#also me when Nintendo didn't make him fucking playable

[fenriraa]

me with Astor

[game-boy-pocket]

So... Nintendo Direct thoughts I guess.

I joined a little late, so honestly, I just fast forwarded through all the games I didn't care about. Kinda the way to go tbh.

I still don't know about pokemon man. Everyone is saying "Yeah it's poorly made but it's one of their better games in a long time" but like I don't know how much I trust a pokemon fan's opinion on that that... you know I preordered Violet, after Legends Arceus left a good impression on me. But I cancelled it after some financial harships started happening and now I feel like I dodged a bullet.

Sonic Super Stars is looking pretty good, I really... really wish Fang was playable... I know he's a bad guy but I love him so much and have always wanted him to be playable... I'm just glad he's back at all, and his 3D model looks decent.

That "Saturday Morning Cartoon" inspired game intrigues me but like they shouldn't have had the boring Nintendo Direct narrator talking over the trailer and let the game speak for itself, show it's personality a little... does it have cheesy filmation style dialogue?? Also their villain looks kind of lame compared to like, Skeletor or Prime Evil.

Still not sure about Splatoon 3. It just looks like more of the same to me, I am kind of curious, but at the same time, it feels too late to start now... then again, if the game really is as samey as it looks, I could probably just coast on what I know from Splatoon 1 and 2.

I have no interest in Detective Pikachu as a franchise and the fact that his personality just seems to be "I love coffee" does not endear me to the character.

Super Mario RPG

Holy Fucking Shit

I didn't think the maniacs would do it.

When I heard the rumors I was like "Yeah right... this does not fit in line with the current corporate image of Mario, they're not gonna do it, and if they do, they'll butcher the art style"

I was so fucking wrong, it looks amazing. They even made Mario all squat and pudgy like the original game, I love it so much, and it looks like there are new cinematics... possibly even entirely new sections of the game what with Bowser riding his Clown car with the others.... that or they're new special attacks. I can't fucking wait you guys it looks so fucking good, I hope they consider making it a franchise again. I still have the original game but I am going to buy this day one.

We even saw Boshi briefly, and the spines still have their weird shapes. I have no reason to believe they'll change Terrapins into standard looking Koopa Troopas now. Literally all my fears are gone.

Don't know what to think about the Peach game. I make it no secret, I'm kind of over the whole arts and crafts aesthetic in games and a game that's just a stage play seems no different. I'm not even sure what kind of game it is. I just would have wanted another platformer. I guess I have to see more.

Luigi's Mansion 2 coming to Switch is a pleasant surprise. I wonder if we're going to enter an age of 3DS ports, because I can think of several 3DS games I want to see on Switch. Kid Icarus and A Link Between Worlds chief among them Luigi's Mansion 2 is my least favorite in the series, but it's still a good time. It not being on handheld makes me more likely to replay it. I do think they could have enhanced the visuals a little more though.

Too little too late with Batman. I already bought it on PC. I would have bought the Arkham Trilogy day one if it launched earlier in the Switch's life. But i'm glad the option is there for people.

I'll be honest I thought Dragon Quest Monsters looked pretty "meh", and I don't know if it's just a bad trailer or what, but the fact that the Solo, the Hero from DQIV shows up, immediately got my interest, he hs my fave hero design, and I was happy he was a skin in Smash Bros... still, man, this looks like a 3DS game... How can they be releasing this after Dragon Quest XI?? Also, is the playable character the bad guy from DQIV? I played the NES version so I didn't really see his human form.

Not much to say about Pikmin. It looks like Pikmin. Which is a good thing. But I don't know how eager I am to play it. Not a day one purchase, but an eventual purchase.

I am tempted by the Metal Gear Solid collection but it has so much extra shit that I don't really need which probably jacks up the price and I think I might prefer playing MGS1 on a CRT anyway. But man it's jsut been so long since I played Metal Gear that I don't even care I just want a way to play it. I'm just glad it's not a fucking Cloud game.

