#anakin pondering

[morgan-n-cheese-91]

How often do you think Obi-Wan borrows a friend's cloak and the loses it?? And then has to do the walk of shame that he lost their cloak?

[todd-queen]

just thinking...

[pandora15]

Angstpril 2023 Day 1 Prompt: Liar

tw: character having trouble breathing, open ending

Obi-Wan knew, from the moment that he agreed to take on this mission, that it would be difficult.

Faking his death, having to pretend to be someone he wasn't for the sake of his own survival, having to interact with the likes of Cad Bane and Count Dooku himself without getting his cover blown…

Well, he knew from the beginning that it would not be easy.

But none of that was as difficult as it was to return.

The transformation from Rako Hardeen back to his own body was uncomfortable — painful, leaving him shaky and somewhat feverish. The vocal emulator wreaked damage to his vocal chords, and Master Che had confirmed that there was likely some infection in his throat that she'd like to monitor over the coming days.

Which obviously meant that he was stuck in the Halls for now. It wasn't ideal, but considering the fact that he couldn't keep down most foods because of his throat and his entire body ached any time he tried to move at all, he supposed it made sense.

Obi-Wan didn't exactly like it, but even that wasn't the worst part.

Anakin wouldn't speak to him. On the ship when they were returning from Naboo, he'd maintained his distance, and once Obi-Wan had gotten his commlink back, he'd sent Anakin messages frequently, only to receive nothing.

Obi-Wan knew that the deception had upset Anakin. He understood why — more than most, he understood.

But he had hoped that Anakin would also understand why he did it.

"You lied to us," Anakin had said, when Obi-Wan had approached him on the ship. "What else have you lied to me about? Do you even care about any of us?"

Obi-Wan had no response to that — how could he, when he knew that Anakin was right? He did lie to them, after all.

And now he was here, alone, because he did what he knew to be right. Anakin wouldn't speak to him, Ahsoka wouldn't speak to him, Cody wouldn't speak to him, the Council wouldn't speak to him.

He'd succeeded on his mission, and yet —

He'd failed them all.

Letting out a sigh, Obi-Wan placed his commlink back on the table next to the bed. He winced as his throat spasmed at the rush of air, and then he coughed, bending forward slightly to gasp for air.

That seemed to trigger a chain reaction of sorts. The more he gasped for air, the more it irritated his throat, causing him to gasp even more. And the air wasn't even traveling down his throat properly, which meant that —

He couldn't breathe.

He couldn't breathe.

The room seemed to tilt on its axis around him as he shuddered and gasped and placed his forehead on his knees. There was a ringing noise, muffled by the blood rushing in his ears, followed by the sound of footsteps. Voices surrounded him, but he couldn't make them out, not until —

"Obi-Wan?" A hand on his shoulder, pushing him back until he was lying back again, head arching backward in a desperate reach for air. He couldn't speak, couldn't breathe, couldn't —

"Okay, okay, just hold on." The voice was gentle, soothing. "Your throat has swollen up too much. You're not getting enough air."

There were hands holding him down, the hiss of a hypospray, followed by the feeling of everything getting floaty and blurry, until…

His eyes snapped shut, and the memory of his lies that constantly plagued him faded away.

[lemoneste]

Ok y’all, I wonder too often wether or not Anakin would have believed Fives had Fives survived long enough to tell him abt the chips etc.

Bc like, doesn’t it all depend on who Anakin bros for more… bc sometimes I legit forget Anakin LIKED Palpatine, or at least he thought they were friends/close.

But, I’d like to think that he was still closer to his men, I’d gen love to know the fandoms opinion on that, maybe I make Anakin too bromantic in my own head and in reality he would not have given Fives the time of day,,, but even if my boy is not the sharpest pencil I’d like to think Anakin would always back up his men first.

[pinkfey]

padmé’s objectification claw scars are something that can actually be so personal

[pasukiyo]

A PLACE IN THE SEA OF STARS

anakin skywalker x f!naberrie!reader word count: 10.4k (my longest yet... i'm so sorry) warnings: two idiots pining, pining, reader is padme's younger sister (whether biological or adopted is up to you), first time having sex, soft smut, angst synopsis: a life spent in padmé amidala's shadow and never once did she ever think she'd be envious of her sister. that is, until anakin skywalker walks his way into her life and she finds herself praying that one day, he'd look at her the way he does at padmé, that she'll be given a place in the sea of stars, that her destiny will include him.

 It came as no surprise that Anakin Skywalker would be enamored with her second-to-oldest sister.

 After a life spent behind Padmé Amidala’s shadow, she’d grown accustomed to it— being overlooked. But for once, just this once, she wished history wouldn’t repeat itself, wished the prophecy could be rewritten and for once, let it be her who was chosen, who was noticed. 

 But of course, it’s futile. 

 You can sink to your knees and pray to whatever higher being is in the sky but at the end of the day, there are millions of lost souls just like you doing the same. You can have faith, you can believe that someday you’ll be heard but with each silent day that passes, your voice still falls on deaf ears. 

 She’s done her time playing the fool who sinks to her knees and pleads with the night sky to find her a place in the sea of stars, so that she may fit in a constellation too. She’s been the statue who's been made to wait— and she’s started to crumble. 

 She remembers the day she started to pray like it was yesterday. It was the day she first met Anakin Skywalker, back when he was only a Padawan, still searching for his own place in the world. Her parents were restless then, having heard of the multiple assassination attempts on their dear second oldest daughter. Of course she was worried too, but she still could feel the guilt that settled into the marrow of her bones when she found herself pondering whether her parents would react the same way if it had been her life at stake instead. 

 She remembers helping her eldest sister, Sola, and her mother with dinner in preparation for the arrival of their sister Padmé and her Jedi escort. She’d been tasked with bringing a bowl of fruit to the table and she remembered nearly being trampled over by her nieces, Ryoo and Pooja, as they squeal Padmé’s name, sprinting for the door. 

 She remembers huffing, mumbling a curse in an alien language beneath her breath just as their guests step inside, looking up from where she leaned over the table, dropping the bowl down onto the surface. She remembers her breath catching in her throat when her gaze found a sea of blue that put the Naboo waters to shame. 

 Padmé’s lips curved into a grin as she exclaimed her sister’s name, circling the table to capture her in an embrace. Her sister wrapped her arms around her and her chin found Padmé’s shoulder as the blue that took her breath away crashed into her and she swore everything changed in that moment. 

 She remembers the first time Anakin Skywalker looked at her. It was a brief, friendly locking of the eyes but a fleeting moment for him felt like lightyears for her. His eyes were the blue of the water where the sun’s reflection gently ripples and warps. They were the blue of the sky after it rains and the sun begins to spill through the cracks of the wall of clouds. 

 She’s never understood what it meant to be speechless, for something to literally steal the breath away from her lungs. But from the moment her eyes met his, she began to understand. 

 “Anakin! This is my youngest sister,” Padmé announced, pulling away from their embrace. Her spine stiffened when her sister introduced her and she watched as his full, pink lips moved to form her name. His voice is like nails scraping against the itch she can’t reach on her back, his voice is like velvet she can swallow, deliciously soft and rich against her throat. 

 “It’s nice to meet you,” Anakin dipped his chin in greeting, the silly, little braid falling off his shoulder. She drained the lump that had formed in her throat, bowing her head. Her lips trembled and her breath was shaky as she prepared her salutations but her words fell dead on the tip of her tongue when Padmé’s squeal permeated the room. 

 “And my eldest sister Sola!”

 And just like that, all attention rolled away from her and onto her eldest sisters but she still watched him, heart beating against her chest. 

 And that was the moment she began to pray. 

 She prayed, even though the looks he’d given Padmé didn’t go unnoticed. The way he watched her, even when she wasn’t the one speaking, the way he’d soak in every word, every praise for her that fell past her parents’ mouths. The way he stared longingly at her sister when he was certain nobody was watching— and no one was, for their attentions were on Padmé, save for hers. 

 It was typical. 

 It should come as no surprise that everyone would worship the ground her sister— the former Queen, current Senator of Naboo— walked on. She’s not surprised that someone young and benign like him would fall in love with her sister— she’d only seen it happen more times than she ever really cared to count. 

 And she’d never really cared about all the suitors on their knees at Padmé’s feet before— they were her sister’s problems, not hers. She’d never even really envied her sister, at least in that sense. 

 But everything changed the moment Anakin stepped through the door. Everything changed the moment their eyes met, if only for the most fleeting of seconds. 

 So she prayed. 

 Inside the inner realms of her mind, she sinks to her knees and stares into the void above her, the stars that beamed down at her twinkling, almost as if they taunted her. She swallowed her pride, folding her hands together and raising them to her chin, brow dipping as she pleaded with the higher being in the sky to hear her cry. 

 “Please, hear me, Maker,” she whispered into her mind, externally staring at Anakin, internally losing her gaze amongst the stars as if the Maker himself would appear between them. “Hear my plea. Whatever destiny you’ve pre-written for me, please be sure it includes Anakin Skywalker.”

 She didn’t see Anakin Skywalker again for another year after that. 

 Apparently, being a Jedi means he’s constantly from place to place, but next time they do end up in the same place, it’s even more fleeting than the last. She was beginning to wonder if she would ever see him again, if she was foolish to continue hoping that he might notice her, that he might even love her. But she still remembers the way his eyes flickered in recognition when they caught hers across the courtyard of Theed Royal Palace. His hair was longer and he didn’t have that ridiculous braid or tiny ponytail on the back of his neck anymore. The Chancellor was speaking to him and another Jedi with umber hair and a matching beard, but his attention was on her. 

 He looked… darker. As if the years of war had finally begun taking its toll on him. But he’s still the same man he’s always been, still the same one she’s dreamed about. He even looked better.  

 They don’t get the chance to talk, only share knowing glances, as he was on duty and their paths unfortunately didn’t cross. But that gleaming in his eyes, the one that blazes with knowing is all the kindling in the pit of her belly needs to bloom, to blossom into a raging wildfire. 

 So, she prayed again. 

 “Maker,” she said into that night sky inside of her head. The stars shone brighter, as if to laugh at the foolish girl beneath them. She ignored them of course— because she truly believed that one day, she’d prove them wrong. “Please. Hear my plea. Let Anakin Skywalker see me again. Give me a place in your sea of stars and make sure it is in Anakin Skywalker’s orbit.”

 She doesn’t see him again for another two years. 

 But still, he lingers, just like a phantom weaving through every corner she passes, cloaked in shadow. She sees Anakin Skywalker everywhere she goes— in the lakes of shining waters out in the country, in the rain that falls on a dark, cloudy day, in the litany of stars that idle in the sky. 

 She sees him in her dreams, staring the way he did at Padmé. Only, in her dreams, his gaze finds her. Almost like he had that day in the courtyard, but in her dreams, his eyes would linger longer. 

 His voice calls out to her whenever she’s sleeping and it lingers in gooseflesh on her skin, frosting over her bones. She’ll open her eyes when he calls but she’s never truly awake. Alas, if dreaming is the only way she’ll see Anakin Skywalker again, she’d gladly succumb to her sleep and trick herself into believing it is real. 

 Except tonight, she does not think she can take it much longer. 

 “Anakin,” she whispers one day when she peels her eyelids open after he calls. She says his name like it’ll be the last time she ever will. That look is on his face again— the one she’s seen so many times directed at her in her dreams, she’s nearly forgotten it wasn’t meant for her in the first place. 

 She used to wake and long for sleep to come again, just so she could watch him look at her like that. 

 But three long years of waiting and foolishly praying to beings who do not hear have begun to rust the illusion she’s deluded herself into hopelessly believing in. Three long years of silence and she’s finally cracked. She is broken— she sees it now. She’s grown weary of hoping he’d be the one to fix her. 

 His lips curve to form a smile and for three years, she’s fooled herself into believing it could be for her— truly be for her, outside of her dreams. But to be forthright, she’s tired. She’s grown tired of pretending, tired of clinging onto the dying embers of mere memories of how a man looked at someone that wasn’t her— but rather her sister. She’s grown tired of hoping, waiting, praying that one day, he may wander back into her life and thread his way into the tapestry that her destiny’s been woven into.

 Tonight is the night she forfeits with her palms to the sky, tonight is the night she yields to the stars that have taunted her for far too long and admits her defeat. That they were right all along. Tonight is the night she blows away the ashes she’s desperately held so close to her chest and sealed away in secret urns inside for far too long. 

 Tonight is the night she lets go. 

 When she wakes the following morning, birds chirp outside her window. Sunlight spills into her room as it rises over the mountains across the lake and she yawns, stretching her arms over her head. Today is merry— it is the day her sister, Padmé Amidala, marries. 

 Today is merry but instead, she feels dread seep into the marrow of her bones. She’s happy for her sister, really, she is, but it serves only as a reminder that her time is ticking, and time has turned vexing. It serves as a reminder that she must make haste to find her own purpose, to find someone who will cherish her the way she’s spent many fortnights dreaming about. Sola’s already married and found her purpose, and Padmé’s had her entire life laid out before her since she was only fourteen years of age. 

 Sola, the wife and mother, Padmé, the Queen and then the Senator, and then there’s her. Unsure. Undecided. An ellipsis. 

 She’s envious. How could she not be? She’s envious that she’ll never be the perfect mother like Sola, envious that she’ll never live up to Padmé’s legacy, she’s even grown envious of the stars: they simply idle in the night sky but even their idleness has a purpose because their places have reason, to create constellations that in turn, tell stories. 

 She knows that after today, the pressure of fulfilling whatever destiny’s been written for her will only further suffocate her. She will suffocate beneath the weight of this pressure and she will be expected to continue breathing. She’s tried for so long to keep the air in her lungs but it’s so hard when with each day that passes by, the darkness grows more appealing. 

 She’s tried so hard to find the right path she’s supposed to take, but there are so many roads, so many choices and so many consequences. She’s afraid— and it’s why she’s allowed herself to hide in her sisters’ shadows for so long. But it feels so stifling now. 

 She sighs and blinks up to the terracotta ceiling. And then of course, dread wears her bones for an entirely different reason. Because it’s inevitable that she’s going to see Anakin Skywalker today. And things will be different. 

 It’s been lingering like an annoying, little insect since Padmé announced she’d invited her Jedi friends to the wedding, ever since she heard Anakin’s name being read off the list. Things were certain to change because he is but a mere guest, and not the groom. 

 It may have come as no surprise that Anakin would fall for her, but it certainly came as a shock that Padmé wouldn’t fall for him. 

 It makes her flesh blaze with a strange anger she’s not quite sure how to describe. How could her sister have something she so desperately wanted but not pursue it? How could she reject Anakin when he would willingly break and bend to her every whim? Why must her sister take his infatuation for granted— why could it not be given to her instead?

 She thinks it must be some cruel trick the Maker is playing on her, dangling Anakin in front of her like that, cursing him with an unrequited love when she was right there. She thinks it must be the Maker’s— damn him— cruel way of taunting her, as if the sneering stars had eyes, his eyes. Even if part of her is relieved Anakin is not marrying her sister, it still feels like a blaster wound to her chest, puncturing her skin and searing her insides. 

 She hears her name called from outside her room’s door and groans. 

 “What do you want?” She replies in displeasure as the door slides open. Her eldest sister, Sola, steps into the room and glowers at her youngest sister’s tone. 

 “Well, good morning sunshine,” Sola remarks and she rolls her eyes. Sola makes her way towards the bed, dropping a dress the color of fire onto the mattress. “Is there a reason for your ill-temper today?”

