#and he was just a bit to hot so danny went duck it o got an imortal boyfriend who's a hippie

[regonold]

Danny x ra's but their a fresh from a nasty breakup and danny is just going through the breakup motions watch your favourites eat ice cream cry all that jazz but in gotham why?

Because i want the bat's to come across this guy crying on a roof eat ice cream and comforing him trying to get him off the roof and when they ask what his boyfriends name is he juat says ra's fucking al ghul

"It's not fair" he whines "why are tge hot ones always the leaders of some murder cult"

I just want the bat's trying to wrap their head around the fact that this twink was sumhow dating ra's and presumably dumped him because he was the head of a murder cult and HOW IS HE STILL ALIVE

[burning-clutch]

Headstrong With Headstones

cross posted on a03: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30588233

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Ghosts are always around to ruin Danny’s day. Nothing new there, but what came of it when the Red huntress tackled him and sent them both through the ghost catcher? Well, this was new...

Warnings: descriptions of death-like trama, injuries 

Prompt by: EchoGhost

Valerie, as the Red Huntress, is chasing Phantom and they end up both accidentally flying through the Fenton Ghost Catcher together. This causes Danny to end up with the hunter suit and Valerie to end up with ghost powers. (Optional: When Val goes ghost she still looks exactly like Phantom.)

Whoo boy, this one was a ride! Fun to write though but boy! Did it get away from me! it’s a long one! Anyway, enjoy! Unbetaed.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“I am really hating these things!” Phantom called out as he flew about the area blasting another giant ant looking. 

He had no idea where these things came from or why but suddenly Amity was overrun with ant and bug ghosts that were just… everywhere. They were large, as far as bugs go, that is, ranging from the size of a house cat to a large dog, and each seemed to be either possessing citizens or stealing food to bring back for their queen. 

Why they needed physical food, Danny wasn’t sure, but he also wasn’t about to let them stick around to let them accomplish their goal to find out. He looked over his shoulder as Sam and Tucker wrestled with a thirty something woman who was howling in rage tied up in a Fenton fishing line before they tossed her through the Ghost Catcher to separate out the ghost bug from the woman. 

That done they blasted the ant ghost causing it to explode. “At least these things aren’t hard to destroy,” Tucker said, a disgusted look on his face. At least they had managed to get the catcher down here to the epicentre of the ant outbreak. Ant-break? Eh…. 

ng ghost. The ectoplasmic drone exploded into goo making Danny wince. “Ugh nasty... “ The halfa complained “At least we’re finally getting through them... “ Sam sighed in agreement. Though she would rather they catch the ghosts overblowing them up into goo she couldn’t deny the effectiveness. It was faster and more efficient to do rather than catch them in the thermoses and given they were only ecto constructs she couldn’t feel too bad about the whole thing. They just really needed to find the queen ant ghost sooner rather than later given that these things would never stop coming otherwise. 

“Come on Tuck there's more down here! I just saw, like, eight go down the alley,” Sam said to her current partner in ghost busting. Tucker groaned but readied his lipstick blaster nonetheless and followed closely behind the dark haired girl. 

Phantom watched them go before turning his attention back to the task at hand shooting through a random old man to pull out a ghost and explode that removed one as well as a larger one sneaking up on him all with the same large ecto blast. 

A call of triumph was soon changed into a call of pain as Phantom was suddenly shot in the back. "I don't know how you're involved in this but I know you are, ghost!" Came an all too familiar and rather unwelcome voice from behind the halfa. 

"Can we not right now Red?" Phantom complained. That shot between his shoulder blades had hurt! And he had really hoped that one of the ant ghosts had just been stronger than the others. Wishful thinking…

"Don't wanna hear your 'hero' spiel, ghost! Once I take care of you these bugs will be gone!" The Red Huntress spat back angrily. 

"Me being here, and those bugs are not connected!" Phantom called back in exasperation just barely dodging a blast from the hunter. 

"Stay still and let me end you ghost!"

"Tempting offer but, no. Gonna have to pass on that." Phantom called, aiming a shot and knocking the gun from Red's hands before trying to flee from her all the while still trying to round up the ghost bugs he came across. 

It didn't exactly bode well with Valerie. The huntress dove after her gun, catching it before it smashed to the ground below, and tearing after the monochromatic ghost. “Get back here you ectoplasmic skum!” She yowled punching the gas so to speak, as she tried to gain headway against Phantom’s much more agile form.

“Oh! Good one! Haven’t heard that one every day of my afterlife! You need new insults!” He taunted blasting an ant ghost before slipping underground hoping to shake the huntress. 

Red growled and brought up the information she’d need to track the menace in her visor eager to try and pinpoint where that jerk would be coming out. Thankfully her instruments didn’t fail her and she was able to see where he was, and got into position to head him off at the pass. 

When Phantom did reemerge he did so invisibly not that it made a difference to the hunter, her visor showing where he was rather accurately. She fired, landing the hit on Phantom forcing him to drop his invisibility and jump back into the normal visible spectrum. 

The ghost blinked at her stupidly a moment before asking, “New upgrades?” 

“Yes, All the better to take revenge on you!” 

“You’re still on about that?! You know I’m the ghost in this relationship, right? I’m supposed to be the one with the obsession?” He called only to let out a yelp and dodge down out of the way of the incoming missiles barely a second later. 

“The only relationship we have is hunter and prey!” Red called out in rage making Phantom grimace. 

The ghost turned to shoot any of the tracking missiles that were still coming at him before telling the girl, “You know you sound like Skulker right?! Like ew!” 

“Shut up! You have no idea what this is like!” 

“I was alive once ya know” Phantom argued back dodging another volley of shots and ducking down weaving under a billboard. “If anything you’re the one who doesn’t understand! Not to mention the anger issues!” 

“I’ll show you anger issues!” Red quipped back yelping as her gun was shot out of her hand and exploded into bits from a follow up shot from Phantom.  She was nearly out of ammo for that one anyway… 

Still, she gave pursuit, even if she was ill prepared, given how fast she booked it out and after that stupid spectre when he appeared on her radar she was a little light, not that it mattered. Still, she hated to admit but she was well aware that if these bug things were Phantom’s he wouldn’t just be destroying them… it didn’t fit his MO.

Then again this was a ghost they were looking at as if they had any rational thought or feelings whatsoever! She could almost laugh at the thought. A ghost with actual feelings. HA! No matter though this time, this time she’d have him… he was weak after fighting all those other ghosts after all those minor literal bugs that needed to be squashed. She would take care of Phantom first then finish the mess he undoubtedly created. 

Red let out a growl of frustration as her shots went wide, her anger causing her to miss, she knew it was that but she found herself seeing, well, red. She yelped at the burn her hand and arm sustained as Phantom blasted at her gun again, sort of missing his target and causing the weapon to explode in her hand. Of course, that only served to make her madder. 

Well, desperate times call for desperate measures. 

While Phantom was gloating about his shot or some other such thing, no that sorry was sarcastic! How could it be anything else from a ghost?! She shot forward at top speed, the motor in her board whirring and whining in dismay as she punished it for all it had, slamming into Phantom and more or less tackling him with her board. 

He yelped in surprise and she activated the stinger prod on the end of the board giving the stupid ghost a good amount of electricity. 

Phantom screeched something fierce, a horrid sound that she had never heard before and his eyes widened in fear.  GOOD! He finally knew to fear her! She shocked him again still moving forward to keep him on the end of her board.

In her delirium of finally getting something in on that stupid ghost she wasn’t exactly looking where she was steering, and well, to say she was shocked when she had passed through the Ghost catcher would be an understatement. 

Pain, that’s all her mind knew, and that’s all Phantom’s knew as well as the ghostly energies and anti-energies hit the semi permeable film of the catcher. Valerie screeched, her own pitch seeming to match Phantom’s as they passed through. 

She hears herself grunt, but it didn’t come from her own throat. 

She felt herself groaning, but it sounded much too deep… 

"What?" She heard her voice ask. "I- o-oh wait… Valerie!?"

The Huntress in question opened her eyes and blinked a few times staring at her own visor, and it took her a few seconds to realize what exactly she was looking at. Frantically she stands up or at least tries to, given she floated upwards towards the sky. Her robotic suit is now replaced with a black and white skin tight suit. 

Phantom on the other hand had instantly felt heavy and hot. But when he saw a semi red tinted version of his own glowing green eyes staring back at him, the sparking ghost catcher in the background…

Well, his first thought was he separated from himself... but he still felt like himself and thought as he normally would… but then... hearing Valerie's voice come out of his own throat?

"Well shit" Danny managed to say smartly

Valerie screamed realizing she was looking at herself, her body, still in her Huntress suit. She waved her arms as she yelled obscenities, joining in Phantom’s own frantic flailing as the ghost boy tried to calm her down.

" Phantom what did you do? How dare you take over my body! Why am I stuck in your gross floaty one?!” The huntress turned ghost screeched. 

“You think I planned this? I don’t wanna be a girl! This is your fault you’re the one who threw us through the catcher! You should know by now that m- The Fenton’s inventions do some whack stuff!” Danny argued hauling himself up to his feet properly and flailing his arms in circles to keep balance. He was both not used to being (fully) human as well as having a different centre of gravity, not to mention the suit covering his new form. 

This wasn’t like possession at all. With that, it was like wearing a tight suit. It wasn’t too terrible overall but at the same time you instinctively knew how to move within one, this was a whole new experience, like being given stilts and set onto a tightrope and told to cross the canyon, all with an additional fifty pounds strapped to you.

“I can’t even begin to tell you how mad I am at this!”  Valerie said as she grabbed onto a crack in the concrete to keep herself from floating away before face planting into the gravel and grunting. Phantom couldn’t help but smirk behind the visor despite himself. “Are you? Because the way I see it you’re the ghost, your anger isn’t real, your feelings are just remnants of what you remember anger to be.” He shot her condescending look that was hidden behind the helmet, but oh! It felt good to throw that back at her.

“What!? No! That is not how this works, ghost!” Valerie screeched out, reaching a rather impressive octave with his vocal cords. 

“Actually it completely is. I’m not possessing you, otherwise, my “body”-” He held up his fingers to do the air quotes here “-wouldn’t still be here, and it definitely wouldn’t do this when I overshadow someone.” 

“Why you!”

“Hey chill all we gotta do is go back through the-” Danny’s voice dropped off into silence as he stared up at the ghost catcher with a deepening frown. The center where the ethereal ‘thread’ of the catcher was had broken leaving a fancy looking bubble ring at best and a really bad eye of Sauron at worst. 

“Okay, New plan we get that fixed and then we can get this whole thing straightened around,'' Phantom said with a firm nod to himself after flailing his hands back and forth to himself and… himself… oh his head was going to hurt. 

Valerie yelped as her feet started to sink through the concrete, causing Phantom to snort. “Not so easy is it?” He retorted smugly doing his best impression of a bitchy prep, now that he had the vocal cords for it. Though when he realized that the slow descent into the concrete wasn’t stopping making the asphalt look more like quicksand than anything, Danny rushed forward to grab the ghostly upper arm.

He was glad for once that this suit had anti phase capabilities. Valerie on the other hand had a gambit of emotions cross her face. Confusion and fear were being the most prominent as well as anger. 

And how could she not! That ghost had her body, and while he had made the mention of her emotions not being ‘real’ she knew that it was because her brain and whatever her consciousness was made up of was over here in Phantom. He was still the same evil conniving ghost as always and she wasn’t sure how he had planned this, but she just knew that this was a plot of some kind to make her life even more of a hell for her. 

Still, phasing through things she could do without. “You have to focus on staying solid as your body, er my body I guess, will naturally want to turn intangible. The same thing with flight, you have to will yourself to stay on the ground, your default is to float so if you want to stay in one spot you have to will yourself there…. It- It’s like have you ever had a lucid dream?” 

Valerie blinked at the ghost, her? … at the words before they actually registered. Why would he bother trying to help her? Wouldn't it be easier to have her crippled under a new body and new powers and all the confusion that surrounds it? 

“What?” She said after a moment of thought. He had to be tricking her somehow with this right? There’s no way… “As if I’d trust anything you have to say.” 

“What?! Don’t be stupid that is my body! I spent long enough accidentally phasing through stuff that I learned how to will myself to work!” Phantom argued indignantly. 

"Fine" she snapped out, relenting slightly, but only just. She figured that if, and that's an IF the size of a planet… if he really didn't somehow plan this She supposed it wouldn't hurt to try what he was saying. After all, if she didn't play nice, why knows what crimes he'll commit while inhabiting her body.

Valerie shuddered as a good number of thoughts entered her head about what Phantom could potentially do with her body. Make her look like a fool, ruin her reputation! … What could she do in Phantoms? How was this real? How did that… whatever of the Fentons make this happen? Thinking about this too much would undoubtedly make her head hurt. 

Right focus, keep yourself solid. “It’s harder than it looks, you know. Like I said when I had that whole thing with Cujo I couldn’t control myself entirely and controlling him too, well….” Phantom piped up earning a glare from the huntress. 

“Shut up!” Valerie roared earning a blast of sound from her jaws as she had the bar start of a ghostly wail.

Phantom squawked and covered his ears, thankful the helmet was still on given it blocked out a good amount of the sound. “Easy your emotions make you- my powers go haywire!” 

“Valerie’s eyes widened as she stared at the small trail of destruction she had caused. It… it was that easy to flip over three cars and punch a hole in a building?! And phantom… Phantom held this kind of raw power? Well, now she did... This pure, unrestrained power that was so hard to control and if she focused she could feel it just below the surface in her chest, running outward and under her skin like an electric current, writhing through her veins like caterpillars. 

She was disgusted by it… she was thrilled by it… she was genuinely afraid of it…

“Y-You can just…” She trailed off. She didn’t want to say what she had done, what she had just seen, or acknowledge what she was still seeing… that trail of rubble there, she didn’t want to talk about it… as about it, but she had to… and yet, she didn’t want it to be made real by her accepting it...

