#a character like this before - exactly like this - and did a fantastic job

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

(Part 1) (Part 2)

Part 3 of the insanely long posts where I discuss the messy writing for Edelgard, why it failed her as a character, and how they had every opportunity to write her well but didn't.

This part continues my comparisons from the previous post. The post was already extremely long and I felt that it would be difficult to read it in one sitting if it wasn't broken up (it might even still be lol).

Like before, the Tellius games are used as examples that discuss what went wrong with Houses and how smoothly the story handled itself, versus Houses' push and pull story, particularly regarding Edelgard (as compared to Ashnard and occasionally Micaiah). That is to say, Tellius knew what it wanted to do and succeeded at doing it. Houses on the other hand wanted something and kept holding back.

It's notable how most characters refer negatively to those who joined the Empire, or there's indication that they were forced to do so.

"Deluding" being a very fucking good word used here, and by Ignatz of all people which says a lot on its own, let alone that he's saying it to his best friend. Basically, the general response to fighting characters from the Empire or who joined the Empire willingly is "you made your bed and now you have to lay in it", whether that's killing your friends or regretting your choice, etc.

"If I wish to live" is a very heavy thing to have to say. Lorenz is basically in no better a position than being a hostage at this point.

This is when attacking him with anyone but Byleth, so it's more difficult to say if he's talking to them or referring to himself (i.e. why would you attack the Empire at a time like this because doing so is reckless). Based on the above quote though, it's fair to assume he's referring to himself, indicating he wants to oppose them and plans to, but at the moment he can't.

Similarly, we have this from PoR:

Forced into service for Ilyana.

Implication by Oscar that Daein is a questionable choice. Shinon explains that he can rise to the top with good skill (which he has) and so chose Daein. This reflects Ashnard and Edelgard's "rise to the top" mentality.

Something else worth noting a bit off this particular topic is that Ashnard and Edelgard both refer to their rule as their vision for "the world". However, as far as the residents of Tellius are aware, Tellius is the world because the rest of the world save for their continent was drowned in a flood a long time ago. Edelgard refers to Fodlan, the continent, as "the world" multiple times in both games. Very notably, all main characters on all other routes refer to Fodlan as, well, Fodlan. When they speak of their ideals for its future, they still refer to it as "Fodlan", thus expressing their desire for the future of their continent, but not implying anywhere outside of Fodlan is beneath them (which would be true to Edelgard's character, as she believes all non-Adrestia lands are beneath her, which is literally one of the first things she ever says in Houses depending on your response selection).

Other than that, here we go with more similarities:

This is very reflective of what characters feel toward Edelgard. What Bryce says is also a reflection of CF's ending cards (those of you reading this who are here for this content and not hate reading know what I mean I'm sure, so I won't put in a full list of examples, but for some: censorship, assassinations, watching the citizens, Caspar's JP CF ending (implied to be no better than Miklan's old group), etc.

For the next one, Ashnard's line is basically the concept Houses gives off as a whole and is also even referring to a few times, that history will decide if someone's actions action were just or evil. It depends on the victors, and that's what Ashnard is saying here.

There's also the fact that he's being told, by a former Four Rider no less, that his path is "so incredibly stupid" (in the most polite, knightly way possible even LMAO. Points for Tauroneo for that one). Considering Ashnard and Edelgard have identical goals and motivations across the board (aside from genocide, as Ashnard doesn't care about genociding any race (i.e. Nabateans for Edelgard) and has no desire to) and this is dialogue given directly to Ashnard, who literally does not respond to the actual comments and pivots to something else (which is exactly what Edelgard does throughout all routes in Houses, be it her own or the others), imo it says a whole lot about Edelgard as well and the intentions the writers had for her as a character.

So effectively, Jill's words here are dismissed by her enemy. I don't recall that Edelgard does this quite so directly to people, but she does use words that dodge the comments aimed at her. She makes it a point to let her enemies know that she does not care.

Granted, at least Ashnard is funny about it! Come back some other time I'm busy is a lot funnier than no u.

Adding this in from RD since it holds relevance to the Edelgard portions of this:

This is if you don't recruit Jill and trigger this battle dialogue.

This is an example of desperately trying to defend the actions of someone you care about but can't actually defend. In this case, obviously Micaiah more or less had her hands tied because of the Blood Pact (an actual reason for the fighting that she was against and literally had no choice regarding, i.e. she wasn't "forced to do it because of the status quo" or any other nonsense used to prevent Edelgard from sounding like the villain the devs literally said she is).

Back to Tanith, boy, I wish she could've been in Houses with this line. For the people, Edelgard says? Look around you, naive classmates of hers who followed her because (insert shallow reason here that even Hopes gave more depth toward). Is all this death for the people? Well, according to Edelgard it sure is. It's deaths for the people! She sees a bright, happy future (for herself!) in all this death!

No, I'm not joking. Well, I'm making fun of it. I'm making fun of the fact that the devs actually thought to have this in the game (Houses) and still tried to pivot around her being a full on villain. Edelgard repeats many times that she will kill and sacrifice for her goals (not for the people, but for her own selfish goals like Ashnard. She uses "for the people" as her cover story, but we all know if we're not here to hate read what those CF ending cards really told us).

Point being, "for the people" is the cover up story, and Tanith is saying "this isn't for the people". Fact is, she's right. It's not for the people. In Micaiah's case as per this game, it's because they're being forced by Begnion (the Begnion Empire, mind you, which in both Tellius games has its own extreme problems among its nobility just like Adrestia) via Blood Pact to continue this fight. Tanith isn't stupid. She knows this mess isn't for the people. That's how Micaiah has to phrase it to get people to fight for her and not turn on her, because if they do decide not to fight, that means they aren't capitulating to the Empire's demands and thus the Senate will initiate the Pact. She convinces her allies it's for the people, who they themselves don't even necessarily truly believe it but force themselves to for a friend's sake.

For Edelgard, it's a cover up story, but of course it's not because of a Blood Pact. In her case, it's back to Ashnard. Her story/character/motivations/etc are a mix of Ashnard in Micaiah's part 3 situation. She's basically Ashnard but with people defending her with lines similar to what they say about Micaiah/why she's doing what she's doing. This doesn't mean Edelgard and Micaiah are the same, no - it means that's just what the characters say about Edelgard in her defense.

Also, if there's an Empire in an FE game, it's the villainous territory, plain and simple. As a few examples because I'm not going through every game:

Begnion is a major antagonizing territory in RD, and in PoR there are many things going on behind Sanaki's back because a good chunk of the nobility is corrupt. Even their army is corrupt in RD. Let's not also forget that the mastermind antagonist of the entire Tellius series' plot is the fucking Prime Minister of the Begnion Empire. He's no Duke Aegir (who is, mind you, also a villainous Prime Minister), but the way he manipulated Ashnard the way Thales manipulated Edelgard is eerily similar. Difference being, he actually cared about Sanaki and they had a very positive relationship which was genuinely real and true, but he did admit to lying to her and whatnot. He staged everything, much like how Thales staged everything to cause a continental war (the entire premise of what Ashnard is trying to do). The Begnion Empire is basically run by corrupt nobles and a guy masterminding a continental war, with Sanaki as the figurehead. It's a combination of Adrestia's corrupt nobles and Thales' manipulation, with Edelgard being the manipulated into action Ashnard who always had these ambitions but just needed the spark to begin his war.

In FE4's second half and in FE5, they are fighting, surprise, an Empire that is run by, surprise, a literal cult of shadowy, underground people waiting to take revenge on the bloodlined people. This is the inspiration they took from FE4 during Houses obviously, but that alone should tell you the Empire is meant to be the villainous territory in Houses. Jugdral had been ravaged by the Lopt Sect and the people were, and knew they were, suffering. All this to revive their god, just as the Agarthans were trying to revive their hero Nemesis. Mind you, Loptous is the villain that the bad people are trying to revive, so... that should probably tell you Nemesis ain't that great of a dude. If he's a hero the villains, anyone considering him a hero is also a villain. Edelgard just also believes anything the Agarthans feed her for some reason and parrot all their beliefs and desires despite being a victim of them. Stupid writing choice for her imo, but that's what was decided. Not to say Edelgard is anything like Alvis, boy oh sir no, that's another topic entirely but don't get me started on it. All I will say is that they're nothing alike. Edelgard says the pretty words but doesn't go through with them nor mean them. He says them and he means them, but he was blocked by the Lopt Sect who had the actual control of the Empire. Every blame was laid at his feet, but he had no real power and that was stated directly in the game.

Grado was basically an empire that was corrupt in waiting. No matter how righteous it seemed due to its leaders, as soon as those leaders died/got corrupted, the nasty people came flocking out. That means they were there all along and as soon as they got their chance, they took it. Take a look at the villains you face and how nasty of people they are. Look how bad it became as soon as Fomortiis was truly in charge.

Dolhr is a fucking disaster I ain't even getting into that internal dragon war turned dragon and human mess LOL; just know it's Not A Good Place. Also consider that Lang (a particularly terrible person) betrayed Grust (a perfectly reasonable place turned corrupt due to Dolhr's influence) to join up with them and Lorenz said Not Today, rebelled, and Lang was in charge of ordering Marth to go fend off that rebellion (and threatened Altea to get Marth to agree to fight). Lorenz continued to say Not Today to the point of committing suicide rather than work alongside them or die for them. He held no ill will toward Marth for what Marth had been ordered and essentially threatened to do (for fear of Altea's position in all this). Seeing Lorenz of all people refuse to take part in Grust's Dohlr loving bullshit, Marth also rebelled. Consider that how every time a Leicester noble sides with the Empire, it tends to be the corrupt or morally questionable ones. Like Marth, people were afraid to rebel. Quite ironically (or perhaps intentionally? who knows the devs ain't said), it ends up being Houses!Lorenz who rebels against the Empire in VW and optionally in AM if recruited (or in AM would die as, again, essentially the Empire's hostage). Like Archanea!Lorenz, he was against the Empire, and like Marth, fought with them for a short time out of the force of threat to himself/his lands and people but eventually had enough and turned on them.

So, did the writing skimp out on Edelgard and Adrestia being completely villainous? Yes. Are they supposed to be? Yes, absolutely. Both in writing and by the devs' word, she is the villain. Did they, in the game, fuck that up because she was marriage material? Absolutely! Did they reduce her character to being a love interest who was obsessed with the player character and couldn't win her war without her love interest? Yes, completely!

What I'm saying is that she had potential to be more interesting (re: I love Ashnard and I've said this many many many times and will never stop saying it because he's a great villain and probably my favorite in the entire franchise, which imo should say a lot when I view him and Edelgard on completely ends of the villain spectrum despite them being identical in all the explained ways) and it was ruined by the devs toning her down so that she could be waifu material.

She had potential to be a well written character and great villain like Ashnard is, but it was bogged down both making her an uwu sweet waifu (thus attempting to negate her bad qualities with the uwu behavior) and trying to insist that she was fighting for a good cause (which I suspect is because they wanted to make her marriage material. You don't see us being able to marry Ashnard or, as a female example of a villain, Petrine - who for that matter directly serves Ashnard).

My point in this last section is that FE Empires have been the villains since its goddamn inception, and Adrestia is no stranger to that, but Edelgard herself was written as though, because she's a woman, had to be fetish bait, marriage bait, and a cute girl. If it was a man running her Empire, we'd have the result of... -lists off every male imperial ruler in FE history-.

It's also a huge shame to me that the first time they truly had a woman in charge of the villainous territory, they completely botched it. It could have been awesome to have a good female villain, but they ended up blurring the lines. They ended up reducing her to straight man bait too, what with all her female relationships having women obsess over her (compare to the other wlw relationships, canonically optional or not (ex. Cathmir being a canon ending and Dorogrid not being an ending), which don't feature the women involved treating their partner how the women treat Edelgard). I'm not saying bi or lesbian players can't like her, but that she was seemingly written with straight male players in mind.

Other wlw relationships aren't written the way Edelgard's relationships are written, which is basically nothing but loving up on her most of the time (both male and female characters do this except Ferdinand and Linhardt, the former of which was completely rewritten to be a 180 and yet another of Edelgard's harem in Hopes). This includes Petra, who is a political hostage. She should be questioning Edelgard as to why her territory isn't free yet despite Edelgard being emperor now, or when it will happen. None of this is really touched on, and Petra just decides that she wants to fight and die for Edelgard (including in Hopes, where her feelings about that are even stronger and she literally says in their A support that she knows she's risking her life but actively desires to for Edelgard's sake, even if it means betraying her own people for it). Instead, they ignore all that for the sake of having yet another female obsess over her.

Now, does this mean people are bad for liking the better sides of her that happened as a result of this? No, people can still enjoy the character we ended up getting because of these side steps - the character we ended up with regardless of their intentions. However, I do think it's because of all these side steps that people don't see her as a villain despite every intention of that being there and being present. However, I also think people should understand why she's also hated because of these side steps. For example, why I hate the Edelgard that we ended up getting, but yet I love Ashnard despite all these many comparisons I've made.

It's just a shame that we didn't get to play on the villain's side and have it play out as, very explicitly, that the player character is now also a villain. That we made the choice for our character to be a villain to side with the villain and ultimately take part in villainous actions. It's a game with a story! That kind of thing should be explored! It doesn't make people bad for enjoying a villain's side of the story with that villain not being side stepped as a good person. If we got to play a route Ashnard I would love that! I wouldn't deny that he's the villain just because I'm playing his route though, and that's what CF tried to do - deny that the villain is the villain. It's not "everyone has their reasons" yadda yadda everything and anything is morally gray. That's what they try to push to excuse Edelgard despite her being Female Ashnard in every other regard.

There's a reason it got to the point of the infamous "no u" line - because they were trying to have a story that justified the villain, fell short of it because the not-villain they kept gunning for the idea of was committing villainous behavior/actions, and couldn't actually justify it in a way that sounded reasonable. It ended up coming like she had no excuse for her actions, which, yes, makes sense, because she doesn't have any! She's the villain! But they... tried so hard... to side step it... when they had nothing they could side step it with... and now that line is the local Houses laughing stock... in the woman's own route...

Lastly, there's the aspect of the war dialogue versus playable characters. There are two things:

Most of the recruitable students in CF only say they fight for the Empire because they fight for Byleth - their professor - not Edelgard. The only characters who specifically say they're fighting for Edelgard are the original BE students. The others claim to only be following Byleth's path (or they simply joined after being spared).

In other words, the recruited characters weren't given dialogue to imply they actually care about Edelgard's path and are not even there for her. That gives off the notion that these characters aren't necessarily even in agreement with her. Very few (such as Lysithea if recruited prior to being spared, and Constance) actually fight specifically for the Empire or Edelgard (and Constance's reason is for herself and not Edelgard).

Basically, the writers didn't bother even trying to give the characters motivation to fight for Edelgard's path, and so made many of them - let's face it - ooc in the process. I won't go over details in this post about specific characters being ooc, but if anyone is ever curious and doesn't already know, I could definitely make separate posts for those.

In comparison, RD gives legitimate motivations to the characters you fight against regardless of which side they're fighting on. Zihark is the most iffy, as his motivations to defect from Daein for the Laguz Alliance make more sense, but even he is at least given the introspection of "why am I fighting for this/what am I doing". Any character who was previously playable in PoR has a legitimate motivation to fight for the side they're on, including the possible defector characters where their dialogue makes sense on either side.

Some characters also understand they're fighting people they care about and just won't fight them. Brom and Meg, father and daughter (a huge disaster in CF when it comes to parents fighting their children and absolutely butchering the parent characters' characterization just to somehow make the situation work even though there were better ways of handling that) won't fight each other, just as Zihark will not attack laguz - fitting right into his character. He will attack back against a beorc, but in gameplay will not attack back if attacked by a laguz.

In Houses, they didn't even bother with this and it made a lot of the relationships feel a lot more shallow. For example, Ilyana is only on the side of the Laguz Alliance in part 3, but she can talk to Micaiah - her previous commander in part 1. She attempts to talk Micaiah out of fighting, eventually deciding well okay fine we're both strong against each other's magic so it's not too bad, to her despondently giving up and saying they should forget that conversation ever happened.

On a very similar note, the dialogue in Houses is often very volatile (particularly in the localization) from recruited characters to their former friends.

They gave off the impression that the Empire is right and just, and how dare anyone be against them. The dialogue is handled in a way that makes almost every character angry (with few exceptions, one being Mercedes against Annette) with their old friends. There is very very little of characters being genuinely upset in a sad way that they're fighting their old friends.

When characters in RD know each other and have to fight, it's always respectful and/or sad. The relationships are respected in the writing - individually - and character's didn't have to be tweaked to make their situaton work.

What does this have to do with Edelgard's writing? It's the fact that characters recruited onto CF treat the war they're fighting on the side of to be the correct side in a way that tells the player "you are the good guys". Now why is that a problem? Because the intent was originally to make Edelgard a villain.

Instead of going through with it, they made it so every character you recruit (including characters who spent their entire lives prior to the war living in the lands they are now attacking and helping an aggressor army invade) didn't just become a villain along with the rest of the people on your side. They make them come off as actually justified.

I don't mean just that the characters themselves believe they are personally justified, but that the narrative itself tries to tell you yes, they are actually justified... even though we're trying to also tell you that these are the villains you're with. The narrative itself pushes against itself, framing you as being in the right, and always pushing characters to be sad about fighting Edelgard regardless of her actions.

While Dimitri has the back and forth in the second half of AM about how he feels about fighting her, he's the only character who has a justifiable reason to feel so conflicted. The narrative is always pushing how sad it is that you have to fight her outside of just Dimitri's feelings. They take it a step further in Hopes, when Edelgard basically has a harem of people obsessed with her and praises her for all she does, never telling her when she's gone too far.

Compare this to Micaiah, who Soren claims is seen as a goddess by her followers. She has the love of many people, including playable characters, who openly doubt her and her actions (specifically in part 3) - repeatedly. Micaiah is not a villain and is not written to be. Characters push against her for answers and reasons (including Sothe, who is basically the Hubert to Edelgard), leaving her in awkward positions where all she can say is that she believes in her king, because the truth is, she has no other answer.