 She pushes herself to sit upright, wrinkling her nose at the dress as she takes a fistful of it in her hand. “Orange?” She scoffs, tossing it back down onto the bed. “I thought we were wearing blue?”

 Sola shrugs, plopping down onto the mattress. “Padmé changed her mind last minute,” she says. “I suppose if we wore blue, we’d mesh with the background, don’t you think?”

 She sighs and flops back down against her pillows, one arm folded over her stomach, the other folded behind her head. Sola pokes her forefinger against her knee and she grumbles, narrowing her eyes at the ceiling. 

 “Now, answer the question,” her oldest sister insists. “What’s the matter with you?”

 Her eyelids flutter closed and she wishes more than anything that she could simply wink out of existence. It’s not that she doesn’t want to be here for Padmé, she does, but she’s uncertain how she could possibly explain how she feels to Sola in a way she could understand. It’s exactly this that’s made her feel so alone all these years. 

 She’s never had someone who could understand her, really get her. She’s always been different from her sisters, even before marriage and coronations and political promotions. It’s something she’s certain her sisters have known, that even her parents must’ve known. She’s never been jovial and nurturing like Sola, or clever and independent like Padmé. She’s always preferred silence and privacy, and maybe that’s been her problem. But it’s all she knows, being alone. 

 Sola’s never spent years yearning for a boy who yearns for another, so she couldn’t possibly understand. She doesn’t think she could even make her understand. 

 She sighs, lolling her head to the side until her gaze finds Sola’s. 

 “Not looking forward to wearing that dress for the entire evening,” she says instead. Sola’s eyes roll and she leans over to pinch her calf beneath the covers. She hisses and swats her sister’s hand away as she clicks her tongue, moving out of the way. 

 “Oh come on, it’s not that bad,” Sola tries to reason. 

 “It’s hideous,” she deadpans. 

 Sola deflates with the acceptance of her defeat. She grabs her sister’s knee, giving it a shake. She glares at her older sister. 

 “Come on, that can’t be the only reason why you’re in such a foul mood,” Sola insists, her bottom lip rolling in a pout and she swears it’s almost comical how her eldest sister can act like such a child. It’s a wonder how she has children of her own. 

 She blinks at Sola as a sort of realization creeps onto her eldest sister’s face and she blinks, internally grimacing. For she knows that whatever is bound to come out of her sister’s mouth next is going to be completely and utterly wrong. 

 “I think I get it now,” Sola’s tone is softer, her face falling to match it. “You’re upset you’ll be the last of us to be married.”

 And there it is. 

 She internally cringes at just how wrong Sola is but she says nothing, further prompting her sister to lean forward, reaching for the hand that rests on her stomach. Her muscles stiffen when she takes it and she wills herself to stay still. It was better to let Sola say whatever she had to say than recoil and deny it— it’s not like she had any better excuse anyways. 

 “I know it can be tough,” she begins. “Feeling like you’re left out. Believe me, I had my fair share of it. I was so jealous of yours and Padmé’s relationship when you were younger because I was so much older, I felt like I just didn’t quite fit in with you two.”

 Her eyes finally meet Sola’s and she begins to see her eldest sister in a different light. All this time, she’s believed she’s the only one who’s felt this way— lost, left behind. While this isn’t quite the same context, she still feels her heart tremble in her chest for her sister, still feels like something’s shifted. It’s at least one thing they can understand each other on. 

 “But then, I found my husband. And then I had Ryoo and Pooja,” Sola continues. “And it was the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve never been so happy in my life.”

 Sola’s grip tightens around her hand and she leans forward to place her other one on top. “I know it must seem hard, seeing as both Padmé and I are married— well, almost anyway.” Her lips curve into a soft, reassuring grin. “But you’ll find that same happiness one day. I just know it. So don’t fret, little sister.”

And there, she fears, is where her sister misses the plot. 

 She almost wants to laugh at how ridiculous this all sounds. She remains silent, however, and Sola gives the back of her hand one last reassuring pat before she lets go, sliding off of the mattress. 

 “Anyways, I’m going to breakfast. You should come too before all the blue waffles are gone.”

 She watches as her eldest sister slips out of the room, the door sliding closed behind her and she sighs, digging her knuckles into her closed eyelids until the galaxy shimmers before her. How could Sola have come so close to understanding her one minute only to read her so wrong the next?

 She doesn’t make any effort to get out of bed and in all honesty, she wishes she could simply stay here forever, or at least for the rest of the night. At least long enough that she doesn’t have to face Anakin Skywalker. 

 Because even though she’s already promised herself that she’d let him go, she wasn’t entirely certain she could hold true to her own word when she sees him again.

 The day goes by in a blur. In the blink of an eye, she’s wearing a satin dress in that deep orange she finds hideous beside Sola who stands beside Padmé. Padmé stands facing her husband-to-be, fingertips delicately placed in his palms as they recite their vows. 

 The sun paints the villa’s terrace with an orange glow and she watches it sink beneath the mountains across the lake from the corner of her eye. The sunlight looks like fire rippling in the gentle waves of the water below and she has to look away because she thinks of Anakin, how his eyes glimmer just the same. 

 She’s determined to keep her gaze away from the audience, however, because she knows he’s there, the incarnation of all she’s ever wanted, of all her bad ideas, of everything she cannot trust herself with in one. She searches the ground below, watches the way her dress ruffles with the breeze, like fire askew in the wind. 

 Padmé says something that makes the audience erupt in laughter and it startles her, so much that the hair on the back of her neck erects. When she flinches, she makes the mistake of blinking up— right into the eyes she’d been bound to avoid all night. 

 The world around Anakin Skywalker seems to stir until it’s all wet, blurry hues of orange, green, and white. Anakin is the only one she sees in high resolution— she can see every lock of wavy, dark blonde hair, every rippling wave in his irises, the scarlet line that slices just beside his right eye. She’d never seen this scar before— it must be new. 

 But what’s the most peculiar of all is that she meets his eyes— she meets his eyes. She’d blinked up to find he’d already been staring, already transfixed on her by the time their gazes met and his eyes had illuminated with that same knowing gleam she’d seen in them that day in the royal courtyard. 

 Anakin Skywalker is looking at her and she is not in a dream. It’s both momentous and utterly devastating all the same.

 She isn’t quite sure whether to look away or not. This is what she's mooned over more times than her pride will allow her to admit. She’s dreamed this many nights, for Anakin Skywalker to simply look at her and now he is. Anakin Skywalker is looking at her and she should feel elated but instead she feels… conflicted. 

 Does her heart flutter in her chest? Sure. 

 Does her stomach twist itself into knots? Certainly. 

 She felt so confident just the night before when she threw her hands up in surrender to the black sky, admitting her defeat to the stars who spent many moons mocking her that she was done. She felt so confident that she was ready to move on, to let go of this desire she’s harbored for Anakin for so long. 

 With the simplest of looks, Anakin Skywalker has proven capable of crumpling the paper walls she’d placed around herself. She was left feeling feeble, exposed and any sense of courage she thought she had was now lost. 

 Because three years of waiting and praying to higher entities who did not hear her pleas could not cease overnight. Her attraction to Anakin Skywalker could not cease in hours. She thought she’d extinguished the last flames of her withering hope but, as it turns out, a single dying ember remained. It means a part of her still yearned for him. A part of her still burned for him. 

 She wonders now, that he’s still looking at her, what possibly goes on inside his head. Why does he look at her now? Why does he stare, why do his lips twitch before curving in a smile when their eyes meet, why do they irradiate the longer her gaze lingers on his? Why does he not look sad at the wedding of the woman he loves? Why does he not even look at Padmé?

 Her mind swirls like a tempest— churning with unhinged, vicious anguish. She has to look away before the acid that bubbles in her throat can come to fruition but she can’t, and Anakin seemingly can’t tear his gaze away from her either. It’s all the more sickening and earth-shattering nonetheless. Her heart swells and pounds in her chest, the border of her vision beginning to blur with the familiar sting of tears. Her head is aching and it’s all just too much— she needs an escape. 

 “I now pronounce you, husband and wife.”

 She blinks away her emotion to the best of her ability, using the end of the ceremony as an excuse to look away as the crowd around her thunders with applause. Her mind is reeling and she feels like her head is spinning as she subconsciously claps her palms together, the sound muffled like water in her ears.  The watercolor around her stirs until it’s clear again and the entire world suddenly seems to move again— it’s her, this time, that’s in slow motion. 

 The cheering sounds like thunder, the applause like rain pelting against a window, and her mind begins to crumple, just like metal. She longs for escape, to flee and to be beside herself for the rest of the night. Padmé and her husband begin walking back down the aisle as their guests congratulate them, tossing flower petals into the air above them. She thinks that this is her chance to escape, she thinks everyone is distracted enough that no one will notice her leaving. 

 They never cared to notice her before anyways. 

 She begins to shuffle away but she doesn’t make it very far before her stomach lurches when someone clasps a hand around her wrist, tugging her forward. She snaps her head to the source to find her eldest sister, Sola, with her face illuminated by a grin. 

 “Come on!” Sola exclaims, dragging her down the aisle and back inside the villa. “It’s time to party!”

 Dread drains the blood from her cheeks but she’s given no time to protest before she’s being dragged down the aisle, right past Anakin Skywalker. She doesn’t dare look up but she feels him when she passes by, a mere brush of the arms, the feeling of his elbow brushing going just as fast as it came. 

 And it’s still enough to make liquid of her insides. 

 She drowns in a sea of people as she and Sola find Padmé, wrapped in their mother’s arms. She can hear her heart drum in her ears as Sola releases her hand to draw Padmé into an embrace, tears streaming down the apples of her cheeks. Everyone around her is so happy and she should be too— but she still feels like she’s beside the altar, caught in the trap Anakin has seemingly laid out for her. 

 A tear that’s been painfully dormant in her eye falls and she’s certain her distress shows on her face but it must be easily mistaken for tears of joy, because Padmé pulls away from Sola to turn to her, drawing her in for a hug. Her sister’s arms wrap around her body, a palm on her back, the other cupping the back of her head. Even Sola reaches forward to give her upper arm a reassuring squeeze, undoubtedly thinking back to the conversation they’d had earlier. 

 “Don’t cry for me, baby sister,” Padmé laughs tearfully beside her ear. She can feel Padmé’s smile against her shoulder. She pulls away and rubs her palms up and down the length of her arms. “I’m still the same Padmé I’ve always been.”

 She’s unable to reply— again, she’s misunderstood. But it’s her sister’s wedding day, she won’t burden her with her own confliction. So she swallows the boulder-sized lump in her throat, curving her lips just enough to form a tight-lipped smile. 

 “I’m just… happy for you,” she manages. Padmé cups her cheek and soothes the pad of her thumb over her skin before Ryoo and Pooja draw her attention away. Padmé’s hands fall from her arms and finally, she can breathe. 

 But even that is momentary. 

 “You make a perfectly fine bride if I do say so myself, Senator.”

 Her spine stiffens. She knows that voice. And she knows exactly who is near when she hears it. 

 Padmé laughs and tosses her hands. “Obi-Wan,” she greets him just like an old friend would, pulling him in for an embrace. “And little Ani.”

 How is it that she’s already seen him more tonight than she has in the past three years? She sees Anakin’s dark boots from the top of her vision, not daring to tear her gaze from the ground. 

 “Padmé,” Anakin’s deep, enriching voice sounds and rumbles deep in her belly. She shifts uncomfortably where she stands, desperate to flee. She thinks she can manage it now— Obi-Wan and Anakin are engrossed with Padmé now, right? 

 She begins to make her first attempt of escape, taking slow, careful steps to the side until her second effort crumbles when Anakin speaks her name. 

 Ice frosts over her spine and she’s no choice but to acknowledge the man she was so intent on avoiding the entire evening. Padmé and Obi-Wan are engrossed in their own conversation but Anakin’s gaze remains on her, eyes even sparkling when she finally meets them. 

 Her mouth is a desiccated oasis and her throat feels like a desert as it constricts painfully when she swallows. Still, she manages to breathe out, “Anakin.”

 It’s the first time she can ever recall having a true, proper conversation with him. The last time being when they said their goodbyes that very first time before he and Padmé left for the Lake Country. It’s confusing how this is everything she’s ever wanted yet, she feels an urge to push it all away. 

 Anakin clears his throat and his eyes flicker to his feet for a moment as if he could possibly be nervous before they find hers again. “You look good,” he says and her heart stops beating in her chest. “That dress is beautiful on you.”

 She thinks she could punch him. 

 Or kiss him. 

 She has to look away, or she may very well do the latter. 

 She wonders if this is some cruel, senseless joke the Maker is playing on her. She wonders if she’d upset him by unlatching herself from his hook and this is his way of reeling her back in. She hates that it has the potential to work. 

 “I…” she stammers and closes her lids frustratedly, willing air back into her lungs. She shakes her head— she cannot be here any longer. She may very well explode if she has to succumb to this torture for even a second more. “…thanks. Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

 And then, she bolts. 

 She’s lost track of how long she’s been locked in her room, sitting in the window, staring at the moonlight that ripples in the water below. It was long enough for the chatter downstairs to quiet to murmurs until it finally ceased altogether. The villa is now quiet and suddenly, her room feels suffocating. 

 With a sigh, her feet meet the floor and she pushes away from the window seat, cupping her neck to roll it around her shoulders as she pads towards the door. It slides open and she slips through, making her way down the hallway leading towards the main foyer. Her dress flows behind her like flames in the wind, the satin cool against her legs as she walks. Fresh, night air greets her and she inhales, letting it flood her lungs as she saunters to the wide terrace ahead. 

 She stops at the stone arches of the railing and exhales, feeling the wind sift its fingers through her hair, breathing on her skin like a lover in the throes of passion. It caresses her neck and rolls down her back, leaving gooseflesh in its wake. 

 She’d spent many nights just like this one. Staring at the moon rippling through the water, at the stars that twinkle overhead, the sky that blackens behind them. She’d spent many nights praying, releasing her pleas into the air and letting it drift away with the breeze. 

 She does not pray this time. When she lifts her head to brave the dark that faces her, she merely asks why. 

 “Why, Maker,” she whispers beneath her breath. There’s an edge, a strain to her voice that stings her throat, that feels like daggers to her chest. “Why must you be so cruel? I have done everything, I have given you everything. Why wasn’t it enough? Why do you mock me now?”

 The stars overhead gleam as they cackle, sneering at the misfit below. “You’ll never have a place among us,” they seem to say. Tears well in her eyes and she drops her head, fingernails scraping the stone edge of the railing. She leans back on her heels and wills herself to breathe before a sob could wrack her body. 

 She feels lost and utterly alone, and she truly begins to feel like the weight of this prolonged pain has started to fall on top of her. She’s lost and alone and her entire world has started to crumble around her. And then she hears her name. 

 It’s like the call that haunts her every time she closes her eyes, the same velvety voice that caresses her ear every night when she lies down in bed. But it is not a ghostly whisper this time, because it is real. 

 Footsteps sound behind her and she further scratches her nails against the railing. 

 “I was wondering where you wandered off to,” Anakin remarks as he approaches and she can feel him beside her, like a whisper of shadow creeping along her skin. She rolls back onto the balls of her feet and stands straight, sniffing. 

 “Anakin,” she says, steadily, methodically. As if it took great effort to say it without stammering. She can see him out of her peripheral, dark blonde curls falling when he leans an elbow against the railing, tilting his head in an attempt to meet her eye. 

 She does not move. 

 “I was looking for you, you know,” he continues. “You must’ve found a good hiding spot.”

 She rolls her bottom lip between her teeth. “I was in my room,” she replies simply, a steely, monotone in her voice.

