#and by built I mean commissioned ofc
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arolesbianism · 6 months ago
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Having a rain world oc moment. Dysfunctional family of the year award, they were so toxic that one of them found a way to kill themselves in a world where that was supposed to be physically impossible
#rat rambles#rain posting#oc posting#tbc Im talking abt my sliver local iterator group ocs that exists in a narrative place that borders on au#as in the stuff I do with sliver there is the sort of thing Id Never want to be anywhere near canon as I think the best thing narratively#would be for sliver to legitimately just be some guy who happened to find the solution first#but for my enjoyment and the sake of exploring some hashtag themes I chose to have this bubble where they should never breach#oh also idk if Ive said this but Ive renaimed star shes now a stars gaze 👍#just thought her old name was a bit too similar to moon's + it stood out a bit too much amongst the rest of her circle#I also should probably get around to doing a second take on her design at some point since my first concept was very eh#and then maybe one day Ill get to the other three lol#golden boon is a big maybe tho cause quite frankly I don't wanna figure out what I want to do with her design#oh this reminds me I should probably rename to the horizon too simply because her name is kinda boring#I mean all of them are in a way but like y'know#untold prosperity is more of a fit vibe wise than the other three but star is named after her location and the other two were named by a#shitty rich guy who built one of them to be a company town and the other to be a shitty rich person vacation spot#and by built I mean commissioned ofc#this is why boon's puppet just absolutely sucks for them to be stuck with due to it being decorated super heavily#like he has a full gold mask and everything she had to tear that thing off at some point to prevent fruther complications#I could just rename horizon to golden horizon for the bit#just make it abyndantly clear that these two had the same sponsor and he had no ideas#I might actually do that I think itd be funny#but yeah tbf to boon horizon and prosperity sliver mostly did what she did because of star#but on the other hand they absolutely did not help the situation at all and were violently emotionally distant from her the entire time#prosperity wasnt at first intentionally pushing sliver away. they were just too focused on trying to contact star after she cut her coms#but then star sent her 50 page essay on why she hates horizons guys and how she things theyre a horrible person and they snapped#the two used to have a fairly friendly relationship and were much closer back when they were the only two iterators in the area#but as the others came along a rift started forming between the two as prosperity tried rly hard to be the responsible one of the group and#felt that star was forcing all the work of maintaining their volitile fellow iterators onto them#and star felt like horizon had become less and less of a friend and more and more of a coworker every cycle
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coagulatedink · 4 months ago
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[ Art Fight Page - Buy Me a Coffee - Commission Info ] Last "Friendly Fire" for Art Fight 2024! More info under the cut!
As I mentioned in my submission, this was supposed to be a nice, easy, simple little illustration. Whoops! Haha thats ok, I like where it ended up! Because the artist, Lati-Wanders, requested a pusheen (and said we could dress Cloud up) I thought it could be fun to lean into Decora fashion!
"The term decora originated from the Japanese katakana word for decoration (デコレーション). It’s used to describe a style full of color, cute characters and a whole lot of accessories.[1]
As a child of the 90s, and a lover of manga from an early age, I've been super into Japanese street fashion for a long, long time. Its only been more recently that I've been able to research and consume content relating to Japanese street fashion, and have found myself falling in love with the Decora style thanks to an amazing artist on YouTube named cybrgrl! If you're curious about the style, and similar ones, I highly recommend checking out her content! And if you just want a little taste of what Decora looks like here's an article from 2015 with pics from a fashion walk![2] Now! Back to the art!
The three Pusheen I chose were what helped my color palette and over-all design for the painting! I ended up picking these three and slowly built the image up around them. About halfway through painting I realized that kkderobst had subconsciously influenced some of the styleization- which isn't too crazy in retrospect, I have been watching a lot of their shorts recently and they use gouache!!
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Above is a slightly blurry version of the final painting before I brought it into clip! As mentioned I used Himi paints, specifically their jelly gouache, along with Utrecht, Van Gogh, Daler Rowney and Blick watercolors/gouache. I also used color pencils (I think very old prismacolors?) and tombow brush markers with mixed results. A lot of this was layering colors, seeing if I liked it, and if I didn't enjoy how something looked I would put another color on top of it. The paper bag allowed for some cool texture, but it really wasn't made for saturation and made layering/figuring colors out tricky. Ofc thats what you get when you work on top of something that isn't made for paint!! No shock there!
FINAL THOUGHTS
I think I would have liked how more of this looked if I used..well really any references lol! The final product isn't bad by any means!! Its great! I just think if I had taken the time to use references, maybe play around with colors before hand, that version of this painting would have more oomph. Thats ok though! I like it! Lati likes it! So thats 2 wins- and I'll take it! (Also she made this SUPER CUTE icon of Guy and yall should look at it if you have an AF account!!)
Further Reading & Viewing; - Another article on Decora Kei - j-Fashion Wiki entry on Decora - cybrgrls playlist on Decora! Very insightful and fun!! - Lati-Wanders Art Fight page (please check her out)!! - My thoughts on AF 2024 / Art Process of AF 2024
[1] https://japantoday.com/category/features/lifestyle/tokyo-fashion-subculture-%27decora%27-%E2%80%93-color-cute-characters-and-a-whole-lot-of-accessories [2] https://tokyofashion.com/harajuku-decora-fashion-walk-pictures/
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izusun · 3 years ago
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One more rambling because I can't get it out of my head:
Quirkless!vigilante!Izuku and Not a villain!Himiko, they're friends. They go pedophile hunting together, it's great.
But the Hero Commission hasn't lifted the ban on quirkless people going to hero schools, so Himiko goes instead.
So there are two threads. One is vigilante/informant Izuku, who is barely connected to the criminal underground and is instead plugged into the homeless network and gets his information that way. The other is former vigilante UA student Himiko, who accepts One For All after saving Uraraka during the entrance exam.
Himiko falls for Ochaco (Togachaco rights), has a passive aggressive friendship with Bakugou, makes friends with both the traditional Dekusquad and Bakusquad, and irrationally hates Aoyama for no reason. She's also more mentally stable because she doesn't have a blood deficiency.
The series goes somewhat as normal. At the USJ, Himiko accidentally kills the Nomu, whoopsies, and Izuku absolutely kicks Stain's ass. Also when the dorms are built, Izuku regularly sneaks onto UA campus to chill with Himiko (and also maybe fight/smooch Bakugou) to the confusion of everyone. Including Nedzu. That fact makes Aizawa terrified of the kid.
Especially when the class starts talking about body counts, Izuku cheerfully exclaims he has a lot before he pauses and says "Oh, you mean in bed," and begins recounting how he and Himiko used to go pedo hunting, where one of them would be the bait and the other one the killer. Himiko can't anymore but Izuku sure still does~
Anyways morally ambiguous Izuku and Himiko bromance, thank you and goodnight.
- Goblin anon
im sorry but IZUTOGA BROMANCE IS THE BEST THING EVER!! followed by togaocha because togaocha rights!!!!
toga accepting ofa is such a wild concept i didn’t know i needed. because she’s actually really smart and strong and ferocious. she’s also very loyal. so ofa!toga, especially loved and raised in UA is just *ascends*
im having a crisis because ofc i want toga in class 1a because she’d fit right in. but also…vlad king personally teaching toga because their quirks are so similar??? toga being afraid of her quirk and then vlad king comes in the hero scence and she sees him and it’s basically like he’s her all might??? yes pleaseeeew
like vlad king fighting aizawa for rights to teach toga. he’s saying how aizawa can have the rest but he really just wants toga because he’s seen that look in toga’s eyes before (the look that shows how scared one is of their own quirk) because it used to be what was shining from his own eyes.
BUT ALSO TOGA IN 1A HNSNNN
toga hating aoyama…because midoriya kind of is taken by aoyama’s detachment yet strong loyalty to 1a. and toga’s like damn it he (aoyama) fits in izu-chan’s taste for friends.
nezu realizing half a semester later (so approx. a month in a half after the dorms were built) that there’s something wrong with his security codings. when he traced it back, he finally realized that midoriya, ever since the year started, was slipping in and out of UA undetected.
nezu, however, doesn’t know how. he keeps trying to change the code but overnight, it’s changed back to midoriya’s intricate codes. he pings aizawa and aizawa gets the memo the moment he walked in on 1a dorms to check on them only to see midoriya chilling in the common rooms with a mud mask on because it’s girls’ night and he was adopted by the girls after he did something to mineta that permanently changed the way mineta looked at the girls. they don’t know what he did, all they know is midoriya left mineta’s room with a smile and mineta, who followed suit, was full on shaking and wouldn’t meet others’ eyes.
aizawa sees the way he’s sitting beside toga (mido-toga-ocha) and groans.
aizawa walks back out and pretends he didn’t see him because it’s already night time and clearly the girls trust him. he’ll report the incident to nezu tomorrow morning instead.
next week, aizawa checks up on them again and this time sees midoriya and bakugou having a moment in the kitchen. bakugou’s cooking and midoriya’s perched at the counter, legs swinging while bakugou grunts at him every time he pauses after his whole rant.
aizawa pretends he doesn’t see anything again, especially because when he turned to look at his students in question, toga did that “disturb them and i’ll end you” pose. aizawa walks away.
THE BODY COUNT SJKASQA
aizawa, hearing the class talk about body counts, skillfully walks away again only to wall back in when midoriya chirps “with a knife!” when kaminari asked how’d he manage to have that much body count.
OKOK BUT WHEN TOGA’S FALLING AFTER HITTING THE ZERO POINTER AND OCHA SLAPPED HER HAND AT HER BACK, SHE TURNS TO OCHA AND SAYS “fuck i didn’t know angels existed” AND PASSED OUT
ocha definitely did not fall in love there wdym. but toga definitely did
also THE BKDK BEING BAKUGOU SEEING HIS GREMLIN CHILDHOOD FRIEND SLITHERING FROM THE WINDOWS AND GOING LIKE “fuck he’s still the same lil shit” BEFORE FALLING ASLEEP AGAIN AND MIDORIYA SEES BAKUGOU AND SCREAMS IN HIS HEAD BECAUSE “oh no he’s hot”
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bnhaficsforthesoul · 4 years ago
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BNHA characters and their genshin experiences
I've been way into genshin for the past couple months, if anyone wants to play with me message me (I'm lvl 45 rn) but be warned I have shitty internet and am a partial razor main
but this is mainly characters I can see actually putting time into genshin
Bakugou
Mains: Yanfei
his main has probably been most every pyro character at some point
he wants diluc so bad, whenever someone else complains that diluc ruined their pity he wants to ruin their existence
before yanfei his main was probably hu Tao
hed definitely play klee if he had her lmao but he doesnt and is patiently waiting for her rerun
he has a lot of 5 star characters and is f2p, he can always get banner characters within at least the first pity, but for standard 5 stars hes gotten keqing and qiqi way too many times and hes livid
especially as a previous hu tao main, he was begging for Jean, still has yet to come home
hes probably a very high level, not fully maxed out considering he hasnt been playing all that long, he was probably forced to start when the rest of the bakusquad started playing it and he just took off
has really shitty artifact luck though, like his characters arent bad or anything but they could be so, so much better
and ugh hes livid
explores everything, has 100% exploration everywhere, but hes not bored hes still got artifact farming to do and he enjoys terrorizing enemies
in co op he will set you and everything around you on fire. cope.