Houses' narrative keeps trying to insist that Edelgard is justified and heroic, while constantly having her lie to the other characters/not answer their questions or concerns, ally with the other villains, invade innocent and neutral lands, conscript civilians, admit to sacrificing her own civilians for her own personal selfish goals (so sacrificing random innocent civilians just going about their daily lives who have nothing to do with her), consider all lands not ruled by her to be beneath her, victim blame anyone who fights back against her, and... the list. Goes. On.

As a character she had potential to be a great villain whose side of the story you could actually play, but for whatever reason the writers just... didn't go through with it. Whether it was for marketing, because they didn't really know what they wanted to do ultimately, felt that you shouldn't be able to marry a villain and didn't want to remove the option to marry her, who knows. It just remains that the story went in wildly different directions and ended up with people having different perceptions of Edelgard because of it.

And if anyone says "but you hate Edelgard so of course you would say all this!", I'm gonna respond to them with a picture of Ashnard and that's it. :)

Also, I hate Micaiah (and will admit she's not the villain) and have for many, many years (looong before Edelgard was even a thought in IS' mind)... but Edelgard's existence has lessened that hate somewhat slightly because of how awful her character is. I don't mean that in a love to hate way either - I mean that treating her atrocious behavior and actions as good and heroic is disgusting and abhorrent to me.

There are extremely, extremely, extremely few characters in the entire overall franchise I truly hate with a visceral hate that goes beyond "ugh they're so annoying". Of those characters, most of them are just well written villains and not characters I hate the stories of (Valtome comes to mind, but he's a very unfortunate case of evil queer villain stereotype. May not have actually been an intentional dig at queer people from IS though and may have actually been a harmless whoopsie (especially given how RD has, iirc, the first trans character in the franchise, which the localization sneakily completely cut out from its existence. Nowadays we have Rosado for queer rep, so that points a little bit more to Valtome being a big whoopsie-we-didn't-mean-it-that-way. Lekain also comes to mind, who at least isn't a big oopsie).

So no, I don't just hate Edelgard for the sake of hating her. I hate her because the narrative evidently couldn't handle her, or the fact that she was a female lead and a villain. Considering that, that's why I wanted to make this analysis - to list off the reasons that I find that the writing failed her as a character. That writing is how my feelings came to be what they are.

She wasn't allowed to be her own character and own it. Ashnard was allowed to be his own character and own it. I don't agree with Ashnard and his world would be shit to live in lol. He's an interesting and amazingly handled character though, and I absolutely love him for what he is.

I love Tellius because of how authentic the writing feels. How real, true and emotional it feels. Both its games don't shy away from putting their leads on the spot. It tackles difficult subjects and it handles them spectacularly. Characters are put into certain situations where they react as you would expect them to, thus not manipulating things here and there just to make a situation fit and work that normally shouldn't.

Yes, I am absolutely fucking telling you that Sylvain would never lay a hand on Dimitri, Felix or Ingrid that wasn't a bro hand or a flirt hand. He is their awkward flirting bro and he would not kill them. Thanks Hopes btw for fixing the recruitment issue and making almost none of the Lions able to defect - because they wouldn't based on who they are and instead of staying true to that in Houses, they changed those things just to fit the mechanic of recruitment instead of limiting who you could recruit to make sense with the characters.

Anyway, I think I'm done with this absolutely ridiculously insanely gigantically huge giant analysis that took three massively enormous parts to finish. Hopefully I don't think or anything else to add.

If you made it this far, you are the good shit.

[whetstonefires]

I was really enjoying the recent 'Amanda Waller vs the Entire DCU' Justice League storyline, because Waller is one of my favorites and this story just kind of pulled out all the stops on her.

Sad her Brainiac Queen Oracle-bot 'daughter' didn't get a longer run; kind of like Slade Wilson the fact that Waller is a middle-aged parent who has not done any actual parenting for a long time informs her character in fun ways imo, so the superbot calling her 'mother' was great. Waller is so much fun, and very like with Lex Luthor it's always a delicate balance between letting her be cool and letting her eat absolute scenery. (Before inevitably eating floor.)

Her premise is very much like. What if Batman was just some guy, where 'guy' is gender neutral, and the terms are set that by 'just some guy' we don't mean sane and normal, we mean not in a position to become a fulltime superninja.

Her chosen weapon instead is bureaucracy.

Her backstory, which as far as I know is still current, is she was a normal middle-class citizen whose husband and one of her kids went out one evening and got shot to death in a Random Gun Crime.

To which she responded by going back to school, getting a doctorate in Political Science, and seeking employment with the federal government. Because this trauma led her to crave access to power.

(Because she spends so much time mixed up in questionable scientific research etc you'd think her 'Doctor Waller' was because she's in STEM, but no. Polisci.)

Also more like a normal person and less like Batman, she is not particularly hung up on protecting other people from suffering the way she did, except on the most abstract level where if the world is reordered to her schema, this will stop the Bad Things.

I love this. I love how much of a brass-bound bitch she is. How impossible she is to intimidate or convince to look 'up' to anyone ever. Every time we get to see Waller up against some objectively more powerful baddie and she cleans their clock or just ruins their day I am hooting and hollering. She's fantastic.

But. Just like with Lex Luthor, it is very important that she also sucks. She's selfish. She overreaches herself. Her plans get the people who trust her killed; she cannot resist taking advantage of her position for personal advancement--never anything as trite as embezzlement, either, it's always about power.

She has taken the Suicide Squad down with her so many times and yet she keeps getting appointed to head it up again because she Has Experience (and other people who try to do the job tend to rapidly get eaten by a sharkman or whatever), which is not exactly realistic but it's an exaggerated parody of how management positions do tend to work, so it feels believable.

She has so much contempt for supervillains, and yet whenever it comes down to the punch she falls into the lure of that same megalomania, and then things blow up in her face.

Is there something distinctly Problematic about the character whose destiny is to be repeatedly destroyed by her own hubris in seeking access to specifically institutional power a black woman? Little bit, yeah. But it also works so fucking well specifically because her lack of perspective about when she's gone too far becomes so much more sympathetic, when you know just from looking at her how many bullshit barriers she had to burst through to get where she is.

Anyway I always get excited when she's in things.

[lyrisnightblood]

Dear "lovely" "canon Jiang Cheng Stans",

I see what you're doing here. I can see y'all talk about "book meta" and "writing Jiang Cheng as canonically accurate" and you know what?

Y'all are doing a fantastic job, keep it up 😍🎉

Yeah really! I mean it!

Y'all are doing a fantastic job showcasing just how utterly pathetic y'all are, how chronically online y'all are, and most importantly, y'all are doing a marvellous job showcasing your hate boner for a fictional character you claim to hate and is an "antagonist".

Keep up the lovely work y'all, show the world how you lack an ounce of reading comprehension, you booktok obsessed peeps!

And while you're at it, let me go spittin' facts, straight from the book.

Jiang Yanli is dead. End of the story. You can fantasize to your heart's content about how "she'll react to JC raising her son" and get your pants in a twist about all the bad things she'll supposedly say, but that's just it. You can only imagine it.

You know why?

Hmm idk cos she's fucking dead and no one knows what the dead wants?

This is exactly like "Don't do this your mother wouldn't have wanted this of you" "don't talk like you know my mother she's dead and i don't know what she wanted cos she's dead"

Well

I should've expected such callous behaviour from antis 🤷

Admit it, y'all wanted Wei Wuxian to raise Jin Ling huh? C'mon, don't be shy🥰 you can say that

Except your fave never could've raised Jin Ling cos 1) as if the Jin Sect would let their Sect heir be raised by the jianghu's most wanted person (Gasp, "wEi wUxIaN sLaNdEr" love check your books even wwx acknowledges that fact lolll) and 2) how tf could a dead man, no less a man who's soul got ripped into shards, take care of a baby?

"but Jin Guangyao was a better parental figure, and an actual parent"

Yeah, a parent who killed his own child cos he was worried about his reputation (I can already smell y'all coming at me to defend him like chill, I only said the truth, and yes, man was more worried about people knowing he married his sister and losing position than the life of his own son, just because he loved Rusong didn't change the fact that he was ready to go to the extreme). Not to mention how Jin Guangyao held a string to his own nephew's neck and threatened to kill him to save his skin while it was Jiang Cheng who begged him to let Jin Ling go

Betcha Jiang Yanli's ghost is watching the scene while sipping tea and praising Jin Guangyao huh

"but one of Jin Zixuan's cousin-"

Jin Zixun is dead. And is a truly despicable person. Or did you forget how he insulted Wei Wuxian left and right?

Oh wait. Of course you forgot, "criticizing" Jiang Cheng takes precedence! My bad, i should've known!

Let me stop y'all before you say "Jin Guangshan". You must be the utterly worst person in the planet to want a known womanizer and child abuser and rapist to raise a child. IDC Jin Guangshan is related to Jin Ling. Y'all just want a known abuser and sexual predator to raise Jin Ling just say you don't give two cents about the poor boy except when you want to hate on Jiang Cheng 🙄

"what about Jin Furen"

Yeah what about her? Or did you forget how she canonically had a role to play in Jin Ling's upbringing?

Who do you think is responsible for Jin Ling spending half a year in Lotus Pier? Certainly not Jin Guangyao!

If there was one person in the Jin Sect who could have enough sway to ensure that her own grandson is spending a significant amount of time in another sect, it's Jin Furen.

Three guesses why she did that?

Lol you actually thought I'd wait for your guess? LMFAOOOOO you're so cute 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

She did that because Jin Furen cared for A-Li and - wait for it - A-Cheng!!!

Reread the books if you missed it, mmkay?

She was fond of Yu Ziyuan, and by extension her children, and post-SSC, she offered to support both of them on multiple occasions (which they declined because any political support from Jin Sect would've come with strings attached cos JGS😑)

Establishing the fact that Jin Furen cared for Jiang Cheng, she had agreed to Jin Ling spending half his time in Lotus Pier because she sensed that he was all Jiang Cheng had left, and vice versa.

Y'all also have utterly forgotten about the cruel way Jin Ling's paternal cousins have bullied him for being an orphan. Like, Koi Tower is supposed to be his home, and he was bullied to the point where Lotus Pier became his sanctuary.

"AHA! GOTCHA! QIN SU SHOULD'VE RAISED HIM!"

Laughing My Fricking Ass Off TM

My man Qin Su was RIGHT THERE! No one was stopping her from raising Jin Ling! She could've been the maternal figure Jin Ling needed! And no one would have questioned it, it was actually expected for that timeline.

Except.... Did she? Did she do anything to make Jin Ling feel loved? Has Jin Ling ever talked about his aunt the same way he talks about his uncles? Apart from the respect that he gives to her as his paternal uncle's wife, does Jin Ling refer to her fondly? Even once?

"Alright, your point?"

Why thank you for asking 💗😌

My point is that Jiang Cheng is canonically the best guardian for Jin Ling, and this conclusion comes AFTER analysing every other candidate.

And you know what?

I am absolutely right🎉💗🌸😻

Evidence?

Exhibit A: Jiang Cheng accompanying Jin Ling's nighthunt to look out for him but also keeps himself at a distance so that Jin Ling actually participates in the nighthunt

Exhibit B: Letting Fairy enter Lotus Pier despite the strict dog ban (which he had adhered to even after wwx died)

Exhibit C: Jin Ling never once flinches or looks scared when Jiang Cheng shows his temper and says "I'll break your legs", he knows his jiujiu is all bark but would never hurt him

Exhibit D: "how dare you hit me? Even my jiujiu had never hit me!" - Jin Ling to Wei Wuxian (who btw oh so casually hits Jin Ling as if it's a normal thing to hit a child💀)

Exhibit E: "A-Ling! Who made you cry?" - Jiang Cheng when he saw a crying Jin Ling. No admonishment. No Judgement. And certainly no anger directed at Jin Ling.

Exhibit F: Jin Ling being unafraid to cry in front of his jiujiu, he knows he won't be judged.

Exhibit G: Jiang Cheng saving Jin Ling on multiple occasions.

Exhibit H: Jiang Cheng begging Jin Guangyao to take him hostage and release Jin Ling, without hesitation, despite his spiritual energy being locked and being stabbed in the chest.

I could go on and on and on but unlike you lovely people who have no hobby other than slandering Jiang Cheng, I have TONS.

And also a life.

So, go fantasize about your Jiang Cheng hate boner elsewhere. I see your pathetic attempt at taking over the Canon Jiang Cheng tag and it ain't working.

Ciao 🤟

[smahell]

otaku fm sinful sounds - the disappointing reply to the fans' outcry.

this morning i wake up to a notification from the obey me! official channel - a new otaku fm episode? celebrations. fantastic. i'd been waiting ever since i saw a photo of kada and yamashita back in the iconic studio. we hadn't received a new otaku fm episode for roughly two years, and of course, when a new one is announced there's going to be expectations surrounding that. expectations that will originate from the previous seasons and episodes.

so after watching the one which came out today, i was just genuinely disappointed.

"that's it?? that's the episode?"

you might even notice that the episode doesn't stay loyal to its usual 35-45 minutes format. in fact, anime and chill had the longest episodes, and is what I'd call "peak obey me™". these episodes are half that length. and i'm expecting the newer ones to be even shorter.

sinful sounds (ss).. was never advertised to be as short as almost the otaku fm mini series with the side character's vas-

even worse? the twenty minute time frame was meant to be shorter. they went overtime.

i'd totally understand if it was labelled 'otaku fm mini - sinful sounds', but this was meant to be a return to formula. with the abundance of paid content coming from solmare recently, this was meant to be something that those without dispensable income could actually enjoy. yes, it was also stated that listening to the asmr would "make the episode that much better", but assuming that i'd enjoy it regardless is an overstatement. whether you listened to the audio drama or not, this was just a disappointing way of coercing people who don't use twitter to listen to it. and another disappointing reminder of what obey me has become.

be warned - i talk about the actual episode here. so maybe go listen to it first before reading on.

yes, hearing the voice actors come back.. of course i'd love that. that's one of the main reasons i wanted it to come back. they even acknowledge how long it's been since the last time they did, but then it goes straight into "what is ASMR??"

like.. the fanbase is full of deluded white women /j .. i think we all know what it is!!! i guess it's helpful nonetheless, but then they're like:

"let's listen to a clip!!!"

hey...what?!?

(and said clip takes up a good chunk of the episode..)

my point is.. it's not really them gisting about anything. the whole thing just feels scripted and stiff. i don't feel that liveliness that i feel from rewatching previous episodes. sure, yes, asmr is meant to be calming and relaxing.. but that's not what i think of otaku fm. they're spoonfeeding me a product like it's baby food.

it's just a 20 minute ad. really.

some could say "well duh, that was the point of otaku fm, to advertise obey me and give more fan content!!"

then tell me, genuinely. did this episode give you any fan content of the vas or character that you've either already heard before OR content that really satiated you.

let's use anime and chill as an example. the anime and chill series was made to advertise the anime, but they didn't spend all the time talking about it. and you didn't exactly need to have the money to watch the anime to enjoy the whole thing. the voice actors themselves are performers. they're used to taking the reins on a project and creating an entertaining experience, which is why even though a segment is based on asking one question, we learn so much about them on a personal level. if a radio episode can make me feel like i'm chatting with two friends, then its done its job. this episode felt like watching two unskippable ads in a row on youtube. end me.

for me it's bringing up the question - all this paid content might just turning more fans away rather than bringing more in. i'm suspecting they've ben losing money since the decline in popularity after lockdown.

it's just making me think, well, five years in the future, will obey me as a game even survive? because trust me, after this disappointing episode, i'm starting to turn to ex and bee as my lord and saviour.

this isn't a diss at the voice actors at all. they were told and paid to do this, and they've done it perfectly well. this is more at a poke at the higher up executives calling the shots for this. because it always is- /hj

think i'm the only one who hates it? read this other post from another person on youtube who's also another avid fan of the voice actors. i might be repeating one or two of their points, but i saw this before i ever listened to ss, and trust me, it was a red flag for what was to come.

again, i'm not making this post because "arghhh i hate solmare i hate the vas".. no. i'm doing this because i can see that in another universe, this new series could've been amazing. it just falls flat. and i feel like it will continue falling flat until the developers and higher-ups behind this game acknowledge the scraps and and shreds of a fanbase the game has left.. i'm disappointed.

before you even begin praise this episode, listen to every single episode featuring sumi shinya, miura ayme, and/or takuhei yamamoto, laugh your heart out, then come back to this post. and mourn what has been taken from you.

[oneatlatime]

The Earth King

As always, commentary off.

No. Sokka. No. Stop. This is your stupidest idea yet. I want to LEAVE Ba Sing Se.

Sokka. Listen to your sister. And your other sister.

Toph embodying my will manifested on screen.

What makes you think the Earth King is going to listen to four teens and their fluffy dog? When I put it that way, this is Scooby Doo. Scooby Doo plus Momo. Does that make Momo Scrappy Doo?

We're going back to Ba Sing Se. Great. Yay. I'm so excited.

It is rapidly becoming apparent that Sokka has lost his mind.

Surface to air rocks is funny. I'll give it to them, that's good.

This fight scene music is fantastic.

Aang took a level in badass at some point without my noticing.

I know these hats are inspired by real historical hats, and so I really shouldn't make fun, but these look like the lovechild of a toilet brush and a feather duster.

This fight is majority Toph and Katara. RIP the egos of these several hundred Earth Kingdom soldiers.

Please ensure your fluffy little butt is securely stored in the overhead bins before takeoff.

There's no way these guys are still alive. This is what was done to Jet, doubled. They dead.

The girl who doesn't even want to be here is doing all the work. Typical.

My congratulations to Toph, Katara, and Aang for demolishing an army without breaking a sweat. If only season 1 Katara could see you guys now.

I said in my previous write up that Zuko doing something good always comes back to bite him. I didn't mean it this literally. Did he have to take the jug out with him, or was that for the drama?

Good job guys!

Soka steals my job and points out the fulfillment of the Beat Up Sokka quota.

His earthiness has an interesting set of priorities.

So... is this episode just going to be talking?

He brainwashed your friend? Did you miss that he killed him too?

I said in my last write up that Long Feng was Avatar's first competent villain, but the tone he takes with the Earth King is so unsubtle that I'm thinking of rescinding that claim. Unless the King is so dumb that subtlety isn't required?

Toothprints. Sokka the idea guy coming in clutch. Too bad his brain wasn't engaged at the start of the episode.

