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bumbleb-tch · 4 years ago

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Fic Masterlist

Series:

Leather and Lace- Rating: T Word Count: 7,849 Summary: Adrienette, No Magic Au, Tattoo Parlour/Flower Shop AU, 2 works Nearly every day, Marinette left her shop for what he assumed was her lunch break just after Adrien opened, the first few times he saw her were coincidence, but every time she passed she never failed to aim a cheerful wave and smile in his direction-and stop to flirt with Plagg. Without even really noticing it, Adrien stopped taking clients right when he opened, and started getting ready earlier, just so he could make sure he was casually lounging in his lobby when Marinette passed every day. Pathetic? Maybe. Chloe certainly thought so. This had continued for months now, and Adrien still couldn’t pull himself together enough to actually go talk to her, but honestly, the glowing smile she gave him every day through the window was the highlight of his day. Of course, the following minutes where she talked with his cat and showered the goblin with attention was the most irritating part of his day.

A Drunk Chat’s Words- Rating: M Word Count: 6,325 Summary: Marichat, Drunk!Chat Noir/Hungover!Chat Noir, 2 works “You are the most beautiful creature I have ever been blessed to lay my eyes upon,” the voice was cooing, a bit unsteadily, if she was honest, not that it soothed her nerves that much. “Just a perfect little kitty, aren’t you? You’re so good. Your tiny paws? Spectacular. Your adorably pink nose? 10/10 would boop…” The voice continued but Marinette stopped focusing on the words, too focused on the suspiciously familiar cadence prompting her to creep back into the living room, where she was greeted by the sight of her superhero partner crouched on all fours on her balcony. Worst of all, he seemed to be engaged in a rather emotional discussion with her cat.

Multichapter:

Just a Shadow of Myself- Rating: T Word Count: 13528 Summary: Marichat, Adrienette, Ladrien, Ladynoir, Soulmate AU, Shadow Swap 23:55 p.m. Five more minutes until Marinette’s 16th birthday chimed. If she was lucky enough to be the younger half of her soulmate pair then her shadow would switch with her soulmate’s until they met, and slowly fade back to her own over time. The way she figured, with all of Ladybug’s luck she would be the younger one, which meant in five minutes she’d be on the start of her journey towards her soulmate.

Oneshots:

Resonance- Rating:T Word Count: 1495 Summary: Ladynoir, Soul Eater AU If someone had told her a few months ago that she’d be moonlighting as a superhero meister with an overly flirtatious tomcat as her partner, trying to take down what could only be called a supervillain-who despite having failed to defeat them 78 out of 78 times, apparently was so consumed by his own hubris and self confidence that he refused to back down- Ladybug would laughed until she cried. But here she was, 14 year reigning champ of the clumsiest girl alive, going toe to toe with a terrorist on the biweekly, resonating with her partner to a mind blowing magnitude. Ladybug’s belief was that the Miraculous amplified both their ability to resonate, as well as the power of their individual souls. Chat liked to insist that it was because they were partners, destined to be a perfect match-infuriatingly charismatic, as always. Tikki had suggested it might be some of both. In any case, Ladybug didn’t know if she could ever have another partnership compare to this one.

Excuse me, sir- Is this your cat?-

Rating: G Word Count: 1875 Summary: Adrienette, No Magic AU, Cat!Plagg, Dog!Tikki Marinette ran her fingers through her hair in exasperation, making direct, challenging eye contact with him. Seconds passed in silence. She blinked first. The cat seemed smug. Or as smug as a cat who theoretically didn't have more cognitive understanding than a three year old could. Stomping her foot in an indignant and almost childish manner, Marinette scowled, “Look Mr. Noir,” she didn’t think he liked the name very much but she couldn’t just call him Cat, “We need to go to the pet store to try and find your owner.”

The Trials and Tribulations of Adrien Agreste, RA Extraordinaire- Rating: T Word Count: 1595 Summary: Adrienette, College AU, No Magic AU Adrien was beginning to regret his decision to spend the day walking the dorm and introducing himself to as many residents as possible. It had seemed like such a solid plan when he’d finished moving in early and found himself with nothing to do. He was the new RA and he’d felt it would be good to have as many residents know him and what he looks like as soon as possible. Oh how wrong he had been. 2 floors, 3 hours, and 14 phone numbers later, he still had another 2 floors to go, and if Adrien heard one more too high squeal about how glad someone was that such a nice sweet guy like him was the new RA, he would dive out the nearest window.

I just came here for the drugs (so stop your faking)- Rating: T Word Count: 4951 Summary: Adrienette, Sick!Drugged!Adrien “Hey, can you hold this?” Adrien asked, passing her his bag before she could respond. While she held it, blinking vacantly, he dug inside until he unearthed a massive bottle of Nyquil. He set the bottle on the desk and reclaimed his bag, tucking it away before fiddling with the cap of the bottle. Seconds passed as he struggled, seemingly unperturbed by his lack of success. All the while, Marinette was beginning to twitch with the effort to not do it for him. Just as she was about to snatch it from him, the cap came off and he hummed victoriously. Then Adrien lifted the bottle to his lips and tipped it back, chugging long enough to make her concerned. “I don’t think that’s how you’re supposed to take it,” Marinette breathed, not sure what else to say when he’d just taken a quarter of a bottle of Nyquil like he was hoping he wouldn’t wake up ever again. --- Adrien has the sniffles and makes the incorrect assumption that tripling his dose of Nyquil will triple the effects. It doesn't. Oh, and he and Marinette are supposed to be doing a project together.

WIPs:

3 is a Magic Number- Rating: T Word Count: 3818 Summary: Ladynoir, Adrienette, Polyfic (but it’s a surprise), Soulmate AU, Red Strings of Fate AU, 1/2 Chapters She took a deep breath and forced her eyes open, first noting Chat frozen in front of her and then quickly turning to her notes to scribble down what she’d noticed so far. Marinette’s fingers tingled with restless energy, and she underscored ‘possible addictive properties’. “Chat? Status update.” The boy sputtered to life behind her, stammering a series of disjointed not-quite-words and landing on, “Uh, this?” Marinette rolled her eyes, “Ten points to Hufflepuff for clarity and precision,” She reached up to brush away her bangs with her other hand, something red drifting into her periphery. “What the hell?” Shooting up, she spun to face her partner, holding her hand up in front of her face. Two neat bows of red string were tied around her pinky, loose ends from each drifting down and away from her. One spanned the short distance between herself and Chat, nearly taut and almost glowing, a low hum emanating from it. The other tumbled to the floor, loops tangling with another string that she chased back up to Chat’s finger, the pair stretching out the window and into Paris. --- Alternatively, a day testing recipes from the grimoire takes a sharp twist of fate

Smoke and Mirrors- Rating: M Word Count: 14385 Summary: Marichat, Ladynoir, Double Akumatization, 9/? Chapters White glinted in the light cast by the door, and Marinette's blue eyes met a colder but equally anxious gaze. Her blood froze in her veins, a strangled whimper escaped her throat unbidden as she was thrust full force into the memory of the last time she'd seen those eyes. Of a broken lonely boy in an empty world and feeling herself dissolve into ash and slip between her own fingers. A fear stronger than any she'd felt facing an akuma clutched her heart in it's grasp, and Marinette realized her cheeks were wet.

love is a bloom, nurtured by my tears(and choked by my sorrows)- Rating: M Word Count: 20051 Summary: Marichat, Coffee Shop AU, Kwamiswap, 5/? Chapters Marinette loved her partner, no question. But at some point in six years, she’d stopped feeling it. She’d stopped feeling anything. And she called love a scam enough times that she actually believed it. So every night, patrol or not, Marinette would go to bed by 1:00 a.m., to get enough sleep for the next day. Every day of her life, she’d scheduled down to the minute. An endless routine that she lived for years, carefully designed to make sure that her life was so full of work and responsibilities and alarms, that maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t notice how empty it was.

#mircaulous ladybug #mlb #mlb fanfic #masterlist #my works #Marichat #adrienette #ladynoir #ladrien #bumbleb_tch #BBMasterlist

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crazycat-88 · 5 years ago

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Male Goblin Iker x Female Reader (NSFW)

Here’s the next story in my Modern Monsters In The City series.

@sneezy-s asked for a female reader with a goblin but left the content up to me, so... I hope you like it.

Words:3,628

You felt like a creep, peeking around your curtains to spy on your neighbour, a goblin who lived opposite you. Your grandmother had a name for people like you, ‘a curtain twitcher‘. You just couldn’t help it, he was just so intriguing. The fact that he was also your type, you had always liked them on the short side, was completely coincidental.

Most of the goblins who you had seen before wore suits or at the very least smart clothing and they all seemed to work in finance. You know of course that not all goblins are bankers or accountants and that you shouldn’t stereotype a whole race of creatures. It’s just that while you had heard of goblins with jobs in other fields you had never met one.

That’s why you were so intrigued by your neighbour, he didn’t wear smart clothes, every time you saw him he was wearing plain black trousers and a t-shirt, that usually had a funny quip or band logo on it. He also had tattoos, an earring on the top of one of his long pointy ears and he drove a motorcycle. Even more intriguing was that the hours he worked were odd, he didn’t leave for work until one and got home around midnight. He was unlike any goblin you had ever seen and you couldn’t help your curiosity. He’d only moved into the neighbourhood about three months ago and in all that time you hadn’t spoke to him once.

Which is why you find yourself watching him from out your window, returning home from work just after midnight, wondering yet again what type of job he has. You really wished you were the type of person who was comfortable approaching people and be able to introduce yourself but you just weren’t and even if you were, you couldn’t just ask a complete stranger what they did for work, that would be rude. Of course, spying on your neighbours could also be considered rude and you sigh as you finally head to bed, telling yourself that you really should get out more.

The following morning as your heading off for work, you stop at the end of your driveway doing a double take as you catch sight of your neighbour standing at his door wearing nothing but his boxers as he accepts a parcel from a delivery man. You're standing there mouth agape when he spots you, gives you a wave and a wide grin before he turns going back in his house, closing the door behind him. Great! Now he was going to think you’re an idiot.

The brief interaction plays on your mind all day, preventing you from getting any work done, you can’t believe you just stood there staring at him. He was worth staring at though, slate grey skin, slender body but with strong looking arms and thighs, long fingers and big feet. You’re almost drooling picturing him when one of your colleagues leans against your desk later in the day, calling your name bringing you out of your thoughts.

