#and I was like HAHA BRING ME MORE BEVERAGES LABORER

[thunderheadfred]

threads has figured out I'm pregnant, which is a nightmare, because now I'm getting Horrible Takes from instagram moms in my "for me" feed, like this one woman "balling" her eyes out because she got her first stretch mark. at week 35

and I'm like. what. how. did you never experience puberty? have you never gained weight unexpectedly? what's it like to experience the first stretchmark of your entire life while 35 weeks pregnant and to lose your mind over it because "your body will never be the same"

my love. things are about to happen during childbirth that may. uhhh. suprise you

[costellos]

a/n: the Crusaders have a very special place in my heart during the holidays. I finished Part 3 around this time last year, and things were a lil rough then. as a result, I wanted to focus on happier things for this year! so without further ado, here are ya fav globe-trotting boys and their fav holiday traditions.

tw: mentions of death and alcohol in Polnareff’s section.

❥ ┋ ❝ stardust crusaders & their favorite holiday traditions to do with you!

joseph joestar.

Joseph’s favorite holiday tradition is putting up Christmas lights.

the eldest Joestar is really obnoxious when it comes to holiday traditions. while he loves them all, he has a particular affinity for decking out his house in elaborate light displays. it brings him a lot of good memories from when Holly and Jotaro were still young.

that said, he has to get you involved in helping him. he pulls out the biggest boxes from storage and drops them at your feet. despite his being a literal millionaire, it feels very... suburban. not that you mind. you knew exactly what you were getting into when it came to Joseph. that childish zeal for everything keeps you on your toes, and while putting up lights may not be the most fun activity in the world, his boisterous laugh makes you think otherwise.

Joseph’s smiling ear-to-ear as you help him, especially when you set up an LED wire reindeer without his help. but nothing will top that toothy grin when you’re standing side-by-side, right in front of the house, and he plugs in the displays.

the house erupts into a flurry of colors ― blues, reds, whites, greens ― too many for you to count. that LED wire reindeer comes to life, with its head slowly rising and falling. and the trees, all laced with bulbs that mimic stars more than tacky lights from Home Depot, twinkle and dance to the displays around them. it’s beautiful. (and like him, a little obnoxious.)

you feel an arm wrap around your shoulder, pulling you to Joseph’s enormous figure. though his smile is unwavering, his gaze isn’t on the house in front of you. no, it’s on you yourself. for all the sweat and effort you both put into this, his attention still falls back to you. ↳ “haha! there you have it. you have a real knack for this, kiddo. couldn’t’ve done it without you. ...now let’s go back inside, I can’t feel my damn fingers...!” 

muhammad avdol.

Avdol’s favorite holiday tradition is drinking hot chocolate.

though he doesn’t celebrate Christmas, Avdol enjoys the traditions that come with it for you. his personal favorite is drinking something hot after a long day. Cairo may be in the desert, but it still gets quite chilly at night!

he usually opts for tea in the evening (masala chai being his favorite), but he’s starting to warm up to hot chocolate. while American hot chocolate is far too sweet for him, a pinch of cayenne pepper and a little cinnamon makes it more tolerable.

it’s become something of a challenge to get him to drink hot chocolate. it’s not his first choice. sure, he’ll still drink it if you offer, but you’re quick to notice that small grimace as he takes his first sip. you’ve taken it as a sign to make something delicious for him. so you go back to the basics: cayenne and cinnamon. considering Avdol’s distaste for overly sweet foods, you opt to make the beverage out of semi-sweet chocolate. mix it all together with some warm milk, add a cinnamon stick and some nutmeg at the top, and you’ve got the key to Avdol’s heart.

you place it proudly in front of him. this has to be it. you know him well enough to recognize his tastes. yet when he rests his mug against his lips, taking that first sip... you can’t read him. his features are still. 

truth be told, it’s exactly the kind of drink he’d love. damn. you nailed his tastes a little too well. but he's not going to admit defeat. seeing you try so hard to impress him in a desperate attempt to share your culture with him... it’s heartwarming. he doesn’t want it to end. so he sends you a click of his tongue, a sly grin, and the shake of his head. ↳ “it tastes much better, but I think something is missing... why don’t we try to find it together?”

jotaro kujo.

Jotaro’s favorite holiday tradition is eating Christmas cake.

