#also that one scene where bora's brother picks him up WHEN I TELL YOU I HAVE NEVER WANTED TO BE ANOTHER PERSON GETTING TO HOLD JUNMY SO BAD

[dmumt]

really want to rewatch rich man since it's been three years since i watched it last but i know that the moment i see junmy as yoochan sleeping all curled up i'll have no choice but to jump out the window

[threecheersforinking]

Drama Review: Reply 1988

**spoilers ahead**

*if you haven't seen the show, read my spoiler free WYSW post first!!*

This post will continue what I started with Boys Over Flowers (where I wrote a long unsolicited dump of all my thoughts on a show I really loved). And, needless to say, I really loved this show too. I honestly haven't cried this much at a tv show in a long time, and that's saying something because I cry very often. I think I teared up at least once every episode, and don't even get me started on the final episode because I'm pretty sure I was full on crying for at least 1 hour straight.

I guess the reason I was so attached to this show, and likely the reason this show is so popular, is because it's so relatable. Even if you haven't lived in that one particular alley in Ssangmun, most people can relate to growing apart from friends, moving out of their parents' house, leaving their childhood behind, etc. I felt like I watched this at a really appropriate time in my life, and maybe that's why I was especially emotionally impacted by it.

Characters

If you've ever read my blog before you'll know that I love a large cast of characters! So I was very pleased with all the characters and the different dynamics they had in this show. As an anime fan I'm used to teenagers/young people being the focus with adult characters being kind of an afterthought, but I really loved how developed and important all the adult characters were. The parents weren't there just to be parents, they had their own goals, lives, and struggles.

Sunwoo was probably my favorite character, but it was hard to pick a favorite because they were all so great. Funnily enough, Bora was originally my least favorite character (due to how cruel she was to her siblings at the start), but I'm happy to say she really grew on me. The development she went through due to her relationship with Sunwoo made me like her a lot more. The two of them were so cute together and I really enjoyed their secret dating era in 1989.

I also loved Taek and Sunwoo's blended family, I thought it was so nice how they became brothers after being friends for so many years. The way the show handled the two boys' reactions and adjustment to their parents dating was really well done as well.

The Romance Subplot

As I've said before, I like love triangles, and this show was no exception. Coming directly off of my watch of Boys Over Flowers (in which the love triangle lowkey had me ripping my hair out), this love triangle was a breath of fresh air. Honestly I have never been so conflicted as to which love interest I'm 'rooting for' before. I think I may have been subconsciously rooting for Junghwan because that 'fake confession' episode hit me right in the gut, but I loved both Taek and Junghwan so much I genuinely didn't even care.

One of my favorite scenes in the show is how after Sunwoo explains to Taek that you can tell how someone feels about a person by how they look at them, the episode ends with Taek noticing how Junghwan is looking at Deoksun. It's a great dialogue-less moment and really sets the tone for their dynamic for the rest of the show.

While I liked this love triangle, I do think the implications of the time jump put me off a bit. As I said, I was kind of rooting for Junghwan, and the episode where he realized he lost Deoksun to Taek was heart wrenching. But as Junghwan said himself, what exactly had he been doing for the past 5 years? It was a bit hard to pity him when he had so many opportunities to ask her out and beat Taek to the punch.

Other Stuff

Honestly, I didn't love the 2015 flash-forwards too much, they were too few and far between and took me out of the immersion of the 80s/90s setting. I think the first one was ok, the others felt a little less necessary, and then it went so many episodes without a single 2015 scene that I almost forgot they were a thing. I enjoyed the 2015 scenes in the last episode after we knew who got married to who, but it still felt like the show could've done without those scenes. The most important/emotional moments in the series happened in Ssangmun anyway.

The time skip from 1989 to 1994 had me kind of displeased at first, and I didn't know why, because I've watched tons of shows with a time skip before and had no problems with it. I think it was in part because the first 17 episodes of the show took place over the span of less than a year, and then all of a sudden in the last 20 minutes of the 17th episode it jumped ahead 5 years without a warning.

But to be honest, I think my dislike of the time skip came from the fact that I really enjoyed these characters' daily lives and the regular pace the show had been going at that such a far jump ahead was making the end of the series feel more imminent.

I'm really glad I gave Reply 1988 a chance, especially because I barely knew anything about it before watching. I'm really enjoying kdramas so far and glad I've been trying to watch more of them.

Thanks for reading!

-threecheersforinking

[rxdonmyledger]

The Haunted Manor-An Avengers story.

A/N: Hi everyone! It’s been a while since I wrote something but there you go! Since we are in October and that means spooky time, I wrote this piece! I used some prompts in this list but if you want me to read something, please, feel free to send me more requests! 

And if you like my writing and want to support it, you can buy me a Ko-fi!

Prompts: I keep hearing noises coming from the attic…”  “I had a dream that I killed you.” “P-please… put the knife down.” “Maybe an exorcism is in order…?” “Wasn’t someone murdered in this house? Why are we here?”

Words: 3,077

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: None, I think. Some spooky descriptions. Loki being a cutie.

This was Tony’s fault. Of course, it was him. Tony freaking Stark, the only one capable to suggest the idea of spending a whole week in a haunted house to celebrate Halloween. This couldn’t be real. It had to be a dream.

“Oh, c’mon, grumpy faces. Cheer up! We’ll have fun!”

“Wasn’t someone murdered in this house? Why are we here?” you asked, hand on your hip and staring at him with an eyebrow raised. Bucky, Sam, and Steve were still taking the different bags out of the cars.

“To do something different for a while. Did you have a better idea?”

“You could have created your own ghost” Clint said.

“Holidays in Bora Bora” retorted Natasha.