‘‘Hey, a bunch of us are going for dinner and drinks after work, want to join us?’’ She asks, with a friendly smile.

‘‘I don’t know, I’m pretty tired,’’ you respond, leaning back in your chair. Not that you had any plans of actually sleeping in your bed with thoughts of your neighbour in your head.

‘‘Come on, we’re going to The Bears Den, it will be fun. That avian singer Violet is playing tonight and they have the best food this side of the city.’’

You consider it for a moment before agreeing, you had just told yourself you that needed to get out more after all. It may not be your usual scene but at least you’ll be out and may even have a good time, and if nothing else, you had been promised good food. Your bed would still be there when you get home.

The evening goes better than you expected, the food is delicious and when a pretty blue and yellow avian gets up on stage, you spend most of the evening on the dance floor. You even get hit on by the bartender which is a welcome confidence boost. It’s just after half eleven when you decide to call it tonight, the bar becoming uncomfortably busy for you. Saying goodnight to your colleagues, you head off outside to see if you can flag down a taxi.

After getting directions from the cute but overly tall, for your liking, orc doorman you head down the street in the direction of the taxi rank. Turning around a corner at the end of the street, you end up colliding with someone, knocking both them and yourself to the ground.

‘‘I am so sorry,’’ you say, picking yourself up off the ground and brushing yourself down. ‘‘Are you okay?’’

‘‘I’m fine.’’ A distinctively grumpy male voice responds, picking himself off the ground. ‘‘Hey! I know you,’’ he says as he stands.

‘‘Huh..,’’ you murmur as you look at him for the first time. Oh. Of course. Of all the people you had to run into, it just had to be your neighbour didn’t it, and now he’s eyeing you with interest, looking up at you curiously. Standing in front of you now you can see just how short he is, the tips of his ears just about reach the level of your breasts. ‘‘Um yeah… I’m your neighbour, I live opposite you…Hi,’’ you mumble, with a sheepish smile.

‘‘Right…’’ he says, nodding. ‘‘What you doing on this side of the city?’’ He asks, his eyes squinting suspiciously and his large nose crunching up in a manner you find adorable.

‘‘I… was having dinner and drinks at the bar down there,’’ you reply, pointing down the street.

‘‘Oh yeah? And how did you like your dinner?’’ He asks, one of his brows rising.

‘‘It was really good,’’ you respond confused. You were honestly starting to feel like you were being interrogated.

‘‘Yeah?’’ He says, a massive grin appearing on his face, flashing you his pointed and very sharp teeth. ‘‘I’m really glad to hear that.’’

‘‘Why?’’ You blurt.

‘‘It’s always flattering when a beautiful woman compliments your cooking,’’ he says smirking.

‘‘What?’’ You ask, feeling not only confused but flustered by the compliment. Did he just call you beautiful?

‘‘I’m the sous-chef at the Bears Den,’’ he chuckles. ‘‘Chef was off tonight though, so technically I was the chef.’’

‘‘Oh, well… it was really good,’’ you say, trying to hide your surprise. It wasn’t a job you expected a goblin to have but at least you have finally learned what he did for a living.

‘‘Good to hear,’’ he smirks. ‘‘Are you heading home now?’’

‘‘Yeah, I was just going to get a taxi.’’

‘‘Me too. You want to share one?’’ He asks, starting to walk towards the rank.

‘‘Sure,’’ you reply following him. Before asking, ‘‘Why don’t you drive your bike to work?’’

‘‘City parking is a nightmare,’’ he explains as you reach the taxi rank. Opening the door of the first text available, he gestures for you to get in first and you thank him with a smile. After giving the driver the address, he turns to you. ‘‘Names Iker, what’s yours?’’

Telling him, you watch as settles back in the seat beside you and try to eye him subtly. This close you can see details you missed before, like his eyes, which are black and look like bottomless pits. His large nose takes up most of his face, his lips thin and his claws are meticulously clean. You suppose working in a kitchen they would have to be and you wonder if he finds it difficult to work around the claws.

When your gaze travels back to his eyes, you catch him eyeing you in much the same manner but far less subtly. He spends an unreasonable amount of time staring at your legs, focusing on your thighs and you wonder what has him so captivated, you personally don’t think they are that great. When is gaze eventually meets your own he smirks at you brazenly.

‘‘What?’’ You ask him feeling nervous.

‘‘I’ve only ever seen you in passing before… I didn’t realise how pretty you are.’’

‘‘Oh. Thank you... You really think so?’’ You say, blushing. You can feel the heat in your cheeks and direct your attention out the window.

‘‘Yes… I take it you aren’t used to compliments?’’ He asks gently.

‘‘No, not really,’’ you say, shifting uncomfortably. You’d always thought yourself average, more girl next door, not someone who men gave a second look.

‘‘People are idiots, you’re gorgeous,’’ he says, ears wiggling.

‘‘Hmm… Tell me more about being a chef, how did you get into cooking?’’ You ask, trying to direct the conversation away from your looks.

He smirks, seemingly knowing what you are trying to do but fortunately he answers your question. ‘‘I’ve always enjoyed cooking, knew I wanted to be a chef forever. My parents tried to get me into banking of course but I rebelled. Went to culinary school and got a job straight after. Never regretted it.’’

‘‘And your parents?’’ You ask curiously.

‘‘They weren’t happy to begin with but they have come round now,’’ he replies, smiling. ‘‘What about you? What do you do for work?’’

You tell him about your job and how you ended up that field, watching as he listens attentively, his expressive ears often wiggling. Far too soon for your liking the taxi stops outside your house, and Iker pays the driver, refusing to take any money off you. Standing on the street, you both watch as the taxi drives off and then you stare at each for a moment.

‘‘Well thanks again, it was nice to meet you properly, finally,’’ you say, shuffling your feet.

‘‘You’re welcome,’’ he smiles.

‘‘Good night then, I’ll um… see you around I guess,’’ you giggle, slowing walking backwards towards your house.

‘‘I’m off work tomorrow night, I would like to take you out... if you’re interested that is?’’ He asks, watching your reaction carefully.

‘‘You would?’’ You blink, surprised.

‘‘Yes, definitely. I told you I think you’re gorgeous, why wouldn’t I want to take you out.’’ He says, smirking.

‘‘Oh. Well… Yes then. I’d really like that.’’

‘‘Great. I’ll pick you up at seven?’’ He asks with a chuckle.

‘‘Seven is good,’’ you reply nodding, and grinning stupidly. ‘‘Goodnight,’’ you add, as you make your way into your house. You hear him call goodnight behind you before you close your door and give a little dance in excitement. You’re not sure how you managed to wrangle a date with your cute neighbour but you did and you couldn’t be more elated.

The following day as you’re getting ready for your date, you realise you have absolutely no idea where Iker plans on taking you, so after some debate you end up dressing smart casual, in a black pleated skirt and a top you think compliments your eyes. Checking your reflection in the mirror, you give yourself a nod in approval, ready to go. Fortunately Iker is dressed similarly, but in dark jeans and a shirt, when he knocks on your door at seven on the dot.

‘‘You ready?’’ he asks, grinning widely.

‘‘I am, where are we going?’’ You ask curiously, spotting a taxi on the road behind him.

‘‘Into the city centre,’’ he says, opening the taxi door for you. When you’re sitting and the taxi takes off, he adds, ‘‘I thought we could to a comedy club but if you’re not into that I have other ideas.’’

‘‘What no, that sounds fun.’’

‘‘Great. My cousins doing a set tonight and he’s always fun to see,’’ Iker grins.

‘‘You’re cousins a comedian?’’ You ask surprised.

‘‘He likes to think he is,’’ he chuckles jokingly. ‘‘I know what you’re thinking and yes he’s another rebel in the family.’’

‘‘You’re family seems to be full of rebels,’’ you say laughing.

‘‘Oh, you have no idea,’’ he says smirking.

The comedy club is situated downtown, the area and the building a little run down, but the inside is nice, cosy and warm. You appear to have gotten there a bit early and get a table easily enough, you take a seat while Iker goes up to the bar to get the drinks. Looking around you see a varied mix of people, humans and creatures alike.

When Iker comes back with your drinks, he shifts his chair closer to yours and you sit heads together, having a quiet conversation until the first act comes on. The first act up is a female fairy and she is pretty funny, you and iker seem to find the same jokes amusing and you both chuckle along with the crowd. You don’t find the second guys jokes funny at all, most of them sexist and you’re glad when Iker doesn’t laugh at any of them.

Up last is Iker’s cousin, Gilles, who you do find funny. His jokes are punchy one liners and you find yourself laughing at a lot of them. You would have felt self conscious at laughing so loudly but you doubt you can be heard over Iker’s own. It’s definitely the best date you’ve been on by a mile and you’re really happy Iker brought you here. The fact you seem to have the same sense of humour is also a bonus.

You also notice that throughout the night Iker always finds a way to be in constant contact with you. Whether he has his hand on your knee or his arm around your back stroking your shoulder, he constantly touching you and you are in no doubt of his interest in you.

‘‘Your cousin was really good,’’ you say to Iker when Gilles set ends and he leaves the stage.

‘‘Yeah he’s alright,’’ he says grinning. ‘‘I don’t know where he gets it from though, no one else in the family is as funny as him.’’

‘‘Never wanted to get into comedy yourself?’’

‘‘Ha. No, I’m good at pranks but not so much with jokes.’’

‘‘Come on, you can’t be that bad,’’ you say smiling.

‘‘I really am.’’

‘‘Go on then, tell me a joke so I can judge for myself.’’

‘‘No, I’m awful,’’ he says still chuckling and shaking his head. When you just raise a brow at him he relents. ‘‘Well alright,’’ he sighs. ‘‘What do you call a goblin with an injured leg?’’

‘‘Hmm… I don’t know.’’

‘‘A hobblin’ goblin,’’ he says, straight faced.

‘‘Yeah that’s terrible,’’ you reply, chuckling at him.

‘‘I did warn you,’’ he says shaking his head again. ‘‘Fortunately I have other talents.’’

‘‘Oh? And what are these other talents?’’ You ask with a smile, expecting him to say cooking.

‘‘Cooking obviously and… well,’’ he smirks. ‘‘I can show you if you’d like,’’ he says, gesturing with his hand for you to come closer.

