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lemonlover1110 · 6 months ago

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𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬

Satoru Gojo

Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader

Summary: Your best friend gets a new boyfriend, and you come to see him in a different light.

Warnings: MDNI, Angst, Smut, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Hair descriptions for reader

*This is a commission for @mew4-ever18, it's the prequel to Pretty Little Liar! If you haven't read it yet, I recommend reading it after this🙂‍↕️ Anything that doesn't match up, remember that this is written after Pretty Little Liar

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“Hey, Le–” You begin, but you stop yourself when you see your co-worker is chatting with someone. You aren’t all that familiar with the building, but you’re here to work on a new system for the corporation’s computers. You aren’t familiar with the people, therefore you have no idea who Levi talks to.

You stare at the man, sitting down on a chair as if he owned the place. He clicks a pen over and over again as he speaks with Levi. You take note of his unusual white hair color; strange for a man like him, considering you’re around the same age. He certainly doesn’t belong in the IT department.

You make brief eye contact with his bright blue eyes before turning your attention to the computers… You almost feel flustered at the brief interaction– Something that can barely be considered an interaction. You listen in on the conversation,

“When are you coming over, Satoru? My wife is thrilled for you to meet the kids.” Levi speaks, and Satoru shrugs in response. The name makes you furrow your eyebrows… Satoru, you feel like you’ve heard the name before.

“I’ve been busy, Levi. I barely have a moment to myself.” Satoru responds, making Levi click his tongue. It’s almost as if Levi doesn’t believe it.

“Right, busy. That’s why you’re here.” Levi replies as he joins you to work on the computers. Satoru chuckles, and you feel your face get warm. He has a cute laugh at least. You know you won’t be bothered by him snorting as you work.

“I don’t know, Levi. He looks pretty busy to me.” You joke, making both men laugh. They continue their conversations as you work. It’s pretty trivial, nothing that’s noteworthy to you until Satoru speaks up,

“They’re using the café for some stupid shit on Friday.” Which sparks up your attention. You remember your best friend, Ali, mentioning something about a meet and greet. An event that she’s been obsessing over because her rival is showing up. “Something about influencers meet and greet. I can’t imagine being so obsessed with someone that you’ve never seen, that you’ll pay to meet them.”

“You’re so judgy, Satoru. Maybe use that opportunity to get a girlfriend.” Levi answers.

“Like hell I’d pay to meet someone.” Satoru quickly responds, making Levi roll his eyes.

“Your father owns the building, I’m sure you can get in without a hitch.” Levi responds, making your eyes widen. You stare back at Satoru, and his eyes are as wide as yours. His cover has been blown, all thanks to Levi.

“I’m not–” He begins, but you shake your head as a chuckle escapes your lips.

“Your secret is safe with me.” Your fingers do a zipping motion across your lips, which makes a subtle smile appear on his lips.

“Your hair is really pretty by the way.” He says, eyes staring at your curly brown hair. You smile at him, muttering a barely audible thank you, before turning around and focusing on your job. They chat for another minute before Levi tells him,

“Go back to work, Gojo. We don’t need your dad coming down here and turning the place upside down.” Which makes Satoru cross his arms and pout as if he were a child. You look back at him and laugh at his reaction.

Satoru makes a joking comment before standing up and leaving the place, finally going back to his job.

“I can’t wait for the weekend, I’m tired.” You comment as you chop up some vegetables, getting dinner ready for you and your best friend. Ali sits in the living room, staring at her phone.

You can only assume that she’s editing some pictures to post. She’s so close to two million followers, and she’s posting just about anything to get attention. Or maybe she’s looking for outfit ideas, considering she’s going to be at the same place as Mai– She’s only reminded you over a hundred times that Mai’s her rival. One thing about Ali, she’ll make sure to stand out.

“Did I tell you what happened at work today? Some guy had an accident and they had to call an ambulance.” You continue talking, only to be met by hums. At least she’s listening, that’s what you tell yourself. You know that she’s busy and nervous for the event so you can’t blame her for not paying much attention.

You continue talking to her, not met by a single word from her. Not until you say something that catches her attention, “I also met the COO, I think his name was Satoru?”

“Gojo?!” She quickly questions, and you nod in response. She seems excited at the response, as if she knows exactly who Satoru is.

You furrow your eyebrows before asking her, “Do you know who he is?”

“Of course I know who he is! He’s the most eligible bachelor in the city– Not to mention he’s our age.” She explains, and you’re surprised to see her so excited at the mention of Satoru. You should know by this point though. It’s even more surprising to hear her say, “Did you guys talk? What happened?”

“Oh, there wasn’t much to say. Him and my coworker were just talking about the event on Friday and that’s about it.” You tell her, and there’s a spark of hope in her eyes. She doesn’t have to ask before you gently let her down. “I don’t think he’s going… He did say he’s busy.”

“Oh.” Her excitement quickly turns sour, and you can’t help but feel bad for your best friend.

“But maybe you’ll bump into each other! Satoru is really sweet, he complimented my hair.” You share, a bit of a dumb smile on your lips as you recall the moment. He’s really handsome, and to be complimented by him is utter flattery.

You fail to notice how Ali rolls her eyes, a complete look of jealousy taking over her face. She lets out a small sigh before telling you, “Oh, dear. You’re just naive.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” You innocently reply, and there’s a pitiful look in her eyes. It’s as if she feels sorry for you.

“I’ve heard he does it to everyone… He’s a bit of a flirt.” She answers, and you raise your eyebrows. You let out a low chuckle before nodding in response.

“I wasn’t thinking much of it.” You reply, though your flattery fades away in a matter of seconds. She’s right, why did you even think much of such a simple compliment?

You continue talking, and as the conversation shifts from Satoru, she loses her interest once again.

Satoru doesn’t really care for coffee, but right now he can’t keep his eyes open. He needs to drink something to stay awake. He tried to slack off with Levi, but it seems that Levi would rather help his wife than help Satoru avoid work.

Satoru gets to the first floor of the building, and sees the line to enter the café. It’d be more time effective to get into his car and drive away, but he won’t do that. Satoru technically owns the building, so he should be able to skip the line without a problem. He ignores the complaints and yells from the people in the line.

Security lets him in without an issue, considering he’s very easy to recognize. One must be living under a rock to not recognize who Satoru Gojo is.

The man plans on simply getting a coffee and leaving. Before his plan can even start, something catches his eye– Someone. They make eye contact before she turns her attention to a fan. She smiles brightly at them, tucking a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear.

He should just get his coffee and leave, she’s not the type of woman that Satoru would go for. The self-absorbed type. The type that he’d go after just for sex– It’s not that Satoru doesn’t like women that are self confident, he just doesn’t like when they can only talk about themselves.

Even with his internal dilemma, he decides to step toward her. They grin at each other before she speaks up,

“Hey. Here for a picture?” Which makes him chuckle. He ends up nodding, because he’d be a fool to say no to her. The same man that was talking bad about the event is now glad that it’s happening in this building.

He leans down to take a selfie with her, both of them smiling brightly at the camera. There’s someone else waiting to meet her, but they can wait. Her attention is completely on Satoru.

“I’m Allison by the way.” She tells him, extending her hand for Satoru to take. He laughs again, taking her hand. It was easy for her to know that Satoru had no idea of her existence… But he still wanted a picture.

“I’m Satoru.” He introduces himself, and he knows that she knows who he is. The man looks back at the line that is waiting to meet the woman, and he asks, “Am I holding up the line?”

“Oh, no!” She doesn’t skip a beat. It’s clear that she doesn’t want the man to leave so soon, not until she gets his number. “I mean, I’ve got all day.”

“I wouldn’t want some of the men in the line to–” Satoru looks back at the line, filled with grown men that are here simply to talk to Ali. He’s definitely interrupting, but she doesn’t seem to care so why should he? “Ah, who cares in the end? I’m talking to a very gorgeous woman, to hell with them.”

“I’m flattered.” She answers, and they continue their conversation. Other people in line grow desperate, a meet up that’s supposed to last two minutes has been extended by eight minutes. It’s not ending anytime soon either.

After a couple more minutes, Satoru hands her his phone, telling her, “How about you give me your number so we can talk a bit more?”

“I’d love to.” She smiles, not hesitating before giving him her number. She smiles, knowing that this is just the beginning of something wonderful with Satoru.

It’s nothing serious. Satoru just wants to meet up with Ali for one thing and one thing only. It’s not like he’s deceiving her as he texts her, Satoru makes it clear that she knows that he only wants sex. She’s clearly fine with it, from what he can tell.

They agree to meet up at a hotel that isn’t too far from the café. Neither of them have to drive too much to meet up with each other. Satoru’s penthouse is nearby, but that’ll just turn things more personal than what they need to be.

Satoru gets to the hotel, where he finds Ali waiting in reception. She’s eagerly looking around, excited to lay her eyes on him. He smiles at her when she finally sees him. Ali doesn’t waste a single second on walking over toward him, opening her arms to hug him.

“I hope you weren’t waiting long.” Satoru comments, as his hand grabs hers. She shakes her head, assuring him that she wasn’t there for too long.

“Shall we go?” He asks, and she nods in response. She makes conversation, while Satoru prefers to stay quiet. He’s not trying to hide the fact that he isn’t looking for something more.

He’s at the hotel for sex. He doesn’t have to engage in conversation because he’s made his intentions clear.

And even with his very clear intentions, when he wakes up in the morning, he still takes her to breakfast. He feels a twinge of guilt as he watches her sleep beside him. He doesn’t know what it is– Perhaps it was something she said last night that makes him feel like this.

He’ll take her for breakfast before giving her a proper goodbye.

Ali comes home a little past noon, wearing the same clothes as the previous day. You can’t help but notice immediately when she walks through the door. You’re not one that keeps tabs on her, after all, Ali is grown– But you can’t lie, you were worried. She had failed to tell you about any plans after the event, and she didn’t answer any of your messages.

“I’m home!” She sings, clearly elated about something. You can already form the picture. One of her fans was more handsome than she intended and she couldn’t help herself. You’re happy for her.

“Glad to see you’re okay.” You tell her, not caring to look up much from your phone. You know her, she’ll end up locking herself in her room for the rest of the day to catch up on sleep. You think you have her all figured out until she sits beside you on the couch. You look up at her, curious. “What happened?”

“Do you remember Satoru Gojo?” She can’t hide her smile. You nod in response, furrowing your eyebrows as you think about him. In what possible scenario would they– No. No no no. “He went to the meet and greet yesterday and he asked for my number!”

“That’s great, Ali!” You tell her, a little shocked about it. You would’ve sworn that he’d never show up to the meet and greet, but it seems that he changed his mind at the last second. However, the story clearly doesn’t stop there, otherwise she wouldn’t be wearing yesterday’s clothes.

“We kept texting all day before we agreed to meet up at a hotel and let me tell you!” She excitedly continues, but your interest is quickly lost. You don’t want to hear about Ali’s wonderful night with Satoru. You love her to death, but you don’t need the details of her sexual life. “He’s so passionate, my goodness! He kept going all night and–”

She continues, and you feel queasy at every detail. Ali just can’t keep stuff to herself. You won’t lie and say you aren’t a bit disappointed as she tells you everything. It means that Satoru is completely off limits now. Though, you don’t believe that you ever had a chance with him.

You’re happy for her, especially when she says, “He’s the man of my dreams, I’m telling you. We’re destined to be together.”

“I’m so happy for you, Ali.” You respond, and she has a hint of smugness in her expression. It’s not something you pick up on.

You swear that she tells you out of pure excitement since she’s your best friend, and you’re her best friend as well.

Something that was meant to be a one night stand has turned into something more. It has no labels, that’s something that Satoru makes clear; something that Ali complains to you about every other day. Every single day she mentions Satoru, without failing to bring up how lucky she is.

It’s been two months, and Ali is expecting some sort of commitment from Satoru. She knows she can’t force it, but she’s slowly growing impatient. It’s something that has become clear to Satoru as well.

Satoru intends to let her down gently, but there’s never a right time. He’s walking her back to her hotel room after a very eventful day.

There’s never a right time because they spend a lot of time together. Very stupidly he decided to invite her overseas for her birthday. He’s not committing to her, but he’s very much giving her mixed signals.

“You know, Satoru, I love spending time with you.” Ali suddenly says, and Satoru’s eyebrows perk up. He’s about to ask why, but she reads his mind. “You make me feel seen… Usually when I’m with a man they make me feel like I’m some sort of object…”

“I’m glad that you feel that way around me.” Satoru weakly smiles, feeling his ears get red. She says that as if Satoru isn’t similar to them. They’re just hooking up.

They get to the door of her hotel room, and she proceeds to kiss his cheek. She squeezes his hands as she tells him, “Thank you for seeing me as someone more than just–”

“You don’t have to mention it.” He unintentionally cuts her off. He doesn’t want to hear it, knowing that he’s not as different as she claims he is.

“Thank you for inviting me out here. This place is truly beautiful.” She smiles brightly at him, unable to hide her happiness. “Bringing me here for my birthday was really thoughtful, I don’t know how to repay you.”

“You don’t have to repay me.” He assures her, placing a kiss on her forehead. He’s meant to let her down gently because he’s allowed this relationship to stray too far… But dumping a woman on her birthday? “Happy birthday, Ali.”

“Will you join me in my room? I want to watch a movie.” She asks, and Satoru bites down his lip before nodding in response. She opens the door to her room, and he sighs before speaking up.

“Ali, would you like to be my girlfriend?” It sounds forced and something he’d say out of pure guilt. Any other woman would be able to pick up on it by his tone, but Ali does not care. Her face lights up and she throws her arms over Satoru’s shoulders. She kisses him, her wordless answer to his question.

A label-less relationship has suddenly obtained a label. The last thing that Satoru wanted.

Ali invites you out the moment she gets back from her trip. You assume it’s her way to apologize for leaving you stranded. You had a special birthday surprise for her, only to find out that she was out of the country by her social media. Ali has a bad habit of leaving you in the dark.

She’s making it up by inviting you to a restaurant that’s absolutely out of your budget. You can’t believe your eyes once you’re outside of the place. You’ve heard of it before but you knew it was well out of your price range. She’s most definitely inviting you here to apologize since she sensed you were being a little cold with her lately.

You give your car keys to the valet and make your way into the place. You can’t help but feel a little out of place once you walk inside, but there isn’t much you can do about it. You give the host Ali’s name, and you’re quickly guided to the table.

Your eyes fall on her, a smile coming to your lips as you see your best friend. However, the smile quickly fades when you see that she isn’t alone. It strikes you that this isn’t an apology, but rather her introducing you to her boyfriend.

You can’t lie and say that you aren’t disappointed, but it’s easy to brush off. You’re still here with her, it shouldn’t matter.

“Hi.” You greet them, eyes lingering on Ali. You briefly look at Satoru, and you can tell that he doesn’t remember you. You were just a face that he once saw at work, you’re not hurt in the slightest.

“You’re finally here!” Ali exclaims, as if she’s overcompensating for something. Something you fail to pick up on.

“Yeah, there was a bit of traffic.” You tell her as you take a seat across from her and Satoru. Ali grins before she begins to introduce the two of you.

“Satoru, this my best friend.” She signals towards you, telling him your name. There’s a frown on his face, trying to recall where he’s seen you before. You almost feel embarrassed because you remember exactly who he is, but he can’t even remember if he’s seen you before.

Ali can’t wipe the smirk off her face as she introduces you to her boyfriend. She makes it clear that things are more than official now– She emphasizes the word as if she had forgotten to tell you, “And this is Satoru, my boyfriend.”

“Nice to meet you, Satoru.” You wave at him, forcing yourself to smile. You’re a bit unprepared for all of this, considering Ali didn’t give you a heads up about meeting her boyfriend. Alas, you can’t flee now.

“We’ve met before!” He exclaims, suddenly remembering you. So it’s you. You’re the friend that couldn’t join on the trip because Ali claimed you were too busy. “You don’t remember? I was in the IT department slacking off– Well, I wouldn’t say slacking off but–”

“Yeah, I remember you.” You cut him off, a low chuckle leaving your lips as he runs down the events. It’s not the only time you’ve bumped into each other. Not too long ago you saw him in a meeting, but he was too busy with work to notice you.

“I’m surprised you were too busy to join us on the trip, I didn’t think that your job was too demanding.” He brings up, and he feels Ali’s hand wrap around his wrist, squeezing. It seems like he’s overshared. You furrow your eyebrows, confused with what he says.

“Huh? What do you mean?” You question, and before Satoru can further explain that you were invited on Ali’s birthday trip but you turned down the offer, Ali butts in.

“The trip was just so last minute so I assumed that you couldn’t come.” She explains, and you feel another wave of disappointment washing over you. You try to understand though, you know Ali is awful at communicating certain things.

“Oh, I get it. Don’t worry about it.” You laugh it off. Awkwardness comes with the silence that ensues. Satoru looks around for the waiter, but he’s nowhere in sight.

“I love your glasses, by the way. Is that a new frame?” Satoru asks, not liking the awkward silence. You feel your face get warm at the compliment but before you can answer, Ali speaks in your behalf,

“Aren’t they cute? I picked them out for her!” She quickly takes credit. “She called me for help! Poor thing looked lost.”

“That’s why I have you around.” You respond, and she laughs. She pulls out her phone, and quickly begins to take pictures for her Instagram story.

“My followers will love this.” She comments as she gets you and Satoru in a shot. It’s truly not a meal with Ali until she pulls out her phone to post everything.

You’re back in Satoru’s workplace before you know it. You’re there to do a system check, something that doesn’t require you to deal with Satoru. You don’t want to say that you’re overjoyed that you’re not dealing with him, but you certainly aren’t upset about it.

Ali drags you along with her to almost everything that deals with him. Long story short, you third wheel a lot. You’re rightfully awkward around him, and you don’t want to deal with that feeling in a workplace setting. Perhaps things would be different if you got to know him in a different setting, but you’d prefer to keep things with him as minimal as possible.

Your prayers aren’t heard though. The moment that you step into the building, you make eye contact with him. You attempt to ignore him, acting as if you didn’t see him as you begin your job. He gives you that courtesy, and leaves you alone since you so clearly don’t want to be bothered.

Satoru leaves you alone until you bump into each other in the break room. When he sees you again, he wants to talk to you.

“How’s work today?” He asks, and you know that he’s directly talking to you since there’s no one else around.

“It’s fine.” You answer rather dryly, and he notices. It’s not intentional, you’re just focused on your job. “How about you? Are you down here slacking off?”

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about.” He laughs as if he’s been caught doing something that he’s not supposed to be doing. You’re right, you’ve caught him slacking off.

“Mr. Gojo, your office is not on this floor.” You remind him, and he feels a bit embarrassed. Right, the giant detail that he’s overlooked. “Levi is a bit busy, you can come in a couple of hours though.”

“How about you? Are you busy?” He asks, and you are but you’re also looking to take a longer break; you’ve got the perfect excuse lining up, the COO needed you so you couldn’t refuse.

“Why do you ask?” You reply, and he puts his hands in his pockets as he looks around the room. Once he sees that he’s free to say whatever he wishes, he answers.

“How about I give you a tour of the building? I know that you’re not here often.” He offers, and you take a moment to think about it. You already know the building pretty well, the parts that you don’t know don’t concern you. You still think about it.

“Mr. Gojo–” You begin, only to be quickly interrupted by him.

“Please, we’ve spent enough time together. Call me Satoru.” He corrects you, and you hum in response.

“Alright, Satoru, show me the place.” You agree, only for him to grab your hand and drag you out of the break room without hesitation. He does not think about how things might be awkward afterward, Satoru simply lives in the moment.

“Alright you two, look at my phone.” Ali is practically shoving the camera right in your face to get the perfect shot. She needs to show off to everyone how great she is at managing her romantic and social life– She’s not the type of woman that puts a man over her friends.

“Alright, babe. Put the phone down.” Satoru tells her after what feels like the millionth picture. He planned this lovely picnic, only for Ali to only care about showing her followers. He likes Ali, but there’s just something about her that Satoru doesn’t like… Unfortunately, relationships can’t be perfect.

“Just one more!” She claims, making Satoru click his tongue. No matter what he says, Ali won’t put the phone down.

“Thank you for joining us. I would’ve sworn that at this point you’d be sick of us.” Satoru says as he passes you a sandwich. You laugh.

The only reason you joined was because you thought you’d be spending time alone with Ali. It’s rare to catch her alone nowadays since she’s usually with Satoru. It shouldn’t have surprised you to find out that the picnic was with Satoru; you weren’t even annoyed when you found it, as a matter of fact, you were happy to find out he was tagging along.

“Oh she’d never betray us, she’s like our loyal pet.” Ali comments, and you feel your face get warm of embarrassment. You can’t help but feel ashamed by her comment.

“Ali, apologize.” Satoru quickly tells her as a frown comes to her face. She crosses her arms, before asking,

“Why should I apologize?”

“It’s fin–” You begin but Satoru cuts you off. He’s not going to let her words slide.

“Because what you said was rude, she’s your best friend.” He’s getting upset about this, his tone of voice giving it away. Ali scoffs, not seeing anything wrong with her words. Why should she apologize when it isn’t a lie?

“You said it, she’s my best friend. I know her better than you do and I know that she’s fine with it.” She argues, and you’re almost praying for the ground to open and swallow you whole. Being here is already weird enough, but to watch them argue? You swear this is the last time you tag along without asking Ali about all the details.

“Do you not see how rude that is? You invited her, she didn’t beg to tag along.” He points out, which makes her roll her eyes. “You’re the one that usually invites her, you can’t say that about someone that never asks to join.”

“Fine!” She shouts, giving up. It usually means that she doesn’t have a counterargument. Additionally, if the argument escalates further then Satoru might just cancel the trip that they have for the weekend. She looks directly at you and forces herself to say, “I’m sorry for calling you our loyal pet.”

“It’s fine, I know you didn’t mean anything rude by it.” You reassure her, feeling completely and utterly embarrassed by this whole situation. Ali gives Satoru a weird look before she grabs herself something to snack on.

Things begin to change between you and Ali, and it’s all your fault. You’re refusing to hang out with her because you know that Satoru is going to be there. It’s not that you dislike him, on the contrary, you think he’s the perfect man for your best friend. But you can’t help but feel like there’s a weird dynamic whenever you’re third-wheeling.

Luckily, Ali doesn’t seem to notice that you’re distant. She’s too preoccupied with Satoru. You’re more than fine with it, as long as you don’t have to explain yourself.

It does kind of suck that you’re barely seeing her since you can’t ask for a small favor. Taking the bus is not the end of the world, but waiting for it while it’s raining is an annoyance to say the least. It’ll take at least five more minutes for the bus to come by. Your car just had to break down during the rainiest time of the month.

You’re watching all the cars go by, eyes focusing on a sports car that is all too similar to Satoru’s. It’s not an usual car to find in the area, so you don’t assume it’s Satoru– Not until the car pulls up at the bus stop and the window rolls down.

“Do you need a ride home?” You hear his voice before your eyes land on him. You bite down your lip as you look around the place. You really want to turn Satoru’s offer down, but the bus is nowhere near and the rain is not stopping any time soon.

“Yeah.” You end up accepting, opening the car’s door. You do have an umbrella, but it can only do so much against the heavy rain. You apologize for getting his car all wet as you get in, and he assures you that it’s fine.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were taking the bus?” Satoru asks as he begins to drive. As you open your mouth to answer, he speaks again, “Granted, we haven’t been seeing each other much.”

You chuckle. He turns on the heating, noticing that you’re shivering the moment you get into the car. He picks up on the small details and you hate it. You’re truly happy for Ali, but you hate that Satoru makes you feel so wonderful.

Perhaps the reason why you’re distancing yourself doesn’t have to do much with them but rather yourself. You’re slowly seeing Satoru in a different light and you could never forgive yourself.

“I don’t want to be a burden. I can imagine you’re sick of me.” You comment, attempting to pass it off as a joke when a laugh escapes your lips. He doesn’t find the humor in it.

“I miss you! When you’re not around Ali’s phone is all over me.” He jokes, and while you’d usually laugh, you can’t. His words weigh heavy on your heart. Why the hell would he tell you that he misses you? Does he not know what that does to a woman? “There’s a new dessert shop opening up soon, we should go there soon.”

He’s gotten to know you too well, that’s why you’re avoiding them. He’s Ali’s boyfriend, you’re overstepping a boundary. As a matter of fact, you shouldn’t be in his car. You feel awkward next to him– As if your heart was about to beat out of your chest. Your stomach churns every time that you look at him.

You frown as you look at him, suddenly feeling nauseous. You’ve come to a sudden realization. But no, it can’t be. No no no no no! You refuse to accept it.

“Hey, are you okay?” Satoru questions when he realizes the frown on your face as you stare at him. “Did I do something? Are you mad?”

“No, you’re fine! I just swore I saw something on your window.” You try to play it off, which he thankfully believes. You’re not in the mood to explain to him what you’re thinking of.

How awkward would it be to explain to him that you have a crush on him? Telling your best friend’s boyfriend about your weird feelings is the last thing you want to do.

You were planning on avoiding Satoru and Ali like the plague, but you started overthinking. Wouldn’t they notice something is up with you if you constantly ignore them? So you keep things to a minimum with the pretense that you don’t want to cut in. It’s nearly impossible to almost always avoid them, considering Satoru is almost always at your place.

You find yourself outside your apartment more often than usual. You’ve come to learn their schedule, and you’ve started to run errands whenever Satoru is around the apartment. It just never occurred to you that Satoru wasn’t abiding by a schedule, and that you’d bump into each other elsewhere.

You freeze in the middle of the grocery store when Satoru calls out your name. You curse yourself and pray that Ali is with him. You don’t want to find yourself alone with Satoru– You wouldn’t act out on your crush, but you still don’t feel comfortable at the thought of being alone with him.

“Hey, Satoru… What are you doing here?” The terrible question leaves your lips as you turn around to face him. Why else would he be here? He’s a human, he needs to get groceries to survive.

“Just getting some stuff for tonight. You’re coming to the dinner party, right?” Satoru questions, and you raise your eyebrow. You have no idea what he’s talking about. But instead of questioning him further, you simply shake your head. He sighs, “Ali insisted we host something for my birthday.”

“Oh, is it your birthday?” You ask.

“In the next couple of days.” He answers. “I thought Ali would invite you.”

“If I’m invited then her other influencer friends get jealous.” You remind him, and he clicks his tongue. They’re all so superficial, he’d much rather have you around over them.

“I already feel the headache coming on.” He jokes, making a low chuckle leave your lips. You begin to walk through the aisles, and the man walks by your side. He’s unknowingly complimenting you, which makes you want to drop to your knees.

“I really don’t know why she’d invite them and not you? I’d love to have you around, but them…” He says, and you laugh. You almost laugh at his every word, it’s a dead giveaway; but Satoru doesn’t notice. At least you think he doesn’t.

“Some of them are nice!” You tell him, but he’s not too sure that your words will uphold. Sure, they might be nice but they’ll all be too focused about themselves. They’re more than likely very similar to Ali– Which isn’t a bad thing, but sometimes Ali can only think about herself.

“Right.” He scoffs. You notice that he’s not picking up anything while he walks alongside you, making you wonder if he’s done with shopping. Or perhaps he’s simply forgotten that he’s here to shop.

“Are you done?” You ask him, and he looks back into his basket. He doesn’t even have half of the stuff he came here for.

“Shit…” He mutters, realizing he has to go through all of the aisles again. He pats your back before telling you, “Alright, I’ll leave you.”

“Bye, Satoru.” You wave at him as he begins to walk away. There’s a stupid smile on your face as you stare at him. A smile that quickly fades away when you remember that Satoru is Ali’s boyfriend.

“Alright, you have to be nice. We’re meeting his friends.” Ali tells you as she uses her phone camera to check her makeup. She wants to make the best impression on her boyfriend’s friends.

“I’m always nice.” You tell her, as the elevator takes you up to Satoru’s penthouse. It’s the first time you’re invited to his place, and you wonder how it looks. Is it cold and empty? Or is it welcoming? Considering he’s almost always at your place, you’ve already made your conclusions.

“These are like his very close friends so you know things are getting serious.” Ali comments, making sure that you remember how her and Satoru are an item. There’s not a second in the day where she’s not reminding everyone. It’s almost as if she doesn’t believe it herself that she’s with Satoru.

“Things are going to go great, Ali. Don’t worry about it.” You reassure her, and she takes a deep breath. The elevator doors open, and you grab her hand to comfort her, giving it a light squeeze. You step into the penthouse, looking around the place. It’s empty, just like you imagined it– Sure, it has furniture but it just feels empty.

“They’re in the kitchen.” Ali points to where she hears the laughter. You follow her to the kitchen, noticing that the laughter dies down the moment she enters the room.

Satoru walks to her side, taking her hand into his own as he faces his friends. He grins before he tells them, “Suguru, Shoko, this is my girlfriend, Ali.”

“Hi, Ali.” Suguru smiles, waving at the woman. Shoko doesn’t exactly greet her, but she does try to smile at her with a subtle wave.

“Hi, guys! It’s so lovely to meet you!” She acts as if she’s known them all of her life, going over to them and hugging them. Her hug isn’t rejected, but it isn’t necessarily well received.

You awkwardly stand by the door, feeling completely out of place. Ali came to you with the pretense that she needed you for moral support, and you couldn’t just reject her; right now you’re mad at your decision though. Your weekend plans are ruined.

“And this is,” Satoru introduces you to his friends as well, when Ali is done giving out her awkward hug. You wave at his friends, not as confident as Ali to go to them and hug them.

“So nice to meet you.” Shoko finally speaks, earning you a side-eye from Ali. You don’t notice it, instead you focus on Satoru’s best friends.

“I love your shirt, Shoko.” You comment, and she thanks you as she looks down.

“Do you listen to them?” She asks you, and you nod in response. It leads to a conversation about your favorite songs, a conversation that Suguru chimes into. Ali can’t join in since she doesn’t know the band, therefore she can’t add anything useful.

Ali feels left out, and she hates that feeling. Therefore, she’ll force herself into the mix

“You know who I love!” She begins, only for Shoko to coldly look back at her. Shoko raises her eyebrow, and Ali begins to speak. An artist that’s completely unrelated to the initial genre; frankly, someone that isn’t well liked around the room.

An awkward silence ensues when Ali stops talking, which makes Satoru intervene. The man clears his throat before speaking, “How about we go to the living room?”

To which you all agree to.

Conversation flows smoothly when you’re speaking to Suguru and Shoko. You expected to feel left out for the entire night, but surprisingly you get along fine with the duo. You can’t help but notice that Ali’s being left out, so every now and then you ask her a question that fits into the conversation. However, she doesn’t have much to offer.

“So what do you do?” Shoko asks you as she cuddles up to Suguru on the couch. You’re sitting on the floor, watching as the couples begin to snuggle up. It’s getting colder in the penthouse, so rightfully they’re seeking warmth.

“I’m a tech analyst. I occasionally work with Satoru’s company!” You share. “I’ve been to it maybe a handful of times.”

“Is it fun?” She questions and you laugh, which answers her question. “At least it’s a real job.”

“What do you mean?” You ask, and Shoko chuckles, shaking her head. She refuses to answer, though it should be clear she’s talking about Ali.

You look around the living room, watching as Shoko and Suguru snuggle up, as well as Ali and Satoru. You don’t feel as awkward as you should be since you’re used to this sort of thing. It isn’t the first and it won’t be the last time that Ali invites you to something for couples only.

“Awh, look at you. You look so lonely.” Ali takes a pitiful tone as she speaks to you, and suddenly a weird shame consumes you.

“What are you even saying? She’s with us.” Shoko immediately defends you, taking a harsh tone as she looks at Ali. “She doesn’t need a significant other.”

“Right, all a partner does is–” Suguru begins, which earns him a quick glare from Shoko. He bites down his tongue, deciding to not get himself in trouble. Suguru ends up clearing his throat before saying, “At least she’s making interesting conversation.”

“It’s getting late!” Satoru chimes in, not wanting to escalate things further. He quickly picks up on the fact that Shoko doesn’t like Ali, and he feels like Ali reciprocates that feeling. “I’m sleepy.”

“He’s kicking us out, Shoko.” Suguru says, sticking his tongue out at Satoru. The couple stands up, and you awkwardly remain on the floor. You regret accepting Ali’s proposal of staying the night.

“Aren’t you busy tomorrow? I don’t want you to be too tired for your plans.” Satoru tries to make it seem as if he isn’t kicking them out, when in reality he is. He doesn’t want things to escalate, and Suguru can tell which is why he doesn’t say anything else.

“Right, busy. Sunday morning. We’re going to church or whatever you do.” Suguru says as he’s led to the elevator by Satoru.

You take a quick look at Ali, seeing the upset look in her face. You’d usually comfort her, but you know that she isn’t in the mood for comfort. She needs a moment alone, which is why you stand up.

“I’m going to sleep.” You tell her, trying to smile at her. She simply hums, not even looking in your direction.

You wake up earlier than usual, unable to sleep for longer since the room you’re sleeping in isn’t your own. It’s odd, considering that the bed you lay on is the most comfortable bed you’ve ever touched. Last night’s events weigh heavy on your mind, contributing to the lack of sleep. You wonder if Ali is still upset with you, or if the sleep has cooled her off.

You get up from bed, and get out as quietly as possible. You don’t want to make a loud noise and wake up the happy couple– Although you doubt that any noise will reach them from how big the penthouse is.

A big yawn escapes your lips as you walk to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee. You freeze when you enter the kitchen and bump into Satoru. Your eyes widen when you realize he’s shirtless.

“Oh!” You can’t help but exclaim, as your eyes look him up and down. He’s only wearing gray sweatpants. Your face is turning hot, feeling almost like a complete virgin. You make eye contact with him, and the man looks at you utterly surprised.

“I’m sorry.” He quickly apologizes, and you dramatically turn around. He’s just shirtless, it’s not the end of the world. But you swear you took a peek at his underwear.

“No, it’s your home. You’re okay.” You trip over your words as your hands cover your face. He notices that your reaction is a tad bit dramatic. He won’t judge you for it, you have your reasons to react the way you do.

Before Satoru can utter another word, you’re out of the kitchen. Satoru furrows his eyebrows, as his eyes land on the box of macaroons that you got him for his birthday. Ali simply a watch, one that he already had in his collection. You took note of what he liked and went out of your way to get it for him.

It dawns on him. The reason why you reacted the way you did is because you like him. Luckily, Ali is asleep so she won’t notice a thing.

“Satoru, what are you doing?” You ask before he cups your face and kisses your lips. He’s kissing you so hungrily. He’s full of passion, as if he’s been waiting for this moment for a long time.

When did he get into your room?

“I need you.” He tells you between kisses, his hands going under your nightgown. He’s getting risky. Where did all of this come from? One moment he was cuddling up with Ali and then the next he’s kissing you as if you were his. You should fight back since you know it’s wrong, but your body melts.

You can’t do anything as Satoru kisses you, except give in. His lips move lower, going to your neck as his hands go higher. Before you know it, he’s playing with your panties. He teases your pussy, and you feel your breath get caught up in your chest as he gets more risky.

“We shouldn’t, Satoru.” Your voice is barely audible, easy to slip past his ears. You won’t repeat yourself because you don’t want him to stop.

He pushes your panties to the side, two fingers running through your folds. His fingers press against your clit, nearly making your eyes roll to the back of your head. He’s sucking on your neck, on that sweet spot that makes you weak. He already knows his body as if it were his own.

“Oh–” You gasp as he pushes a finger inside of you. You can’t believe this is happening– Oh how wrong is it? Poor Ali. But guilt isn’t the most prominent feeling in your mind, which means it’s ignored. A second finger quickly follows, and you swear you’re in heaven.

“I need you so badly.” He sounds breathless, utterly desperate. He curves his fingers, hitting just the right spot. You moan his name, quickly slapping your hand over your mouth. You don’t remember if Ali is nearby or not, but you don’t want to risk it.

His thumb is playing with your clit, feeling your whole body turn to putty. You can’t stop now. You need to feel him in every possible sense.

“Please…” You mutter, your body craving more. You can’t use your words, it simply makes things wrong. He reads your mind, pulling away and taking his shirt off. You can’t help but run your hands down his well toned torso. This is so wrong but you can’t bring yourself to stop.

Your hand reaches the waistband of his sweatpants, biting down your lip before you pull down. That’s where you lose control again, Satoru taking charge.

“Just relax, okay? I’ll take good care of you.” Satoru tells you as he puts you on your stomach, facing away from him. He fully lifts up your nightgown to get a good look at your ass. He slaps your ass before running the tip of his cock through your folds.

He slowly pushes himself in, and you bury your head into your pillow. You can’t make a noise as his thick cock fills you up. Your eyes are rolling to the back of your head as he bottoms out.

“Can you handle it, pretty girl?” He asks, giving you a moment to adjust to him. Your answer comes out muffled by the pillow, but luckily he can understand the yes that leaves your lips. He begins to move slowly.

Why is this happening? Not that you’re complaining. Guilt will eat you alive later, but you’re living in the moment. How could you not live in the moment when Satoru is fucking you?

“You feel so good.” Satoru moans, and you can’t hold yourself back on being as enthusiastic as he is. He’s hitting all the right spots, making your body feel euphoric.

You’re too in your head that you almost miss that the door opens– The door opens?! You immediately know it’s her, and you can’t stop. How will you explain it to her? No, no no no no! You seriously can’t be doing this to your best friend.

“Wake up, sleepyhead.” You hear, and suddenly she’s shaking your body. Your mind is snapped out of your subconscious when she yells, “Ew! You’re drooling!”

Your eyes slowly open, and you feel the guilt pit in your stomach when you realize you were having a dream about your best friend’s boyfriend. A very explicit dream to say the least.