Appa is a herbivore. Confirmed. Although he should have fangs for aesthetic reasons. Fanged Appa would be metal.

This king is a confusing mixture of endearing and infuriating.

No mere fever will prevent me from doing mundane actions in the most dramatic way possible!

Way back in the 90s there was a print ad for Chevy trucks that I remember seeing in magazines. It had a shirtless guy in jeans sitting on the bed of his truck in a field, pouring a bucket of water over himself. It was kind of at sunset and had a very late summer vibe. I had completely forgotten about it until I saw Zuko's bucket shenanigans in this scene, at which point I was abruptly -ABRUPTLY- reminded of how much time little me spent staring at that ad.

OH MY GOD. The King doesn't know about trains!!! BLASPHEMY.

Huh. So the King isn't stupid, he's just horrifically naive.

Positive attitude Sokka is kind of frightening. I do not like.

If I told this King that I had a bunch of puppies in my windowless van, he would totally fall for it. So much about the Earth Kingdom suddenly makes sense.

That one guard is having a doozy of a day.

Did the King just show a smidge of self-awareness? Wasn't expecting that.

Who is this? I have no idea who this is. I didn't realise how integral the scar was to the character's design. Give it back.

Yikes. A bunch of shmymbolism. I suck epically at decoding shmymbolism unless it's really spoon fed to me, so I'm not even going to try to understand this dream beyond 'poor guy has a really bad fever.'

Has anyone seen the Spencer Tracy movie Father of the Bride? There's a bit where he has a dream that the floor on the way to the altar does pretty much exactly this. Hungry floors must be a common dream experience.

Pretty.

If the King is really this completely ignorant of the war, who's been directing the army?

It's pretty neat that Sokka is the spokesperson of Team Avatar, and that no one disputes that.

Aang says "there's a comet coming this summer," but I heard "comic" and I know they made tie in comics for the show, so I was like "ooh a crossover episode!"

"You're already vulnerable. The Fire Nation won't stop until the Southern Water Tribe falls. You can either sit back and wait for that to happen, or take the offensive, and give yourself a fighting chance." -Sokka's dad speaking to the men of the Southern Water Tribe, while his son listens perhaps a bit too closely.

If the King really was completely in the dark about the war, how does he even know who the General is? Did Long Feng have the power to keep the General from mentioning the war?

"Your majesty I'm General How, head of the Council of Five." "What's that?" "It's in charge of your army." "Right. And what's the army up to these days?" ... " ...I planted a lovely tomato garden this year."

I love that earthbenders don't wear shoes, and that it's culturally normal. Makes an intriguing visual contrast to their fancy duds.

I have GOT to know what Mushi the teamaker's secret file says.

Toph can't read guys.

Sokka, Katara, I get it. You miss home too. But how would anyone at all from your tribe know to send a message for you to Ba Sing Se? Last time you all touched base, you were headed to the Northern Water Tribe. And those guys sent you off to Omashu, not Ba Sing Se.

Nitpick time! Katara starts reading the text of this letter out loud before she unrolls it.

Katara's voice acting while she's reading the letter is sweet. She's so excited.

Iroh. Priorities. Tea can wait.

"Huh? What's happening?" "You huffed a bit too much cave slime under Lake Laogai. Just ride it out."

This vase is lit like a main character.

"You're going through a metamorphosis my nephew." Iroh, he's a bit too old for that talk. Hang on I just realised that Zuko went through puberty on that ship. I bet that was rough.

I don't trust this. This news is all too good.

Aang referring to them all as "the family" hurts a little bit.

It is unbearably sweet to let Sokka go see their dad while Katara helps the Earth Kingdom plan, but Katara sucks at planning. Then again, the Earth Kingdom sucks in general, so maybe having a sucky planner will be a net improvement?

Either way it's good little sister content.

But there are six Kyoshi warriors. I counted in Appa's Lost Days.

Oh they didn't

Attack hug!

Airbender Zuko is a very effective jumpscare. Don't blame him for freaking out.

You know it's bad when finding the scar intact comes as a relief.

Nope. Don't trust it.

Fuck this guy.

Long Feng even eats rocks maliciously.

Fuck these guys.

Oh they did. Fuck these guys.

Final Thoughts

And just like that, it all went to shit. Or it will.

I was braced to be annoyed by how conveniently quickly the Earth King got with the program, but it actually fits well into the rest of the episode. Instead of a thing that goes improbably well, it's the one thing that goes right in episode filled with set up for everything falling apart. That bothers me less.

This episode was actually fun. At least until the end. It was mostly talking and Zuko on a bad trip. But it was win after win for everyone but my Ba Sing Se hating self, and it's always good to see your favourites having a good day. But! I have a glimmer of hope! So long as Sokka and Aang aren't completely written out until they return to Ba Sing Se, at some point I'll get some episodes outside of the city. And I have Appa back, so things aren't too bad in the grand scheme of things. I wonder that Appa wasn't upset at having all his people back for five minutes then having them split up again.

I do not like positive thinking Sokka, and I especially don't like that I have no idea where he came from. That point wasn't set up at all. I want my baby cynic back.

If letting Appa go was enough to trigger Zuko's morality crisis to the point of physical illness, why didn't letting Aang go in The Blue Spirit, or choosing to chase after Iroh rather than the Gaang in The Winter Solstice Part 1, cause a similar illness? What is different about this time?

Toph was once again the voice of reason in this episode, or rather my personal audience insert. Although it did surprise me how excited she was to see her mom. I thought that sending bounty hunters after their own daughter was kind of unforgivable, but either Toph doesn't know, or she's a more forgiving person than I am.

I realise now that this should have occurred to me when I watched Appa's Lost Days, but what idiot didn't take the Danger Ladies into custody when the Drill was stopped? btw I keep calling them the PowerPuff Girls in my head.

This episode was simultaneously a finale to a lot of threads and an introduction to a lot more. It was a chance to breathe between crossing the finish line of the 'find Appa' quest and starting the 'season finale' quest. It was also structured backwards. The big fight was like six minutes in. The 'what are we doing this episode?' was one of the last scenes. But it still works. I'll be interested to see what I think of this one when I rewatch it. It was such an info dump that I wonder if my opinion of it will be different once I watch it with all of the relevant facts known to me already. Either I'll appreciate the episode's other parts like the comedy, or I'll be bored. We'll see.

Two episodes left this season! I don't think I'll be getting to those before next year. See you all in 2024! (time needs to slow way down)

[amber-angel]

Okay! I saw Les Mis performed by the current US cast with my roommate a few days ago, and I wanted to share some of the details that I liked (this is going to be long). Some of these I wrote down during intermission, some are things I remembered after, so some stuff is a little less specific. Also this will be two parts

PETIT GERVAIS! I gasped at this part, such a good detail to include

Valjean can SING, that high note on "24601" during Who Am I was incredible, the breath control is evident. His RANGE

Fantine's voice was amazing. I Dreamed a Dream was so good, and Haley Dortch owned that stage. Every song that had Fantine was a good song, and I had tears in my eyes during her death scene

Lovely Ladies was beautiful, the woman in the red dress has a pretty voice and the staging worked really well

I think there was a detail during the scene between Fantine and the guy who tries to get her arrested that I liked, something about the way Haley Dortch sang it, but I can't remember it exactly, sorry

I loved Valjean's "my race is not yet run" (he did a vocal run) during the confrontation, and his harmony with Javert was so satisfying

Little Cosette was so good, loved the detail of little Eponine mocking her melody and that the Thenardiers harmonized with her as Valjean walked her back, I don't think I've seen that done before, and it worked really well

Thenardier saying something (I didn't catch it, I think it was "die"? Not their fault, I'm hard of hearing) to Cosette and her just going limp was hilarious

Valjean and Cosette bowing to each other and dancing was adorable

Madame Thenardier has great comedic chops, loved her bits, especially in Master of the House. And of course Thenardier himself was hugely entertaining

ENJOLRAS

SIR

HE CAN SING. I can't even describe it better than that. Devin Archer teach me your secrets please

Kyle Adams hi. The way he plays Grantaire feels so real. There was a lot of coat swooshing and looking at Enjolras. The amount of tiny details and things that just he was doing makes me want to have this show with this cast imprinted in my mind so I can rewind and watch every person on stage individually

There will be more Grantaire details in part 2 (he's one of my favorite characters, so I did pay attention to him more)

Marius was great, his little "tease..." when Eponine threw his book was funny and endearing. Jake David Smith had some really good moments where he turned lines into a funny bit ("I'm doing everything all wrong") or a moment to make the audience connect with the character

Sometimes it can come across like Marius doesn't actually care all that much about Eponine, but Jake David Smith and Mya Rena Hunter did a fantastic job of showing real affection towards each other. All the props to them

I love, love, love the character details, the fact that they're evident in the performances says so much about this incredible cast

Also the set design was absolutely perfect, One Day More with Valjean in one balcony and the Thenardiers in the other looked amazing. I loved how much even the pieces that are usually just backdrop or setting were used in the staging

Also also the costumes were beautiful. I especially liked Cosette's dress and the outfits for the wedding

My roommate liked Javert's hat a lot

[darcytaylor]

My thoughts on Season 3 of Bridgerton

I have been trying to word exactly how I feel about Season 3 of Bridgerton.

From reading what other people have said it seems like there are mixed reviews.

I will say this right now - I really did enjoy my time watching it. I think Nicola and Luke did a great job at portraying Penelope and Colin.

I think part 1 and part 2 have completely different vibes and I can see why they accepted the 2 part release. It gave the viewers more time to digest everything and to appreciate the first 4 episodes.

But I also think (for that very reason) it hindered the season as a whole because it seemed to me that I was watching 2 different seasons of Bridgerton. They left the rom-com elements in part 1 and didn't look back, and went straight for drama. (I do love some drama in a television show though)

Maybe if it was released all together it would have flowed a bit better because I wouldn't have been searching for the rom-com lightheartedness, that I saw in part 1. I would have accepted that the drama was about to happen and happy to say goodbye to the rom-com vibes.

Having been able sit with part 1 for so long and really appreciate all that the first 4 episodes had to offer, part 2 seemed to be a bit confusing.

One of my favourite parts of part 2 were the moments that Colin was angry at Penelope. I think Luke did a fantastic job at portraying someone who was in love and angry at the same time. I said this before and I'll say it again, his eye/face acting is on point!

Nicola and Luke had mentioned before that Penelope and Colin finally open all of themselves to each other, that's how they were able to make their relationship work and become partners.

I loved seeing them not be ashamed to confess their love with each other, it was heartwarming seeing Penelope take of her shield and not hide. That was the main take-away from part 2, Penelope revealing all sides of herself, to everyone around her.

She spent her whole life in the shadows and she was now stepping "into the light". That is why it had to be Penelope confessing she was Lady Whistledown, unlike in the books. That is why they needed to reveal she was Lady Whistledown to the Ton.

Whistledown was her shield that protected her, but she completely stripped that away and let herself protect herself. It was beautiful to watch and Nicola smashed it.

Do I think that some of the background stories were a bit dragged out? Yes. I don't think they needed all of the threesome scenes of Benedict. I didn't mind him becoming more aware of himself and having the threesome. I think most of us were waiting since Season 1 to finally see it happen! But I think they showed 1 scene too many of it and it became tiresome, it didn't feel like it was enhancing his story/character, by the last threesome scene.

I really loved the direction they took for Francesca. You can see that she walks to the beat of her own drum. She is guarded but at the same time so open. If that makes sense. I think that her season will be one to look out for, for sure! Especially since we now know that her story will have the LGBTQ+ storyline. Mikaela Stirling! YES! It actually made me gasp and smile when watching them introduce her.

As for the Eloise storyline, I think Claudia did a fantastic job at portraying hurt and love and wanting the best for people even if you are mad at them. I love the fact that it took so long for Eloise to begin to forgive Penelope. It seemed more real that way.

I know people didn't love the way that she befriended Cressida and how she seemed to listen to her. But she needed that friendship to understand why her friendship with Penelope was special. To see how a person can be the way they are because of the people who raised them. To see that bad people can do good things and good people can do bad things.

So my final thoughts, I loved the season as a whole. It made me smile, laugh, be angry, hopeful, cry. It did everything I would want a television show to do.

Were there some issues. Of course. There really aren't a lot of television shows that I would say are perfect (I have 1 but I'm not going there).

I look forward to watching more seasons and to see what ALL of the actors do in the meantime.

[captainsy-cookiemonster]

Random Escaped Audios character headcanons (semi domestic... Idk?)

Escaped and Jean sleep with socks on, a habit they picked up in prison.

Escaped also sleeps with the mask on sometimes. And only in his boxers... And socks. Sexy. Seductive, even. 😂

Jean sleeps in whatever he wore that day minus the pants. Crinkled dress shirts all the way. (if he even gets sleep that is) On really bad days, before the intern, he just threw on pants the next day and was ready to go. (yes he did shower... But he put his old clothes back on)

Precious baby boy Ivan (actually adorable dilf... ESCAPED NO YOU DID NOT SEE THAT!!!😳) sleeps in matching pyjama sets and even got some for Raven and Paloma so they all three can match! of course the pj's are bird themed!

Now that I'm on a "what they wear to bed" trip... Alphonso does the classic t-shirt and boxers combo, jogging pants if he's cold. Plus a hoodie if he's really cold. Which is rare. Or... Well... His slayer uniform.

Benji does the t-shirt boxer combo too. All year. He mostly wears his old college (or band👀) tees to sleep.

You cannot convince me Crow "i don't have use for t-shirts" doesn't (didn't 😢) sleep butt ass naked. Either that or fully... Clothed? As clothed as he is. Leather harness shoulder bracer and all. There's no in between.

Enough of the sleep hc's... 🙈 Onto the random stuff

Nap dates with Jean!

Escaped has a sweet tooth. Also LOVES home cooked meals. After all the junk in prison, he loves the times in between where he gets to eat real food. If he could choose between take out or home cooked it's home cooked all the way. (one of the goons is a fantastic cook)

He misses his mom's food, though.

Escaped does finger guns all. The fucking. Time. Like...🧍‍♂️... 👉👉...🧍‍♂️

Alsoooo... Escaped and spiderman kisses!

I have many feelings about our slutty villain soo... He's a cuddler. Big time. Won't admit it, but likes being the little spoon (kinda mentioned in the audio). Will also lie on top of you if he catches you lying around, and put his head on your tiddies or tummy.

Crow has one of those photo calendars on his desk. It's with cats. Doesn't use it for calendar stuff... Only has it for the pictures. Gets new ones every year but keeps the old ones in a drawer in his desk.

Benji, our precious marine biologist (yes shh i know it's not exactly his job), is the same but with sea animals.

Also... Benji makes mixtapes. Not just early into the relationship, but also after he got married. It's his anniversary gift. Literally spends all year compiling a playlist, and a movie watchlist for datenights!

Picnic beach dates with Benji!

And forest or bird watching dates with Ivan (birbs☺��)

Also 100% convinced Ivan manages to befriend the crows he's feeding & playing with and they bring him gifts in return.

Jean likes his hair to be played with. (shout out to @stupd000 for saying he likes having his hair pulled🙈)

He also learns more songs on the ukulele and he and the intern sing together. Not very well, but it's cute. When the singing gets too bad, one would just kiss the other to shut them up.

Alphonso keeps souvenirs of the places he visits on hunts and keeps them in his room at the slayers' stronghold when he's there.

Jean is a bit jittery from all the coffee he drinks. Goes through withdrawl after escaping the mafia. But now he's down to the normal amount of coffee for a day (like... 2-4 cups a day)

Ivan will come and wrap his arms around your waist and rest his head on your (Raven's) shoulder while you two cook together. Will steal bits of food, too.

Ivan does wood carvings sometimes. He carved a little raven for Raven. Paloma painted it hot pink, she's very proud of it!

Once at safety, Jean adopts a stray dog... which turn into three.

Ivan will totally bring home injured animals (especially, ofc, birds) and nurse them back to health.

Okay I think that's all I can come up with for now

[queen--kenobi]

Like a Cigarette (Drag Out, Never Quit) Part I

My entry in @hotd-bigbang for this year! The header, dividers, and the moodboard are all done by the wonderfully talented @ewanmitchellcrumbs

Fic summary

When the Greens realized Rhaenyra invaded King's Landing, Elayna, Aemond's wife and mother of his children, was among those who fled. Not trusting Larys, Elayna had made a plan with Tyland Lannister should the worst ever occur. Seven months later, freshly widowed Elayna and Tyland return to King's Landing. The pair of Westerlanders grew close in the intervening months, making many wonder what happened. King Aegon II decides to see for himself exactly how close the pair became.

Chapter summary: Having made their way back to King's Landing, Elayna has to deal with some personal matters.

Warnings: heavy discussions of grief, character death (not in fic), lots of angst. NSFT (m!receiving oral, f!receiving oral, PiV, some praise kink, and previous D/s dynamics referenced.) Also, dub-con. They both are given an out, but it's still there.

Word count: ~10.3k

Part 1 of 3

A/N: Thank you to both @emilykaldwen and @/ewanmitchellcrumbs for doing this year! I had a lot of fun with this, and y'all did a fantastic job putting this on.

Elayna closes her eyes. 

Despite her exhaustion, she can't seem to find sleep. Every jolt of the carriage shakes her awake. The movements aren't what keep her from sleep but what they might do; the thought of her twins waking up is almost enough to bring her to tears. It took far too long to get either of them down for a nap. In theory, she knows she could give them to someone else. In practice, the idea terrifies her. An almost animalistic fear hits her at the thought of someone else handling them. 

Aelon and Reynard are all she has left of Aemond, left of her old life. She'll be damned if she lets someone take that from her.

“You can go to sleep. I'll wake you if they do.” Elayna cracks one eye open at the sound of Tyland’s voice. He sits across the carriage from her. He could have chosen to ride with everyone else, but he chose to stay with her. 

“I cannot ask that of you. You have already done far too much for me.”

Elayna wouldn't be alive if it weren't for Tyland. The twins wouldn't be alive if it weren't for him. If he hadn't managed to sneak her out of King's Landing just before Rhaenyra took the city, all three of them would be dead, and it wouldn't be a swift or painless death. 

Aemond killed Rhaenyra's son. 

Killing his wife and two unborn children would be one of the first thing Rhaenyra sought to do. Elayna cannot find fault with the logic; she would do the same for her children. 

