#You don't have to shed your scalp.

[punkshort]

i know who you are | 3. the accident

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Chapter Summary: You and Joel spend some time getting to know each other, but during dinner with Tommy and Maria, the truth comes out about your accident.

Chapter Warnings: language, angst, pining, sad!Joel, amnesia, slow burn, mild description of head wound/stitches, flirting, clickers, violence and some descriptions of injuries/blood

WC: 10.4K

Series Masterlist

Two Weeks Later

"This place is a lot bigger than I thought. I feel like I see someone new every day."

"Well, your brain did a factory reset, so you kind of are seeing new people every day," Ellie joked at breakfast one morning. Joel had been scheduled on early morning patrol shifts lately, so it was just the two of you before Ellie's classes started. You felt bad, but you grew to enjoy these mornings with just her. She was easy to get along with and she didn't pester you constantly about your memory loss. It was like she just accepted it for what it was and moved on. Joel, on the other hand, was a different story.

"What are you doing today?" she asked, pushing away her bowl of oatmeal.

"I have to go get these stitches removed," you said, your fingers coming up to brush across your injured scalp. "Couldn't come any sooner. They are so itchy."

She hummed and crossed her arms. "Surprised Joel didn't wanna come with you. He's been hovering over you non-stop."

"Yeah, tell me about it," you muttered. When you caught the playful glean in her eye, you backtracked. "Not that I don't appreciate everything he's done for me, it's just..." you trailed off, trying to find the right words.

"It's just a lot?" she offered, and you nodded, relieved that she understood.

"I didn't exactly tell him, either," you said, dropping your gaze to pick at your cuticle in shame. "Every time I go to the clinic, he scares the shit out of that poor doctor."

She laughed softly and stretched her arms out behind her head. "Joel does that to people. He comes off like a pitbull but in reality? He's just a golden retriever."

A slow smile stretched across your face as you absorbed her words, then burst out laughing.

"That is-" you began, cutting yourself off with another laugh, "the most accurate description I could ever possibly think of."

"I've known him for a long time, what can I say?" she said with a grin while throwing her hands up in the air.

Your laughter died down as you stared at the table, lost in thought. Glancing up at Ellie, you decided to see what else she might shed some light on.

"Do you know of a Ben and Lisa?"

She froze and looked at you quizzically for a moment before dropping her hands back down onto the table.

"Yeah, do you remember them?"

"No, no," you said quickly, waving her off. "I kept a journal. Y'know, from before. And I was reading it the other day and I mentioned them. Are they around?"

Ellie glanced around the somewhat crowded room before meeting your eyes again. "No, not today. They don't really come out much," she said, examining you carefully. "They have a small house on the outskirts of town. They are... homebodies, I guess? I think they've been in here, like, twice, since you guys arrived."

"So, they came here with me?" you confirmed, and she nodded.

"Yeah, the three of you arrived together," she said. Her eyes glanced up and saw a few classmates heading out the front door. "I better go, school's starting soon," she said, pushing her chair back and grabbing her backpack.

"Yeah, okay," you said, sitting back in your chair. "Thanks, Ellie," you called after her, and she shot you a quick wave before running to catch up with her friends.

You wished you had more time to ask her about Ben and Lisa. Were they together? Were they siblings? Friends? How did you meet them? What did they know about your past?

The questions were piling up as you let your mind wander. You didn't even realize Maria, Tommy's wife, had approached your table until she said your name for the second time.

"Sorry," you told her, shaking your head.

She smiled and pulled out a chair, joining you at your now empty table. "Don't worry about it. I wanted to check on you. How have you been feeling?"

"Better," you said honestly. "I haven't needed the Tylenol really, so I'm going to bring the rest back to Nick this morning."

"That's fantastic," she said, leaning forward. She regarded you quietly for a moment before speaking again. "Any luck on your memories?"

You sighed and shook your head. It was inevitable - everyone eventually asked you the same question, either morbid curiosity or genuine concern encouraging them. And you tried not to let it bother you, you really did. But you couldn't help but feel like a failure every time when the answer was no.

