#addiction isn't a moral failing!!!!!! but it is something you have to be careful about.

[dilfsisko]

Hey. Hey listen. If someone ever tries to tell you that weed isn't really a drug and that it's non addictive, they are lying to you.

[marshemillow]

You know what? I'm talking about "phone addiction" again because I'm not done.

Do you know what an addiction is? Addiction isn't "you do it just out of habit because you don't think about it" addiction is "if you stop you will literally be in agony and that's why you keep turning to the thing."

We have this baked-in idea that addiction is a moral failing, that if you have a phone addiction, it really just means you need to get off your phone. Yeah, addicted to alcohol? Just stop! Don't drink it anymore! Withdrawl? What's that? If you drink alcohol, it obviously means you just don't have enough willpower! If you can't stop drinking alcohol, it means you're a bad person. You basically deserve to have liver failure at that point!

Yes some people actually believe this! They don't know that paramedics carry alcohol with them specifically because it saves the lives of people going through alcohol withdrawl, they don't care! It's something they cheer themselves up with because they aren't addicted to alcohol, and that means they're a good person.

I am so sick and fucking tired of people pathologizing and moralizing non-moral issues. Addiction, or Substance Abuse Disorder, is an actual physical health condition. It's a disease. You can't stop it with enough willpower, it's something that needs actual medical treatment. Just looking at coping mechanisms or even just things that make you feel good because they release dopamine in your brain and calling that an "addiction" does so much damage to people's understanding of real addiction and makes addicts look like evil weak cowards instead of people with a disease that needs treatment. That's fucking evil. Imagine telling someone with cancer that they just didn't have enough willpower to stop it. Disgusting.

And it's extra ironic coming from these people who think they're addicted to their phone saying "you just need to stop" and then not stopping, meanwhile I have often just forgotten I don't have my phone with me and then get confused when I don't have it. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Why is the person who "knows" it's an "addiction" (in the moral failing way) still not have enough willpower to stop whereas I have to consciously remind myself to go find my phone because I just forget it exists when I don't believe in phone addiction? Literally half the time I take my phone out of my pocket, it's just to check the time.

It's almost like "phone addiction" is just another way to make people feel guilty for doing things they like doing. It doesn't make them stop, they just feel worse about it. They don't think about it as a coping strategy that fades as their life circumstances get better.

And every single time, when you find these people who feel bad for doing things that make them happy, they grew up christian. Every fucking time. "Struggle with addiction" and it's just guilt applied to something normal.

STOP MAKING YOUR CATHOLIC GUILT EVERYONE ELSE'S PROBLEM!!! IF YOU CARED ABOUT "PHONE ADDICTION" YOU WOULD BE TAKING ACTUAL STEPS TO MINIMIZE HARM, NOT THROWING GUILT AT PEOPLE JUST FOR ITS OWN SAKE!!!

[mctna2019]

Seon-ho and Sung-rok relationship(2)

