#and i straight up started shaking
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yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit · 10 months ago
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Both my parents actually suffer from HORRID emotional dysregulation and are prone to snapping and going into rages. My sister is the same way tbh. I am now realizing this is why they are constantly baffled by the question of whether or not I am mad at them.
I don't have external meltdowns.
I could. I don't let it happen.
I keep my rage on the inside and stay pretty quiet about it. It's just as strong as theirs [physically shaking nose bleed from high blood pressure kind of bad], but like as a kid I saw how terrifying it was to be around [dad breaking dishes, mom putting our lawn chairs into walls] and I just internalized that I wasn't going to wear that anger on the outside.
So my mother genuinely cannot tell if I am just being quiet or if I am silently hearing the dial-up noises of pure rage. This has lead her to both making strong and confident statements like "You are a pacifist who would never hurt a fly U.U" but also acting like I am secretly dangerous maybe... It's because she has never seen me snap.
She knows what her temper is like [throwing chairs through walls], she knows what my father's temper is like [pick up child and toss out door], and she can tell I am being tested, but she doesn't know what happens when I snap or where that breaking point is.
Her -perhaps unhinged- solution to this, my whole life, has been to do things that should obviously enrage me or shut me down completely, like ignoring important boundaries, repeatedly, punishing me for expressing emotions or needs at all, etc... And then to constantly ask me if I am angry with her when I get too quiet [right after near directly telling me to shut up].
It has occurred to me now, they have never once seen me lose my temper, so they literally just can't tell if I am angry at them. My sister is easy, my mother fights and screams with my sister constantly, my mother understands this. My mother doesn't have any grasp of feelings or boundaries that are not screamed at her [apparently, and I fear my sister is the same way]. Her and my sister are close despite constant fucking fighting because they understand each other.
They are trying to get me to engage the same way and it is not working. I realize now that this has been hard for them.
I was so successfully taught to suppress my emotions, by being punished for any outburst, that rage quiet looks the same as any other kind of quiet from the outside. To them anyway.
I did tell her. For the record. I used my words. I did tell her very calmly that my response to rage, in order to avoid doing the things that terrified me as a child, was to simply leave [the autistic urge to GTFO]. When a situation or person causes too much of the dial-up rage noise, I simply extract myself from that situation, up to and including never speaking to a person again. I explained this calmly. I explained it calmly 100 times and I explained that I explain myself calmly as my rage response 1-5 [also pretty much every other negative emotion tbh], and I told her that what came next was me simply opting out and fucking off. I told her this. I couldn't understand why she never took me seriously, or why she never fucking understood.
I couldn't understand what made her like this.
But it's the same problem I have with everyone else multiplied by a factor of 10.
If I am explaining myself calmly, they can't understand that it's actually serious or that I am actually upset. ESPECIALLY because they read me as "female" and women "aren't that rational" so if I am not screaming and crying about something, which I never do, people assume I can't be upset and it isn't serious.
And then after having my boundaries ignored too many times despite having calmly explained how and why it's a problem [shaking inside or not]... I leave. I leave and everyone gets upset like this is unexpected behaviour, even though I told them 50 times that is how I would respond if they kept doing *the thing.*
And for neurotypical people especially, they are expecting there to be a disconnect between what someone says they need or feel and what their actually boundaries and feelings are, and they expect the latter to be demonstrated with emotions. Telling them bluntly you do not function that way somehow never helps?
My mother isn't just looking for normal yelling or a few tears to know I am serious, whether or not I do those either [I don't], she's looking for an explosion to know there's a problem at all.
Fucked if I know how she proceeds through life this way in general or if this is just her expectation of her own kids???
And I couldn't get why my mother couldn't read my emotions and didn't seem to think I have any. It's because she's testing for the rage limit to see where my 'actual' limit is instead of taking my word for it. Never the fuck mind that she could simply *not* test at my boundaries instead of letting me have them. Separate issue.
I couldn't figure out what made her *like this*
She's expecting me to throw a giant meltdown violent tantrum at people when I have 'actually' had enough. Maybe she got away with those being like 5'4" in another time, but I am the size of the average man, I do not get to have giant screaming rages, whether or not people perceive me consciously as a woman, and least of all because a lot of people -at least unconsciously- read me as 'masculine' or at least always "they guy" of the situation compared to all other women and some men [bigger stronger and more rational, more able to just absorb the damage and let it go so the less rational screaming/crying one doesn't have to be dealt with]. Even if it was in me to be willing to terrify people [usually never], there are such limited instances where it wouldn't just blow back on me. Potentially very dangerously.
I am going to be the quiet calm one. You are going to have to let me use my words, bitch.
So she kept ignoring my boundaries until I had to cut her out of my life, and she probably doesn't understand and probably thinks it feels sudden -after 36 long years of bullshit- abrupt and unfair.
But I told her hundreds of times.
I probably should have just screamed at her.
