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#and i won't have to clean up after him at 6 in the morning
neonpigeons · 2 years
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noodle is almost perfectly potty trained. the problems arise when certain things stress him out... like rain lol. most of his life didn't have rain in it (he was born in spring during an extreme drought, after all) and while he does like playing in water, raindrops hitting his face are unacceptable. usually I just open the back door and he goes and does his business but now gotta be his escort to the backyard and give him lots of encouragement lol
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imwritingthefout · 2 months
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after session hangout
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basically you fall in love with the dm of your campaign in college: Ford pines, smut ensues
This is crossposted to ao3 so if you wanna go read it there, here’s the link:
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Waking up each day to the same old ceiling was starting to bore you. 
Ever since moving out of your parents house for college you felt like a stranger in the dorm you now called ‘home’, and It didn't help that you refused to decorate it. 
Getting out of your plain old bed, you stand up and push away the blinds with a tug, the light from the early morning sun blinding you temporarily. You glance down at your clock; 6:30am, thursday. The time isn't the part that excites you though, it's the day. Today is the day you look forward to all week: Dd&md day! 
You go to get ready for your morning class, excited for what the future of today may hold. You love dd&md, its been your favourite game since you were a child -even though you had no one to play it with back then, you got creative (no goat was harmed in your past attempts at playing the game).
Your classes went by in a blur. Of course you were taking notes and whatnot, it was important to pay attention! But in secret, you were drawing your character all over the side of your notebook and thinking of strategies on how to defeat the next dungeon your dm set up for you.
And then there was your dm. 
One of the many reasons you adored thursdays was because you got to play dd&md of course, but other than that there was another big reason you liked thursdays.
To put it plainly: your dm, Stanford Pines was Hot. like, capital H Hot. you couldn't get over his warm brown eyes that sparkled with passion whenever he detailed the characters he was playing. His hands that moved with his every word, adding to the description of the imaginary world he was building. God you wanted to feel those hands on you. What would they feel like, intertwined with your own, on your hips while he-
You decided to stop that train of thought. As much as you liked him, you also respected him enough to know that he would probably never feel that way towards you, and you shouldn't fantasise about him like that (even though it was hard not to).
And though he was Hot, that wasn't the only reason you liked him. You liked him because he was smart, compassionate, funny and so very cute.
What can you say? You had a thing for nerds.
As your last class of the day finished finished up, you quickly packed up your things and rushed to the old building next to the dorms that housed your favourite room in the whole campus: the old meeting room you guys used to house your dd&md sessions! 
The room wasn't glorious, it was just an old meeting room that's been out of use for years. But to you, that room was the home of your imagination. It held a special place in your heart, and you were sure it was the same for the rest of your party.
Speaking of which, you saw Fiddleford approach you down the old hallway, little puffs of dust kicking up with each of his steps. “Hey Fidds! You ready for today’s session?” you yelled to him slightly as he approached. “Ready as I'll ever be! You won't believe what I have planned in order to kick that sorcerer's butt!” he gave your shoulder a weak punch and opened the door with his key.
Usually, the old building was out of commission. But since Fiddleford knew a guy who works as campus security and convinced him to give him the key, you had full access to the building to do whatever you pleased. Of course for you, anything just means playing dd&md, not causing a mess and cleaning up after yourselves as much as possible in order to not inconvenience anyone. You knew that other people your age would throw huge parties and wreck the place, but you weren't that kind of person, really. You just liked having a quiet place to play your games and hang out with your friends. Fiddleford was like that too, that's how he got the key in the first place; because his friend trusted him not to mess up the place.
As you walked inside, you saw the table set out just how you guys left it last week: the long rectangular table set up in the middle of the room, with seven chairs set out all around the table, one for each player and one for your dm. A whiteboard behind the dm’s seat that shows the map of the fantasy world you are currently in the middle of exploring, and cork board on another wall with a bunch of graph paper pinned to it.
You walk around the table, taking your regular seat across from Fiddleford. “So what do you think Ford's planning for this session?” you ask Fidds. This is your usual routine: get to the building early, wait for Fidds and ask him if he has any intel for the session since his roommate is Ford. “like usual, i can’t tell you, it'll ruin the fun!” Fidds exclaimed, although the grin on his face told you he likes this familiar back and forth. 
You eased into a casual conversation from there, talking about your days as you waited for everyone else. You liked coming early because then you had more time to talk with Fidds and, of course, with Ford.
You met Fidds on the first day of the semester, when you sat next to each other in the freshman orientation presentation, and hit it off from there. you became friends rather quickly, bonding over the fact that you were both far away from home with no friends in town. You decided to help him move into his dorm after the presentation, and that's when you met Ford.
At first, you were a bit speechless at the guy in front of you. His outfit was the usual scholar's outfit of a white button up shirt with a brown vest on top, but then he was wearing jeans in order to look more ‘casual’ as he put it. His hair was neat and tidy and his glasses framed his face perfectly, at least in your opinion. You introduced yourself awkwardly, and once he introduced himself as Stanford Pines, a parapsychology major with aspirations for 12 phd’s in the next five years, you knew you were in over your head. You can't have a crush on a super-genius! What if he turns out to be an arrogant asshole? But you couldn't help developing feelings for him as you got closer. He wasn't just a super-genius, he was also kind and compassionate, understanding and just a good friend. That's when you decided to just stay friends with Ford, you couldn't afford to lose such a good friend.
Speaking of which, the man himself comes into the room, holding a stack of books detailing the rules and monsters of dd&md, a satin sack full of dice and his dm screen. You can barely see his face behind all of the things he's carrying, and immediately you jump up to help him carry everything. He silently thanks you for the help and starts setting his stuff up while you go back to your seat. “Hey guys, how've you been since last week?” Ford asks you two. “Oh i've been well, you know. Dealing with you every day can be challenging but I manage somehow” Fidds says dramatically and you stifle a giggle. Ford gives Fidds a death glare before turning to you “and how are you?” he asks with a smile that makes your knees weak. “I'm good!” you proclaim a little too loudly and cough to hide your blush “yes i'm good, just the usual classes and such” you say in a normal voice (or at least what you hope is a normal voice, it doesn't help that Fidds looks at you cheekily, already knowing your secret crush on his roomate) “how have you been?” you ask him. 
“Just the usual: doing homework, studying and building up today’s session” you catch on to the last part as a potential way to continue the conversation. “Well, what do you have planned for today?”. “Oh come on now, it wouldn't be fun to just spoil the game for you, would it?” he says and points to you to emphasise his point. “You can't even give us an outline? Something?” you pout a little and Ford gives in “fine… I may have something up my sleeve for today, and I can guarantee you won't see it coming this time! That's all I'm going to say for now though” he jabs his finger at you, trying to seem angry that you caught onto his plans last time, but his little smile gives him away. 
Soon your other party members start filing in and you all start the session. 
It goes as usual, you all mess around for a bit before getting serious. You can confidently say you saw the twist Ford put in this session coming, it was obvious how the wizard was actually a party member’s son, they had so many similarities! After another successful session, everyone leaves for their respective houses, leaving you, Fidds and Ford alone in the room to clean up.
“I can't believe you saw that coming again! I swear you're like a sorcerer in real life” Ford chuckles and Fidds adds “that would also explain how you get here before me every time! I swear I ran to get here today and you still beat me here!” “well what can i say guys? I'm just magical in every way!” you strike a silly but confident pose as Ford and Fidds laugh at your antics. “Oh shoot! I promised my friend i’d go on a blind date today, could you guys lock up this time? Ford you can just give me the keys tomorrow morning if i get lucky” Fidds winks and Ford rolls his eyes “alright, we get it, you can go”. Fidds leaves the keys on the desk and almost sprints out of the room.
You and Ford clean up the mess on the desk in silence before Ford decides to break it “how do you keep predicting my twists anyways? I swear it was supposed to come out of nowhere but you're too smart” you blush a little at the compliment “thank you, i guess i’m just good at guessing twists. But you do make it kind of easy. I mean, a secret relative of someone close? It’s kind of a cliche don't you think?” he pulls at the collar of his button up shirt and you can immediately tell something is wrong.
“Yeah.. I guess it is kind of cliche, but it's what fits the character, don't you think?” he says with a guilty tone. “Ford, what's wrong? I feel like you're hiding something” you get close enough to put a reassuring hand on his shoulder “you can tell me anything, i wont judge” you add, trying to coax him into telling you what's wrong.
“Well… I guess I brought the secret relative from my own life because… well… I have a twin brother….” the sentence doesn’t completely shock you, but it is still somewhat of a surprise “why do you never mention him? Did something happen between you two?” he chuckles a bit before saying “still as perceptive as ever, huh?” you blush a bit as he continues, looking out into the middle distance in thought
“Me and my brother were really close when we were young, we would do everything together. But as time went on, we grew apart. He didn't like the fact that I wanted to go away to a fancy college, especially because he knew he couldn't follow me there. I was working on a machine to impress the college, but on the day of the showing it stopped working. My own brother sabotaged my future. We had a big falling out over it and that’s why I'm here instead….” you empathised with Ford, but you couldn't help but question some things about his story.
“I know it must have been hard to deal with the fact you lost your ticket to the college of your dreams, but do you really believe your brother would sabotage you? If he loves you, wouldn't he want to support you? Maybe it was an accident and he didn't mean to destroy your project?” Ford looks lost in thought again before replying “i… it's foolish but i never thought of it that way…” he looks at you with thankfulness in his eyes and you can't help but smile up at him “you should maybe sort this out with him? Talk to him about what actually happened and if he meant to hurt you?” 
“God you're right… Thank you! This changes everything! I'm so glad I could just kiss you!” 
….
It takes him a second to realise what he said and blush at the thought of actually kissing you. You just stare at him dumbly for a second until your brain processes what he said.
He wants to kiss you?
Well this took a turn for the better.
“Do you really mean that?” you ask him with hope in your eyes
“Well… yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t i? Look at you” he finds that it's suddenly very important you understand how much he wants to kiss you. “Wow… i- i didn't know you felt the same…” you say softly and look down. He says your name and puts his hand on your cheek and lifts up your face to meet his eyes “i like you. More than as a friend. Would you… let me kiss you?” he looks at you nervously for a moment before you close the gap between you two and kiss him yourself.
The kiss feels electrifying. As your soft lips meet his you put your arms around his neck to pull him closer. You realise he smells exactly how you thought he would; of old books and aftershave. His hands find your waist and rub gentle circles with his thumbs into your skin. You pull away after a little and touch your forehead with his “you have no idea how long i've wanted to do that” you whisper gently.
“Me too” and he goes back to kissing you, this time he takes the lead. You tighten yourself around him until your chests meet, his hands move down to your hips and he pulls you onto his lap in one swoop. You gently bite his lip as he groans into your open lips. He then moves down to kiss from your jaw to your neck, leaving the occasional love bite. You sigh at his bites until he gets to your collarbones. “Do you…. Want to do this?” he breathes the question against your skin, the feeling of him against you makes you shudder. “Yes. im sure”. He straightens up from excitement and goes back to kissing you collarbone, now more eager than ever as his hands travel past the hem of your shirt and up to your bra. Meanwhile your hands go down to feel him underneath you.
“Someone is excited” you smirk as he breaths heavily against you. 
“Very” his response falls heavy against you as he unclasps your bra (with only a little bit of a struggle) and his hands move to massage your breasts. You moan as he pinches your nipples in between his fingers. You lower your head to bite at his shoulder to stifle another moan from falling out of your lips- “No” he says and moves his shoulder to get you to stop muffling your sounds. “I want to hear you”. The thought of him wanting to hear you like this makes you blush and sends a bolt of pleasure down your spine. “Y-yes’’ 
You intend to start massaging him through his pants but he beats you to it, moving his hand down into your pants. You help him take off your pants and underwear (with a lot of struggle because of your position) and he suddenly picks you up and places you on the table. The cold desk underneath you only adds to the pleasure as he caresses your side before moving his hand down to finally touch you. 
His hand caresses your folds and feels how wet you are, and you moan from the feeling of his thick fingers on your sensitive skin. “Damn, you feel so good” he whimpers at how you feel before kissing your breasts and plunging his index finger inside you. “A-ah~” you sigh as he moves his hand so his thumb is circling your clit. 
He continues pumping his finger inside of you for a second before adding a second one and speeding up the pace. If he continues like this you wont last long. Almost as if he can hear your thoughts, he stops and goes down onto his knees, his face in front of your core. “Can I please taste you?” he asks innocently, as if his request isn't the most dirty thing you've heard him say. Thinking about it makes you even more aroused -if that's even possible at this point- and you hastily agree.
Not even a second after he sees you nod does he jump into your pussy, his tongue plunging into you and licking you from the inside. His nose bumps into your clit as he moves to taste and lick you even more. Your breath hitches and you moan loudly as he begins sucking at your clit, toying and teasing it with his tongue. “Please F-Ford” you manage to say in between moans. He groans against you and the vibrations send a wave of pleasure through you.
He suddenly brings his fingers back into you, curling them just right, hitting that spongy spot inside you that sends you over the edge. 
You briefly hear him let out a broken “Fu-uck” as your orgasm ripples through you in waves. Ford helps you ride out your high as he continues fingering you and licking at your clit. You have to push him off of you as it becomes too overstimulating
You try to pull him up to his knees, but he seems embarrassed by something. He looks up at you with his chin and nose glistening from your wetness, a guilty smile on his lips and his glasses fogged up and crooked. You then look down and notice it. A wet spot against his jeans
oh.
He got off on pleasuring you. He turned into a mess from just tasting you, feeling you on his lips and fingers. “That's the hottest thing i've ever seen” you say suddenly and lean down to kiss him passionately. He pulls away “really? You think so?” he looks at you in shock. “Yes! Now let me kiss you” you bring him up and kiss him passionately. He takes the hint, grabs at your hips and grunts. You can feel him already hardening again so you pull at his belt and pull down his pants and underwear. You softly grab him and start moving your hand up and down as he whimpers against your lips. You bring up your hand and spit onto it in order to create less friction when touching him.
“Please Ford- fuck me” you moan into his ear and he leans his head back in pleasure. “But i don't have-” you cut him off “there's some condoms in the front pocket of my bag, please” you emphasise your point by giving his cock another stroke. This seems to fuel him on to run to your bag and get the condom. He opens the packet and rolls it onto his member. He rubs his cock against your folds to collect your juices and as his head rubs against your oversensitive clit you moan. “Please put it inside” you hold onto his shoulders as he follows your request and pushes his tip in slowly.
He slowly pushes himself inside you until he's bottomed out inside you and you both groan. You move your hips experimentally and he whimpers at the feeling of you around him. He slowly starts to pull out and then thrusts back in with a moan of your name. You dig your fingers into the soft skin of his shoulders as he continues thrusting inside of you slowly. 
He continues gently until you decide to whisper in his ear something that changes his attitude completely “harder- please~”. He understands the message and suddenly picks you up and flips you around -while still inside of you- and bends you over the table. You moan at the sudden change of positions but you have no time to get used to it as he starts thrusting into you at a killer pace. He moves his hips sharply into you, with an almost mechanical pace as he pushes your chest onto the table with his broad torso. You can't help the sounds you let out each time he hits that deep spot inside of you. He grunts into your ear at each thrust and it makes your eyes water from all the pleasure.
You're suddenly pushed over the edge for the second time when he wraps his hand around your body and starts playing with you clit. You scream his name as you cum around his cock. His pace stutters a bit and he curses in your ear as he cums too for the second time.
He slowly eases you both down with some gentler thrusts and then exits out of you with a sensual pop. 
You lay down for a little while with your ass out before you gather some strength to get up. As soon as you do, your legs start to shake and Ford catches you in his arms and chuckles a bit with pride. “So…. did you like that?”  
You dead-pan him and say “no. i didn't like that. Of course I liked that you doofus!” he laughs a bit and kisses you again. “I just wanted to make sure!” he says against your lips. You giggle and pull him even closer “well, i enjoyed that a lot” you give him a small peck on the nose and then pull away to put your clothes back on. He disposes of the condom and goes to put on his pants but pauses. “I can't go out with a wet spot on my pants…. What should I do?” he looks terrified at the thought of walking around campus like that.
“Don't worry, i always carry an extra sweatshirt around in case the ac is too much in class” you laugh as he looks at you like you just saved his life “you are an angel!” he comes up to you and kisses you again before going back to putting on his pants. You hand him the sweatshirt and he ties it around his waist in order to hide the evidence of what happened.
He then comes up to you and hugs you. “You know i meant what i said, right? About liking you” you blush and then respond “i meant what i said too”
“Then can this not be a one time thing? I want to -if you’d want of course, there's no pressure if you don't want to do anything more than what happened today but-” you cut him off to spare him from rambling even more “i’d like to go on a date with you, Ford. i want to go out with you and be with you” he sighs with relief. “Great! Are you free tomorrow?” you check your calendar “yeah i should be- do you want to meet up?” 
“I would love that” he kisses your forehead before picking up your bag and the keys to the room.
You go out but as Ford locks the door, he realises something.
“Why do you have condoms in your bag?”
You immediately flush a deep red as you remember the fact that after first meeting him, your horney brain convinced you to put some condoms in your bag. ‘Just in case something happens’ you thought to yourself
“No reason” you yelp out and pull at his bicep so he continues walking and change the subject.
He chuckles at your antics but goes along with you.
He’ll just have to ask another time.
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luvyeni · 4 months
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p. personaltrainer!shotaro x fem!reader | warnings: | words: ~ 0.8k (859) 🦦ㆍ₊⊹
authors note. if you saw me going crazy over that taro pic then you understand me now
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
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you didn't want a personal trainer, but your best friend thought it would be best since you didn't really know what to do in the gym. “he does night appointments so you won't be embarrassed because of the people in the gym.”
eventually you caved, calling the man, he gave you a time and a date; telling you to wear something comfortable and moveable.
when the day comes you out on your matching set that you bought the day prior, the appointment was at 6:30 pm and you got there around 6:25, waiting for the man you talked with on the phone. your hands were clammy, you felt nervous. about to say fuck it and go home and stuff your face. “hello.” you turn around and there he is, a smile on his face. “I'm shotaro, you must be yn.” you nodded. “he-hello.” you waved.
“let's get started, let's stretch first, i know this is your first time and we don't want you to be in pain in the morning.” he was too nice, guiding you through the stretches. “good job.” he came up behind you. “you're doing so good.” you gulped , you knew he meant no harm , but your mind couldn't help going to a dirty place. “okay, now with some squats.”
shotaro watched you through the mirror; his eyes trained on your ass, the way the sweat rolled down your forehead and into the crease of your bust; his cock hardening in his shorts. your friend had called him and told him a little bit about you and he was intrigued, you were a bit timid, jumpy everytime he touched you to readjust your positions; it made him smile, you were cute.
your plushy thigh that he could only dream of putting his face in between. by the time the appointment was over, shotaro was painfully hard— you weren't any better though, your underwear was soaked. his touch felt like fire, you had to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from whimpering or letting out an embarrassing moan.
“you did such a good job today.” he handed you a water bottle. “if you keep it up you'll get to your goal weight.” your eyes lit. “really?” he watched you, smiling at how happy you were. “go shower.” you nodded, he watched you walk away.
you let the water run down your body, the hot water soothing the already sore muscles; your hands finding it's way in between your thighs, you let out a moan, thank god there was no one else in there. — that you know of. “fu-fuck.” you cursed, letting your fingers run along your slit.
your eyes were closed and you were moaning so loud, you didn't hear the door open, shotaro walking in. your hand came up to your boobs, squeezing them; one of your fingers teasing your waiting hole.
before you could even push a finger inside you were pushed against the wall. “fuck, I tired to wait.” shotaro groaned against your ear. “but you were moaning so fucking loud.” you felt his cock twitching against your ass. “m’need to fuck you.” he kissed along your neck. “pl- please.” you moaned.
he held your back in a arch as he seethed his cock inside you, moaning. “oh fuck, been wanting to do that since i walked in and saw you in that tight outfit.” the sound of your wet bodies along with yours moans bouncing off the empty walls. “fuck shotaro!”
“shit your pussy feels so good.” he groaned. “so tight.” he was fucking you so good, your precious tits were bouncing with his thrust. “sh-shotaro I'm gonna cum.” he moaned as your pussy squeezed him. “shit cum for baby.” he reached in front running your clit. “cum all over my cock.”
you moaned out, letting yourself go, legs shaking as you came. “shit shit shit.” shotaro cursed, pulling out cumming all over your back. “fuck.” he stroked himself until he had no more to give.
after cleaning up, and getting dressed; you two exited the bathroom. “i think I'll have to find a new gym, I can't show my face here.” you said embarrassed. “why would you do that when i own the gym?” he said, your eyes widened, your friend didn't tell you he was the owner. “that just makes it even worse.” he smiled, grabbing your hand. “why is that, so what I helped you work out in more ways then one.” he smirked, your face heated up. “stop it.” you whined, he laughed. “fine, come back or don't come back but I'm serious about you working out considering, i really want you to meet your goal.” he said making your heart flutter. “and maybe if you're free we can go get dinner.”
“me?” you questioned. “yes you.” he said. “i wanted to ask you that first, but things got out of hand.” he said. “what do you say?” you smiled nodding. “sure.” he kissed your hand goodnight after walking you to your car. “I'll call you.” he said watching you drive away.
you drove all the way home with a dumb smile on your face.
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©️LUVYENI
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So basically the entire character list of The ballad of songbirds and snakes is the exes from hell
1. Coriolanus Snow
-Mansplain Manipulate Manwhore
-Great hair and fashion sense
-Love bombs you
-Old money
-His (grand)mom hates you because her son can do no wrong so clearly you're the problem
-His favourite hobby is emotional and mental abuse
-Snitches on you when cheating at family board game night (he's deflecting that he's also cheating)
-Emotionally stagnant (narcissist with mommy and daddy issues)
2. Sejanus Plinth
-Loves you to bits, so does his mom (your waistline will never truly recover)
-Indecisive about where to grab dinner always
-New money and it shows in his insecurity
-Supportive asf
-Breaks up with you because he can't be with a non pacifist/vegan
-Daddy issues
-Condemns Shein hauls
-Identity crisis every other week, you'll have to talk him out of a buzz cut, jumping off the ledge or giving all his money to scammers (if you collect all the stamps you'll get a financial compensation from his dad on the wedding day)
3. Lucy Gray Baird
-Her Ex is a dick, will stalk and harass you
-Her family is a bunch of hippies, will make you eat with your hands, on the floor, while singing Kumbaya
-Sings you to sleep, braids your hair
-Almost poisoned you thrice cause she doesn't understand you shouldn't mix cleaning products together
-Old soul
-Thrifts, recycles
-Puts salt in your coffee after arguments
-Ghosts you after your make or break argument
4. Casca Highbottom
-Never asks about your day, his is always worse
-Drug addict in denial
-Weird beef with his old classmate's son (he never lets anything go)
-Dislikes people, which would be fine if you weren't included
-Always on some sardonic shit, probably a business major with a psych minor
-His pills take all the space in the shared bathroom, your makeup will be shoved in the far lowest drawer next to the TP
-His ancient ass coworkers hit on you at symposiums, he's too high off bathroom cocaine to stop them (or gets off, either way you're tired and want home)
5. Dr Gaul
-Devil Incarnate
-You somehow rizzed her up at a function and she's been showing up at your house ever since (you don't how but she has both the address and a key)
-Petting zoo type of owner
-She always smells like chemicals and latex
-Asks you unhinged "Would you rather" questions and refuses to drop it (makes your Would you love me if i were a worm ex cute by a long shot)
-Will perform experiments on you without your knowledge or consent
-Insists her pet snake shares your bed
-Freak in the streets and the sheets (the restraining order won't even go through cause she's in cahoots with half the Government)
-Definitely wanted for war crimes somewhere, the G in Geneva convention stands for Gaul
6. Lucky Flickerman
-A clown.
-His hair and skincare products take over the entire bathroom/vanity
-He can't dress to save his life, but he sure thinks he can
-Golden retriever boyfriend energy
-Steals your concealer, refuses to admit it
-Would you like to see a magic trick? What do you mean this is a serious fight, there's a quarter up your nose
-Impulsive buyer, has 13 snow globes of panem because they were on sale and looked shiny
-Even his pet thinks he's a dumbass
-Cries during movies
7. Tigris
-Yes she do the cooking, yes she do the cleaning
-Insecure about her appearance (critical, will cost you)
-Her family is a bunch of snobs
-Anything she touches turns into gold
-Her cousin can do no wrong, you have to accommodate everything for him or she'll die (and he never even visits, "just in case")
-Her grandmother is a package deal, I hope you like boomer propaganda and info commercials early on Sunday morning
-Empathetic asf
-Puts everyone's needs above hers (and unfortunately yours)
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paleprincessturtle · 1 year
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Could you write a Harvey x reader being in a secret relationship because she's Mike's younger sister? Maybe she works at the firm as a paralegal or just likes to swing by to annoy her older brother from time to time.
Hey! Thanks for the request anon. Hopefully, I can capture your vision in my writings.
Feel free to send more requests.
Enjoy!
Bagels
Pairing: Harvey Specter x Female Reader
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If anyone is more important to Mike Ross than Rachel Zane, right now breathing on the face of the earth, it will be his sister. His baby sister. After the death of their parents, Mike always vowed to protect his sister. That was why Mike took it without hesitation when he got the chance to do an (almost) honest job with the firm. Mike admitted that maybe he got way too protective over her sister. She's 5 years younger than her, certainly an adult now. But in his eyes, she'll always be the little girl with teary eyes asking for their dead parents.
Unlike Mike, his sister wasn't gifted with a super brain. But she was gifted with super hands. She never took any culinary schools or any baking courses but she could bake anything and would taste heavenly. 6 months after his time at the firm, Mike could finally afford to help his sister build her own bakery. Conveniently, only around 15 minutes from the firm. Give or take.
When Jessica found out about Mike, his sister was the first person he confided in. They were pretty much sure that Mike would just be a cashier at her bakery. But when Jessica let it slide, his sister met with Jessica. Dressed as best as she could, she came to the office, asking for a Jessica Pearson. She wasn't there empty-handed, she brought with her a dozen eclairs and quiche. She didn't know whether Jessica was a sweet or a savory person, so she brought one for each possibility. Jessica wasn't necessarily happy when she saw her come into her office. But Jessica has seen tons of people, and she knew when one is genuine. So Jessica thanked her and upon tasting her baked goods, Jessica had an idea for her to take several of her products from her bakery every morning to the firm. Boy, was everyone happy when they saw fresh baked goods in the lounge.
That day was also the first time Harvey Specter laid eyes on Mike Ross' sister.
It was just like any other morning, Mike was sitting in his office when her sister came and threw a pebble to his head. "Bullseye!" she giggled and entered his office. Mike rubbed his forehead. "If I bleed, I'll sue you for violence." Mike leaned back in his chair as he observed his sister. "And I'll scream in the lobby that you're a..." she paused then took a deep breath, "FRAAAAUD!!!" Mike stood so fast from his chair about to catch his sister but she ran away and laughed.
She finally finished dropping everything in both lounges. But she made it a ritual to always drop some extras for everyone who know the truth about Mike. She dropped some in Jessica's office, Louis' office, now off to Donna, then Harvey's.
"Donna, you looked exceptionally gorgeous today. Is that a new dress?" she leaned over as she placed a small jar of pistachio cookies on her desk. Donna smirked and nodded towards Harvey's office, "he won't have any meeting for another hour. And Mike shouldn't be around too." She leaned even more forward to give Donna a kiss on the cheek. Donna also leaned forward to meet her halfway and let her kiss her cheek. She smiled and marched inside. "Sunshine," Harvey greeted her with a wide grin. He stood up from his chair and kissed her lips. "Hello, Mr. Handsome," she looked up at him as she admired his clean-shaven face. She turned her back and walked to take another small basket she brought with her. "Everyone got pistachio cookies today, but I made you bagels." Harvey's eyes got as big as the moon. "Aren't you the best. Now, I don't have to spend any lunch money."
Mike walked briskly towards Harvey's office with a stack of files. His findings were brilliant, he thought to himself. As he got closer to Harvey's office, he heard a muffled laugh. Not just any muffled laugh, his sister's muffled laugh. He glanced at Donna's desk and found it empty. So he invited himself in.
"Well, aren't you two cozy," Mike asked in a thick sarcastic tone. Harvey who was trying to take one of his signed basketballs back for Mike's sister stopped laughing and turned to see the intruder in his office. She also looked at where Harvey looking at. "Mike, catch!" she threw one of Harvey's PRECIOUS signed basketballs toward Mike. Mike dropped every file in his hands to catch the basketballs. Harvey smirked, while his sister almost exploded from laughing. What was on Mike's mind wasn't the now important files on the floor, which created a mess. But the fact that Harvey didn't even get mad when she touched one of his precious basketballs. Not only did she touch it, she threw it. Mike looked bewildered between the two important people in front of him right now. Ball still firmly in hands, he looked around. He saw no little jar filled with cookies. He found a little basket instead, filled with bagels and various spreads. Home-made spreads. Mike calmed himself as he walked and put the ball on its throne. "Bagels for Harvey? You know he likes bagels?" Mike pointedly looked at his sister, arms folded. "Who doesn't know what Harvey likes?" she tried to laugh it off. "Nice spending times with you guys, but not only you guys who have an empire to run, but so do I. Ciao!" She was about to go when Mike called out for her. "Sit," Mike ordered her. All these years being his sister, it was the first time she ever heard him using that tone on her. She obeyed. He observed the two of them. Harvey looked calm, much in contrast to his sister who looked like she was about to get busted for bringing a ton of cocaine. "You two are together?" Mike questioned. No one answered. "You two are together!" Mike gasped. "I thought she always brought you different things from her bakery because she ran out and had to give you leftovers. She always gave you your favorites. And you didn't get pissed at her touching your basketballs! Because you like her!" She was confused about what to do. Mike looked like he was about to lunge at Harvey but looked very much bamboozled. "Look," Harvey said as he walked past Mike to sit beside her. "We've been together, for the past 4 months." Another gasp from Mike. Harvey took her hand in his, waited for Mike's reaction. "Of all girls you could have.. It has to be my sister.." Mike said slowly. He looked at you, asked for an explanation. "He made me so happy, Mike. Really happy." Mike softened at his sister's response. When Mike looked at Harvey, he caught Harvey smiling down at his sister. It looked, genuine. As if he... "I'm not happy that you two kept it from me for months but I'm happy you two are happy, but," Mike stood in front of her and offered her his hand. "I need to talk to you," Mike said all serious. She nodded and squeezed Harvey's hand before she stood up. "And I have to talk to you after this," Mike said as he pointed his finger at Harvey. Harvey nodded, stood up, and patted Mike on the shoulder, before walking back to his desk. "Come," Mike rushed her outside. But before she left Harvey's office, she looked back at him and smiled. Harvey winked at her and she giggled. "DON'T WINK AT MY SISTER HARVEY!" Mike said without even looking as he rushed you out even more.
