#all I wanted for O and Bell was a happy ending
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okmcintyre · 9 months ago
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send me a character and i’ll list:
favorite thing about them: her rebellious, fighting spirit is absolutely what drew me in (I feel like that was the case with so many of us!) I loved that she was very clearly the delinquents' WILD CHILD!
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least favorite thing about them: I hated how she treated her brother sometimes. Obviously after Lincoln's death is the most glaring example, but it's not the only one. It's a shame we weren't given more opportunities to see the two addressing & healing from that toxic pattern they had going (because the Blake Siblings really were super important to each other!)
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favorite line: THE LETTER!! ⬇️
"Bell, I hope against hope that this letter reaches you. I need you to know that you were right. There was a darkness in me, but Diyoza helped me past that darkness. That’s behind me now. I need you to know that I finally understand all you did to protect me, watch over me, love me. I wish I could see your face and hug you and tell you that I get it now. I wish I could thank you. By the time you get this — if you get this — I’ll probably be an old lady or dead. I want you to know I was happy. I have Hope. Diyoza’s a pain in the ass, but I love her, like I love you. Please don’t worry about me. You deserve to be happy, Big Brother. Always yours, Octavia"
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brOTP: I love she & Clarke, and she & Echo? And the dynamic between O and Indra is really special too (*obviously Bellamy is my fave brotp for her, but since they're related it seemed too obvious to choose him 😅)
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OTP: Lincoln all day! And Gabriel I thought had outstanding chemistry/story potential for her. AND I wouldn't have been mad at Octavia/Niylah either 🔥🔥🔥
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nOTP: Ugh, Illian. He drove me nuts!
I also have mixed feelings about Levitt, I LOVE him... but I feel like her story was short-changed to allow for that particular (wonderful!) bit of fan service lol
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random headcanon: she and Bellamy had time to heal and grow living on Sanctum, and eventually became closer than ever again. They have coffee together every morning, now ☕☺️
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unpopular opinion: SHE WAS SO MUCH FUN AS BLODRENIA (despite being completely bonkers & outta control)
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song i associate with them: POKERFACE BY LADY GAGA and I'm not sure why?
favorite picture of them: here's a gif!
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hedgehog-moss · 7 months ago
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The blueberry tart moral quandary has been very fun to ponder! Thank you for sharing it with us. I think the real question, however, is what each of your animals would think about ordering two slices of tart under the circumstances
You're right, that IS the true question here. Let's situate this in a universe where blueberry tart is safe & delicious to eat for all animal species.
CHICKENS. The chickens would definitely want that second helping of tart because chickens live in a solipsistic moral universe and would hesitate to share tart even if it was their dying sister's last wish. However if you place two slices of tart on the ground for 2 chickens, they will immediately and violently start fighting each other over the same slice, thus giving you the opportunity to discreetly retrieve the first slice for yourself. Moreover, if a chicken manages to break off half of the slice and starts running like hell to go eat it elsewhere in peace, the other chicken will take off after her instead of eating the other half happily by herself. If they then break this half in two while fighting over it, they will resume fighting over that half of the half, allowing you to retrieve 3/4 of the second slice. And so on. This is Zeno's paradox applied to chickens and tart: the hens will spend the rest of eternity fighting over diminishing crumbs while you get almost all of the second slice back (albeit broken in increasingly minuscule halves.)
CATS. Not only would the cats want that second slice regardless of who else wants it, they would also sit & start grooming themselves on the rest of the pie with great serenity, rendering it inedible for anyone else. However, my original post established that the pies were under large bell jars. Two of my three cats are (to their everlasting torment) stymied by this sadistic human invention. If the bell jar is heavy enough that you can't push it off the table (a popular strategy), then Mascarille and Merricat will just circle it a few times, ram their faces into the glass, do a full body swipe against it in case this might open a secret door, and then walk away in frustration. Morille on the other hand is a cat possessed of extreme patience, diabolical intelligence and acute interest in forbidden food. She will get the tart no matter how long she has to lie in wait.
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DOG. Pandolf would not want a second slice or even a first one, if he is made to understand that this might make other people sad. The thing with Pandolf is, he can smell disappointment. His great big nose picks up on every particle of human disappointment in the air and they go straight to his heart. He is also too polite to even defend his bone from thieving chickens. There's no way he would claim any tart at all unless someone gave it to him and made it clear they would be happy for him to eat it. However Pandolf is very cute when he sits there with a lolling tongue, happy for others to have a good time, and there is also no way one or several persons wouldn't give him their slice of tart. He would definitely end up with tart.
LLAMAS. Pampelune is the matriarch and since her duties involve dying to protect her herd in case of predator attacks, she considers it her prerogative to eat first and as much as she damn pleases in compensation. She would get two slices. I believe Poldine would choose to have only one slice and kiss everyone in the restaurant on the cheek for good measure, and I also believe she would actually get zero tart. As shown in the salt video, Poldine understands her place in the pasture hierarchy (the one who eats last) and has to resort to subterfuge to get even 1 lick of salt while others are gorging themselves. She will be very dependent on other people's temperance and decency to get any tart (so, Pandolf is her best bet.) Meanwhile Pampérigouste is trying to figure out how to escape the restaurant undetected to go on an adventure while the sheeple are talking about tart. She will get one or two or three slices but only if they can facilitate her various stratagems (for example, to bribe a guard at the door.)
The FISH—do not have the cognitive abilities to worry about morals but more importantly, do not experience soul-deep desires in the way the birds and mammals in this list do. My fish live in a smooth and quiet world where the gods make food rain from the sky every day. In this luminescent existence of untroubled abundance their capacity for longing has atrophied. They do not understand what wanting tart means, let alone the complex philosophical agonies humans can put themselves through when faced with culinary conundrums.
DONKEY. Pirlouit's first instinct would be to claim all the tart he can eat and then some. However donkeys and fish sit at opposite ends of the philosophical spectrum; Pirlouit strikes me as an animal who would be interested in exploring the ethical ramifications of the issue, as an intellectual exercise. 70% of his life consists in quiet deep ponderings. I think Pirlouit could get distracted ruminating the blueberry tart quandary in light of the rich philosophical heritage of donkey civilisation, and arrive too late to get any tart by the time he determined whether one or two slices is the right answer. Kind of like that time he got distracted by his need for revenge and was late for breakfast and the llamas had already claimed the hay.
IN CONCLUSION.
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fuckyeahgoodomens · 1 year ago
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Link 1, Link 2 :)
Digital Good Omens 2 Sountrack is coming out in 4 days! 🥳 CD version in October! :) ❤ Coming soon on vinyl…
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Out to Stream/Download from 25th August. Out on CD 13th October. Coming soon on vinyl…
David Arnold’s ‘end of the world’ complex and multi-genre soundtrack.
From the Award-winning composer of Sherlock and Casino Royale comes a follow up to the hugely successful, Emmy nominated Good Omens soundtrack.
Good Omens series 2 premiered on Prime Video on 28th July. The series follows the odd couple, angel Aziraphale (Michael Sheen) and demon Crowley (David Tennant) in their quest to sabotage the end of the World. The six-episode sequel to the popular adaptation of the novel by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, concerns the Archangel Gabriel (Jon Hamm) arriving without his memories to Aziraphale’s bookshop. Aziraphale and Crowley attempt to find out what happened to Gabriel, whilst hiding him from Heaven and Hell, both eager to find him.
The Soundtrack
David Arnold’s soundtrack to Good Omens was first released in 2019 to favourable reviews, with BBC Music Magazine calling it “a rollicking trip to hell and back”. Blueprint Magazine described it as “a great listen” and Sci Fi Bulletin commented on “plenty of memorable themes” to conclude that “This is another work of art from Arnold”. At times nostalgic and eerie but always varied, beautiful and full of excitement, the Good Omens 2 soundtrack showcases Arnold’s every skill from his composer arsenal. Featured here are orchestral arrangements with sprinkling of Sugar Plum Fairy pizzicato and percussion, jaunty strings and mighty choral sweeps from Crouch End Festival Chorus. Added to the mix are rock guitar riffs, and psychedelic 70s sounds and all together they create a haunting otherworldly feel, complementing the fantasy and the quirky humour of the show. The spirited Waltz of the opening theme is also present in the second series and it wonderfully sets the scene for fantastical mayhem. In series 2, this robust, evocative, and funny music entity, becomes yet again another character in the story. Award-winning composer David Arnold is well known for his blockbuster scores, including Stargate, The Chronicles of Narnia: the Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Hot Fuzz, Paul, Independence Day, 2 Fast 2 Furious and Casino Royale as well as for his TV work such as Sherlock and Dracula. Also available: The original soundtrack to the first series of Good Omens >
Tracklist
– Disc 1 – Chapter 1: The Arrival 1. Before the Beginning 2. Good Omens 2 Opening Title 3. Into Soho 4. Something Terrible 5. To The Bookshop 6. Maggie and Nina 7. He’s Smoking 8. Tiny Miracle 9. Heavenly Alarm Bells Chapter 2: The Clue 10. Avaunt! 11. The Song is the Clue 12. It’s What God Wants 13. A Mighty Wind 14. Whales 15. Gabriel Returns 16. His New Children 17. Am I Awful Now? 18. Fallen Angel Chapter 3: I Know Where I’m Going 19. Police Arrive 20. Scotland 21. We’re Going to Hell 22. People Get a Choice 23. My Car is Not Yellow 24. Beelzebub in Hell 25. The Book 26. The Fly 27. Mr. Dalrymple 28. We Need to Cut 29. I’m Going to Save Her 30. Crowley Goes Large 31. Not Kind 32. Beelzebub Isn’t Happy – Disc 2 – Chapter 4: The Hitchhiker 33. Hell-O 34. Nazi Zombies 35. March of the Nazi Zombies 36. Crowley Pep Talk 37. The Magic Shop 38. Catch The Bullet 39. Zombies in the Dressing Room Chapter 5: The Ball 40. I’ll Let You Have It 41. We’re Storming a Book Shop 42. Monsieur Azirophale 43. The Candelabra 44. Here Comes Hell 45. Gabriel Gives Himself Up 46. Shax 47. The Circle Chapter 6: Every Day 48. Bin Through the Window 49. Gabriel Leaving Heaven 50. The Halo 51. Gabriel Revealed 52. Gabriel’s Love Story 53. Leaving The Bookshop 54. Gabriel and Beelzebub 55. Crowley and Muriel 56. I Forgive You 57. Don’t Bother 58. The Biggest Decision 59. The End?
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lixopoo · 4 months ago
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Hello! I really like your posts, in particular the Belle one. Can you please do a zzz Nicole x S/O who left the Cunning Hares? Sorry if it’s long but I got in the zone. Like the S/O was a cofounder but left due to disagreements to how the agency is ran. Cue to Anby and Billy after a while of the agency being mismanaged tries to get you back in. You tried to doing one but it didn’t work out as you need her all or nothing approach, but on the other hand she needs you to reel her in. They manage to do it by tricking you two by making y’all think there was going to be a hangout but by the meet up time there’s only you two. There’s arguing but it’s let out accidentally that you like each other. After that it’s more of there being a talk to let things out what you two are and work it out as the agency you both created is both of yours baby in the end of the day.
✶ Nicole Demara dating headcanons w backstory!
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⇢ Nicole Demara x gn!reader ;
⇢ type - headcanons ;
⇢ tags - fluff , little bit angst(?) , kisses , hugs ;
⇢ thanks for request! i love Nicole so much, so im glad you ordered her but it seems to me that it turned out worse than i imagined, sorry!
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⋆ You and Nicole were close even before the creation of the agency, from the orphanage, since you were also an orphan. You have always envied her cunning character and how easily any task is given to her, deep down I want to become the same.
⋆ Time passed, and one family was able to adopt you, thereby taking you from the orphanage, but it all happened so suddenly that you were unable to say goodbye to Nicole, thereby leaving her completely alone. You were very sad, as was she, but a year later, walking down the street, you saw her again.
⋆ She was incredibly happy to see you, but you are stronger, so you just almost knocked her off her feet with your hugs.
⋆ Hearing the story of how she was adopted by a rich family and then made a deal with them to hang around the streets of New Eridu, you were surprised, but immediately laughed, because Nicole, who was in the orphanage has not changed a bit.
⋆ After some time, her love for money and cunning only grew, so you decided to create your own agency to help the residents of New Eridu and earn a good income.
⋆ After joining the agency of Anby and Billy the Kid, your days only became more fun and interesting, but the fact that all the money Nicole earned was turning into a minus was very alarming to you. You turned a blind eye to this, because she was the initiator of the creation of the Sly Hares, which means her money... probably?
⋆ You tried to talk to her about this topic many times, but she only avoided the conversation, calling you cute nicknames to appease you.
⋆ After another conversation with Phaeton about the order, you learned about the debts that Nicole did not mention. This was the last straw, because spending the money that the four of you earned so easily is unacceptable.
⋆ You decided to have one last conversation with Nicole on this topic when you were alone, but the result was the same, which made you even angrier.
«I'm leaving Cunning Hares»
⋆ Trembling, Nicole turned around to look at you, but saw no one. You disappeared in the same way as you did at the shelter, leaving her alone again.
⋆ For the next week, Nicole was irritated and upset at the same time, not wanting to see you at all, even though it was obvious how much she missed you.
⋆ Anby and Billy were surprised by your unexpected departure, which made them very upset. They tried to find you and just talk, but, unfortunately, you were nowhere to be found.
⋆ You decided to do easy tasks on your own to earn money, so you spent all your time either in Hollow or in places they didn’t look into.
⋆ But you couldn’t hide for long, because while playing slot machines, you accidentally met Billy, who was hanging out there, and Anby was nearby.
⋆ They were incredibly happy to see you, almost pouncing and knocking you down. Billy bombarded you with questions, which you reluctantly answered, but told you the reason for leaving.
⋆ You hung out together for a little longer before breaking up and asking her not to tell Nicole that they saw you. After which Anby immediately had a plan in her head, which she immediately told Billy.
⋆ Two days later you met them again near the slot machines, but this time you had a little more fun, after which they suddenly invited you to a “farewell party” in your honor, mentioning that, of course, Nicole wouldn’t be there and the three of you would just have fun.
⋆ Although it seemed strange to you, you were not going to refuse them. You accepted their offer and waited for the next day.
⋆ Arriving at the meeting place - a newly opened cafe, you were surprised that it was so empty inside, but you went inside anyway and sat down at the nearest table, waiting for Billy and Anby, but imagine your surprise when you saw Nicole on the threshold.
⋆ You immediately jumped up from your chair and she noticed you. You just stared at each other for a minute before she looked away with a frown.
⋆ She wanted to run away, but something stopped her, just like you, because deep down you weren’t the least bit angry at each other, only at yourself.
⋆ Realizing that Enby and Billy had simply set you up, you both got a little angry, but you knew that they meant what was best, so you just sat down at the table in silence, starting a game of silence.
⋆ You were the first to start a conversation, again remembering how naively she was throwing away the agency’s money, without thinking about others. Of course, this angered her even more, because she didn’t want to talk about it. Slamming her hands on the table and standing up, she leaned over a little to be closer to you.
«I did this for the agency, don’t you understand?! You know how dear it is to me... As dear as you!»
⋆ You knew this very well, but you still had a strange feeling. You continued your little argument until she openly admitted her feelings, immediately realizing what she said and blushing.
⋆ You stared at her with your mouth open for a few seconds before you too blushed and looked away.
«I...»
«No! Just... I want you to come back!»
⋆ Her eyes became wet, and Nicole herself just wanted to run away. You smiled faintly, seeing the real Nicole was rare. Slowly standing up and walking over to her, you hugged her from the side, beginning to calm her down.
«I love you too»
⋆ A couple of minutes later, you were already sitting next to her, holding her hand, and talking casually. You decided to return back to the agency, but on the condition that you would manage the money, since you had more financial literacy.
⋆ She is possessive, so her hugs are tight and warm enough to make you feel safe. She will always make some kind of contact with you in public, whether it's holding your hand or kissing you.
⋆ She kisses you often, so your lips are always the same color as her lipstick. Her kisses are as possessive as her hugs, but light and full of love.
⋆ Despite even the small quarrels between you, she loves you and does not want you to leave her alone again.
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actually i think this is my worst work because it was difficult for me...
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illdowhatiwantthanks · 6 months ago
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Left Unsaid
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Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, angst (happy ending!), sex, fingering, explicit language, surgery times (duh), (let me know if I missed anything!) Word count: 1.8k
Summary: You used to be Dr. Shepherd's favorite resident, but something had happened in the last month that drove you further apart than ever. Will it get resolved (hint: yes, it does)?
“You, out!”
You stood, flabbergasted, in full scrub, suctioning blood out of someone’s brain-deep head wound. The OR had gone deathly silent, and if they could’ve seen your face under your surgical mask, they would have seen you blushing bright red.
All you’d done was ask a question. All you’d wanted to know was why Dr. Shepherd had gone after the brain bleed at the angle she did, because it wasn’t the angle you’d expected. You were a surgical resident. Asking questions is what you were supposed to do.
“Dr. Shepherd, I–”
“Uh-uh. You? Out of here. You’re distracting me, Y/L/N. And if you can’t focus on saving this man’s life, you don’t need to be in here.”
Frustrated and more than a little embarrassed, you handed off the suction tube to another resident and quickly burst through the doors and into the scrub room, washing your hands furiously. You felt like crying. You didn’t know what was going on these days.
During your intern year, you’d gotten really close with Dr. Shepherd. She’d sort of take you under her wing, said you had the right mind and hands for neuro. You worked well together, almost read each other’s thoughts sometimes, it seemed. But the last month or so, she’d all but banished you from her service.
You knew part of it had to be Webber’s new initiative for “well-rounded surgeons,” a new protocol where residents were cycled between attendings at random, with no favoritism or preference allowed. But even when you were assigned to neuro, Dr. Shepherd always put you on the other neurosurgeon’s service. She hardly talked to you at all.
You wondered if you’d done something wrong, something to completely ruin the mentorship–no, the friendship–you’d felt like you were forming with Dr. Shepherd. Not only did you miss her company, miss working with her, but you missed neuro.
You spent the rest of your day on neuro doing glorified scut alongside the interns. Humiliating. And when you finally went home, you wanted nothing more than to collapse on the couch and order Chinese food. But a text from your cohort group chat reminded you that tonight was the annual Surgeons for Surgeons benefit gala. And unless you wanted to be fired, you’d have to show up, bells on, ready to mix and mingle and convince Seattle’s rich and famous to donate to the program that connected Seattle-Grace with its partner hospital in Nairobi.
You stared at yourself in the mirror before leaving. Thanks to a very artful layer of makeup, you looked a little less exhausted than you really were. And you had to admit, you looked good in a suit.
By the time you and your friends arrived at the gala, things were in full swing. Wine, music, twinkling lights, the whole shebang. You were determined to have fun with your friends, despite whatever weird stuff was going on with Dr. Shepherd. You’d had a few glasses of wine, had danced with a few other residents, and had generally avoided Dr. Shepherd, even though once or twice you’d caught her watching you. Let her feel bad, you thought. She was out of line.
But when you were on your way back from the bathroom, a hand shot out of a hallway and gently grabbed your arm.
“Jesus, Dr. Shepherd,” you complained, straightening your suit as she crossed her arms and looked at you, leaning against the hallway wall.
“Sorry,” she muttered. “You just…” She threw up her hands. “You’ve been avoiding me all night. I didn’t know how else to talk to you.”
You raised your eyebrows. “I’ve been avoiding you!?” You scoffed. “Dr. Shepherd, you haven’t talked to me in over a month. I went from being the de facto neuro resident to being bottom of the barrel in your OR. So forgive me if I’m not jumping at the opportunity to chat with you.”
Dr. Shepherd looked at the ground. “I know. I’m sorry.”
You sighed. “Look, I don’t care if we’re friends, okay? I– I would have liked it. I like you. But my career comes first. And whatever’s going on with us got in the way of that today. So whatever I did to upset you, I’m sorry. Okay? But I love neuro. And I’m good at it. You don’t have to talk to me ever, outside of work, but you cannot keep me from surgery.”
You started to walk away, but she stopped you.
“Y/N!” she called, grabbing your hand and holding it for just a moment too long. You were taken aback by her use of your first name. She always called you Dr. Y/L/N. “I don’t want that.”
“Okay…” You shrugged. “So put me back on your service.”
“No, I mean…” She exhaled sharply and stared at the ceiling. “I don’t want to be friends with you.”
You’d be lying if you said it didn’t sting. You liked Dr. Shepherd. You really liked her. You thought she’d liked you. You thought that in another life… But it didn’t matter now.
“Message received,” you said, avoiding her eyes.
“God, that’s not what I meant. I’m fucking this up.” She looked at you almost like she was in pain. As if there were words she just couldn’t get out. “What the hell,” she finally mumbled, then grabbed the sides of your face and kissed you.
To say you were surprised would be an understatement. But her lips felt so good against yours, her hands warm and soft against your skin. This was what Dr. Shepherd had wanted with you, why she’d been avoiding you. And, if you were honest with yourself, it was what you’d wanted to, you’d just been too scared to let yourself admit it.
You wrapped your arms around her waist, pressing her into the wall to deepen the kiss. She whined into your mouth, her tongue fighting for entrance, and you knew–by the arousal shooting down through your very core, the wetness pooling in your underwear–that this would not end here tonight. Amelia’s arms snaked underneath your blazer, searching for skin.
“Why do you have so many clothes on?” Amelia muttered breathlessly, painstakingly unbuttoning the collar of your dress shirt, then continuing on to the lower ones.
“Whoa!” You grabbed her wrists, pushing them away. “We’re in a public hallway, Dr. Shepherd.”
She huffed, pulling you by the arm into the closest room, which turned out to be some poor soul’s vacated office at this event venue. She slammed the door, taking her own turn to push you against a surface. It took your breath away.
“Don’t call me Dr. Shepherd when we’re about to have sex,” she said, trailing kisses down your neck.
“Fine, Amelia,” you retorted, and she smiled into a kiss. She liked a little sass in a woman.
With one hand, you rolled her nipple between your fingers. With the other, you moved slowly down her body, gently pulling up her dress to slip a hand into her underwear.
She gasped as you brushed lightly over her clit. “Fuck,” she breathed, throwing her head back. You smiled, happy to have a little power. Amelia might have all the power in the OR, but you had all the power here. You could tell by the way her hips rolled toward you, by the way she leaned heavily on the desk at her back–she wanted you bad.
She breathed heavily, squeezing your arms as she pushed her hips into you, desperate for the friction, the pressure. You grinned wickedly and removed your hand, licking her arousal off your fingers.
“Y/N!” she protested, glaring at you.
“Hmm.” You pretended to be thinking deeply, circling the rest of her vulva so that you were close, so close, to where she needed you, but not quite there. “You know what? I bet this feels a lot like being knee deep in a surgery and then being pulled for no reason at all.”
“I said I was sorry! Please, Y/N.” You had her squirming and writhing and you were getting drunk off her desperation.
You pushed two of your fingers into her warmth, already so wet, so ready for you, and she moaned. “I mean, I guess, if you insist.” You smirked at her, loving to see her lose control. She was always so in control at work. It was honestly something you admired about her. But right now? All you wanted was to see her coming apart.
There was a part of you that wanted to tell all the residents, to tell everyone that you were fucking Dr. Amelia Shepherd. But there was another part of you–deeper, softer, more you–that wanted to keep her all to yourself. Because some part of you knew that it wasn’t just sex, no matter how much easier it’d be if it was.
Amelia’s breathing grew ragged, her walls pulsing around you and you knew she was close. You circled her clit with your thumb, and she thrust her hips up into your touch, chest heaving, legs shaking. And when she finally, finally hit her peak, you scooped your arm around her back to hold her up, keeping your rhythm steady until she came down, resting her head on your shoulder, a thin sheen of sweat on her face.