About Sung-rok: He seems to be a rough and hard character, he doesn't get caught up in his personal emotions (although those emotions are somehow responsible for his death) and perhaps his most important and best trait is his loyalty. He is a person who acts more than talks. He got to where he is through difficult circumstances, I think the Jurchens were also a people who were looked down upon a lot so it's not nice for him to see someone like Seon-ho rising at such a young age (it's not about jealousy, he thinks Seon-ho is a selfish and spoiled kid who hides behind his father) but he isn't and Sung-rok doesn't know, he humiliates Seon-ho for that. his perspective changes when Seon-ho offers him to work for him.His pride won't allow it, but I love that scene both (Seon-ho's authority) and how Sung-rok quickly makes his decisive decision and shows his loyalty to him from the very beginning.Of course we lose a lot about the two of them after that sequence (how they got closer) also that two years they spent with jurchens.He has a grudge against Hwi (because of Liaodong) but Seon-ho forces him to spy on Hwi (and Sung-rok knows that it's not actually spying but Seon-ho's way of protecting Hwi) and I love the scenes that how he got angry at Seon-ho's behavior.(Among all the characters who considered Hwi a hero, he was the only one who didn't have a good relationship with Hwi, and this is interesting, on the other hand, it shows how much he cares for Seon-ho) Seon-ho is a fool (I love him, but He was really stupid by following and having some sort of dangerous addiction to Hwi, even though I love their bromance the truth doesn't change) Sung-rok keeps warning him about the consequences of following Hwi, but what's more interesting It’s that Sung-rok follows such a person. He can leave Seon-ho over and over again (I don't mean that Seon-ho deserves to be abandoned by him, it's what we expect him to do considering the character he has) but he doesn't leave Seon-ho. He fully consciously and voluntarily sinks into that pit slowly and mostly with Seon-ho.From one point on, no matter what Seon-ho does, Sung-rok is always by his side. I don't know his moral principles, but Seon-ho wanted to build an equal country in which there was definitely a place for Sung-rok's people too(Jorchens), on the other hand, Seon-ho couldn't fulfill his promises and failed. And that's another reason why Sung-rok could let him go (I'm so thankful he didn't). You know, I think he saw Seon-ho's intentions when others didn't (as I always say, him and Yeon) I don't know if it was just that or something else, maybe he saw someone who was very lonely and fragile and needed to be protected, like a younger brother . All this breaks my heart even more.Someone wrote that Sung-rok saw the truth in Seon-ho. Hwi has three friends who like his father, he also has Hui-jae and Bang Won to support him and lift him up whenever he failed, but after Yeon's death, Seon-ho only and only has Sung-rok.Sung-rok wants to do all those things alone and fill the place of all the people Seon-ho doesn't have and be his family. Yes, Hwi was Seon-ho's best friend, Hwi and Yeon are his country and in a way his family, but Sung-rok is definitely a family to Seon-ho all those twelve years and supported him, trusted him and never leaved him alone. That's what makes him so precious to me, no matter what his principles were, he really fought honorably.I'm glad he was able to tell Seon-ho that being with him didn't feel bad for him and reassured Seon-ho. I can't forget his eyes whenever Seon-ho was hurt. He had a kind heart and opened it only for Seon-ho. I'm glad that Seon-ho also noticed and was aware and appreciative of all his work. And it calmed me down so much that Jeong Bum (I loved him so much) treated his corpse with respect and even buried him instead of Seon-ho who was injured. Although his death was very sad, the way he looked at Seon-ho, the words he wanted to say and couldn't, breaks me all the more.

[super-hero-confessions]

I wish more people would have a legitimate and nuanced understanding of what true evil is between Billy Butcher and Homelander.

Pure evil requires the prerequisite that you are fully aware and understanding that what you are doing will explicitly cause knowingly unnecessary harm, but then choose to do so anyway. It requires being taught about morality prior to engaging moral or immoral actions.

A tiger or crocodile or bear isn't evil because it catches and eats a small child. It is a wild animal simply doing what a wild animal does by hunting. It isn't necessary that the child specifically ends up a meal, but it is nature. There is no moral question behind it, it simply is.

Similarly, Homelander is a wild animal with zero understanding of the moral question. What he does shows that he is attempting to fit a role without a full understanding of what any of it means. He is still dangerous and a threat to humanity, but evil is the wrong choice of word for his actions because he is incapable of understanding the full weight of them from any sort of moral or philosophical place.

Calling Homelander evil is simply put, malapropism.

Many of his actions stem from a place of either false beliefs or lack of proper training. Failing to save flight 37 is a net neutral action as an example. He didn't do good, but he technically didn't do bad either. He wasn't trained to handle the situation properly and those people were already dead even before he showed up. His presence changed nothing at all when it came to their fates as they would have still died had he not shown up, he just wasn't the shining hero they expected him to be.

And had he not shown up, he wouldn't have been blamed.

But not meeting a standard that others place on him without proper explanation or understanding isn't his fault or failing in actuality, it is the fault of his teachers. Much in the same ways that when a child commits a crime, the parents are held responsible.

It doesn't really matter how old Homelander is when Vought did everything to ensure he retained the mentality of a child so they could control him.

Compare with Billy Butcher, who does everything in his power to do what he fully understands is immoral. And he will destroy anything and everything if it means accomplishing his goal. Even when we seem him be in the wrong, he keeps driving towards that edge.

Regardless of if he's right or wrong, he just wants to see Homelander lose control so he has an excuse to fight him.

The plight of Billy Butcher has nothing to do with battling a corrupt agency or even getting justice for his wife. He's never cared about any of that, they're just convenient excuses to give that make others give a pass to his immoral actions. It has everything to do with an addiction to violence and self destruction. Something he is fully aware of being wrong. Fully aware of the consequences of. Fully aware of how much his wife and baby brother and even mother would have hated his actions. And just how much his father would love them.