Todoroki
Mains: Xiao or Ganyu
probably only started playing because Izuku asked him to
kaeya has also been on his team since day 1 and he is never leaving doesnt matter his friendship has been level 10 for weeks now who cares
was f2p until xiao, who didnt want to come home at all, and he finally got him on his 180th pull
now he doesnt care and will buy primogems whenever hes bored
he has a lot of constellations on kaeya and hes so proud of that, probably c4, is considering buying way too many primogems just so that he can hopefully get his c6
now his artifact luck is godly, you'll go into a domain with him and be like ugh I got nothing and hes like I got a 4 piece set with all attack or crit rate/damage main stats like haha I hate you
but yeah his characters are very strong cause of this, but he doesnt put effort into building a lot of them, he only levels up and gives good artifacts to his team and a couple other characters he likes but everyone else just sits there for a while
hes not super obsessed with the game, but he does think its funny seeing bakugou get so upset whenever they do domains together
doesnt even bother doing daily tasks really unless hes trying to save primogems
Midoriya
Mains: Venti
hes so good at building characters, like he looks up builds online and watches those "do INSANE damage with these tips" videos - and he sets out to get them done and he does
bakugou is once again livid whenever they play together, because Izuku barely has to try and can do so much more damage than him
he does have to put in a lot of work for his artifacts though because he doesnt settle for the okay ones he needs the absolute best
he builds his favorite characters the most ofc, but he evenly distributes things to other characters he knows can be useful- those characters might not have insane stats but they're still good
will not kill timmies pigeons, hell hunt birds in the wild for fun though
definitely a food hoarder
also does a lot of exploring and probably has at least 90% for each area
Kaminari
Mains: Lisa
he is 1000% in love with Lisa, he took her quest very seriously
and so many people say shes horrible, he hates it, hes made her crazy strong out of spite
his team consists of only his wifus- meaning lisa, beidou, rosaria, and mona
for a long time beidou was his second but then rosaria came along and hes like ugh big tiddy goth gf, but lisa still remains queen
these are the only characters hes built though, save for a couple like probably razor and xiangling that he used before he fully got this team
is an ayaka saver
he doesnt care too much about most 5 stars but will sometimes get them just to say he has them, but they end up just sitting there rotting away because he never puts work into them
he does have hu tao though and would get ganyu if she ever had a rerun
Kirishima
Mains: Diluc Razor or Beidou
they're all on his team, the last person switches out but it's most likely zhongli or childe
hes all about dps, support who, he just wants to hit hard and do insane damage , so yes he made dps zhongli
except his builds arent that great, with some help his builds are decent, but on his own hell be like ugh that's some sexy 300 damage
probably didnt know what 90% of the stats even meant and just put random attack ones on people and went yeah that looks good
doesnt really care though and is just having fun so hell play how he wants (as he should) but he does have to ask for help when farming bosses
loves exploring but misses so much, hell get distracted easily and end up just messing around
honestly probably hasnt bothered to ascend his world since he got to level 35, if he did the quest hed probably go straight to 45 and even then hed still have extra exp because hes been there for so long oml
but eventually he would have to and hed be trying to do it like :,) this is fine and it takes him a lot of tries but he gets there eventually,,, only to immediately have another one waiting for him poor baby
Mina
Mains: Klee or Xiangling
thinks baizhu is hot (and is correct) so shes desperately waiting for him
was a I must play 24/7 player until after the last story quest, then she got kinda bored but still plays frequently so she can save primogems and likes playing co op
goes into random peoples worlds a lot
shes got some pretty strong characters and is proud of her account
definitely makes tiktoks of her playing with the bakusquad cause it's always v chaotic (it's probably only denki and kirishima most of the time, but sometimes either bakugou or sero will join in)
does all the genshin tiktok trends
shes a pretty high level since shes probably been playing for a while and has most everything done
she loves helping lower level people though she thinks it's so cute and loves the power she feels when she one shots things
Sero
Mains: Xingqui
hes a pretty casual player, kinda only plays when hes bored or the others make him play with them
but his stats arent too bad, they're fairly average but he gets by
has so many primogems because he doesnt bother to wish on anyone, probably wants kazuha though
he does get super invested into the story though, hes so curious about the world and where the story is gonna lead
probably watches a lot of genshin theory videos and now he over thinks everything in the game
he explores a lot, not so much to find every single thing but more so just because he likes looking at everything, hes very excited for all the new places
Shinsou
Mains: Childe
hes a very thorough player, he explores a lot and puts a lot of work into building his characters
most of them arent all that great but he has plans to fix them
his main team is very well built, not the best, but still good
he struggles when he has to switch someone out for a domain or something because his other characters are so painfully mediocre right now and he feels so bad
shinsou, playing a character that can do like max 200 physical damage and biggest damage is like 2 thousand, repeatedly saying I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you deserve so much better, I'm so sorry
even if it's not the worst damage by far, he feels bad about anything under his main team's stats because they're just so much higher
broke. has no primogems. spent them all on childe and his constellations. does he regret it? well he sure does appreciate his c6 so- hell manage
yes he spent real money on his stupid mass murderer who he loves very much
fights childe every day even though he already collected the treasure, he is but a humble simp
probably decently lucky with wishing like he can beat the 50/50 almost every time
Tamaki
Mains: Chongyun and Sucrose
he only started playing recently, probably kirishima got him into it, but he immediately fell in love
kirishima was like tell me when you're level 16 so we can play together !!! and 2 days later tamaki was level 16 and kiri was shook because how the hell did he do it so fast
hates domains, the dread he feels when he realizes the lower level isnt going to give him anything anymore, and he has to move up to the next, and the next,,
asks kirishima to help him only to realize he isnt much help, is too nice to say that so he let's kiri keep trying- one day kiri gets deku to play with the two of them and tamaki almost cries because finally he can get through the level 90 domain and actually get things ugh
cannot get xingqui to save his life he refuses to come home and poor tamaki is so sad he wants him a lot hes even got all his materials saved up
Monoma
Mains: Ningguang
honestly doesnt play all that much but takes pride in making his account seem v good, is a whale
but hes very good at the game, didnt know what the artifacts were for at first and gave people ones based on how they looked but once he figured it out hes fixed them
is a very standard player, logs in every day to do his commissions and use his resin then logs out, he doesnt put too much time into the game and doesnt worry if he misses a day or two
worships ningguang, also really likes xinyan, his other team members are probably venti and albedo
has every single banner 5 star that has come out since he started playing, probably doesnt have klee though and is v upset about it, and is thanking the heavens for all the reruns lately
also doesnt have keqing and wants her a lot cause he likes her
accepts every single co op request he gets, and despite what a lot may think hes actually a very nice person to play with, not toxic at all - unless you're someone he knows then he might be mean to you shshshsh
Shigaraki
Mains: Razor
haha isnt it so odd that they sound so similar haha (if you dont know they have the same japanese va and I'm guessing hed play it in Japanese)
obviously he can be kinda busy ya know being a criminal and all that but when hes not he puts a lot of time into genshin
sadly doesnt have very good luck when it comes to characters or artifacts, but hes doing his best even with 0 primogems and his 50% crit rate
doesnt explore all that much, most of the exploring hes done came from him trying to get all the oculus
his razor is so good though, except that's the only character hes put tons of effort into
except for now zhongli, hes not replacing razor but ugh does he love zhongli
but his other characters are pretty mediocre at best, he could build them if he wanted to, hes good enough at gaming to figure it out, he just doesnt have the time to spend to do it so he focuses on his main team
also (spoiler alert kinda) when we had to go to the wolf spirit to fight the abyss herald and razor was there, afterwards how razor was saying how he was too weak and stuff and was super sad, at that very moment shiggy decided the entire abyss order had to be destroyed - sorry aether (he chose lumine) but razor is more important than you
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anunvalidcritic · 4 years ago
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The Falcon and the Winter Soldier: S1 - EP5
(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.)
I want to apologize for posting this so late. I got the times confused! Any whoo there better be a fuckin’ tag team in this episode after what happened in the last episode....
                                                    TRUTH
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smfh he fuckin’ raged on that guy. Like his 
Get that fuckin’ shield back now!!
Bro the blood on that shield is a fuckin’ sight to see.
BUCKY and SAM better tag team that motherfucker!!!!
come on BUCKY you fucked IRON MAN during a tag team get his ass!!!!!
aww shit now BUCKY is Stitch with a glitch
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bruh they just need to 
“I am CAPTAIN AMERICA.” - JOHN W. 
BRO HIS ARM!!!!!! (oh well...)
HIS BACK IS OUTTA COMMISSION! GO TF TO SLEEP!!!!!
great shot of BUCKY holding the shield..
No one can honestly blame SAM for turning the shield in. He didn’t know they were going to do that to it. 
“Sometimes there’s nothing to do until there’s something to do.” - JOAQUIN
this is not the time to save your ass JOHN
“I only ever did what you asked of me, what you told me to be and trained me to do, and I did it. And I did it well. [] You built me. Senator, I am Captain America.” - JOHN W. 
The beginning was him telling the truth, but that last part was him being delulu
JULIA LOUIS DREYFUS!?!?!?!?! With purpler hair!?!?!?
now you know damn well that there’s information on that business card. 
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ofc, he went to the memorial sight.
BUCKY got the glock ready 
“I took the liberty of crossing of crossing out my name in your book. I hold no grudges for what you thought you had to do.” - ZEMO
ZEMO has better morals than fuckin’ JOHN W. 
I mean kinda sticks out in Wakanda AYO...
“Them stars and stripes don’t mean nothing good to me.” - ISAIAH
Shiiii.... I’d be bitter too tf
motherfuckers locked him up
smh ofc they told them it was a fuckin’ Tetanus shot
30 years... that’s a long fuckin’ time...
Shout out the fuckin’ nurse, bro!
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“You think things are different? You think times are different? You think I wouldn’t be dead in a day if you brought me out? You wanna believe that jail is my fault because you’ve got that white man’s shield.” - ISAIAH
He has a point SAM you’re being a little to optimistic about this one. 
“They will never let a black man be CAPTAIN AMERICA.” - ISAIAH
yeah go home SAM because that’s all you can do at the moment
SARAH + eyes + BUCKY = love at first sight
“Hi, I’m BUCKY.” - BUCKY lmao
“They don’t care that you wear small T-shirts, have six toes, or that your mom is your aunt.” - SAM
“But don’t flirt with my sister. Because if you do, I’ll have CARLOS cut you up and feed you to the fishes.” - SAM
ROFL said “okay” real quick 
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That man did not fuckin’ do that. We all know it was KARLI. 
if I could rip that shit off the wall, I would.
lol those kids are funny :D
The way that shield comes back like a boomerang is crazy.
Damn BUCKY it took you til the fifth episode to say “I’m sorry” but total understandable. lol
BUCKY fiddlin’ that book around all nervous and shit..
“You weren’t amending, you were avenging.” - SAM
que Avengers theme song
ICONIC DIALOGUE
SAM - I’m sure there’s at least one person in that book that needs closure on something, and you’re the only one who can give it to ‘em.”
BUCKY - “Probably a dozen.”
SAM - “That’s cool. Start with one.”
BUCKY - “Good talk.”
SAM - “You know KARLI won’t stop.” 
BUCKY - “You call me when you have a lead, and I’ll be there. Not neccesarily as a team.”
SAM - “Nope.”
BUCKY - “We’re not that good.”
SAM - “Definitely not.”
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They’re such a funny duo
I think we all know who he’s gonna start with.  
I was just thinkin’ that the boat needs a good paint job now
“I’mma show them. I’mma go out and change the world.” - SAM
lots of people feel that way about life bro... such a true thought to have in one’s mind
TRAIN MOFO TRAIN!!!!!
THAT WAS A COOL FUCKIN’ MONTAGE!!!!!!!!!
BRUH i fuckin’ love KARLI’s accent lol
KARLI has really lost her mind now. I understand how she feels, but this isn’t the way to do it. 
“One world. One people”
finally, he’s opening the Wakandan suitcase
it’s a fuckin’ suit isn’t it!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOO NOT A FUCKIN’ CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!
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BONUS CREDIT SCENE
wtf is this man doin’
not him making some raggedy daggedy shield and painting it to look like the real one!?!
See Ik JOHN was gonna reach his fuckin’ breaking point...
I bet SAM and JOHN are probably gonna duke it out, one on one, in the last episode!
wait a minute... ain’t his arm still fucked up??
_______
I’ll tell you what I really don’t want this show to end but I understand what Marvel is trying to do in their universe but god this a good fuckin’ series! Unfortunately, my next tfatws post will be the last but boy was it worth the ride! If I don’t know anything I know this... we better not and I mean WE BETTER NOT run up Chris Evan’s Clint Eastwood in this last episode iykwis LOL. Until that time comes, remember everyone’s a critic when their opinion matters the least. 
Here’s a link to past and future episodes:
EP1 - EP2 - EP3 - EP4 - EP5 - EP6
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jaeminlore · 4 years ago
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bard!taeil ^_^
commissioned by @warmau luv u thank you for giving me free reign i’m sorry i used it all on world building
words: 5k+
a/n: sorry this is a bit late ! also for any mistakes !