You lean towards him expectantly and he doesn’t disappoint, meeting you halfway to brush his lips across yours. One hand goes to your thigh as he turns more towards you deepening the kiss while he plays with your hair with the other. He tastes like the whiskey he’s been drinking and you moan when he pulls back giving you a smirk.

‘‘Mmm that wasn’t bad,’’ you say, licking your lips and his smirk becomes a toothy grin.

Gilles joins you for a drink soon after and Iker enthusiastically introduces you. You sit talking with Gilles, hyper aware that Iker’s hand remains on your thigh, kneading the flesh. Your deep in conversation listen as Gilles tells you the places he’s travelled to when you feel Iker’s hand climb higher up your thigh. Looking at him out of the corner of your eye, you see he isn’t engaged in the conversation at all. His eyes are your legs and you feel yourself flushing as his hand inches under your skirt.

Seeing Gilles isn’t paying any attention, happy to badger on while you smile and nod, you open your legs wider slighter allowing Iker to stroke the inside of your thighs. Looking around you make sure nobody is paying attention though you are pretty confident that Iker’s actions are concealed under the table. As his fingers climb higher, you wonder how far he’s going to take this and feel a thrill at the prospect of this happening so publicly.

You're soon disappointed when he stops inches from where you really want his hand to be. Looking at him again, you see his eyes are on your face and you almost exhale in relief when you realise that he’s just waiting for some sign of approval. Giving him a smile, you tilt your hips enough that hopefully he gets the message to continue, before going back to seemingly ignoring him. Thankfully he gets it and his hand climbs higher, stroking a finger over clit. You bite your lip to prevent a smirk when you feel him pause as he realises you’re not wearing any panties.

Your breath then hitches in your throat as his finger rubs across your clit teasingly before he inches his finger inside finding you wet. You can feel yourself dripping, no doubt soaking his hand and it takes sheer willpower not to roll your hips. Iker moves his fingers back to your clit rubbing in circles and you can’t help release a moan. Coughing to cover it, you pick your drink, sipping it cautiously while you risk at glance at Iker. Seeing him smirking as he watches your face, you shudder as he continues circling your clit relentlessly.

Fuck! You’re going to come. You’re so close, you can feel it building. The combination of his hand on you and the thrill of this happening in a room full of people, is far too much. Unfortunately Gilles chooses this moment to get up from the table and Iker withdraws his hand. Stopping yourself from cursing, you tell Gilles it was a pleasure meeting him and say goodbye.

‘‘Want to get out of here?’’ Iker asks breathlessly.

‘‘Yes please,’’ you say, more than ready to get out of here.

Both of you quickly rush out the building and quickly hail a taxi home. In the taxi you see Iker has gotten himself almost as worked up as you as there’s a prominent bulge in his jeans that wasn’t there before. You manage to restrain yourselves in the taxi but soon as you’re out of it, he pulling you towards his house, quickly unlocking the door.

‘‘You want anything to drink?’’ He asks, closing the door behind him.

‘‘No thank you,’’ you reply, pulling him towards you, for another kiss.

‘‘Bedroom?’’ You gasp questioningly, as the kiss becomes more heated.

Clothes get thrown everywhere as you hastily make your way to his bedroom, letting him lead the way. You see his cock is hard and while it isn’t particularly long he has an impressive girth that you know will stretch you beautifully. Lying completely naked on his bed you expect him to forego any more foreplay but he surprises when he kneels between your legs and licks at your slit. It surprises you even more when he moves to lie back on the bed and asks you to sit on his face.

‘‘Really? But I could crush you,’’ you say anxiously.

‘‘You won’t,’’ he says, shaking his head. ‘‘Please...’’

Hesitatingly you move to kneel over his head, clutching onto the headboard with your hands. He doesn’t give you long to worry, pulling you down to his mouth and licking at your slit again. You hear him moan as he takes your clit between his lips and starts to suck. To your embarrassment it doesn’t take him long to get you shaking and you soon reach your peak, squealing his name as you come.

‘‘That was exquisite,’’ he says moaning, as your body trembles above him.

‘‘Mmm,’’ you mumble agreeing, jumping in surprise when he nibbles on your thighs with teeth.

‘‘Want me to do it again?’’ He chuckles.

‘‘N-no,’’ you say feeling sensitive. With your body still shaking you gingerly move off of him. ‘‘It’s your turn now,’’ you say, as you take his cock in your hand feeling the weight of it before gripping it in your hand. Looking up you see him smirking, so you grip it tighter making him moan.

‘‘Well if you insist, I’m not going to argue.’’

You give the tip a lick before taking him into your mouth, moaning around his cock. He bends his knees up wrapping his hands around them with a moan as you press you finger against his perineum before circling it around his pucker.

‘‘Please,’’ he groans, as you continue to tease him, only entering just the tip of your finger.

Enjoying the sight of his writhing, shaking form as he struggles to buck up his hips desperately trying to get your finger further inside you hesitate, denying him. You snigger around his cock as he growls out his displeasure at being denied and you finally relent, easing your finger inside. His moans soon increase in volume as you continue sucking on cock and work one finger in and out his pucker. Finally he shouts in warning, which you ignore, before coming with a snarl, his face pinching in pleasure before going slack.

Moving a lie beside him, you stroke a hand down his thin chest while he regains his breath. He doesn’t speak for a long time and when he doesn’t reply when you ask if he’s okay, you look up to see him fast asleep. Chuckling, you think that sleep sounds good right about now and decide conversation can wait until morning.

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Thanks for reading! Let me know if you enjoyed it by reblogging it. Comments & likes are appreciated to.

My Masterlist

#exophilia #monster boyfriend #goblin #goblin/reader #monster/reader #goblin/human #My writing #My characters #series

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recentanimenews · 5 years ago

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KonoSuba Movie: Legend of Crimson – Megumin’s Homecoming

First of all, it’s been some time since I’ve seen Kazuma, Aqua, Megumin, and Darkness in their original non-chibified form, so it’s a rare pleasure to see them in their regular proportions and setting. KonoSuba’s twenty episodes proved you can make an often over-the-top isekai comedy with genuine heart.

If you liked the TV show, you’ll love the movie (as I did), which delivers more of everything. Though it contains roughly a half-cour’s worth of story, the ninety minutes just breeze by. Officially a sequel to KonoSuba 2, we return to Kazuma’s party’s mansion, where notoriously involuntary loner Yunyun has an unusual request: she wants—nay, must—make a baby with Kazuma. She comes to this belief upon receiving a letter from her father, Chief of the Crimson Demon Village.

While that letter turns out to be a work of fiction written by one of her academy classmates, Yunyun is nevertheless compelled to return to her hometown to help fight the forces of the Demon King. Megumin and the others decide to follow her, and rely on Iz to teleport them there.

Unfortunately, they end up far from the village, and in the midst of a stampede of rabidly horny she-orcs (there are no more male orcs) after Kazuma. After Yunyun’s request, this marks the second instance of Kazuma being entangled in romance (for good or ill) which he comes to call his “popular phase.”

What better way to learn more about Megumin than to visit her home? Turns out she’s hardly an anomoly, the town is nothing but overly-dramatic chuuni dressed in cool outfits with an emphasis on reds and blacks. The orcs are scattered by their overwhelming offensive magical power, a quality Megumin also shares with her clan.

Megumin’s parents are each eccentric in their own ways, while her little sister Komekko is adorable as all-get-out. Her family is poor, so the moment her parents smell money on Kazuma (he’s in the process of a 300m-Eris deal with Vanir to sell his memoirs), Kazuma finds himself at the mercy of a mother who wants to pair him with Megumin with all due haste.

To this end, she locks Kazuma and Megumin (sleeping due to a recent Explosion) in a room together. She comes to when he’s about to kiss her after much hand-wringing about how to proceed, and she escapes through the window to spend the night at Yunyun’s, fearing further lecherous advances.

The next day, Megumin shows her friends around the village, including to her and Yunyun’s (very Hogwarts-y) magical academy. We learn that when goblins attacked Komekko, Yunyun sacrificed her amassed skill points to repel the enemy. Because Megumin hesitated, that meant she was able to preserve her points and attain Explosion magic she cultivates to this day.

Megumin finds herself locked in her room with Kazuma again, this time by ice. Kazuma assures her that he won’t do anything, and offers his apologies as well as thanks for all the things she and the others have gone through with and for him.

It’s a very nice heartfelt scene, and Megumin even ends up clinging to Kazuma under the covers, commenting on how he’s really a “wimp” when it comes to making a move. Unfortunately, their tender moment is interrupted by the return of Sylvia, the voluptuous Demon King who leads the attack on the village.

Kazuma managed to scare her and her goblin army off with bluster earlier, but when she learns he’s not really Mitsurugi of the Cursed Sword, she takes him hostage…and Kazuma lets it happen. First, because it’s more proof of his Popular Phase; second, because it’s comfy between Sylvia’s boobs; and third, he has an ax to grind with his comrades regarding his treatment.

Kazuma accompanies Sylvia to the Crimson Demon Village’s underground storage facility, and inadvertently unlocks the chamber where Mage Killer, the one weapon he can’t let a demon king get ahold of, is stored. While he doesn’t intend to make things worse for the village, Kazuma’s so out of it he doesn’t realize punching in the classic cheat code on the Nintendo-style control pad would unlock the weapon.

He manages to lock Sylvia in the chamber, but once she has the Mage Killer and absorbs it into her artificial body, she blows the entire facility to kingdom come, then heads to the village to start blowing it up. Megumin leads Kazuma & Co. to more underground caverns, where they find Japanese carvings that explain the origin of the Crimson Demons, and why they’re so “pretentious yet nerdy”

Turns out their culture was basically created by another Japanese man sent there by the goddesses. He also built the Mage Killer, but also created a countermeasure for it: something he tentatively called “Railgun” that Kazuma previously noticed being used as a backyard clothesline in the village.

When Crimson Demons march out to defend their town, Sylvia engulfs them in an “Ancient Dispel” field that nullifies all of their magical power. They’re “saved” by a suddenly cool and confident Yunyun, finally taking up the mantle of her father the chief and luring Sylvia away.

