#also faced with misogyny

[lienspien]

Lily the type of girl who would have her whole life planned out when she was 12 but break down at 16 when she doesn't know what to do with her life and nothing is going according to plan no matter what she does because she's tired of homework, public speeches, debating, doesn't know what she likes, doesn't know what she's actually good at, helps lead people to their right path but can't lead herself to her own, only approached to when needed to vent or for homework/assignments/tasks. Forced to do something she was good at when she was 11 but no longer have the passion for anymore at 15.

Still, she acts like she knows that she's doing, likes what she's doing, and has it all figured out. Doesn't want to settle and be a trophy wife but also doesn't want to work and be a corporate slave. Forced to collect herself after a breakdown quickly so people assume that she's capable of handling her emotions. Doesn't know her worth, thinks her opinions are stupid because she's always turned away for being muggle born and a woman. Forced to filter her emotions and thoughts, because being loud means she's too "intense" yet when Sirius does it, it's "charming"

Hearing people out because she doesn't want people to experience the same thing as her. Wanting to be heard, but afraid of being known.

[prolibytherium]

Just in general I think trying to look to pre-late modern period history for validation of LGBT+ identities is an absolutely useless venture. Every single underlying human experience defined through the lens and framework of LGBT identity has always existed, but it's impossible to pin down Exactly who and what a figure might have been if they existed in this contemporary context and decided to self identify via these labels.

It's also a wildly reductive lens that flattens the complexity and variety of how sex and gender has been constructed across time in different cultures, how sexual norms have varied, etc. This is not a constructive approach to learn about history and you're never going to be able to fit historical figures neatly into little identity categories.

[lesbianchemicalplant]

I get that “you can just not wear makeup, it's okay to not wear makeup” can sometimes be the exact thing that someone needs to hear, or to be reassured about. but some people are really condescending about when and how they pull that out and who they say it to

like, there is a social reality of misogyny that women are punished for not appearing a certain way, with all the more severity as a function of class, racism, transmisogyny, etc.

that punishment can be the difference between employed and unemployed. having food and not having food. being treated as less competent and less worthy as a person not only by men, but also by other women and people of any gender in general

and tbh, it's especially fucked how some transmisogyny-exempt people say this to trans women, particularly toward those of us with facial hair / stubble that stands out very visibly from our skin. like a trans woman wearing makeup is obviously just too dumb, shallow, misogynistic, and femininity-obsessed to know better, so they take it upon themselves to remind her that “you can be a woman without wearing makeup! :)” in the same voice they use to tell a toddler that the mushy peas are good

do you think trans women wearing makeup while going to job interviews or working customer service positions (or even, yes, trying to exist in public life in general) are all just stuck-up assimilationists with Bad Ideas about gender? do you think it's only trans women with pointedly transmisogynistic values about “passing” who would ever wear makeup or dress a certain way to try to be treated less horribly by the world around us?

especially if you're vividly aware of how you yourself are punished for not wearing makeup—how do you not extend that awareness to other women? including other women who would pretty fucking obviously be treated even worse for it than you are? (how seriously have you considered that some women might be treated worse for it than you are? treated worse by someone like you, even?)

“you can just not wear makeup” “you don't need makeup, there's nothing about your face that needs fixing” okay well hiring managers will absolutely discriminate against me for not wearing makeup to job interviews, but thanks for enlightening me I guess

[nekropsii]

RUFIOH PROPAGANDA: Literally everything he has ever done to and about Damara - cheating on her and lying to her for years, seemingly never standing up for her when Meenah was terrorizing her, still chasing her image as a sex object to this day (particularly Aradiabot, who he says acts “just like the real thing”), and calling her his “psycho ex” behind her back constantly while acting nice to her face.

KANKRI PROPAGANDA: Straight up doesn’t think Misogyny is real and denies its existence outright, calling it a meaningless pseudoscience not worth any concern, discussion, or consideration. Slutshames Porrim directly to her face.

[fur-bee]

i love mouthwashing for not just making a point about how rapists view and treat their victims but also the ways in which men who arent rapist contribute to rape culture. I’m not saying curly is as bad as jimmy however men like curly actively participate in misogyny and rape culture by refusing to condemn their rapist friends.

