hard he’s gotten, you can’t help the moan that pours from your mouth. “Need me?” You ask simply, reaching down to stroke him through his sweatpants. You sigh a simple admission before he gets the chance to answer. “I need you.”
He groans at both your words and your touch. “Yeah,” he breathes, slipping his hand up your sweatshirt to cup your breast. “Want you too.”
You capture his lips in the most passionate kiss of the morning so far. “Then have me, birthday boy,” you flirt.
He presses his hips into you. “I’m really gonna miss you calling me that,” he laughs.
“Me too,” you giggle.
It takes another few minutes to get situated as you continue to laugh and kiss while debating how naked to get considering the chilly weather. Ash opts to strip off his outerwear, leaving him in a plain white t-shirt with his sweatpants pulled down just enough to get his cock out. You end up in just the henley of his you wore to bed, unbuttoned nearly all the way to give him access to your chest.
You’re back on your sides and he brings your leg up on his hip once again; he guides his cock between your folds, inviting you to rock against it, coating him in your wetness. Even though the teasing was his idea, he doesn’t seem to have much patience for it, almost immediately groaning your name and stilling your hips so he can slip inside you. He brings you into a sensual kiss, tongue teasing over yours, teeth nipping at your lips while he takes his time filling you, wanting to savor every second of burying himself in your pussy.
Tiny whimpers and gasps escape your throat with every inch he gives you; you love when he goes slow like this, everything fades away except for the awed, hungry look in his eyes as you take every bit of him. Nothing else matters except for how unbelievably hard he feels, how wet you are and that heavy, full feeling growing between your legs as he pushes in further.
After what feels like a gloriously torturous eternity, Ashton finally bottoms out and he leans his forehead against yours, letting you both catch your breath and focus on the feeling of being connected in this way. “Made for me,” he murmurs, almost to himself, caught up in appreciating how tightly you wrap around his cock as he starts pumping into you slowly.
Your fingers stroke over his scruffy cheek, holding his face to yours but not quite having the focus to kiss him. Your bodies rock and sway against each other, too busy enjoying being close to find a rhythm just yet. It’s such a strangely wonderful experience to indulge the quieter aspects of your desire like this - you want more of him, all of him, but you’re in no hurry to get there. Having him near, feeling him all over you like this is more than enough for now.
Your eyes meet and neither of you can keep from smiling. You bury your face in his neck, breathing in his scent, committing this moment and this feeling to memory. “Love you,” you sigh against his skin.
You’ve both said it before but it doesn’t happen often. He squeezes your hand and you know it’s his quiet way of acknowledging how intensely you must be feeling. “Love you so much, baby.”
His lips find yours again and he begins to move more steadily in you, finding a pace. Like with everything else, his hips are unhurried and easy; you close your eyes and get lost in the sensations he’s giving you, letting yourself be present with him in this moment instead of focusing on the urge to rush towards the end. You want this to last forever.
Ash fits an ass cheek in one of his large hands and starts moving you on his cock, paying close attention to how your breathing changes with this new technique. You shift your leg higher and he hits a spot that elicits the loudest moan you’ve given him today. He instantly decides he needs to hear it again and he rocks into you with a little more force, a little more intention.
“Sound so pretty, love… wanna hear more,” he says, breathing noticeably faster. He attaches his mouth to the spot on your neck that always gets you noisy and within seconds you’re whining for him. He gives it one last nibble and reassures you, “I’m here, baby, tell me what you need.”
You breathe deep, trying to find the words for how you’re feeling. You settle on, “More… just… more.” You grab onto his neck, then his arm, then his back. Anything to try and get him closer, anything to show him you need him closer. You quietly admit, “Always want more.” It sounds so desperate you’d be embarrassed if it wasn’t completely true.
His hands cradle your face and he kisses you tenderly. “I know, baby… I know,” he soothes. He pulls out and your disappointed groan gets muffled with another kiss. He sits up, quickly shedding the remaining clothes on both of your bodies, wasting no time getting his mouth on your tits. After he’s satisfied with the marks he’s left on you and the moans you’ve given him in return, he pulls you up into his lap to straddle him. He buries his face in your chest once again, wrapping his arms around you and bending his knees a bit so that you’re completely surrounded by him.
You thread your fingers in his hair, holding him against you for as long as he’ll allow. He finally raises his head back up, pecking first your throat, then your lips. “Better?” He asks, rubbing your back.
You reach between your bodies and grip his cock, still slick from you; you glide your hand over his wet length, making sure your thumb dabs at the resulting precum you coax out. You tap your thumb along his bottom lip, leaving a trail of precum that you proceed to kiss off, tongue darting to find his, ensuring he gets a taste.