“Like I said it takes a while to learn control.” Phantom offered simply. 

“Stay right where you are spook!” Jack Fenton’s voice was suddenly echoing down the street causing Danny to instinctively throw up his hands before giving an “Oh wait.” and looking to Val with a mix of emotions on his face. 

“He’s talking to you” Phantom taunted knowingly. At least Jack was a bit of a ways off, though closing in fast… They had at least a minute for him to get into firing range.

“What no! You’re the ghost!” 

“Not from where I’m standing.” Phantom shot back hotly, and he was right… technically… And Valerie really hated that he was right! “We gotta get you, me, US We gotta get outta here!” Phantom stammered out, grabbing the ghost’s arm before bolting down the nearest alleyway. Danny shoved Valerie in his body back deeper into the dark of the alley wincing as he realized she may need to transform. Then again… “How do I use your board?” Phantom half asked half yelled out  at the huntress, grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to look into her own panicked eyes. 

“Why should I tell you?!” She spat back indignantly. Thankfully, or rather unluckily depending on how you look at it, an ectoblast shot their way clipping an overhead fire escape and pinging off the metal. Phantom simply threw his arm up towards the scorch mark with a huff of his own. “You wanna feel what those are like?” He says eyes narrowing the visors glow seemed to enhance the effect. 

“Ugh fine,” Though it was meant to sound like reluctant compliance, the hitch in the tone gave her worry away. “Just jump into the air and call it up like mentally.” 

He huffed and jumped up, only to land back down a second later with a frown. Again he tried going higher in his jump and clicking his heels together, this time it spawned the board but he simply hovered there on it. “And to fly?” Phantom asked ducking out of pure instinct as another ecto shot flew their way.

“Like surfing, or skateboarding Lean the way you want to go, put the pressure on your front foot for up and back for down.” Came the semi-rushed answer. Phantom nodded, grabbed Valerie and shot up like a rocket. The ghost let out a yelp and ended up overcompensating, sending them into a barrel roll as they climbed up into the clouds. By the time he managed to regain control he felt like he was going to barf, but Valerie only looked mildly annoyed. “Electromagnetic boots?” He asked wobbling a bit as he tried to haul his counterpart onto the board. 

“Yep,” Came the answer as Valerie settled on the edge of the board with a defeated sigh. 

“Just so you know I’m still blaming you for this. The only reason I’m playing nice with you right now is because I know if I don’t you’ll mess up something in my body or my suit.” Valerie hissed after a moment’s silence. 

“Right ‘cuz I was totally the one who tackled us through that catcher.” Came the bitter retort. “I wish just once you would listen to me! Those ants are not my fault!” 

“Then why bother trying to do anything about it?! Ghosts only want to manipulate people and I know if you’re not responsible for this mess then you’re making hay in the sunshine and taking advantage so that you can force people to view you as a hero,” She spat out making a scrunched face that very much did not belong on Phantom’s features. 

“What? No! If I could do that don’t you think I would have?” 

“Maybe you’re just not strong enough yet, need more believers or something.” 

“You saw what ‘power’ I actually have Valerie, hell you used some of it! And by accident!” 

“Well,” She sputtered shifting uncomfortably unable to deny what she had seen, done… what she could still sort of make out from here.

“And what was with the electricity earlier? That is beyond cruel you know! Keeping that up as long as you did!” Phantom raged the cybernetics seeming to respond in kind, a small laser popping out of his shoulder which the former halfa growled at and physically pushed back down to get it to go away.

“You’re a ghost! You don’t feel pain in the same way humans do.” Valery shot back reciting the rote excuse he had heard far too often. 

Phantom saw red, and not just because of the visor he was currently forced to wear. So he did the only thing that his brain could think of. He slapped himself in the face. “OW! What the hell Phant-?!”

“Oh shut up! The pain’s all in your head! It’s not real! You’re just imagining it! You’re simply an imprint of who you once were, you’re not a person anymore, and feelings aren’t real because you're not human!” Phantom ranted and raved. When he was done he found himself panting heavily the excursion much more mental but ANCIENTS did it feel good to finally do that and scream and not take out a city block. 

“Do you remember your time as Valerie Grey?” he asked after a few moments of getting his breathing in check.

“W-What? Are you stupid of course I do!” Valerie responded instantly, creeped out that the ghost knew her full name and identity but given the display of raw anger she had just witnessed she smartly decided to not bother to hedge that issue just yet.  “We only just had this mess happen…” She offered up not fully sure what more to say. 

“So you can say you died at that moment, well congrats, you’re no longer the person you once were, you’re not Valerie any longer, you are an imprint of what that person was and your memories of being human mean nothing.” Phantom hissed out lowly. This time he wasn’t shouting, but his tone was the purest sour thing she had ever heard come out of any single person.

“Well, I’m you.” She stated dumbly. Even though she was looking at herself and it was sort of an uncanny valley sort of thing to be looking at she still saw Phantom, raw feral and angry… The fact that she was technically the more powerful of them right now didn’t even register. 

“That doesn’t matter, you’re not me you’re a ghost. It doesn’t matter who you were before you’re a ghost now and that’s all they’ll ever see.”  He was shaking in barely constrained anger now. Valerie at least had the wherewithal to know that if positions were reversed and she was feeling the fury that the other was putting out, she would have come at the subject of her ire guns blazing...

Valerie opened her mouth and closed it a few times realizing something. She could literally feel the rage and sadness flowing out of the ghost controlling her body. She wanted to believe it was simply that the ghost was in HER body that the emotions were prevalent, but they were far too strong to be imitations…

 She knew why she could feel, could taste, the emotions coming out of the other, and how it seemed to give a small boost of energy. It was sort of like eating something really sugary, the small jolt she got with it wouldn’t last long and she knew it instinctively, but the fact it gave a boost at all… Ghosts couldn’t feed on other ghost’s emotions… it’s one of the reasons they attacked humans after all…

She wanted to retort to the spectre snap at him like she always would but she couldn’t find it in herself… she simply felt… deflated... And it wasn’t just because her arm had all but disappeared into a wisp of smoke either…

She swallowed thickly letting the stupid ghost arm do whatever it wanted (why did she have to control these body parts) and took in a deep sigh. “You said the shock was cruel… Why?” She wondered after a moment. 

Phantom had somehow managed to figure out how to open and disappear the helmet while Valerie was staring down at her, his, gloved hands, so it was a shock to see the whirlwind of storm clouds behind her own eyes. Phantom was always expressive, but it seemed to hit her harder seeing it on her own face… it looked far too real, too convincing in her own dark eyes.

“Take off the glove, the right one.” He says simply, almost too softly for her to hear.

It confused her, she hadn’t thought a ghost’s clothing could be removed… but, she did. There was little she would have thought to have seen under the glove but this? This wasn’t anything she was prepared for.

The fingers on the hand were deathly pale, but with a green underlay that was especially noticeable in the fingernails. Not a surprise really there… but just before the third knuckles the back of the hand started to deepen looking almost like something you’d find on an eighty year old, or a bit of dried wood one would toss in a fire, before fading back out and becoming the tanned green colour at the wrist that Phantom sported on his face. 

Litchendburg scars were obvious and prevalent along the back of the hand, worsening into an almost perfect circle on his palm, about the size of a quarter and indented just a little bit. Now that she was looking at it, it was like his hand was burned clean through on the palm…. And those lightning bolt shaped scars, well, she knew what that meant. 

“Death marks,” Phantom says simply almost reading her mind as she stared at the palm. “It’s exactly what you think it was and the scars snake around my arm all the way to my chest…. Kinda figure the whole thing exploded my heart and that’s what actually killed me...”

 “And… You remember it?” Valerie asked, eyes widening in realization. Somehow talking to the ghost boy like this with his words coming out of her mouth… it seemed to make this all the more validating to her like she was finally hearing him for the first time… She probably was, now that she’d thought about it…

“Yeah, I remember a lot of my life… not everything mind you but it’s like remembering a dream you had the morning after…” Phantom says softly. That much was true, despite his halfa status, everything from before he became a half ghost was kind of hazy at best and shrouded in a dream like fog at worst. There were some memories he had that if he didn’t see photo evidence for it, he would have chalked it up to a kind of lucid dream…

“Oh,” Valerie said. What could she say to that? “And the ghost powers..? They weren’t innate and instinctual like the Fenton’s say were they?” 

“No, it has been a trial by fire since the first day I died…” Phantom responded solemnly 

She felt like dirt, and she glared at her whispering body before scrunching up her face and willing herself solid. She couldn’t control what her body was doing, she had no idea how to work any of… this! How many times had Phantom told her it was an accident and she refused to believe him?!

It was only now was she seeing the ghost she had been actively and relentlessly hunting as simply a teen who got thrown in too deep too fast over his head and was trying to make the most of it. Though there was one thing she didn’t quite understand, and she had wondered about it since she had first laid eyes on the odd monochromatic ghost.

“Why do you attack other ghosts at all?” She asked simply giving into her wondering. 

“Because I wanna protect the people I left behind…” He answered earnestly

Valerie thought about that, he had said it before sure, but somehow it felt different this time he’d said it. Maybe she was overthinking it now? Or this was the first time she had given it any thought at all? 

She stared down at her, at  Phantom’s ungloved hand with a frown. Maybe he wanted to protect people to save people because no one came to save him? Almost sounded like too noble a thought to be wasted on some dumb ghost…

She shook her head wanting to end that train and derail it before it even left the station. She knew damn well it was her own anger and brashness that got her into this whole freaky Friday thing, but she would never admit to it aloud...

“How do we fix this?” She asked after a few more beats of listening to the soft whirring of the hoverboard beneath her. 

“The Fenton Catcher got us into this, the Fenton Catcher can get us out,” Danny said simply. “IT’s like I was saying earlier. The electricity you were hitting me with overloaded the catcher and made it go haywire but luckily there is a reverse side to the thing, we just gotta hope the Fentons either fix the one that got fried or we hope they have a spare.” Phantom replied candidly. With a hum, the ghost boy tapped a finger on his, her lip. 

The action was so normal yet so bewildering to her as she watched herself perform it. It was clearly something unconscious he did, given the thousand yard stare he had going on there… Phantom makes her go crosseyed and she couldn’t help but snort. 

Danny knew full well there was a duplicate, well, sort of, of The Catcher in the lab, but the problem was he didn’t know where exactly it was. Secondly, he needed to be sure if it was worth the risk to try and use the catcher 1.0 when it was the updated version that they had been messed up by... The one they also destroyed. 

Well… today seemed to be a sharing and show and tell kind of day so, “Valerie, there's an inside pocket on that suit, the zipper is under the collar since you probably can’t phase through yourself with any sort of control… Um, in that pocket there's a cell phone. Can you grab it and hand it to me?” 

“You have a cell phone?” She asked her, his, nose crinkling up giving a look that clearly thought he was a stalker or something. 

“Yes, a friend got it for me…. And before you say anything... Yes, I have friends, NO they are not evil… mostly, and the cellphone is paid for by them.” Phantom preemptively rattled off holding out his hand expectantly. 

Valerie grunted in acknowledgement before fumbling about under the collar of the suit and finding the zipper. “What kind of ghost needs a zipper?” 

“Don’t judge, I didn’t get to choose what I died in, you know.” Phantom huffed out impatiently. 

Valerie blinked and grimaced, sort of feeling bad about the complaint now, though it was instantly rectified by Phantom’s next comment. “Hey lighten up, just gotta laugh at my grave sense of humour.” 

“I will smack you… ugh, I can’t believe I’m undressing a ghost… Here’s your damn phone.” Valerie grumbled pointedly averting her eyes away from the ghost’s bare chest, acting as though she didn’t want to see anything she shouldn’t, in reality, she just didn’t want to see any more scarring and see it as though they were on her body. As it was she’ll be surprised enough if she doesn’t have nightmares.

She was already imagining herself being in Phantom’s spot, burning as you’re being electrocuted. Feeling your heart sputter and stop before being reborn as a ghost confused and lost still remembering everything and knowing you’ve died? She shuddered, and could only hope she would never become a ghost. Having that loom over you every time you saw your reflection didn’t sound like fun at all...

Phantom takes his phone, a flip phone that thankfully, was only ever used for his Phantom needs, and only contained three contacts, Jazz, Sam, and Tucker. Sam paid the bill for him and was a good fail safe if his parents ever punished his human half by taking away his electronics or if he ever had to leave in a hurry he had a secured line that shouldn’t be tied to him really in any way. 

And right now it would work to make sure Valerie doesn’t see a phone was the same as Fenton’s. He flipped open the device, the clamshell was indestructible (mostly) and cheap! By Sam’s standards anyhow, fifty bucks may be nothing to her on her allowance but Danny would have to save up a month to get there. HE shook his head from his musings to focus on the task at hand, sending out a message to the group text asking his friends to either convince his parents to fix the ghost catcher or to retrieve the 1.0 version and set it up somewhere for him to try and fix a problem. He left it vague, apart from telling them he wasn’t exactly himself at the moment, which prompted an instant slew of worried texts from the three people in the chat chain but, well, he could deal with that later, he wrangled the ’ghostkateers’ back in and set them on their way. He just had to hope that he could get through this with his alternative identity intact. 

“What was all that about?” Valerie asked suspiciously. 

Ah, there it was… “I have contact with the Fenton kids… They help me get some of their parents stuff when I need it…. Didn’t you wonder why that Fenton Ghost Catcher was even in the middle of town in the first place?”  Phantom said with a raised brow.

Valerie blinked in thought. She honestly hadn’t put that much thought into it. The Fenton adults had said that Phantom stole their stuff all the time and she’d simply left it at that. Why would she have wasted brain power on it? Though the more she thought about it the more she frowned. 

