#and don't think too hard about this i def don't have trauma surrounding my autonomy don't worry about it :)

[kintsugiscars]

-; autonomy

Lex has very little autonomy within the Scions, and that's by choice. He learned very young that the only way people wouldn't be scared of him was if they perceived him on a leash.

It was when he and Alphinaud fled to Camp Dragonhead that he made his first choice. He was 16, Alphinaud 14 - both of them hardly more than children. When they finally got their bearings inside from the snow, Lex realized he had a choice to make. He could break down, give into terror and grief and loss like the scared kid he was; or, he could become the Warrior of Light - a beacon they both needed. One of them had to be strong, and it wasn't going to be Alphinaud. So, he buried his fear and grief and became a smiling, helpful hero. He didn't make choices - all he did was go along with whatever Alphinaud needed and supported his little brother.

Around then, Lex tried to sneak back across the border. He had just lost G'raha to the Crystal Tower, and wanted to apologize to Rammbrose for the injuries he caused. Being a kid, his disguise wasn't the greatest. This didn't stop him from being able to go through Mor Dhona, as the Crystal Braves who recognized him were terrified of what he could do. The Warrior of Light was a force of nature, now untethered to a single cause.

That very real fear, that people were scared of him just because he was a fugitive, made Lex realize that there was only one way he was going to be able to survive. And that was to give someone his leash.

After that point, and once the Scions regrouped, Lex makes noticeably less decisions for himself. He defaults to what the Scions what, or more specifically: what Alphinaud, Alisae, G'raha, and Tataru want. He plays along with every ploy, with every desire they have. Even when Urianger betrays him multiple times, he's okay with this. He played his part as a pawn well - the only part he allows himself to have anymore. His speech patterns also change to reflect this. When he is the "Warrior of Light" he speaks formally, and with proper enunciation. He mimics some of Urianger's speech patterns, as well as Alphinaud's. This is unnatural for him and something he actively does.

This does frequently conflict with his desire for a pacifist solution, but he justifies his "disobedience" with the script he lays out for himself. The "Warrior of Light" is someone that would try for diplomacy and pacifism anyway so it would be "allowed".

His sense of needing to be kept on a leash only increases after his body changes post-Innocence fight.