#again before anyone thinks I'm making a judgement on Ascended!Ending I'm literally writing a horror story. none of this is canon!

[wetcatspellcaster]

Hi dear Ms. Wet Cat, I’d like to scream about the latest Pieces chapter if that’s all right!

I think taking away flirting from Astarion is fucking GENIUS. It’s so fascinating to see him try to navigate direct communication and being so… honest?? We all knew but the contrast really illuminates how much he was actually deflecting all the fucking time.

Also I’m now so invested in Astarion and Ser Verity’s relationship I’m not even kidding. You write her delightfully. And I realized we definitely need to see more Astarion/cat action in general. Let 👏🏻 Astarion 👏🏻 pet 👏🏻 cats 👏🏻 (and wear jumpers because that was fucking adorable)

I’ve been thinking about your Astarion and wanted to ask you — do you think he is sort of even more weary of himself than in game? Cazador controlled him but not to the point of complete override like Ascendent did. He used ALL of him, none of him was his own. And now even tiny things like his body language and ways of communicating feel tainted?

hello very lovely anon, thank you for the message! <3

I'm really thankful for the kind feedback! Act 3 has weirdly and accidentally become the most AU characterisation of both characters, and I only appreciated this once I'd returned to my in-game narrative lmao. Astarion is feeling guilty and weird about flirting!! Rosalie is just tired and wants a hug!! He's waiting for an explosive argument and a roast that's never going to come, because Rose said all she needed to to the Ascendent and she just wants to rest!!

Anyway, it means the chapters are taking a little longer to draft and a lot more thought than usual. I'm really thankful people are enjoying it, I think it's going to be fun getting them both back onto an even keel but I'm doing it carefully. Knowing readers are still on board with my shenanigans is always a relief lmao.

As to your question! I one day dream about writing a meta post of what the Ascendent is so I can explain every facet of my thinking, but the fear the Ascendent represents to me is [REDACTED - to be explained in due course], and the fear he represents for Astarion is a mixture of extreme, unpleasant dissociation in traumatic episodes, [REDACTED - to be explained in due course], and the idea that someone only ever wanted the facade. That they only ever wanted the experience the body and what the body could facilitate, with no care for what's underneath. So yeah, he's feeling some kind of way about himself. Like yes, he's done horrible things to Rosalie, but he wasn't in control of any of it - that's the dissociation. You're right, it did use all of him. But he also has a set of memories confirming that what people wanted from his was just sexual fantasy and power, and so while there's disgust at his own behaviour and the time he's lost basically being driven by an outside force, there's also the knowledge that people liked him like that, which um. I don't know. Confirms a lot of what I think his fears are? That personally would cause me to freak out. No wonder flirting feels weird!

(To end on a lighter note, Ser Verity is a combination of three cats in my life, my two little demons and then my bestie's cat, so truly like. just a chimera of cat energy!)