#good stay out of our yard' and he didn't seem to know what to say to that#but other than that I don't think anyone in my adult life has ever seen me turn aggressive at all to the point where people 100% like to#play games of testing my patience and my boundaries because they think my tolerance is infinite#but like I have autistic rage tantrums on both sides of my family and they are just happening inside my head#And somehow it took me until now to realize that being that way was actually -expected- of me by my parents and especially my mother#and that by keeping myself outwardly level headed to be considerate I actually took away whatever signals she can understand#to have empathy for how I must be feeling#I mean it's still all on her#but it makes so much sense of why she's fucking *like this*#And why my sister thinks I hate her just because -she- stopped texting -me-#but that fucking guy#Every time I was like#In my adult life I have screamed at someone ONE whole time and it was 1000% deserved#And I threw heavy objects around one whole other time and in my defense I didn't do it in front of the guy he just felt the ground shaking#heard the thuds and came back to the logs blocking his path because that fucker wouldn't stop parking in our yard after being asked#and then TOLD not to about 10 times because he was acting entitled to just park in our yard and was crushing my plants???#seriously I don't know what his deal was but he wouldn't stop telling me how much the ground shaking scared him like it was supposed#to get my pity like I think this guy took one look at the logs I had just tossed down and was suddenly afraid of this “woman” he was#bullying in their own yard and so my ability to feel bad for scaring him had gone straight out the fucking window#I looked at him and said stop parking in our yard instead of your own you are killing my plants#he'd just fucking be like 'well the last people to live here let us D: :)“ and I'd be like ”good for them?“ ”stop“#and he'd just keep doing it#I was having a week of insomnia and was finally having the best dream#the kind of sex dream you have like twice in your life#and this fucker had just gotten some noisy ass little bike with a spoiler on it#and starts it up right under my window at 3am from IN OUR FUCKING YARD#so I had a nice long anger nap and just after he got home from work and was sleeping in his house#I picked up these chunks of deadwood tree from the back#there was like 3-4 logs that used to be a WHOLEASS fucking oak tree Like these logs were not as heavy as they -looked- but they were still#this fucker deleted half the tags I wrote and I am not retyping that fuck you tumblr so fucking hard
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theinfinitedivides · 2 months ago
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7HIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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anotherpapercut · 3 months ago
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was at a gas station in the middle of nowhere fucking Arkansas today and 2 old men stared at me so openly and intensely (I am very very visibly queer) that it actually terrified me and I had a panic attack and started shaking and crying in front of my coworkers and several teenagers 😐
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sjweminem · 7 months ago
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so immediately after that evil wretched walmart commercial came on tv our toilet stopped working everything wants to harm me
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incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 2 years ago
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Comte Election Story, 6th Anniversary Event (JPN 2023)
I managed to get Comte's collection story during the 6th year anniversary event in the JPN version of the game. As usual, my translation skills are rudimentary at best, so this is just a rough/general sense of the contents. Rest of the translation is below the cut:
Sweet and lovely, our everyday life is irreplaceable. After becoming a vampire, I’ve lived with him forever like this. I seek out more and more of the man I love than anyone else--
Comte: Good morning, MC. You’re up very early today.
I went down to the dining room a few hours before dawn--only to find Comte nursing a teacup gracefully at one end of the table.
MC: Good morning. I managed to wake up somehow…how about you?
Comte: Actually, I just got back.
When I asked, he told me that the host of the party started talking to him all night, and they didn’t part ways until after midnight.
Comte: I was going to finish this cup of tea to unwind, and then try to rest til noon.
He runs a hand through his freshly washed hair and brings the cup to his mouth in a series of elegant gestures that makes me fall in love with him all over again. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve been up all night, but my heart readily starts beating faster.
Even Comte seems to notice my reaction…
Comte: …looking at me like that, are you seducing me?
Comte's eyes narrowed mischievously and he left his cup behind to approach me. A beautiful beast gazed at me as if to take aim at his prey, and he drew me in with supple hands.
MC: I didn’t intend it that way but…it’s true that I'm captivated. Your damp hair and lovely gestures are so sexy that I’m at a loss…
Comte: Saying such a thing…you’re a naughty woman, MC. Even though I tried to quell my ardor with a cold shower and hot tea...I’m glad to hear it, even though I’m far from calm.
When I raised my head--having looked down in bashful embarrassment--I can see burgeoning in Comte’s eyes an indisputable, feverish desire…
MC: Ah, mm…
His soft lips playfully brushed against the nape of my neck.
Comte: No one else would be awake at this hour…though we could be interrupted any moment. Make sure to keep your voice down.
He chuckled a little before a hot sigh caressed my skin, dropping kisses one after another. He circled around the usual place he’d sink his fangs into me, and every brush of his lips made heat gather low in my body…
MC: So impatient…Abel…
Comte: …I’ve been waiting for you to give it to me
The corners of his lips lifted a little, before he buried his fangs into my neck.
MC: Mn, ah…aaaahh…
Comte: I love you so much...and whenever we aren't together, I’m starved of you. We were miles apart all night yesterday. I’ll show you just how much I missed you.
His voice--half-intoxicated with the ecstasy of my blood--was sweet and husky with his desire.
Comte: Before you, I’m always a love-starved beast.
As I gaze into those eyes burning with emotion, an electric sensation tingles down my spine. 
(Ah, I’m just the same. It’s not only my heart, my body is always seeking you out too.)
MC: Me too…all day and night, I’m always thinking about you…
Comte: --Come here. Take as much of me as you want
At his encouragement and incitement, I sink my fangs into him.
MC: ah, ha…
Pleasure washes over me in an endless cascade, every sensation in my body heightened and sharp. I clenched my hands tighter through his wet hair, and dug my fangs into him greedily to devour that wellspring of ecstasy. 
Comte: I'm happy to be able to share love with you like this, as a vampire.