“Ali, what do you need?” You question with a raspy voice, clearly just woken up from a very fantastic dream. No, not fantastic. A bad dream.

“You went to sleep really early last night. Don’t you think it’s time to wake up?” She reminds you. You remember getting home from Satoru’s place, and heading straight to your room. You spent all day in bed yesterday, almost as if you had a cold. “Plus, you told me you’d cook for me for my diet!”

“Oh, right… I forgot.” You respond, your hand wiping the sweat on your forehead. You look her up and down and ask, “Why are you going on a diet again!”

“It’s essential that I maintain my figure! I make a living out of this, you know?” She answers, and you give her a subtle nod. She ends up leaving your room to wait for her breakfast patiently.

A sigh leaves your lips, the tough reminder that you’re not only in charge of dinner anymore but breakfast and lunch as well. You’ll do it for her though, she’s your best friend.

You bounce your leg as you sit near Satoru and Ali. The couple snuggles up as they watch a movie. They forced you out of your room and made you join them, but you can’t even focus on the screen.

Satoru is the first to notice, considering you’re acting weird around him. He keeps looking back at you, wondering when you’ll calm down. You’ve never acted like this around him before… Was the shirtless incident that bad?

He gets that you like him, but you don’t have to be so tense and nervous all the time. He won’t try a thing, he’s not that kind of guy.

“Do you want some popcorn?” Satoru extends the bowl towards you, and Ali immediately shushes him. She acts as if she can’t rewind ten seconds to hear what she missed.

“I’m okay, thank you.” You awkwardly smile at him before quickly looking away. You won’t even dare to look him in the eye. You end up standing up from your seat, telling the couple, “I’m not feeling too well–”

“Just go.” Ali interrupts you, not caring too much that you want to go back to your room. It was Satoru’s bright idea to invite you along. She won’t mention it to him, but it’s annoying that he wants you to include you in almost everything.

Ali pauses the movie when your door closes, looking at it and then back at Satoru, “She’s acting weird.”

“What do you mean? She just looks tired to me.” Satoru acts confused. He knows Ali enough to know that the woman has a tad bit of a jealousy issue. If he were to tell Ali about his finding, she wouldn’t react in a rational manner.

They both know that you wouldn’t even dare to make a move on Satoru, but that won’t change a thing. Which is why Satoru chooses to bite his tongue.

“I don’t know. I don’t care too much anyway.” She ends up shrugging, resuming the movie.

“Happy birthday!” Satoru cheerfully congratulates you the moment he sees you. It took a while considering that you’ve been in your room all day.

“Thank you, Satoru.” You’re a little surprised that the man knows, let alone, went out of his way to congratulate you. You smile at him, as he holds his index finger up.

“I got you something, hold on. It’s in my car.” He practically runs out of the apartment, leaving you to look around the place. Ali is in her room, so you can’t ask her what Satoru got you.

You feel weird as you wait for him. All you can think about is the dream that you had not too long ago, and guilt fills you up. Ali’s your best friend, you shouldn’t like her boyfriend. You take a deep breath to calm down the mix of emotions that suddenly consume you.

“Here it is.” Satoru comes back, not even a minute later. He holds the pink gift bag, and extends it so you can take it. You thank him, too shy to open the gift in front of him. “I hope things can go back to how they were.”

“Huh?” You question, even though you know exactly what he talks about.

“Things have been weird between us… I don’t know what happened.” He responds, and you’re left speechless. You aren’t sure how to answer. Before you can answer, he signals toward the gift, “Well, aren’t you going to open it?”

“Yeah.” You put the gift bag on the counter and take the tissue paper out before your eyes fall on the gift. You smile, pulling out the wireless headphones. “Thank you, Satoru. These will come in handy.”

“I hope so! I got them when I remembered your job.” He explains, and you can’t help but smile. He finally sees a sincere smile on your face, something that he hadn’t seen in a while. “There’s something else in the bag.”

“Oh?” You furrow your eyebrows in confusion as you look inside. There’s a small blue box inside, and you feel your heart skip a beat as you look at it. You feel too self conscious to open it in front of him. “You didn’t have to, Satoru.”

“You’re my friend! Of course I had to.” He claims, signaling you to open the box. You bite down your lip before doing what he wants you to do. Your eyes glimmer at the sight of a beautiful charm bracelet.

“It’s so beautiful!” You exclaim, right when Ali exits the bedroom. She looks at what you hold in your hand, and then at Satoru. “Thank you, Satoru. I love it.”

“It’s no problem. Happy birthday.” Satoru responds, just as Ali’s arms wrap around him. He hugs her back, but his gaze remains on you. “What are you doing tonight? Are you going out?”

“Tomorrow night. I’m not doing anything tonight.” You answer.

“How about we take you to dinner!” He offers, and Ali gives him a cold stare. A stare that goes ignored by him.

“Oh, I don’t know. You’ve done too much.” You awkwardly respond, getting reminded that he’s Ali’s boyfriend as she hugs him. If you didn’t know any better, by the way she acts, you’d say she’s jealous.

“We insist. It’s your birthday.” He replies. “Go get ready, we’ll wait for you here.”

You argue a bit more with him before you finally accept. You go to your room with gifts in hand. When you’re out of sight, Ali can’t help but comment, “Didn’t you do a little much?”

“What do you mean? That’s your friend.” Satoru responds, and she sighs. He ends up letting go of her and asking, “What’s wrong?”

“It feels like you’re putting more thought into her birthday than mine.” She crosses her arms, getting pouty about it. Satoru should’ve known, Ali gets upset when the attention isn’t all on her. He doesn’t like to admit it, but she’s a bit selfish. “You’re doing more for her than what you did for me.”

“I took you overseas and gave you many gifts.” He reminds her, but that’s not enough for her. “Can’t you just be happy for your best friend?”

“Fine.” She clicks her tongue, and she ends up stomping away. She has to get ready.

Your birthday dinner starts off awkward, but it slowly gets better. Overall, you enjoy it. The food is delicious and the company is great. You still can’t help but feel like Ali is upset with you. You’re not sure what you did wrong, but she acts weird.

She ignores you the next day, or gives you the most basic answers to any question. You wonder if she’s upset with you because Satoru gave you a birthday gift but… How are you at fault for that? It can’t be that. You try to talk to Ali at night, but she’s with Satoru and you don’t want to interrupt anything.

You end up going to bed without speaking to each other. Maybe you’ll patch things up tomorrow before Shoko and Suguru come over.

You’re woken up by strange sounds in the middle of the night– The sounds seem distant until you listen closely. You furrow your brow, trying to make out the strange noises until you figure out what it is, then you just want to bury your face into your hands out of pure embarrassment.

“Oh, it’s so good, Satoru!” Quickly followed by “Like that! Just like that!”

And as you keep listening to it, you feel tears well up in your eyes. You don’t know why. Maybe it’s guilt because you like the man Ali is in bed with right now; or perhaps it’s because you know that you’ll never be with him.

You sniffle, reaching over for the headphones that Satoru got you and putting them on, deciding to listen to some soothing music to fall back asleep. You’ll listen to just about anything to block out that sound.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen gojo #satoru gojo #gojo saturo #gojo satoru #jjk gojo #gojo smut #gojo x reader #gojo jjk #jujutsu gojo #gojo satoru smut #gojo x you #jujutsu kaisen satoru #satoru smut #satoru angst #gojo angst

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filthygalli · 6 months ago

Text

When I Met You: Chapter 2 "Cat sitting"

Fem! Reader x Neighbor! Hwang In-Ho

Main Master list

Squid Game Master list

Genre/Tags: Grumpy x Sunshine, Light smut, Fluff, Angst, Slow burn, Age gap (Reader is in her early 30’s, While In-Ho is in his late 40’s.) Rude In-Ho (but will eventually be soft with the reader Soon!) Literature Professor! In-Ho (Not specified what kind of literature) More Tags to come soon!

Warnings: Rude In-Ho, Some mild cursing, Sexual Innuendo, Terrible text messages edits by me, There's some bitch who's being touchy to our In-Ho, Mostly Yu-Jin and Y/n moments, Not proofread.

Word Count: 4281 (Jesus Christ, I haven't written something this long...)

Author's Note: I'm so sorry for publishing this a bit late, I've encountered some minor problems, I also ran out of space for pictures so there will be some lackings when it comes to my original designs for my fictions forgive me🙏🏻 but I hope you guys like this! 🖤

In-Ho groans as he saw the text message of Yu-jin’s sitter,

“I knew I should've just looked for a better cat sitter,” he said as he stared at the message. Meanwhile, Yu-Jin sat on In-Ho’s lap, looking up at him, “You hungry? ” In-Ho said, looking down at Yu-Jin, who seems to understand what In-Ho just said, “I need to find someone who’s going to look after you this morning.” He said as he set down Yu-Jin’s food bowl on top of the kitchen counter. Yun-Jin didn’t pay any attention to what his dad was saying. In-Ho chuckled as he watched Yu-Jin eat its breakfast.

He sighs as he grabs his phone from his pocket, scrolling on it, finding someone who will look after Yu-Jin while he’s gone from work. Few minutes have passed he still haven’t found someone, He thought of continuing to find later as he checked the time “Shit-” He’s going to be late—He rushed to the bathroom and took a quick shower, The warm feeling of the shower made him feel relaxed, Leaving all the thoughts behind his mind as he focused on relaxing for a while—He doesn’t care anymore if he gets late, He sighs as he turned off the shower head, stepping out from the shower, he quickly brushed his teeth as he dries himself. He looks at himself in the mirror. He looks tired—his mustache is already growing. He scoffs as he leaves the bathroom, not even caring to shave his face. He puts on his ironed dark gray button-up shirt, rolling the sleeves up to his elbows. He puts on black pants and a pair of dark leather loafers. He looks at himself In Front of the mirror, combing his hair through his hands, He got startled as he felt Yu-Jin circled around his legs, “Jesus, You scared me there buddy–” He chuckles as he pick Yu-Jin in his arms not bothering if it mess up his clothes, He and Yu-Jin sat down on the edge of the bed, Grabbing his phone as he checks if there’s someone who messaged him about the cat sitting, “Fuck, This is so fucking frustrating–” He muttered under his breath, “Sorry.” He says apologizing, looking down on the cat who’s resting on his lap.

He can’t just leave Yu-Jin at home alone. Who will feed Yu-Jin? What if he wants to drink water and his bowl is empty? What if Yu-Jin wants to take a walk and sneak out of the house? He continues to think of all the possibilities that might happen to Yu-Jin while he’s at work. He just can’t leave Yu-Jin with his neighbors; Yu-Ji doesn’t even like any of his neighbors…except you.

That’s right, You–Yu-jin liked you. Usually, even with Yu-Jin’s sitter, he doesn’t play or ask for belly rubs. Yu-Jin is more of a nonchalant cat to other people, while to In-Ho… Yu-Jin is a playful and sweet cat. Yu-Jin would often sleep beside In-Ho, sit on In-Ho’s lap while he finished some paperwork for the university, or while he read a book. But when Yu-Jin approached You that day, In-Ho wasn’t expecting that You and His cat, Yu-Jin, would get along pretty well. He ruffled Yu-Jin's fur as he set him down beside him. “I think I found a cat sitter for you.” He chuckled as Yu-Jin looked up at him with an ‘Oh, really? Nice dad.’ Look.

Meanwhile, you’re busy cooking food for your breakfast. You started singing and swaying your hips a little as Telepatia by Kali Uchis played in the background. You decided to wake up early this day, wanting to finish the book that you’ve been reading for a while, ‘Inferno’ by Dante Alighieri. You liked the book, Inferno, which describes the journey of a fictionalized version of Dante himself through Hell, guided by the ancient Roman poet Virgil, and you’re invested in it. Turning off the heat of your stove, you grabbed a plate and placed your bacon and eggs on it. You grabbed a glass of lemon water and set it beside your plate. You took a bite and savored the taste of the salty and sweet flavor of the bacon. You grabbed your phone to check your schedules for today, which, to your surprise, is not much of a busy day for you. Just a couple of cleaning, doing the laundry, sending some draft proposals to your clients, and reading books. After finishing your breakfast, you stood up and put your plate in the dishwasher, turning it on as you heard a knock coming from your door.

In-Ho picked up Yu-Jin in his arms and grabbed his briefcase full of paperwork from the university. He quickly grabbed a spare key to his house before going out. “Right, here goes nothing, Yu-Jin.” He sighs as he knocks on your door. He tries his best to be patient with you, remembering how rude he was the last time he knocked on your door, “Just a sec! ” You said as you opened the door. Your eyes widened at the sight in front of you. In-Ho looked handsome with his attire, and those damn glasses... why do they suit him so well! You noticed the briefcase in his other hand. Is he going somewhere? Work maybe? And he’s also… holding his adorable cat Yu-Jin? “Good morning, Mr. Hwang! ” You said as you gave him a smile. In-Ho looked at you for a moment before answering, You looked stunning. Your messy bun hair, he liked how you smiled to him. It's genuine and innocent the way your eyes would turn into crescent-like moons. He cleared his throat. “Good morning,” he almost whispered. You immediately focused your attention on Yu-Jin. “Aren’t you a handsome one—! ” He looked at you confused. Are you calling him handsome? Then you reached your hand to touch Yu-Jin’s face. Oh. You’re talking about Yu-Jin and not him. He felt embarrassed, thinking that you see him that way. Not that he cared. He is handsome. He knows it. Lots of people from the university know it, and he wouldn’t care if you don’t see him that way. “What brings you here? Oh, you look so cute, Yu-Jin! ” You said, smiling brightly at Yu-Jin, who also seemed happy to see you. He let you pet him, purring at your touches as you do. In-Ho once again cleared his throat, catching your attention, and it did. You looked up at him. You gave him a smile before asking, “What brings you and Yu-Jin here, Mr. Hwang? ” You gave him a confused look, curious about the reason why he’s here. He barely gave you a glance, and when he did, he scoffed, saying, “Aren’t you going to let me in first? ” He said with a mocking tone, ‘Geez, he's the one who came here, and he’s being rude already? ’ You thought, you chuckled awkwardly, “Right, I’m sorry—please come in.” You opened your door just enough for In-Ho and Yu-Jin to enter your home, and when they did, you couldn’t help but smell In-Ho’s perfume; he smelled manly and strong. It almost felt like tobacco and leather combined… It’s a strong scent, and you can’t help but fall in love with how good he smells, I mean, what do you expect? He looked handsome and expensive with his look right now. Any woman out there would be begging to get into his pants. One look from him and he’ll send you to heaven. You just wish how good he looks and smells would also reflect his attitude. He’s rude and stubborn. You do understand him, though. He looked like a busy person whose world only revolves around his cat, Yu-Jin, and his work.

“Please, take a seat, Mr. Hwang.” You said, leading him and Yu-Jin to your living room. Yu-Jin, whom In-Ho sets down, seems to be comfortable already. He started to walk to your sofa and lay there comfortably on his back, asking for a belly rub. You smiled at the sight in front of you. You walked towards the sofa and sat down beside Yu-Jin to give him belly rubs. Meanwhile, In-Ho can’t stop himself from smiling at the sight in front of him. He’s glad that you and Yu-Jin are getting along. He liked how Yu-Jin loved your presence. This is just your second meeting with Yu-Jin, and he can’t help but ask himself, ‘What’s so special about her? ’ He continuously admires you as you look at him as you slightly tilt your head, “Mr. Hwang?”

He snapped back into reality as you called his name, making him walk towards you. He sat down beside you. You took a quick glance at his lips. God, it looks so kissable, and by the looks of it, He takes care of himself a lot. You also noticed his growing moustache. He looked more attractive. “So, what are you and Yu-Jin doing here? ” You asked him. He took a moment to answer you. It almost feels like he’s trying to find words for how he is going to say it. Honestly, he felt embarrassed. He was rude to you. Well, until now he is. He just doesn’t like how you’re so lively and kind after what he did to you last time. “Yu-Jin’s cat sitter, she said she won’t be doing cat sitting for a while,” he mumbled as he looked down on your lips, then your neck. ‘Fuck,’ he thought. ‘Oh… That’s unexpected—” You gave him a shy smile as you pet Yu-Jin. ‘You’re so sweet, Yu-Jin. If I were them, I’d love to take care of and look after you any day! ” You smiled at Yu-Jin, who’s now sitting on your lap, “I can look after this little one if that’s ok with you. ” In-Ho gave you a subtle nod. “I—I actually went here to ask you a favor about that,” he scoffed. “I guess I don’t need to ask you that anymore.” You chuckled at his words. “I’m more than happy to take care of Yu-Jin, and I’ll do it for free.” “What? ” He asked as he gave you a confused look, “Why would you do that? “ “Yu-Jin is a good cat; I like him.” You replied, making In-Ho look at you for a while. ‘She is really special,’ he thought. He nodded and didn’t say anything.

The silence felt so loud and heavy. Good thing that Yu-Jin is there to at least make you feel accompanied. In-Ho's shoulders are tense; perhaps he’s nervous, afraid, but for what? Why would he feel nervous and afraid in front of you? There's no reason for him to feel that way when he’s with you.

“You’re off to work, I presume?” You asked, breaking the silence between the two of you. He nodded.’What’s your work? ...if you don’t mind me asking.” You felt brave enough to ask that. “I teach,” he sighs, “I work as a professor.” He added, “Oh, really? That’s great. What subject do you teach?” You asked as a hint of excitement showed in your face, and In-Ho noticed it. He couldn't help but smile when he quickly stopped himself, “Literature, I teach different kinds of literature.” Your excitement grew bigger, It was unexpected that Mr.Hwang, your grumpy and rude neighbor work as a professor for literature, You can’t help but imagine him teaching in front of the class, how his deep and soothing voice would echo the classroom, How would he look like leaning back on his table as he teach or observe the class, How attractive would he look like leaning down to a student when a certain student asked him a question while he looks at the student with those beautiful brown eyes…You stopped yourself from thinking anything else by asking In-Ho some questions about Yu-Jin, on what Yu-Jin can eat and can’t eat, In-Ho tells you everything that you need to know, You made sure that you will remember this later that's why you grabbed your phone and opened your notes app to type down everything that you need to know about Yu-Jin.

In-Ho thinks that it's very thoughtful of you to do that, given that you both barely know each other, and yet you kept giving him kind gestures, or maybe you're doing it because of his cat, Yu-Jin.

“Do you mind if I ask you something?” In-Ho asked as he slowly turned his gaze on you,

Fuck.

Those brown eyes of his could swallow stars, galaxies, and the universe…

Your breath hitched. “Uhm… Yeah, sure,” you said as you tried your best not to look back at him; you just couldn't look him in the eyes.

“You asked me about what I do,” he paused for a moment, his eyes still looking at you. “What do you do for a living? ” He added, “I work for a company as their graphics designer.” You smiled up at him, “Hmm, must've been fun? ” He gave you a shy smile. “It is, but a little stressful…” There it is again, silence. You hate it; you're used to silence like this, but it doesn't feel right. “I should go,” he said, standing up. “Right,” you looked up at him, his figure towering over you. “Don't worry; I'll take good care of Yu-Jin; he'll be safe here.” You gave him a reassuring look. Before you could stand up, he leaned down. Your heart skipped a beat, thinking of the possibilities of what he was going to do. The smell of expensive perfume filled your nose; you just couldn't help but lean slightly on his neck and—”I'll see you later, Yu-Jin. Be a good cat, will you?”He said, chuckling as he pets Yu-Jin, who's still sitting on your lap, ‘That was close,’ you thought.

You put down Yu-Jin on your side as you stood up, following In-Ho to show him the way out. ‘God, his back is so…broad.’ You thought as In-Ho grabbed the doorknob and twisted it; the door swung open. He took a pause before looking behind to talk to you; he reached out something in his pocket, “Here,” he said as he extended his hand, giving you a key, “This is a spare key from my house; whenever Yu-Jin needs anything, feel free to go to my house and get it; you can also stay there if you don't want to take care of Yu-Jin here at your home.” He said coldly; you nodded as you grabbed the silver key in his palm.

His skin feels so soft against yours; you remember the first time you brushed your hands on his. “Alright, got it, Thank you Mr. Hwang.” You smiled up at him, “I’m Y/N, by the way–” you extend your hand offering him a handshake, “I feel rude for not telling you my name…” you felt embarrassed, but In-Ho didn't say anything, He just looked at your hand then to your lips for a second before looking in your eyes, He scoffed as he shake your hand, Finally—the warmth of his hand and the softness made contact with yours fully, In-Ho felt something inside him, he doesn't know what it is, “In-Ho, Hwang In-Ho.” He said, his voice is deep enough to make your breath hitch, “I know–” you chuckled, you saw him smile a little bit quickly fades as he pressed his lip together into a fine line, “My number is on Yu-Jin’s collar, if you need anything, Let me know.” And just like that, He left, leaving you standing on your door.

After finishing all the things you needed to do, you decided to feed Yu-Jin. You're lucky enough to have some cat food laying around; you liked feeding stray cats on the way home.

You put the cat food on the plate as you called Yu-Jin, who was lying on the coffee table; you chuckled as he hurriedly ran to the kitchen. He started circling on your legs. “Alright, alright, here you go.” You set the plate down as Yu-Jin looked at you before eating, “Eat well, Yu-Jin.” You remembered that you had saved In-Ho's phone number; you quickly grabbed your phone from your pocket as you typed in his name. You decided to update him about Yu-Jin. You took a couple of pictures of Yu-Jin, who had just gotten done eating and was now lying on his back; he looked satisfied with the meal he just had. You chuckled as you went through a bunch of pictures of Yu-Jin in your gallery. You picked the best one to send to In-Ho.

After tapping the send button, you quickly pick Yu-Jin up in your arms as you grab the spare key to In-ho’s house.’Now, before we go out, you definitely need your leash…”

You went out with In-Ho’s cat, walking through the sidewalk till you reached In-Ho’s house.’Wait here for a while. It’ll be quick,” you said as you put down Yu-Jin to insert the key in the keyhole. Yu-Jin patiently waited for you as he looked up at you with his emerald green eyes. You twisted the knob and looked down at Yu-Jin. “Aww, you look so cute! ” You chuckled as you picked him up. Your eyes widened when you saw the inside of In-Ho’s house—it's beautiful! The walls are painted black with some accents of gold. The floors are made of fine polished wood, and there’s a big bookshelf full of books arranged by the colors of their book covers. Before you do anything, you’re here for one reason, Yu-Jin. You need to find where In-Ho keeps Yu-Jin’s leash.

You grab your phone from your pocket and you type in a message for In-Ho, hoping not to disturb him.

You smiled at his quick response. Was he waiting for your text? Or did you disturb him? You looked around to locate the drawer, which is not that hard thanks to In-Ho’s detailed message. You pulled the first drawer and found a red leash. “This must be it, right, Yu-Jin? ” You looked at Yu-Jin, who was sitting on the edge of the stairs. You chuckled seeing his confused expression, “C’mon Yu-Jin—we’re going to have a lot of fun! ”

You and Yu-Jin take a walk at the park. It's a sunny day. You made sure to bring water bottles with you like what In-Ho said in his message. He’s not bad after all. Yu-Jin patiently walked with you; he’s not rushing things or making you feel scared that he might run and cause chaos. He's a sweet, patient, and obedient cat. Why can't his dad, In-Ho, be like Yu-Jin?

You grabbed your phone from your purse. “Yu-Jin—look here—” You chuckled as you took some silly pictures of Yu-Jin. Sometimes…Yu-Jin can be a little stubborn, just like his dad, In-Ho. You sent the pictures to In-Ho hoping to see them and might brighten his day a little.

In-Ho just got done with his classes; one of his colleagues approached him, “Why are you late earlier? ” The woman clung to his arms. “Me being late doesn’t concern you.” He said coldly, not even bothering to look at the woman, “Don’t put your arms on me like that; we’re not together.” He said, grabbing the hands of his colleague, who seemed taken aback by what In-Ho did. In-Ho left without saying a word. He quickly went into the parking lot as he felt his phone vibrate inside his pocket. He sighed as he pulled it out. His eyes softened upon seeing your message. He replied to your message; he can’t help but smile. You kept giving him updates about Yu-Jin and, especially, you. He types a message and taps the send button before he drives home that day with a stupid smile on his face that only his cat, Yu-Jin, gets to see.

You and Yu-Jin sat down on a bench. You pulled out Yu-Jin’s food bowl and poured some water on it. Yu-Jin sat down beside you as he drank water. “You looked worn out,’’ you said as you chuckled. “Let’s go home,” you said as you put Yu-Jin’s empty food bowl inside your purse, setting him down on the ground as you two walked again to head home.

You and Yu-Jin arrived at your home. You fed Yu-Jin and decided to freshen up. You had a lot of fun today, and it’s fun to have someone like Yu-Jin. He’s a really nice cat to be with. You want to know more about Yu-Jin and, well, about In-Ho too. You want to be close to him, to become friends with him. You like his presence around you. You wonder if he thinks the same about you. Does he mind being friends with you? --Your phone vibrates as you reach it out on the coffee table in front of you, a text message from In-Ho.

You smiled at his text message, You don't know why, But it felt good, You quickly replied back to him.

You sigh as you tap the send button; you grab your book and read it. The warm silence of your home feels good; it's not the silence that you and In-Ho get when you two are together, blankly staring at each other, not talking unless either of you starts it. Yu-Jin sat on your lap, deciding to disturb your little peace. Not that you don't mind; you love Yu-Jin; he's an adorable cat. You chuckled as you took your phone out to quickly snap a picture of Yu-Jin,, who's doing a little pose on your book; you laughed as you sent it to In-Ho, thinking he might also find it funny.

In-Ho stops his car from the red light, he sees your text message, he opens it and sees Yu-Jin's adorable picture, he smiled and replied to your message.

A few moments later you heard a car engine going off, ‘that must be him,’ you thought as you looked through the window as you see In-Ho going out of his black Mercedes-AMG SL ROADSTER, ‘Damn’ you thought, he saw you from the window, he walked towards your porch, opening it before he even gets the chance to knock on your door, “Hi.” You said giving him a smile, he said nothing but eventually gave you a subtle nod, you let him in, “Yu-Jin's been good, he didn't give me any headaches, he's nice throughout the morning.” You mumbled as you and In-Ho went into the living room, seeing Yu-Jin asleep on the leather couch, In-Ho can't help but smile, “He must've been tired,” he smiled seeing his cat's sleeping figure, you can't help but smile as well upon seeing In-Ho’s smile, his smile is so adorable, the way his eyes would turn into crescent like moons, you just wish that he smiles like that more often, smiling suits him a lot.

He noticed you smiling at him; he quickly changed his expression into a serious one, hoping that you didn't just see him smile all over his cat, Yu-Jin. You chuckled, “It suits you,” you said as you sat down beside him, making him look at you with a cold expression. “Suits me what? ” He asked, looking intensely into your eyes, those eyes that never fail to make him feel that unexplainable feeling. “Smiling.” You teased him as you chuckled. He didn't say anything but just looked at you as he scoffed, “Whatever.” He breathed out. Meanwhile, Yu-Jin decided to interrupt you two; he sat on In-Ho's lap as you leaned a little to pet Yu-Jin, who was more than happy to lay on his back to ask for more. You chuckled as you accidentally brushed your hand on In-Ho's thighs, “I—I’m sorry—! ” You nervously chuckled, he didn't say anything except he just looked at you with such a soft gaze, He sighs as he close his eyes, “We should go,” he said picking Yu-Jin up in his arms like a baby, “Oh- alright, I had a lot of fun with Yu-Jin, Thank you so much for that, In-Ho.” You said as you walked him out of your house, you quickly hurried back to get Yu-Jin's things to give it to In-Ho, “If you ever need someone to look after Yu-Jin whenever you're away, I'm happy to help.” You said as you looked up at him while he returned the gaze, he slightly tilted his head and smirked, “Thank you too, Y/n, I appreciate the help.” you nodded as you watched him walk away leaving you staring at his broad shoulders.

It's almost midnight, and you can't help but think about In-Ho, the way he looks at you... it feels like a burning desire, but neither of you wants to play with it. I mean, who would want to play with fire, right? Right? You groaned as you lay down on your bed, still thinking of the interactions with In-Ho. You fell asleep thinking of him, of In-Ho.

In-Ho couldn't sleep too; he sat in his home office, searching through tons of papers, but his mind is on you, how good you are to him, how he wants to be with you every day, and if he needs to use Yu-Jin as an excuse to see your smile, to hear your angelic voice, to feel your featherlight touches, he'd do it.

—

Author's Note: I liked how my idea turns out, feedbacks and suggestions would be nice though—again I'm sorry for publishing this a bit late, I'm really trying my best to publish some fics at the moment, since I'm on a semestral break lmaoo, Thank you for all of your support! I appreciate it so much! 🖤

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hanniescookie · 20 days ago

Text

love me back - yjh

—⁠☆ when your long forgotten middle school crush walks into your bakery on a random tuesday, your whole life spirals. to top it all, you're forced to be his pretend wife for a mere apartment.

pairing - jeonghan x f!reader

genre/warnings - non idol au, fluff, romance, angst, humor, slice of life, fake dating, one sided love, one sided pining that turns mutual, middle school classmates to strangers to lovers, best friend's cousin kinda situation, cursing, use of petnames, kissing, skinship, mentions of drinking alcohol

wc - 18K

A/N - first of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY @kissbyoon second of all, loud celebrations bcs your girl managed to complete this in time!!! and third of all, a big thank you to @iamdkayyyyy for proofreading/editing this in such a short time! 💌

"Hello Jeonghan. I hope you're having a good time and everything's well. It took me a lot of courage to write this, read it all over again, and finally have it sent to you. This is nothing serious or something grand, but I want to say thank you for taking your time to read this. You might toss it away in the trash can after, but I hope you don't belittle whatever I'm about to write.

I like you. I have liked you since last year. It's very childish to be saying this to someone I've never interacted with (I wish we did) but I'm surprised that I'm finally saying this to you. Even if it's just through a piece of paper, it's still genuine and harmless. You'll probably laugh or roll your eyes at the way I'm writing this, but I seriously hope for nothing in return.

This isn't a confession, and I hold 0% of expectations in me. This is for me. So that I'm relieved later on that there's no more confusion or mixed signals bothering me like it's the end of the world. I already know that you don't reciprocate my feelings, and you really shouldn't anyway. You're doing well with your studies, I hope you continue to top your classes and shine amongst the other students in your way.

This is taking everything in me to say this, but thank you for making me hate Sundays or weekends and love Mondays or days when I could see you. I think you might remember the couple of times we held eye contact or you might have caught me stealing glances at you now and then.

I'm not sure about this, but my friends told you about a girl in their class having a crush on you (and it was none other than me)

I am writing this with no hopes but I do expect an answer for my clarity of mind. Thank you.”

- Y/N

A sigh of relief escapes your lips as the last customer leaves and Seokmin flips the open sign outside your cozy bakery.

You lean against the cool metal of the counter, the sweet scent of flour and sugar enveloping your senses. The evening rush had been crazy, and left you exhausted.

“Alright, Seokmin, almost there!” You call out, wiping down the counter with a practiced hand.

Seokmin is already wrestling with a string of fairy lights near the window. “Just gotta get these stars to hang right! Your friend deserves the best!”

He grins, and you can't help but smile back. He's so kind, and truly the best person you've met ever since you ended college.

It is Seri’s birthday tonight, and you haven't seen her in ages, especially due to the distance of miles stretching between you both and the responsibilities of adult life. However, she had promised she'd celebrate her twenty-third birthday with you.

You disappear into the back, pulling out a small, perfectly frosted strawberry shortcake from the chilled display. It is Seri’s favorite, and you’ve baked it especially for her. You hum a little tune as you carefully place a ‘Happy Birthday’ topper on it, the vibrant red of the strawberries popping against the white cream.

When you return to the front, Seokmin has strung the lights across the bakery, casting a soft, warm glow. He is now fumbling with a handful of balloons. “Thank you, Seokmin. This looks perfect. Just a few more minutes until she gets here.”

Just as you are about to grab a balloon yourself, the little bell above the door jingles. You look up, expecting Seri, and panicking that she's here even before you're done with the decor.

“Oh my goodness, there's no way you're here alr—” Your words get stuck in your throat, forming a hard lump. It feels like a stone, lodged right in the center of your windpipe, making it impossible to breathe.

There's no way you're not hallucinating.

A tall figure steps in, head bent, eyes glued to his phone. He doesn't look up, doesn’t acknowledge you or Seokmin. He just walks inside, making himself a quiet presence as he stops by one of the tables, completely absorbed in his screen.

Your heart, which had been beating with happy anticipation, suddenly feels still, like everything around you has frozen. The soft hum of the refrigerator, the gentle pop of a balloon Seokmin is trying to inflate, even the cheerful glow of the fairy lights—it all fades into the background.

Seven years.

It has been seven years since you last saw Yoon Jeonghan. Your unrequited love for most of your life.

He is older now, of course, and much more handsome. More manly with his hair styled to fall on his forehead. The line of his jaw is sharper, yet his long lashes are just the same.

It is undeniably him.

The boy from middle school, your friend's cousin, the one you’d poured your heart out to in a letter he never answered. He is here, in your bakery, and he hasn't even looked up.

Then, the door opens wide and a happy, familiar voice echoes around the space. “Surprise! Did you miss me?”

It is Seri, her arms wide for a hug. But your excitement, the one that had been bubbling inside you all day, is gone. It had vanished the moment Jeonghan had walked in, silent and oblivious, leaving you to second-guess every emotion you'd stuffed far away in your heart.

Fuck fuck fuck.

You lean against the sink, staring at your reflection. Your cheeks are flushed, and your eyes look dull. That lump in your throat is still there, throbbing with every beat of your heart. You don’t know what you’re supposed to feel about this whole situation. You'd taken a long time to get him off your mind, to forget the fact that he practically ignored your letter that you sent all those years ago. Sure, it was an age of immaturity, but your feelings were as real as your existence. You'd purposefully pushed those feelings down to an untouched corner of your heart, but seeing him now brought everything back in the blink of an eye.

You splash cold water on your face, hoping to wash away the sudden bitterness that has replaced your excitement. Get it together, you tell yourself. It is Seri’s birthday. She deserves your full attention and your genuine happiness. You take a few shaky breaths, trying to push Jeonghan’s presence to the very back of your mind.

When you finally emerge, faking a smile that feels a little too tight, Seri is already pulling Jeonghan towards the small table you’d set up. As you get closer, Seri meets your eyes, and her smile falters just a touch. She pulls you into a quick, tight hug. "I'm so sorry," she whispers into your ear in a low voice. "I'll explain everything. Just trust me, okay?"

She squeezes your hand, her eyes pleading, before pulling back with a bright, "Alright, birthday girl needs cake!"

The small birthday celebration unfolds like a dream you are watching from a distance. Seokmin, bless his heart, starts singing 'Happy Birthday' with gusto, and you join in, your voice a little wobbly at first. The fairy lights twinkle, warming Seri's beaming face as she makes a wish before blowing out the single candle on her strawberry shortcake.

Jeonghan stays relatively quiet, as if he's hardly even here. He doesn't offer much to the conversation, his phone still seeming to hold more of his attention than the small party. But whenever Seri turns to him, asking him a question or nudging him for a laugh, he would respond with a soft, almost warm smile gracing his lips every time.

You watch it all, your throat occasionally constricting whenever your eyes so much as glance at Jeonghan.

Jeonghan—who has re-entered your life out of the blue and is making your heart spin in a painful dance.

The cake is mostly gone, and you are picking at a plate of cookies you’d baked that morning. Seokmin left a while ago, saying his mother was waiting for him, leaving the three of you in the warm glow of your bakery.

Jeonghan is, predictably, back on his phone, his thumb swiping across the screen. You kick Seri under the table, not trying to be gentle at all.

She looks at you with a mischievous glint in her eyes, and you raise an eyebrow in a silent question. What is going on?

Seri bites her lip, trying not to laugh, then quickly clears her throat, pulling Jeonghan’s attention away from his device.

“Jeonghannie,” Seri begins, her voice a little too loud in the sudden silence. He looks up questioningly. “Y/N here could be your wife you know?”

You all but choke on the snickerdoodle you were biting on, a violent cough ripping through you. Your face flushes a furious red, your eyes watering. Wife?

Jeonghan, for the first time, actually looks up from his phone, his expression shifting from absorbed to mildly concerned. He slides a glass of water across the table towards you. “Are you okay?” he asks, his voice sounding almost like a murmur. It's the first time he's directly acknowledged you since he walked in, and it's for something so incredibly embarrassing.

You nod weakly, still sputtering, grabbing the water and gulping it down. To say that your body is on fire would be an understatement.

Seri, meanwhile, looks entirely too pleased with herself. “Look, do you remember her? She's Y/N! She was in my class in middle school.”

“I remember her,” Jeonghan says, and you feel your heart lurch up to your throat. It's like you are being pricked by countless needles as you stare at him in disbelief. He recognises you?

Seri beams, nudging you under the table as if to say What a chance, my girl.

“That's good! Do you remember she used to take acting classes?”

What the fuck? You never took acting classes. Your eyes travel to her face again, avoiding Jeonghan's gaze when it falls on you. You're not sure what to say in such a hideous situation.

“I don't remember that,” Jeonghan mutters plainly. Seri sighs, keeping a hand on yours. You make an effort to shove it away, wanting to yell at her for attempting to plan your demise so casually, but her hold only tightens. “That's alright. You might not remember, but those classes have made Y/N an excellent actor. Hence, she's the perfect choice!”

You fail to keep your voice low, pulling your hand away from hers harshly. “Yoon Seri! What are you talking about?!”