Turns out she’s acting as a lure to bring Sylvia in firing range of the Railgun. Aqua fills it with magial energy, but it still fails to fire. That’s when Megumin unleashes an Explosion meant to his Sylvia directly, but is instead shunted into the rifle, which her little sister Komekko then fires.

Sylvia is killed, and ends up in the same place as fellow defeated Demon Kings Verdia and Hans. She merges with them an is resurrected into a huge, bizarre four-legged beast. Turns out her old comrades Wiz and Vanir have arrived in the village on an unrelated errand, and join in the fight, but even they are barely able to keep Sylvia at bay.

That’s when Kazuma decides to use his Popular Phase for good; by appealing to Sylvia’s innate need to be loved and wanted by somebody other than her adoring hordes of goblins. Kazuma, his luck boosted by Aqua’s blessings, is that person, and stands before her unarmed and ready to be taken into her arms…or tentacles…or whatever.

I never thought I’d empathize with a Konosuba villain so much, but Sylvia turns out to be one of the most dynamic and sympathetic of Demon Kings KonoSuba has served up. Her feelings, and specifically her romantic longing, isn’t entirely played for jokes, but portrayed as a very human side of her that turns out to be the Achilles Heel Kazuma must betray her heart to exploit.

He succeeds in gaining her trust and becomes one with her as Wiz gathers the magical energy from all of the villagers and transfers it to Megumin and Yunyun, who combine their powers to unleash a gargantuan Explosion beam that, combined with Kazuma breaking her heart, destroys Sylvia and ends the threat to the village for good.

Back home in Axel, Kazuma receives a hero’s welcome, proving his Popular Phase still has a bit left in the tank. While having a picnic with Aqua and Darkness, Megumin asks Kazuma to allow her to learn advanced magic, setting aside her Explosion magic so she can be of greater use to the party.

Kazuma may have long railed against her utter lack of versatility and durability in battle, but spending so much time in close quarters with her and meeting both her family and the villagers who shaped her, Kazuma suddenly isn’t so quick to deprive her of her “Explosiveness”. Whatever he does to her skill card, she’s still able to cast a beautiful Explosion that creates a heart-shaped cloud. And for that, Megumin is happy.

Did Aqua and Darkness get the short end of the stick in this movie? Perhaps, but that meant a lot of great development for Megumin, Kazuma, and their unique bond. They may get on each others nerves at times, but at the end of the day they’ll always be there for each other: Megumin blowing up something that needs blowing up, and Kazuma carrying her home on his back.

It’s quite simply KonoSuba at its absolute best, firing on all cylinders with confidence, comedy, and chemistry. My main gripe with this movie is that it makes me long that much more for KonoSuba 3!

By: sesameacrylic

#Anime #News #RABUJOI – An Anime Blog

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puppystorm · 5 years ago

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2020 20 facts tag thingy

Oh my Godzilla I was tagged in something by @goblin-gal-pal ?? Made my heckin day

1. Do you make your bed? I do some of the time but like, when we're getting in bed, because it's so damn cold, I have to ensure the blanket distribution is fair

2. Favorite number? I'm pretty fond of 707, my area code, and 21 is decent too, my current address but kind of a long time fav

3. What's your job? I'm not employed, but I'm the house mom/handydog for a bunch of useless lesbians

4. If you could, would you go back to school? Yeah, Academia suits me and I I'd learn forever if I could

5. Can you parallel park? Yeah I'm pretty confident about it, I'm the gay that can do math and drive

6. A job you had which would surprise people? Uhh, I haven't had many but I've done in home support for folks with special needs

7. Do you think aliens are real? Yeah, statistically? Definitely. But LGM who visit us? Nah

8. Can you drive a manual car? Yeah, I learned on my 4 gear (lmao) 71 VW Bus. I like driving manual and if I'm honest I probably shift my current automatic into neutral more than is maybe healthy just to get closer to that old feeling

9. What's your guilty pleasure? Definitely thrifting weird old junk for projects I don't have the time or energy for, or just really good deals sometimes

10. Tattoos? Just one. I've got plans for two or three more for sure though

11. Favorite color? Blues. I love that our eyes aren't especially good at perceiving blues because there's little value in being good at it, which means many of the blues we do see are actually way more vibrant than we can really pick up on, and it's so rare in nature, it's so special..

12. Things people do that drive you crazy? Honestly one of my pet peeves that I know isn't fair is like, forgetfulness. I mostly remember things just from hearing them once, and it's really hard for me to want to remind people of something they should know already according to my bad standard

13. Phobias? Oh! I was going to say nothing really but actually I'm quite sure I have cherophobia, fear of happiness, inasmuch as that when things are good for me, I get increasingly stressed because I feel like I have to be vigilant for whatever the horrible event that will "balance" things will be. I think that probably feeds into my pushing myself to always be a little bit stressed so I can't ever get fully happy? Which honestly makes me productive and I prefer that I think? It's complicated though

14. Favorite childhood sport? Oh, none. I tried street hockey and water polo (my older brother played) but I did not have a head for the rules and did not stick with them

15. Do it talk to yourself? Yeah definitely, I can even take a few perspectives

16. What movie do you adore? I gotta do a few. Nausicaa, Castle in the Sky, UHF, 2001, Back to the Future

17. Do you like doing puzzles? I like solving problems, I don't really like grinding against something tedious or overly obtuse

18. Favorite kind of music? I mostly listen to instrumental stuff, do people still call things electronica? Mild pop alt? Electro swing?

19. Tea or coffee? Coffee more often but both are okay. I make coffee for me and Chel as a ritual to start each day

20. First thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? A comedienne, actually, heh

Tagging people. Hmm... Sorry for hassling y'all but deal with it @annunakitty @bumblequinn @marrella-splendens @tabby-thetranswolfgirl

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uas-fics · 6 years ago

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Title: The Paramour Offer

Summary: “There is no love in a political marriage, Stan. So, what do you say? Be my paramour.” That's the offer made to him by his king and best friend's wife. It's an offer Stan wants to except so badly, but he can't betray Kyle like that. No matter what lies her majesty says about Kyle having lovers of his own.

Rating: T

Ships: Stenny, K2, Jyle, Kydi

Content Warning: Adultery, loveless marriage

Other: Technically this was part of Stenny-Week, but I didn't finish it in time. Also, the fact that mistress does not have a proper male version annoys me to no end since paramour doesn’t have the same...vibe as a mistress...but I digress