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okay first thought when given free reign of a story is PRINCE or ROYAL bc that is where my mind is for every story i love a good castle moment
i just think they’re neat ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
but yknow i was thinking about bards and also my skyrim game and how annoying yet precious the bards are in the inn. and if that is not taeil i will eat my own foot,,,,, like omg i forgot his name i think it’s mikael?? he’s at the inn in riften!!! i beat him up to preserve the honor of some lady and now we’re best friends ^_^ anyways he’s lovable and it makes me think of taeil
i miss taeil i read a post about how precious he is and it made me feel some type of way ,,,,, my favorite taeil era was cherry bomb bc the CHOKER and the EYELINER and he just felt like the embodiment of that tiktok sparkly filter
okay now that that’s over
this story is set in a lone kingdom called intima,,,, intima is a word meaning the heart of something and it’s where the word intimacy comes from and it makes me feel warm and happy so i assume it will make the people of intima happy too !!!!! it’s an island centered around the sun — and YOU my dear reader are the eldest princess, the first before six younger siblings !!!
as the oldest, the throne is in your future, and you are set to be the reigning queen WHICH you are quite excited about this isn’t one of those aus where you hate your kingdom and your job and serving,, you LOVE your people and your culture and you genuinely can’t wait to become queen
i’m going to set the world!!!! bc world-building gives me endorphins >.>
intima is a HEAVILY floral-filled island. the clivia (or bush lily) is the capitol flower, often associated with patriotism or pride for intima as an island!!! it’s the flower people pin to their chest during coronations or royal festivals!! and the yellow/orange/coral shades are often what you and your siblings wear to represent yourselves and your island.
intima is a land of equality!!! bc i said so!! and also because the culture is purely built on gratitude and kindness ,,,,, i like to think the spirituality or “religion” in the culture is the worship of the sun and the warmth it brings,,,, a sort of serving the thing that shines a path for the hopeless!!!! there are hundreds of poems and legends and songs about the sun and who she once was and why she blesses intima with her harvests and all kinds of other things and i do have the time to get into it but i know all of you do not
intima also believes that art is hard work!!! and it’s one of the most respected jobs there are!!! like a busker or a street painter are often praised and it’s expected of islanders to tip them and stay to praise them a bit!!! and usually they’ll sell their art (if that’s what they made) afterwards!!!! and poets will read for the children and adults alike and they’ll sell their services to like,,, people who struggle to put their words down on paper and it’s all very helpful and lovely
farmers and fishermen are well respected as well!!!! ofc they bring the food in and the vendors at the marketplace sell them while the artists keep entertainment going. it’s a lovely system and often as the seasons change people will shift their jobs so a vendor will decide to create for a season or a fisherman may decide he wants to sell wares,,, it’s a system so that people can enjoy where they are as well as express they’re creativity properly
and the wealth is distributed equally so that no one goes hungry!!! everyone helps each other out to find a job that fits them!!! and not many people take advantage of the system because it’s quite shameful to refuse helping your fellow neighbor
so yes!!! kindness and helping each other out is not only expected but it is often an indicator of how respected you are as a member of society
ungrateful people get the shame cone >:(
the island is HUGE and set in a sort of jagged star shape, with villages and markets surrounding the castle itself!!! and there’s a moat surrounding the castle made from the streams that trail in from the sea ,,,, and the harbors are quite beautiful if you stand atop the castle walls you can see the ships come and go and it is just *chef’s kiss* immaculate
and the moat is so beautiful i can just imagine the ferns!! like palm brush ferns and tiger lilies and birds of paradise just lining either side of the moat,,, so pretty :( and the moat isn’t to keep people out!!! it’s actually a natural pool for the villagers when it gets too hot :)!! but otherwise the drawbridge is always down so people can come and go throughout the courtyards
similarly, the castle walls run down the island as main roads, leading to the actual castle where the main courtyard sits.
you and your siblings are very personal with your subjects, and it’s not uncommon for the princes and princesses to walk hand in hand with those of a lower class than them,,,, esp bc there isn’t really a class system in place. since wealth is evenly distributed,,,, it’s evenly distributed to the royals as well, and everyone lives comfortably. the only added expense are gifts!!! so if there’s a birthday or something more wealth might be offered to the recipients by default
the courtyards!!! are so beautiful!!! there are four in total but the one i want to focus on is the coronation courtyard!!! this is the courtyard where the coronations and celebrations are held!!!
but when there aren’t any coronations, it’s where people hang out to have picnics or sell their wares or tell stories!!!
and this is where we see taeil!!!!
every day our hero brings his life and ~sings~ a different story to whoever happens to be walking by. he’s actually hugely popular with many of intima’s people,,,, mostly because his voice is like HONEY and his smile reminds everyone of home
he has like,,,,, kind big brother who only comes home for thanksgiving but each time is more memory-filled than the last energy ,,,,, anyways
you don’t actually notice him at first!!! because usually he isn’t in the coronation courtyard.
also you’re too busy planning your OWN coronation
#queenshit and all you know the vibes
it actually isn’t until yuta points out that there is a “very tiny man singing about how beautiful you are” in the courtyard that you’re actually like,,,, okay,,,,,, interesting..?
and at first you’re like shut up yuta i’m trying to work on seating placements you know ten from iacto can’t sit beside donghyuck from stella or they’ll start a prank war during MY coronation
also there are a lot of people who write songs about you and your siblings that’s just how the vibes are !!!!!
you and your siblings are known for your beauty and kindness, so many creatives often use y’all as muses
so you just brush it off
and go back to your planning
which actually consists of you begging your advisors to make little goodie bags for everyone on the entire island (they WILL eventually agree because who doesn’t want a small bee charm necklace or some cleansing crystals)
but i digress
it’s not until you visit the courtyard to finalize the seating arrangements that you actually see the man your brother was talking about
at first you don’t even realize it’s the same person
sure, this man is short, but he is nothing like the unattractie picture you painted in your mind. not that short men are unattractive, but most men who hit on you are often uhhhh creepy and old bc intima is a beautiful place but men are still a disease
this man is, dare you say it, handsome.
like prettily handsome
his hair is a warm chestnut that falls over his eyebrows in loose curls. strands curl and bend around his ears and his eyes are lined with what seems like kohl
his lips are pursed, and he’s too far away for you to hear him, but he seems to be singing
you tear your eyes away from his coral-colored jerkin and try to focus on the seating arrangements
in the end, you leave the work to your advisors, choosing to break away and listen to the lonesome bard
and just IMAGINE for a moment taeil singing like real people do by hozier
just taeil singing any hozier song i cannot get over the thought of it >_>
those are the vibes for this story
taeil a sexy irish bog man
not really but i’ll bookmark the idea for later !!!!
okay so imagine him singing real people do or sunshine and it’s so gentle and warm coming from his mouth that you’re entranced at the very start of it,,,, you’ve heard tales of sirens luring sailors into the sea,,, and they’ve always sounded quite far fetched but now that you’re hearing taeil’s voice you’re like,,,,,, maybe it’s possible
you sidle up to another listener and ask for his name
“taeil moon”
it’s a befitting name. you run it over your tongue for a good while until it feels familiar,,, and when the song is finally over, you clap and shout a few praises, thinking your voice would get caught in the crowd
but taeil catches your gaze, and he strums a sour note on his lute. it’s a swift apology and an even swifter exit as he leaves the courtyard.
you watch him go, unsure as to why he seemed so uncomfortable knowing you were there. “is he alright?” you ask the same listener who told you taeil’s name. they answer, “he’s never left a set before. perhaps you frightened him, princess.”
you DID frighten him. moving into taeil’s point of view, the man has been declaring his infatuation with you for months now and you’ve never come to listen. he suddenly feels naked and vulnerable,,, the one person he chose to write songs about is the future queen and he could very well be executed for such unauthorized poetry
(as if executing is something intima didn’t outlaw ages ago)
so taeil is just a tiny bit dramatic, and he clings to the honest hope that you came to his show late and didn’t hear his declaration. his “all my love songs of now and forever after are for the princess y/n” that he starts every set with. he feels like a fool, so he finds himself hiding in the royal gardens, far behind the brush and hedges, where a lone forgotten fountain rusts. still water bubbles out of the spout, but there isn’t enough for the fountain to actually flow, so it just makes an incredibly awkward gurgling sound as taeil strums his lute and tries to collect his thoughts
taeil doesn’t just like you because you’re the princess. it goes so much deeper than that; he has one faint memory of his graduation out of bards college (it’s a thing in skyrim so it’s a thing in my au) and it consists of you meeting with all of the graduates and giving them each a bush lily from your own personal garden,,,,,,, you also wrote everyone a handwritten letter addressing them by name !!!!!!!!!
and it’s not much to go by at all, and taeil would feel incredibly foolish even bringing up the memory, or the fact that he keeps the card in his memeriy box,,,,, because it’s obvious that you don’t remember him from it, but he can still remember the color of your eyes up close, and he knows what it feels like to be on the receiving end of your smile,, and just the memory of your fingers grazing his when you handed him the flower and card makes his cheeks warm with childlike fondness
he’s a fool, he knows. he’s also a coward, because he ran at the very sight of you
“you ran off before i could tell you how lovely your voice is.”
taeil falls into the rusting fountain as soon as you round the hedge. he has no idea how you managed to find him, but he can’t really think much about it because he’s soon coughing and shivering from the cold and dirty water he’s just fallen into. he mourns his lute,,,,,, just floating in the shallow water ,,,,,, it’s not dead it’s just wet :/
“oh dear i’m so sorry!” you grab his hand and help him out of the fountain, wincing at the way his clothes cling to his body. (Wait. wait. taeil’s lil baby tummy.... through the sheer shirt,,,,,,, like after he takes off his jerkin to dry it out :(((( omg he’s so cute) “i just wanted to compliment you.”
“thank you, princess,” taeil manages to get out. he paints a smile on his face even though he feels like he’s never been put in a more awkward situation. “it means a lot, honestly.” he decides to avoid the topic of having a crush on you, because he thinks he has experienced plenty of embarrassing moments today, thank you very much. so he changes the topic completely. “good luck, uh, on your coronation. i’m looking forward to it.”
you lower yourself into a mock curtsy. “why thank you. save me a dance during the after party, won’t you?”
taeil nods, not trusting himself to speak, and you bid him goodbye
y’all know taeil’s face where he’s just cheesin. like :D
that’s his face for the rest of the day. and every day up until the coronation !!!!!!
and you visit him!!!! when you can !!!!!!!!
taeil has a very easygoing personality i feel like after the initial awkwardness he’d actually be the one to initiate a friendship!!! like sometimes he leaves you letters by the old fountain !!!!!! :((((
and taeil’s letters are very friendly but every once in awhile he’ll slip in song lyrics that make your heart flutter!!!! just imagine your favorite love song or folk song written out by taeil to you because he learned it and it made him think of you :(( i’m crying and i know you’re crying
one day you have a picnic!!!!!!!!! and it’s just the two of you and taeil thinks he should be nervous but he genuinely does enjoy your company,,,,, and he kinda sort of slowly starts to think of you less as a muse and more as a friend,,,,,, or even maybe a potential ,,,,,,,,, l o v e r oooohhhhhhhh,,,, omg it’s so cute tho he lays out a blanket in front of the fountain and the two of you eat sandwiches and apple juice and :(( eventually the sun makes you both a lil tired so you fall asleep side by side
and you get kind of flustered when you wake up beside taeil like oh 😳 okay 😳 now 😳
the two of you hang around each other in secret. not because it’s against the law or it would be publicized or anything like that,,,, intima is a very casual island and no one would bother the two of you too much,,,,,,,,, but taeil feels like a little secret you aren’t sure you want to share ,,, also your brothers and sisters would tease you relentlessly for giving your time to someone KNOWN for singing love songs about you
your friendship w taeil feels a bit like a bird feather on a windy day,,,,,,, like one hesitant breath could blow him away,,,,,,,, but taeil is so FUNNY and warm and gentle and COMFORTABLE that you slowly start to feel yourself fall for him.
taeil is a story-telling bard in the way that the songs he sings often tell stories of his life or the life of someone famous, installed in their hearts from the moment they were all in elementary school. like imagine him singing a tale about the greek gods or norse mythology or perhaps he goes and bit more fairytale and songs of thumbalina or sleeping beauty
he’s an amazing storyteller, so much so that when the two of you hang out, he often recites some form of verse to you, especially if it’s a legend you love dearly (SIRENS) ,,,,,, but the one thing that kind of irritates you is that he has yet to sing you one of his legendary songs that are “supposedly” for you
you’re not trying to be prideful, but this is the lovely singer everyone has told you about, and you still haven’t heard any of his original songs. or at least, his original songs dedicated to you. you’re very curious to see what you look like in taeil’s eyes, even though it might make you feel horribly vulnerable.
and taeil is like :) obviously :) i’m not going to sing love songs :) about my crush :) to my crush :)
but it’s whatever.
what i want to talk about is the coronation babey !!!!!!!!!!!
it’s very public,,, in the middle of the courtyard,,, and all the market stalls are up selling their wares to the large crowd!!!!! and kids are playing in the moat !!!!! sort of a summer festival and you’re the main event lol. like some people will gather and watch the coronation and some people will be off dancing on the other side of the courtyard but everyone is celebrating the same thing!!
and this is a high fantasy setting so there aren’t any modern things like microphones or speakers aside from a copper horn or smth ,,, but it’s all very fun and festive!!!!