And then Maria asked the next question everybody always asked.

"How's Joel handling everything?"

You fought the urge to roll your eyes. Of course this was hard for him. It was hard for you, too, just in a different way.

"Alright, I guess."

"Are you two getting along? I know Tommy mentioned you were nervous-"

"Yeah," you said, cutting her off. "It was a little weird at first but it's not so bad now." You glanced around the dining hall, which was mostly empty. "Can you tell me a little bit about him? About us? I would ask Joel, but any time he tells me about some memory, I can see it hurts him. And I just can't stand to see that look in his eye again."

Maria gave you a sympathetic look and squeezed your hand. "I get it. It must be hard, I'm so sorry," she said, and you could feel the tears beginning to prick the corners of your eyes.

"I just feel like I'm always letting him down," you said, swallowing the lump in your throat.

"You're not. Hey, look at me," she said, forcing you to drag your eyes up to meet hers. "You're not letting him down. He loves you. You have no idea how much. That man has been head over heels since the moment you met. He'd do anything for you-"

"I know, and that's what makes this so much worse!" you exclaimed. "I'm sitting around that house all day - our house - waiting for my brain to fucking work and give him the person he's waiting for and I just can't! I can't-" you slammed your palms flat on the table. "I can't fucking-" you buried your face in your hands as you tried to conceal your tears. Maria rubbed soothing circles on your back, giving you time to collect yourself.

"Sounds to me like you're going a little stir-crazy."

You dragged a shaky breath in and nodded, letting your hands fall to your lap.

"What if we got you assigned some work around town? Something light, nothing too strenuous. Would that help?" she asked softly, and your pulse began to return to normal.

"Yeah, I think that would be nice," you said, flashing her a small smile.

"Your choice, then," she said, pulling her hand back, "what are you good at or interested in? I figure stables are probably not a good idea. Tommy said you were having trouble riding. Is there anything you'd like to do?"

You pursed your lips and thought for a moment.

"I'm not sure... can I get back to you?" you asked, realizing once again that you knew very little about yourself.

"Of course," Maria said before standing up from her chair. "You know where to find me whenever you think of something. Or if you just want to talk... I'm here, okay?"

You gave her a watery smile before whispering your thanks, then watched her make her way towards the doors. You sighed and looked around, realizing you were the only one left after the breakfast rush, so you pushed yourself to your feet and followed Maria's footsteps. You had a few more hours before Joel was supposed to come back from patrol, so you decided to walk over to the infirmary and get your stitches removed.

The streets of Jackson were mercifully quiet. Most people were working and the kids were in school, so you didn't run into too many folks on your way towards the other end of town. You wrapped your arms around yourself a little tighter. The chill in the air still lingered from overnight, making you shiver. As you walked, you looked around at the buildings like you normally did, trying your hardest to shake loose a memory, or at this point, even a flicker of a moment, but nothing came.

You trudged up the steps to the infirmary and stepped inside, grateful to be back indoors where it was warm. A little bell rang above your head, announcing your presence, and a moment later you heard Nick's footsteps coming down the hallway. When he lifted his head and saw you, his eyes immediately scanned the room, searching for Joel.

"All alone today?" he asked, then motioned for you to follow him.

"Yeah, Joel's busy," you said, and you swore you could see his shoulders relax.

"I know the feeling," he said, standing next to an empty exam room and holding his arm out to his side, inviting you to enter first, so you did. "I've been trying to get around to doing inventory for weeks, but I'm swamped. Can't seem to find a quiet day," he continued as he opened and closed some cabinets. He pulled on a pair of gloves and opened a drawer for some scissors before placing it on a clean washcloth next to the bed and putting his glasses on.

"Oh, speaking of inventory," you said, leaning to the side so you could fish the pills out of your jeans pocket. You held them out to him with a smile. "Didn't need them all."