Christmas cake is just a strawberry shortcake. it’s a simple dessert, something that most Japanese families eat around the holidays. Holly’s become a master at baking it. and while Jotaro doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth, he loves Christmas cake.

the only thing he loves more than Christmas cake is his family, though he’d never admit it outwardly. he has a lot of fond memories of eating Christmas cake right after dinner. sometimes if he behaved well enough Holly would sneak him a slice before then. even now he gets a warm feeling seeing all his favorite people together, sharing the fruits of Holly’s kitchen labors.

and because he’s dating you, you’re one of those people, too. the invite is casual; he makes it sound like you can come if you have nothing better to do. so of course you come. you show up at his house, smile in tow, eager to celebrate with him and his own family. (but let’s be real, Holly has adopted you as one of her own ― his family is as much as yours now.)

that same warm feeling creeps up on him as he watches you and Holly bake the cake. you look so happy here, so natural, as if you were always meant to be a part of this household. he won’t smile back at you. no, if you catch him staring, he’ll just dip his head and turn away. you know by now that he’s happy too, however.

when it comes time to eat, Jotaro won’t say anything. he’ll let his mom, Joseph, and Suzie Q do their little pre-feast speech, rambling some bullshit about tradition and midnight Mass. but when he looks back at you, standing there at his side, that warm feeling bubbles in his stomach once more. you belong here. this is where you’re meant to be: right here, with him, placed so perfectly within his own family. ↳ “hey. you know you can come back whenever. being surrounded by all this noise is actually tolerable when you’re here.”

noriaki kakyoin.

Kakyoin’s favorite holiday tradition is exchanging presents.

though his family isn’t Christian, Kakyoin fondly remembers his parents exchanging presents every year. small things, tiny trinkets and letters to express their love for one another. as such, he’s always wanted to celebrate it with someone special. he’d be lying if he said he hasn’t romanticized the holiday.

as such, he’s beyond excited to celebrate it with you. he tries to keep his cool about the whole affair, but his eyes are bright and he refuses to let go of your hand as he pulls you through the streets of Tokyo.

the city is decked out in all sorts of light displays, from hanging icicles to flashy LEDs. mascots line the streets delivering candy canes with advertisements for local restaurants. the smell of chocolate is evident throughout every street you turn on.

but the city is only part of it. a big part of the date, yes, but Kakyoin has the finale all planned out. he brings you to a shrine outside of the hustle and bustle. it’s a bit of a hike and it’s dimly lit, though you figure that’s why no one else is up here. he sits you down on a short bench, short enough for you to be sitting shoulder to shoulder, gazing down at the city below. that’s when he gives it to you:

it’s a small gold box wrapped with a red ribbon. fancy, you think to yourself. with his teasing you to just open it, though, you get to work pulling apart the red ribbon. you’re not sure what to expect. Kakyoin’s not one for brands, nor does he like anything flashy himself. had he gotten you something like that...? yet when you open the box, what stares back is a cassette tape. of course. he’s far more thoughtful than you gave him credit for. ↳ “clichéd, I know. but every time I hear any of these songs, all I can think of is you. I can, ah... I can play it for you when we get back.”

jean pierre polnareff.

Polnareff’s favorite holiday tradition is shopping for presents.

shopping for presents is a melancholy activity. it was a tradition he had with Sherry, to go about the nearest market and pick out the best gifts for their family and friends. she’s been gone for a while now. even still, it hurts all the same.

he’s beyond thankful that he has you. you don’t try to get him to forget about her, but you also don’t let him to wallow in self-pity. you honor her memory, letting him reminisce about better times. likewise, you’re more than happy to accompany him on his shopping trip.

Polnareff is quiet for most of the trip. it’s uncharacteristic of him, and if you’re being honest, a little uncomfortable. though you know he’s doing his best to focus. you can tell from the way his gloved fingers stay laced with yours, his grip tightening just the slightest to remind you that he’s still present. 

you try to cheer him up by getting a spiced wine and offering to share with him. and. jesus christ. his eyes just light up. it’s that cute, couple-y shit that he loves and you did it for him like it was nothing. from then on, Polnareff is a little less mopey. more lighthearted. the Polnareff you know and so deeply love, back at it with his high-spirited self.

he stops you when it’s time to return home. shopping bags rest in his grip, with the faintest tint of red on his upper lip from all the wine. you’re pretty exhausted ― both from shopping and trying to keep him happy ― and he knows this, yet he stops you nonetheless. it’s a quick affair, where he puts a simple, glass heart ornament in your palm, the date written in silvery letters. oh? he must have gotten it when you weren’t looking. ↳ “you’ve helped me a lot today. you know that, vérité? I just... want to remember this day forever.”