MASTERLIST
529 notes · View notes
shadowystan · 1 year
Text
YANDERE! husband x f!reader– marriage can't be that bad, right? (wrong)
YANDERE!husband who's the epitome of wealth and fame. He can give you the world, yes, but why would he?
YANDERE!husband who treats you like the dirt beneath his feet from the very get go. Misogynistic and conservative to a fault, he believes women should really just sit back and let their men do the work.
(While they, of course, rot off in kitchens and behind sewing machines.)
YANDERE!husband who was sure he was going to get a pretty slave of a wife. Now, pray tell, why does his woman refuse to even touch him on the first night of their wedding?
"I won't sleep with you."
Headstrong and stern, you don't seem like a docile little thing. Far from it actually. Your brows are furrowed and there's a certain determination behind your eyes.
It's infuriating. 
YANDERE!husband who may as well be a cliche high school bully with his jabs and manhandling. He isn't abusive. But that's only because you're tied down to him, anyway. Why must he get physical when you don't have anywhere to go or money to call your own?
Or. Well. Do you?
YANDERE!husband who frowns deeply when you tell him you're going for a job interview. Surely, you must be joking?
Ah, that's right.
YANDERE!husband who smiles big and chokes out a hearty laugh. "That's a good one! You're funny, wife."
You were, in fact, not joking.
YANDERE!husband who's appalled, eyes blown wide and lips slightly parted when you wake up at 6 in the morning the next day with a snugly wrapped pant set around your body, looking like the embodiment of a classy business woman.
"I got the job," You dryly inform him.
YANDERE!husband who's a pissbaby. Complaining to his parents how you aren't obedient or submissive. Blaming his old man for not 'giving' him a feminine, exclusively child bearing wife.
YANDERE!husband who tries restricting you. He's richer and more influential than you. Why can't he stop you?
He fails to understand you have legs. And a healthy, working mind.
YANDERE!husband who after putting you on house arrest comes home to you working from home on your laptop. YANDERE!husband who's beaming and shining when he confiscates your electronics the next day, thinking you'll stop being so stubborn only to find out you sent the kitchen staff home out of spite.
YANDERE!husband who, after a while, realises that letting you just work is better than coming home to a starving stomach.
YANDERE!husband who's not really, well, a yandere yet. Or.. is he?
YANDERE!husband who just needed one action from you to turn completely obsessed. A curt nod of approval here, an amused eyebrow raise there and he's putty in your hands.
But does that make him kind? God, no.
YANDERE!husband who shows just how terrifying he could be after finally falling for you. The childish, humorously masculine man you knew is gone now.
You're a strong person but YANDERE!husband is scary to say the least.
"Don't wear this."
"Dress modest, wife."
"Behave."
It's not fine anymore. He makes you feel unsafe. He is unsafe.
YANDERE!husband who fires every single one of his maids and servants. 
"You'll be the one cooking now, dear wife."
Has he always been this tall?
YANDERE!husband who flashes you a calm smile, suffocating you in his presence when you refuse to cook or clean.
YANDERE!husband who simply says:
"It's better to learn now, dear," He takes a step forward, figure towering over you. A hand reaches out. You don't flinch.
His smile widens at that, large hand gently patting you on the head, calloused palm smoothing out your hair.
"Really," He continues. "It's every housewife's duty to do so."
Your eyes widened and dread filled your stomach.
"I'm not a-"
"Plus," He cuts you off. Has his smile always looked so vicious? "A mother should be ideal. If we have a girl, – God, I hope not – you'd have to know a few things to pass on to her, yeah?"
A chill runs down your spine. You gulp, lips trembling as you voice out your next word.
"D-daughter?"
He grins, looking awfully boyish for someone who has just indirectly told you that you won't be going to your job anymore.
"Heh, you'd prefer a boy too, right? They're superior."
You let out a shaky breath.
"I.. We won't be having a child."
He paused. Your heart stopped.
"Ah, of course," He threw a soft smile your way, as if understanding your situation. "Of course, of course; we'll have to teach you how to become a perfect wife first, yes?"
Fuck.
436 notes · View notes
hollyhomburg · 1 year
Text
Before I Leave You (Pt.58)
(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)
Summary: Your nightmares are a troubling development but the pack won't let you drown. They have different ideas on how to help you. Some more damaging than others.
Tags: Angst, Hurt/comfort, Fluff, Cuddling, scent marking, Nightmares, graphic depiction of fake character death, Discussions of past rape, No explicit depictions of past rape/sexual assault, past domestic-abuse, flashbacks, safe-wording during sex (Sorta), unpleasant sexual encounters, under-negotiated kink, mentioned sex toys, crying during sex, Sad blow jobs, small dick jungkook, allusions to past eating disorders, anxiety, implied self-hate, self-esteem issues, non-verbal main character.
W/c: 12.9k
A/N: this chapter was originally supposed to be a lot longer- but i got too in depth with it and had to split it up. This is easily one of the more heavy chapters of bily (and that's saying something), so please be mindful of the tags! For anyone wanting to skip the super triggering parts in the next chapter i've highlighted a sentence in red font both after the first triggering section and before the very triggering ending.
Special thanks to @imperiussexrex for helping me with jk's part <3 they're the bestest <3
Previous Chapter- Masterlist
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"Sleep well, my lovely little spy."
Jin’s eyes flutter open, looking up at the beta who's watching him with a gentle but noticeably tense smile. Jin’s mouth is dry, he could pretend he didn’t hear anything but there would be no use. The truth wouldn’t change.
"Holy shit.” Jin’s whole body is ridged. Ready to run. In panic mode. But Yoongi’s hand settles on his shoulder. It’s the same touch as always and just as gentle and kind as it was both this mourning and 6 years ago. Yoongi has always been a kind soul, regardless of every secret Jin's ever learned to love about him.
Letting himself be known in return feels a little bit more perilous. Jin’s heart thuds against his fingertips. He swallows hard.
Yoongi hums, agreeing with Jin’s assessment. He runs a hand gently through Jin’s hair. Tugging away loose a knot. “Holy shit indeed.”
Everything is fine. In the wake of the dead body, everything in the pack is absolutely fine.
(That’s a lie, everything is definitely not fine, everything is in fact- falling apart. Like a butterfly larva worming its way to crystalize. Carving its way towards both womb and tomb. Something that changes you or destroys you.)
Jin and Yoongi can only hope.
It’s only hope after all. How much damage can it really do?
~-~
Your unraveling starts with the Nightmares.
Tonight, it’s a dark tangle of half-forgotten moments. A movie with all of the scariest scenes copied and pasted. Bright punctures of feelings like blood dripping down your chin and the tang of it in your mouth. Geumjae’s scent in your nose as he shoves your mouth against his skin. All of it. Every unhappy memory that your psyche has locked away for later drags you down like the tide would drag a stone to a watery grave.
Until the moments condense like a figure rising through fog and you’re sitting in that house again. The one with the yellow brocade curtains pulled closed across the windows so that no one sees what happens inside.
You're sitting with Geumjae at the dining room table. The elaborate meal in front of you rises with steam and smells divine calling you like a moth to honey. The cutlery is polished so clean that you can see your reflection in it. A million dancing tiny versions of you stare back with vacant doll-like eyes.
You remember this meal; you remember what happened to you on this morning. The soreness between your legs reminds you of that horror. You remember how hard you worked after he left in the morning after leaving you in a bloody heap on the bathroom floor. You remember hoping that if you did everything you absolutely could to prepare this meal, He’d be satisfied and he wouldn’t hurt you again.
But avoiding rape is never quite so easy.
It was foolish to hope back then. Geumjae was a man of routine and he required your body every morning and evening without fail. But hoping is so hard to avoid, like an itch under your skin that demands biting nails, a furious sort of wanting. Hope is nothing more than a chain that drags you through the sludge when you think it might be your buoy.
In this nightmare, the other chairs at the table aren’t empty like they usually are. It’s not just you here.
He must have taken a needle and stitched your mouth shut (like he always threatened) because you feel powerless to scream at Namjoon to get away to stay back. You can do nothing more than watch as he leans over and says something to Geumjae that makes him smile. His smile makes him look like Yoongi; who sits at the head of the table and nurses a glass of wine while scowling.
Jin is on Namjoon's other side, hair combed back from his face in a way that makes Seokjin look absurdly pretty. The picture of delicate omega composure. Each of them eats like they haven't in days, shoveling food into their mouths like it’s their last meal.
Jungkook is by your side and asks if you’re going to eat your dinner roll. Puffy and crusty bread that he never would be able to eat in real life. You watch powerlessly as he scarfs it down like he hasn’t ever eaten anything more delicious. Licking his fingers from the crumbs when he finishes.
Tae is dressed in your jewels this time, not Jimin's. The necklace Geumjae gave you for your second anniversary digs into her collar bones as if it was pinned there. Like a butterfly on a piece of cardboard. Glittering with more diamonds than seem possible. Like one of those Instagram filters, every reflection mark turned glittery. Jimin’s suit is like something out of vogue.
One moment you’re looking at the perfectly edible food and the next you’re watching it rot before your very eyes. The meat greying and melting. The salad wilts gooey and spoiled. The fancy porcelain plates writhing with worms and maggots and creepy crawlies that slither out of nowhere. A spider inches its way up your fork.
No one notices. No one realizes that the bites they bring to their lips are poison. Jin licks his lips, the skin already greying and cracking.
Geumjae looks up at you from his plate, grinning all the while. Collar starched white. You haven’t heard his voice in so long but your mind remembers the exact cadence of it in perfect detail.
“What’s wrong princess? Aren’t you going to eat up?
When you look back at them it's already too late. Namjoon’s slumped in his chair staring blankly forward with bloody eyes. When you look Jin’s got his head half gone. Cut away. Wriggly things curl behind what's left of his eye.
Tae’s collarbones are bleeding where the diamond collar sits. Ribbons drip down her bodice. Jimin’s white shirt is slowly blooming red too. Bullet wounds pepper his chest. One on his shoulder and a cluster of them over his heart.
Jungkook slumps over his plate seizing until he’s still. Still the way that dolls are. Dead. Looking at you with wide vacant eyes that go grey with congealing blood.
Yoongi's hands are burning, fire licking up his clothes and he does nothing to put it out. Burning and bubbling and boiling. Skin peeling up like paint beneath the flames.
Hoseok is the only one not at the table.
Across from you, Geumjae smiles again. Baring his teeth in that animal way of his. “What’s wrong princess? I thought you said you loved them- aren’t you going to try and stop it?”
One moment he’s across the table and the next he’s leaning over you, back in that bedroom that was your hellhole less than a year ago. Pulling you by your hips to the end of the bed when you try to twist away. He fumbles with his belt buckle.
The sheets burn against your skin like its rug burn and although you weakly push at his chest. It feels like you're moving in slow motion. Your strength is nothing compared to his. It never was enough in real life anyway.
“No- no I don’t want- please don’t,” you choke. Trying to get him off of you, when he opens his mouth there are maggots there too.
You never did find out what they did with Geumjae’s body. But now you know as the rotting corpse of your dead husband assaults you. Boney hands grab your wrists as the worms drip out, dangle, and wriggle, falling onto your face and-
One of the terrible things about the big nest upstairs is that it’s really easy to get trapped in the middle with no easy way out.
Hobi finds himself in that position when he wakes. It’s the middle of the night, nearly 3 am probably when he’s roused by the familiar ache in his stomach that tells him he needs to pee.
The shades are pulled across the windows keeping the light out, and what little slips through is kept out by a thin curtain that sections off the nest from the rest of the room. Shielding the familiar lumps of packmates buried beneath the nest slumbering away.
It feels good to have all of you sleeping in one space, the instinctual pleasure flutters and builds on the edge of Hobi’s consciousness as he lifts his head. Barely opening his eyes. It feels homey in the way that Namjoon's rut nest hadn't. It's a true nest, Smelling thick and cakey sweet all of your scents drench it now after a few days of you all sleeping here. After finding the dead body, the decision had been unanimous. No more sleeping separately. No more splitting up between the upstairs nest and the remnants of yours downstairs.
Even though it's a new space some things never change. Jimin still sleeps at the edge near the bottom, guarding the nest from the most logical point of vulnerability. Although that might be because of last week.
The pack has made a few other adjustments in terms of safety since you and Hobi found the dead body. Many a moment has hobi walked into a room with Jin and Yoongi only to have them fall silent. But he doesn't have to ask what new precautions they've agreed upon.
They’ve fallen back into the habit of letting each other know when they get to work safely and when they leave, and when to expect them home (the same habit they had just after yoongi left actually) Phone locations are perpetually turned on just in case. But Hobi knows the only time any of them feel truly settled is when they’re all up here.
The nest is big. Big enough for all of you to sleep comfortably, even all sprawled out. But as thoughtful as Yoongi was when he constructed the space he certainly did not think about how hard it would be to leave for a midnight bathroom break given the walls that close in on three sides.
Now, Hobi is trapped and bound by blankets and fancy pillows and the gently sleeping bodies of his pack all around him. The border is high and fluffed. It’s in an alpha's nature to be careful around his packmates and it goes against something very basic in Hobi to even think about disturbing the carefully placed pillows and blankets, the general purposeful disarray of such a cozy nest. Alphas simply don’t fuck with omega nests.
But on the other hand, he’s seriously stuck.
Namjoon, Jimin, and Jin are at the bottom blocking off the most logical point of egress. Jin’s head rests on Jimin's shoulder, dark hair fanning. Yoongi is tangled up with Tae (her hair in these little puffy rollers). And Jungkook’s star fished and spread out by the top edge, right where Hobi was. His fingers rest under his shirt like he’s been rubbing at his stomach. Snoring softly.
Hobi’s heart swells just looking at them.
The only safe avenue of exit where Hobi won’t be climbing over two people is near the bottom left, close to Jin and Namjoon, where you lie on your side, cheek pillowed. Chest rising up and down a little rapidly in the darkness. It’s so dark that Hobi doesn’t see it at first.
Hobi’s so half-asleep that he doesn’t even realize right away that you’re not as undisturbed as the others. That you occasionally twitch like a puppy.
Hobi is no stranger to maneuvering his lithe body around sleeping packmates, muscles straining as he very gently pulls himself over you. Depressing the mattress by your side. His baggy sleep shirt momentarily brushes your face as he shifts over you.
Your reaction is instinctual, one moment asleep and the next awake. Your scent going sour all at once. Exploding in a rush. You push out with your arms, still in the nightmare.
One second Hobi’s on the bed the next he’s stumbling out of it, Barely keeping himself from falling face-first onto the floor. Bare feet slide on the polished wood when he gets them under him. Cursing out a brief “What the fuck?” looking back, ready to be angry at being shoved.
But then he sees that you're sitting up, trembling so hard that your hands can't grip the blanket to get it off of you. Eyes wide and glassy with panic. You blink and blink, lower lip wobbling.
There is a single moment where he just looks at you, but then you let out a small (and admittedly pathetic) chirp.
There is nothing like a chirp that tugs on an alpha’s hindbrain, that drags Hobi's instincts to the forefront like a hook in a fish's mouth. He's honestly surprised that the sound doesn't wake anyone else. Maybe because it's so quiet, so small.
It’s just a dream, just a very bad dream, and your pack is sleeping softly around you. The next thing you feel is Hobi gently crushing you to his chest. Smelling like caramel and boy. Tenderly whipping back your hair from your face. His warm fingertips press against your tender temples dislodging the last bit of you that can't tell if this is real yet.
“Pup? What’s wrong- what happened?"
Hobi looks about as different from Geumjae as anyone possibly could, his jaw slender where Geumjae was wide, eyes bright where his went dark and hooded. Unthreatening and normal brown in the glow.
But just like the dream, you can’t fucking speak.
“Fuck- it was just a dream, whatever it was- it’s not real- I’m-”
You’re shaking and crying and you can’t respond. Your throat is all tight. All of you that is usually happy and gentle is reduced small and scared and quiet. You can't tell where the shadows end and where reality begins. You can only feel his hands. That's the only thing that feels real beyond the terror.
You can't look around; you can't look around at the others- too scared that they'll be dead.
Thank God for the physical nature of Hobi’s job. Herking bags of soil and 30-gallon trees has honestly done him good because it means he can carry you downstairs with a little effort.
Real panic circles his head like a bunch of buzzards, threatening to pick his heart clean. "Hang on- here we go." He turns on each of the lights one by one by leaning into them. Shoulder hitting the plastic, the two of you safer with each click. "See- there isn't anything to be scared of! There's no one here but us."
Hobi is right, Hobi would never lie to you. This kitchen is not the same one from your nightmares. The blinds are blinds and not curtains, drawn to keep out the streetlights not any prying eyes. The old rickety table where the pack has their meals isn't piled with food at all. Only some tangerines in a wooden bowl in the center.
You’re small and shaky in an extra big shirt of Namjoon’s that pools on your thighs when he places you on gently the countertop with a small 'oof'. You're already a little more lucid, eyes darting from the light to the shadows and still trembling faintly. Hobi knows instantly from the stillness that you’re nonverbal. Mouth uncooperative. Your brain is a mix of misplaced adrenaline and cortisol. You smell terrified.
“It’s okay, it’s just a dream, here-” Hobi fills up a yellow plastic cup with water and tips it against your lips. The cold soothes your throat but not to the point that you can speak. You’re unwilling to detangle yourself from him. Real and warm and there now that you’ve got him. hand tangled in the front of his shirt, clinging to him.
He hums as he dabs a cold dishcloth across on your hot cheeks. “You’re okay- I’ve got you.” You lean into his hands, legs parted so that he can stand between them. You look so sad and so small that Hobi’s heart hurts.
You don’t want to speak, really don’t want to but you force yourself anyways. “Don’t remember them- usually- Or wake up in the middle- sorry- M' sorry.”
Your eyes itch, and your face feels all puffy as he continues to dab at it. The cloth is rough and Cold, but hobi's warm where his skin touches yours.
Alive and safe. you barely want to blink incase you miss it.
“Don’t apologize, it’s okay.” Hobi continues to dab at your cheeks, “You get them often?” You shake your head instead of responding and Hobi’s scent goes thick with upset, burning sugar ever so slightly smokey. You sniffle still sort of crying and Hobi does the only thing he can think of.
Maybe it’s just that he’s half asleep himself, or an expression of his alpha protectiveness. The ringing in his ears says protect packmate, provide for packmate, soothe.
Hobi’s scent gland brushes against yours with an electric zing. Pushing you from shaky to boneless nearly instantaneously. He drags his throat and chin across your left shoulder, and then your right.
it takes real effort for him to keep his palms pressed flat against the kitchen counter while he does it but at least it has the desired effect of banishing the last bit of sogginess from your cakey scent. Your instincts purr alphas here, alphas going to keep you safe, keep the shadows at bay.
Your scent goes sweeter and your half-asleep body goes mailable as you lean into him. Resting your cheek on his shoulder, Hobi huffs a soft laugh. It feels sort of nice, having you close like this. He knows how omega's get, Jungkook goes sleepy puppet soft when he's scent marked this close to sleep too.
Yoongi would want Hobi to do this right? Yoongi would want Hobi to comfort his mate. He’d do it himself if he was awake. Hobi’s just being a good packmate. Right?
The hair on the back of your neck stands on end as he pulls away. Is it just your imagination or is he a little reluctant?
A startled chirp bursts from your lips, and you clamp your hand back over your mouth. but hobi's laugh echoes loud off the high ceilings, "It's alright pup." You try to speak again but Hobi shushes you, there’s no need for you to push yourself. Not with him. Not right now.
The slant of the light across Hoseok’s face isn’t right. Too grey and yellow from the light in the hall. It’s too late for it to be morning yet and too dark for you to quiet your heartbeat. Hobi can feel it, jackrabbit fast against his throat.
If he's here, that means the nightmare really was only that. A nightmare. Hobi wouldn't be wrapped around you if the rest of the pack were dead. You don't need to go back upstairs and double-check.
Now if you could only stop crying.
“Here,” Hobi starts to pull away and you make a panicked sound, fingers tangling in his shirt. “I’m not going anywhere, let me just get my bag-” You shake while he’s gone, sitting on the countertop, stumbling when you get off of it, knees weak. Holding the edge until he comes and gets you with an arm under your shoulders, transferring you effortlessly to the couch.
When did Hobi get so good at this? You’d be inclined to think this was just another dream (one of those shameful ones that you don’t even mention to Yoongi) but you’re not sure you could have dreamed this up.
“Lights off or on?” You shiver so he goes one by one turning on the overhead lights and then the lamps, the ones under the cabinets in the kitchen too. There’s not a hint of shadow here, no monster that he couldn’t guard you from.
You can still see the light behind your eyes when you close them. Blinking slowly like a cat would. Hobi has his headphones in his hand, not his usual earbuds but the dilapidated black over-the-ear headphones with peeling stickers on the sides that have been his almost as long as Yoongi has (they might have been stolen from the record store- back when Yoongi's rebellious streak ran a little wider).
The second they go around your ears the world dampens and your heartbeat slows.
“I’ve got you.” Hobi mouths, reaching to pull your head to lie against his shoulder, the blue light flicker of his phone screen hurts your eyes as he scrolls through some songs and puts one on. It’s slow and soft, mostly instrumental except for faint vocals. You can’t hear what Hobi says but he pulls you to rest against his side. Settling.
He doesn’t make you talk about the nightmare. Doesn’t make you talk at all. You melt, pressing your face into his shoulder as hard as you can, your shaking relaxing with every word. Every soft hum. It’s working, your trembling is only skin-deep now. In a few minutes, you won't be shaking at all.
“Go to bed,” he asks, even though you can't hear him. Pillowed against him. The songs shift quietly. Your hand somehow gets under Hobi’s shirt and presses against the skin of his hip. Holding it softly so that he doesn’t go anywhere, it feels like a bit of a thank you.
You cling to him and he lets you. You probably can’t hear him but he still repeats, “I’ve got you.”
I’ve got you.
~-~
Yoongi’s never shot up faster in his life, leaving part of himself in the dream. He can feel the panic down the bond as he stumbles. The nest is too empty. Yoongi’s sleep-sluggish brain counts the number of bodies and he goes cold when he counts five and not seven. Pure shuddering terror bleeding down his back like he's just been doused with cold water.
Where are you? Where is Hobi? There is something wrong- something seriously wrong. Yoongi can feel it on the back of his tongue, the taste of your despair acidic. Once a familiar feeling, now lashing him like lightning.
Communicating directly through the mating mark isn’t something that happens often anymore for the two of you. It did when the bond was fresher, but now that it’s settled the connection has dulled. In the way that clothes go worn and comfortable. It’s not usually a stabbing pain like this. Such a visceral feeling that it wakes Yoongi up from it.
Yoongi stumbles to the door following your scent like a man possessed. The way it shifts from the nest. Panicked to not alone. Hobi’s panic too saturates the air. Yours is rainy wet and Hobi’s is burnt and over-sweet, faintly medicinal.
There are sounds on the stairs. Footsteps rouse Hobi just as he’s finally fallen asleep. His neck aches from how he’s been leaned back against the couch And he winces as it cracks.
“Hobi?” Yoongi calls cautiously. At his waist, your fingers tangle loosely in his shirt holding onto him like he’s a lighthouse in a storm, clinging to him even as you sleep. Hobi realizes he’s got a bit of your hair stuck to his lips. Spitting it out.
“Over here.“ Hobi’s jaw pops when he yawns. Yoongi stumbles to you because he can’t stay away when you’re like this. When you need him. You don’t rouse when Yoongi touches you, cupping your cheeks. Eyes feasting on the crusty salt around your eyes, the faint silvery shimmer of dried tear tracks across your cheeks.
“She had a nightmare- couldn’t sleep with the lights off so- thank god you're here I have to pee like so fucking bad-” Hobi says quietly.
Yoongi definitely does not eye the way that your hand stays loosely knotted in the front of his shirt, or note verbally the way that you smell like him. Drenched in hobi's scent and clinging to him.
“Daisy,” Yoongi says, sounding a bit surprised and alot in love, tucking his Hobi’s hair behind his ear. Standing over the two of you looking a little shaken. Yoongi is an expert at moving you softly detangling your hand from Hobi's shirt without waking you and freeing Hobi from his self-imposed prison.
He's still shaken when Hobi comes back from the bathroom. Hobi can’t blame him. You don’t really have the best track record when it comes to disappearing together. First the car crash last month, and now the dead body. It’s understandable why Yoongi’s panicked a bit.
But now he just looks at Hobi. Eyes scanning his face, a small smile beveling the edge of his lips.
“Stop looking at me like that,” Hobi says. The faint murmur of music is barely there, you're still asleep with his headphones on. Hobi had panic made a playlist on his phone after you’d fallen asleep. Putting only the most gentle instrumentals on it.
So what if he’d saved it with a cat emoji and a purple heart? Yoongi can’t possibly know that just by looking at him.
Yoongi doesn’t respond and Hobi tucks his chin, looking down at you, sleeping soundly still. The nightmare must have really tired you out because you're out like a light. His voice goes softer, like the emotion in his throat is constraining his vocal cords.
“What was I supposed to do? Let her panic? That wouldn’t have been kind.”
Yoongi's hand falls onto Hobi's head, rubbing through his hair. the touch feels like a reward. Hobi's not sure what for. “No- it wouldn’t have been Daisy.”
“Like it when you call me that,” Hobi says. Eyelashes flutter as yoongi scratched at the nape of his neck, head bowed. and he can hear the laugh in Yoongi’s voice. Hobi’s not really awake either.
“You don’t have to worry,” Hobi says “I’m not gonna like- freak out and run away if she needs something, like the first time.”
Hobi feels embarrassed about that when he thinks about it. Embarrassed and a little bit fond of the memory every time he sees the train ticket still in his wallet. The top edge is so chewed up that you can hardly tell it’s a ticket anymore.
“Sure,” Yoongi says and Hobi knows he hasn't fooled anyone, least of all your mate. hobi stands up properly, and when his hand falls, yoongi just tugs at his wrist, the callouses on his hands comfortably rough against hobi's skin. “Come on.”
You wake bleary for a handful of seconds when Yoongi puppets you, moving to sprawl out while Hobi discards the back cushions. Yoongi slips Hobi’s headphones off your ears and puts them safely to the side. wordless and publish while yoongi gets one of the blankets to tug it over your form.
Yoongi tuts and doesn't let hobi avoid the same predicament. although it's Infinitely more comfortable than his prior half-crunched position. If Yoongi’s being honest, it sort of looked like Hobi was guarding you. body curled over in a protective stance.
Alpha's are so funny.
Hobi ends up face-to-face with you. His flannel pj set un-buttoned to the middle tugged loose from your tugging earlier. the triangle of his bare chest presses against the bare skin of your collarbone as he shuffles away from the edge of the couch. Your own pj set pulled off one shoulder. Yoongi’s sitting up, his thigh warm against the top of Hobi’s head.
You’re running a fever maybe, worming your way closer to Hobi like you need it. Your nose presses into Hobi’s chest, a little cold at the tip and ticklish. Hobi squirms and Yoongi huffs. Overly fond.
“She does that to me in her sleep too sometimes. Means she likes your scent.” Hobi feels warm, and it’s no secret that his scent fluffs up sweeter, as if encouraging you to enjoy it. You re-settle. falling asleep with your nose tucked into Hobi's sternum.
Fuck you’re both so cute, your hair mixing colors on the pillow- sharing the same one because even being that far apart is too much. Hobi falls asleep with Yoongi combing gentle touches down his back. His favorite way to fall asleep- being touched so casually and consistently. You breathe against his skin, cradled to his chest. Sleeping soundly. Finally soothed.
Hobi watches you until sleep takes him.
~-~
Unfortunately, that’s not the last time you’re woken by a nightmare in the coming weeks
Over the next few days, it seems like more often than not Yoongi and Hobi wake to the scent of your terror in the air. Quieting your little sobs with soothing touches in the bathroom. Blankets are brought into the space so that you can curl up in the bathtub, darkness kept at bay by the overhead lights, its lingering shadow curling underneath the doorway trying to drag you down.
They don’t mind, at least they tell you they don’t mind when it eventually comes time to wake in the morning and your words are barely intact. Soft and rough in a way they haven’t been in months.
For you, it feels infuriating. Your non-verbalness might only be a temporary state but that doesn’t mean that overcoming it isn’t tiring. It’s frustrating. Working so hard each day to speak only to have it wrenched away again at night.
Always.
Always you wake up from your nightmares non-verbal. Guided to somewhere light by Hobi so that your fear of the dark won't rouse the rest of the pack. Soothed back to sleep by his music and some scenting. Waking up sometime after sunrise, struggling but better. A routine.
As for the pack…
“It feels like she’s going backward,” you hear Jin confess one morning while he brushes his teeth in the upstairs bathroom. he sounds afraid (he is afraid after waking up to you gone from the nest yet again for the 5th time this week- and it's only thursday). It's obvious Jin doesn't know you're within earshot but the double doors that lead to the bathroom are wide open.
Hobi sends you a fraught look. You’ve just come back upstairs after spending a few hours in the Living Room. You're only able to risk a few more hours of sleep because the sun is turning the sky all grey-blue.
“Do you think-” What he says next is jumbled by the sound of someone turning on the shower, Jungkook or jimin maybe (the upstairs shower is large enough that honestly- all eight of you might be able to fit given you where willing to risk any soap related injuries).
Namjoon’s answering hum is all dark thunder. jin's proposed solution a mystery. “No, I don’t think that would help.”
Sometimes it’s not just Hobi and Yoongi who wake up with you.
Sometimes it’s Jimin. Holding your shoulder with that firm touch looking like he’s about to snap his teeth at any incoming shadows. Sometimes you wake and he’s already sitting at the edge of the bed watching the stairs and the windows. Shirtless, legs splayed with his handgun balanced across his knees.
Or is it just your imagination? Is that just another dream because you certainly don’t see any weapons when he and Hobi pull you from the bed a few seconds later?
They take shifts. Jin and Namjoon blanket you on both sides, soft rumbles soothing you, their quiet banter a welcome melody in your private nest downstairs. Jungkook the next night- who admittedly just wraps his body around you and goes back to sleep so quick it makes you jealous, curled around your spine while you listen to Tae read you a late-night story.