"Excellent. Thank you," he said, plucking the baggie from your fingers and setting them down on the counter next to the scissors. "Glad they helped. And again, I'm sorry I couldn't offer anything stronger-"

"Don't be sorry, I understand," you said, then tucked your chin into your chest so he could get a good look at the back of your head. He began to carefully snip away at the irritating thread, taking his time to pull each and every piece out without tugging too much on your skin. You noticed aside from the two of you, the office sounded quiet.

"All alone today, too?" you asked.

"Yes, unfortunately," he said with a sigh. "My aide, Monica, got poached from me. They needed someone on patrol since-" he cut himself off and cleared his throat, and you frowned before you realized what he was about to say.

"Since they had to replace me," you finished for him.

"Yes."

Your lips pressed into a thin line as Nick continued to work away at your stitches. Another casualty in the hurricane that your accident seemed to cause.

"Hey, what if I helped you?" you blurted out, and his hands paused.

"You want to be my aide?"

"Sure. Well, do I need any medical knowledge? I don't know much, but I can help you with inventory or cleaning instruments or... whatever else you might need."

You could sense his hesitation without even having to see his face and you knew in an instant he was thinking about Joel.

"Maria approached me this morning about a job. She said it would be good for me and I agreed. But if I'm not qualified, I understand-"

"No, no, it's not that," he said, and you rolled your eyes. Of course not.

"Joel isn't the boss of me," you said after a moment. He stepped backwards and you lifted your head up to look at him.

"He's an intimidating man," Nick said by way of explanation. He snapped his gloves off and tossing them in the trash. "Why don't you run it by him first? As a favor to me?" he added with a half smile. You sighed and nodded before sliding off the bed.

"Sure, I'll talk to him when he gets back," you agreed, following Nick towards the front door. You thanked him before heading back down the street, your fingers gingerly tracing your closed wound before you shoved your hands into your pockets.

How the hell could one man manage to scare half the town the way Joel Miller did? You thought you were beginning to see a glimmer of the man underneath the hardened exterior, but what on earth drew you to him in the first place? What did your past self see in him that made you so enamored? And why couldn't you see it now? You were afraid the answer didn't so much lie with Joel, but with you.

You desperately needed to discover more of the person you were before your accident. Maybe then you would get some more insight.

When you got back to Joel's house, you decided to take what little quiet time you had left and read some more of your journal. As the sun rose in the sky, the day began to heat up a bit, taking away that frigid chill in the air, so you cracked a window in his living room and curled up on a worn out, but very comfortable, arm chair.

You flipped through the pages, your eyes landing on the last entry you read: Joel lied to me.

You never asked him about it. Either you were too afraid of the answer or you were too afraid he wouldn't tell the truth. At first, you tried to convince yourself that it was nothing. That maybe you had just gotten into a fight on that particular day and you were mad. But seeing how sporadically you had updated the journal, you got the feeling you wouldn't have written it unless it was important.

And why wouldn't you have elaborated? What could it have been? Something that was so serious, you didn't want to risk putting it down in writing?

You hadn't realized how long you were staring at those four words until you heard Joel's heavy footsteps climbing up the stairs of the porch. You snapped the book shut and looked up just as he opened the door. His dark eyes found you immediately and, as usual, you saw what you always saw - relief in seeing you again, the joy one had when they saw their other half, the attraction a man has for the one he loves.

Damn him and his expressive eyes.

"Hey," you said with a small smile, "how was patrol?"

"Not too bad," he replied, kicking off his boots. "Quiet. No infected. Me 'n Alex made short work of our route," he said, strolling over to collapse into the couch next to your chair. He rubbed his eyes with a deep sigh, his head resting on the back of the couch.

"Tired?"

"Yeah," he said, dropping his hand to his lap and rolling his head in your direction. "Glad I got tomorrow off. Maybe we can do somethin' together."

"Yeah, okay," you agreed. Maybe it would be a good opportunity to learn more about him without directly asking. His eyes drifted down to the journal in your lap and he jutted his chin towards it.

"Read anythin' interesting?"