The carriage jostles almost violently. Elayna lowers her head to look at the twins, missing Tyland pursing his lips together at her statement. Aelon opens his eyes. Panic surges through Elayna. If he begins to cry, Reynard will surely wake as well. She tries to carefully adjust Aelon, wanting to better cradle him if he should start to cry. The adrenaline coursing through her combined with her exhaustion makes her movements sloppy, jostling the twins more than the carriage.

“Elayna...”

“Don't!” She snaps instantly. Elayna winces when she hears her tone. She tries her best to soften the edges when she opens her mouth again. “I... I know you mean well, but I. I cannot . I will not let anyone else take care of them.”

“At the expense of yourself?” Elayna frowns. She glares at Tyland across the carriage. It's all sheer emotions mixed with sleep deprivation; no true ill will sits in her gaze. Tyland doesn't flinch; he stares back at her evenly. “You can't keep going like this.”

“It doesn't matter if I can or not. I must.”

He sighs. Elayna looks away, cradling Aelon closer to her. One part of her brain sees how emotional and illogical she's being, but the majority of her brain refuses to look at it.

“I know you're right. But. How do I know she won't hurt them?” Elayna's voice cracks slightly at the last word. She swallows and clears her throat in an attempt to disguise it. Tears begin to collect along her waterline without permission. “I couldn't trust before, but now. How can I? How can I trust anyone to not hurt them?”

Her voice rises an octave without her permission. She slaps her hand over her mouth in an attempt to push the words back inside her body, but it's too late. The increased desperation in her tone finally triggers Aelon. He lets out a piercing wail. 

The wave crests, and each member of Elayna’s family falls.

Aelon's wail causes the trapped sob in Elayna’s chest to burst violently from her. She has no idea if it's in solidarity or if it's because the sound of Aelon's crying makes her want to scream. Upon hearing both his mother and brother crying, Reynard joins. The look of alarm on Tyland’s face would be funny in almost any other circumstances. 

“Elayna...” 

Elayna tries. She tries to tell him she's fine, she's okay, she just needs a moment. All that comes out is a choked noise and then an unholy wail. Her cries mix with those of her babies. Tyland's eyes go wide. He opens his mouth to say something, most likely words of comfort, but nothing comes out. Elayna curls around both Aelon and Reynard.

A soft hand on her shoulder nearly makes her jump. Tyland sits beside her. His expression is equal parts alarm and concern. His fingers flex and curl, as if he's not sure if touching her is the right move. Elayna buries her face into his shoulder. Tyland stiffens at the contact. Elayna opens and closes her mouth, trying to assure him she's fine, it's fine. Nothing comes out. 

“There, there.” Tyland rubs her back very awkwardly. He clears his throat. She hears three thumps on the carriage door. She feels the jolt as the carriage stops. Elayna wants to push away from Tyland in case people look in on them, but she doesn't have the energy. Instead, she pulls Aelon and Reynard closer while pressing herself further into Tyland.

The door to the carriage opens. Elayna panics. The thought of someone seeing her like this sends an intense spike of panic through her. She tried to push away, but Tyland keeps the one hand on her shoulders. She can't hear what he says to the servant who opens the door.

Elayna hears other voices. One of them gives soft commands. Tyland occasionally speaks, but she can't hear it because of the noise in her head and wails coming from her. Eventually, two other voices join, this time feminine. Elayna lifts her head from Tyland’s shoulder. 

“No. No!” She shakes her head violently and clutches Aelon and Reynard closer to her.

“Elayna. Elayna!” Tyland takes a gentle hold of her shoulders. “It's okay. ‘Tis okay.”

“I don't. I don't want them to!” Elayna's voice cracks as it reaches a new octave. Tyland brings one hand to her face.

“ ‘Tis okay. It's okay. They're not going to hurt them. Aelon and Reynard will be fine.” Tyland wipes some of the tears from her face. “They will be watched. The nurse maids will have others around them. No one will hurt them. I swear.”

Elayna stares at him, her lip wobbles even more. Tyland clears his throat. 

“You need to let them. You can't do this by yourself.”

“But I-”

“We'll call for them once you've calmed down.”

Tyland's logic makes sense. It goes against every instinct in her body, but it makes sense. She stares at him. Tyland’s movements are stiff and hesitant as rubs her back. 

“Okay. Okay.”

She tries to stay calm as she carefully hands over Aelon and Reynard to the nurse maids. Both wail even louder when she passes them; it takes all of her self-control to not fall apart again hearing them. 

It isn't until the carriage door closes again and she and Tyland are left alone that she lets herself break down once more. 

This time, Tyland seems to expect it. He holds her, at first clearly unsure if he should. When she grabs the collar of his doublet, collapsing into him as she sobs, he pulls her closer. He doesn't say anything, just holds her in his arms and rubs a small circle on her back. The gesture brings more tears. Her body feels so heavy. 

She's tired. She's so so so tired. Her entire being feels like a giant lead weight. The more she cries, the more sheer exhaustion creeps upon her. Elayna splits apart at the seams, everything finally too much to handle.

She wakes up warm.

Elayna sighs. She vaguely registers the sound of the carriage rolling over cobblestone now, the clack of horse's hooves against them. She turns her head with a grunt. Her left cheek slides against silk as she tries to bury her face. A light, soft sensation rests on her right cheek and neck. 

The fabric doesn't give. 

It takes Elayna a moment to realize the reason as to why. Her sleep addled mind slowly arrives at the conclusion. She struggles to open one eye, crusty from the salt in her tears. Red silk greets her first then a moss green velvet. Sluggishly, she tilts her head upward. In her periphery, she notices her head rests in the crook of someone's neck. She sees the lines of a jaw with a blond beard.

“Tyland...?”

Tyland’s eyes flick down to look at her.

“We should arrive at the Keep soon.” Elayna becomes aware of his arm around her, his hand resting on her shoulder. His hands seem broad against her. She idly admires his fingers. She wonders what his hands would look like against her bare skin, what colors bruises in the shape of his fingers would take. 

“How long was I asleep?” Words float in and out of her brain. She lets her eyes close again. 

“Half the day. I've kept Aelon and Reynard with us as much as I could.”

At the mention of her children, Elayna's eyes fly open. Before Elayna can even try to sit up, Tyland quickly reassures her.

“They're in here with us.”

Elayna still pushes herself up to look at the space. The sight makes Elayna's shoulders drop. She lets out a deep breath before slowly letting herself settle back down. Her head finds Tyland’s shoulder once more. 

She should be worried what people might think if they saw the two of them. She shouldn't let herself relax. She needs to be on guard.

Instead, Elayna closes her eyes. 

The two of them stay like that for a long moment, Elayna's head on Tyland’s shoulder and Tyland’s arm around her. At some point, Tyland’s hold moves. His arm rests loosely around her waist. Elayna sighs. She nestles closer to him, almost instinctively, at the change in positioning. They sit in silence. Elayna listens to the sounds of the horse's hooves and the creaking of the carriage. She listens to the soft rise and fall of her breath, of the twins's breath, of Tyland’s breath. She listens intently to a moment of peace she might never get again.

After a while, Elayna sighs. While she enjoyed the blissful break from the realities of her situation, she has to clean up the pieces. 

“ ‘m sorry.” She manages. “For earlier. I didn't mean to... cause concern.”

Tyland sighs. It's not necessarily at her but more world weary.

“I imagine being a widow with two babes is difficult.” Tyland looks down at her. “You have help. Use it. Not everyone means you harm.”

Elayna doesn't say anything for a long moment. Instead, she stares ahead. He's somewhat right; not everyone means to harm her but enough people do she cannot risk it. The truth of the matter is the minute she married Aemond, both herself and any children they had were in danger. It wouldn't have mattered who won, she and her children were always going to be on the chopping block. They didn't afford any decency to Aegon and Helaena's children, why would hers be any different? If anything, Aelon and Reynard were more in harm's way, given Aemond's actions. Elayna tries to find the words to explain this, but they stay stuck inside her mouth.

“They're all I have.” She whispers. It's the closest thing she can come to getting him to understand.

“And they will have nothing if you continue on like this.” He counters. Elayna swallows. “They're children of a Prince. Aegon won't let anything happen to his nephews.”

Tears threaten to fall again. She doesn't try to fight them this time. Instead, she lets them fall. This time, her body grants her the mercy of them being silent.

“I... I know that. But ‘tis hard.”

Tyland stays silent. She fights to keep her gaze forward, not wanting him to know how much just saying those words aloud hurt her. 

“Do you trust me?”

Elayna lets out a humorless little giggle. Tyland stiffens, but Elayna quickly turns her head up to look at him. 

“Of course I do.” She smiles at him. The motion almost feels foreign to her. “If I didn't, I would have had your head for seeing me cry.”

Tyland raises an eyebrow at her. Elayna stares evenly back at him.

" 'Tis a joke!"

"I somehow doubt that." Before Elayna can react, he clears his throat. "Nothing will happen to them. I promise."

Elayna buries her face back into his shoulder. She wants to tell him he's too kind to her, but the words won't come. Instead, she presses herself more into his side.

They stay like that, Elayna's head in the crook of Tyland’s neck and his arm around her waist, until they reach the gates of the Red Keep.

Everything feels off, almost to the point of being tangible. She can almost taste something acrid and mournful in the air.

The greeting party was small; Aegon cannot move much without being in pain so his absence was expected. Queen Alicent, however, did not come out to see them. Elayna was under the impression she would until she was later informed Alicent doesn't leave her chambers for much of anything anymore.

She understands.

Elayna often thanks the Seven the twins were born before the news of Aemond's death reached her. She has no idea what the devastating news would have done to the twins if they were still inside her belly. Even then, it almost killed them. In the days after, Elayna stayed in bed all day, only getting out of bed to feed Aelon and Reynard. The thought of doing anything more hurt her deeply. It took both Johanna and Tyland to coax Elayna not just out of bed but out of her chambers. Guilt still eats at Elayna; Johanna had her own losses yet Elayna selfishly took all the space to mourn. 

Perhaps the sight of Alicent's two new grandchildren may do the Dowager Queen good. Elayna tells herself this as she carries the twins to Alicent's chambers. When the guards open the doors, and Elayna sees Alicent, Elayna almost gasps.

She doesn't recognize the woman before her.

Alicent's curly hair sits tangled, almost in mats. Her eyes are sunken, red rimmed from crying. She almost curls in on herself, any and all previous confidence long gone from her body. Elayna hurts. She physically aches looking at Alicent.

“Your Grace.” Elayna steps forward. Alicent finally looks up to Elayna. She looks so much older than the last time Elayna saw her. 

“Elayna.” Alicent's voice lifts with relief, but she doesn't smile. “You're alive.”

“Aye. Thanks to Ser Tyland.” Elayna clears her throat. “I am not the only one alive thanks to him. Your grandchildren are as well.”

The news of two grandchildren doesn't take all of the sorrow away from her, but it visibly puts more life into Alicent. She almost perks up. Her eyes brighten.

“Grandchildren...? You were with twins?” Alicent carefully stands up. Delight creeps into her voice, the delight of a mother learning they're a grandmother. At the sound, Aelon lets out a pleased giggle. Reynard coos softly.

“If I may present Aelon and Reynard...”

Alicent makes her way over to Elayna. Elayna gently maneuvers Aelon out of his sling as she approaches. Alicent stops just short of Elayna, as if waiting for permission. It almost seems as if she thinks Elayna will tell her no. Instead, Elayna cradles Aelon and hands him to her.

“This is Aelon.”

“Aelon.” Alicent repeats. She takes a moment to study him. Elayna watches as Alicent notices how light Aelon's hair is and how his nose matches Aemond's. Alicent looks up. Tears threaten to fall. “He looks like his father.”

Elayna does her the courtesy of pretending to not notice the slight break in Alicent's voice. 

“He does. But he has my temperament. Nothing is ever quite right for him.” The subtle jab at herself makes Alicent shake her head. Elayna turns to Reynard. “This one looks like me, but I think he shall take after his father.”

Elayna lifts Reynard from his sling with a grunt. She cradles him close to her chest, positioning him so Alicent can look at his face.

“He has your hair but Aemond's eyes.” Alicent remarks almost absent-mindedly. Aelon babbles in her arms, a plea for attention. Alicent shifts him. He quickly grabs onto her hand with one of his own small and pudgy fists. Alicent almost smiles. Her face relaxes some, the harsh lines on her face easing up as she does so. Her eyes brighten a bit at the same time. Yet she still doesn't smile.

Elayna doubts Alicent ever will again. 

Elayna steps close to her. Reynard reaches out to clasp one of the many strands of hair free of Alicent's braids. He looks at her, eyes wide. 

“I...” Elayna begins. She pauses to take a deep breath. “Is it silly one of my wishes is I could have told Aemond we had twins?” Elayna wants to look at Alicent and meet her eyes, but she can't. All the strength to lift up her head leaves her body. Instead, she reaches across to smooth out one of Aelon's hairs.

“No.” Alicent manages. “No, ‘tis not.”

Elayna inhales shakily. This time, her head begins to hurt before her eyes water. 

“I hope they become men their father would be proud of.”

Elayna's words make Alicent break first. She lets out a choked sob, placing her free hand delicately over her mouth. Elayna presses her lips together and averts her eyes. 

“I... I miss him.” Elayna confesses. “I miss him so much.”

Alicent lets out a strangled sob, a noise Elayna is all too familiar with herself. The sob quickly turns into heavy crying. Alicent's shoulders heave with each attempt of an inhale. Silent tears fall down Elayna's face. 

She can't hug Alicent properly because of the twins, but she tries her best. She stands as close to Alicent as she can and wraps her free arm around her. Alicent doesn't respond in kind but grips Elayna's arm. She almost seems as if she might collapse.

When Alicent does fall into Elayna, Elayna catches her as best she can. Elayna carefully guides her towards a chair. Once Alicent is close enough to lean on the chair, Elayna speaks. 

“Here. Give me Aelon.” 

Elayna shifts so she can take both infants. Alicent hands Aelon over. Elayna tries her best to carefully guide Alicent towards the seat of the chair, mostly to ensure Alicent doesn't fall. Alicent manages to get into the seat. Elayna kneels in front of her.

They stay like that for a moment. 

Eventually, Alicent clears her throat. She looks at Elayna from underneath her eyelashes. Elayna nods.

“Would you like to hold Reynard now?”

“I would.”

Elayna hands Reynard over, cooing as she does so. Reynard kicks his feet but does nothing more in the way of protest. Alicent carefully cradles him in her arms. Elayna watches for a minute before Aelon, clearly upset with the lack of attention, lets out a high pitch scream. When Elayna looks down at him, he grins and giggles.

Elayna's summons aren't unexpected. 

“The King wishes to speak with you.”

Elayna slowly stands. She turns to face Alicent, but she doesn't need to ask. Alicent offers before she can ask.

“I'll watch them.”

Elayna offers her a small smile. She trusts Alicent. The loss of two of her grandchildren and two of her children means she understands Elayna's pain, Elayna's fears. Alicent won't harm her children.

Elayna follows the Kingsguard. She expects to be taken to the Throne Room. Instead, the path leads towards the King's chambers. Aegon holding an audience in there feels strange in her mind. Perhaps he has yet to fully recover from his injuries. Elayna never saw him, at least, not the full extent. She had been willing to look at him if he wished, but she opted to give him privacy instead. 

It wasn't out of disgust she did not look but respect. When she went to see him, his wounds were still fresh. The thought of another person seeing her as she might have seen him, weak and hurt beyond belief, meant she averted her eyes. 

They stop in front of the doors. Elayna takes a moment to inhale and steady herself before the doors open.

Aegon sits in a chair in the antechamber of his rooms. Elayna notes the blanket covering his legs but opts not to say anything. 

“Your Highness.” Elayna curtsies deeply. She looks up as she straightens back up. Aegon nods.

“Lady Elayna.” 

The two stare at each other from across the room.

“I was glad to hear of your survival.” Elayna starts. She does mean her words. While the news of him being alive was entwined with the news of Rhaenyra's death, she finds herself more comforted by the fact Aegon survived. “I... I did worry.”

“Lord Strong planned well.” Aegon dips his head. “Almost as well as Ser Tyland. Getting all the gold and you away, that is a lot to keep track of.”

“And I'm thankful he was able to do so.”

Aegon scrutinizes her. He narrows his eyes and stares at her in an almost calculating way. Elayna shifts. It's not an expression Elayna has seen on him before, and it almost makes her nervous. Aegon seems to see what he wants because he leans back slowly. A playful smile makes its way onto his face. 

“Did the two of you fuck?”

Elayna barely manages to keep herself from withdrawing in shock. Instead, her nostrils flare with indignation. Aegon tries to raise his eyebrows. The motion causes him pain; it makes his jaw clench and eyes screw shut.

Instinctively, she steps forward, wanting to offer help and ease the pain in any way she can. Elayna almost reaches out to grab his hand but catches herself.

"Well?" Aegon still sounds in pain. His question covers his slip-up. "Did you or did you not fuck?"

“No. We didn't.” Her words come out a hiss. Aegon nods. He doesn't seem entirely convinced.

“Do you want to?”

“That is not an appro-”

“ 'Tis a yes or no question.” Aegon looks at her. 

“I...” 

If Aegon were not so injured, he would raise his eyebrows and jut out his chin. He stares at her. Elayna screws her eyes shut.

“Answer me.”

She takes a deep breath. 

“Yes.”

She tries to force herself to sound authoritative. If she owns it, it shan't feel so shameful. It shan't feel like a betrayal. It would be an answer to a question. 

Instead, Elayna's voice comes out a soft whisper. It cracks almost. The single word rips and tears at something deep within her. Her husband has not even been dead a year, and yet, she openly admits to wanting another man. Shame swirls and screams in her brain. 

She opens her eyes and looks back at Aegon. Aegon studies her, not quite detached but not necessarily in a familiar way. Her internal agony must show on her face because he speaks after a long moment.

“I don't ask to cause pain.” Aegon begins slowly. She can almost feel him roll his words around in an attempt to select the right phrasing. Eventually, he sighs. “The Small Council wants you to marry already.”

“They wish to get rid of me.” The words fall from her lips without thought. “They wish to get rid of the wife of a kinslayer.”

Aegon stays silent. He looks away for a moment. His throat bobs. Elayna needs no more confirmation.