Tae’s delicate murmur does all the character's voices just right. Her lips are both mystery and familiarity. She always seems to crack open the world with the first line.
“Look, I didn’t want to be a half-blood.”
They never make you speak; never treat you like they’re too tired even though you know they are. You can see it on their faces, on Hobi’s eyebags getting greyer by the day. Hobi’s the only one who's there every time a nightmare drags you awake. Even Yoongi doesn’t wake up every time.
(Although you confess it's more because you develop a routine. You and Hobi sleep by the side of the nesting nook, where it’s easy to get out without moving around too much. Close enough to each other that he often wakes smelling like you and you always wake smelling like him).
You try to talk with him about it. Guilt makes your heart feel all stuffy. Is it possible to get a heart cold?
“You know, you could just leave your headphones out-"
“No- don’t worry about it, I’ll just make it up later.”
Always. Always Hobi wakes and plops his headphones on your ears. Sometimes he seems awfully lively, grinning and cracking jokes when you burrow into his chest and wipe your tears on his shirt.
“I am like- among the top 10 worst sponges in history you know?”
Sometimes he wakes you from the nightmares before you’ve had the chance to jerk awake. He recognizes the tell-tale stillness, the quick breaths. He never lets you suffer for long. Waking you with a hand on your shoulder. Allowing you to shove him just a little because he knows you're just reacting to your dream and him bleeding together.
"It's just me- you're okay, I've got you."
Sometimes, you wonder if you’re not the only one who can’t sleep lately.
During the day you spend a lot of time in the nesting pod, catching up on sleep while it's still light outside. dreading the afternoons and evenings when the shadows linger like a looming storm. Alone and safe and quiet.
Occasionally you're joined by noodle, purring up against your stomach. Meowing at you until you lift your arm and he can cuddle close. Sometimes you feel like he knows you’re sadder than you say you are. That when the others aren’t there to watch you, you’re stiller, less mobile than normal. You don't even click away at your phone, half the time you forget to charge it anyway.
Hobi would never tell you- but a few afternoons ago he’d come home to Noodle waiting for him on the front step. He’d lead Hobi inside, little kitty face glaring back at him every few steps. Circling his curled form and yowling when he dared to take a second to take his shoes. off. Panicked and nervous, all but biting on his ankles before he led Hobi into the sunroom. His bushy tail held high.
There he’d meowed woefully at your nesting pod where you slept soundly. So loud that Hobi was worried it would wake you. As if he was trying to say “Aren’t you going to do something?”
Hobi had just quieted the cat with a soft shush and picked him up. Closing the door behind both of them. “Let her sleep nu,” he’d gotten nothing but a tearful meow in response. Some squirming, but no claws. “What do you expect me to do? I’m trying my hardest.”
Noodle keeps his secrets. Hobi’s question goes unanswered by the cat- who’d simply squirmed out of his hold and gone to wait by the door to be let back in. Glaring at Hobi’s retreating figure like he’d been betrayed.
Noodle seems to know something that the pack doesn't. He's sat in your lap during dinner and breakfast every single night this week, especially on the days you’ve slept more.
Hobi continues to try his hardest. He brings home flowers from the shop. He says they’re for Jin but puts them by the nesting pod and no one even bothers to tease him. He makes sure that you don’t fall out of the habit of going on late-night drives. Even though you don’t go back to the beach again quite yet. The memories there are too prescient.
Hobi takes you to the winding mountain road again. Drag racing one night with Jimin, because what good is trying to squeeze in a few hours of sleep before sunrise when you’ll just wake anyway? You might as do something fun until you’d wake up normally.
You leave that night a little more wobbly-legged than Hobi will admit to Namjoon when he asks later. "I'm never getting into a car with you again Minnie- what the fuck."
But sometimes the alphas do use the sunroom when you’re there.
It’s kind of nice to hear them on the other edge of your senses. When you’re dozing and Tae and Jimin want to play video games. their shouts of happiness and false outrage better than their screams of terror.
When Hobi and Jungkook want to do some stretching before they take an afternoon run, their giggles push out the memories of cruel words that ring in your ears. Yoga mats all stretched out and noodle perched on the edge of Hobi's multicolored one. Watching you, tail flicking back and forth.
They'll never know how much they help just by being there.
Or when they work on rearranging Hobi’s plants around. Fitting them into different spots like a jigsaw puzzle and moving them from room to room. He doesn’t mean to be indecisive about it, he’s just trying to find the best home for each of them.
They take the big banana tree upstairs to put it in the nesting room because that honestly has really good light and Hobi’s baby can’t be compromised. They move the monstera there too and switch the string of pearls for three big ferns hanging above your nesting nook. Shifting A big fig tree that honestly looks kinda pretty from the entryway to the corner, hanging part of the way over the small sectional.
A leggy orchid that someone bought Namjoon as a “thank you for not letting me go braindead” present is the wimpiest and smallest of the bunch. Hobi's in the process of rehabilitating it. For now, it sits on the window sill growing a single pathetic leaf.
Hobi tries to spend a lot of time nearby when you’re trying to sleep, he always seems to show up when you're having the hardest time ignoring your thoughts.
They're getting tired of you being a goddamn mess every time. Why can't you just get better? It's pathetic, Hobi is fine. Why are making such a big deal over this? But deep down you know it's not just the dead body that caused all of this.
Things are slow at the flower shop in the fall with only the occasional wedding until the Christmas season starts up. Hobi talks to you about it while he waters his plants and trims up some leaves that are dying. He’s definitely not looking forward to making bows for the whole month of December and wrestling with wreaths. He’d much rather talk to you about his ferns. The big stag leaf one that’s in the corner by the tv. And the big fluffy ones that hang above the nesting pod.
“I know they're messy but If I overwinter them we can hang them back on the porch next year, They looked so nice!”
You hum from the pod, turning your cheek to look up at him. he's got his flannel rolled up to his elbows, a shirt underneath that looks homey and warm. Hobi’s scent grows sweet. “They did look really cool this year, kind of like big green soot sprites.”
“We should watch spirited away again.”
“We should.”
You stretch out in the nesting pod while he fiddles with one of the fronds, pulling off the dead leaves with a crumple. You stretch your curled-up legs, toes brushing the ratan sides of the pod.
“If I was a plant where would you put me?”
“Probably where it’s sunniest.”
You can hear his smile on the words, you hum and go back to sleep while he works. Hobi checks your breathing every few minutes, just to make sure you don’t need to be woken up again.
Hobi never talks about the nightmares and never asks what they’re about. Which is something you’re thankful for as the days go on and they get worse and worse. You don’t know how many more nights you can wake up gasping without telling them what you're dreaming about. That it's the idea of them dying that has you so panicked. not to mention the nightly revision of the worst parts of your abuse.
Yoongi doesn't always let you escape without a bit of interrogation. Badgering you until you tell him that he needs to stop.
Jin’s just as bad, constantly hovering. You found your sleep schedule, an estimated hours of sleep you’ve gotten scrawled on the edge of a newspaper in Namjoon's handwriting. He's a little generous with his calculation- You know you haven't slept 13 hours in the last 4 days. You’d crumpled up the page and thrown it in the garbage.
In the morning you find out their motive behind it. Blinking down at your cereal and at the red raspberries bobbing in the milk. You can't help but get defensive about this; because really when you go non-verbal so often about this- what good would talking do?
“Jin, I’m not going to therapy.”
Jin looks a little bit less like his usually put-together form, button-up shirt a little looser than it might have been a few weeks back. Yoongi rubs down his shoulders as he passes. Work has been keeping Jin later and later- anytime someone asks he says something about a problem child at the home for forgotten pups that needs Jin's full attention.
It's so very like him to suggest therapy.
He pulls his fingers through his hair, trying to comb it into something orderly. Abandoning his usual routine of gel and mouse. “I’m not saying you have to go consistently- just once or twice, you went through something-“ he breaks off when Yoongi taps his hip, shaking his head.
You’re twisting your hands over your lap, again and again. But the word lands even though it was unsaid. Whereas before you and Hobi had a smart retort- now- the word feels less hollow, more heavy.
And Jin's not just talking about the body.
Jin doesn’t want to be frank, but you don’t look the best. Maybe it’s because you’d been so steadily getting better that they hardly remembered what sadness looks like on you. But now it looks like this; you sitting at the island counter, looking at your food, too nauseous to eat. Actually worried you're going to vomit if you try.
Any other morning, Jin would sit by you and coach you through it, would sit and wait for you and move you somewhere safe, somewhere softer to prod. He'd chase this worry with gentle touches. maybe he'd give you a gentle settling if you were feeling like you needed to reach that happy hazy head space to eat.
Any other morning Jin wouldn’t leave you.
But this morning, the clock says that Jin has exactly 20 minutes before he has to leave for work or else he’ll be late and miss the debriefing on the latest string of murders and drug-related reports. including a very well worded anonymous tip. it's important that jin's there for that.
It’s not enough time to drag you to some corner of the house and scent you happy. Or better- scruff you down into omegaspace where you’d be mailable and more agreeable under his touch.
Yoongi's eyes say, go I've got this, and Jin has never been more thankful for lovely enemies and a partner in crime.
But Jin simply does not have enough time to love you as he should. If Jin has to choose between making you feel loved and making you more physically safe he'll choose the latter every single time.
Baby steps. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and criminal empires won’t fall that quickly either.
“They’ll go away, I know they’ll go away because they did last time,” you reaffirm, only half believing it. You and Yoongi don’t talk about when you first moved into this house, but the truth is these nightmares aren’t really anything new for either of you.
At least this time they don’t come with you hurling your guts up every night. At least this time your words return in the middle of the day. At least you feel somewhat human right now.
Jin sends a fraught look in Hoseok ’s direction. Clearly requesting backup. He holds his hands up, straw in his mouth and ice coffee in his hand. “I’ll go if she goes.” Is all he says backing away. Clearly not ready to take Jin’s side with this. Late for work himself.
Jin almost misses when you guys were adversarial, rather than banded together as a unified front.
I never expected the pups to unionize
He sends Namjoon in a text a few hours later, After no less than 3 separate meetings that have him feeling more than a little tired himself.
Joonie (1:18): Really? I’d thought you would have been ready, no plans to destabilize the monarchy up your sleeve?
Jin can’t stop his smile, he’s conscious of who might be watching, so he hides it with his palm. Flirting on the FBI’s time has never felt so good.
What would you recommend?
Joonie (1:23): Spanking and sweets probably.
That at least had made Jin feel a little bit more at ease. But he knows what Namjoon really means, that he’s saying they should talk about this later face to face. Or worse there isn’t an easy solution. Namjoon had warned him that a request for therapy, however gentle and well-worded it was, might not go over well.
But what else can you do when someone won’t accept your concern? When love falls short? For the first time ever Jin is unsure what you need.
Over the next few weeks, you can tell that they’re being overly gentle with you. Treating you with velvet gloves.
Namjoon barks an order at Jungkook and Hobi when they rough house too close to you. jostling you where you stand unsteady in the bathroom. Tae lets loose a sleepy growl when Jungkook back hugs you one morning- something ordinarily innocuous but now makes you flinch hard. hand pressed over your heart to stop its thundering. Both times Jungkook tucks his tail smelling sour at being scolded even though it's really not his fault.
Everyone's instincts are running on high. Your scent is so off these days. Something about it muted and only getting duller. Jin didn't realize until the other day when he tried to find a pillow that smelled like you while nesting and couldn't.
The head of the FBI's largest organized crime task force, brought to sniffles over not being able to find the right pillow. What would Jin's enemies think?
Yoongi had only sighed, and relinquished his shirt to Jin's nesting. At least that was the next best thing.
but it's not only the little things that they're holding off from; it's sex too. You can clearly tell that they want to instigate something when you come upstairs one night after spending a few minutes with Tae in the library room.
Jungkook sat's tight across Namjoon’s lap. Moving his hips in a way that's sensual clinging to the pack alphas bare chest and licking into his mouth like an omega starved.
You know what they want to do- christen the nest in a way, truly break it in and make it smell like the pack.
But they'd stilled at your appearance and you'd made yourself scarce, clearly not ready to be asked to stay (or scarier- asked to leave). When you'd come back after showering the room had smelled of sour unhappy arousal and Jungkook had been pouting on the other side of the nest from Jin and Namjoon.
You hadn't heard the whispered argument. "You're treating her the exact same way you treated me when my seizures went bad."
"That was a different circumstance Koo and you know it."
"Still- it doesn't change the fact that you're making the decision for her instead of making a place that's safe enough for her to decide what she wants."
The idea that Jungkook and the others are holding off for your sake has you feeling even more guilty.
Even Tae- once insatiable, now hardly lifts her head from her computer when you walk into the library room wearing next to nothing. You know it’s just that. Just busyness that she's been spending every available second writing her new story.
But you can’t help but feel odd about it. Half guilty and half extra. Unwelcome.
Neglected isn’t the right word. Neglected is the word that Hobi would use for his orchid or the cactus that he accidentally forgot about outside. Two plants that are equally as finicky, opposites but maybe not in terms of difficulty. One praised for being beautiful, the other coveted for being hard to take care of.
It feels like that a lot of the time, that you're just hard to take care of. you're an adult you shouldn't even need to be taken care of at all.
That night- you toss and turn in the bed. Unable to sleep because you can't help but think about it, your thoughts a rushing torrent of you're such a bother. Maybe they're just trying to let you down easily. Maybe all of the love is a lie. You should try harder, if you try harder to overcome this then maybe they won't ask you to leave.
Sadness has rotted your brain a little, you don't know how to get back, how to stop the spiral. Until your hands are so tight that your nails dig into your palms. Leaving bloody little crescents.
The next day you try to catch up on sleep. In the nesting pod. A dark spot. Out of sight and out of mind, where all broken things go when it's clear they can't be fixed in a way that makes them useful. But it feels like you've only slept a few minutes when you're roused- not from a nightmare, but because someone gets into your nesting pod with you.
You smile in your sleep at the scent of honey, rich and golden. So nice and sweet that it makes you get goosebumps. Jungkook noses at them, dragging his cheek along the hair on your arms, soft and pleasant in that sensory sort of way.
Even though the nesting pod was a gift from Namjoon you'd been clear to Jungkook and Jin that they could use it whenever they wanted to. They're always a little bit more inclined to nest upstairs.
You sleepily hold out your arms for Jungkook, only cracking your eyes a little. You're not prepared for the sight of him in a crop top. blinking as you register it. Your pulse climbing higher. Jungkook doesn't say anything, doesn't say anything at all as he pulls his body along yours, settling mostly on top of you. quiet until you query "Kookie?"
He smells a little like the gym, but more like he'd showered there and then come home. You don't remember what day it is, what his schedule was. But the house is quiet around you, it must be one of his early days then?
His nose rubs smooth little circles along your neck, and when you pull back his eyes are a little glassy. "I miss you," he says, voice cracking a tiny bit. You don't have to ask why he misses you when you're right here. You know and your heart clenches painfully.
you laugh, "you just saw me this morning." but his lower lip wobbles, and you know thats not what he meant. it's frightfully easy to knot your fingers in his hair and pull him down to eye level. "c'm here."
You can tell by the way that Jungkook kisses you that he wants you, his arousal burning skin deep as his tongue laves against your lower lip and his hand slides down your chin to cup your scent gland, fingers pressing over the sensitive skin delicately.
You're so fucking tired.
Jungkook’s sex drive is honestly the highest in the pack, and you know that they usually keep him well tended to. But you also know that because of your predicament, no one’s tended to his needs in the last few days. You can smell it on the edge of his scent. Sweet but overly sweet, like a hovering cloud of settling perfume, unable to settle. Just getting stronger.
It’s not your job, and it shouldn’t be anyone’s job per se, but the idea of turning him down is so displeasing that you won’t even if you’re not really in the mood right now. You're so fucking tired. There isn't room for anything else. you don't have the energy to want this, you don't have the energy to want anything but sleep.
You kiss back, a little gentler than he wants, the soft needy noise he makes against the seam of your mouth tells you just how welcome it is. Your arms are sluggish as they go around his shoulders. He grins happy, and you grin too- because Jungkook’s joy is honestly so infectious. You let him tug you up, tug you out of the nesting pod even though your heart lurches.
This is your use to the pack, isn't it? The youngest omega, the lowest one in the hierarchy. You shouldn't say no and deny Jungkook what he wants. This is the way that he feels free, the way that he makes himself better.
After the pack's sleeping quarters had changed, there’d been a whole debate over where exactly to put the pack's sex toy collection and what to do with their old bedroom on the first floor. The side closet is no longer big enough or in use.
Installing some shelves in the bedroom had been the easiest solution. now they frame either side of the windows, holding Tae's overspill of books at the top and a few display cases. You remember the first day you'd wandered in here in search of your mate and found some suspicious-looking brackets installed along the ceiling studs, sawdust piles sweeper up on the floor.
“It’s totally not a sex dungeon.”
“Babe, you’re making a display for Jungkook’s dildo collection with a built-in sex bench.” At least you can still tease your mate when you're sad like this. Every little semi-normal comment you make feels like seeing the sun during a break from the storm. Even Yoongi's pout is half a smile.
“Just because I want there to be a bench doesn’t mean It’s a sex bench. It could be for like- watching tiktok and stuff. You know Hobi likes to find a spot where he won't bother us.”
“It’s totally a sex bench.”
“Is not.”
Yoongi is too fun to rile up. You'd watched him blush as you and Jungkook had playfully grabbed and swung on the ropes Yoongi was hanging, the heavy thick cotton ones soft to the touch that won’t irritate his loves sensitive skin. testing out the brackets meant for suspension.
Jungkook’s just as giggly and happy when he drags you there now, and your smile is very real pressed to his shoulder. The farthest thing from fake. it might be the first time you've smiled today. Jungkook always makes you feel this way; a little younger, a little bit like you’re sneaking around. That at least feels right.
You're very good at concentrating on the parts of sex that feel good, the parts that you want and not the ones that you don't.
(This morning the others had talked about it with Jungkook. Jimin and Tae had cuddled close to brainstorm. The way they often talk about sex things and pack things. Jimin's snorted honesty still stings.
"I don't know if Yoongi could literally fuck the sadness out of her, but at least it's a suggestion."
Jungkook had felt petulant and whiney, "But why doesn't he just try- if anyone's got a magic just right dick it's him-" Tae had chased Jungkook's disappointment with a kiss.
The truth is; the pack is mostly at a loss with how to help you this time. The most they can do is just stay close and make sure you have everything you need. But lately, not even that has felt like enough. Tae had scrapped her nails down Jungkook's abs, soothing him, with a bit of tingly pain pleasure.
"You're the only one whose bad mood can literally be cured with a good fuck bunny.”)
Yes, Jungkook is trying to make you feel lighter in the only way he knows how right now. But there are different medicines for different hurts for a reason.
Jungkook guides you down to the sex bench, tugging at your shirt a little. Still kissing you. Up close you realize it's actually more of a daybed, styled very attractively with a few throw pillows. One that's more memory foam and sturdy for propping bodies up.
It's no secret how sweet turned on happy Jungkook smells from just a little kissing, just the bare minimum. Jungkook moans- a crocked needy sound, scent pulsing richer in the air. He squirms a little bit, reaching over to one of those shelves. Rummaging in one of the frosted acrylic buckets.
“I’ve had this idea for weeks now that you've taken Joonie’s- fuck- I just- I didn’t know when you’d want to try it but I saw this video online with two omegas and Jin said no but- ha! Here it is!”
You gulp.
The big purple thing is a veritable monster, glittery and double-ended, ridged not like a regular dildo but more like a tentacle. It's about as thick around as your wrist. Namjoon’s a little thicker but still-
it makes fear trickle down your spine, warm and almost bleeding.
Jungkook reads your expression. And the disappointment crests his cheeks, his bunny smile falls, and you feel like you’ve failed already.
At the thought of being filled right now. You feel like you might want to vomit. You try not to have any sort of expression, just a small smile- but fall abysmally short. You’re too tired, too sore, too tight to properly enjoy that.
The idea that your sadness is enough to get in the way of this, what Jungkook so clearly needs is suddenly too much for you to bare. Jungkook needs sex, doesn't he? He needs it to make the seizures feel not quite so damning. He'd told you once- how much he required sex to feel loved. It's his love language right? Isn't this what people always say when they want physical touch?
Who are you to say that your needs are more important than his? You certainly do not love yourself as much as you love him.
Jungkook’s frown is heartbreaking and you easily kiss it away. Making your kisses more eager. You’re a good kisser and a good actor. Your kisses make Jungkook feel all fluttery and hot in the chest, quickly forgetting about the dildo and whatever plans he might have had.
"Just want you- don't want-" words get in the way of kissing, sucking, you mouth at Jungkook's lower lip, making him groan.
Jungkook’s scent gland is a semi-swollen little lump under your teeth as you nibble on it, making him part his legs, grinding up into nothing and letting out a breathless whine. You set yourself across his lap and his big hands quickly fist on your waist pulling you snugly.
You don’t mind this, you really don’t.
It's too routine for you, the first thing that you reach for to avoid saying no. His belt buckle is warm against your palm as you shift so that you can slide to the floor. Pulling your body away from him. he lets out a needy bereft sound. stopping you as you start to tugg at his waistband.
his cheeks are pink, lips red from kisses when you pull back. "I-"
"Let me kiss you here Koo." Let me at least do something. Let me stop feeling so guilty, I know how to fix the guilt even if you don't.
Jungkook catches your chin before you sink to the floor. Jungkook has a hickey on his abs glimmering there just along his hipline. The crop top pulled up to right under his pectorals in a way you know would have the alphas growling and mouthing at his stomach. That's probably how he got the hickey in the first place.
“But you don’t like it.” He says, not quite understanding. Catching your hand as you slide it across his knee.
“I want to try.” You lie, "I-I feel like I’ve lost practice, need to be taught how-” You bat your eyes, looking down and away like you're embarrassed. Just let me do this and make you cum. Just let me get this over with so that we can go back to cuddling and I can feel safer. Jungkook always gets especially cuddly after he's cum too. “I don’t- I don’t do it for the alphas like at all." Your stuttering isn't all faked. You’ve lost practice in a lot of things, but lying clearly isn’t one of them.
“Or Yoongi” Jungkook notes. A little too quickly.
Your heart pulses, Bruised a bit at that. You've never explicitly discussed the abuse you underwent with anyone but Yoongi and Namjoon. You didn't think anyone really noticed how much you don't like giving blowjobs. It's not that you don't want to reciprocate or touch- it's just that once with Geumjae, the choice to reciprocate was taken away from you. The choice to get anything at all was always taken away. It's hard to forget that, to want it again.
You remember his words. He'd always been violent with words before he'd ever gotten violent physically with you. Coercion doesn't feel like it has the same weight compared to that (Hobi would probably argue with you- but his case was different wasn't it?)
"You're so fucking selfish, you could help me in like- 10 minutes but you're choosing not too. We could go back to having a normal fucking evening. I do so much for you and even now when I can't fucking sleep you won't just do this one fucking thing- it's not like I'm asking for much. You're too young, I should have known you wouldn't know how normal relationships function."
It's foolish of you to think that you could be selfish forever. You should get used to this with Jungkook so that it's not so bad with the others later. In case they ever realize how selfish you've been.
“Yeah,” you swallow back a lump in your throat. “But can I? I want to-” You make your eyes wide, biting your tongue hard so that your scent doesn’t go sour.
Jungkook looks like he’s warring with himself for a second but then the hornyness wins out. He pulls his pants down his thighs and you help him, big and muscular as he stands, you on the floor before him. It feels right in a twisted way. See I know my place, see I'm not trying to get away with anything.
Jungkook almost trips when he moves to get a pillow for your knees because he’s not a monster. Namjoon and Jin have taught him well.
Jungkook is not a monster.
If you said no, if you said that you wanted to stop you know he wouldn’t hold it against you. At least not at first, at least not this time. After the 4th or 5th or 10th attempt you know that wouldn't be the case.
Jungkook doesn't even have large enough of a cock for it to feel like a real blowjob. His bunny eyes are wide and eager as you give it a first little kiss. Tentative. You kiss the head again, focusing, dragging your lips up the sides and nuzzling into the skin of his hip, indulging in his scent because at least Jungkook smells nice, smells clean, before you take him into your mouth
Geumjae always smelled a bit like piss. Tasted like it too. At least Jungkook's not like that.
He can be forgiven maybe, for not noticing right away. For not asking if you want this twice. A muted curse falls from his lips instead and he carefully cradles your head. A little startled.
"Fuck- ah-" The muscles of his abdomen tense beneath your touch, startled by the sudden influx of pleasure and the wet tight hot heat of your mouth. "I don't think you need any practice- fuck-"
Omega cock tastes less bitter than alpha cock does. And Jungkook’s dick is honestly so small you can’t even choke on it properly. He doesn’t hit the back of your throat when he rocks it into your mouth. Eking pleasure from the tight seam of your lips.
He doesn’t even hit the back of your throat or engage your gag reflex. So, you wonder why your eyes start watering. One of his hands fists (albeit a little bit too sloppy to be totally gentle) in your hair, using it to keep you stationary while he fucks your mouth. Little rolls of his hips that end in cute, "ah-ah-ah" sounds leaving his lips.
Good, you're doing good. Your nose is buried in his skin. With the little tuft of hair there, Jungkook must have showered at the gym because it doesn't smell like anything. Just breathe.
You know Jungkook doesn't get stimulation to his cock often. The others much prefer to fuck his hole rather than pay attention to it and that works in your favor now because Jungkook's so sensitive. You feel his cock jerk a little, tensing as his abdomen does, flexing up against the pallet of your mouth. Especially when your tongue teases at the head. Finding the ridge of his frenulum and pressing up.
Your lungs sting but you keep your tongue flat, lapping up at the underside, keeping your mouth wet and messy and not swallowing yet. Jungkook's precum tastes a little salty, not as salty as alpha cum would taste like but still not bad. Just a little bit like sweat and a little bit like honey.
Jungkook looks down at you, sweaty hair sticking to his forehead his lips falling slack in pleasure. Hips twitching up, looking debauched and lovely from it already. Pride swells, even as you have to fight back the urge to gag. Quieting the revulsion in your stomach through force of will alone.
You can do this, you don't have to make a big deal over it-
Jungkook tips his head back, closing his eyes, and you're free to shudder unwatched. "Fuck- just like that- you're so good at it, fuck-" You wonder if you get this same wide-eyed subspace look when you’re sad if that’s why he doesn't notice. Your knees burn, hands tighten. One on his hips the other digging into your thigh.
You hear someone outside in the hall and before you have the chance to even think about pulling off they're opening the door. Jimin almost trips, Clearly not expecting to see you on your knees or Jungkook with his legs splayed and shirt rucked up to show his tummy.
You pop off Jungkook’s cock easily, jaw aching already (you really are out of practice) Jimin’s look is all predatory, alpha pheromones bubbling up. One second startled, the next prowling in your direction like a jungle cat.
“Ah pups, getting into trouble? Pups having a treat?”
Jungkook giggles, spreading his knees wider, fingers stroking down your cheek as you catch your breath. Wiping the spit from your lips. “We’re not done yet,” he huffs. You blink up at Jimin and the touch he drops on your head is everything. Soothing your frantic panting. You push up into it, eager for a casually loving touch.
"Wanna make some trouble with us?"
“maybe, think i'd much rather watch" He teases, jutting his chin at Jungkook and settling down next to him, leaning on his chin to watch you as you're urged back to it. You kiss Jungkook's cock again as the alpha guides him into a kiss. Settling his happy-turned-on pheromones into a thick bubble that bursts.
You lap at Jungkook’s cock head, making it messy. Watching the two of them get distracted by kissing, licking into each other’s mouths. Jungkook's hand falls from your hair in favor of cupping Jimin's thigh.
And you below them, an afterthought.
You ignore the longing in your chest and go back to sucking Jungkook off. After a minute or two, Jimin's hand returns to your head, his knuckles rub against your cheek in lazy circles.
It would feel loving any other time but not right now. Not when you're trying to ignore the voice that whispers in the back of your mind that this is all you're good for. On your knees, mouth open. Finally useful. Finally worth the bother of loving. A voice that doesn’t come from any of them but sounds suspiciously like Geumjae's occupying your thoughts.
Jimin's hands are on your head too, rubbing against your cheek. Wiping away a little bit of spit on the corner of your lips. He clearly thinks you're deep in omegaspace. Interpreting your quiet softness for that sweetness and not this devastation. there is always a moment of quiet before a disaster, an intake of breath where everyone braces for impact.
“My good little princess, making your packmate happy, look at you pup,” Jimin croons. Clearly enjoying the pretty picture that you and Jungkook paint.
If anything, it's hearing that old pet name that makes you break. You're fine until you're not.
You're just so tired.
There is wetness on your face and it’s not spit or slobber or cum just tears. Little sniffles. your first one goes un-noticed by them, but not the second or the third. Jungkook freezes. And suddenly the fingers on your cheeks aren’t pulling you closer to Jungkook’s hips but off. Tilting your face. Jimin's hands quickly push Jungkooks away.
Jimin has stoney eyes, his mouth hard and discerning, lips parting. “Pup?” Jungkook’s already got his hand on your arm bunny eyes the soft opposite to Jimin’s. Jimin effortlessly transfers you from the floor to the couch. "Oh pup."
You wipe at your tears stubbornly. “Just one second, just give me a second and then I can keep going I promise, I’m fine- I’m fine” you keep repeating it, keep saying it but you smell so sour-sad. Your pout wobbles hot tears welling up threatening to spill over renewed.
But in what world would they ever let you cry during sex without pre-negotiating? In what world would they let you cry without comforting you?
“I don’t even know why I’m crying but I can't stop-”
No sooner have the words slipped past your lips are they pulling you up from the floor and into their laps, manhandled and small. You fight it a little. but Jimin crushes you to his chest and you sag. t
Jungkook has never gotten less turned on quicker, a packmate's distress takes so much precedence over this. Pulling up his pants. His pleasure isn't even a thought in the back of his mind. You take precedent.
Jungkook thought you knew that.
He feels helpless, helpless as you scrub angrily at your mouth, he uses his sweatshirt sleeve to wipe the saliva and spit from your mouth, then your tears from your cheeks. "Oh fuck- I'm so sorry- fuck I-"
And oh, you're crying into Jimin's chest now, real tears. Sobbing harder.
Jimin glances up and for a second he looks a little angry. He has every right to be angry at Jungkook for this. He's barely been here for like, a minute and a half. But the anger isn't welcome, you're too close to Jimin's scent gland, flinching when he starts to smell sour. Pulling back, so so so terrified, quivering in his lap.
