#also it got rlly angsty SORRY I don't like deviating from canon and Remus is an only child and his life is sad

[ronanwazlib]

Request: maybe Remus has a little sister who is the flower girl at his wedding (marrying Sirius?)

Sirius’ hands shook as his fingers stumbled over the buttons at his collar.

“Are you nervous, mate?” Ron asked, and with a quick flick of his wand, finished off the rows of open buttons trailing down Black’s chest.

“Thanks.” Sirius breathed, and then scrubbed a hand over his face, the stark light of the dressing room illuminating his cheekbones with a shiny pallor. “Nah. Me? Nervous? Course not… Just worried it’ll be even worse than the first time.”

“Wait… what happened the first time?” One Of the boys, he thinks maybe one of Harry’s, chimes in from where he’s allowing Arthur to polish his shoes via magical grease.

Sirius barks out a brisk laugh, thinking back to the day. They’d never thought of getting married, not really. Being together after everything was enough for them. They’d survived his family’s prejudices, lycanthropy, becoming animagi as children, the Prank, Hogwarts, and were on their way to fight a bloody war, and still their fondness of each other never faltered. That was enough for them, he’d thought. They didn’t need rings or declarations or charmed wedding cake toppers at that. But then Lily and James had gotten engaged, and they’d each done their fair share planning the slapdash wedding, no matter how small-scale. And as they all shed tears that day which felt a bit more anxious than happy, the mood overall was too “This life is semi-permanent” rather than “this love will last forever” and seeing Moony preen over a slice of chocolate wedding cake (one layer especially made for him by the Potter’s overly fond house elf) and knowing they might not have each other forever, Sirius suddenly wanted this. Wanted just one moment of time that could be theirs forever, link them together once more in case the other ties that bound their hearts frayed and tethers were torn apart.

So following the Potter’s frantic summer wedding, Remus and Sirius had their own, even more thrown together and hasty. Lily was fuming of course because “of all the stupid and daft ideas” they had to go wanting an autumn wedding literal weeks before she gave birth? She still helped them plan it all anyways. It was a rather small affair, held in the field outside one of the Order’s safehouses.

Their friends from the Order, those alive anyways, all attended, as did Dumbledore, which was odd because of all the things they’d never have figured, it would be their former headmaster in support of their union while danger lurked and there was a battle to be won. They’d all supposed he just enjoyed a good party that much until Minerva had found all those letters he’d written to Grindlewald as a boy, sealed within a compartment of his desk, and realized why it was so important to him. The Blacks were not informed of the occasion, partly because many of them were Deatheaters, but mostly because Sirius would rather vomit out his own organs than see any of them again, besides Andy, but it was too rushed for her and Ted to come.

Remus wore a lovely suit sewn for him by Molly Prewitt out of his dad’s old wedding attire, and Sirius wore Fleamont’s best dress robes, as he didn’t quite think he could squeeze into the tiny Hope Howell’s decadent white gown (although he did try). Only Lyall himself was in attendance, looking aged and rather small in his chair, Remus’ mother having died while they were finishing school. And Remus’ young sister, just nearly six years old by that time.

She’d been quite the surprise, born in the winter of their third year just before hols. A thirteen year old Remus hadn’t even know his mother was pregnant, he got a letter by owl the week before their vacation began revealing all to him so as to avoid total shock upon his arrival back to the family home, which was, at the time somewhere in Northern England. They’d had to move for much of his childhood to avoid suspicion, but once he began at Hogwarts, his parents were able to be stationary for much longer with him gone most of the year. But after what had happened, his father’s guilt and the rift it drove between his parents, not to mention his mother’s hesitance to let her only son go off to wizard school and the overall taxation of having a lycanthropic son would all be things he would have assumed would have prevented any further offspring. But then, there she was in his arms that Christmas morning, little baby Rudina.