Phantom was a ghost so just how had he been stealing things from the ghost hunters when they clearly had made and marketed things that stop and keep out ghosts? Phantom needed someone who could actually grab the stuff he needed, to get through the shields… someone(s) who were on the inside, and given how Danny would sometimes meekly defend Phantom, or how Jazz would sometimes ‘trip up’ her parents when they were going after Phantom, well…

Yeah, she really was blinded by her own rage and prejudices… Star was right on that, she supposed… too pinpointed on the small things that were pissing her off the most to focus on the bigger picture going on around her…

She shook her head before burying it in her hands. Ugh, stupid ghost making her question herself.

Phantom sighed and handed the phone back to her instructing her to tuck it away again. Curious she flipped it open and stared at the passcode ask that popped up. She didn’t even think flip phones had passcodes but whatever. She tried to make it look like she was playing with the phone flipping it and closing it, rather than actually trying to snoop… though the scoff from Phantom told her the ruse was pointless. She sighed and put the phone back where she found it. 

Phantom had started grumbling about something under his breath earning a look of confusion from Valerie, though it didn’t take long for her to see what it was he was upset about, as he was trying to get the board to go. Valerie knew she should probably help him but at the same time, she was all too content to simply sit here and sulk.

It was a scream from somewhere below that snapped her from her spiralling thoughts of self depreciation. She instantly noticed two things; firstly how low her glow had become around her arms when she found a particular interest in the stitching in the gloves Phantom wore… and secondly, the scream was almost like a beacon to her, calling her out of her thoughts and making her want to go. 

She felt anxious and antsy all of a sudden like she had to go somewhere, but couldn't. Like when one has to pee really bad but it's during a test, that split if need to go need to stay...she didn't know how to get Phantom's flight to work for her, but she wanted to figure out what the screaming was about… 

Her legs jostle and bounce as she tries to quell the nervous energy she feels building. Why was she suddenly feeling this way? She steals a glance at Phantom, snorting when she sees him trying to unstick himself from the board but another scream for help pulls her attention back to the ground below. 

She could taste the frustration from Phantom and given his growls towards the board he was standing on it was obvious where that was from, but it sort of irked her that he had no urgency about him. Couldn't he hear the screams why weren't they helping!? She had to help! She knew she could so she should! She HAD to even if she didn't know how to help she HAD to… she was compelled to.

"What are you doing? There are people who need help!" She spat feeling her agitation and anxiety rise. Phantom looked to her dumbly before looking down to the ground and noticing the chaos. “Huh…” He said simply eyes lazily roaming the crowd. 

“What do you mean ‘huh?’ This is serious!” Valerie didn’t know why but she felt so much like a caged cat right now wanting to get at some prey that was just beyond her reach. She was almost positive that if she could she would be pacing back and forth on that board.

Phantom watched her twitching, her glow brightening and dimming and her anxiousness that made her look like she was getting ready to jump off this board, damned be the consequences, and he slowly felt a smirk form on his face much to the agitation of the huntress currently in his body. “It’s interesting, I mean��� I’m watching this and well, I’m doing what you’re doing… it’s almost a relief” He chuckled dryly. “Jeez, guess I’m really not as much of a hero as I thought I was…” He says almost sadly before running a hand through his, her, hair. 

“Phantom now is not the time to be cryptic! There are people down there who need …. Help…” Her anger suddenly ebbed away as she realized just what Phantom was getting at. How many times had the ghost told her that he just wanted to help? He always had a desperate insanity to his voice when he was tied down by her or some other ghost and he frantically would do anything he could to get out there to HELP.  

“That’s your obsession, isn’t it... “ She clutched at Phantom’s jumpsuit over the ache in her chest where she could feel the ghostly core vibrating violently demanding retribution. It physically hurt, made her want to throw up and she knew the only thing to stop that feeling was to help. 

Perhaps that’s why he was always involved, it was exactly the reason he said it was... He literally had no choice but to help when he saw something he could do… Was that why he was often seen helping out with inane tasks? Carrying things for people rescuing people… hell even rescuing a balloon from a tree for a little kid… He was literally trapped in an endless cycle.

Perhaps her earlier ideas of Phantom wanting to help because he didn’t get help when he needed it most wasn’t so far off. But feeling this now, in his body… it was awful to think that if she had gotten herself killed while chasing Phantom or some other ghost, she would be trapped in a similar cycle, but be even less noble… not to say Phantom was noble but that her ‘quest’ was rather unnoble. 

“Yeah…  guess it is…” Phantom answered sourly as he stared down at the chaos. He wanted to be a hero, he thought he was, he was helping people, saving people, after all right? Though thinking about this revelation…? It seemed to sour the point of him being a hero. If he wasn’t making the choice to help and to save people but being forced to do it… Was he really a hero?

His shoulders slumped as he watched the ghosts attack below. Even still now, he could make the choice right? He may not have his usual repertoire of powers he was used to but Red still had her suit, the suit he was currently occupying.

And looking to the huntress in his body he couldn't help but smirk. At least she would finally be more focused on saving people than shooting him. "Like a skateboard ya said right?" He asked, suddenly earning a bewildered look from the huntress. 

She caught on quickly though, the small smirk appeared on her lips though it looked more conniving on Danny's face. "Yeah, and you think about the guns you want to will them out of the cybernetics." She added.

"For Ectoblasts, do you feel that cold spot in your chest, my chest?" At her nod, he continues. "Force that out and down your arm, gather it in your palm and let it go." He explained eyes narrowing.

Valerie caught on and nodded. "I'll take the left side you take right?" She asked eagerly, wanting to help the people below, not caring that she would be working with Phantom to get it done.

He was making a choice this time. Even if it wasn't him who would be hailed as the hero, given his current attire and whatnot but he wasn't being forced to make this decision. That had to count for something right? 

He grunted as he fumbled around his head trying to put the helmet back up over his head. It takes him a few moments but he was able to get it eventually. He gives a nod and after a few experimental wiggles, he manages to get the hoverboard to sputter forward. He manages to move a little smoother by the time he gets closer to the ground willing out a blaster, he was hoping for something with a little more oomph but well, a wrist blaster worked too he supposed. He sees an ant ghost and fires, following up with more and more taking care of all in his sightlines. He gives a small "sorry!" As he almost knocks someone over but otherwise he seemed to be getting somewhere. 

Valerie on the other hand had stood up into a sort of half crouch and was frantically waving her arm around trying to build the power in her blast hoping she could manage at least one shot. With a growl, she manages to get her hand to glow a bit green, which was progress, but not enough to create an effective attack. She shook her hand again, smacking her wrist a bit as though it were a buggy flashlight, before she was able to send out something a little more decent.

“Heh got ya!” She called out grinning at her mitt of ectoplasm, She may have only burned a hole through a street sign but hey, she got a hit on something so she was still going to count it as a win. “Over here!” Danny perked up hearing Jazz call pointing to the ghost catcher 1.0. Suppose it was better than nothing. He hoped it would do to only have themselves go through the catcher again and not have to recreate the whole process because, ow. The ghost turned huntress pitched a bit sharply earning a growling reprimand from Valerie, though it was quickly rectified by him blasting an ant ghost that was getting ready to jump at them. 

It let out a horrid caterwauling noise, something that made their ears ring from the sound, “Ugh that’s worse than your screaming.” Phantom commented wincing a bit behind the visor, sighing in relief when the noise went silent.

“Ugh, really?” Valerie shot back though she could just make out the playful smirk that was showing on his face. Valerie opened her mouth to retort only to yelp as they pitched a hard right turn and went skyward. She didn’t need to ask why as the large queen ant ghost emerged from the ground. 

The thing was as tall as a small building and as long as a transport truck. And the thing let out a wail that sounded like a mix of a lion and a hog squealing. “Well… That’s bigger than I thought it would be... “ Phantom said with a frown. “I don’t know if I can beat this thing in your body… We gotta get to that catcher!” He called.

The ant queen let out another roar and sent a bit of... Acidic goo... Vomit... stuff towards them. Valerie didn’t want to think too hard on it. Honestly, it looked like ecto snot but came out of what she hoped was the and queens mouth… “Ugh nasty.” She complained watching as the wad of snot sailed over them and into a building, melting it a bit. 

“Yeah, let’s not get hit by that…” Phantom agreed, watching the brick melt away. “I need shields and you need to get your guns back.” He said scanning the ground around the queen to search for where the Catcher had landed. 

“There!” Valerie seemed to catch on to what he was looking for and pointed it out spotting it first. At least they were in agreement on the fact they needed to swap back sooner rather than later.

Phantom leaned forward urging the board on towards the catcher hoping they would manage it in one swoop. Alas, it was not to be as the queen jumped into the air up at them, let out a roar before massive wings sprouted from her back smacking Danny and Valerie off the board, the electromagnetic functions in the huntresses suit doing nothing against the force of that hit. 

They plummet downwards and Phantom tries to call out to the board but it doesn’t come for him. “Valerie fly!” He tries desperately, staring down to the fastly approaching ground. “Will yourself to fly!” 

Valerie gasped out herself grunting as Danny flailed her body about before managing to cling to her. “I’m trying!” She shoots back angrily. She lets out a whine and closes her eyes in concentration before the glow around the ghostly body flares and they level out and tip upwards, earning a whoop of delight from Phantom. 

“Head for the Catcher!” Phantom tells her.

“Again I’m trying you ectoplasmic pice of-”

Whatever she was going to say was cut off as they, by some miracle, had managed to head straight through the catcher. The pairs’ screams mix together and they end up on a heap on the other side with Jazz blinking down at them. “Did it work?” The ginger teen asked.

“Ow... Jazz?” Danny grumbled out. He raised a hand to his head to rub at his forehead and gave a pained whooped when he was able to see the glowing glove at the end of his limb. He offers a half hearted smile up to his sister before glaring at the queen who was being distracted by Sam and Tucker from wherever they had found cover in the nearby broken buildings.  

“I got better at aiming I guess?” Jazz offered to give a hand to help up her half ghost brother. “I moved the Catcher to um, Catch you. I’m glad you didn’t smash into the metal siding, that would have hurt…” 

“Thanks, Jazz I owe ya one,” Phantom says with a nod. “Get anyone who’s not protected out of here!” And with that Phantom flew off to attack the Queen ant.

Valerie was quick to pick herself back up and tar off after Phantom. “This is a temporary truce I hope you know!” She calls as she catches her board and flies off after the ghost, though even as she said it lacked her usual vitreal. 

Thankfully once they were back in their own skin they made short work of the queen ant ghost, and even managed to not cause too much more property damage. 

As Danny caps the thermos, he side eyes the Red huntress next to him in the air and offers the teen a hesitant hand. “I’m not gonna ask you to forgive me again but… maybe hesitant colleagues?”

Red eyed the ghost before her, his hesitant but hopeful smile that didn’t quite hide the worry and fear behind his eyes struck her more than anything. She used to think he was simply good at mimicking emotions but now… having felt them being him, herself? Well… she supposed the saying is true that you really can’t understand someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. His emotions felt real, on both sides she could taste the ones he was putting through her body, She felt pain when she was slapped by him… And she was finally able to see him as just another teen that was in over his head…. Dog ruining her life or not, though looking back on it now she had to admit it was something she was thankful for in a way.

She would see Paulina and her A list brainless wonders and know she used to be one of them. Caring too much about the wrong things and ruled by money in a way… Now? She knew she had to work to get anywhere, people liked her for her, not just her status and well… She had a purpose she could be proud of now.

“Yeah, Colleagues sounds like a good start… But step even a toe outta line and I will smear your ectoplasmic innards all over town.” Valerie threatened though she was teasing Phantom still grimaced as she grasped his hand. “Eh, I think I’ll take that…” he replied somewhat nervously.

“Good. Also… Maybe since you have one, I should give you my cell number… Case you ever need more than just some inventions as a backup.” 

Phantom visibly brightened at that his glow got brighter and he grinned. “Yeah, that’d be perfect actually! Maybe we can trade off patrol routes and stuff too? Give each other a night off once in a while? I know you work so… ya know…?” 

Valerie snorted but she appreciated the gesture nonetheless. She looks around before pulling a random piece of paper from off of the ground and using some piece of charcoal from who knows what that exploded she managed to scribble down her number. 

Phantom bit his tongue as he almost told her he had her number already, or that if he needed it he could easily get it with Tucker’s help but that wouldn’t do him any good now. He made it this far without blowing his secret, he wasn’t about to blow it on something stupid like this! 

Though it did make him wonder why Valerie hadn’t changed back to Fanton at all accidentally. He sure as hell did constantly when he first started out, it was a nightmare and resulted in far more detentions than he would have liked… Well, maybe she just didn’t think it was a possibility? He didn’t want to think too hard on that right now honestly, it brought with it too many questions. 

He took the paper from the huntress when she offered it and nodded to her in thanks. “See ya around ghost brat.” She said, almost endearingly before speeding off, no doubt to sleep. 

Phantom watches her go a moment before heading off on his own way back towards where his friends were waiting for him. Oh they had angry looks didn’t they, fun… 

He had a hell of an experience to tell, and some things he wanted to get advice on… he hated being the embodiment of an existential crisis all the time, but hey, at least it was interesting right? 

He just hoped Val keeps her new attitude. He’d rather work with her than have to dodge her blasts all the time after all…. And a few nights off here and there sounded wonderful.

Only time will tell, he supposed. 

-.-.-.-.-.-.- Complete

Total word count: 8875

[whatsortofschoolisthis]

Name: Hecate Maran Ames

Gender: Female

Age: 16

Birth Date: October 31, 1972

Species: (Human, Lycanthrope, Metamorphmagus, Vampire, ect): Human

Blood Status: (Pureblood, Half-Blood, Muggleborn): Pureblood

Sexuality: Straight

Alignment: Chaotic Good

Ethnicity: English/Irish

Nationality: English

Residence: North Devon, England. Was born in County Kerry, Ireland and lived there until she was ten years old.