"I'm sorry alpha, just give me a second and I'll get to you too-"
Now Jimin's angry for a whole new reason, angry at people he can't punish, people who are already dead. Jimin feels his anger in his hands. Struggling to stay gentle on you.
Oh fuck that.
Jimin’s fingers pinch at the back of your neck, scruffing you until your scent mellows out a little. "None of that now." He snaps, sharp shifting from concerned packmate to commanding dom effortlessly. "You'll do no such thing. You're going to stay right here until I tell you I'm done holding you."
Jimin's firmness is exactly what you need. You feel his power in his arms, crushing you, restraining you. Jungkook is not a dom, and that has never been clearer than right now. if he was than you would have never gotten into this predicament. "Can't you be good and do what Alpha asks?"
"Yes Alpha" you sob.
Jungkook looks at you guilty, eyes swimming with tears too. He's always been a sympathetic crier but he doesn’t let them spill. Even if Jimin spies them. His lower lip wobbles as he looks at you. Reaching out to hold you too and then snatching his hands back at the last second. If Jimin's touch is your remedy then Jungkook's is surely poison. “Why didn’t you-”
“I just- I just didn’t want to be bad.” You know what they’re about to say, that saying no wouldn’t have been bad but your brain is all terrified of it.
“M’sorry” Jungkook wants to say that there’s nothing you’ve got to apologize for that it’s him that should, but it’s difficult. It’s so difficult when you’re crying so hard it kinda feels like you might pass out. hyperventilating a little. He can do little more than loop his arms around Jimin's waist and trap you between the two of them, sandwiching you. Applying pressure. Holding you tight. In a way that has you instantly plummeting. Down past subspace, past omegaspace, where everything is dark and bland and nothing. Where you're nothing.
“M’sorry Koo-” He doesn’t trust his wobbly voice to speak as you sob out, “Don’t tell them, don’t tell Namjoon and Jin or Yoongi please- don't want them to worry. It’s not Koo's fault it's mine. I’m fine. m' just feeling off. I’ll be better alpha I promise.”
Luckily there is no one home. No one is home to hear any of this. Jimin has always been perilously unable to deny his girls their silly wishes. And if the idea of Namjoon or Jin knowing has you panicking anew then Jimin will take this secret to the grave.
Jimin soothes you with a happy alpha rumble, feeling exactly the opposite- wishing there was Namjoon or Jin to call for backup. This is clearly not normal crying. Jungkook surely couldn't have put you into subspace but somehow you're dropping. Leaning in to every word that graces Jimin's lips like you need the absolution he brings.
“But you’re already so good for us pup- already so good for saying no even though it was hard. Here. Lie out so we can hold you. Here.” It's what you wanted from the beginning someone close by enough to touch enough to cuddle.
Only this time it feels even less like you deserve it.
You make yourself as small as you can. Jungkook and Jimin alternate, kissing off your cheeks. Until you stop crying and fall asleep. Crying yourself back to sleep. You really were just sleep-deprived.
Jimin's got one arm around your waist, another cradling the back of your head. And only once he's absolutely sure that you are completely asleep does he hiss over the top of your head.
"Jungkook What the hell-"
"I asked, you know I asked. She said she was okay I swear-"
A whispered argument ensues, drawn out until the others come home. Their anger quieting at the sound of them, Yoongi softly calls your name. Mindful of the fact you could be sleeping.
When you wake up around dinner time you're non-verbal and pupish. There are too many people around for Jungkook to be able to pull you to the side and ask, to just talk this out. He watches you close at dinner, watches and waits for a chance to talk to you that won't come. You'll pretend you're asleep tomorrow when he wakes, just to avoid it for a little while longer.
If the others notice anything strange with you at dinner time no one broaches it. Of course, you don't speak at all. Answering their questions with shaken heads and careful nuzzles under Tae’s chin where you sit side by side with her. Your chairs pulled together so that they’re more of a bench. She smells so good- so Rosey that you press your face into her shoulder to avoid the other's eyes.
Never mind the fact that you don't smell like anything at all. Maybe you're dissociating too bad to smell like anything. So disconnected from your emotions that you can't feel them let alone smell like them.
After dinner you take an extra long in the shower so that by the time you exit the bathroom Jin has already scruffed Jungkook sleepy. He looks cute too. Pouting in his sleep, restless.
There's an extra soft nesting space carved out just beside him that he made special for you with a few pillows and his favorite nesting things. It will go unused.
That night, you don't bother trying to sleep.
~-~
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Upstairs floor plan:
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Chapter playlist:
Noah Kahan - Call your mom
Coldplay - Sparks
nick cave and the bad seeds - O' children
Pine Grove- Need too
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aperrywilliams · 1 year
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More Than You Know (Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader)
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(Not my gif. Credit to the creator)
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Author Masterlist
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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader.
Summary: You’re Spencer's best friend. You have gone through many things together, but after Spencer is incarcerated, things turn different for both of you. Not to mention you have been in love with him for a long time too. How much will you endure until you can’t take it anymore?
Word Count: 5.9k
TW: ANGST. Strong language. Mention of abduction, drug use, getting shot, death of relatives and loved ones, jail, pregnancy, unsafe sex, and potential cheating. All the deal!
A/N: Not a happy ending, at least for Spencer and Reader. Do you think they could have a chance in the future? (I wrote it as a one-shot, but it makes me kind of sad). Let me know what you think.
Part 2: More Than You Say
Part 3: More Than You Expect (the end)
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I don’t have the habit of arriving early at work. I only do it when it is strictly required. I’m not a morning person. I have never been. So you can guess how my mood turns dark when people push me to let go of some minutes of my precious morning sleep, even when Spencer is the one who asks me to.
He called me this morning at 6 am, telling me he needed to talk to me in person. So we agreed to grab a coffee in our usual place before work.
"Thanks for coming," Spencer greets me when I arrive. A harsh expression adorns his features while I sit in the booth before him.
I can’t help the yawn escaping my lips.
“Did I have a choice?” I ask, gesturing to the barista for my regular order.
“I need to talk to you,” he prefaces, rubbing a hand over his eyes. He looks distressed. I narrow my eyes, thinking about what could be causing it.
“Yeah, that’s what you said by phone when you woke me up this morning. Why you didn’t tell me there what’s going on?”
“I couldn't tell you by phone,” he excuses himself as the barista approaches and hands me my coffee. I thank her, returning my gaze to my friend.
My mind starts racing with possibilities, and my heartbeat picks up its rate.
“Something happened to your mom?” I ask cautiously. Spencer shakes his head immediately.
“No. My mom is okay.”
Well, that discards a big issue so that I can breathe a little.
“Nightmares again?”
I can recall how bad nightmares could be for Spencer. Since Hankel and passing by Emily’s dead, Maeve, and then prison, Spencer is a lightning rod for nightmares.
“No. Not in a while.”
Good. Another bad thing out of the list.
“Headaches?”
A big issue that worsened after Doyle stabbed Emily and led Spencer to Maeve.
“No. I’m good with that.”
Okay, I’m running out of options here. Is it the job?
“The bureau wants you to take longer sabbaticals?”
“No! Not that either.”
I give up. I don’t think anything is important enough to make me be here before 7 am.
“Spencer, I’m lost. Just tell me what’s going on,” I urge, running out of patience and dying to know what this is about.
"It's about Alison," he clarifies, and I can’t help but groan.
Seriously? The problem is a girl?
"Alison?" I ask, cocking an eyebrow.
"Yeah, the girl I'm seeing lately?" He adds to help my recall. I know Alison, but I won't waste a chance to mess with Spencer, especially considering he made me up early for this.
"I'm sorry. I don't remember that one. I lost track after Lonna," I shrug. Spencer rolls his eyes, knowing what I’m doing.
"Not now, (Y/N). This is important,” he scolds.
I look at him incredulously. What could be so important about a girl he's seeing?
"Okay, okay. Don't be so dense. What happens with the gorgeous Alison?" I ask, sipping my coffee.
"She may be pregnant," he suddenly says with a grimace.
"What?!" I squeal, almost choking on the coffee in my mouth. Spencer looks around us to see if someone is listening to our conversation.
"Shush! You wanna me repeat what I just said?" he whisper-shouts.
"Come on, Spencer. You must be kidding me.”
I take a napkin to clean the mess I made with my coffee.
“I’m afraid I’m not.”
“How come you, from all the people, don't know what birth control and condoms are?"
Spencer's cheeks flush. He is embarrassed, but his need to confide in someone is greater.
This is eating him alive.
"May I forget to use one a while ago? I mean, we were in a rush, and-" I cut him off.
"No. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to know the details of your sex life. I'm just concerned about how reckless you have become, honestly.”
The last part isn’t intended to sound that rough. Spencer is a grown man who can do whatever he pleases with his life, but I‘m worried about him. Since prison happened, he has been stumbling and making poor decisions, including fooling around with women.
Spencer's gaze drops to the floor, just like a child being scolded by his parents. I hate to see him like this. I hate to see him hurting and lost. So I recant my grown-up role this time.
"Spencer, look at me." I pause until his eyes meet mine. "I'm sorry if it was harsh; I'm just worried, okay? Now tell me, Alison told you?"
He shakes his head.
"Not directly. But she told me she's been feeling sick, and this morning I - I heard her throwing up. And I am almost sure she didn't have her period last month," Spencer recounts each fact as his breathing picks up.
Great. A panic attack is what I needed now.
"Hey, hey. Just breathe, okay?" I urge, calling his attention. He nods and slowly does what I say.
After a minute, he starts to feel better to speak.
"What should I do?" Spencer groans, with both hands grabbing his head.
In a twisted way, I found the scene comical.
Spencer is asking me what to do. To me.
I mean, what could I even tell him? He's my friend, but this is far ahead of what I could advise someone for.
Let alone someone who I have feelings for.
Yeah. That's the hard truth.
Cliche as it sounds, I have feelings for my best friend. A man who will never reciprocate those feelings. That's how fuck up the situation is.
But after years of keeping that secret, I learned how to mask everything for the sake of our friendship and our jobs.
"For starters, we don't know if she is pregnant. Maybe it is just your paranoia. We must be sure, so you must ask her," I instruct. Spencer looks at me in horror as if I just said he needed to jump from the 20th floor.
"What? No! I can't do that!"
"You can, and you will. You can't keep stressing out about something you don't even know!"
"And what if she is? I should marry her?" My eyes widened at that.
And the people call him a genius.
"Spencer, don't rush to the next town when you haven't stepped in this one first. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. You both need to talk and decide if things turn that way, okay?"
He lets out a deep exhale.
"Okay. Okay. You're right."
Even if I want to slap him right now, I know I will never do it. Squeezing his shoulder affectionately, I let out my following words.
"You'll figure it out. Whatever it is, you'll know what to do, and I'll be by your side, okay? You're not alone."
Spencer looks at me with gratitude and a hint of relief. He knows I’m genuine in my statement. He knows I’ll be by his side no matter what.
It always has been that way.
We joined the team almost at the same time. While Jason Gideon recruited Spencer, Aaron Hotchner recruited me. Gideon insisted that Spencer’s brain and knowledge about everything would be an enormous asset to the team. Hotch did the same with me, pointing out how my interpersonal skills and impressive field experience would be valuable to the job. Different reasons, same outcome: being the newest made us closer. And not a long time after, we became best friends.
I was there when Spencer got abducted by Tobias Hankel. I was there when he struggled with his drug addiction. I consoled him when Gideon left and then when he died years later. I cared for him when he got shot in the knee and neck. We cried together when Emily ‘died.’ And after what happened to Maeve, I was there for all steps on the way. The last straw was Mexico and the three months in Millburn. I never missed a visit, and I was by his side when he had to talk to Cat Adams.
And the same way I have been for him, he has been for me. A few months after I joined the team, I got shot in the shoulder, and Spencer helped me a lot. He rode the ambulance with me when I got shot again in the abdomen three years later. He was with me when my dad passed away. Spencer comforted me when one of my long-term boyfriends dumped me. He took a serious role in rooting for me whenever I doubted myself in the job and life.
We know each other like the palm of our hands.
Everybody would have thought our friendship was forged to everlast. And I‘m still adamant about making it that way, even if after a few years of knowing each other, I realized I‘m in love with Spencer. How could I not?
Even at some point, those feelings could have been reciprocal. I noticed things between us changed after Hotch and Morgan left the team.
The stolen glances, the little touches, the overprotectiveness, the subtle flirting. I indulged myself with the idea that it was a natural turn to us be more than friends.
But then Mexico happened.
And things changed for Spencer and me.
The moment we understood what happened and that Spencer would be locked until we could find who did this to him, I didn't rest. I didn't sleep. I barely eat. But I put a brave face on him. I knew he was having the worst time there, so I was who encouraged him every chance I got.
But it didn't matter how hard we tried, how hard I tried. Spencer locked himself and didn't let anyone in. The day he was released, I hugged him first and felt some normalcy. He said how much he missed me, how much he missed us all.
Things went well for a while, but I could tell Spencer wasn't okay. He talked less; he looked distant and disaffected. Sure, Spencer was trying to cope with everything. And as before, I tended my hand to him to hold. And in a way, he took it, but not how it would help him heal.
Our relationship turned instrumental, at least for him.
He started failing in the job, lying to Emily about his whereabouts when he ran late. His mind was distracted more often. If he was reckless at the job before, now it was worse. He snapped more too. And for every time, I was there to cover him up. That's how everyone assumed he was still finding his balance, but I wasn't so sure.
Things worsened when Spencer discovered sex was an excellent way to release frustration. At first, I didn't think it could be a big deal. Getting laid wasn't a big deal. Not ideal for me, but I suppressed my jealousy for his sake. I would choose his well-being ten thousand times before my stupid love for him.
Still, things have not improved. Almost a year after Millburn, Spencer keeps stumbling, getting into trouble, and does not act as he should. I know I have my responsibility quote, but I'm too involved in this cycle to break it.
I want to say at least I have my friend, but that isn’t entirely true. Every time I have needed him in the past year, he hasn't been there. I could tell he hadn’t even noticed I had been losing weight or the doctor’s appointment I had to attend for feeling sick.
I’m alone by myself. It's sad, but I can’t force him. I’m not like that. I would never beg for affection from anyone who doesn’t want to give it, even if I needed it. People would say it is the wrong way, but I cannot be otherwise.
Some days after our coffee shop conversation, Spencer rushes to my desk to tell me the ‘good news.’ False alarm. Alison isn’t pregnant.
Spencer looks relaxed and relieved. Maybe it’s the wake-up call he needs to slow down. My hope is short-lived, though, because while he tells me everything, his phone ding. A smirk appears on his face when he sees the incoming text.
“What is it?” I ask, and Spencer bites his lower lip.
“I have a date,” he answers, typing on his phone.
“With Alison?” I narrow my eyes. He looks at me when he’s done sending the message.
“No! Of course not. I’m not going to make the same mistake again. I told her I needed time to think,” he explains like he’s talking about the weather.
“So you’re going to meet another girl without breaking up with Alison?”
“You can’t break up with someone you’re not officially involved with,” Spencer shrugs.
I want to kill him right now.
“God, Spencer. What are you doing?”
The question is primarily rhetorical, but Spencer answers nonetheless.
“Living, (Y/N). I’m living for the first time in my life.”
Can I argue with that logic? Sure. There is so much I can tell him. But I’m tired. Spencer doesn't see or hear reasons. Not even from me. It seems I have lost the privilege of being listened to by him.
Since that talk, I can’t stop thinking about what I am doing. Am I clasping onto something it doesn't exist anymore?
I don’t know the answer, and I don’t know if I want to get one. I’m just holding until I can’t do it anymore.
And that's how time flies. Things look relatively the same, and I'm just trying to float so I don't drown.
We just ended a gruesome case in Arizona. Our jet landed an hour ago, and everyone is in the mood for a drink. Rossi and Matt are the only ones with excuses to go home early.
Once there, Penelope grabs Luke’s hands and drags him to the dance floor. JJ offers to get us some drinks. Emily volunteers to help her.
Spencer is quiet, looking at me, but I barely notice. My mind is elsewhere.
“Are you okay?” He asks. The question takes me by surprise. In the past weeks, we haven’t talked that much.
“Yeah. Good. The case, you know?”
Spencer nods, but I see the worry lingering.
“You know you can tell me anything, right?”
I want to say I believe him, but I don’t. It’s been months since I felt that close to him. But even if I don’t believe him, I may voice my concern again.
“I don’t know,” I preface, and Spencer’s attention is full on me. It's weird, to say the least, but I will take the chance. “There is this thing bugging me. About our-” I can’t end my idea before the sound of someone squealing ‘Spencer!’ reach our ears.
The man in question snaps his head up. It's Alison. Before I can say anything, he stands, and after mumbling a ‘sorry,’ he goes to the girl calling his name.
There it goes. Nothing. Again.
I sigh before sipping my drink. What was I hoping, anyway?
JJ and Emily return to our table and ask for Spencer. Not even looking behind, I gesture to my back. They understand.
We set for drinking and complaining about whatever comes to mind. I know they know, but they are respectful enough not to push me.
The night is progressing, and I enroll in conversation with Luke and Penelope when they return from their dancing. After they leave, Emily cracks jokes to make me laugh, and JJ does her best to lose a little.
The sound of glass crushing gets our attention to the bar. There he was. Spencer is between two girls who are arguing about something. I recognize Alison, but not the other one.
“Ups. Someone is in trouble,” Emily mused. JJ shakes her head in a disapproving mood. I see Spencer’s eyes darting between the girls and trying to soothe the argument, failing miserably.
I ponder my options. I can leave him to deal with his mess for once or give him a hand. Emily reads my mind.
“Are you sure?” she asks. I shrug, standing from my spot.
“I wouldn’t like to see him complaining because one of those girls broke a bottle on his head.”
I stroll to where the action is happening, morphing my annoyed look into a confident one.
"Hey baby, I was looking for you!” I chirp, using the most loving voice as my arms wrap around Spencer’s torso.
The girls don’t look happy with my intrusion.
"We were talking with Spencer," Alison says as if I don't know that.
"Yeah, he was about to explain who he’ll choose between us," the other girl adds.
If I could have rolled my eyes, I would do it. Are they that naive? But they have a point: maybe Spencer would do what they want under pressure, even if he doesn't like it. That's why I‘m here. I know him.
"I'm so sorry, girls, but you got it wrong. This man is mine, and believe me when I tell you, you should be walking away right now. You don't want to mess with me, his wife, and the mother of his child waiting for us at home, right baby?" Now I talk to him.
Spencer's mouth goes agape, even more than Alison's and the other girl's.
"Your what?!" Alison yells. Her eyes are a few inches to pop out of their sockets.
"You have a child?!" The other looks as shocked as Alison.
Spencer only stutters incoherent words. They aren’t needed, though. After cursing him and letting out a bunch of expletives, both girls stomp out of the bar.
That’s when I notice I still have my arms around him. I pull away and clear my throat.
"You're welcome," I say before turning into my heels.
Spencer wraps my wrist to stop me. His eyes are curious, examining my features as if reading me. I return an annoyed look.
"What?"
"Why did you do it?" He asks as if he is really intrigued by my actions. It may feel more natural for me than for him.
"To save your ass? Come on, Reid. They would have eaten you alive," I scoff. Spencer chuckles, knowing that it is what could have happened.
"Yeah. But why you saved my ass? You could have feasted with the scandal."
I shrug. For a second, it crossed my mind just to be honest and give him a piece of my mind. But it‘s dangerous territory, so I opt for the safer way.
"That's what the friends are for. Even if you deserve being kicked in your ass sometimes," I try to sound light like it isn’t a big deal.
"Friends, uh?" Spencer points, mulling my words. I don't know why that specific word interests him, but I don’t read into it. "Well, thank you, then."
Now he is grinning as if a heavy weight has been lifted from his shoulders.
"You're going home?" I ask, thinking Spencer only wants to disappear from the bar after the recent events. He narrows his eyes and shakes his head like I’m talking nonsense.
"No. Not when I'm free to have a good time, at last."
"What?"
"Do you see those girls over there?" He points with his look to a group of women giggling and drinking on the opposite side of the bar.
My stomach drops to my feet as I look at him in disbelief.
"Are you fucking kidding me right now?"
"To you? I would never. You're my best friend. Thanks again," Spencer says warmly before kissing my cheek and strolling to the group he has spotted.
And here I am, standing in the middle of the bar, with words stuck in my throat and the feeling that the last 10 minutes hadn't even happened. The bartender stares at me with that empathetic look that reflects more pity than anything else. I look back at him and ask for a drink. Since I’m there, I won’t waste the chance of alcohol replacing the burning I already feel in my stomach.
"Don't tell me. You saved his ass just to let him have the chance to screw it up again," Emily summarizes when I return to the table with my drink. Both have seen all the action in the bar that transpired a while ago.
"That's what the friends are for, right?" I mockingly parrot my own words. JJ scoffs.
"I don't doubt your loyalty to Spence. But don't you think it's too much? I mean, you cover him in all your capacities, and he's not taking any responsibility for his actions," she proffers. Emily nods in agreement.
"He has been through a lot. He's lost and needs help," I argue, sipping my vodka.
"We know that. But it's time Spencer takes the reign of his life. Also, it's time you focus on your own," Emily says, pointing her index finger at me.
"What do you mean?" I ask defensively.
And there are again the pity looks.
"We know you have feelings for him. That's more than friendship, we can tell. But it's not going anywhere, and you know it. When was the last time you dated, uh?" JJ questions. Her words stab me right in my chest. I let out a deep sigh.
"Exactly." Emily seconds. "You need to think about what's healthy for you. That doesn't mean you don't care about Spencer, but he must figure it out himself."
As a cue, I turn to look at the bar direction. Spencer wraps his arm around a girl's waist, his lips ghosting her ear, whispering God knows what but making the girl giggle.
JJ and Emily are right. I’m not genuinely helping him. It is just the faint hope that I could make him see me. Really see me.
After another drink with the girls, I decide to go home.
And I decide it is time to let him go.
But honestly speaking, what does that mean? It's not that feelings can disappear overnight. It's not that one day you wake up and say, "That's enough." At the end of the day - feelings aside - Spencer is my friend, and he trusts me even in his darkest moments. But the girls are right when they say friendship goes both ways. It doesn't work if he can't respect my boundaries.
So I went over my limits. What am I willing to tolerate, and what am I not? In the first place, I won’t cover him up in lies in front of the team anymore. If he has to take a scolding from Emily for being irresponsible, so be it. Second, I won’t put up with being the go-to person for any of his mess with women. And finally, I’m not going to justify his behavior to anyone. If anyone has a problem with him, they should tell him directly. I would no longer be an interlocutor between Spencer Reid and the rest of the world.
It didn’t pass long before those limits were tested again.
Some days after what happened at the bar, I arrived at the BAU for a new case. We scheduled the meeting in the conference room at 9:00.
It’s 9:05, and Spencer still has yet to arrive. As expected, everyone is asking me what happened to Reid. I shrug. At the same time, Spencer texts me, saying he is running late and asking me to say he had a problem on the subway. I know it isn’t true, so I pretend I never got the message. That brought him explaining himself to Emily when he arrived all disheveled at 9:30.
Things like that keep happening. Spencer keeps showing up late for work and lies about the reasons. Sometimes he is nowhere to see in the bullpen, only to reappear with his hair untamed and his shirt partially untucked. Those times, opposite to the previous ones, I don’t tell him to fix himself.
Not to mention the number of calls and texts he has sent me in unholy hours to ask me what he should do about his new conquers. Calls and texts I start to ignore. That last behavior is what he resented the most, I could tell.
One morning he shows up at the conference room where I’m checking a stack of files scattered over the table. The rest of the team minding their own business downstairs.
"Are you mad at me?" He bluntly asks. I raise an eyebrow, looking at him from my manila folder.
"No. I'm not,” I reply, unbothered. But if I know Spencer enough, he will not be satisfied with my answer.
"Yes, you are. You have been avoiding me. Last night I called you, and you didn't answer."
He is the one mad at me. Or at least upset. Which one was it? It doesn’t matter; he feels ignored, and he hates it.
"I was sleeping,” I answer with the same flat tone. That spurs more of his anger.
"That's not true. You don't hit the pillow before 1 am!"
Well, Spencer does pay attention, at least for that kind of thing. Months ago, I would have felt flattered. Now? It feels void and just to his service.
"Maybe last night I did."
Spencer scoffs this time.
"I don't think so. I know you (Y/N),” he defies. Maybe he thought I would bite the bullet and apologize for ignoring him.
"Whatever. Why you called me, anyway? Did you want to tell me how your new girl screamed your name in bed?" I deadpan.
Spencer’s eyes widened.
"What?! No! I- I just,” he pauses. “I just wanted to talk to you!"
“Why?” I interject.
I’m so tired of this. I’m tired of the real reasons why Spencer needs me.
His face flushes, thinking of his following words.
“I - uh. We haven’t talked in a long time. Our last movie night was a month ago. And you haven’t called me either. I miss you,” he mumbles.
I huff a laugh. Does he really think I would believe that?
“You see me every day here, Reid,” I say with the same monotonous tone, returning my gaze to the file I’m reading.
Reid. That should have been the sign he searches for, even if his mind isn’t clear enough to put two and two together.
He scoots closer, softly bending down the file in my hands.
“(Y/N), hey. Please, talk to me. Don’t let me in the dark,” he pleads. I turn my gaze away from him. The sadness and the anger boil inside. It’s exhausting.
“I'm sorry. Whatever I did, I’m sorry. I want to fix it. Tell me what it is,” Spencer insists, this time with a hand over mine.
I glance at him in silence. Could a look be enough to convey everything stuck in my chest? Years ago, it could have worked with Spencer. The friendship we had back then was stronger enough to make that happen. Just a look, and each one knew what the other was thinking. Now it is just noise that could or not mean something.
How he looks at me now, lost in the signs I‘m giving him and eager for me to say something, tells me what I already know. I wonder if I would let it out this time or bottle it up again.
“I’m just tired, you know?”
My mouth works on its own accord. My brain isn’t able to stop it. Spencer examines my face looking for something to anticipate what could be coming. His clueless is irritating.
“I’m tired of hoping you can realize how badly you hurt yourself—and waiting for you to do something about it,” I blurt, knowing this is not what he wants to hear.
“What do you mean?” He asks, leaning back in a defensive mode.
“You know exactly what I mean. You are failing yourself, Spencer. You still can’t stand your ground. And you keep ignoring it!”
I punctuate my statement by shoving the file over the table. Spencer gets startled by my action.
“If you are talking about what happened the other night in the bar. It doesn't -” He explains, but I cut him off.
“No! It's everything! Can’t you see it? It's the way you lie to your teammates, the way you do your job, like it doesn't matter to you. The way you turn everything into something meaningless. The relationships you have, your job, your friends. Everything!”
Spencer’s face steels. I know he doesn't like being called out. He hates that. But I wouldn’t spare him the trouble this time.
“You are being unfair (Y/N),” he says with gritted teeth, standing to put some distance from me.
“Am I? Oh, no. If something I’m sure of is the unfairness doesn't fall on me.”
I spit back, standing as well to show him I wouldn’t back off. After running his hands through his hair, he turns to me. He has a look of betrayal on him.
Betrayal? The audacity of this man.
"Yes! You are! You, better than anyone, know it hasn't been easy for me! Life - life in Millburn changed me, and it has been so difficult to settle it down. You know that! Those were the worst three months of my life!"
Millburn. It was like a prohibited word for us. He didn't like to say it or hear it from me.
"So that gives you the right to ruin the good things in your life, uh? Because you are a lost soul in this world?” I try to reason, but that only gives me a burlesque laugh from him.
"And what if it were so? It's not like I have much to lose, right?"
And there it is—the broken man. The guy who still believes no one loves him and he doesn't deserve to be loved. All the years of work to put those walls down returned to zero after he got imprisoned.
"Do you really believe that? Do you really believe your self-destructive behavior only affects you? I didn't think you were so selfish, Spencer."
Although I know the answer, I ask nonetheless. And even though I know that selfishness isn’t something Spencer deliberately wants, maybe voicing it could help me to bring him back.
“Selfish? Says the person I trusted with my life, and now it’s throwing everything back to me?”
Or not.
“Stop doing that! Stop assuming everyone is attacking you! If we need to blame someone, of course, we can blame Cat Adams. But now she’s dead, Spencer! And what about you? For God’s sake! You had endured so much in your life, and now you’re going to let that bitch keep destroying you from the grave?”
My voice gets hoarse from the yelling, and for the first time during this conversation, Spencer doesn't spit something back immediately.
The hurt expression on his face morphs into defeat. He doesn't want to fight back. He doesn’t want to get out of the hole.
We keep looking at each other silently, daring the other to say anything.
Spencer tries to mask his glassy eyes, breaking eye contact and looking at the ceiling. And seeing him like this spurs the desire to run and hug him, holding him. But I can’t. I swore not to back down.
“I’m sorry, (Y/N). But this is who I am now,” he mumbles after a few minutes.
I exhale sharply. Why is it so difficult for him to understand?
“Keep telling yourself that, but deep down, you know it's not true,” I argue, but with no energy to keep yelling. But it's like fuel to Spencer’s anger.
“Why do you care anyway? Is it because you are my friend?” He mockingly air quotes the word ‘friend.’ “Well, it seems my friendship doesn't satisfy you anymore, does it?”
I pinch the bridge of my nose, closing my eyes.
“Don’t say that.”
“Why not? You are not comfortable with the person I am. You don't want my company anymore. You don’t trust me. It's very clear to me.”
I need to get out of here before I say something I may regret or Spencer does it burying any chance of us being okay again.
“Where are you going? Doesn’t feel okay hearing the truth, (Y/N)?”
“You are angry, and we can’t keep talking like this,” I mumbled, trying to pass to the exit door.
“Are you chicken out now? That's how you understand loyalty?” Spencer calls me out this time. He’s testing me, and I can’t take it anymore.
“Don’t question my loyalty. If anything, loyalty is what you have been getting from me since always! Don’t you dare to doubt it!”
My voice is going to break at any minute, and I don’t know what to do to push away this suffocating feeling.
”Let me have suspicions about that,” he scoffs, and I want to cry.
How unfair. How painful.
“Oh no, no, no. Not that. You know what? I’m done. Fuck you, Spencer! Fuck you and your fucking cluelessness and self-loathing. I have been by your side in thick and thin. I have given you everything!”
I bet my screaming is being heard throughout the entire floor right now, but I don’t fucking care. I’m not going to stop right now. “God! Even I would have died for you! But you don’t deserve anything of it. You don’t deserve my loyalty and much less my love.”