“Fuck!” she breathed, lifting her head to grin at you and tuck your hair behind your hair. “Your hands.”
“That’s why I’m such a good surgeon.” You winked at her.
“That’s why you’re good at a number of things, apparently.” Amelia pulled her underwear up, straightening her dress.
“Well,” she shrugged. “Should we go back in?”
You scoffed. “I’m certainly not.”
“Why?!”
“Are you kidding me!? There’s a fucking lake in my underwear right now. I gotta go home.”
Amelia smirked, pulling you down by your collar for another kiss. You couldn’t take much more of this. You needed her. Or a vibrator. Or a dildo. Or something.
“You want help?” she asked, playing with the hair at the nape of your neck.
You blushed. The tables had turned all of a sudden, and she was the one with the power now. “Yeah,” you said quietly. “Yeah, that’d be… that’d be good.”
She laced her hand in yours, squeezing it. “Take me home, Dr. Y/L/N.”
“What if someone sees us!?” you hissed, looking both ways out the office door.
“We’ll slip out the back.”
“Sneaky.” You nodded. “I like this side of you.”
Glancing furtively around, she leaned forward and sunk her teeth into your neck, taking you by surprise. You gasped.
She pressed her lips against your ear. “I’ve got a lot of sides you haven’t seen yet.”
God, you couldn’t wait to see them.
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junkdrawerfics · 1 year ago
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Broken Pieces Put Back Together
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Jasper Whitlock X Reader
Summary: You get turned by Maria a short time after Jasper. Life in the coven is not what you expect though, as Maria quickly realizes you have a useful ability and you end up outliving the other newborns. At least you have Jasper, though. Until you don't.
Word Count: 3361
Warning: Depression, a short bit of suicidal thoughts, canonical violence. It gets rough in the middle y'all.
Lots of hurt but it has a happy ending, I promise.
---
You and Jasper were close to fast friends when you were forced to join Maria’s army. At first, you were terrified of the blond and his scar-ridden skin. Word reached you quickly of all he’d done, the countless lives he’d taken. How could you not be scared?
But then one night you found him on his own, standing outside the abandoned barn you called home, looking up at the stars with such a broken expression. That night, something drew you to his side. The urge to comfort, the need to ease his pain, was the first feeling to overcome the overwhelming sense of bloodlust constantly burning in your throat.
Not a single word was spoken that night. You didn’t know what to say, not to this man who had lived through so much more than you, and he didn’t offer anything in return. You both just stood there, still as statues, looking up at the stars.
That night you learned that Jasper Whitlock is not all that he appears to be.
It’s also the night Maria learned of your ability, and decided you might be of more value than she originally thought. You hadn’t even realized you were doing anything. In that moment, all you wanted was to keep him safe, hide him for just a little bit so he could breathe. And apparently you had done just that. You both disappeared, from everyone’s perception at least.
And so you lived. Outlived.
Your new reality was much crueler than you thought it could be. You realized that when your friend, a young girl changed the day after you, was deemed no longer useful.
That night, Jasper was the one who came to you.
“(Y/n).”
You don’t look away from the sky, the bleeding colors of the sunset dull in comparison to the flashing colors of fire behind your eyes. You can smell the smoke clinging to his clothes as he gets closer. It burns your nose, makes your chest ache as a fresh wave of pain sweeps through you.
“It was you, wasn’t it?” You ask quietly, voice like a broken set of bells.
Jasper sets his jaw, looking down at his hands. He nods slowly, an unfamiliar lump forming in his throat. He’s never felt guilty for following orders, he always thought it was for the best, that Maria knew better than the rest of them.
But then you look at him, your eyes swimming with tragedy, and it makes something inside of him ache. There’s no anger, no hatred, like he expected, just an ocean of grief.
 It clogs your throat, burns behind your eyes, leaves you shaking. You rest on the edge of tears, suffocating in that horrible, sinking feeling, but always unable to cry. And you hate it. You hate it. You hate it. It’s like walking a tightrope, always off balance, yet never falling.
But you shatter when a hand rests gently on your shoulder.
A dry, ugly sob breaks past your lips as you turn into Jasper’s body. He curls his arms around you wordlessly, wishing he could hold all your pieces together. And even though his hands are the ones that did it, even though you know he’ll have to do it again and again and again, you can’t help but soak up every ounce of comfort from his rare embrace.
Slowly the sadness lifts, until it's bearable, not crushing you but not completely gone. His ability. Usually you’d scold him, tell him your emotions are yours for a reason, but right now all you can do is hold onto him tighter.
He’s all you have left, now.
Something changed after that night. You and Jasper got even closer. He protected you and was your rock when Maria turned your ability into a weapon. And on nights when she would go hunting alone, the two of you would perch on the roof of the barn and just look at the stars, talking about anything and everything. 
You loved hearing stories of his human life. He would tell you about his time in the army, about the pressure he faced to join when he got old enough. His family didn’t have much, especially after the war started. You could tell he loved them, just by the soft smile he would get any time he talked about them.
You would take turns sharing stories. You told him about your siblings and their mischievous games. You were the oldest, so it often rested on you to watch over them, which usually ended with you covering up their shenanigans. You loved it though, taking care of them, teaching them.
That urge was still somewhere deep inside you, a motherly instinct you can’t quite shake. It made it all the more difficult to distance yourself from the fresh newborns in the coven. Before, you would take them in, calm them down, make sure they had something to drink to ease the pain of their thirst.
You couldn’t experience that again, though. That loss. So you kept your distance, spending most of your time with Jasper anyways. The man’s threatening aura kept most of them away. 
Except one. 
A newborn, a little too confident, a little too high on his new strength, decided he just couldn’t leave you alone. For the most part, you ignored him. In your human life, you dealt with more than enough  unwanted attention, so you thought you were used to it. He was as stubborn as he was arrogant though.
Until Jasper nearly killed him for making a move on you (a little too aggressively).
Luckily Maria wasn’t there for that.
“Are you alright?” Jasper ushers you outside, red eyes frantically scanning over you, as if you could be battered and bruised. 
“I’m fine, Jas,” you breathe, brushing the dust from your pants, “I’m more worried about that guy you just ripped the arm off of.”
“I should’ve killed him for touchin’ you.”
You glance at him, amusement quickly replacing the mild panic that filled you the moment that man laid his hands on you, “You know you wouldn’t. Maria would get angry if you did that.”
Jasper’s lips draw into a thin line. It shouldn’t matter. You’re the only one who treats him like he’s still human, his only friend. He wants to say that he will always protect you, even if he has to fight Maria herself. But the words don’t come. Deep down, a part of him knows they aren’t true, and that leaves behind a bitter taste in his mouth.
“Don’t look like that.” He blinks when you touch his cheek, your fingers soft and light, unlike Maria’s. You smile at him, just as gently, voice resigned, “I know how you think, Jasper Hale. You’re a loyal man, and that’s okay. You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”
As you say it, a sadness wraps around you, one that Jasper doesn’t understand. It doesn’t match your smile, or the soft creasing of your eyes as you look up at him. Why does it make you so sad?
You don’t let the feeling linger though, reigning it in the moment you notice the slight furrow of his brow he sometimes gets when he is trying to focus on your emotions. You don’t need him figuring out why. Why his loyalty to Maria makes your chest ache so painfully.
Falling in love with Jasper Hale was as easy as breathing, which says something considering you don’t even need to. Behind the tough, military face of his, was a man who was charismatic and gentle, who liked to laugh and remembered the name of every horse he’d ever ridden. 
He was loyal to a fault.
That’s why he could not see Maria’s true nature for the longest time. It became clear to you rather quickly once you got closer with Jasper. Close enough that she took notice. Close enough that she decided to do something about it.
It started with small things.
Whenever you would go to talk to Jasper, she would call him over for something unimportant.
She started sending you on little tasks, just to keep you out of the barn.
Even on the days she would go hunting, the days you looked forward to most because you and Jasper could be completely alone, she started taking Jasper with her.
And each time, she would give you one of those vicious smiles. Like she won. It did not take long to realize it was all on purpose. In her own way, she was telling you loud and clear that she wanted you nowhere near Jasper and anytime you tried, she’d be there to show you just how little you mattered.
What hurt most, though, was how Jasper always listened to her. Every time, he would follow after her like a good soldier, casting you a guilty look over his shoulder. You didn’t blame him though. You couldn’t. Not when you knew the alternative.
So you got used to being alone for the first time in your life. The sadness, the one that Jasper kept at bay all that time, slowly crept back in, filling every nook and cranny of your being. Day after day, it got harder to stay, to listen to Maria’s direction. Even when you did listen, she treated you like a pest, contempt burning in her eyes. 
You couldn’t bring yourself to leave though. The thought alone made your heart ache, because that would mean leaving Jasper. No amount of distance could dampen those feelings that came so quickly. They were branded in your heart, a part of you now and probably forever. A simple look from him and you would resign yourself all over again to stay. 
Even if it got you killed.
Some days were too hard though, watching him follow on Maria’s heel, doing all she asked. It had been months since you talked, actually talked. Months since you heard him laugh or felt the comfort of his touch, no matter how small it was. And it hurt.
The pain made it hard to drink. You’d go weeks without blood, finding the burn of the hunger was better than the empty feeling in your chest. It made you weak, your skin turning almost translucent, the circles under your eyes growing darker and darker.
Jasper hated it. He had to watch as you fell into depression, your emotions like a dark cloud around you, so strong even the newborns walked on eggshells around you. He hated it, yet he could never do anything about it.
He wasn’t as oblivious as you thought him to be. He was aware of Maria’s resentment towards you. Jasper knew that if he showed his concern, even an inkling of it, she would lash out at you. At least by her side, he could temper her emotions and protect you.
His efforts could only go so far, though.
As you grew weaker, your ability weakened as well. And Maria noticed.
You wanted her to notice. 
Leaving wasn’t an option, but the pain of staying was becoming too much for you to bear. Death seemed like the only way out of this eternally lonely existence. You just hoped Jasper wouldn’t have to be the one to do it.
Maria never liked the easy way, though. Loyalty must be proven.
You felt it as soon as you stepped foot outside the barn one night. The air was warm and dark clouds covered the sky, blocking out any light. Something sank in your gut and you just knew.
If you were going to die, you were at least going to die somewhere you could be surrounded by good memories. So you trekked to the hill where you first stood with Jasper, the one where you spent many nights watching the stars, and that’s exactly where he found you.
You perch yourself on a rock, watching as lightning flashes in the clouds. The air is heavy with static, but not a single drop of rain falls. It’s like the world can’t decide how it feels, a mess of storms not ready to break, but needing to, the tension rising and rising. Until something gives.
You hear Jasper before you see him. His steps are uncharacteristically heavy, the brush whispering as he walks through it. The air grows impossibly heavier when he comes to an abrupt stop just feet away from you.
It’ll be quick, you think. You hardly have the strength to keep yourself upright, the burning in your throat like hot coals. With what energy you have left, you keep your chin up and slowly turn your gaze away from the clouds to the man behind you.
And you smile. Because it’s Jasper. Your Jasper. Looking just as broken as the first night you stood by him. 
Jasper’s knees practically buckle when you look at him, a wave of fondness warming the air around you. How can you still feel such a thing for him? After all he has done. You must know why he’s here. He doesn’t deserve it, he doesn’t deserve the trust in your eyes.
“Don’t look like that,” you murmur, smile going sad. You can’t stand the guilt twisting those features you love so much. 
Jasper shakes his head, teeth gritting together so hard, his jaw creaks. He doesn’t want this. He can’t. Not with you looking at him like he’s hung the moon. No fear, no hatred. You should despise him.
“It’s not your fault,” you whisper, as if hearing his thoughts.
“Darlin’-” 
He chokes on all the words he wants to say, everything he’s been waiting to say. How he wishes you could see the ocean, like you’ve always wanted. How he wants to be right there with you, just to see the way your eyes light up. How his eternal life finally seemed to have meaning when he met you.
“It’s okay, Jasper. I’m okay.” You reach for him, wanting nothing more than to just take his distress away. That’s all you’ve ever wanted. He gives in, allows you to take his hand, pull him closer. For you, he convinces himself, despite the selfish comfort he finds in your touch. “I know it’s not your decision. This has nothing to do with you,” you hesitate, squeezing his hands softly with a sad smile, “but I’m glad I got to talk to you one last time, at least. It’s not so scary if it’s you.”
“Stop.” His voice cracks like thunder, desperation bleeding into his eyes.
But there’s one last thing you need to say.
“I love you.”
Your eyes drift shut and you tilt your face back to the sky.
A drop of rain traces down your cheek.
Now you’re ready.
“I can’t.”
What?
You peek your eyes open, looking on in shock as Jasper kneels in front of you, face set in the most determined look you’ve ever seen. What’s happening?
“I can’t hurt you. I won’t,” he declares, red eyes set on you without a hint of hesitation.
You gape at him, head suddenly spinning, “But Maria-”
“I won’t let her hurt you either.”
“But Jasper- How- What-”
“Run away with me.”
You blink. And blink. And blink. If you had a working heart, it would be beating out of your chest at this point. Has he lost his mind?
“We’ll go to the States, to the ocean just like you want, leave all this behind.” The words spill out of him, the dam finally broken. Each word makes your eyes go wider, the sadness receding as hope sparks in your chest. “Please, darlin’. Give me a chance to make you happy.”
“Oh, Jasper.” You touch his face, drawing him just close enough to press a kiss to his forehead. Jasper’s eyes flicker shut, your love washing over him like the rain. Your next words seal the rest of your eternity, “You’ve always made me happy. We can go anywhere. As long as I’m with you, I’ll be the happiest woman in the world.”
And for the first time in forever, that smile slants over his lips, bright and warm and gorgeous.
You missed that smile so much.
That night, the two of you disappeared into the storm. You don’t know if Maria ever searched for you. If she did, she never found you.
Jasper kept his word. As soon as you crossed the border, you traveled to the west coast. You saw the ocean, which was more than you ever expected it to be, and that’s where you stayed for a while. Until you met the Cullens, at least.
You were nervous at first. Large covens were rare outside of the armies, so you didn’t trust them at first. There was no way you’d do that ever again. But you missed having a family, and looking at them, you couldn’t help but want for what they seemed to have.
“What do you think, Jas?” You ask your mate as you curl into his side.
He wraps an arm around you, lips pressing against your forehead softly, “Whatever you want, darlin’. They’re intentions seem honorable.”
“Would you be okay going vegetarian, though?” You love the idea. It’s always bothered you, having to kill innocent humans. Even feeding from the bad ones leaves a bad taste in your mouth. 
“I’ll manage,” Jasper chuckles, eyes creasing.
“And the moving around?”
“We already do that, sugar.”
“Oh yah.” The Cullens move around far less than you, actually. You can’t believe they can stay in the same place for months, years even. The thought fills you with anticipation. Maybe you could finally settle down and have a normal life with Jasper.
“Maybe we could get a dog,” you hum, a slow smile spreading across your lips.
Jasper snorts, drawing you closer to press a kiss to your temple. You glance up at him, eyes bright with unrestrained excitement. And just like that, it’s decided.
“Let’s join them.”
“Alright! Oh! We could call him Cowboy! Can you imagine it? Cowboy the dog. It’d be perfect.”
“Anythin’ you want, darlin’.”
And that’s how you ended up with the Cullens.
---
“...wow.”
You grin at Bella, “I know, it’s a lot. But it all worked out for the best! I can’t imagine my life any different.”
“And I can’t imagine my life without you.” Your smile goes even wider when a familiar pair of arms wrap around your waist from behind.
You look over your shoulder at your mate, eyes practically lighting up with affection, “Good, cause you’d be hard pressed to get rid of me at this point.”
Bella watches the small interaction, surprised to see the blond vampire without his usual stoic facade. He’s like a completely different person, practically melting into your touch, and smiling. Actually smiling. And you look just as lovestruck.
“You guys make a cute couple,” she says, feeling a bit awkward when you turn your gaze back to her.
“Thanks Bells. You and Eddie make just as cute of one. I can’t wait to go to your wedding.”
The brunette flushes what must be the darkest shade of red possible, successfully mimicking a cherry. She shuffles away with some muttered excuse, and you can’t hold back a giggle.
“You’re evil, darlin’,” Jasper murmurs, shaking his head.
You flip around in his hold, arms wrapping around his neck, “What! You know it’s going to happen. Edward’s completely smitten with that girl.”
“Still doesn’t mean you have to torture the poor thing,” he chastises, though he can’t hide the mirth in his tone.
“Fine. I guess I can take it easy on her,” you sigh dramatically, earning another chuckle from your mate.
“That’s my girl.”
You tuck yourself into his chest, hiding a truly ecstatic smile in his jacket. To this day, you still can’t believe that this is your life.
You really wouldn’t change anything about it. Not the bad things, not the start, none of it. You like to think your love is stronger because of it. And it will only continue to grow stronger every day for the rest of your eternity together.
You can’t wait to see where the two of you go.
---
This was not meant to get so edgy, but here we are. I never really know what I'm writing until it's finished.
Anyways! I hope you guys enjoyed the angst, hurt and comfort! A really fluffy fic will be coming next, and I am SO excited about it.
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naok-iyuu · 1 month ago
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When the sun falls - Zed Necrodopolis x Reader
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I am so sad one of my biggest comfort character doesn't have much fanfiction to honor him, so I'll try to work myself to fufill my desire and make some of you guys happy ! I am quite not satisfied with what I did, but I've spend so much time on it that it must be published now. (and why are the dialogue with the childhood friend better written than the actual overall fic???) Please do not hesitate to leave prompts or ideas you could have for future fanfictions, I'll gladly read them and write !
English is not my native language, I appologies for any grammar or other mistakes ! Don't hesitate to tell me for future work. Idea from Creative Writing Prompts My Masterlist
No warnings, just highschoolers being highschoolers.
Word count : 2.6k
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. It was when the sun made his smile a little bit brighter that you realised, Zed Necrodopolis was indeed making your heart beat faster.
_
You had taken the habbit of spending time near the football field when school's days were over, not wanting to go home the second the bell rung. Your childhood friend being a player in the seabrook team made it easier to find an excuse as why you were always near the team of shrimps. It became usual for the group of boys to see you, always sitting on the highest bleacher, reading a book or scrolling on your phone when words were too much to bear after a full day of eyeing them on the school board.
Maybe, you sometimes left your eyes wander, watching the jocks run all over the field, tossing balls, and screaming excitedly at each others. It was funny at times, even when you were secretly praying that one of those balls would never have the secret need to kiss your face.
Today wasn't the day you would get hit by a ball, but it was the day your eyes decided that a green haired boy was more interesting than your romance book about a super-hero and the girl he'll never have. Zed was the kind of guy that was easy to get along with. You both weren't close friends strictly speaking, but James, your childhood friend, made it easier to speak to the zombie. Conversations flowed safely when you two spoke, even when James was between you two, trying to feed conversations, hoping he'll get the two of you to become besties and hang out more with him. He was an optimist, something that really brought light to your life since a young age.
Your head was resting on your backpack, your body fully lying on the bleacher seating as the few last minutes of practice were almost over. Your hand hanging down was careful not to touch the ground, there was no way your skin was going to touch something long forgotten by a dirty student. Your eyes attentively followed Zed's green hair like he was the only guy you knew amongs the teenagers. Surely because he was the most noticeable, you had told yourself. Sometimes it hits you, why Zed was so popular amongs the folks in Seabrook. He was the first zombie who got his kind accepted by the humans, he was a good football captain and player. And now that his relationship with Addison ended a few months ago... It was safe to say that girls became a bit more aware of his charms. It would be a lie to say you've never noticed how handsome he looked, you just choose to ignore it, most of the time.
"Hey (L/n) !" Hearing your last name, you let your eyes drift lower to find the blond hair of James calling you with the biggest smile. Waiting down the bleachers, he breathed like he just ran twenty times the field. "Careful there, I can see you drowling from over here."
His voice was loud enought to reach your ears, and loud enought to catch the other boys attentions. He chuckled and a few players followed his humour with amused smiles, catching your attention. You narrowed your eyes, both slightly embarassed and annoyed that he had to call you out in front of all his teammates. You automatically stand up, picking your bag in one, strong hand, and made your way to him down the bleachers, already knowing that practice was over.
"Nice try James, I was just watching if your skills in football were better than mine." Switching you bag from your hand to your shoulder, you defended yourself with the tiniest amused smile, guiding his attention to anything else than you eyeing the captain of his team.
"Oh really ? What do you think then, did I improve myself ?" He asked, his joke long forgotten.
"Not really. You are not even reaching 10% of my football skills." Your smile grew wider as you made fun of him.
"Yeah yeah of course, how about we take that to the fi-"
"Hey James, time to take a shower buddy." You did not notice Zed approaching the two of you, only letting your eyes on him when he stood next to your friend and made his presence known. His elbow nudged James's, earning a scoff from him.
"I was going to, but I still need to take care of the lady remember ?" He moved his finger close to his temple, reminding him of your presence and how important you were.
"Oh I can take care of that, because it smells like death here." He waved his hand in front of his nose, making you chuckle against your will.
James tapped Zed's shoulder, turning himself to leave.
"Look who's talking Necrodopolis." He shook his head, looking at you. "I'll wait for you at the entrance." He then waved later to you, and you did too, smiling at his body leaving in direction of the locker room.
"Looks like you got rid of him." You now looked at Zed, your smile still full of playfulness. His eyes didn't lose time to search yours, raising slightly his head due to you still being on the bleacher stairs. You could have a better look at him this way, and didn't have to raise your head like you usually did. "Was my plan that obvious ?" He added to your teasing with a smile of his own, his body weight shifting on his left foot.
"Totally, I could see you wracking your brain from the football field, wondering how you would get to talk to me without James third wheeling." Funny flirty banter was your thing, whether you used it to smooth the atmosphere or to hint a slight interest. And in Zed's case... Well... You did admit to yourself that he was gorgeous.
"And I could see you staring, didn't know you had a thing for jocks." However, it was less of your thing when a charming boy used the same tricks as you. Zed's words made your cheeks grew pink, something you could easily blame to be the evening sun's fault.
"Just watching you boys play, it's pretty interesting sometimes."
"Only sometimes ?" He raised an amused eyebrow.
"Only sometimes."
"Too bad, I thought the team captain had caught your attention. You know, the handsome player with green hair." He attempted, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.
"Really ? You're the team captain ? Since when ?" You let your face paint itself with a false air of surprise, playing more and more with the jokes he lets you have fun with.
"Oh it's recent, only one or two years since I joined the team. I also often forget how popular I've become." And again he shrugged his shoulders, delivering his line with the most unfazed facial expression you could have seen.
You laughed a bit louder than before, making a twinkle of victory appear in his eyes along with a charming smile. "Alright alright champ, I am just messing with you."
"I wouldn't have guessed." He mocked you a bit more, just to see you roll your eyes and shake your head with yet another giggle. A few seconds pass and Zed's can't help but notice how your eyes seems to have wandered to a thought deep hidden in your head. "What are you thinking about ?" He demanded, lowering his voice not to startle you in case you were already far into your daydream.
"I guess, I never really noticed... But the evening sun really compliments your hair." Too focus on the bright new color the sun created, you can't notice how Zed's cheeks became a lighter shade of pink, contrasting with his very pale skin. Sunddenly aware of his hair color he couldn't help but to run a hand through his locks, his eyes now shifting away from your face. His slight movement appear to break wathever spell you got yourself into and your eyes made their way back to his, not noticing his new attitude.
The next second, his eyes looked back at you, a thought of his own appearing behind the dark of his pupils. "I think I can find something well more complimenting than my crazy green hair. They are totally natural by the way."
His sentence seems to finally knock some sense into you, the very sense you had lost while looking at his hair, and the very same sense you had struggled to get back when your eyes looked at his. "I highly doubt that." Wide eyes take over your features to prove your point and your doubt before being washed by Zed's shaking his head.