 Anakin inhales and hums. “Then it makes sense why I could not find you. I would never barge into a lady’s room.”

 It’s an attempt at humor but she feels anything but. She’s stuck between a rock and a hard place with seemingly no clear solution in sight. She could walk away. She should walk away. She shouldn't spend a single second more in Anakin Skywalker’s presence— she simply couldn’t trust herself to not betray her own vow. 

 Or she could stay. She could stay and once again succumb to the fool’s game she’s been playing. She could stay and let Anakin Skywalker tie another noose around her neck, allowing him to drag her along for another three years. 

 She knows what is right. She knows what she should do. 

 But she’s frozen. 

 She cannot move, cannot even bring her lips to move so she can speak. She instead wilts, like a rose who once stood beautifully now losing its color, shriveling in on herself until she inevitably withers away. 

 She can feel Anakin draw himself just an inch closer beside her, and he’s like a single drop of rain that’s enough to somewhat salvage the husk of who she once was. 

 “Why do you avoid me?” He asks and it’s a question so simply but so damn infuriating all the while. She’s been a volcano in dormancy up until this point, but there’s a rumbling deep within her, threatening to erupt. 

 “Why are you doing this?” She questions, snapping her head towards him, brows dipped and drawn. Anakin blinks and draws back, a dent forming between his own brows. 

 “Doing what?” He asks and that feeling of wanting to ram her fist into his face comes back. She turns to fully face him and he pushes off the railing, uncertainty warping his features. 

 “This,” she gestures between them. “Staring at me. Talking to me. As if we’ve spoken more than hellos and goodbyes to each other.”

 Anakin raises a brow, the one his scar pierces, and it warps with the movement. 

 She continues. “And then you have the audacity to tell me I look beautiful in this gods-awful dress just to spite me.” She is a volcano, no longer dormant, no longer overlooked. She is exploding and Anakin is unfortunate enough to be in her wake. 

 He shakes his head. “Spite you?” He repeats. She begins to pace, a hand on her hip, the other rubbing her chin. Anakin follows, exactly like a lost puppy. “I wasn’t— I would never—“

 “Don’t say you’d never,” she turns on him, sticking an accusatory finger in his face. He blinks from it back to her, that ocean in the irises of his eyes raging, lightning cracking in the sinkhole at its center. She drops her hand and it curls at her side, her fists two shaking balls of fury. Blood bites her cheeks and she thinks of all the times she’s imagined speaking with Anakin Skywalker, of being alone with him. 

 This certainly was not how she’d ever imagined the scenario playing out. 

 She inhales. “Don’t say you’d never do anything to spite me while you are actively using me to get over Padmé,” she exhales, braving the stormy sea in his eyes. The tide shifts and his manner does too and she believes she’s already cracked him. She thinks she’s already shattered the illusion he was trying to create, that she’s lifted the wool he’s tried to veil over her eyes.

 She thinks that he believes whatever game he was trying to play was over. 

 Anakin straightens. “You have no idea what you are talking about,” he says and she scoffs, backing away. 

 “Don’t I?” She retorts. “You don’t think I’ve noticed how you’ve always looked at her? How you’ve always loved her?” 

 It brings her great pain to merely mention it. Her palms wipe at her face as tears begin welling in her eyes again, her cheeks warm as she desperately tries to quell the beginnings of a sob that stutters through her chest. She realizes now that by keeping all of these emotions, these feelings she’s harbored for Anakin for so long bottled has made her restless, has made her tick like a time bomb. 

 And her time to detonate has come. 

 He says her name again and tries to step forward, reeling back when she steps away from him. His hand wrapped in a leather glove hovers in the air between them and he drops it with an exasperated sigh. 

 “Your sister means a great deal to me, yes,” he begins. “But it is not—“

 “My sister is the sole reason why you torment me!” She snaps. “And you have no right to use how I feel against me just because she does not love you back.”

 Her words are an arrow meant to strike, to pierce through his chest, his heart her target. Her words are meant to cut deep, to draw blood, to make him bleed just like she has everyday since they met. She thinks they will, she thinks her blows will etch deep, will even leave scars in their wake. Part of her longs to see that pained expression upon his face, just like the one she wears now. 

 But her arrow merely grazes, soaring past until it sinks in the shining waters below. 

 Anakin’s face shifts but it is not in the way she thought it would, not in the way she hoped it would. His brows dip and his eyes swarm with a pained sort of desperation she’s never seen before in someone. She certainly never expected to see it in someone like him. His chest rises and falls with his breaths as he steps forward again. She stands still, unable to move. She is stunned— Anakin Skywalker has surprised her. 

 “Padmé does not love me,” he admits. “I met her when I was only a child. The only girl I’d ever seen before her was my own mother. So, of course, I felt drawn to her.” Her jaw tightens and her lips fall together in a firm, thin line. Anakin’s brows knit closer together and there’s a flicker in his eyes that she swears looks like the predecessor to tears. 

 She doesn’t quite want to believe it. He could not cry. 

 “And I spent a decade pining, a decade praying that I’d one day see her again, a decade hoping she’d been counting down the days until she saw me again, just like I was.”

 She doesn’t believe what she’s hearing. It’s a reflection of her own story, her own foolish pining, her own foolish praying but not hers, but Anakin’s. Her heart stutters in her chest and she forgets to breathe, having to gasp to gather air back into her lungs. 

 She’s never once felt like she could be understood. She’s never once felt like anyone else could experience the inner turmoil she has, the seemingly fruitless yearning she has. 

 But she’s realizing now that that's not true. Not anymore, at least. Everything is changing right before her eyes. 

 “And then I did,” Anakin shakes his head, a humorless laugh leaving his lips. “And I felt nothing. But I tried. I tried to convince myself I loved her. But I just… didn’t.”

 Her brow furrows and Anakin’s gaze darkens as it finds hers. 

 “I spent a decade obsessing over someone I didn’t really know, and how could I? I was a child.” His eyes search hers, searching for something unbeknownst to her. But she lets him. “I didn’t know what love was. All I knew was infatuation. I didn’t know what it meant to truly feel seen, to truly feel drawn to someone.”

 Anakin pauses and she gets the feeling that whatever he says next will be calamitous. 

 “Until I saw you again, that day outside the palace.”

 Her lips tremble and her breath shudders, an icy chill frosting over her skin. To think he’s thought about her everyday since their eyes briefly met in the midst of a crowded courtyard was hard to believe yet, when she looks at Anakin Skywalker now, she sees the softening of his brow, the quiver in his lips, the honesty in his eyes. 

 She’s only ever imagined one look in his eyes. Desire. 

 But she looks at him now and finds an entire galaxy— there’s longing, there’s earnest, there’s optimism, there’s burning. As it turns out, living creatures are not black and white like she initially thought them to be. Anakin Skywalker is a complex creature, made of flesh and blood and of an intricacy she’d never stopped to consider before. 

 He’s even better than she’s imagined he’d be. 

 Every moment spent under the stars, praying that she’d one day have a place among them, that she one day would sit among them with purpose rather than in an ellipsis suddenly begins to feel like it wasn’t all for nothing after all. Every prayer she’s whispered into the night breeze with Anakin Skywalker’s name in it suddenly feels like they begin to matter, like they begin to come true. 

 Still, she is wary, and Anakin seems to recognize this caution. 

 He takes a step closer and he steals the breath from her chest, just like he had the first moment she saw him. Her fingers twitch, itching to find his, her palms tingling with the desire to feel his skin, her lips buzzing with yearning. She does not touch him, she does not kiss him, she does not do anything. She simply waits for the rest of his story to unfold and her brain aches with the hope that it will unravel into hers. 

 “I saw you that day at the palace to find you were already looking at me. That you were already seeing me,” he mutters, a little breathlessly. “It may have been for… for only a moment but when you looked at me, I felt…” he trails off, a furrow in his brow as he searches for the correct word. “…I felt… like something shifted.”

 She watches as he rolls his lips together, watches as the moonlight catches how they glisten with spittle. Her breath catches a little bit, her gaze lingering there, her desire to lap it all up flaring. 

 “It felt like there was a string there between us I’d never noticed before,” he continues. “There was a connection I’d never realized until the moment our eyes met. I felt you, and I felt you see me. There hasn’t been a day that’s passed by since where I didn’t feel you, where I didn’t feel like we were connected, like we were two stars written in the same constellation.”

 Her chest rises and falls to the erratic beating of her heart as Anakin draws nearer, the hand with his glove meeting her cheek with a tenderness she’d felt from no one before. She’d never realized how starved of touch she’s been until now and it feels so invigorating. Her stare drops to his lips and she feels that string Anakin must’ve been talking about, feels it drawing her closer into his mouth. 

 “Padmé does not love me back, and I do not care,” he says in just above a whisper, his voice rising and falling in a way that jellifies her knees, that makes liquid of her insides. “Because I am burning– foolishly, maybe, yes– for you.”

 She inhales sharply and it truly feels like all her prayers are finally being answered, like she’s being inducted into her rightful place in the sea of stars. And in her constellation, Anakin Skywalker resides too. 

 She reaches up with a hand to hold the crook of his elbow that’s strung between them as he brings his other, ungloved hand to rest on her other cheek. She feels his skin on her cheek as the pad of his thumb soothes over the warmth of her flesh and her body quakes with shivers that roll down her spine all the way to her toes. He begins to lean in, his breath hot where it fans against her skin but she tilts backwards, just enough for him to halt, a quirk in one of his brows. 

 “I will not let you settle for me, Anakin Skywalker,” she whispers, admitting that insecurity still lingers, despite his words. Anakin’s eyes narrow as he uses his hands on either sides of her face to draw her in, his lips but a mere whisper away from hers when he murmurs, “settle? This is not settling. This is binding.”

 Then, his lips are on hers in an electrifying bind that shatters her spine with cracks of lightning and she falls into him, her hands on either of his forearms to keep herself steady. 

 Anakin kisses her with an ardor she could never even dream up in all of her wildest of fantasies. He kisses her and she feels like she finally fits in her dress, as it is the color of fire and she’s engulfed in flames. He kisses her and he is the flame that lights her candle, the flame that melts her from the center, that makes heat course through her that washes all the way down to her toes. He kisses her and she is melting, right into him. 

 His tongue pirouettes over hers and she hums into his mouth, feeling his fingers thread through her hair. Her heart is pounding and her lips are buzzing but all she feels is Anakin, she feels the muscles in his arms, the warmth that radiates off his body and spills into her. She feels the push and pull of the passion, the yearning he’s kept inside all this time. She feels her own longing and fervor pour into him and they are floating, two clouds that collide into one another to become one. 

 Anakin steps forward and steps backwards until she hits a wall. When they pull away for breath, she realizes he’s backed her into one of the pillars, a vine caught in the hair on the back of her head. Their chests heave with the weight of their breaths and she watches as Anakin’s hand, not the gloved one, but the one with skin rises, following it as it reaches for her neck. She shudders when he touches her collarbone, exposed from the side of the fiery satin of her dress. His fingertips sear her skin as it drags to the neck of her dress, following the satin where it wraps around her throat, all the way to the back of her neck where the lace falls. 

 Her breath catches when his fingers find the small strings keeping her dress together. Her gaze finds his again to find he’s already staring, a narrow, earnest look upon his face that darkens his eyes and hardens his features. There is a silent question that hangs in the air between them: “do you want to stop?”

 Maybe they’re moving too fast. Maybe this is crazy, maybe they’re simply caught up in the moment, high off the feeling of burning for someone who burns for them too. But after years of pining, of waiting, of praying, it only feels right. 

 But still, she asks, “what if someone sees? Someone like Obi-Wan who can get you in trouble?”

 Anakin shakes his head, “they won’t. Now, I don’t want to talk about Obi-Wan. Do you want to stop?”

 The shake of her head is all Anakin needs to see before he unlaces the strings holding her dress together, the satin falling like a spark blazing down the frayed edges of a rope until it pools at her elbows. Her breasts spill from the dress and the night’s ghostly whisper chills her skin, peaking her nipples. 

 Anakin’s eyes devour and she is prey. 

 His stare pierces through her skin to the marrow of her bones that catch a chill and she quakes. He meets her eyes again as his hands drift lower, dipping until they finally find her chest. A sharp gasp escapes when his palms cup either of her breasts and she arches into his touch, already aching for more. 

 “Anakin!” She gasps in a breathy exclaim when he dips his chin to press a kiss over the top of one of her breasts, heat blossoming in his lips’ wake. His eyes catch her again, a little warily. “Is this okay?” He asks, his voice low and gravely, scratching the itch in her brain she didn’t even know she had. It makes her knees feel weak and if it hadn’t been for his body pressed up against hers, she would’ve crumpled straight to the ground. 

 “Yes,” she breathes, chest heaving into his palms. “I’m sorry, I’ve just… never…”

 Anakin’s lips curve and she can see a flash of white peek between them. He shakes his head. “Me neither,” he admits with a breathy laugh and she titters too, grateful for the fact that she’s not the only one who’s a little green. 

 “Can I keep going?” He questions and his voice is liquid desire, melting straight down to her core. She swallows the lump that’s formed in her throat, nodding. “Please,” she adds, feeling her heart beat straight into his palm. 

 Anakin’s head dips again and she watches, cheeks warm as he places an open-mouthed kiss just above her nipple. His palm kneads the other breast as his lips venture just an inch lower, finding the peaked bud that awaits, suckling it into his mouth. 

 It’s like electricity flooding through her veins. 

 She throws her head back, lips falling agape as her eyelids snap closed, soaking in the pleasure of Anakin’s lips on her nipple. He cautiously flicks his tongue against the bud, watching through his lids as a moan falls from her lips, encouraging him to do it again. He flattens his tongue against her nipple and licks a long, fat stripe from the underside of it up, feeling her tremble in his arms. He lets go of her breast with a wet pop, trailing kisses through the valley between them to make his way to the other. 

 Touching him, feeling him, kissing him is somehow even better than she’d ever imagined, even after all those years of dreaming for moments like this. She can’t believe she’s gone so long without feeling him like this, she doesn’t think she can ever stop touching him. 

 Anakin suckles on her breast, flicking his tongue against her nipple as his hand not wrapped in a glove ventures down her body, past her waist, down her hip. He pulls the satin material of her dress up until his arm can sneak his way beneath it and she shivers when his fingers find her center over her underwear. Her nails dig into his sleeves above his shoulders, holding her breath as he finds the wet spot in her underwear, gently pressing against it. 

 Her hands tighten on his shoulders and ceases all movement, peering up at her. “You’re wet,” he says rather matter-of-factly because of course she is, how could she not be? She nods down at him, swallowing thick layers of saliva down her throat. “Can I touch you here?” He asks and his voice drops to that silky, velvety tone that makes her core ache. She presses her lips together to stifle her groan, head vigorously nodding up and down. 

 “Gods yes, Anakin,” she moans, slowly rocking her hips against his finger. “Please.”

 She feels filthy in a way for asking, for needing friction so desperately. She’s only ever taken her own fingers when she’s too lost in pleasure at night to sleep, never been touched by anyone else but it’s all she craves now, for Anakin’s fingers to touch her, for him— whatever part it may be— to be inside her. 

 A flame had been ignited in the pit of her belly long ago, back when Anakin first stepped through the door the day they met. It’s sat stagnant for too long, waiting for its moment to further bloom and now it has. It blossomed when her eyes met Anakin’s that day in the courtyard but it’s now in full bloom, now that they burn together, now that his kisses have seared her skin, now that his fingers are pulling her underwear down her thighs, just enough that he can reach her center. 

 When his fingertips brush her clit, she bursts. 