I notice how Spencer’s eyes widen with my last sentence.
“Your what,” he barely mumbles.
The secret is out. But it's too late. I pinch the bridge of my nose and take a deep breath.
“Yes. You heard right. I said, ‘My love.’ Because I fucking love you. I have been in love with you for ages! But I chose our friendship above all, and what I got? A friend who can’t see beyond his shit. Hell, everyone’s right. I deserve better!”
I can’t stop the tears from springing, and I hate myself for not being stronger to endure this.
“(Y/N)… why you didn't tell me?”
He's being cautious and slowly tries to approach, reaching for my hand.
“Don’t fucking touch me!”
“(Y/N),” he tries again. “We can talk about this, please.”
I hate this. I don't want his pity. Honestly, I don't want anything at all. I thought saying the truth would help me to lift a weight from my shoulders. Now I just want to run anywhere in the world where nobody knows me. I’m sick, and being by his side, in any capacity, would no do better to me.
“No. We can’t. Too little too late, Spencer. I’m done. I really hope you can find whatever you're looking for. I hope you do. You deserve to be happy. And so do I. Take care, okay? And I’m sorry for lying to you. I told you I’ll always be by your side, but I can’t. Not like this.”
I look at him for the last time, patting his shoulder and giving him a sad smile. He doesn't say anything; he only stands there, following my steps with his gaze until I reach the door and shut it behind me.
——————
Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine​ @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @tvandfanfic​ @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @disaster-in-waiting @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger
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khuzena · 7 months
Text
Just a coworker
Dr ratio x g/n! reader (i tried)
Part 1, Part 2
cw. angst, super slow burn, they eventually get tgt, hurf/comfort, jealousy brr, reader is unhinged, mentions of drugs, kinda cringe but who cares I've written worse, not proofread, dr ratio is a pussy
a/n: i js wanna say fck SCHOOL FOR GIVING ME 6 PROJECTS DUE TOMORROW. THIS FIC IS MEH BUT TRUST IT GETS BETTER (hopefully…)
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Veritas Ratio is a lonely man. Only having his books and his sculptures as friends— regarding the rest as no use for him.
Up till now, you've been nothing more than the pest who waves hi at him every morning, bringing him coffee every now and then. You must be scheming something, there's no way someone could ever be this nice without asking for a favour.
“Dr ratio!”
The alabaster headed man stared at you, even with that stone head of his, you can clearly feel his piercing gaze.
“What is it?”
Veritas groans in annoyance, what is it again?
Lately, you've been struggling to teach this subject. As well-versed you were in topics such as literature, history and the likes, it was true that you were above average with maths.
“I've been tutoring this kid after classes and well…”
He doesn't move, just listening intently.
“He's been asking about quantum mechanics and I don't know much about the topic so…”
“so?”
so?
“I was wondering if you can teach me it.”
God damn it, he has better things to do.
“Then read a book about it”
His eyes were trained on your figure as he saw you tense, just why him of all people?
“Dr ratio, just this once. I just need to learn the basics once and I won't bother you again!”
He closed his codex and turned the other way, ready to walk away from conversation.
“I have better things to do than humouring your foolish antics—”
“Please.”
Your hands fidget nervously as he paused before looking back at you, pondering whether to do you a favour.
“I'll think about it.”
By the time you blinked, he was gone.
The next day passed, you were at his door, clutching your teaching materials as you waited for veritas’ class to end.
He scrunched nose as annoyance rose in him like a tide, he could see you waiting at the window and checking the time every now and then.
“That ends our discussion for today.”
His voice echoing on the walls as the bell rang, his students already out the door.
After a good 10 minutes, most of the students were out the door as he was left alone with himself (+ those eyes of yours that never seem to leave him alone)
“It's rude to stare.”
His comment caught you off guard, the corners of your lips twitching nervously as you hid behind the wall again— shit, he caught you staring…
Veritas let out a sigh before cleaning his desk of the sparse test papers he's collected last week.
A moment of silence passed before you mustered up the courage to enter the spacious room, it was… quiet to say the least.
“Dr. Ratio—”
“I'll tutor you but with one condition.”
Sweat trickled down your forehead as you nervously anticipated what he's about to say. (Did I mention he paused to rile you up?)
“You,”
A click on his cabinet was heard before he turned at your direction to get a better look at you.
“That I won't have to tutor you again next time, just this once”
It was odd, a teacher asking for tutoring from a fellow teacher? It wasn't uncommon but it certainly irked him of the thought. You could just read a book about it but you'd rather take his precious hours in his day for something you could do yourself.
You let out a sigh of relief.
“whew… I thought you were going to refuse.”
“Do you want me to?”
You shook your head no, gripping your satchel tightly.
“Tomorrow at the faculty room after classes—”
When you blinked, he was already behind you. Was he a magician or something?!?
“—Don't be late.”
Then, the door closed abruptly, now it was only you in the room.
The next day, classes already ended and you cleaned up your desk to get to the faculty room.
As you slid the door open, he was already waiting for you.
“What're you doing?”
Veritas moved another chess piece on the board, eating the white team's queen.
“What does it look like I'm doing?”
Why can't he just be nice for once?
“Whatever, so… do we start reviewing?”
You pulled the chair opposite to his and sat down. He didn't reply, only tapping his feet.
“Your turn.”
“Do I just?—”
“Just move a piece.”
Fine then. There were barely any pieces left on the board, leaving you with no other choice as you hid your king at the corner of the board.
“Checkmate.”
There was a visible annoyance on your face, making veritas chuckle.
“Seriously? When are you going to start tutoring me? I came here to learn something— not some stupid chess game”
“First of all, chess isn't stupid”
Before you knew it, veritas flicked your forehead.
“Second of all, learn patience.”
“ow!”
Veritas hid away the board and grabbed all the books needed, pulling out some notes and highlighters for you.
“Read”
The man in front of you flipped the pages and pointed at the highlighted paragraph for you. Was he making you read out loud? Were you 10 or something?
“Do I really have to?”
His fingers tapped aggressively on the board, his patience was thinning and you weren't even past the first page yet.
“Just do it.”
Who could've guessed two hours later you would be in tears, notes sprawled all over the table and veritas shouting at you.
“Idiot.”
He commented on your work before rewriting the entire thing for you and repeating it again.
“God dammit we're not even past the 20th page yet you're here crying like a child.”
Sniffles echoed in the room, only his lamp illuminating the room. You checked your phone and it was already 8 pm.
“Now read.”
“Q-quantum mechanics…”
He clenched his jaw, raising his voice at you before you could continue.
“You imbecile, not that— can't you read?!? Its wave function!”
“Whatever!”
Before he could react, you stood up, bag already in hand and walking away.
“We're not done yet.”
“I don’t care.”
Just like that, you were gone.
Despite you running off yesterday… There you were sitting on that same chair with the alabaster head man right in front of you.
“Again?”
You bit your lip nervously before tightening the grip on your pen.
“Yeah.”
Veritas nodded as he placed down his codex and walked to the sprawled shelves at his desk, his fingers tracing over the books (those books were rotting on those shelves, too dusty he had to wipe them)
“here.”
He took the book off the shelf and thrusted it into your hands.
‘The nonlinear schrodinger equation’
“Let's start with the ‘weakly nonlinear dispersion relation’ topic.”
Time flies by as he explains each term to you, giving definition after definition about each equation in front of you.
“Here, page 24.”
He pointed at the first equation but your eyes couldn't leave his stone head.
For an intimidating man, he's getting quite patient with you.
“— and let's compute the coefficients, after that,”
You couldn't stop wondering what he looked like under that stone head. It's hot out here, he must be sweating a tsunami in there. Is he handsome? or maybe he's wearing that stone head because he looks that bad?
“—the quantum mechanical pressure becomes negligible in the ‘semiclassical’ where nabla and—”
He hit your head with a codex, with no hesitation at all.
��ow!”
Oh shit— he must've noticed you staring.
“What were we reviewing?”
uh…
You gulped nervously, looking down at the page, you guys were already at page 26?!?
“0 points.”
He smacked you but with less force, though enough to leave a bruise.
“that hurt…”
“Then listen, don't waste my time.”
Under that alabaster head of his, a small smile formed from the corner of his lips due to the amusing sight before him.
“You're annoying, let's go over the fluid-dynamical form again.”
You weren't that boring after all.
You both were already at page 31, which was slow progress (at least to him, he can finish the book in under 3 hours.), yet still progress nonetheless.
“Do you get it now?”
It was already 9:58 pm, shit. You both got carried away…
“Yeah.”
Veritas handed the book over to you and hid away his highlighters.
“Go review at home— you better finish page 40.”
You nod, shoving the book into your satchel and your water bottle.
Today was… fun.
As you walked outside, one foot already out the door, you looked back.
“What?”
“and…”
There was a moment of silence, none of you moving before your voice shook,
“Thank you.”
He didn't say anything back, only putting back his folders in his bag as he removed his attention from you. You shook your head and just walked home.
It was the third day of him tutoring you, you were getting quite good.
“And how do you do the hamilton equation?”
There was a weird habit you did, you would bite your pen or sometimes click it nonstop due to stress (which you did now, don't do it too much though, you'll piss off veritas.)
You let out a soft hum before confidently writing the equation, no error in sight.
“And these quantities are called?”
“They're uh… momentas, right?”
“20 points— you're getting good at this.”
Receiving praise from others came by often, but to get one from the Dr. Veritas Ratio himself? You could wish.
Your eyes were glued at the scratch paper, unable to contain your smile; the aeons definitely smiled down on you and blessed you with his attention for today.
He takes note of this, but doesn't comment on that any further, only flipping the pages.
The fourth day. It was 2 pm, 3 hours earlier than the usual tutor hours. A new coffee shop opened in the food court at the university, which turned into the new buzz (the old coffee shops were shit.)
The line was long, your legs were about to give up but your students would occasionally suggest this shop, saying it's definitely better than the instant coffee at the teacher's lounge.
After 5 more minutes, it was finally your turn to order.
“Good afternoon! What can I get ya?”
The menu was definitely diverse, candy corn flavoured coffee? That's new.
“I'll take your special cappuccino”
The cheerful cashier jotted down your order, asking for your name then running to the back.
You sat down at some table and took out your laptop, fixing your schedules for this weekend.
“For ___?”
Eh? That was fast. It only took them 3 minutes to make your order despite the heavy line? Impressive.
“Thank you.”
You smiled and snatched the cup from the counter and walked back to your seat.
It tasted funny. Coffee jelly in cappuccino with sprinkles on top? At Least it tasted good.
“And here I was wondering where you are.”
“ack!”
You looked up and saw veritas in front of you, looming over you with his codex behind him after he hit you.
“that hurt…”
He sighed and sat down next to you while you rubbed the bruised area.
“Stop hitting people with your codex damn it!”
“I find it far more interesting to use my codex to get your attention.”
“Weirdo.”
He chuckled at the way scoffed, sipping your coffee and typing some requirements on an excel sheet.
“Anyways, why were you looking for me?”
He leaned back on the couch, before responding,
“Nothing, I was just wondering where the idiot was.”
“You little—”
Only a soft sigh left your lips as you continued to type, veritas beside you reading his codex and none of you saying a word.
Though this peaceful moment was short lived as the bell rang, signalling that the two of you had to go back to your respective classes.
Veritas sat up, closing his book.
“It's time for me to go.”
“Oh yeah.”
Veritas was gone in a blink of an eye, what's up with him disappearing so suddenly 24/7?!?
5 pm.
You were patiently waiting in the faculty room, what was taking veritas so long?
“You're late”
Veritas rolled his eyes— wait.
His stone head was… was this really the veritas ratio? He had nice purple hair, his eyes, he looked so… beautiful.
No way.
“When are you going to stop staring?”
“Oh— uh.”
You chuckled nervously before forcing a smile as he sat down in front of you.
“Let's continue where we let off.”
The sound of flipping pages reverberated across the room, your eyes locked onto his face. He would occasionally click his tongue at some parts of the book, guiding you through each equation as his face was close to yours; enough to feel his breath on your skin.
“—because its transformation φ is a symmetry and thus preserves the Lagrangian L and the action ,S=∫L”
Veritas ratio leaned closer to you, your hands touching as he got closer,
“Do you get it now?”
You didn't. You were too focused on his face, with every wrinkle of his brows, the tiniest details of his jaw and hell, even his eyes. How could you even focus? With his face inches away from yours? No way. The man right next to you stares at you, tapping his fingers on the mahogany table; he repeated himself.
“I said, do you get it now?”
Like the air was sucked out of your lungs, your last card was to lie but he was smart enough to not fall for that.
“Y-yes”
“Then what were we reviewing just now?”
He rolled his eyes hearing your mind blank out and confused ‘uhhs’ escaped your lips. You flinch from his harsh tone, as the cold stare turned into a glare.
“We should be reviewing the noether theorem, not my face.”
He made you solve equation after equation, his gaze not leaving you once as he crumpled your papers even after one minor mistake, “Idiot”, “Do it again.”, and “Are you really paying attention?” Constantly rang in your ears, you were not sure whether you asked for a tutoring session or a three hour insulting session from the revered professor.
“I'm sorry.”, He sighed at your visible frustration as you apologised through gritted teeth. He started to pity you when you struggled with just the terms at the next lesson. Was this theorem that hard? He dropped his pen and closed the book.
“Let’s end today’s session.”
A look of relief appeared on your face as he said those words, clearly, he’ll give you a break—
“Just read this book instead. It gives a more in-depth explanation”
— or not. He thrusted the book in your hands and put on his alabaster head, making you raise an eyebrow,
“What? You can’t seem to focus without this on”
You laughed an awkward chuckle while sliding the book in your satchel, a small squeak was heard when he stood up and moved his chair at his desk.
“Tomorrow again?”
“Sure.”
Veritas tapped his feet aggressively as time past by, you were late by 20 minutes, by now he would've left but for some reason he's feeling nice today that he'll wait for you.
The faculty room door slid open as light footsteps entered the room.
“Sorry ‘m late.”
You smelled different today. That would sound creepy to the average person but despite the tight alabaster sculpture that covers his face, he could smell your perfume and that he's gotten used to your scent by now.
“Did you wear something new?”
“Come again?”
He took one glance at you and shook his head and shifted his attention to the complex arithmetics on his codex.
“Hey, what did you mean by that?”
It was hard to ignore you as he tried to mute your voice but he let out an inaudible sigh before taking a quick glance at you.
“I meant your perfume, idiot.”
“No need to be rude.” you scoffed and placed down your bag at your desk.
He finds himself eager for a response as your right hand shuffled in your bag looking for the perfume bottle,
“I just tried something new.”
“Oh?”
He leans over the table to take a closer look at the bottle, inspecting it with a skeptical look one he's glad you cannot see through his sculpted head.
“It was a gift from one of our coworkers here”
There was a loud slamming sound that rang in the room when you dropped the materials Veritas made you read, it was a pain highlighting everything.
“From who?”
Why was he suddenly interested? He's not one to ask about anyone's affairs so suddenly, not that he'd care about something so miniscule about you like perfume yet you humour him.
“From Amir, the history prof guy?”
“I see.” For some reason, he finds himself feeling annoyed after hearing who you got it from. Why would you accept a gift from that idiot? He's a far better history professor, definitely? definitely.
Hours passed yet he couldn't concentrate. Not with that foul stench of your new perfume of yours.
Dr. Ratio scrunched his nose in disgust as he continued to guide you through each and every lesson, harsher than usual— you didn't know why.
“Wrong answer, 2 points.”
Veritas smacked your arm with his heavy codex and snatched your answer sheet, crumpling it and tossing it in the bin.
“Do it again.”
This fucker. You were starting to lose your resolve but you do not falter under his scrutinising gaze.
Again and again. Another 30 minutes yet your answers didn't seem ‘perfect’ enough.
Veritas clicked his tongue in annoyance as you failed to answer another simple question again
“Are you even paying attention?”
“If you didn't yell at me every minute I would've”
You continued to write more equations as he rolled his eyes at your reply, his eyes scanned your work and it was okay (atleast to his standards).
His eyes squinted, looking for any mistake but there was none, he gave up.
“50 points”, he spoke in a defeated tone.
“Just 50?”
“0 points then”
“Oh come on.”
It was hell getting tutored by him.
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A/N: ITS TWO PARTS COS FUCK TUMBLR AND TOLD ME THERES A WORD LIMIT LOL. THE FULL FIC WAS LIKE 6.4K WORDS OR SHIT DAMN. ITS SO CRINGE ONG IMMA POST PART TWO TMRW GOD. IM LAGG>NG SO NAD RN HELP
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epicthemusical · 1 month
Text
Familiar Longing
@fuckingdeadinsidetm for the inspiration so thank you!
Eurylochus takes a deep breath before heading over to his Captain's hunched form. He has to confess about opening the wind bag or else the guilt will strangle him. He looks down in shame as he starts to talk.
"Captain, I have something I have to tell you. I won't be able to rest until I do. Captain I-" 
As he is about to confess he looks up and stands there speechless. The rising sun hits the brown curls and gods when did his Captain's hair get so long? He is reminded of the times after he and Ctimene spent mornings on the beach as she ran through waves and sand laughing freely with a grin. She always ended up with her curls tangled up while covered in salt and sand. Every time he made sure to gently clean and untangle her hair as they relaxed together. The color is a bit off and it's still shorter than hers but it's still so familiar. He is broken out of his memories and longing by Odysseus' voice.
"Whatever you have to say can wait some more I'm sure. Go scout the island, we can't take any more dangers sneaking up on us."
"Yes Captain."
Eurylochus walks away shame and guilt feels like it's choking him but he does as he was ordered and gathered men before heading off to scout the island.
—----------------------------------------------------
Eurylochus stares down at the still form of his friend, his brother, his captain. He feels sick at the blood pooling on the deck adding to the sickening metallic smell from the 6 who had died. Thinking of that again has some part of him shrinking in on itself as the betrayal and guilt lay heavy in his chest.
“Captain?” He had felt so relieved that Odysseus had trusted him enough to still have him carry out his orders even after he finally admitted to opening the wind bag Eurylochus light up six torches. He had trusted him but he obviously chose wrong.
“Sir.” All he has ever known is being the second in command. He follows orders and keeps everyone safe. How was he supposed to lead, to be a captain? He doesn't have Odysseus to catch him if he falls anymore. What is he supposed to do now?
“Eurylochus!” He finally snaps out of it and looks up at the remaining crew to think they had started out with 600 men
“What should we do with the capt- with Odysseus?” He glances again at the unconscious Odysseus. It would be reasonable to kill him now after all they did just mutiny. Who knows what will happen once he wakes up but…he can't bring himself to let him die. Not only is he Eurylochus’ brother-in-law but he is also Ctimene’s brother. The thought of having to watch his beloved wife's face fall in despair when he has to tell her Eurylochus is the one who killed her brother…no he can't let Odysseus die.
“We need to wrap his wounds and tie him up. Make sure to tie him well. We all know how tricky he can be.” Many of the crew grumble a bit but do as they are told although they made no effort to be gentle. Eurylochus' hands tighten their hold on himself trying his best to ignore the pained moans from Odysseus as he is tied securely to the mast, his wound taken care of.
He hands out orders firmly despite the growing unease and uncertainty he feels. He can't let his weakness show now that he is Captain or else they will lose trust in him. Now matter how exhausted or how much he wants to break he cannot falter. He glances once again at Odysseus tied to the mast before making his way to his room. He knows that the captain's quarters technically belong to him now but it just feels wrong. That has always been Odysseus' room and he can't bring himself to change that because that would make it official. That would mean he has to fully accept what he had just done and he isn't ready for that he doesn't think he ever will be.
Eurylochus all but collapses onto his bed and stares at the ceiling almost feeling numb. He glances down at the blood still on him and the sudden grief overwhelms him as he starts crying. Once the tears start he cant stop as he lays curled up his body shaking from his sobs as he lets out all his pain. Polites would be so disappointed in them both. He told Odysseus that if he wanted all the power then he must carry all the blame but he can't bring himself to believe those words. How could he after he was the one questioning Odysseus time after time. His own doubt made him open the wind bag leading to so many dying. He has just as much blood on his hands as Odysseus, maybe even more.
He slowly calms down leaving only a hollow ache in his chest as he drifts off to sleep praying for a dreamless rest.
The next day he sits down by the mast watching over Odysseus. He still isn't awake just yet but he knows how quickly things could change with him. Eurylochus takes some time to really look at his friend for the first time in a while. Ever since Circe's island where he noticed how Odysseus' hair had grown longer and achingly familiar to Ctimene’s curly hair he has tried his best to not look too hard. He takes in the bags under his eyes and how skinny he had become. What draws his attention the most however is once again his hair. His hair had grown long and tangled but it is so painfully familiar even with the slight color difference it reminds him so much of his wife. He aches to thread his fingers through the knots gently untangle it like he often did with Ctimene at the end of the day. They used to talk and laugh about anything and everything while he helped calm her unruly hair that never seemed to obey. As he comes back from the memory the hollow feeling grows and he feels so very tired.
-----
They arrive at the next island and Odysseus is tied to a nearby statue as they find plenty of large healthy cows roaming nearby. Eurylochus notices Odysseus is starting to stir and he can't help but miss Odysseus, the Odysseus he had known and trusted with his life and the lives of the crew. When is the last time either of them have smiled or laughed? Perhaps it was before Polites had died which isn't surprising. Polites had always been the best of them, always so kind and positive. He was the glue that kept everyone together so when he died of course everything started falling apart. Odysseus groans as he wakes up at last.
"Uhg my head...where are we?"
"The first island we found. It has this statue of the sun god and we found all these cows to eat."
"Don't tell me you're about to do what I think you'll do!" 
It hurts hearing his friend plead with those familiar words. He feels so heavy and he just wants to lay down and never move again but he can't not when he needs to take care of the crew.
"I'm hungry, my friend."
His stomach grumbles at the thought of finally eating and he knows the crew feels the same hunger eating them from the inside.
"And I'm tired.."
He is just so very tired. Tired of fighting, of thinking and hoping that somehow they will end up home again. He sees Odysseus start to struggle against the ropes.
"Please we can still make it home! We just need to keep going!"
How many times has he heard that? We are almost home, this is our final fight, our journey is almost done it has become a hollow statement at this point. Hope has long since been crushed. 
"Ody we are never going to make it home."
Why should he make himself and the crew suffer even more when they have meat to eat right here when they won't make it home anyway? A crew mate leads a cow to Eurylochus and he raises his sword.
"I'm just a man."
Odysseus manages to cut the ropes on a nearby rock and once free springs into action trying to stop Eurylochus.
"EURYLOCHUS NO!"
He is too late as the sword slices through flesh and golden blood stains the sword. He stares in shock at the gold. Why is it gold? A storm forms and lighting rumbles ominously.
"You doomed us...you doomed us all Eurylochus!"
Eurylochus looks up at Odysseus noting the terror hidden in his eyes and the red bleeding through the bandages. He has rarely ever seen Odysseus terrified like this and if his brother feels so now...what has he done?
"..Captain?"
He orders the crew to grab an oar and row for their lives. The anger and fear in his voice jolt everyone into action as they default to following orders as they had for over a decade. Eurylochus looks concerned at the still growing red spot as Odysseus turns and meets his eyes.
"Those cows are immortal, they are the sun god's friends. And now that we've pissed him off WHO DO YOU THINK HE'LL SEND?!"
Eurylochus pales as he realizes just how badly he has messed up. How could he have been so stupid?! No he knows why, he had given up on getting home and his hunger, always the damn hunger that screws them over. He should have learned from the cyclops cave. How could he have given up on seeing Ctimene again? More lightning crackles through the sky lighting up a form in the clouds.
"We're too late..."
Zeus descends from the thunder clouds as lightning continues to shatter the sky and cause ears to ring. He sees Odysseus stand as tall as he can considering the still slowly bleeding wound with determined eyes. That's always been his go to attitude when it comes to gods, he tries to appear confident and firm. Eurylochus can only hope his brother will find a way out as he usually does.
But will he? He has shown he is willing to sacrifice you if it means getting home.
Eurylochus can feel the exhaustion and hopelessness creep in again as Odysseus is finally given a choice, him or the crew. It's obvious that there it wasn't going to be a choice, not for Odysseus.
He doesn't really mind dying at this point but he regrets that the crew had to be included as well. That and no matter what Odysseus chooses, Ctimene will be heartbroken. He can't be sure that he won't give up again so it's best Odysseus is the one who lives because if anybody can manage to make it home it would be him. At least that way he can be sure his wife will have someone to comfort her.
".. Captain?"
He still finds himself protesting even with his heart not in it. He has to try if only for the crew around him.
"I have to see her again..."
"But we'll die."
What is it he told Odysseus? Ah yes If you want all the power you must carry all the blame. If the crew dies it won't be Odysseus' fault only his. He is the one that decided to slaughter the cow and doom them all. He sees Odysseus turn around to face him with teary eyes full of guilt and exhaustion, just like Eurylochus.
"I know."
Eurylochus breaks more at how broken Odysseus sounds. He is obviously grieving the choice he had to make. Eurylochus takes a deep breath and stands still accepting his death without a fight even as the others draw swords and rush Odysseus. 
Electricity hums in the air before lightning strikes and pain crackles through his body. As he starts to sink the pain dulls, his nerves having been fried beyond use. He closes his eyes and lets the darkness take him.
I'm sorry Ctimene...
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Text
Neteyam x human reader
Chapter 2
(Tw: Smut, Rough, Size kink)
Link part 1 at the bottom! I think if these chapters keep going well im going to make it a 6 part story! I would love to share some more smut and actual plot with you!
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It was a few hours later that Kiri came hurdling through your bedroom door, "You won't believe what happened!" She yelled before planting herself on your freshly cleaned bed.
You sat up with interest placing your book down next to you, your face scrunching up at the movement. "Well you have to tell me now!" You exclaimed trying to match her enthousiasm.
She didn't seem to notice your struggle as she leaned toward you like she was sharing the greatest secret ever, her placing her blue hands on your shoulders "Neteyam. was. in. a. fight!" She laughed loudly at her own words, "He came home like two hours ago, all bruised up!"
Your heart jumped in your stomach, "What?" You mumbled. Apparently he had found an excuse.
"Yup! He came home like he hadn't been out all night, and Neytiri about threw a fit when he wouldn't tell her who did it!" Kiri smirked. "It was very rewarding to see him rebel against the parents, he's normally such a 'perfect son'."
Jup the perfect son who had said and done the most unholy things to you just the night before...
You shook your head, feeling guilty at the thought of Neteyam having to lie to his parents. You knew he strived to be a worthy succesor, you doubted this whole ordeal had been worth the hassle for him.
You let out a sigh, "What did Jake say? Was he very mad?" You asked softly.
Kiri rolled her eyes. "Well honestly he wasn't thrilled at first, but when he heard Neteyam had won the fight and he knew Neytiri wasn't watching he just gave him a pat on the back."
You let out a sigh of relief, "That's good"
"He always gets away with so much more than us," She complained. Dramatically draping herself over your pillows, raising her head to look at you.
"Oh yes i almost forgot to ask, tommorow the other Na'vi from the clan and us are going to the Hallelujah mountains! Did you want to come?" She asked excitedly.
You gave her a doubtfull look, you really didn't want to face Neteyam yet.
"Oh come on y/n pleassee! Neteyam probably won't even be allowed to attend!" Kiri pleaded, she had probably mistaken your curiosity about her brother as hostile... not whatever it actually was.
"Okay... fine" you finally murmured, honestly suprised you were able to resist her puppy dog eyes so long.
"Good! Lo'ak said he would pick you up after dropping of spider, you better be ready Y/n because the warriors are going to do a race on their ikrans again!" Kiri ranted, you somehow catching the whole thing.
"Wait wow, they allowed them to race again? After what happened last time?" You lifted your eyebrows in suprise, suprised Jake had been so lenient.
"Well he kind of has too! It's a holy ceremony, so however dangerous it is it's still in the name of Eywa!" Kiri shrugged.
"Now do you still want me to show you my new book?" You said to change the subject.
Kiri nodded excitedly and jumped to sit beside you.
~~~
You stood in front of the human lab in the dewy morning air, droplets of water still covering the plants around you. The sun still low in the sky, casting a warm light on the landscape.
It felt strange to look at your surroundings freely without the usual glass in front of your face, the new and improved mask Norm had made 'finally' fool proof. Now it just existed of an oxygen wire and a little machine clipped too your pants.
You had taken the rest of yesterday for yourself giving yourself a much needed relaxing bath. Honestly the aching muscles and other aching bits on your body still remained, not to mention the bruises and hickeys almost everywhere. You and Neteyam hadn't noticed instantly but you were sure he was covered as well.
A whistle pierced the air, startling you as Lo'ak's Ikran landed next to you, his mouth pulled into an inviting grin "Come on 'sky demon', we need to get to the others!" He yelled holding out a hand toward you, lifting you up to sit behind him.
Your dress thankfully covered any other hickeys and bruises as your legs were mostly unharmed. You had put on a blouse over it, the thin fabric covering your neck and arms nicely.
"You allright y/n? You seem off today." Lo'ak said softly, the boy was honestly too sweet sometimes. And he was indeed correct about you being quiet, you were normally much more talkative with him.
"Yup, still tired i guess" you just replied, hoping he wouldn't question you more.
"Hey i still wanted to ask you about Net...." he was interupted by a large amount of whoops and yells. The other Na'vi circling the two of you.
"Hey lovely sky demon! It's been a while since you joined us isn't it?" Mi,ak a younger na'vi waved at you with a smile, the jest more of a joke than a serious insult.
"Yup! Been a while! But here i am!" You yell at her, thankfull your lips didn't even come close to Lo'aks ears in this position.
The boy lands the ikran on a big ledge of one of the flying mountains, a large group allready gathered there. Spider and Kiri running up to the two of you.
"Y/n! There you are!" Kiri yelled with an excited Tuk hanging on her arm, "You better get off quick, they are going to start soon!" Spider yelled as he helped you off the large animal, carying you off and setting you on the ground.
Tuk held your hand tightly the moment you got off, dragging you along with her to the crowd"I'm so excited!," She yelled loudly.
Lo'ak waved at the other two as he quickly turned around and moved his ikran to the large group gathered on the edge of the mountain.
It was interesting how many different colour ikran there were, today they seemed almost peacefull. It had been strange to see the animals in a group not meant for war, a melancholy settling in your stomach at the sight.
The warriors were lining up at the edge of the platform, their bodies covered in war paint and more practical clothing than normal.