"You do ? Okay, give me your hand if you are so sure of yourself." Stretching his hand in your direction, his brown orbs were pleading his case, puppy style, almost encouraging you to trust him.
You rolled your eyes, yet again, placing your hand in his. Your fingers curl around his skin, mimicking the way his just did around your hand. He does not lose the opportunity to take your second hand in his palm while your foot comes down your perch, trying to convince himself that your stability is his top priority. The grassy ground reminds you of how small you are compared to his giraffe heigh, and your head must now look up to gaze at his face. You tried to erase the thought his is skin being soft against yours, his hands being, oh so large, around your girl sized baby hands. But the task was way more difficult than you had imagined. In a soft motion, he exchanged both of your spot by making you rotate with him, his back was now facing the bleachers while you were greeted with the powerful sun on your face. You wondered how you did not became blind on the spot while Zed's face moved around tring to find several different angle to look at you. The skin on his face, moving without warning, cartooned his expressions which made you giggle. He looked so focused on his task that it made you feel self conscious about your look. "What you are doing ?" You try to quiet your giggle while your eyes followed his every move.
He focused his gaze on your eyes again, smiling with satisfaction. "The sun really compliments your eyes, they are beautiful."
At that moment, you couldn't quite grasp if it was the way he looked at you, or the way his voice gently complimented you, or maybe if it was just the fact that you were lying to yourself about being attracted to him, putting that affirmation far behind the fact that he was just charming. But his words stole all the air from your lungs and you felt extremely hot in a matter of seconds. His gaze didn't drift from yours, just admiring you even if he noticed the shy mess he just made of you. He was enough of a gentleman to not make a comment about it, and just appreciated it. Your thoughts racing faster than a rocket made your eyes dance in every direction possible, trying to find your words and confidence from earlier. Acknowledging the fact that you needed to respond, you bit your lower lip, trying to find the air you once had in your lungs.
"They are pretty common, really." You tried to put his words above your head, high enough so you wouldn't think nor take them for what they were.
"Have you seen my eyes ? That's what you can call common, you can even call them poop brown." His joke diverted you from your previous thoughts, obtaining, like it was a precious gift, another laugh from you. You shook your head and, at last, looked at him again. "Are you serious ? Have you seen your eyes under the sun's rays ?" It was easy to compliment other people, you would even shove their face in whatever you could find if that meant they could see how fine you thought they looked. But when it came to you, compliments, praises, were not allowed. Hell you even made yourself think that it was forbidden. But in that moment, you could see the determination in Zed's eyes to fight you teeth and nails just to make you hear him.
"My point, your eyes are beautiful." You were about to dismiss him again when he cut you out before he even saw you mouth starting to move. "And I am winning this one, you can no longer contradict me."
You sighed a small 'okay', your being eating you from inside so you would, in fact, contradict him. His eyes were quick to make you forget what you were going to fight for, and even quicker to make you wonder if something was indeed happening between you two. You couldn't shake those thoughts, maybe you were a hopeless romantic, but you guys were flirting... Right ? Not being able to read your thoughts made Zed's bite the inside of his cheek. Your face was an open book, James didn't lie about that when he talked about you. He could see the wheels turning behind your eyes, and your eyebrows moving to every feeling and image your brain was sending you. He decided to catch your attention once more.
"Hey, I was wondering..." His voice was gentle, almost feeling like the comfiest pillow you would want to lie on. "Would you like to-"
"Hey Necrodopolis ! What's taking you so long, practice over and I want to go home !" The strong voice of the coach resounded in your ears, making you jump on the spot. He almost made you have a heart attack.
Zed's eyes widened with frustration, his head falling backward in an attempt to regain some control over his emotions. His tongue licked his lips, almost bitting it. He turned his head to look at his coach who called him from the locker room doors. "I am coming, I just need to-"
"You'll talk to your girlfriend tomorrow ! Go take a shower and go home champ." You could see from afar the coach tapping his foot against the ground, Zed surely had ran out of talking privilege.
He sighed, turning his gaze to look at you with tiny apologising eyes. "I am sorry I have to go, coach orders." You nodded to show that you understood and didn't hold it against him. With a last and gentle 'I'll see you tomorrow' his hands softly left yours before jogging in the adult direction who seemed to scold him when he arrived in front of him, and maybe tease him a little.
Your hands suddenly felt cold, sinking in the fact your brain had erased on purpose. His hands had hold yours mid conversation and didn't let go. You haven't even thought more about it on the spot, like it was natural. Your heart was beating a bit faster than usual, it took a deep breath to ground yourself. It was when the sun made his smile a little bit brighter that you had realised, Zed Necrodopolis was indeed making your heart beat faster. And you were totally going to blame the sun for it.
"I guess you were too busy and forgot to meet me at the school entrance." James had reached your side from god knows where, his football uniform long forgotten and changed into some random t-shirt and sweat pants. He looked at you with a cocked eyebrow and the most annoying smirk he could have made up on the spot.
You shook your head from your previous thoughts to now fight your childhood friend who seemed to want to have fun about the fact he had left you alone with his captain. "You sure you showered ? That was pretty fast." The best defense is a good offense you convinced yourself, praying that James would leave you off the hook.
You started to walk away, hearing his foot following you closely before adding. "So, can you finally tell me what zombies taste like or am I, still, supposed to wait ?"
"Oh my f-..udging god !"
"Argh almost won a dollar in the swearing jar with this one." -.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Am I tweaking or James parts are actually better ?
Thanks for taking the time to read my first work ! Like I said on top of the post, I am really not satisfied with how it turned out. I just feel like I did my boy dirty TwT I might be so in love that I can't even focus when writing about Zed, the sun's fault though ;)
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xpao-bearx · 2 years ago
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"Like A Virgin"
Steven Grant x Fem!Reader/Jake Lockley x Fem!Reader/Marc Spector x Fem!Reader
Read Part 1 HERE
Read Part 3 HERE
Read Part 4 HERE
NOTES: Y'ALL the way my jaw literally DROPPED when not even H A L F a minute after I posted the first part, you guys were already exploding my notifs which I wasn't expecting AT ALL I swear Oscar Isaac's really got us sluts in a chokehold O_o
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOUUU!!! 😭❤️❤️❤️ This is truly wonderful and encourages me a lot, especially since this is my first ever Moon Knight fic AND the first time a story of mine blew up this much! This is also great cuz I've been terribly sick, but of course ✨️priorities✨️ I gotta shower our Moon Boys with some much deserved lovin' and it's just so fucking nice to see that it's paying off! \(^o^)/ I was so happy and inspired that I couldn't resist and just HAD to write this second part ASAP!
Dissociative identity disorder is also briefly mentioned here and if I made any mistakes, then I apologize and please kindly correct me. And I feel like the ending may be a bit rushed, but it's the best my tiny brain could think of!
I'll shut up now and I'm very proud and excited to present... PART 2!!! 🥳 And if you'd like to be tagged for any of the next parts, feel free to tell me!
Also Marc does something very asshole-y here oop
TAGS: @autismsupermusicalassassin @ungracefularchimedes @pimosworld @ababynova @sweatyroadcowboyjudge @anapnovo-blog @am-3-thyst @harrys-tittie @zukoisbabee @wiltedwonderland
Part 2: You made me feel I've nothing to hide
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After work, instead of heading home, you rushed straight to the nearest boutique to buy yourself a new dress for tomorrow night. The butterflies in your stomach were doing somersaults and you felt as if you could spontaneously burst into song like in those cheesy musicals your former college roommate was so obsessed with.
You knew the employees were all looking at you oddly as you constantly giggled to yourself like some lovesick schoolgirl while you perused through endless racks of the latest fashion. Of course you knew you were acting ridiculous--crazy--but wasn't that what attraction or, dare you say, love did to you?
Besides, you wanted tomorrow to go perfectly. In your eyes, Steven Grant was already perfect--perfectly imperfect or imperfectly perfect, you didn't know or care which was which. You just knew that you liked him. A lot.
And it relieved and pleased you to the moon and back that he actually felt the same! So, who cares what anyone else thought?
You just hoped that after tomorrow, Steven would like you enough to go on another date. And another. Then another...
Maybe you were looking--wishing--too far into the future, but you swore you could almost hear wedding bells chiming in the distance.
God, is this what happens after being a total virgin for twenty-something years? There was absolutely nothing wrong with being a virgin, but your insecurity bugged you. What if you weren't at all what Steven expected?
But another part of you, a positive ray of sunshine, clobbered all your doubts. For once, you were going to be brave! You were going to take a leap of faith! You were going to control your life!
Because, in the end...it was worth it. Steven was worth it. Sure, you've experienced various crushes throughout your life, but not like this. Not with Steven. This felt more...serious. Adult.
It felt as if right from the get-go crossing fates with "Steven with a V", your life was about to change--for the better.
Of course you were afraid, and yet you've also never been more sure of something in your entire existence. You've been waiting this long and you're glad you did, and now you were ready to jump head first (and head over heels) into whatever adventure was in store for you--with Steven.
You then squealed excitedly when you spotted the perfect dress, ignoring the judgmental stares other customers shot you as you hurriedly grabbed it like a child in a toy store.
Yes, tomorrow was going to be a dream come true.
♡•••🌙•••♡
You arrived at the restaurant thirty minutes early. It was totally embarrassing how eager you were, but you couldn't help yourself. Though at least with how early you were, you snagged a good table overlooking the restaurant's beautiful back garden strung with fairy lights and you can have some time to calm down before Steven came.
And you looked stunning. Your hair tumbled down in elegant waves, light makeup adoring your face and donning the contact lenses you rarely used. And the dress you bought fit like a glove; it was the shortest dress you now owned, stopping around your thighs. It was baby blue and had an off-the-shoulder style with some frills, and it hugged your figure just right.
You felt very self-conscious. You've always fancied clothes like this, but never actually had the guts to wear them--until now. Did it really suit you? But you couldn't deny that you were happy and, truly, isn't that all that mattered?
"Shall I get you started, ma'am?" A waitress snapped you back to reality and you shook your head.
"Not yet, thank you. I'm still waiting for my...date." The word made you blush furiously, as if sharing a dirty little secret.
The waitress smiled and nodded, leaving you by yourself once more as you sighed wistfully.
You took out your phone from your purse, checking the time. 6:45 p.m. Alright, not too long now. And you double checked that the address you texted Steven was correct, which it is.
You settled back in your chair, peering over the garden and giggling softly.
"I'm right here for you, Steven."
♡•••🌙•••♡
"It's about time, innit?" Steven murmured, glancing over anxiously at his wristwatch for the umpteenth time. It was already eight p.m., a whole hour past your meeting time (not to mention he arrived embarrassingly early). And he was just informed by one of the servers that the restaurant was closing in thirty minutes, to which a pitiful look was also casted to him.
"It's not 'about time', Steven. It's late." Marc gruffly pointed out, Steven seeing Marc's reflection glaring back at him from the shiny silver flower vase set in the middle of the table. "Face it: she's NOT coming."
"Don't you dare say that." Steven's voice was barely above a whisper, but there was a certain edge to it that one would normally not hear from the soft man. "Y/N would never do that. Not her. She's just running late, I'm sure. Traffic and all."
"Oh, please, we both know that even the traffic here doesn't take this long." Marc scoffed. "Stop kidding yourself, Steven. She's. NOT. Coming."
Steven frowned, and with a shaky hand he pulled out his phone. He should've called you since way earlier. It was the logical thing to do, after all. But he was...scared. Scared that, maybe, a terrifying maybe, Marc was right.
He found your number and called you, pressing his phone to his ear as it began to ring. He didn't realize he was holding his breath until you finally picked up, voice groggy.
"Hello..?"
"Y/N..." Steven heaved a relieved exhale. "Hey, uh, I'm at the restaurant. Guess you got stuck in traffic?" He chuckled halfheartedly.
A long, dreadful pause. And then:
"Fucking EXCUSE me?"
Steven's eyes widened, having never heard you swear before. He was just about to ask what was wrong when you continued without skipping a beat.
"Are you playing with me, Steven? Is this what it is?!" You definitely sounded angry, but he didn't miss the faint sniffles coming from you. Shit, were you crying? What the hell was happening?
"How can you be such a...such a DICK?!" You shouted, causing him to jerk his phone a few inches away from his ear. "I fucking waited for you like a total idiot until closing time, you prick! You never showed and you never answered my calls! What the fuck can you POSSIBLY gain from toying with me, huh?!"
"W-Wait, I don't understand!" Steven was nearly hyperventilating, all the colour draining from his face and his mind running a mile a minute. "I-I'm here! Right now! D-Didn't we agree? Friday night, seven p.m.?"
You were dead silent. Steven was going to check if the call was still connected when you beat him to it.
"Steven... It's Sunday."
Steven froze. Then his eyes landed on Marc's reflection, refusing to meet his gaze and it clicked.
"Y/N." Steven said slowly, steadily, despite feeling like crying himself. His eyes were still on Marc, cold and pissed. "Please. I promise I have an explanation. I just... God, can we meet? Y/N, please, I'll come to you."
"No need." Tears threatened to spill from Steven's despondent eyes at your flat response, before you suddenly added: "I'll come to you. You said you were at the restaurant, right? Stay there."
You ended the call, and Steven flared at Marc--no longer caring if other people perceived him as a lunatic fighting with himself.
"Why the fuck would you do that, Marc?"
"Steven..." Marc struggled to find the right words, and the asshole actually had the audacity to look ashamed. "Listen, she's nothing but a distraction--"
"You always think you know better, yeah?" Steven laughed humourlessly. "A distraction? YOU stop kidding yourself, Marc. This is not just your life, but mine. And it's about fucking time you stop being such a selfish bastard!"
"Um, sir?" Steven winced, greeted by a baffled waiter. "We'll be closing soon, so I'm gonna have to ask you to leave if you're not ordering anything."
Humiliated and repeatedly babbling apologies, Steven abruptly sprang out of his chair and dashed outside. He sighed deeply and collapsed listlessly on the ground, finally allowing the tears to fall.
He vaguely heard footsteps approaching until he saw a pair of worn bunny slippers in front of him. His eyes heavily dragged upwards, finding you staring back at him with an unreadable expression and breaths coming out in ragged pants.
"Y/N!" Steven jumped up, surprised you actually came despite the way he--the way Marc--treated you. Your bloodshot eyes and the dried tears on your cheeks only made him feel even shittier, much more fucked up than any beating he suffers on a mission.
Because at least with those, he can be confident that he and the boys would win no matter the challenge. But with you?
He had everything to lose.
Your hair was a total mess; glasses slightly crooked and you were in your pyjamas, a matching set of a purple tank top and shorts with stars and moons. The only thing you had covering you was a purple silk robe, drawing it closer to your chilly body as your eyes narrowed at Steven.
You should be mad at him, and you were. Still, despite everything, you hopped on to the first bus you saw and scrambled the rest of the way here as fast as you could.
But now that you were here...what in Khonshu's name were you going to do? You could scream at him with all the pain you haven't had the pleasure to release like you did on the phone, but you'd just be wasting your breath. Then again, he wasn't lying. He really is here. And it confused you more than anything.
And seeing him like this, looking so...sad. Well, it made you sad. Him miserably clenching onto a heart shaped chocolate box, fat globs of tears cascading down his cheeks as he gawked at you with his pretty doe brown eyes.
You raised your hand, and Steven shut his eyes as he braced himself for the slap he very much deserved--only to be met with your soft palm, wiping away his tears tenderly.
"Explain to me, Steven."
♡•••🌙•••♡
The travel to Steven's apartment was spent in deafening silence, but it brought upon a strange sort of comfort. Unconsciously, you hugged Steven's black jacket that he had offered you earlier even closer to your much smaller frame. It soothed your nerves, being completely enveloped in his smell; fresh soap with a hint of musky cologne.
Once you reached his unit, you couldn't help but smile. It was just so...Steven. It was a bit messy, but a good kind of messy. You didn't really know how to describe it, but it warmed your heart especially when you saw a giant fish tank with only one goldfish.
"Cuppa tea?" Steven asked to which you shook your head, facing him fully.
"No. I'm a 'get over it' kinda girl so whatever your explanation is, I'd rather we just nip it in the bud." You huffed before you halted, biting your lip. "Oh, uh, sorry... Of course, if you wanna have tea, you can. It's your home, after all."
Steven laughed, his first real laugh that entire day. "Are you always this nice to blokes you should be mad at?"
"Only if they are really into Egyptology and have beautiful brown eyes and gorgeous curls." You rolled your eyes though you couldn't suppress your grin before you cleared your throat, getting a hold of your stupid giddy self. "Now, explain."
Steven's demeanour instantly shifted, serious now and quite uneasy. But he nodded and gestured towards the couch. You walked over and plopped down, Steven sitting next to you and keeping a respectful couple inches between the two of you.
He looked down at the ground, carefully considering his words before meeting your gaze solemnly. "Have you ever heard of dissociative identity disorder?" You nodded, previously learning about it in Psychology class and researching about it due to personal interest. "That's...what I have. I'm an alter within a system, and there are two others--Marc Spector and Jake Lockley."
"Am I correct to assume that when you asked me out...it wasn't actually you?"
Steven blinked, rather startled that you were taking this so well. "Yes. Jake was the one who asked you out."
"Was he also the one who didn't show up for the date?"
"No, that would be Marc." He grumbled. "And listen, I'm truly sorry about him. He's a right twit. It may not have been me who didn't show up, but that absolutely doesn't excuse the hurt it caused you. I am so, so sorry, Y/N."
Your brows furrowed, mulling over this new revelation. But...you believed him, especially when it explained all those times you secretly caught Steven muttering incoherently to himself or staring at his reflection and quietly reacting to something. You were curious about more, of course, but Steven didn't have any reason to lie about such a serious matter. And if he was lying, there were plenty of other things he could say. But the way he acted, and just the look in his eyes--he knew the risks of opening up to you, but he did it anyway.
You clasped his hands in yours, sighing. "I know I look calm right now, but trust me, I'm freaking the fuck out." You chuckled, and Steven felt safe enough to join you. "But... I trust you, Steven. And I believe you. Tell me one thing, though. Are you...into me? Like, at all?"
"Of course I am!" He replied in a flash, making you both pause before erupting into easy laughter. "Why would you even have to ask that, love?"
"It's just... Well, if Jake was the one who asked me out, it made me wonder if you really did like me." You mumbled, looking away.
Steven gently grasped your chin, tipping your face back towards him. "I've liked you since the day we met, Y/N. In your pink skirt and the cute little pigtails you had." He smiled, eyes so amorous and gleaming with sincerity. "Truth is, I've wanted to ask you out since forever. I'm just not as...forward as Jake is."
"And that's fine. But hey, we gotta thank him 'cause Lord knows I'd just spiral into a panic attack if I ever made the first move." You chuckled. But it gradually died down as Steven continued to stare at you, and you never thought you would ever have someone look at you the way Steven did; as if you were precious treasure hidden within a sacred tomb.
Slowly, ever so slowly, your body started moving of its own accord. You were leaning closer, closer, closer--a mere breath away from his lips before he piped up.
"I'm also Khonshu's Avatar!"
"Say what?"
"Um, well, you see--" He stammered, mentally slapping himself.
'Don't say anything, Steven.' Marc warned, and it took all of Marc's willpower not to seize control and actually slap Steven.
But it was too late now. Steven already said too much, but he wanted to be honest with you. Utterly so. And since you wanted to nip this in the bud, now was the best time more than anything.
"Erm... You've seen the news, yeah?" He didn't grant you the chance to respond as he rambled. "Masked vigilantes... Moon Knight and Mr. Knight? They're actually...Marc and I."
"Steven, this is--"
"I'll show you, Y/N. I'll summon the suit."
"Summon the soup? What is happening--"
Steven stood up, and a split second later there was a whirl of white. And sure enough, there was none other than one half of the mysterious heroes you've been seeing a lot on the news recently; his glowing white eyes locked with yours, crisp ivory suit and batons clutched tightly in his hands.
"Look, I know this is a lot to take in--"
"Handsome..." You blurted out before you can restrain yourself.
"Huh?" Steven blushed underneath the mask, and you were the same as your cheeks tinted crimson. Then you rose from the couch, closing the gap between you two and removing his mask.
His curls stuck every which way and his eyes were as wide as the full moon, making you giggle. "You're so handsome, Steven. And yeah, this is a fucking lot to take in. To be honest, a part of me is still wondering if this is all just a dream." You reached up, caressing the side of his face sweetly and smiling. "But...thank you. Thank you for being honest with me."
His batons dropped to the floor, trembling hands hesitantly settling on your hips. You noticed his Adam's apple bob as he looked down at you, tears once again glistening in his eyes. Happiness, relief, adoration--how can so many exhilarating emotions crash over him all at once?
"Can I be more honest?" He whispered, resting his forehead against yours as he gazed deeply into your eyes. "I...want you to stay with me."
Your cheeks hurt from how impossibly wide your smile has stretched, wrapping your arms around his neck and nuzzling his nose with yours.
"I'm staying whether you like it or not, Steven with a V."
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mokulule · 2 years ago
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Ghastly Glacial Goodies
What is this Moku? Another AU? Yep, sorry not sorry. It's cute okay! I'm gonna be doing illustrations and stuff. Also ice cream, who doesn't love ice cream? I blame this like 70% on @clockwaysarts cause they were playing around with a blob popsicle design (a blobsicle XD) and this thing spawned. Thanks to the people who took part in brainstorming on the Dead on Main server.
Chapter 1 - Polaris
The evening was dreary that day. Jason couldn’t tell you what had made him want to take a pre-patrol walk of all things. The light drizzle wasn’t terrible, but he’d been out so long his hair was plastered wetly to his forehead. The sun hadn’t quite gone down yet, but the clouds stole a lot of the light. A white mist had rolled in from the bay, softening the corners of buildings, and it almost made the world feel unreal. It dampened the sounds of the city and echoed his steps.
That was when he heard it, like little bells or a music box, a haunting tune. He frowned and followed the beckoning sound. He knew that melody, though it played a bit slow. What was the name again? He walked, unknowingly matching the notes as they slowly gained speed. A sense of urgency rose in his chest. He turned a corner and froze, stunned.
In the light from a hazy streetlight was an ice cream truck.
In this weather? Jason’s befuddled brain protested as he took in the downright baffling sight of the truck and the surprisingly many customers in line as well as the groups of people chatting and smiling eating ice cream in the rain.
The truck was all soft rounded edges with minty green accents, a cartoon ghost that looked as surprised as Jason felt with wide eyes and a mouth in an o decorated the side of the truck beside the counter. A quaint canopy stretched out over the counter. Its white and pastel pink stripes ended in festive tapered triangles which looked more at home at a fair, than some random street in Gotham. Apropos Jason looked up trying to figure out where he was, but didn’t find any street signs, just the sign telling him this street was a dead end.
The music was still playing, pleasant bells clinging softly. It didn’t feel so urgent now. He remembered the song suddenly: In the Hall of the Mountain King. A strange song for an ice cream truck, Jason thought as he walked to the back of the line. In the play wasn’t it for when Peer Gynt was escaping the mountain? That seemed in a way like the opposite of what an ice cream truck should signal. But then again as long as people recognized the song that would draw them in anyway. It was still a very impressive line for the weather.
The line moved slowly but steadily. The happy chatter was like a comforting blanket of background noise and Jason felt his shoulders slowly relax. He reached a sign that showed off various shaped ice creams on sticks in the shape of what looked like cartoon people and a happy green… blob? with red eyes called a blobsicle. It was a ghost Jason suddenly realized, of course that was the theme going by the truck.
Polaris the sign said in big swirly letters and then underneath in a smaller type it said “Ghastly Glacial Goodies” - someone had really wanted the alliteration there, Jason thought bemused. That person might be the young man behind the counter who just wished a girl and her mother a good night, before turning to the last person before Jason. I was hard to judge the man’s height since he was inside the truck, but he struck Jason as short, he was on the slender side an impression only enhanced by the formfitting green striped west and the way he whipped around inside the truck filling the newest order.