Myer Briggs Personality Type: ISFJ- The Defender

THE MAGE

1st Wand: Acacia Wood

A very unusual wand wood, which I have found creates tricky wands that often refuse to produce magic for any but their owner, and also withhold their best effects from all but those most gifted. This sensitivity renders them difficult to place, and I keep only a small stock for those witches or wizards of sufficient subtlety, for acacia is not suited to what is commonly known as ‘bangs-and-smells’ magic. When well-matched, an acacia wand matches any for power, though it is often underrated due to the peculiarity of its temperament.

2nd Wand: Silver Lime

The reasons for these wands’ desirability lay not only in their unusually handsome appearance, but also because they had a reputation for performing best for Seers and those skilled in Legilimency, mysterious arts both, which consequently gave the possessor of a silver lime wand considerable status. When demand was at its height, wandmaker Arturo Cephalopos claimed that the association between silver lime and clairvoyance was ‘a falsehood circulated by merchants like Gerbold Ollivander (my own grandfather), who have overstocked their workshops with silver lime and hope to shift their surplus’. But Cephalopos was a slipshod wandmaker and an ignoramus, and nobody, Seer or not, was surprised when he went out of business.

Animagus: Black and White cat.

Misc Magical Abilities: (Legilimen, Seer, Parselmouth, Obscurial, ect): Seer. Somehow linked with inherited Legilimens abilities but its not certain how or why.

Boggart Form:  

Pre-Hogwarts- 1st year: The Hidebehind.

2nd-4th year:The Dullahan. She saw him once before her grandad died.

5th year- onward: The Dullahan as Rakepick standing over her friends dead bodies

Riddikulus Form: The Hidebend turns into a monkey symbol toy. The Dullahan flees as her friends bodies turn into bars of gold.

Amortentia: (What do they smell like?) Pumpkins, Hot Chocolate, and the seaside.

Amortentia: (What do they smell?): Old books, Tea, and broom wood (Andre).

Patronus:  Dapple Grey Stallion.

Patronus Memory: Her older sisters taking her, Sean, Bryn, and Jacob to feed the ducks.

Mirror of Erised: Depends. As a child and 1-5th year its her family together again. Later its herself, secure in her relationships with those that love her and not needing the ones that don't.

Specialized/Favourite Spells:

Incendio: Hecate likes fire more than she should.

Bombarda: See above explanation.

Alhmohora: Hecate is like a cat. If a door is closed, she wants in.

APPEARANCE

Faceclaim:

Adult/Teen- Molly Quinn

Voiceclaim: Christen Mooney

Game Appearance:

Height: 4 ft 10

Weight: 94 pounds

Physique: Wiry build.

Eye Colour: Brown

Hair Colour: Copper Red

Skin Tone: Light

Body Modifications: Gets her ears pierced and that's it.

Scarring:

Long Thin Scar on her hand from devil's snare in her first year.

Claw scar on her shoulder from her duel with Chiara.

Scars on her arms from where the Giant  Spider grabbed her.

Deep ugly scars on the back of both her legs from the Horntail.

Inventory: (what do they carry on them?): Wiggenweld Potion, Epilambanein Potion (a potion meant to treat Seizures),  an Adder stone she got from her sister Fiadah, creature treats, and a photograph of her and her friends.

Fashion: Really loves robes. When she has to wear Muggle clothing its usually either boring and practical or overly girly.

ALLEGIANCES

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

Affiliations/Organizations: Circle of Khanna, Hogwarts, and her family

Professions:

-  Becomes a Quidditch Commentator alongside Murphy McNulty after graduation.

- Teaches Herbology after Retirement.

HOGWARTS INFORMATION

Class Proficiencies:  Flying, Charms, and Transfiguration.

Astronomy: T

Charms: E

DADA: AA

Flying: O

Herbology: E

History of Magic: P

Potions: A

Transfiguration: E

Electives:

Divination: T.

COMC: AA

Quidditch: Chaser alongside Skye Parkin. Later becomes a commentator alongside Murphy McNulty.

Extra Curricular: Quidditch, Sphinx Club, and Frog Choir

Favourite Professors:

Professor Flitwick: Hecate really looks up to and respects him. Cares a lot about his opinion, maybe even more than McGonagall's, and is afraid to let him down. One of three adults she trusts at Hogwarts.

Professor McGonagall: Respects and fears the woman, has never lied when asked a direct question. The second of three adults she trusts at Hogwarts.

Professor Kettleburn: The man is, without a doubt, barking mad but he is sincere in his love for animals and for teaching. Hecate respects that.

Professor Trelawney: Doesn’t like her much at first. However she does help Hecate learn to manage her seizures and understands how hard Seeing can be. She reminds Hecate of her Great-Grandma.

Least Favourite Professors:

Professor Binns: He's so boring. Hecate learned more from Rowan, The House Ghosts, and the entirety of Ravenclaw House than from Binns.

Professor Rakepick: Distrusts her instantly. Hecate only does what she says so she can keep an eye on the woman.

Relationships:

Brother: Jacob ‘Danny’ Ames.

Misc Siblings: Sean Ames (Twin), Rubin Orn, Wren Ames, and Fiadah O’Faud.

Father: Henry Ames

Mother: Saoirse Ames (Maiden Name: O’Malley)

Love Interest:

Murphy McNully: Dates briefly for a month before breaking it off- Mutual loss of interest. They stay friends.

Andre Egwu: They both admire each other mutually and become good friends. They go on TWO DATES but don’t really realize they’re in love until Duncan Ashe is forced to explain it them, much to his chagrin.

Best Friends:

Rowan Khanna

-Ben Copper

-Liz Tuttle: They knew each other before Hogwarts. Liz was Rubin’s neighbor and they used to play gobstones together through a gap in the fence and they would explore both of their gardens together. Became much closer over their mutual love of animals. 

-Skye Parkin: 

-Murphy McNully: 

-Bill Weasley and Orion Amari

-Charlie Weasley: 

-Tulip and Tonks

Rival:

Merula Snyde: Mostly at the Slytherin’s insistence. Hecate is over competing with her and just wants Merula to be better.

Diego Caplan: He will Not Leave Hecate Alone Ever. 

Enemy: Rakepick and R.

Dormmates: (Who’s in your MC’s dorm with them?):

Rowan Khanna/ Skye Parkin after Rowan's death.

Chiara Lobosca.

Tonks.

Pets: A tabby named Freddie, a Europeon Horned Owl name Persephone, and a crup named Pagur Ban.

Closest Canon Friends: Yes.

Closest MC Friends: Robbie Donavan @amerrymystery

PERSONALITY:

- Loves Animals. 

- Good at thinking on her feet but is generally bad at planning. Better in the moment.

- Stubborn and overly blunt.

- Good at putting herself in others shoes, even if she doesn’t like them.

- Gets frustrated with her physical inability very easily. 

- Is a bit of a smart aleck and is very sarcastic.

- Blames herself for everything that happens after the first vault is opened.

- Teaches herself new things all the time and learns by doing.

- A hard worker and tends to be a workaholic. Like so:

- Well aware of her limits. Can and will ignore them.

- Brave. Isn’t afraid of anyone or anything even when she should be.

MISC

- Is closest to her older sisters and Bryn

- Originally wanted to be a Herbologist (Since Magizoologist and Keeper for the Holyhead Harpies were both out of reach due to her epilepsy) but fell in love with Commentating. Decided to do Herbology after she either retired from commentating or got sick of it, whichever came first.

- Jacob calls her Pip or Mouth depending on his mood. Fiadah calls her half pint. Rubin and Wren call her Redbird. 

- Wasn’t allowed to have her own pet growing up. Her Grandma (who lived with them up until her death in Hecate’s Seventh Year) had a pet spider named Shelob that HATED children and would often terrorize Danny, Sean, and Hecate.

- Adopted as many pets as she could when she got to Hogwarts, because her mother made the mistake of telling her she could have as many animals as she wanted once she got to school.

- Hecate’s great-grandmother invented the Epilambanein Potion specifically for the Ames family, as seizures after waking visions had been quite common for centuries.

- Hecate’s waking visions are terrifying and usually end in an epileptic  fit. Additionally, she often has nightmares. Fortunately, those do not end in a seizure.

- Pangur Ban can sense when Hecate is about to seize/have a vision and alerts her so she can take the potion.

- Joined Frog Choir because she thought there would be frogs. Merula teases her about it mercilessly.

Credit for the profile goes to @hogwartsmysterystory​

[nodesiretogrowup]

LET’S GET READY TO RE-CAAAAAAAAP

“I have numerous science-based questions” I mean, same. It also sets up that Huey is gonna be out of his element this episode

SCROOGE HAS NO TIME FOR SCIENCE

“I AM THAT CHAMPION.” A bit full of yourself there. I couldn’t hear this line without saying “I’M. THAT. HERO.” Oh VeggieTales, you’ll always be with me

THEY ALL LOOK SO ADORABLE!!

I like that Louie does a finger gun when Scrooge gets to him

Like I said earlier, I DO NOT care Scrooge already putting pressure on these kids

Poor Dewey seems like he’s the unfavorite, which is probably how Donald felt as well

Huey makes a good point and I do NOT like how dismissive Scrooge is of the twins

That being said...they totally killed someone in battle

SOMEDAY WE’LL FIND IT, THE RAINBOW CONNECTION!

Why didn’t Launchpad crash? I know he can land w/o crashing but it’s usually when he lands in water. THIS FEELS IMPORTANT SOMEHOW though it probably isn’t

“THEY FOUND A WAY TO MAKE RAINBOWS BETTER!” God, I love Webby

“This is the best day.” WEBBY, YOU ARE REACHING CRITICAL LEVELS OF ADORABLE

Birds with beards look odd

“Yeah, sure. Of course.” Poor Huey, magic and mythology aren’t his strong point

I love that it says Odin’s Closet over the shirts. It’s the little details

“Guess Louie knows what Louie’s doing today.” And then he disappears into the shirts. I can appreciate someone who knows what they’re about

I want ALL the shirts from this episode!

“WHOA, IT’S WRESTLING!” He looks so dang happy, it’s ADORABLE

“THIS IS AWESOME!” Chanting is fun

“So these guys just copied professional wrestling?” Huey, you’re form of logic is not welcome here

Does that mean Scrooge told someone about his battles and inspired them to create pro wrestling? I’m gonna go with that

“And they will love me for it!” Dewey, sweetie, that’s only how it works half the time

I loved all the man-snake stuff. Made me giggle

Man snake be THICC. HOT DAMN

I love the little pig ref. HE’S SO CUTE

Jormungandr knows how to pump up a crowd

So, like, is everyone in the audience technically DEAD?! That makes this episode slightly darker. I dig it

 I wonder if Jormungandr sees Earth’s destruction as a good thing for Earth. Like if he genuinely thinks they’d be better off in Valhalla. Or if he’s just a bastard who wants to watch the world burn

Scrooge is a bit too into playing the heel

The way Scrooge moves and the faces he makes as the Millionaire Miser remind me of Glomgold

“I watch a lot of wrestling while I fly.” “Wait, while?” This exchange always cracks me up

“Uncle Scrooge is the greatest hero of all time.” “Huh, I guess not everyone thinks so.” I feel like this is foreshadowing later events

RIP Announcer Puffin

“DIBS ON ANNOUNCING!” A dude just got KO’d bro! Have a bit of respect

And the return of the dynamic sports announcer duo. Glad Huey got his badge

I NEED MORE WRESTLING ANNOUNCER LP

Strongbeard is DOPE

“How did you know that?” “Just calling it like I see it. WRESTLING!” The real reason Launchpad knows is because he’s actually Thor but doesn’t remember. I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

FEAR THE BEARD

“What matters is I’m doing the right thing.” I don’t know, you really seem to enjoy being a heel

This whole match is great

Dewey, there ARE NO RULES IN WRESTLING. Plus you aren’t the ref, so you can’t make that call

I have very inappropriate jokes go through my head when only one arm absorbs the beard energy

“I am so confused.” CONSTANT MOOD

DID SCROOGE NARUTO RUN AT STRONGBEARD?!

I like that Scrooge dives onto him the same way he dives into his bin

LP is so excited he pushes Huey out of the way for NO REASON

HOLY FUCK THAT DUDE THREW A CHAIR AT A CHILD!

All the bone cracking in this episode made me uncomfortable, as in my bones hurt during it

“He is such a good guy.” I’d say he’s a fair guy, not necessarily a good guy

“Which two of you will fight for me?” Webby has been waiting for this moment her WHOLE LIFE

Louie, always taking time to make that money

Who gave him a shirt cannon?!

I love that the dude comes up wearing the shirt

Dewey just slaps Scrooge in the face

Champ POPular! Too cute! I love his hair and outfit. Though I don’t think Champ POPular’s “too popular to hate.” If anything he might annoy people due to his popularity

I thought he was gonna pull out yo-yos as his “finishing touch” and I was sad when it was lollipops even though that makes more sense. BRING BACK THE YO-YOS!

“Do all the fighting and make sure he doesn’t die.” That is a valid concern

WE WILL WE WILL ROCK YOU! I’D KNOW IT ANYWHERE

Huey taking notes is adorable

“Just in time for the tag-team round.” “Wait, they’re playing tag now?! MAN!” I love how Danny says MAN

How does Huey not know what a tag-team is? It’s a pretty common term

I love Launchpad’s reading face

Dewey has red, blue, and green lollipops. Cute

“HE’S THROWING LOLLIPOPS BECAUSE HE THINKS WE’RE SUCKERS!” That took me off guard and I laughed so hard

“I’ve known you my whole life, I kinda knew how this would play out.” Louie is genre savvy. Perhaps too savvy. He’s gonna figure out he’s in a tv show

“More like Champ POP..ulation zero because he has no friends...in Friendtown.” I fail to see how that was any worse than LP’s “more like Champ UN-POPular.”