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2

~~~~

The breeze came as a welcome relief to the blistering summer heat. It rustled the leaves, shaking the shadows as the horses and their riders rode through the forest. Stan reached up and wiped his brow. The weather of the Human lands was hot and terrible. How the inhabitants withstood it, he will never know.

He glanced over his shoulder. The queen was not bothered in the least by the heat, though that shouldn't come as much of a surprise. These were her homelands, after all. She was used to the awful weather.

The light glinted off her golden hair as she rode, back straight and confidently. It was a wonder she didn't take the lead from Stan. She knew these woods far better than he did. She could have left the main traveling party on her own and been perfectly fine. That might have been her plan, in the beginning, had Kyle not told her she had to bring an armed guard with her if she wished to travel off the main road, or he wouldn't allow it.

Feeling his eyes on her, she flashed a smile.

Stan snapped his head forward again, feeling the tips of his ears warm with embarrassment. The queen seemed too friendly with everyone, but with Stan in particular. He'd brought the issue up with his majesty a few times, but Kyle always shrugged him off and told him not to worry about it.

"That's just how she is. It is better having her as a friend than an enemy, after all," Kyle had wistfully told him.

The clopping of horse hooves stole Stan's attention to his side. The queen rode up next to him.

"So, how do they compare?" She asked.

"'Compare'?" He echoed.

The queen gestured to the trees. "The forests. How do they compare to the Elven Forests?"

Stan looked around. Of course, the forests here were not nearly as magnificent as back home. The trees didn't tower overhead and block out the sky completely. Their roots didn't dig down deep into the rich earth and their trunks didn't grow wide as ten men standing shoulder to shoulder. In comparison, Human forests were just plain and dull.

"They're nice."

The queen tilted her head a moment. "Really. I think they're boring compared to yours — I suppose I should say ours, shouldn't I?" She chuckled into her gloved hand. "It's still so strange not to be considered solely a Human ruler."

Stan pointed to his ears as he spoke. "You aren't Human, though. If anything, you have more of a claim to our throne than theirs."

The queen mulled over that then shrugged. "What is a half-orc - half-elf than a Human anyway?"

Stan could not argue with that. Instead, he changed the topic. "So, the wedding we're heading towards. Are Human ceremonies all that different from Elven ones?"

"Less dancing and glass smashing, but more food and drunk relatives. Other than that, they're pretty much the same."

Stan nearly pointed out that a lot of the traditions that happened at her wedding to Kyle were distinct to High Elves like the Broflovski family, and not to all Elves but decided not to bother.

She let out a dreamy sigh. "I've been waiting for this wedding to happen for so, so long!" She continued. "Craig and Tweek are soulmates. I'm so very excited for them and can't wait to give them my congratulations!"

"I see," Stan responded before clicking to his horse to trot a few paces ahead of the queen. "If you are so excited, why not stay with King Kyle. It would be a lot faster if we had traveled in a large group instead of just to two of us."

"Are you implying you do not enjoy my company, Stan?" The queen put her hand to her mouth in shock. "I'll have you know even after my poor course of actions during the war, I am still quite beloved by the country people." She snorted, urging her horse to keep up with Stan's. "If I want to take the long way and stop by some villages and speak with the common folk and hear their woes, I have every right."

"Of course, your majesty," Stan replied automatically. He knew from his years as Kyle's bodyguard it was sometimes better to just agree with the ramblings of royalty.

"Besides," she went on as if he hadn't spoken, "we are two days away from the main traveling party. It's not as if we were sorely missed when we were away."

Stan raised an eyebrow. "Oh, I'm sure his majesty missed you greatly, my queen. I see how much he adores you."

"I...I'm sure he has." The queen's face fell for a fraction of a second before she perked up again with a smirk on her face. "Who wouldn't? I am the most lovely creature in all the lands." She threw her hair over her shoulder. "Don't you agree?"

Only half to pacify her, Stan nodded. A laugh escaped her lips and she continued talking, though Stan only half listened.

He took a moment to eye her over. He couldn't say she wasn't unattractive: long, gold hair tied back in a braid, bright blue eyes, a neatly trimmed beard, a face that wasn't the extreme of too sharp like King Kyle or too round like the Wizard King's. She was lean, but not overly so, with a slight waist and palpable aura of grace and elegance.

By both Human and Elven standards, she was beautiful.

Before she could catch him staring at her a second time, Stan turned his thoughts and eyes back to the path before them. If they hurried, they could make it to the next village before the sun set.

After another hour of travel, the queen forced her horse to a sharp stop.

"Do you smell that?" She sniffed.

Worry saturated her voice.

"Smell what?" Stan sniffed the air. He smelled the sweat of their mounts and the distant burning of fires but nothing to concern himself with.

Her mouth fell into a line. "I smell blood."

"What?" Stan gasped. "How? I don't smell a thing."

The Queen carefully urged her horse forward, past Stan. "Orc." She pointed to her nose then sniffed again, "It's a lot of blood, too. A slaughter."

"Maybe the village got word of our coming and is preparing a feast? Perhaps the blood is from livestock?" Stan offered. The last villages they had visited did the same the moment they heard that a queen was in their presence.

The queen shook her head. She said no more. Instead, she slid from her mount, then took the bow from her back and readied an arrow.

Stan's stomach twisted as he pulled his sword from its sheath. The queen had instincts he never truly understood, but after fighting with her and against her in the war, he knew well it was best to trust her.

He jumped off his horse before taking the reins and tying it to a nearby branch. The Queen patted her horse on the muzzle, her eyes flashing purple, as she told it to stay put.

The two crept forward down the road; their bodies tense. The woods had gone deadly quiet. The birds no longer chirped nor an insect buzzed. Not even the light breeze stirred the trees.

The heavy silence sent goose flesh across Stan's skin. The queen was right. Only fear drove forest creatures to such quietness.

Suddenly, a scream pierced the silence. Without wasting a second, the two dashed forward.

Around a bend in the road, they came across a gruesome sight. Blood seeped into the earth. The corpses of at least five Humans laid piled into a haphazard heap. In the middle of the village square, a cage had been set up made of branches and fraying rope. The cage itself looked feeble. Even one of the children cowering inside could easily destroy it, and if not for the hobgoblins keeping guard outside, one of them probably would have. the rest of the hobgoblins ran in and out of homes, carrying away food, blankets, and other valuables.

Stan moved to attack, but the queen held up her hand to his chest. She raised a gloved finger and pointed forward.

A large creature stood, barking orders to the hobgoblins. Thick, matted fur covered its body. Its paws were large and clawed, like a bear, with an upturned pig-like snout on its ugly face. It stood upright, like a man, on its hooved feet.

"What is that?" Stan whispered.

"An ugly son of a bitch," The queen answered, eyes narrowing. "’Man-bear-pig.’ That's what they call it in these woods, but you would probably know it better as a 'bugbear'."

"A bugbear?" Stan took a breath.

Oh, he'd heard of bugbears. They were goblins of the Human lands, bloodthirsty and wild creatures who kidnapped children and destroyed villages. This one lived right up to its kin's reputation.

The queen raised her bow. "If I can hit its head or heart, I can kill it."

Stan nodded, readying his blade. The queen's aim was not one to be doubted, but even if they defeated the bugbear that easily, they still had all the hobgoblins to deal with next.

The queen began to mutter under her breath. Magic sparkled at the tip of the arrow. The moment she let loose the arrow, the tip burst into flames.

The arrow shot forward, digging deep into the bugbear's shoulder. It let out an ugly cry of pain. Its claws slapped at both the flames and the arrow.

Without wasting a heartbeat, Stan rushed forward, his sword raised. With a cry, he slashed down at the bugbear.

The bugbear roared, grabbing his blade between his thickly padded paws. Stan glowered at it before thrusting his foot forward into the monster's belly.

The bugbear stumbled back, blood oozed from its shoulder and its paws. The air stunk of burnt hair.

The queen ran from her cover, bow already firing at the lesser goblins. One of her arrows hit one straight through the eye. A burst of rainbow colored magic expanded from the arrow. The magic wrapped around two nearby hobgoblins and pulled them all into a tight squeeze until the sickening ‘snap’ of neck bones came could be heard. The magic dissipated and three hobgoblins slumped into a dead heap.

Seeing their comrades fall dead, the other hobgoblins froze. They exchange quick looks before turning heel and dashing into the forest.

"I suppose some goblins do have brains in their heads." The queen scoffed, darting past Stan and the bugbear to the cage.

The bugbear let out a low, rumbling growl, turning to attack the queen when Stan slashed forward. His blade bit into its side.

The bugbear turned back its full attention to Stan, swiping forward with its sharpen claws. Stan danced away as the monster came at him. It dove forward. Stan lept to the side, but he wasn't quick enough.

A strangled cry escaped his lips as the bugbear dug its teeth into the flesh of his calf. Gritting through the pain, Stan raised his sword to attack. The bugbear shook his head suddenly to the side then threw out its arm. It smacked the blade from Stan's hands.

The blade hit the ground and skidded over to the queen. She looked up from the cage, and fear crossed her features.

"Stan!" She cried out, but Stan didn't dare waste any energy responding to her.

The bugbear grunted as its teeth sunk deeper and deeper into the muscle. Stan hit against its thick skull with his fist and tried to pull away, but the bugbear was too strong.

He pulled his free leg back enough to be able to kick the creature in the side of the head, but the attempt did nothing but anger the bugbear more.

"Let him go, you disgustingly shitty wretch!" The queen's voice echoed around the village with both rage and authority. Before either the bugbear or Stan could respond, the queen hurled herself forward, blade in hand.

With a cry of rage, she pierced the sword straight into the bugbear's chest. The monster roared out in pain, finally releasing Stan's leg.

Stan scrambled away, thankful of the adrenaline to do so. An inHuman snarl came from the queen's lips as she twisted the blade in before forcing it deeper. Bones cracked and blood dripped from the bugbear's mouth and out its snout. It heaved and sputtered with unseeing eyes bulging from its head before it stiffened up and lay limp and lifeless.

The queen spat on its matted fur. "Pathetic creature. I'll have to convince Eric to do something about these backward when I get to the castle."

Stan opened his mouth to thank her, but instead, a gasp came out. He clenched his bitten leg between shaking hands.

"Stan!" the queen gasped, falling to her knees. "Oh, by the gods!" Her hands hovered over him unsure. After a few heartbeats, she swung her head up and yelled to the villagers, "Is one of you a doctor? A healer? Please! He's hurt!"

The sound of hurried footsteps neared them. Someone hovered close. They said something, but the pain made it impossible for Stan to focus. Gentle hands took his hands from his wound. He tried to put them back, but the hands held firm.

The tingle of healing magic flitted across his skin and the pain began to wane.

"Stan? Stan, how are you feeling?" He heard the queen ask.

He groaned in reply.

"Good. Rest now. I promise it'll be alright."

Stan did not argue with that order.

~~~~~~

His leg still ached when he woke, but the pain dulled down to an unpleasant thudding in time with his heartbeat. His head was fuzzy with the after effects of mediocre healing magic. He let out a loud moan and rolled his head to the side. A thick blanket covered him as he laid on a cot.

He wanted to push the blanket off and check his wound, but his limbs felt like lead, and he was so, so comfortable under it.

Just as he drifted back off, the door opened and a beautiful woman came in. She looked, but he couldn't quite remember who she was. A few flirtatious remarks drifted up, but they were so jumbled together, he couldn't pick one away to say to her. She just was so pretty.