Apparently the current customer was buying for his friends, there had been pointing to a waving group standing a few yards away. It gave Jason another moment to ponder his options. The glass shield had stickers on it detailing the various scoopable options - they included such gems as Booberry, Spookistacchio and Rum and Raising, which had a small cartoon zombie on its sticker. Jason felt almost like he could have stayed there all day chuckling over all the silly puns, they had certainly committed to the bit.
Finally the last order was handed over with a wide smile. The ice cream guy exuded such a genuine warmth, that had nothing to do with the actual temperature - in fact it was really cold Jason noted as he sniffled to stop his nose from running.
Finally ice cream guy, Danny his name tag said, faced Jason in his classic ice cream man glory; striped vest, sleeves rolled up to his elbows he even had a silly little hat in his unruly black hair, it was a miracle it stayed on.
Danny looked a bit startled to see him, but then his smile was back and he leaned on the counter slightly to be eye level with Jason. Jason felt his breath hitch just slightly in his throat; It was almost like those blue eyes sparkled like stars.
“Why hello there, haven’t seen you around Polaris before.”
Jason shook himself out of it, grasping for something to say in return, what popped into his head was the oddity of the music, what came out was, “So are you the Troll King?”
For a moment everything was silent, then Danny burst out laughing. Hand over his mouth, he leaned on the counter. His shoulders shook as he tried to contain his snickering.
“You-“ he lost control and laughed, “are the first person” - more laughing - “to remark on the music.”
The laughter was infectious and Jason found himself chuckling. His cheeks hurt slightly from smiling. He wasn’t sure when he’d last smiled this much.
Danny finally gained control over his laughter. He peeked up at Jason through his fingers from where he was practically lying over the counter.
“Not quite the Troll King,” he snickered again before straightening up and gesturing around himself “but welcome to my castle of ghastly glacial goodies.”
“Did you have to think hard on that one?”
Danny’s face turned mock serious. “You have no idea, there were even thesauruses involved.” Then in a lower voice he added to himself, “violent little bastards.”
“What was that?” Jason said, not sure he heard that right.
“Never mind,” Danny smiled, “so what can I do for you? You’re my last customer of the night.”
Jason frowned confused and looked around. To his shock, somehow everyone had left without him even noticing, it was just him, Danny and the truck in the lamplight. He had to be really off his game tonight maybe he was coming down with a cold. He sniffled again and saw Danny frown worriedly. Ice cream wasn’t suitable for the wet weather, but it seemed silly to have stood in line and not get any.
“Do you have any recommendations?”
“Well, all ice cream is made by yours truly so I can’t really pick a favorite, but bloop of the month is Rum and Raising.”
Of course it was the zombie one, wait-
“Bloop?”
“Yeah instead of scoops? I was told it was cuter than gloops.”

Jason blinked.
“Here let me show you.” Danny grabbed a cone and expertly swirled the ice cream scoop round his fingers once before scooping up a mostly round ball of Rum and Raising and plopping it in the cone, he then considered for moment before adding another scoop, this time of “Cosmic Crunch”. He then pressed four small round red gummies into the ice cream, two on each “bloop” and held it out for Jason to inspect and huh, they had eyes now - a bit similar to the Blobsicle actually, except these were stacked on top of each other. It was a kinda cute idea, kids probably loved it.
Jason took the ice cream.
“How much do I owe you?”
“Four dollars, and this is on the house.“ He pushed a cardboard cup of steaming coffee towards Jason on the counter. “That will bring back a bit of life to you, you’re looking a bit ghastly.”
“Ha ha, very funny.” Jason rolled his eyes, but he was feeling pretty cold and he sniffled again as he found the money and put it on the counter next to the cup. “But thanks anyway.”
“Have a good night.” Danny smiled warmly and Jason couldn’t help but smile in return. He lifted the cup as a salute and turned around to walk away. He took a small sip and instantly felt warmth spread in his chest. That really hit the spot. He kept sipping at the coffee until a drip of melted ice cream hit his fingers and reminded him of the ice cream.
Oh yeah, he had paid for this.
He licked at the droplet and quickly followed it back up the cone to make sure there would be no more dripping. Cosmic crunch he quickly discovered was hazelnut with lots of crunchy nuts and he didn’t really know how to classify the rest. There was something indefinably delicious about it. Yes, it was all the things ice cream should be, creamy, smooth, rich, but there was something more. Like something he never knew he needed. Before he realized it he was down to the last bits and biting into the cone. Only a few more bites and it was gone.
That was-
It was easily the most delicious ice cream he ever had, but not only that; he felt sated, calm and almost floaty. Was the ice cream drugged? Alarmed at the thought, he spun around, but all that met him was a long empty street with no ice cream truck in sight.
Had he really walked that far already?
He would track down the ice cream truck later. He looked at his phone, it was almost midnight. How odd… He must have stood in line longer than he thought. No patrol was happening tonight, he realized with a yawn. He was much too tired.
The walk to his apartment was a blur, and it felt like it was only a couple of steps until he fell over on top of his bed, clothes and all. Everything was so fuzzy and nice.
Jason slept with no nightmares.
-
Okay, so this is definitely a small back burner project I'm working on, so don't expect any regular-ish updates, they are gonna happen when they happen. And now that I've gotten that out of my system I can hopefully focus writing the next bit for Catnip.
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five-and-dimes · 2 months ago
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Sunbeam
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Part 4 of 4
Using the Dreaming Bingo Adoptable prompt: Sleeping In
Rating: Mature
Ship: Dreamling
Warnings: Past abuse (not explicit, just implied past warprize things)
Additional Tags: Cat!Dream, Cow!Hob, King/warprize, hurt/comfort,
Summary: The Happy Ending 😌
Read on AO3
By the time Hob makes it back to his room, finally released from a dull morning council meeting, it is nearly afternoon. And Dream is still fast asleep.
The sight of him never fails to make Hob’s heart swell.
It has been five years now since Dream was first given to him, a scared, shivering, wounded thing. And all the long years of healing, of growing together, are more than worth it for mornings like these. Dream is sprawled across their shared bed, long limbs stretching to every corner, basking in the sunlight that falls over the mattress. Hob always opens the curtains before he leaves for his morning duties for this precise reason. 
He approaches slowly, not willing to wake his love just yet. His eyes roam over Dream’s body, smiling at how much he’s changed. Certainly he is still a lithe and lanky creature, but no longer are his bones sharp and cutting through his skin. There is a softness and a strength to him now, lean muscle filling him out and a gentle give to his stomach from years of plentiful food, and milk whenever he desired it. He is still pale, but now there is a healthy glow to him, and his fur is glossy and thick. Most importantly though, Hob revels in the peace on Dream’s face, the way his lips curl in a smile even in his sleep, body warm and lax in the sun.
Hob loves him so very much.
Sitting gingerly on the edge of the bed, he cannot help but also feel a surge of pride whenever his gaze falls on the collar and bell around Dream’s neck. Currently it is the only thing Dream is wearing, a marvel when Hob remembers how scared he used to be to let his robe reveal any part of him. Now he lays nude in the sun without any fear, and Hob is so happy he could weep. The collar, though. Dream rarely takes it off.
The memory is still bright, the way Dream had been cradled in his arms, as he so often was by then, relaxed and boneless and purring against his chest. Their breaths had evened out after their love-making, the sweat drying and cooling their skin, but neither had felt any inclination to move. But Hob had felt a tiny surge of confidence and daring in the post coital haze, and he knew he had to take advantage of it before it faded.
“Love,” he began softly, grinning when he felt Dream’s ears twitch towards him in attention, “Do you know about the collar I wear?”
Shifting in his arms, Dream had leaned back enough to look at him curiously, “How do you mean?” He glanced over Hob’s shoulder where the collar in question lay in an ornate case, “It is… jewelry?”
Hob let out a huff of laughter, “Well, yes I suppose,” He pet down Dream’s back as he chose his words carefully, nervously, “But it is more than that. For us here in the bovine kingdom, at least,” he explained. “It is not a collar in the way other kingdoms might view one. Have you noticed that no other in the palace wears one?”
Dream furrowed his brow in consideration, “I suppose, now that you mention it…”
Sitting up, regretfully disentangling from Dream, Hob reached over to the side table, opening up one of the drawers and pulling out a box, similarly decorated to the one his own collar sat in. He still remembers how he held it in his lap, turning to face Dream fully and taking a deep breath to steel himself.
“For us, it is the equivalent to a crown.”
He opened the box, and inside was a collar, nearly identical to his own, though slightly smaller, designed for a slimmer neck. The jewels were rubies instead of sapphires, and the bell was rounder and more delicate, as opposed to the heavy, squared bell of Hob’s own. Dream’s breath caught in his throat.
“I want you to have one,” Hob said softly, “It’s not a collar,” he reiterated desperately, “It’s not… not a thing of ownership. I don’t own you, my love. No one does. But… I want everyone who sees you to know just how important you are. To know that you are my equal, and deserve just as much respect.”
When he finally gained the courage to look up, Dream was crying. There was a moment when he had worried he had ruined everything, had scared his poor love in a way he swore he never would again. But then, Dream met his eyes, and the look in them was nothing short of awe.
“You would…” he swallowed thickly, “You would give me such a thing? You would make me… more? More than just a…” his voice cracked, and he could not get the rest out.
Hob had tossed the box to the side, something far more precious in front of him. He wrapped Dream in his arms, pressing him close, “You are my love,” he said firmly, “My heart, my partner, my everything. You have always been so much more than you were allowed to be. I just want everyone to see it.”
He held him tight, and then Dream had kissed him, and he had known that everything would be okay. They made love again, both of them wearing nothing but their matching collars, and in the morning they started planning their wedding.
And now they are here, years later, and he is in no less awe of the love he has found in the man laying before him. Reaching out, Hob places a gentle hand on Dream’s belly, stifling a laugh when Dream stirs with a soft ‘mrrrp?’. Dream blinks, ears twitching to attention as he stretches his limbs impossibly further as he wakes. Reaching down, Hob runs his fingers through the fur along Dream’s chest and stomach. He still remembers the awe and glee he had felt the first time his fingers had brushed against the soft fuzz of new fur growing along Dream’s body.
Dream had been embarrassed, and ashamed (it had taken a long, long time for Dream to let go of the shame he felt for what other people had done to him). He had explained softly that much of his fur had fallen out over the years of mistreatment. He also quickly offered to shave it off if Hob didn’t like it.
But Hob loved it. He loved seeing the proof of Dream’s healing, had carefully tended to the new fur for weeks, and even now still took great pleasure in brushing the dark strands until they shone. He hadn’t fully realized how thin the areas where he did have fur were, either, until his arms and legs slowly became covered in dense, dark fur, the skin no longer visible through it. Petting him now, Dream presses happily into his hands, and Hob cannot resist leaning down to pull him into a kiss. 
“Good morning, beloved,” Dream mumbles against his lips. When they part, he yawns widely, and Hob can’t resist tapping his finger against his long, sandpaper tongue when it is revealed. As he alway does when Hob teases him in this way, Dream snaps his teeth down, Hob only just barely pulling away in time with a laugh.
It took a long time for Hob to see these parts of his love’s personality- the parts that are feisty and proud and demanding and playful. It only made Hob love him impossibly more.
“It is not quite morning anymore, my dear,” he grins, “You missed breakfast.”
Dream hums in consideration, eyes half lidded as he reaches out to brush a finger against Hob’s chest, the barest hint of claw grazing the spot where his teat is hidden by fabric, “It seems more like breakfast has come to me.”
Hob shivers, taking Dream’s hand to press a kiss to his knuckles with a smile, “Insatiable creature,” he says fondly.
“Is that a complaint?” Dream raises an eyebrow.
“Never,” Hob responds, aiming for teasing but filled with far too much sincerity, “How might I serve my beloved this day?”
Dream smiles slowly, fond and mischievous, “You can start,” he drawls, tugging on Hob’s hand to guide him down onto the bed, “by not blocking my sunbeam.”
Hob bursts into laughter, laying back obediently onto the bed so that Dream can sprawl on top of him, settling comfortably with Hob’s softness at his front, and the sun’s warmth at his back.
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dellalyra · 1 year ago
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JUJUTSU KAISEN - Where do they take you on your first date?
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A/N: pixie attempts headcanons.
N A N A M I
Nanami is definitely bringing you to dinner. It’s classic, timeless and tried and tested. He’ll pick a nice restaurant, not pretentious or obnoxious and very cosy - with good food. He’s showing up to pick you up with a simple bouquet of flowers, after dinner perhaps a stroll in the nearest park or he will walk you home.
G E T O
I feel like Geto is a coffee shop date guy. Simple but casual. He’ll show up with that damn smirk in a black oversized sweatshirt and pay for both your coffees. It’s just easy with him, there’s no airs or graces and god do you have fun. He leans over the table to wipe some foam from your lower lip and then licks said foam off his own thumb, maintaining eye contact the whole time.
G O J O
The most gorgeous little French patisserie, all soft colours and macarons and cream puff pastries. He’d feeding you little pastries the whole time and you don’t think you’ve ever seen such delight in a person’s eyes or laughed as much in your life. Neither of you want the date to be over, so it carries over into buying take home desserts and sitting on the balcony of his penthouse apartment, giggling as he manoeuvres you into his lap and you battle it out on Mario Kart.
M E G U M I
Bookshop. Don’t @ me on this. It’s cute, he has two hot chocolates in hand as he picks you up and then you stroll around the large bookshop picking up books to recommend each other, you end up buying one for the other to read. Before you part ways, you grip his scarf and pull his head down to your lips and kiss him gently and quickly.
“Bye, ‘Gumi.”
Adorable, he’s so blushy you might faint.
Y U U J I
ARCADE. He lets you win everything. Wins you 100 prizes and you’re following him around like he’s an excited puppy. He gets really excited because he wanted to show off so he decides to do just that by setting the record on the boxing machine. When the highest record lights and bells ring out he pulls you into his arms and spins you around and kisses you in a flurry of excitement. Seems shocked with himself when he sets you down, he goes to apologise but you just pull him to kiss you again.
C H O S O
Okay hear me out. The aquarium. He wouldn’t know really where to go so you suggest the aquarium, it’s one of your favourite places and you think he’d enjoy it. You have never seen anything sweeter than how enchanted he is by all the sea creatures, when you get to the rock pools and you can pick up starfish and other small animals he is so gentle with them you might just marry him then and there.
I N U M A K I
Talking isn’t his strong suit, for obvious reasons. So the cinema is perfect, he buys you both HUGE buckets of popcorn and then holds your hand or has his arm wrapped around your shoulders the whole film. He is so smooth and doesn’t need a word to do it. You go for milkshakes afterwards and giggle through text and sign language if you know it about whatever film you saw.
Y U U T A
The zoo. You both just wander around cooing over the animals or laughing at the silly things they do. If you pick up a silly animal hat then he will definitely wear it because the smile you give him could convince him the sky was yellow. He has a little picnic for you both to share on one of the sweet picnic benches together - full of your favourites that he had asked around to find out.
N O B A R A
Eh? Shopping.
M A K I
A hike is something I can definitely see her enjoying as a first date, it’s easy to find things to talk about on a date - it’s active so she’s still happy and it’s something you both enjoy doing - when you need a hand jumping a small stream, she’s taking your hand to balance your jump, “Atta girl.”
N O R I T O S H I
Escape room. No question.
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zeephyre · 6 months ago
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CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 3 EP 95 SPOILERS
jesus christ these nerds are going to kill me.
before i get into my think piece abt... everything that transpired at the end of this episode, i would like to say this is one of the best c3 episodes.... one of my favourite episodes of all time. idk idk.
essek? smut? astrid? poly bells hells allegations?? i was already fucking sold dawg. i cannot goddamn believe that this four hour episode was... mostly... a shopping episode. i cant wait for the new art, regardless of the batshitery that happened that kinda throws my vibes off. i digress.
oh ashton greymoore i love you so much. i have been so worried abt them but honestly they're probably the lat person im concerned for currently. the grief was so compelling to watch and taliesin is a master of roleplaying as minus charisma but genuinely charismatic in his dorky awkward gruff and fumbling way. his rizz is actually just blindsiding us with earnest acts of service and comfort for his friends and i think thats so neat. im happy that they're all going to aeor with fcg intertwined throughout their outfits. its poetic and also maddeningly sweet.
(love the little callowmoore moments sprinkled through this episode... they're so real to me)
pumat was fun and i am so damn glad they got all the items matt offered cause they were all so fucking cool.
also??? sugar daddy dorian storm??? yeah i see you gay boy. dorym is so real guys we need to prepare for a confession and soon. idk i get the vibe liam is gonna drop it in the most heartbreaking way. or robbie. they're both sick in the head tbh.
loved the little queer inn that essek dragged them to and the calm before the storm was genuinely the cutest shit ever and im glad they were having fun despite everything. we got the essek and ashton dunamancy scene that i have been begging for but i cant even talk abt that right now.
before i address orym and laudna...
delilah briarwood. im gonna fucking kill you. best believe that.
theres been so much discourse on twitter abt who was right or wrong or this or that, but ultimately the point is: neither of them is RIGHT. they're both stricken with trauma and grief, and motivated by the love they have for a) the ones orym has lost and b) the one laudna is fighting not to lose. laudna WAS worried abt orym before delilah twisted that into paranoia, and orym didnt wield that fuckass blade bc he DOESNT feel sick touching it.
he says its not abt revenge but... god. orym. you want revenge. call it whatever you like but you've been angry for a while.
laudna says she KNEW the sword was cursed, but she was lying or in denial abt the fact that delilah is the one who coerced her to hold the blade in her hand.
if either of them had decided to talk to each other or the group as a whole then this could have -- most likely -- been avoided. orym decided to take the blade and shoulder the burden of what it meant and what it represented so they didnt have. laudna felt betrayed and hurt but instead of trusting orym she was manipulated back into that cunt's clutches.
i dont prescribe to trauma olympics, especially when laudna and orym never actually denied each others' trauma with otohan and that blade so i think its slightly irrelevant when discussing them both.
(i will say this... otohans blade is what killed laudna but delilah is the one who had her in a cage when she was dead. otohan murdered oryms family and there was absolutely nothing that could save them. i firmly believe THAT is what chetney meant, not that laudna hasnt suffered so we can all just... unclench a little idk)
in all the discourse, lets not forget who the real villains are -- evil milfs (delilah and otohan). delilah chose this moment to sew distrust in laudna towards orym for a reason. its like the spider queen and opal. she NEEDS laudna isolated and dependent, and she cant sink her teeth in completely if laudna has someone to fall back on.
imodna... jesus imodna breaks me every time. that entire scene on the roof while laudna looks so much like her abuser -- the woman who MURDERED her -- and having that visage fade as laudna proclaims her love for imogen. peak romance and tragedy.
it was still so upsetting hearing the echoes of delilah as laudna spoke tho. knowing her hold on laudna is getting stronger and laudna has no real faith that she will be able to fight against her. hearing her ask imogen if shes still fun scary and knowing that imogen cant tell the truth. this isnt fun anymore. laudna is in danger and imogen doesnt know how to fix it.
"I'll always love you, Laudna. I just don't know what to do with it."
its uh its not looking good for our sapphics fellas.
anyway, i do think that ashton was the emotional mvp of this episode, especially while shit was escalating. putting themself between orym and laudna, PROTECTING laudna despite knowing she attacked him, TRUSTING that she was actually telling the truth and guiding her to see the forest for the trees and apologize for an irrational choice made through a mixture of trauma, delusion and paranoia.
im... excited? for the next episode? not sure why we keep having really horrible inter-party conflict the day before going on a suicide mission but the hells are my problem babies and i have to accept that they're just little fucked up guys.
god. is it thursday yet??
(AND WHERE THE HELL IS SAM)
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hedgehog-moss · 2 years ago
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The autumn growing season in the greenhouse is coming to an end, so here are my plant reviews!
1. Basil: 11/10
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I’ve never had so much basil before! I planted it when it was a baby and it grew to the size of a baobab. I’ve made SO many jars of pesto, I can make pasta all winter. The basil plant started suffering from the cold around mid-November and I harvested the last leaves, but it grew amazingly as long as indoor temperatures remained above 10°C at night.
2. Bell pepper: 10.5/10
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The only reason I’m ranking it lower is because I like basil better, but I’ve had a constant supply of beautiful green peppers all throughout the autumn! The plant is very low-maintenance and bravely produced peppers in 35° greenhouse temperatures in early September and 10° temperatures in November without a complaint.
3. Green beans: 10/10
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I love fresh green beans. I planted different kinds, purple ones and green ones, and discovered with a bit of surprise that the former grow a deep purple colour and then become green when you cook them. It’s a fun plant. And they grow very well in vertical growing towers!
4. White onions: 9/10
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They didn’t thrive in my planters for some reason (they seemed to get smothered by the other plants around them) but they were very happy by themselves in the vertical tower. Will keep that in mind for next year.
5. Kohlrabi: 8/10
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Kohlrabi shouldn’t be so high in the list because I don’t like eating it all that much, but it grows so enthusiastically and then it looks like little green aliens going \o/ in their towers, it’s just a very endearing plant.
6. Lettuce: 7/10
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The lettuces (I’m making this word countable) in the towers grew amazingly in September thanks to having their feet constantly soaking in water, while their sisters in the planters were suffering from the heat. But as soon as the weather grew colder and more humid all the tower lettuces became covered with mildew :( Meanwhile the planter lettuces were having their 15 minutes of fame (see second picture)—until the weather got even wetter in November and they finally succumbed to mildew as well. So I’ll note that tower lettuce is good for summer and planter lettuce for early autumn, and then the greenhouse gets too humid for healthy lettuce.
6. Parsley: 5/10
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Parsley is in the shame corner. It grew very very well in its tower—so well that its roots started colonising the little pipe that brings water, so the pipe became clogged and water stopped circulating in the tower and the parsley died. That is the definition of shooting yourself in the foot, parsley, you short-sighted plant. You wanted instant water gratification and ended up with nothing. There’s a lesson to be learnt here. (The lesson is to put parsley at the bottom of the tower rather than at the top where the pipe is.)
7. Miscellanies: my aubergine plant produced stakhanovically in September and then shrivelled up and died as soon as October (and cold nights) started. Definitely a summer-only plant (at least in a non-heated greenhouse). Fennel grew incredibly well, both in the planters and in the towers, but I discovered (I’d never tried it before) that it tastes exactly like anise and I hate anise. I tried cooking it in a gratin as I figured cheese makes everything okay, but not even cheese could make fennel tolerable to me. No more fennel. Arugula (<- the superior word. Boycott rocket) grew well but had trouble asserting itself next to my giant basil plant. I’ll try to give it more space to grow next time, poor arugula got so squished.
And finally:
8. Fish (not rated for reasons explained below, but it’s hard to imagine what a fish could do wrong)
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The point of the vertical growing towers is to try aquaponic gardening—they are connected via pipes and a pump to a water tank in which I would like to raise fish. The idea of aquaponics is that the fish and the plants have a symbiotic relationship, with the fish’s waste fertilising the water for the plants, and the plants’ roots cleaning the water for the fish as they absorb these nutrients. It’s recommended to start with goldfish for the first year as they are quite sturdy, then once you know how your greenhouse behaves in every season, the water temperature changes etc, you can try other kinds (including edible fish).
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^ So I had four little pioneers in an aquarium in my kitchen waiting to move to the greenhouse—but I needed to stabilise the pH of the water (among other things) before bringing in the fish, and that proved very difficult! My pH had daily fluctuations that I tried to tame by adding potassium bicarbonate or varying the % of rainwater vs. spring water in the tank, and nothing worked. I thought it was because I had put so many plants in the towers, but as I started removing the summer plants and the pH didn’t improve, I finally tried putting my pH sensor in a bucket of distilled water to see if it worked... and it turned out that the sensor was malfunctioning. I bought a new sensor, who immediately told me that my pH was perfectly adequate. I felt daft.
