#and again it'd be good acadmically but I'm really terrified about if I'll regret not going to Korea | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

riverfigs · 11 months ago

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I've been talking about this with literally everyone I know because I'm incapable of deciding but I can't decide what I'm gonna do for study abroad ACK

#like #my school has an agreement with another one and the forms for that are due on the 5th #and I didn't plan on going because it's right where I live and why would I go home?#but things have actually been pretty good at home and with my family and I feel mentally stable enough to be in my hometown #but for a whole semester? potentially #although I was getting testy after just a month but I was surrounded by and only saw my family and if I study here I'd be on campus w/frien #however since freshmen year of high school I've been wanting to go to Korea and learn Korean and learn about Korean culture #and this would be the perfect time to do this because when else am I gonna be able to dedicate time to just go to Korea and learn Korean?#like when else will I 'have' the money or the time to do this? it would feel like a shot in the foot to not go now #and also I rearranged my schedule and even ended up overloading last semester to get into the singular Korean spot that opened last minute #and I was so excited and i would tell everyone that I was going #but I went home and started thinking about the college back home and it has a lot more I could do academically than at my own university #and so now both are pretty good options #and I kinda wanna vomit sorta kinda not really #I think I can fill out the form and then take a few more months to think about it because I don't have to pay the deposit until end of june #but I'm also worried about what if I sign it and then am unable to back out and then I regret it and then I have to spend a whole semester #at this university back home in my hometown close to everyone and everything #and again it'd be good acadmically but I'm really terrified about if I'll regret not going to Korea #usually I'll make a decision and then think through if I regret it or not so hopefully something similar will happen here #but I'm also prone to regret even when I stand on my decisions so I'm unsure how to really tell what I'm thinking #I've been making lists and all of what I wrote here is on there plus some more #you guys I can't do this :(

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