#also like yes i have the headcanon zhang qiling is still a disaster in the kitchen

[elletromil]

So last prompt for @unexpected-nightview (or at least last from this particular series of prompts XD)

Since it was left up to me, I decided on no ship (at least not in the forefront) and to play a bit with two characters I think could have a super interesting dynamic

--

“You’re a terrible cook.”

Tiezui walks into the kitchen just in time to put out the fire.

“What do you think you’re doing?!”

“Food,” Zhang Qiling succinctly explains in his habitual manner, as he lets Tiezui push him away from the stove.

Tiezui stares at the still smoking pan now resting at the bottom of the sink for a short moment before looking back at the other man.

“Aiya, Xiaoge,” he shakes his head in saddened disbelief, “ to qualify as ‘food’, it needs to be edible.”

Zhang Qiling shrugs lightly, apparently unconcerned by such mores.

“You’re a terrible cook,” Tiezui snorts, amused in spite of himself and judging from the slight tilt of his head, Zhang Qiling doesn’t dispute the claim.

Now he understands why Wang Pangzi had threatened Zhang Qiling so colourfully whenever he approached the kitchen the few days Tiezui had had to share a safe house with the Iron Triangle a couple of years ago.

If this is the usual result of Zhang Qiling’s attempts at cooking, he can see the wisdom in such a strong reaction.

And while their situation isn’t as dire as the last time, Tiezui would still rather not burn this house down before Rishan and Wu Xie find their way to them.

“I guess we’re lucky I’m not.”

Another shrug and Tiezui gets the distinct impression that, edible or not, Zhang Qiling would have eaten whatever burnt mess he would have ended up with.

It’s a wonder he hasn’t died from food poisoning yet.

Tiezui quickly rummage through the fridge and pantry, selecting ingredients for something quick but filling. He doesn’t eat that much himself, especially not when he’s still worried for his husband, but he remembers that Zhang Qiling is something akin to a black hole when it comes to food.

The nice thing about staying in one of Xie Yuchen’s safe-houses is that there is a surprising amount of fresh produce to choose from. Not that he would have snubbed instant food or cans, but Rishan has rather spoiled him over the last two years when it comes to home-cooked meals.

He sets his ingredients on the counter and push the vegetables towards Zhang Qiling along with a cutting knife. “Come on, you’re on chopping duty.”

His eyes widen with surprise at the gentle order, before eyeing the knife dubiously.

“Come on,” Tiezui insists, “I’ve seen what you can do with a blade. You can definitely chop some vegetables. You’ll get to eat faster if you help.”

Zhang Qiling looks up from the knife to stare at him, silently expressing his skepticism at Tiezui’s faith in his skills.

It’s a mistake.

He’s trying too hard to sell the narrative of his ineptitude and unfortunately for him, Tiezui is neither Wu Xie nor Wang Pangzi. He doesn’t get fooled easily, even by a Zhang.

Yes, everyone has their own limitations in life. But you don’t get to live as long as Zhang Qiling without picking a few basic skills. Even with the memory loss, the other man is stubborn enough that he’d quickly learn again whatever he’s forgotten.

And while the Iron Triangle spend a lot of time together, it’s a known fact that Zhang Qiling sometimes goes off on his own for extended period of times. And Tiezui rather doubts there would be that many people willing to feed him during those expeditions of his. Or that Zhang Qiling would even trust anyone enough to accept their food.

“Don’t worry, even if you help, your secret is safe with me,” Tiezui reassures him with a roll of his eyes. “Anyway, even if I told them, I don’t think it would change anything. They like being able to take care of you too much for that.”

That’s one of the first thing anyone notices about the Iron Triangle. How much they care about each other. In a tomb, it’s slightly more obvious with Zhang Qiling’s propensity to push the other two behind him and take head on whatever is threatening them on his own, but that’s only part of it.

If you were to ask Tiezui, what really shows the level of Zhang Qiling’s commitment to his two friends is his willingness to let them take care of him. It’s in how he accepts them worrying over him, even if they all know that there’s very little that is actually a challenge to him. It’s in the small contented smiles he can’t never quite hide from someone watching closely whenever Wu Xie and Wang Pangzi nags at him to eat or sleep more.

Tiezui is used to the Zhangs. He’s married to one after all.

They don’t like having to rely on anyone but themselves. They don’t like appearing weak.

A Zhang willingly showing any kind of vulnerability is a show of trust. It’s a proof of devotion.

It’s just too bad that they’re so emotionally stunted. They never completely realise that the people who want to take care of them understand that perfectly. They never realise that those same people would rather rip their own heart out of their chest than to ever betray them.

“It’s either that or you wash the dishes afterwards.”

There’s the tiniest moue of disgust appearing on his face before Zhang Qiling picks up the knife and Tiezui wisely says nothing.

They work in silence for a minute or two before Tiezui starts chattering about this and that, unperturbed by the lack of response from his companion. That he is staying at all to help is acknowledgement enough from any Zhang he’s ever known.

[puppy-phum]

For the character ask thing: Xiaoge!! (I know technically you've written a lot of meta about him already, but still! I always like hearing your thoughts about him ^^)

now you’ve done did it ashen. i think am having an existential crisis over this bc HOW do i even feel about this man? how do i put all of this into words?? and i know i’ve written some meta and wrote that fic too but i just always learn new things about him and everything about him seems to be so tightly in relation to wu xie that. this is going to be hard. but bear with me, okay? 

give me a character

(placing under a cut!)

How I feel about this character

Like I said, it’s hard to put into words how I feel about Xiaoge. He is, even in my mind, bigger than just one man. I don’t blame Wu Xie (and others too) for thinking of him as some type of god. Because what else is he but the most humane god their world has ever seen? 