Confusion circled your stomach as you spotted another familiar Ikran in the midst of the chaos. "Oh my god, is that Neteyam?" You asked softly a flabbergasted expression on your face as you stared at the man.
"Yup! It totally is! NETEYAM!" Tuk screamed so loudly it almost blew your eardrums out. He swiveled around to look at her, his eyes instantly on your form.
He caught your eye, the two of you lost in the other for a second. He seemed so much older as he sat on the ikran, his riding visor set on his hairline and a thick leather piece clasped around his waist. His shoulders seemed broad, and his jawline seemed so strong. He looked like a true warrior.
Even from here you could see the scratches, bruises and hickeys across his body. You doubted another person would know what those were, you had never seen another Na'vi with any.
Jake, Neytiri and the other older Na'vi were stood next to him, Jake having switched his usual huge ikran with a normal sized one. Neteyam barely seemed any smaller than them from this distance.
It scared you how grown up he seemed to get, you knew you didn't belong in his future. Or at least the future his parents intended him to have.
Kiri gave you a sheepish smile as she leaned over, "Yeah, he suddenly insisted on coming this morning. I kind of forgot to tell you."
You opened your mouth to respond,...
"Allright! Today the riding Na'vi are racing their ikran to the Sljikla tree located on the other side of the halleluyah mountains." An older male you recognised as Heliruin yelled toward the remaining crowd of people stood in front of him, he had a fucked up knee from an ill placed bullet in the war. That was probably why he didn't compete.
"Now before you go there! You have to grab a marker from both of the other islands, he lifted up two pieces of red and yellow cloth "There are just enough for all of you, so if anyone grabs two your disqualified!"
"You are competing for the honor of victory and for a token dedicated to your win!" He finally yelled, the crowd roaring at the beaded sting he held in the air, a rare red gem hanging on the end.
"Now we wil start on three,
One.
Two.
Three!"
Chaos ensued as all the Ikran set off into the sky, the contestants all trying to slow down the others instantly. This meant pushing, kicking and throwing things at the other contestants. Which was the thing that caused a collision with a rock last year.
"Whooo you all got this!" Tuk yelled loudly, you only able to stare at your blue guy currently in the lead with your heart in your throat. He went impossibly fast in grabbing the markers, the others struggling to keep up. He moved like a warrior, his ikran following his lead like another limb.
You were pulled out of your thoughts as an ikran you recognised as Jake's tried to pull in front of Neteyam and cut him off. He seemed unfaced though so your heart calmed down a bit as he expertly moved across the mountains.
Finally Neteyam touched down on the ground in front of the tree, you just barely being able to see him place a palm on the tree. Jake wasn't far behind, touching the tree after him.
You looked around you at the crowd, the world seeming to slow down for a second. You noticed a few things all at once, Na'vi skin was beautifull in the sunlight, There were really a lot of beautifull women in the clan, and alot of them really liked your big blue guy.
You let out a shaky sigh, what had you done sleeping with him. You had really set yourself up for future heartache when he chose a Na'vi mate in the end.
Your friends all yelled loudly, you being more distracted by your thoughts.
~~~
It was another while before Neteyam, Jake and the rest arrived back at the ledge. You remained a bit behind the group, a bit too unsure of yourself to greet him first. It seemed Neteyam was first, afterwards Jake, after him Neytiri then two unknown riders and then Lo'ak.
The father and son jumped of the Ikran first, the other Na'vi coming over to congratulate him. Someone placing the token in his hand during. The other Sully kids gathered around their older brother, him strangely just looking around in the crowd in thought.
Neytiri who had also stepped of her Ikran looking at the young man in confusion. "You allright son?" She asked placing a hand on her grown son's shoulder.
"Yep I'm fine," He murmured obviously stil not listening as he looked around, growing more desperate by the second.
The other Na'vi seemed confused at his strange demeanor as well. You frowned in confusion, as he pushed a few other Na'vi out of his way.
Jake went to follow him, but was stopped by the crowd.
Neteyam's gaze hit yours in a flash, a relieved expression on his face as he finally looked into your eyes.. The world went quiet around you two as he walked toward you. Your heart beat reverberating through your body and your body relaxing as you looked at him.
He was on you in seconds, placing his hands on your waist and pulling you into an embrace. "I missed you, He murmured into your hair breathing in softly, "I won this for you" he muttered as he hesitatingly let you go of your hand to give you something.
The beaded string hit your palm softly, the red gem shining beautifully in the light. You stared at him and it with wide eyes, Neteyam just giving you a nervous smile.
"Well...wow... thank you so much. I love it." you finally settled on as you pulled his head down to give him a peck on the cheek. He blushed as well, his cheeks turning purple as a large smile spread on his cheeks. His hands softly stroking your waist.
"Let me put it in your hair, he muttered as he gathered a large strand of hair in his hands, expertly tying the bead into your hair. His hands carressing way more of your neck than neccesary during.
A warmth filled your stomach as you stared at his concentrated face.
The act was usually only reserved for mated people but he didn't seem to care, a satisfied smile appearing on his face as he stood back to behold his handiwork. The thin hair wrap blending in well with your hair, but standing out enough for people to notice.
Neither of you really acknowledged the crowd around you until it was a bit too late, a cough interrupting the two of you. Neteyam instantly moving in front of you at the interuption. Him calming down at the familiar face.
"Uhm bro, you might want to take this elsewhere" Lo'ak whispered as he gestured to Jake and Neytiri who were staring wide eyed at the two of you, a confused Norm quickly being called over by the Sully matriarch,
"Yup, he's right" You murmured as you saw a few other people in the crowd start staring too. Neteyam seemed annoyed he had to let you go, slowly pulling his hands of your waist.
Lo'ak grasped his brothers arm, "I'll distract them bro," He gave his brother a teasing look. "Then you might finally get over yourself and just kiss her." he let out a mocking laugh. "Allthough i doubt that"
Little did he know what they had done allready, you noticed Neteyam hide a smirk aswell.
The older of the two released a sigh at his brothers antics, but patted him on the back anyway before the boy left.
"lets go over there" Neteyam murmured as he pointed to a small alcove in the rock. You would be totally hidden from sight there, unless someone walked in that is.
He grasped your hand and pulled you toward it, Lo'ak starting to tell an heavily embelished 'war story' to distract the crowd. Effectively distracting the parents so you could slip away.
You were around the corner first, turning your body around to face him. "I'm not sure how were going to hide this anym..." you couldn't finish your sentence, his lips interupting you mid sentence as they covered yours in a sudden kiss. His tongue softly licking your lips as you opened up your mouth to let him slip his tongue in.
He groaned in your mouth, a hand grasping your ass automatically. You whined into his mouth, before he seperated from you for a second, leaving you hot and bothered.
"I'm really sorry, but this new oxygen mask, i just really neede..." He murmured guiltily, you interupting him this time as you jumped up in his arms wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him down toward you.
He let out a low growl, when you pulled at one of his braids. His arms wrapped under your thighs as he lifted you up. You wrapping your legs around him ignoring the discomfort between your legs to harshly rub against him.
A deep growl reverberated from his mouth as Neteyam deepened the kiss pressing your back against the wall as he grinded against you this time. His bare chest rubbing against your clothed one, you really wishing you could press your naked one against him again.
"I would take you right here, but...." he let out a shaky sigh, "You really need to rest, we really pushed you hard for our first time" He mumbled into your ear.
"Do you remember? My cock pressed deep into you, stretching you out so well?" He breathed out the words, a distant look on his face as he was lost in thought. You startled as you felt a bulge start to form under his loincloth, it pressing increasingly hard at your now moist panties.
"Uhm...Neteyam?" You squeeked, your voice turning higher than you wanted. He startled from his thoughts accidentally grinding against you more.
You let out a moan, as his bulge pressed against your core. "Please tell me to stop, i can't hurt you." He sadly murmured in your ear softly as he rutted against you.
You shook your head "This is fine, we just.." you let out a wanting moan. "We just can't.... you can't put your cock in me." You struggled to keep your voice normal.
You felt your body becoming warmer every second, his rough loincloth rubbing your clothed clit every time he came into contact. You both started to move faster against eachother, him groaning harshly into your mouth.
Your throat failed you as you let out the most ungodly moan, just as his erection slipped out from his loincloth and slid across your clothed folds. It's head softly sitting between your moist thighs.
You stared at him with half lidded eyes, your body deciding for you as you automatically slid your thighs back and forth over his member. His groaning continuing harshly, you feeling him start to shake.
You felt his hand enter your panties for a second, his fingers just raking across your wet folds before he suddenly took it out. You whined at the sensitive feeling, looking wide eyed as he licked his fingers clean.
Your teeth grazed his bottom lip, as you placed your lips over his. His face dwarving yours, his mouth way bigger than your own. That didn't stop him when he ran his tongue through your mouth, put it back in his own before collecting your combination of saliva on his tongue and sticking it back in your mouth.
You moaned softly at the strange taste.
The remaining shame you had both felt was gone as you lost yourselves in eachother. It must have been an obscene sight as his cock was pressed between your thighs and you devoured eachother messily. Both of your moans and the sucking and smacking sounds echoeing in the cave.
Neteyam grasped your blouse, pulling it open too reveal your allready bruised neck. He worked his mouth over the supple flesh, sucking harshly.
"You know you are mine, and your rubbing me so good." He cooed as his blue hand stroked your cheek, "Wouldn't it just be riviting if one of our clan mates saw us here, they would walk in and they would see you covered in my spit. Grinding on my cock" he sighed softly.
"They would know your mine instantly," He closed his eyes in bliss his pace growing harder and faster.
His cock sliding harshly across your abused folds was mind numbing, your mind so far gone you could barely think.
"I'm all yours big guy," you whispered as you looked into his big golden eyes, his pupils dilating again as his movements became eratic whilst he neared his orgasm.
"And you own me." He murmured as he harshly pressed you against the wall one last time, you feeling his sticky seed spill between your legs.
He let out a shaky sigh as he enjoyed the aftereffects of his orgasm, it almost being hypnotising to see him release himself on your body.
He softly tucked his now softened member back in his loincloth, giving you a sudden shy smile.
"Now i really want to pleasure you aswell" Neteyam murmured, as he started to kiss down your body.
Footsteps echoed through the cave as someone neared their secret spot. You both looking at eachother with wide eyes.
You pulled down your dress over your now sticky thighs, ignoring the warm feeling of his cum in your underwear.
Neteyam wiped your and his mouth with his hand, quickly placing you on your feet, jumping away from you instantly.
The familiar face of two of your friends, Mi,ak and Siatam entered the cave the female Na'vi startling at the two of you stood inside the small space.
"Oh hello there you two! Were you having a private conversation again?" Mi,ak said with a raised eyebrow. Siatam smiled as well, "Guys you should really talk to other people and not just yourselves! You two are way too close friends" She teased with a smile.
The two of you were known for being close friends and sneaking of to talk with eachother a lot, to your friends this wasn't strange behaviour at all. You never knew your innocent escapades from before could mean so much more now.
Luckily they didn't seem to see the change.
"Oh wel no not at all private! Haha.. were were just talking about the competition!" You somehow came up with an excuse, Neteyam giving you an impressed smile at your quick thinking.
Mi,ak and Siatam smiled broadly "Now Neteyam i have to admit that this was impressive even for you! You bested your father like it was nothing!" Mi,ak complimented, placing a tentative hand on Neteyam's shoulder. "You are a very mighty warrior.
He brushed of her hand instantly, instead grasping your arm and tugging you with him.You smiled awkwardly, very uncomfortable with the situation.
Mi'ak didn't seem to notice his rejection, only strolling after the two of you as you excited the cave. Still raving about his riding skills.
You looked around the crowd quickly, no one really noticing the strange pair and their temporary dissapearance. Except when your eyes met cold ones on the other side of the crowd, you instantly recognising them as Neytiri's, you quickly distanced yourself from Neteyam, softly nudging him to Mi'ak. He stumbled a bit accidentally getting a bit too close to the other Na'vi who stroked a hand across his chest again before joining her other friends.
When Neteyam looked back at you in confusion you slightly nudged your head toward his father. Neteyam's nodding in understanding.
He gave you a soft look before strolling toward his other friends, glancing behind him to stare at you during.
~~~
You and Neteyam had spend that whole day and the two after stealing secret glances at eachother. Jake, Neytiri and now Norm were not taking their eyes of the two of you for one second, them basically locking the two of you up night and day.
They couldn't possibly know everything that had happened. But you were sure the hair wrap had been the final nail in the coffin.
They had began pushing you and Spider together again, them constantly teaming the two of you up for things.
You noticed they had done the same to Neteyam as the boy now only seemed to do two things, which was dully strolling behind Mi'ak as they got teamed up for something random or full on glaring at Spider.
You could honestly say you really missed him, life just seemed so empty without your best friend around. Although Kiri thankfully still managed to cheer you up slightly.
It was around the end of the third day that they finally dropped their constant surveilance on the two of you.
The Metkayina clan had decided to visit your tribe the following week, the tribe had aided a lot during the Na'vi vs the sky people war. You and the other kids had all fought with them, it was a time with a lot of tears and blood spilled and none of the others really enjoyed talking about it.
You had been the only human they had tolerated there, this only after you risked your life to save the little kids of the tribe who were almost killed by a stray soldier. Spider was almost thrown to the sharks after he tried to save Quaritch, so they probably still kind of loathed him for that.
Anyway, considering the preperations of the celebration, sleeping arrangements and sustenance the 'adults' had gone on a frantic rampage to get everything ready in time.
And this made it that when you had locked eyes across the camp, and when the parents looked away you both snuck of to the only place no one would be at that time.
One of the extra halls attached to the old human base had been a pool, which was basically a 'cleaner' lake. The other scientists made sure it was still functional, as they still used it for excerise often.
This was one of the places you didn't have to wear a mask, and so Neteyam had practically forced the two of you over here.
"Why exactly did you want to meet here again?" You murmured as you turned your head to look at the large alien behind you. He just shrugged avoiding the question before placing the oxygen tank down and taking a hefty puff through the mask.
You turned to look at the pool, the water seeming strangely blue because of the tiles at the bottom. It was actually quite a deep pool you could barely see the bottom on the deep end of the pool, luckily a sort of ramp style made it that the pool became way less deep on the other end.
A lot of the lights had stopped working over the years, as now only the lights in the pool still remained functional. You noticed the water gave the room a blue tint as the reflection of the soft ripples shone on you and Neteyam.
You startled out of your thoughts as your blue alien reached around you to unbutton your pants. You let out a squeek as his hands shamelessly explored your body. "You wear too much clothes." he whispered in your ear.
"No i don't, and you can't allways rip my clothes off" you teased, a blush rising on your cheeks.
"Hm, i wouldn't mind making you new ones" he murmured as his eyes scanned your legs, you squirming under his gaze. His gaze grew more intense as you kicked of your now unbuttoned pants slowly lifting up your tanktop.
He instantly laid his warm hand on your belly his palm almost covering it entirely. You shivered at the sudden touch. "You are so soft.." he murmured to himself. He grasped onto the little bit of fat on the underside of your stomach, "I want to feel this against me again soon."
You blushed bright red as you swatted as his hands, "Neteyam! You can't just suddenly say stuff like that" you murmured.
His yellow eyes seemed almost green in the blue light, a smile circling his lips. "You are mine, and you are beautifull and soft, and i have the right to tell you that," he spoke in english this time, his Na'vi accent still visible through the words. His warm hand stubbornly remaining on your stomach as he gave you an intense stare.
Neteyam was suprisingly possesive these days, and you honestly hadn't known your gentle friend had this dominance in him. Not to mention the sudden rebelious streak he was on, actively deceiving his parents to spend time with you.
His hands moved toward your hips, softly pulling your body toward his and bending down to look you in the eye. "You are so small," he mumbled as his breath hit your face.
He placed a little peck on your nose, before his warm mouth slowly covered yours. Him dominating the kiss instantly, softly running his larger tongue through your mouth. You let out a moan, him groaning in response.
His fingers tickled your stomach softly, you letting out a squeel at the familiar action. This something he had done since he figured out as you were kids what a fun reaction he got by doing it.
He and Lo'ak often did things like that when you were kids.
A sudden idea struck you as you pulled his hands of your hips, allowing yourself to quickly slip downward making an escape as you ducked out from under him.
"Y/n?" He asked confused as he looked around to see where you ran off too. His gaze caught on a ripple in the water, him walking over to the edge to look for you, unknowingly peering into the blue abyss.
You smirked as you slowly snuck up behind him ducking down and using one of his hunting skills he had taught you when you were both young teens. The skill now proving usefull as you steadied yourself and pushed out your hands, your big blue alien letting out a scream and spashing water everywhere as he stumbled into the pool.
You laughed loudly as his head popped out from under the waves, revealing an annoyed looking Neteyam with his braids now clung to his skin.
"Your going to pay for that!" He yelled loudly, a gleefull smile revealing he wasn't actually all that annoyed with you. The sight familiar to you as you imagined a younger Neteyam doing the same, his round face and tiny body now replaced with a strong jawline and broad shoulders.
You had played like this all the time when you were kids and it was kind of nice to kind of relive that now.
His gaze turned gentle as he swam to the edge, "What are you thinking about?" He murmured, leisurely crossing his arms over the edge and placing his chin down on top.
You let out a sigh, "I guess i was just reminicing a little." You sat down next to his arms, placing your feet in the water and dangling them slightly.
Neteyam nodded softly, keeping his gaze fixed on your face.
"Do you remember going to the lakes when we were kids?" You asked, softly caressing one of his now soaked braids.
A smile spread on his lips as he gained a distant look in his eyes, "I don't think i can ever forget all that joy and happiness, we might have been young but i still remember a lot from back then." His hand grasped yours giving it a little squeeze.
"I was just afraid that all that trauma from the war might have overshadowed that," you murmured softly, thinking back to all the loss and death you had all endured so young. "Some things are still a bit muddled sometimes,"
You thought back to the time that you had gone to save Spider from the sky people. You, Lo'ak and Neteyam sneaking into the poachers boat and somehow succeeding to retrieve the other boy. Only for one of their men to show up at the last second to shoot at them, he had actually managed to hit Neteyam if it wasn't for the fact you managed to push him in the water just in time.
The only problem being that you had not taken into account that the guy would switch to swinging his gun around when his bullets ran out.
Which was how you got your lights punched out before you were plunged into the water, the guy thinking you were dead. Neteyam had looked behind him to find you, only to find your lifeless form floating right next to him.
Que the most horrifying moment ever when he thought you were dead, still dragging your body right to the nearest shore. He had basically screamed at his brother that he had forced them to go rescue Spider. When he finally calmed down a bit they recruited Tsureya to stay with your body, as they couldn't find a pulse.
Neteyam had basically gone on a murder spree, murdering a LOT of people as revenge. You scaring Tsureya's socks off as you suddenly started moving again.
Needless to say, it was a pleasant suprise for your blue alien when he returned to find you very much concussed but still alive. He had basically been your nurse the entire time you got better. Staying beside you even when you insisted he rested himself.
That was when he had first started acting strange around you allready.
You felt Neteyam squeeze your hand, pulling you from your memories. "Your thinking about the war aren't you? You do that alot these days." He murmured softly giving you a meaningfull stare.
You shrugged, averting your gaze "Don't you do it too? Especially now things changed between us."
Neteyam let out a breath, "Yes, i do. But mostly at night... when you aren't with me" His grip on your hand tightened before he spoke again. "I have a lot of nightmares these days, about.. uhm.. about losing you."
You turned to him in suprise, "About what happened back at the ship?"
He flinched before nodding, avoiding your gaze as you tried to look him in the eyes.
You slid yourself over to him, him instantly making space for you to sit on the edge in front of him.
"Teyam?" You murmured as you grasped his chin toward you, "I'm here now." You placed a kiss on his nose before placing your forehead on his.
He 'innocently' smiled, "Say if i happen to have another one of those Nightmares, you wouldn't mind if i climb into bed with you right?" His warm hands slid over your legs before settling on your hips.
You knew he was joking, but you couldn't help but take what he said seriously. "I would never mind spending time with you Neteyam, whatever the time whatever the place." You gave him a soft smile.
The look on his face warmed your insides as he smiled the biggest you had ever seen him smile. He placed his hands under your arms, lifting you off the edge of the pool and in his arms.
You let out a squeek, not at all expecting the action.Your body suddenly flush against his musculair chest as you wrapped your arms around his neck. His hands sliding downward until he held you up by your thighs.
"So good" you heard him mutter as he drew you as close as you possibly could be, his yellow eyes gaining that primal tint you had seen only once before as he observed your form.
A familiar warmth grew between your legs, you struggling to keep your cool because of it. You really only wanted one thing, and you needed it right now. You needed that delicious fullness right now, you even slightly wanting the pain that came with it.
"Neteyam?" You asked softly as his eyes instantly flashed to yours, "Well uhm... ithinkimreadytohavesexwithyouagain" Your words were impossible to decipher, your big blue guy staring at you with concerned eyes.
"Are you allr..." he began before you cut him off, softly pressing a finger to his lips.
"I... think" you took a deep breath "I'm ready to uhm.. have sex with you.. again." You murmered as you covered your blush with your hands. "Roughly." You added, your mind straying toward the bruises and hard thrusting you had enjoyed the first time.
Neteyam let out a low growl, "Roughly?" He asked, releasing a shaky sigh as you nodded. "I need to hear you say it y/n," He murmured, grasping your face with your hand.
You let out a whine, "I want you to fill me so deeply i can barely breath,.ah... i want you to take control" you finally moaned out,
Your big blue alien stepped backwards a bit, suddenly loosing his footing.
A huge splash of water rippled the pool as Neteyam stumbled, effectively dunking you both under water, totally disorienting you as you went under.
You both reached the surface of the water at the same time, catching your breath. Neteyam instantly scanning around himself to find you. You letting out a loud laugh as his eyes hit yours, splashing him with a little wave of water.
The tension from before momentarily forgotten as you played in the water.
He gave you a comically insulted look, it quickly turning relieved as he saw your smile. "You little skang!" He yelled as he used his large arm to send you a wave, it washing over you instantly.
"Oh come on, this is not a fair fight!" You exclaimed loudly, teasingly kicking him in the shin.
He let out an exaterated whine before he threw his body toward you picking you up under your arms, him dropping you afterwards. You felt some water enter your nose as you went under, you sputtering slightly in suprise.
He lifted you up again, "Shouldn't have contended me, ma y/n." He murmured into your ear, it a reference to the play water fights you would have as children.
He placed his arms around you softly, you both taking a second to just bask in eachothers presence. His arms settled around you in a way you only saw and felt him.
After a short while you felt his breath turn uneven, "Teyam, you really need oxygen" You warned.
Neteyam hesitantly let you go but finally swam toward the other side of the pool lifting himself on the edge before taking a puff of oxygen from the tank.
He turned to look at you, "That was unexpected." he murmured with an humorous smile on his face. Him obviously meaning the tension and then the tumble you guys just took.
"Now this totally killed my mood here, welp guess we'll just go back to the rest." You shrugged, sarcastically turning away from him and starting to swim away.
"OH no you don't," Neteyam yelled jokingly but not that jokingly at the same time.
You laughed, "Well i suppose you'll have to catch me then!" You taunted him giving him a meaningfull look.
He smirked before he walked over to the edge of the water, peering down on your form a little ways ahead.,
You underestimate me little mate! I'll catch you faster than you think!" He exclaimed loudly as you heard a loud splash behind you, Neteyam giving chase.
You swam toward the shallow end of the pool as quickly as your limbs would allow, slowly making your way toward the ramp, the water now coming up to your waist as you waided through at record speed.
You felt him gain on you,
You slowly kept crawling upward the water splashing loudly as you practically threw yourself forward, adrenaline rushing through your body as you heard the sound of his large body getting closer and closer to your smaller form.
You noticed him reach out to grab you a little too late, you stumbling down on your stomach. You were about to sit up too crawl when you were held down by two large legs pinning you too the ground. His large member sitting right on your ass.
"Got you" Neteyam whispered in your ear as his hands pinned yours to the dry part of the ramp, only your bottom half still fully submerged.
"Well, claim your price then my love" You murmured softly as you jokingly shook your bottom at him. He let out an excited growl, rutting against your body roughly. You letting out a moan as you felt his cock slip down, just missing your clothed entrance as it landed between your folds.
He sat on his knees around your legs, your ass pushed upwards toward him. Neteyam letting out a frustrated sigh and simply tearing off your bra and underwear, you letting out a gasp at the sting of the clothes digging into your skin as they tore. He threw the shreds somewhere to his right before reaching his hand down and placing the head of his cock at your entrance.
You shivered at the sudden sensitivity of your folds. You whimpering as you tried to dig your nails into the tiled pool. You tried to catch your breath from your running, failing immensely.
He pushed in without warning, you dropping yourself on your stomach with a breathless groan as he filled you to the brim. His large member stretching you out instantly, it feeling like it set aflame every sensitive place in your body all at once.
You tried to catch your breath, gasping heavily as your body adjusted to the large intruder. The filled feeling foreign but familiar as you could feel the tip of his cock reach far into you.
He groaned in your ear "You can't run away from me my mate," his breath uneven as he set a sudden harsh pace, his cock pulling all the way out of you before slamming into you again.
You were slowly pushed forward as he thrusted into you, his hands settled on your waist to keep you still.
You whined under him, your cunt a tingling mess as you took him, you feeling him so deep in your body you could see stars. "Oh god, your so deep" You moaned out, not able to keep the words in.
You tried to push yourself up on your underarms, intending to scootch yourself forward a bit. Him sliding out of you a little as you moved away from him.
You were pulled back harshly, a deep voice whispering in your ear. "Stay here" Neteyam demanded as he pulled your arms behind you, your body angling backwards as he slammed into you again, you feeling your belly rub against the tile with every thrust. His pace became more irregulair, you unnable to calculate his next move and completely at his mercy.
This new position drove him right into your sweet spot, your orgasm approaching fast and your eyes growing hazy as your surroundings went blurry. You let out a highpitched moan, your body shaking terribly as your cunt squeezed his cock uncontrollably.
Neteyam let out a feral groan, pushing your body back down practically laying on you as he drove himself in and out of you. He was animalistic as he growled and hugged your body to his in a posessive embrace.
You had never felt him like this, but you couldn't help but like it as he dominated your body in every sense. It was like your mind grew empty for a second, the only thing in your mind the hot pleasure coursing through your veins and the satisfying feeling of fullness in your stomach.
And every time he growled and ground himself into you, you felt yourself floating farther from your body. Your entire being overtaken by him as you let out unfiltered moans. "Oh please, please, please" you heard your voice come out of your throst even when you didn't remember speaking them.
Somewhere in the back of your mind, you really hoped no one would come anywhere near to the back of the human base. It a sure fact that they would hear the absolute massacre taking place. The huge alien rutting into you like a rabid animal, and you taking it like a bitch in heat.
He suddenly slowed down, his pace slower but his thrusts harsher than before as your body was harshly pushed into the tiles, your warm head settled on the cold surface as you let out incoherent words of satisfaction. You were scooted forwards like a rag doll as he moved you at his will. "Yes you are doing so well, my little mate. You are so damn tight." He murmured in your ear again, his warm breath tickling your neck.
You felt him swell up inside of you, your body tingling as Neteyam let out a hoarse moan, his seed spilling inside your womb and pumping it farther into you. The squelching obscene as it echoed through the dark pool.
You felt the knot in your stomach unravel suddenly but harshly as you let out a final moan, your legs shaking even harder than before and your body basically going limp on the tiles. Your brain too fucked out to even think.
The blue light of the pool faded away for a second as black spots covered your vision, a loud ringing filling your ears.
"Y/n, ...re .... allright?" You heard Neteyam ask you something, but your mind struggled to figure out what he had said.
You frowned in confusion as you felt Neteyam shake you a bit, "Y/n..please.. r...ond.." a panicked tone filtered in his words, you feeling his weight lift off of your limbs.
You curled your legs into your chest, placing your arms under yourself but letting out a whimper as you failed to sit up. Your heartbeat soared in your ears, it like a drum as it pounded in your head. His eyes widening as your eyes rolled upward, your vision fading.
"Y/N?" Neteyam's loud shout echoed through your mind. Your eyes shot open, revealing your big blue guy above you you as his palms softly hit your cheeks to keep you awake. "Teyam?" You murmured softly, a relieved look on his face as you acknowledged him.
You felt his arms slip around your body as he gently lifted you of the ground, you blinked.
When you opened your eyes again, you were cradled in Neteyam's arms. Your naked body flush against his. One of his arms holding you steady and the other one supporting your head. You weren't in the pool anymore, now sitting on the tile by your clothes. You stared around with dumbfounded eyes, "W..What happened?" You asked weakly.
Neteyam stared at you with worried eyes "You just didn't respond, i didn't know what to do." He mumbled softly as tears filled his eyes, slowly running down his cheeks. "I was just so worried, I'm so sorry." he murmured into your still damp hair.
You softly pushed your forehead against his, "It's not your fault," You let out a slow breath before sitting up in his arms.
"Why did you pass out? Did i push you too far?" He asked worriedly.
You shook your head, "No, no, not at all, i think i pushed myself too far... you did... amazing."
You leaned forward, softly kissing away his tears. A soft smile circling your lips afterwards, as you softly pressed the tip of your nose to the spots on his face.
"You felt so good, it was like i lost my mind. It was like something came over me." His eyes were still wild, no doubt still calming down from his orgasm.
"I had the same, you really are mine" You murmured in his ear,
Neteyam's eyes met your own again, his eyes soft and so filled with affection you could barely breathe. "I see you." He murmured softly, as he placed his hand on your cheek.
"I see you" you murmured, placing your arms around his warm chest as he did the same. You stayed in his embrace for a while as you both calmed down from your high both in the emotional and in the physical sense.
After a while you both got up, your body aching in so many places you would surely have to check in a mirror later. You slowly put on your clothes, your big blue guy keeping a close eye on you during.
"I really hurt you..." Neteyam murmured as he trailed his fingers over the allready forming bruises on your arms and legs
His fingers slowly brushed over to your neck, his hands tracing a few spots there. "I have marked you here as well." He did seemed pleased at 'that' thought, his stance instantly growing taller as he observed the love bites on your neck.
You finished dressing quite quickly, you both finally ready to sneak out the pool. "Shit" you cursed as you stared at the black nothingness.
Neteyam looked at you in confusion, "What is it?"
"Look outside"
...."Shit"
You quickly grabbed his hand dragging him with you as you entered the dark hallway. Him just allowing himself to move with you as you peered around the narrow passages thankfully able to navigate in the dark.