“I know you love Aemond.”

The use of the present tense nearly brings Elayna to tears. Aegon doesn't seem to notice his slip up. Perhaps it wasn't a mistake. Perhaps the wording was intentional. Aemond may have di- 

Is dead. Aemond is dead, but that doesn't mean Elayna's love for him died as well. Even if she herself feels as if part of her own soul passed the minute she was given the news, the love still lives on.

“I do.” She swallows. She blinks rapidly. The tears threaten to fall despite her efforts. Elayna turns her gaze to the ceiling and clears her throat. “His loss cannot be easy for you either. He is your brother.”

Aegon nods. 

“He would want you safe.” 

An idle question crosses her mind. She appreciates the warning about the Small Council's intentions, but to bring them up now seems strange. Tyland should be irrelevant to this conversation. Why does he feel like a focal point?

“What does this have to do with Tyland?” Aegon blinks with surprise at Elayna’s question. “You start by asking if I wish to sleep with him, and then speak of the Small Council and Aemond's wishes.”

“Nothing gets past you, dear sister.” Aegon nearly chuckles. The sound comes out weak. Elayna frowns. A small conversation such as this shouldn't be taking such a toll on him; it makes a small part of her ache to see him in such pain. “People need assurances. Especially the Westerlands.”

Elayna tilts her head. She regards him quietly. Each breath of his seems so labored. If she figures out what he's getting at, she can save him some agony.

“Aemond's children should grow up in their home.” Aegon rasps. Elayna studies Aegon.

“Are you... are you suggesting to marry me off to Tyland?” Elayna raises an eyebrow.

“You should have a husband you want to fuck.” 

Elayna purses her lips and turns her head away, not because she finds herself disgusted with his comment but because she may laugh at it. 

“I should.” Elayna decides on saying. Were she two years younger, she might have remarked on the fact most women don't get that choice. Instead, she holds her tongue. She turns back to face Aegon. “I accept.”

“Excellent.” Aegon raps the arm of his chair. He doesn't say what they're both thinking; Elayna's acceptance is just an illusion. The choice was already made. “You're dismissed.”

Despite the sun being above the horizon, the air grows cold as the chill of night begins to roll in. Elayna pulls her light cloak tighter around her shoulders. She's glad she thought to bring it on her walk in the gardens with Tyland. 

It had become a daily ritual at Casterly Rock for the two of them to walk in the evenings. Despite what the maesters said, Elayna had refused to stay bedbound during the last months of her pregnancy. Tyland offered to walk with her after supper so she might get the movement she wanted while still supervised in case something were to go wrong. The ritual quickly became the favorite part of Elayna’s day.

“Aegon seems to have grown. He thinks more as a King should.” 

Tyland nods his agreement. He keeps his stride even with Elayna's as they walk.

“I noticed much the same at the Council meeting. He's already looking forward to what the next year should bring.”

Elayna arches an eyebrow. “Had you told me two years ago that could even be possible, I would have called you a liar.”

“I'm sure it would not have been the worst thing you would have said of me two years ago.”

“No.” Elayna shakes her head almost violently. “Not you. Never you.”

Tyland raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything in regards to that. Instead, he turns back to look in front of them. 

“The King thinks we may need to bring a more favorable image back to the Crown. He seems to have an idea in mind already since he was asking about our reserves.”

“Well, an easy way to do that would be a royal wedding, but he has to be careful. I wouldn't trust just any bride.” Elayna purses her lips. “He could use that to his advantage. While he cannot mourn Queen Helaena all his life, a certain level must be expected. so long as the wedding occurs within a year, I don't think people will be too upset.”

Tyland tilts his head slightly before nodding in silent agreement. 

“That is a way to bring people together, yes.” 

The two walk in silence for a moment. As they do so, Elayna studies him. He looks almost lost in thought. His eyebrow almost press together while his mouth stays in a thin line. No one else is present in this portion of the gardens. Elayna nudges Tyland gently with her shoulder. 

“Anything you wish to share?”

“Aegon brought up an interesting proposal to me.” Tyland turns to face Elayna. “He told me it may be suggested I take a wife.”

“Oh? And did he have anyone in mind?”

“Yes. You.” Tyland looks Elayna in the eye. “He suggested it as if the Council thought of it themselves.”

“And you think he came up with it himself?”

“I do.” 

Elayna nods. “I think so too.” At Tyland’s confused expression, Elayna laughs softly. “He spoke with me about it earlier today.”

“And? What did you think?”

Elayna feigns an indifferent shrug.

“ ‘Tis a sound plan.” Elayna watches Tyland, gauging his reaction. She wants, no, needs to know if he wants to marry her. She could live with it, she supposes, if he doesn't want to. The cold and sudden feeling of dread at the thought of him saying no tries to tell her otherwise, but she does her best to ignore it.

“That's not an answer.”

“Tell me what you think first. Then I shall give my opinion.” Elayna bites the inside of her cheek to keep from giggling at Tyland’s expression.

“You're acting childish.”

“Oh? How exactly am I being childish?”

“ ‘Tis a yes or no answer.”

“And I shall answer once you give me yours.”

Tyland sighs.

“I agree with the decision.” He phrases his answer carefully. Elayna hums.

“Luckily for us all, I also agree with it.”

Sleep evades Elayna that night. 

She tosses and turns, doing her best to let slumber overtake her. It never comes. Eventually, after the Seven knows how many hours, she gets out of bed. She might as well take advantage of her wakefulness and do something useful.

The knock on her door almost doesn't surprise her.

“Come in.”

The guard from earlier comes inside.

“The King wishes to speak with you.”

Elayna raises an eyebrow. The temptation to remark upon the hour is strong, but she keeps it to herself. If Aegon summoned her at such an hour, it was no doubt important. She wants to ask if she has time to change into a more acceptable robe at the very least. Instead, she reaches down and tightens her robe more. 

“Very well.”

The halls are almost eerily silent. Elayna remembers even at night, she could hear people, albeit speaking more softly than usual. People fleeing the Keep no doubt contributes to it; most still seem to think it unsafe still. It unsettles Elayna. Nothing is as it was when she left, and it breaks her heart once more to think of all the little things lost. Nothing compares to the pain of losing loved ones, yet the lose of familiar sights and sound, of laughter and whispered gossip, hurts as well.

When she and the guards round one of the corners, she's surprised to see another set of guards. Tyland follows behind them. Elayna raises an eyebrow. Why would Aegon summon both of them? And at this hour nonetheless? 

They follow wordlessly behind the guards. Elayna has no idea what to say. Eventually, Tyland leans towards her. 

“Did they tell you what we're being called for?”

“No.” Elayna shakes her head. 

Once they arrive at the doors to Aegon's chambers, the door swing open. Both of them enter, Elayna stepping in before Tyland. At first, Elayna doesn't see Aegon. Her eyes dart around the room, trying to find him. She notices a large mound of cushions stacked in the corner. Eventually, she notices a gauzy curtain drawn across part of the room. 

The doors shut behind both her and Tyland. Elayna turns to her head to look at Tyland. Tyland raises an eyebrow. 

Aegon's voice comes from behind the curtain. In unison, the two of them turns towards the source. 

“Are the two of you in agreement about the plan?”

Elayna looks to Tyland. She reaches her hand out to touch his. Her heart leaps into her throat when he takes her hand in his and intertwines their fingers. 

“Yes.” Tyland speaks for both of them. 

“Good. Then I shall proceed to the matter at hand. I want the two of you to fuck. And I want to watch.” Neither Tyland or Elayna move. Even though she can’t see him too well behind the curtain, Elayna knows Aegon makes a face and juts his chin out some. “Fornicate? Have sex? I know my dear sister knows how, but do you, Ser Tyland?”

Tyland genuinely looks offended. He pulls his head back and purses his lips. He doesn't manage to catch himself from twitching his upper lip with irritation and disgust. Elayna’s heart skips a beat for a second. His expression is endearing, not because it was a particularly attractive expression but because it makes sense for him. 

“I do!”

“Excellent!” Aegon claps. “Then the issue is resolved.”

Heat rushes to Elayna’s face, embarrassment turning her pink. Tyland blinks. 

“Your Grace, I'm not sure th-”

“Elayna has suffered enough misery. I won't stand by and let her suffer a husband who can't fuck her properly.” Aegon tilts his head. “Unless you can't get it up?”

“Aegon!” Elayna hisses. 

“I do this for your sake.” Aegon tilts his head. “Would you rather take a chance on him not being able to please you?” He eyes the both of them. “If you are truly uncomfortable, you are free to go.”

Elayna meets Tyland’s eyes. Tyland stares at Elayna. He brings his hand up to her face. When he gently cups her face, Elayna's knees buckle at the tenderness of his touch. Behind the comfort and concern, Elayna sees a hunger mirroring her own. Tyland’s tongue darts out to wet his lips.

“We don't have to do this.” He whispers. “We can ask for oth-”

His genuine concern breaks her. Elayna closes the small distance between each other. She presses her lips against his. Tyland doesn't react for a minute. Panic begins to rise in Elayna for a second.

He kisses her back. The fear and anxiety evaporate.

Tyland kisses her as if he has wanted to do nothing more in his life. Elayna wonders if that's true. One hand finds the nape of her neck, fingers curling into her hair. Elayna responds in kind. Her touch isn't as gentle as his. She sinks her fingers into his hair. She traps the surprisingly soft and lustrous strands between her fingers. 

If she's going to do this, she might as well do this as if it's the only chance she gets. 

Experimentally, she tugs at his hair, not hard enough to truly hurt him but enough to see if he likes it. Elayna is no stranger to pain and rough treatment. Giving and receiving are as familiar as old friends. Either sets her body alight. 

An idle thought crosses her mind. Tyland’s gentleness and consideration for her is the only instance where her body thrums as much as it did when Aemond manhandled her. It almost makes her want to provoke him. If she feels this way from him being caring, him being rough with her would turn her into a whimpering mess within seconds. 

Elayna trusts him to build her back up once he breaks her. Hopefully he puts the same faith in her. 

When she pulls again, Tyland lets out an unmistakable noise of pleasure. He squeezes her hip. Elayna grins into the kiss, following it with a nip to his lower lip. Tyland squeezes hard. He slips his free hand around to her back. She rewards him by scratching his scalp gently with her nails.

Elayna pulls away first. Tyland gazes at her with an almost dazed look. She likes it on him, how his lips are kiss bruised and how his eyes are dark yet gentle. He brings his hand from her back to her chin. He strokes his thumb over the curve of her cheek.

“Can I?” Tyland brings his other hand to the tie of her robe. From the look on his face, Elayna thinks the question isn't just about her robe. Elayna nods.

“Yes. Please.”

Tyland inhales. He undoes her dressing gown with deft fingers. The fabric slides off Elayna’s shoulders and hits the floor with a very soft, almost airy, noise. Her nightgown is a red silk, not as delicate or dainty as her robe. Elayna moves forward to kiss him again. One of his hands finds her hair while his other skates gently down her arm, his fingertips leaving goosebumps in their wake.

This kiss is a little more desperate, a little more teeth and tongue. Her skin buzzes at every point of contact with him. She pushes against him, desperate for more. Her fingers dig into the fabric of his tunic.

“Take this off.” She pulls at the fabric. He nods. Elayna moves to give him space. 

Tyland tosses his shirt off as Elayna turns behind them to the pillows she noticed stacked up in the corner. She grabs one of them and sets it on the ground in front of Tyland. Before she can lower herself down, Tyland leans down to kiss her. She almost giggles into the kiss.

“You don't have to.”

“I know. I want to.”

Elayna sinks to her knees. The plush pillow underneath her feels good. Her hands come up to begin to help him with his belt. 

She pushes back onto her knees. Elayna moves with her intuition. She opens her mouth, sticking her tongue out expectantly. She hears two sharp inhales. Only one of them matters to her.

“Fuck. You have a gorgeous cock.”

Before she can be embarrassed, Tyland groans at her words. Elayna smirks up at him. She looks up at him from under her eyelashes. 

“Like it when I compliment you? Do you like hearing how handsome you are? How gorgeous this cock is?”

Oh, fuck. Elayna actually watches his dick twitch. It almost slaps against his stomach. The sight makes Elayna squirm, spreading her knees ever so slightly. Tyland brings one of his hands down to cup her cheek. 

“Do you think I can take it all?” Elayna purrs. She revels in this new found confidence. She pushes her braids back. However, when she goes to lean forward, Tyland stops her by pressing his thumb to her lips.

“Let me... let me help.”

Elayna tilts her head but nods. Tyland presses his thumb against her lips more insistently. She parts them, wanting to see where he's going with this. 

Her gasp of surprise doesn't make it past her lips. Tyland slips two fingers inside of her mouth. He looks down at her, concern clear on his eyes. Elayna opens her jaw wider to accommodate for the stretch. She inhales through her nose and smells metal, no doubt from Tyland’s rings. Tyland presses down experimentally on her tongue. Elayna lets out a small noise at the feeling.

Elayna about chokes when he presses the pad of his fingers on the back of her tongue. Her eyes water. She tilts her head up more to try and let his fingers slide further down. Tyland places his palm on her cheek.

“Good girl.” He murmurs. Fondness covers every word. “Can you take a little more?”

She tries to reply. A bit of drool slips down her chin. Elayna nods. Tyland pushes his fingers a little further back. This time, Elayna gags. Tyland shushes her. 

“ ‘Tis okay.” He assures her. He pulls back his fingers for a second before pressing them forward again. Elayna accepts them eagerly. She flicks her tongue upward and along his fingers. She looks up at him from underneath her eyelashes. She wants more, needs more. 

Her eyes nearly roll back in her head when he moves his fingers. Tyland starts slowly, giving her ample time to get used to the sensation of his fingers sliding back and forth along her tongue and towards her throat. Elayna moans. He thrusts his fingers at a slightly faster pace. She tries her best to take him further. The idea of her lips touching his rings makes her squirm.

“Breathe.” 

Seven above. The simple command makes her head spin. She inhales through her nose as best she can. Tyland brings his other hand to her cheek. He strokes his thumb along her cheekbone. The gentle touch sits at odds with the way he's outright finger fucking her mouth now. Elayna spreads her legs. Her hand sneaks down between her thighs without her permission. 

Tyland pulls his fingers from her mouth. Elayna gasps for air. Spit connects her lips to his fingers. She looks up at him. Instinctively, she opens her mouth wider and presents her tongue for him. Instead of spitting into her mouth, he leans down and places a gentle kiss on her forehead.

She gasps at the contact. Elayna meets his gaze. 

“You're doing good for me.” He praises. Elayna nods desperately. She wants him but needs to be good for him.

“Stick your cock in her mouth already.”

Tyland’s jaw twitches at the rudeness in the command. Nevertheless, he moves forward. Before he can even take his cock into his hands, Elayna pounces. She surges forward and licks the vein on the underside. Tyland chokes. Her free hand finds his base to keep him where she wants. As she traces her tongue along his length, she closes her eyes. She feels the tension in his body. Wordlessly, she reaches forward and takes one of his hands. 

When Elayna pulls back, she opens her eyes. 

“I don't mind.” Elayna carefully places Tyland’s hand at the back of her head. Tyland looks down at her. She gazes up at him from underneath her eyelashes. She tries to hide her grin. Tyland presses his thumb to her bottom lip. She opens her mouth in response.

Tyland takes himself in hand. Elayna flattens her tongue as much as she can. Carefully, Tyland pushes the tip into her mouth. Elayna works to curl her tongue around him. She watches as Tyland lets out a low hiss of pleasure. 

She wants to hear more. She needs to hear more.

Tyland outright moans when Elayna pushes her head forward to take more of him in her mouth. She suction her cheeks as best she can. Her eagerness takes him by surprise. His fingers curl into her hair as she begins to move. Elayna brings her free hand up to work what doesn't fit in her mouth. Despite his length, she fits more into her mouth than she anticipates. After several minutes, she touches her lips to her hand. 

The sounds in the room are positively obscene. All Elayna hears is the slick noises with every shallow thrust into her mouth, two sets of ragged breathing, and her own breath and heartbeat. Tyland begins to shallowly thrust into her mouth, still clearly trying to not hurt her. Elayna rewards him; she lets out a satisfied hum next thrust.

The moan he lets out goes straight to her head. She almost feels her eyes roll back into her head at the sound. Fuck. Listening to him makes her head spin in the best way. Elayna pushes her legs even further apart and rests her free hand on her upper thigh. Tyland tightens his grip on her hair. His chest heaves. His thighs tremble to keep himself in check. 

She doesn't want that, she wants to see him lose control. She wants to see him lose control because of her.

Elayna looks up at him again. Tyland stares down at her. The look in his eyes almost makes Elayna whimper. He gazes down at her with an expression equal parts love and lust. A air of adoration lingers in his face, and the way he pushes her hair back gently just proves it. It fuels something deep within her. She pulls back to give herself a moment to breath. 

When she goes back, Elayna takes him all the way to the base. She keeps her eyes locked on his. Tyland’s eyes go wide. His chest heaves, and he almost seems to struggle to breath for a second. Elayna doesn't stop until she feels her nose touch his skin.

“Fuck.” Tyland’s voice comes out as praise and want. In the single word alone, Elayna hears how much power she has over him. A giggle tries to escape her. Tyland throws his head back with a moan, fingers digging into her hair. “Don't...”

If she could, Elayna would smirk. She tries to relax her throat more around him. Tyland groans. His fingers tighten in her hair, and he pulls her back. Elayna looks up at him. The whine that escapes her even takes her by surprise. 

Tyland kneels down to in front of her. He kisses her deeply once more. Elayna's eyes flutter closed at the sensation. His hands settle on her thighs. The sensation is muted against her because of her clothes. Elayna pulls away from him. 

“Let me-”

“I've got it.”

Elayna pushes up enough off her knees and calves to pull the hem of her nightgown out from under her. Tyland's hands meet hers when the fabric comes up over her knees. She places her knees back down and presses more into a seated position. They work together to pull her dress up over her head and off her body. 

“Beautiful.” 

Elayna's skin heats up, from her chest to her ears at the compliment. He says it as if he wasn't even aware, as if the words just fell out of his mouth. Elayna's eyes find his. Tyland’s eyes are dark with desire.

“Lean back.”