Like drops of water moistening desiccated earth, every crimson drop fills us to the brim--
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp saint germain#ikevamp comte#ikevamp mc#comte propaganda#if you can't already tell from the contents of this one--i straight up died after reading it#THE IMPLICATIONS. FOAMING AT THE MOUTH.#the way they're both dancing around it. MC trying to be strong and endure properly (girl same) and. comte.#THE WAY COMTE BASICALLY STARTS SHAKING HIS ASS LIKE ONE OF THOSE BIRDS OF PARADISE. I AM UNWELL (AND ECSTATIC).#THE WAY HE WANTS HER TO WANT HIM AS INTENSELY/DESPERATELY AS HE DOES HER. THE WAY HE RELISHES HER BITING HIM HARD.#IM NEVER GONNA RECOVER FROM THIS ONE#ive legit just been that ace attorney meme with phoenix holding his head in his hands for DAYS#dare i even mention 'make sure to keep your voice down.' SIR. SIR ARE YOU SRS RN#man the way in purple moon event he was like 'oh nooooo haha no hank pank in public where we might get caught that's too inappropriate~ owo#I SEE YOU ABEL. I SEE YOU MONSIEUR LE COMTE DE SAINT GERMAIN.#I SEE THAT U SIT UPON A THRONE OF L I E S#i hope whoever writes comte as unhinged as possible over at jpn cybird gets a god damn raise#i have never in my life been so directly catered to in one chara i swear#'loved-starved beast' ILL DO YOU ONE BETTER COMTE JUST LET ME IN. LET ME IIIIIIIIN!!!!!!#straight up ive said it before and ill say it again#that's my emotional support softcore yan meow meow golden retriever#every event im like 'hope this doesn't awaken anything inside me.' and then immediately its just 'failed step one.'#although all jokes aside i do find it endlessly fascinating about the purebloods how like#while they don't experience as much bloodlust there is this acute sense of biting as a vital expression of romantic interest and/or claim#i dont think its a throwaway line that comte says at the end--id actually argue a lot of his desire for intimacy when she's human (cont.)->#is because he feels a level of insecurity in his connection to her caused by the lack of shared/reciprocated biting#you know now that has me wondering if that's part of why other purebloods frown so heavily upon the idea of a pureblood/human couple#basically because they can't fulfill the most basic tenet of what it means to be coupled in that community's perception#yeesh ikevamp really went 'welcome to normative vampire politics' and im like 'I Am So Normal About This. (lie + analyzes)'
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fnvbennygecko · 2 months ago
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you know what's Also crazy. ibuprofen no longer works on me. greaaaat. not concerning at all. like oh my god my legs were aching so badly last night and im sure even if i took ibuprofen it literally wouldnt have worked i wont lie. i dont even bother with taking ibuprofen or anything like that im just like yay. suffering.
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somedaytakethetime · 4 months ago
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You win some..
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.. you lose some..
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cygnusposts · 5 months ago
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one of my all-time favorite parts of under the red hood is probably actually jensen's voice acting. specifically in the little bit where he and bruce are finally meeting face to face in crime alley and you can just. hear the little shake in his voice. idk
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slipperyslideyday · 10 months ago
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I'm really realizing that my biggest ick in books is when man / woman / any gendered term is replaced with "male" and "female". Typically I see it used in romances with non human characters but like. Are you really dedicating yourself to "yes these angels/vampires/fairies/were-whatevers have a sexual binary that humans TOTALLY have but dont call them man or woman! bc they're not human!"
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frenchfrywrites · 2 years ago
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Bilbo, Sam, and Legolas were THE perfect babygirls
I for one am devastated you didn't include faramir in this list... is he not the babiest girl in all of Gondor?!!
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luvcaleb · 5 months ago
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YOU'RE MINE.
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nsfw (18+). includes aphrodisiacs, dry humping, rubbing cock over panties, possessive!caleb, caleb is gentle at first until you piss him off, this is basically ‘testing caleb's patience: the fic’, unprotected sex, creampie, i have to mention that caleb is possessive twice because caleb says some freaky stuff, sappy confession during sex, happy (horny) ending <3 likes and reblogs will be very helpful !!
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Caleb doesn't accept love letters and chocolates whenever Valentine's Day comes along. However, girls directly stuff them into his bag without his knowledge sometimes, and you take it upon yourself to eat the sweets because Caleb would just throw it straight to the trash otherwise.
“It's a waste,” you'd always say. “You might not like them back, but they still made the effort to make chocolate for you.”
And then Caleb would shake his head, frowning, “Though most of them mean well, sometimes they put weird stuff in the food. So if I were you, I'd spit out that cupcake, pipsqueak.”
You usually don't heed his warnings—Caleb's always been kind of an overthinker. Now, though, you regret not listening to him as an unfamiliar heat spreads across your body, your core throbbing as you feel yourself dripping in your panties.
...The panties that's rubbing against Caleb's crotch right now, soaking the fabric of his pants while you grind down on him. Caleb's expression looks like a mix of confusion, worry, and arousal, his hands hovering above your waist as if unsure where to touch you. “Nn— hey, what's gotten into you? Do you even know what you're doing right now?”
You see his Adam's apple bob up and down as he nervously swallows, and you start feeling something poking you at your clothed core. Caleb sits up on the sofa where you pushed him down a while ago, grabbing your hands on his shoulders. “C'mon, tell me. I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong.”
You whimper, your body collapsing on top of his. He quickly scoops you up, one hand holding the back of your head, the other resting on your lower back, ensuring you're properly seated on his thighs.
“I... I feel weird,” you pant, clutching the front of his shirt. “I'm dizzy, and my body is hot all over. My...” you swallow down your embarrassment, “my pussy feels empty... Caleb, can't you help me? Please?”
Almost imperceptibly, his grip on you tightens by a fraction. He sighs, angling your head to make you look at him in the eye. Perhaps it's the trick of the light, but Caleb's face is a flustered pink. “I can't do that. You're going to regret it when you turn back to normal and get all weird about it.” He glances at the chocolates you ate on the table, brows furrowed. “Aphrodisiac chocolate... I should've known. Then you wouldn't have become like this...”
Your mind is in a daze. Your body feels unusually heavy, but your head feels like it's floating. Most of what he said is lost on you, and at this moment, the only thing you can focus on is that Caleb is looking at something else. You grab both of his cheeks, forcibly turning his attention to you. “Please help me, Caleb...” Clumsily, you lift up your hips, pressing your cunt against the tent in his pants. It glistens with your wetness, and Caleb can't help but groan when you rub the tip with your thumb. “It hurts... I need this inside me...”
Caleb has always adhered to your whims, but even he has his limits. He pinches your cheek, “I can't put it inside, idiot, I don't have a condom. I just have to make you cum, right?” He gestures for you to pick up the hem of your skirt, sucking in a breath when he sees how soaked you are. “Fuck....”
The entire crotch area is damp, and if he looks carefully, he can even see the faint shape of your clit. Curiously, he draws circles on it, breathing heavily when a fresh glob of slick stains your underwear. “That's hot...”
