#and I just got back from visiting portland......god there are so many lovely queer and trans people there i want to move there SO badly
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got a top surgery date after years and years and its made me start thinking about true love again
#ykno?#if i elaborate i'll cry for suuuure#blithering on#gender#trans#top surgery#its kinda insane how I've felt more depressed than I have in a loooong time- and then out of the blue i got a top surgery date and now im.#thinking how wonderful and beautiful life can be when you make it your own#and when you can find others who find beauty in similar ways to you#Im. so ready to be able to stand up straight and breathe deeply and hold my shoulders back and get chest tattoos and hug the people i love#its been five years. and I finally have a date. its in two weeks.#ive never had more of a reason to stay alive.#and Ive seen so many videos of people post op with their partners#and I just cant understand my mothers anxiety over me being alone forever#if im gonna be alone its because Im a got damn shut-in; not because of my transness#and I just got back from visiting portland......god there are so many lovely queer and trans people there i want to move there SO badly#to think I could live somewhere where running into other queer and trans folks is a daily occurance makes my heart ache soooo bad#anyway wow ive started rambling#and yeah I made myself cry but its happy crying for once! I cant believe i got a date. I finally got a date
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