Looking down at it for a brief moment, you thought about asking him what he lied about, but you ultimately decided against it.

"Yeah, actually," you said, flipping a different page open. "I wrote about a Ben and Lisa. Ellie told me we arrived together and they keep to themselves," you continued, looking up at him. His expression was unreadable. "Maybe I should pay them a visit one of these days. Maybe they can tell me a little about myself before-"

"Yeah, maybe," he said suddenly, then stood up to head towards the kitchen. You frowned, your eyes following him as he filled a glass of water. When he turned back to you, you were still looking at him, waiting for him to say something else.

"Why don't you give it a little time before you go seein' them," he suggested after downing his water in one gulp.

"It's been two weeks," you said quietly, "how much more time should I give it?" He shrugged and strolled back into the living room, leaning against the doorframe.

"What'dya wanna know?" he asked, avoiding your question. "I know you better than anyone. I can answer your questions."

"I didn't know you the whole ten years, though," you reminded him, unfolding your legs from the chair. "It sounds like they knew me longer. I just thought they could tell me how I survived-"

"For what?" he snapped, and his tone took a sudden turn. When you met his gaze again, the warmth was gone, and in its place was a face of stone. "What does that matter?" he asked, his voice rising a little. "You're here, you did what you had to do. We all did. What's the point in rehashin' it?"

"What's the point?" you repeated, bewildered. "The point is so I can learn about myself. So I can figure out the person I became, the person you fell in love with!"

Something flickered across his face for a brief moment before his eyes softened and his shoulders relaxed.

"You're right, I'm sorry," he said, the edge to his voice now gone. "I'll take you to see 'em one of these days. We'll go together. I haven't seen 'em in a while myself. It'd be good to catch up," he added.

"Okay," you said slowly, "thank you." He took a deep breath and angled his head towards the stairs.

"I'm gonna take a quick shower," he mumbled, and you nodded, your eyes following him up the steps until he disappeared around the corner.

Joel Miller was an incredibly difficult man to figure out. Just when you thought you knew who he was, he did something like that and it made you second guess yourself. You had determined that aggressive side came out when he was protecting the ones he loved. So who was he protecting this time?

"What'dya wanna do today?" Joel asked you around a mouthful of eggs from across your kitchen table.

"Um, I don't know," you said, pushing your food around on your plate uncomfortably. You thought spending time alone with him was a good idea, but when you woke up that morning, you felt nervous. "Did you have anything in mind?"

He sat back in his chair and wiped his mouth with a napkin. "If you were feelin' up for it, thought I could take you outside the walls a bit. Maybe teach you how to ride again."

You perked up at his suggestion. For some reason, you didn't consider leaving Jackson as an option.

"Yeah, that sounds great," you said with a grin, and his chest warmed at the sight. He missed seeing you smile. Then he remembered something that might make you smile again. He stood up quickly, his chair sliding back across the hardwood floor, and walked over to his backpack, still hanging by the door from yesterday.

"What are you doing?" you called after him, but he didn't reply until he reentered the room with his hands behind his back.

"Forgot I gotcha somethin' when I was out yesterday," he said, trying to bite back his smile. It didn't even occur to him until the last second that you might not like what he was about to give you, that maybe your tastes were different ten years ago, but it was too late now. Nervously, he held out two worn paperback books. You stood up with a curious look on your face and took them in your hands, your eyes running over the covers quickly before turning them over and reading the backs. He shifted his weight as he anxiously waited for your reaction, and when he was rewarded with another huge smile, he couldn't hold his own back.

"These sound great," you told him, glancing at the books again. "I love mysteries, this is..." you met his eyes briefly before shyly looking back down. "This is so thoughtful of you, Joel. Thank you."

He beamed with pride, thrilled that he was able to do something nice for you. "You're welcome, ba- ahem," he coughed, stopping himself from finishing his sentence. You looked back up at him, heat creeping up both of your necks. He cleared his throat and turned around, picking up your plates. "You're welcome," he said again, "thought you might be gettin' bored 'round here."