 Anakin’s arm wraps around her waist as she practically collapses into him, his middle finger drawing circles against her clit, his breath hot as his lips rest on her brow. 

 “Is this good?” He asks against her forehead. “Do you feel good?” He questions again as he adds his forefinger to the mix, applying just a little more pressure and it makes her eyes roll. 

 “Yes, just… just don’t stop,” she exhales, feeling her stomach twist itself into a knot, his fingers against her clit threatening to pull it undone any moment. 

 So he doesn’t. 

 He’s unrelenting in the way his fingers press to the aching bud in her center, tracing tight circles until her eyes squeeze closed so hard, milky-ways shimmer behind her lids. He dares venture lower, gathering her slick on the pads of his fingers as he teases near her entrance. It’s a foreign and strange feeling, it’s a pattern she’s traced many times with her own fingers but never been touched by someone else. Even in spite of how many nights she spent trekking that path wishing it was Anakin’s fingers instead, but it’s still strange feeling him there now. 

 She clutches his arm tighter and he slows, beginning to retract his hand. She stops him, lifting her head until their eyes meet again. 

 “No,” she pants, shaking her head. “Don’t stop, just… just take it slow.”

 He nods, his finger a little unsure as it circles her entrance, unintentionally teasing until she begins to crack. She’s panting, trying to wiggle her hips so that she can draw his fingers in, seeking that feeling of being full. Anakin dips his forefinger into her hole and she tosses her head back, her lips parting for an “oh” to emit. 

 He watches her face, even if she can’t see it, she can feel his gaze behind her closed lids. He is testing the waters, learning what makes her moan, what makes her squirm, what makes her come. Slowly, he sinks his finger further in and she feels every single millimeter that drags along her walls until he’s knuckle deep. Her legs feel like jelly and her knees begin to wobble, nails clinging to his sleeves like they were her lifeline. 

 Pressure builds in the pit of her belly as Anakin carefully retracts his finger, just to sink it back in again, a slow, cautious rhythm that leaves her mind spinning. His fingers are so much bigger than hers and she already feels so stuffed despite it only being one finger. Somehow, it’s too much and not enough at the same time. 

 “Ana… Anakin,” she gasps, peeling open her lids to find he’s already looking. His finger slows but picks up its pace again when he realizes she’s not in any pain. “Another.”

 His brow dips and his head tilts in confusion, uncertain what she means. She gathers moisture on her lips, trying to speak through the pleasure-driven haze in her mind. 

 “Another finger. Please.”

 Their eyes lock and there’s a flicker in his, a hint of doubt. 

 “Are you su—“

 “Please.”

 So, Anakin gathers her lips with his and she mewls into his mouth when he presses his middle against his pointer, sinking them into her cunt until they reach as far as they can. She’s trembling against him but he keeps her upright, with his arm and with his lips. 

 Just one of Anakin’s fingers had made her feel stuffed but two of his fingers made her feel full to the brim. Her walls clench around his fingers and she gasps his name like the beginning of a prayer, pleading for more. 

 It’s a twist on the prayers she recites to the Maker every night. It’s rewriting her every broken hymn, transforming it into something entirely new. She moans Anakin’s name and his fingers turn it into a song so that she cries like a dove into the night. The Maker may have left her feeling broken, wasted, unimportant but Anakin has found her, patched her up, polished her until she’s brand new. 

 The tangle in her belly begins to rupture, slowly unraveling and so she pushes his arm away, his fingers sliding out of her cunt, her walls pulsing with the loss. They both pant and Anakin’s face hardens in question as his chest heaves. 

 “What is it?” He asks, searching her face. 

 She gathers air deep in her chest. “I want…” She trails off, her embarrassment washing over her cheeks in blood. Her gaze drops and Anakin tilts his head to find it again, their eyes locked. He says nothing, only the nod of his head encourages her to continue. “…I want more. I want… I want you to…”

 She purses her lips in frustration. For heaven’s sake, she’s talking to the man who just had his fingers inside of her mere moments ago. Why does she feel embarrassed now?

 She takes another deep breath, mustering the courage to tell what she truly wants. “…I want you to feel good too.”

 Something shifts in Anakin’s eyes. It could be easily mistaken as a trick of the light but she sees it, she feels it. Anakin is burning just the same as her, his pupils becoming a backdrop behind the fires of desire, and she burns within it. 

 She watches as Anakin’s hand sinks below the belt around his middle, all the way down to the waistband of his trousers beneath his dark tunic. She watches with her breath lodged at the base of her throat as he pulls down his pants, just enough for his cock to be set free and oh, it is just like her dreams but even better. 

 Nothing could have ever prepared her for the sight of Anakin Skywalker’s cock. Not even the wildest of her dreams could ever capture the essence of the art of Anakin Skywalker. He is handcrafted by the gods themselves— he is the physical embodiment of masterpiece. 

 He steps forward and towers over her, his breath like smoke rolling over her face. She peers up at him, her chest heaving with the effort of breathing. His hands find either side of her face and she stops breathing altogether, wondering what he will do next. 

 Then, “put your arms here,” he whispers, guiding her arms over his shoulder. “And hold on.”

 She squeals when he drops his hands to the undersides of her thighs, lifting her off the ground so that her ankles lock behind his back. Her arms tighten around his neck as he presses her back against the pillar, his chest pressed into hers. She can feel his length as it’s squeezed between either of their bodies and her walls clench around nothing, practically sobbing to feel him inside. 

 For a moment, the world stills around them and it’s like when she sees him in the audience during Padmé’s wedding. The night stirs and blurs until it’s dark watercolor, but Anakin is what she sees in high resolution. It’s the perfect mirage— she and Anakin feel like two stars in the middle of the black abyss above, forming their own little constellation. 

 And when Anakin finally slides himself inside of her, she feels like her place in the sea of stars has been cemented. She finally feels like she’s where she belongs.

a/n; SO! MY LONGEST IMAGINE YET.... may or may not have gotten a bit carried away (more like a little too wordy...) BUT! i really hope some of you enjoy and i truly appreciate anyone who reads this all the way through. i know 10k words is a lot 😭 also i hope this doesn’t seem too insta-lovey… this idea just came to me in a dream so i wrote what I dreamt lol

💫 if you enjoyed, please consider reblogging or even leaving a reply to let me know! it means the world to me 🫶

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@k1ttenmittonz

[snowwybear]

𝑔𝑜𝓁𝒹𝑒𝓃 𝓇𝑒𝓉𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇/ 𝖇𝖑𝖆𝖈𝖐 𝖈𝖆𝖙| 𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘥

for my Star Wars girlies out there.

It was a stupid idea. Correction his stupid idea. Vinnie had suggested a Star Wars marathon, the weekend of May 4th. Of course you had said yes, you loved Star Wars. Episode 4, 5, 6 couldn't have gone any better - you spent the time laughing and reminiscing, cuddled up together on the couch.

Then came the prequals, iconically bad. Episodes 1 and 2 went smoothly too, it wasn't until you guys started episode 3 when Vinnie realised his fatal error. You were only focused on, one mister Anakin Skywalker. Your gaze was focused on him, you were making comments about whatever came into your mind, all of your attention was being directed at Anakin Skywalker. You weren't even cuddling anymore, you were sat cross legged, head in your hand gawking at someone other than your boyfriend.

Vinnie didn't know why he felt jealous, he felt stupid feeling this way over a fictional character. Maybe because you were making comments about him that you have never even said about Vinnie. Maybe because this fictional character was getting attention from you that he always craved.

You guys had paused the movie to grab some food and water, stretch and take a small break from the TV. As you were preparing some food of the two you, an idea came to his head. It sounded so stupid, but he was desperate for your attention. He left the room and got changed into something comfier. And by comfier, I mean plaid pyjama pants and his abs on full display.

"What with the?' You asked motioning to the lack of a shirt on your boyfriend.

"Oh, I'm just getting a little hot in here". He replied

You guys had gotten settled back into the movie and you were still gawking at Anakin who was coincidently also now shirtless. Vinnie let out a frustrated sigh.

"What's wrong?" You turned over at Vinnie.

"Nothing, just enjoying you flirting with your new boyfriend". Vinnie said bluntly.

"Aww is wittle Vinnie jealous". You mocked, moving your hand up to his hair trying to mess it up.

Vinnie moved his head out of the way. "Stop, it's not funny".

You heard the annoyance in his tone, he's never annoyed with you. Vinnie stood up from the couch and made his way to the bedroom.

"Where are you going?" You ask.

"To bed". You heard the bedroom door slam. You paused the movie before sitting there for a few minutes pondering about what just happened.

You turned off the TV, made your way to the bedroom, got changed and climbed into bed wrapping your arms around Vinnie's torso.

"Go away". He said a little agitated.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong".

"Go ask your boyfriend since you seem to give all your attention to him".

"Why would I when I have my beautiful boyfriend right here". You gave some small kisses to his shoulder.

Vinnie wouldn't admit this, but he how clingy you were being right now. "Can you just go away". Vinnie tried to pry your hands off him but in return, you wrapped your leg over his hip essentially trapping him.

"No, not until you let me love you". You were fighting against Vinnie to stay clinging onto his body. The two of you wrestled around each other until you finally won by straddling his waist.

"Oh my god, your so annoying". Vinnie whined.

"Just listen, I'm sorry if I made you feel jealous. You know if you needed a little extra attention, you could have just said". You softly said, lightly creasing his chest.

"Yeah whatever". He joked. You just smiled and shook your head at him.

"Considering your this jealous now, I can't wait to see what happens when we watch The Mandalorian. Because let me tell you babe that man is so fucking ho....". You squealed as Vinnie cut you off by flipping you over onto your back.

"For the love of god, shut up". Vinnie said before slamming his lips into yours.

[hanasnx]

MINORS DNI 18+

ANAKIN SKYWALKER who pissed you the fuck off. Who’s earned himself a one-way trip to the doghouse. Who tries to talk his way through the silent treatment, everything from questions to pleas to shouting. You won’t have it, and it kills him to be ignored.

“Well, fine! Be that way.” he announces loudly throughout the house, storming to the opposite side to leave you completely alone. He punishes you for being upset with him, for needing space from him. Your unhealthy response is met with his in poetic turn.

He sleeps by himself that night. Even though sleep is inaccessible, he lies on his back with his arms crossed over his chest. The delicate crease in his brow has deepened to a permanent crevice, scowling at the light fixture in the ceiling. He can’t even recall exactly what caused this disruption and he certainly doesn’t believe it’s his fault. Whatever stance he took that offended you is clearly his private beliefs and you should’ve respected that. His metal fingers tap in a wave across his bicep, and he picks up his head to glance at the doorway of the living room as if you would be there to greet him. No such thing. You’re probably fast asleep in the comforts of your shared bed, the bed you so carelessly kicked him out of.

The couch is uncomfortable. The material is smooth but naturally cold against his bare back and his thin black pants. He’s used to his many covers, and a body next to him.

A warm, smooth body. He misses it. Soft and creamy in texture, he misses the way it winds around him. But you’re being difficult. As if you’re a princess, every interaction between the two of you has been scrutinized with extreme prejudice by your judgmental eyes. You questioned his every move towards you, every touch, every word. Your wrath knew no bounds and now he’s cold and alone and it’s your fault. He doesn’t want you. He doesn’t want you near him, holding him, running your hands through his hair. He doesn’t want your massages that release muscle tensions he didn’t even know he had, he doesn’t want your kind smile against his ear as you whisper your dirty little secrets, he doesn’t want your experienced hand running down the hair at his abdomen to caress him through his sleepwear.

You’ve had a prissy little attitude he could fuck out of you, if he wanted to. His grip on his bicep tightens, sharp spite taking root within his heart as he curses himself in Huttese. There’s a dirty word he’d like to call you right now, he’d like to sneer it in your face in a language you can’t understand just so you can be offended without reason. It’ll give you a taste of the betrayal’s he’s felt this night.

The chaise he lays on is not long enough for his body, his bare feet hang off the arm rest, and he shifts so he can plant them there. Once properly leveraged, he straightens his legs so he pushes himself up to more of a sit as a sneer twitches at the corner of his nose. He has half a mind to go disturb you while you peacefully slumber, interrupt you with his jealousy over your comfort and demand that if you have a problem with him that you should be the one to leave. You’d fit on this useless couch anyway. A yelling match would surely ensue; he’d be able to raise his voice over yours and finally make you understand his point of view. You’d be so eager to make it up to him, so keen to please him that you’d do anything, wouldn’t you? Pondering its possibilities has his left hand lured to the sudden ache between his legs.

You’d be so broken up over how coldly you’ve treated him, you’d spoil him. You’d pamper him with apologies and compliments he’d ignore, you’d beg to rub his sore shoulders and arms so that he’d look at you again. Kisses would be planted wherever you could reach, and he’d direct you with a palm on your head to where your lips belong. Sweetly you’d worship on his manhood, coaxing him to attention with patience and enthusiasm until he’s ready to free it. Wouldn’t matter how long he’d let you perform for him, you wouldn’t say a word about rushing him. Briefly, he considers the notion that you’d let him bat it against your cheek, and rub it on your face. He’d hump your head just to see the thick mix of fluids coat your pretty features. If he’s feeling particularly vengeful, he might fuck your throat with the intent to hurt, the intent to choke. You’d have to campaign for his mercy by flattering for his ego because if you’re too pitiful he’ll be too inclined to suffocate you with his every inch plugging your airway. Big hands at the back of your head to keep you pinned while you sputter and spray around his base. Your mess of stringy saliva would dribble down his balls and catch on the hair on his thighs.

A noise of the house creaks and his eyes fly open. His hand has come to caress himself, balled around his solid shaft that pulses with need. He can practically feel the blood pump through it, the sensitive skin burning for relief as he’s rawed it against the material of his pants.

He pushes through the discomfort, and plunges the hand down his waistband, fisting his red hot cock with a callused grasp.

[saphronethaleph]

The Convenience of Independent Subsystems

R2-D2 beeped, indignantly.

It was something he was quite good at.

If he was being fair, of course, he knew that nobody had actually intended for this to happen. Anakin – or Vader, he’d called himself now, but designations could change – had obviously intended to get back in the fighter and fly back to wherever the Emperor wanted him to go.

And Obi-Wan had clearly been quite distraught about the situation, so he simply hadn’t thought through how Anakin had arrived in the first place. While Padme was entirely incapacitated, so there wasn’t much hope of a good outcome there.

But still. R2 would have expected 3P0 to remember him, and that was a cause for indignant beeping.

He scanned the available frequencies, trying to work out where exactly he should go. Neither 3P0 nor Obi-Wan had been kind enough to notice him, so of course they hadn’t bothered to tell him where to go either, and while there was a hyperspace ring floating up there for him to use it would be pointless to take off without some idea of where to go.

R2 spun his dome around, as he pondered.

Maybe Naboo? Naboo was where he’d started out, and Jar Jar Binks was funny. That was definitely an option.

Or perhaps travelling to Tatooine would be better. C-3P0 was from Tatooine, and a bit of creative mayhem might just solve a few problems.

He’d have a much better idea of where to go if he knew where Padme, Obi-Wan and C-3P0 had gone, but he’d gone through that recently… though, then again, maybe he should take up flying around and doing deeds. Occasionally even good ones.

No, that wasn’t going to work. He was cross-linked into the starfighter systems, to the extent he could certainly operate all the individual controls, but most people weren’t happy with a droid as independent as he was. Especially after all the wars so far.

It would definitely require some thought.

Then something pinged up on his short range scanners, with a very interesting call sign.

“Luke,” Padme declared. “And this one is… Leia.”

She sighed. “I… thank you for being here, Obi-Wan.”