Anyway, my brave pioneer fish were moved to the greenhouse last week and they seem to be enjoying their new tank (they’ve got lots of plant roots dipping in the water to nibble on or hide behind), so I’ve ordered the rest of the goldfish gang! My greenhouse will become a lot more populated tomorrow, stay tuned :)
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gamergirl-niffler · 1 year ago
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Cześć myszka! To ja, Paulinex. Czytałam te twoje headcanony dla Genshina i powiem, że mi się spodobały bardzo! Takie pocieszne! Ty, a robisz też inne fandomy? Bo wiem, że lubisz też akademię bohaterów. To słuchaj, sprawę mam, jakby dało radę uprosić się o takie mini mini headcanony dla All Mighta, Endeavoura, Aizawy, Dabiego, Izuku i Twice'a - ich ukochana w tajemnicy adoptuje kociaka! Z góry dzięki! ❤️❤️
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Adopting kitten is secret! That's such a cute idea!
Hope you like it!
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All Might
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- He is surprised.
- Toshinori went to get some shopping to make the dinner that the two of you could enjoy, and he returned to a little fluff ball jumping around the living room, trying to catch a little bell while still rolling it around.
- Are you home? Did he forget to close the window and the kitten sneaked it?
- "Y/N? You home?" He asked a little louder, still not sure what happened.
- "Toshinori!" You came into the living room and greeted him with a tight hug, which he gladly returned.
- "Would you mind telling me what's that? Of course, I know it's a cat, but what are they doing here?" He asked, holding you close.
- You just gave him an innocent smile. "Well, I adopted a kitten. Surprise!” 
- To your own surprise, he wasn’t angry. In fact, he was very opposite to angry.
- Pretty soon, the kitten got more attached to him.
- As soon as Toshinori was up, the little kitten was up as well, happily trotting behind its beloved human
- This actually made you a little jealous.
- Little cat always lurked around, ready to attack and play with him.
- When it comes to you, the kitten only wanted to play when Toshinori wasn’t around.
- You were basically a replacement for the best human.
- In the end, even if you adopted the kitten in secret and as a surprise, it was a good move.
- The kitten brought Toshinori a lot of comfort when you weren’t around. He never felt alone in the flat.
- You called the kitten "Small Might" just to mess with your boyfriend a little but with all honesty? With the way the kitten got attached to him? It was a very suiting name. 
--------
Izuku
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 - He was gone for two weeks, and he came back to see your shared apartment filled with cat stuff. What even was that?!
- You came out of your room and squealed happily, seeing him back home.
- For a moment, he forgot about the odd stuff until he noticed a little head curiously sticking out from your hood. Big eyes just looking at him.
- He looked at the kitten, and the kitten looked right back at him.
- "Where did you get the kitten? You didn't tell me," Izuku said, sounding almost hurt.
- You pulled away and took the kitten out of the hood to present it to your boyfriend. "Well, say hi to Kyo," you introduced, and kitty meowed proudly. "I took him from the street... I just found him on my way home."
- Izuku smiled and gently patted the kitten's head. Maybe you weren't a hero but you saved a little life. He couldn’t be mad. "Welcome at your new home."
- Both kitten and Izuku got attached to each other pretty quickly, of course not excluding you.
- Kyo was always happy to see you both.
- When Izuku was too busy to play, the kitten was going to play with you. Reverse happened when you were busy.
- The best moments in the kitten's life were the ones where both of you paid attention to him.
- This kitten was spoiled with all the love he deserved.
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Aizawa
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- Last thing he expected of you was to see you up when he got home from night patrol. It was the middle of the night, and you were all bouncy and happy waiting for him in the kitchen of your shared apartment. "Why are you up, kitten?" 
- "I just wanted to see you, I missed you and I have a surprise for you," You explained, getting even more excited.
- Shota sighed, feeling tired. He just wanted to go to bed and snuggle with you before he needed to get up to deal with unruly young heroes.
- You walked away and soon returned with a little kitten in your arms. Little fluff ball meowed and looked at him.
- He blinked, looking at the kitten and then at you. "You got us a kitten? In secret? Y/N..." 
- "I know, I know! But we talked about this, yeah? We talked but never did anything on that decision, so I decided to 'go behind your back' let's say," you explained with a sweet smile.
- Suddenly, there was a quiet meow that definitely didn't come from the kitten in your arms.
- Shota let out another sigh and removed his Capturing Weapon to get better access to the upper part of his costume. 
- You blinked, confused and then gasped, seeing him pull out a ginger kitten. Kitten meowed while the other meowed happily to see a playmate.
- "I found him during the patrol. It's raining, so I couldn't leave him all alone," he explained, scratching kitten's head.
- Two kittens were better than one! 
- Of course, they both were more into Shota. He was a cat magnet, but you didn’t mind it, seeing how much happiness they brought him.
- Seeing Shota working on students' papers with kittens napping on his lap or right on the table was a different kind of cozy.
- Kittens effectively filled up his days, making them much more bearable.
------
Dabi
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- You tried to sneak past him once you got home, which turned out to be a big fail.
- "Trying to sneak past me, huh? I thought you can do better than that," Dabi muttered, wrapping arms around you. You were pulled closer to his body. "Did you get tired of me, princess?"
- You immediately shook your head. "No! Of course not, Touya. I just... I wanted to get to the bathroom," giggling, you shrugged.
- Touya was about something, but a quiet meow interrupted him.
- You went red and tried to escape his grasp, but he didn't let you. Without even asking, Touya reached under your jacket and pulled out a kitten. ”What the hell?"
- After giving him an apologetic smile, you scratched the back of your neck. "I just adopted the kitten... Surprise, I guess?"
- "Just keep that fur ball away from me," he said, giving the kitten back to you.
- Despite his clear dislike of a little creature, the kitten kept trotting back to him. Especially when it got cold.
- One time you caught Dabi petting and playing with the kitten, which was adorable.
- When Touya was napping on the couch, little cat often jumped on his chest or snuggled in the crock of his neck
- Overall, he was on good terms with 'little rat' as he liked to call the cat.
- He loved this kitten, but would NEVER admit it.
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Enji Todoroki
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- He was furious! 
- You dared to bring a cat home that wasn't even yours?! 
- "Y/N! Come here!"
- Of course you came over as soon as he called you in, and you could see how mad he was. "Care to explain?" He asked, pointing at the kitten.
- "Well, it's a kitten," you gladly explained, playing dumb.
- Enji wasn't in the mood for playing your stupid game. "I will put it as simple as possible. You get it out of the house, or I'll kick it out myself."
- You blinked, looking at him, from his face you could tell he wasn't joking. "B-But Enji. I can't just give it back... I always wanted a kitten and I thought it would be nice to have some furry..." You tried your best to explain it to him.
 - "You think I care? You went behind my back, without even asking me for permission to get a cat!"
- You winced at his raised voice. "B-But it's just a harmless kitten. I'll train it so it won't scratch anything or pee anywhere... Please, let me keep it."
- "I said no. Get rid of it, or I will, and I can't promise it will end up in good hands. You have a week," with those words he walked away. You just picked up a kitten and sighed. "Let's find you a good home, little one."
- For next week, you were looking for someone who could adopt the kitten and gave it a good home.
- Enji didn’t pay any attention to the little animal. Even when the kitten came closer to get warm, he just pushed it away.
- You even tried to maybe talk him into the idea, but it just ended in yet another fight.
- After a week, the kitten was gone, in a new, good home. You still felt bad because of it.
- Todoroki just patted your head. "Don't you ever go behind my back again." 
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Twice
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- "Jin! Jin, come here. I got something to show you," You waved at your beloved with a smile.
- He was immediately right next to you. "What? What is it? C'mon! C'mon, show me what it is, starlight," Jin was basically bouncing from excitement.
- You kissed his cheek and then opened your jacket to reveal the head of a cute kitten. It meowed loudly, looking at both of you.
- "Kitten?! You got us a kitten? You never said you want one... OH, IT'S SO CUTE!," he said, scratching the kitten on the chin.
- "Forgive me. I did that in secret to surprise you, so ta-da!," you giggled and pulled the kitty out so he could hold it.
- "I forgive you, but I am also mad you didn't tell your boyfriend," Twice nodded, busy patting the kitten. "It's so amazingly fluffy, I love it, but it will leave a flat messy with fur." 
- Kitten became "Twice Jr." and was the center of Jin's attention.
- Junior was your REAL 'fur baby'
- He was showing it to everyone! Shigaraki and Dabi were not impressed: it was just a cat. Hawks said it was cute, but Toga loved the kitten as much as you and Jin did. They both dressed kitten up in cute and funny outfits.
- Kitten seemed to have a calming effect on him. 
- When the identity crisis came, you together with kitten were there to calm Twice down. 
- Junior became Jin's best companion, of course kitten wasn’t replacing you, but it's just as important as you. 
- Even if you did this in secret, he was really happy you brought this little, additional ray of sunshine into his sad life.
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cheonsarchive · 1 year ago
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Sunghoon | Unspoken
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Pairing: Sunghoon x Fem!Reader
Genre: College!AU, Best Friends to Lovers!AU, Angst, Fluff, Suggestive
Featuring: the rest of ENHYPEN, LE SSERAFIM, TXT, aespa
Warnings: Cursing, suggestive content, mentions of/implied sex (no explicit smut), reader is COMPLICATED (I'm sorry lmao), mentions of death
Summary: You expected your summer break to be all relaxed and cozy, that was until your best friend decided to confess to you out of the blue. Cue a chaotic summer full of complicated feelings, denial, miscommunication and even more pining for each other than before. Bonus: Jake giving decent advice for once!
Word Count: 18k (what)
Playlist: Ruelle - War of Hearts, Nick Jonas ft. Tove Lo - Close, Lana Del Rey - Born To Die, Lostboycrow - Powers, Chase Atlantic - Meddle About, Aquilo - Losing You, Harry Styles - Falling
Author's Note: I rose from the dead to bring you a long awaited Sunghoon oneshot! I'm not too happy with it actually, but I'm a perfectionist when it comes to Sunghoon and I feel like I can't reach his standard anyway, so whatever lol. The first confession scene was inspired by Little Women (recommendation!), because it was perfect and needed to be reproduced in an ENHYPEN context. I would appreciate any kind of feedback. ❤️
If you want to be tagged in future ENHYPEN scenarios, let me know!
Masterlist
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The ring of the bell that announced the end of the lesson made you slump in your seat in relief. You never anticipated the familiar buzzing noise more than today, the last class before the summer break being over making a wave of excitement rush through your body.
This semester had been absolute hell and you couldn’t wait for the break to start to be able to live with an empty head, at least for a couple of weeks, before you had to start studying again. You managed to hand in your last paper the day before, so you could officially call it a day once your last class was over and leave campus as fast as possible. Your friend Yunjin wasn’t as lucky, though.
“I’m so jealous of you, I really need to work on my time management.” Yunjin huffs in disappointment, still having to hand in two papers before she can start her summer break. You smiled apologetically at her.
“No need to be though, you’ll go to Italy soon and have the greatest time sipping Aperol Spritz in the sun while I will rot here without you,” you pointed out.
“Don’t say that, you will probably chill at Sunghoon’s pool every day anyway. Plus, we’re gonna have the road trip coming up at the end of the break, remember? That’s gonna be so much fun!” she chimed.
Ah yes, the road trip. Your friend group has decided to go to the countryside for a few days at the end of each summer break to detox once more from the city (and university) life before the next semester starts. It was Yunjin’s idea and ever since it was planned she kept talking about it nonstop.
“We’ll see about Sunghoon’s pool. If Yeji is being annoying again, we might have to move somewhere else. Sunghoon has been complaining about how she has recently become really obsessed with this one boy at school and wants to throw a pool party to invite him,” you laughed, reminiscing the phone call you had with Sunghoon the other day where he kept complaining for an hour straight how annoying it is to have a younger sibling going through puberty. When you had told him that he was like that as well once, he firmly denied it, being his usual stubborn self.
“She’s growing so fast! I wonder how protective Sunghoon will be once she actually starts dating.” Yunjin wiggles her eyebrows at you. You let out a dry chuckle in response, imagination running wild about how whiny he would be, pretending to be cold and scary when he was actually a soft, loving brother to Yeji.
“He will be the absolute worst.” You shook your head in amusement. You knew Sunghoon like the back of your hand, so you knew that he would absolutely freak out if a boy dared to hurt his little sister. It was probably a natural response, one you wouldn’t know as you don’t have any siblings, but he was exaggerating a bit. Sometimes you wondered if he just wanted to fit into the overprotective big brother trope.
“Hello ladies! What are we talking about?” Heeseung greeted after suddenly walking next to you. You smiled back at him and could see a familiar relief in his eyes, one that was probably coating all of your faces. Next semester would be Heeseung’s last one in college, so the pressure was on.
“Just how Sunghoon is going be the worst big brother once his sister starts dating.” Yunjin shrugged and Heeseung broke out in a chuckle because he definitely agrees. You almost felt bad for shading Sunghoon like that, but you enjoyed teasing him about it.
“Do I even want to know how this topic came up? There is more than enough time to shit-talk Sunghoon later, we should be discussing how excited we are for the summer break instead!” Heeseung jumped up and down and you realized just how giddy he was because he rarely acts this hyper.
“We were! It’s not that exciting for me though, because I’m not going to travel like you two,” you defended, making both of them exchange glances and scoff in unison.
“Please, you wouldn’t survive without Sunghoon anyway. It’s not like you don’t enjoy spending every day with him during summer break.” Yunjin laughed and you glared it her.
It was true, though. Sunghoon and you were inseparable like pen and paper ever since you were in middle school. You spent the majority of time at each other’s homes, to the point where you wondered which place you should actually call your home, his or your own? But during exam season, you usually spend less time with each other because you’re too busy studying. So it has become your ritual to spend the beginning of summer break together to make up for the lost time. It was easy too because that was usually the time everyone else travelled anyway.
The fact that you never grew tired of each other really amazed everyone around you. Rumors started spreading quickly that you might be secretly dating, or at least crushing on each other. You’ve always confidently turned down such rumors, but especially Heeseung and Yunjin persisted that something was going on between you two and loved teasing you about it.
“If it’s about what I think it is, I don’t want to hear it.” You warned, seeing the suggestive look in their eyes. You grew tired of always having to defend your friendship with Sunghoon. Maybe because deep down, there was some truth to it.
Sunghoon and you fit each other like a glove. You always knew what the other one thinks without having to articulate it, you can talk about everything without feeling judged and you balance each other out with your skills and knowledge.
It already started in middle school. Sunghoon was more skilled in creative subjects whereas you were good in trickier ones like mathematics or chemistry. You started tutoring each other quickly, which helped both of you get through high school. He helped you with your art projects whereas you explained his math homework to him.
Sunghoon was there during many difficult times as well. He was there when you experienced your first heartbreak, and he comforted you when your grandpa died who you cherished so deeply. Even years later, when you confessed that you’re still struggling with his death, Sunghoon was quick to drop everything and come over to you to help you get through it.
And if that wasn’t enough, Sunghoon also grew incredibly handsome as time passed. Puberty really turned him into the best version of himself and it was no wonder many girls at university swooned over him. So really, wasn’t he perfect boyfriend material?
“No.” You turned to Yunjin with a surprised face, confusion written over your features. “You finally need to confront your feelings. Even a blind person can see that the connection you have is more than just friendship.”
You rolled your eyes. There was nothing to confront in your opinion, which made you really question why they couldn’t just drop the topic. Though you sometimes wondered if the longing gaze from Sunghoon held more than you thought.
“Yeah whatever. Call me when you’ve handed in your papers!” You announced your departure, hugging Yunjin extra tight since you probably won’t see her again before her trip overseas. You promised to keep in touch before you separated from your friends to get on the bus to Sunghoon’s house. He didn’t have classes today, so he slept in and waited at home, promising you to celebrate the beginning of summer break with fresh watermelon.
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“Lord have mercy.” You said with eyes as big as the watermelon in front of you. Sunghoon smiled cheekily, proudly presenting his purchase from the market. He posed like a model, and you slapped his arm playfully.
“That must have cost you a fortune.” You said feeling guilty, head dropping slightly. Sunghoon let out a tut at that.
“Don’t worry about it. Celebrating summer break is definitely worth it and much needed. I have to distract myself from wanting to curse at Professor Yoon.” Sunghoon exclaimed, the last part making you giggle quietly.
He expertly cut the watermelon in triangles and handed you a piece before sitting down opposite from you on the terrace. The sun had been cooking you and you wondered whether you will really survive a day at the pool. You really enjoyed spending time at Sunghoon’s house because of his big pool, but it stops being enjoyable once the temperatures hit a certain degree mark. The watermelon was not just needed as a way of celebrating, but also as a refreshment.
Once you took the first bite, you sighed in satisfaction, making Sunghoon suppress a laugh. You looked at him with a grim expression and cheeks stuffed like a squirrel.
“What?”
“Nothing, sounds like you really needed that one too. And you look cute with your mouth full.” He said, mimicking how your cheeks must have looked to him.
Yunjin and Heeseung might have classified that as flirting, but you knew Sunghoon was just bickering with you. He dropped comments like that from time to time, knowing you would always react with an annoyed expression.
“So, how is Yeji’s dating life going?” you taunted, trying to change the topic as you remembered the conversation you had with Yunjin and Heeseung earlier. Sunghoon’s smile dropped instantly and he groaned in annoyance.
“Don’t remind me. I told her to stay away from that prick but she is persistent.” He elaborated despite not wanting to have this conversation.
“You don’t even know him and call him a prick!” you laughed at your best friend being unreasonable, almost choking on your watermelon slice in the process. Sunghoon fixed you with a glare.
“I don’t have to know him to know he’s an idiot.” He defended but you could only raise a brow at him in response.
“Okay, you boy expert. You must know better.” You fake-praised but he brushed you off, taking another bite from his watermelon slice.
“I just want the best for my sister.” He said matter-of-factly, words almost unintelligible due to him chewing on his watermelon.
“I know, but you need to relax a little bit. Let her experience her first heartbreak if necessary and focus on your own miserable love life instead.” You joked, but Sunghoon grew tense upon hearing the second half of your sentence. He looked at you through his lashes, the way you acted completely unbothered by what you had just said irking him.
Once you finished eating you decided it would be too hot to stay outside, so you went to Sunghoon’s room to kill time. You plopped onto his bed while he was sorting some laundry, talking about everything and nothing. Unbeknownst to you, Sunghoon seemed stiff since earlier. You couldn’t pinpoint it, but you knew something was up with him today. It was like he was contemplating something.
For some reason, the topic of dating wouldn’t escape you today. Some time into the conversation, you drifted off to Yunjin’s boy escapades, laughing at the ridiculous stories she had told you.
You remembered Yunjin hooking up with that one guy from calculus, you guessed his name was Soobin, almost losing her virginity in a broom closet if it wasn’t for the janitor to catch them. She dropped him the moment she saw him drag another girl in said broom closet, able to imagine what was probably going on in there since she had first-hand experience. She never disclosed whether the janitor caught those two as well and you were oddly curious.
She started swiping on Tinder afterwards, meeting up with a guy whose name slipped from your memory, but you certainly remember the chaos that unfolded once she found out he was actually cheating on his girlfriend with her. For some reason, she was gravitating towards weird boys and she blamed it on them being Korean after a while.
So came Yunjin’s trip to Italy. It was honestly no surprise when she announced that she wants to start her “hot girl summer” experience with it. She started complaining about the lack of good-natured men around your campus and how she wants to try dating someone European. You started to question the intentions of her trip. Was it to relax and enjoy the Italian scenery, or was it to enjoy the Italian ‘scenery’?
“Maybe we should start our own hot girl and hot boy summer instead of being glued together all the time,” you fantasized absentmindedly, just the thought of it making you chuckle. You really weren’t the person to hit up strangers, and neither was he. Sunghoon tensed at your words, stopping in his tracks. His back was turned to you, but you could tell what you said stirred something in him. You patiently waited for his response, and he bit his lip, contemplating what to say.
“No, I don’t think that would be good.” he said quietly, but loud enough for you to hear. His breathing halted the moment you suggested getting to know other people.
“Why is that? I think you need to let go of the mysterious handsome guy image and finally get laid again.” you laughed, slightly confused by his changing demeanor.
“I don’t want to hook up with random girls.” He stated. At first, you didn’t think much of it. Sunghoon never seemed that interested in dating. He did have a short fling with a girl named Eunchae when he entered college, but it ended with a lot of tears and refusal to meet someone new. He tried to hook up here and there, but that stopped after a while too and you figured he might want to wait for a real girlfriend, not just some one-night stands with strangers.
It didn’t strike you how serious he was being about this. So, when he turned around to look at you, the atmosphere in the room shifted. His gaze held something you had never seen before. His gaze held so much, in fact, that it made you nervous. And like many times before, Sunghoon didn’t need to speak up for you to know what he meant. But unlike many times before, what he was thinking made your blood run cold.
“No.” you immediately blurted, eyes going wide in shock.
“Y/N, listen.” He rushed out once you started to get up from the bed.
“No, no. Sunghoon, please don’t.” you tried to shield from him, hoping it was all a misunderstanding. But things like misunderstandings weren’t in your code.
“Y/N it’s no use. We finally need to talk about this.”
“I think I’m going to be sick, I better go home,” you said, feeling the sudden urge to flee from the situation. You almost sprinted to the door and Sunghoon tried to block you from leaving his room, but you pushed him away in panic. As stubborn as he is, Sunghoon followed you suit, and you were glad that you two were alone at his house right now, because you wouldn’t want Yeji or his parents to overhear this conversation.
“Y/N please listen to me. I’ve started liking you a while ago already and I never said anything because I thought it wasn’t mutual. But sometimes I-… I just-… I got the feeling that we might have a chance as something more than friends. T-that you might want this too. I’ve waited so long for you to make a move and prove that I wasn’t imagining things and that you feel the same way for me. But it never happened, and I just can’t go on like this. I need you to know, okay?”
Sunghoon rambled so fast you almost couldn’t catch up with him, he blurted all that while you tried to get out of his house as quickly as possible. He kept going while you practically ran down the stairs, picking up your shoes and sliding into them. Before you turned the door knob of his front door, you turned around to look at him again. And it was a big mistake.
Sunghoon was wearing the most desperate expression you had ever witnessed. The fact that he just confessed to you made your stomach turn. You even noticed how his eyes turned glassy, was he crying? Disbelief was written over your face and all you could do was shake your head and say “No.” once more.
Something broke inside of Sunghoon when he became conscious of the fact that you were rejecting him at this moment. He mustered up the courage to tell you how he felt because everyone he had confined in told him you like him too and that he should finally tell you how he really feels. So, not only did he feel crushed by your rejection, but also by the backstab of his friends.
“Y/N I always thought we worked so well together, so I never understood why we couldn’t be more. Am I… Am I not good enough? I-is that the problem? If there is something I can change, let me know and I’ll-“
“Oh my God, Sunghoon, no. You’re literally perfect. I’m so grateful to have you by my side and I couldn’t be more thankful for all the times you comforted me and helped me to get out of trouble. You are honest and funny and- and you are committed, and I love you. But just not the way you want me to. I am sorry.” You interrupted him, feeling your eyes sting with tears, mirroring his. Sunghoon choked at your words. You realized at that moment that you haven’t seen him cry in ages. And to be the reason he was crying made you feel terrible.
“Please tell me why. I don’t understand.” He begged, sounding absolutely miserable while a tear managed to escape and run down his cheek slowly.
“I don’t know Sunghoon. I just don’t. We can’t ruin our friendship like this-”
“Who said this is ruining our friendship? Maybe we weren’t meant to be just friends in the first place!”
“Yes we were!” you snapped back at him, anger starting to bubble up inside of you, “Yes we were,” you repeated, more calmly this time, “don’t make this something it isn’t. Please.”
