#also watched amadeus this weekend which like triggers a lot of my 'i was special when i was young but now i'm lame' Stuff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

swankpalanquin · 10 months ago

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the past few years i have been trying really hard to be okay with being mediocre and like just living a good enough life and i don't have to be anything special… but i do still get that 'i want an award' feeling fairly often

#also watched amadeus this weekend which like triggers a lot of my 'i was special when i was young but now i'm lame' Stuff #which is like so big baby-ish of me when there is like actual real issues happening in both my life and the larger world #but i'm like what if i were really creative and everyone liked me... and then i don't do anything about it lol #or like what if i made some cool discovery in one of the various fields i sort of dip my research toe into... and again don't do anything #so i guess it comes down to: i am too inert to warrant an award... which is fair lol

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