#and honestly i don't think the setup was even THAT silly -- what did lisbon say in 4.24? he had to hit rock bottom and know it or something
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you don't get how crazy i'm going over this
#like....LIKE?????#not even talking about the lisbon of it all (we have to though these things are intrinsically connected but we're holding off for now)#i'm so....proud? of this little fictional man?#was the setup a little silly? maybe (but i loved every SECOND of it i can't BELIEVE i actually got a big blowout and a lowest point-#realization AND a rush to the airport confession that's SO)#this payoff was so SO worth it for me#and honestly i don't think the setup was even THAT silly -- what did lisbon say in 4.24? he had to hit rock bottom and know it or something#that's this. hurting her like this is his rock bottom (see you can't ignore the lisbon of it all - which i LOVE)#even with all the crazy shitty things he's done up until now; especially to HER; it was to get red john; he had that to fall back on#(not that he really saw it as a fallback but it gave him something else to focus on/something to justify his methods)#but after red john (episode not person) he doesn't have that anymore and he's been floundering ESPECIALLY when it comes to her#this wasn't a con (*not an official con) this was him doing something shitty and her finally having had enough#and him realizing just how right she's been; she was right on the first plane this season and she was right at the blue bird#and he's finally able to admit to himself just how much of a shit he's been...and then he's able to admit a lot of other things too#that little bit of honestly led to so much more and it let him FINALLY say out loud what they both knew (as much as they ignored it#or talked around it or pushed it down) and it let him say it without pretenses or expectations; just because#he 'needed to get to this' and she 'deserved to hear it' and i'm usually kind of meh on 'i needed to say it/you needed to hear it'#but this one; this one i GET#and i'm not explaining myself well at all i'm delirious but the point is this is SO well done and it feels DESERVED for me i love it#tm
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