She turns to you, sighing like she had been expecting this outburst. Though a mischievous glint still dances in her eyes. “Okay, calm down. It’s not what you think. Jeonghan just moved to Seoul, right? And he found this amazing apartment, exactly what he wants—super quiet, great location, perfect for him to focus on work.” She pauses, taking a deep breath, and morphing her face in an expression that's almost telling you of her plan. Except, you fail to catch any hints.

“But the landlord is totally old-school. She told him she doesn't rent to single men. She only wants married couples in her building, or at least, long-term, stable pairs. It’s ridiculous, I know! But he’s so frustrated because it’s the only place he likes, and he needs somewhere stable to live while he settles in.”

Oh, no.

You don't like where this is going. You stare in bewilderment, looking between Seri and Jeonghan. He is back to quietly observing, though he still doesn't pick up his phone. He seems to be taking it all in with a nonchalant air, like this wild plan isn't even about him.

“So,” Seri continues, leaning a little forward, “I told him, why don’t you just pretend you’re married? Just for the landlord, just until you sign the lease! He looks like he’s about to lose his mind over it, so we need to help him out. It’s the only way he’s going to get this place.” She turns to Jeonghan. “Right, Jeonghan?”

He offers a small, almost involuntary nod.

In your head, you calculate the distance from your bakery to the nearest graveyard. Because frankly, digging up a grave and burying yourself inside seems like a better option than whatever hell Seri is throwing your way.

You throw your hands up in exasperation, opening your mouth to say something, anything, but what comes out are a few incoherent, broken words.

Jeonghan finally looks at you directly, his eyes sharp and steady. “Listen, it’s Seri’s idea,” he says in a calm voice. “I just… I really like the apartment. And she thinks this is the quickest way to get it. You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. It’s just… for show, for the landlord.” He shrugs slightly. “No pressure.”

His composure, even while Seri is trying to marry him off, is almost comical. He’s so polite, so detached, as if he’s asking if you want sugar with your coffee, not if you’ll be his fake wife.

You stare at him for far too long, trying to take in his words. The whole situation is absurd, and you don't blame yourself for zoning out like this. Only when you hear Jeonghan clear his throat as a result of your direct staring, you come back to your senses. Your cheeks are tinged pink, and you sigh, glaring at your overly smiley friend. She's insane.

“I'll think about it,” you mutter, looking at Jeonghan instead of Seri. You don't want to talk to her for at least a week. She hoots briefly, making you glare at her again. For a second, Jeonghan looks like he wants to say something, but he resorts to sighing and telling Seri that they should leave.

You spend your whole night shifting between sobbing and cursing your friend out.

The smell of yeast and warm butter fills the bakery, comforting the mess in your head only a little. You punch down a large ball of dough with more force than necessary, venting your frustrations to your friend, Eunha, who is meticulously arranging chocolate chips on a tray of cookies.

“I just can’t believe he’s back, Eunha,” you rant, flour dusting your apron. “It’s been seven years! And then he just waltzes in, looking exactly the same, acting like nothing ever happened. Like I didn’t pour my teenage heart out in a letter that he clearly threw in the trash! And he remembers me?!”

For months, you had remembered the letter, the emotions you'd bared, the long, agonizing wait for an answer that never came. It's confusing, and extremely heartbreaking to think that he never cared much to even acknowledge your feelings. And he is back, aware of who you are, but still uncaring of your stupid feelings.

Eunha hums, picking up a rogue chocolate chip. She makes fewer comments while you're talking, only listening to you let it all out. “And then Seri, oh my god, Seri!” You throw your hands up, getting flour everywhere. “She’s a menace! First, she springs him on me, then she tries to marry me off to him for an apartment!” You recount the full story, including Seri’s confession about Jeonghan's strict landlord and her wild idea of a fake marriage. “When I called her afterwards, she was all, ‘But you’re not over him! This is your chance!’ Like it’s some kind of rom-com! It’s ridiculous, Eunha. I don’t even know what to feel. My heart’s a mess, and my brain is just… freezing. I don't know how to take this all in.”

Eunha bites her lip, trying to suppress a smile as she comes behind you and begins massaging your shoulders in an effort to relax you. “She’s trying to help, in her way. She wants you to be happy.”

“But I get it. It’s a lot. And you haven’t exactly been planning your future with Jeonghan have you?”

You knead the dough vigorously. “Exactly! I’ve built this bakery, this life, and I pushed him into a tiny, dusty corner of my memory. Now he’s back, and it’s like everything’s flipped upside down.”

Eunha pouts, opening her mouth to offer some more words of comfort when the little bell above the door jingles. You freeze, heart leaping into your throat as your eyes witness Jeonghan stepping inside. He spots you and Eunha, and a polite, almost sheepish expression crosses his face. “Hey,” he greets, his voice soft as usual, “Seri told me to pick something up from here. A bracelet or something? She said you'd know.”

You stare at him, taking a second to process what he's said. “A bracelet?”

Eunha seems to be having fun, you can tell by her suppressed laughter, as she gives you a quick, encouraging pat on the back.

“Yeah, she said she left it here,” Jeonghan says, shrugging his shoulders. You sigh, already looking around the counter to look for the said bracelet. You don't remember finding any, and a part of you knows that this might be one of Seri’s games.

“Just a second. I’ll call her.” You mutter, looking at Jeonghan briefly before sidling away to dial her. Meanwhile, Eunha awkwardly greets Jeonghan because standing there is a little awkward.

“Seri! What did you tell Jeonghan to pick up from here?” You hiss into the phone, trying to keep your voice down.

Seri’s voice crackles through the phone, sounding sheepish. “Oh! Right! My bad! I thought I left my bracelet there when we were cleaning up last night, but I just found it in my room. Tell him he doesn’t need to get it anymore.”

You stare at the phone, then at Jeonghan, who is patiently waiting and seemingly unbothered. You pinch the bridge of your nose, trying not to pull at your hair. “She found it. It was in her room.”

Jeonghan nods slowly, and takes a small step back, ready to leave. “Okay. Thanks.”

He turns to go, but then he hesitates. He stops, his shoulders tensing slightly, and turns back to face you. Eunha perceptively sees the shift in the air. With a reassuring squeeze of your arm, she slips out of the bakery, leaving you alone with him.

Could you die instead of being alone here with him? That sounds fairer honestly.

Jeonghan looks at you, his quiet gaze more direct this time. “About what Seri said… the apartment thing,” he begins in a low voice. “You don’t have to do it. It’s… it could be weird, I understand.” His eyes soften slightly. “It was just Seri’s crazy idea. Don’t feel pressured.”

You blink at him, letting your brain load to process his words. For a moment, you consider just nodding and letting him leave, letting the awkwardness disappear with him.

However, seeing him walk towards the door feels like a stab to your already broken heart. You imagine what will happen if he leaves your bakery now—you will never get the chance to know what it feels like to be married to your lifelong crush. He'll leave, and you'll likely see him here and there but you'll never have the chance to be close to him.

The thought sends you into a spiral, and you take a deep breath, a surprising calm settling over you.

“No, wait.” You call out, your voice louder than intended. You even manage a small, genuine smile. “I’ll do it. It’s not a big deal.”

A wave of genuine surprise crosses Jeonghan's face, followed by that rare, soft smile you'd last seen when he was a teenager. What surprises you is the fact that it still twists your heart the same way it did all those years ago.

“Are you sure?” He asks, “You don't have to. It's not like—”

“It's alright. I’ll do it since Seri said it's the perfect apartment for you. I know how hard it is to find good living spaces in Seoul. I'd have loved it if somebody helped me while I was searching for apartments too.” You say, surprised at your own speech. A little blush creeps up your cheeks. “So… it's fine. I can help you.”

He looks at you for a long moment with a genuine, albeit short-lived, smile now playing on his lips. “Thank you,” he utters, and gives a slight bow of his head, “I'll see you later.” Then he turns and walks out, the bell jingling softly behind him.

You stand there, amidst the scent of chocolate and dough. Eunha runs back in, asking you questions and trying to shake you back to consciousness, but you just stare into nothingness, a small, idiotic smile blooming on your face.

For the first time since Yoon Jeonghan has walked back into your life, you don't feel completely lost.

The sharp ping of your phone wakes you, pulling you from a hazy dream of perfect pastries. You blink, reaching for it on your nightstand. With a foggy mind, you pinch one eye open to look at your screen.

Unknown Contact: Good morning, Y/N. This is Jeonghan. Got your number from Seri. I was wondering if you are free today. The landlord wants to sign the lease for the apartment.

With widened eyes, your phone drops from your hands right on top of your face. A painful gasp rips from your throat, and you slowly sit upright, wincing and rubbing your poor nose.

You jolt when your phone buzzes again, signaling another text.

Unknown Contact: It's alright if you're not available. Just let me know, and I'll try rescheduling.

Oh no. Shit.

Today? Your schedule is packed, a new batch of sourdough to prep, and custom orders to finish. You are definitely not free. But a strange thrill runs through you.

This is it, the first real step into this bizarre adventure that might give you a chance to taste the sweetness of being with your life-long crush (as crazy as it sounds).

You take a few deep breaths, giving yourself mental pats before typing on your phone with trembling hands.

You: Good morning! Yes, I am. Just let me know when and where.

You have to be crazy for this.

The next thing you do is immediately call Seokmin. “Hey, Seokmin! Super sorry about this, but can you handle things at the bakery today? Something urgent came up.” Seokmin, being the gem he is, readily agrees.

You push off your covers, a sudden burst of energy propelling you out of bed. You spend extra time on your hair, curling it into soft, brown waves, and pick out an outfit that feels effortlessly elegant but still approachable—a soft, flowy dress, a little more dressed up than your usual bakery outfit. You even add a touch of subtle makeup, something you rarely bother with unless it's a special occasion.

Standing in front of your full-length mirror, you take a quick picture and send it to Eunha.

You: How do I look? Too much? Not enough?

Eunhie 😻: You look like a WIFE. Go get him, bunny!

You laugh almost nervously. A wife. The word feels foreign and exciting all at once.

The apartment building is in a quiet, older part of Seoul, its red bricks covered in ivy. Your eyes fall on Jeonghan standing by the entrance, dressed simply in a dark shirt and neat trousers, looking effortlessly put together. He is on his phone, of course, but as you approach, he looks up, and for the first time, you feel his eyes see you. A flicker of something, maybe surprise, passes through them before he gives you a small, polite smile.

“Hi,” you say, feeling a blush creep up your neck.

“Hi,” he replies, his voice calm. “Thanks for coming. She’s waiting inside.” He gestures to the door, but just as you turn, his hand grabs yours. “Wait.”

You feel a flutter in your chest, briefly glancing at your intertwined hands before looking up into his eyes. He silently takes something out of his pocket and extends it towards you. Your eyes widen, fixed on the velvet box clutched in his hand. ��This is your ring. Wear it.”

Your gaze sweeps across the shining band on his own finger, and you blink, staring up at him in astonishment. He went as far as to buy actual rings?

Your throat runs dry, but you silently take the box and pray to God you don't look stupid blushing over fake rings. “You didn't have to…go that far.”

“It would've looked suspicious if we didn't have rings. One visible sign of marriage, you know?” He says, smiling gently and you can't help but want to be the reason behind all his smiles. “Shall we go?” He asks, breaking your tiny reverie, and you slip on the ring quickly before nodding.

You're wearing a wedding ring. Your husband is Yoon Jeonghan.

How crazy can life be?

You follow him into a small, immaculately clean lobby. An older woman with kind, sharp eyes is sitting behind a desk, clutching a stack of papers. She seems like someone who would prepare soup for her grandchildren but would not let strangers have a sip of water from her home.

She looks up as you enter, her gaze sweeping over both of you, lingering on your dress and the way you stand just a little closer to Jeonghan than necessary.

“Mr. Yoon,” she says, her voice warm, but with an underlying firmness. You're surprised to see her address Jeonghan formally. “And this must be your… wife?” She raises an eyebrow at you, and your world spins a little faster. Is she able to see right through your act? That's the last thing you want right now, because Jeonghan losing this apartment would be a direct result of your cover being busted. You cannot let that happen.

You quietly slip closer to him, your hand barely brushing against his warm one. It's taking everything in you not to just hold it, and you can feel your heartbeat in your throat.

Jeonghan turns to you, a soft, natural smile appearing on his face. With a calm smile on his face, he gently interlocks his fingers with yours. His touch is warm, surprisingly solid. All your world comes undone, and you resist the urge to flinch, instead squeezing his hand subtly in return. If someone were to ask you how you'd like to die, you'd say this—with your hand held in Jeonghan's soft hold and his eyes smiling down at you (even if it's a pretense).

“Yes Mrs Lee,” Jeonghan says smoothly, his gaze shifting towards his landlord. “This is Y/N. My wife.”

Wife.

There's a sharp pang in your heart at the mention of the word, at the whole situation because it dawns on you that this is not real. You force a bright smile, letting your hand link through his. “It’s lovely to finally meet you, Mrs Lee. Jeonghan has told me so much about this wonderful building.” You feel a ridiculous urge to giggle at the lie, but you keep your expression sweet.

Mrs Lee’s gaze softens. “Yes, well, it is a quiet building. Family-oriented. We like to keep it that way.” She looks at your joined hands, then back at your face with a satisfied nod. “Please, sit. Let’s go over the paperwork.”

As she shuffles papers, Jeonghan squeezes your hand again, sending a jolt of electricity up your spine. You feel a strange sense of partnership, like you’re keeping his secret, and Lord knows you’d take it to your grave if it means keeping Jeonghan happy.

His arm brushes yours as he leans in slightly to point at a clause on the lease. You find yourself leaning in too, close enough to catch the subtle scent of his cologne. It is a new smell, mature and clean. Not that you ever smelled him back in your teenage years, you'd always believed he smelled like vanilla. Now he smells more like a faint hint of cedar and fresh laundry, a scent that somehow suits the mature man he has become.

The landlord eventually hands Jeonghan the keys with a broad smile. “Welcome to the building, Mr. and Mrs. Yoon!” she says, her wrinkles deepening as she smiles.

You feel a rush of adrenaline coursing through your veins, yet you find yourself choking back a laugh. Jeonghan's lips twitch slightly in amusement as he gives Mrs Lee a polite bow, and you mirror it, feeling a mix of relief and exhilaration.

Well, now this is a strange beginning.

The days that follow the apartment signing are a mix of many emotions. You often stay busy at the bakery and curse Seri out every waking moment, but you can't deny it when she says, “Stop acting like you're not enjoying this, honey.”

Because yes, you are. You are enjoying it a lot. Jeonghan hadn't been in your life for seven years, and now, suddenly, he is everywhere in your head. You often find yourself crying with the uncertainty of your future, but his being back also excites you every second.

Although you haven't seen him since, a part of you is relieved by the silence. But there's also the anticipation of what's next eating you up every now and then.

Had the fake-marriage thing ended with the lease? You aren’t sure, and the uncertainty, rather than fading, just keeps growing. It is frustrating, irritating, and a little bit thrilling how easily Jeonghan slipped back into your thoughts, claiming more space than he ever had before. You are a fool, you know it, but some part of you just can't help it.

It's one such Friday when orders are piling up at the bakery, the coffee machine is sputtering, and a line of impatient customers stretches out the door. You are elbow-deep in flour, trying to manage three things at once, when your phone buzzes in your apron pocket. You wipe your hands quickly and pull it out.

Yoon Menace 🤬: Jeonghan is moving his stuff today. The landlady might get suspicious. It'd be nice if you dropped by ;)

Yoon Menace 🤬: I told him to call you but you know how he is

Yoon Menace 🤬: Doesn't wanna trouble you more and all, stupid

Your heart jumps into your throat, and while your brain tells you to just shut the fuck up and focus on work, your heart screams otherwise. You know this is another one of Seri’s schemes. You know you shouldn't be indulging in this. You know it will hurt you. But the temptation of tasting marriage with Jeonghan is too much. Your friend is trying to set you up, like she promised all those years ago. So why should you not go with this?

“Seokmin!” you yell over the din of the bakery, grabbing your purse. “I have to go right now!”

Seokmin looks up from where he's wiping one of the tables, bewildered by your sudden urgency. “Go? What about the…?” He gestures wildly at the overflowing counters.

“Just handle it, please. Call me if anything explodes! I’ll be back as soon as I can!” You’re already halfway to the door, shrugging on your jacket. You don't even think twice. The bakery, the customers, the endless tasks—it all has vanished from your mind. For some foolish, inexplicable reason, Jeonghan is more important. You are leaving everything behind, rushing into the unknown, just like the absolute fool you are.

You barge in through the door of Jeonghan’s apartment building, heart hammering crazily against your ribs. Up the stairs you fly, your lungs burning, until you reach his floor. The door to his apartment is wide open, and Jeonghan is in the middle of the living room, wrestling with what looks like a flat-pack bookshelf, a tangle of wooden pieces and metal rods surrounding him. Boxes are everywhere, stacked against walls, spilling open with clothes and books, and a half-eaten instant noodle cup sits precariously on a wobbling stack. He is wearing an old, faded t-shirt and sweatpants, his dark hair falling over his forehead as he grunts with effort.

You're just admiring him when he looks up, startled by your sudden entrance, a spanner still clutched in his hand. His eyebrows furrow in confusion. “Y/N? What—what are you doing here?”

You walk further in, trying to catch your breath, the absurdity of the situation hitting you. “Seri… Seri texted me,” You gasp out, pointing accusingly at your phone. “She said the landlady was here and getting suspicious again and that you needed me.”

There's a pause and Jeonghan just blinks, then a soft, disbelieving chuckle escapes him. He actually laughs, a genuine, light laugh that makes the tension in your chest ease just a fraction. “The landlady?” he repeats, shaking his head. “Why would she be here? I just signed the lease, and she seemed perfectly happy. She has no reason to be here.” He walks over to a box and places the spanner down, muttering under his breath. “Seri’s too much.”

You don't quite hear him, but then he turns to you, his face softening. “I’m sorry she bothered you. You didn’t have to rush over. I'm already grateful that you decided to help me.”

A wave of disappointment washes over you. Were you expecting to have another chance to play marriage with him? You’d left your entire bakery in Seokmin’s hands for this. Delusional. Stupid.

“Oh,” you mumble, your voice laced with awkwardness. The initial rush of adrenaline drains away, leaving you feeling foolish. The silence stretches in the wrecked apartment, filled only by the distant sounds of city traffic. You glance at the mess, clearing your throat. “Well, now that I’m here,” you offer, trying to salvage the situation, “do you need any help? It looks like you’ve got your hands full.”

Jeonghan looks at the scattered furniture parts, then back at you, a small, grateful smile appearing on his lips. “Actually, yes. If you don’t mind of course. This thing is surprisingly complicated.” He points to a small wooden piece. “Could you hold this while I try to line up the screw?”

You feel a deep flutter in your heart, and you only try to chastise yourself for it—God knows you'd fall to your knees for this man. Stepping closer, you kneel beside him as he bends over the half-built bookshelf. You hold the piece steady, your fingers brushing against his occasionally as he maneuvers the screw. You are focused, trying to be helpful, when suddenly a sharp pain shoots through your eye.

“Aagh!” you yelp, dropping the wooden piece and clutching your eye, trying to blink. Something tiny, probably a bit of sawdust or a stray fiber, has flown into it. This is so embarrassing.

“Hey,” Jeonghan immediately straightens up, his hands reaching for you. “What happened?” He gently pulls your hand away from your face, his touch surprisingly tender. He leans in, his gaze fixed on your eye, trying to see.

You find yourself leaning back against the wall, his face incredibly close, and his breath warm against your cheek. The subtle scent of his cologne envelops you, your heartbeat skyrocketing. You are acutely aware of the warmth of his fingers on your face, the concentration in his eyes, and it's making you weak in the knees.

He tilts your head slightly, his other hand coming up to gently part your eyelid. Just as he leans even closer, his face inches from yours in an attempt to get a better look, the apartment door, which you’d left ajar, swings open wider.

“Oh, great heavens!”

You take a second too long to step out of the spell Jeonghan's proximity has put you in, and you notice him calmly turning to look at the doorway. Your head spins seeing Mrs Lee stand there, with another woman beside her arm—someone who looks alarmingly similar to Jeonghan.

“I know you two are newly married,” Mrs Lee’s voice chimes in a little awkwardly, and she chuckles, “but you really shouldn’t leave the door open like that!”

Heat creeps up your neck as you realize that the posture you were in might've looked wrong. You bite your lip, blood rushing up to your cheeks as you watch Jeonghan clear his throat. For some reason, he still looks calm.

“It's not like that,” Jeonghan says, rubbing a hand on the nape of his neck. “We weren't—”

“Oh, I know a thing or two about how passionate young kids are!” Mrs Lee laughs, making you almost choke on nothing. Passionate?!

“Mom? What are you doing here?”

Your eyes fly to look at Jeonghan who’s staring at his mom, showing no major signs of shock even though his tone betrays him. The other woman is his mom?!

Well, here goes nothing.

The silence in the small café is borderline suffocating. You sit opposite Jeonghan’s mother, a latte forgotten in front of you. Jeonghan is right beside you, surprisingly nonchalant, swirling the ice in his glass of americano. His mother simply observes the two of you with a gaze that's steady as well as bewildered.

She finally takes a slow sip of her tea, her eyes still fixed on you. You mirror her, taking a nervous gulp of your coffee, feeling like a deer caught in headlights. Jeonghan, however, remains outwardly calm, as if this is just a normal Friday afternoon.

“So,” she begins, her voice cutting through the awkward silence like a knife. “You two are… married.” Her gaze shifts to Jeonghan and stays there for a second too long. “And you didn’t think to tell me, Jeonghan? Your own mother?” You sense a tremor of hurt beneath her controlled tone. “No ceremony, no announcement? Just… suddenly married?”

You open your mouth, ready to blurt out the truth, to explain to the landlord, the apartment, the whole fake situation you're in. But Jeonghan's touch snatches away any words from your tongue.

He reaches under the table, his fingers finding yours and lacing them together firmly. You gulp, staring at him in surprise as you try not to focus on the way your heartbeat has quickened drastically.

Jeonghan clears his throat, his gaze meeting his mother’s. His expression is unreadable, perhaps a shade colder than it had been when he was helping you with your eye. “Mom, we got married about three weeks ago,” he says, his voice even, almost detached. “It was very sudden. And I know I should have told you, but honestly, you wouldn’t have cared much anyway, would you?”

You widen your eyes at his words, specifically at his tone. He didn't sound angry, just resigned, like hope is something he doesn't look at.

“Besides,” he continues with a faint, almost sarcastic edge to his tone, “you’ve always wanted me to settle down. So, it’s good, right? Your wish came true.”

His mother flinches slightly at his words, a flash of hurt crossing her face before she quickly masks it. She looks at your intertwined hands, then back at Jeonghan. You can sense a complex mix of confusion, disappointment, and perhaps even a bit of sadness in her eyes.

Jeonghan doesn't wait for her to respond. He abruptly stands up, pulling you gently with him. “Let's go.”

“I’ll see you later, Mom. Y/N has to get back to the bakery, and I still have so much unpacking to do. Have a good afternoon.”

Before she can utter another word, he is guiding you out of the café, leaving her sitting alone at the small table, her untouched tea cooling in front of her. The noise of the city rushes in, distracting you from the heavy silence you’d just left behind. You don't look back.

The bustling street feels like a different world. Jeonghan still holds your hand, his grip loose but present as he walks through the sparse crowd. He hasn’t said a word since pulling you out, and you are too busy trying to process what has just happened, and also the feel of his hand in yours.

He finally stops by a small potted plant on the sidewalk, letting go of your hand to run a hand through his hair. “I’m truly sorry about that,” he says, his voice low, his eyes avoiding yours as he stares at the plant. “My mom… she’s been really pushing me to get married.”

Your eyes widen for a second at his words, but you don't say a word. Jeonghan continues, his voice quieter than before. “She wants me to… well, she’s been trying to get me to marry someone with family connections. Someone who could help with her family’s old business, get them some kind of tax break or investment benefit if I were linked to a certain family. She thinks it would solve all their financial worries, even if it’s outdated thinking. She brings it up every time we talk.”

He becomes silent for a second too long, and you get a chance to take in his words. There's so much you don't know about him, so much you might never know.

He finally looks at you, but this time with a bit of frustration in his eyes. “It’s why I hadn’t even told her I was back in Seoul properly, let alone about the apartment. She just showed up.”

“And now,” he adds with a tired sigh, “I’ve dragged you into this. I’m really and truly sorry, Y/N. This is a complete mess, and it’s my fault.”

You blink at him, and instantly shake your head, cutting him off before he can apologize further. You are still a fool, but you’re a willing one.

“Hey,” you say softly, reaching out to gently touch his arm. “Don’t apologize. We got the apartment, right? And we saved you from… well, from that.” You gesture vaguely in the direction of the café. “It’s fine. Seriously. I told you, I’ll help you out.”

He looks at you for a moment, something like gratitude surfacing in his eyes. He seems like he wants to say something more but he just smiles softly and mutters a thanks.

You realize you have never seen a smile more beautiful. You also realize that you're in love with Jeonghan again.

And he isn't.

Again.

“So you're telling me that this isn't just about the landlady? And you're going to continue this act in front of his family?!”

You sigh, whining as you drop yourself on the couch beside Eunha. “His friends too? Probably anyone he knows? I don't know. I- I just don't know anything.”

Eunha hums, shutting her laptop and fully turning to you. “It’s okay. You've been handling this well. And you will, I know.”

You chew on your lip, humming absentmindedly. Even though you trust Eunha, you aren't sure how well you've been handling it. So far, you've only found yourself to be stupid.

She leans forward, her tone turning softer, more serious. “Listen, I know this is wild, and your heart is probably doing gymnastics right now. But—” she pauses, keeping a hand on your cold one. “This is a temporary gig for him. He needs this for his apartment, for his mom's whatever benefits.”

You interrupt, “Exactly! And I’m out here fantasizing this whole thing like a teenager.” Eunha chuckles, squeezing your face between her palms fondly. “So what? You ride this wave, you help him out, and you see where it goes. But what's important is to keep your feet on the ground. You should not expect anything from him.”

“That’s what I'm failing at,” you whisper, the excitement and fear battling inside you. It feels like a lost war. “I feel like I’ve rekindled all those feelings and this time it’s even worse.”

Eunha coos, squeezing your hand. “Then you deal with it, just like you always do. You’re not that insecure middle schooler anymore. You’re a successful bakery owner, you’re strong, you’re determined. And you’ve got me to slap some sense into you if you need it.”

“But also, what if it’s different this time? What if this actually gives me a chance I never thought I’d get?”

You look at her, then down at your hands. The idea of a chance feels terrifying and exhilarating all at once. “So, I just… keep pretending?”

“You keep pretending for him, and you figure out what you want for you,” Eunha says, opening a soda can and extending it towards you. “This is your story, Y/N. You get to decide how it ends. Just don't forget it's a performance for them, but a real experience for you. Make sure you get what you need out of it too.” She sighs once you absentmindedly take the can from her, and grins. “Maybe try fake kissing next time. For research purposes, of course.”

You groan, throwing another cushion at her, a laugh finally bubbling up your throat. She laughs with you, still teasing you about how red your cheeks are at the mention.

Jeonghan [💌]: Hey. Hope you're alright. I am hosting a housewarming party this Saturday and I'd love for you to come. Not for pretense or anything, I'm not about to put you in trouble again (sorry about that) ⁠^⁠‿⁠^ I'm just really thankful, and it'd be fun if you could just come as my friend. Of course, if you're free!

You nearly drop your phone into the newly made batter with a yelp that causes Seokmin to run towards you. “What? What happened? Are you okay?”

You stare aimlessly at the counter, your mouth slightly parted as the text constantly flickers in front of your eyes.

“Y/N?” Seokmin pokes your shoulder again, concern etched on his face. You look at him with widened eyes, “Huh?”

“You screamed…and now you've zoned out. Is everything alright?” He asks, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

Under normal circumstances, you'd laugh and tease Seokmin about how easily worried he is, but you're currently not under normal circumstances.

Jeonghan inviting you to his housewarming party as a friend doesn't count as normal.

“Yeah,” you let out, absentmindedly. “I'm okay. Uh—would you finish this batch for me? I need to go make a call.”

He smiles, instantly nodding at you like the sunshine that he is. “Of course!”

Without another word, you run out to take a breath of fresh air and to possibly scream over the phone with Eunha.

I should go back.

That’s the only constant chant in your head as you stand in front of Jeonghan’s apartment door, your heart drumming against your ribs. You don’t even know what you’re so nervous for—perhaps it’s the sheer force of your emotions that have started to mess with your head more than ever before, or perhaps it’s just the fact that you’re Jeonghan’s friend.

You’re not about to knock when the door swings open. Jeonghan stands there, wearing a simple, dark t-shirt that makes you feel a bit overdressed, a warm smile gracing his lips. You think he looks genuinely happy to see you, but maybe you’ve just mastered the art of delusion.

Before you can even utter a greeting, Seri practically materializes beside him, launching herself at you in a bear hug. “Y/N! You made it! I knew you would!” And on she goes telling everyone about how amazing your sourdough is. She introduces you to everyone in the apartment that is buzzing with people, while your eyes have a way to keep finding Jeonghan.

Looking at him, you don’t even know if you want him in your life forever, or if you want him to disappear from your sight. It’s a strange push and pull of your heart, one whose strings are intricately being tangled each time you glance at him and find him not looking at you.

His friends are all genuinely nice, and you find yourself enjoying their company despite being an introvert. Seri keeps you engaged for most of the night, helping you socialize and warm up in front of people you don’t know.

It’s safe to say you’re fine until you see Jeonghan across the room, by the kitchen counter, laughing at something a girl says. She is pretty, with long, dark hair, and she is leaning in close, her hand resting lightly on his arm as they talk. He’s smiling that soft, genuine smile, the one you’d only seen a few times, usually directed at Seri. And suddenly, everything you’d been fine about weighs heavily on your chest. The bitterness you’d felt that first day, when he walked into your bakery, returns with a vengeance.

You drift towards the drinks table, grabbing a cup and filling it liberally. One drink turns into two, then three. You laugh louder at jokes, chime into conversations more often, trying to drown out the disturbing unease in your chest. The alcohol blurs the edges of the room, making everyone seem a little funnier, a little friendlier. You stop noticing the girl by the counter, or at least, you try to.

Hours later, the party has mellowed, the music has turned softer, and your laughter is a bit more slurred. You are swaying slightly, leaning against Seri, who looks just as tipsy.

“How… how are you gonna get home, Y/N?” Seri giggles, slurring her words slightly. “You’re, like, properly sloshed.”

You giggle back, waving a dismissive hand. You look around the room, pointing. “Seungcheol? Nope, he’s hammered. Jisoo? Definitely not. Soonyoung? He’s probably going to dance his way home.” You scan the remaining few, all looking thoroughly relaxed and well-hydrated with alcohol. Your finger finally lands on Jeonghan, who is sitting quietly on the sofa, nursing a glass of water, and looking remarkably sober.

“Him,” you declare, pointing a wobbly finger. “Jeonghan. He’s sober. He can drive.”

You don’t really know what Seri says beside you, because even in your drunken state, the blurred vision of Jeonghan’s smile makes you lose sense of yourself. You stare at him, head clouded with the dire need of being enveloped in his warmth even as he bends near you, calling out your name.

A sudden hit on your head by Seri breaks your magical bubble, and reality crashes down on you like a truck. You respond to Jeonghan in a broken hum, standing up from your place and stumbling right into him. Quick to his reflexes, he holds you in place, his hand feeling too warm against your clothed back. “Be careful.”

You try to ignore the incessant drumming of your heart and nod before zoning out for a while. Seri shoves at your shoulder again. “Go home! He’s waiting to drop you off.”

You blink at your surroundings again, “Yeah, yeah. Let’s go.”

Jeonghan's hand is warm on your arm, guiding you steadily out of his apartment. Your legs feel a bit like jelly, and you lean into his solid presence more than you intend to. He doesn't seem to mind, his grip firm but gentle as he steers you down the quiet hallway.

He opens the passenger door of a sleek, dark car—a model you don't recognize but instantly categorize as 'expensive and very Jeonghan.'

You practically tumble into the seat, groaning at your clumsiness. Without a warning, Jeonghan leans over you, the subtle scent of his cologne filling the small space. Your breath hitches, blinking up at his close face. He reaches across your chest to pull the seat belt, and for a long moment, his arm is pressed against you, his face impossibly close to yours. Your drunken eyes flicker to his lips, then back to his steady gaze and you want to curse yourself in every language known to mankind.

Every fiber of your being screams at you to just lean in, to close the minuscule gap between you. Your mind is a messy battlefield of drunken desire and years of unrequited longing. However, just as the click of the seatbelt echoes loudly in the quiet car, your spell breaks. He pulls back just as easily as he’d leaned in, settling into the driver's seat. “Put in your address.”

“Just drive to my bakery, I live a block down from it,” you say, looking out the window.

The drive is smooth, the late-night city lights blurring into streaks of color outside your window. In the silence, you're feeling incredibly mellow, and the alcohol has likely loosened your tongue because you find yourself making small talk that you never would, otherwise.

“Have you ever liked someone?” you ask, the words spilling out before you can stop them.

Jeonghan glances at you for just a second, his hands steady on the wheel. “Sure,” he says, his voice even yet laced with a tiny ounce of amusement. “Everyone does.”

“No, I mean… really liked someone,” you press, leaning your head against the cool window. “Like, they take over your brain. Make you crazy.”

He hums softly in a way that tells you he’s never really been hit by that force of emotions. “It’s been a while since I’ve thought about that.”

His statement feels like a dagger twisted at your heart. Your neck cranes to look at him, and your wretched heart screams for you to lessen the burden of your heart—one you’ve been carrying for years.

You wish to yell and dump your emotions on him, but instead, all that leaves your mouth is nothing close to the many jumbled words residing in your head. “You’re a bad guy, you know,” you slur slightly, looking at his profile in the dim light of the dashboard. “You don’t even know how much of a bad guy you are.”

He looks at you surprised, then he chuckles as if he knows you’re just drunk-talking. “Yet I am the one who’s dropping you home.” You turn to look at him again, slightly astonished that he’s just said something more than small talk. A joke, a teasing statement. It stirs your emotions once again, making your head spin heavily as the car pulls up in front of your apartment building. Jeonghan parks, then turns off the engine. He gets out and walks around to your side of the car, all the while with your eyes following his movement. The door to your side opens, and he leans in without warning again.

“We’re here,” he says, his voice almost a low murmur as he reaches past you, his hand brushing you as he attempts to unbuckle your seatbelt. He's right above you, his shadow enveloping you, that mature, clean scent filling your senses again. You don’t even feel your heart pounding at this point—perhaps you’re far too drunk, or full of emotions, or something in between.

“There’s something I’ve wanted to do,” you whisper and Jeonghan’s eyes lift from the seatbelt to meet yours, the click of it resounding in the quiet night, “all my life.”

He tilts his head slightly, his expression curious. “What is it?” he asks, his voice soft, like he’s being gentle with your drunk self, like he’s trying to take care of you. It breaks your heart and fills it with love at the same time. You’re sure your sober self wouldn’t blame you for not answering with words. You lift your head, reaching for him, and press your lips against his.

Jeonghan freezes like a statue carved from astonishment. His eyes are wide, unblinking, staring into the dim space beside your head. He feels the light press of your mouth, tasting faintly of the sweet, fruity drink you'd been consuming all night, the gentle shift as you slump against him, and then, nothing.

You're completely out.

He stands there for a beat longer, the shock slowly giving way to bewilderment. Your head is resting awkwardly against his cheek, your lips still slightly parted against his. Your breath is soft and even against his skin, and he can feel the weight of your body slumping against his, completely relaxed. He shifts carefully, trying not to disturb you. Your head lolls slightly, making the gentle pressure on his lips deepen for a fleeting second before settling again.

For the first time in his life, Jeonghan finds himself utterly lost on what to do next.

The morning sun feels like a thousand tiny needles stabbing into your brain. A dull, throbbing ache pulses behind your eyes, and you groan, pulling the blanket further over your head, only to be met with a cheerful, obnoxious hum right next to your ear.

“Rise and shine, sleepyhead!” Seri’s voice, annoyingly bright, pierces through your headache. “Someone had a very good time last night, didn’t they?”

You peel one eye open. Seri is perched on the edge of your bed with a glass of water and a painkiller in her hand, a triumphant grin plastered across her face.

“Ugh,” you mumble, pushing yourself up, the world spinning for a dizzying moment. “What are you doing here? And please, for the love of all that is holy, lower your voice.” You take the water and pill gratefully.

“I’m here to make sure my little friend survived her first housewarming party with her fake husband,” Seri chirps, completely ignoring your request. “And let me tell you, you were out cold. Jeonghan practically carried you to your door. I told him he could just leave you, but he was all gentlemanly about it.” She pokes your cheek. “You looked like a baby.”

You feel the pill somewhat stick itself in your throat as her words slice through your foggy head. A memory, fragmented and hazy but terrifyingly real, flashes through your mind and you choke. Seri rushes to your side in a second, patting your back as you unwillingly gulp down some water. Any of her motherly rants fall on deaf ears because all that your head is wrapped around is one fact.

You kissed Jeonghan.

Well, it doesn’t have to be a big deal.

The fact that you were drunk and kissed your crush of years doesn’t have to be a big deal. As long as you ghost him and gracefully exit his life, it won't be a hindrance.

Except your life isn't very nice towards you, because the first customer that walks into your bakery the next morning is Jeonghan's mother. Additionally, what she's saying is something that’s completely against your plan.

“I’ve been trying to reach Jeonghan all morning, but he seems to be quite busy. Typical, of course.”

We’re planning a family trip to a resort. Just for a few days next month. It’s important for families to spend time together, wouldn’t you agree? Especially new family members.” She emphasizes with a slight tilt of her head and you're certain if you were holding something, you'd have dropped it. “And of course, Jeonghan needs to come. And naturally, we expect his… wife to be there.”