merchants are selling banners of orange and gold,,, yellow roses and tiger lilies,,,,,,, flower crowns and faux scepters for the little kids!!!!!! and there’s lively music for people to dance and celebrate to,,,,,, and can you guess who is in charge of the music !!!!?! TAEIL
he’s got an entire band leading the courtyard and it’s all traditional songs for the most part of taeil is able to slip in a few love songs now and again. and ofc everyone loves them bc they know taeil and OBV it’s hard to hate taeil
but :( you aren’t really focusing on the music since it’s such a big day for you but if you were you’d know that taeil is singing his original songs :((( all the love songs about you,,,,,,,,,,
and i SWEAR i can imagine taeil singing hozier-esque songs..... omg or like mystery of love ,,,,, imagine him singing mystery of love on one side of the courtyard while you’re getting crowned queen on the other side
that image is something that can be so personal to me ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
:(((( and you’re dressed in a tan and peach maiden dress,,,, cloaked in golden silk with day lilies tucked in your hair,,,,,,,,, omg or BRAIDED into your hair,,,,,, you just look like a sun goddess okay golden by harry styles are the vibes ALRIGHT babes,,,, and there’s a speech to be made and someone made cake for the masses,,, so you get a bit caught up it everything
taeil isn’t really in the crowd for the coronation as i already stated before ,,,,, but he can kind of hear everything that’s happening and it makes him just smile to himself as he messes with his lute :((( omg if you guys haven’t heard you are gold by the national parks THATS the song taeil sings as the celebrations are dying down
and all the street lanterns are lit and people are quieting down and eating or chatting or rounding up their kids for bedtime !! omg little kids racing past and giggling, their flower crowns askew as they shout about becoming a queen one day :( that’s so cute esp to imagine taeil watching them fondling and waving at them as they pass
and there are fireflies all around!!!! lighting the pathway!!! it’s just so cute and soft and lovely think tangled at last i see the light scene OKAY except it’s not on water it’s a festival and it’s beautiful every seems to be glowing in the light
this au is partially inspired by tangled,,, or the kingdom of corona (lol) so
anyways back to you are gold
the chorus is as so: “you are gold / you are all i see / you are aurum scarce and meant for kings / and i will wait if it’s time you need / what i see in you i hope you find in me.”
and can’t you just SEE taeil singing that absentmindedly not really knowing that you’re making your way to him and then he just looks up during the final chords and he just,,,,,,, fumbles the music and his voice cracks a little (but how COULDNT it bc you’re so beautiful and angelic and taeil could easily picture the stars against your skin and in the shade of your eyes)
“h-hi,” he stutters. “you look. nice.” :D
i think taeil is pretty confident with his feelings but i also feel like he can be quite clumsy with them as well. if that makes sense. but on the other hand confessing to the now-queen of your island is a bit much and taeil isn’t really ready to be rejected on a regal level.
“thank you,” you say. AND!!! you can feel your cheeks get hot because taeil is quite handsome and you DEFINITELY heard the last few lyrics of the song and it ignited feelings inside of you that you weren’t sure you’ve felt much of before.
you kind of just want to take his hand and go spend some ~ alone time ~ with him ^_^
“you know,” you sit down beside him and wrap your cloak around yourself. “everyone has been telling me that you’re quite famous for dedicating your love songs to me. how come i haven’t heard such declarations?”
taeil’s ears turn red and he smiles down at the lute in his lap. “isn’t it a bit disrespectful to make you listen to all the songs i write for you?”
“i want to hear them!! genuinely!!”
can you just IMAGINE taeil holding eye contact and singing sunshine by hozier >:( or like ANY song by ray montangue for today we’re pretending taeil wrote all of these
hold you in my arms by ray montangue YOO :((
just taeil strumming and singing sort of under his breath because he doesn’t really want anyone else to share this lil moment with you. and he’s so sweet like i imagine after he sings he doesn’t expect any praise and he certainly doesn’t expect you to confess your love or anything like that
bc taeil is a respectful future king
LIKE JUST IMAGINE kind of grabbing his face and just giving him a lil kiss,,,,, a lil smooch,,,,, if you will
taeil is probably rlly pretty just after being kissed like his eyelashes would flutter so prettily and it would be so soft like he’d just press his forehead against yours and then omg a FOREHEAD KISS like a really gentle one
you would be so important to taeil like i think he would just be so gentle with you in every way
the relationship is a slower one,,,,,, you have queenly duties and he’s still working as a busker,,,,, getting ready to help the merchants in the winter,,,,,,,
but the two of you make time. it’s similar to before, you just set up picnics, or sometimes you watch him sing, and he’ll write you love songs and send them to you through a letter,, stamping with purple wax,,,
and taeil is always so sweet :( i think he’s more of a casual lover in the sense that he doesn’t need pda or loud declarations in order to make you feel loved flashback to him dedicating every love song to you in the middle of the square but he’d be the type to just hold your hand around the courtyard,, or he’d just send you soft smiles from the other side of the marketplace
he’s the time to buy you a basket of your favorite fruits and deliver them personally to your door
everyone in the castle just lets taeil into the chambers section at this point
the two of you will swim in the moat and play hopscotch with the village children or go shopping together or take naps beneath the afternoon sun and with taeil by your side it’s all so fond and precious and some times you’ll go days or weeks without seeing him just because of schedules but it’s never awkward when the two of you get back together
and it’s actually not until some of your very own villagers are coming up to you like hey,,,,, why haven’t you made taeil your partner yet?? he’s so precious and sweet and he would look lovely in a crown 👀👀
and uhhh who are you to argue with that lmao
so you buy taeil a ring
a pearl !!!! encased in silver <3333 i like to think that the tales he sang to you about sirens often slides to a pearl of some sorts,, so you make sure it’s the rock you place on the ring
and you take him back to that rusty old creaky old ugly old fountain :)
and you just,,,,,, ask him to marry you ,,,,,,,,,,
ofc taeil says yes, a bit frozen because the two of you have talked about marriage but only briefly,,, and he wasn’t sure you’d ever take that step so he didn’t want to pressure you
taeil ofc has always been ready,,, his soul is more open than yours if that makes sense !!! which isn’t a bad thing but he has definitely been ready for a lifetime with you for a long time now
and it’s a long-ish engagement i feel like
not that it really matters but it’s more of a betrothement !!!! so the two of you are technically already married even before the ceremony if that makes sense??? like everyone alludes to taeil as the consort and the two of you live together and receive gifts of betrothement and !!! it’s quite sweet and it’s the way they do things in intima
also you guys aren’t in a big hurry for another ceremony esp bc yuta’s coronation is coming up and you don’t want to take any of his spotlight
king!yuta hold up
but yeah taeil is a wonderful consort !! doesn’t do much yet politically bc he isn’t especially versed in politics but he’s learning!!! he’s really good at keeping a good energy in the room even if two ambassadors are fighting taeil will just be vibing like :-D and it often calms tensions
he’s just a GREAT person and a helpful ruler even tho he really doesn’t even have to be,,,, he’s just a consort,,,, but he still takes the effort to learn genuine laws and help guide the people
the people are obviously obsessed with him,,, they wouldn’t ask for another consort because he’s so kind with all of them
still sings in the courtyard as his job ,,, and the people love it just as much ^_^ esp because now all the songs are openly for you and about you and it makes people more fond of you as well
taeil creates y/n propaganda pass it on
but he works in the castle too,, and he’s a fast learner especially when it comes to settling arguements within the village or even within the court,,,, he also sets up festivals !! he’s wonderful at it !! genuinely !! taeil as an interior designer i can just see it man him designing flower arrangements and the setlist and just !! being a wonderful host
and tbh you’re very thankful because it’s nice to rule with siblings but it’s even nicer to rule with a soulmate
and taeil feels just like that — a soulmate, a missing piece of the puzzle,,,,,
and if intima is the sun , if you who rules it is the sun, then taeil is the moon,, and it’s quite obvious that the two of you were made for each other
perhaps in the future the two of you will have kids or adopt
or you guys get a puppy!!! i can see you w a puppy and taeil with a kitten and the two lil pets just follow you guys around omg
the two of you fix up the old fountain so it isn’t rusty or squeaky anymore
you guys find rocks out on the shore and create a new bed at the bottom of the fountain
and guess what!!!! you guys write little wishes on the rocks and invite everyone else to do the same with the idea that once the fountain is filled with wishes, you’ll hold a festival where you put the wishes back into the sea to be completed
omg how cute would that be like a yearly thing where the fountain would be filled with rocks and everyone gets a handful to take down to the beach and throw into the sea
it’s where lovers write their names and people confess to their crushes and anniversaries and birthdays are celebrated and it’s where artists write pictures and poets write verses and people write prayers to the sun
and it’s where you and taeil announce your first pregnancy >.<
and it’s really soft
the place between the sea and the sun is where your love lies
where your family lives
omg taeil singing lullabies to his baby :( HES be such a sweet dad
i feel like taeil already has a family just by his vibes yknow
but say it’s a daughter he’d teach her how to play the lute and he’d buy her her own
he’d let her express herself in any way and identify however she’d want and love whoever she wanted
he’d be an AMAZING father and husband and king
ANYWAYS to conclude
this was fun to write and i hope it made sense i know it’s all over the place but in conclusion taeil is sexy and deserves to be loved
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cherryonigiri · 4 years ago
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the retrospective: alice’s 1k special || lover masterlist
matchup requests: CLOSED
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Anon asked: Congrats on 1k! Your content is amazing and I love reading your stuff❤️🥺 Ok so here’s the matchup info: I’m an INTJ, Ravenclaw w/ Hawk patronus, I’m an ambivert, observant, patient, helpful & ambitious. Hobbies: playing piano, going on evening jogs, dancing hiphop, gaming, listening to classical/r&b music. Go to outfit: leggings & an oversized t-shirt or hoodie. Comfort over fashion for sure lol. Favourite beverage: Mango boba! N E WAYS i’m so proud of u & i hope u have a great day❤️ take care!
A/N: Thank you anon 🥺🥺🥺 omg i’m glad u enjoy my writing apiofjaiwpfji - omg how are you so talented I can barely play one instrument well lolol also I now crave mango boba -Alice
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Your matchup is: Kenma Kozume
How you met: You guys met online. One of your passion projects is the stream gameplay - and specifically you’re really good at rhythm games (courtesy of your natural sense of rhythm and beat you built from playing piano + dancing). You stream at night because that’s when you’re free, and one day someone recommends you to Kenma on one of his livestreams. He watches a few of your streams - he finds your reactions really funny - whenever you get stressed trying to clear a hard song/level or when you make comments about how you would have arranged the beat differently - he enjoys your sarcastic personality + paired with your dedication to clearing/playing games. He reaches out via DM and the two of you begin talking. You talk with each other upwards of half of a year before he thinks he might be catching feelings for you.
Your first date: He’s nervous about asking if you want to meet in person - even though both of you show your faces on stream, it’s different from talking online to actually meeting in person. The two of you frequently video call, but haven’t met in person. Also, since he’s a famous streamer, he doesn’t want to draw too much attention to himself when he’s out. One day on a video call, he seems a little nervous/withdrawn, so you ask him what’s up. He pauses for a bit, but you’re patient and understanding that he may have something a little more serious on his mind. After a moment, he asks if you want to meet him at a hole-in-the-wall coffee shop (recommended to him by Hinata, who says it’s hidden away so it’s harder for fans to find). You happily agree and he messages you the address. You don’t really think much of it, but at the end of the call it suddenly occurs to you to ask “is this a date?” Kenma’s a little blushy but he replies “yes” softly. The two of you have a nice chill coffee and he invites you over to his apartment for a games/movie night for the next date (KENMA IS SMOOTH)
Your first kiss: both of you are very patient people who would rather wait until both of you are ready before initiating any new kind of physical intimacy. I think your first kiss would be on the day/night you guys decide to make things official (not publicly, but between the two of you). I think it just comes up in conversation - the two of you were not in a rush to put a label on your relationship, but he asks if he can introduce you to his other friends as his girlfriend. It just happens, after you nod yes he leans forward on the couch to swiftly press a kiss on your lips and then your cheek. 
Anniversary: Kenma is so THOUGHTFUL - in the weeks before your anniversary he quietly observes what you’re browsing online - whether it’s online shops that he can purchase your gift from, or noticing which spotify playlists you’re looping when taking a shower/doing work. He silently catalogues all this information and tries to figure out what kind of gift you would appreciate. I mean we all know Kenma is super wealthy but I think if he bought you something expensive he’d buy it because he knows it means a lot to you or it’s something you’d use a lot! One thing I could see him getting is a set of matching gameboy terrarium/planters for the two of  you so you can both have them on your desks as a reminder of each other. (I found this on Etsy, wakuwakuisland does super cool recycling of old retro gameboy consoles by turning them into pokemon themed terrariums. I love these sm i put a photo of one and one day when I am not broke i WILL order/commission one). I think it ends up being a fancy dinner at home - and the two of you exchange gifts and spend the night cuddling on the couch while gaming. 