He pulls down his zipper, releasing his cock from his boxers. You gasp softly at the sight. He's long and thick, arching to a beautiful curve, colored almost red from the strain of holding back. He gives himself a few experimental pumps, moans coming from his mouth as he masturbates at the sight of you, holding up your own skirt to give him a perfect view of your wet panties, an innocent, frilly pair he can't wait to ruin.
He positions his cock to your folds, aiming at the spot your hole should be if not covered by your underwear. You both groan at the first slide, his pre-cum further soaking the fabric of your ruined panties. He wraps himself in his fist, teasing your clit as he pumps into his hand. More pearls of white spurt out of his tip. “Ah, fuck, that's good... so good...”
“Ah, ah, Caleb!”
You move your hips, moaning while he rubs himself against your cunt. The warmth of his cock is driving you crazy, and the added friction of Caleb rubbing your nipple through your clothes makes you even wetter than you already are. He's biting his lip, dazed eyes staring at your body appreciatively. “I'm taking this off, baby.”
He impatiently runs his hand through the buttons of your clothes, some of them popping off to clatter on the floor. “H-hey, I liked this shirt— haa...!”
“I'll buy you a new one,” he grunts, mouthing at one of your tits, sucking as if anything would come out. He unclasps your bra one-handed, throwing it over your shoulder. “These things are fucking annoying...”
Finally, he gets tired of rubbing you over your clothes. He lifts the side of your panties, sliding his cock inside to directly grind against your pussy. “Shit, that's more like it,” he moans loudly, your wetness gliding down his balls. “You feel so good.”
“Caleb, put it inside already,” you whine, scrunching up the fabric of your skirt in your fists. “This isn't enough for you either, hnn, right...? Give me your cock, please...”
Caleb grits his teeth, holding your hips to stop you from dropping on his dick. “Didn't I tell you I don't have a condom?”
“I don't care!” you struggle in his hold. “Fuck me, c'mon... it hurts...! If you don't...”
You pant against his ear, knowing exactly what you're getting into, drugged or not, “...I'll ask Zayne to fuck me instead.”
The effect is instantaneous. He pulls out, replacing his cock with two fingers plunging inside you at once, hitting deep all the way inside. You choke, gasping out for breath as his hand doesn't stop, slick jetting out of your cunt with every push of his fingers. His clothes are getting soaked, but Caleb doesn't care about them at all, coldly glaring at your face twisted in pleasure.
“So you're telling me you'd be fine with just anyone?” He's chuckling, but he doesn't sound like he's happy. “Fuck. I should've just done this from the start, then.”
He grabs two of the chocolates, popping one in his mouth. When he finishes swallowing, he places the other one in his mouth again, but then he suddenly grabs your jaw. “Open your mouth, slut.”
He pulls you in for a kiss, mouths locking together. The chocolate melts from the heat, his tongue licking at yours as he's forcing you to swallow. He doesn't let you go until he's sure you've eaten all of it, drool dripping from the corner of your lips.
“We're not stopping until you learn I'm the only one who gets to see you like this,” he grunts, taking out his fingers and slathering your slick on his cock to make it wet. “I'm the only one who gets to call you mine.”
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“Haa... haa...”
Clothes are strewn messily on Caleb's bedroom floor, the mattress squeaking with each thrust of his hips. You're on your back, one leg hooked over Caleb's shoulder, staring into space as you're fucked absolutely stupid.
“Fuck, I can't stop my hips....” Caleb's still fucking into you, hasn't stopped for the past hour. The effects of the aphrodisiac have probably passed after the first two rounds, but his cock shows no signs of softening after release. He cums another load into you, overflowing from your pussy to spread into his sheets. “Ah, hng, shit... Hey, I told you not to waste it.”
He pulls out, pressing his fingers inside your loose hole to fuck his cum back in. You make a sound of protest, already feeling full.
“Are you starting to regret what you said now?” He grabs the back of your thighs, pressing your legs next to your ears. “Too late for that, though.”
Caleb groans, sloshing his cum inside your cunt with his dick. You helplessly grab at the sheets, moaning brokenly. His pelvis rubs against your engorged clit on every snap of his hips, driving you to squirt on his abs again, his torso glistening with your mess.
“You're squirting again? How many times have you cum?” Caleb laughs meanly, sucking another possessive mark among the smattering of hickeys he's already left along your collarbones. “Nasty girl...”
He leans back, getting a better view of your body. There are traces of him everywhere, from the hickeys on your neck, his cum on your chest because you couldn't swallow everything he poured in your mouth, and the faint bite marks on your inner thighs when he paid the favor and ate you out.
He presses a kiss on your chest, staring at you with dark eyes. “If you didn't say that, I would've been patient with you. Fingered you loose before putting my cock inside, making sure you're comfortable... I would've helped you ride out the effects of the aphrodisiac and never speak of it again. After all, to you, I'm just family.” He nuzzles against your cheek, his voice taking on a darker tone. “But you just had to call out another guy's name, didn't you... Would've fucked him if it was him here, not me...”
Caleb thrusts back inside you roughly, fucking your cervix. “You can't do that, you know? You've always belonged to me. Every part of you is mine, so no one else can touch you.” He cups your cheek, devouring your cries of pleasure with his mouth. “Just me... it's only me, right? I'm the person most important to you, right? You said so... So why are you bringing up another guy?”
He's asking questions, but he doesn't let you answer any of them, kissing you so much you almost can't breathe.
“Even though I'm in front of you...” Kiss. “Even when I'm the only one who loves you this much...” Kiss, kiss. “You're still thinking of another person...” Kiss, kiss, kiss. “That's hardly fair when you're all I think about everyday.” Another sloppy kiss.
You weakly push his chest, breaking away from the kiss. “Wait, Caleb—”
He pins your wrist to the bed. “I'm not stopping.”