“Drinking ale while fighting in Muspelheim” everybody stared at Thor, who had his usual big grin. “What? It’s fun. That’s where Loki and I did ‘Get help’ for the first time’

“By the Norns’ sake, I tell you it’s humiliating” The God of Mischief groaned while taking his own bag and walking to the front porch, where you all were standing. You smiled sympathetically at him and shrugged.

It had been difficult for the team to accept Loki in the team as one of the Avengers. His mischievous nature was something to consider and they were not sure if he could be trusted. Thor had insisted and all of them decided to give the trickster an opportunity.

That didn’t mean it was easy, though. They usually shut up when he entered in a room or they refused to let him know about the upcoming missions. You hated that attitude and one night you scolded all of them.

“You all keep saying you’re the Earth mightiest heroes. You are an example to children around the globe!”

“He tried to subjugate a whole human race, Y/N” Steve said, raising his voice, which was completely out of his character.

“He was Thanos’s prisoner! For God’s sake, even Thor explained his behaviour and accepted to take responsibilities for his brother’s actions!”

They didn’t say anything, so you just growled and picked up your food, heading to the living room while listening to their voices coming from the dining room, where you all were having lunch.

Well, not everybody.

Loki was staring out the window, with his hands behind his back, staring at the vast landscape around the compound. His food remained untouched, still in his plate. You sat down. There was no need on making some unnecessary noise, so he knew you were there. It took him a moment. But he knew. His silky and smooth voice made you shiver.

“There’s not many people who can sneak up on me, little one” he said, not even turning to you.

“Natasha was one of them” you replied with a smile, taking the fork and starting to eat. Loki smiled and turned to you.

“Well, you were her apprentice. I suppose you learnt some things from her. Shall I call you little spider?”

“I don’t think she’ll like it” you said with a chuckle, shaking your head. It was then when Loki realised you had your own plate.

“What’s that?”

“This?” You pointed at the food, staring at his blue orbs with a wide smile. “It’s called food. Its purpose is to give you energy, so you don’t die. Something I think you failed” you added, pointing at his own plate with your chin.

“Smart-ass” Loki sat down in front of you, frowning and crossing his arms. “Why would you like to eat with me, Y/N? Aren’t you afraid I will conquer your world?”

“Listen…” you sighed, not knowing what to say or how. “Their behaviour is…”

“Justified”

“Shut up” He made a movement as if he was zipping his mouth and you were surprised someone as cocky and smug as Loki Odinson was obeying you. “I want to apologise. For everything. I understand your situation and I don’t want you to be alone. Although, I’ll leave if that’s what you want”

Loki started at your face for a moment, taking his time. You started to feel nervous under his intense gaze. Probably he was trying to figure if you were lying or not. Why would you? Still, you understood Loki’s distrust. How many people had been kind to him? Excluding his mother and now his brother, you suspected that just a few.

Instead of kicking you out, Loki said nothing and started to eat, under the astonishes gazes of the team, who observed the scene from the door. They had come to apologise to Loki, but then decided that they’d come later.

You had become friends after that. Well, if you could call friendship to the weird relationship you had.

Loki would come and go whenever he pleased. He would talk to you about books, Asgard and even the other worlds. You even remember falling asleep listening to his deep voice talking about Ymir and the creation of Midgard. Next morning, Loki would be gone, but a tray with warm pancakes would be waiting for you on the table.

“Okay, guys. We’re the Avengers. I’m sure it’ll be fun”

“Pepper has been regretting those words since she met you”

The team roared in laughter at your joke and you smiled sweetly at Tony, who tried to hide his smile and put on an indignant face, crossing his arms and shaking his head. Loki was smirking while staring at you.

“Okay, this house is not big enough for all of us. Just a few lucky ones have a single room”

You were one of them. The distribution was: Scott and Sam, Bucky and Steve, Natasha and Clint, Loki and Thor, and finally Tony, who denied having altered the results.

You all entered the old Victorian manor Tony had rented for a whole week. On the outside it was all black and the red roses in the garden caught someone’s eye. Inside the floors were wooden and the walls were covered with an old purple tapestry and black designs. Even the furniture seemed antique.

“Tony, so this house…they say is haunted?” Natasha asked while staring around her. Tony nodded. “Is it a business, then? Like, people come here expecting a supernatural experience?”

“Exactly. They promise adventure and a terrific night”

“What’s the name of the house again?”

“Allerdale Hall”

You snorted and shook your head, rolling your eyes. Of course, the owners had decided to name the manor after the Crimson Peak movie. Original. Except it was not. The team observed you as they all knew it was one of your favourite movies.

“I wouldn’t mind having my own Thomas Sharpe, I must admit”

Natasha and you stared at each other and laughed, shaking your heads and walking behind the rest of your friends, exploring the house.

“You don’t need him. Loki looks a little bit like him”

“I don’t” the God replied bluntly, staring at Clint, who shrugged and let his body fall on the couch. Loki looked at you and you mouthed ‘Just a little’, which made him shake his head.

The manor had the typical Victorian distribution, a large chimney in the main living room, a dining room with wonderful furniture. Hell, it had even a library. Something that caught you and Loki’s attention. You exchanged a look and you both knew that was your favourite room.

“Remember that book from Agatha Christie? And there were none? Imagine that we all start dying in this house” Your friends turned to look at you dead in the eye, serious faces all around you. Except Loki, who, apparently, found it amusing.

“Just to be clear, if any of us dies tonight I’m accusing you of murder” Tony said before heading to his room.

You smiled and sighed. It’ll be a long week.

“No…I can’t”

“I know you can. You have to”

“Loki…”

The screams were more audible now. It felt like the demons rising from Hell and chasing you. Something was hitting the windows and you thought they’d break. You could hear Natasha’s voice calling for Clint. Tony trying to reach Steve’s hand. Bucky trying to protect Sam.