But doesn't care.

For Billy Butcher, it's more about seeing a nuclear bomb. And wanting to set it off regardless of the consequences that may bring for everyone else. All while having people fooled into believing he's the one trying to disarm it. He's not. In fact, what he wants is much worse than that and he knows this.

Billy Butcher is actually pure evil. More so than Homelander could be and contributes to the fear mongering against Homelander.

The real difference is their capability and self control. While Homelander is capable of far worse, he actually has far more self control than Billy. Billy is much less capable than Homelander but chooses not to have any self control over his worst options.

And slowly but surely, Butcher's only real goal is to drag Homelander down to his level and watch the world burn for it.

Currently. Because if he wins and finally gets what he wants and survives, he only gets far worse from there.

[a-lady-of-pseudony]

My bridgerton addiction had come back and I feel the need to share my opinion, despite it being unnecessary or unwanted lels hahaha.

But do allow me of the privilege to speak for I had kept whatever this is inside of me for weeks now.

Penelope by far, had been discriminated and been subjected of the scrutiny of some, for the choices she have made and the articles she had chose to release as lady whistledown. And pardon me if I say I find this hatred quite unnecessary, as a show watcher since season 1 and a book fan as well, I can say that whatever Penelope does isn't jealousy, that whatever it is that she had chosen to write isn't written to discriminate but rather to point out the flaw that she thinks she sees. And that one must remember that whatever she writes wasn't actually originally from her but from the wagging tongue of the ton themselves (except for some bits that she revealed to save some people ofc) , I mean yeah, she's the one who published such scandal but her scandal is ofc taken from the rumors she heard among the ton, that what she chooses to say is merely her opinions on the topics she had heard, hence it is called a scandal sheet not a news paper. Another thing is her revelation and articles about certain people namely; Marina, Colin, and Eloise. First of Marina and Colin, I have read and constantly heard so many foul words said because of this issue, and so allow me to explain my take on this end, Penelope had begged Marina, take note BEGGED Marina not to include Colin in her plans, and when this fails, she turned to Colin to warn him, which bad for him chooses not to believe her words, it is then that she decided to release and write that article about the pregnancy. Listen here people, check this out she didn't say anything about him calling on Marina, instead she just watched them from the corners with jealous eyes, and for those who claims that she did it for herself, why would she do that? If you notice Pen is Marina's cousin, Marina debuted under the featherington name which would mean that whatever fate marina had planned affects her prospects and fate as well, revealing Marina as a liar would result negatively to her family (as you have ofc seen). What she did isn't selfishness, but rather the opposite as it put her in trouble, she is merely saving a friend, who doesn't deserve to be deceived to take care of another man's children without his knowledge. Next of is Eloise, again and again, I will tell you that Eloise is the one at fault, she chose to put herself in situation that would bring her repercussions. Eloise is the one who chose to indulge herself in identifying lady whistledown's identity, and again, as always Penelope had warned her more than once that what she does will put her in danger. But no Eloise just had to push her way in because she is stubborn as that, if only Eloise listened from the very beginning that she shall not indulge herself in such things anymore, she wouldn't have met theo, who lead Eloise to become the Queen's prime suspect as Lady whistledown. I know that some would say that Penelope could just reveal herself, ofc she can, but do you honestly think that the queen would believe her? Hell no, the queen would only think of her revelation as a way of saving Eloise's reputation (which she explained, *scene with madame delacroix*), in which at that time would only result to bigger consequences (given the scandal between sharma and bridgerton).

What Penelope does isn't something we could say morally right, but something that the situation requires, she maybe harsh and cruel, but that is the point, honesty is often cruel as it is reflected by the show. If you wanted to blame someone, it is not Penelope but the characters who chose to do that to themselves.

Had Marina, Colin, and Eloise, chose to listen to what Penelope had said bigger consequences should have been prevented.

And as I end my commentary, I again beg of you that I want no hate, that I merely offer my opinion on such topic. That is all, thank you!

Pardon the crooked english and improper grammar, I am quite sleepy while writing this commentary.

[thunderheadfred]

❄️Todoroki HC's🔥

Aged-up pro hero Shouto. NSFW under the cut. Minors do not interact.