It isn’t something you see often in media but it is something you see time after time in real life; where a guy who is by all accounts respectful to women, but (at the very least subconsciously) believes his male friendships and “not rocking the boat” are more important than the safety of women

[mouseratz]

it's interesting how many transmascs on this site can observe the way that feminism has often been derailed by "mens rights activism", because feminism is seen as a threat to men's rights- women's rights are viewed as in opposition to men's rights & therefore incompatible (for the crime of merely admitting how misogyny has a place in our society)

and yet. feel no need to self reflect on the way transmisogyny is viewed, too, as in opposition to trans men. how trans women's rights are viewed as incompatible with trans men's rights, how transfemmes are pretty constantly attacked for expressing their experiences & struggles because merely saying they exist uniquely is seen as an attack on transmascs, is seen as denying the issues that transmascs have.....somehow, the "what about me?" response is all that matters.

that is why "transandrophobia" gets compared to men's rights activism. that is why it's so connected to transmisogyny (which you're apparently not supposed to admit that people within the trans community are capable of); it is a repeat of gendered issues, there is still a refusal to just try to understand what women are saying. a continued insistence of "my issues are more important than yours" (even though that was never really what was being said in the first place. all that was being asked was to listen, to try to understand....but when a woman says it, complains about something, that's what you feel is implied. for some reason. hm, is there a word for that?)

[princessefemmelesbian]

Transandrophobia truthers are so damn racist and white oh my fucking god y'all actually piss me the fuck off every time you tokenize Black and brown men for your stupid as fuck "mra but make it trans-inclusive" ideology created by a creepy guy with a corrective rape fetish(something I'll never let up on for as long as I live, btw). If I ever see another one of y'all say "Black and brown men face discrimination because they're seen as overly masculine and that's why masculinity in men is oppressed in this society" I will literally kill myself. Stop using Black and brown men as brownie points for your bullshit arguments about misandry being real when you don't have the slightest idea how racialized oppression works. White boys are so annoying and dumb istfg.

@punkeropercyjackson @punknicodiangelo @pinkpinkstarlet

[sprimpfriedrice]

White dungeon meshi fans sound like this to me:

It's extremely fascinating and frightening to me how hateful some of you people are towards shuro, a man who is clearly depicted as japanese, (a man who could look like me or literally any member of my family in real life) for being a normal, complex, and flawed human being.

Why do you single him out for getting frustrated with and mad at laios when chilchuck and marcille do the same literally all the time? What's the difference between them and shuro?

Why do you feel the unnecessary need to protect these white women from a japanese man?

Do you expect that this japanese man is inherently going to have some kind of ugly negative quality that has not been once hinted at canonically? Do you know what that's called? Because i do and it's fucking racism.

You people get scared the moment a character that is a person of color isnt a quiet little model minority or a sweet mammy archetype. You grasp at your pearls the moment they are revealed to have complex personalities and histories; when they feel negative, big emotions that are literally part of the human experience. Or god forbid, when they show romantic interest in a pure, helpless, little white woman.

And when a person of color stops behaving good and docile the way you want, when they decide that theyre not going to put up with a situation that makes them uncomfortable or miserable or RIGHTEOUSLY FURIOUS, they become the bad guy. As seen countless times in the medias demonizing depiction of the Black Lives Matter protests and even of black people who get punished for just living their lives. It happens so often i shouldnt have to reiterate it to you but it somehow keeps flying over your head.

And when that dirty, conniving, perverted, slant eyed, buck toothed, stumpy little japanese man understandably snaps at the white person you guys are projecting onto and all you see is this:

So dont be surprised when i say that id rather kill myself than entrust the safety of my oldest aunts and uncles or my youngest cousins with any of you who act like this. Im terrified of what could have happened if people like you worked at the facility that my great grandmother lived out her final years in. Would you have seen her as a wild animal that needed to be subdued too when she had one of her many dementia-induced violent episode?

I will not apologize for saying that i find it deeply disconcerting to see so many of you happily posting hateful vitriol or even about committing acts of violence against a man that looks like me, solely because he was experiencing his humanity

[sukibenders]

"I'm team feminist/feminism!" But will quickly drag a female character through the mud without sympathy for their circumstances just because they don't fit your ideals, will get mad when poc criticize a female character's actions that are very thinly coded in racism and say "support her crimes!" while ignoring how that often leads to the harm of poc characters, will shade woc characters or put them on higher pedestals than their yte counterparts while ignoring the harm they face while trying to meet your standards, will victim blame those who suffer (and are still suffering) from abuse when they act out in ways you deem "wrong" because of it, following up with the last point will mock and laugh at said abuse to uplift another female character (pitting women against women, even when the narrative does not ask for that), will dismiss any valuable argument displayed if the said female character is a little mean but then go and say "why can't female characters be mean? 🙄"

I could go on.

