#also my blog is a portwell space and I'm not a r*na so frankly I'm not here to get into r*na debates

[brekker-by-brekkerr]

I think it’s unfair to say that both EJ and Ricky are teenagers but that doesn’t excuse Ricky’s action yet at the same time excuse EJ by saying he just thought he misinterpreted Gina’s feelings. The first time Gina gives Ricky advice with Nini she does it unprompted at his house, second time he tries stopping Big Red multiple times before she says “no it’s okay” and gives her advice, third time she sets a boundary and he clearly respects that the rest of the season and after she doesn’t even do the exercise with him he gives her all the space. They don’t even interact that much in 2B so this actually didn’t continue for a whole season. So clearly Ricky misinterpreted that maybe Gina is okay with giving advice and just wanted her opinion as a close girl friend. Maybe he thought she was moving on and okay with it too. Not saying EJ is a terrible person for cancelling the date under the circumstances but Ricky was also receiving mixed signals from Gina which led to confusion so it’s unfair to hold that against one but not the other. EJs problem isn’t that he cancelled it’s that he didn’t even feel the need to communicate why which led to her decline in self esteem that Nini helps build up. Ricky never made her feel that she had a chance because she states “he’s so happy now with Nini” which she wouldn’t say if she thought she had a chance. In Ricky’s case she was more upset about their romantic situation so had to take a step back from their friendship as well but he was never mean to her on purpose (not that EJ was either) but his intentions weren’t malicious so I don’t think that has to be held against him forever.

Okay first of alli didn't say being a teenager only excused EJ. both EJ and Ricky are teenagers and that can inform the way we view their behavior. It doesn't excuse any actions, it just makes them a lot more understandable. Just because I didn't specify that with Ricky doesn't mean I don't think that comes into play.

And once again, these are two very different situations. If you were going on a date with someone and found out they only thought of you as a sibling, how would that make you feel? Would you want to continue that date? Or if you were going to hang out with a friend you thought of like a sibling and found out they thought you were on a date--again, how would that make you feel? How else was EJ supposed to respond? Maybe he could have talked it through with Gina. But he didn't do something awful like continuing to talk to someone about your relationship even though you know that person has feelings for you. That's what I was saying in my original answer. Not that their age excuses either of them. Both of them make decisions that make sense for their age. EJ's actions are just not on the same level as Ricky's.

I went back and rewatched the s2 r*na scenes in question. the two times gina offers him advice are because she's sort of stumbled into these situations and those in no way invite him to ask her for advice later. also, it's the way he treats her throughout the season while disregarding what he knows about how she feels and how it builds up for gina that's uncomfortable to watch. i understand ricky may have just wanted to ignore the situation because he was going through a lot but he still had to know he was hurting her. and it's that scene in the 5th episode that really gets me. like why is he going to her knowing how she feels? why does he say, "if we were dating," and put her into that scenario, when he knows how she feels?? she was only trying to be nice the other times she offered him advice and he takes it a step too far and that's what bothers me. that we don't see an apology for that. i don't think ricky is the scum of the earth or that he committed this awful crime or anything like that. some people hate him for this and i don't. i still love him a lot. i just think this is part of a pattern we see with ricky not really being a great person for Gina. Like gina was clearly struggling all those other times she saw him yet she had to be the one being there for him and his struggles and his relationship issues. he still hasn't done that much for her in return.

Also, okay, so I guess I shouldn't have said a whole season because apparently Ricky making Gina feel like crap for half a season is better? Again, still worse than a one-night case of miscommunication. In my mind, it felt like the whole season because I remember Gina being upset about/uncomfortable about it for a while.

I understand Ricky was going through a lot and I don't think he realised how much he was hurting Gina, which is why I don't hate him, and I do think him being a teenager with a lot on his plate factors into his decisions and should give him some grace (again it doesn't excuse his actions but make them more understandable). Doesn't change the fact that he knew how Gina felt, he knew she cared about him so much that she was crying last season (yes part of that had to do with leaving but it also had to do with leaving him specifically), and he still disregarded her feelings versus EJ's decision was fueled by taking what he was told were her feelings by into account

So no, I don't think we should be holding these things against ricky. it's just that he doesn't have a pattern of treating gina well and on top of that hasn't apologised and also hasn't done that much to be the one pursuing her. that's my problem.