- - -

General

Might as well be tied with Bakugou for the #1 pro hero spot; they seem to pass the crown back and forth every other year. Everyone knows about their intense frenemies uber-rivalry. Well. Everyone but Shouto.

He's asked to speak at a lot of charity events. If he has time to prepare (and hire a speech writer) he is capable of stirring crowds to standing ovations. But if caught unawares... he gets cornered into hilarious on-the-spot interviews. He's been memed. Mercilessly.

He's an OP character, but unfortunately he rolled -500 in fashion sense. Eventually he wises up and hires a stylist. When he finally cuts his hair a slightly different and even more flattering way, it's a national event. People faint in the street.

Does god-awful sleight-of-hand magic tricks when he meets young fans, even though nobody asked him to. The second-hand embarrassment is palpable. But he keeps doing it. God, why does he keep doing it?

Has hovering arm syndrome in every fan photo.

Super into pop music. Not a fan of any particular group or artist, couldn't tell you the name of a single song. But every time he turns up the volume on the radio it's like... really? THIS? Probably pumps that shit through his hero agency to keep up morale. Has no idea what you mean when you tell him his music taste doesn't match his personality.

Similarly, he enjoys brainless romantic comedies and old silent movies. Doesn't laugh at jokes but loses it over physical comedy. Thinks Buster Keaton and Harold Lloyd are the funniest people who ever walked the earth.

He's long and limber. Runs practically a hundred miles every day just to "relax." Doesn't even get sweaty doing it. A filthy yoga addict. He'll probably live to be 200 years old.

He can regulate his body temperature for quirk use but in everyday life he's always half a degree outside the Goldilocks zone. It drives him quietly insane; he has an epic love-hate relationship with his thermostat.

Has a therapy animal pet. Doesn't matter if it's a dog or a cat or a bird or an iguana or a teeny tiny rodent. It's the best-behaved animal in the country and speaks more languages than you. It has its own room and an instagram account with millions of followers.

Lives in a traditional Japanese estate that doubles as a national treasure. Probably has government-appointed snipers at the gate, and he's just like, "don't worry about it." You are afraid to touch anything. Fuck, don't even look at anything, just to be safe.

Has an outstanding personal chef who only gets to cook five things unless (thank fuck!!) company comes over. Impossibly picky eater. He rotates between a few "safe" foods and suspiciously side-eyes everything else. If you cook something unfamiliar for him it will be the most awkward meal of your life, because he'd never tell you he doesn't like it. But oh lord, just look at his face.

This clashes directly with his love of traveling. Frequently uses his hero earnings to visit exotic foreign locales over long weekends... but rarely tries the food.

- - -

Dating

A grey-ace demisexual disaster. You could count the number of people he's been attracted to on one hand. He falls madly in love every time and always gets his heart smashed to pieces when his crush can't magically intuit the meaning of his frigid longing glances and generically courteous romantic gestures.

Which is stupid, because he gets propositioned constantly. He can't walk out the door without being flirted with. People keep slipping him their phone numbers and he always directs them to his agency like a moron. It's a good thing he will never understand how attractive he is because that's the only thing keeping him from total world domination.

Conventional attractiveness does not compute. Shouto doesn't have a type, doesn't care that he's an eleven whilst you are merely mortal. He will fall for your personality above all else.

Probably falls head over heels because your schedules overlap in a completely ordinary way and he witnesses you doing something endearing or brave or most likely: utterly mundane.

Pick a favorite, because you're his favorite coworker, or his favorite barista, or his favorite random bystander in line at the grocery store. You made him smile once; then he spent the next three months daydreaming about your future together before you accidentally stomped on his foot, initiating your first real conversation.

He's big on healthy communication. HUGE. He goes to therapy and it shows. Will talk through literally everything to the point of delirium. Sometimes his dedication to resolving every issue right away can get overwhelming; sometimes you just need some frickin time alone. But it pays off, because the two of you have practically never have a "real fight." There's just no way for bad vibes to fester.

STILL, his family wasn't exactly... erm... verbally or emotionally supportive, shall we say. For that reason, he might not give you all the compliments you deserve, because it simply doesn't occur to him to do so. He assumes you know how he feels. If you're self-conscious or insecure in the relationship, it might take him a while to notice. But when he figures it out (or even better, when you tell him directly) he will make it up to you with enthusiasm.