Her words hang in the air like a trap, making your heart thud louder against your chest. “Oh, a resort trip,” you manage to say, trying to sound enthusiastic. “That sounds lovely.”

“It is,” she affirms, with a faint smile gracing her lips. “We always ensure we have the best amenities, of course. Nothing less for the family. I’ve booked enough rooms. I just need to confirm your availability so I can finalize the arrangements. I trust you can clear your schedule? Jeonghan tells me your work here is quite flexible.”

You bite back a retort. Flexible? You work seventeen-hour days and haven’t taken a proper vacation in years. But saying no would blow your cover, and somehow, the thought of letting Jeonghan down feels worse than a forced resort trip with his subtly judging mother.

“I… I’ll need to check my calendar,” you say, forcing another smile. “And I’ll let Jeonghan know so he can coordinate with you.”

She nods with a satisfied look on her face. “Excellent. Do let me know as soon as you can. Jeonghan needs to attend, and you know how he can be, sometimes needing a gentle push. I’ll send you the details. I look forward to spending some quality time with my son and his lovely wife.”

Well, it is a big deal after all.

You bid goodbye to a bright Seokmin, wearily grabbing your bag to tuck it over your shoulder. You haven't even stepped out when the bell jingles and you turn, your heart nearly jumping up to your throat. Standing there, looking distinctly out of place, is Jeonghan. He isn't on his phone this time. His hands are stuffed into his pockets, and his gaze, usually so composed, darts nervously around the street before settling on you.

"Hey," he says, his voice a little higher than usual. He clears his throat. "Rough day?"

You can't believe you're seeing him right now. You'd believed you'd never have to, or if in case you do, you'll profusely apologize. But there's no acknowledgement of the kiss, and it doesn't even feel like he plans to bring it up.

“Something like that," you reply, swallowing thickly, suddenly hyper-aware of his presence. "Listen," he starts, taking a step closer, then stopping. He runs a hand through his hair, looking utterly un-Jeonghan-like in his disarray. "My mom… she came by, didn't she? About the… the trip."

You nod slowly. "She did."

"Right. Look, you don't have to go," he blurts out, the words tumbling over each other. "Seriously. It's just her. She gets like that. She means well, but… It's too much. You have your work, you're busy. You don't need to put up with her just because… because of this pretense. You really don't have to do anything. I mean, it's fine. It's really fine if you just… say no. To her. Or to me. I wouldn't blame you." He looks at everything but you, his gaze darting from a display of croissants to the fairy lights you haven't taken down yet. He is babbling. Jeonghan, the perpetually calm, quiet Jeonghan, is babbling.

He doesn't know how he's supposed to come to terms with the fact that he has spent his entire Sunday agonizing over a mere kiss. Not even a kiss. A press of lips against his own. He doesn't know how to look you in your eyes and ask you to pretend to be his wife again for a stupid trip his mom cannot let go of. He doesn't know how he'll take that without thinking about you incessantly.

You don’t understand where he's coming from, but seeing him in this state pulls a foolish smile on your face. He's oddly endearing, and that has made every ounce of embarrassment fly away from your body.

You push off the counter, walking towards him. "Jeonghan," you say softly, stopping just a few feet away. He immediately stops talking, his eyes finally settling on yours, wide and a little panicked.

"It's alright," you continue, and even to your own ears, your voice sounds softer than usual. "I'll go." You pause, and Jeonghan cannot believe his heart flutters watching your smile widen. "I think I need a vacation. It's been a while."

A flash of surprise, then something akin to relief, crosses his face. His shoulders seem to relax, and he lets out a quiet breath. "Are you… sure?" he asks, his voice returning to its normal, calm tone.

"Sure," you confirm, meeting his gaze steadily. The fool in your heart is already packing her bags.

You stand beside Jeonghan in front of the lavish resort, feeling a flutter of nerves that has nothing to do with the gentle breeze rustling your hair. Your phone buzzes incessantly in your hand.

Eunhie 😻: Omg you're there! Send pics! Is he hot in resort wear?!

Eunhie 😻: Remember the rules of fake marriage! Fake kiss often! Look smitten!

Eunhie 😻: No actually, scratch that. Don't kiss him unless it's an emergency. But LOOK like you want to.

You shove your phone into your small clutch, suppressing a groan. Rules of fake marriage. This is going to be an ordeal.

Jeonghan turns to you, not looking his best, composed self, and that gives you a little bit of reassurance. "Alright, a few ground rules," he says, his voice low. "My family is… traditional. They're big on appearances."

You almost sigh.

"First," he continues, "my mother will likely want to discuss the wedding. We're keeping it vague. ‘It just happened.’ ‘We didn’t invite anyone.’ Don't give any specifics, because there aren't any." He pauses, and you nod before noticing the faint red on his ears. "She also might mention 'grandchildren.' Just… smile and nod. Or change the subject to the weather. I don’t know."

Technically, you’d be as red as a tomato in such a situation, but something about seeing Jeonghan flustered boosts your confidence. You bite back a laugh, nodding firmly again.

"Second," he adds, stepping a little closer without warning. Any confidence you’d felt a second ago evaporates into thin air and you’re suddenly blushing. "Public displays of affection are expected. Nothing overboard, but they'll be looking for signs that we're… a proper couple. Holding hands, a little arm-linking, maybe leaning in during conversations." He glances at your hand, then back up at your eyes. "I'll try to initiate, but feel free to reciprocate or even start it if you think it's needed."

Your heart thumps against your ribs as you swallow a hard lump in your throat. Initiate? This is a lot more hands-on than you anticipated.

"And third," he finishes, his gaze softening slightly. "Just… try to look comfortable with me. Like we've known each other forever, which, technically, we have." He offers a small, reassuring smile, and you feel like you’re floating in the air. "It'll be fine. Just a few days."

He extends his hand, his fingers beckoning. "Ready?"

You take a deep breath, the lingering scent of cedar and laundry from his cologne comforting your senses. You look in his eyes—his chocolate brown orbs that haven’t changed a bit since school—and smile nervously before keeping your hand in his. A wave of adrenaline washes over you as his fingers instantly lock around yours, somehow snatching your breath away and grounding you at the same time.

You and Jeonghan step inside the grand lobby, his hand still gently clasping yours. A woman with a sharp, elegant bob and a bright smile rushes towards you. It’s Jeonghan’s aunt, and she embraces him warmly before turning her beaming attention to you.

"Jeonghan! And this must be Y/N! It's so lovely to finally meet you, dear!" she exclaims, pulling you into a surprisingly tight hug. Her eyes sparkle as she subtly takes in your dress, then Jeonghan’s hand still holding yours. "My sister has told me so much about the sudden, wonderful news!"

You manage a polite smile, feeling Jeonghan’s thumb subtly rub the back of your hand. You know he’s trying to reassure you but all it makes you is a nervous wreck. "It's lovely to meet you too, ma'am," you reply, trying to sound genuinely thrilled.

Then begins a crazy spree of introductions that keep you on the edge. The only reason you find yourself easily engaging in light conversation, answering questions about your bakery, is because Jeonghan makes it all easy. He stays close, occasionally squeezing your hand or resting his chin lightly on your head when a particularly effusive relative demands a photo. You feel the warmth of his hand on your back, and his side pressed against yours. He continues to talk about your relationship to whoever asks, and his proximity makes a small, selfish part of you wish it were real.

At lunch, or when the family gathers for drinks, you feel yourself sweat with the scrutinizing eyes on you but every time Jeonghan smiles at you, it melts away. No matter how uncertain this whole thing makes you, you know you’ve chosen it. You feel pathetically happy getting his attention like this, and at the end of the day, you will only be blaming yourself.

One more ease for you on this trip is Seri, even though she’s annoying with her remarks.

"See how he looks at you? That's true love, Y/N. You owe me a big time for this setup!"

"Don't forget to accidentally fall into his arms later. For maximum impact, you know."

“Did he mention kissing? Are you going to kiss him at any point?”

You manage to shove her and laugh it off most times, but it makes your heart race anyway. You’re not sure if Jeonghan even remembers the little drunk kiss, or what he concluded from it. Perhaps he took it as a mistake, which is why he hasn’t even brought it up. You don’t know. What you know is that you wish it could happen again, for real this time.

When the night finally winds down, Jeonghan's mother gives you a warm, if still slightly scrutinizing, hug, telling you what a lovely addition you are to the family. Seri pulls you aside, whispering, "Nailed it! Now go get your beauty sleep, Mrs. Yoon!" before she disappears with the rest of the family.

You and Jeonghan walk back to your shared room in comfortable silence. The long day of pretending has left you both weary. You open the door with the key card and step inside, the sudden silence feeling somewhat comforting.

You glance at the single large bed, then at the couch. Jeonghan also glances at the couch, then back at the bed, then at you. An awkward silence fills the room. You realize you haven’t ever been alone like this with Jeonghan before. It’s a thought that drives you insane for a second longer than you’d like.

"I'll take the couch," Jeonghan says in a quiet voice. He walks over, dropping his small duffel bag beside it, and starts to pull a throw blanket from a nearby armchair.

"Are you sure?" you ask, your head tilted in what you think is guilt. He turns with a small, tired smile on his face that tugs at your heart. "It's fine. I've slept on worse." He shrugs. "You should get some proper rest. It wouldn’t be nice if I just slept beside you, you know."

You feel your face flush, and to avoid his eyes, you quickly walk towards the dresser to pull out some pajamas. You change quickly in the bathroom, shedding a few tears of overwhelm and when you emerge, Jeonghan is already stretched out on the couch, eyes closed, a light blanket pulled up to his chin.

"Goodnight, Y/N," he murmurs, his voice already heavy with sleep.

"Goodnight, Jeonghan," you reply, climbing into the bed and wondering if you’ll even be able to sleep. You close your eyes, the day's events swirling in your head. The feel of his arm around you, the subtle touch of his hand, his genuine smile whenever he looked at you. You're tired, so incredibly tired, but a soft, unfamiliar warmth settles in your chest. Despite the pretense, despite the chaos, despite the fear of what might happen, you drift off, lulled by his soft breathing from the couch.

Everybody who’s ever known Jeonghan is aware of the fact that he’s not a jealous person. Half the time, he doesn’t even acknowledge the existence of people around him, because though he feels, he’s never particularly been amazed by someone so much that he wants them solely for himself.

So it doesn’t make sense that he’s currently shooting daggers at the guy sitting next to you and helping you make bracelets—Joshua, his cousin. From where he’s sitting, he can micro-gaze into the way his fingers brush against yours every time he helps you weave a bead into a strand. And cherry on top, your giggles that flow so easily beside him. Something about the sight makes him want to be the reason for all your smiles. He wonders why he’s only ever seen you glitching around him. Is his presence uncomfortable?

“You look like you’re gonna kill him,” Seri thumps beside you on the bench, her usual grin making Jeonghan roll his eyes. “That’s because I am.”

“Woah,” she widens her eyes at him, genuinely surprised for a second before she bursts into a laugh. Jeonghan’s expression doesn’t falter. “Do you realize that this, in its plain textbook definition, is known as jealousy?”

Jeonghan freezes, a breath getting stuck in his throat.

“I can’t believe this is finally happening. Are you jealous Hannie? Look at me, come on!”

Jeonghan avoids looking up from the ground as the realization hits him like a truck. He remembers your hand in his from yesterday, and he cannot believe that he feels his heart rate quickening. And then, the kiss that he'd tried to dismiss as a drunken impulse tumbles down his memory box, making him cough out a breath.

He watches you giggle and make a bracelet that’ll never be on his wrist, connecting these dots he never wanted to acknowledge. This can't be happening. Not now. Not with you.

But it has.

The night air is cool and soft against your skin as you sit by the resort pool, your feet dangling in the refreshingly cold water. You stare up at the starry sky, your thoughts wandering to the one person in your life who’s kept you up many nights.

All day, Jeonghan has been subtly absent. After breakfast, he seemed to keep a distance from you, engaging with other family members, and leaving you on your own. You haven't questioned it, but an uneasy knot has formed in your stomach.

As if on cue, you feel his presence beside you. Jeonghan slides onto the edge of the pool deck, his legs joining yours in the water. The contact is immediate, a rush of cool water around your ankles and the warmth of his body next to you.

"Hey," he says, his voice soft. He dips into the pool with his hand, disturbing the glowing surface. "How was your day?"

You shrug, letting a small sigh escape your lips. "It was... busy. A lot of questions about my work and our relationship."

He hums, his gaze fixed on the water. You glance at him, trying to subside the relentless throbbing of your heart "How about you? You seemed to lay low today." You manage to giggle.

He sighs, and you swear you see his ears turn red in the dim light. He briefly glances at you before looking down at the water. "I wasn't feeling so well. Just a bit under the weather."

Your brow furrows instantly. "Oh? Are you okay? You should have said something.”

Jeonghan cranes his neck to look at you while you continue to stare at him in concern. “Do you need anything? Medicine? Come on, we should get inside." You start to push yourself up, your concern for him overriding everything else.

"No, no, I'm fine now," he reassures you, gently placing a hand on your arm to keep you seated. It's pathetic how that seems to still you. His eyes, however, subtly shift. You follow his gaze, just barely catching sight of Joshua walking past the pool bar, his eyes seemingly scanning the area.

Jeonghan turns back to you, his expression suddenly unreadable, and you see a hint of something intense in his eyes. His voice drops to a near whisper, barely audible over the distant music. "What I'm going to ask of you now may be very inappropriate," he says, his gaze meeting yours before flickering down to your lips for a second, "but... will you kiss me?" He doesn't wait for your reaction, adding quickly, "Someone's watching. We need to look convincing."

Your mind which was hyperactive due to his proximity, screeches to a sudden halt. You forget to breathe as your brain becomes a blur of desperate logic and raw desire. Your heart, the foolish, idiotic thing it is, screams yes. Every rational thought you possess flies out the window as you make a singular choice.

Without a second thought, you lean in, closing the small distance between you. Your lips meet his, soft and hesitant at first, then with a sudden, real urgency that knocks the breath out of your lungs.

This time, there’s no alcohol-induced haze, no falling asleep. You're wide awake, acutely aware of the warmth of his mouth, the gentle pressure of his hand on your arm that moves to cradle your neck, and the intoxicating truth of a kiss you've wanted for what feels like a lifetime.

Your lips part slowly, and you feel breathless, your heart hammering against your ribs. He pulls back slightly against your better will, his eyes searching yours.

"Is he… is he still watching?" you whisper, your voice a little shaky.

Jeonghan's gaze moves past your shoulder, then back to you. There's no sign of Joshua anywhere, he feels drunk on the taste of you. He doesn't know what takes over him, but he cannot let go of you just yet. "Yes," he murmurs, brushing a hair strand away from your face.

His eyes ask a silent question, a question you answer with your gaze dropping to his lips. He leans in again, slowly this time, giving you every opportunity to pull away.

But you don't. Your eyes drift shut as his lips find yours once more, softer, deeper, more deliberate than before. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, his thumb gently stroking your skin, awakening something strange inside you.

When he finally pulls away, you are both breathless, the silence of the night sounding loud around you. His eyes are still focused solely on you, and you are sure he can hear your heartbeat.

"He's gone," Jeonghan says in a voice raspy that sends shivers down your spine.

There it is. The flimsy excuse for the kiss. There's suddenly a heavy awkwardness in the air as you feel heat rush to your cheeks, the reality of what just happened suffocating you. Your heart still pounds, but now it's from pure, unadulterated panic.

You push yourself up from the edge of the pool, scrambling to your feet. "Right," you blurt out, avoiding his gaze. "I... I think I'm going to head to bed. It's late."

You don't wait for a response, practically bolting away from the pool, leaving him sitting there alone. You hear some distant sounds fading behind you as you rush back to the room.

Jeonghan sits by the pool, watching you scurry away like you'd been electrocuted. He touches his lips for a fraction, the reality of what he's done dawning on him. The cool night air does nothing to quell the bewildered heat in his chest.

Involuntarily, he curses under his breath. What the fuck?

The journey back from the resort is strangely filled with a thick silence that threatens to cut your heart open. You and Jeonghan are in his car, the landscape blurring past the window. No one else is there to observe, hence no need for any pretense and the mere thought of all that has ended kills you from the inside. The air between you is thick with unspoken words, specifically the memory of the kiss by the pool. You wish for him to say something, to acknowledge this delicate thing that has begun to linger between you two. You don’t know what it might mean, or rather, what it likely doesn't mean for him.

The moment the car pulls up to your apartment building, you're out without letting him speak a word. You burst through your door, throwing your bag onto the floor, and without a second thought, stumble towards Eunha's apartment across the hall. You bang on her door, tears already pricking your eyes.

Eunha opens it, still in her pajamas, blinking sleepily. Her eyes widen as she takes in your disheveled state. "Y/N? What's wrong? What happened?"

The dam that you’d been holding dearly onto, breaks. You fall into her arms, sobbing uncontrollably, the exhaustion and emotional overload of the past few days crashing down on you. Your heart feels like it was made of glass, and Jeonghan is a toddler clutching onto it. You’re afraid he’ll drop it anytime, and it’ll shatter into a million pieces that you won’t be able to pick up ever again.

"I love him, Eunha,” you sob, your eyes shut as you shake violently in her hold like a baby. “I love him so much. I love him. Do you hear me?”

“I love him.” You babble incoherently, unable to hear anything that Eunha says to comfort you. You’re tired, exhausted, and your words are equally drained. “I love him so much. And he doesn’t.”

For days, you haven’t seen Jeonghan. Your emotions are heavy enough to deal with, you don’t want to look at him and make it worse. You’ve been throwing yourself into work, trying to bury the ache in your chest, trying to forget the feel of his lips, the weight of his existence.

You’re meticulously wiping down the espresso machine, lost in thought, when the little bell above your door jingles. You look up, and your heart screams at you to fall to your knees and hide behind the counter. But your eyes meet Jeonghan’s rather quickly. He stands there, looking a little out of place, clutching a small, familiar silver chain in his hand.

He waves at you with a small smile that rips your heart apart. You gesture for him to wait, mouthing, “I’m coming.” You prepare yourself while serving the in-line customers and then you tell Seokmin you’ll be outside for a second.

You step outside the busy bakery with Jeonghan, and it’s suddenly very awkwardly silent. You don’t speak first, just stare at him questioningly. He bites his lip, then chuckles awkwardly before dangling your bracelet in front of you. "You left this in my car. I thought... I should return it."

You gulp, staring at the useless silver chain that somehow looks prettier in his hands. Darn him and darn this bracelet.

You take it from him, your fingers brushing briefly—a contact that sends a jolt through you, reminding you of all the touches that had felt so real, so intimate, just days ago. "Thanks," you reply, trying to keep your voice neutral. Professional event.

He shoves his hands into his pockets, his gaze darting around the street and avoiding your eyes. "Right. And... about everything. The apartment, my mom, the resort. I am sorry, Y/N. I know it's been a lot. I didn't mean to drag you into so much trouble." He rubs the back of his neck, a nervous habit you've only just noticed. "It's just… You know. I should have handled it better. You shouldn't have had to deal with all that." He trails off, looking genuinely flustered, like he wants to say so much more but the words are stuck.

His words only make the ache in your chest sharpen. You grip the bracelet tightly, the cool metal pressing into your palm. You can't do this anymore. Every single thing about this is tearing you apart.

You take a deep breath, forcing yourself to meet his gaze, even though it feels like looking directly into the sun. "Jeonghan," you say, your voice soft but firm, "I appreciate you saying that. And I genuinely don't regret helping you with the apartment. Or with your mom." You pause, choosing your words carefully. "But... I can't do this anymore.”

There. You’ve said it. You can’t undo it. You feel liberated, but also devastated.

“Y/N—” he begins to say, but you know you cannot hear it. You interrupt, your eyes glistening ever so slightly, “I can't be part of any more plans. No more pretending. I'm sorry, but I just... I can't."

Jeonghan freezes. His slight, nervous fidgeting stops. His eyes, which had been filled with apology, now widened almost unnoticeably, a sudden, raw vulnerability flashing through them. He stares at you, seeming like he’s been hit with a hard blow. He doesn't say anything, but the silence from him is deafening, filled with a surprise that borders on hurt.

You smile at him, one that pains you. “Thank you for—” giving me a chance to feel what it’s like to be close to you, you want to say, but you bite your tongue, the corners of your lips trembling. “For everything.”

And you mean it. You are grateful for every emotion he’s ever made you feel, even the hurt. There’s no ounce of resentment in your heart for him as you walk back inside, wiping a tear from the corner of your eye.

Jeonghan thinks he knows what a stab feels like.

Jeonghan stares at the box, a cardboard tomb of forgotten memories. Seri, inexplicably, has decided his apartment needs a "post-housewarming deep clean," which mostly involves her directing him while he moves heavy things. He's wrestling with a particularly stubborn stack of old school books when she lets out a gasp from a nearby box.

"Aha!" she exclaims, pulling out a dusty photo album. "Jackpot! You still have this?!" She plops down onto the floor, scattering a few stray dust bunnies. "Come here, Hannie, let's relive the glory days of middle school!"

Jeonghan sighs, but curiosity, or perhaps just resignation, draws him over. He sits beside her, bracing himself for the attack of embarrassing adolescent pictures. Seri flips through the pages, giggling, pointing out various awkward phases, all in which Jeonghan looks like a heartthrob.

"Oh my god, look at my braces!" she cackles, then her finger stills on a page. "Wait. Look at this one."

It's a picture from a school picnic, a blurry group shot.. You're in the foreground, laughing at something off-camera, your head thrown back. And behind you, slightly out of focus, is Jeonghan, his gaze fixed on you, his young face twisted in a soft smile.

Seri pokes him. "See that? And this one!" She flips to another page—a school play where all the girls are wearing dresses. You're beaming at the camera, and in the background, half-hidden by a prop tree, is Jeonghan, again, looking at you. Another picture from a field trip, a candid shot of you talking with friends, and there he is, in the periphery, with his eyes trained on you.

"Seriously," Seri says, her voice now replaced by genuine fascination. "You're looking at Y/N in every single one of these. It's almost creepy how consistent it is." She looks up at him with a knowing glint in her eyes. "You've always looked at her like that, you know. Like she's the only person in the room."

"No," Jeonghan says in a rough voice, pulling his gaze away from the album. He pushes himself up, pacing a few steps away. "That's ridiculous, Seri. I... I respect her a lot. We've known each other forever. She's a great friend. I don't... I don't 'like her like that.' It's just..." He turns back to her, his voice firm, trying to convince himself as much as her. "I don't like her like that.” He starts to walk away, making for the door, as if to escape the conversation.

But Seri's years of patience snap. She sighs frustratedly. "Stop being an idiot, Hannie! How much more obvious do you need it to be?!"

"You're so dense it's infuriating! I practically gift-wrapped a scenario for you, setting you up with the apartment, the resort trip, making you play house, and you still can't see it?!" Her voice rises an octave, but what makes Jeonghan flinch is her words. "You even got a letter from her! How could you just ignore it? How could you not remember it after seeing her again now? How can you not see even your feelings?"

Seri keeps on rambling, but Jeonghan freezes, his entire body going rigid. The color drains from his face. His eyes, wide with sudden, desperate confusion, fix on Seri as he walks closer to her, his throat lodged with a painful lump.

"What letter?" he asks, the words catching in his throat. Seri’s constant babbling stops, and she looks up at him blankly, trying to take in his two-word question. "What letter, Seri?!"

“She mailed you a letter.”

“I never got a letter!”

Oh, hell no.

The apartment is suffocatingly silent after Seri left, having left Jeonghan standing amidst the half-unpacked boxes, the photo album lying open on the floor. He doesn't even remember closing the door behind her.

He walks slowly, numbly, to the photo album. His eyes find the picture Seri pointed out—you, laughing, radiant, and oblivious to the young, watchful boy in the background watching you like you're his whole world. And then another picture, and another. It's undeniable. He sees it now, a pattern woven through years he never bothered to truly examine.

His head spins, tumbling through a lifetime of moments. The way he always found himself drawn to your corner of the classroom. The strange comfort of your voice, even when you were just talking about homework. The quiet pride he felt when you excelled, the vague unease when you talked about other boys. The way he’d unconsciously seek you out in crowded hallways, just to make sure you were there.

Then the gaping void of the seven years you were gone. He hadn't even given a name to whatever it was that he felt whenever he thought of you in that time, but now that he thinks, he often thinks of you. It was a constant, low-grade ache, a missing piece he hadn’t known how to name.

And now. His illogical anger at Joshua. The way he’d craved your attention, your laughter, your very presence. The way your head felt against his cheek after the first kiss, and the need to kiss you again at the pool, an excuse already forming on his tongue before he even asked.

His heart clenches with a sickening mix of regret and realization. He’d been so stupid. So incredibly, utterly blind. He loved you. He always had—a love that had been there all along, hiding in plain sight, waiting for him to finally wake up. And he had wasted years.

Now, you've drawn a line. You’re done with his plans, done with the pretense. His chest aches with his emotions, and all he wishes is to run to you, but he feels motionless.

Have his years of stupidity, his inability to see what was right in front of him, finally cost him the very person he never realized he couldn't live without?

After a whole day of overthinking and trying to reach out to you, Jeonghan has traveled to his hometown, a place he hadn't thought about in years, driven by a raw, consuming urgency he barely recognizes as his own.

Jeonghan stands in front of his old house building, a faded brick structure that looks exactly as he remembers it. At the door stands Mr. Choi, the landlord whom his father was annoyed with back in the day. The older man has more wrinkles around his eyes, and he looks like he wants to throw a brick at Jeonghan for waking him up with his incessant knocking.

He surprisingly recognizes Jeonghan though, claiming his father still visits often and has shown pictures of his kids.

Jeonghan takes a deep breath, trying to keep his voice steady. "Mr. Choi, I know it's a long shot, but I'm looking for a letter. It would have been sent around seven years ago, to this address, after I moved out." He tries to sound calm, but his voice wavers slightly. "It's very important. Did you... Did you ever get any misdirected mail for me? Anything you held onto?"

Mr. Choi snorts, adjusting his glasses. "Seven years? Are you daft, boy? Mail forwarding lasts a year, maybe two if you're lucky. I don't keep old junk like that. People move on. You should too." He makes a dismissive gesture.

"Please, Mr. Choi," Jeonghan presses, an uncharacteristic desperation creeping into his tone. He steps closer, trying to convey the gravity of the situation. "This isn't just... some old thing. It's really, truly important. If there's any chance, any clue at all. If you remember anything, please. It would mean everything to me." His voice is almost pleading, etched with a raw vulnerability that would surprise anyone who knew his usual reserved nature.

Mr. Choi sighs frantically, then turns and shuffles into the dimly lit storage room behind the reception desk. Jeonghan's heart soars with a fragile hope.

A moment later, the old man reappears, dragging a dusty, battered cardboard box. He unceremoniously dumps it onto the worn linoleum floor in front of Jeonghan. "AI might have kept some of the truly misplaced stuff from a decade ago. Don't know why. It's a jumble. Take a look. You'll be lucky if you find anything." He grumbles, then shuffles back to his desk, pointedly ignoring Jeonghan.

Jeonghan's hands tremble slightly as he sinks to the floor beside the box. Dust motes dance in the sliver of sunlight filtering through the window. He starts sifting through the contents – old utility bills for long-gone tenants, faded advertisements, forgotten flyers, and indeed, a few yellowed envelopes addressed to names he doesn't recognize. He digs with a racing heart, hope battling against despair. His fingers cramp, his eyes strain, but he pushes on, driven by the profound need for answers, for understanding, for you.

Just as he's about to give up, his fingers brush against something soft, slightly crumpled, at the very bottom. He pulls it out. It's a pink envelope with cute little hearts drawn on it. The paper is yellowed at the edges, the corners soft with age, but the handwriting... your handwriting and his name, carefully penned, is still there.

Jeonghan feels like he's stopped breathing. He runs a thumb over the envelope, his chest tightening. With trembling fingers, he tears open the seal. The paper inside is thin, folded simply. He unfolds it, his eyes scanning the words, your words, pouring out from seven years ago.

"Hello, Jeonghan. I hope you're having a good time and everything's well. It took me a lot of courage to write this, read it all over again, and finally have it sent to you. This is nothing serious or something grand, but I want to say thank you for taking your time to read this. You might toss it away in the trash can after, but I hope you don't belittle whatever I'm about to write.

I like you. I have been liking you since last year. It's very childish to be saying this to someone I've never interacted with (I wish we did) and I'm surprised that I'm finally saying this to you. Even if it's just through a piece of paper, it's still genuine and harmless. You'll probably laugh or roll your eyes at the way I'm writing this, but I seriously hope for nothing in return.

This is taking everything in me to say this, but thank you for making me hate Sundays or weekends and love Mondays or days when I could see you. I think you might remember the numerous times we had eye contact or you might have caught me stealing glances at you now and then.

I'm not sure about this, but my friends told you about a girl in their class having a crush on you (and it was none other than me)

I am writing this with no hopes but I do expect an answer for my clarity of mind. Thank you.”

- Y/N

He sees your young heart laid bare, waiting and hoping from all those years ago. The sincerity of it hits him like a harsh wave, making his heart clench in an unfamiliar ache.

If someone were to tell him that he'd ever cry over a letter, he'd not believe them. However, he feels hot and stinging tears blur the words on the page.

The sheer force of his emotions and the painful clarity of what he'd missed, overwhelms him. Yoon Jeonghan sits there on the dusty floor, utterly broken and utterly, finally, aware.

Jeonghan [💌]: Hi, Y/N. I know I suck, and I know you said you didn't want to be a part of my plans anymore. I respect that, but I wish you could hang out with me just once. I have something to say to you. You can say no, it's up to you. But it'd be nice if you could hear me out. Have a nice day.

Your fingers hover over the keyboard. A part of you, the part that's been broken and hurting, wants to just say no, to cut ties cleanly. But the foolish part, the part that still aches for him, can't resist. You type a single word: Alright.

And then the next day, you stand outside your apartment building, your heart pounds with a mix of dread and a dangerous hope.

Jeonghan's car pulls up a second later, and he steps out, looking different. Your breath hitches at the way his hair is styled to expose his forehead, and his outfit comprises a sleek black turtleneck, paired with a jacket. It's not even a lot chilly, but you remember he gets cold easily, so you swallow thickly and let him open the passenger door for you.

He's not a mess of nerves like you'd seen him lately. He's rather relaxed and composed like the Jeonghan who first walked into your bakery a few months ago.

You slide in, his usual scent filling the space. He walks around and gets in, starting the car without another word. You keep your gaze fixed on the blurring city lights, battling the urge to look at him, to acknowledge anything that's flowing between you. “Where are we going?”

“It's a surprise.” He says, with a brief smile directed towards you. Something about him feels entirely new today, but you can't pinpoint what exactly. So you try to think of other things, a silly joke Seokmin told you the other day, or the time Eunha fell in front of the elevator.

Jeoneghan turns on the music to kill the silence, and you don't realize when you fall asleep.

You wake to a soft voice calling your name. "Y/N. We're here."

You blink, disoriented, as you realize the car isn't moving. You push yourself upright, stretching the stiffness from your neck. The car door opens, and the cool night air rushes in. You step out, your eyes scanning the surroundings, and you instantly freeze.

You're back.

The familiar street, lined with old, leafy trees. The worn pavement beneath your feet. The cozy, old-fashioned houses that haven't changed in years. Your hometown. The place where you grew up, where you and Jeonghan went to school together.

He closes the car door softly. "I'm... I'm sorry to bring you out here," he says, his voice a little strained. He reaches out, his fingers finding yours, interlacing them gently. “And I'm sorry for this too,” he gently presses your hand, “But I want to take you somewhere.”

He stares at you for a second longer in case you want to pull away from him, but you don't. You’re confused, but some hints are tickling your brain about what might come.

Once he's sure you're not pulling away from him, he starts walking, slowly, pulling you along a familiar path.

A minute later, he stops. You look up to see the gate of your old middle school. The very place where your story began, where your childish crush on him had first blossomed.

You have a feeling where this is going. A terrifying, beautiful, impossible hope bubbles up in your chest, but you quickly suppress it. You can't. Not after all this time. You won't hope. You won't ask. You'll just wait for him to speak.

He turns to face you, his hand still holding yours. His eyes, usually so guarded, are open, vulnerable, filled with a raw emotion that makes your heart ache. He takes a deep breath and smiles briefly at you.

"Y/N," he begins, his hand slipping into the pocket of his jacket and taking out an old, yellow envelope. He extends it towards you with a nervous smile. “Can you give this to me?”

Your heart stops beating.

You could recognise this darn envelope anywhere.

Your hand shakes, and your eyes shift between the old paper and Jeonghan's still-smiling face. Your mouth is dry when he softly hands you the envelope, closing your hand around it.

No. This isn't what you've been thinking. Is he about to mock you? Is he about to laugh at your face?

“Give it to me, Y/N. Like you wanted to all those years ago.” He says, and his voice is so gentle that you feel your nerves calming automatically. You mouth a no, shaking your head and trying to utter a few more words but you fail.

Jeonghan takes a step closer to you, holding your face in his hands and softly leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. You feel all your senses numbing as you stare up at him wide-eyed while he still smiles at you. “I'm willing to receive your letter, angel. Will you please bestow me the honor of having it?”

It's safe to say that you've never been more speechless than this in your whole life. Not even when you ranked first in high school and not even when you first opened your bakery. No emotion compares to the feeling you're experiencing right now, staring at the man you've loved for years, telling you to tell him you love him.

Your hand moves on its own, timidly extending the yellowed envelope towards him. His smile widens, kick-starting your heart with a force as he takes it from you.

Your empty hand is soon filled with another envelope, relatively newer and crisper. It says, To Y/N in Jeonghan's handwriting. You stare up at him, blinking. He cocks his head forward, eyeing the letter in your hand. “Read it.”

“You…you haven't read mine?” You ask, your voice not more than a whisper. Jeonghan sighs. “You mailed it to the wrong address. It was a task finding it after so many years. I've read it, and I know your heart from seven years ago.”

It's still my heart, you want to say, but you don't. You're red and hot as you wet your lips, sucking in a deep breath. “Read my heart, angel.” He says, and you shut your eyes tight. “Don't call me that.”

“Why?”

You don't want to say that it makes your heart race, so you just shift a little, pulling out the letter from the envelope.

“Hi, Y/N.

I'm very late in answering you, but if I had received your letter, I would've run to you. Or maybe not, because I've been a blind coward all my life.

Not anymore, though. Because I've come to terms with a few facts.

Number 1: I love you.

Number 2: You're very special to me.

And number 3: I cannot pretend that there's nothing between us.

I know this may be sudden, and unbelievable, but I want you to trust me on this. You can take your time to think if you need but know that I'm always going to be here. There's no other place for me in this world. I belong to you, and I'm always gonna come back to you one way or another.

I promise I'll never hurt you, and I'll try to be the best boyfriend you could've ever asked for. After all the pain you've had to go through, you probably hate me, and to be fair, I don't even deserve someone as amazing as you. But I'd be grateful if you gave me a chance.

I've loved you for as long as I've known you. I'm sorry I was blind about it.

— Yours, Jeonghan.”

You gasp in a few breaths, folding the paper with trembling hands. This cannot be real. Your heart pounds wildly against your chest, and when you finally stare up at him with glistening eyes, you see a lone tear escape Jeonghan's eye that he quickly wipes.

“Will you give me a chance, Y/N?”

Hell, you'd be a fool not to.

You don't even try. Your head nods once, like your body and soul already belong to him. There's so much you're feeling at the moment, but the only emotion that overrides everything is love.

You feel so much love for the man in front of you that you don't even realize when you tiptoe and wrap your arms around his neck. Your lips find his with ease, and his arms pull you closer by your waist, as if he's also been starving for this.

For you.

“I love you so much,” you whisper against his lips, letting your tears fall down your cheeks. You've kept these words in for so long that now all you want is to keep saying them. “I love you, Jeonghan.”

He pulls away from you, softly wiping your tears away. There's a blinding smile on his face that makes you smile too, in disbelief, in love, in ecstasy.

“I love you too, Y/N.” He says, making your heart stop and restart. You push yourself off of him, shutting your eyes and breathing in deeply. “Wow.”

“Wow. Is this…is this happening? Is this real?”

Jeonghan chuckles, grabbing your wrist and pulling you closer to him. “Don't go away from me, angel” he whispers, tucking a hair strand behind your ear.

Yeah, you're not sure if you can go on with this new relationship without going insane.

“Don't make my heart race,” you whisper back, making him chuckle again. His lips are on yours again, and you've finally found the meaning of euphoria.

Jeonghan loves you back, and that's all the happiness you need in this life.

taglist: @hannah81141418 @zealouscookierebeltrash @tokitosun @woncheecks @http-seishu @lily409 @fragmentof-indifference @giverosespls @haotelmania @viciousdarlings @nowtheluckyone @armycarat2612

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2cool4ghoul · 7 months ago

Text

I'm on Fire

Long time no see, eh?

sorry for my prolonged period of absence, I got shit going on!!!!

This is my first time writing for Joel Miller, I hope everyone enjoys, maybe it could be a two parter if people r feeling it! I haven't edited this because honestly who has time for that?

Summary: Reader asks for help with being taught hunting, gets stuck with Joel, who she thinks hates her, but we all know how that ends? Reader grew up in a cult situation where girls r taught they need to repopulate the earth after the outbreak and thinks sex is just for baby making, Joel wants to show her it could be more. I been listening to I'm on fire by bruce Springsteen and that song inspired this.