(A picture of the terrariums i mentioned:) 
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How they propose: So at this point his followers/your followers all know you two are dating so you guys will help with streaming/show up on each other’s streams. Under the guise of asking you to help him film something - he sneakily sets up his surprise. Ofc he still streams like normal, wanting to wait until the last moment and really make it a surprise, but as the game ends he asks if you can go grab him a glass of water from the kitchen. So you pad over to the kitchen, he quickly pulls the ringbox out of his pocket and ends his stream. When you come back he’s already standing in the middle of the room with the box open - silver band glimmering. You drop the glass of water in shock and start crying and nodding and he gives you the SOFTEST hug and the two of you just stand there for a few minutes hugging. (And then you go grab the paper towels bc yes there is water all over the carpet RIP)
What your wedding looks like: small, private ceremony. Probably in a remote chapel somewhere outside of the city. Kenma and you both wanted a day where you could focus on each other without all the hustle/bustle and distractions from the city + you didn’t want the press showing up or nosy people in general. Since Hinata is from a more rural area of Sendai, he suggests a local venue to Kenma who gladly takes him up on his offer, since a bunch of the people he wants to invite are from the area anyways. The wedding is filled with lots of laughter and joy, and just in general it feels good to be surrounded with all the closest people in your life. Ok but also for your honeymoon he takes a full 2 month hiatus and travels the world with you - wherever you want to go you’ll visit. 
Newlywed/domestic hc: Towards the end of the giant honeymoon trip around the world the two of you start to miss home. So when you finally arrive back at your shared apartment (you moved all your belongings in the week before the wedding) it’s the most wonderful sense of relief and wonder ever. It’s like you’re reliving your firsts all over again - your first time going grocery shopping together, your first time cooking dinner together, first time in a while doing a stream together, first time falling asleep in your full sized bed together. After months of travelling, it just feels good to be home again and to be able to revel in the fact that you’re married.
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mogwaei · 4 years ago
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Wolf Statues and the Tower of Bone tinfoil!
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A theory about wolf statues crossed my dash again which...got me thinking along a somewhat separate train of thought of all the different places we find them. I’ve seen the posts about the Dales/Exalted Plains, but not much about somewhere like Emprise du Lion. I’m not sure if this has already been talked about, but I’ve been searching and can’t find any posts elsewhere.
This is going to be a long and rambling post about Wolf statues and Emprise du Lion, so a two in one theory 😂. I’ve never actually written a meta and I generally hoard my theories and write them in fic...because I’m not good at writing anything that isn’t in story format. You’ve been warned lol
First, some really long and tangential exposition about statues.
There are a ton of Wolf statues across the game. We’ve got a whole pack of them across the Exalted Plains watching over various locations. But they’re also located in a lot of the elven temples we run across as well. @serial-chillr​ and I were talking about the possibility that, assuming the Wolves are all Fen’Harel statues (unless the ones in the Dales are Emerald Knight wolves, but I kinda doubt that), then what is the likelihood of Solas himself having built these statues?
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We know from Solas himself that elvhen nobility used to mark their slaves to honour the ‘god’ that they subscribed to. Sooo, why wouldn’t the more zealous ones build great big monuments in addition to marking their slaves?
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What I fail to see mentioned in a lot of fics and theories is much mention of these nobles or the politics of Elvhenan. I’m sure that higher ranking elves probably owned land within Evanuris territory, and they probably needed permission before doing so, but I’ll bet that if a kiss-ass noble came up to one of the gods asking to build a pretty statue (hoping for bonus points) the narcissistic bastard god was probably like “You want to build a statue of moi? BUT OF COURSE!!!” and maybe gave the noble a pat on the head and a cookie for kissing butt.
For posterity:
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That being said, because I can’t help but mention my own worldbuilding fic, The Guardian, I’m assuming the statues were built of Fen’Harel, and while Solas might not have really approved (or maybe wasn’t even able to stop them from being constructed ‘nu stop I’m not a godddd‘) he would instead have found a way to use them to his advantage. I write that he begins placing statues where allies (both agents and freed slaves) can find them and follow them back to safe places marked for the Rebellion. I go into slightly more detail regarding these special wolves (how he would get statues into the temples/palaces of the Evanuris and how to distinguish them from regular ones) in a plot involving infiltration of a compound in Chapters 111-120. I can’t give away all my secrets!
Anyway, moving onto statues in specific locations:
The one in Emprise du Lion
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hewwoh big boi
What I find fascinating about this one specifically is that it’s also located in the same region as Suledin Keep (which also has wolfies inside of it ofc). Because of the landmarks codex in Emprise I’m hedging that this land used to belong to Elgar’nan. Look at Pools of the Sun for reference - THAT’S ALL I GOT FOR NOW
Anyhow, floundering, but my attention was next drawn to the Tower of Bone
In this story, a blood mage summoned a greater pride demon,  who then possessed the entire tower. When the mage died, his sons were  unable to control the demon, so they commissioned eight monstrous iron  chains intended to hold it. The touch of the cold iron chain is the only  thing holding the stone abomination in place. Should they break, the  tower will pull itself off its foundations and walk, destroying  everything in its path.
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I know that they found human bones in the tower, but bear with me. I’m tinfoiling hard and trying to read deeper and tie it all together but I’m just a humble apostate hobo.
Anyway, some blood mage summoned a greater pride demon who in turn possesses the tower - of the companions, Solas has the Tower tarot card. The next sequence in the story, the sons bind the tower with 8 chains. The only mention I could find of the number 8 is in the Draconis codex where it mentions there being a possible 8th Old God being stricken from records.
Should all the chains break, the Tower will destroy everything in its path.
The Tower tarot, as we’ve seen in a hundred other tin foils, is commonly interpreted as meaning danger, crisis, destruction, and liberation. It is also associated with sudden unforseen change.  WHICH ISN’T NECESSARILY A BAD THING! (Look, despite everything, I’m hanging to that thread of hope that Solas will have a good ending).
So, again, I’m probably totally wrong but the symbolism here has some pretty interesting potential if it is referring at all to Solas and the Evanuris.
Recap:
>random thought (because I’m totally writing this on the fly) but IF the 8 chains  symbolise something more, then maybe it’s possible that the 8th ‘God’ could be the Sun that is briefly mentioned in elven legend (referring to the codex I mentioned above). And the Sun could be symbolism for yet another thing we aren’t aware of. Whether that’s some sort of dragon or spirit or entity we haven’t been introduced to in game (yet).
>The chains themselves could also be representative of holding back...again, something we don’t know. Blight? Something worse? (thinking about the Dread Wolf Rises mural and the seals, but there are only 7 there. Maybe the 8th is the thing they’re holding prisoner if it isn’t free?) ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
>While I’m down this rabbit hole, maybe the 8th is part of this: “A final eluvian is situated in a peaceful bolt-hole where Solas has painted murals. Fen’Harel was here and wanted to make sure nobody ever found what the other gods were doing.” - this can be found in the game files under bolt_hole (in other words, maybe it has to do with whatever they found?)
>A big ass, greater Pride demon (more Sooooolllasss symbolism? looking at Tevinter Nights and some other cool theories on Dread Wolf - Pride demon connections)
>Reoccuring tower symbolism (does the little wolf Rook that Mark Darrah tweeted a while back count?)
>Breaking chains (liberation?)
>ALSO THE TOWER IS COVERED IN RED LYRIUM (AAAAAAAH)
>Someone’s gonna go wreak havoc when a Specific Thing Happens (*cough* Solas? *cough*)
I realise I flew off the handles here and I’m not sure if anyone is going to even be able to follow this tangent 😂
Anyway, that’s it for now until I think of something else. If you’re into a long winded fic of worldbuilding and lore weaving, check out The Guardian where I do a lot better job of putting my thoughts into words. I swear I’m not usually this scatterbrained and I spend a LOT of time weaving theories...that I then hoard like Smeagol. :3
As a closing message, I’d like to include this shot of my dear friend @schoute​ ‘s Piper Lavellan who doesn't know where the fuck she is.
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Thanks for reading and I apologise if you’ve lost any braincells in this thought spaghetti orz
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smol-and-grumpy · 5 years ago
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With All My Heart - P.01
This is the epilogue to Dear Dean.
Grant that I shall never seek so much to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, or to be loved as to love, with all my heart.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC (Jamie Blum)
Warnings: Flangst
WC: 2645
A/N: This is the first part to the epilogue. You might see some other parts because I can’t stop coming back to them whenever I’m inspired. As always, thank you @themoonandotherslikeit​ <3
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May 2nd, 1946
Hi Sammy,
I’m writing to you on the first page of the new notebook Jamie gifted me. 
She’d caught me scribbling notes on papers around the house-- habit I picked up while I was a prisoner in camp, I guess. I just feel like it’s the only way I can tell what’s really going on in my head. I’ve seen things, Sammy, and I’ve done things I’m not entirely proud of.
I remember there was a day when I woke up and my boots were gone. Apparently, if you don’t tie it to yourself at night, you will wake up without them. I’ve learned it the hard way. I spent a couple of days walking bare feet in the freezing cold. I almost lost a fucking toe, can you imagine? I can be thankful that I was an officer and didn’t have to work outside. I walked upon a dying soldier one day, his boots were still intact. I took it from him, Sammy. Of course I waited until he was gone. I still feel bad about it to this day, but those boots were the only thing that kept me from losing my feet. I tied them tightly around me ever since. I know you wouldn’t be proud of what I’ve done, but I just had to survive. I promised Jamie to come back and that promise was literally the only thing that kept me alive. 
You remember the feeling of hunger we had while Dad was gone for a long period of time? Where we barely had enough to get by and we ate cereal with water because milk was just too expensive? Now, take that and make it 10x worse. The feeling of hunger in camp is always present. There was not a day, an hour, a minute where I wasn’t hungry. You adjust through time, but the road from being hungry to your stomach feeling numb, that’s the worst. 
I don’t even know why I’m writing about camp because it’s basically the only thing I don’t want to be reminded of. Back to the notes, shall we?
There were a couple of notes around the house, that always started with Hi Sammy, but I’ve never gotten around to write more. I just couldn’t, Sam. I didn’t know what to write to you, since I know that you won’t ever get to read them anyway.
On my Birthday, Jamie had the wrapped up notebook in her hand and told me that she wants me to write down my thoughts. It should be some kind of therapy, she said. I know she’s right, but I just couldn’t start to write anything in it until today. 
Hope’s sleeping on my arm, by the way, so I’m scribbling in here one armed, hope you can still read it. I know that you won’t, but let us just pretend that you will, alright? 
I’m sitting in our study, that used to be Jamie’s old room. There’s a window by the desk, and I can see our garden from here. Jamie’s tending to some crops, leaving me to take care of little Hope. I still don’t know if I’m doing a good job with her, but Hope doesn’t complain, so I’ll take that as I’m doing alright. She’s almost a year now. Her Birthday is a couple of days away, and we invited people to come over. Trenton’s Mom is coming, and some neighbors with their kids. Jamie didn’t want that, though. She said Hope’s too little to know it anyway, but Jameson insisted. Maybe he thought that he could score it with one of the single moms, I don’t really know. 
I live in her house now, and her brother Jameson (who’s apparently is a real charmer with the ladies) is living with us. He’s a war veteran, too. He had lost a leg, but he’s cheerful as fuck. I built him a new room downstairs next to the living room, at least now he doesn’t have to sleep on a couch. He helped me build it, too. The two of us were working well into the night every night for two weeks. I also took care of Hope during that time because Jamie attended nursing school in the evenings. During the day, I found work in a nearby Garage. The owner liked me enough to promote me, can you imagine? Me, looking over 20 people? Yeah, you’d have a field day making fun of me.
I went back to clear our old house, Sammy. I took your belongings with me. I hope it’s okay that I kept some things that were hard for me to part with. I gave some of it to Jess. I’ve contacted her after I settled with Jamie. I couldn’t do it before, there was just too much going on and my leg was still in a cast. I’m sorry. She’s doing good, Sammy. Did you know that she too was pregnant? I guess it happened on that last furlong back to the states, huh? I don’t know if she told you or if you held back this big news from me until you were ready to tell, and frankly now, it doesn’t really matter anymore. She had a little boy, he has the same eyes as you. There was no doubt that it’s yours, Sammy. Congratulations! 
I felt so proud, but also sad that you’ll never get to see him, never get to see him grow up, and he’ll never know how wonderful you are. His name is Samuel Jr. by the way, but if it’s true that the dead are watching over us, you might have heard it from Jess already. She told me she prays to you every night. We keep in touch and we had them both here for Christmas. We talked about you most of the night (apart from Jim and Jack, Jamie’s brothers who didn’t make it back home). It’s good, Sammy. Don’t worry about us. I’ll promise to look out for Jess and little Sam. You have my word. That’s the least I can do.