Will take you on lavish dates. Spoils you rotten without actually intending to. He's clueless about money. If you wanted a sugar daddy, you just hit the fucking jackpot. But if the word valet makes you uncomfortable, perhaps suggest some romantic picnics instead. He can still go all out with the food and five-star location without making you see cartoon dollar signs.

Chronic Insomniac. Stays up too late watching YouTube every night. His viewing history is an incomprehensible blur of k-pop music videos, serial killer icebergs, and super girly crafty ASMR channels. When he's watching a video, he is unreachable. Please call back later and try again.

He's disgustingly cute when he sleeps. Doesn't snore, but drools. Sometimes the drool freezes and leaves frost trails on his face in the morning. Still sleeps with the giant stuffed cat pillow that his mother gave him when he was like, zero. He'll inadvertently suffocate you with it, and you will welcome death with open arms because awwwwww!!!!!

The first time he tells you he loves you will be after your traditional Japanese shinto wedding. You won't hear it again until you start a family. Honestly, it's a good thing he doesn't say it often and is always holding you when it happens. It's a knee-buckler.

- - -

Icy-Hot

I don't even need to say it. Shouto is as old-fashioned as they come. You will never open another door or pull out another chair for yourself as long as you live. He will ask before he holds your hand. He will ask before he kisses you. He will stop and check in if you so much as breathe funny during sex.

If you don't orgasm at exactly the same time while staring into one another's eyes, he'll consider himself a failed lover. God forbid you want him to pound you into the futon... cause you are going to have to present that scenario to him in writing first.

Physical intimacy rarely leads to sex. He loves cuddling, craves physical affection. He'll sprawl all over you and turn into goo while you hold him close. He's an amazing, astounding, phenomenally good kisser. And that's... nice and all... but sometimes you have to grab his face and say, "Shouto, I'm horny," before he's like so that's why you're currently dry-humping me?

Even if he isn't technically a virgin the first time (or the millionth time) you sleep together, you won't know the difference. He's a blushing violet. Every. Fucking. Time. This doesn't mean he's a bad lay, oh no. But there's always ten minutes of confused bumbling before he hits his stride and remembers oh yeah, I DO know how to fuck good.

Absolutely silent during sex. Focused. Intense. Sometimes you have to push him a little to make any kind of noise at all, just so you know you're pleasing him (oh don't worry, you are).

His cock is Just Right. Not to big or too small. Perfectly proportioned and symmetrical. Somehow pretty. Like a fucking factory prototype. It truly is not fair.

Gets handsy and restless at night, even if you both have work the next day. Seems to crave sex at three in the morning. You've given him more than one exhausted handjob.

Gets offended if you don't cum. Will go down on you for hours. Of course he uses his quirk to tease you. He doesn't typically use it during actual intercourse, but he's all about foreplay, and he'll use every tool in his arsenal.

His sex drive is completely fucking unpredictable. Sometimes he's all over you, other times he's an icy slab. His line of work leaves him busy and stressed on a near-constant basis, so you can't entirely blame his personality for this one. Just give him some time and help him take care of his basic needs. He'll come back around soon enough.

[yourstreetserenade]

Continuing my horror movie marathon, I was finally able to sit down and watch the new Hellraiser on Hulu and I have complicated thoughts.

The thing about the Hellraiser franchise is that for the past couple of decades it's been languishing. The first two are, in my opinion, classics, but the many, many sequels that followed were pumped out quickly and cheaply every few years in order for the studio to retain rights. Had the studio not churned out a Hellraiser film every few years, they would have lost claim and someone else could have stepped in and taken over the property.

So while I found the new Hellraiser movie to be simply good and interesting, it is a thousand times more beautiful, intriguing and chilling than the last several sequels.

You can tell that a proper amount of care went into the design and story. There were a lot of elements I liked, like the house as a cage and I really loved that like the original, the cenobites moved with a slowness to them. They didn't attack you in a crazed frenzy, they came slowly and walked with a sort of elegance to them. That, to me, made it more terrifying. I also really thought they looked amazing in terms of design.

I've seen a lot of people complaining about final girl Riley. Riley is a young woman struggling with substance abuse and has a strained relationship with her brother who goes missing after getting stabbed by the box. Many people have been bitching about the character because "who am I supposed to root for? A piece of shit drug user?"

But a protagonist doesn't have to be perfect, protagonist only has to be engaging. Did Riley make stupid mistakes? Yes, because she's a character in a horror movie, not because she's a drug addict.