He rinsed the plates in the sink before heading towards the front door. You put your two books on the counter and trailed after him, the both of you sliding on your boots and jackets. Joel grabbed his backpack before opening the door for you and he followed you down the porch steps.

"Yeah, I'm definitely getting a little bored," you said, eyeing him up as you walked side by side towards the stables. "But speaking of that, I was talking to Maria yesterday and she suggested I get a job." His head swiveled over to you, lips parted in surprise, but before he could speak, you continued. "She said I can pick whatever I want, nothing too strenuous."

He nodded and looked straight ahead again, your words rolling around in his head. "Yeah, suppose that makes sense."

"Good," you said, pleased he was open to the idea. "So when I was at the infirmary yesterday, Nick mentioned-"

"Why were you at the infirmary? Were you in pain? Did you get hurt?"

"Joel, I was fine," you said with a huff. You pointed to the back of your head. "I had my stitches removed."

He stopped in his tracks, which made you skid to a halt. His arms reached out to lift up your hair but at the last second, he held back.

"Can I?" he asked over your shoulder, and you nodded. He gingerly lifted up your hair to take a look at your injury, which felt much better now that the stitches were gone.

"Made showering so much easier," you told him. He hummed and dropped your hair.

"Looks good," he said, and continued walking. "You shoulda waited, I woulda went with you," he added.

"It took ten minutes," you said, waving him off as the stables came into view. "But while I was there, Nick mentioned his aide got reassigned to patrol to fill my old position, so I offered to take her place."

"You wanna work at the infirmary?" he asked, and you shrugged.

"I don't know much, but he said I didn't need to. He just needs help around the office. Cleaning up, taking inventory, maybe help him with some minor procedures. Hand him tools and all that," you said, and Joel nodded slowly.

"Alright," he said, "if that's what you wanna do, sure."

And although you weren't asking for his permission, it felt like you got it, anyway.

As you got closer to the stables, the high pitched whinny of a horse in a nearby paddock caught both your attention. The horse looked smaller - younger - and was attached to a long rope, and in the center of the field holding the other end was a man around Joel's age. Even from a distance, you could see the clench in his jaw and the way his muscles strained to rein in the animal, but he was losing the fight. The horse was too young and too strong and kept pulling away, getting as far away from the man as possible before the lead went taught and the horse was forced to face the man again. Each time it happened, the horse let out a shrill whinny and stomped its hooves in the dirt, expressing its displeasure.

"That's Caleb," Joel said as you both paused to watch. "Must be breakin' in a yearling."

"Breaking in?" you asked, your eyes still glued to the horse, whose head was twisting around angrily, trying to break free.

"It means he's tryin' to tame her so we can ride her," he explained, and you nodded. You both leaned up against the fence and watched the beautiful animal rear up and then dig its hooves deeper into the dirt, dust kicking up into a cloud around them. Caleb was struggling. Sweat was dripping down his face as he tugged on the lead and shouted commands at the horse, but she was having none of it.

The horse's whinnies were becoming louder and more panicked. The whites of her eyes showed when Caleb attempted to get closer, his skin tight over his knuckles from holding onto the rope. Once Caleb got close enough, the horse swung its massive head around in the air then reared back again with all its might, pulling Caleb off his feet unexpectedly with a shout.

"Shit," Joel muttered. He gripped the top rail of the fence and hauled himself over before you could even process what was happening. You watched, eyes wide, as Joel ran into the middle of the field, his arms raised up high over his head to keep the horse from stomping on Caleb.

"Hey! Hey!" you heard Joel's booming voice shout at the animal, drawing her attention off Caleb. The horse charged at Joel, but swerved away at the last second. Joel turned around and gave Caleb a hand, dragging him to his feet before the horse made its way back to where they stood.

"Hey," Joel said, softer this time, but his arms still stretched out in front of him. The horse skidded to a stop a few feet away, snorting and pawing at the dirt, its long tail flicking back and forth. Caleb stood and dusted himself off before taking a few steps backwards to catch his breath, but Joel remained in the same spot. He stared down the animal, the two of them silently sizing the other up. Joel's voice rang out again, just as soft as before. "Hey, shh, girl," he said, relaxing his stance a bit.