"We have to move quickly here" you murmured as you stuck your head out into the main hall, quickly peering around to see if you saw any scientists wandering around thankfully seeing the corridor entirely empty.
You pulled him into the hallway, slowly crouching/crawling under the windows to the labs, you knowing that some of the human workers liked to work late.
You had no idea what time it was, but you sincerily hoped it wasn't past nine yet. Neytiri, Jake and Norm would trow a fit if they appeared past curfew again.
The pair of you slowly neared the avatar room where the big metal door leading outside was located, his big blue form sticking out like a sore thumb as they sneaked past the various hallways leading there.
You crouched beside the doorframe, peering into the room. It was silent in there safe for the occasional snore, you looking back at Neteyam to see if he heard anything. He gave you a silent nod, slowly moving in front of you this time as he grasped your smaller hand in his to guide you forward. You both sneaking past the giant tanks, one of them containing Kiri's mother..which was honestly quite weird.
You finally had the door in sight, Neteyam reaching forward to grab the handle as you both stood up. "Goodni...." you were interupted by his lips on your own as his large hand cupped your face. You gasped as his tongue entered your mouth, him groaning as your teeth grazed his lips.
You felt yourself get carried away, him apparently having the same problem as he harshly slammed your back against the wall. Your legs wrapped around his waist pulling him toward you as his hands roughly kneaded your behind.
"Okay... we... should.. really stop" You mumbled between kisses. Neteyam only letting out an dejected moan before unwillingly pulling away from you, softly setting you back down on your feet.
"I shall see you tommorow" He murmured giving you one last kiss and stepping out the door.
Your private moment being way less private than the both of you thought.
(Welp! That was part two! Again please let me know if you liked it! I think I will only do a part 3 if you guys want me to! Also let me know if i need to be more descriptive, I am sometimes not sure if i put enough.)
Link to part 3:
Link to part 1!:
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Fluff Masterlist
pure fluff: 💕 hurt/comfort: ❤️‍🩹 smut: 💟 (soft) 💦 (explicit)
hi i think the original post is getting too long and tumblr won't let me save it so this is my attempt at compromising
main masterlist
hcs/drabbles:
➼ attention-starved!levi (drabble) 💕 ➼ attention-starved!levi (headcanons) 💕 ➼ bff!levi comforting you when your friends are being shitty 💕 ➼ blind date by mutual friend 💕 ➼ cat-dad!levi 💕 ➼ celebrating your birthday with a date 💕 ➼ cuddling on a day off 💕 ➼ cuddling when snowed in 💕 ➼ dadvi canonverse headcanons 💕 ➼ date where you take a walk on the docks and go for a drive 💕 ➼ date where you travel outside of the walls 💕 ➼ dinner and music date in marley 💕 ➼ eating ice cream for the first time 💕 ➼ friend date on top of the walls that leads to a confession 💕 ➼ general headcanons on dating levi 💕 ➼ getting levi a power washer 💕 ➼ going to a carnival with bff!levi that ends up being a shitshow 💕 ➼ going to the carnival for the first time 💕 ➼ giving levi first aid 💕 ➼ grocery shopping with levi 💕 ➼ just some domestic modern!au headcanons 💕 ➼ kissing post-war!levi’s scars 💕
➼ levi and physical touch 💕 ➼ levi being stubborn with you after an injury 💕 ➼ levi catching you after you get yeeted by a Titan 💕 ➼ levi comforts you after you think he’s sick of you ❤️‍🩹 ➼ levi confessing by calling you his 💕 ➼ levi confessing on NYE 💕 ➼ levi helps you with your gear after you get injured 💕 ➼ levi getting a phone 💕 ➼ levi noticing that you're getting overstimmed 💕 ➼ levi noticing you about to have a panic attack 💕 ➼ levi rushing home after hearing gunshots through the phone 💕 ➼ levi saying he doesn’t want to lose you ❤️‍🩹 ➼ levi scolding you for not getting first aid 💕 ➼ levi soothing your crying toddler 💕 ➼ levi taking care of drunk!reader 💕 ➼ levi taking care of your newborn baby 💕 ➼ levi taking his twin daughters to the beach 💕 ➼ levi telling you that you’re perfect just the way you are ❤️‍🩹 ➼ levi with modern!au gadgets 💕 ➼ levi with twin daughters (hcs) 💕 ➼ morning cuddles with levi 💕 ➼ picnic date 💕 ➼ post-war!levi chasing after your toddler 💕 ➼ random levi thoughts 💕 ➼ touch-starved!levi having to wake up without you next to him 💕💟 ➼ touch-starved!levi that misses you after a week without you 💕💟 ➼ wearing levi’s shirt when having a bad day 💕 ➼ wedding planning with levi 💕 ➼ you and levi discussing having a baby 💕💟 ➼ you and levi take your baby out for a stroll in Marley 💕 ➼ you being stubborn with levi after an injury 💕 ➼ you dragging jealous!levi onto the dance floor 💕 ➼ you telling levi that he’s more than likeable 💕
oneshots:
➼ A Clean Cut 💕
Years after the end of the war, your son asks Levi to cut his hair.
➼ Come Home with Me Tonight 💕
You and Levi were nothing more than friends with benefits. However, upon seeing you at a formal with a date, things quickly begin to change.
➼ Come to Bed 💕
Your attention has been limited, making Levi more than grumpy.
➼ Fucked Out 💦 💕
After getting fucked stupid by Levi, he helps you clean up and provides you with gentle aftercare.
➼ I Do 💕
You run into your ex-boyfriend after years and realize that your feelings had never faded.
➼ It Was Always You 💕
You were a princess with an unwanted duty. He was the knight that saved your life. Tired of hiding behind a ruse, you finally confess.
➼ Just Being You 💕
Levi attempts to explain the Rumbling to your 6-year-old child.
➼ Just Go ❤️‍🩹
After a fight, you're convinced that Levi's going to break up with you.
➼ Keeping You Safe ❤️‍🩹
You get hurt during the 57th Scouting Expedition and are confronted by Levi.
➼ Peace 💕
With the war finally over, you and Levi struggle to adjust to normal life. You attend a fall festival in an attempt to cope with the day.
➼ Stay With Me 💕
It's the night before your battle with the Jaeger brothers. Pressed for time, Levi finally confesses.
➼ Surprises ❤️‍🩹
You were convinced that Levi was cheating. He instead comes home with a surprise.
➼ The Short King 💕💟
You run into Levi after coming out of the shower after avoiding him and are forced to navigate your budding feelings for him.
➼ The Usual 💕
You're a regular in Levi's teashop. He makes a promise to get to know you.
➼ Want 💕
Levi begins berating you for getting injured. It isn't until later that it was because he had feelings for you all along.
➼ Who You Are 💕
Your depression hits harder than usual. Levi helps you through it.
➼ World's Grumpiest Dad 💕
You reveal your pregnancy to Levi with an unironic gift.
➼ You're Safe ❤️‍🩹
Levi raises his voice, which triggers your previous memories. Aware of your past, Levi helps you through it.
➼ Your Promise (kinda fluff kinda angst idk)
It's the night before the return to Shiganshina. Afraid of losing you, Levi attempts to take you off the mission.
➼ Your Safe Space ❤️‍🩹
You struggle holding back an incoming mood swing. Levi encourages you not to hold it back.
➼ Your Worth ❤️‍🩹
Upset about constantly coming in second place, you request to get removed off Levi's squad, and Levi isn't having any of it.
Last updated: March 9, 2024
© humanitys-strongest-bamf & rydenkat | Do not repost or plagiarize my work. Do not translate or edit without my permission. Do not feed my work into AI. My work is currently posted exclusively on Wattpad, AO3, and Tumblr. Feel free to recommend my works on other social media platforms!
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cutecurly-hair · 1 month
Text
Hearts Unleashed (Part 6)
Pairing: Nick Nelson x Black!fem!reader
Warning: Fluff, Smut in later chapters, Body Shaming
Words: 6,417
Tumblr media
It has been a minute since I uploaded, but I made it up to yall by making this chapter a LOT longer. Enjoy!
"You don't know what you're talking about," I finished as I bit into my banana. Charlie rolled his eyes for the fifth time this morning, taking a bit of his breakfast sandwich and throwing the rest in the garbage.
"I swear your love life needs some proper tending to or it is just going to end up nonexistent,"
"How can you throw that away, I could have finished it for you," I protested, looking at banana resentfully. Mother only gives me fruits for breakfast or protein bars since she thinks having carbs first thing in the morning is terrible for the diet.
Charlie shook his head, his expression a mix of amusement "The sandwich was terrible, you wouldn't like it," which I knew was a lie.
"Ok enough about me, what about you! How are you and that guy you were talking with I completely forgot his name," Charlie face fell, quickly regretting on even asking.
Charlie scratched his head, a sheepish grin appearing on his face. "Um, actually, I decided to break things off."
I blinked, surprised by his response. "You did? Why?"
Charlie sighed; his expression somber. "It's just… things weren't working out between us. We wanted different things, and it was causing too much strain on the relationship. If there was even a relationship"
"I'm sorry to hear that," I said, genuinely feeling for him. "Are you okay?"
He nodded, though his smile was wistful. "Yeah, I'll be fine. It's for the best, really."
I reached out, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "If you need anything, I'm here for you, Charlie."
"Thanks, Y/N," he said, his voice appreciative. "I appreciate that." I knew something was up, he had that look on his face far too long, I can tell it's starting to eat him up badly.
As we walked towards the school gates, I noticed a gathering of the rugby team, and my heart sank as I recognized Nick among them. And standing right beside him was Imogen.
"Just when you think things couldn't get any worse," I muttered under my breath.
Charlie's expression darkened as he caught sight of them too. "Of all the days..."
I could feel Charlie's stare intensely at the side of my skull, his concern palpable. It was clear that seeing Nick and Imogen was the last thing I needed on top of everything else.
"Do you want to, you know, avoid them?" Charlie asked quietly, already knowing the answer.
I let out a resigned sigh. "I wish we could, but unfortunately I have practice with him after school." We haven't talked ever since that night, he hasn't messaged me, and I haven't messaged him. It seems that everything has been put on pause I swear this boy is just giving me a straight whiplash to Tara Jones and now Imogen.
"You can probably ditch," Charlie suggested, offering a glimmer of hope. "I'm sure Coach Singh won't mind, plus I can probably cover for you."
The thought of skipping practice tempted me, but then I remembered the inevitable consequence: being bombarded by my mother's relentless fitness regimen. She had been devouring articles on quick weight loss methods before spring started, and I wasn't ready to endure another lecture about healthy living.
I shook my head firmly. "Nope, I will definitely be at practice. I'll just head to the library and study while I wait for them to finish, then clean the locker room." he nodded in understanding.
"Thanks, Charlie," I said sincerely, feeling grateful for his support. But as I glanced over at Nick, I noticed him saying something to Imogen, causing her cheeks to flush with a bright smile. My mouth turned sour, and I quickly grabbed Charlie's arm, leading him through the gates.
"Let's go before we miss out on breakfast from the cafeteria," I urged, my tone a little more urgent than intended.
Charlie furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "But we just ate?"
I swallowed hard, my stomach tying into knots. "I'm still hungry,"
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +
Anywhere else in the world would be better than this classroom right now. I sink into my seat, doing everything I can to avoid looking at the one person I wish I could avoid the most.
I should have just skipped school entirely
"Hi,"
I glanced up reluctantly, meeting Nick's gaze. His smile was warm, but it only intensified the knot in my stomach.
"Hi," I replied, keeping my tone neutral.
His brow furrowed slightly, sensing my unease. "Is everything okay?"
I forced a smile, hoping it looked convincing. "Yeah, everything's fine. Just not feeling great today."
There was a moment of hesitation in his expression before he spoke again, his voice softer this time. "Do you want to go to Harry's party... with me?"
My heart skipped a beat at his unexpected invitation. I blinked, caught off guard "I don't think it's my type of thing and if it's for Harry definitely count me out," The guy was just a straight up asshole, there is nothing that nothing that I can make me like the man, especially with the awful things he says.
"Please come. I want you to be there," he looked at me hopefully, and I couldn't ignore the sincerity in his eyes. It almost hurt to see him like this, his vulnerability making me soften.
"Okay," I smiled sheepishly, feeling a little guilty for giving in so easily. I could practically feel Charlie's eyes boring into the side of my head, likely already knowing that I was about to agree.
---
"I can't believe you did that," Charlie sighed, shaking his head. "I swear, you have the willpower of a peanut."
I chuckled nervously, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up my neck. "Yeah, well… he practically begged me. There's no way I could have said no."
Charlie raised an eyebrow, a skeptical look on his face. "Begged you, huh? Sounds like quite the convincing argument."
I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. "Well, you know Nick. He can be quite persuasive when he wants to be."
Charlie sighed, shaking his head in mock disbelief. "I swear, you're like putty in his hands."
I rolled my eyes but couldn't help the small smile tugging at my lips. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. But I'm sure it'll be fine. Especially since you're coming with me."
Charlie raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Wait, what? I didn't agree to that."
I grinned, nudging him playfully. "Come on, Charlie. You can't let me face this party alone. Besides, it'll be more bearable with you there."
He sighed dramatically but smiled back. "Fine, I'll go. But only because I don't trust you to stay out of trouble on your own."
"Deal," I said, feeling a bit more confident about the party with Charlie by my side.
----------
The afternoon sun was beginning to set as Charlie and I rummaged through my closet, looking for something decent to wear to Harry’s party. My room was a mess, clothes strewn everywhere as we tried to find the perfect outfit.
Charlie held up a shirt, scrutinizing it before tossing it aside. “This one’s too plain. You need something that stands out.”
I groaned, flopping down on my bed. “I don’t even know why I agreed to this. Harry’s parties are always so... Harry.”
Charlie laughed, shaking his head. “Agree, but you’re doing this for Nick, remember? And besides, it’ll be good to get out and have some fun.”
I shot him a skeptical look. “You think hanging out with Harry and his crowd is fun?”
He thought for a moment, pulling out a vibrant top from the pile. "Absolutely not but we must preserve. But at least you won’t be alone. We’ll stick together.”"
I took the top from him, eyeing it critically. “Alright, I guess this could work. What about you? What are you wearing?”
He smirked, holding up a simple yet stylish outfit. “Already got it covered. Unlike you, I came prepared.”
I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help but smile. “Show-off.”
Charlie threw a pillow at me, laughing. “Hey, someone’s got to keep us looking decent.”
As I changed into the outfit he picked, Charlie sat on the edge of my bed, giving me a thumbs-up when I emerged from behind the closet door. “See? You look great. Nothing to worry about”
Just then, Charlie's phone buzzed, and I noticed his smile falter as he looked at the screen.
"Shit!" he muttered under his breath.
I turned to him, concerned. "What’s wrong?"
"Tao and Elle just texted me about film night tonight! I completely forgot," typing furiously on his phone.
Trying to lighten the mood, I suggested, "Hey, why don't we invite Tao and Elle? Nick definitely won't mind."
Charlie shook his head, a wry smile playing on his lips. "Tao would rather be caught dead than step foot into one of Harry's parties."
I laughed, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, you're right. But it’d be nice to have them around."
Charlie sighed, glancing at his phone again. "It's fine. Elle's going over there, and Isaac called in sick. He'll be okay," he said, slipping the phone into his back pocket.
I could already tell I was at the very top of Tao's shit list, and it wasn’t about to get any better.
We were halfway out the door when my mom's voice rang out, stopping us in our tracks.
"Do you kids need a ride?" she asked, looking up from her magazine with a hint of concern in her eyes.
I shook my head, forcing a smile. "No, thanks. Charlie's dad already offered to give us a lift."
"Alright then," she said, her gaze sweeping over my outfit. I can feel the eyes pouring at every single detail of what I was wearing, I knew she wouldn't say anything infront Charlie, she wouldn't do that to me "But honey, make sure to suck in your stomach. It looks a little chubby."
I was wrong
My cheeks burned with embarrassment as I forced a smile. "Got it, Mom."
Charlie gave me a sympathetic glance, his eyes full of understanding. "Ready?" he asked, trying to shift the mood.
"Yea," I replied, taking a deep breath, rushing out the door. "Let's get out of here."
As we stepped outside, the cool evening air hit my face, and I felt a mix of relief and lingering embarrassment. Charlie nudged me playfully.
"Don't let it get to you," he said with a grin. "You look great."
I smiled, grateful for his support. "Lets have some fun."
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +
"Pick up at 10, okay?" Mr. Springer said, glancing back at us in the rearview mirror.
I nodded absentmindedly, my attention drawn to the enormous house outside. The place was massive had Harry really rented out an entire hotel? Just how rich was he?
Charlie’s voice broke through my thoughts. "Can't it be 11?" he pleaded, looking at his dad hopefully.
"No, 10 is late enough," Mr. Springer replied firmly.
Charlie sighed, looking defeated as he got out of the car. "Fine," he muttered.
I quickly followed suit, turning back to say goodbye to Mr. Spring. "Thanks for the ride!"
"Have fun, you two!" he called after us as we stepped into the cool evening.
The smell of cheap perfume and artificial vape flavors filled my nose. There was a long line of people, and everywhere I looked, girls were squeezed into tight dresses, their faces caked with makeup. I started to wonder if we were at the right party. Thank God Charlie helped me pick out my outfit, or I would have stood out like a sore thumb.
Charlie nudged me with a grin. "I could have used your help back there, you know?"
I shot him a flabbergasted look. "You're crazy if you think I was going to argue with your dad."
Charlie laughed, shaking his head. "Fair enough. But you owe me one."
I rolled my eyes playfully. "Yeah, yeah. Let's just get inside before I change my mind."
We joined the line, inching our way forward as the music thumped louder with every step. The hotel loomed above us, lights flashing from every window, just from taking a peek inside I can definitely tell that Harry went all out.
We stepped inside, the noise and lights hitting us full force. People were everywhere, dancing, laughing, and shouting to be heard over the music. I didn't know which way to look; it was so crowded. Charlie grabbed the hem of my top so he wouldn't get lost in the crowd. My palms were starting to sweat.
The sheer volume of people and the pulsing music made my head spin. Charlie leaned close to my ear, his voice barely audible over the noise. "Let'd find somewhere quiet I can barely hear myself think."
I nodded, my heart pounding feeling the bass within my body. We pushed through the throng of people, dodging couples and groups of friends. Every corner seemed to hold a new spectacle: a group of girls taking selfies, a guy attempting an impressive but ultimately disastrous dance move. The flashing lights made my head feel fuzzy.
I was already overstimluted and I haven't been here for five minutes. "Do you want to get a drink?"
He nodded in agreement. "Good idea. I swear, did Harry invite the whole city?" Charlie looked frazzled; it seemed he wasn't doing any better than me.
We walked down a quieter hallway, only a few people milling about. "You stay here; I'll go get the drinks," Charlie said, glancing back at me with a smile.
I nodded gratefully, leaning against the wall to catch my breath, trying to ignore the overpowering smell of smoke and alcohol that filled my nose. Charlie disappeared into the crowd, and I took a moment to collect myself, looking at myself in the mirror. My curls seemed to be frizzing up from the humidity, and I quickly ran my fingers through them, trying to tame the wild strands.
Nearby, a table was filled with enough snacks and drinks to feed an army. I made my way over, deciding a quick bite might help settle my nerves. Mother would actually kill me if she saw me eating this stuff.
I grabbed a handful of chips and popped them into my mouth, the salty crunch grounding me a bit. I picked up a cup of the red liquid and took a gulp, but quickly grimaced at the terrible aftertaste.
Looking around the room, trying not to get knocked down by stumbling people who had clearly had enough to drink, I spotted a familiar face in the crowd. I could feel the heat rising in my face as I realized it was Nick.
Spotting me instantly, a look of relief filled his face. He started making his way through the crowd. "I have been looking for you!" we said in unison.
Even in the chaos of the party, I couldn’t help but notice how good he looked. His hair was perfectly tousled, and his smile lit up his eyes, making my heart skip a beat. He had this way of making me feel like I was the only person in the room. I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks. No matter how overwhelming things got, just seeing him made everything easier.
Nick and I exchanged a warm smile, “How about we go grab a drink?” he suggested, his voice soft but somehow cutting through the noise.
“Yeah, that sounds good,” I agreed, feeling a little more at ease with him by my side.
We made our way through the crowded room, and every time someone bumped into me, Nick would gently place his hand on my back, guiding me forward. It was such a small gesture, but I couldn’t ignore the tingling sensation it left behind.
Finally, we reached the drinks table, a mix of colorful concoctions laid out before us. Nick picked up a couple of cups, handing one to me with a playful grin. “I think this one’s safe,” he said, making me think back to that horrid red liquid from earlier.
I laughed, taking the cup from him. “Let’s hope so. I had one earlier, and I swear I thought it was roofied.”
He immediately looked concerned. "Sorry about that. I forgot how some of Harry's parties can get kind of crazy. I was even debating whether to come," he admitted, staring down at the red cup like it was the bane of his existence.
"It's alright, really," I reassured him. "It’s good to hang out with your friends."
Nick shrugged, a small, honest smile tugging at his lips. "Ehh, they're not my 'friends friends.' It's a lot more fun hanging out with you."
I tried not to let my surprise show, but his words caught me off guard. The idea that he’d rather spend time with me than his usual Rugby buddies made my heart flutter. “Really?” I asked, trying to keep my tone casual, though I could feel my face warming.
“Yeah, really,” he said, meeting my eyes with a sincerity that made my chest tighten. “I always have more fun when you’re around. Those guys are great, but they’re not...” he was trying to find the words
“Fun?” I offered with a teasing smile.
Nick’s eyes trailed off, lingering on mine for a moment longer before he nodded slowly. “Well, there’s never really a dull moment with you,” he said with a mischievous grin, “so I tend to keep you close. You know, just in case things get too boring I need someone to liven things up.”
I laughed, shaking my head. “So, I’m your emergency backup for fun?”
“Exactly,” he said, nodding with exaggerated seriousness. “In case this party sucks, I know who just to call .”
I playfully nudged him. “And here I thought you just enjoyed my company.”
“I do,” he said, leaning in slightly with a playful grin. “I just need someone to keep me entertained”
I laughed, shaking my head. “Well, I’m flattered to be your go-to for fun. I have to say, your backup plan is working pretty well tonight.”
Nick grinned, shaking his head. “I’m just glad that your here, I swear I barely know anyone here"
Trying to play it cool, even though I was secretly thrilled that Nick was happy to see me, we made our way to a quieter corner of the party. We found a spot away from everything, where we could actually sit and talk without having to shout over the music.
"You know," Nick started with a grin, "I’ve been forcing my mum to play Mario Kart ever since you absolutely destroyed me at that game. Thought I might finally get a win somewhere."
I burst out laughing, nearly spilling my drink. "You’re practicing with your mum? That’s dedication! Even for you?"
"I'm being serious," Nick replied, his tone earnest. "I’ve never seen anyone play that good. You completely embrassed me"
I grinned, feeling a bit of pride. "Well, I’m glad I could leave such an impression. Guess all those hours of practice paid off."
Nick shook his head, still looking amazed. "You don’t understand. I’ve never been so thoroughly beaten at anything in my life. It was like you had cheat codes or something."
"Just pure skill," I teased, giving him a playful nudge. "Maybe next time I’ll teach you how to win," I teased, then quickly realized it sounded more flirtatious than I intended.
"I—"
Before he could finish, someone called out, “Nick!” From the number of times I’d heard that voice at practice, I could almost smell the narcissism dripping from it. Nick’s expression shifted to mild annoyance as he glanced over his shoulder.
“All right, mate,” Nick said, eyeing Harry up and down with a look of uneasy tolerance. Despite the size of the place, it seemed Harry’s presence was as unavoidable as ever.
“Why are you hanging out here? Bit boring, innit?” Harry asked, his gaze directly fixed on me. The group behind him exchanged knowing glances, their eyes lingering on me with an air of smugness. I shot him a withering glare, not liking where this was going.
Nick shot me a worried look, trying to diffuse the tension. “We just are”
Harry smirked, flopping down on the couch next to Nick and draping an arm around him as if marking his territory. “I’ve got important news for you,” he announced with exaggerated enthusiasm.
“Yeah, what?” Nick asked, clearly uninterested but trying to play along.
"Tara Jones is here" he annoucned gaining the ooos from the boys. My breath hitched, and a sinking feeling settled in my stomach. I knew coming here might have been a mistake.
Nick’s expression turned to confusion. “So, what?”
Harry looked around as if he couldn’t believe on what he was hearing. “This is your big second chance, mate. Let’s make it happen,” he said with a chuckle, Harry looking over at me "They kissed when they were thirteen. Proper romantic" egging on crowd. He says it like I have been dying to know but all I want to do right now is disapear.
“He should go for it, right?” Harry asked, his words dripping with smugness as he pretended to care about my opinion. I could see the tension building in Nick, his discomfort almost palpable. My own irritation was rising fast, and I was seconds away from telling Harry to back off, because if there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s seeing Nick put on the spot like this.
"Come on, mate," Harry urged, tugging at Nick's arm to pull him up from the couch.
"Harry—" Nick started, his voice laced with protest.
"Come on. She’s just down the corridor,” Harry insisted, ignoring Nick’s reluctance.
Nick hesitated, clearly uncomfortable. "I haven't talked to her in years."
"So? She's super hot, man," Harry insisted, not letting up.
Nick barely had time to respond before Harry turned toward the crowd, calling out, "All right, ladies!" His voice carried through the room, gathering curious glances.
My stomach twisted as Harry’s words sliced through the noise, “Hey, Tara! I've got someone who wants to see you!” I glanced over, and there she was stunning in a way that made it hard to look away. My chest tightened as her eyes locked onto Nick, her smile effortlessly brightening the room. I could feel my heart sinking, a wave of insecurity washing over me. Tara wasn’t just beautiful; she was the kind of beautiful that made me question what I was even doing here.
The music drowned out their voices, but I could still see the way Tara’s eyes lit up as Nick talked to her. A tight knot formed in my chest as I watched, feeling like an outsider in a scene I didn’t belong in.
I’m so pathetic, I thought, standing here, just watching.
I slipped away, disappearing down the corridor, hoping to lose myself in the crowd and escape the sinking feeling in my gut. As I tried to shake off the unease, someone stepped in front of me.
“Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know where Charlie Spring is, would you?”
I glanced up, recognizing the boy but struggling to place his name. “No, actually, I’ve been looking for him too,” I admitted. After a beat, I added, “And you’re…?”
He smiled, looking a bit bashful. “Ben. We met a while back when you were trying to find the film club.”
It clicked, and I nodded, a small smile creeping onto my face. “Oh, right! I remember now. I can’t believe you still remember me,” I said, laughing a bit, though I couldn’t help but feel a bit flustered.
He chuckled softly, “You’re pretty hard to forget…” There was something in his tone that made the words linger, and I found myself blushing slightly.
A warm flush spread up my neck, I honestly had no idea how to respond to that, so I just offered a shy smile. My mind racing for something to say.
Ben’s smile widened, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “So, what are you doing hiding out back here? The party too wild for you?”
I shrugged, glancing back toward the crowd where Nick was still talking to Tara. “Yeah, something like that,” I mumbled. “Just needed a break from all the noise.”
Ben followed my gaze, his expression turning a bit more serious. “Ah, I see. Sometimes these things can be a bit... much.”
I appreciated his attempt to empathize, even if he didn’t know the half of it. “Yeah,” I agreed, nodding. “It’s just one of those nights, I guess.”
Ben seemed to sense my discomfort and shifted the conversation. “Well, if you ever need to disappear for a while, you can always come hang out with me. I’m more of a ‘quiet corner’ kind of guy myself.”
I smiled at that, feeling a little less alone. “Thanks, Ben. I might just take you up on that.”
Catching something in the corner of his eye, he gives me a fleeting smile and then quietly excuses himself. “I’ll catch you later,” he says, before slipping away, leaving me by myself…again.
Finding a lone couch off to the side, I flopped down onto it, feeling like I might as well get a goddamn trophy for being the lamest person in the room. I pulled out my phone, scrolling through notifications that didn’t interest me, my eyes glazing over texts from friends from back home and ignoring the persistent messages from my mother. Only an hour left before Charlie's dad picks us up. Time seemed to crawl, each minute stretching into an eternity.
I sighed, sinking deeper into the cushions, trying to disappear into the background.
"Hi," a familiar voice cut through the noise. I looked up to see Nick standing in front of me, his hands shoved awkwardly into his pockets. He offered a small, hesitant smile, as if unsure of whether he was welcome.
“Hey,” I replied, sitting up a bit straighter, surprised he’d sought me out again.
"You left."
"Sorry, I was just... starting to feel out of place. The guys can be somewhat intimidating," I admitted, my voice trailing off as I glanced at the crowd. It was a bit of the truth, but it didn’t fully capture how overwhelmed I felt.. Not like I am going to tell him that I have a crush on him, that would certainly make matter worse.
He shook his head, a subtle furrow creasing his brow. "Don’t be sorry," he said firmly, his tone edged with genuine concern. "Half of them are just... dickheads. I’m tired of being around them. I'd much rather hang out with you." His words were sincere, his gaze steady.
This was the second time I heard him say that, and I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face. But as the reality of his words sank in, a flicker of fear ran through me this was real, and that scared me.
I turned my gaze, my smile slipping as my heart raced. What if I was misreading this? What if he was just being nice? My thoughts tangled, and the crowd seemed to close in on me, the noise growing louder and more intense.
Just as I felt myself sinking, Nick reached out and took my hand. The warmth of his touch was immediate, grounding me in the present. His thumb gently brushed against the back of my hand, and I looked up to find his eyes still on me.
"Shall we go somewhere quieter?" he asked, his voice soft yet firm, offering me an escape.
I hesitated for a moment, my mind still reeling, but the gentle pressure of his hand, the way his fingers intertwined with mine, made the decision for me. I nodded, feeling a wave of relief wash over me as I let him lead the way.
As we moved away from the noise, the tension in my chest began to ease. Nick glanced back at me with a playful smile, a glint of mischief in his eyes.
"You want to race?" he teased, the challenge evident in his voice.
I couldn’t help but grin back at him. "You want to race me?" I repeated, already taking a quick step forward to get a head start, my laughter bubbling up as I broke into a run.
"Come on!" I called out over my shoulder, the thrill of the chase energizing my every step.
"Wait, stop!" he shouted, his voice tinged with both surprise and amusement as he sprinted after me, his footsteps echoing up the stairs.
"Unfair, you got a head start," he called out, his mock outrage only making me laugh harder.