“WE HATE YOU NOW!” Tough crowd

Huey’s face after that. I just want to pinch his lil cheeks

WEBBY DON’T NEED NO WRESTLER NAME

It TOTALLY went over my head that they censored Hela with Hecka (at least they used her better than the MCU did. WE COULD HAVE HAD SO MUCH BETTER)

I would let her pin me to the mat and crush my skull in

“Oh, COME ON, THIS is what you like?! A creepy goth and her pet dog!” SHUT UP, DEWEY, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT! I’m surprised Webby didn’t slap him for the “creepy goth” comment seeing as Lena is goth and misunderstood

“HECKA YEAH! HECKA YEAH!” SHE’S SO COOL AND SEXY AND SHE HAS A DOG

Poor Huey, he’s doing his best. Hope he takes a shower later because he got pretty sweaty

HECKA COULD STEP ON ME AND I’D SAY THANK YOU

Why did Huey have all those corn puns?

“YOU’RE THE WORST! YOU’RE THE WORST!” It’s just not Huey’s day

“You don’t have to try to make it sound great, it already is.” Did this remind anyone else of Dewey’s “don’t overthink it” advice to Launchpad from Double-O Duck? He’s doing his best to help Huey

I WANT HECKA TO DESTROY ME

“EMBRACE THE BOOZE BOOS.”

Poor Dewey

WEBBY IS A BEAST! SHE WAS BORN FOR THIS!

“EMBRACE YOUR INNER HEEL!” Cuz being a heel is fun!

DUDE, WEBBY TOOK DOWN THE GODDESS OF DEATH WITH NOTHING BUT HER LEGS AND THIGHS! WE STAN!

I like that Fenny has knee pads on

“AW, YOU’RE SO DANGEROUS AND CUTE! I JUST WANT TO PET YOUR LITTLE BELLY!” WEBBY IS ME

“A classic ‘who’s a good boy?’ gambit!” AND I’D FALL FOR IT TOO! SUCH A GOOD BOI

“Wait, am I the Launchpad here?” Bitch, you WISH

“YOU CAN’T GIVE CANDY TO A DOG!” This is why you don’t have a pet, Dewey

“WHOA, back from THE DEAD for the QUEEN of the DEAD!”

Kind of a dick move, Louie

AIR GUITAR!

Jormungandr looks like a Masters of the Universe knock-off toy

WHO’S A GOOD BOI? YOU ARE!

“With a toxic personality” I think you’re projecting a bit, Jormungandr 

How does Huey not know what a battle royale is? That is a very common term! Hell, there is a well known book and movie with that title!

“I’m just a humble, noble snake man of the people.” Why does the term snake man make me laugh so much?  

WOY REFERENCE FTW

Dewey needs a hug! And some therapy would probably be a good idea

Scrooge’s speech started on a good note then went downhill FAST

“And lastly, I’ll use the dust of your bones as sweetener in my tea.” DAMN

“TOO FAR!” I DON’T THINK IT’S FAR ENOUGH! TELL HIM HOW YOU WILL BATHE IN HIS BLOOD

FUCK YEAH BEAKLEY!

SHE GAVE HIM THE CHAIR! I think this CONFIRMS Beakley as a wrestling fan

“I know we’re supposed to take over for Scrooge one day, but do you ever wonder if maybe we’re not cut out for it?” YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WONDER THOSE THINGS AT ALL! 

Louie’s like WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT!

“Be LP” My new mantra

Aw, Louie sees Dewey as a hero. Like how LP saw Drake as a hero. I think @drakepad is onto something, this scene and the fight scene seem WAAAAY too much like Drake’s intro to be just a coincidence

I keep saying this, but Louie should consider a career in motivational speaking. He knows what people need to hear

“Let’s do this!” “I don’t know.” “Let’s Dewey this?” “I’m in.”

“I’LL SHED YOUR SKIN FOR YOU!” If he hadn’t of had an old man back moment that would have been a BRUTAL CUT

OMG WAS LAUNCHPAD WEARING THAT THE WHOLE TIME? You see his clothes fly off when he jumps in the ring

“Whoa. In a COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED TWIST, the announcer was Captain Crash THIS WHOLE TIME!” LP does underground wrestling matches in his spare time, TELL ME I’M WRONG

“YOUR CATCHPHRASES ARE FORCED!” I agree, Dewey could have done WAY BETTER

I like Louie just GLARING at the dude who insulted Dewey’s catchphrase

LP looks so proud of Huey

“I don’t care at all, why should I?” Methinks the snake man doth protest too much

I like how Jormungandr’s pupils are thinner during the climax. It shows off his true nature

Dewey should have been the one to do a spin attack, ya know, cuz he’s Sonic? I’ll go now

“The Pop never Stops.” That was better

WHERE ARE ALL THESE CHAIRS COMING FROM?!

I LEGIT thought Strongbeard was gonna throw Dewey his axe and I was like Dewey wouldn’t be able to lift that

SUPER SAIYAN DEWEY! Also was that a TIGER SNARL?

I like the ice pack on Launchpad’s head. Just because he can take a lot of damage doesn’t mean that LP is immune to pain

I like that the crowd CHANGED THEIR BANNERS! Nice

LOUIE AND WEBBY LOOKED SO CUTE!

LP tearing up

“A true people’s hero” I feel like that phrase will come back in relation to other characters (cough DW cough)

Scrooge is such a little shit, it’s kind of adorable

THAT END SHOT! THAT SONG!

This was a SUPER FUN EPISODE! I couldn’t really tell where they were going and I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT! I wish we had gotten Huey in some wrestling gear but maybe next time. I like the message that doing the right thing isn’t always popular but I kind of feel like Dewey getting the crowd on his side muddled the message somewhat. Poor Dewey needs therapy or something so he doesn’t feel like he needs CONSTANT approval. Again, he’s 11 YEARS OLD and shouldn’t be put into such a serious position. LP was VIP this episode. I’m bummed we’re on hiatus again, but WHAT an episode to end on!

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

The Champagne Room Part 6

Warnings: dirty talk, salty!Seokjin, making out, some over the clothes stuff, no hard smut yet because this is a s l o w b u r n

Word Count: 1518

You leave in the morning before he wakes up, and then you don't see him for a couple of weeks.

Actually, he sees you before you see him, but you have no idea.

You're feeling weird about this whole thing and particularly about how nice it felt to be held all night with strong arms around you.

A couple of weeks after, you end up having a few drinks at the club before the end of your shift and it's Jungkook who slides on the barstool next to you.

"You gonna need a ride home, beautiful?" He murmurs into your ear, and you jump a little.

"Who says I wanna go home?" You tease, and his brown eyes widen a little.

Oh. He's cute. You haven't noticed how cute he is until now, maybe distracted, maybe worried about getting close to coworkers.

He'd look almost innocent, really, if it weren't for the sharp line of his jaw and wide shoulders. He's young, but not too young, and you wonder if it's the booze that's making you look at him in a whole different light.

He flushes a little, but gives you a smirk anyway. "Well, I could take you home with me."

His voice is soft and low and you shiver a little before laughing.

"Why don't you buy me a drink first, yeah?"

After two more drinks and a little conversation, you find yourself in the break room since he's on until close, pinned up against the wall by his body.

He's bigger than you thought, more muscular, and you're spreading your hands across the expanse of his chest and he's breathing hard against your ear.

"My shift is over in twenty minutes," he breathes into your ear, shifting a thigh between your legs.

You're still in a slinky lace dress, purple this time, a violet that reflects the reddish lights in the club just the right way.

"What if I can't wait twenty minutes?" You say, only half drunk on vodka cranberries, half drunk on the smell of his skin.

He groans shakily against your ear. "Don't say that. You'll get us both fired."

You laugh a little at that and he pulls back to look in your eyes, his own big and chocolate brown and a little glassy.

"You're so pretty," he says, and kisses just below your collarbone.

That's when you remember a different voice, that word, "pretty," sparking the memory of the last time a man had said that to you.

But that wasn't business, right? Seokjin hadn't bothered to call or text after the morning you'd snuck out of his apartment, and he hadn't come to see you at the club, and he'd paid you after all, and why were you even thinking of him when you had this big, handsome man with a thigh between your legs and his mouth on your throat?

"Y/n," Jungkook says, softly, and you're grateful because then it's him you're thinking of again, his mouth on yours, his hands sliding around your waist.

Then you hear your friend and coworker, Maddie, clearing her throat repeatedly.

You groan and turn around. "Maddie.... it's not a good time," you hiss.

She raises a groomed eyebrow. "I can see that. But you got a private dance. Special request."

"Tell them I'm busy," you say, turning back to a flushed face Jungkook.

"It's one of your regulars, and Danny is on the warpath about us taking off early since it's been so slow."

You turn to Jungkook. "They won't want more than five songs. I'll be back before your shift is over."

Jungkook nods, blowing his hair out of his face, and you take off toward the private room, shutting the door behind you.

You shake your head a bit and then turn your eyes to the glass, but your teasing greeting catches in your throat.

It's him. It's Seokjin, in a rumpled white button up and black slacks, no tie, a tumbler of brown liquor and ice in his hand.

His eyes are piercing, face serious. "Long time no see, pretty," he murmurs, taking a long sip.

"Hello," you say dumbly, and as the music starts you move your hands to your bra straps.

Seokjin shakes his head. "Not yet."

Your hands stutter. "What... what do you want, then?"

His lips curl in a bitter smile. "Aw, pretty, that's the million dollar question, yeah?"

You're concerned, suddenly, taking a step toward the glass. "What's wrong, Jinnie?"

He draws in a breath that hitches in his chest, eyes searching your face to land on your throat.

Your hand goes to where his gaze is instantly, and you aren't sure why.

"Thought you said he was just a friend."

You swallow, hard. "Who?"

Seokjin chuckles and it sounds bitter. He finishes his drink and you can see that his eyes are a little glassy.

"I wasn't spying," he says when you maintain eye contact, looking down at his empty glass. "I was just looking for you, and your friend pointed me toward the break room. I didn't even walk in, just saw him all over you and went to the bar."

You can't help but laugh a little. "So you bought a private dance because you're territorial?"

"No," he insists stubbornly, looking up at you. "I was going to buy one anyway. I...I wanted to see you."

You give him a slow smirk, leaning forward a bit, pressing your breasts together to reveal your cleavage. "Did you miss me, Jinnie?"

His tongue darts out to wet his lips, and he nods hesitantly.

It's nearing the third song, and you're still wearing your lace bra and panties.

You toy with the strap of your panties, calling forth all your flirty skills. "We're running out of time, handsome. Don't you want to see more?"

Seokjin shakes his head. "I bought fifteen songs."

"You did what?" You screech. "Kim Seokjin, I've been on my feet for six hours in these heels and I had plans-"

He sits up straight, leaning forward, squaring his shoulders a bit.

"Plans with that kid? Doesn't he bore you a little, pretty? You'd probably have to teach him how to get you off. You need a man, not a boy."

You roll your eyes. "A man like you?"

Seokjin smirks. "Maybe."

"So you dropped three hundred dollars just to be territorial about Jungkook?"

He flushes a little. "Technically, four hundred. I slipped your friend a bill to interrupt you."

You can't help laughing. "I've never had someone spend that much money just to be salty."

"I'm not...fine. I am salty," he admits, looking up at your face.

"You don't say," you drawl dryly.

"I want to take you home," he says bluntly.

"I'm not a prostitute, Seokjin."

"I know that!" He huffs out a breath, brushing his hair back from his face in frustration. "I didn't mean...I wouldn't pay you."

You snort a little. "And what makes you think I'd go home with you? I don't fuck clients."

"But you want to fuck me," he says, matter-of-fact.

"Do I?''

He nods again. "It makes you so hot, how I talk to you in here, doesn't it? You love it when I call you pretty, when I call your cunt pretty. It makes you wet, yeah? I bet you're dripping right now. Show me."

Your breath gets suddenly shorter, skin feeling hot. You obey without thinking, untying one side of your panties and letting them drop, hanging on one ankle until you kick them off.

Seokjin licks his lips again, learning farther forward.

"Turn around and spread for me, diamond. Let's see that pretty pussy. I want to see how it glistens."

You let out a whimper as pivot and bend over a bit, spreading your legs and your labia, using your fingers in a "V."

You can hear him groan and he's right, you're dripping.

"Let me take you home, pretty. Let me show you what I can do, yeah?"

"I remember," you moan, thinking of those full lips around your clit.

"I want to be inside you, buried to the hilt inside that pretty cunt." He's panting and you turn around to face him, wanting to see, but that's when the lights go down, the manager getting ready to close.

You bolt out of the room but he's coming out the other side, slacks unbuttoned.

You freeze, breathing hard, and he grabs you around the waist and pulls you to him, ducking his head to kiss you, tasting of whiskey, tongue slipping into your mouth.

You're breathless as he breaks apart. "Come home with me, pretty," he says, voice almost hoarse, cupping your chin in his hand. "I promise you won't regret it."

You want to blame your thudding heart on the alcohol, on the way you've been on your feet for hours, but you know it's the hungry look in his eyes, the way his hands rest on your lower back, thumb caressing your skin.

You swallow hard before you nod, and the way his eyes light up makes your heart flip over in your chest.

[julia-highstorms]

Tom x Julia - NSFW ALPHABET

A/N: For this NSFW ABC, I decided doing things a bit differently… Tom and Julia themselves will be answering it!

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Pixelberry Studios.

Rating: +18 (NSFW. If you'd like to not be tagged on this type of content, tell me! If you'd like to be tagged on my Tom x F!MC fanfics, tell me!)

Word count: +2,500

Interviewer: Hello, and thanks for agreeing on answering this… uh, quiz. It’s a very intimate and explicit interview, so if you two could go on details, the better.

Tom: How intimate?! What do you mean explicit?! Julia, to what did you drag me onto?!