“I'm not telling you to stop, I'm telling you to liste— ahh, haa, hnn!” The cock still ramming up your walls makes it much more difficult to speak, hammering against the sweet spot that makes your toes curl. “Fuck, ah— Caleb, listen to me!”
He hums as he sucks another hickey on your skin. “I am.”
You don't have it in you to argue even when he clearly isn't, trembling at the pleasure. The hand holding your wrist travels upwards to intertwine your fingers together, grounding you back to reality.
“Caleb, I was just— I didn't mean what I said...” you stammer, trying your best to speak without getting distracted. “I, mmh....! W-wouldn't do this with anyone else... haa... I just said that so you'd fuck me— ah, ah!”
He scoffs, slowing his pace when he sees you being overwhelmed. “You're just making excuses to get me to stop.”
“I'm not, you dummy! I...” your brows pinch together, embarrassed to say it but you continue anyway, “Caleb, you're the one I think of when I touch myself... nn... And I know it's wrong, and you only think of me as someone you should take care of, but, I, haah, I like it when you kiss me, or when you hug me, and I— gh! I like it when you fuck me hard, too, just like this...”
You move your hand to cup Caleb's jaw, admiring his awestruck expression. He looks at you like he's seeing you for the first time.
“I'm not telling you to stop,” you repeat yourself firmly. “I just wanted to say I didn't mean that thing I said earlier, and if it's you, you can do whatever you want to me. Because I love you just like how you love me, Caleb.”
His hips come to a complete stop. “Say that again.”
“I love you, Caleb.”
“Again.”
“I love you.”
“Again.”
“Okay, you're really pushing it, it's embarrassing to sa— aah!”
He grabs your hip, pulling you back to his cock. He fucks you frantically, harsh groans leaving his lips, your name like a prayer. “Fuck... you love me? You love... me?” The words seem unfamiliar on his tongue, heartbreakingly quiet. You squeeze your connected hands.
“I love you, Caleb. I really, really love you, I've loved you a long time ago...” you tilt his chin, making him meet your gaze. “Now say it back.”
“I love you,” he says with certainty, as if it's a fact of the universe. “I love you so much.” He buries his head into your neck, sucking new marks. “I love you... fuck... I love you so badly, it hurts...”
His cock drives deeper, the wet slaps of skin deafening in the room. Cum dribbles out of your hole with his thrusts, and he swipes it up to smear it on your engorged clit. Rub, rub. Rub, rub.
“Shit, Caleb!” You wail, rutting to his finger. “Everything feels so good, ah, ah!”
“You feel so good, too, aw, fuuuck...” he's melting inside you, your warm walls clenching around him so tight, sucking him back in every time he pulls out. “Your pussy keeps sucking me back in...!” 
“Ah, hnahh, ngh, yes, like that, ah! I'm cumming, cumming!”
His balls draw tight, his cock about to burst. “Fuck, shit!” he fucks in, in, in, until he's filled every space in your cunt, thumb frantically rubbing at your clit. Clear liquid soaks his cock, wetting his pelvis, and he follows you in your release, shooting ropes of milky cum deep inside your pussy. “Fuck, ah, take my cock, take my fucking cum all the way in, ohh— take it deep in your womb—”
He keeps cumming, and cumming, and cumming. “It won't stop,” he moans against your ear, watching your hole overflowing with his semen. “Your pussy feels too good, it's sucking me dry...”
“Caleb, shit, how are you still— ohh, fuuck...” you whine as the last spurts of semen hit your torso, Caleb having pulled out and pumping his dick to cover you in his cum.
Finally emptied, Caleb collapses on the spot beside you, running a hand through his hair. “I need a shower,” he mutters, feeling the stickiness on his body.
“We need a shower,” you correct him. “I probably won't be able to walk for the next few days, all thanks to you, so you better take responsibility and carry me everywhere.”
Caleb laughs, light and airy, nothing like the dark tone he's been speaking in earlier. He pulls you to his chest, pressing chaste kisses all over your face. “Anything for the girl I love.”
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the-fidgety-fiddler · 4 months ago
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Lowkey might have had a cataplectic episode on the subway tonight.... not cool not chill
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eraserbread · 3 months ago
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pregnancy hormones don't stand a chance around your husband, nanami ✧
→ needy pregnant f!reader, whipped nanami, sexually explicit content
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"hope that books not more interesting than me," you whisper, propped against the open bedroom door, dressed in nothing but a lacey babydoll lingerie set. your four-month pregnant belly peeks through the lace delicately, and your features are on fire.
kento gives you a little peek. "was wondering what took you so long." he's replying, flicking his book to the next page. you're standing, pouting in his presence.
"hello? i'm horny."
"and you do look very tantalizing in that outfit."
"so come take it off."
he gives you another look, this time lowering the leather-bound book enough to see his face. you pose, crossing your knees and jutting out your hip. you can feel those dark hazels fall over your jutting breasts, then to your widening hips, and finally to your swollen, pregnant belly. his little girl's home.
so, he sits up straight, shoving his book to the side table and ushering you over. "come on, love."
"needy girl..." kento is whispering against the back of your shoulder, pressing kisses there and letting them linger. you're hovering over his lap in reverse cowgirl, tongue pushed from your lips as you focus on staying steady.
"let me have it." you slur, cunt milking obsecnely over his bare lap. he's got a thick fist tight around his erection, making sure you're stable and comfortable before he lets you take him.
"i want you to, but i don't want you to hurt yourself... how about I be on top?"
"—no." you insist, shaking your head violently. he won't let the grip he has on your thighs loose, so all you can taste is the bulbous tip of his familiar, blushing cock.
"why do you insist on being so bratty?"