Elayna leans back on the thick pillows, black with silver and red embroidery. Her chest heaves. Tyland grabs three pillows, two for him to presumably lay down upon. Having Tyland so close to her naked body makes her shiver. He has yet to look at her most intimate parts. The thought terrifies her. What if he is repulsed by her? Or doesn't want to?

Tyland’s hand on her hip brings her back to the present. She makes a small noise and turns her gaze to him.

“Up.” He taps her hip twice. Elayna presses upward; Tyland slides the pillow underneath her. The angle eases some pressure from her lower back. He pushes back, hands warm on her thighs. He pauses for a second to look up at her, expression soft. Elayna's heart pounds in her chest at the wordlessly check-in, and she nods. 

“Yes. You can.”

She squeals when he grabs her thighs and pulls her to the edge of the pillow. The urge to pull away and hide herself almost overtakes her. She starts to pull away but before she can get far, Tyland takes careful hold of her calf. His beard brushes against the inside of her leg, just below her ankle.

Elayna gasps softly. He presses a gentle kiss to her skin. Her chest heaves. She stares at him with wide eyes. Tyland adjusts his hold on her and moves his lips lower. She lets her head fall back as he inches his lips down the inside of her leg. Her heart rate noticeable increases. She outright moans at the first contact of his beard and lips on her thigh. Her other leg falls out to the side.

When he reaches the top of her inner thigh, Tyland stares at her for a long moment. Elayna watches him. Her chest heaves, blood singing in her veins. Tyland wets his lips.

Her entire body erupts into flames. Heat surges through her. He hasn't even put his mouth to her, yet a keeping whine escapes her lips.

As soon as his tongue makes contact, Elayna's hands shoot out and find their way into his hair. Tyland starts with a slow, broad stroke. At the top, he stiffens his tongue to flick her clit. 

“Fuck.” The curse leaves her as a sigh. Her hips follow the movement of his mouth. She tries to push up onto her forearms, but it isn't long before the pleasure racing through her means she can't keep herself propped up. 

Tyland surprises her. He makes out with her pussy, not just eats her out. Every movement of his tongue is slow and methodical yet passionate. His mouth moves against her as if he was taking his time to kiss her. Elayna arches into it. When his tongue presses just to the left of Elayna’s clit instead of dead center, she moans.

Tyland notices. Of course he notices. 

He turns his head slightly. The new position gives him better access to the spot. He puts a little more pressure there, not enough to hurt but enough to make every part of her body sing. Elayna's moans get louder. She grips his hair as she throws her head back. Pleasure surges through her with such intensity she almost tries to pull back. Her legs tremble around his head. Tyland doesn't let her escape, instead pining her down with one of his palms flat on her stomach.

“I-” Elayna tries to find herself, but the steady movement of his tongue against her makes all rational thought impossible. She nearly ruts against his face. All she thinks about is the feeling of his mouth against her. 

She arches almost entirely off the pillows when he slips his tongue inside of her. Tyland curls his tongue up until he presses against something inside of her that makes her wail. Her whole body trembles. He moves his head, and the dam inside her breaks. 

Tyland slowly makes his way up her body, his lips ghosting over her skin. The care with which he treats her makes her float as much as what he does. Tyland stops and hovers above her.

“You can.” She murmurs.

The stretch as he pushes inside her cause a moment of discomfort. It's the first time someone has been inside her since she's given birth. She breathes through it until he bottoms out. 

Oh, she's missed this, this feeling of fullness, of slotting together perfectly. Elayna stares up at him. Eyes wide as she does so, she brings her right hand to his face. Tyland groans. He takes the silent invitation. His thrust start slow and unhurried. She rocks her hips into his. It feels good, pleasure coursing through her veins. 

Still. She wants more. She needs more. 

Elayna wraps her legs tight around his waist. She tries to encourage him to go faster by digging her heels into his low back. Tyland hisses.

“Elayna...”

“I'm not going to break.” 

The encouragement makes his hips stutter. Elayna squeals when he shifts back onto his knees, bringing her hips with him. Her head stays down and back arches. The angle causes her eyes to roll back into her head. 

“Fuck.”

Despite the change in angle, he keeps his movements slow and unhurried. The drag of his cock inside her, along her walls, sends a pleasant rush through her. Having her head down with her lower body lifted helps. Elayna whimpers. 

“Harder.” The word spills from her lips unbidden, both a demand and a gasp at the same time. Tyland gives into her. It's still not enough. 

Elayna doesn't want tenderness. Her whole body and soul aches for it, but she doesn't want it. She wants rough and hard; she wants to forget everything. Elayna craves the idea of being broken down into nothing.

“Fuck me like you hate me.” Elayna gasps out. “Like you should.”

She doesn't know how she means it. He should hate her, loathe her. What has she done but asked of him, taken and taken without ever giving? He should fuck her as he sees fit. Elayna wants that, to finally give.

Tyland stops. Elayna actually whines her displeasure. She stares at Tyland, fighting to keep both her confusion and hurt off her face. He's still hard inside her. She clenches around him in an effort to make him move, but he doesn't. Tyland lets out a low hiss but his hips stay still.

“Why'd you stop?”

Tyland looks down at her. His normal put together and slicked back hair falls in his face. His eyes trail over her face. 

“No.” He murmurs. Elayna feels her bottom lip tremble. Tyland quickly shushes her, pressing his lips to her forehead. He swallows. “I... I've wanted this. Far longer than you realize.” 

“I feel the same.” Her heart pounds hard against her ribs at the admission. This time, when Elayna bucks her hips, he matches her movement. 

“Elayna. This is, mmhmmm, this is serious.” Tyland drops down onto one forearm. He presses the other between them and across her hips in an attempt to keep her still. “I... fuuuck, I want. To do this. I want to do this how I've been dreaming about.”

Fuck. She clenches hard around him. Tyland hisses. Elayna swallows hard. A longing, the ever present longing, rears its head. Hesitantly, she nods. 

“I trust you.”

Each stroke stays slow yet intense. Tyland keeps his movements unhurried, as if he's trying to savor every moment. He keeps his gaze on her, watching and drinking in every expression on her face. Elayna finds herself watching him back. Even as she digs her nails into his back, her eyes stay on his. 

Every noise falling out of Elayna’s mouth comes out soft yet sweet, a symphony she wasn't even aware she could make. She knows how loud she can be or how high pitch she can get. The noises coming from her almost feel brand new, different. They feel natural. Each breathy moan fits perfectly into the moment. 

Elayna presses her palms flat on Tyland’s shoulder blades. The urge to dig her nails into his skin never appears. Instead, she clings to him. Her legs lock around his hips, ankles crossing over the other. He shifts slightly, and the angle makes Elayna tilt her head back with a soft sob. 

He presses his forehead to hers. Elayna tries her best to keep eye contact with him, but between the building pleasure and tears, she struggles. An almost whine escapes her. Tyland adjusts, lifting his forehead to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“I've got you.” He moves one hand and takes hold of hers. Tyland interlaces their fingers. Elayna gasps. The simple gesture makes her head spin in a delicious way. She finds an odd eroticism in it. Even now, his tenderness takes her breath away.

This time, Elayna doesn't fight it. She lets herself accept it. The thought she doesn't deserve such treatment never surfaces. She squeezes his hand back. 

Tyland shushes her gently. Elayna realizes a second later she's crying. Tears stream down her face, not big fat ones she associates with sadness. 

He kisses her. 

Tyland kisses her, and her whole world collapses. Elayna nearly sobs as she crests, body trembling in pleasure. The edges comes slowly and gently at first. However, as it begins to wash over her, she feels it build. The pleasure goes from nice to intense as it continues. Elayna clings to him. She holds onto him as if he's her lifeline. When she squeezes his hand, Tyland rubs his thumb over the back of her hand. 

He loves her.

The realization washes over her as her orgasm did, a steady and pleasant feeling that builds in intensity. Tyland loves her. He doesn't have to say it; she sees it now. The look on his face as he stares at her, lust and awe written on his face in equal parts, tells her as much. 

He loves her.

Fuck. She loves him too.

The words almost fall from the tip of her tongue. She keeps them at bay. Instead, she buries her face into his shoulder, letting out a pathetic whine. She pulls him as close as she can, heels locked around his back and palms on his shoulder blades to pull him even closer. Tyland moves his hips in shorter movements. Elayna pants against his skin. Her mouth won't form words; she settles for kissing his neck. 

That undoes him. He gives three more shallow thrusts before he stills. He collapses, trying his best to keep himself from pining her completely underneath him. After a moment, Elayna feels a small amount of cum begin to leak out of her. 

Unbidden, the thought of her being pregnant again rises to the forefront of her mind. Elayna sees it so clearly in his mind, the way Tyland would hold her and dote on her. She'd want for nothing. She clenches around him, causing him to hiss. 

A rustling catches her attention. Behind the curtain, Elayna spots movement. Aegon pulls away and pushes back. An undeniable air of shame comes from him. Tyland senses it too; he presses himself back onto his forearms.

“Go.” Aegon croaks from his unseen position. Elayna says nothing, just lets Tyland pull her up once he gets to his feet.

Her body sits heavy, exhausted yet satiated. Every bit of her feels boneless. A relief sits within her she hasn't felt in a while. Between her crying fit and finally feeling the touch of someone after months, every bit of resistance and ache in her body disappears for the moment. Everything from her legs to her jaw loosens, almost to the point of making her wobble. 

Elayna almost feels fuzzy at the edges. Not in a bad way. If anything, she needs it. For too long, her walls have been up. She’s held onto her need to be a bastion, both for those around her and the idea of being seen as weak and wanting tears her apart. This need has only been detrimental to her; Tyland was right when he told her she couldn’t keep on as she has. 

The walk back to her chambers takes a minute. Elayna makes a mental note of the look on Tyland’s face when he watches her; she can’t give him any hell right now, but she can at a later point. 

Once back in her chambers, Elayna makes her way over to her vanity. She doesn’t need to look into the mirror to know her hair is a mess, multiple thick strands out of her braids. Carefully, she sits down at the vanity. Elayna undoes her braids. A quiet satisfaction builds within her body as she begins to brush out her hair. 

It’s been so long since she’s done this. Elayna knows she can explain away her hair by citing bedhead, but she likes doing this. She always did it as a post-sex ritual when married to Aemond. She moves almost on autopilot. 

She inhales slowly and then exhales slowly. She lifts her head to look at herself in the mirror. Elayna stares at her reflection. A smile plays about her lips. The woman looking back seems content, fulfilled. It's not a familiar sight but a sorely missed one. 

Eventually, she stands and stumbles over to her bed. The sheets lay rumpled from earlier, but it's easy enough to make herself comfortable.

She falls asleep almost instantly when her head hits the pillow. Her sleep is dreamless.

Only when she wakes up does the reality of yesterday hit her. 

She stretches slowly, the pleasant ache in her body reminding her of what happened. Based on the low light filtering through the curtains, she thinks it must be early morning. Her back cracks. Elayna smiles. She rolls over onto her side, preparing her speech as to why they should stay in bed the rest of the day instead of attending to important matters.

The other side of the bed sits empty and cold.

Tyland isn't there. Elayna frowns softly and reaches out into the empty space. She blinks. Despite no one being around to see her blunder, she feels silly, foolish. Of course he wouldn't be there.

Aemond should be the one there.

Aemond isn't either. 

Aemond is never going to be there ever again.

Instantly, Elayna shrinks and curls in on herself, all good mood gone with a single thought. Even after all these months, she misses waking up beside him. It's been worse since the birth of the twins. The amount of times she's woken up, hoping against all odds it was a dream and Aelon and Reynard will be snuggled between the two of them is uncountable. Elayna sighs. She buries her head in her pillow.

Aemond isn't here. He'll never be here again. Elayna blinks back tears. An ugly voice rises amongst the wave of sadness hitting her. She thought first of Tyland when she awoke. She didn't think of Aemond, her deceased husband, but thought instead of another man. Not just another man but a Lannister.

She bites down hard on the edge of the pillow she curled around in a desperate bid to hide her face. Still, she doesn’t manage to muffle all of the wail wanting to break free from her. An almost detached part of her likens it to a wounded animal. Elayna wishes the thought hadn’t occurred to her; it feels as if she ripped apart a wound on her own and poured salt inside of it.

As she lays there, another thought begins circling her brain. This one is worse than the others. This one makes her want to puke, bile threatening to rise. It’s a summation of everything, she supposes, of every blunder and mistakes.

What has she done. 

[neometalsilver]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56808592/chapters/144429325

i wrote a fic for the @sthbigbang !! it was my first multi-chapter AND my first time writing something other than h/c so i got to push myself waaayyyy out of my comfort zone which was super super fun and rewarding. honestly i actually feel as though i learnt a lot about writing while doing this, i've never done an event like this before so everything was very new. thank you to fenn, ellie, summer, joy, frosti, and chaz for hosting and modding the event! yall did a wonderful job <33

i got paired with three artists: @0vergrowngraveyard, @aqspec, and @soupsnspoons! they all did SUCCH a wonderful job and their pieces are so incredibly fantastic. i will link their art as it is posted but pls do check out their other works as well!!! thank you as well to @axtrip27 for being my beta reader. the patience it must have took to not go crazy when i threw scene after scene at you 24/7...... your edits and suggestions were absolutely vital to this fics completion.

aqspec’s art

overgrown’s art

soup’s art

summary below:

A character and relationship study explored in 5 snapshots. - Tails is, in many ways, a surprising child. As a small child living out in the woods, it’s easy to underestimate exactly what he is capable of- a mistake even the most well meaning of people make upon first meeting him. Whether they underestimate his intelligence, his insightfulness, or even how far he will go to protect the people he loves, there is always something new to learn about the kit. As he grows, each person he meets will make a discovery about him that changes how they view him, for better or worse.

[sandy-the-glader]

maybe a george x grumpy! reader who never really smiles or shows emotion and George kinds makes it his secret mission to do that

Come on I see that smile!

Character: George Karim x Fem!Reader

Type: fluff

Length: 1.7K Words

Summary: Ever since you got to Portland row all it has been is neutral faces, anger and frowns. But George seems to be curious about what your smile looks like… for research purposes of course!

Trope: Grumpy x Sunshine (sorta)

A/n: Sorry if this is bad I've been trying to get back into writing btw maybe a tad bit of ooc George? Anyways this is a mix of second and first-person. Lmao lastly the format and like the 4 and 1 idea came from this fic so go check it out!

4 tries and 1 unintentional victory

Baked goods

Large raindrops pattered against the kitchen window of 35 Portland Row, creating a relaxing rhythm. I sprawled out articles and other various newspapers across the table. There wasn't much information on this house, no visitors had been reported before this caller. No murder cases from that house or interesting behaviors. I jotted down as many notes as I could on a surprisingly clean part of the thinking cloth.

A loud knock echoed through the house. I was too sucked into finding information and suspicious parts about this house to answer the door. Thankfully, I heard someone (most likely George) quickly dash to the door and handled with whatever it was. I assumed it was Arif since it was a quick interaction and the scent was so strong I could already smell it. Damn it smelled good.

George's quick footsteps dashed down to the kitchen, quickly landing the box on an available part of the table. I quickly drew my eyes back to the pages scanning for something remotely helpful. The worst case was going in cold.

"How's the case going?" George came to look at the papers and my progress. His fingers traced my handwriting.

"Not good. There is not a single thing tied to this house. And she said I have to be there in a week." I said with a dry expression. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw George rock back and forth on his heels before he spoke again.

"Well um, I got you extra of your favorite this week." I looked up at him. "If you need to take a break they are there." He offered.

"Thank you I appreciate that." George looked somewhat upset with my reaction. Why? I'm not exactly sure

"Yeah.." He grabbed a chocolate donut from the box and sighed on the way out of the room. I hope he’s okay.

Did I do something wrong?

"Is that a donut??" I heard Lucy call out from the stairs. "I didn't even know we had those!" maybe a break wouldn’t hurt…

2. Stress Cleaning

Sure this was more for George than it was for you but he hoped to kill 2 birds with one stone. He had spent the whole evening cleaning the house. Kitchen, library you name it. He left the bedrooms for last.

He knocked softly on your door and waited for a reply before going up the stairs. There wasn't much to clean in your's and Lucy's shared area besides maybe the windows and a few pieces of clothing needed to be picked up off the ground.

You were reading a book on your bed instead of trying to find more information on that house. You needed a break and your mind was just tired from searching article upon article. You had 3 more days and thought to hell with it I'll just do my best.

"What's up, George?" You peered over your book and at the boy. "Oh." From seeing his apron and blue gloves you already knew he meant cleaning. "You know you don't always have to clean up after us." He shook his head.

"You know cleaning is one of my favorite things right?" He cleaned every single day. Not even kidding. You can't remember the last time you've seen the house jaw-droppingly dirty. Because it never has been. For the many months you’ve been here George has done a fantastic job with keeping the house organized.

"That is true. I do feel bad sometimes." You hummed. "Well thank you." George quirked a small smile but you just nodded in acknowledgment.

Well, it was worth a try. He sighed quietly.

3. Favorite food

He knew as soon as you stepped through the door and slammed it shut, he had made a good decision. Another thing on George's list of "Y/n's smiles" was dinner. Sure food didn't work as well last time this was different.

He heard you curse at something and then throw your rapier into its spot by the door. You took in a deep breath through your nose trying to contain your anger from the trip and not make a lot of noise considering the time but you smelt something. Something so heavenly that's all you needed right now. Food.

You quickly went down the stairs and saw George in his apron Moving around the kitchen.

"Smells great Georgie. It's 3 am you didn't have to." She frowned feeling a bit bad for keeping him up.

"It's really no problem at all." He loved cooking so really it was just fun. "Looks like you had a fun night." She rolled her eyes and groaned. He leaned against a cabinet and glanced at you up and down. Your hair was very messy, traces of ectoplasm was all over your shoes and the bottom of your pants, and you were just really wanting food and a shower.

"Sarcasm. Not now I beg of you. But really the food smells fantastic." A sneaky smile formed on George's lips, not yours though you were far too tired to even think about it.

"Alright. Food's ready anyway." He brought two servings of the food over to the table placing one in front of you and the other across from you. "Do you want to talk about it?" He offered sitting down in front of his food.

"It was awful! The source was in a completely different part of the house than she thought and it was just disastrous!" You complained. He sat there and listened to your troubles like you always did with him.

You finally had a bite of the food and you felt at ease.