Penny's Big Breakaway had my attention just from the character designs, it screams Playstation 1 platformer. Like Mega Man Legends or Tail Concerto or something. And it's a 3D platformer... but when I heard the Sonic Mania team is working on this, i'm all in. I just wish the enemies weren't just a bunch of dopey looking birds, I want a least some kind of cool factor in the game. But yes I will be keeping my eye on this one.

Mario Kart 8 DLC looking okay. I expected Petey. He's cool I guess but i'm not gonna play as him. I'll be happy to see him on the track though. He was kind of a big part of Mario History in the Gamecube and Wii era.... Wiggler though? Meh... and KAMEK. He should have been in the base game imo, he should be a mainstay in every spinoff, he should have been introduced with the Yoshi's Island course... I'm very happy to have Kamek here. The course looks interesting too. Glad it appears to be another new course.

The new Wario Ware....... looks like Smooth Moves 2. Was the boring Nintendo Direct Narrator doing a Wario voice or did Wario get a new voice actor?? Anyway. I'll keep an eye on this. Smooth Moves was my 2nd Fave Wario Ware game, so this shows potential.

I was pretty bummed out when they mentioned Tears of the Knigdom, and it was only to announce some Amiibos... I still can't even find the Link Amiibo. They look nice though. It will be nice to have a Ganondorf Amiibo that doesn't look like shit. ( No offense to TP Ganondorf fans, but you gotta admit, the first wave f Smash Bros Amiibos is kind of rough ) ...I hope this isn't a deconfirmation of DLC. I really want more of this game, now that the main story is done and my list of side quests is rapidly shrinking, I'm getting sad about the inevitable end of one of my fave Zeldas.

And the big one

Super Mario Wonder

I'll admit I was disappointed that it was doing 3D again instead of a hand drawn style...

But the characters look so good now. They actually look more like 3D models of Koichi Kotabe's artwork. Mario and co are so expressive, their stances are not nearly as boring as the New Super Mario Bros games, their animations are so good, calling back to Mario 3 and Mario World with the blurry feet and airplane run, Mario actually HAS facial expressions now... and holy shit is fucking DAISY playable? Without sacrificing Toad? This is pretty huge! The enemies are looking really cool and stylized too, they all seem to have gotten model upgrades!

I will say... this is reminding me a little bit of Kirby Return to Dreamland, which... is worrying to me. That "wonder Flower" reeks of a Kirby gimmick, and I honestly find that Kirby's gimmicks lately just kind of slow the flow of the game, and often times just feel like all flash and no substance. "ooh I destroyed a hole room of enemies with a really big sword that I was forced to pick up" like I don't actually feel like I accomplished anything with that... I hope I'm wrong.

Also, I heard the rumor that there would be elephants... I don't like elephants. I thought I'd hate Elephant Mario... but you know what, he makes me smile.

I am so excited for this game.

This was definitely one of the better Nintendo Directs in a while, it won't top the back to back Banjo in Smash and Tears of the Kingdom reveal for me, but i'm pretty happy with what's on the horizon.

[dirtyoldmanhole]

time for analyzing the absolute most freak-ass set of supports i have ever seen nintendo handle (affectionately)

A-support first since this got overly long, and i also touch on the JP versions as well.

half meta analysis, half lengthy shitpost because.

well ~

Last time in the Gunter/Corrin support train, we learned that Gunter used a little toy ball to coax Corrin out from her shell post the mind wipes when she was as skittish as a kitten, and then in the B support, Gunter/Corrin played catch again for the first time.

A little odd, but fairly tame. Here though ..... :')

(pardon me for the different "Corrin" look -- i ripped these screenshots off of a youtube version b/c i was lazy about not getting into the game proper) god do you know how many random ass files i have as reference for gunter JP/EN voicelines, JP/EN my room bits, transcripts, sprites, etc ... after this fic is done i'm totally making that fanshrine if only to stick all this shit in one place lol

anyway, corrin starts this bright and peppy and eager for more.

eyebrow waggle-/shot

cute. :D

(the stretching's cute, too. like, more seriously, this isn't just wind-down/playtime, you can tell he's always incorporated this subtly as part of her training, likely modifying some soldier's training in a manner a little bit more befitting of her.)

they keep going...

