#adicionally ive developted the habit of calling ppl 'life' in portuguese

[corujalesbica]

I also write fanfic in English but I'm Brazilian and we have way MORE pet names (+ much, much more curse words). And it's like, you can't call someone your little coconut sweet in English without sounding weird and that's so sad. I'm sorry German has even less pet names than English, I can't phantom not being able to be endearing to everyone 100% of the time.

I love writing fanfiction in English and using cute pet names like "love" or "dear" or "darling" because there's just so many nice terms of endearment and I'm German. There is like, one German pet name that's actually cute and the rest you can come up with is the equivalent of walking into the office in an ahegao hoodie on a Monday morning and announcing to all your colleagues that your partner names your body parts after beloved Disney characters. I'm convinced that when you're German and you die and go to the 9th circle of hell, Satan personally hands you a "welcome home loser" leaflet that starts not with your name but with "Dear Knuddelbär" to make it abundantly clear just what kind of place you walked into and that you're never getting out. When I was 15 I had a boyfriend who called me Schnucki once and I had such a visceral reaction of discomfort that I could not take that person seriously from that day forward and broke up with him a week after. Back in my early days of fandom in the year of our lord 2013 someone in the Blue Exorcist fandom asked me "oh what are some cute German things you can call your partner, I tried googling but I don't know which of these I should use" and for a moment I wanted to delete this person's entire search history, unplug their wifi router and do a cleansing ritual for our poor mortal souls but eventually settled for "call them Schatz and roll with this throughout the entire work. Alternatively, use something in English."