"Can I kiss you?" he muttered, eyes dropping back down, the woman heard him and gasped a little. She said something, stroking his hair from his face, but Stan had already fallen back asleep.

~~~

"You won't be able to travel for another day," the healer told Stan with a frown the next afternoon. "I'll lend you a staff to walk with, but riding is out of the question until tomorrow."

Stan groaned, stretching out his bandaged calf. Of all the towns he could have gotten hurt in, it had to be the one where the magical healer had only a year and a half experience at his craft. Stan had much worse wounds magically healed in half the time during the war.

"Where is her majesty?" Stan took the staff and hauled himself up. He choked down a gasp of pain. The healer held their hands out, but Stan waved them away. "I'm fine. Where is she? I'm her guard. It's my job to keep her safe."

The healer frowned. "Outside, last I saw. She was speaking — somehow — with a crow to deliver a message. The children are very interested in her."

"She is a very interesting person," Stan said more to himself than the healer. The crow must have to been sent alert Kyle what happened and that they would arrive later than expected.

Stan took only a few steps outside the healer's home to find the queen sitting in a small patch of grass with a ground of young children gathered around her. Some women sat nearby, half keeping an eye on the children and half talking amongst themselves.

The queen weaved some flowers into a crown while a gaggle of little girls circled behind her attempting to fix a messy braid.

"There we go," the queen set the crown on a child's head. The child let out a cry of excitement and burst out of the crowd towards a woman with an infant on her knee. A few more broke off from the crowd to follow the first child.

"If you bring me more flowers, I'll make anyone else who wants a crown too." the queen smiled at the children.

"I'll get some!"

"Me, too! Me too!"

Four children turned on their heels and darted away to fetch some flowers, much to the amusement of the onlooking women.

With a gap in the crowd, Stan stepped forward.

"Your majesty? Is all well?" He asked. All the children turned to him with wide eyes.

"Wooow, he's the guy who helped kill the man-bear-pig!" one whispered.

"He's an elf! A real-life elf! Lookit, his ears!" Said another.

The queen clapped her hands. "Children, may I introduce the captain of the royal guard, a friend of wolves and badgers, slayer of ogres and bugbears, and a mighty hero of the war, Stanley Marshwalker."

Stan had a feeling she introduced him so extravagantly to draw some of the attention away from herself.

One child darted forward, tugging on Stan's shirt. "Lean down! Lean down! I wanna touch your ears!"

Another grabbed his pant leg. "Can I see your sword? Where is it? I wanna use it! I wanna be a hero."

Soon, it seemed as if the queen became the least interesting person in the whole village as all the children gathered around Stan. The women laughed but did not rush to Stan's aid. The queen rolled her wrist in a 'go-on' gesture.

"Distract them." She mouthed, eyes darting towards the town square, where the rest of the village was still cleaning up after the events of yesterday. The bugbear along with its fallen had been piled atop a stack of wood. The monsters head, however, had been cut off and a thick stick stabbed through its neck. The village would leave it somewhere as a deterrent to other bugbears.

A pang of pity hit his chest. He'd seen villages ravaged by war where children wore hopeless faces, unable to forget the horrors that they'd seen.

"Um, alright," Stan stooped down, still holding tight to the staff, then pushed his hair back behind his ears. "You may look, but don't--"

A flurry of small hands grabbed hold of his pointed ears and yanked him to his knees.

"Wow! Woooow! They're so pointy! Pointy point!" Someone bent back the point of his left ear.

"Do you hear better than people do? Hello! Helloooo! Mr. Elf can you hear me?!" A child shouted right into his eardrum.

"Can you move them like my puppy does?" yet another pinched his ear lobe and tugged on it.

"Oh, no, no, no!" The queen jumped to her feet. She as well as the women peeled the children away from Stan, leaving him dazed on the ground and clenching the staff with white knuckles. He would have rather fought the hobgoblins than deal with that ever again.

The queen bent forward. "Stan? Are you alright."

"What?" He reached up to rub the ear that had been shouted in. "Give me a minute."

The adults scolded the children as the ability to hear returned to him. Most of them did not look all that apologetic. Several were pulling at the tops of their ears instead of listening. He took deep breaths, then stood, careful to keep his weight off the bad leg.

"Sorry," the queen whispered. "I should have known they would do that."

"No, it's fine. I was just surprised is all," Stan whispered back. He took another breath, stepping forward. He said over the din, "I'm guessing none of you have seen an elf?"

The children spun around, instantly moving their attention from the adults back to Stan.

"No! Never!" said one.

"I saw one once," claimed another.

"That was just a weird shaped tree, and you know it!" a third accused.

Stan breathed a laugh and shook his head. "If someone finds me a chair to sit on, I can tell you all about us."

Soon enough, Stan settled down into a rickety chair, thankful to be off his injured leg. About that time, the children who ran off to find flowers returned with their arms full of blooms and leaves. The queen sat off to the side, continuing to weave flower crowns as Stan started taking questions.

Thankfully, all of them were silly questions that proved none of these children had been more than two miles outside of their home village and nothing outrageous.

"Can Elves only eat vegetables?"

"Some do, but we don't have to."

"Is it true you can talk to trees?"

"I can't, but I know some priests who do."

"Can you move your ears? Do you hear better?"

"Only a little, and, yes, I can hear noises from farther away than you could."

"Do all Elves use magic?"

"Do all Humans?"

The answer to that final question sent a wave of understanding across the children's faces. They began to murmur amongst themselves.

The queen chuckled into her hand then sent him a smile that made his stomach flip. Moving to hide his ears behind his hair, he turned his attention back to the crowd. At this point, some of the older children had taken a break from helping the adults to stand at the edges of the crowd.

One whispered to another, and the grin of pure mischief that only teenagers can manage crossed her face.

"I have a question." The teen asked, snorting, "Do, uh, heh-heh, do Elf men have the same, ah, stuff as Human men? You know, uh, down — down there?"

At this point, she and her friend doubled over, leaning against each other for support. Several of the adults shouted the teens' names reprimandingly as the younger children exchanged confused expressions.

Stan's ears twitched in embarrassment, escaping from behind his hair, and showed off how pink they were. He scrambled to find an answer that wouldn't offend the adults or tip off the children to what the question meant.

"Well, of course, everything is the same," The queen quipped, holding up her final flower crown. "How would there be half-elves like myself otherwise?" She set the crown on a toddler’s head to adjust it. "Though it was my mother who was the elf, not my father, but the principle is the same."

Stan sighed with relief. The growing crowd of adults taking lunch settled down as the two teenagers who asked the question where led away for a talking to. Neither one seemed all that apologetic.

Another teen, this one wearing a surly expression, pushed closer, then loudly, and rudely, asked, "You're half-orc, aren't you? My mom says that's why you did what you did during the war because orcs are power thirsty and ugly. Mom says that you're a half-orc, and daughter of a runaway Elf queen. Is that true? Is that why you stole the relic during the war?"

The queen flinched back but quickly recomposed herself with a simple, disapproving frown. The adults and teenagers in the crowd gasped, several shouting apologies to the queen for the teen's behavior. An adult gripped the teen's arm in a white-knuckled grasp.

"Young man! These two saved our lives, show some respect!" The adult snapped, glancing warily at the queen. "Farther more--"

"I have a question for you, young sir," the queen cut in, speaking in a tone so overly polite and sweet, that Stan shuddered.

The surly teen shrugged off the adult holding him and stood with his arms crossed, waiting for her question.

The queen stood, brushing off her skirts, then carefully picked her way through the children. As she neared, the teen's bravery wavered and he sunk back into himself ever so slightly.

With a pleasant smile, the queen crouched down just enough that she and the teen were looking at each other in the eye.

"Do you know what the saying Ni ukhould noav ukpeak abouav whaav ni doeuk noav know, leukav avrolluk ukaveal hiuk aveeavh means in common tongue?" She reached up and pinched his cheek. "It's a mouthful, I know, but it roughly translates 'One should not speak about what one does not know, lest trolls steal his teeth.'"

The queen flashed a wicked smile, her eyes flaring purple with magic. She squeezed his cheek tight between her fingers once then stood up straight. The teen's stumbled back, holding his face, looking terrified.

"Many people did many things during the war they are not proud of; I am no exception," She announced. "But if your mother so wishes it, I'd be willing to explain to her, in full detail, the corrupting effects of centuries-old tainted magic. Though I will admit now, they are less than pleasant."

A woman a few steps from the teen cringed and shirked back behind another woman, who looked at her with disapproval — the surly teen's mother, no doubt.

Folding her hands in front of her, the queen requested Stan to escort her back to the healer's home.

"I'm a bit tired from all that weaving," she explained, waiting for Stan to stand up and follow her back. The adults went right to scolding the teen as the children whined about the queen and her Elf guard leaving them. The queen did not pay them any mind.

~~~~~~

The healer's house had three rooms, two of which were divided into two smaller rooms. The front room held the hearth and was where the healer did their work, the other was a large storeroom for their magic and medical supplies, as well as their food stores, and the third was divided into individual bedrooms.

The queen's room was the larger of the two with a big goose down mattress sitting atop of cot. the queen herself sat down on the mattress, staring out the window into the town square to watch the crowd she had amassed dissolve.

Stan leaned against his staff, chewing his lip. Should he say something? That final question stung her. It was well known amongst the nobility to never speak of the queen's Orc heritage nor her mother's abandonment of the kingdom.

He wished the royal bard, Jimmy, had come with them. Jimmy could make Kyle laugh until he had a belly ache. He would be perfect for helping the queen’s mood, but Jimmy always stayed with Kyle on trips, just in case some foreign dignitary or custom caused Kyle’ anger to flare and their king needed to cool his head before he did something regrettable.

Stan was alone in this endeavor.

He took a breath. "Your majesty, may I ask you a question?"

"If you fucking have to," The queen grumbled, dropping her royal dignity to swear.

"That spell you used yesterday, to light the arrow, where did you learn it?" He sat next to her on the mattress. She blinked and looked up, surprised that the question wasn't about what had happened outside.

"Oh, that? A simple fire starter spell." She explained. "Heidi taught it to me."

This was a positive topic Stan could use to lift the queen's spirits. Heidi Turner was a Human sorceress that the queen brought with her to the Elf Kingdom upon her marriage to Kyle. She spoke very highly of the magic user, praising her as the best in all of Zaron.

"She's very impressive. Didn't you say she trained under The Wizard King?" Stan planted his staff between his feet and leaned against it.

The queen chuckled. "That's exactly why I took her with me. It made Eric so pissed, I was sure he was going to push me off the top of the castle barracks."

Stan furrowed his brow but snorted a laugh anyway. "Really? Was she that special to him?"

"Special is an understatement. I think he wanted to marry her, but," the queen shrugged, "Eric is a douchebag, no offense to His Majesty, King Douchebag, of course. Once she started to surpass him in skill, he got so enraged about it, he actively tried to sabotage her studies. I couldn't have such a bright light go out, after all--and the look on his face when I told him I had Heidi studying with the best Elven magic users was priceless! He looked so red like he hadn't taken a dump in a year!"

"You took her with you just to spite him?" Stan chuckled. "How do you think The wizard king will react to when you tell him that Heidi and Kyle are working closely on a magical project?"

Stan didn't know much about Kyle and Heidi's project, except that it involved the mixing of Human magical tradition and Elven, but he did know that the two had become very good friends since the project began.

More than once, Kyle had sent Stan from his guard post outside the royal library to fetch an obscure ingredient for their experiments, only to come back to find them joyfully sharing a chuckle.

"I don't think I've ever met a Human as smart and funny as she is," Kyle told Stan once with a deep fondness in his voice.

In his mind's eye, Stan could almost see the Wizard King explode knowing that his ex-lover and his hated rival king were such good friends.

He smiled at the queen, expecting her to be smiling at her own mental image, but instead, her face deadpanned and she looked down at her hands.

"Yes. I'm sure he will not be pleased in the lease," She said slowly, "at how close Heidi and Kyle are."

Shutting her eyes, she told Stan to leave her be for the time being. Guilt gnawed at his stomach but Stan did as he was told.

