#also i crave an Alastor cover of Friend Like Me so bad now you don't understand

[i-write-sin-not-tragedy]

This Aladdin au is consuming me /pos

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Gardens #1 (1/1/2021)

Click here if you're like "What the heck is this about?"

Valera @autokrates fights an annoying sibling. Alastor cheers for the great show and does absolutely nothing to help. Sir Pentious @hiss-and-vinegar fusses over Valera's wounds.

Valera

*Ah, the gardens. Just the place for Valera and her brother to get into a no holds barred bareknuckle brawl away from her guests. Far enough that nobody has to hear them snapping and snarling at each other, close enough that neither has far to drag the other at the end of the dramatic little affair. Fortunately, fights don't actually take thirty minutes to muddle through for most people, these fish included. Five or so minutes of hissing and biting at their imperfect duplicates, and at the end, Valera limps away with Volitan's arm clenched in her jaws and a few pounds of flesh lighter. Neither comes away feeling better, but at least there's fresh fish to feed to the guests who craved a more cannibalistic slant to their meals.*

*The fountain is good enough to rinse the worst of this mess off, and Volitan can go let the ocean burn his wounds clean for all she cares. Her friends can't see her like this. She'll need... What, half an hour to close her wounds? They shouldn't notice.*

**Happy New Years.**

Alastor

From a high window a large crowd loudly cheers, whistles, and applauds.

It's Alastor, he's the large crowd. Him and his invisible audience.

He doesn't know what's going on but it was hella entertaining to watch.

Valera

Thank the gods Alastor was far enough away to probably not hear the undignified squeak that she made when she realized she had a witness, Valera's emotions were shot enough without embarrassment on top of it. Head jerking back to seek him out among the windows... Ah. There he is. Game face, Val, give him a thumbs up. With Volitan's arm! Lovely. In fact... She's just going to send it off to him, a little flotation between friends.

"Here! I'm going to be a while, be a dear and butcher this, would you? I'd hate to see it spoil while I cleaned up."

Alastor

Look at the delight on his face! "You're a TERRIFIC host!" He bows out the window so deeply it's impressive he doesn't fall out, then runs off with his new culinary treat. He's going to make something decadent with this.

But first he's gonna bite off a chunk from the severed end.

Sir Pentious

A certain snake is slimthering.... he is wearing the long robe that Valera gifted to him for Hissmas. He's searching for his love, now that he's properly warm and bask-ed. The smell of blood has his tongue flicking out longer, and he's drawn to it... slimther slimther...

"MY DEAR?"

Valera

The sound of Pentious' voice makes Valera tense up, swearing under her breath. What's the human phrase? Out of the frying pan, into the fire? She'd rather have Alastor and his cheerfully uncaring amusement, Pentious might actually *worry*. But it was too late to pretend nothing was wrong. So.. Time to do what she does best, then.

She perches on the edge of the fountain, posing just so to keep the worst of her injuries away from her beau's many eyes. A hand in her lap to artfully cover her thigh, tail conveniently looped around her legs before dropping back into the fountain. Natural? No. But it might be enough! Maybe! If she can distract him. "Penny! Hello dearest, enjoying the weather tonight?"

Sir Pentious

"YESSS, MY DEAR, THE WEATHER ISSS NICE. THE AIR ISSS SO GOOD HERE, A NICE CHANGE FROM SSSSULFUR." Tongue flicking, but he's definitely sure that's blood he smells... or something similar! He was used to Valera's blood, as he'd bitten her *quite a few times.*

A head tilt, and his face squishes inquisitively. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE...?"

Valera

"I'm glad to hear you're enjoying my home, my love." Her tail wiggles in the fountain, eyes scrunching up into half moons. Even if she was trying to keep him from getting too nosy, it was still nice to see him happy on Okkylk.

Right. A question. "Me? I'm sitting, obviously. You just missed Alastor though, I think he ran off to the kitchen with his latest prize."

Sir Pentious

"I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ALASSSTOR. THERE'SSS TOO MANY OF HIM HERE! BUT ONLY ONE OF YOU." He slithers closer, head tilted.

".... I SSSMELL YOUR BLOOD."

Valera

She twitches, hand lifting off her injured thigh to wave dismissively. "Yes, darling. I got into a bit of a tussle, you see. "

Sir Pentious

"A BIT?" His eyes widen and... He comes closer, trying to peer around her to see the damage.

Valera

... A choice is presented to her. Trust her fiance, or.. don't, and upset him. So, despite the immediate impulse to deflect, she reluctantly lifts her tail from the water. Or, what's left of it. The end seems to have been sliced off, gods only know where the fin went.