"I'm dying!" Nick shouted, his voice breathless yet filled with laughter. I couldn’t believe it the star of the rugby team, gasping and trailing behind me in a race. The thought sent another burst of giggles through me as I glanced back to see him trying to catch up, his grin just as wide as mine.
"Am I hearing an old man complaining?" I teased, slowing down just a bit, but not enough to let him close the gap completely. The sight of Nick, usually so composed and confident, now playfully struggling to keep up, was a rare and delightful reversal that made me wish that we could run just a little while longer.
As we finally reached the top of the stairs, our breath still catching, pushing open the doors
We stepped inside, and I felt my breath catch again, but this time for an entirely different reason.
The grand ballroom before us was stunning. The ceiling reached up high, covered with detailed paintings, their colors bright even in the soft light of the chandeliers that looked like stars. The walls were lined with tall mirrors in fancy frames, reflecting the golden light and making the room feel even bigger.
Nick let out a low whistle, clearly as awestruck as I was. "Wow," he breathed, his voice echoing slightly in the vast space.
Nick shaking his head in disbelief. "Jesus, I knew Harry was rich, but this hotel must have cost him a fuck ton of money," he muttered, his tone a mix of awe and amusement.
I couldn’t help but laugh, the sound echoing softly in the grand room. "No kidding," I replied, glancing around at the opulence surrounding us. "I feel like this place matches his ego big and obnoxious."
Nick snorted, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "Yeah, it’s like he’s trying to outdo himself every time. Next thing you know, he’ll be renting out the Eiffel Tower"
I grinned, imagining the absurdity of it. I found a spot against the wall and sank down, admiring the shimmering lights and grandeur of the room. Nick settled beside me, his gaze following mine, but my thoughts were stuck on that moment from earlier. The way he looked at me, the way he said he’d rather hang out with me I couldn’t shake it. It felt like I was becoming delusional, this constant flutter of hope mixed with doubt. I just needed to know, one way or another, so I could either put this silly crush to rest.
"So..." I started, trying to sound casual, but the slight tremor in my voice betrayed me. "Was Harry being serious? Do you like Tara?"
The words felt heavy as they left my mouth, like they were dragging something deeper out into the open. I didn’t know if I was ready to hear the answer, but I had to ask.
Nick's eyes practically bulged out of their sockets. "What? No! No, definitely not," he blurted out, his voice rising in pitch with each word. The intensity of his reaction caught me off guard, making me question why I’d ever worried in the first place.
There was an awkward silence that hung in the air, thick and heavy. I fidgeted with my hands, suddenly hyper-aware of the tension between us.
"Uh… So… you don't have a crush on anyone at the moment?" I asked, trying to keep my tone casual, though my heart was pounding in my chest. I forced myself to meet his gaze, hoping to find some clue in his expression.
He looked away from my gaze, his eyes shifting to the glimmering chandeliers above us. "Well, I didn't say that," he murmured, a hint of something unspoken lingering in his voice.
"Oh," I managed to say, though the disappointment in my voice was unmistakable. It felt as if the air had thickened, the silence resuming its heavy presence as if it had never left. The excitement and playfulness from earlier faded, leaving behind a quietness that neither of us seemed to know how to break.
I broke the quiet first, curiosity tinged with a hint of nervousness. “So, what’s she like, then?”
Nick’s eyes flickered up to meet mine, a trace of uncertainty shadowing his face. “You’re just going to assume they’re a ‘she’?”
“Oh,” I said, my voice softening with realization. “Are they… are they not a girl?”
He hesitated, his gaze drifting to the elegant patterns on the floor. “Um…”
I leaned in slightly, trying to read his expression. “Would you go out with someone who wasn’t a girl?”
Nick’s lips twisted into a thoughtful frown. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
I pressed on gently, my heart pounding. “Would you kiss someone who wasn’t a girl?”
He met my eyes again, his expression a mix of confusion and vulnerability. “I think… I think I might. But I’m not entirely sure yet.”
I nodded in understanding, my mind processing Nick's words. I was genuinely touched that he trusted me enough to share this, but the relief I expected didn’t quite come. Instead, a mix of embrassement and lingering dread churned inside me. The fear of complicating things or making him uncomfortable gnawed at me, my feelings for him never leaving.
“But I wouldn’t mind going out with a girl,” he said, his voice steady but revealing a hint of uncertainty. My head snapped up, meeting his eyes.
He continued, “I wouldn’t mind kissing a girl either.” His eyes searched mine, looking for a reaction. I didn’t know what to say. I turned to him, the question on the tip of my tongue, but the words wouldn’t come out.
His hand was so close to mine, just an inch apart; I could practically feel his warmth. The proximity made it hard to think straight, each moment stretching longer as I struggled to keep my composure. Our fingers were touching, and neither of us pulled away.
Nick glanced down at our intertwined fingers, his gaze lingering on them. He swallowed hard, his nervousness palpable. I took a deep breath, gathering my courage, and finally asked,
“Would you kiss me?”
Nick leaned in closer, tightening his hold on my hand. His voice was soft but steady. “Yeah,” he said, his eyes locked onto mine.
The distance between us shrinking until it was almost nothing. His lips hovered near mine, and I could feel his breath, warm and soft, tickling my skin. My heart raced, a wild, fluttery feeling in my chest as I waited, anticipation buzzing in the air around us.
His lips met mine in a sweet, delicate kiss that sent a rush of warmth through me. It was soft and tentative, like he was savoring every second. My senses where filled with his signature scent, the one that I have missed so much. The familiarity of it made my heart ache in the best way, and I found myself melting into the kiss, wanting to hold onto this moment forever.
Pulling away slowing we looked away from each other, I could hardly believe it Nick Nelson had just kissed me. I’d just had my first kiss… and I liked it.
Really liked it
I glanced over at him, my heart still racing, but he was already looking at me, his eyes soft and searching, as if he was trying to gauge my reaction. The realization that this moment was real, that it had actually happened, made my heart swell with something indescribable.
Without thinking, I reached out, my hand finding the back of his neck, and pulled him closer. I kissed him deeply, pouring everything I was feeling into that moment. He responded by pulling me in tighter, his arms wrapping around me as if he didn’t want to let go, the intensity of the kiss growing with every second. It was as if all the emotions we had been holding back finally found their release in that one, perfect moment.
I could hardly breathe when we finally pulled apart. Staring at him, I just couldn't look away.
"Are you okay?" I asked softly, my voice barely above a whisper.
"1..." he began to say, but was cut off by the sound of Harry's voice echoing down the hallway.
"Nick, are you here?" Harry called out, his voice drawing closer. Nick's body tensed instantly, the warmth between us replaced by a sudden rush of panic.
"I just want to talk, mate," Harry's voice came closer, more insistent.
Nick pulled away immediately, standing up with a look of sheer panic. He glanced anxiously at the door, his body flinching at each echo of footsteps in the hallway.
"Why are you hiding?!" Harry's voice called out, growing louder and more frustrated.
Nick's gaze was locked on the door, his anxiety clear. Without a word, he took a final, fleeting glance at me an expression of regret or maybe apology flitting across his face. Then, he bolted out, disappearing through the door just as Harry's footsteps grew closer.
The sudden silence that followed was deafening. I sat there, trying to process what had just happened. The kiss had been amazing, but now it felt like a distant, shattered dream.
I felt confused, the warmth of the kiss now gone. My mind was filled with unanswered questions and a sudden ache. It felt like the ground had moved under me, leaving me with just the memory of his touch.
As I tried to steady my breath, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Glancing at the screen, I saw multiple messages from Charlie asking where I was and letting me know that his dad had arrived.
Banging my head gently against the wall, I couldn’t believe how quickly the night had gone from one of the most memorable to one of the worst.
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mvltixcc · 7 months
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Girls Like Girls - Robin Buckley X Cheerleader!Reader
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Summary: Robin has a crush on the new girl in town. Y/N is also a new member of the cheer squad, which means Robin sees her all the time at games and other school events. Unfortunately, Robin is put in a tough situation. She's scared to talk to her because the cheerleaders have a reputation of being mean girls and she fears that Y/N may not feel the same. Little does Robin know that Y/N does not appear as she seems. Y/N becomes best friends with Eddie, which seems unlikely at the surface due to different social circles. This leads to rumors of course and word spreads like wildfire here at Hawkins, which then makes Robin's feelings even more confusing. After hanging out with Steve and the gang, Robin starts to see a different side to Y/N. Will they end up together or will they just remain friends?
Word Count: 3.7k
Pinterest board for inspiration
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5
Chapter 6
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You heard the ding of the bell as someone had entered the book store. “Hey there, welcome to- oh hey you!” You say looking up to the customer but seeing Robin instead. Your mood had instantly lifted. It had been months since the Christmas party at Steve’s and things were going great between you and Robin. You guys were hanging out a lot more. You had things that turned into weekly traditions. Like going to the movies every Friday night, going to the diner every Sunday morning and getting breakfast, and now that it was getting warm out you went on walks after school everyday. You loved the time you got to spend with her. It just felt right between the two of you. You had missed her and were grateful to have her back. “What are you doing here?” You asked with a smile.
“Oh you know, just bringing you some lunch. I figured it might be a slow day so I thought I’d keep you some company.” Robin said, setting down some food to share between the two of you. 
“Well aren’t you just a peach!” You say walking from behind the counter and giving her a hug.
“You look so pretty today.” Robin complimented as she took your hand. You did a twirl while still holding her hand. You were wearing a white top with a black skirt, something simple but still so beautiful in Robin's.
You blushed at her compliment. “Thank you sweet angel!” You thanked her. 
The pair of you sat and ate the food that Robin had brought. You chatted about spring break plans as it was coming up in a few weeks. Steve of course wanted to throw a party since his parents would be gone and Eddie wanted to go on a road trip with everyone. But you and Robin just wanted to stay back and have a nice relaxing time. Sadly it was not an option as it was split in the middle and it was up to the two of you to decide what you all did. 
“I mean if we pick a party at Steve’s, maybe it won't be a big thing? You know, just make it like a few of us or something?” Robin suggested.
“Yeah that could work honestly. You don’t wanna be stuck in a van with Eddie, it can get super gross and smelly. He is a man after all! Plus all of us confined in such a tight space like that, we’d probably kill each other eventually.” You chuckled. The thought of that could make Robin spiral, she had avoided Eddie as much as she could. If she were around him, she’d just get angry and sad all over again just like that night at your house all those months ago. 
“So it’s settled then, we’ll have a small party at Steve’s. I’d better call him and let him know, can I use the phone here?” She asked, you handed her the phone and cleaned up the trash from lunch.
“Hey Harrington, we made a decision. We’ll have the party. BUT, only if it’s just our group. No big Harrington bash. I’m serious!” She said. Robin continued the phone call with Steve as you finished cleaning up. “Yeah yeah yeah, whatever dingus. Look I gotta go okay? Bye.” Robin said, hanging up the phone shortly after. People were starting to stagger in and look around, which meant Robin had to leave. “Alright well, I guess I should head out and let you go.”
“I’ll see you at school tomorrow angel!” You said waving goodbye to her and quickly started helping people find what they needed. You liked working at the bookstore, it was usually pretty calming most days. Plus when it was super dead, you were able to read some of the books yourself. You were currently hooked on reading The Lord of The Rings series and you had just finished The Hobbit not too long ago. You wished you could buy the full set, but it had cost way too much. 
“Did you find everything all right Mrs. Gibson?” You said as you were checking out one of your usual customers. Mrs. Gibson would come in every week to find new books for her young granddaughter. It was sweet and you enjoyed the conversations you would have with her. 
“Oh yes I did! How have you been my dear?” She asked.
“I’ve been great! Just been working, going to school, and hanging out with my friends. I hope you’re doing well!” You replied. 
“I’ve been doing good! Any fun plans for spring break?” She asked, pulling her wallet out of her purse. 
“Your total is $13.45 by the way! Me and a few friends are gonna have a small get together, but that's all that I have planned. How about you, do you have anything fun planned?” You say to her.
“Well Mr. Gibson and I are planning on heading to Florida with the family, we have a little beach house there and we go a few times a year!” Mrs. Gibson replied, handing you the cash. 
“That sounds lovely, I hope you and your family have a wonderful time!” You handed her the receipt and exchanged goodbyes.
The rest of your shift went by rather quickly, you soon headed home to get dinner and ready for bed as you had school in the morning.
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 You stood at your locker getting your books for the next few classes, when suddenly you see a pair of feet before you. You close your locker to see Robin standing there. “Are we still on for tonight?” She asked with a grin.
“Yes we are, but I do have to help Eddie study for exams after school. I will absolutely be there to pick you up at our usual time once I'm done!” You say as you walk with her to your next class, which you just so happened to have with her. 
“Seems a little early to be studying for exams doesn’t it?” Robin questioned.
“Well you know Eddie, he’s gotta start early if he wants to graduate with us.” You said. This was important to you which meant it was important to Eddie. He didn’t want to disappoint anyone, especially you. He cared too much about you to let you down. So if that meant he had to buckle up and study, then that's what he would do. 
“I guess that makes sense. As long as he doesn’t take you away from me for our movie night then we’ll be good, otherwise I’d probably have to beat him up.” You chuckled at her joke but Robin was only semi joking. You both took your seats as class was starting.
“Alright everyone, pop quiz time!” The teacher said which made the class groan.
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Robin sat on her front steps waiting for you to pick her up for the movies. She continuously kept checking her watch, she feared that you were gonna be late or not show up at all. She knew how you got when you would hang out with Eddie. As Robin got caught up with her anxious thoughts, she heard a honk. She had checked her watch for the time. There you were right on time as you said you would. Robin let out a sigh of relief, she hated thinking the worst at times. Especially when the thing she was so anxious about ended up working out and being fine in the end.
“You ready to go?” You asked as Robin got in the car. She nodded and buckled her seatbelt. “Alright then, let's go!” You said driving off to the theater. 
You make it there and stand in line to get your tickets. As you were deciding which film to see, you heard a voice behind you. “Oh well well well, look who it is, girls?” You and Robin turn around to see who it is, but deep down you know already.
“Hello Chrissy.” You say with an unpleasant sigh. “Can we help you with something?” Robin asked.
“Yeah you can actually, why don’t you both go crawl back into whatever hole-” Robin held up her hand to Chrissy.
“Would you just give it up already and go bother someone who actually gives a shit?” Robin stated. She was a little shocked with herself. She never stood up to people like Chrissy. 
“Ugh whatever! Let’s get out of here girls” Chrissy scoffed as her and her friends walked away. 
“Next please!” The ticket holder called. It was your turn in line. You bought your tickets and made your way inside to get snacks and catch your seats. You had decided on seeing Gremlins as Robin hadn’t seen it yet and she knew how much you enjoyed horror films. Plus it had a little bit of a Christmas feel to it, which you knew how much Robin loved Christmas.
The movie was going well and you were both enjoying it. Robin was so tranced at the screen that she almost jumped at you holding her hand, but that feeling had soon faded as you started to rub your thumb against her skin. It was a simple act of affection but it meant so much to Robin. It brought her so much comfort and reminded her of the first night that you ever held her hand. She got butterflies just thinking about it. 
“So did you enjoy the movie?” You asked as you drove Robin home. 
“I actually did!” Robin exclaimed, she was rambling on about the cinematography and anything else that she could having to do with the film. “I’m rambling again aren’t I? Oh god I’m sorry, when I get excited-” 
“It’s okay, I find it cute the way you ramble. Especially when you get excited about things.” You reassured her. You turned to her and moved a piece of hair out of her face gently. “There, now I can see all of your pretty face!” You say with a giggle. Robin just sat there with her mouth open, all she could do was sit there and turn a light shade of pink. 
“I um-” She coughed trying to clear her throat. “Thank you.” Robin said, looking straight ahead. For the rest of the ride home you talked about what you both would do before the party at Steve’s. You had decided on going to the park and reading a book with her and going to the music store to check out the new records that were in stock. You were both excited to spend more time together, just the two of you doing things that you both enjoyed.
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“Roads go ever ever on, Over rock and under tree, By caves where never sun has shone, By streams that never find the sea; Over snow by winter sown, And through the merry flowers of June, Over grass and over stone, And under mountains in the moon. Roads go ever ever on, Under cloud and under star. Yet feet that wandering have gone Turn at last to home afar. Eyes that fire and sword have seen, And horror in the halls of stone Look at last on meadows green, And trees and hills they long have known”
You read aloud as you lay your head in Robin’s lap. You were both lying in the field at the park as the sun was setting. You were finishing up reading The Hobbit to Robin as she hadn’t read it before. Eddie let you borrow his copy. As you were reading, Robin played with your hair with one hand, while you held the other. It was a perfect moment and neither of you wanted it to end. Once you had finished the book, the pair of you just stayed where you were. Enjoying the company of one another until the sun had fully set. Robin helped you clean up once it was time to go. 
“So do you know who’s gonna be at this party tomorrow?” Robin asked. She wanted to make sure Eddie wouldn’t be there to ruin her moment. She was finally going to take Steve’s advice and ask you out. She felt that things were going well with the two of you and you had been spending more time with her than with Eddie. 
“I’m honestly not sure, I know it’ll be us, Nancy and Mike, maybe Dustin, Lucas, and Max as well.” Robin let out a sigh of relief. Surely you would know if Eddie were coming and if you did then you would have told her. The both of you continued to talk more about the party as you drove Robin home. 
“So I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 8 and then we can stay at my place after the party!” You say as Robin stands outside the driver side door. 
“That sounds perfect to me, I’ll see you then! Drive safe!” Robin replied as she made her way to the front door. 
“Don’t I always?” You chuckled and drove off. 
Tomorrow was going to be a big day and Robin just hoped it would go the way she had planned it all week.
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It was finally the big night of the party and Robin was a nervous wreck. She tried to hide that from you but you knew her too well. “You okay there?” You asked. 
“What oh uh yeah, yeah I’m okay.” Robin replied, fidgeting with her fingers. You grab her hand and rub your thumb like you normally do. You could tell something was eating at her, but you never pushed her to tell you anything she didn’t want to talk about. 
“Well whatever has you all anxious, just know I’m here for you, however you need me, okay angel?” You say still rubbing your thumb on her smooth skin. She nods her head and thanks you. 
You both arrive at the party and already there’s a good amount of people there. You make your rounds to say hello to everyone and suddenly the doorbell rings. 
“What’s up, party people?!” Eddie shouts over the music as he and a few of the other members of the Hellfire gang walk in, setting the pizza and soda down on the table. 
“Oh my god Eddie!” You yell in excitement as you jump into his arms. You hadn’t seen him for a while and you missed him like crazy. “I missed you so so much Eds!”
He spun around with you in his arms. “I missed you too peach!” Eddie exclaimed. 
Robin went into the kitchen to hide away, she was angry. She felt like her entire plan was ruined. Steve came into the kitchen to see what was wrong.
“Hey, what the hell is going on?” Steve asked as Robin was hunched over the counter.
“Why is he here?!” She asked, anger seeping in her voice.
“Well when I was inviting Dustin, Eddie may have overheard so I had to invite him too. I felt bad, I didn't want to leave him out.” Steve responded and gave his friend a sympathetic look. “Robin, I’m really sorry. I should have told you that he was coming. Y/N didn’t know, don’t be mad at her.” 
She let out a harsh sigh. “Whatever.” She said brushing past Steve and going back to the party. 
Everyone was watching a movie in the living room so Robin sat in the recliner and watched along to try and get her out of this sour mood. She was determined to get her moment with you, no matter what it takes. She wanted it to be perfect.
There you were sitting on the sofa with Eddie, your legs on his lap as he held onto you. She couldn’t take it anymore. She stormed out of the room and went outside and sat by the pool. You soon followed after her to see if she was okay. 
“Robin? Hey, what's the matter?” You say sitting next to her.
“Why does HE have to be here?” Robin scoffed.
“Who?” You asked.
“Eddie, that's who!” She yells.
You had never seen Robin this upset before. You tried to comfort her the best you could. ‘Had something happened between them? Why was she so mad at Eddie?’ So many thoughts were racing through your mind you didn’t know what to think.
“Did something happen with you guys?” You questioned Robin.
“Yes- well no. Not exactly.” She began to quiet down and look away from you, trying to hide the tears that were forming. You could hear her voice breaking as she spoke.
“Hey, angel. Talk to me, what’s going on?” You said trying to get her to look at you.
“It’s just- it’s not fair.” Robin began to say.
“What’s not fair?” You asked.
“That HE gets to be with you. That he gets to make you laugh the way that you do, that he gets to do the things that I should be able to do with you. It’s just so goddamn unfair!” She sobbed. 
“Robin-” She interrupted you before you could continue.
“That’s why I didn’t talk to you for that period of time, I couldn’t stand seeing you together the way that you are. I’ve been through this with Vickie. It broke me so badly and I never wanted to face that kind of rejection or humiliation ever again and now it’s happening all a second time. I had this big plan to ask you to be my girlfriend and to go to the prom with me. I love spending time with you. I love the way you twirl around in your skirts. I love the way you scrunch your nose like a bunny. I love the way that when the wind hits just right, I can smell your perfume and how sweet it is. I love the way that your eyes sparkle in the moonlight. I love the way that I feel when I’m with you. I love you. I love you so damn much. But I can’t bear to see you with Eddie anymore. I just-” You pulled her face towards yours and kissed her. She didn’t know what to think, she hadn’t done this with anyone before. It didn’t take long for her instincts to kick in. Robin began to kiss you back. Your lips began to move in sync with hers, like it was meant to be. You tasted sweet, like strawberries. She knew how she felt about you and she knew this just felt right. 
“Robin, Eddie and I are just friends. I promise you that. He’s my best friend and that’s it. Eddie is my Steve.” You began to say. “He was the first friend I ever really made. I never had any growing up, I got picked on a lot. He understood me in ways that no one ever had. We both lost our mom’s and our dad's aren't the greatest.” 
‘That would explain why she lived with her grandparents.’ Robin thought to herself. You began to wipe away her tears gently. 
“Robin, I’ve had feelings for you for so long. I tried to give as many signals as I could, I just thought that you maybe didn’t feel the same. You are so special to me and I care about you so much. You mean everything to me. I love the way you ramble when you get nervous and even about the things that you're passionate about. I love that little hair that hangs in your face. I love that I can be myself when I'm with you. I love how funny you are, I just love you Robin.” You admitted to her. 
“Really?” She asked.
“Yes really!” You giggled.
“So does this mean-” Robin started.
“Yes, I will be your girlfriend!” You said and you kissed her cheek. 
“Cool, that’s- that’s super cool.” She said getting flustered. You giggled at her and stood up from where you sat. 
“Come on, let’s go back inside and have a good time.” You suggested, holding out your hand to help her up. She took your hand and got up, following you back inside. The group ended up having fun the rest of the night, watching movies, eating junk food, and playing games. It was around midnight when everyone started to head home.
“Hey Munson, wait up!” Robin called to Eddie as he headed toward his van.
“What’s up?” He asked, turning around to face her.
“Look, I’m really sorry for the way I’ve treated you as of late. You’re a good guy and I was just-” She let out a sigh. “Just jealous of you and I thought that you were with Y/N, so I acted horribly to you and that wasn’t fair. I’m really sorry Eddie.”
He chuckled. “It’s alright Robin, really. You didn’t know and I don’t blame you for that. I appreciate the apology. Just hope that we can be friends now.”
“Definitely!” Robin proclaimed. 
The two said their goodbyes and Robin made her way back to your car. You drove off back to your house, holding onto her hand. She began to think to herself about how Steve was right all along once again. “Damn you Harrington.” She muttered to herself.
“What was that?” You asked, looking over to her.
“Oh nothing, it was nothing.” Robin replied with a huge smile on her face.
Next chapter
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b0n3s-is-gay · 1 year
Text
Random Cannon! Levi brainrot
SFW:
Levi seems like a boobs person rather than an ass guy. Sure he'll slap your ass once in a while but nothing will change the feeling of coming home from an expedition, laying down on top of you, and nuzzling into your chest.
Levi never thought he'd have time for love with all his paper work and work, but once he met you... All that changed. He fell head over heels in love but didn't want to hurt you if he didn't come back one day.
I belive that Levi has only learned enough english/ japanese to do his paper work. So, if you want to take up the work of teaching him how to spell, what words mean, how to use words, ect. then that becomes your go to at home date.
Levi doesn't drink but when he does, that tiny man goes the fuck down. He stumbles, giggles, curses, and cries. He's an all over the place kinda drunk. So when Hange does convince him to drink, you bet your sweet ass you'll be carrying the dwarf home.
Levi gets really tense after missions, so he loves to come home and run a nice, hot bath for the both of you. He'll cuddle as you sit on top of him. He'll love it if you wash his hair and masage his scalp.
Levi works non-stop. He won't stop unless you make him or Erwin orders him to stop. So, you better belive that you'll have to come check up on him and make sure that he eats. If he's asleep at his desk, please carry him to his bed and cuddle him till he wakes up the next morning or when the nightmares wake him up.
Read to him, he loves to hear your voice. He finds it to be soothing and relaxing, and we all know how much he needs to relax. So read to him, whether its a book that you like or just some paper work.
Cuddles, cuddles, CUDDLES!!!! This man thrives off attention behind closed doors. Kiss him, hold him, Love on him till his knees get weak. He needs some positive attention from his darling! :D
NSFW:
Once when you and Levi were just getting physical, he heard from Hange that sex in hot water means easy clean up, staying clean, and extra warmth. He really wanted to try it, so once during your bath time cuddles he brought the Idea up. You wanting to be the best partner ever said yes. It felt really good, so it happends more often.
Levi being the small man that he is, isn't as big as one might thing. People think all his height went down there, but it didn't. It never existed, for all his points of height went to his smarts and combat. I think he's around 5-6 inches long and a little bit girthy.
Levi cannot and I mean CANNOT do knife or gun play, poor baby gets flashbacks of times where he was almost stabbed or shot while trying to survive in the Underground City. :(
Cockwarming is a must, whether it be while he's reading or while he's doing work. Levi loves the feeling of you being close to him, it makes him feel like you're always going to be there for him. I like to think it has something to do with abandonment issues. (Kuchel, Kenny, Isabel, Farlan, Erwin, ect.)
Levi loves the thought of having you take care of him, he needs to feel like someone is there for him. He never says anything about it though, so if you wanna take care of him... You'll have to ask or bring it up first. He won't say no.
Levi is not a fan of degrading, he's been degraded enough you know... Kenny and everyone else. On the other side of the same coin, Levi wants you to praise him. Call him a good boy and he will melt, tell him "good job" and he'll work faster and harder, praise him as much as you want or can. He eats that shit up.
Please... PLEASE... help him please himself. He gets so focused on work to the point where he's frustrated and horny. So please go down on him while he's working or after he's done. Poor baby just needs a break :(
Levi is not a risk taker, not at all. Having sex is supposed to be a loving moment, that's what this his mama taught him. plus, having sex in open spaces makes him feel dirty. The most risk you'll get is a bj under the desk.
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eggo-da-axolotl · 2 months
Text
chapter 1 of Opposites attract <3
Thursday morning a certain blue meme guardian woke up feeling.... Happy ? No that wasn't it and he brushed it off and started cleaning the castle because his friends and smg3 were coming over! He checked the calendar and it was the 23rd of May so he started to clean and what not and his phone started to beep and he opened the group chat with his friends!
*****************************
DA COOL GROUP
=============
Fish🐟: My cousin’s doing a back bend while watching little bus
Squid🦑: Good for you boopkins
Gamer girl🎮: What
Maryo🍝: GUS I CEE DAT PIZLE GIY
Ex-enemy🟣: Guys what is Mario talking about-
Everyone: idk-
*****************************
Smg4 chuckled a bit then put his phone down and continued cleaning and after a bit he heard a knock at the door. He opened it and saw.... Smg3....?
3: hey Smg4..?
4: hey 3 your um here early?
3: wdym I thought u said 3:30-
4: it's 2:30-
3: what. Oh crap my clocks one hour behind I'll just go-
4: no it's OK you can stay
3: really-
4: yea u can help me set up
3: sure!
4: your so tsundere smg3
3: s-shut up baka!
Smg3 and Smg4 were cleaning while a certain.. TV host.. Was in his studio...
Mr puzzles: UGH I GIVE UP ON THESE 5 STARS
He would throw papers against the wall in rage
Mr puzzles: I think it's time I get a job...
He would go on his computer and look for places hiring.... That won't be important
Right..?
Anyways let's go back to the ga- I means guys
3: crap I forgot my gift for the white elephant
4: go get it I'll finish cleaning and the others should be here soon
3 would leave and the others would starts arriving...
Boopkins: hiya smg4!
Meggy: Hey guys
Tari: hello!
Melony: hi!!!
Bob: WhAtS uP gAnG
Mario: HEY ES M GEE 4
Saiko: こんにちは(hello)
4: hello everyone! Meggy: um smg4 isnt someone missing
4: oh yea smg3 said he'd be here any minu-
Smg3 would arrive
3: h-hey guys
he'd be out of breath from running
Everyone would say hi
4: come on giys lets go to the gamimg room and we can start the white elephant!
They would all go to the gaming room and there would be 9 gifts in the middle of the circle
4: ok guys pick a number from the hat and thats the order your going in
They woukd all pick numbers from the hat and the order would be
1 mario
2 meggy
3 bob
4 boopkins
5 melony
6 smg4
7 saiko
8 tari
9 smg3
4: let's start!
Mario would open a gift and there would be spaghetti..?
Mario: OMG I GOT A RESERVATION AT SPAGHETTI PLACE!!!
Meggy: um mario its says an italian restaurant but ig they have spaghetti there-
meggy would go next and get a beanie
Meggy: aww this is so cuteee
After a while bob would get a manga book which he was mad about boopkims ofc took the book from bob then bob got another gift and got a gun, melony would got a pokemon plush and then it would be smg4s turn amd he would get a... Mysterious pink potion..?
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4: what is this-
Boopkins: i took some potion making classes!
4: what does it do..?
Boopkins: idk
4: Uh- anyways lets continue anyways Saiko its your turn!
Saiko: ああ、かわいい桜のピン(aww cute cherry blossom pin)
Tari would get a duck and smg3 would take the last one and would get a hoodie.
After a few hours everyone except Smg3 had left...
3: i bet u 20 bucks u wont drink the potion
4: wanna bet
3: bet.
Smg4 would grab the potion and start chugging it and would be empty in a few seconds.
Unknown to smg3.... smg4s eyes would have a hue of........ Pink?
3: dang i didn't think you would actually do it-
Smg3 would be getting his money out when smg4 would stop him.....
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