At the door, he paused a moment to say, "You're a wonderful queen, your majesty, regardless where you come from."

~~~~~

Later that evening, Stan lay on the cot in his room, a bowl of stew nearly finished in his lap. According to the healer, he should be able to ride by tomorrow morning. If they didn't take any unneeded stops, the queen and he could easily make it to the castle in Kupa Keep before nightfall.

A knocking came from the door before the queen poked her head in.

"Your majesty, is everything all right?" Stan straightened up in his bed.

"Well, yes, but also, no." She wrapped her shawl around her shoulders and crept in, shutting the door behind her. "I have a request."

"Anything," Stan replied, trying not to focus on her chamise's low neckline. Without her corset on, he could see a little more than he felt comfortable with. As he banished any less-than-noble thoughts from his mind, the queen took a seat on the stool next to the bed.

"May I sleep with you tonight?"

Stan nearly choked on his meal. He coughed, beating his chest for a minute, then turned a wide-eyed stare at the queen.

"Excuse me?"

"You see, this room does not have a window, while mine does. Some teenagers kept coming to spy on me all last night, and as tempting as it is to blast magic right in those little shithead's faces, I would rather not give anyone any more reason to dislike me than they already seem to," she explained.

Stan gritted his teeth, looking around. "Where is my sword. I'll teach them how rude that is."

The queen put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him back down. "No need for that. Just let me stay here with you in your room."

Stan pressed his lips into a line but nodded regardless. He made a move to leave the cot for the floor, but the queen shook her head.

"No, no, I can bring my own bedding in."

A half hour later, the queen sat down on her own cot that she set up parallel to Stan's.

Stan asked, "Are you sure you don't want one of these blankets?"

"I'm fine," The queen reassured.

"Of course, you're majesty." Stan bent himself in a half bow from his bed.

The queen frowned at him. "You can call me by my name. I know you call Kyle by his."

Since their shared childhood, Kyle had been Stan's best friend. Their bond was close as brothers, while Stan could only call the relationship between him and the queen friendly at best.

"Is that an order?" Stan asked.

The queen hummed. "Yes, I think it is. You have to call me 'Kenny' when we are alone together, understand?"

"As you wish, your maj — Kenny," Stan corrected.

Kenny smiled at him, her eyes twinkling. The tips of his ears heated up. Stan turned his head away from her and pretended to scratch the scalp right above the tip of his ear so she couldn't see.

She was so lovely. Kyle was a lucky, lucky Elf. Sometimes he wished Kyle had passed on the offer to marry her so Stan could have attempted to court her. He had enough noble blood in him, along with his achievements as a war veteran, to have attempted with no complaints that he was overstepping his bounds — not that it mattered at this point.

"One more request, Stan." Kenny swung her legs off the cot. "Would you mind if I removed my glamour?"

Stan furrowed his brow, turning back towards her. "You have a glamour spell on?"

Of course, Stan was no magic user, but he could usually detect basic illusionary spells well enough, especially at such short range. Perhaps Kenny's natural magical aura drowned it out, he thought.

She smiled sheepishly. "Yes, I'm afraid so. Maintaining it without thinking is second nature after all the years I've done it, but I do like to give it a rest every now and again."

"Of course you can. I don't care." Stan told her, trying to keep the curiosity out of his voice.

Kenny clasped her hands together with a grin. "Lovely. Thank you!"

The next moment, the queen changed. The hair on her arms and shoulders grew thicker and wiry, like bronze wire. Her bottom canine teeth poked out over her top lip and her muscles became more defined.

Her natural strength was so evident, that Stan couldn't help but to admire her. She might not have met the beauty standards set by Elves or Humans, but she was starting to meet all of his.

"That's better." She stretched then caught Stan's gaze on her. She cocked her head coyly to the side. "Enjoying the view?"

"Yeah," Stan replied instantly. "I mean, you look as radiant as ever. I don't see why you keep it on."

A sad smile crossed her lips. "Well, that's one person who thinks that."

"Two. His majesty must think so, too," Stan pointed out.

She barked a laugh. "Oh, no, he does not. He actually becomes quite uncomfortable when I remove my glamour around him."

Kyle was many things, but shallow enough to tell his wife to hide her true face because he didn't like it, he was not. And if he was, he would have told Stan about it.

"But he loves you." Stan shook his head. "That doesn't make sense."

"There are many kinds of love, Stan." She stood and went to stand over him. Kenny tilted her head at him, something soft in her gaze that made Stan's heart thump loudly against his ribcage. She leaned down and kissed his cheek.

"What Kyle and I have isn't the love you think it is," she whispered into his ear.

Not just Stan's ears went red this time. His whole face was the color of a fresh strawberry as the queen pulled back, but not entirely, out of his personal space. She lifted her knee onto the cot so it brushed against Stan's side.

"I don't—"

"I admire Kyle as a friend and a leader, and as far as I know, he admires me the same way, but we don't love each other, not like that. I don't think we could ever see the other in that way."

"But..." Stan puttered out, his head spinning. Before he could speak another word, Kenny placed a hand on his cheek and stroked under his eye with her thumb.

"You, on the other hand, I can see with me in many ways." She pressed her lips to his forehead as she spoke. He could feel her lower canines against his skin, and he didn't dislike it.

"There is no love in political marriages. So what do you say? Will you be my paramour?"

Stan's mouth gaped open and shut like a freshly caught trout. It was hard to breathe, and his body felt like it was melting from the heat. A heavy, guilty, enthusiastic 'yes' sat on his tongue, pushing against his teeth to get out. He swallowed it down. It tasted bittersweet.

"I...I can't," Stan stammered. "You're my best friend's wife. I can't do that to him." Stan put a firm hand on her shoulders and pushed her back. "And I can't believe you would do that to him. You took a vow!"

"Keep your voice down!" Kenny looked over her shoulder towards the door. "I'm not doing anything Kyle isn't already."

Stan narrowed his eyes. "Are you implying my king is an adulterer?"

"I'm not implying; I'm confirming." She readjusted her shawl. "He had lovers well before I was married off to him by Eric. Jimmy and Heidi, both."

Stan shook his head. Of course, he knew Kyle and Jimmy had gotten particularly close when Stan left for training when they were teenagers, and that Kyle and Heidi spent many hours studying and comparing the magic of their two peoples, but Kyle wasn't in love with either them.

If he was, he would have told Stan for sure. He always told Stan his secrets.

"I'm going to sleep. Let’s not speak of this again." Stan laid down. He yanked the blankets out from under Kenny's knees to pull over his head. "Good night, your majesty. Sleep well."

Kenny heaved a sigh. "Not as well as we could have, my dear."

~~~~~~

AN: The Orcish Translator I used

Next update should be in a week, next Sunday.

#south park #stenny #jyle #kydi #k2 #fanfiction #dual shot #stick of truth #sot #stan marsh #kenny mccormick #kyle broflovski #Jimmy Valmer #Heidi turner

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qualityfanfiction · 8 years ago

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(Labyrinth) Junior Editor in the City - KBates

“The story line is great. Twenty two year old, shy, quiet, receptionist calls on some fictional king to take her much younger brother. She runs his…labyrinth…that may be too complicated a word for New Adult. Let’s go with maze. Anyway, the heroine runs his maze—shags him many times along the way. He sends her brother back. Some gorgeous, bitchy exes make her sad. He tells them to fuck off. She marries him---I’d make her pregnant by the end of it for good measure. New Adult readers love pregnancy.”

Confession bear time: after a year or so of exploring the fandom, the Labyrinth fanfic world isn’t really my favorite. I mean, there’s something enticing about the world of Labyrinth, to be sure. What young girl wouldn’t want to be swept off her feet by the devilishly sexy king of a magical realm? But a lot of the fanfics have...I don’t know. Annoyingly virginal, naive, bratty Sarah. A Jareth that crosses the line between creepy and hot one time too many. Too much Underground and overly detailed descriptions of dresses and fae politics and... meh. So it’s not really my cup of tea, but it’s still an interesting fandom with many high-quality stories.

And then there’s Junior Editor in the City, a hilarious fic that turns all the tropes on their heads. Mostly. Sarah’s a gorgeous, confident, feminist, elitist af (author’s description, not mine) junior editor of romance novels living in New York. She has one of the best OC’s I’ve ever encountered in a fanfic for a boss: a cynical, snarky, gay editor named Sanjay who’s a gleeful capitalist and has given up on all humanity. Their conversations about romance novel tropes give me life. I especially adore Sanjay’s takedown of Sarah mid-way through the fic concerning how privileged her existence is.

Enter Jareth. Sarath accidentally wishes for a Goblin King reference to assist with her Labyrinth-inspired romance novel, and Jareth is more than willing to provide help. Their interactions are fantastic...until Jareth starts to get mega-jealous of other men before they’ve even started dating. Until he uses the presence of other women to get revenge on Sarah towards the end of the fic (ugh, not this again).

To give the fic some additional credit: I have a feeling that it’s really hard to do Labyrinth right. My read on the Jareth/Sarah ship is that it’s all about power plays and dominance: Jareth is a zillion years older than Sarah, has crazy magical powers, has a very sexually confident personality...Sarah is quite the opposite, and yet still somehow his “equal.” And this intriguing juxtaposition is what draws people to to this fandom. But it’s really hard to write that balance, I’d imagine. Give Jareth too much power, and Sarah becomes too submissive and boring. Give Sarah too much power, and it doesn’t quite match the tone of the movie and becomes its own thing altogether. So I get it; it’s hard. And at the end of the day, Junior Editor in the City is still a fantastic, entertaining read, especially at the meta level.

Summary: Jareth decides to help Sarah write a romance novel. About himself. Chaos ensues.

Link

#labyrinth #fanfiction #batesybates #jareth #sarah #jareth/sarah #complete #meta #romance novels #funny

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turnonthesubtitles-blog · 8 years ago

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What to Watch Next: 10 Solid Drama & Film Recommendations

I wanted to come up with a list of dramas that don’t often get recommended. They may be older, or more obscure, or have just been overshadowed by the flashy “Goblin-like” productions to become hits in recent years. With that said, these are all fantastic choices that promise a variance of good drama experiences. They are all reasonably accessible and have solid performances, and while I can be rather picky, I look upon these ones fondly and they are certainly worth a rewatch or a first viewing.

**In no particular order**

Back to 1989 (Taiwanese Drama, 2016)

A bit of a sleeper hit from 2016, this one may have been overlooked by some for its episode length, topping out at an hour and a half for each of its 21 episodes. This is not one of those dramas that drag the story along, and the pace stays consistently dramatic for the majority of its run. It deals with serious topics, and dips into melodrama at times, but it always keeps its snappy and romantic edge to it, thanks to a zippy score (great opening credits) and solid performances by the criminally beautiful, Marcus Chang and Ivy Shao.

In this drama, Chen Che (Marcus Chang) is a successful and charming business man who seems to have everything, except the approval of his mother who holds the identity of his biological father hostage. In a strange turn of events, he is transported back to 1989 during the year that his teenage mother conceived him in hopes that he can find the identity of the mystery father he never knew. But can he ever return home? And what will he find? Are some things just better left buried? Tonally balanced with humor, romance, sadness, and with an emphasis on family --- this one is worth the look.

Evergreen Love (Japanese Film, 2016)

Evergreen Love is just one of those simple films, with a simple story that leaves you satisfied with the conclusion. While it is nothing earth shattering in its premise, it’s simplicity is its greatest asset.