Julia: Thanks for having us! And relax, Tom, it’ll be fun! Okay, let’s do this! What’s the name of the quiz again?

I (with a smirk): "NSFW Alphabet"

*Tom immediately blushes*

T (murmuring): Oh my god, I’m having a bad feeling about this…

I: Alright, let’s begin: A = Aftercare. What are you like after sex? What do you do after steamy time? Fall asleep? Pillowtalk? Go for another round?

J: We just cuddle and talk. We're not the type to fall asleep, so we usually go grab something to eat…

T: Yeah, all that exercise always leaves me starving.

I: Oh, and what do you usually eat?

T and J (in unison): Pancakes

J: We make them together. It's a cool pastime, you know? Cooking together. You know a lot about the other person… Like, how messy Tom is in the kitchen.

T: In my defense, that bag of flour was already open! When we're too lazy we just order pizza, though.

I: Next letter… B = Body part. What's your favourite part of your partner’s body?

*Julia and Tom share a look, their eyes roaming each other's body and they both blush at the same time*

T: You go first. You're the one who brought us here.

J (rolls her eyes, avoiding making eye contact with Tom): It's weird. You'll find it stupid.

I: We won't. Take your time.

*Julia takes a deep breath and starts speaking again*

J: It might sound a bit weird, but--

T: Oh my God, is that my di--

J: No! I mean, I like it too, but… uh, it's not that thing! I mean, it's not my favorite thing! *Julia's cheeks turn pinker and pinker as she gets more tongue tied. Tom looks confused and the interviewer has to bite back a laugh* Uh, I really like this little tummy that shows up when you sit. *she confesses in a really, really low voice*

T: What?! Tummy?

J: Y-yeah… I actually am not a fan of ripped off bodies. They don't look natural to me. And that little tummy is… adorable.

T: Then maybe I should start drinking more beer. Because I got this tummy definitely from beer.

J: Absolutely not. You're insufferable when you're drunk.

I: What happens when you get drunk?

J: He starts telling these stupid jokes, but can't finish them because he's already laughing at it. And he laughs at literally anything. And he got this really loud laughter.

T: Hey, those jokes are gold! And you just turn into this killing machine when you're drunk! *Tom turns to the interviewer* Last time we went to a karaoke we got kicked out of there because she started picking up on fights with everybody!

J: Of course, no one knew how to sing decently there!

I: What about you, Tom? What is your favorite part of your girlfriend's body?

*Both the interviewer and Julia look at him expectantly, while his face flushes slightly*

T: I… really like her hips.

J: You mean my butt.

T: No! It really is your hips! They're... soft.

J: Ah, this is why you're always literally grabbing them! And looking at my butt! You perv--

T: Uh, what's the next question? *he takes a sip on the bottle of water that the interviewer offered to them before*

I: C = Cum. *Tom almost chokes on his water* Anything related to it.

T: Uh, what do you want to know about it? It happens, yeah. I make her cum and she makes me cum. This is what is supposed to happen, right? Isn't it?

J: Breathe, Tom.

*He takes a deep breath, trying to compose himself. Julia chuckles softly*

J: Yeah, we love making each other cum. Tom won't admit it out loud, but he loses his mind when I swallow it.

T: Oh my god, Julia…

J: I can see it on your face, babe.

I: Onto next letter… oh, this one is nice! D = Dirty Secret. What is a dirty secret of yours?

T: Uh… our first time was in a photo booth. And I got pictures of when Julia almost literally attacked me.

J: Shut up, you got into it very fast. And Tom is the biggest softie™ ever, but he might go rough… if I ask nicely. Right, Tom? *she smirks at him, trailing a finger down his arm, seductively and he has to shuffle away from her. Julia laughs*

I: Oh, how rough?

J: Hm, I guess I still have some marks here… *attempts to lift her t-shirt up, but Tom interrupts her*

T (with his face bright red): What's our next letter?! E?!

I: Exactly, E = Experience. How experienced are you? Do you know what they’re doing?

T: I've had like zero experience before Julia. She taught me everything I know.

J: And Tom's a fast and very eager learner. *she bumps her shoulder playfully on his and he ducks his head, a shy grin on his lips* I've had a few previous relationships, but Tom definitely is my first love and serious partner. But I thought you had a girlfriend in high school?

T: I had a girlfriend during sophomore year for three weeks, until I got fed up of her calling me 'senpai' all the time. I had some crushes after it, but they never developed to something more, until I met you.

J: Aww… I love you, Tomoichi Sato.

T: I love you too, Julia Vance.

I (smiling at them): This is all very sweet, but shall we continue on our interview? F = Favourite Position. I guess no further explanation is needed.

T: We never talked about it before, but… I love when she rides me... And when she takes control.

J (pretends to be shocked): Gasp! Oh, really?

T (shoves her from her chair, making her laugh loudly): Jerk!

J: Yeah, I'm pretty sure everyone knows who's the sub in this relationship. *chuckles* I like when you get behind me, Tom...

T (genuinely surprised): For real? *Julia nods, smiling sheepishly*

J: I don't know, it's so exciting to me. Because in a sense I don't know what, or more specifically, when it'll happen, you know? Since I can't see your face. Does it make sense? It doesn't matter if we're standing or lying down; that's the position that gives me more pleasure.

I: Woo, are you feeling the air getting hot and bothered in here? I certainly am. Alright, next one: G = Goofy. Are you more serious on the moment or more humorous?

J: If we aren't being goofy, then you bet something’s wrong.

I: Yeah, I can feel it. H = Hair. How well groomed are you?

J: I keep it trimmed.

T: Same. None just feels… unnatural? I don't know.

I: Okay, what about I = Intimacy? How are you during the moment? We're talking on the romantic aspect.

T: To be honest, intimacy is everything. Without it, we can't be ourselves with one another. I've never felt as connected to someone as I feel with Julia.

J: Yeah, and sex definitely helps bringing us even more closer.

T: Having sex without intimacy is just a weird concept to me.

I: J = Jack Off. Anything about masturbation.

T: Hmm… I confess I started masturbating a whole lot more after meeting her. Especially when we're apart because we almost literally live on the other side of the country from each other. And the longing sometimes is just too much.

J: We might even do some… hmm… very explicit video calls sometimes… Right, Tom?

T: Yeah, I always have to lock my door, because Andy has no sense of privacy and enters my room whenever he wants, usually to borrow a game. *Julia bursts out in laughter*

J: And when we’re finally together, we both love stimulating and pleasing each other.

T: Yeah, Julia has this really cute face when she is close to come.

I: Ooh… K = Kink. Any kink, you two?

T: Is dirty talking a kink?

J: C'mon Tom, we both know you like a light BSDM.

*Tom blushes furiously*

T: Nothing too rough, though! I can't stand pain.

J: Yeah, you're a big baby.

T: Julia loves getting it on in public spaces.

J: And you never can say no.

I (chuckling softly): Okay, L = Location. Got any favourite places to do the do?

T: I'll be honest, nothing is better than doing it on a comfortable surface like a bed or a couch.

J: Taking a shower together is nice too and saves water!

I: That's true. Now, tell me about M = Motivation. What turns you on? What gets you going?

J: I lose my mind whenever Tom gets this frown, like when he's playing a particular tough level or when beating monsters. That night when you showed up with that baseball bat and killed those lake monsters, I swear, I almost took my clothes off right there. I just didn't because Parker and Danni were there too.

T (laughing): Oh yeah, I can get pretty sexy when fighting for our lives. I guess my biggest motivator (and indicator that I'm doing something right) is when Julia calls my name while… I don't know, just her can make me feel this way when she says it.

J: Like this, Tom…? *she purrs into his ear before pecking on his neck and the boy's face turns red immediately* And if you want to turn Tomoichi Sato on, just kiss his neck. That is his most sensitive area.

I: What about turn offs? Something you wouldn't do? A N = NO?

J: I am completely against mixing food with sex. That would be so anti hygienic. Hell no.

T: The idea of inflicting pain is just awful to me.

I: O = Oral. Who prefers giving? And receiving? Who got better skills?

T: I'm much more a giver than Julia.

J: Because you're so eager to please me. And I ain't rejecting if you want to give. Of course I prefer receiving. Tom's skills are on point. He knows exactly what to do and how I like it. I taught him right. *she winks*

I: Interesting, very interesting… How's your P = Pace? Are you fast and rough? Or more slow and sensual?

T: I guess it depends on our mood, what we feel like doing in the moment. We like experimenting, learning what each other enjoys more.

J: We usually start slow and picks up speed from there.

I: What are your opinions on Q = Quickies rather than proper sex? How often do you do it?

J: Quickies are great to release some stress and when we just can’t hold back anymore, but don’t have enough time (which can happen pretty often).

T: ...Though proper sex is unbeatable.

I: And do you take R = Risks?

T: I mean, we've done it in public spaces with people around more than I'd like to admit.

J: But we always use protection. I make sure he wears a condom. I ain't taking that risk.

I: Alright, we're finishing it, guys! Just hang in there a bit more. Tell me about your S = Stamina. How many rounds can they go for, how long do you last, etc.

*They share a look*

T: I don't know, I would say we're average?

J: Sometimes we can go for 2 to 3 rounds… And we last just enough to usually come together (sometimes he lasts longer, sometimes I last longer…) and that is fantastic.

I: T = Toy. Do you own any toys? If yes, do you use them? On each other or on yourself?

J: My best friend thought it would be hilarious giving me a fucking dildo a few years ago. *Julia rolls her eyes annoyedly* I had to keep it safe so my parents or Elliot wouldn't find it. Though I confess it became rather useful after I met Tom and, you know, we started this long distance relationship thing. We use it only on me, because I don't think it's safe or hygienic to use this type of stuff on more than one person.

T: We use some ties sometimes. It's nice.

J: 'It's nice'. Oh my god, look at your face! *bursts in giggles*

I: U = Unfair. How much you like to tease.

T: Jeez, Julia is so unfair! She likes sitting on my lap when I'm playing, or grinding on me and… Yeah, you got the picture. She's teasing me literally all the time.

J: Well, I can't help it if you make me horny! Just by standing there! Looking adorable and sexy all the time!

I: Let's talk about V = Volume. How loud you are? What sounds do you make?

*Tom giggles*

T: Julia can get… very loud. Like, very. It's good though, because I know I'm doing it right.

J (with her cheeks flushed): Good for you and your ego, because, uh, poor Andy. I bet that other time he heard me.

T: Who wouldn't?

*He avoids a punch from hers*

J: Anyway, yeah, I definitely am the loudest. Though Tom makes all these whimpers and moans.

T: Which turn you on even more.

J: Yeah, they're so cute and, uh, sexy.

I: This is the second time you call him cute and sexy.

J: I mean, haven't you seen him?! *she points to her boyfriend, who chuckles*

T: Thanks for being my number #1 fan, Julia. It's reciprocated. *he kisses her forehead and she rests her head on his shoulder, sighing contently*

I: Okay, W = Wild Card. You can tell me anything. Something you never told each other. Is there something you'd like to try? Anything.

*Tom ducks his head, a bit embarrassed*

J: What?

T: You know… Since you usually wear more loose clothes, the first time I saw you completely naked, I was... surprised to know that you actually have breasts.

*Julia bursts out in laughter*

J: Oh, this is why you kept staring at and touching my breasts with so much interest! I'm loving this interview, so many revelations!

I: Since we're talking about sizes… X = X-ray. Tell us what's going on behind all these clothes!

T: Uh… I'm average? Nothing special in here.

J: Well, since we're already talking about my breasts, I wear 32C.

I: Y = Yearning. How high is your sex drive?

T: I'd say average again? It depends on the day and on our mood.

J: Yes, sometimes we’ll want to bang until we both pass out. *chuckles* There are days that we just want to cuddle and watch some TV. Though I can say for sure it got a bit higher since we started dating.

I: Alright, final letter! Z = Zzz. How quickly do you fall asleep after sex?

T: We actually don’t usually fall asleep afterwards. Although I feel physically tired, my mind is wide awake.

J: Me too. Like we said in the beginning of this interview, we end up talking. Or grabbing something to eat!

Tagging: @littlecrookedheart @pixelburied @mysticgayralsei @breaumonts @abbiebishops @madhattterusagi @noahpologiste @samira-yazdi @mysteli @indiacater @indescribablechoices @emomoustache @choices-fanatic @edgydepressedchoicesthot @violarobics @withoutanyconfidence @tiz-rex @priya-trash @alicegma @thequeenchoices

[victorluvsalice]

Valice Shipping Week, Day 3: Blue

Over to one of those AU ideas I have which goes dormant for long periods, and then randomly pops up again whenever I think of the movie it’s related to -- Wonderland Fuzz! The Hot Fuzz AU with Alice as Nick and Victor as Danny. I decided to do this verse for this prompt because, while pondering possible ideas, I remembered the phrase “boys in blue” to refer to cops, and while that may not be strictly true of the UK police service. . .well, it was enough to remind me of the AU. I’ve always wanted to do more fic for it! This starts right after the famous “shortest car chase ever” sequence, where Alice has just intimidated Bruno Carpenter into apologizing for speeding. Victor and Alice return to their car, and Alice decides to give Victor a bit of on-the-job advice. . .

"See what I did there?"

Judging by the expression on Victor's face, he saw nothing more nor less than the Goddess of Law Enforcement sitting next to him. It was equal parts annoying and – though she would never, ever admit it to him – gratifying. "You hypnotized him," he breathed, tone utterly adoring.

Alice shook her head. When was he going to realize that her talents as an officer weren't the result of some innate magic only she had? Ah well, time for another round of "training you ought to have received except nobody in this village seems to care how proper police procedure works." "No, I used this," she said, pulling out her trusty notebook and waggling it in his face. Victor obligingly turned his puppy-dog stare on it. "This is the most important piece of equipment you will ever own," she continued forcefully. "This notebook has saved my skin more times than I care to mention." Especially from administrators who'd seen the notes on her official police profile and started wondering about her field worthiness. . . She pushed that aside and frowned significantly at the pad squirreled in Victor's pocket. "And you should think about using yours more often."