Warning: under 18 DNI! age gap not specified but allusion to it being gargantuan and ludicrously capacious, Smut, unprotected p in v (do I need to say it? WRAP IT), fingering, oral f receiving, slight daddy kink, doing it from behind, Joel is kinda mean, perv Joel, allusions to masturbation, innocence kink, religious imagery?, mentions of pregnancy, kinda public I guess, post outbreak, can be game Joel or Pedro Joel, any Joels a goal, no use of y/n, reader is female gendered, pussy pronouns, size kink if you squint, Praise kink, yearning, Joel feeling guilty and sorry for himself , boohoo, if I miss anything please tell me!!!! I love feedback!!

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You had been walking for hours.What was meant to be a simple hunt had now turned into aimlessly walking through the forest, staring at Joels back as he stalked in front of you. He refused to admit that he had gotten the two of you lost in the midst of chasing a rabbit, or a deer, or whatever it was he says he saw. When you did suggest heading a different direction, you were met with a sharp rejection, or a grunt telling you to keep your mouth shut. You knew he was angry before you’d even left, saddled with the burden of dragging you along with him.

You didn’t particularly know Joel and you didn’t particularly like him either. His stand-offish demeanour and deep glare whenever you were around made you feel small in his presence. You had given up on the smiling and politeness that you gave everyone else in an attempt at self preservation, yet deep down you so badly wanted him to like you. You weren’t sure what you did and at what point you did it, but Joel made it very evident that he’d much rather be torn to shreds by infected, than teach you the basics of hunting. Which, with the sun becoming low and darkness threatening to spill over into the sky, you thought maybe he didn’t know the basics of hunting either.

Frustrated, you huffed whilst adjusting your backpack on your shoulders, rolling your eyes slightly as he stopped to try and grasp any familiarities in your surroundings. “What’s got you all huffy and puffy?” He quipped, not even bothering to look over his shoulder at you.

“I am tired, Joel, we’ve been walking for hours now, I want to go home.” Sighing, your head fell back on your shoulders and he carried on walking.

“If I remember correctly, this was your bright idea, was it not?” His fists clenched at his side and you furrowed your brows.

“It was, when I thought I’d actually be able to learn something, I thought you were meant to be good at this-“

“I am good at this, you’re scaring ‘em all away, with your bitchin’ and moanin’” You’d obviously bruised his ego a bit there, yet the reaction you’d gotten was the most exciting thing that had happened all day.

Well, that and being able to watch him closely whilst he furrowed his brow, focusing down the barrel of a gun. Laying on the ground next to him, so close that you could nearly smell the musk that seemed to radiate off of him. Yes, you didn’t particularly like him, but looking at him? You liked that very much. You liked the way his arms looked when he rolled up the sleeves of his flannels. The way he looked when he started the day, fresh out the shower with his greying hair slicked back and slightly damp. The way his voice was low when he was trying to teach you a lesson. The way he crossed his arms and rolled his eyes when you made a joke, a suggestion, or even just breathed. Seeing all of this things was enough to put a pit in your stomach, a pit that you’d been carrying around all day with little idea what to do about it. It ached and it throbbed.

“Well maybe in your old age, your losing your touch.” You said it quiet, thinking that he wouldn’t hear you. But he did. He responded with a scoff, clenching his fists again. He wasn’t even going to dignify it with a insult back, his reaction alone was enough to make you feel insufficient. You both retreated to the silence and you kept yourself to your thoughts on how you were going to deal with the ache between your thighs.

______________________________________________________________

Night had fallen and Joel had still not managed to find your way home. Instead you’d found an old shack, barely together but good enough shelter to sleep for the night. Joel figured it was tomorrow’s problem, that and he couldn’t be bothered to listen to your complaints about how tired you were.

The dim glow of the campfire lamp created a yellow cast over Joels features and you couldn’t help but stare as he sat opposite you, eating a sandwich you’d given him earlier in an attempt to lift his spirits. His features were rough and frown lines had been permanently etched into his skin. This life had worn him down, toughed him up like leather. Maybe that was why he was mean to you. Maybe he’d ran clean out of kindness. His large hands made whatever he was holding look small, they were calloused and scarred across his knuckles. You didn’t want to imagine what things those hands had done. But you did want to imagine what they could do. Running over your skin, fingertips grazing your lips, leaving goosebumps and a shiver down your spine. Grabbing at your skin, creating bruises and marks, his fingers, thick and strong, spreading you open and filling you-

“The fuck are you lookin’ at?” Gruff and fed up, Joels voice snapped you right out of the darkest corners of your mind, your eyes widening slightly as you realised you had obviously been staring, eyes hazed over.

“I, uh, I was looking at my sandwich, I don’t think you deserve it.” Nice save, you praised your self internally and he raised an eyebrow, looking at you like you were some stupid insignificant thing.

“How come I don’t deserve it?”

“We caught nothing today, you didn’t teach me shit.” You tried your best to mimic the facial expression he was pulling, hoping that just maybe you could make him feel how he did.

“Hmm.” He grumbled after putting the last bite in his mouth. “’s'all gone now.” There was almost a smirk playing on his lips, his gaze making you squirm and squeeze your thighs together. What was happening to you? It felt like every fibre of your being was betraying you, begging for you to climb over to him and beg him to take you whatever way he wanted. “What’s the deal with you anyway?”

“With me?” Taken aback, you went slightly rigid, why would he want to know anything about you? He hated you, he made it perfectly clear. He nodded, eyes narrowing as if he was trying to work you out. “What do you mean?”

“Well, why do you want to learn to hunt? And don’t you have some boyfriend around to teach you?” This was the most he’d spoken to you all day, and he had you spluttering on the sip of whatever you’d just taken.

“I want to hunt so I can be useful,” you coughed out, shrugging your shoulders in an attempt to look casual, “and no I don’t have a boyfriend to teach me, so I suppose you’re just gonna have to put up with me for now.” Shaking your head, you tried at being playful, but it still didn’t crack his prying exterior.

“Pretty young thing like you, ‘bound to have ‘em falling at your feet.” It was said as almost a passing comment, but your shock was visible on your face, blinking and biting your lip trying to make up a response that was witting and defensive but you couldn’t.

Before you’d scrambled your way to Jackson, alone and bewildered, you had grown up in a cult, whose goal was primarily to restart civilisation. They’d taught how it worked, making babies and all that, and for a while you were happy playing the part, letting your father chose a man, who would be forced with the task of putting as many babies as he could inside you. You endured, what felt like a chore, with your partner, watching your friends fall pregnant. Your inability to fall pregnant was what made you run in the first place, hearing of what they did to the girls who could birth a child had frightened you, fearful that you’d be reduced to another mouth to feed. A drain on resources. So with all of that in mind, finding a boyfriend was never something that crossed your mind, nor was it something you greatly desired. But with Joel sat in front of you, legs spread with his thick thighs in your direction, you felt strings inside you being pulled that had previously been untouched.

“You think I’m pretty?” You swallowed, maintaining eye contact with him for a moment, trying to catch a hint of softness.

“I think you’d be doin’ better tryin’ to find a nice young man,” He adjusted his position and met your gaze, “rather than spendin’ the night in and old shack with’an old man like me.” This was him trying to be nice you thought, but it was having the opposite effect. It made you defensive and you narrowed your eyes.

“Oh because I’d be better off finding a man-”

“You’re puttin’ words in my mouth.” His interruption was calm, yet stern, shaking his head at you and rubbing his face with his hands. He’d succeeded in silencing you as you looked down at the ground in front of you, slightly embarrassed.

“I’ve had a boyfriend, or a lover, I don’t know what to call him,” You avoided him, you had no idea why you felt the need to be vulnerable, “and I don’t know what the whole big deal is, y’know?” You sighed, cheeks flushing a bit pink. “I don’t understand why someone would put themselves through that.”

“Through what?” He leaned forward slightly, curiosity shadowing his face in the dim light. Finally you lifted your head, showing him your red cheeks.

“That.” You hoped he understood your insinuation. And due to the sudden rigidness of his body recognised that he understood. He pursed his lips for a moment and then opened them as if to speak, yet nothing came out. Embarrassment was flooding your body, you regretted even bringing it up due to the sudden tension in the air. And there was that pit in your stomach again, aching and throbbing as you watched him stumble over words to say.

“Because it feels good.” Was all he could stifle out, watching your reaction carefully as your knitted your brows, screwing your face up in confusion slightly.

“Maybe for the men,” You scooted up onto your knees, looking up at him as he sat taller than you, “but for me, as a woman, its just so much pressure.” He was now looking confused, squinting his eyes, trying to understand.

“Pressure to what?”

“To make a baby.” He was beginning to patronise you, making you explain the obvious like it was some sick game. It got you all defensive again. “It doesn’t feel that great when all you can think about is if you’re going to be able to make-“

“It’s not just about that.” Adamantly he shook his head, eye scanning over your body watching as frustration overtook you. “It’s not just about making a baby.”

“Don’t treat me like I’m stupid, Miller, I’ve had sex, I know what its about.” You bit sharp, heart thumping in your chest, moving closer to him to try and assert some dominance.

“I don’t think you do.” You could’ve sworn there was a ghost of a smirk hiding behind his beard. “Christ, I should not be the one telling you this.”

“Telling me what? What Joel?” You were now practically between his legs, kneeling, begging to understand what he could possibly be talking about. “Please, tell me, I don’t understand.” His eye were trying frantically, to look everywhere except for you.

“Darlin’, I cant be tellin’ you this, s’wrong.” His voice was lower, speaking to you quietly and firmly, grabbing a hold of your wrists. You felt hot under his touch, his rough hand wrapping around your wrists, staring into your eyes. “M’old enough to be your daddy.”

“Whats that got to do with it?” Your voice lowered to the same volume as his, you were searching for the answers in his eyes, and he looked conflicted. Like he was balancing options.

Your body was betraying you again, it wanted to reach forward, wrap itself around him, be as close to him as possible, as if the proximity now was not enough. As if the feeling of his fingers and palms on your now hot skin, was not enough.

“You think I haven’t noticed the way you’re always starin’ at me? Hmm, sweet girl?” God, if you were red before, now you were purple. Your skin was prickling, not just at the acknowledgment of your behaviour but at his sudden use of pet names. You couldn’t force words out even if you tried. “Why’d’you think I avoid you like you’re the plague?” With his face inches from yours, it was now easy to see that there was almost desperation in his eyes, like he was losing a battle, unable to let go of his grip still.

“B…Because, you, you hate me.” You finally stuttered out, your throat dry from the heaving breathing.

“Christ, no, I don’t hate you, darlin’, I just can’t stop myself when you’re in front of me, staring at me with those big o’eyes, looking like you’re just about ready to drop to your knees.” There was still no answer to your question, you still didn’t understand, you so desperately wanted to understand. Especially after watching the way he licked his lips, his burning stare taking in every inch of you, “And to think, you’ve been sat there, squeezin’ your legs together, and you don’t even know what you’re doing.”

“I, I, I don’t understand, what you’re saying, Joel.” Your chest was rising and falling, a sweat blanketing the both of you, his grip loosening but letting his hands travel further up your arms until they were at your back.

“Let me show you.” Was all he could muster out until his lips were on yours. He crashed against you, pulling you into him by your back. You fought for a moment at first, out of shock at his abruptness, but it did not take you long to be pressing your body against his, your fingers getting lost in his hair, gripping and tugging whilst he groaned into your mouth. His tongue found its way against yours, tasting every part of you, savouring the moment as you whimpered. You pulled away for a moment to catch your breath and he rested his forehead against your, “We shouldn’t be doing this.” The ache was taking over your body now, like it was all for him, making you force your lips on him again.

“Please, Joel, please,” You purred into him, his hand reaching down to your ass, gripping it hard, “please, I’m aching.”

“Baby, you don’t know what you’re doin’ to me,” he growled, his free hand reaching up to your neck, “you don’t know what you’re asking for.”

“Please show me, I need you.” Begging, you ignored how right he was, you were sure what you needed but you needed it fast. The tension was becoming unbearable, you needed release.

He held you close by the small of your back, gently lowering you down until your back touched the ground and he was on top of you. Looking up at him through your lashes, you were ready to do anything he asked of you, your entire body feeling like it was electric. He continued kissing you, moving his lips down your jaw, down your neck, sucking and unbuttoning your shirt with an experienced hand. There was still a little bit of disbelief inside you, a failure to believe that Joel Miller, who 2 minutes prior you believed hated you, was on top of you undressing you. The anticipation for his next move was unlike anything you’d experienced before. “God, I’ve thought about this,” His voice vibrated across your chest, your body lifting to meet his lips, your bra exposing your cleavage, “now look at you, angel, whimperin’ for me like a bitch in heat.” He was grinding his hips, pressing his hard bulge into where you needed him most.

“Please, it hurts, Joel.” There was nothing you needed more than what he was giving you, the friction of denim rubbing together was nothing cooling the burning sensation between your legs.

“I know, baby, I know.” He grumbled, “m’gonna show you, jus’ takin’ my time.”

Kisses were descending south down your body, soft red marks left in their wake. He was taking his time, occasionally glancing up at your wide, blown out eyes. He wanted to show you exactly what he’d meant. Exactly what he’d meant. When he finally reached the waistline of your jeans, he tapped your thighs, signalling for you to lifts your hips so he could begin to pull them down your legs and then off your body entirely, taking your white cotton panties with them. You instinctively pressed your knees together, immediately feeling exposed in front of Joels large frame.

He tutted, “Ain’t no use bein’ shy now, sweet girl, you gotta show me where you need me.”

You did as you were told, spreading your legs, whilst he knelt back, palming the growing tent in his jeans. “that’s it, good girl.” groaning, he leant forward, lowering his body to meet yours, “Look at how wet she’s got f’me, you might not know what I mean, but she definitely does.” A sadistic chuckle left his throat, watching you squirm under his intense gaze.

Your body jolted when one of his fingers gently slid up your folds, collecting the wetness and slick, leaving you unable to breathe. No one had ever touched you there, not even yourself, and here was Joel Miller, slack jawed, toying with your hole however he pleased. He did slow motions up and down, watching as you glistened in the dim light. You had no idea you were capable kf feeling this feeling, a tingling sensation rippling in waves along with his touch. You were absentmindedly grinding your dripping cunt in motion with him, your eyes flickering shut whilst your head rolled back. “that’s right, baby girl, feels good don’t it?” Joel cooed through a smirk, watching intently as you rubbed against him.

“mmhmm,” You hummed in a daze, this must’ve been what he was talking about, “so good.” And with your admission of pleasure, a small smile dancing over your lips, he took his hand away. Your head snapped up and you propped yourself on your elbows, looking down at him with pouted wet lips. He took little notice of your reaction, instead he wrapped his arm around your thighs positioning his face opposite your throbbing pussy.

Before you had time to question why he was so close, he showed you. He dove into like a you were water and he was in a drought. Gasping, you watched with your jaw wide, panting whilst he licked and sucked at you, his tongue exploring every inch of you. “Joel, fuck, my god, what are you doing?” you panted, your chest rising and falling heavily.

“Well,” he spoke between breaths, “I’m tasting you, darlin’ and boy, don’t you taste sweet.” he continued on, watching your breathing growing erratic, the torment his tongue was bestowing on you causing your eyes to roll back into your head, a hand holding onto his forearm. “your old boyfriend never came down for a taste?”

“No” Just when you thought you couldn’t feel any better, he brought you to a new high. One which made you sure that this was what he was talking about surely it didn’t get better than this. Feeling his beard scratching against your thighs, seeing the absolute sheer pleasure in his eyes as his tongue fucked itself into your hole.

“He was missing’ out, I’ll tell you that much, sweetheart.” It was a smug scoff. He was immensely enjoying the effect he was having on you. See you wriggle, unable to keep still, holding your hips firmly down to the ground so he could have his way with the sweet pussy in his mouth. Knowing that his mouth was the only one to taste you, to savour and relish in the taste of you, god he felt like one lucky man.

The pit that started in your stomach had now grown and blossomed to take over your entire body, it was consuming and controlling you. Your back arched off the ground, only remaining anchored by Joel firm hands, you let one of your hands grab fistfuls of Joel’s hair, pushing him closer against you, whilst your other hand took to your breast, pinching at your hardened nipple underneath the restrictions of the bra. You cared not for the noises you made, filling the otherwise silent forest with salacious moans and Joel’s name. If a search party had been sent out for you, they’d definitely find you. They’d find you laying half naked, fucking yourself on Joel tongue. It was nearly shameful how much you were at his expense. The grip was gone from one of your thighs, your weak leg dropping to the ground giving him a wide access as you planted your foot on his back. He leant back for a moment before pursing his lips and spitting directly onto your already drooling cunt, making you flinch.

“look at me, pretty girl.” He took a breath, your eyes meeting his, “god, what a sight for sore eyes, so pretty, look at me.” babbling his took your moment of distraction as a invite to insert two of his thick fingers into your hole, smiling again with wet lips, the juices from your pussy dampening his beard and shinning off of his prominent nose. Your eyelids fluttered as you struggled to make eye contact with him, your lip between your teeth to hard you were sure it was going to draw blood. at first he made sure to slowly let you adjust to the stretch of his fingers, feeling your walls constrict around his digits. “mmm, thatta girl, taking my fingers so well, is that nice?” His praise made you fumble, unable to form sentences, only being able to respond with a over ambitious nod of your head, pouting with beads of sweat dribbling down your temples. “I bet it’s nice, no one’s ever touched you like this, huh? My needy girl, following me around, so full of desire with no where to go.” You continued nodding, hypnotised by his words, his fingers curling to reach a spot, overwhelming you, tears prickling in your eyes. Your stomach was tight, the pressure building and building, your knees growing weak. “My girl.” He repeated to himself, looking your up down as if he was admiring his handiwork.

“M’all yours.” It left your throat involuntarily, strangled and choked, pathetic.

“All mine?” He huffed incredulously, “Yes you are, all mine, christ girl.” His mouth returned to the mess he had made made, lips wrapping around and pulling at your clip, releasing with a wet pop. You hissed and tugged at his hair, his nose smushed against your skin, sniffing and smelling as much of your natural scent as he could. He couldn’t remember the last time he ate a pussy this intoxicating, or if he ever even had.

Something was about to rupture in you, it panicked you, washing over your body. You were unable to breathe, unable to release the grip you had on him, your eyes widening as you trembled against joel’s mouth. “Joel.” you squeaked out and he looked up at you with dark eyes, “what’s, fuck, I’m…” Your heart pounded in your chest and in your ears, you could barely focus, unable to form a sentence, or even get a word out.

“that’s right, go on, let it out,” his warm breath fanned against your sensitive area, “make a mess, let go f’me, soak my finger.” He was rattling you and egging you on, seeing your pathetic, writhing, sweating body in front of him.

Once more, you did as you were told. And holy shit.

It was like your entire body was on vibrate, toes curling, unable to even make noise. Stars were bursting behind your squeezed shut eyes, body lifted forward off the ground. “That’s my girl, there she is, fucking hell, give it to me, darlin’” He groaned, digging his hips into the ground, watching you come undone. The tension was being released in constricting waves, your walls clenching and squeezing around his fingers, which remained still, but still putting pressure on the spot they had previous being stroking relentlessly.

“oh my god, Joel, fuck me, oh my god, fuck, fuck.” When you could finally breathe again, you whined his name, cursing and crying a stream of profanities, his fingers leaving you empty whilst his tongue lapped up every precious drop of your high. It took a couple blinks for your vision to come back at when it did, you were met by the proud grin plastered on his face.

“what was it you said earlier? somethin’ ‘bout me losin’ m’touch in m’old age?” He teased, before putting the fingers that had been in you, into his mouth. He sucked them dry, letting his eyes roll back into his head for a second. “Sure didn’t seem to mind my touch when you were choking my fingers.”

“what was that?” You almost lost your voice, your throat dry. Joel was working his way up your body, kissing you and nibbling at your salty skin.

“That, my darlin’, was what I meant.” His teeth pulled at your earlobe and you took deep breaths before letting your fingers nimbly start to unbutton his own flannel.

“Do it again.” You pleaded, staring into his brown eyes, trying to rid him of his shirt as quickly as possible.

“Christ, you are needy,” He stopped his kisses, “she’s already wanting more? it feel that good?”

“Please, do it again, I want more.” You were completely possessed by the pleasure you had felt, gagging to feel more, you wanted him carnally, to have as much of him as possible.

“Use your words, what do you want?” He was enjoying this too much for someone who had previously stated how wrong it was. He was going to give in, there was no way he couldn’t with his cock so painfully hard in his pants, he just wanted to relish in having you beg for him some more.

The truth is that he’d spent plenty of time watching you. When you first came to town and Maria set you in the cabin next door, Joel had watched you. In fact, his bedroom window had been so perfectly placed so that at the right time of night, when you stepped out the shower he could make out your outline behind your curtains. In these moments, Joel would let himself indulge in all the dirty, perverted thoughts he’d kept locked up. He take his manhood in his hand and pleasure himself at the thought of feeling your skin against his, the thought of you whimpering and offering yourself, spread apart, for him. He’d thought many times about bounding through the door, ruining whatever was left of your innocence. He hadn’t, however, imagined that you had this much innocence left. And he would’ve never imagined in his wildest dreams that you’d be begging him for more, for him ruin you.

“I want you, I want you to fill me up, to stretch me.” You were speaking whatever came to mind, no thinking, just action, tumbling over your words with the grace of a bull in a china shop. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing, your eyes fucked out, hair matted and wild. This was enough for him to give in, allowing you to push his shirt down his arms, revealing his tanned skin and soft belly. Hair scattered below his waistline and you were eager to find where it lead to.

“You’re gonna be the death of me, girl.” He cursed, watching your small hands struggled with his belt buckle. When he’d agreed to help teach you hunting, this is the last place he thought he’d be.

He ended up undoing his belt himself, your frantic hands proving useless, but this meant you got to watch with wide, hungry eyes as his cock slapped his lower stomach, red and swollen with pre-cum beading at the tip. You were speechless, gulping, unsure of whether it would even fit. After he’d discarded of his jeans, reaching round and pumping his shaft in his fist. You were starving for him, the way he looked in this light, completely bare in front of you. He came down to your height, lips against yours, tongue in your mouth. “Can you taste yourself? Taste how sweet you are?” You purred a yes into the kiss and he pulled away, grabbing your chin between his thumb and finger. “taste good don’t you?” His half-lidded eyes remained fixed on the way you licked your lips and smiled sweetly at him, as if you were completely angelic. “yeah, you like it? ‘Course you do, jesus.” He shook, he wasn’t gonna last long with you looking the way you did, feeling the way you did. “how do you want it?” He was buying himself time, his cock already twitching just at the thought of being inside you.

“I’ve never done it, from behind.” Your voice was quiet and unsure, you’d clearly never been asked how you wanted it and now you felt like there was a right and wrong answer. However with the way Joel immediately grabbed you, flipping you over with a squeeze so that you laid on your stomach, you realised that maybe you picked right.

“Now,” he straddled your thighs, grabbing and kneading at your bare ass, spreading your cheeks and planting his cock between them, “it’s been a while,” he rocked his hips gently, watching the way his cock pushed through your plush cheeks, getting lost, “I ain’t tryin’ to make excuses-”

“Please, please, I’m begging you,” you pleaded, arching your back and pushing against him, his balls dragging against your pussy causing him to shiver, all the hairs on his body standing on end, “I want you to give it to me again, Joel, it’s aching again, I’m aching for you.” You tried your best to crane your neck, so that you could make eye contact with him and he took it as an opportunity to grab you by the neck.

“M’gonna give it to you, baby girl, you ready?” His lips brushed against your forehead before resting there, so you whimpered in response before he plunged into you.

He stretched you out in a way that burned. It felt like you were being torn and you evidently winced and hissed and the intrusion of his cock. He, on the other hand, had just entered into heaven. The way you wrapped around him so tight and perfectly had him choking on his low groans, basking in watching your pussy so delightfully swallow every inch he had to give you before stopping at the base. You needed a moment, clenching your fists and squeezed your eyes shut, you needed to adjust to having something of his sheer size inside you. He needed a moment because he was sure if he made any sudden movements, he was going to spill inside you immediately, before he had even had a chance to get you remotely close to your climax. “god, you’re so fucking tight, she’s takin’ me real good.” He kissed at your forehead again, trying to distract himself from the way you were squirming. You knot in your stomach was growing again and the pain was soon numbed out, awaiting his movement.

“you’re so big.” whining, you fluttered your lashes, splaying your hands out in front of you, preparing yourself.

“I know, baby, you ready for it?”

“Yes,” You were practically gasping for air, making puppy dog eyes at him through your eyelashes, watching him twitch, “please, Joel, please.”

Against his better judgement, Joel began thrusting his hips slowly into you, watching your expression twist, eyes squeezed shut, mouth wide open. You mewled and whimpered, knuckles turning white as you gripped at nothing. You looked pathetic beneath him, surrendering yourself entirely. And he ate it all up. He was enthralled, blinking down at you, watching tears form at the corners of your eyes, your freckles hiding beneath a red flush. This was heaven.

He rocked into you fervently, pushing in and pulling out moans. His grip around your neck kept your face in constant view, his breath fanning over your skin. “You look so beautiful, baby, taking this cock.” He grunted out between the snap of his hips, reaching deeper inside you than anyone had before, your soft velvet walls wrapping around him, clenching and contracting to accommodate his girth. Your lips couldn’t form words, stuck open wide, panting, your tongue resting on your bottom lip.

You felt so full, feeling him in your belly, grazing your cervix with ease. His free hand traveled from your hips, holding you safe and firm, to squeeze a handful of your ass, painfully hard. It caused you to yelp, pushing your hips into him, making his thrust halt for a moment as he shuddered. He was trying desperately hard to not cum embarrassingly fast. He felt like a teenager again, trying to divert his thoughts to anything other than the writhing body he was currently impaling with his throbbing cock. But the way you were pushing back on him, begging him constantly with that drunken look in your eyes, like he was the only other person on the planet. He couldn’t ignore it, no matter how much he though about what needed fixing at home, all his thoughts returned to you.

“More.” You choked out. And he raised an eyebrow.

“More? More what, sweetheart?” He punctuated by giving a hard thrust that left you shaking.

“Harder, I want it- Oh fuck!” Interrupting you, he took advantage and began ramming into you mid sentence, taking immense pleasure in watching you become undone around his relentless torment.

He let go of your ass and your neck, picking you up by your hips so you were on your knees, check pressed against the ground. There was an excited smile on your face, cheeks aching and hot. “You smilin’ girl? Yeah? You like it like this, feel good don’t it?” Whilst you couldn��t see his face, you could hear he was groaning through a grin too, keeping your legs steady so he could quicken his already brutal pace.

There it was again, that growing pit, the flush of electricity that erupted into your body. Your grin only grew, whining and spreading your legs out further for him, allowing him to go deeper and deeper with each groundbreaking thrust. Your legs were trembling, your knees aching and surely bruised up. But it was the last thing on your mind, all you could think about was the impending surge of pleasure. “Hell, look at you,” Joel growled, swallowing hard, “You fuckin’ love it.”

“I… Do, don’t stop!” You spread your legs further, thighs falling downwards, ignoring the burning sensation at the slightly uncomfortable position that you knew you’d regret tomorrow.

“Oh darlin, I ain’t gonna be able t’hold on much longer, not wit’you spreading your fuckin’ legs like this f’me.” Joel was holding on for dear life, becoming desperate. He knew you were close, he could feel it in the way your cunt was becoming tighter and tighter, dripping with arousal, slick running down his thighs getting lost in the hair.

“Mmmhmm, I want it daddy, fill me up.” Your words were slurred and he tensed at what you’d called him.

“Yeah, baby girl, you want daddy deep in you?” He leant over you, palm pressing against the side of your head, pushing you further against the wooden floorboards. His thumb fell just above your mouth, sitting on your lips until you wrapped them around it, sucking gently. You nodded, your body beginning to tense and tremble.

This was shameful stuff, Joel thought, stuff people go to confession and repent for. Here you were, on your hands and knees, offering yourself up, sucking his thumb, fluttering your lashes. You were either the most beautiful angel or a demon sent to lead him astray. Either way, he was relishing in it.

“Come on baby, I know it’s-”

“Oh, Daddy, I'm gonna- it’s coming, I’m-” Your frantic moans came out tumbling over his, interrupting him, arching your back up, your entire body clenching at you were engulfed in pleasure again. “Oh, Joel, Oh my god, you, f, f, feel, so good!” You didn’t care about your volume, you just cared about how amazing it felt to have Joels cock deep inside you as you twitched and writhed around him. You pushed your ass against him, trying to get him as far in you as possible.

Joel couldn’t stop himself, spilling into you will a prolonged broken groan, one hand grabbing a fistful of your hair, the other grasping on your hip, his head snapped back. He could’ve been having a heart attack, the way his heart was pounding in his ears. You could feel him pumping inside of you, each twitch and rope painting your insides.

“Oh, sweet girl, Christ!” He panted out of breath, riding out his high, jutting his hips forward into you as you breathed heavily beneath him, sensitive to every one of his movements. “You’re gon’ be the death of me, girl.” He fell over you, his weight pinning you down, pulling his softening cock out of you.

He rolled to the side of you, you remained laying on your front, thighs trembling, aching too much to move positions. “You still in there?” He raised his eyebrows, brushing hair behind your ear as you look up at him in adoration, big eyes filled with want. A giggle left your lips as his chest rose and fell in deep loud breaths. “What’re you laughin’ at?”

“Is it like that every time?” Coarse, your voice creeped out, wiggling closer to him as he rubbed the bridge of his nose with his calloused hand.

“No,” sighing, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling your tired frame into his, immediately soaking in the warmth, “that was… somethin' else.”

You were quick to fall asleep in his arms. You knew you were safe, your body aching and weak. You were engulfed in his scent, head resting nestled into his armpit, soaking it all in.

He’d opened a can of worms, swarmed by thoughts he’d tried to suppress, watching you curl up next to him. He could not shake the image of you coming undone around him, surrendering so easily to him. It was so much better than he’d ever imagined, but now he’d acted on these thoughts, he could no longer suppress them. He couldn’t avoid you, the only act of indulgence he’d allowed himself was watching you through your window. Now he hadn’t just indulged himself, he’d submerged himself in you. He was ashamed. He should’ve known better.

______________________________________________________________

“Get up, gotta head back.”

You were awoken, your shirt being thrown at you, crumpled over your chest. Your eyes took a moment to adjust, sunlight seeping into the cabin. You blinked a few times, a shadow breaking up the sunlight. Your body ached like you’d ran a marathon. “Hey, Kid, wake up.” His stern abrupt voice, causing you to pout, instinctively bringing your shirt up to cover your breasts.

Joel was standing opposite you, fully dressed, bag on his shoulders, towering over you with a fed up expression painting his features. You blinked up at him a few times, frowning, confused. “Do I gotta say it a third time? Jesus Christ.” He muttered under his breath, shaking his head, turning his back on you to walk out the cabin.

A tsunami wave of embarrassment and shame flooded through you. Feeling your cheeks turning hot and purple, scrambling to get your bra and clothes on, eyes scanning the floor for your belongings. You pulled your socks on, searching for your panties. They’d seemingly disappeared. But due to Joels passive aggressive sighs outside, you decided they were a lost cause. Pulling your jeans up your legs without them. You felt dirty, your inner thighs still sticky and wet, his cum smeared across them. His coldness was causing you to do flips in your tummy. When you finally met him outside the cabin, he muttered something else under his breath and then began walking without a word.

You kept your eyes down to the ground, tail between your legs, walking in silence. You felt the tension in between you two. Like you’d upset him. Like you’d done something wrong. He didn’t dare look back at you, ignoring every noise you made, cursing every twig you stepped on reminding him you were there. And reminding him where he’d been. Reminding him of the touch of your soft skin, how small you felt in his arms, the way you were whimpering his name begging for him. He couldn’t bare it, knowing you were behind him, eyes distraught, the carpet swept from beneath you.

Your mind was elsewhere, trying to figure out where you’d messed up, what it was that was wrong. Everything had felt so right, so so good. What was it that you did that had angered him so much. You didn’t notice the branch within the leaves in front of you and you tripped slightly, falling forward, only to be caught by Joels strong hands. “Would you just watch what you’re doin’?” He bit, lip twitching, staring you directly in the eye, hands gripping onto your arms for a moment too long.

“Did I do something wrong?” You swallowed, watching him turn around on his heel, shaking his head again, like you were asking something outlandish, “I mean.. was I… was I not very good? I know I don’t have much experience but-” You were fumbling over your words again, insecurity threatening to spill from your eyes, Joel freezing in front of you.

“What we did was wrong, no matter how good it felt, for both of us.” He spoke stiff, refusing to look you in the eye when he turned around, refusing to acknowledge that you were holding back tears. “It was wrong.” He lifted his hands in front of him, as if to signal “enough”.

“But-”

“No, no, thats it end of.”

“You’re not even letting me-”

“Listen to me,” he stepped forward, now staring too directly in the eyes, inches from your face, steadying his breathing, “Last night should not have happened, It will not happen again and I’d appreciate you keepin’ it to yourself, it was a mistake, a lapse in judgment.”

His words stung. Like falling on your palms on gravel as a kid. Quick and lingering. You tried your best to hid your quivering bottom lip. You didn’t know how to respond, you didn’t know if he’d even let you. You decided against it. He’d humiliated you enough, you weren’t about to cry in front of him too.

You carried on the rest of the walk in silence. Like nothing had changed. Like you couldn’t still feel him dripping out of you. Like the ghost of your taste wasn’t still dancing on his tongue, on his lips. He could smell you all over him.

When you finally got back to town, you parted ways, the awkwardness radiating off of the both of you as you were welcomed back. He made you feel sick. It was all so embarrassing. The way he wouldn’t even look at you. But why would he? You were just one great big lapse in judgment. The return to your small cabin was lonely and you had barely gotten to your front door when you finally allowed yourself to cry. You allowed yourself one glance back at Joel, who was entering his own home, already staring you down. You sobbed a little, shooting him a cold glare before slamming you door shut behind you, sliding down it with your hands in your hair.

Joel felt guilt rotting inside him.

He entered his home alone, it was cold and he could still smell you all over him.

He took one hard step at a time, ascending his stairs, his bed creaking beneath his weight as he sat down, sighing.

He reached into his back pocket, pulling out the white cotton panties, the little satin ribbon on the front crumbled and slightly undone. Lifting them to his nose, he inhaled, your scent filling his nostrils and his brain. The image of you playing on repeat behind his eyelids, like an old movie on a projector.

And with one hand holding your panties to his nose and mouth, eyes fixated on your bathroom window, he let his other one fist his cock out of his jeans, stroking it slowly.

Back to square one.

#pedro pascal #joel miller #pedrohub #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #joel x reader #joel miller fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x you #last of us #the last of us

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godihatethiswebsite · 1 year ago

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Tethered Bonds

✽ Poly 141 x f!reader (Omegaverse AU)

A lucky stroke of fate led you right into the arms of your alpha soulmates. But is it everything you dreamed it would be or just the continuation of a nightmare?

Main Masterlist ✽ Ao3

✽ Part One - A twisted fate

I'm gonna be honest: this came to me in a tired, period induced haze and I have no idea what the hell I'm doing but the bunnies would not let me stop until I finished it. Was supposed to be a oneshot... until it wasn't XD Hoping this is just gonna be a short little pet project on the side. Lemme know if I missed any triggers!

Trigger warnings: SA (not by the 141), biting, claiming, angst, depression, self harm

[Edit 7/16/24: updated relationship tags]

The parking lot was a certified mess to navigate, a veritable winter hellscape with the continual snowfall keeping the pavement slick and churning around spinning wheels to create a thick dirty slush. Packed cars fought for spaces towards the front of the store, wanting to avoid the headache of trudging through sloppy sleet, heavy carts overflowing with expensive gifts and last minute groceries.

Parents loaded up their trunks for their upcoming banquets. Little ones chattered in youthful exuberance about brightly wrapped packages and a jolly fat man. Festively dressed bell ringers exhausted their muscles for the cause of charity, offering joyous smiles to those passing by gracious enough to offer a token. Even six inches of heavy wet snowfall were not enough to deter shoppers from their mood. Coupled with the obnoxiously boisterous music that met you at the door it was almost impossible not to get swept up in the infectious holiday spirit.

Almost.

You hadn’t bothered joining the chaotic dominance for prime parking, opting to choose the very last row towards the street instead of wasting precious minutes yelling profanities out the window to an uppity pack trying to steal your spot. The harsh wind burned your face and nipped at your skin, pulling the woolen scarf tighter around your neck and up over your bitten nose. You avoided eye contact with the chipper lady at the front, not wanting to feel guilty for not donating when you barely had enough to scrape by as it is.

Normally you avoided venturing out this close to Christmas unless absolutely necessary. Holidays haven't meant much to you in recent years since your parent’s untimely passing and you hated the constant reminder of ‘the most wonderful time of the year’. Sure, there were still your other two alpha fathers, but they’d opted for someplace warmer in their age and visitation was difficult with your busy work schedule. Your younger brother wasn’t almost worth mentioning with his new prissy family somewhere up north. That bridge was burned the day he called you a harlot.

Needless to say, you’d become something of a grinch.

You’d been miserably sick the week prior and ate through most of your stockpile of hoarded food, not enough remaining to keep blowing off shopping with the bustling crowds. If you wanted to last past New Years then a trip into town was unavoidable.

The intense blast of hot air from the overhead heaters thawed your aching bones upon entering the store, shaking the accumulated dampness from your head and shoulders but leaving the thick cloth covering the lower half of your face. It would help you in your endeavors to get through the aisles expediently without irritating your delicate omega olfactory senses.

It got harder to distinguish the source of fragrances this time of year, when folk spent their days burrowed away from the bitter cold surrounded by the comforts of the season. A chilled glass of rich subtly spiced eggnog, smokey cedar logs crackling in the hearth, sweet woodsy pine wreaths and garlands wrapped around thick oak banisters, trees decorated with peppermint candy canes and dried strings of popcorn.