This was the moment you decided that you had to get out of there immediately. You couldn’t take the pressure anymore, the fact that he expected an answer from you. You were overwhelmed with the whole situation and couldn’t think straight, so your adrenaline rush decided for flight instead of fight. You quickly turned the door knob and rushed out of his home, leaving him behind.
“Y/N, wait!” was his last attempt to keep you by his side, but he was met with a door being slammed in his face instead. He stared at his front door in disbelief, trying to process what had just unfolded. How he ruined everything. Sunghoon wanted to hit himself for speaking up, he figured that he should have just stayed quiet instead. But it was eating at him how he was silently pining for you and you never reacted the way he wanted you to. It confused him how you always scoffed at him whenever he complimented you but enjoyed cuddling with him during your regular movie nights.
He always wondered if he was making everything up, if you weren’t giving him potential signs at all and he just interpreted them the wrong way. Yet, when he opened up to Jake about his crush for you Jake didn’t seem surprised and said that everyone knew you both liked each other. Emphasis on both. After some time passed, Jake reassured Sunghoon that it was no use pining like this and that he was sure you two were destined to be together. Sunghoon was still scared shitless because there was still the possibility of you rejecting him. And whatever happens, he can’t afford to lose you because of his stupid feelings.
Sunghoon can’t even remember when he started liking you. It randomly hit him one day when you were wiping some ketchup off his mouth after eating fries and his heart began to race uncontrollably. He started noticing how pretty your eyes and lips were, how well you carried yourself, how quick-witted you were and how you always seemed to be at ease when you were around him. He had an ability to calm you down that no one else had. And Sunghoon managed to mistake it for mutual interest.
Once you slammed the door in his face you stood in front of his house for a few minutes, trying to sort out your thoughts and get your feet to move. The gears in your head were turning at lightning speed and you couldn’t believe what had just happened. Wasn’t this what you always wanted?
You speculated if there was something more than friendship forming between you two from time to time. You started paying closer attention to Sunghoon’s small habits and the way he acts around you, appreciating the way he always puts your needs first and makes sure you’re always sorted first before he worries about himself. When your friends started asking about what you and Sunghoon were, you were quick to answer that you were just best friends, but you always questioned why they would ask that if you simply gave off friendship energy.
Sunghoon had everything you would look for in a partner. So why were you rejecting him? You never even calculated the possibility of him liking you back, and the sole idea of it made heat rush to your ears. For whatever reason it seemed so impossible to you that Sunghoon could hold similar feelings for you that you blatantly rejected any chance of you two getting into a relationship, pushing your feelings aside in the process. It annoyed you that your friends kept pushing you towards each other when it was clear as day to you that Sunghoon didn’t feel the same. For your own sanity, you couldn’t accept anything else.
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It's been over two weeks since Sunghoon confessed to you. And ever since then, you two didn’t talk to each other at all. It was the longest time you went without texting, calling and seeing each other. And you hated every bit of it. You missed Sunghoon like crazy, not talking to him felt like torture.
“You wouldn’t survive without Sunghoon.“
You hated how your friend was right. But you couldn’t bring yourself to text or call him, let alone appear at his house. He was probably hoping for you to reach out because he didn’t contact you either. To be fair, it was your turn after you ran away from him like that. But to put it simply, you had no clue how to address this situation.
You had spent the last couple of days rereading your text messages, smiling at all the fond memories you made and the stupid memes you constantly shared with each other. It made your heart ache for him even more and you started being angry at him for ruining a perfectly fine friendship. Things should have just stayed the way they were and the fact that everything was different now bothered you to no end.
Apart from missing Sunghoon, you also felt incredibly bored. With Yunjin and Heeseung being out of the country, your closest friends were all unavailable and all you did was lay in bed all day and reminiscence old times. You wondered how this shift in Sunghoon and your relationship would affect the whole friend group dynamic. Did you just doom more than one friendship?
Your boredom got to the point where you considered texting friends you rarely hang out with out of pure desperation. However, you didn’t manage to send out the text messages you had written and rewritten several times. You felt like you sounded too eager and decided to just continue decaying in your room, hoping that Sunghoon will find the courage to reach out to you first.
When you felt your phone vibrate next to you, you have never been so fast to check who messaged you, obviously hoping that your and Sunghoon’s telepathy had worked once again and he was the one to reach out. When you were met with a notification from Ningning, you were slightly disappointed, to say the least. Nevertheless, you opened her message.
Ningning~: Hey Y/N! I haven’t heard from you in a while so I wanted to reach out again. How is your summer break? Are you in town? I wanted to ask if you would like to join me tomorrow. There’s a party hosted by Yeonjun and I thought maybe you’d like to come too! Just let me know xx
You sighed. You really weren’t in the mood to party. But you were also dying of boredom, so should you just ignore the offer you got at being less lonely and having some fun? Maybe it can distract you from this whole Sunghoon situation. Alcohol was always a good way to drown your feelings, right? Wrong, but who cares.
You: Hey Ning, thanks for reaching out! I’d love to go! Just text me the details and I’ll be there x
You cringed. It didn’t sound like you at all. You hoped she wouldn’t notice and ask what’s wrong because you only wanted to talk to Yunjin about this at the moment. You considered calling her, but she already announced on the first day of her trip that the internet is really bad and she probably won’t be able to call or text much. Great.
To your surprise, Ningning didn’t notice your strange demeanor, texted you all the important information and before you knew it, you were standing in front of Choi Yeonjun’s apartment. You took the chance to actually style yourself for once, usually being too lazy to put in any effort to look good during the summer break. It did give you a boost of confidence, but you still weren’t sure if the party was a good idea.
And you realized it definitely wasn’t a good idea when you entered the apartment and the first thing you saw was Park Sunghoon standing at the other end of the hallway talking to a friend. As if he had a radar for you, he immediately locked eyes with you from across the hallway. You couldn’t read his expression but noticed how you stared at each other for a solid five seconds. Your skin burned under his gaze and you couldn’t hold eye contact any longer, quickly disappearing from his sight into another room. Ningning was quick to organize drinks for you and she did an amazing job at chatting you up, making you forget about your unplanned encounter with Sunghoon.
Of course, Sunghoon was at the party. What did you expect? He’s close with Yeonjun, and the fact that you couldn’t put two and two together before going to the party baffled you. But it was too late to run away now, and you decided to just try and ignore Sunghoon as much as possible. To your surprise, you really didn’t catch a glimpse of him for the rest of the evening. In fact, everything started to blur once Karina joined you and Ningning with a round of shots. Afterwards, you continued downing shots like no tomorrow and before you knew it, you were seriously drunk.
You did know your limit and you stopped once you noticed how close you were to feeling sick, but that didn’t change the fact that you developed some mobility problems. You decided to sit down in the living room, but the moment your body met the sofa you started dissociating. With no idea how much time had passed since you plopped yourself on Yeonjun’s sofa, you were only pulled out of your trance when you were met with four pairs of eyes in front of you. Your vision was blurry and when you tried your best to make out who it was, you regretted it.
“Y/N, are you okay?” Sunghoon asked, a worried expression painting his face. Ningning was next to him, she probably called him over because she didn’t know what to do. You blinked at him several times before you carefully picked your words, trying not to sound too drunk.
“Yeah, I’m great!” you yelled over the music with a smile, so loud that the people around you took notice of your state as well. Sunghoon sighed, he really wasn’t in the best state either, but he immediately sobered up a bit once Ningning asked for his help to get you home.
“Let me take you home, okay? Come on.” He reached out his hand for you and you had to focus really hard to be able to take it. Once you stood up you started swaying, noticing again just how much alcohol was in your system. Sunghoon detected your difficulty to simply stand straight as well, holding your lower arm to keep you from tipping over. He gently guided you to the door, mumbling something about how walking might be better for you to sober up.
The moment you went outside you took notice of the brisk air. It cooled down a lot and you were surprised how much it smelled like rain without actually having rained. You took a deep breath which helped you follow Sunghoon who kept a close eye on you. Whenever you were dangerously close to tripping, he would hold your arm to steady you and you quietly thanked him every time.
It was a long walk, and you didn’t exchange a word. However, it seemed to be a comfortable silence. You could feel tension between you two, but you knew that you weren’t in the right mind to discuss the depths of your relationship now. Yet, you wanted to test the water and whether there was bad blood between you two.
You decided to purposefully bump into him and when he looked at you in confusion, you just smiled playfully at him. It didn’t take him 2 seconds to reciprocate your smile and bump into you as a form of revenge. To his surprise, you still lost your balance faster than expected and almost landed face first on the ground. Sunghoon was quick to catch you and couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Oh God, sorry!” he let out a breathy laugh and you couldn’t help but laugh with him, shaking your head to signal him it’s okay.
With a more lighthearted atmosphere you continued your descent to your home. It didn’t take you long to feel the cold air biting at your skin and with goosebumps grazing your body you confessed to Sunghoon that you felt cold. Unfortunately, Sunghoon didn’t bring a jacket with him either. Because his house was closer to Yeonjun’s apartment than yours, he offered to take you in for the night. Considering the tension between you, you were caught off guard by his offer, but accepted it nevertheless.
Once you made it to his house you rushed inside quickly. Sunghoon was home alone for the week because his parents and sister went to a holiday camp Sunghoon didn’t bother to join. You instantly felt home and realized how much you missed not only being by his side but also at his house.
“Is it okay if I shower?” you said, slightly sobered up but still a bit wobbly on your legs.
“Promise me you won’t drown?” Sunghoon asked sarcastically, there was a seriousness in his glance that told you he was only half-joking. You nodded in response and rushed to the bathroom.
When you got out of the shower you felt really hot suddenly, so Sunghoon offered to sit on the balcony for a bit. You sat down right at the edge, letting your feet dangle over it. Sunghoon joined you, not sparing you a glance but rather focusing on the clear sky above you.
You didn’t speak for a while, and you questioned whether it was a comfortable silence or not. You gulped nervously before you scraped together all the courage you had left.
“I’m sorry that I stormed out of your house the other day.”
You hoped your words didn’t sound too slurred and Sunghoon would understand it as a sincere apology and when you glanced at him you noticed how he smiled slightly, still not looking at you.
“It’s okay.”
A small smile crept up on your lips as you kept your eyes on him, examining his features. You never noticed until now just how pretty his moles are, they are a perfect addition to his face. You didn’t know if it was the alcohol in your system, but you were suddenly craving to be near him.
Even though there were unspoken words between you, you decided to shuffle closer to him and lay your head on his shoulder. He jumped slightly for a second, not expecting the sudden affection, but he relaxed under you quickly, keeping his eyes on the sky. You didn’t know how much his heart was racing, but yours was uncontrollably beating out of your chest as well. You never felt this nervous around him before and you blamed it on the alcohol and the overall tension. Your heart was beating so fast because you were scared to lose him, right?
After a while, you noticed him shifting beneath you, turning his head towards you. You did the same and only noticed then just how close your faces were to each other’s. You could feel his breath on your face and figured that it would only take a few millimeters to close the distance between you two. Suddenly you were hyper aware of his every move, noticing how his eyes flickered between your own and your lips. You ended up doing the same, taking notice of the way his lips slightly parted, letting out a nervous huff.
The tension between you felt insufferable and you didn’t know where the sudden urge to kiss him came from. Sunghoon was slowly closing the distance between you two, giving you enough time to pull away. When he noticed that you weren’t going to, he finally captured his lips with yours. The kiss was slow and cautious, as if he was afraid you would still change your mind. His soft lips grazed yours and you needed more, becoming intoxicated by his scent. When your hand went up to his neck, he took that as a sign to deepen the kiss.
You don’t know how long you’ve kissed, but you only separated to gasp for air quickly before connecting your lips once again. You never felt a bliss like this before and started exploring his mouth as if you’d have to remember it because he could disappear from your grasp at any moment. Soon enough, your hands were all over each other and you figured that the balcony wasn’t comfortable, so you moved to Sunghoon’s bed to continue your makeout session.
You situated yourself on his lap and his hands wandered to your hips straight away, keeping you in place. You felt like you weren’t close enough, so you moved forwards, brushing your clothed core against his, eliciting a small gasp from him. When you noticed how a bulge was forming underneath you, you moved again, feeling Sunghoon’s hands on your hips tightening and guiding you on his crotch. The room filled with heavy breathing and before you knew it, you were dry humping him, feeling his erection grow beneath you.
Sunghoon quickly decided to attack your jaw and kiss down your neck, moving on to your shoulder while pushing the strap of your bra and top to the side to gain better access. You whimpered slightly, feeling overwhelmed by his ministrations. His hands were exploring every curve on your body and left behind a burning sensation on every part of bare skin he touched. When he reached the hem of your shirt again, he pulled away to look at you, pushing a strand of your hair out of your face.
“Do you really want to do this?” he whispered, searching for any sign of discomfort in your eyes. Your pupils were probably as blown as his, telling him all he needed to know, but he only continued once you nodded eagerly. You never expected Sunghoon to make you feel like this, and you couldn’t stop yourself no matter how hard you tried. So with your shirt gone, the rest of your clothes was soon to follow.
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The next morning, you woke up with a pounding headache, wincing slightly once you gained consciousness again. You did drink a lot, but you were still surprised how strong your hangover was. Taking notice of Sunghoon’s posters on the wall you didn’t think much, recalling how he brought you to his place because you were cold. However, when you noticed an arm around your waist, you froze. You slowly turned around to face Sunghoon, who was still dozing off next to you. Suddenly, you remembered what had happened last night. Images of you touching, exploring, feeling each other flooded your memory and your eyes almost popped out of your skull.
What did you do?! This wasn’t planned at all. You wanted to talk it out with him when the time was right and you both were sober again, not take it to the next level like this. Your breathing became uneven, and you noticed how a shiver ran down your spine.
As if on cue, Sunghoon stirred slightly, opening his eyes. When he looked at you still half-asleep, it was like he was staring at his most prized possession, and it overwhelmed you immediately.
“Good morning” he croaked out, voice still laced with sleep and a small smile playing on his lips. He closed his eyes again to stretch his body a bit, and when he finally opened his eyes fully to look at you, his expression dropped instantly. You just stared at him in shock and he felt his breath getting caught in his throat. He did not like that look at all.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, totally dreading your answer.
“What happened last night?” you asked, a question that was totally useless to ask since you already knew.
“You don’t remember?” Sunghoon questioned, noticing how his blood started running cold.
“I do, I just-“ you couldn’t find the words to express your thoughts right now. The whole situation stressed you out again, and you felt like you took advantage of Sunghoon when you both weren’t stone-cold sober.
“You didn’t enjoy it?” The moment he asked that question, you felt his touch on your skin again, the way he was holding you so carefully as if you were made out of porcelain. No matter how you twisted and turned it, you couldn’t say that you didn’t enjoy it. You did, very much in fact. But you still didn’t want it to happen, not like this.
“I- I did. It’s just… I felt like it was a mistake.” You said as you were slowly getting up, his arm that was around your side flopping down on the bed.
Hearing that sentence felt like being shot right in the chest, and Sunghoon slowly got up as well, looking at you in disbelief.
“Why would you say that?” he prompted carefully, trying to keep calm while noticing how you were collecting your jeans from the floor and squeezing yourself into them. This scene looked oddly familiar and Sunghoon started panicking.
“It shouldn’t have happened. Not like this. I’m sorry, I think I should go,” you managed to choke out, feeling like your airflow was cut off because you were so conflicted.
“Don’t do this to me. Not again.” He said, his voice becoming strict, a tone he had never used on you before.
You really didn’t want to do this to him. Not again. But something in you told you that this was a slip up, that you shouldn’t stay there, that you made a wrong decision under the influence. You didn’t know why you were so eager to get out of there, because deep down you knew this was exactly what you wanted. You craved him, now more than ever, but you manipulated yourself into thinking this wasn’t right. In your mind, you were ruining a perfectly fine friendship by hooking up with your best friend after a few shots of alcohol. You completely ignored the fact that he made the move on you again.
Ignoring his advances, you kept getting dressed, ready to leave until you were stopped by your best friend.
“Y/N, stop.” Sunghoon warned, once again using the tone you only heard him use on Yeji when she was being naughty. You gulped anxiously, turning around to face him. He stood in front of you in only his sweatpants, his milky skin glowing in the morning sun. He looked ethereal, and you hated it.
“I don’t get it. You apologized to me, craved being near me and I had the feeling you were just as into it as I was last night. And now you want to run from me again. What is going on?” he demanded an answer, and you could hear how frustrated he was. He ran a hand through his hair waiting for your response and all you could do was sigh.
“I don’t know, Sunghoon. I need time to think, okay?!” you were getting agitated because you realized you had no argument against it. Yes, you wanted this, yes you enjoyed it. And yet, you were terrified of the consequences. Of how quickly this escalated. Of how easily you managed to turn your friendship upside down.
“So I was good enough for a fuck and now you’re gonna dump me again? Is that it?” Sunghoon spat, and you were shocked at how petty he was getting. You had never witnessed him that angry before, not even with Yeji. He did rage from time to time, but never like this. And the fact that his anger was directed at you made your skin crawl.
“God, no! Don’t make conclusions like that. I just don’t want us to ruin our friendship, is it that hard to understand?!” your frustration was reflected in your raising volume, making Sunghoon flinch slightly. When you waited for Sunghoon’s reaction, you were stunned to see that he was laughing. A small chuckle escaped his lips before he clenched his jaw, looking at you with a gaze so cold it sent a shiver down your spine.
“Well, sorry to break it to you, Y/N. We already did.”
You gulped again, your shoulders that you had unconsciously raised in the heat of the argument relaxing when you smiled bitterly at him and nodded, tears blurring your vision.
“That’s too bad then.” You said in an unexpectedly calm voice before turning around and slamming the door of his room, leaving him behind just the way you did two weeks ago.
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When Yunjin rang on your doorbell, she couldn’t wait to recite her trip in every detail. Apart from the beautiful cities she visited, the boys she got to know in Italy were also something to talk about. There was so much to unpack from that trip that she announced a meeting of minimum 3 hours and told you to prepare snacks and drinks.
You were happy that Yunjin was finally back, especially after everything that happened between you and Sunghoon. There has been complete radio silence once again, since you were 100% sure he was incredibly mad at you and called your friendship quits after this. At first you were weirdly okay with the situation until it hit you a few days later that you guys had ruined your year-long friendship with some drunk sex. You were still in denial about him confessing to you and you reciprocating his feelings, instead you blamed the night you two kissed and jumped to base four right after for the end of your friendship.
The worst part for you was that you felt like you couldn’t go back. Even if you admitted that this was what you craved, even if you apologized for the ways you pushed him away even though you didn’t mean it, the way the recent events unfolded made it impossible to start a healthy relationship. Everything turned so messy so quickly that you felt like you lost control of the situation and now that you might be able to regain it, it’s too late. Sunghoon looked at you with a sense of disappointment you will never forget. It haunted you at night.
So, you were glad that Yunjin was finally back because you needed a shoulder to cry on. You missed her like crazy and you hoped she had a better summer break than you did so far to distract you from your misery. But with the way she proclaimed her return, you were sure she had a lot of funny stories to share.
What Yunjin didn’t expect when you opened your apartment door was how awful you looked. Hair disheveled, eyes glassy, the bags under your eyes looking alarmingly dark. Nevertheless, she couldn’t hide her excitement.
“Girl!” she screeched, embracing you before you could take a good look at her. The hugs she gave were always extreme, but they were especially tight when you haven’t seen each other in a while. Once she separated from you and took another look at you, she knew something was wrong.
“You look terrible, what is going on?” she questioned, fixing the strands of hair that were in the wrong place. The deep sigh you let out was more than worrying to her and you could tell she was on edge immediately.
“It’s a long story, tell me about your holiday first!” you tried to chime but the exhaustion in your voice was evident. You took the bag she brought with her out of her hand and went to the living room, settling on the sofa where she joined you.
“No, my recap can wait. What’s wrong?” she was quick to clarify. Another sigh from your side. Where to begin?
“I slept with Sunghoon.” Wow. That was the worst part to begin with. Congratulations. The way Yunjin’s mouth dropped and her eyes went wide didn’t help at all.
“WHAT???” she asked in disbelief. When she realized that you weren’t joking, she threw her arms in the air.
“Fucking finally! I told you, you two were meant to be together! How was it? Is he a good kisser? How did this even happen? Oh my God I’m so excited Y/N I need to know all the details! This is so good!!” Yunjin squealed and her excitement scared the shit out of you. How were you going to explain to her that this was nothing like she wished for?
She looked at you expectantly, but you only stared at her with an apologetic look. Her excitement died down soon and she mirrored your expression, a pout forming on her lips.
“Wait, it is not good?” It was a rhetorical question, really. If it was a good thing, you wouldn’t look this miserable and instead be glowing or something. You could tell the gears in her head were turning. Suddenly her eyes were widening again and she put her hands over her mouth in shock.
“Oh my God, are you pregnant?” This actually made you chuckle. Now she was thinking way too far.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not pregnant.” You clarified, unable to hide your smile because you couldn’t believe how dramatic she was being.
“Then what is it?” she asked impatiently and you decided it might be best to start from the beginning. You recalled your last two encounters with Sunghoon, and you felt like Yunjin has never listened to you with such interest. A girl was invested.
When you finished Yunjin sighed heavily, her face dropping the more the story progressed. You had a pleading look in your eyes, begging for her advice.
“Girl, why did you make everything so complicated?” she finally asked and you were a bit appalled that she was attacking you.
“What do you mean, I did? Sunghoon started this.” You clarified, slightly offended.
“No honey, Sunghoon came clean about the feelings he’s been harboring for you for quite some time, something you’re still in denial about.” Yunjin pointed out and rightfully so. Sunghoon did what you couldn’t do: admit your feelings for him.
“But he shouldn’t have. We were totally fine and he had to make it awkward. The fact that we drunkenly slept with each other didn’t help at all.” You dropped your head in your hands. “I feel like we overstepped a line by having sex.” Yunjin was quick to shake her head.
“Y/N, you already overstepped a line when you started catching feelings for each other. I just don’t understand why you push him away like that when you like him too.” She reasoned, articulating your thoughts.
“I’m not sure if I really want this. We’ve been friends for so long, I need him by my side no matter what.” You replied, chewing on your lip nervously.
“So you’re scared that your relationship might not work out and you’ll lose him as a friend?”
“I think so. I just don’t want our friendship to be ruined over a stupid slipup. Maybe we mistake our feelings for platonic love and wouldn’t work out as a couple at all. And then we binned a totally fine friendship for no reason.” You noticed how verbalizing your worries really helped you deal with the whole situation. You debated this way too much on your own already, it was high time for another opinion.
“I get where you’re coming from. But you must view it from this perspective: You have the most important basis for a good relationship. Trust and good communication. Well, the latter until fairly recently at least. You hang out a lot and don’t get tired of each other. You can openly talk to him about everything. He’s always on your mind. There’s pretty much only the physical part missing. Which is why I need to ask if you didn’t enjoy it now that you got physically closer to him as well?”
It was like Yunjin was stating the obvious, but she helped you realize that there was not much to be afraid of. You felt safe around him and he felt safe around you and that was the most important thing. But you still were so hesitant, why?
“No, I definitely enjoyed it.” In fact, you’ve been thinking about nothing else but how soft his skin felt on yours and how pretty his lips are. And you felt like this made everything even more difficult, because there was still something keeping you from committing to him fully when there were so many indicators that you’re meant to be.
“Well then, you’re standing in your own way. I know you’re terrified that this might go wrong, but it will certainly go wrong if you don’t fix this. You both deserve to be happy. And personally, I think you’re happy if you’re together. Look what being apart from him does to you.” Yunjin pointed out, looking you up and down. You scoffed but knew she was right.
“I just don’t know how to fix it. I feel like it’s too late. He already waited too long and probably gave up on us.”
“Oh, I don’t think so. You can’t just drop someone that quickly. He’s probably struggling just as much as you.”