“You’re talking like you’re going to die,” Obi-Wan protested. “Don’t do that.”

“Ani was having dreams, about me dying,” Padme murmured.

“She’s very tired,” the Polis Massa medical droid reported. “She should make a recovery, though I will want to have stern words with her previous OB/GYN.”

Padme looked just guilty enough that Obi-Wan assumed there hadn’t been an OB/GYN, which was probably part of the problem.

Then C-3P0 ran in.

“Mistress Padme!” he said. “Jedi Master Obi-Wan, sir! I have picked up a message from R2-D2!”

“You have?” Obi-Wan asked. “Where… oh.”

His face fell. “He got left on Mustafar, didn’t he? Anakin must have got there somehow.”

“Quite correct, sir,” C-3P0 said. “At least, that he is still near Mustafar, though he has been using the hyperspace ring to broadcast to me. However, the main bulk of his message is relating to a different matter entirely.”

The protocol droid looked uncertain. “Would you be so kind as to elaborate what ‘scratch one Emperor’ means?”

Obi-Wan boggled for a moment.

“...can you confirm that?” he asked.

“I can certainly ask,” C-3P0 replied, holding up a comlink, then twittered into it in binary.

R2 beeped a reply.

“It seems a shuttle broadcasting the code Imperial One flew over to where Master Anakin was,” C-3P0 declared. “So R2 shot it down with Master Anakin’s fighter. It crashed into the lava and exploded.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Padme, who’d passed out after her stressful day.

“...well,” he said. “I think we may need to get R2-D2 a medal. Possibly another medal.”

He paused.

“Maybe a seat on the Jedi Council…”

[mistress-amidala]

Affairs of the Heart

.·:¨༺༻¨:·.

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚘𝚗𝚎. 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐃𝐚𝐲

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

First day of Junior year. You and Ahsoka stood, frozen in front of the big double doors. Books in hand, backpacks hanging from your shoulders. Yet neither of you moved a muscle. Until Ahsoka spoke up, “it’s not too late you know? We could fake our deaths, move to a different country.” She suggests, and as ridiculous as it sounded. You knew she was dead serious.

You turned to face her. A nervous smile tugging at your lips, “and face the wrath of Ben?” You digressed, raising a brow.

She nods, a nervous smile of her own forming on her lips. “Fair point.” You nod, anxiety gnawing at your gut. You both take a deep breath. “We can do this,” Ahsoka mumbles. “It can’t be that hard right?” She questions, turning to face you.

“It can’t be… people do it everyday. We should be fine… what’s the worst that could happen?” You ponder, looking back to her.

Ahsoka grimaces, “knock wood.” As she looks around for something to knock on. Coming up short she gently knocks your forehead. Making you narrow your eyes at her playfully. “Safety precaution,” she claimed with a teasing grin.

You sigh, looking back to the daunting double doors. “We gotta go…”

“I know,” she groans. Resting her head on your shoulder, a pout on her lips. You wrap your arm around her shoulder encouragingly. Gently tugging her along with you as your follow behind another group of juniors. Also anxious about their first day. “At least we have home room together,” she adds.

“Exactly,” you pat her shoulder. “We’re gonna be fine, plus at least your brother’s here. He can show us around.”

A cheeky smile tugs at her lips, a glint of something mischievous in her eyes. “Yeah, I’ve forgotten where everything is since orientation.” Making you chuckle as you head past the double doors, into the hallway. Bustling with other students, trying to find their home rooms. Luckily you two do have home room together you couldn’t imagine having to face the first day of school alone, looking around you feel a gentle tug on your arm. Snapping your head around, you see a pair of bright blue eyes. Behind a pair of familiar gold rimmed glasses. Anakin.

His thumb draws gentle comforting circles on your elbow, “are you alright? You look a little freaked,” he asks softly. Looking between you and Ahsoka, his gaze lingering on you. A smile plastered on his plump pink lips.

“We’re lost,” Ahsoka pipes up.

A knowing grin graces his face. As he nods in understanding, “I can see that Snips. What are your locker numbers?” Anakin questions softly, his brows furrowing. As he looked at the ink on your wrists where you’d written them so you didn’t forget. Making a soft chuckle slip from his parted lips. “Okay Snips you are…” He looks up to the various rows of lockers, “right there near the water fountain.”

Making her face light up, “score.” Anakin looks down, gently turning your wrist so he could see your locker number. The feel of your soft skin against his fingertips sending goosebumps along his skin. Accommodated by a faint blush scattering his cheeks, luckily for him you were too preoccupied looking for the matching number adorning your locker. Ahsoka on the other hand eyed her brother with a knowing grin, taking the few steps to reach her locker. Still well within eavesdropping distance of you two.

Anakin clears his throat to give him some semblance of control over his nerves. “Yours will be a little further down, I can take you if you want?” He suggests, his bright eyes gazing into yours. As his golden curls frame his face, perfectly. Staring back at him you feel your face get a little warmer from his undivided attention. Your eyes flicker away from him for a moment, to Ahsoka. Who was shoving her things into her locker.

Divider creds: @h-aewo @plutism

[david-talks-sw]

I will say: at least Leslye Headland has a clear idea of what she's going for. I don't agree with her criticisms of the Jedi, but I'm actually so glad that she's done so many interviews to elaborate on her POV.

Compare that to Dave Filoni and Jon Favreau's press tours. Clearly, Headland focuses much more on explaining lore stuff, whereas they only comment on surface-level things.

Especially when it comes to the Jedi, like...

Filoni will ask a question. "Are the Jedi so perfect...? Is attachment really so bad? Have they maybe lost their way? Was Anakin really to blame...?"

And like, asking questions is nice, I appreciate that you're trying to get your viewers to ponder... but you gotta tell a coherent story behind it. Like, at some point your narrative needs to land somewhere on that thesis. What's the moral of the story, here?

Headland makes a statement: "The Jedi are flawed. Here's why I think so."

Okay. Cool. I disagree, but at least you've laid out your arguments and now there's an open discussion. Cheers.

Again, the show isn't perfect (see my two previous posts) but I love that at least there's a point to it all and that Leslye Headland is so vocal about it. Reminds me of how George did it.

With stuff like Ahsoka, you can extrapolate a point from it... but it's really vague, so you really need to do the legwork.

[ragnarlothcat]

Okay okay inspired by puss in boots the last wish no spoilers aside from the themes of the movie but I was thinking of an au where Anakin is death aka the grim reaper especially 5 times Obi Wan has a brush with death + 1 where death saves him

And I don't mean these as Anakin hunting Obi or puts Obi Wan in life threatening situations but is an observer of Obi Wan life and the moments where he is close to death

And Obi Wan takes comfort of Anakin being with him, where he thinks oh these is it. Even if he thinks Anakin is possibly a hallucination/illusion of his mind his still grateful of his company that his not alone

And the one time Anakin saves Obi Wan from Palpatine who thinks is above death but Anakin has come to collect his debt

Also Obikin hades and persephone vibes jznksksks Anyway thank you for reading I hope your having a great day!!!!!

Okay I will admit my very first reaction to this was "they've made another Puss in Boots movie????" But you're right, it came out like a month ago and has been nominated for awards. I have no explanation for how I was unaware of this other than a parallel universe theory.

But I like this idea! You know I love a good 5 + 1 fic (you might not know that, it is possible you don't keep an encyclopedia of my preferences) and this is a really neat one. I like making Anakin something otherworldly and poor Obi-Wan does have a rough go of it in canon. Anakin gets electrocuted the most but the universe is out to get Obi-Wan specifically. We could easily pull 5 times he nearly dies straight from the source material and just filter out the ones Anakin is directly responsible for (fewer crash landings).

Also I'm a big fan of Anakin "I can totally save my wife from dying, I just have to betray the entire galaxy and everyone who cares about me" Skywalker being the grim reaper. It's a nice change of pace! Maybe it's penance for having tried to cheat death in the past or something, idk. But I like it!!! And yes he does kill Palpatine and then he and Obi-Wan live happily ever after (or, well, Obi-Wan does) and then when Obi-Wan dies he joins Anakin and I guess helps ferry people to the space afterlife too? That feels very Obi-Wan since in canon he helps Anakin become a ghost 🤔

Anyway I have a lot of thoughts about this clearly but I love it! The real question, even more important than all the character work and interesting discussions about mortality: what does grim Anakin wear??? (I'm joking but also I bet he's very handsome in a moody sort of way)

[cookybananas]

It's Been A Long Time, Old Friend (Part II) - Unburnt!Darth Vader x Reader

author's note: apologies for the delay! but here is part II to 'Its Been A Long Time, Old Friend'. I am currently working on the third chapter, which will be the final part of the mini-series. I am hoping to release it within the next few days. please let me know what you think of the series so far! xx

summary: where Darth Vader arrives on the planet of Lianna. Only to discover that the Queen of Lianna was once his old flame during his Jedi years. part I: It's Been A Long Time, Old Friend (Part I)

You couldn't sleep as well as you thought last night. You felt overwhelming chilly and cold. Perhaps you accidentally left one of your balcony doors open.

Chira was doing your hair as you accessorized yourself with jewelry. You were expected to dress a certain way ever since you became a monarch. Displaying your wealth and status in the intricate, puffy gowns, bouffant hair, and excessive jewelry. At times, you felt the clothing and jewelry you had wore was a bit much, but to your dismay, you didn't have a say in it.

"Is everything alright Y/N?" Chira spoke up, noticing how you were less talkative this morning.

"Yes, Chira...It's just a surprise to find out that Lord Vader would be staying with us the next four weeks. Other than that, everything is fine." You gave her a small smile as you both made your way out of your chambers. Both you and Chira talked some more before you dismissed her to her other duties.

After indulging in breakfast with Kairos in silence as per usual, he eventually left as he had gone off to show Lord Vader the facilities to where his TIE fighters were being built.

You were in the palace's private library, reading away. Life in the palace was boring, but you selfishly prefer this than having to hop planets every week. You didn't have to work in terrible conditions and worry about when or what your next meal was. At times, you weren't sure how long you could get away living this life, or how long the Empire would reign for.

Vader's presence on Lianna left you on edge, you began to ponder at your ruminations. What if you hadn't fully cut yourself off from the force? When the Jedi fell, inquisitors arose and hunted any Jedi. Whether it was to turn them into inquisitors or just simply kill them off. At times, you wanted to reach out to Obi-Wan and see how he was doing. Though, you and Obi-Wan agreed to never disclosed your locations to each other, for the sake of each other's safety, you couldn't deny that you missed your old friend dearly. But there one person you missed the most, and it was your former lover, Anakin Skywalker.

You felt like a traitor when you were forced to marry Kairos. You felt as if you betrayed Obi-Wan, yourself, and most importantly, Anakin. The guilt ate you up for the longest time until you made peace with it, believing this was how your life was going to be from now on.

When Obi-Wan had broke the news that Anakin gone, you refused to believe him at first. You lived in denial for several months, drowning in your sorrow, and holding out hope that your husband would return to you one day.

There was one night, you had a dream of Anakin dying. The dream felt too real that you couldn't tell if it was the force telling you the veracious fate of Anakin. You searched your feelings, which only pushed you in believing that the Anakin you knew and loved ceased to exist. That same night, you made the decision to cut yourself off the force and try to leave your Jedi past behind.

-

Lightning flashed through the tall windows of the dimly-lit palace. The faint sound of thunder rumbling echoed throughout the night sky, masking the sound of Vader's heavy footsteps and breathing as he roamed the corridors. After a long day of touring the facilities and having to listen to Kairos at every minute of the day, Vader was ready to be done and meditate in his chambers. But before he could, Vader had to map out the palace, scanning the building to locate any secrets that may had any hidden passages, hiding any force-sensitive people.

After sending two probe droids and unit of stormtroopers to scan the exterior, Vader had made a beeline through every hallway and room he had encountered, making sure every crevasse of the interior of the palace was noted in his holomap.

When Vader had hit the throne room, the blue light emitted from his wrist, scanning over the objects and walls within the room. When the light had hit the large portrait of you and Kairos, Vader paused, analyzing the picture. Though the room was dimly lit from the lanterns on the wall, the flashes of lightning allowed Vader to take in the portrait clearly.

Vader studied you, his eyes scanning over your features. Your face didn't have any of the royal face paint on. Instead, your face bore little to no makeup, showing your true natural beauty. Vader furrowed his eyebrows as his eyes landed at the small scar on your right cheek. Vader couldn't tell if it was a doppelgänger, or that it was a coincidence that another woman in the space system happened to eerily look like you and have the exact scar on the cheek. He thought fate was playing with him.

"My Lord, we have just finished scanning the palace." The voice of one of his stormtroopers shook Vader out of his thoughts. A flash of lighting glared through the windows and on the portrait, as Vader took one last good look at image before leaving the room and into his chambers.

-

A week had passed since Vader made the decision to stay at the palace. You rarely saw him around at first, but he soon came around and would join you and Kairos for breakfast and dinner. Though he wouldn't eat anything and would just sit and watch you and Kairos eat in silence, perhaps it allowed him to come out of his shell, or just spy on you both.

The one thing you did notice, was how he took a liking to you, at least that's what you convinced yourself of. Whenever Vader was in the presence of both you and Kairos, you always felt like there were a pair of eyes watching you. When you would look back at him, he either continue to stare at you or avert his gaze.

Maybe you were going crazy, but you could still sense Vader's prying eyes on you before going to bed. Because of this, you had made sure to close and lock your balcony doors every night, but even then, you couldn't shake the feeling away that you were being watched.

There was one day you wanted to test the waters with Vader and mustered the courage to start a conversation with him.

"Lord Vader, I hope you are enjoying your stay with us." You stated, approaching the Sith Lord, who was gazing over the clashing waves of the ocean. Vader turned to look at you, surprised at your words.

"Your majesty, it would appear I am enjoying my stay here. It does feel great... To be here, where it is beautiful, and relaxing" He let out, turning to look back at the ocean. You raised your eyebrows, stunned at his response. You've heard Vader was often straightforward with his words, never did he find interest in engaging in intimate conversations, even with his own men.

"Well, I'm glad to hear that Lord Vad-"

"Vader. You can refer me as Vader m'lady. You need not use formalities when you address me, especially when we are alone together." He interrupted you, you were taken aback at his words, unsure what to say.

"Well, Vader. In that case, you can call me Y/N." You gave him a small smile. Anakin whipped his head at your words, his eyes widening under the mask. It was you, it has to be you, this has to be a twist of fate. Anakin's breath hitched in his throat at the revelation.

"Are you alright Vader?" Your tone became serious, noticing the sudden change in his demeanor. You unconsciously touched his well built bicep, a habit you had when expressing your concern. The sudden contact sent a surge of electricity through the both of you. Realizing your action, you pulled your arm back. Anakin on the other hand was disappointed when your hand was no longer on him. He felt that all the pieces missing to him have fallen in place when you touched him. The faint feeling of familiarity he felt when he had landed on Lianna, had become stronger by the moment when you had touched him.

"Oh would you look at that, it's almost time for supper, care to join us?" You cleared your throat, looking down at your pocket watch, quickly changing the subject matter. Vader couldn't refuse, he needed an excuse to be with you longer. He needed you to touch him again, or him to touch you, or something for him to feel that spark he had just felt.

"I...I would love that." He let out. You gave him a huge grin at his response.

A gesture that Vader would never do, he offered his arm to you, in hopes he that you'll ignite that spark in him again. You hooked your arm around his, as you both made your way to the dining hall.