They were losing. You were losing.

Unless…

“My dear…do it. I can only feel you”

It was then when you raised the gun and pulled the trigger.

Bang.

Bang.

That awful sound.

You tossed and woke up with your limbs tangled in the sheets. Your forehead was covered in sweat and you had a lump in your throat. You swallowed repeatedly and tried to breathe properly.

It was a terribly vivid dream.

Someone was chasing you. The house… The haunted house. And the only way to save all of you was to kill Loki. You could see his blue eyes on you, observing your features with a trembling smile.

No. Nonsense.

It was the bloody mood Tony had set on you all. It was that, and nothing more. You shivered when a cool breeze came through the windows, rocking the curtains.

Huh. Weird.

You were sure you had closed them before going to sleep. You decided not to overthink and stood up, closing the windows and putting on your slippers. You walked out the room, trying to keep quiet so you didn’t disturb anyone. Yet, the house didn’t want to cooperate as the wooden floor seemed to crack everywhere you stepped on.

After spending the day wandering around the house and the impressive garden, you all had dinner in the dining room, enjoying some time for yourselves. Being the Avengers was not a synonym for having holidays, truth be told.  Tony had insisted on telling ghost stories to set the mood for Halloween and the team had agreed. Thor and Loki had told some creepy Asgardian stories that were not creepy enough.

“C’mon, guys. Children won’t be frightened with that”

Loki decided to accept the challenge and, since he had spent most of his life in the palace’s library, he decided to tell some terrifying stories about Jötunheim and the Frost Giants. He also told you about Helheim and the fate of those who ended there.

It was a pretty scary story and you and Thor knew the Trickster enough to see he was proud of his job. Yet, Natasha won the round. You still remembered her soft and vibrant voice telling you Russian fairy-tales, with exotic names pronounced in her mother-tongue and dark plots. By the time she finished, all of you were too scared to say anything.

“Okay, guys. Time to sleep. And remember not to die or bother the ghosts in here!” Tony had said before heading to his own room.

And here you were, wandering around a Victorian manor, with a fluffy pyjama and fluffy slippers, walking to the kitchen to have some water. That would settle your nerves. Yes, that’s what you needed.

You were about to close the fridge when a voice startled you, making you to grab the first thing that was by your side, which happened to be a knife. You looked around you and found Loki leant against the door frame, with his hands up and a terrified look in his features.

“I swear to the Norns, Loki! I almost had a heartattack!” you said, almost screaming but yet, keeping your voice low so you wouldn’t wake up the rest of the team.

“My apologies, my little one” He replied, still starting at you. “P-please… put the knife down.”

You followed his gaze and you noticed he was looking at your hand, which grabbed a knife tightly. Hell, even your knuckles were white. You sighed and put it on the counter, leaning against it and rubbing your forehead.

“Sorry. I just had a terrible nightmare and wanted some water…” You realised Loki was observing you with a worried gaze and he walked towards you.

“What kind of dream? Y/N?” he repeated after a moment. You were silent and hesitated about telling him the nature of your dream. Should you?

“It’s nonsense”

“It’s not if it left you in such a disturbed state”

You sighed and hugged your body, feeling his hands on your arms, rubbing them to make your body warmer.

“I had a dream that I killed you.”

Loki stayed silent for a moment and you thought that he’d be worried or pissed off about it. To your surprise, he just shrugged and smirked, staring at you smugly.

“My little spy, I am quite a few thousands of years old. You’re not the first one. You’re not that special” he retorted with a sarcastic tone and you elbowed him on the ribs, hearing his soft chuckles. “Why don’t we go back to bed? I could read something from the vast library we both fell in love with”

You smiled and opened your mouth to reply when a noise startled you, making you to look around. It was like the noise of heavy steps on the wooden floor. The walls seemed to be alive too and you could hear a faint cry in the middle of the night.

“Those noises…can you hear them?”

“Y/N… A house as old as this one becomes, in time, a living thing. It starts holding onto things... keeping them alive when they shouldn't be. Some of them are good; some of them bad... Some should never be spoken about again”

You turned your head and raised your eyebrow, crossing your arms and staring at him. Loki had pressed his lips and was trying to keep his laughs from escaping his mouth. He might be the God of Lies, you thought, but he was a terrible actor.

“Okay, now you’re quoting Tom Hiddleston in Crimson Peak”

He was about to reply when other noises became louder. Steps. Agile. Faster. You and Loki exchanged a gaze and you took the knife again while the God had a green ball of magic fire in his left hand, prepared to attack.

Suddenly, Clint’s bow was on sight, followed by the archer’s body and Natasha behind him. She was wearing her pyjamas too but had her blasters around her wrists. When they noticed who you were, they sighed in relief.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“I could ask the same” replied Natasha while turning off her devices. You all relaxed and left the weapons. But you were not calm for a long time. You soon saw Steve’s shield covering Sam and Bucky. Tony was following them with his blasters around his hand. Thor had come running with Stormbreaker in one hand and Mjolnir in the other one. You all stared at his night clothes. He was wearing an open robe and some shorts with flamingos on it.

“Is this a night party and nobody invited me?”

“Really funny, Tony. What are you all doing here?”

“I keep hearing noises coming from the attic…” said Bucky.

“Me too”

“We did too” replied Clint before sitting on the counter.

“C’mon. The house is old. Probably that…”

A horrific sound made you feel goosebumps and you all resumed your defensive positions, prepared to attack whatever it was. Maybe it was a burglar, thinking there was something valuable inside the manor. The screeching sound became louder and you swallowed hard.

“What the hell…?” you heard Natasha mutter, her back against Clint’s.