“Mmm,” he hums, licking his lips for more. He laughs, “Doesn’t answer my question though, baby.”
You grin, playfully flicking his shoulder. “Well let’s see then,” you smirk, lifting up and sinking down on his cock, moaning softly until you’ve totally engulfed him. You clench around him and he inhales sharply, hands flying to your hips, fingers digging in until your muscles relax. You look him in the eyes hungrily and sigh, “Much better.”
Ashton’s naughty chuckle turns into a needy groan as you start moving in his lap; you grab his neck and arch your back, letting his arms hold you as you work yourself over him. His hands wander from your back down to your ass and back up again, his mouth eager to pay attention to any skin it can reach. You circle your hips, something that always makes him crazy and sure enough, he’s muttering a strained “Goddammit, fuck, baby...” before you know it.
You slide a hand between your legs and tease your clit, the warmth you feel from being in his presence starting to blend with the warmth spreading through you from being on him. Not only does he fill you better than anyone ever has, no one’s ever made you feel so cared for, so safe to explore, so fulfilled physically and emotionally. You’re not sure how to put that into words when you’re this close to climax so you just kiss him and whimper, “So, so full, Ash. So good.”
He knows that sound means you’re almost there and when he feels you slow down, he holds onto your hips and helps you keep going, gently moving you up and down his cock. “Come on, baby,” he encourages, biting his lip to keep in control as he watches your tits bounce in front of his face. “Know it feels good… for me too… gonna squeeze me so tight, aren’t you, baby?”
“Fuck,” you whisper sharply, your orgasm approaching much faster than you anticipated. One hand on your clit, the other pulling at his hair, you start to lose it as he bounces you faster on his cock. “Yes, Ash… babe… oh god I’m ---”
Your orgasm hits you so fast you expect to scream but the first wave wrecks you so much, it knocks the breath from your lungs and you don’t find your voice until it’s almost over. Your pussy pulses and grips him with such intensity, it sends him over the edge as well and he throatily rushes out your name as he jerks against you, his cum spilling into you.
You tuck your head into his neck, hugging your arms around him, wanting to keep him close while you both come down. His arms stay wrapped at your waist, his fingers mindlessly stroking over your skin as he holds you tight.
“Such a perfect way to end this whole adventure, my love” he finally says, breathing still a little labored. “Thank you for doing all this, baby, I mean it.”
You lift your head and the soft smiles you exchange feel just as intimate as the experience you just shared. “I’m so glad you had a good time, Ash, you deserve it. More than anyone I know.” He grins proudly at you and you press a kiss to each of his dimples to emphasize your point. You sigh and lament, “We should probably get cleaned up and head back, babe. Gotta hit the road soon.”
You start to lift off of him but he grabs your hips, halting you. “Can we wait a minute?” He squeezes around your waist, letting his hands explore your skin. “I just… kinda wanna stay immersed in you like this until I actually can’t anymore.”
You pout at him, touched by how sweetly erotic his request is, how perfectly it captures the tone of this whole trip. You embrace him again, leaning in until your face is inches from his.
“Anything for you, birthday boy."
————- @whoyougonnafind @cxddlyash @2fangirl4u @cashtonasfuck @talkfastromance4 @itjustkindahappenedreally @saywhatnow07 @mymindwide @suchalonelysunflower @pxrxmoore @findingliam-o @fedorable-killjoys @trix-arent-for-kids @olivia-foster-irwin @saphseoul @calmsweetcreature @onthecliffside-mgc @feliznavidaddycal @himbohood @maggiesupertramp @wiiildflowerrr @karajaynetoday @ashtonangst @sunshineeashton @aladyofalbion @youngblood199456 @xsongbirdx @loveroflrh @fairytrice @calumrose @irwindoll @polycashton @in-superbloom
#5sos smut#ashton irwin smut#ashton smut#5 seconds of summer smut#kindahoping4forever#smut#kh4f fic#to love him is to need him everywhere#i'd already had this title as an option & then the next day Ash spotify shared the song it's from lmao so I basically had to go with it#I am so glad not only to be posting again but that this fic is finally done lmao#i don't know how it got this ridiculously long (or sweet tbh) but I think I'm happy with how it turned out and hopefully you enjoy as well#please let me know lmao#it's a bit different for me (i think?) so feedback would be great!#and great news: i have one other (shorter don't worry lol) piece finished and ready to post so hopefully it won't be another month#and i'm making good headway on the other projects i've been hinting around so#exciting things are in store
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