Jamie is pregnant at the moment. We’re expecting twins in about a month and a half. I should have known that there were chances that we will end up with twins since Jamie herself is a twin and her mother and grandmothers both were twins. I’m scared, to be perfectly honest with you, Sam. Imagine me with two tiny babies. Yeah, that’s a really good joke, isn’t it? Except it isn’t a joke.. Jamie is freaking out, since her mother died in childbirth, she’s afraid that she’ll end up the same and has written a will and what not. I don’t really know how I can help her get over the fear, since my head is not really the right place for fucking rainbows. It doesn’t mean I don’t try, though. We talk a lot when we get a quiet moment in bed. Her head on my chest, painting figure eights on my skin. It’s good if the subject of the discussion wasn’t so dark.
The girl is fucking huge, by the way. That’s the reason we cleared out Jamie’s parents old room and bought a new, really big bed. There was no way we could have fit in the old bed they had, with Hope occasionally coming in to snuggle with us during the night. Next step would be to clear out Jim’s room. But we’re in no rush. It seems like Jamie needs time, and who am I if I don’t allow her the time she needs to grieve Seeing that I’m still writing to you, I’m not exactly the poster child for it, right? 
Should have seen us when we went furniture shopping for a new bed, Sammy. Jamie waltzed through the store, and I carried Hope around. I think we were in there for hours, and Jamie still hadn’t found a mattress she liked. I let her, even if my arms were numb from carrying Hope, but she’s carrying two babies, so who was I to complain, right? The salesman though, he was so sick of us, I could tell. He pulled me aside, asking if I had no say in this. I couldn’t help but laugh. Of course I didn’t have to help Jamie put him into place. I just told him that maybe he should think about women as something else than a homemaker, then maybe we wouldn’t want another salesman about now. We found another sales clerk, the only woman working in there. Mom would have been so proud. It wasn’t an expensive bed, so the commission for selling ain’t that big, but we sure will have to go back there a couple more times and he can be sure that we won’t be asking for him. So, there’s that.
Actually, the salesman asked me if my wife could maybe make up her mind because he could have sold three beds (at least) during that time. I was a little taken aback when he said wife, not gonna lie. I asked Jamie to marry me, I really did. Jameson offered to babysit when there was a fair last autumn. I didn’t have a ring because I kinda spent all my money l on the new room for Jameson and nursing school for Jamie. Plus I gave Jess some, to help her get by with the little one. I gave her your ring which they handed me after they went through your belongings. I was surprised it was still intact. You shielded it pretty good from the blast, Sam. I gave it to her anyway, said that you wanted to propose and as a symbol, she could keep it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Jess cry so hard. It’s good Sammy, I’m good with it. The ring was supposed to be hers. 
Anyway, I asked Jameson if it was okay for me to ask Jamie, because I was being polite and that’s what they do, right? Asking the dad’s? But since there’s only Jameson, I went along with it. Jameson just bent over laughing, asking me what took me so fucking long and honestly, I didn’t know. It was good as it was at first, but then I thought about Jamie writing to me once that Jim sent her the silk fabric of his reserve parachute so she could walk down the aisle in white silk. Yeah, I thought about that, and I knew that I had to because I wanted to see that, too. There’s no question that I love her though, so. 
We were at the fair, and I only had money for a toy ring. You know those from the gumball machines? It’s not romantic at all, I know, but I guess when you’ve been through war together, you can look past that. I got on one knee and she almost said yes. She was beginning to show already, and she said that even if she wanted to marry me, there’s no way the fabric Jim sent was enough to wrap around her so we kinda haven’t set the date yet, but it’ll be after the twins will be born. It kinda gave Jamie some hope and will to get through childbirth, I guess. I bought her gum later too, so there’s that. 
Cas stayed in Germany, but not for long if you were wondering. He went back into combat and was leading a battalion in Japan. I wrote to him regularly, because if someone deserves to come back it’s Cas. I was rooting for him. He came back, which I still don’t know how he pulled it off because I heard that 8 out of 10 people weren’t gonna return.
Remember Harvelle? He went back to France and married Lisa. He told me to come visit, but you know me, flying is not really my favorite. I guess I just need time, maybe someday we will. I know Jamie wants to. She wants to visit Jim and Jack, and I really wanna visit you, Sam. I really do. I hope one day I will be able to.
The war is now over, Sammy. Had been for about 6 months. We won, even if we’ve lost so much along the way.
How naïve were we to think that we’d get out of there alive? Remember, they prepared us pretty well, didn’t they? We thought it would be a piece of cake. Go in there, kill some Krauts, come out unscattered, and go home with a fat paycheck for the ‘service’. The moment I saw people being shot at when we got off the landing craft, I knew that this is no fucking piece of cake, and they’d been lying to us all along. But what could I do? You just have to keep on going, keep on fighting for a chance to somehow get back home. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t really fair to lie to us about how big it really was. It wasn’t really fair to let us think that we’d get to go home as soon as we did our deeds. It also wasn’t really fair to think that the war would be over by Chrsitmas and not handing out clothes to shield us from the cold. Nothing was fair, was it?
Well, some of us did get back, but we’ve all lost something in the war. Some a limb or two, some their hearts, and some did lose parts of themselves. We’re not the same person we went in as. We came out broken and bend. We can’t even get it fixed because nothing could fix what we’ve lost. 
There’s really nothing I could do other than carry on. I carry on for the ones who aren’t as lucky as me. The ones who won’t get to marry their loved ones, the ones who won’t get to see their children grow up, the ones who had their lives cut short, the ones who got their young adult lives stolen from them, most of all, Sammy, I carry on for you. I’m doing all the things you will never get to do, only because I know that you will come back and haunt me, maybe smack me over the head for being a jerk, if I don’t do it. I’ll do you proud, I promise. It’s the only thing I can do and think about. You were always the voice of reason, weren’t you? Even now if I have to think hard about doing something, there’s a voice in me asking “What would Sammy do? What would Sammy think? What would Sammy want me to do?” 
I miss you so much, Sam, you have no idea. If it wasn’t for Jamie, I don’t know if I’d be here. It’s her voice that guides me out of the dark whenever I wake up and think I’m still in Normandy. It’s her embrace that pulls me out of the water around me that threatens to drown me, whenever I have weird thoughts. It’s her, who carries me up to the bed whenever I look too far into a bottle because I can’t shut off the noises of shells exploding around me. I don’t think I even deserve her, but she’s an anchor to me and Jameson. I’m only a little sad that you guys never got a chance to meet, Sammy. If you did, I’d probably be too jealous of the bond you would have. No offense, but I’m greedy, and I want her to myself. I’m just being honest.
Hope’s awake, as you can see from the saliva smeared on the ink. I need to go get something into her belly.
I can’t believe how much I drifted off when all I wanted to say is Happy Birthday, little brother! I love you.
Dean
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@dean-winchesters-bacon​ @beautifulbowleggedangel​ @flamencodiva​ @weepingwillowphoenix​ @adoptdontshoppets​ @fangirl-and-medstudent-help​ @liwopanyaasss​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​
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scourgefrontiers · 6 years ago
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idk why i get this feelin like tumblr is kinda..dying?  like, my audience on here and stuff.  it feels like everyone’s moving to different sites or smth and my audience is growing more elsewhere (mostly twitter tbh)
i dont wanna abandon my tumblr b/c phantomtype is like. my brand.  but then again i have been building up a personality around my name, dan saiyan? so idk :/a like ive said it before but tumblr is the only place besides youtube where i have phantomtype as a username and its what i watermark all my stuff with lmao.  so if tumblr goes down then all my watermarks wont lead to anywhere and i’ll lose A TON of art.  i mean i have the originals saved ofc but i’ll lose the online versions that people can look at yknow?
if it comes down to it i will move to twitter b/c i feel like the community is better there for some reason.  i really dont want to though b/c i have so much built up on here u-u
i guess i just dont know what to do about my online art career at this point.  i made a website recently (go look at it) so ive moved my commission info to there and it has a portfolio with some of my favorite/best pieces so i feel like at least on tumblr its becoming kinda pointless? almost? IDK ive just been struggling lately
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mochidoodle · 6 years ago
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Houseki - 宝石
Since there’s been some curiosity about it lately, I’ve decided to officially introduce Houseki! Houseki is my original series made with the help of my faithful editor-in-chief @ukitakejuushiro​​​.
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It all began with my first D&D character, a half-elf druid named Eizan Shen whose backstory I fleshed out over the past year. The story takes place in the elf nation of Liang (Chinese: 亮), meaning “light/brightness.” I incorporated my Asian heritage into a fantasy, magic-filled world brimming with all the classic (and favorite) fantasy story tropes. Sky-high towers and mages and dragons...a mix modern fashion with ancient Chinese wardrobes...and a set of unique customs built on Asian foundations. (ok now I sound like a chef on Chopped😅)
This explanation ended up hella long, so the rest is under the cut! I’m so happy people are curious about Houseki. It’s the culmination of my love for drawing, world-building, and storytelling (and anime ofc lol). Hope y’all enjoy my first original story!
The Kingdom of Liang
The prosperous Kingdom of Liang is a country landlocked on three sides, facing the sea on its west coast. It’s ruled by an oligarchy-monarchy mishmash I’ve yet to totally work out and three big political factions I won’t delve into too much now. The important thing to know is Eizan’s wife, Saya, connects him to the nobility because she’s the niece of the king. Her entire backstory is a wild ride involving a dispute for the throne, “dishonoring” her clan, and finding a family for herself. 
For the most part, the main plot revolves Eizan and his job. If you’ve read MTNN by Matsui Yuusei, you’ll figure out exactly who inspired Eizan...in fact he’s kinda like a (slight) Pokemon evolution of my favorite MTNN character (lol oops...)
Anyway, for that reason, I gave Eizan a similar-ish job. (I’ll keep Eizan spoilers to a minimum here because the campaign I’m playing right now has yet to reveal his deets... but if asked, I’d be happy to give’em!) We follow his adventures and meet his best friend, Taizi (a human) and his brother-in-law, Chai (an aspiring mage). 
Due to a horrific 100-year-long war (appropriately named the 100 Year War), Liang experiences the aftereffects of rampant xenophobia. Nowadays, border relations are peaceful and the xenophobia is minimal, but the bitter aftertaste of intermittent racism and elf elitism remains. 
We get a dose of this in Taizi’s backstory — Taizi and his human family were immigrant beggars rejected by the locals until Eizan’s father offered them a home and helped them get back on their feet. Ever since then, Eizan and Taizi have been the best of friends, like brothers. 
Meanwhile, Chai, the snooty son of one of the biggest royals around, learns what it means to be the “non-elite.” He meets Taizi, his sister marries Eizan (a commoner and a half-blood), and he becomes a working apprentice at the local woodshop. His is a tale of self discovery, treating people with fairness, finding his own goals, and opening his worldview when he crosses paths with characters from all walks of life.
Jade
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One of the most important customs in Liang is the symbolism of jade. Jade is the most sacred stone, symbolizing a lifelong promise between two (or more) people. It is a vow of friendship, family, love, and loyalty. Jade is not to be gifted lightly. Royals tend to have a family and/or individual ring made of jade.
Most, if not all couples, will exchange unique jade pieces when they marry. I call it “Trade a Jade” (˚▽˚) For example, Eizan gave Saya her hair clip and she gave him a set of earrings. Sky gave Yuri a beautiful hair ornament, and she gave him jade chevron ear cuffs. (Couples do trade other items, but these happened to be similar gifts.)
Magic
The theory of magic in Liang is based off the number eight, representing harmony and balance. Mages use “anchors” to connect themselves to the natural energy of the world. While magic theory/technique may vary geographically, Liangese magic always utilizes eight anchors. A gate between the first seven anchors and the universe is established using your soul anchor (the eighth pillar, one’s own mana). The first seven are elemental anchors (fire, earth, water, etc) which draw power from the natural world. The stronger the mage, the purer the magic, meaning one can draw a greater quantity of power with a better connection.
Gemstones — houseki (宝石) — are used to enhance the channels established by anchors. Certain jewels even have elemental affinities. Stones with high purity resonate strongly and channel the best magic. 
Fun fact: If you take away the hat-shaped radical in the first character of Houseki, you get the word for “jade”...! 
Connecting to different anchors produces different spells. For example, combining several elements provides complex magics like telepathy and foresight. Using only one type of anchor creates create pure magic, such as straight up fire or water spells. However, magic is not produced out of thin air — it requires a trade of the user’s mana for the world’s energy. A spell’s strength still depends on the caliber of mage, not just what anchors they use.
Magic tools are very common. They use magic batteries made of gems/metal ores or simply rely on the user’s mana. Inscriptions and magic circles establish anchors if none are enchanted into the gems. High quality magic tools are made of metals with high magic compatibility. The more common items made from regular steel, stone, and glass include thoughtography radios, magic-infused cameras, and quartz crystal TVs.