"I don't want to bottom, baby slides up and into my ribcage and ugh.." you're shivering, and if it wasn't for the abnormal influx of hormones, you'd be turned off just thinking about the pain.
the baby kento pressed into you all those months ago, was an active little girl. she kicked the hell out of you whenever you slept on your back, leading to long nights with little sleep. kento knows this, so why he's telling you to just lie there and take it, is lost on you.
though he's stubborn at times, kento is largely well-trained by you, so he lets you take him like this. his grip starts to loosen, and you can finally feel the stagnancy of his cock start to peek through your sticky folds and into you.
filled to the brim with need, you shiver instantaneously. "oh, please, pleaseplease. all the way—mmgh!!"
he's chuckling behind you—actually breathing a stupid laugh from his nose at your blatancy. "you're shaking already?"
to answer him —you're cumming, and it's a release you've never felt before. his fingers are pressing into your belly, keeping you strong and at his mercy as you cream helplessly all over him. your thighs are shaking, eyes rolling back into your skull as you cry and whine.
it feels like every single one of your nerve endings is being fanned and flamed, driving you absolutely apeshit like you've never been touched a day in your life.
"oh, baby... love."
"sh-shut up."
"that feel good?"
"keep—just keep going." you're begging, drool dripping from your lips as his cock massages that sticky, spongy bunch of nerves at an angle only his cock could hit. he's circling his hips under you, tongue tracing licks across your neck.
your pretty lace panties are ripped and disregarded as the night goes on, and your teddy is busting at the seams, sticking to sweat and dipping off your shoulders. kento's big hand reaches to cradle your swollen breasts, growling in your ear as he fucks you just right... so perfectly and deep that you can feel the slick cervix kisses every time he bottoms out.
you're crazy, and fucked off of five orgasms that night.
thank god for pregnancy hormones—thank god for your husband and all his raw talent. sure, he'll bicker softly just to ignite your needy fires, then he'd give you what you want, exactly how you want, until you're sick with it.
what a thoughtful husband.
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holeforzenin · 6 months ago
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Older boyfriend! Toji who never lets you leave the house to attend your classes without stuffing his bitter cum up your cunt in the morning. :(
It’s like seven in the morning and he’s sipping on the freshly brewed cup of coffee you made for him a few minutes earlier while the nasty, loud squelching of your soaked pussy sucking his dick in filled the early morning atmosphere.
Your plaid skirt is weakly brunched up around your waist, the fabric delicately ruffled, and your panties are struggling to stay hooked against your right cheek. You're practically drooling on the wooden dinner table like a little slut. Your poor legs are quivering and shaking in front of his muscular ones while he's just straight up blowing your back out from behind.
“Dear God, you hear how fucking mouthy this cunt is early in the morning?” He winced at the noise, cursing under his breath as he gazed down at his girthy cock disappearing into the warmth of your creamy hole. Every time he pulls his cock out, a glistening trail of cum shimmered at the thick base of his shaft, some even clinging to his curling pubic hairs like pearls in a tangled web.
“Aww is she thanking my cock for splitting her in half? How generous”.
Your whole body involuntarily trembles under the persistence of his roughness. each furious stroke of his angry tip skillfully hitting your sweet spot over and over with precise force sent shivers down your shine. “D-daddy m’gonna b-be late for class!” you managed to gasp out between whimpering moans. Your voice strained and ragged. But he just chuckles in response, his raspy laughter from his morning voice filling the room.
“Oh yeah? Yer not gonna anywhere till my seed is overflowing out this pretty pussy, darling”. He growls. His firm grip on your hips tightens, and his slender fingers kept digging into your soft skin— leaving marks that are going to remind you of his possession and roughness throughout the entire day.
“Fucking hell, you’re dripping everywhere. This cunt’s fucking soaked, it’s just seven in the morning and you’re already creaming like some horny slut” he grunts harshly, biting his bottom lip as he began bullying his cock in and out of you faster.
“Bet your classmates would love to see you like this, all messy and stuffed full with your older man’s cock”. The warmth of his breath creates a tantalizing contrast against your tender neck, making the tiny hairs from the back of your neck rise.
You bite your lips in an attempt to suppress the pathetic moan that was threatening to escape your lips from his humiliating words. Your body starts betraying you as you imagine the scandalized look on everyone’s face to see your boyfriend’s seed slowly steeping out your used cunt.
“N-no Toji, please…” you whimpered softly, your eyes screwed out and cunt clenching tighter around his veiny shaft.
“Fuck you’re so dirty, baby”. He silenced your pathetic noises with a rough kiss, his tongue invading your mouth just as his fat cock invaded your snugged cunny :(. He sucked on your tongue and swirled his around yours to exchange the stringy saliva. You can’t even think straight at this point, your mind a blur of pleasure and an overwhelming desire to please the older man.
With a sly grin, he gently withdrew from the kiss, his warm lips skimming down the curve of your jaw before settling on the delicate shell of your ear. A mischievous glint sparkled in his eyes as he whispered, “You want my fat load deep in this little cunt while you walk into class, feeling it leaking down your pretty thighs?”.
Your face flushed with an overwhelming wave of embarrassment as his hot breath caressed your ears, leaving you unable to form coherent thoughts. You could barely nod, already gone stupid from his abusing cock. “Mmm, that’s what I like to hear, good girl”. He praised with a smug and teasing tone. “I’ll give it all to you, don’t worry”.
“Yer such an obedient little cumslut for daddy aren’t ya doll? He questioned with a light chuckle. He’s always so amused by your fucked out state, he thinks you’re so adorable being dumbed down and stupid from his cock. Your slick, pulsating hole tightly embraces his throbbing cock, gripping onto him like you wanted to suck his soul out of his body.
The prominent veins of his cock rubbed against your velvety walls, massaging your insides and causing an overwhelming sensation of pleasure. He hissed loudly in your ear before speeding up his pace.
He felt your weeping cunt clenching tighter around him, like a vice, threatening to milk every last drop out. “Yeah that’s it, keep squeezing me. You’re so filthy baby, milk daddy’s cock dry” he slammed into you with renewed vigor, his heavy balls practically making love to your swollen clit with each powerful thrust.