Corrin: Ready as I'll ever be! There's no way I'm missing one of your throws! Gunter: All right, then. Here we go. Corrin: And easily caught. I have to say, Gunter, you have excellent form and follow-through. You know, I just remembered… Wasn't this ball made from a whip? Gunter: It was indeed. A pretty odd choice for material, I know… Corrin: Gunter… Would you be willing to tell me a few stories from when I was growing up? I still have a lot of holes in my memory from when I was little. Gunter: Of course. But you'll have to pay attention to the ball at the same time!

i do find it interesting garon was keeping tabs enough on corrin to have opinions on how she was being raised, but not close enough that she has any recollection of him.

now for an absolutely wtf level of fridge horror: there's a part of the same JP lines above that made me sit way the fuck up.

Gunther: Of course. Then, as we’re playing… On that day, King Garon was in an incredibly terrible mood… He handed me this whip. He told me that until you were obedient, I was to continue whipping you.

"continue whipping" [record scratch] wait what the fuck

... i think that implies that garon was whipping corrin before she was she was sent to the tower?? man what the hell kind of life did corrin have between being kidnapped out of hoshido and before ending up in the northern fortress under gunter's aegis.

gunter's no saint, not in the least bit (i have sooooooo many issues with the side of fandom who thinks he's just a sweet wholesome old grandpa lmao lol looooooooooooool no), but damn did he sure protect her from the worst of krakenburg.

okay this is interesting

a) she doesn't trust her memory like, at all. it's wild to think that gunter's literally likely the one dude that remembers her early lived life the best considering her other retainers (jakob/flora/felicia) were kids even slightly younger than she was, the hoshidan siblings were really young as well, and no other playable nohrian character was around much other than the occasional visit, post her kidnapping.

it's a little terrifying to think about how (i guess, if you interpret the game that way?) anankos was possessing him way back when and had free reign around corrin. that's kind of why i'm not totally in love with that interpretation (that'd be the perfect time for anankos to take out/corrupt corrin. why didn't he?).

anyway

b) that 'closed off' line says a lot from him, considering Gunter's hardly a socialite, either. in fact their whole support chain was framed around corrin seeking him out because he starkly seeks out alone time so much that it's a little ... isolating.

so like, if mister 'nah i don't need to be around people' is saying that, sheesh. i dabble in it with this slowburn fic, but i could almost see corrin being selectively mute at times, and hiding from people days at a time.

their dynamic ain't normal by any means but you can see how that kind of early-stage trauma bonding on both of their sides would influence [gestures at] everything, you know?

gunter's not just a father("figure"). or just a combat instructor. or just a mentor, or later, just a lover -- he's something that's more, even all combined. there's a hardwired sense of trust and codependency that's seared into them from the get-go.

(it's fucked up! god it's fun to write though.)

so i ambled away from my computer at this line while screenshotting these and only afterwards realized that this out of context sounds like a goddamn porno LMAO

[whispers] what in the fuckity fuck nintendo

corrin, sweetie.....

...................how in the fuck are we supposed to read that with a straight face sjkhshajhjhjjh

lol. lmao.

okay [drags hands down face and cackles]

so this is right about where i really have to say i genuinely cannot see their (romantic) relationship being anything but a kink relationship. (and i say this in the fic notes but it's not the 'bdsm acronym pasta garbage' sense, and it's not in the 50 shades of grey cliche 24/7 M/s sense either, god i cannot fucking stand the cliche version of that shit. shoot me if i ever write that.)

and i say that for several reasons.

one - if you're shipping them, their mutual power dynamics are so hopelessly tangled between them and it's the one language -- in a way -- that they both "speak" later on that is uniquely equipped to handle a lot of that and the trauma junk from both of them in a private, loving, dignifying way. i genuinely mean that, too. rev's possession arc with him, corrin recovering from the mind wipes, etc. they're gonna have to face a lot of unpleasant shit together, and actively grappling at and mutually playing with those realities is, in a complex way, hell of a lot healthier than simply pretending it doesn't exist in the first place.