To say that Vader was feeling conflicted at the moment was an understatement. Anakin began to feel that his heart was melting away the ice around it. The past two years, he had felt nothing but fear, pain, and suffering. All of sudden, you, you reminded him about this youthful self and his past, before he became a Sith.

Anakin knew he would have to bring you to the Emperor or have you killed, whether it by his hands or one of his inquisitors, but now he couldn't bring himself to do either. You were his, truly. You were his angel, his wife, and his Y/N. All of the visions he had of you dying were no longer true, there were fictitious. Anakin thought he had lost everyone he loved, but you remained.

-

"That was well delicious as always." Kairos said to one of the butlers, to which you nodded in agreement as the butlers took the plates away.

"It's getting late, we should head to bed honey." You spoke up, looking at Kairos, who nodded in agreement.

"Allow me to walk you to your room my dear." Kairos stood up from his seat, as did you. You roped your arm his as you turned to back at Vader who was seated across the table.

"Goodnight Lord Vader." You gave him a smile, before leaving the room with Kairos. The both of you strolled down the hallway in comfortable silence. Instead of walking into the direction of your private chambers, you both made your way out to the palace's lit up courtyard. Kairos stopped in his place, turning to face you, holding both of your hands in his.

"Y/N..." Kairos spoke up. You looked up to him curious at his strange behavior and sudden intimacy.

"What is it Kairos?" You asked.

"I've noticed our guest has taken a liking to you." He commented. You raise an eyebrow at his statement.

"I think you're reading into it too much Kairos." You turned away, walking back into the direction from where you had came from, not wanting to deal with whatever Kairos had to pick with you this time. However, Kairos grabbed a hold of your wrist, spinning you around to face him.

"Y/N, for once put your ego aside... I understand we may not get along and disagree on most things, but I do care about you... I trust you, but I don't trust Lord Vader. Don't think I haven't noticed his wandering eyes on you." You scoffed at his accusation, ripping your hand out his grasp.

"Are you hearing yourself Kairos? You seem jealous at Vader's closelesness to me. Perhaps-" Before you could finish your words, Kairos smashed his lips against yours. Your eyes widened as you shoved Kairos off, wiping yours lips in disgust.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?" You began to yell at him, never did you imagine Kairos to pull a fast one on you.

"I need you shut up and listen to me for once Y/N. I understand you may not like me, but Lord Vader is here for a reason." Kairos took a step closer to you, his hands holding yours arms that were resting to side. "You may not see it Y/N, but there is something about you that brought Vader here."

You took a step back from Kairos, letting the revelation hit you. Your jig was up, you realized you should have been more careful around Vader. You should have known better that your force signature was still lingering out there. You needed to get off this planet before Vader figured it out.

"I...I need to know. What exchange did you have with the Empire? What relation do you have with him?"

"I-I don't know Vader like that Kairos. I have no idea what you're trying to get at." Your voice trembled, failing to hide your sudden nervousness.

"I suppose, you don't have to tell me if you want to... However, I do think it's best you leave Lianna for sometime. Before something happens." Kairos' voice was softer now. He held your hands once again, his eyes boring into yours. "I'll make sure Chira comes along with you, I'll send you to a planet somewhere in the Outer Rim. The Empire and Lord Vader would not be able to track you as easily there."

"Thank you Kairos... Really, I mean it." You cupped his cheek, to which he closed his eyes and leaned his head into. Realizing what you needed to do and where you needed to go, you knew this would probably be the last time you would step foot on Lianna, at least for a long time. "I apologize for roping you into this.... I know we had our differences, but I did not mind being around you. Even if you were a pain in my ass."

Kairos chuckled at your words, amused at your humor during one of the few vulnerable moments shared between the both of you. You knew you couldn't bring yourself to love Kairos, despite being married. You felt your heart still belonged to Anakin, even when you convinced yourself that he was gone.

"Just know I did love you Y/N, but I knew your heart was somewhere else when I had choose you." You quirked an eyebrow at his words.

"Y-you knew? Why did you still choose me?"

"You were beautiful, and still are. In truth, I needed my father to get off my back, but I did feel alone for the longest time before meeting you." Kairos looked down, avoiding your gaze.

Your eyes soften at his state. Part of you believed that your relationship with Kairos could have worked out. You strongly believed that you could have been good friends at least, but you both were too occupied being enemies than wanting to get along.

"I won't keep you here any longer. I'll have a ship ready for you. Grab whatever you need. Chira and I will meet you by the landing pad." The sudden shift in Kairos' serious tone shook you out of your pondering.

"I'll be quick. Thank you once again Kairos." You gave a quick kiss on his cheek before breaking out into a run, making your way into your private chambers to grab your emergency bag that held your personal items.

-

part III-- the finale, coming soon!

[skyguytoast]

ANAKIN X F!READER (18+, oral sex female receiving)

Anakin closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, he savored the sultry scent of your passionate encounter, which still lingered in the air. He luxuriated in the sensation of having you so close, the way you surrendered to him completely, and how much you hungered for him. After a moment, he opens his eyes again, gently tucking a soft blonde lock behind his ear. 

"You're sticky..." He whispers, the corner of his lip curling into a mischievous smile, as his blue eyes, darkening with rekindled desire, trail down your thighs, his gaze drifting to the evidence of your shared  pleasure on your thighs.

"And whose fault is that?" you quip with a playful smile, your eyebrows wiggling suggestively.

Anakin grins, his hands moving to your waist, as he locks his gauze with yours. "Oh, you know..." he responds in a sultry tone, his voice sending delicious shivers down your spine.

His hands travel to the back of your thighs, and in one swift movement, he lifts you into his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist.

"We'll get you cleaned up," Anakin promises, his intense gaze making a shiver run through your body.

"Uhm" You hum lowly, letting Anakin carry you in his arms, he holds your body with one arm around your waist, while using the other to push everything on the table out of the way, some holomaps, which you should have been memorizing the coordinates for the next mission, the holopads, and even the lightsabers falling carelessly to the floor of the small study room in the Temple library, although neither of you seemed to notice. Not when Anakin was lying your naked body on the table, your garments long since discarded.

The table was the perfect height for what Anakin was about to do to you. He carefully placed you on the wooden surface, his hands finding the back of your thighs, spreading your legs in one fluid and firm movement.

He positions himself between them, standing above you as he puts his hands on your waist, his gaze trailing down the line of your body, his smile widening at the way you're already squirming before he even puts his hands on you.

"I'll take care of you..." He murmurs, in a low, husky tone.

"Uhm, aftercare, huh? Someone's caring today," you murmured softly, before biting your lower lip when Anakin threw one of your legs over his shoulder without warning.

Anakin chuckled softly as he placed his hand on your calf, his hands gently trailing down the back of your leg as he placed a small kiss on the back of your knee.

"I'm always caring for you..."

He replies, before placing a kiss on the inside of your leg, while his other hand is still resting on your waist, gently caressing the skin there.

"uhm, you fucked me in a moving speeder once, that wasn't very considerate of you" You reminded him, reminiscing about the moment, your lips curving with delight as you recalled the wind in your hair, the flashing lights of Coruscant's underworld, and the horrified stares of some, and the disdain of those who were used to that kind of display of affection, - there were more indiscreet couples than you when it came to lovemaking.

Anakin grinned, his warm breath tickling the inside of your thigh, as he placed another kiss, his hand gently trailing down the back of your thigh as he placed a small nibble near the fold of your leg.

"Oh, you can't complain about that time. You loved it." He retorted in a devious tone, as his tongue brushed over the sensitive skin for a moment.

"Maybe you have a point there..." You ponder, taking a deep breath to try and keep your heartbeat normal, although it seems almost impossible.

A hoarse laugh escapes Anakin's throat as he brings his hand up to your hip again, he places another smooch on the back of your thigh, this time very close to your cunt.

"I always have, my love..." He replies in a low tone, as his kiss warms your skin for a while longer, before he slips his tongue between your legs.

"Don't get cocky, Anakin," you retort, although your complaint falls on deaf ears as his tongue slides through your heat.

You feel Anakin smile against your soaking wet pussy, he takes his tongue to the sensitive spot that he knows makes you see stars, he begins to explore you with gentle movements.

He places his hand on the underside of your leg as he moves his tongue down, his mouth exploring you slowly as he enjoys the feel and taste of you. You throw your head back, your hair spilling over the table, your fingers tangling in his locks, pushing his face deeper as his tongue deliberately rubs against your clitoris.

Anakin draws his face away for a moment, receiving a little moan of frustration from you, before running his tongue around your entrance again, he puts his free hand on your waist to try to hold you in place, starting to tease you with gentle movements as he slowly eats you out. He lifts his head just a little to look at you, watching the expression of bliss on your face as he tries to get more sounds out of you, your breasts hardening with pleasure and the icy air cutting through the room.

"uhm, I must admit you know how to use your mouth, darling" You gasp, kneading your breasts sensuously, adding more fusion to the sexual equation.

Anakin presses another kiss to your lower lips as he lets out a low hoarse chuckle, his tongue running slowly over the area for a moment as he enjoys the deliciously depraved sounds you let out.

"Obviously, darling..." He replies in a wicked tone as he sticks his tongue out at you again, starting to speed up his thrusts as he tries to bring you to the edge again, he wants to feel you melting on his tongue.

"Cocky bastard!" you whimper, your thighs clenching involuntarily.

A small moan of pleasure escapes Anakin with your passionate move, his long fingers closing on your thigh, preventing you from pressing your legs together. He rolls his tongue around in you again, speeding up his rhythm, trying to give you as much pleasure as he can.

"You know you love it, love..." He whispers between tongue thrusts, his hand remaining on your thigh to try and keep you open for him.

"Fuck, I'm going to..., uhm" You moan wilfully, the pleasure clouding your mind to the point where you forget that you're not alone, and Obi Wan is still looking for some archives in the next room.

When Anakin hears the loud moan, he puts his hand over your mouth to try and muffle the sound while speeding up the movements of his tongue.

"Shh, love... we don't want Obi Wan to know about this..."

He murmurs in a low tone as he continues to deliberately lick and suck your clitoris, trying to keep a steady rhythm while seeming more amused than concerned about the pleasurable moans escaping from you.

You squeeze your eyes shut tightly, trying to stop yourself from whimpering, tears of pleasure running down your flushed cheeks as Anakin hits the sweet spot again and again, he plunges his tongue into your ocean like a thirsty man, drinking you like holy water.

When he realizes that you're almost at your limit, he intensifies the thrusts of his tongue, rubbing his thumb over your clitoris and applying a little pressure, trying to give you as much pleasure as possible.

"Don't try to hold back, love... Just let me take care of you..." He murmurs sultrily against your cunt, Anakin savoring the sight in front of him, his eyes roaming over your arched body as you inch closer to the edge.

It doesn't take long for you to melt into his mouth, your legs going limp as you reach your orgasm, your knuckles white from clenching the wood of the table to stop yourself from moaning.

Anakin stays in this position for a while longer, his tongue tracing your cunt, licking your juices, trying to collect every trace of your release, he almost hums as he indulges in the taste he knows so well.

After a few moments, when your breathing has seemed to calm down, he places one last kiss on your core before drawing away, a pleased look on his face, rubbing lazy circles on your hips.

"So good for me..."

You give an amused chuckle, pushing a couple of blonde strands away from his face, gently pulling Anakin closer. He hovers over you with a hug next to your body for support, you press your lips to his, your tongue slipping into his mouth, dancing in tune and tasting your own taste on his tongue.

[dearanakin]

trust you | anakin skywalker: episode VIII

Summary: Anakin gets dragged into a mission with Poe Dameron, while something unexpected happens at the Jedi Temple, where you and the others face the incoming threat. (don't forget I use characters from different timelines)

Warnings: mentions of blood, vulgar language

Word count: 3.2k

previous chapter | read on Wattpad

--

Anakin:

I was on a mission with freaking Poe Dameron. I would like to think I haven't lowered my standards when it comes to the assignments I usually do, because this one sure fucking isn't it. But I was literally dragged to do this with him, it wasn't the first time either, so I know what he was on about. I didn't have a choice matter-of-factly, because I refused too many times the past two days, but he just made me come with him saying he needed my assistance. He also made me wear a stupid helmet, but I reassured my decision and disagreed. 

He works with the fucking Resistance, what does he need me for? He flies a T-70 X-wing starfighter, which is high key superior to my Eta-2 Actis-class. He knows many attack techniques, and he also has an entire group with him flying around. 

Poe was using his comlink to communicate with his partners as we reached closer to find the First Order's headquarters. It reminded me badly of the Emperor, but I tried to suck up the feeling of rage inside of me. It's been years already, what is done is done. 

While the man next to me focused on his own mission, I thought back to two days ago, when I met (Y/N) in the coffee room. I honestly didn't expect to meet anyone there, hence why I decided to get a drink in the middle of the night. It caught me off guard seeing her after what had happened the last time we were together, which made me feel completely flimsy being close to her. 

And it pissed me off that she thought it would be a good idea to bring his lightsaber up after everything he had done before he left me behind. I didn't regret breaking that stupid piece of shit of grip, I should've done that the first time I came across it when she had it in her hands. It drives me insane the way she just trusts everyone she meets, without even realizing how much they can harm people. And worse than that, trusting Obi-Wan fucking Kenobi. 

I can't trust anyone after everything I've been through, after I've been left behind from my former Master. Most importantly, I trusted Palpatine's words that he could help me save Padmé, and he betrayed me as well. My issues all lie around the ones I devoted my life to. 

Dameron snaps me out of my distraction when he finally speaks up to me, handing me a blaster gun. I rolled my eyes, thinking he definitely believes I would need a blaster gun when I have my lightsaber. 

"We're moving forward to attack them, assault their army and gather intel" He removes his helmet, which has features of the Resistance's symbol mixed with a red and black design. 

"Jesus, Dameron. You guys know what you're dealing with, right?" I try to stand on my ground and not stick my nose where it wasn't my issue. Obviously, my body was probably going to boil from all the control I'm holding back. 

"Yes, Sherlock? We've been here before, but we couldn't find them" Poe moves his head to the sides, looking for a hidden place to land, which was pretty nonexistent. 

Why the fuck did he call me Sherlock?

"You couldn't find them" I laughed in disbelief. He truly believes it's that easy to fight against the First Order. "Can you imagine what they're capable of if they find us first?"

He seemed to ponder for a moment, but gave me a reassuring smirk before unbuckling his belt. I did nothing but huff in annoyance over his shitty idea. I was going to help him and his trope, but only because he made me come, and I owe him as well. 

"I've led attacks and been to many before, and they were all terrible people. This is no different" Poe tried to convince me he would make it out of here. Again, my trust issues aren't really helping me here. 

"Yeah, but they weren't Snoke" I muttered and he shot his head back at me quickly, surprised with my words "I can sense the motherfucker from miles" 

We stay glancing at each other for what feels like several minutes, only then he took in what was really happening and how much he was willing to risk himself and his group in a suicide mission. Because that's what it really is when it comes to Snoke. The artificial humanoid was as powerful as Palpatine. 

"You're telling me you made me bring you into this shit show and didn't tell me who we're dealing with?" He raised his voice, almost squeaking with desperation, and I furrowed my brows. 

I shake my head, not exactly catching on what he's saying. "You didn't fucking know we were literally walking into death?"

"I thought we were fighting off Stormtroopers?"

He's really unbelievable. If I wasn't here, he would be dead by now. Poe would've been sliced into a million pieces and would've taken his entire group down with him. 

"Poe! For God's sake, do you ever think before you go on these missions?" I can't even begin to tell how much I'm frustrated with him and his lack of self consciousness. "This is the fucking Supremacy headquarters, it's literally his lair!"