Gingerbread, mulled wine, cinnamon, orange, clove; a bountiful buffet of complementary aromas. Your own father had smelled of cranberry sauce once upon a time (it made the holidays that much harder when he was gone). And with so many people filling the space - even with the heating fans working overtime trying to filter out most of it - it could get difficult trying to figure out whether a boozy scent originated from a lovely beta or the soaked rum cake she was placing in her cart.

Honestly if it weren't for the outrageous delivery fees you would've had the groceries dropped off instead of enduring the aggressive pheromones floating through the air. Alas this was one of your few exceptions to your hermit lifestyle.

Truthfully, it wasn’t just December that had you hesitant to leave the sanctuary of your meager apartment.

For the past few years, you’d been battling a severe case of agoraphobia, something you’d been working on wholeheartedly with a therapist since the accident that made you so. It had crippled you to the point that even daring to have the blinds open on your windows sent you spiraling into that dark abyss of cackling distress, panic consuming every last ounce of breath until you found yourself minutes later curled up on the bathroom floor, lightheaded and queasy.

Nausea was a constant in your life, along with the cold sweat that had you sleeping on a towel just to keep from ruining your bedsheets. Lethargy was embedded in your muscle fibers. A searing ache in your throat. The painful deep tugging in your chest an ever present reminder of the uphill battle you fought each time you opened your crusty sleep filled eyes. Depression was your best friend, curled around you in a false sense of comfort where it was easier to slip into a maladaptive headspace than face the truth of your harsh reality.

But despite the physical manifestations of your trauma, you’d made good strides so far with your weekly sessions. It had been a difficult road getting to this point and your therapist praised you for your dedication to not letting it hinder the life you had ahead. You weren’t sure what it looked like, but you tried all the same.

Like a hound that heard you calling, that ominous presence that filled you with dread came crawling into the back of your skull, mittened hand discreetly itching at the wool around your neck and scratching the irritated skin beneath. Forcing yourself to take a few deep breaths until it settled, you grabbed one of the many baskets available and began the trek weaving down the rows of food.

Christmas was about a week away and the mobs were out in full force. Thankfully the items you were on the hunt for were not the same ingredients needed by everyone else. There was the occasional overlap of things like milk, eggs, bread, etc. But there was no call for a full sized turkey or spiraled ham; no sweet potato casserole or chocolate yule log to bake. Just some bologna, shredded cheese, a couple packs of ramen, and a few other household things here you were running low on.

Maybe for the hell of it you’d stop in the frozen section and find yourself a mini cheesecake to splurge on for when you inevitably opened that bottle of fireball sitting on the shelf come next Tuesday, forced to listen to your upstairs neighbors' horrendous attempts at Christmas caroling.

Halfway through the store, your browsing was interrupted by an alluring scent swirling somewhere nearby.

Citrusy. Acidic. Sweet. Airy.

Your scarf had slipped off your face when you bent down to grab something off the lower racks, exposing you to the freshly baked goods across the way. Someone nearby was carrying a batch of lemon cupcakes, your mouth watering as the scent invaded your tastebuds and forced a pleasant hum from the back of your throat.

Something curled in your chest like a finger beckoning forward, begging for an acknowledgement that had you standing at rapt attention. Your body seemed to move on its own, head swiveling like a rickety chair, scanning the nearby vicinity - for what, you couldn’t say. The inner omega that prowled just underneath the surface vibrated restlessly, choking back a needy whine while your eyes swept over the closest individuals. Something primal had called out to you, throwing your hormones out of whack, piecing together invisible clues so obviously standing right in front of you.

The summery concoction felt so out of place in the harsh winter months, swirling and nagging at the base of your spine, urgent and loud and taking up too much space until you felt like you could drown in its tang–

Your muscles locked in place, gaze affixed to something - someone - at the end of the aisle.

A big someone. An alpha.

And he was massive.

There was a natural musculature that came with the inherited alpha genetics. Beta’s could grow to a similar size if they worked at it, but there was a casual arrogance that was impossible to mistake with the former designation. Even still, this man towered over most others in the vicinity, lesser alphas giving a wide berth to the intimidating figure currently staring down at his phone screen. Thick grey hoodie pulled up over his head, a black military jacket layered over top. Dark wash jeans led down to warm boots hefty enough to stomp a man’s skull in. Messy dark blonde hair peeked out from up top, a black surgical mask covering the lower half of his face from view.

He couldn’t have given off any more ‘don’t fuck with me’ vibes if he had it tattooed across his forehead. There was nothing sinister about his bearing per se - one hand casually shoved into a coat pocket as he leaned back against one of the dessert displays - but there was a coiled alertness that gave you the distinct impression he was more aware of his surroundings than he led you to believe.

One thing was for certain: you were never more sure of anything in your less than perfect life that that man was your scent match.

Your lungs expanded in your chest to drink in more of his scent. Palms turned sweaty, hair on the back of your neck prickled, the weight of the basket on your arm all but forgotten. Your throat parched at the prospect of getting to shove your face against his scent gland and taste the delectable lemony goodness right off his skin.

People went lifetimes never meeting their perfect scent matches. The odds of you ever encountering one wasn’t even worth holding out hope for. Over seven billion people on the planet and you had to win an epic fucking lottery to get as lucky as you just did. Bonding ceremonies like that made the news for how rare it was. You’d never even dreamed of this happening, making peace with the idea that mates only existed in fairytale romance.

You just about dropped your groceries when he was joined shortly thereafter by another gorgeous male, slightly shorter by a few inches and not as broadly built. Rich dark skin, effortlessly cool street style, short black curls, and a dazzling pearly white smile.

This new alpha didn’t seem to flinch in the presence of the other, lemon cupcake glancing up only briefly to acknowledge the newcomer whose toasted coconut aroma barrelled right into you, colliding like a runaway freight at an unguarded intersection. Gulping down mouthfuls of air like a fish heaving on dry land, your head spun wildly at the nutty intrusion; smokey yet sweet, conjuring images of a warm evening bonfire on a lush sandy beach.

Hope bloomed in your chest something fierce and bright. Your omega preened in unbridled delight, pawing at the surface, eager to get her hands on the two beautiful specimens whose every atom screamed ‘mine’. Tears stung behind your eyes, a mixture of relief and elation, vibrant like bursting fireworks and twinkling Christmas lights.

What would you say to them? Do you approach them first? Should you wait for them to scent you back or try to pretend you didn’t smell them yet? What did their voices sound like? You could see their lips moving, even if the ones’ were hidden behind a surgical mask. Tenor, baritone, rumbly bass? What were their names? Where did they live? Was this really happening right now?!

Something twisted and gnarled sunk its claws into your subconscious, rearing its ugly head in protest at the newfound revelation, but for the first time in years you didn’t fucking care.

They were here. Your alphas. Your pack. Your salvation.

“Babes!”

Decadent chocolate floated past you, a small apology from her lips as the omega brushed by, bumping her arm against yours on the way to her intended destination. You’d hardly noticed, too caught up in your own inner monologue and girlish fantasies to barely manage a quiet ‘no worries’.

For a split second, your eyes met coconut’s beautiful luscious brown, breath catching in your throat as the object of your desire finally seemed to take note of your existence. It was like gazing into the threads of the universe, pulling taut between you in a cosmic symphony that brought your stardust back together from whence it scattered at the dawn of time.

A perfect part of an incomplete whole.

…until those shimmering umber pools shifted left, aimed at the bubbly figure headed right towards them.

Huh?

Confusion as both alphas turned their full undivided attention to the dark haired omega, holding out a box of something for them to inspect and smiling when it met their approval, an affectionate pat on the head from lemon for her success that left her beaming with pride.

That’s when you noticed it - peeking out underneath the collar of her elegant peacoat. A faint white crescent moon shaped scar, standing out against her lightly tanned skin, a matching one a little farther down.

Mating bites. A bonded omega.

And your scent matched alphas were gazing lovingly at her as if she’d hung the stars.

She was theirs. They’d already found their mate.

And it wasn’t you.

Something died in your chest, a broken scream torn silent from your soul as it condensed into a burning black hole. Agony unlike anything you’ve ever known, piercing your fragile heart and burrowing like a plague into your veins until the sickness had spread to every corner of your being. Your omega clawed at her eyes, willing the visions in front of you to vanish like a twisted mirage, begging for a bullet to erase the image of coconut planting a soft forehead kiss before wrapping an arm around her waist and turning to leave.

A dejected whine ripped from your throat as you took an unconscious step forward, hand vaguely outreached, instincts screaming to chase after them and make them choose you instead of her. But you did no such thing. You watched helplessly as the alphas who were supposedly destined for you by the stars turned their backs on your pathetic existence.

This couldn't be happening. Why was this happening?! Please turn around!!!

With the same circulating air that had guided their scents to you, the wind in the store shifted.

Lemon cupcake went ramrod straight, whipping his head around so fast you were worried it’d go flying off his shoulders. It was uncanny the way he immediately zeroed in on your poor trembling figure, standing in the middle of a crowded aisle, uncaring to the concerned glances of the other shoppers as he unknowingly ruined your life.

Recognition sparked deep behind voided irises before going completely neutral, steeling his expression but remaining unmoving as stone. It’s like the two of you were locked into place, orbiting each other by an invisible tether, watery eyes begging the ones staring back to please… please not leave you behind.

Coconut halted in his own step at the end of the aisle, sniffing the air for a moment with a furrowed brow, glancing over his shoulder at lemon, asking him something too far away to overhear. You can only assume the contents of his reply, the slightest shift of his mask the only tell he’d responded before coconut turned to face you as well.

This time garnered more of a physical reaction than the last, jaw dropping while staring just as unabashedly as his alpha companion. Eyes swept from head to toe, cataloging every minute detail the same as you’d done to them. Pupils dilated exponentially, nostrils flaring taking in the crisp pear scent you exuded, memorizing every facet and swallowing it down like a ravenous predator.

What a sight you must’ve made; eyes red and puffy from the tears that now flowed freely from suffering instead of the earlier jubilation, meek and sheepish and falling apart at the seams. What a piss poor impression to give the men fated to be your mates.

There was a brief moment where coconut seemed to match your initial energy, a flash of something saccharine and longing, only for it to collapse under the grueling weight of our fatalistic reality. There was an internal struggle in the crease of his brow, the downturned expression souring behind clenched teeth and tight fists. But more than that there was pity - pity at how you couldn’t have met sooner. Pity that you’d had to discover them like this, a woman on their arm and bite marks on her neck. Pity that they hadn’t had faith that they would be the lucky ones in a packed society.

You can make out a question on the chocolate omega’s perfectly pouty lips, trying to put the jigsaw together as to why her alphas were suddenly acting this way while glancing between the three of you.

Ignoring her, coconut takes a half step forward; you take two steps back. There’s an apology in your watery eyes, a hushed ‘merry christmas’ too strained for their ears. Your heart’s beating too loudly, your breath comes too shallow. You don’t even realize you’re sucking in heaving sobs until a gentle hand of a passerby lands on your shoulder, snapping you out of the chaos of your psyche.

You can’t take it any more; the shame, the embarrassment, the gut wrenching defeat.

The basket falls to the floor with a loud clatter, startling the people nearby who let out shrieks and gasps of surprise as the spilled contents inside break open and shatter. Eggs crack, milk pours onto the mud trekked tile, a fragile jar of strawberry jam splatters across someones pristine boots with an indignant shout.

A smooth tenor voice calls out ‘WAIT’, but you’ve already rounded the corner, barreling through the crowds of happy smiles and ecstatic giggles, too torn up inside to feel anything but desolation at the future so cruelly ripped from your fingers.

The crisp frigid air smacks the breath from your lungs, winter boots slapping on the slushy frozen ground. The squeal of brakes accompanies you as you sprint uncaringly through the bustling traffic, horns honking and voices shouting, muffled and far away as you drown in the whirlwind of your mind. It’s a miracle you’re not hit by a car, an even bigger one that you make it back to your own unscathed.

Slamming the car door shut, you smack your padded palms repeatedly against the steering wheel, banshee wailing your vocal cords raw in despair. The dark presence creeps in once more, a mocking chill down your spine as it caresses your fractured soul. The nausea comes back full force, the tugging on your chest, the burning in your throat. There’s a desperation as you tear your fitted mittens off, reaching under the woolen scarf and incessantly scratching at the irritated skin until it shreds under your nails. The pain doesn't register through your emotional torment, blocking out the inner voice until it inevitably slinks back into the shadows after its bitter lick of victory.

Panting hard, your head slumps back against the cloth headrest, stewing in the silence of misery and defeat, the distant joyful bells of Christmas the only company you have on this cold winter’s night.

It takes a few tries to fit the key in your deadbolt, blinking through tears now frozen to your eyelashes. There’s no recollection of how you even made it home in your brittle mental state. For all you knew were twelve civilians flattened like pancakes on the side of the road and a warrant out for your arrest.

Wouldn’t that be nice? A break from having to pay bills and function like an adult.

Stumbling through the door, the sparse furnishings of your minimal studio glare at you, flipping them off as you shuck the damp outer layers from your frail form. A mess to be cleaned up another day.

It wasn't just the rejection of your fated mates you were facing. It was the knowledge that your entire future had been ripped away and no amount of hot glue could piece it back together. Today’s revelation was the final nail in the coffin for the rest of your life.

The bathroom lights flickered with dying bulbs, something that had been on your shopping list tonight and was now being swept off the floor along with everything else you’d left behind. It didn’t stop you from locating the first aid kit under your sink, setting it on the ceramic counter and pulling out the well loved supplies inside.

You avoided staring at your gaunt reflection, not wanting to see the person looking back as you tugged at the thick scarf looped around your neck. The constricting material tore away with ease, falling into a discarded heap on the floor, revealing the torn mottled flesh hidden underneath.

Your own set of crescent shaped scars - where the line of your neck connected to the meat of your shoulder, long since healed over and faded with time. The area surrounding it was now swollen and inflamed, raised angry red lines dotted with scrapes like a bad case of road rash, bloody from where you'd furiously clawed at your neck on the car ride home. The only time the fucker in your head shuts up - the connection tethering you emotionally gone silent once he got tired of feeling physical pain across the bond.

Memories came unbidden. Flashes of that fateful encounter coming home late from work, dragged into a sequestered shadowy overhang a few meters down the darkened alleyway. A feral alpha hopped up on something illegal, tearing into your clothes and violating the virginal space between your thighs. The muffled cries as he overpowered you, panting through a rut with his greasy fingers shoved down your throat to silence you, gagging on the musky taste. The scream as his teeth pierced your flesh, the bond snapping taut and stealing your future from you without a thought to your own wishes.

He’d fucked you ragged that night, waking up with your cheek pressed into the damp pavement and his arm slung around your waist from hours earlier. There’d been no one to turn to, no one who would care. By law now you were his - no matter the means it had been done.

A mating bite was binding.

You’d crawled away from him, your outfit in tatters hanging loosely over your bruised form, dried blood stuck to your neck and a stabbing pain at your apex. You felt dirty and used and wanted nothing more than to strip the skin from your bones. The unconscious form of the– your alpha flopped prone on his back, crimson stains around his mouth and his flaccid cock still half out of his trousers. The pinpricks on his arm told the tale of a junkie. It’s possible he hadn’t even been fully aware of the crime he’d committed.

You didn’t stick around to find out.

But you paid for that decision harshly, opting for a life not attached to your abuser, at a steep tormented cost. Bonds weren’t meant to be strained for so long. It starts to cause negative impacts on the pair, the omega bearing the worst of the brunt. Nausea, sweating, pain, dizziness, fatigue. The chronic illnesses you endured day in and day out would stay with you for the rest of your life. So long as he was up and walking free - alive somewhere on the other side of the country - his greasy claws strumming your senses through the connection tethering you eternally.

Only a perfect scent match could override the original bite and free you from the oppressive bonds that shackled you to an invisible alpha - the last remaining hope you had at any semblance of happiness.

And you just lost it.

>> ✿ Next ✿ >>

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nattikay · 7 months ago

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Aww, that's very sweet of you to say! I'm glad I can inspire you 😸 Although I feel obligated to clarify that I am definitely not flawless with Na'vi hrh...even having been studying for about two and a half years now, I still make mistakes! But that's a normal part of learning, so that's ok :)

pela'ang, lam fwa ramìl ikranit oey fmeri yivom? D: what the crap, it seems the mountain is trying to eat my ikran?

#if/when i catch mistakes in my comics and such I try to point them out and explain them #(in my more recent ones at least...i'm sure if you go back to like my 2022 comics when I was still a beginner you'll find plenty more)#(which I haven't bothered to correct cuz I just haven't looked at them in ages lol)#(maybe that'd be an entertaining project to work on sometime...reblogging some of my old Na'vi comics just to correct the grammar)#well we'll see hrh #anyways even in my recent ones...I try to correct mistakes if/when I catch them #but some can still slip under the radar 😅#especially when writing longer blocks of text...it can be very easy to accidentally miss a case ending or something #when I did my Rimun and the Cave audio story I was 99% through editing it #only to suddenly realize that I had to go back and re-record a line last-minute because I forgot a -T ending 🙃#it happens lol

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stillbornfrost · 2 months ago

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Squid Game 2(Thanos Team):

You ignore them for voting the opposite vote

Featuring: Thanos(230), Nam-gyu(124), Min-su(125), Se-mi(380), and Gyeong-su(256)

(Edit) this isn't proof read so apologies, but I am working on a yandere Nam-gyu head cannons. It will be uploaded in a bit.

Warnings: implied drug use

Thanos

You haven't looked at him since the vote.

Not once.

Thanos sits on the edge of his bed, elbows on knees, hands clenched together. He doesn’t say anything for a while. Just stares ahead, jaw tight. You’re a few feet away, but might as well be across the world.

Finally, he speaks. Voice low. Flat.

“You’re mad ‘cause I voted blue.”

You don’t answer.

He nods to himself. Like yeah, that tracks. Still staring ahead. He hasn’t had a fix. It’s starting to show.

“You wanted out. I saw your face. You thought I’d press red too.”

He glances at you—just a second, then away again. Eyes narrowed like he's thinking too hard about what he's not saying.

“…I couldn’t do it.”

A beat.

“Out there? There’s nothin’. No money. Nothin’ waiting for me but a cold street and maybe a needle.”

He breathes through his nose. Shaky. Angry at himself.

“In here... I have a shot.”

“We had a shot.”

That one hits different. He doesn’t say things like that. Not to anyone.

You shift, but still say nothing. His jaw tightens again. He finally looks straight at you.

“I thought you got it. Thought you got me.”

And then, quieter:

“…Guess I was wrong.”

He stands up, slow and heavy, like the day aged him ten years. Walks past you without looking. Shoulders squared like he's trying not to care.

But his hands are shaking.

Nam-gyu

you start ignoring nam gyu after he votes blue to stay in the game and it kills him, but he’ll die before he says it out loud.

at first he acts like he doesn’t care. rolls his eyes when you walk past him without a glance, mumbles “real mature” under his breath like it doesn't bother him. but the second you’re out of sight, his whole expression drops. like he’s been punched in the chest. every single time.

he tries to play it cool—throws jokes around louder when you're nearby, starts picking fights just to show off, hoping you’ll look at him. you don’t. not once. and it eats at him like rust.

he’ll sit not too far from you during meals, way closer than necessary, pretending it’s a coincidence. tapping his foot, clearing his throat, drumming his fingers on the side of one of the beds—louder, more annoying, anything to make you say something. you never do.

he starts watching you like a hawk when you sleep. it’s not even on purpose at first. he just... needs to know you're okay. and if anyone gets too close to your bunk, he’s suddenly wide awake, full of threats and snarling teeth. “keep walking.”

he starts muttering to himself more. talking at you even if you don’t respond. “they keep pairing us with idiots,” he’ll say loud enough for you to hear. “bet I wouldn’t be stuck with them if you were talking to me.”

the worst part? he keeps looking for you after every game. immediately. like he needs to see you standing.. alive. or he’ll fall apart right there. sometimes you catch him staring, like he wants to say something—but he doesn’t. he never does.

he doesn’t understand why it hurts so much until one night, half-asleep, he hears someone mention your name and he flinches. like it’s a fresh bruise. like the idea of someone else getting close to you physically makes his blood boil.

and eventually—eventually—he breaks. cornering you after lights out, voice low and shaking in a way he’d never admit.

“you think i wanted this? i didn’t vote to stay because i don’t care about you. i voted because i knew out there you’d go back to starving, and in here i can actually—i can do something. protect you. you don’t get to act like that means nothing.”

Min su

Min su voting to leave in the game thinking he's doing the noble thing and then being utterly confused when you won’t even look at him afterwards. like he genuinely thought he was protecting you. “we leave, we survive, we go back home together, right?” it made sense in his head. the fact that you stayed crushed him a little. and now that you’re back in the game again and stonewalling him?? he’s spiraling.

he doesn’t know how to fix it so he starts doing awkward little things hoping you’ll notice—sitting closer during meals, quietly sliding extra food toward you, fumbling out a weak “are you cold?” and when you don't respond just sitting there silently for the rest of the night.

he’s so bad at confrontation it’s painful. he keeps practicing what to say under his breath and then panics every time you walk by. you’ll catch him opening his mouth to talk and then just giving up and pretending he wasn’t about to say anything.

he goes to the others like, “do you think they’re mad?” and thanos just stares at him like “bro.” semi tells him to actually go talk to you. Namgyu tells him to move on before he gets his heart broken.

Eventually he blurts out this ramble like "I thought we’d get out and be okay again and i didn’t want to watch you die i just—i thought i was doing the right thing and i know i messed up and i’m sorry i just don’t know how to fix it unless you tell me how” all in one breath.

Se-mi

se mi voting red during the vote with the same deadpan look she always has like it’s just logical. “this place is a death trap. i’m not stupid.” and you staring at her like she just stabbed you in the back. she doesn’t realize how much that choice hurt you until after the lights come on and you won’t even glance her way.

at first, she brushes it off. thinks you’re being dramatic. “they’ll get over it.”

...but you don’t.

and now she’s spiraling—quietly, of course. se mi doesn’t do outbursts, but suddenly she’s quieter than usual. snappier. watching you like a hawk from across the room and pretending she’s not.

she tries to start conversations with little sarcastic quips like “what, you mad i didn’t want to die?” but when you still don’t respond, it hits her way harder than she’ll ever admit.

she doesn’t apologize outright at first. not her style. instead she starts doing subtle things, like positioning herself between you and danger during games. low-key threatening anyone who tries to mess with you, all while pretending it’s not about you at all. “i just don’t like that guy.”

she talks to min su about it once, which is saying something because she doesn’t talk feelings.

“they’re mad at me.”

“yeah…”

“how do i fix it?”

“…say sorry?”

“…gross.”

absolutely yes—here’s a tumblr-style headcanon post for if you were dating se mi and then after both of you end up in the game, she votes red to leave and you start ignoring her. she's blunt, sharp, but definitely not heartless—and the way you ignore her after the vote? it gets to her.

at first, she brushes it off. thinks you’re being dramatic. “they’ll get over it.”

...but you don’t.

she tries to start conversations with little sarcastic quips like “what, you mad i didn’t want to die?” but when you still don’t respond, it hits her way harder than she’ll ever admit.

starts leaving her rations near your spot with no explanation. when you try to return them, she plays it off with “guess i’m not hungry.” even though she 100% is.

she talks to min su about it once, which is saying something because she doesn’t talk feelings.

“they’re mad at me.”

“yeah…”

“how do i fix it?”

“…say sorry?”

“…gross.”

eventually she corners you—not aggressively, just determined—and blurts out, “i didn’t leave because i didn’t care. i left because i care. okay? i thought if we got out we’d have a chance. not like this. not in here.”

then she crosses her arms like she’s not terrified and adds, “and i don’t regret much, but i regret hurting you. i’m not good at this… people thing. but i’m trying.”

The End

#squid game #squid game 2 #thanos #player 230 #nam gyu #player 124 #min su squid game #player 125 #simi #choi su bong #x reader

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cherryredstars · 1 year ago

Note

First off, I love you.

Second off, I love you A LOT.

Okay so I’m losing my mind over a brain vomit where younger reader’s been harboring and hiding feelings for Miguel for the sake of being appropriate and it’s starting to make her frustrated like “fuck I’m gonna get actually fucking sick and vomit” because how much she’s crushing on him is CRAZY, so reader basically goes up to Miguel like “I can’t take this anymore.” Like reject me so I can move on type of thing. “ Do me a favor, and break my nose or something. Tell me to fucking go away” or something like that. My brain is burning.

Pairing(s): Miguel O'Hara x fem!reader, John Price x civil!reader

Warnings: Fluff

A/N: For my baby, I LOVE YOUUUUUUU!!!

Edited (just for you boo)

| Miguel O'Hara

If you look at him, you will actually throw up.

Like projectile 'make yourself a laughing stock' throw up. It's just the way your body- your stomach- reacts when you see him. It gets twisted, fluttery with a fix of butterflies and disgust. It's down right disgusting, inappropriate at the least. He's almost a decade older than you, yet here you are pining after him as if you're some teenage girl. You feel physically sick when you think about it for too long: throat contracting and your stomach hurting. You aren't sure which of your delusions are the cause of such a horrendous crush, but you promise you'll strangle it when you find out. There is simply no way this could have ever worked out in your favor. It's simply impossible.

Miguel O'Hara would never go for someone like you. Young and naive, haven't even reached the appropriate age to have a mid-life crisis (but you're sure this is the closest fucking thing to it). You know this, hammer it into your thick skull every day before you have to face him. Yet, it all comes crumbling down when you lay eyes on him. It takes less than a second for you to skip after him, a stupid, lovesick look flickering across your face as you help him with whatever he needs. You simply can't stay away, even if you tried. You always fall back into his orbit, gravity pushing you towards him until you're practically glued to him.

You're sure he must find it annoying. Probably relates it to something like babysitting. It's well known Miguel doesn't like to be bothered when he's working. But there you are without fail, sitting around on his platform entertaining yourself by playing with LYLA when you aren't out saving universes. You don't miss the way his eyes flick to you every now and then with some emotion you can't quite place. But if you had to guess, it's probably something close to exasperation.

In all honesty, you're tired of it.

Tired of the false hope you delude yourself into believing after every minor interaction. Tired of trying to justify your affection for the older man. Tired of feeling a bit of resentment towards yourself. You're just... tired. He must sense it when you walk onto the platform, judging by the look he shoots you.

LYLA is muted mid-sentence as he angles his body slightly away from his monitors and towards you, watching as you plop yourself in your usual spot. He waits expectantly for your usual greeting, brows furrowing with confusion when you do nothing but play with the elastic quality of your suit. You haven't even looked at him since you got in.

"Everything alright?" His all so familiar voice asks, making your stomach ache and the urge to punch yourself stronger.

"Yeah," you respond simply, silence lapping over the two of you.

Miguel waits patiently, expecting something more. But, you don't continue. Miguel hesitates for a moment before turning back around. His eyes study the screens once more, his finger hovering over the button to unmute LYLA before you speak up again.

"Can you like... degrade me or something?"

Miguel almost chokes on his spit when he turns around, not expecting you to say...that. You're still playing with your suit and staring at the floor, face painted with frustration. You look up when he doesn't answer, brows furrowed when your eyes meet his shocked face. You quickly divert your attention to his muscular shoulder, not really having the courage to face him head-on.

"Not like the... sexy kind. More like the heart wrenching kind." You clarify, not that it's any better for Miguel.

He turns to full face you this time, arms crossed over his chest as he studies you. The request doesn't really make sense to him. Why would you want him to do that? Is it some universe-exclusive culture he isn't aware of?

"Why?" Miguel asks, trying to recall your past interactions to see if they have something to do with your strange request.

"I dunno, just thought it might make it easier?" You shrug, your eyes flicking to his again and then looking towards the ceiling.

"Make what easier, exactly?"

Miguel isn't a fan of cryptic answers, but he tries to be patient with you. He watches as your face twists, unsure how to word what you're feeling. You let out a heavy sigh eventually, actually meeting his eyes and holding his gaze for once.

"To get over you."

The words cause Miguel to freeze, his body going rigid. You groan, hiding your embarrassed face in your hands and scrubbing ferociously. This is absolutely embarrassing. You wished a random portal would just appear under you, throwing you into another universe and far away from this particular moment in time.

You're so caught up in your embarrassment that you don't realize Miguel is walking over to you until he's crouched down in front of you. He pries your hands gently from your face, giving you the softest smile you have ever seen on him. His thumbs caress your wrists absentmindedly, doing nothing to calm your raging heart. It practically explodes when he leans closer, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. Your eyes are wide and dazed as you look up at him, trying to commit the curve of his mouth to memory.

"Now, why would I want you to do that?"

_____________

| John Price

You aren't exactly sure when it started.

But the moment you realized you liked John, you've started hating yourself. It feels wrong. Almost disrespectful in a way. You aren't particularly sure why, it just does. John Price is a nice man, a good man. A man that could be easily mistaken as your father if someone didn't look close enough. The man you had happened to meet and befriended one day after he had been so kind and gentle with you.

Not the man you should be liking and forcing your feelings on.

You're someone John goes to for comfort, someone he seeks out after coming home from a battlefield. Someone that's supposed to help him distress. The idea of taking advantage of that gently placed trust, of expecting something from John just because he goes to you for help, makes you want to throw up until you're nothing but a useless husk. It's shameful, eating you up on the inside until you feel like your organs are on the verge of failure.

So your solution: Avoid Johnathan Price like the plague.

Does it hurt seeing his texts flash across your phone screen, asking you if you're free throughout the week so he can spend time with you before he deploys again? Hell fucking yes. It makes you feel guilty as hell. But you try to justify it to yourself, reassuring that it's only temporary. That everything will go back to normal once these stupid feelings leave you alone and John Price goes back to being the sweet man you grab lunch with every now and then when he's home so you can catch up.

But of course, your plans never go accordingly.

You startle on your couch when there is a firm knocking on your door, your hands rushing to pause the telly to see if it was just a hallucination. But sure enough, that same steady knocking sounds again. You get up hesitantly, brows furrowed as you try to remember if you ordered take away or something. You peak through the peep-hole, hand planted on the cool wood of the door as you squint.

The alertness in your body dies away when the familiar frame of John greets you, only to tense up again. John Price is at your door. The same John price you've been avoiding for a week. The same exact John fucking Price you're practically in love with. Your hand slides down to the knob, gulping nervously as you unlock it and yank your door open.

John is standing there with his hand raised again to knock, decked out in his military gear. His hands drop to grip the strap of his vest, his mutton chops quivering as his face lifts into his soft smile. You blink up at him, feeling the knob warm under your hand and your heart slamming against your chest. Why did he have to be so handsome, goddamnit?

You step out of the doorway, silently inviting him inside. He accepts it, stepping in and examining the area out of habit. You close the door quietly after him, turning to face him as he turns to face you.

"Missed ya, love? Been busy lately?" He asks in that comfortingly rough voice of his.

You don't trust yourself to not choke on your words, scared he'll see through your lies. Instead you nod, letting out a weak hum that he returns in a more confident note. Your eyes drop down to his military gear, a frown slipping onto your face. Is he being deployed again?

As if sensing the underlying question, John's hands let go of his military vest and he stuffs them into the pockets of his tactical pants.

"Heading out tonight, just wanted to say goodbye before I go since I didn't get to see you this time around."

You feel a stab to your chest at his words, resisting the urge to lift your hand and smooth the pain.

"John..." You start hesitantly, your mouth going dry when he hums again. "Can you tell me you hate me? Or... or that you think I'm stupid or something?"

John tilts his head in confusion, brows furrowing as his lips thin. There is a silent question in your eyes, an aura of demand wafting from him that orders you to explain further. Your hand comes to rub your arm, socked heel digging into your ankle as you debate how much to tell him.

"It's just... I like you and I don't..." You sigh in frustration, turning your head away to glare at the wall. "I don't want you to think I'm trying to take advantage of how nice you've been to me or that I expect you to reciprocate how I feel."

It's quiet for a moment before John's chuckling fills the room. Your head turns away from the wall, meeting the sparkling amusement in John's eyes as he looks at you. There is a fondness there that makes your knees feel weak, your breath getting trapped in your lungs. John takes steady, reassured steps towards you, stopping when he's centimeters away. Your heart is practically lurching in your chest as you look up at him, watching as he slowly takes off his boonie hat.

Your eyes are wide as he places it over your head, chuckling when it slips down over your face before he readjusts it. He admires the sight for a second before he leans down, his facial hair tickling your cheeks as his lips press against the corner of your mouth. Your heart officially stops, your body dangerously close to swaying as he pulls away. You're in a daze as he pinches your cheek lightly, trying to call your attention away from the sparks lingering across your skin.

"We'll take about this when I get back, silly girl." He rumbles, his heavy paw landing on the top of his hat before he slips past you, closing and locking the door behind him as he disappears out of your flat. You're left in a daze as your shaky hands reach up and grasp the rim of his hat, the smell of him instantly invading your senses.

And when John reaches base and the lads pester him about where his usual hat is, he just shakes his head and replies that he left it at home for safe keeping.

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averydayss · 1 year ago

Text

Every Summertime𓇼

>>contents: in which you try to make Jay jealous by persuading his bestfriend, Sunghoon

>>warnings: fluff, angst

>>now playing: Every Summertime - NIKI

You and Jay are inseparable, the both of you always had been together since the earliest of moments. This started when both of your moms are close friends, which means you two often meet during their hangout.

Jay's mom has a vacation house that they use every summer, and every year your invited to stay during the summer break. And of course you did, so y/n and jay would stay in the vacation house together

At the age of 10, you started to realize that you had developed some feelings for jay. The reason being obvious, Jay was anything a girl could ever wish for. Handsome, kind, smart, sporty, rich, he is a heartthrob in school

Jay didn't liked you that way though, in his eyes you were a little sister to him since he was an only child. Although both did had a situationship for a couple of months, nothing happened though

That didn't really bother you though, after all you both still spent time almost everyday together.

Jay had his fair share of crushes, you did too. But they never really went as far as being more than that, until at the age of 16 Jay had his first real girlfriend, Yujin.

Yujin and Jay met at one of his basketball games and eventually their relationship bloomed into something romantic

"y/n i have some good news for you" Jay said excitedly. "Really? What is it?" Y/n asked curiously.

"Me and Yujin are officially dating" Jay said

Y/ns heart shattered at the new couple. At first Jay and y/n still was close and Jay even told y/n a lot of stories and things he liked about yujin, which you didn't really want to hear but you did anyway for Jay

One day, you were with Danielle. You both were shopping for clothes and bags, and you suddenly saw Yujin kissing a stranger who doesn't look like Jay at all

Isn't that Yujin?" asked Winter. "Yes i think so"

"You should take a picture so you have proof to tell Jay" said winter. You listened to her and took a picture at the sight

After you were done shopping, you went straight to Jay's house. "Jay, i need to tell you something" said y/n while pulling out her phone and showing the picture. "Your lying, its edited. Yujin would never do that, just be happy for me y/n" said Jay

As time went on though, you noticed that Jay was starting to act quite differently. When you would tag along ur mom to go to his house, he would usually invite you to his room to watch movies and play games. But now he would lock himself in his room until you left.

You wanted to confront him at school, but he would always be with yujin. Yujin always had this evil smirk everytime she sees you. You can tell she didn't want you to be close with Jay anymore

Finally, the chance came when both you and Jay's mom decided to have a small gathering at your place, and Jay was forced to tag along. You took this opertunity to approach him and try to strike up a conversation

"Hey we haven't talked much lately, are you good?" Y/n said. "I'm fine" Jay said shortly, not even looking at you but his phone.

"it's going to be summer break soon you know, are you excited to go to your vacation house together?" You emphasized the last word

"Of course, but this year Yujin asked to come along with us. Is that good with you? You can bring someone too if you want" Jay asked. You were shocked, you wanted to refuse. But after all this is Jay's vacation house. "Why not" you said and excused yourself to find someone else to talk to

By the end of the day when the party is over you rushed to your room to call your friends about it. You told them the problem

"Really? That's so inconsiderate of him" said Chaewon on the phone while painting her nails

"If i were you i wouldn't let that slide" Said Danielle. "I know right!, you should bring some man to make him jealous or smth" said Hanni. "You think i should do that?" Y/n asked. "Yeah, if only you 3 would be in the vacation house then you would obviously be the 3rd wheeler" said Danielle

At first you were against the idea, but the more you think about it the more you started to feel like it would work. But a problem is that who would you pick?

You'd pick Soobin, but he already has a girlfriend. You simply can't do that to someones man. A bright idea came into danielles mind though, Sunghoon. He was a perfect candidate

To start off, he was Jay's best friend, he was also single. But you two never really talked to eachother, sure Jay introduced you both a couple of times but you weren't close to him. Still you wanted to try

Y/n: Hey sunghoon! can we meet up? I want to talk to you about something xx

Sunghoon: Sure, why not

Y/n: Lets meet tomorrow at EnCafe at 2pm?

Sunghoon: of course, see you there

You were surprised on how quickly the man agreed, but this was a good thing,

The next day came by, and when you entered the cafe you found Sunghoon. "Hey, how have you been?" Sunghoon had always liked of y/n since they first met. But he never approached y/n since she was always with Jay

"Hey sunghoon, I've been good what about you?" Y/n asked. "Ive been good, what is it that you wanted to talk about?" Asked Sunghoon

"Well Jay has a girlfriend and you know how me and him usually go to his vacation house every summer? Well he is bringing his girlfriend too this year, i was wondering if you'd come along with me this year so i don't feel like a third wheeler?" Y/n asked with pleadingly

"Sure, are you sure Jay is good with this though?" Sunghoon asked excitedly. "He told me i can bring someone so im sure he is good with you invited, besides you two are close" said y/n. "Well then see you soon" Sunghoon asked while trying to contain his smile wider. And with that you found someone

And with that, summer break came in a flash. Now you were currently packing your suitcase to stay at Jay's vacation house for the summer. You were glad that sunghoon came along so you would still have fun after all.