Your moans turned into desperate cries, echoing through the morning air. Your needy pussy is spasming around his cock in a powerful orgasm. He could feel your juices flowing out, adding to the creamy mess between your plush thighs.
“Oh fuck, baby you’re making so much mess on Daddy’s cock, yer tryna mark me or something?” he hissed, his cock thumping with a familiar coil in his balls. “M’gonna breed this filthy pussy. Gonna fill it up so full that my seed is gonna leak out of you all day long”.
With one final thrust, he buried himself all the way inside of you— filling you up to the brim so his buttery cum spurts out into your womb. His cock was twitching and pulsating inside of you, making you whine and wiggle your ass back at him at the warm feeling as he emptied his fat load— jet after jet of hot cum shooting into your fucked out hole.
“Good God— fuckk!” the older man lets out a guttural growl, His large body shuddered as waves of pleasure coursed through him. With a possessive gesture, he wrapped his arm securely around your waist, pulling you close as both of you tried to calm your racing hearts and catch your breaths. His cock continued twitching as your heart raced in unison.
“Thereee we go doll, now you’re all stuffed n’ ready for class” he placed an affectionate kiss on your delicate neck, his breath ragged as he slowly withdrew his cock out of your stretched hole— being so careful that he doesn’t spill any of his precious sperm.
His cock slides out with a wet sound before he quickly reaches for your panties and pulled them over your ruined cunt. He gently pulled your skirt over your round ass and smoothed it so it didn't look all wrinkly and mashed up. So you’ll look like an actual neat and well-put together girl, as if you weren’t just fucked into a brainless slut seven in the fucking morning by your sex addict boyfriend.
“Meet me in the car and don’t make any of my fucking cum spill out of you or we’re gonna have to start again, you hear me?”
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lovermake · 2 months ago
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a little sweet treat ! ( ft jjk men )
synopsis : surprising your bf by wearing a panty with his name on it <3
content warnings : NSFW 18+ ( viewer discretion advised ), fingering, pussy eating, dirty talking, teasing, praise, pet names, slight dom / sub (ft toji), spanking, penetration, doggy style and riding, dominant Sukuna <3
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nanami
he wouldn’t notice at first, only notice you are wearing one of his shirts that covers most of you, and when you are kissing him a hello, whispering sweet suggestive nothings is when he’ll dig into the cloth of the shirt raising it up to your waist and see the soft blue panty with the letters “nanami’s” on it.
the lettering would be in a glittery silver and god would the sight of it make him go crazy. he’d tease you about it at first watching you fluster against him. but the teasing never lasts long with your husband for he’ll have you spread on the couch, not even to the bedroom because he needs to be between your legs immediately.
“F-fuck…” you whimpered, your fingers caress the back of Kento’s neck and your legs that sit on his shoulders shake. the way his tongue laps at your pussy, as if he’s been starved all his life makes your eyes roll back and your mind foggy. “I-I’m close.”
You attempt to push his head away to avoid cumming on his face, but he grabs your wrist and remains in place. “Let me taste you, darling.”
toji
the second he sees you enter the kitchen with nothing but panties (which was not uncommon) with his names on the back of it in velvet lettering, he immediately pounces on you. he teases you for a while, gently rubbing his fingers at the cloth knowing it’s what will get you started.
“dirty girl” he’ll call you, biting your ear lobe, and push the panties to the side to tease your soaked entrance. he would be so cocky talking about how your cunt was his and will only be his, as you whimper into his shoulder grinding yourself onto his fingers.
“a-ahh, toji” you whimpered his fingers thrusting deep inside of you. you keep pressing your body into his hand, his fingers stretching you open and despite the immense pleasure you crave for his cock. “p-please…”
“two isn’t enough for you princess?” he asks, before slipping a third finger unexpectedly and you jolt at the presence. you begin moaning incoherent words and he makes your neck with his teeth and tongue. it was going to be a very long morning for the two of you.
sukuna
at first there is no initial reaction and you feel as though you embarrassed yourself until it takes two minutes to get you from the first floor and up into the second floor into the bedroom you two share, with you on all fours; panties pushed to the side so that he can still see his name on the cloth, while his hands are glued to your waist and pounding deep into you.
your face is deep into a pillow, breasts hard and needy, and you are gripping tight onto the sheets as the pleasure is all so intense you can’t even think straight. moaning was out of question for you were screaming his name, and the sounds of his balls smacking against your clit.
“whose pussy is this?” you can hear him growl from behind you and your let out a pleasuring scream.
“yours, yours, yours!” you moan, and another moan falls loose as he slightly adjusts you so that his cock hits deeper and deeper. his nails are digging into your waist, the way his cock is hitting every spot and beyond, you swear all you can see is galaxies now. your pussy has never felt such grand pleasure and you tell yourself nothing will ever compete to this.
choso
your boyfriend almost looses it when he sees that you sit on his lap, in nothing but red panty that reads his name in gold. his face turns into a red shade as his hands shaking, grab at your waist. at first the two you grind into one another but that doesn’t compete ro the direction and satisfaction either of you will have when he is in you.
the panty rests on one of the chair and you are now bouncing on your boyfriends cock. your breasts are flying in every direction and he watches with such romance, nibbling softly at your neck as you yelp his name.
“fuck choso” you whimper and he moans in response as you continue to ride his dick. the way every inch of him satisfies you makes you want to lose your mind and stay doing this forever.
by how many times the two of you fuck you feel as though your pussy grew accustomed to him and only him. anytime you got tired he would take control and slam himself deep inside of you until you were ready for control again and god the gesture alone would make you squirt.
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beloveds-embrace · 8 months ago
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(Arranged marriage to duke john price except it means you married four instead of one 👁️👁️)
Your marriage to Duke Price is one out of necessity: you need a husband before high society begins rumoring you to be a barren woman and too old to be married off, and Duke Price needs a wife who is able to take on Duchess duties of his duchies.
