#alright... well i heard ' go crazy ' and the writer in me immediately went ' BET ' / j lol

[mad-hunts]

｡゜(｀Д´)゜｡ ( go crazy hehe )

miserable. absolutely miserable is the only way that barton could describe what he was feeling right now. and yet, that didn't even seem to begin to cover the kind of horror that was in his dream at the same time. or, well, perhaps calling it a nightmare would be more appropriate. what he was seeing, or picturing in his head more like, felt so realistic that it seemed as if he'd somehow been brought back to that moment in time at first; even though that would be logically impossible. the moment in question unearthed a part of barton that he'd tried so hard to tuck away during his daily life, but was always there, waiting for some sort of catalyst so it could properly break free from the confines of his mind. it was the part of him that felt broken.

from the moment he saw the light streaming out from beside him between the slats of the closet he had hidden in at the time and the sounds of angry, almost manic shouting coming from wesley, his father... barton knew where this was going. there would be crashes in the house after that, as if wesley had become so filled with red-hot rage, that he couldn't physically contain it. the blonde had never been the religious type, even as a child, but he remembered praying to himself while he sat in that dark and cramped closet that he wouldn't be caught by him. barton had just wanted to help his father by getting rid of that nasty stuff he used to drink as he used to consider it, or more specifically alochol, by hiding it all in some place he'd never find it.

but wesley didn't take it that way at all and now he was on the war-path to do something that would leave a permanent scar on barton. he could practically smell the foul stench coming off of him had made now whenever it happened once again, brought about by someone who was supposed to love him, through... the blonde suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder shake him awake and he jolted up in his seat then as if he was scared out of his wits. which, considering what he had just waken up from, was kind of understandable. one of the first things he was able to comprehend upon waking was that his whole body was shaking and he couldn't get it to stop. his pulse was thundering in his ears, too, adrenaline coursing through his veins with such a fervor that it was almost like it was always meant to do that. he was cold, also, but felt the distinct feeling of sweat clinging to his body.

was he even really here right now? barton looked around like he was expecting something to pop out at him, paranoia seemingly getting the best of him. there was something making it hard for him to see. it was tears, he soon realized, them falling down his cheeks freely while he still was feeling slightly suspicious that maybe that was the reality and what he'd just woken up to was fake. barton said nothing to the stranger that had woken him up at first, for he literally couldn't form the proper words to explain what exactly he was going through, hands covering the entire upper half of his face. the shaking of his body seemed like something that would not be going away anytime soon. so, barton just let it happen.

after a few moments spent in silence, he finally was able to face the stranger next to him, voice coming out slightly nasally and like he was out of breath, ❝ um... i, i'm sorry. this doesn't usually happen to me while i'm — at the office. ahh, how'd you get in here? there is supposed to be a receptionist in the front that you check in with, ❞ barton sniffled as he got up slightly unsteadily from his chair and let out a dry laugh at just how awkward this must've been for mya. she'd probably just come here to get checked out, then stumbled across this, ❝ just give me a minute, and i'll be right with you for whatever you need. whenever you came in here today, this is probably not at all what you were expecting on seeing, huh? ❞

another dry laugh at his own expense. god's, why did this have to happen to him?