Sayaka is a office worker who lives a mundane single life and carries a deep sadness she doesn’t articulate. One day she meets, Itsuki, a mysterious homeless man who is wandering shelterless around her residence. When he collapses, she takes him into her home and they set up a temporary living situation -- he cooks great meals for her in exchange for board, sparking a friendship that turns into something more. His affinity for plants and herbs becomes a bonding experience for both of them, and soon, he’s not the only one cooking and neither of them are alone. Is Itsuki, as all handsome leads are, hiding a secret? What will be revealed? Is it something that Itsuki and Sayaka can overcome?

First Time (Chinese Film, 2012)

I’ll preface this recommendation by explaining that this is a romantic film, with a melodramatic ending. With that being said, I wouldn’t turn away from its content for its tendency to engage in melodrama, as it has the variance of humor, lightness, music, and romance to balance its darkness. This was my first introduction to Angelababy, who if you’ve seen the currently airing history-romantic drama, General and I, is a very popular Taiwanese actress and her character carries herself like one of Alcott’s March sisters, with hidden strength and a zest for life.

In this film, Shi Quiao (Angelababy) is a young woman diagnosed with a terminal illness that could take her at any time. When she meets a former classmate, Gong Nin, a sweet and refreshing relationship happens between them almost immediately. What the film really focuses on is in exploring what a mother is willing to do for her daughter and the necessity of keeping secrets, because while all the characters love for each other is pure, it is never easy, and requires deep sacrifice. If this seems vague, and full of mystery, it is --- but make sure you watch until the VERY. LAST. FRAME.

Kyou wa Kaisha Yasumimasu (Japanese Drama, 2014)

Based off a popular manga, this drama tells the dramatic story of a permanently single 30 year old office worker, who on her 30th birthday becomes romantically entangled with a man much younger than her and the chaos that ensues from that. While the overly innocent characterization of the female lead, Hanae, may irrirtate some, it is not an uncommon character type seen in Japanese dramas as she tries to navigate a dating world she really doesn’t understand. For all her manic behavior, she is tempered by the love triangle she finds herself in, sandwiched between her young, but calm and subdued lover, Tanokura Yuuto, and the reassuring confidence of one of the successful men at her company, Asao Yuu, who becomes equally interested in her. The love triangle here doesn’t feel forced or irritating, and I found myself equally okay with whomever she ended up with. This is a benefit to this viewership, because while you can remain invested in the characters push and pull, you don’t have to feel tethered to a specific storyline, which made this really enjoyable for me.

Mood of the Day (Korean Film, 2016)

This could just be your run-of-the-mill romantic comedy film, if it wasn’t for the adorable chemistry between Yeo Yeon Seok and Moon Chae Won -- already two incredibly popular Korean actors -- who just sell this film so well.

Lighter than most romantic k-films I’ve seen, this one hits all the right notes. In it, Yoo’s character Kim Jae Hyun, a single playboy, is stuck on a train to Busan sitting next to an attractive, but cynically commited woman, Bae Soo Jung (she’s been in a relationship for 10 years) who Jae Hyun is attempting to convince to spend the night with him. She is sometimes annoyed by him, and sometimes charmed (as is the audience), and while their trip to Busan gets more and more complicated, so do their feelings for each other.

Nothing earth shattering or original with this plot, but it works because it’s cast so well, and becomes so easy to see these two interact with each other, that the plot really seems secondary to the cuteness. :-)

Ore Monogatari!! (Japanese Film, 2015)

One of the cutest (and craziest) films I’ve seen yet, Ore Monogatari (also called My Love Story) tells the tale of a young high school student, Takeo, who falls in love easily, but is used to being disappointed by the women he likes. He is insecure over his larger than life stature, and is often disregarded by women who turn to the cool and shallow attractiveness of his best friend, Sunakawa. One day, he saves a young woman, Yamato, from a hapless vagrant, and becomes immediately smitten with her, but he’s convinced the interest she shows in him is really only for his best friend -- but is that true?

This movie is absolutely crazy and HILARIOUS. Equal parts funny and romantic, and if you’re in the mood for truly zany characters, I highly recommend carving out a couple hours for this one.

Never Said Goodbye (Chinese/Korean Film, 2016)

The saddest recommendation on this list, I initially watched this film for the beauty that is the Korean star, Lee Joon Gi and wasn’t disappointed. This film tells the tragic story of Joon Ho and Xiao You, a Korean/Chinese couple who break up after Joon Ho reveals that he is leaving China for Sicily. Heartbroken, she finds out later, that Joon Ho had unexpectedly died while they were apart and has difficulties moving on from his absence. The story becomes more complicated, when it is revealed how little Xiao You knows about his missing time, and what lengths people will go to in order to protect the person they most love. Tragically bittersweet, this has a great score and great performances overall with a comfortable pace and complicated characters. Definitely a solid recommendation, but make sure you have a box of Kleenex. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Nigeru wa Haji da ga Yaku ni Tatsu (Japanese Drama, 2016)

By episode 2, this drama had intoxicated me. While the romantic comedy genre has been quite an elusive beast in recent Japanese dramas (for me at least), Nigeru wa Haji da ga Yaku ni Tatsu was that mysterious entity: a story so genuine, so charming, so witty, and so heartfelt that even the hype was underselling it. It may not have the flash of the kdrama, but for what it lacks in length (and maybe press) it makes up for it’s ability to connect with its audience.

This drama, also called We Married as a Job, stars Aragaki Yui as Mikuri, a qualified college graduate who is having trouble landing a decent job. When she gets an offer to do some housekeeping for a serious bachelor, Tsuzaki Hiramasa, she jumps at the chance to work for such a straightforward and detail-oriented man. When circumstances arise, and drastic measures must be taken to keep Mikuri in his employ (I promise it makes sense), they concoct a plan to enter into a “contract marriage” in which she will act as a “housewife” while being able to board at his home without much suspicion. As with all contract relationships, the rules the pair set are only further complicated by their budding feelings, and chaos ensues.

The heart here is in the relationship between the two leads, who vacillate from being heartbreakingly awkward, to deeply funny and lovable. I can honestly say that there wasn’t a bad episode in the lot, and at 11 well constructed episodes, I think it’s worth the gander.

The Lover (Korean Drama, 2015)

If you are already a kdrama fan, this might have been a drama you missed in 2015, because it mostly flew under the radar. Produced by Mnet, it wasn’t a drama that was talked about in any regularity, and as most kdramas go, the tone it sets is vastly different to most relationship dramas in Korea that I’ve seen (and I’ve seen A LOT).

Boasting an ensemble cast, The Lover, surrounds the romantic relationships that exist between four different couples living in the same apartment complex in Seoul -- a couple who has been together for years and have settled into the complacency of a comfortable relationship, a noona couple where an older woman lives with her younger boyfriend who’s a budding rockstar, an engaged duo hoping that living together with convince them that marriage would work for them, and two young men forced into a living arrangement that constantly brings about tensions for both of them.

It is on the raunchy side for mainstream k-entertainment, and it was a refreshing and delightful twist. Most of the romantic stories are compelling and the pacing of the show is quick enough to not get bored by the focus on any one couple, while being INSANELY funny and deeply heartfelt. It was one of those dramas I watched in 2015 that I was most surprisingly pleased by, and would gladly watch seven more times.

Tomorrow's Cantabile (Korean Drama, 2014)

After watching, Tomorrow’s Cantabile a couple of years ago, I had all but forgotten about it, but my recent viewing of its Japanese counterpart, Nodame’s Cantabile, brought upon me a great deal of nostalgia. While never reaching the heights of the Japanese original (which is derived from an INSANELY popular comic) what it lacks in the manic energy and zaniness of the Japanese version, it makes up for in quirkiness and heart. They are virtually the same story, but the execution and characterization of the main leads differ in each of the dramas. Both are really worth a watch.

In Tomorrow’s Cantabile (or Naeil’s Cantabile), the story surrounds Cha Woo Jin (Joo Won) a prickly musician who is committed to become a prolific classical conductor. Do to personal circumstances, he must attend a music conservatory in Korea and is unable to travel to Europe to work with the greats, but make no mistake, he has a savant-like talent for conducting and creating great music, with a domineering and anti-social personality who demands perfection from all those around him. He comes face-to-face with his classmate, Naeil, when he first hears her play piano and is immediately impressed with her talent (which is no small feat), but while Woo Jin is a dedicated musician, she is less of a dedicated student preferring to consider playing the piano as an element of fun and takes almost nothing too seriously, which frustrates Woo Jin. He sees talent in her and he tries to drag it out of her, and while she becomes immediately smitten with him, the wackiness and ambivalence of her character is in direct opposition to the seriousness of his. They soon realize that there is no escape for either of them...because they have side by side apartments. Can they break down the walls (yes, I see the irony because they share a wall) each other has built up to protect them from pain? Or will they both be forced to hide from the musical talents forever?

Joo Won and Shim Eun Kyeong are an interesting pair in this drama, because they are two actors you would never usually see together. While Joo Won is used to playing the blustering lead, Shim Eun Kyeong is less of your obvious romantic actress, which only makes her character that much more charming. It is deeply funny and the music is beautiful and intoxicating. My only warning is this: don’t go into the film expecting it to be exactly like the comic or set the same tone as the Japanese version, and you will most likely enjoy it. That’s what I did and I am capable of enjoying all versions of this great story --- the music really does speak for itself.

Other Amazing Recs (but better well known):

The Liar and His Lover (Japanese Film)

A Girl and Three Sweethearts (Japanese Drama)

Beautiful Life (Japanese Drama)

Ex-Girlfriend Club (Korean Drama)

Hear Me (Taiwanese Film)

Marriage Contract (Korean Drama)

Orange (Japanese Film)

Our Times (Taiwanese Film)

Senior Secret Love: Bake Me Love (Thai Drama)

The Beauty Inside (Korean Film)

Let me know if you watch any of these dramas or films and what you think of them!

#drama recommendations #kdrama #twdrama #jdrama #back to 1989 #tomorrow's cantabile #nodame cantabile #Nigeru wa Haji da ga Yaku ni Tatsu #the lover #never said goobye #Ore Monogatari!!#Kyou wa Kaisha Yasumimasu #mood of the day

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