Sir Pentious

His eyes widen considerably, then NARROW. His hood opens and he's careful to put his arms around her, trying to mind any more wounds.

"BETTER NOT HAVE BEEN ONE OF THE *ALASSSTORSSS!!* WHO WAS IT?!"

Valera

A few scrapes and scuffs are hardly enough to keep Valera from leaning into a hug. "Alastor? No, of course not. I fought my brother! He tried to scold me again and I'd simply had enough!"

A pause as she nuzzles her face into his shoulder, purring softly. "I took his arm off, so don't feel TOO bad for me."

Sir Pentious

Ah, that *brother.* Sir Pentious growls like the cobra he is, vividly imagining tearing the man apart--not that he'd really seen him yet but he could guess.

"HE OUGHT TO THINK ABOUT HOW FORTUNATE IT ISSSS THAT YOU LET HIM LIVE!! INSSSULTING THE AUTOCRAT!! BROTHER OR NOT, HE'D BE *QUARTERED* IF HE WERE MINE."

Valera

She shrugs, lifting a leg to inspect the damage. A few cuts, nothing to write home about. Hilda would probably want to put stitches in a few of them, but Val was pretty sure they'd close on their own. They'd mostly stopped bleeding, at least. "I assume fighting with family is a normal part of having one? Maybe not physically, but Veci do tend to be more direct than humans. He doesn't like the way I do things, I don't like him acting like he knows better. We fought, I won, so I'm right."

Sir Pentious

That sounded much simpler.... But Penny couldn't help his frown. He took her hand in his, and kissed it.

"He hurt you. I would tear reality asunder for you and your smile, my love."

Valera

... Ah. Valera has to try very hard not to make a noise like a deflating balloon crossed with a dying whale, wheezing quietly and folding in at the waist as Pentious metaphorically stabs her with surprise affection straight to the heart. Thunk. Her head, thumped down to his chest. Don't look at her. Don't acknowledge her. She's feeling feelings.

Sir Pentious

He's petting down her hair, looking over her damage and that gored tail....

Penny gently pets down said tail, careful to mind the wounds.

Valera

Give her a bit to recover, and then she'll perk back up to see what he's doing there.

"Hm? Something wrong, love?"

Sir Pentious

"OF COURSE. YOU'RE BLEEDING AND WOUNDED AND OUT HERE BY YOURSSSSELF." He's looking so concerned... "I DON'T HAVE ANY BANDAGES ON HAND...."

Valera

"What?" Wait, right. Aliens worry a lot more about that kind of thing, huh? ..Or was that everyone not heavily traumatized and used to regrowing limbs? Hard to keep track, really. Whatever. He's concerned, which is the OPPOSITE of what she wanted!

Quick, say something comforting! "I'll be okay, darling! I'm used to... it...?" She squints. Wait. No. That sounds bad, actually. "It'll grow back in a few minutes! You'd never know I was hurt!" YEAH THAT'S THE ONE.

Sir Pentious

Frown! WEH!

"WHO CARESSSS WHETHER I KNOW OR NOT, YOU *ARE* HURT! AND I WANT TO HELP!"

Valera

She looks... A bit baffled. But once she's over the initial surprise, she takes one of his hands in hers and pats it.

"Oh. Um. Alright, do you want to.. Help me to the bathroom? I'm sure we've got medical supplies in there."

Sir Pentious

Listen, caring about other people is not Penny's strong suit, but he cares so so much about Valera.

"YESSS, GLADLY."

Valera

Being cared about is not something Valera is used to, she's not sure how to handle being the one getting fussed over. But if it makes Pentious happy... She'll try to fumble through it. Time to get up, then. He can't lift her, but taking the weight off the worst leg should make it easier to not open anything on her carpets.

Awkward cough.. "Thank you, love. I was just going to sit out here until everything healed over, but. This is better."

Sir Pentious

"YOU SHOWED ME THAT I DON'T HAVE TO BE ALONE ANYMORE... SO, PLEASE LET ME SHOW YOU THAT, TOO." Hand kiss....

Valera

He's lucky she's already standing or else she'd do the affection wheeze all over again. But no, she has to hide her face against him like a normal person and pray the blush doesn't reach the tips of her fins. Just. Just going to take his arm and let him lead her along, then.......

Sir Pentious

Off they go..... To the bathroom........ Womance....

Valera

He can put salve on her wounds and wrap up the more uncomfortable ones, and she will be very embarrassed and very grateful... And also whine a lot because ow, the salve Hilda makes is NOT soothing in the slightest, it burns!!! Sure heals things fast though, the smaller cuts vanish in moments!