He became desperate and started to communicate through his comlink, letting the others know what we were really getting ourselves into. I swear to God this is why I don't trust people at all. I should've known better than to just follow Poe into the assignments he finds. This is beyond crazy of him. 

I decided to take over the yoke of his ship and maneuver it until we start to lift off the ground, swinging it. The moment we started to leave, the stormtroopers finally made their appearance and started shooting at us. 

It was really hard to find the right setting for the attack, but I managed to hit the defense laser cannon, trying to blast them and take them down. Poe was in a mix of trying to warn everyone, while he shoved my hands off the yoke. 

"You're gonna get us fucking killed!" He screamed before taking control and flying up, far enough to hit the men on the ground.

"You're the one to talk!" I yelled back at him, looking out the window to realize his teammates were still taking off and struggling to fight back. My senses heightened when I felt something really disturbing ring in my head. 

At first, it was confusing because it came all at once. The high-pitched noise started to pound in my head and when I looked back at the headquarters, I noticed Snoke coming out of the Supremacy, walking slowly to the edge of the place. He was staring at us, but didn't move a finger. 

"Pull the lightspeed gear!" I shouted at Poe, startling him. He looked at me and creased his brows. "Do it now!"

He didn't question my demand, pulling the gear immediately and we crossed the galaxy in a matter of seconds. He looked over his shoulder to get a glance behind us, to see if his teammates were right after us. I unknowingly heaved out a sigh, listening to Dameron do the same next to me when we noticed their ships behind us. 

Still, the vertigo and the ringing in my head hit back, and I looked over the transceiver on his  control panel. There was a hissing noise and a faint voice on the other side, speaking words we couldn't understand. He managed to spin a few buttons, trying to tune it in so it became clear. 

"Code nine thirteen! Nine, one three!" The other voice spoke, and we both looked at each other at the same time. It's an emergency code. 

Was that Cal Kestis? My blood ran cold, and I felt a shiver down my spine, and my limbs became numb. I watched as Poe took the lead and gripped the transceiver speaker and spoke to him, I was utterly shocked and couldn't say a word. I started to zone out, thinking about Luke and our groups of people. Even (Y/N) came into my mind. 

"It's the General Grievous' army! We are under attack! Where the hell are you guys?" His voice came rather desperate, like he couldn't fathom what was really happening. 

"We're coming, landing is in a few seconds!" Poe sped up and quickly we were near the Temple. 

"Luke, is he okay? How bad is it?" I was still under a daze, my eyes roaming around the place looking for something dreadful happening down there.I start to unbuckle myself as soon as Poe lands the ship, barely waiting for him to open the doors and I immediately sprint off the hallway of the Temple looking for my son.

From the corner of my eye I noticed Cal hitting his lightsaber incessantly against the army of droids, his face covered in dried blood. He shot me a knowing look when I came over to where he was and assisted him with my weapon.

"Where is Luke?" I hear my strangling voice ask him as we managed to keep ourselves shielded from them. He didn't answer and I raised my tone at him "Where the hell is my kid?"

"He's hiding with (Y/N), she took him!"

"Where?" My hands were swinging the lightsaber as fast as they could, even though I could feel them trembling.

"I don't fucking know- ah!" He grunted and I looked over at him.

One of the droids slashed their sword against his upper arm, ripping a pained groan out of him. I kicked it off and shoved mine against them, beating it into pieces. Kestis watches me with wide eyes and nods when I face him back.

I rush out of the hallway, running aimlessly. I needed to figure out a way of getting to Luke, but I had to think about where she would hide with him in the first place. And I had no idea, given that I still don't know much about her. So I tried the only thing I have to my advantage. I focused my senses and shut down the background noise. A few seconds later, I gathered a few whispering down the other end of the Temple.

My hands were shaking really badly, I thought I was going to pass out from the distress. It was agonizing not knowing where he was and if he was ok. I walked slowly through each closed door, until I could hear shuffling against the smaller one. It could barely fit two people in there. Usually they use force shields so any other force sensitive people wouldn't get ahold of it, but I've worked on mine for so long it can literally overreach it.

"Luke! Are you in there?" I ask, resting my hand over the door knob while leaning my ear against the door. There's still faint noises on the other side. It was faint, but I could hear them. "It's me, it's dad"

"Don't open the door, Luke. It could be a changeling" She whispers to him.

"But I know it's my dad. I can feel it" Luke whispers back, leaning against the door. I can feel his energy dissipating through the room.

"It's me Luke. It's not a changeling, I'm right here!" I try to whisper to him as well, maybe he will sense it too.

For a brief second, he mentioned opening the door but (Y/N) caught him in the middle of it. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"No, young boy. Did your father not tell you to not trust anyone?" Her words hit me hard like a brick.

I know I've been clear about that, but it felt too weird to be on the other side of the story this time. She knows how I feel about trusting people, (Y/N) is trying to keep him safe using my own advice.

Again, he shuffled on the other side and I felt his body moving further away from the door. This time, she was standing against it.

"Stay back, and hold onto me" She asked in a low tone and slowly turned the doorknob.

I didn't wait until she opened fully, making myself step into the tiny room as I felt a whip of laser coming inches across from my face. She really needs to start practicing her freaking aiming. I watch as she holds tightly to the blaster gun and sighs in relief when she notices it's just me.

I kneel down and hold Luke tightly against me, resting my chin over his small shoulder. His arms cross around my neck and he holds me back with urge.

"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" I ask in a rush and feel my hands pull him tighter, almost merging our bodies together. He mumbles a "no" and clings to me.

I have to be faster if I want to get ourselves out of there alive and in pieces. I hold him up and place both of his legs around my waist, looking back at (Y/N) who watches the closed door, apprehensive.

She looks back at me for a slight second, nodding before preparing herself to walk out of the room.

"Thank you" I mumble almost silently when I stare back at her, both of us getting in position.

We ran across the hallway looking for any kind of cover, while I used my free hand to deflect the blasts and hit them where I could. Whereas (Y/N) attempts to aim and shoot them, miserably failing at it. But at least she's trying. I get to one of the giant metal doors that leads us to the underground, where we keep gears and machines running. There isn't really a path to follow under there, giving us time to reach outside the hangar.

We are met with a couple of battle droids, reaching out to them with Luke still on my hold, while he keeps his head low on my neck and his arms still around my body. I take a sharp inhale and decide to pass him over to her. I have to do it fast otherwise I'll regret it. She darts her eyes at me with furrowed brows and a concerned look, but still does so.

She realizes what I'm on to when I grasp the blaster out of her hand and start to shoot them while using my lightsaber at the same time. The spinning helps me get through the blasts, giving me advantage when I finally beat them down. But there are screaming and rumbling on the other side of the hangar, our teammates fighting them off as well as trying to get rid of their attack.

I step forward trying to figure out a way of getting them down quicker, but my plans get interrupted when something blows them up into flames. My mouth hangs open when I snap my head to the left and watch a ship as it fires off another laser cannon over them.

We all watch as whoever is in charge starts to get off, turning the aircraft around and speeding up in seconds. When I look back to the blown up droids, I notice they took down each one of them and the screaming has finally stopped.

We were safe. Whatever that was, they saved us.

From the distance, I see Poe and Cal running towards us. The redhead seems to be a little beaten but could still stand up, even though his face was covered in small cuts and splits, which was manageable. The pilot, on the other hand, kept holding his side, while his head was wrapped in cloth. You could still see fresh blood spreading against it.

"Holy shit" Poe was out of breath, he dropped all his weight over my shoulder where he kept his hand rested on. "Holy shit"

Holy shit indeed. I should tell him this battle is still nothing compared to what he was about to do.

I snake an arm under his body and lift him up, supporting him while we walk slowly. Louise walks past me still carrying Luke as she carefully uses her free hand to rest on Cal's face.

"Jesus, Cal. Are you okay?" She asks him, concerned about his injuries even though he gives her a nod.

Her thumb ghosts over his cheek, and he holds her hand with both of his, squeezing it. Kestis gives her a sided hug, ruffling Luke's hair.

"Ow, ow, ow!" Poe grunts next to me and I give him a quick look.

"What is it?"

"I don't know, I sense something... weird" He murmurs, using my shoulder for support. "I think it's jealousy"

"What the fuck, Poe?" The pilot is holding a cheeky grin on his face, and I feel my jaw clenching.

"Is that even an emotion you have? Is it possible?" He asks and I dig my mechanic fingers into his shoulder blade. "Ow! Ow! Okay, I'm sorry!"

"Shut up, before I change my mind and feed you to the Ewoks" I hear him chuckling, even though he's definitely in pain.

"Ewoks and Wookies love me, you're gonna have to try harder" Poe muttered.

I swat my hand over his head carefully, not wanting to hurt him even more than I wish I could. "I'll handle you to the fucking First Order next time"

He opens his mouth with an offended look and I display a victorious smirk at him.

There are dozens of injured people at the medical bay, it's definitely going to be a difficult job for all the medics, we were probably going to have to ask for a backup. Both him and Cal get assisted, while we watch them leave our sight. I feel Luke's small hands grab my neck, pulling himself against my body once again.

I shift his weight and whisper him some comforting words. He was really disturbed and I feel bad he had to live this shit. From the corner of my eye, I see (Y/N) trying to get rid of the dried blood from her trembling hands. I reach over and hold her wrist gently as she looks over me with a confused look.

Yes, I hate her sometimes, and she annoys me a lot. But I need to be friendly over the situation.

"We're fine, we're safe now" I speak through a comforting tone and she nods.

"Wasn't prepared for all of this" She tries to keep her head up, but her lips form into a thin line and I know she's in shock.

"I know, we never really are" My flesh hand gives her a reassurance squeeze and I feel my skin burn.

I can't handle the touch. I mean, I can handle touching my son. But when it comes to a woman, I just can't. It still reminds me of her. I jolt it back and try to cover up my reaction. Poe fucking ruined it for me. How can I be jealous of her if we can barely stand each other? This is probably a nonsense statement.

She doesn't say another word, holding her body with affliction.

I clear my throat before I choke out another "thank you". She glances up at me again, this time surprise washed over her face. "Thank you for taking care of him when I wasn't here. And for reminding him about trust"

This is a bit of a big deal to me. As much as I try to keep my distance from her, she keeps being pulled back like a damn magnet. I force myself to stay away from her but things always take a turn and we're once again facing each other. It gives me anxiety, and it's not a good one. If there's even a good kind of anxiety. It makes me feel like I'm taking many steps back after struggling with my reality.

I don't deserve someone in my life anymore, except Luke. All I did was hurt the people I love the most, and if I can keep them alive I can't allow myself to be too close to them. I mean, all of them. I don't want to be a friend for Cal, or Poe. I don't want to be a friend for (Y/N) either. This was an exception, she had to do it because I wasn't there for him. But I won't let it happen again.

And what happened today at the Temple was my fault. Whoever got killed or injured, it was because of me. It was because I still go after those who hurt me before. And General Grievous won't stop until he gets to me. I need to work on getting to him first before it's too late for me. I have to do this alone, this is my fight. I won't have anyone's blood in my hands anymore.

Only my own.

@adorbzliz @himesuedi @kingdomhate @cl0esblogg @littlecoffeenerd @readingthingsonhere @js-favnanadoongi @twilightzone24

[magnusbae]

Hi! What about "Can you stay with me?" (and if you'd like it my bonus prompt is "drunk") 💗

The initial draft was written while I was quite literally fainting late at night & the second one fully rewritten while I am dazed and out of it. I would say that I was method writing Obi-Wan who is indeed very much drunk in this one, dearest anon. Thank you for the prompt~ 😊💖

+++

Obikin || 4,004w || Drunk Obi-Wan is agonized by the prospect of his freshly knighted Padawan leaving him behind— and more. 😌 Some flavors of gentle lime in this drink, very light, very sweet. 🍋💖

▾▾▾

"Can you stay with me?"

Obi-Wan Kenobi sounds properly pathetic and he knows it. Grasping at Anakin’s Tabards as he is, mind swirling in hazy circles around the notion he was doing his very best to avoid thinking about for the past few months. It is not long now that Anakin would look at his Master and see him for what he really was. Perhaps even today. Inebriated as he is, he makes for a good serving of disillusionment. All Anakin needs to do is look, and see, and then…

It seems inevitable—his Padawan will leave.

Former Padawan. Anakin is no longer his Padawan, and that is the heart of it, isn’t it? The severed braid was the firs step. Them having each a battalion of their own, stationed light years away from each other with only the occasional joint mission, a second. The third and final step would be for Anakin to finally open his eyes and look, and see.

It won’t be hard to unveil the carefully crafted Jedi Master facade Obi-Wan had cultivated for the past decade. No, it won’t be hard at all. If Anakin were to stop glorifying him, stop shaping him to be what ever form of idol he had needed for while growing up, if only he were to take an unbiased look at him…

There will no longer be, Kenobi and Skywalker.

For the naked truth was, Anakin had outgrown him, had become more powerful and capable than his Master. There’s little left that Obi-Wan could still offer, still teach. He should be proud. The only one still refusing to see it, is Anakin himself. Once that revelation comes to pass however, it will be complete. A true break, as befitting the Jedi way. Obi-Wan finds no peace in the thought, no completion nor satisfaction in the successful completion of his Padawan’s training—a symbol of his own Mastery.

Not when it means losing him. Not then.

Given his state of drunkenness, words slurred and feet unsteady, he thinks that it’s worth putting to question whatever or not he was a good Jedi at all, least of all a Master. Try as he might, he finds it hard to ponder further. His choice to look inward is as always an avoidance, an escape. An easy detour from looking outward, from looking at Anakin. Anakin who’s eyes he can feel like a physical touch, boring into his very soul.

Obi-Wan’s avoidance is nearly as strong as Anakin’s natural magnetism. One is counseling him to avoid looking, save himself the pain of witnessing the exact moment in which the realization dawns upon the boy. The second, stronger still, demands his undivided attention on him, demands him to look. Demands him. 

Obi-Wan looks up, he meets those eyes, his demise.

Anakin’s eyes widen and he blinks, endless blue clearing as if coming out of some sort of shock.

“Can I—” Anakin splutters “—Obi-Wan, even if the council explicitly ordered me to go save the entire karkin universe just now, I wouldn’t be leaving your side— stars you’ve any idea what you look like right now?

Obi-Wan’s tongue is heavy but he parts his lips to answer, something clever to be sure, he always finds something to say.

“No, never mind.” Anakin cuts in before he could speak. There’s such decisiveness in his tone, such confidence. His former Padawan stands tall, his arms are strong and sure as he handles Obi-Wan closer, making him lean more of his weight against his chest. It’s broad and firm. Obi-Wan should not be noticing those things, should not be aware of those things. It is a further evidence that his Padawan is well and truly grown. Further evidence of his own failing as a Jedi, as a Master, as a…man. Obi-Wan should not be inhaling and smelling home. Should not be leaning closer, itching all over for more, more.

“You’re so wasted that I am surprised you’ve even recognized me at all.” Anakin continues talking, as if the universe is not shifting beneath Obi-Wan’s feet as it is him who finally looks with his gaze unbiased. “The drunken messages though, those you will be seeing tomorrow” there’s dark mirth in that dear voice. “I bet you wanted to send them to— someone else.” Anakin glances at him, eyes narrowed.

Obi-Wan’s offenses at Anakin’s assumption he could ever not recognize him dies over under his gaze, dark and rich, his eyes are captivating. Before Anakin, he did not know that a blue can hold such multitudes. Both the clear morning sky, and the moon lit sky. Beautiful. They loosens his tongue as well as any truth serum would. That or the bottle he had finished on his own finally soaked through.