Moony wasn’t much for children, Sirius recalled. He was too worried he’d drop them or hurt them, and the fact that he spent most of his own time as one in pain and hiding rather than around other kids made him awkward about how to interact. But, damn, if he didn’t love Rudie. She walked down the aisle at their wedding, shrugging around in the garishly poofy white… thing… Marlene had stuffed her in, trying to precisely toss out exactly 4 petals each time her hand dipped into the basket of tiny star jasmine. She had her mother’s wispy hair, the same goldenrod hue as her brother, and like him her skin had a bronze undertone, but rather than being littered with scars, it was blessedly (in Moony’s opinion, since Sirius loved every scar because it was part of him) sprinkled with hundreds of freckles. Her gap toothed grin beamed up at her adored sibling as she scattered petals down the makeshift aisle, before Sirius approached, lead by James as they both tried not to think about how Fleamont hadn’t done this for either of them.

The ceremony was short, Dumbledore spoke the words to marry them. Of course, their marriage was in spirit only; registered werewolves were forbidden from spousal unions, and even if they weren’t, Moony’s match would have had to be a woman to be recognized under Ministry laws. But it had been a good day, despite the rushed cobbling together of everything, the absence of so many loved ones, the way Sirius had felt Remus’ grip on his wrist tighten to the point of discomfort as he slid on the silver band engraved with tiny stars.

“What didn’t go wrong, honestly…” Sirius joked in reply to the boy, whom he now realized was Teddy himself, his stepson. And it was true… They went straight back after that one night. No honeymoon period did soldiers get, and sleeping side by side in the same bed they’d shared since leaving school in their dingy London flat, it almost felt like he’d dreamed the entire affair. In truth, Remus had been acting strange for a while, and it seemed as though having the ring encircling one finger served as a constant reminder of the bond he was betraying; he was coarse and irritable from then on.

Harry was born, and Sirius and Remus were both swept up in that joy for such a short time before Dumbledore appeared in their fireplace with grim tidings of a prophecy, and the Potters went into hiding. Acting as Secret-Keeper and saving James from his incessant restlessness and terror consumed so much of his time, but being honest Sirius didn’t mind as it kept him from pondering well into many a sleepless night where his husband was going off to in secret, and why he’d heard tellings that the “Lupin boy” had finally gone round to the dark side. When he did return, climbing beneath the covers with all the silence of the weight settled between them, Sirius bit his lip until it bled, trying to ignore the foreign scent of smoke and wood and musk which lingered in his lover’s hair, in the lines on his skin, and forbid himself to think it was that of Fenrir Greyback or some other such devil.

Handing his duty over to Pete, who was ever more elusive following his role as groomsman, he had no reason to leave the house. He went out into Muggle London when he could force himself to leave his bed. The whole world seemed awash in runny slate greys and deep blue. He got tattoos… a lot of them, just to feel something, and worked on his bike. But not even hands covered in violet bruises and engine grease couldn’t entice a hold, and his rows with Remus grew in increasing frequency, although after a while his responses became automatic, and within he only felt lost and tired. His brother died, he saw the obit in the Prophet. There was probably a funeral… he wasn’t invited. He spent the entire day after he found out on the Tonk’s couch, while his young cousin petted and braided ribbons into his unkept locks.

One morning in spring, Rudie began showing signs of magic. She knocked a stack of books off the shelf in her father’s study from the kitchenette. Lyall called Remus right away, because directly after the little girl had collapsed. Rudie had always been a frail child; she’d come a bit early but St. Mungo’s had given their all into saving both her and the mother from harm, though her birth weakened Hope considerably… and a few short years later, nearing the Marauders final terms, she’d succumbed to cancer and left her two cariads behind. Now it seemed the strain magic had on her slight frame was too much, and she took to bed often, where sometimes pillows would fluff themselves, or handkerchiefs would fly above her sweating head of their own accord. That simmering summer brought a fresh wave of the dragon pox which had robbed James and Sirius of the two people besides their merry band of four they’d loved the most, and when it dissipated with the first crisp bite of chilly weather, Moony was an only child again. And thus the tendrils of unexpected sunshine that had beamed into his life crept beneath the cooling soil, and he was left with only the bitter embrace of the moon.

They spent much more time with Andromeda, Sirius to have some sort of mourning with his family, for his family, and Remus because he suddenly took new joy in playing and babysitting little Nymphadora, whose spunky, gaptoothed grin reminded him of Rudie’s.