“Maybe an exorcism is in order…?” Tony whispered before a high-pitched scream was heard all over the house.

“This is like Siberia all over again” you muttered to Loki.

“You and I have a different concept of Siberia”

“If we can live after this, I swear to God, you’ll tell us what happened there” Sam shouted before Steve started to move towards one of the doors.

Suddenly, the light went off.

“Everybody, stay calm!” Tony shouted and Loki lighted the room with one of his green fires. “Thank you, Reindeer. Now it’s even creepier”

“Come in the light, ghost. Face the rage of thunder!”

“Thor, that does not help”

“It was your freaking idea to come here. If we don’t die, I promise I’ll make Pepper a widow!” you screamed when something hit the roof, making the whole house to tremble. You hugged Loki without noticing while the rest of the team tried to protect themselves.

“I think we should all go back to our rooms”

“Yeah. That’s how every horror movie goes” said Clint with a snort. “Get on different groups. And then we’ll be dead”

“I think Nat’s right” Steve replied, trying to keep his composure. Tony agreed with him and crossed his arms.

“We should try and get some sleep. Maybe the owners have this prepared”

The team sighed, tired and sleepy and decided it was a good idea. They stayed in the kitchen for a moment before leaving the place. You were still clinging to Loki like a koala and looked at him.

“Can I sleep with you?” you whispered with a soft voice and Loki felt his heart melting. His soft chuckles rumbled in his chest and he pressed a kiss on your forehead, nodding.

“Go with the Agent. I’ll be back with a giant cup of chocolate milkshake and cookies”

You smiled happily and kissed his cheek before running behind Natasha, asking her to not leave you alone. The kitchen was empty except for the God and Tony, who was smiling.

“I owe you one, Tin Can” Loki said, resting against the counter with his arms crossed over his chest, smiling. Tony raised his hands, shaking his head.

“I owe you too. Damn it, how did you do the trembling thing? It was fantastic!” Loki smirked and Tony shook his head. “Yeah, okay. Magic and stuff. Really good. Thank you for helping me”

“Pranks are my specialty. Call me when you need me again. Especially if the target is my brother.  I’ve never seen him that frightened” he added with a surprised tone before laughing. Tony joined him before raising his finger.

“I assure you, trickster. Hurt Y/N and you’ll desire to be back to Thanos’s”

“There’s no need to threaten, Stark. I like her. And no power in the nine realms will take her away from me” He answered solemnly before placing the food on a tray.

“Goodnight, Loki”

“Goodnight, Stark”

The God of Mischief walked to the stairs with a smile on his features. His hands held the tray while he imagined you laying by his side. Your soft aroma in his sheets. His head buried in your hair. Your soft hands against his.

No. Definitely, he was not letting you go.

[beencaughts]

“don’t do this here.”, “i can’t sleep.” AND “you deserve more.” !!

“don’t do this here.”

⊰ v. princess and the moon ⊱

Luna had officially lost her mind. She didn’t know why she felt compelled to enlist Pandora’s help with her homework. Sure, there were things she didn’t quite understand because of the language barrier, but it wasn’t anything she couldn’t figure out herself if she just took her time. They even could’ve gone to her and Cass’s place, but she insisted they go to Panda’s under the guise that her flat was closer. Luna felt so crazy for being there she nearly picked herself up from the couch to leave until Prince came through the door, shock and annoyance written across his face at the sight of her in his apartment. A small part of Luna felt embarrassed because she’d only shown up there after they slept together, but the more significant half told her to own the awkward situation she put herself in when he asked her why the hell she was there. She shrugged. “I needed help with some homework I didn’t understand,” Luna explained as she abandoned her seat to slowly approach Prince. “And Panda offered to help me, but she left her notes at school. It was lovely of her to ask Matt to take her back to get them, so I’ve been waiting for like 15 minutes for her to get back.” Her hips swayed with every word; her skirt about two inches higher and her shirt left open a couple of buttons more than they should be. She stood in front of him now, looking at him through her eyelashes innocently. Luna’s art didn’t lie in subtly today because she couldn’t help herself from running her hand from his neck down to his chest. “Sad she’ll be back soon, isn’t it?” She pouted playfully, though, it quickly transitioned into a smile when he grabbed her hand roughly before muttering a stern, “Don’t do this here.” And right on queue, the doorknob started to jiggle. “Maybe next time,” Luna whispered, making her way back to her seat before Pandora walked in with her notes.

It was a few hours later that they finally finished studying. Luna managed to get through it, grasping a few concepts she was genuinely confused about, but her mind had been elsewhere the entire time. Her thoughts were filled with Prince. What he was doing in his room, if he couldn’t stop thinking about her like she couldn’t, why the hell she wanted him so badly. They’d only slept together a few times, and she was already consumed by him. Whenever Matt or any guy flirted with her these days, all she could think about was Prince. It was sick, really, since they still fought 98% of the time, but he was different �� riskier, even — than most guys. He kissed her differently, touched her differently, treated her differently. If she were sane, she’d run far away, but right now all she wanted to do was get closer to him. “Luna? Did you hear what I said?” Pandora’s voice rung out, pulling Luna from her fantasy. “Uh, yeah, I will just let myself out. Thanks again for the help.” Luna gave her friend a hug before she exited her room and headed for the front door. Her eyes lingered on Prince’s door as she walked past it, her self restraint crumbling by the second once the thoughts returned. “Luna, go home,” The Spaniard whispered to herself, her hand hovering over the doorknob of the front door. She could leave and go home completely frustrated and driving herself crazy, or she could stay and sleep with her friend’s brother. There was some sort of code against that in movies she watched, but surely that was just an American thing. Luna sighed, finally twisting the handle. The door opened and closed, but Luna hadn’t been on the other side of it. No, that was saved for Prince’s room which she graciously let herself into, the sight of him with only sweats on in his bed making her mouth run dry. “This time is really the last time, Prince,” She warned before joining him on his bed.

