#You must read this cursedness so I don't suffer alone | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

maratsbathtub · 1 year ago

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so i was talking with my mom (a historian) about the afterlife and how historical figures having to share apartments would be hilarious. And then i brought up the frenchies, and what they would be doing after death.

I present to you, my mom's thoughts on the matter:

They would be running a spa. All of them. Lavoisier and his wife would be running the cafe (are there cafes at spas??? I don't know??? I was too busy dying inside to ask). Fouche runs finances. Robespierre does hairdressing stuff and danton does pedicures. Herault would be the (female?) waitress and fabre is the apothecary?? I guess? (I think my mom meant he runs the front desk) Louis XVI would be the janitor and marie Antoinette takes care of pets.

And i vetoed charlotte corday to ever be there. That was all i got to say.

And napoleon is just there to help

#If i had to hear my mom explain to me this in graphic detail #You must read this cursedness so I don't suffer alone #Marat was also here somewhere but i spared him the suffering he deserves a day at the spa not to work at one #Anyways time to tag all these frenchies #I'm sure they won't haunt my ass for this sacrilege #Lavoiser #joseph fouche #maximilien robespierre #Danton #hérault de sechelles #Fabre d'Eglantine #Louis XVI #marie antoinette #Napoleon #No i won't tag corday cause fuck her that's why #I'm sorry for inflicting this upon you all I wanted was to talk with my mom about quevedo and gongora having to share a flat but alas

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