“You did what?!” Jake asked in shock, similar to Yunjin’s reaction.
“I confessed, and she rejected me. Twice.” Sunghoon repeated, kind of embarrassed.
“Dude, I can’t believe this. I always thought she liked you back.” Jake furrowed his brows, pondering whether he had also misinterpreted your behavior. To him, it was clear as day that you both shared a mutual romantic interest in each other but were too shy to address it. So, when Sunghoon revealed what he had done, he initially got excited.
“Yeah well, I thought so too, especially since we had sex that one night after a party and-“
“You guys had sex???”
“Jake… ugh. Yes, we did. We were both a bit drunk though.” Sunghoon reasoned but the sparkle in Jake’s eyes told him it was to no avail.
“I’m impressed, not gonna lie. You confessed and then jumped straight to base four. Did you learn from me?” Jake couldn’t help but laugh, he found that situation way too amusing for Sunghoon’s liking.
“Man, what even is base four… anyway. The point is, she said she wanted this and also admitted she enjoyed it, but she basically fled the scene the next morning and hasn’t been reaching out since. I just don’t fucking know anymore.” Sunghoon ruffled his hair in frustration and let out a deep groan. Just the thought of you leaving him behind in his room shattered his heart into a million pieces.
He just didn’t understand it. He was on cloud nine when you nodded that you wanted this too, pupils blown wide and breathing uneven. He could feel your heart pounding like crazy, similar to his own. The way you were holding him gave him all the cues he needed to claim you as his. And yet, you slipped from his embrace hours later. What could there possibly be that kept you from being with him? All the signs were there that you felt the same. Or so he thought.
“Maybe she’s scared. You’ve been friends for quite some time, I wouldn’t want to throw that away lightheartedly either just because I was horny and drunk one night.”
“But I don’t see why this wouldn’t work. We worked perfectly fine the last couple of years as friends. We literally complete each other. What more could you want?”
“It’s still commitment, Hoon. Friendships are easier to keep and end than relationships. I think Y/N wants to protect herself from possible heartbreak by keeping you in the friendzone.” Jake reasoned, and Sunghoon wondered when he became so intelligent.
“So, we’re ignoring the fact that she is breaking my heart in the process?”
“Of course not. And it’s on you how much time you give her to make a decision. Do what’s best for you. If you feel like this drains you more than you could get out of it, it’s best to cut ties. You guys overstepped the line now anyway.” Sunghoon was surprised by Jake’s reply, it felt like the wisest advice he had ever given. When he told Jake about his feelings the very first time, his friend was less helpful.
Sunghoon felt like the world was caving in on him and he finally needed to break out of his shell, finally confide in someone what has been bothering him lately. Whenever you guys planned a meeting, he was more excited than usual to see you. And when he did, he felt butterflies in his stomach whenever you laughed. When you hugged or cuddled on the couch, he noticed how he always wanted it to last longer, for him to be even closer to you. Whenever you made a stupid joke and bickered with him, he couldn’t help but laugh, enjoying every second of being with you.
He didn’t know what was happening to him. It scared him that somehow, he wanted more from you than before. More attention, more laughter, more contact. You were on his mind 24/7. He started noticing the smallest things about you. How you changed your clothing style over time. How you did your hair a little differently, playing around with various simple but pretty hairstyles. He noticed overall how good you looked.
Sunghoon paid attention to details he never cared about before. He started complimenting you more because he felt like he needed to point out that he noticed whenever you changed something about yourself or put in that extra effort to get ready. And he was the proudest when you smiled at him and thanked him for the compliment. Though, you soon stopped taking it seriously and figured it was probably just part of your bickering.
The way his feelings for you changed confused him and after a while of dealing with it himself, he finally needed another opinion. When he called Jake to ask if he could come over because he needed help, the latter was surprised, to say the least. Sunghoon rarely talked about his worries, and when he did, he talked about them with you and not Jake. So, what could it possibly be that made him choose Jake over you?
Oh yeah, well, that. Once Sunghoon laid out to Jake how he certainly noticed something shifted whenever he is with you he could only but chuckle, leaving Sunghoon with a perplexed stare.
“Nice bro, you finally noticed? You’re pretty much the last one to do so.”
“What do you mean?” Sunghoon asked, confusion written all over his face. Jake couldn’t help but giggle and shake his head at his oblivious friend.
Basically everyone had noticed how you two got a lot closer suddenly, which caused rumors to start spreading that you secretly started dating. Jake and Jay even had a bet going who asked the other out first and he couldn’t wait for Sunghoon to confess that he was in fact dating you.
Everyone had noticed. Everyone but you two.
“You got to be kidding me. You so obviously like her, it wasn’t necessarily hard to spot.” Jake pointed out, which made Sunghoon’s eyes grow big. He gulped nervously, unconsciously playing with the hem of his shirt.
“Do you think she knows too?” Sunghoon asked, his brows knit together. What if you knew and chose to ignore it? Talking to Jake made Sunghoon realize that the shift in his behavior around you correlated with a shift in his feelings for you. He liked you. And he knew he was screwed before Jake could answer.
“Nah dude. She probably is just as oblivious as you.” Jake clicked his tongue nonchalantly. That somehow made Sunghoon release a breath of relief.
“What do you reckon I should do?” Sunghoon questioned. He couldn’t believe he was asking Jake, a retired but previously notorious player, for dating advice. Only Chaewon was able to get him interested in the actual dating life, but he proved miserable at that. Chaewon could handle it, fortunately, but Jake wasn’t the best person to talk about feelings. He didn’t do those until fairly recently.
“I don’t know, just wait and see what happens.” Yeah, Jake was really useless in that field.
“You’re not helping.” Sunghoon rolled his eyes in annoyance, making Jake raise his hands in defense.
“Bro, what do you want me to say? Confess and run into a disaster because chances are she doesn’t like you back? I personally think it’s mutual by the way she behaves, but who am I to judge.” He reasoned and Sunghoon nodded understandingly.
He had no choice but to observe your behavior from now on to find any clue whether you like him too. Jake was absolute garbage at giving advice, but Sunghoon decided to cut him some slack this time since it actually seemed the right thing to do. Damn, what has Chaewon done to him?
Sunghoon answered the same back then as he did now.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
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16 new messages in squaaaaad
Chaewonie ❤️: Guys, we haven’t had a cinema night in ages and they switched up the screening offer at our trusted cinema! How about dinner together with a cinema night as a squad now that we’ve all returned?
Hee Hee (seung): only if you promise not to make out with Jake three minutes into the movie
Ikeu: rude???
Ikeu: anyway, I’m in!
Meme Queen 😎: of course you are.
Ikeu: what’s with the disrespect today
Jjongsaeng: count me in too! dinner at our usual ahjumma? <3
Chaewonie ❤️: Obviously, I’ve been craving her Jjamppong the last few days!
DDEONU: I’m in too! so dinner’s on chaewon then?
Chaewonie ❤️: Dream about it Sunoo
Zuhaaa: count me in too
DDEONU: just checked the screenings, let’s go watch the new barbie movie!!
Hee Hee (seung): I changed my mind I won’t go
DDEONU: 😒
Meme Queen 😎: I’m in too by the way and I’m not a whiny little bitch like Heeseung so Barbie is fine
Hee Hee (seung) left the group chat
Meme Queen 😎: exactly what I’m talking ‘bout
You couldn’t help but chuckle at your stupid friends. Yunjin, who had her head in your lap, was similarly laughing at the text messages, especially when she added Heeseung back to the group chat and he started whining even more.
“Aren’t you going to write anything?” Yunjin prompted without looking at you.
“I don’t know if I’m going.” You admitted shyly, biting your lip. That made Yunjin turn her head to look at you with a raised eyebrow.
“Girl, don’t even think about cancelling.” She warned. You exhaled, throwing your phone away and running both hands over your face.
“Look, I just don’t want to make it awkward if Sunghoon is there.” You tried to explain, but Yunjin wasn’t buying it at all.
“Nah babe, we’re not doing that. Don’t destroy our friendship group because of something like that. Plus, it could be an opportunity to talk things out with Sunghoon.”
“If he joins.” You said absentmindedly. Yunjin clicked her tongue.
“And if he doesn’t then that’s on him and we’re going to have fun without him. But don’t ruin fun for yourself because he might be there. I know you want to go.” Ugh, you hated that Yunjin was (almost) always right.
“Fine.” You groaned.
Meme Queen 😎: I’m dragging Y/N along too
You cringed at the way Yunjin put it, but she wasn’t completely wrong. You weren’t too excited to go, because you had a bad feeling this could turn ugly if Sunghoon was to show up as well. Yes, it was a squad meeting, but you still had no idea how to act around him, let alone how he would act around you. Additionally, not everyone knew what went down. Yunjin had briefly updated Heeseung without too many details and you guessed Sunghoon might have told Jake, but other than that, no one was aware of the recent events. How awkward would that get?
Quite awkward. Sunghoon had announced that he would be coming as well, and since Yunjin already told everyone that you would be there too you had no way to back out of it. You persisted that you would show up together with Heeseung, too afraid that you might be the first to arrive and Sunghoon being second or the other way around.
To your surprise, Sunghoon was one of the last to arrive, very unlike him since he was always over-punctual. When you exchanged glances, a shiver ran down your spine. You tried to decipher his look but couldn’t, it held an emotion you had never seen before. You couldn’t hold his gaze either, quickly looking at Jake to greet him.
When Kazuha arrived at last, you went inside the restaurant to finally grab a bite. You only noticed then that you were starving, instantly plopping down on the first spot you saw. Yunjin sat down to your left and Jay aimed at joining you on your right, only to retreat while mumbling something about how Sunghoon is going to sit there anyway. It wasn’t intentional, Sunghoon and you always claimed to sit next to each other and sent grim looks to everyone who tried to get in your way. But this time was different.
Sunghoon and you exchanged shaky glances, still that undecipherable look in his eyes and with a small gulp, he situates himself on the other side of the table instead of next to you. This move earned confused glances from half the group, and you simply nodded with a sad expression coating your face. So that’s what we’re doing now, you thought. Great.
Thankfully, no one commented Sunghoon’s odd move and everyone sat down instead, Jay reclaiming the spot next to you. You could feel the tension at the table, something was in the air and everyone noticed. But no one dared to speak up. Those who knew just exchanged worried glances and those who didn’t simply looked confused. There was an unusual silence at the table before Chaewon finally managed to break the silence by asking what everyone wants to eat.
You released a breath you didn’t know you were holding and the whole situation drained you from the get-go. How were you going to survive the rest of the evening after such a bumpy start? You tried not to stare at Sunghoon too much and whenever you caught a glimpse of him looking at you, you panicked and looked away instantly. Sunghoon wasn’t any better, acting quite absentminded until Jake bumped him under the table. With a demanding glance Sunghoon knew immediately what he was trying to tell him. Jake, similar to Yunjin, made it clear that no fun was cut from the evening just because of your miserable situation. Sunghoon tried his best to join the conversation, but everyone could tell that something was weird.
After a rather awkward meal you made your way to the cinema, Yunjin linking arms with you as you tried to calm your nerves. This wasn’t going to be easy. The fact that everyone noticed the tension between you and Sunghoon made you incredibly nervous and you figured that you had to talk about it sooner or later tonight.
When you reached the cinema and the mood was still off, your body acted faster than your mind. Without hesitation, you grabbed Sunghoon’s arm, who looked at you quite alarmed. With a gaze that conveyed “Can we talk?” Sunghoon quickly nodded and followed you behind the cinema. Yunjin and Jake quickly exchanged knowing yet uneasy glances when they saw you disappear behind the building.
Once you reached the backside of the cinema, you stopped in your tracks. Not noticing how you still held onto Sunghoon’s arm, only his verbal reminder brought you back to reality.
“You can let go now.” It scared you how cold he sounded. You didn’t know if it was the unusually chilly night or if his voice really lacked the warmth you were so used to. You realized that you had to face him sooner or later, back still turned to him. You knew that turning around and looking at him will most likely break you and you were right.
When you made eye contact, you kept seeing a look in his eyes that you couldn’t decode. You usually could guess his opinion on things or his overall mood by how he looked at you or others, but this was different. This was a look he had never worn before, and it scared you.
And you made another dreadful realization. Shit. You hadn’t prepared this conversation at all. You had brought him here and were now at a loss of words. He looked at you expectantly, obviously waiting for you to talk first since you were the one who dragged him there in the first place. Your brain was short-circuiting, so you blurted the first thing to pop up in your mind.
“Hi.” Mentally facepalming yourself, you closed your eyes and shook your head. Sunghoon didn’t react to that at all either, waiting for you to actually articulate what you want to tell him.
“Look, we need to talk.” Is all you could choke out in nervousness, your voice betraying you by breaking in the middle of the sentence.
“We do?” Sunghoon’s question caught you off-guard and you looked at him generally confused.
“Yes, don’t you think so?” you prompted in disbelief. Sunghoon shrugged.
“Oh I did, but you don’t strike me as the person who wants to talk about this anymore after last time.” He admitted and you cringed at his words. You realized at that moment that you did know that tone of his. He used that exact tone when breaking up with Eunchae, a conversation you overheard as he wanted you nearby when it happened. It’s the voice he uses when he’s built a barrier to protect himself.
He's built a barrier. The fact that he felt like he needs to protect himself from you emotionally ripped your heart out, but then again you couldn’t blame him. Everything you did made this a justifiable response. And you were to make it worse.
“Sunghoon.” You called out to him weakly and his gaze softened for a split second upon hearing you call his name in such desperation. “I didn’t want this to happen. Not like this, believe me,” you said while taking a step towards him.
He didn’t back off, and you took that as a sign to continue.
“I never wanted to lose you as a friend, the thought of it makes me sick, and I panicked when you suddenly confessed. I didn’t know how to act so I chose to run away.” You tried to explain your point of view and he patiently waited for you to continue, as if he waited for a specific sentence.
Tell him it was a mistake to run from him. Tell him you like him too. Tell him you want this too. For some reason, you just couldn’t articulate those feelings. For some sick, twisted reason, you still weren’t sure if this is what you really felt. You still didn’t come clear about your emotions, about whether your feelings for him are platonically or romantically coded. You felt like you still needed to find out.
With one more step forward, you closed the gap between Sunghoon and yourself. Without thinking this through you took his face into your hands, connecting your lips in a swift motion. Sunghoon seemed slightly taken aback by your action but responded to the kiss nevertheless, his arms immediately wandering to your waist. However, he was quick to break the kiss, tightening his grip on your waist to put some distance between you.
“What are you doing?” he questioned in a serious, slightly disappointed tone, his brows furrowed. You looked at him with big eyes.
“I’m trying to make things right.” You said weakly, feeling extremely small under his strong gaze.
“No, you’re testing the waters.” He said and gave your hips a small push to create more distance between you. Your arms fell to your side lifelessly, tears threatening to escape.
“No.” you tried to defend but Sunghoon was able to shut you down quickly.
“Yes, Y/N. I can tell you’re still not sure about this. So stop bullshitting me.” He said it calmly but it felt like he spat those words in your face.
“I don’t-“ you tried again but he interrupted straight away.
“Listen to me. If you can’t come clean about how you feel for me then that’s on you. But stop playing with my feelings in the process. For the sake of our year-long friendship, I think we should have at least that much respect for each other.”
You were absolutely speechless. The way he delivered those words to you, you felt like he wasn’t feeling any emotion at all. It scared you that Sunghoon, who was usually very vocal and expressive, could articulate something so dryly. Only then did you realized just how much you have fucked up.
You have hurt Sunghoon so much with your indecisiveness that he completely shut you out. Backed off emotionally from you. For him to say those things so easily, it made your heart ache. You opened your mouth to speak, to protest, but there was nothing to protest about.
He was right, you played with his heart. He was nothing but honest with you and you rejected him not once, but twice. And now you thought a weak excuse and a kiss could fix it? Oh, how naïve you were.
Sunghoon saw you open your mouth to speak but he quickly shook his head.
“This conversation is over.” He announced, turning on his heels and walking away to the rest of your friends. This time, he left you behind and you started to understand how shitty it must have felt when you did it to him.
You stood there motionlessly, unable to move while trying to process what just happened. You were sure you deserved it for how you acted previously but you still didn’t know how to handle this situation. You tried your best to keep your tears in and collect yourself so you can get back to the group, but tears kept rolling down your cheeks and you sobbed quietly, hoping not to catch the attention of your friends.
In the meantime, Sunghoon made it back to the group alone, earning confused glances from the rest of your friends.
“Where’s Y/N?” Sunoo asked, brows furrowed because something was definitely off but he didn’t want to insist.
“Oh, she’s coming soon. Don’t worry.” Sunghoon said nonchalantly, but Yunjin and Heeseung exchanged concerned glances. Yunjin debated checking on you, sensing that whatever went down behind the cinema didn’t end well. She examined Sunghoon’s look, and he gazed back at her, as if challenging her. What is wrong with him? He never acted like this before.
Deep down, Sunghoon was sweating. He tried his best to act normal, to not let it get to him how absolutely gutted he left you there. But he couldn’t help himself. All the pain he experienced the last couple of days made him become petty. With Jake telling him to be careful not to hurt himself too much while waiting for you he decided it might be best to push his feelings to the back of his head.
The full ordeal was swallowing him whole. He wanted nothing but to hold you, talk to you, be with you, hear your beautiful voice through the phone, see your little frown whenever you complained about something. He missed you like crazy but he didn’t push any further after being rejected twice already.
On the one hand, Sunghoon believed he did everything right. He couldn’t go on pretending you were just friends when he has been falling for you harder the more time passed. Being honest to himself and to you was what you had unofficially promised each other and he wanted to keep that promise no matter what.
On the other hand, Sunghoon believed he did everything wrong. He caused this trouble by being selfish and pushing you towards a relationship you might not even want. You worked out fine, and one should never change a running system, right?
Wrong. He knew your friendship was doomed the first time he caught his heart skipping a beat upon seeing you, the first time he imagined what your lips would feel like on his own, the first time he hugged you for a second longer than usual because he didn’t want to let go just yet. But he hoped it wouldn’t end the way it did just now. He was pretty certain that this was it.
Even if you decided you felt the same, you probably wouldn’t come back to him after he delivered such a terrible line in the coldest tone he had ever used on anybody. He was scared of himself that he managed to treat you like this. That the harshest words he had ever spoken were directed to you
A few minutes later, you mustered up the courage to join the rest, having successfully dried your tears and calmed down enough for others to see you. When you turned the corner, you heard Sunoo scream for you in excitement, making Yunjin’s head snap towards you.
“Y/N! There you are, finally. Come on guys, let’s go or we’ll miss the first few minutes!”
You were quick to shoot him a smile, trying your best to hide the fact you just finished crying and had to control yourself not to burst out in tears again. Yunjin was immediately able to uncover your mask and shot Sunghoon another look, trying to piece together what might have happened back there.
“Are you okay?” she asked quietly enough for only you to hear, and you were fast to brush her off by nodding, but she didn’t buy it. You shot her a look that she shouldn’t persist and she got the memo, following you inside without prompting another question.
When Sunoo finished buying all the tickets and wanted to hand them out in seat order, he hesitated for a moment, not knowing whether he should put Sunghoon and you next to each other after he already refused to sit next to you during dinner. Noticing the stiff air between you (which really wasn’t hard to do), he decided against it and instead sat you next to Kazuha and Heeseung.
By now, no one in your friend group was unaware of the fact that Sunghoon and you were fighting, but no one dared to ask and interfere. Nevertheless, every time someone looked at you, they shot you apologetic glances and you swore you needed to get out of there. You really weren’t in the mood to watch a movie now, especially not a bubbly one like Barbie.
When you plopped down in your seat, you didn’t even bother shooting Sunghoon a glance as he passed you to sit further down the row. Heeseung sat next to you, whispering something about that you can leave if you feel uncomfortable, but you just ignored him. At the moment, your mind was blank and you just wanted the evening to end. You prayed to the gods that the movie will make you forget at least for a short while how heartbroken you are.
It seemed to work for the first half, however as the movie progressed you noticed how you replayed the conversation between Sunghoon and you in your mind endlessly. You couldn’t help but let one tear after another roll down your cheek, trying your best not to gain attention by sobbing. You sniffed as silently as you could but Heeseung noticed nevertheless.
And so did Sunghoon. When he looked over to you and saw you crying, he felt a sting in his heart. He really tried not to cry alongside with you, but the view he had of you not being able to control your tears ruined him. He tried hard to focus on the movie, noticing how Jake was studying his behavior next to him. Sunghoon chose to ignore it for his own sake. Just like you, he wanted to go home as quickly as possible.
Once the credits started rolling, you practically jolted from your seat to get out of the situation you were in. Of course the rest of your friend group took an eternity to get up, collect their stuff and leave the cinema. As soon as the warm summer air hit your nose, you turned around to everyone, announcing that you didn’t feel well and will leave early. Without bothering to wait for a response you turned on your heels, practically running away from the group, leaving a worried Yunjin and Heeseung behind.
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“Are you sure we shouldn’t just postpone the road trip until you figure things out?” Yunjin asked warily, wanting to make sure you really meant what you just told her.
“No way. Y’all waited so long for this! It’s our ritual as well. Please go, I just won’t join.” You clarified. You figured that after the cinema disaster, Sunghoon and you shouldn’t be in the same room for a while, not only for your own sakes, but also because it made the whole atmosphere awkward.
It was never your intention to affect your whole friend group with your problems, but here you were. You decided it was best for everyone if you were left out. You couldn’t see it since you were on the phone, but Yunjin shook her head firmly.
“And it’s also a ritual that we all go together. All of us. You included.”
“I get it, but I just don’t know how to act around Sunghoon and how he’ll act around me. I don’t want to ruin the trip for everyone.”
“Trust me, you will ruin it if you don’t come. Remember when Heeseung and Kazuha had a quick fling? The friend group didn’t break because of that either. Just act normal around him and you’ll be fine. You’re adults after all. I know you were so excited for the road trip, please don’t let that ruin the fun.” Yunjin tried to argue.
She felt slightly bad because it sounded like she was forcing you, but she knew that the squad road trip was your favorite part of the summer break. She was certain that this might be therapeutic for both you and Sunghoon. No way in hell would she let it happen that one of you left the friend group. She saw it as an opportunity to at least act civil around each other when in group settings.
“I know, I’m just scared to face him. What if I break out crying?” you played the worst scenarios in your head on how everyone would be annoyed by your whiny heartbroken ass.
“Then everyone will understand. The situation isn’t easy. And it’s okay to cry.” Yunjin reasoned. After the cinema night, everyone asked each other what happened between Sunghoon and you and the story spread like wildfire. When the first pitiful message from Chaewon arrived, you knew you were done for. You felt terrible for worrying everyone and you were afraid people were going to pick sides. To your relief, no one mentioned anything and left it to you two to solve the issue.
Yunjin noticed your hesitation and she could practically hear the way you wear nervously chewing your lip, so she sighed.
“Alright, listen. If you really don’t want to go, then don’t. We’ll understand. But I personally think it wouldn’t change anything if you stayed away. Unless you want to drown in your sorrows and don’t want me there to catch your tears. If you regret your decision it’s not my fault, just saying!”
You chuckled at her words. She was right, if you stayed home you would probably miss all of them and regret missing out on the fun. You promised yourself that you would try your best to act as normally as possible around Sunghoon. Still, the fact that you had to see him again scared you shitless.
Reflecting over the past few days made you come to the conclusion that you were incredibly stupid to deny him like that. You were angry at yourself that you couldn’t just admit that you liked him as much as he liked you. And even when you had another chance at making things right, you were still insecure whether it would be the right decision.
And now that you’re clear about your intentions, it was too late. Sunghoon ended the last conversation and you felt like it was final. There was no fixing now and no going back. So, you had to live with the fact that you ruined a potential relationship with your best friend who you had caught feelings for months ago. And no matter how you put it, it was a hard pill to swallow.