"I do use mine," Victor promptly said, nodding like he was eager for a treat.

Alice raised a suspicious eyebrow. "Really? Show me."

The delighted look vanished as Victor went pink. One hand worked its way to his tie. "Uh – um – w-well. . ."

Alice sighed. Figured. Anything to score points with the big-city cop. "If we're going to work together, you can't lie to me."

"I'm not – I – i-it's just–" Victor ducked his head, gnawing on his lower lip. "You – you p-promise not to make fun?"

All right, that was unexpected. What was in this notebook of his? "I promise," Alice said, hand over her heart.

Victor took a deep breath, then – with clear reluctance – pulled out his notebook and handed it over. Alice flipped it open, prepared to take just a quick glance before giving him a lecture on using police property for its correct purpose –

Only for the words to die on her lips. She gaped, astonished. As she'd suspected, there were no actual notes in the notebook. Instead, Victor had filled it with – butterflies. Dozens of them. Beautiful, lifelike, precise sketches of every species in the English countryside. "Victor. . ."

Victor hunched up, grimacing. "I know," he mumbled into his collar. "I know, I shouldn't – I just l-like them, okay? Have ever since I was a kid."

"So do I," Alice replied absently, turning the pages. Victor hadn't stopped with simple drawings of the full creature, either – there were also careful diagrams of legs and wings and heads, almost like he was practicing for illustrating a biology textbook. Annotations ran off into the margins, detailing interesting facts or quirks he'd noticed about each species. And here's me, thinking he cares about nothing but action movies! Why they tell us never to judge from the surface. . . "These are lovely – I mean, you shouldn't be doing this in your work notebook," she hastily added. "This should solely be for case notes – but they are beautiful."

Victor's head jerked up, eyes wide with surprise. "What – you – you t-think so? I d-do know that I shouldn't use it like that, just, u-usually, when I'm in the field, I'm – literally out in a field, and there's n-not a lot to do, and I don't have my actual sketchbook. . .you really like them?"

"I do," Alice confirmed. She knew she should be emphasizing the whole "but you should draw them on your own time" angle, but. . .damn it, these were too amazing to condemn. "I've never met a lepidopterist in person before."

If Victor's eyes got any wider, they were going to fall right out of his head. "You – know the word? Nobody else in the station ever bothered. . ." He swallowed. "Emily and Victoria have always been nice about it, but I'm p-pretty sure Father doesn't approve. A-and the – the Andys. . ."

The look on his face said it all. "Don't get along with most of your coworkers?" Alice asked quietly. God, she knew about that all too well.

"L-like I said, Emily and Victoria are nice. . .b-but there was this – incident in Year 12, where I was dating both of them at once for a bit t-thanks to a misunderstanding, and it still – it still makes things a-awkward, sometimes," Victor confessed, rubbing the back of his head. "The rest of them, especially Hare and Mouse. . ." He sighed, staring at his shoes. "You know how, the night we first met, I was drunker than a s-skunk? That was them. Letting them drag me to the bar and get me plastered is – better than some of the o-other things they've done."

Righteous, protective anger flared up inside Alice. As if she didn't have enough reasons to dislike the branch of the service she'd been saddled with. "And you can't tell your father because they'll start crying nepotism."

Victor nodded. "N-not that I think he'd do anything anyway. He's always on about getting me out of my shell. He'd probably call it all 'just male bonding.'"

Certainly sounded like Chief Inspector William Genial-To-A-Fault Van Dort to her. "Well then – guess I came along at just the right time, didn't I?" she said, sitting up a little straighter. "Hopefully ragging on the new city girl on the block will keep them from bothering you for a while."

Victor bit his lip again. "I don't – you shouldn't h-have to take the brunt of it. Marchand and Dormand can be nasty if you get up their noses."

Alice gave him her most unpleasant grin. "They're going to be in for some nastiness themselves if they think they can intimidate me." She handed back his notebook and turned away, pretending not to notice the hero worship look had come back. "All right, back to work. What's next on today's list?"

[fluorescentpipedream]

Ezra Hale - warning for content

@musesnotebook​

Ezra was awake long before his alarm had actually gone off, laying on his back and staring up at the ceiling. His father was already awake, and probably halfway through his first drink, Ezra could hear him downstairs crashing around in the kitchen. The alarm on the nightstand got only one round of beeps out before he turned it off and rolled out of bed, sighing softly. It was the first day back to O Fallon Township High School, he was going to be a junior this year and while he was happy it meant that there were only two years left before he’d be 18 and could leave...there were still two years left before he could leave. Pushing himself up on his other arm, Ezra sighed and walked into the bathroom. 

He usually got a cool shower in the morning because it helped wake him up and he needed to be a bit more on the ball, time to pretend everything is fine. I’m becoming one hell of an actor...He thought, looking down at the cast on his arm as he wrapped the shower protection around it. That was going to make things so much worse this year. Getting out he ran a comb through his dark brown hair, initially, it stayed behind his ear but he knew by the end of the day it was going to be in his eyes. He was starting to like it that way. Looping a soft towel around his hips he looked in the mirror one last time before opening the door and came face to chest with his father.

“Morning, dad.”

His father said nothing as his son carefully scooted past him, getting around the larger man relatively easily, despite him blocking the door almost like Frankenstein’s monster looming down at him. He was already drunk and Ezra scrunched up his nose, trying not to breathe in the sharp smell of beer at 7am. Ducking into his room he leaned against the door and locked it behind him, taking a few breaths before he pulled on a pair of skinny black jeans with striped white and black suspenders, pulling them over the top of a plain white t-shirt. He opted for a pair of black and white converse and snatched his backpack off his desk chair before tossing a look at his room. It was clean from the night before, he’d made his bed before he got a shower, there was nothing out for his mother to find when she came in looking for something to send his father after him when he got home. She usually came through when he was at school, looking for cigarettes, drugs, condoms...whatever. Anything she could tell his father about later. 

Walking out of his room he came down the stairs and stopped in the kitchen noticing his mother was making coffee. “Morning, mom.” She didn’t respond, just continued to stare at the coffee pot. She was as horrible as his father was at being a parent but she was still his mom, right? Ezra made himself a couple of Eggo French toast waffles and while they were in the toaster he moved around, getting a dark blue hyrdroflask from the cabinet and filled it with water from their cooler in the corner. After taking a drink of his bottle, he let out a sigh which got her attention.

“What was that sound for?”

“Nothing mom. Just...breathing.” Is that okay, you fucking cunt? He clenched up his free hand for a moment, resisting the urge to tell her off. He actually wanted to go to school today, at least he’d be away from them for a few hours. As his waffles popped up, he took them out, wrapped them in a napkin and then moved around her and out the door as quickly as he could. After eating his breakfast on the way to the bus stop, he took a pair of Skullcandy headphones out of his bag and put them on, turning on Nine Inch Nails to scream in his ears.

He fell asleep standing up for a few minutes before one of his classmates appeared beside him and he was suddenly aware that someone was attempting to talk to him. Yep, headphones totally mean talk to me, I’m listening! He sighed and pulled up one side of his headphones, looking over a young man named Paul. He was on the lacrosse team with Ezra. 

“Oh it’s you.” Honestly the only thing Paul had going for him was that he was good at sports. The boy had been dropped from the ugly tree, rolled down the dumbass hill, and was struck by an even uglier bus, so his rambling story of some girl who creamed herself looking at him was about as likely as Ezra finding out he was adopted. As he tried to put his headphones back over his ear with his bandaged hand, Paul suddenly realized there was an extra 2lbs attached and pointed at it somewhat excitedly. Ezra couldn’t help but imagine Paul as an annoying little chihuahua that got so excited it pissed itself. While he was trying not to snicker at the thought he also tried to remember what the rehearsed answer was.

“Jetski accident” he replied dryly. 

“That sucks. How’d it happen?”

“I lost control of the thing and ran it aground in the Lake of the Ozarks. Broke my wrist and got some bruises.”

“Oh man...that new coach might not let you play.”

Oh yeah...they’d gotten a new coach. He hadn’t even considered he wasn’t going to be the star player this year. Shit. The old coach had retired recently, Ezra had found out about it when his dad had come home from racquetball with the other man. He had been watching something on TV when his dad came home and started yelling about it, realized his son wasn’t listening and then positioned himself in front of the TV, starting over again. Ezra had turned off his show and looked up at his father expectantly. The man was livid, even though his friend had actually chosen to retire, not wanting to deal with pathetic kids anymore. They had no real gumption, whatever that was. The grumbling had continued on through most of the night, with his dad randomly bringing it up without much warning.

“She’s probably a fucking lesbian.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Ezra shouldn’t have asked but the comment had been so random over dinner that it had caught him off-guard. To his surprise, his father had actually answered him but it was an aggravated grumble about how women were taking all the jobs meant for men and how they needed to be reminded where their place was. Ezra mouthed along with him as he nearly screamed ‘in the goddamn kitchen, that’s where’ before turning his attention back to his dinner.

Shortly before the new school year started, Ezra had been sitting on the floor in front of the TV only half paying attention to the news when there was a report about how the drama and music teacher, Eliza Ramsey, was arrested for “indecent exposure” and had been caught contacting a 15 year old male student on Facebook and sending nudes to him. The cops were urging any students that may have had contact with her to come forward. Ezra had shifted uncomfortably, shooting a look back at his father and watched as the man’s face contorted. He had been angry about something already and this was just piqued his interest. Ezra frowned and took a shaky breath knowing where it was going to lead and some stupid part of him hoped maybe his dad would change his mind if he knew.

“Boys can’t be fucking raped. They can’t...men, real fucking men enjoy sex, especially if it’s with a bitch that hot.”

Mrs. Ramsey had been a beautiful woman, there was no lying about that. Short cropped blond hair and red lipstick most days, she had legs that went on for days and the kind of body that made most of the boys in the school get hard without even meaning to. Granted, in high school, that could happen when the wind blew but still. He had too, thinking how nice it would be to see what her skin tasted like. But it hadn’t been as good as he’d hoped. He had originally gone in to audition for the school’s version of Grease, singing Blue Moon for the role of Danny. She’d said he was okay, but she could help him if he wanted and before he’d really known what was happening, she had her hand on his thigh, squeezing. Ezra had tried to tell her no, but it hadn’t mattered.

His dad was still going on ad nauseum about how men are supposed to enjoy sex with a beautiful woman and if he got that chance he’d have jumped at it. When he’d gestured at his son, Ezra frowned, realizing how he hadn’t actually heard anything over his heart beating in his ears.

“Wouldn’t you, boy?”

“No.”

“What the fuck do you mean, no?”

“Um…”

“What...Are you about to tell me that if a beautiful woman wanted you in her bed you wouldn’t eat that shit up? What are you, a fucking faggot?”

“No! But it wasn’t like I had a choice!”

There was a flicker of acknowledgement on his father’s face and for a split second, Ezra was hopeful. The man had heard him. His son was raped and he was going to do something about it! Instead, the temperature rose in his father’s face, causing it to flush and Ezra scrambled off the ground, meeting his father on his feet and stared up at him. Alright so we’re throwing down...

“That woman had her hand on your cock?” 

“Yes...sir.” His tone was soft at first while he tried to find his voice. He was searching his dad’s face.  

“And you expect me to believe you didn’t fucking didn’t get hard?”

“That’s not fair…”

“Not fair? Life’s not fucking fair boy. Lay it out for me...how was it not fair?” His father was patronizing him and it was making him angrier.

“She wasn’t...she....I told her no, to stop...I....She had her hand on my dick and told me she was going to help me…” He stopped and looked up at his father, realizing he was too far in now to stop. He bit on his bottom lip to stop it from quivering but he could feel the heat coming to his cheeks and tears welling up. Why didn’t this man believe him? She hurt me, forced me to do things I didn’t want to do and somehow it’s my fault?!

“Help you do what?”

Ezra had searched his brain for something to say. All he could get out was a whispered, “be a man…”

“And by god she did it.”

“No! She RAPED ME!” Ezra had shouted suddenly, and his outburst surprised him as much as his father. His voice had crackled as the dam broke behind his eyes. With tears streaming down his face he’d pointed at his father and screamed at him.

“She hurt me! And you don’t even care do you? Some woman forced herself on your son and you’re too much of an asshole to even give a shit. Cause I was supposed to enjoy it?! I DID NOT WANT IT. I DID NOT FUCKING ASK FOR IT!” His voice was squeakier as he broke in front of the man.

“Do you even care it wasn’t just once? She called me into her office all year long and pushed me into the desk, her hands on me no matter how many times I begged her to stop. Why...why can’t you just care about me for once in my goddamn life?!” Ezra stopped screaming, with his right hand poking into his dad’s chest and as he’d met his father’s eyes he got his answer. His father took hold of his hand, making a jerking movement with it and broke the bone without even flinching. Must have been the former marine training...When Ezra had let out a cry, he’d been struck across the face and knocked into the wall. The hit had knocked the wind out of him but as he slipped down the wall, he’d looked up to see his mom standing just behind her husband as he was taking his belt off.

“Mom?”

“You should have known better.” She took her wine and walked out of the room.

“MOM!”  He cried out again as the belt hit him across the face. “Dad...please.” Stop begging you idiot, it’s making it worse. Instinctually, Ezra curled into the fetal position to protect himself and covered his head with his arms too. The beating had lasted until his dad had worn himself out. The man had stumbled back onto the couch again. “Fuckin little pussy. I raised you better than that, didn’t I?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Get cleaned up.”