As far as the addiction element of the story, I'd be really interested to hear or read someone with a history of it give their take. For me, what I took away is, addiction is something she lives with, and thus something her brother has to live with and because of that there's a great amount of tension between them. They scream at each other, they tell each other to fuck off and there is weight to these scenes, and yet, the moment either of them are in danger or hurt, that tension falls to the side. He chases after her to the park, she chases after answers for him to the estate. They both want to save each other, her from her addiction, he from the cenobites.

Drug addiction isn't a moral failing here though and I don't understand why I heard complaints of Riley over it. If you want an angelic, cut and dry final girl Clive Barker stories and films probably aren't for you. Hellraiser isn't and has never been a traditional slasher, Clive's original vision has always been more thoughtful and cerebral and yes, queer.

Now as for Jaime Clayton as Pinhead...

So here's the thing about the original Hellraiser, Pinhead and the cenobites don't even show up until the second half of the movie. Maybe the last 30/40 minutes of it. Now I was hoping that wouldn't be the case for the new one because I wanted to see Jaime shine but alas. Pinhead's presence is really only in the last half of the movie.

I really enjoyed Clayton's take on Pinhead. It was beautiful and terrifying and compelling. It was a breath of fresh air and I really hope this new film does well because I want to see more of her in this role.

Was it staggeringly amazing? Did it reinvent horror? No. Was it a huge step in the right direction for the franchise? Absolutely. Is it worth further installments? I would think so. This is a story where things exist in the grey and I like that.

[harrycook]

27

June 12th 2018 was my 27th birthday.

Here are 27 things I feel like I have learnt about life so far:

1. Don’t Argue With Stupid People.

You get nowhere. It’s like playing scrabble with a dog, no matter how well you play, the dog will end up shitting on the board and walking away like he won anyway.

2. Eat The Damn Cake.

Yes I know that eating right and exercise is important for your health, but if you are in the vicinity of a cake or delicious bite of something, just eat it.

3. Working Is A Part Of Life, Not The Entirety Of Life.

Unless you adore what you do for a living and it is your pasison and life’s mission, take a deep breath and don’t take it all so seriously. At the end of the day, a job is to pay the bills and have pocket money to go and enjoy yourself when you’re not working. Unless you are genuinely passionate about your career, don’t sweat it. Don’t break your back worrying about a job that would replace you within a week if you dropped dead.

4. Don’t Take Anything Seriously, Seriously.

Unless you are performing open heart surgery or have the cure for cancer in your back pocket, lighten the fuck up. No matter what your job is, ask yourself if it will matter in 100 years? If not, giggle and let it go. The world won’t stop spinning if you miss a deadline or make a mistake. Breathe. It’s all good.

5. Ignorance Is A Choice.

Yes. It’s 2018. There is no excuse for ignorance or stupidity when we have more information on our phones than a public library. If you don’t understand something, research it. Pick up a book, scan the internet, question everything, especially the news. Be curious, ask questions and most of all, don’t be lazy. Educate yourself so the world can be full of kinder, more worldly individuals who know what they are talking about.

6. Throw Away Anything You Thought You Knew That Doesn’t Sit Well With Your Values.

We grow up in a society that feeds us garbage from the moment we enter the world. Boys are taught to be one way and girls are taught to be another. It’s a system that hasn’t changed in hundreds of years because society wants us to constantly keep within the mold. Screw that. Break the mold and let people be who they want to be. Go after a job you want, not what society wants for you. Travel, see the world, stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and go after the stuff that means something to you.

7. Laugh At Every Chance You Get.

Nothing beats a good belly laugh. Plus, it’s also extremely healthy. Laugh as often as you can. This goes straight back to the not taking anything seriously thing. Giggle more. It works wonders for the soul.

8. Get A Hobby.

The past year I have picked up the piano again (not literally 'picked it up', obviously, but started learning again), attempted to learn Spanish, set a goal of reading a book a fortnight (up to book 25) and started working out a minimum of three times a week. Each year older I start realising how quickly time goes and how many amazing things are at my disposal to learn or try.

9. Read The News, Then Read It Again, And Then Research Some More.

Don't take anything at face value. Just because the news tells you one thing, don't take it as gospel. These news shows are run by multibillionaire white men and corporations with agendas. Don't take it at face value. Look in to things. Read as much as you can and become your own private investigator for the truth. Just because a news show says something, doesn't make it fact.

