#an 'ideal' wife and etc;;;) made me almost cry because Jimmy's ex;;;; reminds me of me whenever i'm forced to have a 'discussion' with my | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pannacottawarrior · 5 years ago

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in a sort of related note; at the christians or any other religious people who follow me (idk if there any; i have a small following anyway lmao) just;;;

please be aware of the kinda questionable things they tell you to do;;;

like please don’t feel like you’re doing anyone a favor or ‘saving’ someone by showing them the ways of god;; like go ahead and TEACH them about your religion if they ask for it but just keep in mind of how you word things; go about teaching them and etc;;;

wearing down your partner, friends and etc. into accepting your religion isn’t okay

#Personal #please be respectful and if you got the idea that 'i have to have a christian or etc S/O to be a good follower but if i meet someone who #doesn't believe in the same religion (or lack thereof) as me then that's okay; i might be able to change them over the years' then uhh #yeah that's bad and literally just you wearing them down until they accept;;#and oh god hearing Mr Atheist talk about how bad of a person he was before then just makes me think of how I was when i was younger; i #didn't wear anyone down but i did have the idea that i'd be able to get all my friends and loved ones to be christians with time;;#and the thing he said about how he'd demean his ex in arguments; like the yelling thing? about how he'd demean her for yelling at him and go #on about how he's calmer and etc and how he was better than her at that moment;;; (ofc he feels differently about it now and i'm sure he's #become a better person; i mean look at the way he treats people and talks about things; women's rights; abuse and etc;;;) and how he said #that now that he's changed he saw how she was right to yell at him because that was the only way he'd actually consider what she'd say and #actually listen to her (which just reminds me of how Paul interrupts Morgan; told her how sinful she was and changed her to fit his idea of #an 'ideal' wife and etc;;;) made me almost cry because Jimmy's ex;;;; reminds me of me whenever i'm forced to have a 'discussion' with my #parents; especially my dad;;;; he ALWAYS talks about how i yell and cry and get hysterical and i'm too emotional and i'm not calm and #rational and not thinking logically like him and i get too worked up over every small thing and even though Ny and Frerin and other people #like my IRL friends and so much more have told me before that they (especially my dad) are wrong for acting that way and that it's their way #of wanting to maintain power and etc like that;; (sorry Frerin if i got anything wrong;;; going through conversations - even with friends #online or even with Ny - that related to past 'discussions' with my parents distresses me so much;;; i don't want to look at them if it's #in the past because i know i'll 'emotionally act out' because i feel wronged by them but then i'll get punished in the end) i still go 'okay #but maybe i shouldn't have yelled; that really made my case worse even if at the time i felt wronged and that they weren't listening to me #at all and that was the only way they'd understand how much their behavior affected me (even if they weren't going to nor will ever change #the way they act or treat me because they see nothing wrong with what they do or say and will always say 'see?? you still act rude even when #we try to be nice to you???' if i 'act out' (get upset when they say i'm purposefully lazy; don't have a job and am wasting their money; my #brother is always in the right no matter what - even if he treated me badly; when i ask them if they could lower the volume because i'm #studying/doing work and don't have a study room nor desks and chairs in my bedroom but they get mad and turn the volume up louder or just #get upset and say i'm so rude; whenever i get confused and 'make a weird expression' when they're randomly curt to me when i ask a question #and they say i'm disrespectful for making those faces and so on;)) i don't have PTSD i think but in a way; that new episode of Mr Atheist #triggered me;;; shows that feature abuse like AtLA or RWBY never triggered me but this one YT video did and it's not Mr Atheist's fault #cultish christian stuff is basically emotional abuse anyway with the manipulation and behavior control so it's more like my fault especially #since i knew it'd be about that since it's P&M; their past videos have always unsettled me so i should've expected so or worse #i don't regret it though since it's really nice to have more people recognize shitty behavior like that more and TELL others about it; but;;

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