(two - metatextually i think nintendo intentionally encouraged a kink flavor to gunter/corrin because this ship does squick the fuck out of most other people and i'm not totally unsympathetic to that, so i think it's a way of quickly weeding out everyone except the folks who are genuinely here for this in an unironic sense. )

three - i already wrote up kink analysis re: gunter here lol (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ

four - and sorta on this note, what's interesting is... with a lot of kinksters i know, they knew they vibed differently in that way really early on, even as kids. like even in stupid silly make believe play games they'll tie up barbies in random ass ways or discover in a genuinely innocent way that they like specific sensations of pain they can control. later on as adults, a lot of times the brain wires go [bzzt] and suddenly the world of power or sensation play makes a hell of a lot more sense, and frankly, is a lot more fun in certian sexy arenas of life. sometimes it comes along with trauma junk, sometimes it doesn't, it's not a binary thing (as basically everything isn't).

THAT IS A LOT OF WORDS TO SAY corrin also inadvertently being wired that way and having these little semi-accidental lines doesn't actually surprise me that much. (i can also see this specific line being a little bit of a 'hrmm' flag for gunter in that she's not going to run away instantly screaming at the idea of playing these specific kinds of games, later on once when/if they're romantic)

am i projecting a little? fuck yes, that's what we're here for

Gunter: Indeed. I knew that striking you wouldn't ever get you to open up to anyone. So I came up with a different method - one that used this ball. I returned to your room sometime later, and I rolled the ball over to you. Corrin: Which I immediately picked up, examined, and threw back to you. Gunter: Oh, you remember this part? Good.

that actually is incredibly wholesome she remembers this part. ;a; you know gunter was always probably lowkey sad at her not remembering key parts of her childhood, regardless or not if it was moments between them or not.

wheeze

so did you know, treehouse actually neutered this down from the JP version which was straight up, i shit you not:

Gunther: …It’s nostalgic… It really is. Kamui: …How long has it been since? I’ve always considered you like my real father, Gunther-san.

l u l "real father"""""

i'm dying man

every single goddamn time i think this ship can't possibly get more fucked up IT DOES

YOU STRAIGHT UP MARRY YOUR DAD IN THE JP VERSION LMAO

it would be hilarious enough just knowing the whole existence of a (married) S-support coming up but coming right after the heels of that THE BALL WAS A WHAT realization.... hee

anyway here's the last chunk:

Gunter: You… You are much too kind. Ah, now look at what you've made me do. Corrin: Gunter! It's rare that you miss a catch. Gunter: My sincerest apologies. There was… something in my eye. Corrin: Getting sentimental in your old age? Hang on, I'll get you a handkerchief.

damn girl, 'sentimental in your old age'. you vicious! :D

it is horrible of me but every time i think about the end of this support i bust out HYSTERICALLY LAUGHING for a completely different reason since if you headcanon Gunter as always holding a flame for/romantically harboring feelings for Corrin-

CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT HIS THOUGHTS WERE TO THAT ""FATHER" LINE LMAO

on one hand: 'i'm special to her :'))))'

on the other: [ O H K O ]

anyway half of what makes the A-support peak fridge-[everything] is the S-support right after ~ coming soon!

[game-boy-pocket]

Nintendo Direct Thoughts

I just woke up and had a look, not expecting much given this is one of those "we're at the end of the Switch's life" Directs but honestly I was surprised.

We start with a brand new Mario and Luigi game... we've been getting lots of remakes for Mario RPGs but this is a new one and honestly was the one I expected to get a new game the least out of all of them. To tell the truth I would have preferred a continuation of SMRPG or a new traditional Paper Mario over this, cuz a party made up of just Mario and Luigi was novel when Luigi wasn't appearing in as many games but now it feels boring by comparison. I wish they would do more with the idea of adding on surprise guest party members, like how the 2nd game had the Baby Bros and the Third game had Bowser, then Paper Mario, but after that it just a weird version of Luigi? idk man. This looks neat, I'm glad the franchise isn't dead. I'll think about picking it up. Probably not a day 1 purchase. I do hope other Mario RPGs have a chance at continuing too though.