10. Read More.

Nothing opens up the heart and mind more than a good book. The excuse of not having enough time to read doesn't cut it. Instead of watching an hour of Netflix, take an hour to open a good book. It's good for the soul. Trust me.

11. Get A Pet.

YASSSSSSS. Get a dog. Then get another dog. Then when you think you simply can't handle the amount of snuggles you are getting, get another dog!! In all seriousness, dogs are extremely good for your health. They reduce stress and anxiety, boost happiness and are wonderful snuggle buddies. Adopt don't shop! There are plenty of rescue animals in need of good homes.

12. Sometimes People Hurt You. It Sucks.

Yes. Sometimes the people you never in a bazillion years thought could hurt you, will hurt you terribly. I had an experience in recent years with extended family that completely shifted my entire outlook on people in general. Sadly, some of the people you think you know are far from what you think. It sucks, yes, but once you acknowledge it, it slowly stops hurting. You can move on with your life when you realise that sometimes a wake-up call is all you need to realise that you're better off without certain people in your life. And that's totally ok.

13. Log Off. Often.

The age of social media is WONDERFUL for so many reasons. Keeping in contact with people, viewing beautiful content, learning things with a click and the hours and hours of streamable content are all fantastic reasons to use social media. But on the flip side, it can also be an information overload and I highly advise switching off, taking a bath and leaving your phone somewhere away from you for a few hours. It can't be healthy getting a constant stream of negative news 24/7. So unplug. Those cute puppy pics will be there when you get back.

14. Exercise.

I know, I know, YUCK. Exercise isn't the most fun of activities, and I am the first to admit that whenever I heard someone say "but the endorphins are good for your happiness levels" I'd roll my eyes so far back in my head I could see my brain. But it's completely and utterly true. Just a 40 minute run 3 times a week has improved my mood ten fold. I've suffered with depression, anxiety and addiction for years, but exercise allows me to completely refresh and enjoy the day on a belly full of endorphins. Do it for the feeling you get, not to achieve some unattainable body. It works a treat. Trust me.

15. Napping Is AMAZING.

Yes. Napping is one of the best damn things to do. Nothing beats an afternoon nap. It refreshes you for the rest of the day and is a great way to reboot the system. Don't let people tell you otherwise. It's bloody fantastic.

16. Journal.

I've written a journal since I was ten years old and looking back on all the adventures, worries, achievements and memories throughout the years is something I cherish so incredibly much. Studies have shown that journalling is really healthy for the mind and soul. Grab a notebook and get doodling.

17. Take Photos.

If taking selfies is your thang, go for it. If taking pictures of trees, animals or the sunset gets you going, snap away. Taking photos is therapeutic for a number of reasons, but most of all it's a lovely way to document your life with things to look back on. Get snapping.

18. Never Think You Know It All.

It's easy to be arrogant when we are conditioned all our lives with things we are expected to believe. "Boys should do this", "girls should do that". But just because we've been taught it from a society that has never been challenged to think differently, doesn't make it right. Question everything. Stay curious. Look into things and don't dismiss stuff you know nothing about. Not only is it a really ugly personality trait, it gets you nowhere in life. Opening your mind and heart is a surefire way of experiencing life in all its' beauty.

19. Go After What You Want In Life.

Jim Carey did a graduation speech about his father who never went after his dreams because he wanted to do the ‘safe thing'. Have a 'stable' career that would provide for his family. From memory, his father failed and lost everything in his 'stable' career. The moral being that if you are going to fail at something, at least let it be something you love, because the fact is it is just as possible to fail at something you hate. Give it a go. Life is too short to not go after what you want.

20. Travel. Travel. Travel.

See the world. It'll show you that we humans are all the same. It replaces ignorance with knowledge and shows you how vast our planet is. Get out there.

21. Someone Who Is Nice To You But Not Nice To The Waiter Is Not A Nice Person.

I love this quote because it's so damn true. Don't be a dick to service people. Don't think you're better than anyone because you're not. End of story. Period.

22. Get Over Yourself.

Sort of a continuation of the above, this is just a reminder to get over yourself, have a giggle and realise that just because you have a fancy car, a nice suit or well manicured hands means absolutely sweet F.A. Being a good person, showing kindness, empathy and caring about the planet and human beings as a whole is what counts in my books. Just be a good person. It's that simple.