Additionally, healing is possible by accessing life element anchors (found in your soul anchor or in organic objects) to summon sheer life force energy. Liangese healing magic is very advanced to the point where one can conduct brain and open-heart surgeries. However, the usage of certain magics is forbidden without qualification. Medicinal magic is limited to certified clerics, and alchemy is strictly prohibited unless you’ve graduated from the capital’s School of Alchemy. 
Note: Much sketchy underworld business revolves around black magic, illegal alchemy, and magic weapons trade.
Basic spells are taught in grade schools, but not everyone has strong magic affinity, so mastery isn’t a requirement. Most children continue on to a regular university, vocational school, or magic academy if they don’t enter a direct apprenticeship following primary education. Easy spells are frequently used in daily life to simplify tasks. For example, one can check the quality of materials or speed up certain processes using analysis/trace magic. Cooking magic is an entire art on its own, and very difficult to master.
There are laws banning time-altering magic and revival of the dead, but very few ever violate them. This is because these spells never end well. You can land in an eternal time loop or accidentally create a soulless, man-eating zombie. And then you die.  While spells that save someone on the brink of death in exchange for one’s own life force do exist, you cannot bring back the dead. 
There is only one exception to this, and even that singular instance required hundreds of years of research and preparation, not to mention the cost.
Finally, certain noble clans specialize in different magics, often attaining mastery of multiple disciplines. I’ll save that for a different post, but for now, just know that the Cheng Lis are primarily fire, alchemy, and space/time mages. Eizan is good with earth or plant-based spells (aka he has a great green thumb!)
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commissioned art by Ling
Plot (???)
The plot of Houseki is still a work in progress. I have a general outline that I keep adding to as more ideas come. I’m writing out the fine details/arcs, which will include the dark underbelly of the royal world, black magic, a threat to the nation, the secret to life (?), and the truth behind the throne. Love me my cliches hehe~
Here are some character facts you might find interesting! ...okay, yes, my cast is like 90% one royal family and I have terrible naming sense (I legit named Taizi after my fave badminton player) but here ya go!
MAIN CAST 
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Eizan Shen: A half-elf druid created for my first ever D&D campaign hosted by a friend! He’s a huge family man and an avid tea enthusiast. Very calm, levelheaded, and specializes in handling a knife...or many knives. (I don’t know where he keeps them...😨) Eizan gives off ultimate dad vibes and his most treasured thing in the world is his family.
Saya Shen: Eizan’s wife, a full elf born to one of the most powerful royal clans. She was supposed to be the first princess of Liang, but was disowned by her family when she rebelled from their ideals and married a commoner (and a half-blood, to boot). She’s an incredibly strong woman both mentally and physically, but also one of the warmest, most loving characters in the series. Oh, also her biceps are made of steel.
Chai Cheng Li: Saya’s little brother, a young mage prodigy who specializes in fire magic. He’s a tad snooty and arrogant, but at heart just a nerdy bookworm who loves magic. He grows up admiring his sister, feeling heartbroken when she “abandons” him and leaves the family, but later rediscovers himself and in his journey to become king. 
Taizi Ying: Eizan’s childhood friend. He and his family were immigrant beggars shunned by the locals until Eizan’s parents offered them a place to stay. After his parents died of illness, Taizi made it his life goal to repay the kindness that Eizan’s family showed him years ago. He becomes the greatest swordsman in the nation and earns great respect despite the human blood in his veins. 
Dae Ongaku: She is spunk in the form of a small elf girl, the one and only Dae. Head apprentice of the Shen Woodworking Company, her skills are nearly unrivaled. She’s known for her contagious smile, eccentric love of cheese, and her liveliness. It really isn’t a day without Dae Ongaku. (Character inspired and written by @ukitakejuushiro)
Sky Silvers: A cool and aloof elven ranger who befriends Eizan during our D&D campaign, later residing in the Shen household temporarily before he becomes a disciple of the greatest archer in Liangese history, Hanzhen Cheng Li. In the future timeline, Sky also ends up falling in love with Han’s daughter and marrying her. (Sky belongs to @ukitakejuushiro, and is her player in the campaign.)
Hanzhen Cheng Li: Youngest brother of the king and Saya’s uncle. Known far and wide as the One-Eyed Archer, Han is the strongest archer in all of Liangese history. He lost function of his left eye in the 100 Year War, hence his nickname. His wife passed away due to cancer, but thanks to my incredible plot armor (backed up by a decent magic theory), she will come back to life. They’re the cutest shit you’ll ever see, so I have absolutely no regrets. Best decision ever.
Yumiko Cheng Li: Han’s beloved wife, a cute little lady with a head of fluffy chestnut hair. She died approximately 75-85 years ago due to an incurable cancer, but I brought her back to life because Han was too lonely and I love her to bits. She is pure sunshine, the actual greatest good in this world.
Just look at this...how can you say no....
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Yuri Cheng Li: Daughter of Han and Yumiko. Like her parents before her, she is a skilled archer, and her personality is a perfect mix of the two. She has a passion for fashion, art, and teaching, but her emotionally tragic past hinders her confidence and her relationships. Fortunately, she meet someone who helps her becomes brave again, and fate aligns just right :’)
Hokuzhen Cheng Li: We should finally introduce the King of Liang himself, shouldn’t we? Cheerful and easygoing, Hoku is a kind and intelligent king. He’s very perceptive of the state of the nation, while also keeping up with “hip and cool” trends much to his daughter’s dismay. He can be somewhat clumsy, often tripping over his massive robes. A good man with one too many dad jokes...
Alishan Cheng Li: The Crown Princess of Liang, named after the literal Alishan mountain range of Taiwan. She’s Hoku’s daughter and Saya’s cousin. Ali is polite and well-mannered but not particularly adventurous or motivated. She knows for sure that she doesn’t want to inherit the throne. Oh, and she loves food (especially mantou) ♫
Bonus:
Wakamori Yakaze: A spirit mage from the western island country of Kouhaku. Yakaze is Sky’s first teacher and Han’s best friend. Though he doesn’t appear in Houseki’s main plot, he’s a main character in Han’s spinoff story, which will rejoin the final timeline of the main series. Yakaze’s tale is one of angst and hopelessness and his journey to someday becoming whole again. Personally, I believe his friendship with Han is unrivaled, far surpassing both love and life. Keep an eye out for him in YUMI TO YA —弓と矢  (Yakaze belongs to @ukitakejuushiro)
ANTAGONISTS
Yan Wu Seigi: A cunning mage who runs an underworld spy network. He is the head of the Seigi clan (and political faction), but his heinous actions in the 100 Year War dishonored his clan, and they were stripped of their status. His sly methods and ulterior motives drive the underlying plot behind Houseki.
Akagi Kanshikan: Yan Wu’s adopted son. Akagi lost his family to a house fire when he was young. He grows up a wild, obsessive, and unstable youth who craves social intimacy but doesn’t know how to achieve it. His love for violence and lifelong training as an assassin don’t help much either. He meets Eizan during their school years and plays a large role in one of the more devastating arcs. 
Jimo Kanshikan: Akagi’s younger sister, a small, emotionless, and cold assassin. Trained to be a killer since her formative years, she is fast and deadly...but somewhere deep inside, she wishes Yan Wu would show her fatherly approval and she seeks warmth from her sibling(s). 
Shanmu Seigi: Yan Wu’s only biological daughter, a wicked poison enchantress who adores mind games. She supports her father’s regime but also has an evil plan of her own. The shame of their clan drove her to mother to madness, and Shanmu’s hand in her mother’s demise explains why she has become so twisted. Shanmu is a recurring antagonist who cleverly slips beyond reach of the law.
Hayazhen Cheng Li: The eldest Cheng Li brother, Saya’s father, and formerly the Crown Prince of Liang. He was once a benevolent man to his loved ones, but after an unfortunate plot twist, he begins seeking vengeance in the form of cruelly grooming his heir. Hayazhen is a key national figure and maintains strong influence behind political tides. 
Asuka Cheng Li: Hayazhen’s wife, mother of Saya and Chai. She supports her husband’s endeavors regrets her inability to help Hayazhen make wiser choices. Instead, she blindly takes his side, thinking it was the only way to support him. 
Junzhen Cheng Li: A stingy, arrogant second Cheng Li brother. He’s just straight up mean and rude, no holds barred. But no one gives a damn about him either lol.
SUPPORTERS & FRIENDS
Setsuna Reifan: A renowned healer who spearheads the movement for workers’ rights and class equality. She becomes an important ally to the main cast. 
Ichirou Reifan: Setsuna’s son, a member of Eizan’s team. A really average joe. Pleasant to be around, but not very interesting.
Hyouka Tsaomei: A quiet, sweet girl who specializes in illusionary magic. She loves strawberries. Her name means strawberry. Will kill for strawberry shortcake. 
Qiuzhen Rin Koori: Magic forensic specialist who only likes three things in this world — coffee, candy, and sleep. It pains him to get out of his chair, and it’s near impossible to extract him from his magic lab. 
Old Nao: Headmaster of one of the military academies in the capital. A kind man, but also incredibly ancient.
Torisu Bia: One of the Ongaku Daily Sun’s best political journalists. Doesn’t sleep much, loves to write, and gets her nose into sticky situations every now and then. Uncovers a great conspiracy.
Osamu Raisan: A bard of the royal court who plays the shamisen. Something about him is particularly ethereal and all-knowing...
Maikku Shantian: Another bard of the royal court. He sings. Loudly. A very popular bard amongst the populace. 
Layla Zanabaq: A local florist in the capital’s most immigrant-populated town, where Eizan and Saya live. Has a huge crush on Maikku. (Inspired and created by @harunnn)
Shu’un & Ranshao: Two of Chai’s university friends. The first is a salty little mage who uses familiars, and the second is the token idiot who only knows how to use explosion magic.
Paiya Yoon: Dae’s childhood friend and rival. She moves into the capital when she finds a new job there, rekindling their competitive friendship. She’s named after a papaya. Yes, you heard me, a papaya. (Inspired by @kyahgamis​)
Rem: Sky’s eternally sleepy childhood friend. Even while holding a conversation, there is a 99% chance he is asleep. May or may not be a ninja, but you didn’t hear that from m—
Collie: An archery kouhai from Sky’s youth. She looks up to him a lot and she flaps her ears when she’s excited, as if she might try and fly away. Collie is often mistaken for a boy.
Ra: A very Extra™ healer who has 100% faith in his skills (as should you). He calls people by their full name all the time (a power move), doesn’t skimp on eyeliner, and has known Sky since his village days as well. (Rem, Collie, Ra by @ukitakejuushiro)
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FAMILY 
Ezi Shen: The plucky, curious daughter of Eizan and Saya! She adores the color pink and loves bows of all kinds: bow ties, ribbon bows, bow tie pasta, you name it! Ezi is quite the fearless little adventurer and one should consider it an honor to be invited to her weekly tea parties.
Daizan Shen: Eizan’s father, a master woodworker who owns the shop where Dae works. He’s a strict but fair man who earned great respect amongst fellow craftsmen with his hard work and skills. He and his wife serve as the liaisons between local mixed-race business and the corporate elf society. 
Meihua Shen: Eizan’s mother and Daizan’s wife. Though she was born to elite elven family, Meihua pursued her dream of being a seamstress. She now owns a beautiful dress and tailor shop. Despite being a pacifist, Meihua’s incredible intelligence was needed at the end of the 100 Year War, and she temporarily served as the head military strategist.
Tian Cheng Li: The only daughter of the previous king and sister to all of the Cheng Li brothers. Tian is an absolute riot who turns proper princess stereotypes on their heads. She is the root source of Saya’s spunky nature, the rebellious and boisterous Cheng Li aunt. 
Hayano and Irino Cheng Li: The notorious family twins, Tian’s youngest sons. They are the most chaotic duo of memes elves you’ll ever meet. They always have their hair dyed one wacky color or another. Lately it’s been orange (Hayano) and lavender (Irino). 
Hokkaia Hibari: Saya’s maternal grandmother, a very loving and tender woman who taught her grandchildren how to read and write. When the family dynamic turned sour, the children sought comfort in Hokkaia. She taught them to hope and dream :’) 
The Ongaku Family: Dae’s family of two fishermen, a navy boy, and the editor-in-chief of the Ongaku Daily Sun. They’re frequently so busy with work (coastal fishing, deployment, running the newspaper, etc) that they’re often absent from the household. As a result, Dae practically lives with the Shens nowadays.
Rei, Jun, & Maeno Cheng Li: The rest of Saya’s cousins. Rei is the oldest, an elegant but stiff woman. Underneath her guise of propriety, she seems lonely, like she just wants to have fun and be friends. Meanwhile, Jin is her stuck-up asshole of a little brother, a true snob. Don’t give Jin time of day, ever — it’ll get to his head. Finally, Maeno is the benevelent older bro of Tian’s twins. He has a soft, round stature and a warm smile.