⊰ v. no reason ⊱

Iola sat at the edge of the boardwalk with her feet gently dipping into the crystal blue water of Bora Bora. She watched the party her family was attending in the distance, lighting up the navy blue sky. A sad smile graced her lips and a lone tear followed. Even when she was meant to be on vacation, forgetting about her everyday problems, they still seemed to follow her. She didn’t want to face the actual reality of her relationship, but the footsteps approaching her told her that she was going to have to nearly 6,000 miles away from home. 

Iola was living in a scene from Keeping Up With The Kardashians, literally. It was one thing for her family’s annual winter vacation to happen at the same resort in Bora Bora as theirs, but it was another for them all to be gathered at a dinner table at the resort’s party with her hating at least three people sitting at it. When they first arrived, Iola had a smile permanently etched onto her face. She was always excited about her family’s vacation. Wherever they went was warm and sunny compared to Chicago where they had to trudge through four inches of snow during a polar vortex this time of year. There was also a lot Iola had been dealing with personally, and a vacation with the people she loved the most seemed to be the perfect distraction until right now. Iola never hid her affections for Jason in front of her family. Whenever she wanted to kiss him, she kissed him. Whenever she wanted to hold his hand, she held his hand. It wasn’t anything new or surprising that even at dinner, they seemed to be their own little world. Iola had been in the middle of making a Spongebob reference to Jason when her eldest brother chimed in. “It’s so cute that even after 10 years of only dating you two are still so into each other.” The comment seemed innocent, but the ‘only dating’ part had her raising her brow quizzically, but before she had the chance to ask, her brother-in-law spoke up. “10 years? That’s longer than Leah, and I’ve been together, and we’re married with kids.” Iola pettily wanted to correct them to 9 years. Next, was Leah’s turn. “When are you two planning to get married and have kids anyway?” Everyone looked to them for an answer, but she could hardly formulate a sentence at the moment. Iola had been feeling more sensitive than usual lately and having to hear her family rag on the fact that they weren’t married despite that being the one thing she wanted more than anything, she was just trying to keep from crying. “I —uh—like, I mean, I just turned 26 in October. I don’t think we should, like, jump into being engaged and—um—having, like, kids and stuff? We can hardly take care of our cat,” Iola finished with an awkward chuckle. Everyone else carried on with their usual conversation after, but Iola remained silent for the rest of the dinner. Even after the dinner was over and the main event of the party started, Iola found herself withdrawn from the event. She didn’t feel too well — mentally or physically — after that. All she could think about was if things were her way, they would be married. But that was the problem: getting married was what she wanted, not him. Iola couldn’t understand how Jason could profess his undying love for her and at the same time not want to prove it. It made it hard for her to believe that he was really in their relationship for the long run. That was partly why she was so insecure and jealous all the time. “Iola, don’t do this here, please,” Jason whispered so only she could hear him, suddenly thrown back into reality. She was sat off to the side, curled into Jason’s side. Of course, he knew that she was overthinking about dinner because that’s what she always did. Iola shook her head. “I’m gonna head back to the room. I don’t feel too good, but you stay and have fun, babe.”

There was a silence between them, neither one of them really sure of what to say. Everything had already been said the other twenty times they fought about it, except there was something she never asked before. “Jason,” she spoke up, her voice cracking. “Ignore what I want for a second. Do you ever want to get married or, like, have kids?” Iola glanced over to her boyfriend, and the hesitation she saw on his face told her everything she needed to know. He just didn’t want to hurt her feelings telling the truth. Picking herself up, Iola smiled sadly. “No, you were right. We shouldn’t do this here. I’m so stupid for asking that. You should—You should go back to the party. I’m gonna go to bed. I still don’t feel so good.” She didn’t wait for him to answer. Iola was already taking off to their room to keep him from seeing her cry about this again. She crumpled the second the door shut close. Her back slid down the door, pulling her face into her knees once she hit the floor. Iola was beginning to think telling him she was pregnant was going to be a lot harder than she thought. 