23. Tell Your Loved Ones You Love Them And Don’t Go To Bed Angry.

Pretty self explanatory this one, but all the same, something to remember constantly. Life is far too short to go to bed angry at someone. Throw away silly arguments and tell the people you care about how you feel.

24. Screw What People Think Of You.

I mean it. Who cares what someone else thinks of you? That's their stuff. How they perceive you and how they feel about you is none of your business. Water off a ducks' back. Let it go.

25. Try Not To Worry So Much.

I know. Easier said than done, but sometimes it helps to take a step back, take a deep breath in and ask a few key questions: Can I do anything to change the current situation? If yes, do it. If not, let it go. Breathe through it and remember all we ever have is right in this moment.

26. Meditate.

YASSSSSSSSS times a million. Meditating is one of the most powerful things I have ever learnt in my 27 years on this planet. Taking a moment to just sit and reflect and focus on the here and now is one of the most intensely wonderful ways of reconnecting to what matters. There are a million different apps you can use or simply sit and count your breaths. It works wonders.

27. Life is what you make it, but most of all it’s about love.

Love, family, friends and making memories is the most important thing in life. Every year on this earth I realise more and more how utterly stupid it is to worry about material things. Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't enjoy material stuff whatsoever, but it shouldn't be what you go after in life. Nobody ever gets to the end of their life clutching on to their Chanel bag. The things that matter are the people you love and the memories you make.

So go for a walk, take in the view, have a laugh and breathe in every moment of every day. It's all we ever have.

- Harry.

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What it's Like

All too often I'm surrounded by people who have never felt like they were enough. Just the other day I read an article about a young person who took their life, and everyone says oh I wish I would have known I would have helped or something along the lines of we were such a good friends I had no idea. The harsh reality that it seems no one cares until after it's too late. I am 28 years old and I have been through hell. I have scars on my body that tell a million stories. Stories of a time when I could have used someone to just listen, stories of a time where I felt as though I was not good enough, stories of a time where I was being beat down over something someone else did or circumstance I could not control. I often read on social media people posting that they are going through such a rough time and no one knows what it's like but the truth is we're all going through something everyone's journey is different.In those circumstances they are correct we do not know what their journey is like but most of the characteristics from one story to the next are very similar it all boils down to this harsh world that tries to break us. In this life everyone points fingers without realizing that they have three more fingers pointing back at them. Everyone is so quick to judge everyone just because they're different. One person might have crazy hair, someone may be overweight,or underweight instead of hearing hey these people are human and they are beautiful we tend to see things like this; oh my God look at that freak, look at that fat ass why is she wearing that, or eww that anorexic looking bitch needs to eat something, and this isn't just pointed at women but also men. My question is why not in the time that it takes to insult someone or to talk down about them can we not do our best to lift people up? That's right.. it's not quite as easy to do is it? Considering everyone is trying to fit in somewhere. I understand that nobody is perfect including myself I am far from perfect but I try my best to be the person I needed when no one was there for me. My entire life I've always been overweight.I have done everything in my power to lose weight and it goes nowhere I have always been told that I'm a fat girl and that I'm gross or disgusting. My all-time favorite is oh you're a big girl but at least you have a cute face. I have gone weeks without eating, the many many failed crash diets, all the way down to drug addiction. I have always wanted to fit in so badly. I wanted to be beautiful in the eyes of society. I wanted to change to be everything everyone else wanted me to be, why not change society to fit me? Over the years I have learned that to the world we as individuals are one person but to one person we could be the world. There are so many trends that everyone is so quick to follow from eating Tide Pods, the in my feelings challenge, all the way down to the baby shark challenge...All the hype catches on. So why can't positivity and lifting people up be the hype that catches on? I do not live in a fantasy world, I know that there are things in this world that I cannot change, however that does not stop me from being a change that I want to see in the world.No matter what you're going through no matter how tough the situation is or how long you have been going through it just know that every storm runs out of rain at some point and there is light that follows the darkness. No one and when I say no one I mean absolutely no one deserves to go to bed at night wondering why they are not enough. I know that I cannot personally sit down with each and every person in this world to tell them how I feel on this subject however social media reaches just about everyone and even if this only helps one person,I'm okay with that. Moral of the story is to be the good we need in this world. A simple smile or hello could mean the world of difference for someone who feels invisible.