You do not expect love, though you suppose it’d be a nice bonus. You are merely glad that Duke Price is a reasonable handsome man, and he informs you on your wedding night that he will not force himself on you, and there is no need to immediately begin attemtping for an heir.
You take admirably to your new duties, have been raised practically for this purpose though the head butler Kyle is wonderful in helping you as well- actually all the servants have been wonderful towards you. You have regular dinners with John, though they are a bit stilted but at least Chef Johnny’s food is good enough you can easily forget the tense atmosphere. You can tell your husband is hiding something- you are sometimes barred from going to his office to him, certain rooms are not allowed for you, and you are not allowed anywhere near the letters addressed to him- but as long as it isn’t hurting you, why should you bother him? So you never ask, and he seems happy enough that you don’t.
Until you accidentally stumble upon him and Duke Riley exchanging tongues. Very heatedly, hands grasping and tugging on each other’s clothes and Duke Riley sat on your husband’s desk.
It’s hot.
What’s not so hot is the way they both look at you when they realize you are there. You stutter, face a red so fierce it’d put a furnace to shame, and bolt out of the room despite hearing John call your name.
And you also skip out on the dinners for now, pretending you are sick with the help of your maids and their makeup skills.
But suddenly, it’s like your eyes have been opened. It’s not just Duke Riley who seems to hold a part of your husband’s heart; the one time you gather enough courage to maybe go speak with John and address the situation, you see Kyle stumbling out all disheveled and flushed, though he has a very satisfied air around him. He freezes when he sees you, and your jaw drops.
“My lady-“
“I- I’ll just- I’m taking a walk! Alone!”
You go to the kitchens instead, hoping that Johnny would have something delicious you can eat. Maybe something cold enough to wash away the blush on your cheeks.
Johnny is weirdly silent, however, even as he whips up chocolate mousse for you. His silence is not normal, it feels… almost guilty…
You sighs, take in a deep breath, and gather your dress. “Johnny… are you too…-?”
“Aye, m’lady. But-“
You can’t take it anymore. You leave the kitchens, and go straight back to your bedroom to bury your face in your bed. It’s not as if you are upset! It’s just- a rather befuddling situation?
Two nights later, it’s John himself who comes to you. You had assumed it was one of your maids returning with a new jar of oil for your nightly hair routine, but it’s your husband. You are glad it’s winter, and you aren’t simply in a thin nightgown.
“Wife.” He says, voice steady yet strained.
“John.”
You can’t call him husband. You’ve spent the last two days thinking and you were… rather sad. You were in the way of whatever they had (you saw Kyle and Johnny kissing, Johnny specifically sending food addressed to Duke Riley), weren’t you?
John sighs, sitting down on the settee while you remain on your vanity. After a moment of awkward silence, he opens his eyes and looks at you. “…what do you want to remain silent about this?”
You blink, raising an eyebrow. “…huh?”
John’s fists clench. “How much do you want in return for your silence?”
Frowning, you set your brush down and fully turn to him even if you feel exposed despite your thicker nightgown. “Is this about your… partners?” You say the word delicately, then shake your head. “I want nothing, John. If you are worried about me starting anything, I won’t. I just… hope this doesn’t mean you will divorce me?”
Being a divorced woman might as well be a death sentence on its own.
He looks at you, shocked into silence, and you quickly explain; his relationships have nothing to do with you and you aren’t a petty woman, who are you to come between what he and they have? You only hope this won’t take away the protection this marriage gave you.
That night, thus, you and John reach an agreement you are sure both of you are satisfied with.
Except, months later, John is no longer satisfied.
With the ice broken between the two of you. The dinners have become so much more… relaxing and comfortable, far less than they had been. No secrecy was needed when you were around anymore, and you only giggle and look away, feigning innocence when they share tender kisses between one another… and the less polite kisses.
John can’t remain satisfied with this arrangement. You are such a sweet thing, now that he’s become to know you far better. He can see the way his men are looking at you now, something between fondness and hunger and want; Kyle helps you far more often now, despite your insistence that you can do it yourself. Even when you do it yourself, he stays by you and ensures you are comfortable.
And he joins your evening walks, arms looped as the two of you speak, laughing and giggling.
It’s similar to your late night chats with Johnny, where he plies your full of sweets and desserts until even your dreams are full of sweeter kisses you are sure will never be for you. Johnny, who cooks your favorites on hard days and who you heard from Kyle is even more serious about only having the best of the best in vegetables and meats and seasonings.
And Duke Riley… for all his stoicism, he is gentle with you. Even when he’d stared at you with doubt and mistrust, no doubt believing you to be lying to John and simply waiting for the shoe to drop and for you to ruin them. Yet it never happens, and now, during the galas you attend all dolled up on John’s arm and ignoring all murmurs about still having no children, you even dance with him and giggle at his terribly dry jokes, even share a few of your own with him.
Steadily, slowly, obliviously, John has watched each of his men fall for you. This, obviously, made you theirs. It made you his, more and more than you already were.
It’s why your current request is making him clench his glass in his hand, with Kyle looking on in displeasure as well, giving him subtle glances.
“-So that’s why I was asking, John,” you remain sweetly oblivious, adorned in a pretty dress Simon had gotten for you recently. “He will not spread any rumors, I’ll personally make sure of that-”
Your cheeks darken then, and you glance away. “I- I am… merely a bit- unsatisfied, if you understand my point. And the stable man is loyal to you, he wouldn’t say anything.”
It’s clear he needs to keep a better watch over you. Where and when did you even interact with his stable boy, Graves? Though he focused on your words.
Unsatisfied.
Well, he can’t have that, can he? You’ve done your wifely duties so admirably, it’s about time he took care of you as well… and maybe dealt with the baseless barren rumors as well. A baby would keep you nice and content and focused on them alone, wouldn’t it?
Oh yes. Yes, it would.
dukedom au masterlist
Part two
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