Then came that fateful Halloween. And they’d buried their two best friends, begrudging trust keeping them just close enough to each hold onto infant Harry. Neither of them knew what they were doing. Even less so when Sirius knew he had to find Peter, or Remus and Harry would never be safe. When he did, it all fell to shit. Sirius lost control, and Peter was gone. Sirius met the eyes of his former headmaster as he was lead away to Azkaban, Remus shouting at the Aurors both for his release and for Harry, who was being pried from his “unfit” parental grip. Despite his high seat of power, and his knowledge of their arrangement, the only thing Sirius found in his shifting gaze was a cool acceptance which sent shivers down to his bones. In that moment he had lost all hope, and some days he couldn’t scrounge up one happy though from his cavernous skull, and had to settle for twisting the silver band round his bony knuckles so often a red ring bloomed across his blueing flesh.

Escape, freedom, a war. He returned to find Remus a broken man who dared not look him in the eyes and an empty house full of ghosts. Harry was alright, he’d ended up back with Lupin after a stint round his dreadful muggle family’s, and later a short while with Andromeda, as she was his godfather’s blood. Sirius was glad of that at least. The Dark Lord returned and was defeated. Black found Nymphadora and Remus had grown very close in his absence, a camaraderie he soon fell in step alongside after he’d wept for hours one silent night on the stairs of Grimmauld Place in his Moony’s arms, and they’d finally become the two of them again. Remus never wanted to let go of him, or have Sirius be from his sight. He’d cut his hair, just some, healed his wounds, silenced every whimper in the night with soft words and softer lips against his brow.

Tonks, as his cousin was now called, mothered him much too well for his liking, the impish grin she wore paired with her bossy jabs at him to eat. She was young, but comfortable in herself. Turned out she was like him, a family shame in more ways than one, but most especially for fancying fillies. Yet as the war grew worse and worse, she struggled with the thought that she would give up everything to its gapping maw and vanish unfulfilled. She wanted something to leave behind, a legacy beyond remnants of a cheeky greeting in young Potter’s ears and flashes of bubblegum hair tucked behind her hooped ears. She pestered Remus constantly, as he and Sirius were the only men she felt comfortable with, and both Black sheep rather wanted to end the traditional incestuous liaisons so common within their Most Noble House.

Eventually, he conceded, if only because Harry wouldn’t be young forever, and he’d found himself rather taken with fatherhood once he’d begun it. And thus, Teddy was born, with the aid of a little Mungo magic, of course. It was a rather odd arrangement if one overthought it, but then again, so much of their lives had seemed impossible. The blue haired bundle was a light in the coming darkness, and when it had passed, Sirius thought for once he might have that proper family he’d promised his godson.

And then the changing tide brought new tidings once again. The Ministry finally found a change of spell-encircled heart: The Registry was overturned, the records erased, and unions were now recognized between Muggles and Wizards of any gender, so long as they were within legal age. And thus, in their 50s, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin did one more ridiculous thing… They got married for a second time. Moony’s hair was nearly all grey now, but Padfoot had proudly retained all his ebony locks, save for one or two “distinguished” silver strands at his browline.

“Aw, don’t worry, Uncle Pads.” said Al from his spot by the long mirror, currently chanting out compliments to any who stopped to fix a stray hair or adjust a bow tie. “If ‘twere really that bad, it cant be any worse now!”

“And plus, it’s official this time!” Said Fred the Second as he tied a shoelace, and was met with a chorus of “Yea, Freddy two!” from the men in the room. Hugo made an affirmative noise, then told his cousin to stop trying to make “Fred the Second” an established nickname because it was pompous and dumb. Al and his brother laughed, chins ducked to pin on boutonnieres.

“Nah.” Sirius murmured, as they all prepared to exit, this wonderful family they’d amassed from nothing, and greet a hall full of many more important people in attendance this second time round, like Minnie at last, and the Tonks, Hagrid, Poppy, who’d always known when they were back at school because no normal “friend” spent that many nights sneaking into those uncomfortable cots in her hospital wing, nor had to be woken up tangled carefully together with the injured limbs of a still sleeping werewolf to be ushered off the morning Potions every time. Many were absent too… but this was finally their moment. No fear, or secrecy. It wasn’t a do over… it wasn’t their happy ending. It was a grateful, overjoyed beginning. Sirius pushed open the doors, Harry’s arm looped through his own, and broke out into a grin the moment Remus turned to meet his eyes, gasping out, “Pads,” as though he were seeing him with new eyes.