“George Casper Karim why can you cook so well?” He smiled downward. You didn’t smile you just had this tired yet calm look on your face.

“I have more talent than just touch.” He joked. She was right though the food did taste amazing.

“Yes you do.” George wasn’t entirely mad at the fact you didn’t smile but he did enjoy the compliment.

4. A New Sweater

George scanned the shelves of your favorite store looking for something you would like. There were plenty of things your style but what caught his eye was a sweater.

Your closet was full of them. Lucy too and so a sweater could be another candidate for his "Y/n's smiles" list.

It wasn’t too thick nor too light because he knew you were sorta picky when it comes to sweaters. And a bonus was it was one of your favorite colours.

He held it in his hands but, he double and even triple-checked the store for something you might like better. But he did not and he went and brought it up to the counter to pay.

The cashier was nice but she had mistaken George as your boyfriend which made him blush furiously and confirm the two of you were just close friends. The cashier didn’t buy it. She gave him a small disbelieving look and he tried to ignore it.

He was impressed by how well she wrapped up the sweater and put it in a really nice bag.

When he came back the house was insanely quiet, mainly because Lockwood was out of the house and Lucy was training in the basement. You had decided to have a lazy day you were mainly just in your bed or in front of your desk.

But he noticed you were making tea in the kitchen so he quietly ran upstairs to put your gift on your bed. And then he snuck back down to his room to wait for your return.

You held a cup in your hand and carefully walked upstairs. You were confused when finding a gift on your bed mainly because no one really gave you gifts out of the blue. A small gasp escaped your lips when you reached into the bag and pulled out a sweater. You held the sweater close. It was the right size it was quite a shocker

You didn't think Lucy even knew your size.

"Surprise." George came back up the stairs. You went and hugged him. He was slightly taken aback by the gesture. He wasn't exactly a hugger but he wrapped his arm around you and squeezed gently.

"Thank you, George. You do so much for me." Again he wasn't exactly angry that it had failed because he's never had a hug that felt this relaxing. He was feeling loved. "Anything." He said simply. You pulled back and ruffled his hair.

"You're too good for me."

George returned to his room and took a pen and struck off another idea on a sticky note above his desk. But he did put a small heart next to it.

5. Quality Time.

"Wanna go the archives with me? Lucy and Lockwood already said no but they were caught up in their own thing." George huffed. You sat up immediately and shoved a bookmark into your book. You cracked a half smile.

"I would love to." You sprung up and grabbed your bag and shoes. "They never want to go with me either." Still, a small smile plastered on your face.

George was shocked in the 3 months he knew you that's all it took? Just going to the archives? He would have groaned if he wasn't so happy for finally making you smile. The look was so unfamiliar on you but he definitely knew he wanted to see it more.

"I don't know why I never asked you." You chuckled softly. That was a complete lie. You didn't want to admit it or make it obvious that you have a raging crush on the other boy while being alone and so very close to him doing what you loved most.

George didn't even think about your comment. A chuckle? George's expectations were exceeded. He thought you would shrug it off and either go and keep to yourself or kindly decline.

"Come on Georgie!" You practically skipped out of the room, brushing past his shoulder and sending a jolt through his body. His heart swelled and he was honestly quite boastful at the moment. If he could shout it at the world he would. He felt like he deserved something for making Y/n L/n smile. But seeing your smile was an award in itself.

George followed her out of the house and down to explore the archives.

[dwreader]

Interview with the Vampire Episode 2 Podcast Transcript

Special Guests: Sam Reid and Jewelle Gomez

"Being a vampire is hard, its very difficult to endure and exist forever basically and you need to have quite a lot of strength and internal power to endure and Lestat recognizes that in Louis. When he sees him on the street and thinks that very very very beautiful man just pulled a knife on his brother in the middle of the street to look powerful to save his own skin and he has enough strength to do that and Lestat thinks this guy has enough strength to endure. And he's also got the hots for him really badly..." -Sam Reid

Sam Reid Interview

N: Sam Reid, thank you so much.

S: Thank you for having me.

N: Don't you be nice, I'm coming in here and I'm mad at you. My question is this- how dare you?

S: What are you referring to exactly?

N: Here's what I think of Lestat, I think Lestat is a messy bitch who lives for drama. What did you know about Lestat coming into the audition?

S: I know the books, I've known them for a very long time. I heard they were making it and I said I hoped I would get the chance to an audition for it. The thing that freaked me about the auditon was the majority of it was in French. It had all the lines in English but it said in paranthesis in French. I studied French in school and my sister speaks fluent French but I am not fluent so that was a bit stressful.

N: You and Jacob did your chemistry tests over Zoom, I mean does anyone have chemistry over Zoom? That must've been so tough.

S: Yeah,. I don't know what they were looking for or how to gauge chemistry from that cause it was really glitchy and speaking over each other and trying really hard to act into the camera which just wasn't really working. Jacob is such a lovely person and a fantastic actor and just an easy person to be around so I could tell he was gonna be a very easy person to fall in love with. It was fun, in fact I just came with having ice cream with Jacob. And he says hello

N: Omg I'm obsessed, give me this footage, I want ice cream footage, I want strolling the streets of downtown New Orleans footage.

S: And we hang out all the time, we've become very good friends. Cause it is a crazy journery we're on and its a crazy job so it's nice have a very good friend.

N: So Lestat has a life well before the show starts and he's been on this journey and you have the different versions of Lestat from the book and you have this amalgation. What sort of conversations did you have w/ the showrunner Rolin Jones about your version of Lestat?

S: The premise is for Louis to revisit the interview so Louis has a more nuanced way of describing Lestat so my question was how much of this is the real Lestat and how much of is Louis' version of Lestat? Because obviously this is a memory. This is all through Louis's eyes so is this actually how Lestat is like or is he different? and I think we play with that on and off. What's really important about this season is you're playing a character seen through somebody else's eyes.

N: Right right right, Gordian knot. It's a bit of a layer.

S: And everyone kept telling me stop thinking about it too much don't think about it and I didn't and I don't think about it too much when I'm doing. There will come a day when I think Lestat turns around and goes actually this is how it fucking happend.

N: Okay well Sam, you're just making me so mad cause you're too kind and too funny. cause I was coming in with hard hitting questions and I was livid at Lestat. This is what's so fun about the show and what its doing so right as a genre story, is the humor and the personality. [coffin scene plays] I mean Lestat is out here, it's such a funny monent for Lestat its like OK you wanna own a club? I was like Louis you have unlimited power and you want a club? Dream bigger!

S: I think it goes to show how in love Lestat is with Louis that he's gonna give him these things that mean absolutely nothing in the context of vampire world. But what Lestat doesn't understand is that what Louis needs is that power and is control over his life. There's a lesson for both of them and in this moment, Lestat doesn't understand.

N: Here's another question I have.. I just need you to tell me, where is Lestat's money coming from??

S: He's got investments and he's got bankers and lawyers in France. When he got turned into a vampire, he was given like the most ginormous amount of money like an entire room of treat.

N: You're giving us so much backstory, I didn't even know that.

S: If you think about inflation over the years  its just like an obscene obscene amount of money. And if you've lived through the centuries you're able to follow the trends of markets..

N: That's why I would be a vampire or travel through time, like people say they would kill Hitler and yes I would do that too but I would also get some good property, like get some good spaces like I'd go back to like 1899 when its cheap and buy it all up. One Park Ave apartment!

S: Thats why all vampires are pretty damn rich, like Louis in 2022 in Dubai he is really mega rich, he's got Francis Bacons.

N: I didn't even clock it. You also know he's rich cause his penthouse is so cold. Rich people really love stone floors and sharp edges, you know they want you to know if you're poor  you could die in here.

S: Exactly, and you're never comfortable..

N: Why do you think Lestat chose Louis cause as a viewer there's a question from moment one - do these men really love each other, are they just entangled, the whole time you're watching.. do I want them to be together?

S: Being a vampire is hard, its very difficult to endure and exist forever basically and you need to have quite a lot of strength and internal power to endure and Lestat recognizes that in Louis. When he sees him on the street and thinks that very very very beautiful man just pulled a knife on his brother in the middle of the street to look powerful to save his own skin and he has enough strength to do that and Lestat thinks this guy has enough strength to endure. And he's also got the hots for him really badly. He tries really hard to be a good normal guy as best as he can and I think when he has dinner with his familiy and he screws up, he does actually feel quite bad that he's made a mess of that cause he was trying really hard to be on his best behavior. Instead he hypnotizes his brother and makes a big scene. He's starts making innuendos and brings up God, which is never a good thing with Lestat. So he does his absolute best to pretend he's drinking wine and eating food.

N: What was it like to go from covid isolation to sex scenes?

S: Um, hmm. The sex scenes were kind of the easier part and we were all in the same bubble together and we were getting tested all the time like daily. It was a funny time cause we had these mad contacts on and they're quite cloudy. Jacob and I really clung to each other a lot of the time cause we couldn't really see, everyone else had masks on and you could only the person just in front of you. So it was this very comedic languid dream like place.

N: Can we talk more about the contacts, the makeup.. I cannot take the nails, the long nails, the cutting everyone.

S: The nails were a real process, originally they were press on / stick on nails and I had so many action I was always grabbing stuff and they were constantly popping off and so they said you should get acryllic. It took me a long long time to get used to acryllic nails and a lot of people would just come up and talk to me, like I would be in a restaurant and someone would just be like hey I love your nails. it was free reign for people to come up and chat so I became a nicer looking person with the nails.

N: It's like nails and hair. You always had short hair right?

S: Yeah it's usually always short. My hair was short when I first arrived in and it grew out over the course of the show, so we extended it with extensions and then it was my own hair. At first Rolin was like you know I think you could have short hair your hair looks good, I was like no no no no.. I think if you're gonna play a character like Lestat you kind of  have to have the nails and the hair. And he likes to accentuate things if he's really pissed off he'll flip it all the way back you know.

N: And there are time we are almost getting drag queen level drama from Lestat,  he wants you and everyone in a 10 mile radius to know when he's mad.

S: It's drama, he loves drama. I love him very dearly so I don't want to say anything bad about him but he wants to create a bit of drama he'll create a bit of drama. And if he wants to be really seductive in a moment and flip it and be really ugly, he will. He does what he wants whenever he wants and he'll make sure everyone's watching him do it cause he know he looks great doing it. He's a super vain guy but his heart is in the right place I would say.

N: Nope Sam, nope. Okay. Sam. I'm gonna have to push back. I know you played him but I'm saying you're wrong. .. One thing I think Rolin does so well that you and Jacob capture is this is now an interracial relationship, it charges these questions Anne was already asking - what is it to be human, what is power, what are relationships. [incinerator argument scene plays] Do you think that being a vampire being hundreds of years old, that Lestat think of himself as above race?

S: I don't know if he thinks of it like that, I think he definitely acknowledges the prejudices that exist, he acknolwedges it as soon as he meets Louis and I think once you become a vampire, that you can transcend that, thats what Lestat fully misunderstands about Louis' situation. I think he has a lot to learn in that regard.

N: Lestat is kinda like humans are trifles, we don't have time for it. Louis believes humanity is worthwhile and still wants to be apart of it.

S: I think he just doesn't understand yet, I think Louis at this point doesn't understand the enormity of living forever. He's just become a vampire, his family is still around, I think once you see everyone around you grow old die you see wars break outriots break out, you see the ages through the century, you see humanity is in this fucked up cycle that continues on the same hamster wheel. You're this fantastic creature that exists outside of humanity, why do you need to bother engaging with the small little fancies of these human beings. Then Lestat, there's his choice, I'm gonna live it up and have a good time and make a joke about it find it funny. He is very oscillating though so sometimes the joke is at his expense and sometimes the joke is at everyone else's expensve but he is the one who's always laughing. But what I will say is what Lestat feels about humanity is through art, like there is a beautiful pure expression and he really repsects and admires that and love musicians and artists. [opera scene plays] I mean what an amazing gift to read a scene like that I couldn't believe it when I was reading it and then it dawned on me that I would have to play the piano, sing, and speak Italian and kill somebody. Yeah, don't screw it up or you will die. But if you're a good musician in his eyes, he will make sure you're fully appreciated. If you're bad, yes you will die.

N: So the stakes are pretty chill. Either you're good and have a patron for life or you're bad and you die.

[teasing future episodes]

Jewelle Gomez Interview Highlights

N: In this episode, we learn a lot about vampires. I'm wondering how common these are in other vampire stories, like are they things Anne codified or have they been around. First, Lestat saying he had been so lonely, he says there are only about 100 other vampires in the world. What? I thought there were so many more?

J: I think the general idea has been vampires don't create much in the way of community that tehy are individualists in a great sense. No one ever really talks about the numbers but they seem to be very small so I think the tendency is to be inviduals.

N: They said the vampires can't drink the blood of the dead?

J: Yeah, thats a no no. You just don't be doing that. The heart has still got to be beating while you're taking the blood. Cause the blood from a dead person will draw you into death. That's pretty common, everyone knows that.

N: I thought maybe it was a taste issue like its a little sticky its a little coagulated that its not as good. But okay. Another tidbit we get is vampires can't read the minds of someone they've made. So like lestat can't read louis' mind?

J: I dont know if that is a general rule about makers. In general, vampires can read anybody's thoughts based on my extensive research/

N: Vampires live in coffins but do they need to sleep in coffins. I thought that was an old school idea like if you were a modern vampire you'd be like this is my studio apartment.

J: Every novel you read they sleep in coffins, although when I was writing a black lesbian vampire moving into the 20th century having escaped from slavery, she would not be sleeping in no coffin! I was like no no no no no. The big thing about coffin is the security, if you can get in there and lock it. In Dracula he carries his home soil so his coffin is lined with. In my books, I put her on a futon and its pretty uncomfortable but so is a coffin, behind a very thick door and she's good to go.

N: Alright thats the end of our lightning round, okay now Jewelle, what is your relationship with TVC and Anne Rice in general?

J: I read IWTV certainly when it first came out and I had written a single story a vampire story that got published in the Village Voice and then I thought I could write more of these cause people really liked it. Anne Rice's writing made me realize how sensual the vampire story could be and that meant the texture to a lot of my own writing of vampire stories.

N: What is it about vampires for you that you feel like lends itself to exploring queerness and sexuality more so than other monsters?

J: I think vampires have a natural sensuality. I mean the very act of taking blood is skin against skin, touching. The way that vampire interactions are set up is like a seduction in most cases. Bringing someone into vampire life involves an exchange of liquids, the lips touching, parts of the body, its sensual by its very nature. It draws in anyone who is interested in any sensual writing, queer writers allows us to create an outsider figure who's also the hero of the story. For we as queer people, being an outside being at the center our of own story.

N: Certainly this version of IWTV is doing its own thing but very much rooted in Anne's books. Before it was a little implicit, it was coded that Louis and Lestat had something going on. Here it's like this is what its about.

J: I think Louis and Lestat's relationship is core to the story and what moves the story and because its the 21st century we can now look at how two men come together and can find each other. What's really moving about this particular version is when Lestat talks about how lonely he has been for so long and I think he's giving voice to what a lot of queer people feel before they find their queer lover. So its very very moving to be able to experience that loneliness before he's able to find the lover he's been looking for.

N: There's so many ethical questions about being a vampire, like you're a vampire that doesn't wanna kill people. Do you think a vampire has to kill people in order to be really powerful?

J: I don't think so. A vampire has the power to take blood and not kill. To take small amounts from lots of people and not kill. And that's the way I wanted my character to go cause she's creating community, I think the idea that Louis could take blood and not kill, he does finally get to that when we see the interview w/ the older Molloy. I also know that all of us donate blood to the Red Cross we don't die when we give a pint of blood. So I think its possible to donate that amount of blood to a vampire and still live. That made more sense to me, that's how I created my vampires.

N: I love the idea that a vampire would take your blood and give you Orange Juice and cookies. Like here's a couple dried biscuits, take a seat for 10 minutes.

[megamagimugi]

Hey there, my friend! I saw you reblogging an artist ask game, so please allow me to make you a few questions 🥰

How about 2, 12 (I'm interested if you're willing to share!), 15 and 25? 💖

Sure thing, my friend!

Based on this:

2. How long have you been drawing?

Short answer: for as long as I can remember.

Long answer: I drew a lot as a kid (fun fact: I used to make quick uncolored pencil drawings to tell stories, kinda like storyboards; I would do it for hours and use so much paper that my parents eventually told me to draw on both sides😅). The fact that my older sister was very good at drawing - and I was very competitive - also motivated me to work hard and try to get as good as her. Then I drew less often in high school and in my first college since I had less time and was focused on schoolwork, and then started doing it more often again as I now study graphic design and would like to maybe become an animator if possible - the dream job of my childhood that I gave up on too early. When it comes to digital art specifically... I got my tablet, the very same one I use to this day (Wacom Intuos 4), for Christmas when I was about 15 or 16. Because it was so hard for me to learn how to draw digitally, and like I said I soon started spending less time drawing in general, sometimes I didn't use my tablet for long periods of time. That, of course, eventually changed into using it nearly every day.

12. Is it okay for people to ask you about your process?

Yes, it's okie dokie to ask!

...Or did you mean you wanted to know right now?

In which case, well, it depends on the medium and the specific piece since I don't always do my art the same way. Generally in digital art, for the characters I like to do a rough sketch first, then either a cleaner sketch or lineart (I rarely bother to do both, even in animation - unless my initial rough animation is like... really rough and basic, just to get the feel of the motion). Then I do flat colors, often on separate layers, and then shade/render each part. Or I do the whole character minus the sketch on one layer, it really depends. For example, I did Mario and Luigi both on one layer in my Brothership repaint/wallpaper, other that the yellow glow on their hands. For backgrounds... it really depends, but I usually build them up layer after layer, from general shapes to details, like a normal painting. Of course, I use some sort of sketch for most of them too, unless I don't need it because the BG is very simple or abstract. If I don't want my sketch to be visible, I basically just remove it and refine the parts that look bad without it, sometimes adding some brush strokes imitating lineart in some places. Happens to both characters and backgrounds. I use different brushes to create different effects, but in the majority of my works I've been sharing on here, I only really use a hard round pressure opacity brush for both the final sketch and rendering.