Sei Ling Zhou: The former queen, mother of all the Cheng Li siblings, and the most renowned healer in history. She’s known for her quirky attitude and snarky clapbacks, having once turned down the proposal of the last king himself. Sei Ling will discover a never-before-seen spell that could very well be considered the “secret” of life...
Akira and Kawano Cheng Li: Akira is Junzhen’s wife and mother to Rei and Jin. She married into the family forcefully, desiring access to their magic libraries. Akira is not a stranger to getting what she wants. Kawano is Tian’s husband, a calm and steady man to balance out her spontaneity. He comes from a family that owns a fruit import company.
CUSTOMS
Jade: As mentioned before, the jade stone is the most precious and worshiped gem. Recklessly gifting jade would tarnish one’s reputation and belittle Liangese culture. Of course, they are understanding of mistakes, especially when foreigners are just learning about their customs.
Festivals: Liang has four big seasonal festivals — the Lantern Festival on the summer solstice, the Lunar Dance Festival in mid-autumn, the White Tiger Festival on the week of the new year, and the Jade Horse Festival on the spring equinox. People gather to pray to shrines, dance and sing, eat good food, and visit their families. 
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Tournaments: Similarly, Liang also has four seasonal tournaments called “Medals.” Winners of the Medals, appropriately called Medalists, are recognized as the greatest master in their respective fields. (Minor competitions also occur, but these are the big ones):
There is the Swordsmanship Medal, which lasts five days and ends on the summer equinox (the day the Lantern Festival begins).
The Ceremonial Dance Medal in mid-autumn, which perfectly coincides with the Lunar Dance Festival. 
The Archery Medal on the winter solstice.
And finally the Horsemanship Medal during the spring equinox.
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(all statistics are approximate and not quite final yet!)
Mastery of Arts: In Liang, mastery in any field (magic, arts, athletics, medicine, etc) is a very respected achievement. Oftentimes, masters are the older folks, hence why elders are held in high regard. An important plot point involves Taizi achieving mastery of the sword and winning the Swordsmanship Medal, defying classism and racism, and becoming one of the youngest and most respected masters of his generation. 
Market Day: A day-long event akin to an Asian night market or western farmers’ market. Shop owners, farmers, and restaurateurs gather in the central marketplaces of large and small cities alike to sell their specialty items. It’s a day to celebrate food and advertise your best goods! 
PLACES
Hisui: The capital. It has a circular layout and lies in the western central region of Liang. The Royal Palace sits at its center, hugged by a river that comes from the north. The Inner and Outer Capital are areas separated by the imaginary circle drawn by the river. This line divides the government and business sectors from the smaller residential districts.
Hayashi: Saya’s main hometown growing up. An industrial city slightly northeast of the capital.
Bing Harbor: Han’s city of residence in the northwestern province. It is Liang’s biggest port town, and thus the “gate” to the western world. Bing Harbor is known for its beautiful winter landscapes and seamless escape into vast forests.
Huamao: Eizan’s hometown, where he met Taizi. Known for its peaceful gorges, clear pools, and beautiful small cascades. 
Mountains: The mountain ranges surrounding Liang are classified into three different regions, each with their own specialty resources (i.e. mountain ore, lumber, etc). They are home to a few aboriginal clans. 
Huen: The southernmost Hisui district. It has the highest immigrant and non-elf population in the capital. This where Eizan currently lives. 
Haretsuki Lake: A large lake shaped like a crescent moon crashed into the sun. It lies in a valley to the southeast and has much historical relevance.
Here is a vague, incomplete map of Liang (still a really rough draft so far, and not quite the shape I want it to be...):
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As you can see, I have great naming sense (´∀`;) I either name on a whim or I throw in references to my family in some way or another... Anyway, I plan to change the shape and layout a bit. I’m not quite satisfied yet...
In conclusion... 
That...was a lot. If you made it this far, holy shit? Thank you?? Feel free to check out my Houseki tag and ask questions and just...please talk to me about my OCs omg I’m so excited ( ๑>ᴗ<๑ )
This is kinda my first big original “project.” I’ve always wanted to do something like this and I’m super excited to share it. Most of it’s on my personal docs or in chats with Danie, but I will share it all eventually! And I’ll update the (very unfinished) Houseki blog with all the formatting and plot, so stay tuned!
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idksheepthoughts · 7 years ago
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Conversations Me: you actually soft blocked me....                                   any reason why?
Her: lol the fact that you noticed this late   but it happened on accident actually and i went and unblocked               but at that point i was like lmao like she'll notice so i never mentioned it              
Me: If you hate me just say so. No need to lie.... I don't check shit like that every day but it's not that many days since I know it was maybe a week or less ... Whatever. I'm so splitting atm. So I'll shut up before I say something else             
Her: hate? when the fck did i mention that?         yes, better shut up before you stick your foot in your mouth as usual                 since i've done nothing hostile to you as if me feeling like i matter to no one and have the smallest amt of friends possible is somehow how an Attack on You.
Me: you blocked me... on "accident" how does that even happen.... i've told you tons of times that the amount of friends depends solely on yourself. and your willingness to talk to people and work past the anxiety and fear that talking to people causes. . . otherwise I wouldn't even have friends. because if i isolated and neveer talked to anyone ever first that nobody would talk to me in the first place. . . ugh whatever. i've said too much im just going to sober up and talk later i guess.... I can't always be here I try to be but like we said previously, i didn't know what to do between give you loads of attention and give you nothing at all...
Her: tumblr mobile? lol. if you can't believe me when i say that then i don't really want to talk to you since everytime i feel bad or have like, negative feelings regarding my own situations you always take it so personally (1) and then i have to dread these fcking conversations so when we've been talking normally on twitter                 it all goes to fcking shit because you can't accept that i get to feel bad and feel upset about stuff regardless of whether or not im taking actions to help myself in my own way at my own pace...doesn't mean you get to think that i hate you so i blocked you      because what the fuck how does it work when we've been chatting like everyday on twitter?                   and it was (what i thought) fine? good? (2) if it really was the case i wouldve blocked you here or just flat out deleted since then i'd only have one fucking follower :) so just. let me have emotions. and don't assume things. this is so funny because i remember you getting mad at me months ago for the same exact thing   and here we are, situations reversed  
Me: BECAUSE i have a huge fear of abandonment.... it was fine but this stuff even if its an accident just idk .... i guess you never saw how much abandonment even if its an accident sends me into depressive spirals??? have i ever left you no. i've been distant yes but i've never full on unfollowed or left... idk you block me a lot and delete and it hurts every time.                                    
Her: "even if" can you believe me????? first off???? (3) and no you havent god if it was such a problem just follow me and then ask me about it because why would i lie lol (4) i don't like friendships built on lies i'll never talk to someone like that genuinely   i have insecurities too. i have enough
Me: ok it was an accident.
Her: i didn't even think it was a problem first off considering all those people you put on your thanksgiving post. and then you never noticed/messaged me about so i was like k, so that's that! and just talked w/ you normally here  (5)           so let's just accept the fact that we've got our problems and there's better ways to handle this than assuming motives
Me: so you did change url because of that post??? like my paranoid ass thought???? i was right on that???? cause i noticed that and was like... maybe its not related but was it????? cause I just want to know... im not mad at that at all just... i want to not assume things atm.    and i notice stuff slowly because I try not to fall into obsessive traits. its not healthy to check who im following or who is greyed out or blocked every single day. . . I try to just let things be but when I do notice stuff i can't help but explode. I tried to be calm by just asking why.... but i clearly failed at that. its whatever. I followed back. if it happens again just like.. tell me please??? this stuff makes me so close to slitting my wrist                                    
Her: no, i changed my url because i was sitting on that url for a while and i wanted to use it              
Me: okay, it was just a paranoid thought.                             
Her: well, i really, really, really, don't like when you start assuming things even after i tell you or not believing me. we've been friends for how long? does it mean nothing? you'd think i'd lie at this point? x____x       (6) .those thoughts make me want to die      
Me: i'm sorry for thinking irrationally, but with how many people just up and leave, all the time even with being friends for long periods its hard not to jump to conclusions. I am in the wrong for falling into my own paranoid thoughts. You explained things and I don't believe that you are lying so its fine.                        
Her: oh, now you believe me                     after i have to hold your hand when i'm upset (7) whatever i'm probably not going to follow back because i hate that i have no friends and my mutuals ignore all my posts when i try to put myself out there     it's gotten to a point where i can't post stuff on tumblr anymore because i know no one gives a shit             like even as happy as i am about my commission i know if i post that on my tumblr i'll make the artist seem bad when no one likes my post  idc. i'm bitter and alone and probably always will be because i don't have any friends aside from you o/                           like, be grateful you even have that many people to be grateful for   (8)      i'd kill for it i feel like dying when i think about this and i think about it a lot     but ofc i don't moan about it anywhere except on this stupid fucking twitter account                   where you seem ot think i live a dandy life   (9)                                    it fcking sucks bc im trying my best!                                           anyways im done lol           oh and then you post shit like *Edit* (Screenshot of some tags where I said I always listen to people but nobody likes listening to me so I talk to my cats a lot which is true because I’m a burden and i hate bothering people with my problems so much)                    that when you damn well no i have no one else to listen to except you online      and we've been civil lately                         but ok! i guess i don't care!  because im living it up!       #sarcasm    (10)
Me: you havent followed me in probably over 10 or so months, whenever i remade, cause i don't think you followed me when i delteed either,  i didn't expect a follow back at all. i just expect us to be not mutuals but still friends? THEN TALK TO PEOPLE TALK TO PEOPLE AND TALK TO PEOOPLE thats all i did was work past my fears and talk to people and some stuck around some didn't. i dont know what else to say. some of those people haven't actually spoken to me in months either but im still grateful for them. I have nothing else to really advise on that other than you gotta put the talking in first. thats all i've done and its somehow managed to not fuck it up for this long??? i dont think i've had any friend longer than whenever we started being friends... so around 2 years...    
Her: no offense but just talking to people doesn't do shit :) but seriously, thanks :)       (Phone lagged) So I repeated my previous message by accident)                           
Her: yeah probably the only reason you havent fucked it up is because i dont want to be fucking alone and i dont give up easily so ive stayed with this even fi you make me feel like fucking shit when this happens   & since you said nothing to everything else i just said i guess im right :)             god im over this i dont want to fight and i dont want to talk to you becaus eim always explaining my problems and you just like. tell me the same shit each time as if it'll magically do stuff   liek the fact that im trying doesnt mean anything                 i dont wanna talk to you if its always going to be like this ill take the goddamn loss and be lonely while youve got your fucking harem of friends idc if its an exaggeration the point is everyone i considered a friend has just stopped talking to me completely and the only thing i get here is you telling me what to do like i need cold hard instructions for making a friend  
ME: Harem??? You know nothing about anything. Ya know what..... forget it. If it's better I don't say anything because nothing I says helps and  I'm a broken record. You want to assume because I tagged a lot of people doesn't mean I wasn't just fishing for validation. Me trying to help is just being a dumb mistake. I can't help anyone and why I try is also confusing because I am pointless. I'm keeping you in my note regardless you have been here and listened and that hadn't changed.  But if this is just going to explode it's going to explode. All I do is ruin everything and I don't even care anymore I'm going to buy a gun soon anyways. So what's the point in trying to make something work. I've always been a shit friend and it's just not worth it to you at this point. So okay.                   
Her: HERE let me qutoe for you something    "idc if its an exaggeration"                                      ^^^^^^^             unlike you im aware when im being irrational lmao    (11)     apparnetly you get to be and i dont                             thats how it always is            did you ever think about it feels for me   when my only friend does shit like this constantly    like lmao                                ofc not bc why would you consider anything from my point of view  this conversation is over until you want to stop fucking assuming i dont care       LOL     and acting as if me letting you go is the best thing that could happen to me       like we couldnt j ust talk on twitter and let it fucking be but you have todrag it all in at least i get to get stuff off my chest thats the only fucking good that comes out of this  like you dont get that you telling me the same thing hurts because it doesnt fucking work and i dont have any fucking friends  i have college to deal with and studies and that pressure but you dont know the half of it?    but you just want to assume, assume, assume   (12) i cried already out of anger    
Me: I didn't have friends in college either                                 
Her: big offense but i dont want to continue this conversation
ME: Okay
Her: unles syoure willing to admit to your bullshit       because ima lways doing that and im always getting the end of your shit      
Me: I am made of nothing but bullshit I'm nothing but a huge fucking shit storm and I always will be. You should have left a long time ago because I don't know how to not be toxic   It's not That I won't be upset by you leaving far from it but you deserved better people and maybe if you had left and kept trying as you have been things will turn around. Because literally everyone that has ever done that with me ended up fine and in a good spot. I hold people back. And that's all I can think of. I ruin other people's lives by being in it. And I've certainly made your life worse. And I'm just better off dead because I am a selfish fucking loser.     I'll shut up now.
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