⊰ v. katie and leo ⊱

There were polaroids scattered across the floor while Katie, Eli, Ava, and Leo went through them trying to piece together a time where they didn’t exist. The adventure had begun innocently. They would laugh at pictures of their parents, smile sadly at the ones with Katie’s mom, and awe at the ones of their parents together. A lot of the photos were of Leo’s parents, but that was because his mom was the photographer of nearly all of them. He’d found the box of pictures when his mom sent him down to the basement to fetch something for her. Leo almost kept the discovery to himself until he noticed how much the others were in them, and it felt entirely too selfish not to share, especially with Katie. She only had pictures to remember her mom by. He couldn’t deprive her of some new memories. “Katie, your mom was fit. I can’t understand what she’d seen in your dad,”  Eli blurted out, earning him a slap on the arm from his sister. “What? I’m just saying what we’re all thinking.” And Eli was right. Leo had thought that, but that was because he didn’t understand why any woman would pick Nicholas Keller over every other man in London. According to his mom, Nick was an unfaithful cheater that never knew how to treat a woman right. It also didn’t help Nick’s image that he had some weird vendetta against Leo. Katie immediately snapped back at Eli that his mom was out his dad’s league too, which was also entirely true; however, this seemingly wholesome gathering quickly turned into gossip fest between the twins and Katie. “But at least my dad has money to make up for it. What does yours have? A bad attitude and a tiny penis?” They began telling secrets that he’d never heard before like his uncle having an almost drug problem or that he’d met Nick because they’d been dating the same girl. Leo stayed out of their back-and-forth gossiping. Partially because he had nothing exciting to add, but the other part being that he thought there was nothing he didn’t know about his parents. They never hid the fact that their relationship started out really rocky, and that they actually hated each other for years before that. He thought he knew everything. He thought. “Leo, what are you so quiet for?” his cousin inquired, turning the attention to him. “I don’t have anything to say. My parents are pretty tame compared to yours.” The expression on Eli’s face told Leo that maybe he was mistaken about that. Eli’s eyes glinted with mischief before he turned to look to Katie. “My poor ignorant cousin. Your parents have a lot more in common with ours than you think. My parents were secret lovers. Katie’s mum left her dad. Your dad left your mum except he didn’t tell her before he did. Or have I got that part wrong, Katie?” Leo looked to her with confusion written all over his face. Why didn’t his parents tell him this? Why did all of his friends know and never bother to tell him before now? Why didn’t she tell him? Then he thought about how she knew that in the first place and then his confusion shifted into anger. “Your dad is a fucking cunt,” Leo chuckled bitterly. If Leo were thinking correctly, he would’ve considered her asking him not to “do this here” in front of Eli because he was only looking for drama, but he absolutely wasn’t thinking correctly. All he could think about was Nick gossiping about his parents while leaving out all of the things he’d done, and then the words were coming out of Leo’s mouth without much thought. “He can tell everyone else’s business, but I bet he didn’t tell you he cheated on your mum, and that’s why she left a second time.” The room fell silent besides Eli’s chuckling. “This keeps getting better and better. Let’s keep it going.” Leo shook his head. “No. Get out. All of you.” He didn’t even bother to walk them out of the door, choosing to clean up the photos by himself instead. He could hear Katie, Eli, and Ava bickering on their way out. Sighing heavily, Leo ran a hand through his hair. Not only was he going to have to apologize to Katie later, but he knew he couldn’t let this thing about his parents go until he at least knew why they didn’t tell him. Suddenly, he was regretting his decision to share the photos with his friends.

“i can’t sleep.”

⊰ v. princess and the moon ⊱

Luna was disappointed when her eyes fluttered open, and she wasn’t greeted by Prince’s sleeping figure. At this time of the night, all she wanted was to fall asleep again in her boyfriend’s arms, but she needed to go find him for that to happen. Through her drowsiness, Luna swung her legs off the edge of the bed and walked into the living room. The room was nearly pitch black except for the streams of moonlight filling in sparse corners of the room and miraculously catching Prince too. She was far too busy admiring the way the light illuminated his features to take note of what he was doing before her arrival, and if she weren’t so tired, Luna would’ve attempted to drag him back to his room for other reasons. “What are you doing up so late, babe?” She questioned, dragging herself over to him and making herself comfortable in his lap, humming in response when his hand came to rest in her hair. When he responded that he couldn’t sleep, Luna had to use all the brain power she could muster to figure out why until it all came back to her. Today was his birthday. Panda always tried to do something nice for him, which Luna knew because they both masterminded a dinner with all of their friends last year. Panda wouldn’t stop talking about all of the times she tried to get her brother to at least acknowledge he was a year older the entire time. Prince would never admit it, but she knew something in him missed having his little sister around to annoy him today. “Then, I have a gift for you if you can’t sleep.” She paddled back into his room to dig around in her bag before returning with his gift in her hand. Luna watched in anticipation as he opened the box revealing a vintage black and gold Gucci watch. She gently removed it from its container and flipped over Prince’s wrist to fasten it. “My mom gave my dad this watch when they lived in London. My dad gave it to me before I left to have something from the both of them, but I think it’s nicer to give it to the man I love like my mom did,” She smiled, placing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. “And before you say no, my dad wanted you to have it too. Also, he says happy birthday.” It was a bit strange when she asked her dad how he felt about her idea, and he’d been completely on board with it. Her dad really liked Prince, but he liked his watch more. She figured it was because it made him think he’d be getting a wedding invitation in the mail soon after (which Luna wasn’t opposed to happening). Lifting his wrist to examine the watch in the moonlight, Luna smiled to herself. It felt right to be giving it to him even though the timing seemed kind of wrong. There was something much more important she needed to give to him, though. She reached into her pocket and pulled out an envelope with his name written in the front of it. “And this is from Pandora. I know you two aren’t on good terms right now, but she asked me to give this to you.” Luna held it out to him, but she hesitated to let go when he took it. “I’m going back to bed, but, Prince, actually the read the card before you do too.” Luna pressed a kiss into his temple. “Happy birthday, love.”

⊰ v. no reason ⊱

Iola could only imagine what Scotland would be like. Would it be endless green fields like Jason claimed? Or would it be more like London? Maybe a mix of both? Regardless, she was so excited that Jason was finally taking her there. Not a week went by where they weren’t surrounded by her gigantic family, but she hardly got a glimpse into his family life. He was so invested in her life, but she felt disconnected from his. She knew he had a brother, a sister, a dad, and a mom. She knew what they did for a living, and that was it. What Iola knew about them was nothing like actually meeting them. There was no real reason why Jason kept them apart for so long. He often used the excuse that they celebrated two different holidays this time of year, but Iola was always open to celebrating Christmas with him. This year she was crossing two things off her list. For most of the night, Iola tossed and turned. She was excited, nervous, and downright anxious to meet his family, and it was all she could think about. Would they like her? Would she like them? Would she even be able to understand them? All of these thoughts were running through her head. Their flight was in the morning, but Iola found herself not being able to sleep through her jitters. “I can’t sleep,” Iola whispered as she turned onto her side to face Jason with the hope she wasn’t disturbing him. “I can’t sleep, either.” She was relieved she wasn’t the only one. Moving to his side of the bed, Iola wrapped an arm around his waist as she cuddled into his side. “I’m nervous they won’t like me or think I’m too immature for you. And what if your mom doesn’t like me?” Iola grimaced at the thought. The same thoughts keeping her up was keeping him up too. She would’ve assured him everything would be fine if she hadn’t voiced her concerns already. Instead, the corners of her lips lifted into a mischevious smile. “Well, we’re both awake, and it doesn’t seem like we’re going to sleep any time soon. I’m sure there’s something we can do to distract ourselves.”