But that aside, Xiaoge is... very tragic for me. Wu Xie is that too, of course, we have talked about this and NPSS has said that they both are tragic, but Xiaoge is tragic even before Wu Xie has technically even been born. There is the misery of lost lifetimes in him, the grief of lost people. He has been so many things and he can’t even remember. He has been so many people throughout his long life – though, sometimes he hasn’t been allowed to be a person at all. He hasn’t been allowed to become a person. So, somehow, he is just eternally in the making. He is never fully a person in the middle of his amnesia and other people using him and his duty for his own family. 

And still, he manages to be so unapologetically himself. Somehow, he manages to be so unique and stay away from every social norm that it’s almost admirable (yes I admire him being a social disaster haha). So I think my foremost feeling about him is just. Pride? I am proud of him for persisting, for doing his thing, for continuing forward. Even if that’s something that is in his blood and isn’t always his choice. But I am still proud of him for keeping his head and his humanity. Underneath all that coldness, there is a warm heart and I love him for that. He is so many things when he’s allowed to be. And I know that he can be cruel and that he kills people without remorse but he is not evil. He is not a demon. He is probably the most innocent of them all. He has so much blood in his hands but can he really be blamed for any of it? I don’t know. But I am happy that he is, in some ways, brave enough to figure that out. 

All the people I ship romantically with this character

To be honest, I can’t really ship Xiaoge with anyone else than Wu Xie. They are just meant to be, and before and after Wu Xie, this man will not love like that again. They are made of the same soul. There is no one else for Xiaoge. 

My non-romantic OTP for this character

This varies a lot more than the romantic one :’D Because first of all, I adore Xiaoge and Pangzi. Their friendship is just amazing and I am so happy that we’ve gotten to see more of that! I love it that with Pangzi, Xiaoge gets to joke around in his own stony way, that he gets to pull his pranks, gets to be himself. I love it that Pangzi manages to lure this playful side out of him and then gets absolutely stunned when Xiaoge turns it against him XD They are hilarious and I know you think the same :’)

Then, I also love Xiaoge with Liu Sang. That is a more delicate friendship as both of them are not that good with emotions or words or physical contact. But I adore it how Xiaoge kind of just. Takes Liu Sang under his wing? Without knowing anything about this man. Because I still believe that it’s Xiaoge who takes Liu Sang into their circle first, that it’s Xiaoge who sees through Liu Sang, who starts poking him open with one knowing look after another. It’s him who gets Liu Sang to trust them and then to stay. It’s him who somehow gets Liu Sang to accept a home (and I love that because Xiaoge has been there, he knows the pain of being an outsider, and then Wu Xie brought him in and gave him a home and now he’s allowed to do that to someone else? That’s growth). 

The third one on the list is Hei Xiazi. We haven’t seen much of them but they obviously know each other, and I love it how Hei Xiazi is just allowed to tease the great Zhang Qiling like it’s not a big deal. I can imagine the Mystic Nine families gawking at him when they hear it. Hei Xiazi calls their Zhang patriarch “Yaba Zhang” to their faces and they are about to throw hands and maybe scream, and Xiaoge himself only raises a brow and almost smiles. Wu Xie is laughing his ass off. Also, please, I need some immortal bros shenanigans because no one will believe that actually happened 

My unpopular opinion about this character

Wow, once again I don’t even know what are popular opinions when it comes to Xiaoge? But hmm. 

I could maybe mention that I hate how badly he’s been sexualized as a character. His official art designs are evidence of this (one of the reasons why I don’t really own any official merch). Everyone is so damn horny about him (and don’t get me wrong, all of his actors are good-looking but cmon!) and sometimes it makes me wince because as a character, it somehow doesn’t even make sense for him to appear like this to everybody? Like, yeah, he’s fit because of what he does and what he’s been made to do but. Yeah ok, maybe I can’t really argue sigh. 

Though, personally, I am also very cautious when it comes to me thinking about him sexually or his sexual preferences. He feels too complex and... far away? From me? For me to be harboring any headcanons about that. But yeah, I can live without him taking his shirt off in every adaptation. I adore his tattoo but it’s enough for me to see it during scenes where it’s relevant to the plot. Am more concerned about his health lol 

(Please I hope that no one takes any offense to this, I am just not that into fanservice personally) 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

Pingxie kiss!! Anytime!!!! Okay, I’m kidding (partly). But like, would anyone be opposed to this? They are practically married anyway. 

Otherwise... Him pondering about his experiences behind the Bronze Gate? I’ve heard that in the novels, Xiaoge doesn’t really experience any trauma afterward which just. Sounds very unlikely? And I know he has enough of trauma already and enough pain to carry but that is the experience I’m the most intrigued of. It is just such a big part of him, just like that decade is a big part of Wu Xie’s character too. So I always wish we saw him more connected to that time? Reboot never gave us anything about that really. I’m kind of sad about that because seeing Xiao Yuliang’s Xiaoge in Ultimate Note made him so real and while Huang Junjie is amazing in Reboot (still the softest Xiaoge to date!!), he lacks depth. That version of Xiaoge has been once again stripped off of his humanity and it feels very cruel when he still has a bigger role in all of that than just the role of a protector and cool fighter. He’s still a person. He deserves to have his own struggles and his own feelings and thoughts when it comes to him and the whole story and Wu Xie who is damn dying while Xiaoge loves him so much. So yeah, that maybe 

thank you for sending me this ask ♥ i will probably answer your other one tomorrow! i hope you enjoyed my blabberings ^^