Little did you know that Sunghoon also regretted his decision. He came to realize that he might have been too harsh to you, that he reacted out of emotion and not reason. Sunghoon had never felt this strongly for anyone and it scared him, so he naturally thought he had to protect himself from potential heartbreak just like you tried prior. Guess you two were more similar than expected.
The more he thought about it, the more he understood where you were coming from. It was incredibly unfair how you treated him, but he started relating to it as he was going through a similar process now. Both of you made mistakes and both of you could have done better. What mattered now is how to fix it. And to say Sunghoon was terrified about his next steps was an understatement.
A couple of days later, you were all set and ready to go on the long-awaited road trip. You went over some requests with Yunjin, for example that you’d rather drive in a different car than Sunghoon so you won’t be stuck with him in a close space for hours. If you were in different cars, it would most likely be more comfortable for everyone involved, and Yunjin agreed.
You managed to squeeze yourself in the same car as Jay, who was driving, Heeseung, Kazuha and Chaewon. You were glad that you managed to get in Jay’s car because you believed him to be a better driver than Jake. Plus, Heeseung’s road trip playlist almost hit different, so you were in for a fun (and loud) ride.
Four hours passed by in a flash and you only realized that you arrived when Jay turned into the parking lot. Fortunately, the atmosphere in the car was lighthearted and you thanked yourself for making the decision to put yourself and Sunghoon in separate cars.
You also told Yunjin that you weren’t going to sleep in the same cabin as well, since that’s awkward. She respected that, assigning the cabins by gender anyway which earned groans from Chaewon and Jake who wanted to share one.
“You’re kidding right? The cabin is meant for 3 to 4 people, ain’t no way you’re going to do any nasty shit in there.” Yunjin scolded, earning a chuckle from the rest of the group.
“We were just going to cuddle, calm down.” Chaewon defended with a glare and Yunjin scoffed.
“Yeah sure, like last year?” Yunjin laughed and both Chaewon and Jake turned red, exchanging guilty looks. You couldn’t help but snort, catching everyone’s attention including Sunghoon’s. It was the first time you exchanged glances that day and you instantly felt goosebumps rise up your skin.
Was he always that handsome? You had a feeling Sunghoon looked even better than usual, or you were imagining things because you had been idolizing him the past couple of days. The more you contemplated your friendship, the more you realized how perfect he was. Seeing him now just confirmed your theories. You had been absolutely blind the last couple of months.
You gulped and quickly looked away, unable to catch the small smile that was playing on Sunghoon’s lips. He loved seeing you have fun and hearing you chuckle made his heart swell. Sunghoon realized he’s been so stupidly in love with you that there was no way he wasn’t trying to fix whatever you had ruined. He just didn’t know how he was to do that.
Once you dropped your stuff inside the cabin, half of your group went straight to the beach. Yunjin caught up with you and bumped your shoulder playfully, making you laugh. Even though you still felt down because of the whole situation with your best friend, you were really excited and relieved that you decided to go on the road trip. The beach and the scent of salt water instantly gave you serotonin and the karaoke session you had in the car raised your mood as well.
“How was the car ride? Ours was pretty boring, everyone slept half of the time and I don’t think Sunghoon has said a single thing the entire ride.” Yunjin recited and hearing his name made your heart skip a beat. As if on cue, Sunghoon was running past you to catch up with Jake, sparing you a quick glance. You didn’t know how to react, so you simply turned to Yunjin furrowing your brows in question.
Sunghoon always claimed himself to be an introvert, but you knew that especially in your friend group, he was glowing and more talkative than ever. The fact that he was quiet, even today, worried you. Yunjin could tell by the way you bit your lip that you were contemplating something.
“Will you try and talk to him?”
“I don’t know yet.”
Your attention quickly shifted towards Heeseung who was picking up Chaewon like it was nothing, running with her to the sea and throwing her into the water despite her obvious protests. She screeched in panic and when she got out of the water, she scowled at him.
“Oh, you wanna get fucked up.” She announced, fixing him with a challenging look and you could see Heeseung’s eyes turning wide before she lounges herself at him. He was quick to dodge her attack, running away as fast as he can despite the water inevitably slowing him down. When he locked eyes with you, it was like he locked in a new target.
The glint in Heeseung’s eyes scared you and the moment he approached you, you felt your heart sink into your stomach. Before you could object he was next to you, grabbing you by the hip and throwing you over his shoulder.
“You’re next.” He giggled and ignored the way you slapped his back and screamed for him to let you go. Unable to prepare yourself in time, you were suddenly being met with the cold ocean water engulfing your body. When you broke through the surface, you couldn’t help but burst out in laughter, a sound Sunghoon missed so dearly that when he took notice, his heart fluttered.
Even more laughter erupted from you when Chaewon kept her promise and surprised Heeseung from behind, pushing him underwater as well. The antics continued until you rescued yourself to the shore, Yunjin promptly throwing a towel your way. Jake was quick to catch Sunghoon’s longing gaze for you but decided not to blurt a stupid comment, instead smiling at the pining of his friend.
Once you settled down on the beach you stripped out of the shirt that you initially planned to keep dry, but Heeseung destroyed those plans. While wringing out the access water from the shirt, you observed how Sunghoon and Jake stripped out of their shirts as well, ready to join your other friends in the water. Upon seeing Sunghoon’s toned abdomen, you were instantly reminded of the night you shared together. It made your stomach twist knowing you could have had all this to yourself and let it slip from your grasp.
“Okay, now you’re just blatantly staring.” Yunjin commented with a click of her tongue and a chuckle, following your gaze. You were glad that the temperatures made your face blush already so Yunjin couldn’t detect the heat climbing up your cheeks.
When Jake noticed your fixated gaze on Sunghoon, he quickly whispered something to the latter, making him turn around in an instant to lock eyes with you. Your eyes widened immediately and you tried to be nonchalant about it, looking away quickly. Both guys smirked at that, making Jake lean into Sunghoon once more.
“What is that? You guys are acting like two teenagers going through puberty who are obviously crushing on each other but too shy to strike up conversation.” He pointed out and Sunghoon let out a deep, long sigh. If only it was that easy, he thought.
After you tired yourselves out in the water, you decided for a cliché bonfire to end the night. Sunghoon plopped himself down at the other end of the bonfire opposite from you, the flames almost swallowing your view on him. You didn’t know if he did that on purpose, but you couldn’t help and steal glances from each other whenever you were roasting marshmallows. This didn’t go unnoticed by anyone and Sunoo ended up judging you hard for constantly shooting heart eyes at each other from afar.
You actually hadn’t talked all day, it was silent pining from both sides and it made your friends go absolutely crazy. Could you finally get it over with?
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Unfortunately, the pining continued the next couple of days, neither of you ready to approach the other. It was frustrating you, to say the least. You figured that it was his turn to come to you after he ended the conversation the last time. Additionally, you didn’t want to embarrass yourself again like you did at the cinema.
You couldn’t pinpoint the atmosphere between you two, it seemed somewhat stiff yet not as terrible as it was during the cinema night. Anyone could tell that you both reflected on your behaviors and had a different mindset from before, so it was just as frustrating for your friends to notice your constant pining. Sunoo judged even harder than usual.
Yunjin tried to talk some sense into you, but you swiftly refused to make the first step. She ruffled her hair in frustration while washing her face to get ready for bed.
“Y/N please. Put your pride aside for once, this isn’t going anywhere.” She nagged in a way that reminded you of a typical Korean ahjumma.
“Y/N I have to agree with Yunjin for once. This is absolutely nerve-wrecking for all sides.” Chaewon added, turning around in her chair and interrupting her skincare routine.
You groaned. Couldn’t they let you deal with that alone? The situation was hard enough as is, it didn’t help that eight people kept track of your every move on top of it.
In the cabin next to yours, the boys were similarly pushy towards Sunghoon, earning annoyed glances from him. Like you, it annoyed him how everyone was observing and waiting for one of you to make a move. He wanted to figure this out with you alone, not while a whole group of people was watching.
That night, the constant nagging from your friends made you spiral into overthinking everything again. You dissected your conversations with Sunghoon once more, not able to get a wink of sleep or even feel tired. The whole ordeal stressed you out to the point where you needed to let go a bit. Not wanting to bother your cabinmates, you snuck outside, making your way to the pier to sit down and watch the moon a bit. The warm breeze that tickled your nose made you inhale deeply.
Such a beautiful vacation that is troubled by Sunghoon and my relationship, you thought. You really made it difficult for yourselves. This could have been so easy and yet you chose to do it the hard way. You still wondered why your head blocked you from telling Sunghoon what your heart wanted all this time. Why it took you so long to let those feelings take over. Why it was met with so much denial from your end in the first place.
You were now more sure than ever that you wanted to have Sunghoon by your side. The thought of having to continue life without him scared you to bits and you hoped you would never have to experience the reality of it, even though there was still a possibility he wouldn’t let you in anymore.
The more you thought about it, the more overwhelmed you became. A single tear ran down your cheek, quickly followed by another until you were silently sobbing into nothingness, the vision of the moon in front of you becoming blurry.
The sound of footsteps approaching snapped you out of your daze and you quickly wiped your tears, thinking it was one of the lifeguards scolding you for being on the pier so late. You were about to utter a half-assed apology when you turned around only to be met with Sunghoon standing a few feet away from you on the pier.
Sunghoon couldn’t doze off either, staring at the ceiling when he picked up a shuffling sound outside. He silently got up, making sure not to wake the others, and went over to the window only to see you emerge on a journey to the pier. He didn’t know what came over him, but his feet moved on their own and before he knew it, he was at the pier too.
It felt like everything froze for a moment when you locked eyes, a concern shading his gaze that made you shiver. You didn’t know what to say, your heartbeat picking up from his mere presence. You never noticed the effect he had on you until this trip.
“I’ve never liked to see you cry.” He said softly, almost as if he was pitying you, but you knew how he meant it. You sniffed in response, turning around since you suddenly felt hyperaware about how ugly you must have looked right at that moment.
The wood creaked underneath Sunghoon when he approached you, slow and cautious as if he was afraid you would freak out otherwise. When he stood right behind you, he contemplated his next move, biting his lip nervously. Just like you, he hadn’t thought this through. Suddenly standing in front of you overwhelmed him, and he needed a moment to calculate his next move.
“May I?” he suddenly asked, pointing at the spot next to you. You didn’t dare look at him now that he was so close, so you simply nodded. From the corner of your eye you could make out how he was sitting down. Scared to make eye contact you focused intently on the clouds forming above you.
Silence engulfed you and the only sound you could make out is that of the waves crashing at the poles of the pier. You didn’t know how to strike conversation and he seemed similarly in thought of how to carry on. Suddenly you wondered if he wasn’t saying much because he was still mad at you, and the thought alone made you anxious. You sighed heavily, being overly curious all of a sudden.
“Will you ever not be mad at me anymore?” you spoke up carefully, afraid that this question alone will make him snap. He turned out to be very calm, though. You didn’t know if that soothed your nerves or freaked you out even more. Sunghoon had the faintest of smiles playing on his lips.
“I’m not mad at you. I was disappointed and confused because I couldn’t figure you out.” He explained, making you scoff.
“I couldn’t even figure myself out, how were you supposed to?” you turned to him with curved eyebrows, and it was the first time on the trip that you saw him this close. The look in his eyes held something you couldn’t quite pin down again, but this time, it was much softer. It calmed you down, sending an exciting shiver down your spine.
His smile grew upon your rhetorical question and you swore he never looked better. You loved seeing him smile, seeing those dimples forming. You couldn’t help but mirror his expression, silently exchanging words you didn’t dare to speak out loud. You noticed how this situation calmed you down and made you incredibly nervous at the same time. You didn’t know where this was going.
Your smile dropped suddenly, and so did Sunghoon’s. He furrowed his brows softly, and you wished to flatten the crease forming between his eyebrows. Anxiety glossed over your eyes and you decided to be honest with him.
“I’m scared, Sunghoon.” He nodded understandingly and it looked like relief washed over him. For a moment he got terrified, thinking that you might turn him down once more. It wouldn’t make sense, but nothing made sense to him anymore anyway.
“I’m scared too.” He admitted, looking down at this hands that he was fidgeting agitatedly. You couldn’t describe it, but he looked tense and relaxed at the same time. Tensed because he was fearing ultimate rejection, relaxed because no matter what, your presence eased his mind.
Your mind suddenly threw you back to everything you two had been through. Several tragic exam seasons, friends of yours moving away, petty fights in the group chat over something completely stupid and reconciliations joined by tears and hugs, heartbreaks on both ends and comfort when each other’s grandparents died. You had survived so many tragedies together, so there was logically speaking no way you could not overcome this one.
Realization hit you that it was now or never. You had to tell him how you feel, honestly this time. No hiding, no beating around the bush. You forced yourself to say the words you were scared of for so long.
“I like you.”
It took Sunghoon’s head only a millisecond to snap towards you, as if he had to make sure what he heard was really what you had said. You locked eyes again and the way his gaze changed almost made your heart jump through your chest. He looked like he had finally heard the words he wanted to hear from you for such a long time. The only thing he ever wanted to hear from you.
Sunghoon was malfunctioning because now that you had finally confessed to him, he didn’t know what to do. As stupid as it sounds, because he had more than enough time, he didn’t prepare for this scenario. Not even in his daydreams did he play this scene out in his head. He had always skipped the awkward confession and jumped right into the domestic relationship stuff.
Sunghoon gulped and took a deep breath to calm his nerves. There was only one right answer, and he knew it.
“I like you too.”  
The sparkle in your eyes didn’t go unnoticed by Sunghoon when he uttered those words again, the words that had left a bitter taste in your mouth when he rushed them out for the first time. But now all your stomach could do is hurt from all the butterflies, the look in your eyes finally reciprocating those of the boy in front of you.
You sit there for a moment, basking in each other’s presence and slowly coming to terms with the fact that you were on the same page about this after all. You were scared that Sunghoon will never want to speak to you again, and right now you couldn’t be happier that he decided to approach you one more time, giving you the chance to rebuild your relationship on a different level.
After a while of staring at each other and taking in each other’s confession, you couldn’t help but burst out into laughter together. This whole ordeal was so stupidly romantic despite the bumpy start and you had a hard time trying to contain your amusement.
“We should have done this the first time already.” You admitted, shaking your head at the painful memory of Sunghoon scaring you away with his revelation. Sunghoon couldn’t help but raise his brows at you in disbelief.
“Yeah? Well, whose fault was that?” he challenged and guilt glossed over your face, your lips forming a pout. The boyish grin he was wearing only grew wider.
“Stop blaming me, I know I fucked up.” You acknowledged, dropping your head in shame. Sunghoon was quick to shoot a hand under your chin, making you look up at him again.
“We both did. It’s fine.” He reassured with a smile, and you could only do so much as copy it. Silence took over once again, his hand slowly dropping from under your chin, landing on your own. You noticed that Sunghoon was pondering over something, and the mischievous smirk that was forming didn’t help.
You threw your head back in agony. He was getting playful again and you hated loved it.
“Oh boy, what is it now?” you were careful to ask, not sure if you really wanted to know what was on his mind right now. Sunghoon cleared his throat.
“You know, I just think it’s funny that you told me to get laid and then turned out to be the person to do it shortly after.”
Yep, you didn’t want to know what was on his mind. He chuckled and your face ran pale upon hearing him. You groaned in frustration, hiding your face in your hands in embarrassment. Your shy reaction made Sunghoon laugh even harder, throwing his head back in his usual manner and he couldn’t help but tease you a bit since he hadn’t done it in a while. Seeing your agitated look was enough to satisfy him.
You were so immersed that you didn’t notice the wind picking up speed and the clouds thickening. Only when an especially strong breeze almost swept you from the pier did you realize that a storm was coming.
“I think we should go.” Sunghoon nodded in agreement and the moment you got up, you felt the first drop of rain hit your face.
It wasn’t the last one for sure and before you knew it, it was pouring. You quickly came to the conclusion that running to the cabins would be too far, so you opted for the little lifeguard hut near the beach instead. The cold rain hitting you made your legs carry you to the hut even faster, unconsciously intertwining Sunghoon’s hand with yours.
You yelped a little when he pushed you forward, motioning you to hurry up since the rain was hitting you at high speed now. Whatever you expected from tonight, it was not going to bed soaking wet. But it also wasn’t Sunghoon and you to reconcile. You win some, you lose some.
After what felt like an eternity, you finally reached the small veranda in front of the hut. Thankful that the porch had a canopy, you breathed heavily and relaxed against the walls of the house. You glanced at Sunghoon and noticed that he was completely drenched from head to toe. Much to your dismay, you realized that you were just as soaked. But the moment you caught each other’s eyes, you couldn’t help but giggle again.
The hopeless romantic in you couldn’t be happier right now. You watched as the rain only poured harder, so you had no choice but to stay under the canopy for a while.
You noticed Sunghoon was struggling with his hair, one strand always falling into his eyes no matter how many times he tried to push it back. You couldn’t help yourself, your hand shooting up towards his face to fix it.
“Here, let me.” You said, fully turning to him while he did the same. Instead of fixing it, you ruffled his hair even more, causing several strands to drop in front of his eyes. Despite the hair covering his eyes, you could feel the unimpressed look he probably gave you. You snickered and proceeded to actually fix his hair this time.
Once you finished tugging his hair back, you noticed how much he was staring at you. You slowly retracted your hand from his hair, trying to decipher his look. Nothing but love, you concluded, and it was confirmed once he opened his mouth to speak.
“I really want to kiss you right now.”
Your heart hammered in your chest at his words. The longing in his eyes almost made you faint and without a second thought, you pushed yourself forward to connect your lips. It took you only a second to melt into him, lips moving like they had always belonged together. Sunghoon’s hands were quick to find your waist again while yours wandered around his neck.
“Closer.” He whispered against your lips, pulling you towards him by your waist, close not being close enough as his lips worked wonders against your own. You were trying to lean back to catch your breath, but Sunghoon didn’t let you, chasing after your lips relentlessly as if he had to make up for something. Your back was arched and Sunghoon towered over you, making you feel even smaller.
You couldn’t help but let your hand wander into his hair, scratching his scalp slightly, which elicited a small gasp from him. Taking the opportunity, you let your tongue slowly dance against his own and he was quick to follow along.
Sunghoon only broke apart from you when he felt like suffocating, pressing his forehead against yours to catch his breath. You opened your eyes slowly, instantly being met with his own. You had never felt so cherished before, so adored. The moment you caught him staring at you with the most loving gaze, you couldn’t help but break out into a smile which he quickly mirrored.
Time seemed to stand still, the rain only a faint background noise as you basked in each other’s presence once again. The kiss and your gazes held so much emotion, so much you two wanted to share with each other earlier but couldn’t. But no matter how chaotic things got at the beginning of the summer, you wouldn’t want to be anywhere else at that moment.
“Do you really think we need to take pictures?” A hushed whisper could be heard from one of the cabins.
“Of course! The others wouldn’t believe us if we just told them.” Another voice responded, almost drowned out completely by the rain.
“We’re going to tease them about this to no end, are we?”
“Oh, absolutely.”
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Masterlist
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dark-frosted-heart · 6 months ago
Text
Crown’s S Class Mission - Roger Barel (Bitter End)
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As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this.
Roger: Hold up. Not gonna let you kill my cute student. Now then, it’s time for Instructor Roger’s fun and exciting punishment.
Master of the estate: Oliver, shut that guy up!
Instructor Oliver: The one who needs to shut up is you.
Oliver grabbed the man and pinned him to the floor.
Master of the estate: *cough* Wha-what are you doing!
Instructor Oliver: I can’t lie to myself anymore. That’s all.
Roger: Capture everyone involved.
--
What awaited was an unimaginable scene.
Roger used rigorous muscle training to punish those involved.
When they were no longer able to stand, they were handed over to the police.
Kate: The Beauty Muscle Club has pretty much dissolved.
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Roger: That’s good. And all the hospitalized women will be compensated.
Kate: While money won’t fix their situation…I hope it’ll help, even if just a little.
Oliver the instructor also came forward as one of the accomplices.
After atoning for his crimes, he planned on running his own sports gym.
He wanted to establish a place for women to work out together.
???: Um, excuse me…
Kate: Emilia…
Emilia’s wise gaze caught mine when I turned around. 
(...If she overheard us, she knows that she got deceived, doesn't she?)
(...What can I say to her—)
Emilia: Um, thank you so much!
Kate: Huh?
Emilia winked and smiled.
Emilia: I’ve faced a series of disappointments, but I can’t let that get me down.
Her strength revealed how much she had gone through in her life.
Kate: …I’ve also faced a series of disappointments. I could only think about how useless and pathetic I was. But I can’t stay depressed.
Emilia: I agree. I’ll see you around. Take care of yourself, Kate.
While I waved goodbye to Emilia, I noticed Roger’s gaze on me.
Kate: What is it?
Roger: Nothing. Just thinking about how you’re growing into a fine woman.
Kate: D-don’t praise me out of the blue. Besides, it’s not like you raised…
Roger: Yeah, yeah. Anyway, as a reward for growing up well, I’m taking you out somewhere nice.
--
Roger took me to a restaurant by Big Ben.
Roger: Been coming here ever since Ellis told me about it. Basically, everything here’s pretty good.
(...Roger brought me to such a nice restaurant)
Alarms bells started going off in my head.
Kate: …Are you’re going to make me do something again?
Roger: What do you take me for?
Roger stifled back a laugh and stared straight at me.
Roger: Don’t worry. There’s nothing behind the reward today.
Emma: …Reward?
Roger: I saw how hard you’ve been working…Good job.
(Ah…)
Hearing those words, it was clear that he brought me here as a reward.
Kate: Thank you…But, I don’t deserve it. I got too emotional to make rational decisions.
Roger: I suppose that’s true. But I would’ve slapped that guy myself if you didn’t. He deserved it. Getting angry for the sake of others is admirable.
Kate: …
Roger: Kate.
Kate: Yes?
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Roger: You’re strong enough.
(What do I do…I’m going to cry)
Roger’s carrot and stick method always disturbed my heart.
If he did this on purpose, then he’s pretty evil.
Roger: Oh it’s here. The roast beef here’s delicious. Here.
The simple look on Roger’s face when he looked at the meat blew my sentiments away.
Kate: Hehe…It really does look delicious…
Roger: … Hey, Kate.
Kate: Yes?
Roger: Being strong doesn’t mean doing things alone. Being able to rely on someone’s also a strength. So you can rely on me.
After saying that, Roger took a huge bite out of the meat.
Roger: Mmm, yum. Come on, it’s getting cold.
Kate: O-okay. Mmm…Wow, it’s really good! It’s so juicy and tender. It’s amazing.
Roger: …o_o Hahaha! You’re as restless as ever. Remember to chew. My family’s corgi used to eat so fast that they’d choke. They look just like you.
Kate: There you go again comparing me to a dog!
Roger: All that barking’s the same too.
Kate: Ugh…
We argued like usual, but my heart felt warmer.
Roger’s words made me feel really happy…and I kept arguing with him so that he wouldn’t notice.
--
Some time later, I joined Jude and Ellis on another mission.
Ellis: Kate, you’ve been moving pretty smoothly.
Kate: Thank you. I’ve been doing strength training.
Jude: Ya still lookin’ pretty soft.
Kate: I-I’m planning on gaining muscle!
Ellis: Good luck, I’ll be cheering you on.
Ellis smiled and put his lips close to my ear.
Kate: Ellis…?
Ellis: Kate, Roger’s going to be in the lounge tonight.
Kate: Huh?
Ellis: You want to report your hard work and get praised, don’t you?
Ellis smiled gently at my surprise.
(I didn’t say that…)
Ellis: Or do you want to go out to dinner?
Kate: I’m heading back. I…have things to do in the castle.
I wonder how Roger will react when I tell him how I did today.
I definitely didn’t want him to know that I was walking a little faster than usual.
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