15. How long does an average piece take you to complete?

This one is always tricky to answer (yes, I've been asked this before by some classmates). Uh, several hours? It's really hard to tell exactly simply because I rarely just sit down and complete a whole piece in one go. Unless it's just a simple sketch/doodle. So in reality my average pieces often take me a few days.

25. Do you like to draw in silence, or with music?

There's one piece of advice in Richard Williams' fantastic book The Animator's Survival Kit that I don't think I'll ever be able to heed. It's this one:

Sorry but no, I do almost everything with music. It makes things more enjoyable and ironically makes it easier to focus in the long run. So, definitely drawing with music💯😁

Thank you so much for the ask, @silenzahra!😊

[bitter-panacea]

Goultard's backstory, comparing the Dofus manga and the special episode Part 3 - The Horrors part 1

Part 1 Part 2

Aka the Katar incident aka everything's just gone to shit

One day, Goultard comes home to an empty house and finds a letter, with a plan, signed by Katar.

Goultard : Oh, dinner's not served... That's not normal.... / Dear Goultard, I've invited your family to a little shindig at my place... You're cordially invited to join us. Katar. P.S. : I've drawn a little map on the back of this letter.

(Look at him... so angry... fangs... so cute)

Here's the letter in the special episode :

Surprise! Tu ne me connais pas mais j'organise une petite sauterie en ta faveur. Comme tu n'étais pas là, nous nous sommes permis d'inviter ta famille. Suis la carte au dos et rejoins nous vite. P.S : N'oublie pas d'affuter ta lame. Katar.

Surprise! You do not know me but I'm hosting a little shindig in your favor. Since you weren't home, we took the liberty of inviting your family. Follow the map on the back and join us soon. P.S : don't forget to sharpen your blade. Katar

First off, this letter (the voice actor's performance of it) alone has more personality in 15 seconds than Katar does in the entirety of the dofus manga. Katar looks and acts very differently in the special episode and in the manga. And I won't lie, the latter is pretty boring, especially in this volume. In general, I don't particularly care about Katar and think very little about him. But I really like what they did with him in the special ep. And of course, how can I not mention Mathias Kozlowski? Who does such an AMAZING job as Katar... He's soooo good. He does many voices in this universe, he's also Kriss La Krass, Guy (in the Dofus movie), Grany Smisse, Ogrest (Giant) and additional voices. (Bruno Choël is also FANTASTIC as Goultard btw... The entire cast is gold actually but I'm not here to talk about french voice acting)

Both letters have Katar use "une petite sauterie". "Shindig" is the closest thing I could find but it's not exactly right. Une sauterie is a small intimate and informal gathering. It's a very old fashioned word and is now only used jokingly. It's a cute and silly word and adding the "petite" in front of it makes it sound even cuter and sillier.

"Surprise!" No comment, perfect. I love characters who act silly but in a very unnerving way....

"We took the liberty of inviting your family" already hinting that Katar isn't alone!! I love that.

And Goultard runs all the way to where Katar is keeping his family hostage.

Goultard : If anything happened to them, I would never forgive myself! (And it's true, he never does)

Goultard : Good grief! I'm finally here! The moutain of a thousand screams.... aka boob mountain... (fucking boob moutain man i dont know)

The dialogue between Katar and Goultard right before they start to fight is a little different too.

Goultard : What... What is this sensation? Every muscle in my body is tensing up and... I'm shaking...

Katar : Impressive! Your body reacts instinctively to my presence! A bit like a sixth sense... I was not wrong about you! / Goultard : Who are you and what have you done to my family?

Katar : My name is Katar and your family is fine for now! They're in the cave behind me! You only have to do one thing to see them again.. Beating me!

Goultard : Very well! Now, let me tell you one thing, Katar! I meet lunatics like you every day. It's my job. But you, You're gonna suffer! I'll be merciless... Because you see... No one messes with my family.

Goultard : Ready? / Katar : I was not asking for that much... A violent fight... Gratuitous, with no justification! Now that suits me wonderfully!

(Can they both just shut up??? Oh my god!!!)

In the episode it goes like this :

Katar : Welcome Goultard. I'm Katar. We were impatiently waiting for you. We've wanted to meet a hero of your caliber for so long.

Goultard : Where are they? I swear, If you did them even the slightest harm..

Katar : Settle down. Let's not get worked up. I assure you they want for nothing. If you wish to see them, grant me a dance.

(WHY IS HE SO PRETTY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH)

It's shorter, straight to the point. Goultard doesn't give a shit who this guy is or what's his problem. He wastes no time, refuses to indulge Katar's sick sense of humor and immediately asks about the only one thing that truly matters to him. You can clearly tell he's furious AND panicked. Terrified of what might have happened to his loved ones.

They have a very interesting dynamic... I think what works so well here is that, Katar dismisses and minimizes the brutality of the situation, not taking it seriously, like it's a joke or a game. Which is exactly the way Goultard behaves most of the time. But in this specific situation and with what's at stake, he can't not take it seriously. Very destabilizing for Goultard.

In the manga, Katar initiates. Goultard is taken aback. At first it looks like he doesn't stand a chance against Katar.

Goultard : Where is he? / Katar : Tired already? Impossible, I can't have been this wrong about you... Move... You can do better... Come on hero, fight! Or i'll kill you, your shitlings and your bitches...

But he manages to turn the tables.

Katar : Seems like you're getting caught up in the game! / Goultard : Believe me... This is everything but a game.

In the special episode, Goultard attacks first and immediately has the upper hand on Katar.

Katar is a sacrier, it makes sense for him to wait until he's injured before fighting back and taking control of the situation.

Get wrecked <3

There's a little moment i like in the manga that's not in the special ep, right before the reveal that Goultard's family is already dead. Interesting to know that at this point Gou holds the belief that hunting monsters is fine but killing humans isn't.

Goultard : I know terminating a human being is wrong.. But I sense an evil too great inside you! You have to disappear! / Katar : Tell me, Goultard... What makes you think I'm human? And above all, what makes you believe you can defeat me? You hit like an old lady, Goultard! It looks like you're holding back, like you're scared to let loose... I think I have the solution! Come over here... Go say hello to your dear family!

Kicking him in the balls, grabbing his hair and dragging him through the dirt. I like that. I really like that.

(baby baybay bayayy bayby baby byabbaby baabyy)

This is horrible.... AND BRUNO CHOEL MY GOD!!! I'm begging them to make Goultard go through the horrors in the next season because I need more of that. He's just so good at crying and begging and whimpering and and and. He did say in an interview that he's very passionate and usually cries for real when playing these kind of scenes so the emotions in his voice feel as honest as possible. Simply amazing.

Part 4

[jounosparticles]

What Your Heart Desires

(Part One)

Jouno notices something is off when Tetchou gets oddly flustered at a simple compliment

genre: fluff

word count: 1758

When it comes to finding the truth, Jouno is easily the best of the Hunting Dogs. He can see through people’s words by listening to the sound of their heartbeat, and can easily talk his way into getting just about anyone to tell him the truth. Due to this, people tend to never bother lying about anything around Jouno, since he is not afraid to call people out on their true intent.

When sent on missions, Jouno is typically paired with Tetchou; the two make a fantastic team, and have taken down thousands of criminals effortlessly. Despite the fact that they argue non-stop, the work partners understand each other deeply.

After completing a mission a lot quicker than expected, the two decide to go grab a coffee before returning to the Hunting Dog’s base.

“Just go sit down, I’ll order for the two of us. No need to scare another barista with your horrific food choices,” Jouno smirks at his coworker. Tetchou goes and sits at the table the two usually occupy.

Jouno’s hearing is extremely sensitive, so finding a quiet place that serves good coffee made the two come here after a lot of missions.

“Here.” Tetchou takes the coffee that Jouno is handing him. He watches as his partner sits across from him.

“You did surprisingly well today, Tetchou. Usually you’re a pain to work with, but today you made the job much easier.” Surprisingly, that was one of the nicer things Jouno has said to his coworker. Tetchou knows that Jouno isn’t actually a mean person, but he definitely likes to argue and throw jabs whenever he gets the chance.

“You’re acting awfully nice today,” Tetchou sarcastically responds.

“Is it wrong for me to appreciate your work from time to time?”

“No, it’s just unusual of you.”

“Don’t get used to it.” Jouno takes a sip of his drink. He couldn’t help but notice that Tetchou’s heartrate raised a little after the comment. That’s odd, I barely said anything to him. Jouno thought to himself. Am I really that flattering?

Tetchou interrupts his train of thought, “you did well too.”

“Of course I did, I am the greatest Hunting Dog after all.”

“Not in combat.”

“Oh shut up, your sword would have nothing against me.”

Tetchou sighs, he knows he won’t win in an argument against Jouno. He enjoys trying to bother him, seeing his coworker’s pissed off face is something he adores. Jouno has always been entertaining in conversation, however, lately those feelings Tetchou has felt have began to evolve a bit. Jouno seems a bit more endearing lately; the way he smiles as he talks, the way he says Tetchou’s name, the way his hair always looks soft, it all makes Tetchou feel a way he can’t seem to feel about anyone else. He wasn’t sure why, but he couldn’t stop imagining the way Jouno complimented his performance on the mission a few moments prior.

The white haired man very quickly noticed that his partner was breathing very shallow, as if he had something on his mind. “What is it? Your breathing sounds off.” This behaviour was unusual, Tetchou is typically very collected, having a slow heartbeat combined with deep breathing.

Tetchou doesn’t know how to respond to this. He doesn’t exactly understand what he’s feeling either. He feels happy, but also confused. Why was one tiny comment filling his mind? It wasn’t even a big deal, yet it was oddly affirming to hear. Still, Tetchou wouldn’t want to honestly answer that question, that just sounds like an easy way to get made fun of. “Nothing is wrong, I’m just tired today,” the man says quickly and sternly. Hopefully that was believable enough for Jouno to just move on.

A lie? Why would he lie to me? Surely he knows I can tell that isn’t the truth. Jouno thinks to himself. It was extremely out-of-character for Tetchou to lie, he is typically honest to everybody he speaks with. Jouno scrunches his eyebrows in confusion. “You know that I can tell you’re lying, right? What’s gotten into you? You’ve been acting off since we sat down.” Jouno is clearly frustrated. There’s no way it actually has to do with me saying he did well, right?

Tetchou has no clue of what to say in response. He decided to just ignore the question. The two sit in silence for a few moments, sipping at their lattes and thinking to themselves. Eventually, Jouno finally breaks the tension.

“Did I do something?” He asks sincerely. Almost immediately, he could feel the body heat of the man in front of him raise. I was right, he thought to himself. Maybe I can say something else later to test this.

“No. It was just a good mission, I’m not sure why I sound off to you.”

Another lie? I could just leave him be for now. Or maybe I could torment him for a bit. Jouno warmly smiles at Tetchou, before taking another sip of his drink. “About today’s mission, you cut down the enemy really quickly! I’m still rather impressed.”

“Thank you. It really isn’t a big deal.”

“If it wasn’t a big deal, why is your heart fluttering again whenever I talk about it? You know Tetchou, I heard it when I first mentioned the mission as well.” Jouno looks smugly, “are my compliments just that sweet to you?” The brunette could tell that Jouno was having fun with this. Yet, despite the embarrassment, he was enjoying the feeling. Still, there’s no way he would outright admit to that.

“You’re just trying to bother me, aren’t you? Sorry, your tactics don’t work on me.” Tetchou grins.

“It sounds like they’re working.” The white haired man finishes his coffee, and stops to think. Oh, this will be fun.

Tetchou finishes his drink as well, and stands up. Jouno stands as well, “come with me Tetchou, lets go for a quick walk before heading to the base.”

“We have work to do, we should head back now.” Tetchou argues, in reality he would adore going on a walk with Jouno, but work comes first.

“Don’t worry, it doesn’t look like we have anything except paperwork to get done for the rest of the day. A quick walk will be completely fine.” Jouno insists. Usually, Jouno also opts to get work done first, so him insisting they put off the job is odd. Tetchou sighs in agreement, and they leave the cafe.

The two take a walk through a small forest near the cafe. Since it’s the middle of a weekday, it’s extremely quiet. The two walk in silence for a while, while Jouno thinks of new ways to bother Tetchou. Does he just like compliments? Does it have to do with me specifically? It wouldn’t hurt to test him.

Jouno steps a bit closer to his work partner, who is moving very quietly. Jouno moves a bit closer, brushing his hand against Tetchou’s. “Sorry about that! I didn’t realize I moved that close to you,” he lies to the brunette. Immediately, Tetchou started feeling his own face heat up. Jouno feels this, and holds back a smile. So, he liked that too? Is it really possible that he sees me in that light? Jouno can’t help but feel a bit smug over this. The idea of someone swooning over him makes him feel great. But of all people, he wasn’t expecting Tetchou to be the one to feel this way. This idea made Jouno feel genuinely happy for some reason. He always secretly admired Tetchou, but never thought to see him in anything but a friendly light. Maybe there was more to his own feelings that he was avoiding.

“No worries,” Tetchou replied. Was that on purpose? Or did he actually touch my hand by accident? he thought to himself. It didn’t really bother him either way, but feeling Jouno’s soft hand against his own felt nice. I shouldn’t think too much about it. It’s not even a big deal.

“Why did we have to walk out here again? We should head back soon,” Tetchou asks.

“Just thought it would make for a good break. Besides, I’m enjoying listening to you.”

“You are? We’re barely talking.”

Jouno smiles, “I’m listening to your heart, and the way it beats a little faster whenever I talk to you. The way it started racing when I grazed your hand was a wonderful sound.”

“It surprised me, of course my heart would beat a bit faster.” Tetchou rolls his eyes. He doesn’t really know what to take from this situation, why was Jouno insisting on talking about this? It’s not like Tetchou would willingly explain his feelings. He couldn’t say his thoughts out loud. Jouno made him happy, happier than any other person does. Jouno felt warm, despite his cold exterior. Jouno was fun to talk to, and to work with. He loved looking at Jouno, his pretty hair, his cute smile, the way his uniform fit around his body. He loved hearing Jouno speak, he loved saying Jouno’s name. Everything about this man made Tetchou feel safe. Do I really have feelings for him? Can he tell? Is this why he’s acting like this? Tetchou is dumbfounded about his own feelings. He had felt like this for a while, but didn’t think to equate the feelings to anything more than friendship until Jouno started teasing him.

Jouno lets out a small sigh. “Mhm, okay. I can understand your heartbeat changing due to being shocked, but it doesn’t explain why your temperature rose. I can feel that as well.” Jouno found the attention he was getting extremely charming, his mind filled with ideas on how to torment his partner about these newfound feelings.

“I’m not sure why. I’m sure it’s nothing.” Tetchou quickly responded. He was clearly trying to dismiss the topic, which just made Jouno more tempted to bother him.

Jouno stops walking, “Tetchou.”

“What is it?” Tetchou faces him.

Jouno moves slightly closer, and places his hand on the side of the brunette’s head, running his fingers through his hair. “Listen to me.” Tetchou doesn’t respond, Jouno can hear the anxiousness his partner is feeling. His reaction makes Jouno smirk. He pulls himself closer, whispering in Tetchou’s ear:

“You can try to lie to me all you want, but your entire body is telling me how you truly feel.” Before Tetchou even gets to respond, Jouno turns away.

“Let’s get back to work, we’ve been gone long enough!”

[dorthea07]

~ Falling ~

Background: Aidan & Y/n’s relationship over the years. Warnings: Short.

~~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~<3~~

~ 3 Years Before ~

Aidan stood along the familiar red carpet he had become accustomed to from a young age.

A mic stood a few inches from him as an interviewer urged to have a word with him.

“Aidan, if you had to tell us one celebrity you have a crush on, who would you say?” The interviewer asked with a bright smile.

“I would probably say Y/n Y/l/n,” Aidan laughs lightly as his face flushes a light pink color.

Aidan had always had a school boy crush on Y/n since he had seen her acting debut in a favorite show of his.

Y/n had always managed to capture his attention, not only for her beauty, but by her intelligence and humor.

She had a southern belle like charm to her as well that was impossible to resist.

It would make her act differently than everyone else, always making sure to include everyone in a conversation and saying exactly what was on her mind.

Y/n was the kind of girl people would write a song or poem about.

“Oh I know her,” The interviewer smiled wider. “She’s a fantastic young woman!”

“I think so too,” Aidan nods. “She’s an incredible person and actress.”

~ A Year Later ~

The same interviewer stood a few feet in front of Aidan, with a mic between the two.

“So what is it like working with Y/n, Aidan?” The interviewer asked with a cheerful smile.

“It’s very nice,” Aidan nodded with a smile. “She takes her job seriously and acts very well, but still manages to make us all laugh and smile on set.”

“Your series characters are engaged so you are bound to have onscreen chemistry,” The interviewer stated. “Do you think something could arise between you two because of that?”

Aidan laughed lightly, “I think she just sees me as a friend, so no.”

~ Now ~

The same interviewer from every interview about Y/n and Five before was again standing in front of Aidan with a mic between the two of them.

“So Aidan,” The interviewer starts with a smile. “I heard that you and Y/n are finally engaged. Is this true?”

“Yes,” Aidan smiles and nods. “We have been engaged for about five months now.”

“Well that’s fantastic, and how did you get together in the very beginning of your relationship?” The interviewer gushes. “I know fans are dying to hear the original story from you.”

Aidan chuckles lightly, “The other members of the cast always wanted us to get together. They knew we would make a good couple and they were obviously right.”

Aidan turns to the camera for a quick wink before looking back at the interviewer.

“They all knew I was pretty much head over heels for her and she was the same for me, so they ended up pulling a classic romance novel cliche and locked us in her RV.”

The interviewer let out a laugh as Aidan continued the story.

“We then pretty much ended up confessing to each other and the rest is history,” Aidan finishes.

Y/n walks over with a smile, placing her hand on Aidan’s arm gently. He looks at her, his dimple more prominent than it was before as his smile seems to brighten by her presence.

“He was the first to confess and I was the first to take the next step in asking what happened next,” Y/n nods at Aidan.

“She kissed me off set that day for the first time,” Aidan takes her hand in his, placing a gentle kiss on the top of it.

Y/n lets out a small school girl like giggle at his gesture.

“Wow,” The interviewer smiles. “Well, the fans and I certainly agree that you are a lovely couple.”

“Thank you,” Aidan smiles, intertwining his hand with Y/n’s, beside him.