[stupot]

I feel like, regrettably, this website needs a crash course in recognizing a particular brand of post about female martyrdom and suffering that is really, at its core, based on OP's views on a holistic level, a post about hating """men""" in disguise. Female anger is righteous and does come a from a place of personal and historical suffering, and should be expressed. I truly do think that. But I guess Tumblr's userbase sucks because then you go on these blogs and it's post after post about how men are ontologically evil and sex work should be criminalized and women are these broken shattered creatures unilaterally scorned by MALES with no hope for justice. Just the absolute most childish reductive way of analyzing misogyny in our culture that always boils down to racism, prejudice against sex workers, and transphobia

[darilarostarg]

Love the implication from Condal that F&B falls under the ‘women being erased from history’ category, while actively writing Alicent out of all her contributions to the war, and giving them to men, in favour of bath and sex scenes. LOVE that so much.

[jacksprostate]

Things I won't forgive the fight club movie for regarding the character of Marla Singer, entry C:

The manic pixie dreamgirlification of her own struggle with life and death. The narrator gets to have a serious issue driving his alienation but Marla gets her cancer removed so her pithy statement about the tragedy of death being that she doesn't fall over dead randomly is just a bit Offbeat And Interesting And Edgy haha! She's a real tourist, really, nothing ever stated to be wrong about her. Sure she overdoses. Sure you can see she's got a shit life. But she doesn't get backstory. She doesn't get a life beyond fun little statements that, when her own reason for saying and thinking them is removed, mostly just reflect the narrator. In the book, it is very, very clear. Marla does what she does because she has cancer and is afraid of The Slow Death. The Wasting. The Struggle. By taking that away you even reduce her suicide attempt. It puts it all in this context of nothingness. Sure, you can assume a depth, but I don't think we should be uncritical about the fact that they chose to remove it. Marla Singer is more than an object that bothers the narrator out of the support groups and gets fucked by Tyler Durden. Marla Singer is a person in her own right in the book, and in the movie she's just... not.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

ppl forget that dream threw a hissy fit about a Mexican man stopping hanging out with him after he bought a trump flag as a “joke” spend over a week posting about how much he wanted to beat him up and liking art of them as real life people making out and then blamed his doxxing (which is obviously horrifying and wrong but that shit was going around since 2019 quackity didn’t even know he Existed when it started) on Quackity muting his ass bc he treated racism against him as a big joke, made comments about wanting to be violent towards him, and pushed romantic fanart after they’d stopped even being friends. like bro Quackity wasn’t reading your messages because he, quite rightly, assumed you were going to be an asshole to him bc you were talking about wanting to fight him in public and making up this whole feud bc you were pissy he didn’t quietly accept the YEARS of casual racism towards him from the dteam any longer like. it’s such blatant obvious racism dream was weaponising white tears bc his friends stopped hanging around his ass bc of his constant fucking casual bigotry. like his ass is not progressive people just apparently don’t recognise basic fucking white supremacy anymore. like. what the fuck.

[jackawful]

idk I still don't think tma/tme are The Best Possible Terms For The Phenomena but like. Tumblr is so good at making arguments that should be about The Phenomena about the terms used to describe it instead & like, all models are imperfect?

anyway I sincerely do not get how occasional, infrequent experiences of being mistaken for a trans woman would cause someone to try to claim that whole experience as their own instead of it giving them some fucking empathy for the people who face that constantly and cannot avoid it. which is why I stopped quibbling over the exact terminology when I saw how those Internet Fights were largely defending trans dudes' fragility while actively & disproportionately harming transfems. approaching this shit with empathy & trying to avoid harm to your sisters is like the bare fucking minimum here y'all.

[musical-chick-13]

Regarding the whole "Fandom Is An Escape, so why should I have to care this much about misogyny/racism/ableism/transphobia/etc." thing. Idk about the rest of you, but it gets kind of hard for me to "escape" when I keep seeing people say the same vile things about characters who share aspects of my identity that I hear all the time in real life.

[larsnicklas]

one thing that is funny about m.arner fans though is that they ARE convinced that he is the first player ever to suffer from misogyny in hockey culture when don c.herry and his ilk have been calling euro players pussies derogatorily for time immemorial