#also tumblr word limit got my ass it wasn't a 3 parter. it was four. rip

[zexonyte]

of course this isn't all of them, i am sure there had to have been some giygas loyalist doomers in the mix. they probably all ended up dying and crumbling horribly when he started to REALLY fuck with the place (aka when he was dying)

would be cool if a couple got dragged out in time though. they are traumatized for life and likely for death too.

so yeah. methinks they deserve to unionize and maybe even build their own society as free as possible from the gamers ok wow this was a shit name to pick for them.

giegue's kind is, however, very busy quelling the rumors that one of their own tried to literally end the universe itself, saying that "humans corrupted him, they made him that way and we had no idea" which has. surprisingly, very mixed reviews, and in a sense isn't even wrong (still put horribly but yk. it's. shit it's something alright). a lot of other civilizations are starting to trust more in what the starmen have to say and also if giegue's kind lost their grip on starmen, they'd be far more open to attacks and being conquered back. everyone's kinda getting sick of those guys and their monopoly and giygas tipped them over the damn edge

however there are a good fair share of aliens who doubt anything happened and also wanna maintain the status quo. amidst all of this conflict everyone's too god damn busy to give two shits about earth

those who aren't are also kinda scared because what do you MEAN four of their children defeated the Universal Cosmic Destroyer. what are they feeding those kids?? psychic steroids???

no and yes. garbage hamburgre has a lot of surprise beneifit

do you think porky would be included in the war stories. i think yes. boy do i fucking think yes. (visibly holding back tears (of insanity))

tired rn but as a slightly funnier alternative imagine if all these hard boiled space mercenaries were deeply fucking afraid of the most Unwell 13 year old you've ever seen. like oh. oh he turned off the machine. HE TURNED OFF THE MACHINE. FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES? WHAT ARE THEY FEEDING THESE FUCKING KIDS

would be kinda. well i'd be something if aliens focused on earth again and indirectly caused the end of that world like an intergalactic cold war but i think it's more fitting if i followed with the theme of evil aliens make everything suck -> evil makes everything suck -> humans make everything suck. put very badly but i'm talking about aliens now i don't wanna dive into all that other stuff just yet

so i imagine earth and humanity just kinda destroyed itself after a bit maybe and THAT is what makes aliens lose interest in it period. i mean jeez everyone is dead, including the psychic people, everywhere else is rubble so going there isn't even worth it, yikes. how the mighty fall… one of their sayings i hear, how it rings true…

cue mother 3

they aint found em yet but if they do they gon be surprised

alright folks

i found this buried somewhere in my notes app and im 87% sure i wrote it bored out of my mind during english class. so have some crudely written 2000 or so words of Starman Headcanons (somewhat) (1/3)

metallic shell, organic insides (mostly)

some sort of affinity for magnetic fields. maybe how some grow spikes? like a long time exposure to strong magnetic fields makes them grow spikes. i can see it

born without their shell, forming it throughout childhood. it's the part that regenerates the fastest, but wounds or shell damage is still highly dangerous because it may make it grow in undesirable spots, such as inside your body, and the boosted growth endangers you even more. kinda like those boars with tusks that can pierce their own skull. and corals

speaking of corals. that's how they form the shell. just as giegue's species, starmen come from an aquatic planet with a shit ton of metallic matter suspended on it? is that the word? whatever its like ferrous water. they use it to build the shells like corals do. underneath it they bear resemblance to giegue's species if they were like tailless and earless and all

oh yeah both of those share a common ancestor. yea they're from the same planet. yea that strange camaraderie is part of why giegue's species allow the starmen to use PSI. ill get back to this later maybe

also giegue's species is a mouthful so im gonna call them gamers now

starmen reproduce mainly asexually through fragmentation. like starfish. why? i said so.

do they reproduce sexually too?? who the FUCK knows man but if they do it sure isn't internally

are they vertebrates? invertebrates? ¯_(ツ)_/¯ (probably invertebrates, or an alien version of that)

unlike popular belief their earth name isn't starmen because of them being aliens. it's because the one who named them was really into starfish. saw one's detached arm regenerating and was like "holy shit… it's like that weird ass fish i saw the other day"

everyone else understandably so didn't catch onto this because why would you and went with "ouughh Man from Stars.." which is succint and understandable but it's boring as hell. let me have this.

their sheer psychic prowess makes them highly sought after as mercenaries. modern starman society is somewhat shaped around this and ESPECIALLY around their gamer relatives

space mercenaries babey!

coming back to their shell. ghosts of starmen, aka starmen elders, have begun their decaying process and are losing their affinity with magnetic fields. can't regrow or renew shell anymore. die of normal causes like disease or regular Old Age typically but if not that aint saving them because they die for lobster reasons too.

however, they're still highly valued and sought after, not just because of their overall rarity compared to juvenile/younger starmen, but because they have untold years of skill and experience in conquest and battle. AND sheer psychic power even if they're slowing down a lil

this includes so-called ghosts of starmen (who are named for their ethereal physical appearance and not actually because they're ghosts, although that would be cool as hell i do think they at least deserve a break in the. afterlife. for aliens? they deserve a rest), starmen deluxe, and final starmen, these last ones having the highest demand (high skill and strength while still being relatively young)

starmen's shells can be branded with crests to show/pledge allegiance. many have or have had several crests at once. starmen with a single crest are choosing to display ultimate loyalty to a single power which sure as fuck means something to the cosmos. ALL those civilizations you could get hired by, and even among the nations who are allied/have peace together some still refuse to get more than one, which is seen as. rude as hell like what the fuck man we're pals

starmen nationalism??????? i GUESS????

not sure if that's the exact word, but whatever man english isn't my mother (heh) language

a starman without crests… ohh man. they know the system sucks ass and are also seen as kinda. dissidents. and pests because ???? you're a starman asshat what else are you good for. man i did not like writing that