“My wrist hurts...” He had squeaked out the words as he sat up and realized he couldn’t put any pressure on it. It was swelling already and his father had a moment where he actually looked like he felt bad. An hour later he was sitting in the emergency room telling a nurse he had been jumped as he was walking through the Hardee’s parking lot by a group of hooded men. His father was standing with his arms crossed over his chest giving Ezra a warning look as he lied to the woman with his swollen lip, broken wrist and red marks on his neck and back.

That was two weeks ago. The bruises and his lip had healed, but his wrist was going to be in a cast for the next few months.

Once the boys were on the bus, Paul had taken a sharpie out of his bag and had started handing it around to the other guys on the team, everyone writing something on his stupid cast. Ezra honestly wasn’t even paying attention and after a couple of people who obviously didn’t care any more than he did got on the novelty had worn off and he was finally left alone. He turned his music back up to an almost deafening volume and closed his eyes. When he got to school he stopped at his locker, putting his gym clothes on the bottom shelf for PE later and set his headphones and iPod on the top shelf.  

Homeroom was typical for the first day back. Announcements about new students, the change in staff following Ms. Ramsey’s unfortunate firing and once again a suggestion that any male student comes forward if they had any experience with her. The assistant principal was the same kind of dirtbag his father was so that was never going to happen. The man they hired had a complicated name that the man stumbled over a few times before just saying Mr. Lock, though he probably had intentionally mispronounced it at that point. “Mr. Lock comes from India, he should make for an interesting addition to our staff.” How did a man from Delhi wind up a teacher in this shithole? Ezra was drawing in his notebook with his other hand as the last round of announcements started. Lunch today was the fried rice and egg rolls, and of the panini bar was back up and running after being down much of the end of last year. The last announcement hit like a punch to the gut though.

“As I’m sure some of you are aware, Mr. Anderson, the coach for the Panthers Lacrosse Team has recently retired and in his place, we are proud to introduce Ms. Thomas as the new coach. She would like me to inform everyone that tryouts will be Friday and no one will have a reserved position this year, just because you were captain last year doesn’t mean you will make it this year.” Ezra cursed under his breath, he was going to have to tell his dad.

The rest of the day was a blur. History, biology, and chemistry passed quickly, his math class made him feel as stupid as ever. This new math shit was ridiculous. In an interest of reclaiming some control over the day he had taken to teasing and goading some of his favorites. To say he liked being a bully was really splitting hairs, he liked the control it gave him over the situation in most cases but he knew that if any of his so-called friends found out that he used to go to Brentwood Dance Studios they would probably turn all their hate on him. The new kid was an easy target, tall and scrawny as fuck with a stupid leather cord with a feather attached to his hair and a dorky hat. He’d give Andy one thing, the boy didn’t back down from him and instead he turned back to one of his favorites.

Emma was an easy target for him too. She was fat, shy and adopted, all the best for bullies to pick on. The sad thing was, he had a crush on her back in junior high. As Ezra had started a new round he was stopped by Evan Rogers, one of the other boys on the lacrosse team and Ezra’s ex-best friend. Why they’d stopped being friends was incidental, but it had more to do with jealousy on Ezra’s side. Evan wanted to be a theater geek and his dad had been rough about it until he’d seen how much talent his son really had. Evan had been Danny last year, Ezra had lost the will to do it after everything and as much as he wanted to tell his friend, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Evan had about a foot on Ezra and his shoulders were as broad as a house, the boy did not look like a high school student at all, especially now that he’d put on added muscle over the summer. Ezra playfully raised his arms like he was trying to protect himself, before backing off for now. Tomorrow was another day.

Right before history he was asked into the guidance counselor’s office and already he wasn’t in the mood for it.

“Mr. Hale, have a seat.”

“Sure...why am I here?”

“Well...the nurse tells me you’ve got a pretty nasty fracture in your right wrist and because of that you can’t play any of our team sports this year.”

“It’s only going to take 8 weeks to heal, sir...Can’t I still try out and just play when it heals, I’m one of the top players!”

“That’s not really fair to the other students that might want to get a chance to play, is it?”

Who gives a fuck? “Yeah....” Asshole. “Then what am I supposed to do?” He wasn’t fast enough for track, despite being tall and slim, and while the school had a lot of teams, almost all of them would involve something he couldn’t do with one hand. “Well... I think we might look at something a little off the beaten path for you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Something you’ve never done before. How about Home Ec?”

Over my father’s dead body. “I’d rather not.”

“What about drama?” Ezra felt his pulse quicken. More than anything, he had wanted to be an actor since his grandmother had taken him to see West Side Story when he was 9. He was going to be an actor, he told her. He was going to be in music videos and movies and on the stage under the lights and making everyone look at him. She would never get to see it happen, unfortunately, and he had tried to perform at her funeral but was knocked down several pegs by his father. “Real men don’t prance around in tights and no son of mine is gonna be a fucking dancer.”

“I could make a lot of money, I’ve got a pretty face and I could take care of you and mom for the rest of your lives.” He had tried to reason with his father but the man was having none of it. Ezra had let it go but had started sneaking around to do the things he wanted, the dance classes at the same time as a kickboxing class downtown? He could take the bus to St. Louis, that wasn’t a problem. After Mrs. Ramsey though he’d lost a lot of the will to do it anymore.

“Mr. Hale? Shall I sign you up for drama?”

“Do I have a choice?” He had some enemies in that class. Evan had joined the little group in the middle of last year, Darnell was part of it, Emma...pretty much everyone he had ever picked on was in one room. Welcome to hell.

“Is there a reason you wouldn’t want to be in drama?”

No good reason. “Not really.”

“Good! Having a background in the arts also looks good on college admissions as well.”

“Okay.”

Ezra was excused and headed to his locker to get out his textbook and notebook for English. He felt hollow inside and shifted somewhat uncomfortably in his seat as he sat and listened to the teacher start her lesson. She was one of his favorite teachers, always had a kind smile and genuinely cared about her students, not in the creepy way Mrs. Ramsey had either. If there was ever anything wrong, she said she was always open to talk. He’d never taken advantage of that and was even more scared to do so now. Scratching his pencil over his notebook to at least look like he was paying attention his mind was far away.

On one hand, he was excited about the prospect of getting to go to drama every other day, but at the same time, he had to go home tonight and tell his father that he wasn’t going to be able to be on the lacrosse team or any other team for that matter because of his broken wrist. A wrist his father broke but somehow was going to end up being his fault. His arm throbbed and he suddenly felt a cold shiver creep down his shoulders. After a second his hand shot up to get the teacher’s attention. 

“Yes, Ezra do you have a question?”

“May I be excused?” She looked a little bewildered at the sudden interruption but nodded her head, scribbling a hall pass but Ezra was out the door before she could hand it to him. Once in the hall he covered his mouth with his hand and tried to make to to the bathroom as quickly as he could. That plan didn’t exactly work, Ezra had only made it a few steps towards the bathroom before he took his hand away and vomited. He gasped for breath, feeling his body shake and before the next wave hit him he ducked into the room nearest him, dropping hard onto his knees and throwing up again.

Resting his right arm on the edge of the bowl he laid his head against it for a moment before reaching up and flushing the toilet. It took him a few seconds to realize that someone was behind him, and while he’d expected to hear one of the guys teasing him, the first thing he noticed was a pair of shiny silver flats. His eyes traveled up the rest of the body and he was met with brilliant red hair and bright green eyes. Roxie. What the hell is she doing in the boys....Oh fuck.

Roxie Phillips was a bit of a pariah herself. She had gotten pregnant last year and was bullied into leaving by the principal. Her and Ezra had a brief moment when she had found him sitting outside with a cigarette in his hand, tears streaming down his face and his pants still unzipped. She hadn’t asked, probably because she knew. Considering the father of her baby was the assistant scumbag. Roxie said nothing when she’d found him out there, simply sat down beside him and laid her head on his shoulder while he cried. He’d found out from her friend Lily that she was encouraged not to come back to school in her fragile state. She was back and actually looked pretty good for a girl who just had a baby.  Ezra had gone to see her in the hospital after she’d had her son and told her if she ever wanted to tell him something else about his father, that he wasn’t some fucked up rapist, he’d take the rap for it. She had thanked him but said she didn’t want to ruin his life. Besides, she wasn’t ashamed of her son, she was ashamed of the man who gave him to her.

“Ez...” Roxie’s tone was gentle as she knelt beside him and rubbed on his back  before getting up again. Ezra closed his eyes, trying to talk his body into stopping this revolt and could hear the water running. He sat up to face the toilet again though he was only dry heaving at this point. He nearly jumped out of his skin when she put a cold paper towel against his head, pulling his hair out of his face and mouth. Ezra frowned, coughed and spit out blood before he flushed the toilet again. He took a couple of shaky breaths before pushing himself up off the ground and sort of motioned for Roxie to leave the stall. Once she was out he closed the door so he could take a piss, though he knew she hadn’t left the bathroom.

“Well let’s hear it, Phillips.” He sighed, trying to figure out how to recover from whatever the hell that was. Stress is a terrible thing. His eyes blurred a little as he stared down at the bowl, his movements mechanical more than intentional.

“I’m not sure what you’re expecting me to say, Ezra. You just threw up in the hall and on some kid’s locker and now you’re in the handicapped stall in the girl’s bathroom. I think you’re probably beating yourself up enough.” Ezra sighed, readjusted himself and opened the door, leaning against the frame of the stall. Lifting his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, Roxie clicked her tongue against her teeth.

“Did your dad do that?” He looked a little taken aback by her sudden revelation but said nothing. “I used to make up all kinds of shit to explain my bruises and black eyes, though my old man never actually broke a bone.”

“It was an accident at the Lake of the Ozarks, my jetski ran aground.”

“That’s a pretty good one.”

“It’s not a lie.”

“Okay.”  

Roxie moved into her purse and handed him a small piece of candy which he stared at until she explained she used them for her nausea, they work wonders and told him he might want to change his shirt.

“By the way, your fly is down.”  

He blushed, zipping it and looked past her at his reflection in the mirror. He looked horrible. Fuck, I just want to go home. Popping the hard candy in his mouth, the sudden sour taste almost made him spit it back out. Walking out of the girls’ bathroom he glanced down at the spot on the floor that the janitor had already started cleaning up, cursing up a storm. First day and someone already threw up in the hall...Ezra moved past him and down to his locker where he took out the shirt he’d been wearing in PE and changed right there in the hallway, unclipping his suspenders while he was at it. His knees were weak and he felt like he was going to drop under the weight of the world.

What a mess. It took him a few seconds to realize that he wasn’t alone at his locker and closed the door, coming face to face with a slightly older boy named Ben who was holding his backpack. 

“You look like shit.”

“Fuck the Asian bar.” He couldn’t think of anything else. Ben raised an eyebrow but set his bag down again and patted Ezra on the shoulder before walking away from him. Ben was one of the few people that was immune to Ezra’s bullying, but then again he was older. He’d been held back following a car accident a few years ago, the assistant principal kept trying to get him to just take his GED and leave but for whatever reason, Ben wouldn’t do it. Ezra watched him walk over to the new kid and strike up a conversation and for a moment he wanted to walk over and actually introduce himself like a normal person. He didn’t though and instead switched out his books for the last time, grabbing what he was going to need for his homework for the night and closed the locker, staring at it for a moment. 

He didn’t really want to go to drama like this and meet the new teacher and have to pretend like he was okay but he didn’t have a lot of other options. He could go to the nurse and say he wasn’t feeling well but she’d probably call his mom who would have to send his dad to go get him, which meant a hell of a lecture on the way home and the possibility that he’d just end up hurling in his dad’s BMW while he was getting yelled at again. Not gonna happen.

He could go out back and try to hide, but he’d probably get caught and then he’d have detention on the first day. Another fight he didn’t want to deal with. He started heading toward the drama classroom and stopped outside of it. The teacher had a thick Indian accent and was correcting the class on the pronunciation of his name. It wasn’t Lock, it was Lahk, but they could call him Mr. K if they wanted. Since his first name was Kiernan. Ezra paused before deciding his best option was to go to the nurse. He still felt sick and like he just wanted to curl up in the fetal position and cry.  

The school nurse was a kind hearted black woman and had given him a small cup of water and sent him back to one of the cots behind a curtain in the back. Lying on his right side he pulled his arms over his head and curled tightly in on himself, quietly letting the walls fall down around him. He fell asleep there for the last hour, waking up only when the nurse carefully laid her hand on his shoulder.

“School’s over sweetie, do you want me to call your parents to come get you?”

“hmm...no. I can take the bus.” He got up and wiped his face on his shirt, picking up his bag again. It was open and when he looked in it he found a couple of sets of notes from Roxie, one from history and the other from drama, they already had their first assignment in both classes and he sighed, closing his bag and shifted it over his shoulder.

“What a horrible day.” With any luck his dad wouldn’t be home when he got there and he could just sleep through the rest of the day. 

[raynewolferune]

Ngl, this seems like a very Danny problem to have. Falling for dead people/killers runs in the family. Jazz with Johnny (getting her body taken over to Kitty is effectively the same as killing Jazz herself), Danny and Valerie (she was trying to kill him), probably Dan and his Valerie counts too (I imagine at some point Dan started trying to kill her as a form of flirting and/or denial of said flirting), and Ellie has probably encounter and flirted with Stabby Robbin Damian at this point (who tried to actually stab her). It's a Fenton Family Curse. Even Maddie tried to hamstring Jack on their first date.

Danny x ra's but their a fresh from a nasty breakup and danny is just going through the breakup motions watch your favourites eat ice cream cry all that jazz but in gotham why?

Because i want the bat's to come across this guy crying on a roof eat ice cream and comforing him trying to get him off the roof and when they ask what his boyfriends name is he juat says ra's fucking al ghul

"It's not fair" he whines "why are tge hot ones always the leaders of some murder cult"

I just want the bat's trying to wrap their head around the fact that this twink was sumhow dating ra's and presumably dumped him because he was the head of a murder cult and HOW IS HE STILL ALIVE