I still think the Nintendo World Championships is pointless.

Not interested in Fairy Tail, I only ever read a bit of the Manga, I'd like to check out the anime but lisenced anime games are a hard sell for me. Wish they'd just make another One Piece Grand Battle style game.

Don't care about Fantasian, Nintendo Switch Sports has a bad reputation and I don't care about sports anyway so that's a pass, pass on Mio, pass on Disney, pass on Hello Kitty, give me a sequel to the Keroppi platformer for the NES and then we'll talk, It's weird to see Loney Tunes in a video game. That Porky Pig voice was rough. I don't have hopes for it, Don't care about Among Us or Farmagia...

Donkey Kong Country Returns... not a new game, and they didn't announce any new playable characters or features aside from levels from the 3DS version, and I wish they gave DK and Diddy more of a facelift, but i'll take it, a way to play DKCR on the big screen, hopefully without the motion controls, is a win... but please Nintendo.... give us a new DK game...

Dragon Quest III 2DHD. I am very mixed about the whole 2D HD thing, I don't think it looks good. Never have. This looks a lot better than Octopath to me but I still don't like it. Also, I respectfully disagree with Mr. Horii. Playing the games in chronological order is not the best way to experience the Erdrick Trilogy, and that's a pretty dumb thing to say. That's like telling someone to read a Murder Mystery but start with the final chapter. The big twist in DQ3 will be meaningless to those who haven't played, at the very least, DQ1... I'm glad all 3 games are getting the treatment. I am a big fan of the trilogy so even though I don't care for the whole 2D HD thing, I'll pick it up, and who knows, maybe the style will grow on me.

Funko is a fucking joke. I'm ehh about Luigi's Mansion 2 but I might pick it up anyway if I have extra cash burning a hole in my pocket and I really want a new game. Don't care about Denpa Men, Would prefer Traditional Metal Slug, Don't care about Darkest Dungeon, Don't care about NSO but it's nice that those games are now available for people, Phantom Braves has a cute art style but i'm not interested in the gameplay, Marvsl and Capcom arcade collection might be worth a look but idk, I'm no good at fighting games, so i'd only be in it for the beat em ups.

I tried to like Mario Party but I just can't get into that style of game. I want to like it because I love the Mario series but it's just not fun for me, either with friends or going it alone, I hate board games irl, making them video games doesn't actually help, and I think the minigames are just not fun and over too quickly.

I wish I was excited about our first new 2D Zelda in a long time. But Link has always been...ugh... I guess you could call him a "comfort character" for me. I never liked Princess Zelda that much, and I enjoy the combat in Zelda games a lot, so a game without Link and without Combat.... I am apprehensive. The one thing that might save this game for me is that it has hints of monster taming. Not like... real monster taming, you're creating copies, so it's not like your bonding with monster companions, but it's still monster vs monster, and that's something I'd love to see expanded on. Give me a full on Zelda monster tamer.... I hope this isn't "The new direction for 2D Zelda" the way BOTW is for 3D Zelda though. I was kinda hoping 2D Zelda would keep traditional Zelda alive while 3D Zelda continued being open air.

More headlines, I don't care about just dance, never was a fan of legos, stray was interesting when it was first announced but the novelty wore off after watching ppl play it, there's a lot of games like lately. Don't care about the Hobbit, and i'm sorry, I'm sorry, I know I don't care about a lot of things and I know t he franchise has a lot of fans but I just don't care about Ace Attourney. And don't care about Hunted Line, looks edgy. I know SaGa has a legacy, but I'd prefer to try an older game before thinking about checking out a new one.

Metroid Prime 4 looks interesting. We have Sylux with some Metroids following him around. We have orchestral sounding music. It's definitely Metroid Prime alright. Can't wait to play it for myself.

Despite how often I said "don't care" I'd call this a good direct.

TLDR, Metroid is the most exciting thing there, I'm happy for the DKCR remake, I'm apprehensive about Zelda but I'm gonna try it. Mario and Luigi i'll probably pick up some day.