“I will always—”  His voice comes out so thick that he coughs, starting Anakin from his dark contemplations, whichever those might be. His eyebrows furrow and he quickly snatches a cup of something clear off of a passing robo-waitress’s tray. Irritated with the distraction, Obi-Wan accepts it and drinks if only to make way for the words to follow. He will not let it go. Not now that he’d started. “I will always recognize you, Padawan Mine, drugged, beaten, or otherwise preoccupied— I will always—” “Drugged?!” Anakin cuts in again, arms tightening around Obi-Wan and strangling the annoyed huff at being cut again “You did not mention anything about being drugged, what the kark’ Obi-Wan?!”

Obi-Wan’s mouth is dry, similar to how being drugged would feel. His mind swims and all he sees is Anakin. There’s warmth in his chest, there’s a burn in his gut, there’s a tug in his— 

“It’s hard to tell” he says sheepishly, embarrassed, eyes straying away from Anakin’s strong jaw and up, up to the lights on the ceiling. He should not be thinking of how Anakin’s proximity is enough to replicate a strong drug. How out of orbit he feels around him as of late. “They all start the same, so…” 

Anakin is hardly listening. Instead he is surveying the club with a look of fury that is bordering on homicidal, freeing one hand to rest it on his lightsaber. There’s the distinct feeling of Anakin stretching his force signature out, covering the room, no doubt attempting to locate anyone within their proximity who might have dared drug his former Master. Oh if only he knew that he was the culprit all along. 

Obi-Wan snorts, finding an odd sense of humor in it.

Anakin’s gaze darts back to him, sharp and accusing. He looks so handsome under the colorful, dim lights. He looks so… 

“Ah-nakin.” Obi-Wan sighs out and shuts his eyes lest his spinning head forces him to sober up in the most un-jedi manner.  

“Stay with me,” the request comes so easy, what was it that he was so afraid of? It’s so easy, too easy. Frighteningly so, to reach and touch Anakin’s forearm. There’s skin beneath his touch, warm and human, tense muscles beneath. “Ah” Obi-Wan sighs out in realization. Anakin had rolled the sleeves, so very unofficial for a Jedi and yet so very Anakin of him.

Master Windu would have hated it. It wouldn’t surprise Obi-Wan if this was exact reason why Anakin did it to begin with, after all, he was most adept to handling heat and was not bothered by it even while all else were. Obi-Wan really should have reprimanded the boy more often, should have stopped Anakin from executing all those harmless little vendettas of his while growing up.

If only he did not find them to be so endearing, so amusing. If only he was a better Master, a proper Master. He would have. 

His brain is foggy and he had already forgotten what was it it that he had hoped to achieve by touching Anakin, only that his fingers are circling his wrist and touching the spot at which he can feel his life pulsing. What a terrible habit it is, being intoxicated while negotiating. You should only ever drink enough to appear drunk, never more. How is he to get what he wants, when he has no ideas what it was? 

Obi-Wan’s eyelids are heavy when he tries to blink them open and focus on Anakin. There’s the signature frown, so familiar Obi-Wan can’t help but smile. Anakin is chewing his lips, a compulsion he had never managed to rid himself of. He looks torn between the need to locate and deal with the ‘enemy’, and…. Obi-Wan. 

The way Anakin looks, that should not be reminiscent of the targets Obi-Wan opts for charm as the main form of negotiation with. Should not stir the excitement of a hunt, of a game to be won. Obi-Wan should not use his looks to achieve his goals, he should not use them to get what he wants, he should be a better man than that.

Obi-wan is not a better man. 

Licking his own dry lips, he let’s go off of Anakin’s wrist and reaches for Anakin’s cheeks. There’s a tremble in the touch, his, Anakin’s? He is not certain. 

“Dear One, you can chase your enemies tomorrow.” He speaks in a hushed murmur, he hopes he sounds soft and alluring “Tonight, will you guard this drunk Master of yours?” he looks up, through his lashes, breathing shallowly, feeling hot, hot, hot all over. 

Anakin let’s go off of the lightsaber. It’s an answer enough to what he had picked. It still is deeply gratifying to feel the boy’s hand cover his own, guide it until he wraps his arm around Anakin’s shoulders. It’s an awkward angle, with Anakin being taller than he— he cares very little for it when Anakin wraps an arm around his waist. 

“Let’s go.” He is tight lipped and determined, guiding Obi-Wan out and into a speeder that is parked not far off. If Obi-Wan was even slightly more aware, he’d realize just how much attention the pair of them had draw, how all of the eyes had followed them out. Sometimes he forgets, how famous they had become during this accursed war. Sometimes, he is glad to not remember. 

Anakin is terribly efficient at getting them to the Temple. One blink of an eye they’re flying through the busy highways of Coruscant, the next he is tossed unceremoniously onto a bed that feels and smells familiar. His bed.

They’re in his quarters. Their quarters until very recently. He is breathing harder and he does not dare to think of why. If he does not think, it does not exist. He is self aware enough only to feel how disheveled his robes feel on his body, how messy his hair is, how hot his skin feels all over. He is a mess. 

“Dear one?” he questions. He refuses to acknowledge how his own tone drops, refuses to admit he is rolling his vowels in a way he knows thickens his accent in the most attractive of ways. He doesn’t know why he is flirting with Anakin Skywalker when the boy is barely out of his knighthood and is Anakin. His Anakin, his Anakin on whom he just looked in a way he really should not be looking at, through his eyelashes, with a heavy, wanting gaze. 

The redness of Anakin’s cheeks is evidence enough that he hears and understands the situation well enough. That he is very much aware of what his Master is doing. That he is… perhaps affected. 

Obi-Wan swallows, trying to push himself up to his elbows. He needs to sober up, he must tell him that he is merely jesting, that it is all a little tease, a little laugh, nothing more, just….

Anakin cuts him to it. Before he can excuse, or joke, or explain.

“Not while you’re drunk.” Anakin bites, sounding frustrated, lips swollen red from biting. Obi-Wan startles, surprised. 

What did Anakin just say? Imply?

Blatantly threw straight into his face, more like. 

Yes, but not while he is drunk.

Absurdly, a swell of pride fills his chest to the brim. Anakin’s manners and chivalry surprises him, pleases him. He had raised him well after all, he did not fail him, at least not in this.

His pleasure must bleed into the Force as Anakin regards him with a dark, baffled look. It’s so dark, most would find it intimidating, but for Obi-Wan it’s… dear. He can see the gentleness in that look, the care. There’s warmth in the force when Anakin insist on tucking him in, fingers methodical in the short, careful gestures. Tucking him in as if he was a child. Him, his Master. Former. 

Obi-Wan was tucked in only once in his lifetime, at least as far as he can remember. His first night in the Jedi Temple. So tense he was, so out of his depth, that the he was taken pity of, tucked in with a quiet promise of everything making sense soon. It helped.

It had never happen again. 

“Ahnakin.” he tries to protest, tries to pull a face of offended indigence. It’s hard to do when he is practically shining within the force. A single look from his apprentice is enough to quiet him down. 

“Master.” Anakin replies, and there’s a little eyeroll there. His cheeks are still flushed but he seems as determined as Obi-Wan to not address the Bantha in the room. “You really should be more careful” he lectures him in a way Obi-Wan can distinctly remember doing a few years back, when Anakin had gotten drunk for the first time. 

He leaves then, without a word. Obi-Wan’s throat closes and there’s a pang of pain in his heart. No this. He remembers now. Him. Leaving. That was the whole reason, that was why—

“Master?” Anakin sounds concerned, a glass of water and a container of what looks to be painkillers in his hands. “Are you sick?” a few strides and he is by Obi-Wan’s bed again, placing he glass and container at the bedside table. He looks well and truly worried. 

Unthinking, Obi-Wan sits up. So sudden that he does feel sick from the motion. He ignores it. He reaches for Anakin’s face with both hands, cupping his cheeks with a grip that is too strong, too desperate. A Jedi should not hold onto things with such fervor. 

All it takes for him to lean is to Anakin, is to stop resisting if only for a moment. Anakin’s pull was always there, stronger and stronger until it had become a daily challenge to ignore it, to pretend he does not feel it. All it takes is to stop resisting and his lips find Anakin’s, pressing against that plush softness, inhaling his exhale and finally, finally feeling anchored, inside the orbit he was always meant to circle.

He tilts his chin, leans in, knowing his beard will scratch pleasantly against the smooth jaw, kisses in deeper—

“Mahster—!” Anakin gasps into the kiss, a pang of shock and uncertainty clouding the force around them, sipping through the open nerves of their broken bond.  He does not want to take advantage of his Master, does not want him to end up hating him, does not want him to wake up and be disgusted, appalled— but he wants, he wants so badly. 

“Oh, Anakin.” Obi-Wan breathes out, unsure if it’s endearment of relief that fills him up with warmth, with lightness. One thing he is certain of, no one had ever been, or will be, as sweet, as kind, as dear as Anakin is to him. “I could never hate him.” There’s a drunken lisp to his voice, he needs a moment to correct himself. “You.” He manages, meeting Anakin’s eyes and not blinking, not wanting to miss a single moment. Wanting to see the exact moment in which Anakin realizes he is serious, that he is the most honest he’s been in years. 

Anakin seems to be realizing it too, his eyes widening and cheeks coloring a deeper red than before, he bites his lip.

“I might be…” Obi-Wan’s gaze drops to Anakin’s lips and he thinks about… “intoxicated…” he forces himself to look up, away from temptation, away from sin. “Drugged, possibly.” He is still not fully certain if he is, or it truly is just Anakin with a touch of alcohol. “But I am very much aware that…” he smiles before completing the sentence, it widens so much further with the words to come “…my Padawan simply cannot take advantage of his Master…” there’s really no need to be using this many terms of belonging, especially when they are outdated and irrelevant, but he just cannot… “On the contrary, I am the one who should be deeply ashamed for…mnnn-” 

Anakin’s lips quiet him up, he was never a patient listener, never could hear his Master finish a thought. This is the most effective he had ever been at cutting Obi-Wan’s line of thought, by far. He kisses him in a way Obi-Wan would have never guessed him capable of— it’s soft, sweet, patient. A tender thing, careful, loving. Obi-Wan gasps. Thinking, dazedly of how Anakin will grow to be an amazing lover, so attentive, a beast holding back his fangs in favor of gentle lips… 

The thought sets a burning coil of arousal deep in Obi-Wan’s gut.

Not good. Beyond not good. He should…. 

The thought is present and yet he licks at Anakin’s lips, asking for permission. He is granted one without resistance, without hesitance. Anakin’s lips part and he can taste him and oh, oh. Obi-Wan groans, muscles tensing as he shifts to sit straighter, moving a hand to Anakin’s nape and pulling him closer.

He nearly chokes when the boy sucks on his tongue, arousal shocking him into near soberness. 

“Anakin…” he knows, there’s not enough alcohol in the universe to convince him that this is not going too far, he knows and yet… 

He kisses Anakin again, a little hungrier, a little more wanting.

He must stop this madness. To think that he had started it, to think that he had taken advantage of his trusting, sweet—

“No, Master.” Anakin answers, and Obi-Wan wonders just how much of his shields is truly left if his thoughts can be read so easily, so plainly. “You’ve asked me to stay, and I will stay.” That assuredness is back, firm and leaving no space for argument. This is the same man who leads men on a battlefield, who commands, who leads. Obi-Wan finds it impossibly, undeniably, devastatingly attractive.

“You will sleep.” Anakin decides then, tearing his eyes away from Obi-Wan long enough to gesture at the lights, turning them off with the force. “And I will stay with you.” His eyes land back to Obi-Wan, dark mirth dancing in what Obi-Wan can still see of him. “To keep you safe, Master.” He is teasing him, the little devil.

“How will it even…” Obi-Wan doesn’t want to mention how narrow the bed really is, Anakin would know, with his constant complaints about how leg room and… 

“Don’t worry about that.” Anakin answers, confidence so cocky, so boyish that Obi-Wan huffs a surprised laughter, breaking into giggling when Anakin practically falls on top of him. They struggle like that, laughter mixing, limbs tangling, hair in a mouth and fingers against sides— Anakin captures him then, they’re on their sides, Anakin’s back is firm as he pulls Obi-Wan all the way to himself, forming….

“Absolutely not!” Obi-Wan’s voice raises and breaks a little, attempting to wriggle out of the trap he inadvertently fell into. There’s still some pride life in him. He will not permit this Jedi Knight, his former Padawan no less, big spoon him, 16 years his senior and former Master. Force be his witness, he will not allow it.

Anakin makes a suffering, exasperated exhale when Obi-Wan manages to slip out of his grip— only to be yanked back by the force. All he manages is a choked gasp of protest before the air is knocked out of him, his back hitting a firm chest a little too hard. There’s a vindictive sort of satisfaction in hearing Anakin chokes out a surprised exhale too, clearly, he did not account for the impact being this strong.

“Karkin’ hell…” he hears the boy muttering and snorts out, laughing even while Anakin wraps his mechno-arm around him, pulling him back into the not-as-offensive as before little spoon position. Fine, he thinks. He’ll allow it, just for this one night…. 

His eyes close and he shudders when Anakin’s nose press against his nape, he can feel the slow, deep inhale— can feel the content exhale that follows. 

“Finally.” Anakin breathes out, as if he was waiting for this moment longer than the few minutes  just now. Like he needed it, himself. Like it was not Obi-Wan, pathetic and alone, messaging his former Padawan while drunk beyond reason that led him here, but his own needs, own wants. Like he needed this too, him. Like he needs him. Obi-Wan. 

“Oh Force…” Obi-Wan calls upon it without realizing, without meaning it. Only the force can stand witness to this moment, judge it, measure it. Guide him, tell him right from wrong. “Force.” His voice trembles with it, realizing for the first time that Anakin does see him, in truth, does and still…

“It’s fine with it.” Anakin remarks, nonchalant, amusement coloring the timbre of his voice. “You don’t have to shout at her, I don’t think she like it very much” Anakin refers to the Force differently every time, Obi-Wan suspects he does it simply for the joy of throwing off the younglings.

It unsettles Obi-Wan as well, he will not admit that much, though. Anakin’s connection with the force was always stronger, always different than anyone else’s. If he’s saying that the Force is not finding this offensive…. Obi-Wan will trust him. Anakin enjoys messing around at times, stretching the truth about how the Force works, but he’d never lie about this, not to him. 

Obi-Wan’s body relaxes so completely that he practically sags into Anakin, relief, so much relief. It feels…. Good. There’s rightness to it that even without the Force humming pleasantly in his ears, he’d recognize. Like sharing a sleeping cot in the war zones, minus the blood and gore and pain… it feels secure, it feels…good…. 

He feels himself being lulled to what he suspects will be a long and restful sleep. Such a luxury as of late. “Mnh..” He jolts a little when a hand moves across his side, resting at his hip bone and then back up to his side. He should not permit Anakin this much leeway with him and yet…. He likes it… oh he likes it.

So he doesn’t comment it, allowing him to continue, to stroke him and care for him, and hold him. He is not leaving. 

Sleep comes ease, as easy as an inhale. One moment he is aware of all that surrounds him, the scent and warmth, the weight and touch. The next he is sinking into the open embrace of rest. Distantly, he feels the touch of a Force Signature he knows as well as his own. It is the only half of it, after all. Accepting it, is as easy as breathing too. 

There’s a distant shift, even in sleep he can feel the bond snapping back into place, like moons falling into a familiar route, circling a singular sun. Maybe it was not Anakin who was the sun around which Obi-wan was revolving all along, but their shared….