⊰ july 17th ⊱

Arianna stared out of the window. The rain beating against the glass somehow soothing her from the anxiety blooming in her chest. It was almost every night she felt some sort of anxiety about being pregnant again. Six months into her pregnancy, and everything was going smoothly. The baby was super active, healthy heartbeat, in the right position, and all the ultrasounds came back perfect — everything was perfect. But from her experience, she could never be comfortable until her baby was in her arms, breathing and alive. Being pregnant wouldn’t be nearly as scary if she didn’t know firsthand that everything could be fine the whole time and still end up losing her baby. Her eyes shut close, focusing on the storm outside as she ran her hand soothingly over her stomach, taking deep breaths to calm herself, but it didn’t work. She turned over onto her side to check if Zayn was awake, but he was already facing her with his eyes wide open, filled with concern. “I hope I wasn’t keeping you awake,” she whispered sheepishly. It was bad enough that her anxiety was keeping her up at night. Arianna did not want to pass that on to Zayn too. She needed at least one of them to be sane enough to reassure the other everything would be okay, and it wasn’t going to be her. He shook his head no, sliding an arm around her to bring her in closer, mumbling “I can’t sleep anyway,” to reassure her she wasn’t the reason. Arianna didn’t buy it. He could blame it on the storm, but she knew that her sighing, fidgeting, and running her hand over the belly was the real cause of his insomnia. His willingness to lie to spare her the additional dread was appreciated, though. Arianna pressed the lightest of kisses to Zayn’s lips, pulling away with a soft smile. She cuddled into his side and rested her head on his chest. There was a lingering silence between them —them both thinking the same thing but being too afraid to say it. Clearing her throat, Arianna finally spoke. “Who do you think she’ll favor? I’m always rooting for myself, but I do seem to think all of our kids will be carbon copies of you and like you more. I probably just like you too much, though.” Their chuckles filtered throughout the room, easing her anxiety. He entertained her question, which prompted them to stay up for a couple more hours picturing their future together with their daughter. It was dangerous to get both of their hopes up again, but every time Arianna thought about having another kid, she didn’t want to be drowned by anxiety. She didn’t want to feel like her world could come crashing down again at any moment. She wanted them to be as happy as they were the first time. 

“you deserve more.” 

⊰ v. princess and moon ⊱

Luna couldn’t bring herself to get out of bed. The soft white comforter encasing her in its plushy grip or the fact that she only got three hours of sleep was hardly the reason for it though. When her eyes fluttered open this morning, straining against the harsh brightness of her room until they adjusted to it 10 minutes later, she was greeted by the image of her boyfriend. His lips were on her cheek while her dimpled smile shined brightly as she attempted to look at him out of the corner of her eye. That was a version of them that she missed, and the picture sat next to her bed was a painful reminder that that Luna and Prince was no longer her reality. It wasn’t clear when they got to the point in their relationship where any little thing she did was worthy of an argument. Their last one started because Luna was tapping her pen on the table too much and ended with Prince storming out demanding his space. That was a week and a half ago. Luna felt like she was being thrown back into her last year of secondary school, and she was not enjoying it for the second time. She finally pulled herself out of bed, the emptiness of the flat looming over her as she made her way downstairs to the kitchen. Luna grabbed the box of cereal out of the cupboard and the milk out of the fridge, but the moment she sat down and started scrolling through her phone, all she wanted to do was text Prince. She shouldn’t have to text him first. He was the one that stormed out on her, but she also couldn’t let her pride keep her from speaking to her boyfriend another day. Picking up her phone, Luna navigated to her messages, a frown gracing her lips as she had to scroll down the app to find his name. Her finger hesitated over the keyboard before she typed a quick “I miss you” and switched off her phone. She’d drive herself crazy waiting for a response from him otherwise.

Luna’s hair was still dripping wet when she heard a knock at the front door. She hadn’t been expecting any visitors, especially the one standing on the other side of her door when she went downstairs to let them in. “Prince? What are you doing here?” He shrugged as he brushed past her. Luna thought to scream and yell at him about storming out and then not speaking to her for nearly two weeks, but all she could feel was elation. She was so happy to have him back in the same space as him. She missed him. One more day of being along and Luna would’ve lost her mind. “Are you hungry? I haven’t made anything, but if you’re hungry I can,” She asked, following behind him. When she entered the kitchen, she noticed he placed something on the countertop. Luna looked between him and the box of candy with a confused expression. Right before their fight, Luna had been telling him about her favorite candy from Spain since she’d been feeling homesick lately. She looked everywhere for it when she came to London but to no avail. The memory prompted her to tap her pen as she reminisced. She didn’t think Prince cared enough to listen to her let alone find it. Luna had a million questions like where did he find it, and why he did it, instead, she threw her arms around him in a tight embrace, not caring that the droplets from her hair were soaking through his shirt. “Thank you, Prince. I can’t believe you actually found it for me.” And it was as if Prince was somehow tapped into her thoughts this morning when he whispered, “You deserve more,” because she did deserve more and she knew it. She deserved a boyfriend that didn’t get upset over the smallest of things. She deserved a boyfriend that didn’t ignore her for days on end, and she deserved a boyfriend that she knew was capable of being this thoughtful. Luna wanted the Prince she had months ago, and this gave her the small glimmer of hope that he could go back to that. It was a lot more than what she had when she’d woken up. Taking a step back to look at him, Luna laughed as she blinked away the tears in her eyes. “Is this your way of apologizing because it sucks,” she joked. “But seriously, Prince, right now I just need you. We can talk about this later, but I want to eat these sweets I haven’t had in ages with my boyfriend that I haven’t seen in ages, okay?” Luna knew she was letting him off easy, but she loved him entirely too much to let this little fight get in the way. 