Sunghoons contact name appeared on your phone, he texted you that he would be picking you up with his new car. You smiled at the message and answered.

When the two of you arrived at the vacation house, Jay was cooking beef at the kitchen while Yujin was busy taking photos to post on her socials.

You and Sunghoon went to unpack. The vacation has about 4 bedrooms, perfect for all 4 of you. Jay texted you that he planned a pool party at his vacation house tonight and told you to join.

When u appeared outside of your room, you saw that Yujin's friends are also staying at the vacation house. Great. You were about to ask Jay about it, of course you were. Jay didn't say anything prior to this

Though the first thing you saw was Jay and Yujin making out by the pool. Gross, you thought. You didn't want to admit it but a part did break in you.

At the same time, Sunghoon saw the commotion and saw your helpless face and decided to approach you

"the others are having a bbq grill thingy, care to join" asked Sunghoon

"No im good, ill just go back to my room"

"U like him right?" Asked Sunghoon suspiciously. Y/n was shocked but tried to keep a straight face. "What makes you think that?" Asked y/n

"Its obvious, you always give Jay love eyes everytime you see him" shrugged sunghoon. "I really dont think its any of your concern" said y/n

"Are you kidding me? Ofcouse it is. First you invited me to the stupid vacation house and now your completely distracted with Jay and his GIRLFRIEND" said Sunghoon angrily

"I didn't mean it that way, i just have a lot on my mind right now" said y/n while massaging her temple

"of course you don't" said Sunghoon sarcastically while storming off

The next day you both avoided eachother, you wanted to apologize but you didn't know how to

"So, you and Sunghoon? That's certainly a surprise" asked Jay while leaning on to the fridge after taking his sprite. "Yeah, i guess so"

"Sunghoon has been kinda off these past few days, did anything happen?" Asked Jay. "We just got in a little fight, nothing serious" said y/n

"do you like him?" Asked Jay. "Why does it matter? I don't think its ur business" asked y/n rudely

"Calm down, i was just curious. Why are you so angry?" Said jay. "Of course i am, i wasn't informed that your girlfriend and her minions will be staying at the vacation house" said y/n angrily

"Princess you know i would have informed you, i was just busy with school" you winced at the old nickname. "Sure you are, im gonna find sunghoon" said y/n

Y/n walked through the hallways and approached sunghoon who was busy reading a book. Sunghoon saw y/n at the door frame and raised one of his eyebrow.

"I wanted to apologize for the things i said a few days ago, im sorry I didn't mean it that way" y/n apologized. "You know I've always liked you, but you were to focused on a guy that already had a girlfriend

"I know, i can't help it that i love him Sunghoon" said y/n bitterly. "You know i can help you with that right? Just be with me and ill make your time worth" said Sunghoon

"Sunghoon, i really don't want to make you a rebound" said y/n. "Just give me a month to prove your time worth it" said Sunghoon pleadingly

"Its fine, you don't have too" said y/n trying to hide her smile. Sunghoon smiled and kissed her temple

A few months went by and Sunghoon kept his promise, he was the best boyfriend you could ever asked for. Caring, sweet, and much more. You couldn't have asked for anything more.

During that one month you weren't as close to Jay than before, he tried to contact you but you would always make excuses

Then one day Jay asked to meet at a cafe, you wanted to refuse but he kept begging until you said yes

"Its been a while" Jay said while sipping his coffee. "What do you want to talk about Jay?" Asked y/n

"Me and Yujin broke up, i found out her real intentions of dating me. Im sorry" said Jay. "You didn't do anything wrong, you don't have to apologize" said y/n while fidgeting her fingers

"I was wondering if you want to be my partner for prom? I've known you for so long and if im gonna be honest you looked prettier than you've ever been this past months

"Thanks Jay, but i already said yes to sunghoon's invitation to prom" said y/n

"I don't get it? I thought you liked me? Why are you now close to sunghoon?"

"Sunghoon's nice, incase you didn't know we are dating" said y/n and stood up from her seat and left the cafe

Since that day y/n blocked Jay and lived a happy life with Sunghoon

💳: divider: @snoozebin Other pictures are from pinterest, credits to all the owners

A/N: Send an ask to be moots

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yeosangs-horizon · 11 months ago

Text

Silhouette (Wooyoung x neighbor!Reader)

Genre: Neighbors -> Lovers | Fluff & Smut Word Count: 4.2k Member: Wooyoung | Group: Ateez Warnings: smut, fem!reader Author's Note: Oops I haven't posted an Ateez fic in ages, hi!! I've had this one cookin in the drafts for a year and never felt like it was good enough to post till now, I hope you enjoy. I've had intense Ateez brain rot recently again. I've also been enjoying writing longer fics with more plot/lore so expect more of that :^)

Your neighbor was quite peculiar, always turning up his music just before your bedtime and going out wearing a black face mask and a hat that shielded his identity. You had never confronted him before, the closest you got was thumping on the wall that connected your room to his when he was playing his music too loud and he seemed to get the hint. You were getting ready to take the trash out when you heard the music playing again, it was the third day in a row and you had an early day at work the next day.

Grumbling to yourself, you recounted the tasks you had to complete by the end of the work day, knowing that you had to finish your portion of editing a music video for the entertainment company that you worked with. You opened the front door, trash in hand as you strolled by your boisterous neighbor’s apartment.

You glanced in, curious as to what he was doing with music blasting at such late hours. You saw a tall silhouette moving to the rhythm in sharp and fluid motions. You stood there for perhaps a bit too long, gazing at the mesmerizing motions of your neighbor.

Noticing that he turned his head and the music had stopped, it snapped you out of your trance as you saw the figure come up to the window that you were staring at. You saw a trace of his red locks before you dipped and ran down to the dumpster on the first floor, feeling embarrassed that you were seen. The thought of you confronting him to turn his music down went out the door after the events that night.

The next couple nights were quiet, you were accustomed to the muffled rock songs that were playing by this point that you found the silence a bit lonely. You had forgotten your phone charger in your car so you forced yourself to grab your keys and make a quick trip to the parking lot to grab your charger.

A gust of wind found itself blowing past your face as you huddled to yourself, but not before turning your head to your neighbor’s window and seeing the silhouettes again, this time of two figures standing in the middle of the living room. You turned your gaze away before making your way down to the parking lot as you heard the door to your neighbor’s flat open. You searched around in your car and snatched your charger before walking back up the stairs.

“Good practice today San, get back safe!” you heard the voice call out.

“Thanks Woo, get some rest!” the other man’s voice rung out. You briefly made eye contact with the man with a duffel bag in hand as you made your way up the stairs.

You found yourself gazing at your neighbor, the one with red locks, the silhouette you were staring at a couple nights ago.

“Oh hey there! You’re my next door neighbor right? Sorry if my music has been bothering you, I’m Wooyoung!” he beamed, holding his hand out. You were taken aback by his forwardness.

“Don’t worry about it. You always manage to turn it down by the time I go to sleep for some reason, so I didn’t bother confronting you,” you spoke out, telling him your name whilst taking his hand in a firm shake.

“Sorry for uh, staring at you through the window the other night,” you admitted.

“Ah that was you? I got worried it was some stalker that got a hold of my address…”

“Does that happen often?” you inquired, wondering more about your mysterious neighbor. Perhaps that would be why he always went out shielding his identity.

“You could say so, with my profession,” he vaguely hinted.

“You’re a dancer or choreographer or something of the sort? You looked… really good from that night,” you blurted out, realizing you may have been a little too forward you took a step back. He chuckled and shrugged.

“You could say that. Sorry if I haven’t been too welcoming, I know I moved here a month ago but never got a chance to introduce myself.”

You felt a bit bad for misjudging a nice character just because he blasted music in the evenings.

“No worries! I also dance a bit in my spare time but I’m nowhere near as good as you,” you continued. A gust of wind in that moment made you shiver a bit, wanting to get inside, but also wanting to continue to talk to your neighbor.

“I’d love to see sometime. Ah also let me get your number, it’s always good to have that connection with the people you live closest with!” Wooyoung beamed.

With shaky hands you typed in your number in his phone. “Have a good night Wooyoung!” you called out as you slipped back inside your place.

Not only was your neighbor mysterious, he was also very attractive and looked somewhat familiar, but you couldn’t place your tongue on it. Wanting to let lose a bit, you grabbed your speakers and picked your favourite song to dance to, ‘Snapping’ by Chung Ha.

You had memorized the choreo and the conversation you just had with Wooyoung had reminded you that you wanted to practice on your dances again as some of your girlfriends had mentioned that they wanted to get a dance cover group together. You got into the groove of things, moving your body to the beat as you heard a notification on your phone.

‘Snapping, good song choice, it’s Wooyoung btw, not some weird stalker lol.’

You laughed to yourself for a second before turning the volume down, not wanting it to be your turn to be the asshole of a neighbor.

It was a stressful day at work as the deadline to the music video you were tasked with working on was coming to a close. After you would have somewhat of a break and then be put on another project with the cycle repeating itself over and over again. Your thoughts trailed back to your neighbor, as you stared at the music video you were working on.

You were lucky enough to work at a well known entertainment company, being able to stare at the talented idols that your company manages was a highlight to your day. Your inspiration and love for dancing also came from them.

You tilted your head, idol… was Wooyoung a part of a group or an upcoming soloist? You kept up with older groups so you had no idea about the newer generation of idols. You shook the thought of your head, perhaps you could ask him later on down the line. Although you didn’t have any direct line of communication with the idols your company manages, you could imagine how invasive fans and even strangers could get about their profession.

It had been about a month or so since your run in with Wooyoung. The two of you had been texting occasionally and making small talk when you saw him in the hallways, needless to say you grew quite fond of his presence within that time. You found yourself anticipating when the next time you’d see hoping to get any excuse to talk to him when you’d step outside.

You found that other than dancing, you had other common interests with him such as tending to plants or cooking and experimenting with recipes. You’d sometimes get a whiff of his cooking when you’d crack open the window for some fresh air in the morning.

Most of your conversations were initiated by him texting you, ‘hey did you hear that noise?’ or ‘was that you hitting the wall?’ He was silly to say the least and you were a little surprised to see him standing in front of your door when you came home from work that day.

“I texted you but you didn’t respond, but I wanted to see if you wanted some cupcakes. It was one of my member-- I mean coworker’s birthdays at my company and we had a lot of extras!” He asked cheerfully, holding out a plate of sweets in front of him.

“That’s very sweet of you Wooyoung, sure!” You replied, exhausted from a day’s worth of editing and wanting a snack anyway.

“Wait, if you’re not busy, you could come in?” he suggested.

Why not? You shrugged and turned towards him, “I’m down, anything to get my mind off of this deadline at work.” You slipped your shoes off, following him into his couch and coffee table.

The layout was the same as yours, but the place looked minimalistic and very modest. You turned your head and gazed at the speakers that were the culprit of the noise that you had once complained about.

“Oh yeah, my speakers have been busted so that’s why it’s probably been quiet for you,” he chuckled.

“Damn, sorry about your speakers,” you apologetically replied.

“It’s cool, I’ve been using my phone for music but don’t worry, more speakers are coming in soon,” he grinned. You took a bite of the cupcake Wooyoung had offered you and smiled into the sweetness.

“Thanks for these by the way,” you mumbled through your bite. He rested his hand on his cheek, staring at you sweetly.

“I saw you dancing the other night too, you were pretty good,” he mused. You almost choked on the cupcake.

“I didn’t watch on purpose, you didn’t close your curtains but I’d know that choreo from anywhere, it was Blackpink’s Kill This Love right?”

You nodded, feeling a bit flustered from being exposed like that. “Yeah um, some of my friends and I wanted to get a cover group together sometime so I was just practicing,” you sheepishly replied.

“Y’know the guy you walked passed that night that we started talking? He’s my main dance buddy, we practice and hype each other up all the time. If you need anybody at a hand’s reach, I’m here,” he grinned.

He was a professional and he was offering you a chance to learn from him?

“Maybe I’ll take you up on that offer sometime,” you replied back, letting your gaze meet his.

This was the first time you had the chance to stare at his face without it being awkward. His dimples are adorable, you thought, letting yourself admire his features. A sudden hand on your face pulled you out from your trance as you felt Wooyoung’s finger slide across the corner of your lip.

“Sorry you had frosting there,” he mumbled, removing his hand from your cheek, the warmth still lingering there.

You gazed down, feeling warmth arise to your cheeks and smiled to yourself. “Thanks, uh, one of my friends really wanted me to learn the choreo to a song that I thought was really difficult, if you wanted to help me with it. I haven’t started but the dance practice looked intimidating,” you spoke out.

You felt his gaze on you as he spoke, “Of course, which song is it?”

“Hala Hala by Ateez. The music video looked cool but the choreo seemed intimidating so I’ve been putting it off. I wish I could incorporate the editing style in that music video in my work, but my skills are nothing compared to those editors,” you sighed

You trailed your eyes to Wooyoung after your train of thought stops to see him staring at you with his jaw a bit agape. “Yeah sure, of course. I um, know that dance really well don’t worry!” He exclaimed, trying to hide his shock.

“Does Sunday work for you? I can’t do tomorrow since I got a work thing,” he gestured vaguely. You nodded.

“I am indebted to you Wooyoung, I should study the choreo a bit and let you know the more difficult parts to make your life a little easier,” you laughed. You felt him tense up a bit across from you.

“You haven’t studied the choreo at all before?” he asked.

“Not much, I was only shown the performance music video like once from my friend,” you shrugged.

“Thanks for having me over by the way, I gotta do some chores back next door but I’ll be seeing you Sunday!” you smiled as you got up from your seat. Wooyoung seemed a bit tense as he sent you off through the doorway.

“‘Course, see you Sunday…” He was a bit nervous if you would make the connection that he was with Ateez. Any sensible person would put two and two together with the amount of information he slipped out to you already and the fact that you knew his face.

He hoped that you wouldn’t react badly or sabotage him in anyway, he had developed some sort of feelings for you as your love of music and dance had captivated his attention and you were just as adventurous as him.

As night rolled around, you were finished with cleaning your apartment and were sat at your desktop ready to relax and study the choreo for Hala Hala as you said you would for Wooyoung. You had heard of Ateez here and there, but you didn’t know any of the members much less their names and what they looked like.

All you knew was that your friend was obsessed with the song and to do a cover of this song with her dance group was her dream. You clicked on the music video as you saw the members in their outfits popping up one by one.

You took in their accessories and appearance as they flashed by on screen, suddenly a familiar face popping on screen. You blinked twice and had to rewind. Wooyoung, your neighbor? No way… you thought, as you kept on staring at the face on screen.

All this time you had thought that he was just a backup dancer for a group or something of the sort, although him being an idol ran through your mind as well. You decided you’d ask him about it sometime later as you started to note down parts of the choreography.

Sunday had rolled around quickly with no texts from Wooyoung. You had hoped that he was still available and it wasn’t like him to not send you texts. You had been accustomed to texting him replies of the random messages he sends. You hadn’t heard from him even as you were practicing with the music a little louder than usual the night before. You shrugged it off as you stepped outside to knock next door.

“Wooyoung?” you called out, after knocking a couple times. It took a minute or so, but you were about to head back into your place as the door opened.

“Hey, sorry about that I was um… cleaning,” he smiled. In truth, he knew you were at the door but was a bit nervous to see you again knowing his identity might be spoiled. He decided he had to come clean.

He let out a sigh as he spoke, “Listen I…”

“Can I ask--” the two of you spoke at once.

He let out a stifled laugh as you walked into his flat. “I wanted to come clean um…” he started. His nervous energy confirmed what you were thinking about.

“I know Woo, don’t worry. Everything’s still the same between us if you want it to be, I mean I work for an entertainment company so I’m aware of the stress that idols go through. I genuinely didn’t know you were part of a group until recently,” you stammered.

He let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks for not being crazy about things, I was afraid you’d resent me or leak my address or something,” he mumbled.

“You guys are humans too, plus I just wanted to add you looked so cool in Hala Hala and I may have been listening to some of your other songs,” you gushed.

“Makes sense as to why you’d blast music and practice at that time, you work so hard. Don’t worry I haven’t been stalking you online either, I wanna get to know you genuinely,” you smiled.

“In that case, let me teach you to master the choreo to my song then,” he beamed. You gazed at the openness of his living room, furniture pushed back to the back of his apartment, taking in the new speakers as well.

“They finally arrived huh? I can be back to listening to your music at ungodly hours of the night,” you jokingly nudged him.

“Maybe I’ll turn it up just for you,” he grinned, turning the speakers on and putting his song on.

You had shown him a couple parts that you had picked up the other night, but you fumbled during the chorus and ended up tripping on yourself and falling onto his hardwood floor face first. “Yeah, the chorus was definitely what was intimidating,” you groaned.

“Shit you okay?” Wooyoung rushed to your side and held out his hand. You nodded as you slipped your hand in his, using his weight to hoist yourself back up.

“Let me show you how we did it,” he offered, stepping next to you.

“So when we approach the ground, it’s a slow descent and keep your weight balanced in the middle to keep yourself from falling,” he gestured, showing you the move again. “And when you pop back up, do it lightly or else you’ll have a lot of neck pain, take it from me,” he chuckled.

You grinned at his enthusiasm for you to learn the choreography, taking in his words and repeating the motions that he eagerly showed you. “Was that it?” you asked, gazing around for him. You felt his hands wrap themselves around your arm to readjust their position at the ending pose.

“There…” he mumbled behind you. “Now that’s perfect,” he smiled, letting you relax your position. “You dance really well y’know? I’m glad I got to see it up close this time,” he grinned.

You felt flustered at his compliments, coming from someone who was way more trained than you were. “You’re too sweet Woo,” you breathed out, feeling a bit tired and sweaty from practice at this point.

“I’ll get you some water, we can take a break for now,” he gestured.

You nodded, catching your breath and letting yourself slump on his couch that was now pushed back against the wall. A minute later he plopped down beside you with a glass of water. You gulped down the hydration as you noticed his gaze on you again.

You put the glass down and met his gaze, he was smiling at you as he always did when the two of you had a rare moment like this, you felt the flutter in your stomach again as you heard his soft spoken voice.

“You’re really gorgeous when you dance.”

You blinked twice, sure that you were daydreaming.

“Wait what?”

“I’m serious, you have good rhythm and flow, and not to mention… you’re so pretty,” he confessed.

You felt flustered as he let his gaze linger on you. You weren’t sure when the distance between the two of you got closer but you knew when it closed as he pressed his lips on yours. Truth was, he had been pining for you for awhile and after realizing he could trust you and that his identity was safe with you, he let his feelings take over.

You let yourself melt into his kiss and soon his touch that enveloped you in a hug. His lips were soft against yours and he didn’t hesitate to deepen the kiss when your mouth parted open. He put his weight against you and pretty soon, you were laying down as he was on top of you, taking in your taste as his digits intertwined with yours.

“Mm Woo,” you mumbled against his kiss. He pulled back, a bit afraid that he had gone too far to fast.

“The curtains, people can see,” you breathed out, eyes still hooded.

“Shit we don’t want that happening again,” he cursed before he closed the curtains, leaving the room a bit dim and nice for the atmosphere that was to come.

“You’re okay with this yeah?” he mumbled, wanting more of you. You nodded,

“Yes Woo, please…” you exhaled. He brushed his lips against your cheek before planting a kiss there.

“Thank god, I’ve wanted you so bad. You’re so hot…” he whispered to you. His breathiness went straight to your core as you squirmed in your arousal.

“Guess your dancing just does something to me,” he teased before pressing his lips back onto yours.

He let himself grind his hips on you, relieving you of the ache that you had been missing from your core as you felt his length hardening against his cargo pants. You tilted your head back in pleasure as he started to trail his kisses from your jaw down to your collarbone, still grinding his hardness against your arousal.

“I want to… feel you,” you managed to breath out.

You managed to shimmy your pants off with ease as he kicked off his cargo pants. You also got your shirt over your head to toss to the side, even with his touch and kisses around your neck. Wooyoung trailed his hand down to your core, feeling the arousal soaking through your panties.

“So excited… and all for me hm?” he teased, pressing his finger onto your aching core.

“Yes Woo,” you moaned out.

You felt his cock twitch in the confines of his boxers. He quickly stripped off the remainder of his shirt and undergarments. You gazed at his defined muscles, droplets glistening as a reminder of your dance practice now turned into an intimate waltz with one another. You gazed down to see the length of his hardness, now dripping with precum as a result from his arousal. You did your best to kick off your panties as your own arousal ached for him.

“So pretty…” he mumbled, taking in your form.

He leaned down to cup his mouth over your breast as he let his cock slide around your folds before finally slipping himself inside you with ease. You let out a stifled whimper as he stretched out your hole. It had been awhile since you had any action but that didn’t mean that you didn’t have fun by yourself once in awhile, and recently it had been to the thought of Wooyoung. He was attractive nonetheless but you never thought you’d be in this position.

“Fuck love,, I won’t last if you’re this tight,” he breathed out. Your core clenched around him as an affect of his words to you.

You let your hands trace his defined figure, taking in his beauty and his red locks that fell inches away from your face. You felt him move and slowly start to thrust in you. He planted kisses on your breasts, even taking the time to suck a love mark onto one.

You let out a breathy moan as he continued to thrust in and out of you, slowly increasing his pace. You instinctively wrapped your legs around his torso, wanting to feel more of him. You let out a sharp hiss of pleasure as you felt him bottoming out inside of you.

“Woo… mm, you feel so good…” you moaned. He quickened his pace as your core clenched around him.

“God you’re so hot like this,” he breathed out, his eyes lustful as he gazed upon your naked form below him. You let your hips take reign as you bucked up to meet his pace.

“Woo I’m so… close,” you whimpered.

“Finish for me,” he whispered in a deeper voice.

That was enough to send you over the edge as your core spasmed around his hardness. You felt him twitch inside of you before he let out a high pitched moan and spilled into you, rocking himself into you to chase the high.

“Shit, I um, didn’t mean to do it inside of you,” he stammered, feeling shameful of his actions.

“Wait Woo I should have said something earlier but I’m protected, on the pill so don’t worry. I should have still said something earlier though!”

You reassured him, running your fingers through his locks as you gazed lovingly at him. He let out a sigh of relief as he slowly slipped out of you. “Some dance practice we had today right?” You chuckled.

“One that leaves me to clean up my couch,” he laughed along with you.

You let yourself relax into his touch as he placed an arm around you, pressing a kiss onto your temple. “What does this make us?” you asked.

“Anything you want it to be, but I should have asked you out on a date before this…”

“Well I mean our actual dance practice could have been our date,” you giggled at his realization.

“Let me take you out on a real one then. I like you a lot!”

152 notes · View notes

97keanu · 1 year ago

Text

Digital Angel

Premise: You're a hacker living in 1999 Chicago. The bustling city has been lonely, save for a few friends you've made at the local goth club. You fuel your lifestyle by hacking important classified information for criminals, but lately your usual clients haven't been coming around. Turns out, some hacker named "Neo" has been stealing your clients. You decide to get to the bottom of this by hacking him back...

Tags: slowburn, enemies to friends to lovers, loser!neo, perv!neo, virgin!neo, prematrix au, hacker!reader, goth!reader, bdsm elements, age gap 23/35, eventual smut, stalking, cyber stalking, masturbation, neo is a naughty panty sniffer, he's literally such a pervvy stalker in this idk what to say, themes of loneliness and longing, neo and reader are each others mirrors, two sides of the same coin, fated to be together, red string of fate, last two romantics in the city, yadda yadda.

Words: 12.4k

A/N: This is the revised edition of Digital Angels first 3 chapters. Fully edited, added some new content/context, and Chapter 4 will be out tomorrow! (If you wished to be tagged in it, please add yourself to my taglist, and select Neo!) Thank you to everyone who has enjoyed this fic, I hope to do it justice in the coming chapters.

Read chapter 4 here!

꒰˵ˊplaylistˋ˵꒱

You sit in your bedroom, basking in your computer’s green glow. It’s been a hot summer, the night air doing little to cool Chicago down, and the window and fan set up you have running do little to help. You should be sleeping but something has been bothering you lately, keeping you up well past midnight.

Your typical clients, who come to you for illegal information that you’ve hacked from the government, haven’t been contacting you. In fact, you’re getting more small-time stuff than ever. Fake ID requests, fake official reports for god knows what, and the last straw was today, when you were asked if you could illegally pirate a DVD for some teen.

“Really? Back to burned DVDS?” You had thought to yourself. It was almost laughable if it wasn’t for the fact that without the bigger time jobs your rent wasn’t getting paid. And there was no way you were going to get a real corporate job like the rest of the early 20 somethings your age.

You had asked your closest client over IM earlier tonight. And what he gave back to you, was a name.

[Neo]

The screen read back to you, as if taunting you with the existence of him. Such a little name for the big pain in your ass he’s been.

Well…if this “Neo” guy was taking all your clientele, then you were going to look into him. You worked too hard for your hacker prestige to be brought back down to pirating softcore porn for any local sleaze ball. No…you were going to find this guy and confront him.

So, that’s why you’ve been working tirelessly these past four hours, hunting down any trace of “Neo” online. You haven’t found much yet, but you can feel yourself getting closer. The more false leads you eliminate, the more the real one will stick out when you see it. You rub your eyes until you see inky little stars and after you pull up your long black hair into a ponytail so that it’s off your neck in this heat. That’s one thing you hated about summer the most. The heat. It left you little black options to wear, and that made most of your wardrobe unbearable. Right now, you were stuck with a black tank top, foregoing wearing pants, just to survive.

You take a moment to gaze out your small apartment window, to get away from the glow of the computers for a second. The Chicago skyline greets you as you open up the window enough to straddle a leg out of it. The night air helps, and a cool breeze blows on your sweaty skin. You need this. Just a moment to yourself before you get back to it. You pull out a cigarette and light up the end with a faint red glow.

As you gaze out, you see other little apartments in the area. Your apartment is high enough up that you have a great view of all the dazzling lights of the city. One perk of the shithole you live in.

You sigh out a puff of smoke, and think of all the tiny white flecks of windows. Some of the closer ones you can see their insides better. You can see from here a kitchen window of an older couple making dinner, someone’s living room with a blue gash of flickering images passing by. Your eye catches on an apartment somewhat like your own, a green glow with their own computers, the owner sleeping softly at their desk. You wonder where all their lives will go when you look away. Do they cease to exist because your gaze does not fall upon them…?

No, you logically know it doesn’t work like that, but it sure does feel like it. You don’t think you’ve known a true friend that you’ve kept up with in years. Just you and your computers…

You finish your cigarette break, and find your way back inside your bedroom, popping Wish by The Cure into your walkman, ready to plug back in and search for the fucker stealing all your jobs.

It’s a few hours still till you find it, but there it is, a sloppy job this ‘Neo’ must have done at some point. He left behind some evidence and here you are finding it like a fingerprint at a crime scene. His IP address was left behind. Now it’s time to have some fun…

You begin to run your own home grown line of code. It's not intricate, a bit unstable, but it will do. You get access to a lot of his computer files, but most importantly the IM app he uses to message. You’re also surprised to find a photo of him as you're searching around. Or what you assume is his face. It looks like a photo taken for a work I.D. An all white background, center and staring at the camera with slightly dead eyes lead you to believe that.

You can’t help it, but when you see him, you think he looks sort of cute. A part of you curdles at the thought of finding the enemy cute, but it's the truth. He has big brown puppy dog eyes which you’ve always been a sucker for, and surprisingly soft features despite sporting a set of high cheekbones and a sharp jawline. His black hair is also a plus, it looks somewhat neat for the photo, but he doesn’t look like the type of man who is too appearance focused. Lucky him, to have such genes to get away with it, you suppose. There’s just something about his eyes that really makes your heartbeat quicken, something about the touch of loneliness there, even though he has the kind of face that was made to be loved. You catch yourself blushing and force your mind to stay on task.

You get back to working with your program. If this works correctly it would give you an in to talk to him. You can use this program to help you hack right into Neo’s friend list and send him an IM. You grab a coke from your mini fridge and get to work, the cool, bubbly liquid waking you up enough to finish the task.

Finally, after what seems like ages, you’re in. You send Neo a message, leaving your typical dorky screen name on. It's not your real name anyways so it doesn’t matter.

[NightShade]: I hear you’ve been stealing all my clients, Neo…

You think for a moment, wondering what exactly you should say first, but this seems good as anything. You’re worried because he was so hard to find, he might just ignore or block you. Doesn’t hurt to try, so you press send and lean back in your chair, somewhat proud of the night you’ve had.

As you wait, you begin to think the other hacker is likely asleep. You sigh, sleep coming to claim your eyes just as well, so you decide to get up and take a shower. It’ll help with how hot it is too, you determine with a nod of self assurance as you hop up out of your chair.

You are attending to a bit of self care in the cool shower, when you hear a ping! You don’t think you’ve ever scrambled out of there so fast.

You attempt not to slip on the titles as you rush out, and find yourself padding with wet hair to the computer chair in nothing but a black towel. You feel too nervous to look, what if he doesn’t want to talk to you? You did come on strong with your first message, accusing him of stealing your clients and all…

[Neo]: Who are you? How did you message me?

The computer reads as you sit, and contemplate how to respond. It is a strange predicament in general, you suppose, but you’re not backing down now. You pause and consider how to reply, but a part of your heart beats with happiness that he responded at all.

[NightShade]: You’re not the only hacker in town you know, and word is that most of my return customers have been coming to you lately.

You sit back and bite your lip, you know you’re confronting him and all, but really, what is the end goal…is it just to say you tried? Is it to win him over? Beg him to stay out of your side of the business…you’re not sure. You feel this strange pull to him regardless.

[Neo]: So, in retaliation you’ve taken it upon yourself to contact me and complain?

He’s right, maybe this whole thing is childish. Maybe you’re childish, despite being 23 and trying to make it as a big time hacker like the rest of them. You can’t help but respond as the late night anxiety whittles on…

[NightShade]: Well, if I could find you within the night, who’s to say the government couldn’t? Why don’t we create something here that helps us both…

You’re not even sure what you’re getting at, but you don’t want him to log off. You watch, waiting for him to type again…

[Neo]: And what would you suggest?

“Shit…” You mumble to yourself and find your hand is nervously rubbing at your thin eyebrow hair. You’ve been trying to quit that, but nervous ticks are hard to kick.

“Alright, we gotta be smart here. If we propose something stupid he’s going to realize I’m just a young, dumb girl who knows a bit of hacking. Nothing special…” You often find yourself out loud, there’s no one better to talk to at your disposal so might as well.

You consider your options. Should you ask him to divide up turf? Divide up clients? You highly doubt that would impress or please him. No, but maybe you could offer something else…

You begin working on the computer, and checking Neo’s connection. He was terribly hard to find for those few hours but honestly, it wouldn’t take the government long to find him if you could. Not to mention, as you look, he has all sorts of back doors to controlling his computer. You browse a few files and find yourself nodding and smirking as you see a folder full of goth girl porn. Seems he has type…you aren’t sure if it helps or hurts that you dress similar to the cyber girls in his computer.

Ultimately, he might be good at getting the info for the clients, but he is shoddy at best at keeping his own ass covered. You get back to the IM window and type…

[NightShade]: I know you must obviously be good at getting info for clients, or else they wouldn’t leave me to come to you. However, you don’t keep yourself safe enough out here. Like I said, I found you in a few hours. And I can clearly see into your files you have hidden right now, such as some extremely saucy pictures of girls in black leather. Imagine what other information I could find with some time. I can help you fix that…If you’re willing.

You hit send and feel a chill run down your back despite the heat. Will he be receptive? You have no idea. Maybe you shouldn’t have mentioned finding his porn folder so easily.

Quite a few minutes passed before you heard a response, and you were starting to believe he was surely considering blocking you. That sweet sound of your computer pinging pulls you out of your thoughts.

[Neo]: So…you found my weakness…and you propose to help. What’s in it for you?

“Yes!” You think, feeling like pumping the air. “He didn’t say no!”

[NightShade]: We stop splitting clients, we work on the hacks together and I keep your ass from ending up being tracked down again. Divide the profits accordingly.

This time, you get no response. In fact, you sit at your computer for another hour before dragging your tired body to your tiny, disheveled bed. You leave your computer on, awaiting the signature ping just in case. As you lie in bed, you turn so you can see outside the large window beside your dark enclave of a mattress that holds you. As you gaze out at the city once more, you can’t help but feel drawn to that other apartment. Its green glow blinks every so often, as if the previously sleeping stranger was stirring before the window. Pacing, perhaps like your mind does as you drift off.

———

Thomas Anderson, better known as 'Neo’ to the underbelly of the cyber world, is half drooling on his desk when he hears that persistent ping! of his computer. Groggy and tired he opens his eyes, the green glow of his computer the only source of light in his tiny dark room. As his eyes adjust, he lets his pale hands rub sleep from his eyes just to solidify that he’s awoken. A light layer of sweat glistens from the computer light, and tries to wipe some of that too, not that it helps.

He groans a little as he pulls up the nagging chat window that’s blinking for attention. Probably some client that wants this or that, ASAP as always with these people.

His sharp brows furrow as he sees a name he doesn’t recognize.

“NightShade?” He talks aloud to himself, only his ears around to hear anyways in his little apartment.

He is surprised this person was able to get onto his friend list, he thought he ran a pretty tight ship over here, but maybe the extra shifts at his day job were making him sloppy. He finds himself sitting in a bit of disbelief before responding to their claim of “client stealing” as they put it.

“I mean, who does this person think they are?” He scoffs into the dark, humid night air. His sweaty fingers tap along a response questioning who the identity of this 'NightShade’ character is. He’s surprised when they respond almost immediately, claiming to be a fellow hacker.

“Sure…” He rolls his eyes to no one as he takes the situation in. “Probably some petty kid mad that their clients found a real hacker for their needs.”

He reaches over and pulls a cigarette out of a discarded box on his messy desk. He pops it loosely into his mouth, mostly for the comfort of having it there at the moment. He’s not ready to light up, just yet.

The other hacker responds, supposedly finding Neo’s IP and computer just within a few hours. He’ll double that for their sake, not really believing his rig is THAT easily infiltrated. But they do make a good point…if he is seeing this message at all, who’s to say who else could get in?

Neo is intrigued to say the least, he wipes his sweaty palms on his dark sweatpants and responds, asking what the other party has in mind then.

“This should be interesting…” His voice is husky with sleep and an overall tiredness that seems to permeate his entirety.

The other hacker takes a moment to respond, so Neo rolls his desk chair to the nearby window. He cracks it and lights his cigarette finally, looking out to the cityscape.

He watches a plane lazily draw across the sky like a star blinking in and out of existence, and he wonders how despite his business of being a hacker having been so perfectly solitary he has found himself seemingly intrigued by this supposed other hacker. He never really complained that he had essentially no social life. He was destined to be like this, the way he saw it. No one at work took much interest in him, they saw him as a nerdy lackey programmer and was all. Not someone to take out for drinks after work. Not someone to strike up conversation with in the break room. It was like they knew he was different, and stayed away because of it. He had little luck with making friends in his hacking ‘community’, if you could even call it that. Neo was pretty certain he would die alone, and that feeling had been present for so long, it had started to comfort him. Until tonight, that is.

His eyes drift across the city apartments, and he doesn’t notice his pause on another green glowing apartment across the way at first. He lets a long drag of smoke billow out the window as he focuses on it more.

From here he can see a tiny form of a girl, and he actually blushes as he realizes they’re in nothing but a towel. He hasn’t seen a real life woman in such a vulnerable state in a while. He takes another drag as he sighs out the smoke to the thought that he’s been more than a while…

He doesn’t take his eyes away though, he knows he’s safe looking at this distance anyways, so he watches as the young woman is seemingly typing on her own computer. It's not uncommon as a pass time anymore, more and more people are starting to use this new 'internet’ thing, after all.

Still, he wonders for a moment how she feels. Is she as lonely as he is in his tiny room, typing, typing away all night long. Does she like the people she types to? Neo rarely does.

He starts to imagine what kind of life a pretty girl like her must have. Probably messaging her abundance of friends for what they’re going to do this weekend. Likely in university, staying in a shitty apartment until she graduates and moves on to bigger and better things. Neo watches as the towel slips further as she’s more invested in her screen, unknowingly to her that her every move is being watched. Her soft shoulders and collarbones stick out the most to him, the subtle way they move when she types, her dripping black hair falling on them in delicate swirls.

The excitement of seeing this unknowing stranger in such a vulnerable state, a state he’s sure no one else gets to see, draws Neo in.

He watches her until he hears another ping, tearing his eyes away and stubbing out the cigarette on the window sill. Neo has to practically tear his eyes away from her to see his computer screen.

He rotates back to his computer to see the other hacker's message, and laughs out loud at the fact that they seemingly found his porn folder. It's less unnerving than the other party probably thinks, it's likely they believe Neo to be had in this scenario. In a strange turn of events, he’s finding himself feeling a rush over the whole thing, with a twinge of nerves since they do after all, seem to be able to see into his whole system here.

It's a strange feeling for him, he hasn’t felt so naked in such a way for so long. Hypocritic, even after his look into his neighbors apartment. It's as if someone has walked into his room while he was undressing, but instead of fear, he feels a rush of endorphins. It's almost voyeuristic, and he has to laugh at that thought too.

“Alright, so they can see into my computer,” he speaks, as his mind begins to race, considering all the possibilities here. He might as well see what they have in mind to do about this, so he responds.