⊰ v. no reason ⊱

Iola’s phone buzzed from the fifth phone call she’s received in an hour. She didn’t even need to check it to know it was Jason whom she’d been ignoring since his outburst about completing his portfolio. Iola’s intentions had only been pure when she put him to bed. How could he focus on being creative when he could barely keep his eyes open? It didn’t make much sense to her, but it didn’t have to once he decided to throw her wanting him to sleep with him and her dad back into her face. Iola’s desire to sleep with Jason extended beyond her raging teen hormones looking for sexual gratification. It wasn’t to deny that that was definitely a part of it because she was very attracted to her boyfriend, but it was also about experiencing each other in ways they hadn’t before. She was undoubtedly attempting to share a part of her that only he could have. Maybe she wasn’t always the most gentle in her approach, but she put herself in a vulnerable position only for him to use it against her. There was then the added insult of implying that her dad was somehow to be credited for her successes. Iola knew she lived in a big house with fancy cars and clothes, but everything she accomplished, she got there on her own. Her dad never made a donation to her school to get her in or paid to get her test scores changed — she got in on her own merit. Even when she took a year off to focus on modeling, Iola tried to minimize her dad’s influence over her career. Perhaps if he hadn’t snapped at her, she could’ve asked her dad to buy him that opportunity. The buzzing in her ear finally stopped, and this time for longer than fifteen minutes. There was some hope he finally got the hint she wasn’t ready to talk to him again. That time, however, was used by Jason to come to her home. Iola was just about to get ready for bed when she heard a familiar accent calling her name from outside. She walked over to her window and rolled her eyes at the sight of Jason. “What do you want?” He asked if she could let him up to talk, and although it went against her better judgment, Iola complied. She didn’t say a word the whole journey from downstairs to upstairs in her room. The moment she heard him close her door, she whirled around with her arms folded over her chest, a stern look on her face. Iola wanted to see him grovel. Jason walked towards her, and just when he went to reach for her hands, she took a step back. “I don’t want you to get the impression I’m trying to sleep with you while you’re apologizing or does my dad need to buy that for me too?” Iola could admit that she was acting a bit immature, but she was still a 17-year-old girl. What was Jason’s excuse? He explained to her that he’d only said those things because he was tired and under a lot of stress. Iola rolled her eyes. “So that means take it out on me? Do you think that I deserved hearing my boyfriend say he doesn’t want me, and he thinks I’m some spoiled brat?” This time when Jason reached out for her, she allowed it. Her tough exterior quickly began deteriorating as she attempted to blink away the tears in her eyes. What Jason said really hurt her feelings. It made her feel insecure. He had to have thought that about her before for him to say it now. What else did he think about her that he was saving to use against her? Iola wasn’t completely sold on his ‘you deserve more’ speech about how she didn’t deserve that and deserved more than to be spoken to like that, but he seemed to be genuinely sorry. It didn’t mean that he didn’t believe those things about her, though. 

⊰ v. what if ⊱

The crackling sound of silence filled the room as Arianna and Ashton simply looked at each other — beauty surrounding her features, but bruises surrounding his. Arianna didn’t mean for things with him to go as far as they did. What happened between them that day Ari showed up at his door was never meant to happen again, but it did. Ari began having an affair. She thought that they were low key about it, but when Zayn had spotted a hickey on her side, and she was left with no choice except tell the truth, all of her fears had become a reality. Ari didn’t know about the future of her marriage, which should’ve been her main concern, but hearing about what her husband had gone out and done made it seem less important. Ashton was there for her whenever her relationship became too much to handle, and she felt it was her obligation to take care of him. “I’m sorry,” the blonde finally spoke. Her hands busied themselves, tearing open the alcohol packets along with the other things she bought on her way over. She ignored his wincing once she began cleaning his wounds. “This is all my fault.” She expected Ashton to tell her they both were at fault, but nothing he could say would make her shift the blame completely from her. Sure, they both could have exercised some self-control, but she was the one in the relationship, and her husband was the one who had done this to Ashton. How was she not wholly at fault? When she had found him in his room all beaten and bruised, Ari realized that her selfishness was what got them in this situation; her guilty conscience weighed heavily on her. She had just about disinfected any cut he had when her hands fell into her lap, her head hanging low to avoid his eyes. “I wasn’t worth all of this, Ash. You and I both knew the truth, so why did you keep seeing me? I was entirely too selfish to stop, but why did you never say no?” Arianna was curious about his answer, but she just cut him short with a smile because she decided that it wasn’t important why he didn’t. It was much too late to inquire about it now anyway. “You should keep this stuff in case you might need it. I should be going.” When Arianna reached for the jacket that sat beside her, Ashton’s hand wrapped around her wrist to stop her. “I never said no because you deserve more.” His words cut deep into her heart. Ashton was right. She did deserve more, but so did he. Ashton deserved someone who could love him back the way he needed wholeheartedly. Maybe this was the wakeup call they both needed to get on with their lives. “Thank you,” she whispered, pressing a lasting kiss to Ashton’s forehead before bidding what might be her final goodbye.