He is utterly surprised at their proposal for teamwork, however. Somehow this makes him recoil. The thought of working with another in such a way makes him nervous. He has been alone in this for as long as he can remember…

He bites his lip as he considers how much they’ve seen of him so far. It's only fair that he can take a look as well…

Neo disregards the other hackers message for now and immediately goes to work. Since they’ve been messaging him and all, it's pretty easy for him to work his way into finding their computer. The hard part is getting in. It actually takes him much longer than he expects and when he does get in, it's the tip of the iceberg. In fact, he’s utterly surprised that all he can find at first is normie information like what movies this guy watches and some music tastes. He ends up down the rabbit hole for a few hours before he sees something that freezes him.

A profile picture for an online goth community. He can only assume it's the other hacker, and what he knows now is that NightShade is a woman, an exceptionally attractive woman at that.

He can’t explain it, but seeing her image has struck him. Something about her is absolutely engrossing. He finds himself leaning closer to the screen, until he can pick out the pixels beginning to form. His heart skips a beat or two as he realizes he’s enamored…

He pulls back, looks away.

“Get a hold of yourself, it's just some girl, you could see another on the street whenever you want.” He speaks in a whisper as he leaves his chair and begins to pace his tiny room.

Why? Why is knowing she’s a beautiful woman, who’s exactly his type, complicating this? Is he really that touch starved that he’s like some highschool boy after seeing his crush in the hallway. No, he’s a 35 year old man here, he shouldn’t be having these strange feelings.

And with this surge of emotion out of him plus his penance for working alone, he can’t seem to find a way of a team effort working out between them. He starts a few times from pacing to go back to his desk and reply that he is uninterested, but he can’t seem to finish the task.

Neo finds himself sitting on this thought all night and more, your face left in a browser on his computer…

———

It’s been a week since you messaged Neo, and after the first day or so, your heart felt heavy. You know it really isn’t that deep, but the rejection took a hit on you. You started agreeing to CD burns and mixtapes on the fourth day, you feel so down and strapped for cash. You actively seek out reasons to leave your room because it beats sitting around waiting for a reply that won’t come, as well as all the lack of work you’ve been having.

Tonight, you drag home some Chinese take out, walking up the steps of your apartment building as if your legs are made of sludge. By the time you throw yourself into your apartment, you can barely muster the energy to eat. You store most of the food away for tomorrow, but keep the crab rangoons, since those don’t heat up very well, after all.

You set up at your desk, working on getting ahold of some test answers for some highschooler when it happens. The noise startles you enough that the crab rangoon hanging out of your mouth hits your desk. You quickly change tabs and can’t even stop yourself from looking immediately.

[Neo]: I’m in. But I think we should meet in person to go over this.

You have no idea if you should fake that you’ve seen it, or reply straight away. You know that he might think you were waiting on him this whole time if you reply too fast, so you force yourself to finish eating while you sit and stare at the green glow of the screen with a fervor to reply.

Just when you think you can’t finish the last bite fast enough, you thrust your greasy fingers to the keys.

[NightShade]: Alright, but I say when and where.

You’re so much cooler through the computer, he has no idea that you’re over here gushing because you know he’s cute and likes to hack too. It’s ridiculous, you find yourself ridiculing inwards.

[Neo]: Deal, your choice.

You think for a moment, in disbelief that he really means it. You decide to point him to the local goth club you frequent, Club Hel. You are a member there, so you have a private booth you two can talk in. You let him know where to go and who to ask for. You decide, fuck it, tomorrow can’t come soon enough so might as well do it then. You go over the details and the two of you are seemingly on the same page. You stop replying this time first to get the upper hand, even though you’re pretty sure the concept is childish in nature.

It’s been a long day so you plop on a Deftones tee and hop into bed. Strangely enough, your dreams are filled with soft brown eyes and computer code…

———

Neo hates to admit it, but he left your picture up on his computer for the rest of the night. At first, your ghostly pixelated image made him feel strange, to say the least. Accompanying the fact that you were essentially proposing to watch over him, to make sure he didn't leave any back doors open when hacking, Neo began to sleep, images of you as his guardian angel finding their way into his fleeting thoughts of restless sleep.

When he awoke late the next day, he was sweating once again. The hot Chicago summer was droning on, the early season when it's just deciding to heat up was long gone and replaced with humid, sweltering days. Neo could hardly stand it, and opted for a shower, his body sticking to his clothes as he took them off and tossed them on the bathroom floor.

As the cool water hit his body, he began to think of you again. He imagined your pretty little face, you had to be younger than him, that much was obvious. Your dark hair, pitch black as your clothes and makeup. Under the stream of the shower head, Neo found himself imagining you in ways he would feel guilty about afterwards.

He imagines you, in the shower with him, your hands gently cascading down his body, coming to rest right before his hard cock. You look up at him, your makeup starting to fall from the water, and your lipstick leaving rings on his cock when you start sucking him off. Neo practically groans out from the thought, his hand keeping pace on his own cock while he imagines that it's your mouth inside, soft, wet, and warm. He can only imagine what it would be like for you to encompass his cock with your perfect, cute mouth. Fuck. He can barely keep himself from cumming right now, the idea is so sexy.

What really gets him over the edge is imagining taking your hair in his hands and gripping it enough that you cry out, and when you do he's pumping his cock into your mouth harder than before. His muscles tense in the shower, even just the thought of being so aggressive with you igniting every muscle in his body. You, who thinks you had the upper hand after finding his porn stash, who was bold enough to hack into his computer without his knowledge. He continues to think of you choking on his cock, maybe even pulling you off for air, and you begging for more while your goth makeup is dripping down your cheeks. Oh God…He's going to cum.

Neo finishes in his shower, his husky groans escaping finally, and his back finding the cool tile of the shower wall for support.

"Fuck…" He whispers out to the lonely shower walls, a bit of clarity coming to him as he realizes with embarrassment just how lonely he has been.

That along with this trance you've put him in leave him feeling totally guilty. He's just some 30 year old loser who has a kink for chicks in black makeup, he really should be able to control himself. Meeting you shouldn't have any ulterior motives of lust, but he can't hardly stop himself.

He gets out of the shower and tries to wipe off shame with a fluffy white towel, frustrated that his body doesn't feel any less hot than before, but it's not the summer heat that's getting to him anymore. No, it's you. And he has to be able to contain himself tonight when he meets you at the…what was it again? Some goth club from what he researched last night, no surprise there.

God, Neo's afraid he won't be able to help himself from popping a boner when he finally sees you in person. If your profile picture has this much of a hold on him, then he's worried what will happen when he really gets to meet you. Maybe he'll get lucky, and it'll turn out you're actually a total catfish, and some other lonely loser like him. At least then he can laugh in your face and leave. Go back to his typical solitary existence.

A part of him aches at the thought all the while. If it's not what you actually look like, the fact that he just jerked off to you is all the more shameful. And, as much as he doesn't wish to admit, he would be highly disappointed.

Neo finishes up redressing, opening the window to his apartment to let some air in. He looks back out and sees the same little apartment he saw the last intriguing girl in. She's in there now, and from the looks of it, he thinks she's…trying on different clothes? He can barely see what she's wearing from here, but he can definitely tell when her body is bare of anything, becoming all one color besides a splash of dark hair. Just the idea of making out this unknowing neighbor's curves and ass has Neo hard again. He really is a pervert, huh?

He can hardly tear his eyes away, and the only reason he isn't throwing his left hand into his pants again is he knows that he likely won't be able to finish after doing it again so soon. He's almost jealous that he didn't get to sit here, staring out his window at the unsuspecting woman, freely looking at her in such a vulnerable state, pleasuring himself. Instead, he was imagining a girl who might not even really exist all by himself in the shower. He has a secret hope that maybe some other time, he'll catch the siren across the way undressing yet again.

For now, he turns from the window and begins to psyche himself up for meeting you tonight.

——

It's late, but it's the time you asked to see Neo. Everything works better under the mask of night. You can imagine more. A fairytale can become real under the night sky if told to the right person. You hope you actually get to work with this Neo guy. You know that your work has been so little lately, so this would really help you out. But you also know that you've dreamed of Neo all this morning, the image of his striking brown eyes drifting through your mind. The worst part was that some of those dreams were less than innocent in nature. The most vivid is seeing his eyes look up at you from between your thighs…

No, you don't need to think of that right now. He's late and could be escorted to your booth any minute. You currently sit in the red velvet lined booth, large dark curtains enclosing it, making it a safe zone for a meeting. You spent a chunk of the afternoon, worrying about what you would wear, dressing and undressing for well over an hour. You finally decided on a sleeveless dress, its top corseted, embellished with fancy black and purple lace. You chose a short black mini skirt to go along with it, and of course one of your favorite pairs of platform chunky heels. You fit in well with the rest of the clubgoers of Club Hel. You wonder how Neo will feel, seeing you are so much like his dirty little hidden porn folder. That shouldn't matter, this should be a business deal, but it does matter. Somehow, you know in your heart, and your occasionally aching pussy, that you want Neo to want you. It would be so satisfying to know that this nerdy hacker is thirsting after you. Plus it would be less embarrassing that you want him…

Just as you think he's not coming, black manicured nails playing with some drink named 'bloody' this or ‘batty’ that, the heavy curtain is pulled back. The familiar face of one of the usual workers dips in, checking that the person beside him is who you want at your table.

It's him.

You're breath catches, and you're surprised. As soon as you see him it feels as if something inside you is pulled to his very energy. He has on a long, black trench coat. Black clothes underneath that you can't see very well. His hair looks darker, actually, it's gelled back you notice. He isn't someone who looks as goth as the rest of the patrons here, but he doesn't stand out either. You're really taken back by how sexy he is, not like the computer dork you thought he would turn out to be.

From the look on his face, he's surprised to see you too. You wonder if he can feel the magnetic connection, it's like every move he makes is on a wire that you can feel the trembles reverberating through. You can see his dark eyes looking over your body, he even pauses on your breasts, which are accentuated by the low cut and tight corset. You can feel heat rising to you cheeks even though you curse yourself internally for it. You open your glossy. black lipsticked mouth to speak, but he beats you to it.

"NightShade, I presume?" His voice is more masculine than you thought it would be.

You're stunned for a second by him, and realize how childish it makes you seem that you're just staring at him. You also realize you never told him your real name, so you begin to blabber it out, before he stops you.

"We better stick to our code names. As you know, I go by Neo." He says and sits across from you at the booth.

You feel stupid for blurting half of your real name out like that, and know he's right. It's dangerous to even be meeting in person like this. A tiny voice in your head is disappointed you couldn't be known by him as your true self. Not just an alter ego…

"You're right, I'm sorry. NightShade it is." You say with a nervous nod. Neo is so hard to read.

Besides the initial surprise when he first walked in, he now seems as expressionless as a statue. Adding all the more allure to your already dirty mind about him.

"Well, it's good to finally meet you." Neo responds, and for some reason, you get the oddest feeling from the way his eyes look at you.

It's as if he's trying to communicate something wordlessly straight to your soul. You can't tell if it's want that fuels it, or something else, but from the way he looked over your body earlier, you wonder if he liked what he saw.

"You as well. Have you thought any more about what I had proposed?" You gently lift your cocktail to your lips, and softly sip the blood red liquid, your lipstick leaving an imprint on your straw. You wonder what your kisses would look like trailing up Neo's pale neck…

"Yes, I have. And as much as it pains me to say it," Neo says with a chuckle, the way he talks and his age advantage over you seems like he's in much more control here than you are.

Somehow the idea of him dominating this conversation turns you on, you glance at his large hands on the table, and wonder what those hands would look like on your body, especially around your pretty little throat. You're distracted from what he's saying, he says something stronger in tone and you snap back to those endless seas of black that are his eyes right now.

"I think it would be advantageous for us to work together. It's clearly not safe for me to continue to work alone if I can't keep my own ass covered. I'd like it if you could help with that." Despite Neo's words clearly asking for your help, you didn't feel as if you were the one with any power here. Somehow, you feel like the fly who's wandered into the spider's web. The question now is how far will you dip your little legs into it, dear fly?

"I…would very much like that." You say, your voice feeling small, hoping you're heard over the loud club music downstairs. "I would like to split the profits however…"

You add the last part, taking some great confidence that you only seem to find when you're talking online. Neo laughs a little and you worry he is unimpressed by you worrying about money.

"That will be no issue, I don't mind paying you for your…services…" When he says that last word, those dark eyes trail over your body once more, and you can't help but wonder the implications of what he's saying. "I think we could really start to corner this part of town for black market information…"

Something about Neo's attitude puts a chill up your spine, and a heat between your thighs. You can't help yourself, the thought of going back to your apartment after this, alone once more, is too much for you to bear. You want to be acquainted with Neo, the little voice in your head knows you've tossed the thought of something more around a few times in just this conversation. There's something dangerous about Neo, you can't tell what it is about him, but it makes you want to uncover it, find out what his code is hiding, so to say.

"I have to agree. How do you want to go about this? We can work mainly from our own stations, or…?" You begin, trying to drive your thoughts to stay on topic, work out the kinks of this budding relationship between you two.

"I think that will happen for some of the time, but I'm still going to need to give you physical copies of some of the files, and I don't trust much besides meeting up to exchange those hand to hand." Neo seems to have thought over this enough, he's also very cautious. His reserved, quiet, and dark demeanor is so hard for you to understand. If he was as cool as he seems right now, shouldn't he be able to handle himself? It's interesting to you that he needs help from someone ten years younger like you.

"That…makes sense." You nod along. "Maybe a weekly coffee date is in store…?" You say nonchalantly, not realizing you've used the word 'date'. Neo's eyes light up with something, was that a hint of desperation? It's as if you've looked past this cool exterior of a mask he has on and glimpsed into the want that he's hiding.

So it's not just you who feels this pull?

"A date…?" Neo's voice has lost the suaveness from before, now husky with need. You wonder briefly when the last time he had a date was based on this. Is he really, secretly the computer nerd you envisioned him to be? His cold and calculated behavior is slipping.

"Why…?" Your voice comes out slyly, you can't help yourself. "Would you like that?"

You tease him, your brattiness coming out, your dark makeup giving you a more sinister glance his way, you always felt more confident wearing it.

"N-No…" He starts, clearing his throat and glancing away.

There's the dork inside of him.

"I mean, we should definitely have meetings, yes. I just don't want the wrong idea…"

He says the last sentence softly, almost as if he doesn't want you to hear, or perhaps mention it. But you're suddenly in a mood, the little fly who likes to fight back.

"The wrong idea about what?" You lean over the table with a grin, your breasts pressing out of your top as you do so. Of course, Neo's eyes flash there and he is obviously kicking himself for it. "Has something transpired within you that I don't know about, Neo?"

You can't believe how bold you're being, but the way he's now clearly squirming from your questions makes you feel more in control at the moment.

"Nothing, but an interest in…" Neo drags his eyes away from your chest and continues. "In working together."

You laugh a little, but back off.

"Alright, well. Why don't you inform me on what you're working on now?" You smile, eager to begin working with this fascinating man. You feel more alive than you have in a long time, your suffocating bedroom being much of your world lately. This is exciting, and the pull you feel for Neo is undeniable. You wonder if he feels the same. Maybe you could come up with something mutually beneficial, besides working together.

"Well, currently I have some local gang members who want info from rivals who have been using an online chatroom to communicate." Neo seems relieved to get back to work talk, the stoic, quiet side of him settling back in.

"That's not very smart of the rival gang…" You mention, but nod for him to continue.

"It's not, no. But I think they have a resident coder because the chatrooms are locked up pretty tight. I wonder if any of them are secretly government…but who knows." Neo is being very kind to share this information, he must trust you enough right now to let you in, as well as coming to a commitment to your partnership. You almost bite your lip with glee over that revelation, but stop yourself.

"Interesting, I should probably work alongside you to keep you covered then. If any of them are undercovers, we don't want them noticing us in the process." Neo seems impressed by your words.

"Exactly. You're uh, pretty good at this for your age." He comments, acknowledging your age differences with caution.

"Yeah, I've been doing this for a while, and was taught by some pretty good hackers…" You shrug, as if it's no big deal. You want to be mature for him, even though 23 is plenty old, you feel quite immature half the time, hence your bratty behavior. Neo seems a bit skeptical.

"Sure…well. I hope you can do a good job of watching over me while I do the rest of the hacking. I've never had a…I don't know what to call it, an assistant?" He says trying to find the right word for you.

"Hey! I am not going to be your assistant!" You reject the notion, a bit childish of you despite your previous worry of maturity.

"Alright, alright…" Neo chuckles, raising those big hands in defeat. "What should I say instead? Colleague? Partner? Guardian Angel who looks after me?"

He jokes about the last one, but something inside you kind of likes the ring of that. You laugh along with him, you two are getting comfortable, and you notice he's leaned over the table towards you as well.

"We'll work on that one…" You say, looking into his eyes, his eyes searching yours just the same. The flash of the idea of closing the foot of space between you two and trying those soft looking lips floats by in your mind. You can just imagine what he would look like when you're done, his lips smudged with your lipstick. You can't help but want to mark your territory.

The two of you continue to discuss the details, both of you surprising the other with how much tech knowledge you both possess. Somehow, you feel as if he just gets you, it's so strange. You have felt so lonely this summer, it feels as if a fire has been ignited in you, bringing you back to life, your body buzzing. You don't know if it's the liquor you've had, which hasn't been that much really, but you feel like you could get addicted to Neo's energy. He's just so interesting.

When he asks to walk you home, you don't even think twice.

———

The night has brought rain while the two of you were in Club Hel, and Neo's mind is racing. He's absolutely obsessed with you. He couldn't take his eyes off you all night, even though he tried to act aloof and maybe even use his maturity to seem as if he has control over the situation. But the truth is, you could have him wrapped around your finger in no time.

Neo's aware of this, but the lonely loser inside him is so desperate for this connection. He feels as if he needs you. If he loses you, scares you off, that would crush him at this point. If he thought he was in trouble just from seeing your picture, coming and seeing your real life form has absolutely blown his mind. He has no idea how he scored talking to someone as sexy as you, but knows he can't screw up and show you how much of a nerdy perv he actually is. He's so glad the table hid how hard he was for you, and when you two stand up so he can show you home, he keeps his trench coat closed tight.

He quickly helps you into a cab, the rain just beginning, but by the time you're both inside the hot backseat of the cab, you're drenched. God, he can't believe how gorgeous you look with your black hair soaking wet, he watches the city lights glint off your now slippery breasts. He really can't believe you wore something so promiscuous to your first meeting with him.

He wonders if you want him as much as he wants you, but he almost can't let himself believe it. He wouldn't be able to live from another let down like that. He is pretty old to still be a virgin, one of his biggest secrets, and the fact that he's barely talked to girls, let alone never really had a girlfriend doesn't help. He's always felt like such a freak, and the stuff he's into, hobbies like hacking, kinks, or otherwise, have never been something women have been interested in.

But you?

Here you are, this gothic beauty who has the same passion as him. It's too good to be true. He can barely speak to you. He's so wrapped up in his own thoughts and nervous in the cab.

He wishes this were a real date, that taking you home meant he got to follow behind you. His thoughts tumble into going into your bedroom with you, pinning you to the bed, and him finally having his way with you. He's been picturing it all night. He wants you to moan out his name, tell him how much you want him, and take as much of his cock as physically possible.

God, he can't even hardly look at you right now his thoughts are so dirty.

"She probably thinks I'm such a huge freak I can't believe I haven't run her off yet." He finds himself thinking.

Neo wishes he could find a balance between this desperate horniess he feels for you, and being a normal man who has very good intentions with you. He can't help it, he's already lost to the thought of you tied up and willing. He can just picture his hands moving all over your body, tightening the rope where need be. He bets you even want the rope to be black.

"We're almost here…" Your angelic voice whispers to him. He's snapped out of his daydream, and he realizes the two of you are super close to his apartment. For a moment he worries he gave the driver the wrong address, but no, there you are, stepping out and leading him to your apartment.

Neo lets you take his hand, and run through the rain towards your apartment building. It's as if an electrical current is running between where you two meet, hands touching skin to skin, a need so bad that Neo wonders if he can control himself. The urge to pull you to him and smash his lips against yours, uncaring from the rain, is strong enough he has to stop himself. When you two finally get inside the building, you're shivering, your little bit of clothing soaked and not offering much heat.

"Here…" Neo says, taking his trench coat off, the leather allowing most of the water to glide off, the inside dry and warm.

"Oh! Thank you…" Your soft voice says, and Neo feels so good to be able to help you like this. When you turn to go up the stairs, Neo adjusts his cock in his pants, now that the trench coat is gone, he doesn't want you to see his hardness. He hopes you don't notice as he places it against his waistband.

The two of you walk up the stairs to your apartment, and Neo is almost angry with you that he can see up your skirt, spotting red lacy panties on your ample ass. Fuck. He has to keep it together, but it's so hard to keep his brain from fogging over with lustful thoughts of you. You two haven't even discussed anything romantic, he can't be acting like this, besides how much younger you are, you probably aren't interested, and, and…

Neo doesn't even notice you two are at your apartment before you're opening the door and turning to him. He feels entirely caught off guard by your big, innocent eyes looking up at him.

"Well, would you like to come in and dry off? I have a spare umbrella you can use when you go…?" The way you're speaking and looking at him right now, he could just grab you and push you inside, taking as much of your flesh in his mouth as possible. Besides the fact, that there's no fucking way you really invited him in.

"I-Yeah…I would like that." Neo finds his voice. It would be nice, his hair is soaking wet, now dark and in his face, the gel no longer keeping it as slicked back as he would like. He doesn't like feeling so disheveled, so out of control.

"Good, come in. You can sit on the couch…" You say to him, pointing out the couch and bouncing off to the bathroom to get a towel.

Neo sits as told, and takes in your apartment. It's small, has more rooms than his however, and the decor matches your style, a bit toned down in the living room and kitchen, but as he leans over he realizes can see into your bedroom from the couch.

He leans a bit more, and realizes he can see something else too. His cock aches when he notices that he's looking into the bathroom, the door isn't shut fully and he can see your form moving about in there. It looks like you are taking care of yourself first, stripping down from the skimpy goth outfit you had on.

Neo clutches the side of the couch, his breath stuck in his chest as he sees those lacey red panties, and now gets a glimpse of the matching bra as well. He wonders if you wore those on purpose for tonight, or if that's how you always dress.

Soon, he knows he absolutely should look away as your back is now bare, your bra slipping down your shoulders, from this angle not revealing anything quite yet. Neo can't help himself, his hand is pressed to his cock over his pants, just tiny bits of well placed pressure exciting him even more. He knows he can't look, this isn't right, he isn't supposed to see this, but god, he could cum in his pants right now if he keeps staring.

You continue to undress, your bare ass now facing Neo, your panties on the floor of the bathroom, you kick them towards a pile of clothes in the corner. Neo is totally entranced by you, rubbing on himself more and more, getting off on the fact that he shouldn't be looking, the forbidden intrigue becoming an obsession for him. He's so fucked.

He jumps when you begin to turn, and scrambles when you come out of the bathroom and into your bedroom naked. He moves back to his original position on the couch like his life depends on it, his heart beating hard. He tries to adjust to seem nonchalant when you eventually come back out, this time sporting a Bauhaus band T-shirt that's way too big for you, along with a pair of black sporty shorts. He isn't sure if this is hotter than seeing you naked to be honest, your hair is still wet, and your make up has been washed off. He feels as if he should only see this version of you if you only allowed him to be that intimate with you.

You toss him a towel and point into the bedroom.

"The bathrooms in there if you need to use it." You say with a smile, coming to sit on the couch yourself now. Neo nods and quickly stands, trying to hide his hot and hard cock. This might be his chance to help himself out, though the guilt of that is already starting as he thinks it.

He goes to the bathroom, and makes sure the door is shut. He can't let you see this. His pants are down before he can do anything else. His cock is freed, and the night air sticks to it. Fuck, he's so hard for you.

Neo is stroking himself off in your tiny little bathroom, trying to cover his mouth from heavy breathing. He's so scared you'll hear him or he'll take too much time and be suspicious. Honestly the nerves are making it hard to get off, then he sees something laying on the floor and groans.

He snatches your discarded red panties, not even questioning the morals of pressing them against his face and getting a smell of you. God, you smell so fucking sweet and musky, Neo could scream. He imagines fucking you like no other right now. He wants you against this bathroom counter, looking at your own reflection, watching yourself desperately need his cock.

He thinks about tying your hands behind your back, and pressing your face into the counter as he gets forceful with your tiny body. He's so much bigger than you by comparison, height alone gives him all the advantage he needs over keeping you in place and fuckable. He would easily be able to get what he wants from you.

The smell of your pussy on your panties is making his head spin, he keeps using his hand, harder and harder, getting to climax thinking about shooting off a load inside of you. He aims for your sink as he finishes, his disgusting actions leaving a mess there. Once again, fuck…

Neo has to just lean against the wall for a moment to catch his breath. This is the second time he's jerked off to thinking of you. God, he's such a loser. He briefly wonders if he made a mistake, if he goes back out there and by some miracle you actually brought him up here to fuck him, did he just both metaphorically and physically blow it? No, there's no way.

Neo shamefully cleans up after himself. He even makes sure to rinse his hands and the sink with soap, it wouldn't be fair to leave any evidence.

As he finishes up, and actually starts to dry himself off like he was supposed to, he sees the panties where he had set them next to the sink. He doesn't have time to think twice, he has been in here too long, so he swipes them and puts them into his pants pocket as deep as they can go. He hopes you don't notice them missing, my god, does he hope. He composes himself, then finds the confidence to stride back out there and look at you after what he's done.

You're lounging on the couch, flipping through channels on a tiny CRTV. You stop on a late night black and white horror movie. As Neo comes back out, he thinks he sees Bella Lugosi coming to seduce his female victim, and he can't help but chuckle.

"I didn't know you liked the classics." Neo says, your attention turning to him. If he just focuses on teasing you, then maybe he won't have to think about what he just did.

"Of course, Dracula is the best." You say with a smirk, as if he's the dumb one for suggesting anything else. "He's just so powerful and mysterious…"

"Powerful and mysterious, huh?" Neo responds, still standing by the couch, unsure if he's invited to join you.

"Why don't you come sit and see? It's still raining down pretty hard, maybe you should stay until it lets up…?" Neo can't believe his luck, but now he is really worried he came too soon in the bathroom. He slowly sits down next to you, hoping there isn’t some sign of what he just did in the bathroom stuck to him that he didn’t catch before.

"Alright, I'll stay for a bit," Neo tries to sound like this isn't his wildest dream right now.

The two of you continue to watch the movie as the rain gets worse outside. And somewhere between that and now, Neo realizes he may have just had that date with you anyways. His typically heavy heart feels like skyrocketing when at some point you move and lay your head into his shoulder.

The small movement shouldn't have him this flustered, but it does. The rain makes whatever perfume you're wearing smell so much better. It smells powdery with vanilla, musk, and fresh cotton mixing with the earthy scent of rain. Neo takes a deep inhale, nose tilted over your pitch black hair, and hopes you don't notice.

Eventually, the night wanes on, the storm still gently raging and the movie playing out. Somewhere amongst all of that, Neo finds his eyelids getting heavier. His body relaxes as you snuggle closer, and he can tell you are close to sleeping too. He feels like he absolutely should not fall asleep, this is so strange to him, he has never felt this sort of intimacy before. But he somehow feels so safe right now to do so, and it's not like he really has the willpower to deny you.

He lets you snuggle half into his lap, and finds himself falling into a peaceful, dreamless sleep…

———

A hot breeze flows in through your apartment window, and for a moment you wonder if this heatwave will ever break. August is droning on, not ready just yet to give out a final death rattle. Instead, it grips Chicago tightly in a humid warmth that has been suffocating, clouds threatening to rain but never delivering. You lie almost naked, save for a pair of black panties, amongst your bat themed bedding, a plushie here and there, staring up at the ceiling fan and wishing it brought you any salvation in your time of need.

It doesn't help that you are also thinking about Neo. More specifically, the last time you really saw each other. You thought maybe something more than an alliance between two hackers could have been budding when he fell asleep on your couch, but in the morning you awoke to only the scattered couch pillows on the floor.

He didn't even contact you for a week. Eventually, you heard that awaited notification noise, but it was disappointing to say the least. Neo had messaged you, but it was simply to ask if you could help with making sure he was good to hack into this or that, you really hardly cared for what the details were. The anger and hurt inside of you from being asked to be his digital guardian angel after how he treated you could rival the August heat outside.

Still, you complied. You had thought about telling him to go fuck himself, that you no longer wished to interact ever again, but what good would that do? It's not like either of you ever agreed to something more than a work based relationship. And what makes it worse is that deep down, you know how lonely the world has begun to feel. Even now, as you roll over in sweat drenched sheets, looking out to the skyline that stretches ever farther and farther, you know that despite all the inhabitants of this city, you have never felt more alone.

That fact alone was enough for you to do what Neo had asked, wanting to still be in contact with someone who may understand. Although he had ran from you, hidden away and obviously too frightened to ask to meet up again, you think the reason for all of that may be that Neo is lonely too. You have no evidence for this of course, but you could almost sense it from him. It’s something that burns low, almost burning out, inside both of you, seemed to speak without words when you met. And now all you can do is try to get your mind off it.

Tired of the thoughts running through your head, you huff, sitting up quickly and disgruntled with how much you've been lying about lately. You make the great task of getting out of bed and find yourself before your floor length mirror in your bedroom. What you see makes you frown.

Your hair is a mess, after having not washed it for a few days, your makeup is still on from last night. The black eye shadow and mascara have moved, now cascading down your cheeks in smudges. You look at your usually well kept nails, now riddled with chipped black nail polish from you don't remember when. You can't let it get to you like this any longer. You head for the shower, hoping to both cool off the summer heat, and the heat that this Neo situation has gotten you into.

———

The small fan at Neo's desk moves side to shuttering side, attempting in vain to keep the small room and it's only occupant cooled. Neo sits at his desk, head in one hand, eyes fatigued and tired, trying to fix the script for one of his latest codes.

He's been throwing himself into his work to forget about you. He hates that he got so worked up over you, that he was such a loser to even steal a pair of your panties upon his first time at your apartment. There was no way you deserved someone like him. Not to mention, that you should probably find someone around your own age, not someone like Neo, who at best is a shut-in who can't socialize, and at worst, well, to keep the depression at bay he might as well not say.

To keep this relationship between the two of you professional, he has spent the last two weeks since you two met attempting only to contact you for jobs. It was what was right, the older, more adult thing to do, instead of pursuing a young 20-something goth girl like you because he has a kink for black lipstick.

Still, he had a hard time keeping himself from you. He can hardly even admit it to himself, but he's been hacking your webcam. He starts by telling himself that he just needs to check up on you, especially when you leave his messages on read for hours, although he knows he deserves that after how he disappeared. It's innocent really, he will tell himself, that you need to be checked up on, that it's only to turn on the camera for a second to make sure nothing happened. It is, after all, dangerous work you two do.

Then, it somehow turns to leaving the camera on, letting your image sit beside him on one of the many computers at his desk. It's nice having you there, so close to your computer. You're probably working on the codes he sends you, or perhaps messaging friends, he hears a voice somewhere deep inside tell him to check out those messages as well, but he hasn't brought himself to that quite yet. No, you're simply a video on his screen, almost like watching a movie, or having someone in a cafe sitting next to him, quietly working on their own thing.

He even finds that he likes the music you play, he can't help but be interested to find out more about you in this way. He wishes he could ask you which Siouxie and The Banshee's songs are your favorite off the album, or if you had to choose, would you pick The Smiths or The Cure. It's these little questions about you that plague his mind all day when he watches you. Sure, he could simply ask you these things, but that would be both suspicious as well as violating the self appointed rule of making this a work only relationship.

The worst of it is when he can see you getting ready to leave. You still have a life outside of this. You go to Club Hel, you meet with countless other creatures of the night, and you enjoy yourself. Neo almost hates to see you putting on your goth garb for the day because that means you must be going somewhere, somewhere away from the green light of the screen where he can see you.

Neo sighs out, the heat and these thoughts getting to his head. His fist curls in his short black hair for a moment before he stands from his desk and stalks away quickly. He told himself he wouldn't watch you today, he would lay off that sort of thing, but the need to know is eating at him, and you make it so easy for him, having nothing to block his attempts to hack your webcam. If he were the adult he seems to think he is, then he would simply stop, or better yet tell you to up your cyber security.

But no, deep down, Neo knows. He knows he's weak for you. He knows he's looked through all the photos you've taken of yourself on your computer to post to this or that goth forum. He's looking at them, entranced by how bold you are, wearing only a black lacy bra in some photos with a Vivienne Westwood orb hanging between your breasts. In other's you show off your big platform Demonia's, and Neo wishes he could have you here, stepping on him with those chunky boots and telling him how pathetic he is that he has stooped so low as to cyber stalk you.

As his mind continues down its own rabbit hole with you in tow, he finds himself sitting back down at his desk. He's been a good boy today, not watching you at all yet, and it's late. So he deserves a little taste, right? Just a peek to make sure you're okay, to see what you're up to.

Before any sort of morality can plague him, his long, thin fingers are typing away, pausing only briefly to take a sip of black coffee. He keeps the drink on hand always, his desk littered with a few spare mugs, the insides of which are dry and have brown stains from where coffee used to inhabit. He continues to work around your security, until finally the screen blazes to life, showing the image of your room.

He doesn't see you in there, and for a moment a twinge of panic sets in. Are you out somewhere? You hardly left the house. Where would you even be? Probably somewhere old losers like him don't frequent, like the club. His mind burned at the idea that you could, very possibly, be out with someone else. There was no real reason for Neo assuming this, no. But the worry filled his gut right next to the lukewarm coffee, and he felt his hand tighten around the mouse.

His eyes scanned the screen for what felt like ages, before finally, your bathroom door opened, and he saw you step out in a black towel. Your long black hair is wet, leaving droplets on your shoulders. Your face is bare of your usual make up, and that, for some reason, feels more invasive for a moment to Neo than even the possibility of seeing you naked soon. In fact, his face heats up as the thought finally crosses his mind that there is no scenario in which to continue watching right now would be good, or morally right, in any such way.

There is also no world in which Neo does take his eyes away. He is glued to your pixels on the screen, and he even leans in to see better as you drop your towel on to your bedroom floor. He can see every inch of your body, so much more than what he saw in your private pictures or when he caught a glance of you through the bathroom door. No, this was enough that his cock was now struggling against his pants, which feel much too tight right now.

He is so immersed in watching your after shower routine that his hand moves on its own, opening his desk drawer and finding his current most prized possession. He finds the panties he had stolen from you when last you met, and can't help but press them against his clean shaven face, inhaling your scent while he watches you.

Soon enough, you're laying on your bed, air drying from the heat, your naked form exciting Neo through the screen. What he doesn't expect is that your own hand would snake up to your breast, your other beginning to play between your legs. Good God…Neo had never caught you playing with yourself in such a way since he started watching you. If he thought he was addicted before, it has nothing on what this does for him.

As if feeling commanded by your own touching, Neo quickly undoes his belt with a frantic and needy hand, stumbling as he does from how filled with want he is. He keeps your panties pressed firmly against his face, taking that sweet scent in while he watches you open your legs wider. He lets out a whiny breath as he finally releases his cock, his hand giving no foreplay to what he wants. He hates how much power you have over him, even if it's through a screen and that vast distance of ever flowing information. Somehow, Neo has managed to find himself entranced by you, as if you were some digital siren, beckoning him to keep watching as you dip your fingers into your cunt.

Neo's breath hitches as he continues to watch you feel yourself, and he can only imagine what it would be like to actually fill you up with his cock. If he was there, would your mouth part, opening to moan out his name? He wonders how warm you would feel around his cock, and the thought of being able to actually fuck you sends him closer to the edge.

Neo watches as you continue, your moans now loud enough that your computer microphone catches it. Neo can hear your soft, whiny moans in his headphones as you get closer, not knowing at all that he's watching you through your webcam. He has no idea that you're thinking of him as much as he is you. Not yet at least.

As you get closer, Neo's name falls from your lips in a soft whimper. Neo can hardly believe his ears, did you really just moan out his name?

It's confirmed once more as your pleading gets more frantic, as if moaning his name in such a way could will him through the computer screen and there to fuck you into your bed. You have no idea that that's what Neo wants more than anything. He stuffs his face with your stolen panties and continues to imagine parting your legs even further, his cock thrusting in and out of you instead of his own hand.

It's not until your legs shake, moving and tightening together as his name shudders from your desperate voice that Neo let's himself cum. No, he had to see that you in that moment, that ecstasy. That's what he wanted to give to you, what he imagined he had done, to make you such a mess on your own bedsheets. That's what was driving him wild right now as he finally finds his peak of pleasure.

As Neo finishes, he leans back in his chair, the little fan on his desk not doing much to cool the sweat on his skin. Neo has to find a way to catch his breath, his eyes droopy and unable to focus on much. He can still see your shape, vaguely, as you also seem exhausted in your bed so far away.

Fuck. He really was fucked, huh? There was no way he was going to be able to keep this relationship professional. Not with him stalking you, and how badly he wants you.

He can't even think of the implications right now, instead he crawls into bed, shutting off almost all of his computer screens. He leaves yours on, the green light cascading on his face. He watches you curl up on your dark bed sheets, naked and too hot for covers.

Neo falls asleep tonight to you and the sound of rain beginning to tap against his window.

-----

𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 Read chapter 4 here! Be added to Neo’s taglist here! ୨୧ૄ ࣪˖

#neo x reader #thomas anderson x reader #neo x goth!reader #neo x hacker!reader #matrix fanfic #the matrix fanfic #my writing

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