You stood cemented to the ground, entranced, as you watched the stand off between man and beast. Joel didn't look scared. He barely even flinched when the horse let out another high pitched squeal. He stood tall and firm, refusing to back down, and patiently waited for the horse to come to him.

He left his arm outstretched as an olive branch, his eyes never leaving the horse. He murmured low, soothing noises until it took a tentative step forward. Joel nodded encouragingly and continued to speak softly, earning him another step.

You felt a stirring low in your stomach as you continued to watch, with your jaw slack and your breaths shallow. Joel finally reached out and grabbed the lead, then ran the flat of his hand slowly up and down the horse's nose, giving it a little scratch between the eyes, and you clenched your thighs together.

After a few minutes of Joel calmingly murmuring to the horse, he handed the rope back to Caleb, who expressed his deepest gratitude before carefully leading the filly back towards the stables. Joel turned back towards you, dusting his hands off as he walked. Your cheeks felt warm by the time he made it to the other side of the fence and climbed over.

"That was..." you trailed off, not sure what to say. He smirked at you as he leaned down to pick his backpack up. "That was really impressive," you finally squeaked out. Unbeknownst to you, he could see right through you. He'd known you for too long and he especially knew what you looked like when you were aroused. He eyed you up and down before nodding towards the stables.

"It's 'bout respect and patience. You get what you give," he explained as he wiped away some sweat that formed on the back of his neck. Your mouth went dry at the sight.

"H-have you done that before?"

"What, break in wild animals?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow at you, and you nodded. If he didn't already clock the way you were reacting, he wouldn't have said what he said next. "No. Only you."

You choked on your laughter and he grinned.

"I hardly think I can compare to a wild horse," you said, your cheeks on fire.

"You're right. Tamin' you was harder."

"I thought I was the one who confronted you about sneaking around? Which is it?" you teased as you followed him into the barn, the scent of hay and leather and the sound of horses gently snorting in their stalls invading your senses.

"Oh, you did. You just didn't like sneakin' 'round. Took a lot longer to make you fall in love and move in with me," he said. He walked up to a list pinned to a clipboard and scribbled his name inside an empty slot.

"Mm, and you really think you can do it again?" you asked, trying to sound doubtful but your smile gave you away. He glanced down at you, leaning against the wall for a moment, his eyes lingering on your lips and cheeks before chuckling.

"Oh, absolutely," he said lowly, and you felt your heart flutter in your chest.

"Alright, Casanova. Let's get a move on," you said, rolling your eyes and turning away, but not before he caught the excited glint in your eye.

Thank god for Joel's backpack.

That was the only thing separating you two as you clung to him from behind as he steered your borrowed horse through the woods. It was peaceful. Serene, even. It was hard to believe so many horrible things happened, and were still happening, in this world when you were surrounded by such beauty. And you might have been able to appreciate it more if you weren't so utterly distracted by your body's reaction to Joel. You couldn't imagine what you would be thinking and feeling if there wasn't a buffer between you. Had you been able to feel each and every strong muscle in his back and shoulders, or the heat rolling off him, or fully commit to memory his very unique and intoxicating scent.

No, luckily you had some distance, and by the time he reached the field he was looking for, you felt like you had regained your senses. You brushed off your earlier reaction to your hormones and nothing more by the time you slid down from the horse and joined Joel on the ground.

"It's so quiet out here," you remarked, looking around and shrugging off your jacket. By now, the sun had risen high enough in the sky to warm everything up around you, the frosty morning air long since melted away. Joel tied the reins of your horse around a tree trunk and took off his own jacket, slinging it over the saddle.

"We used to come out here a lot," was all he said, avoiding your eyes. You looked around again, trying to find something familiar. He could tell what you were doing and he shook his head.

"Don't try to force it, it ain't gonna do any good," he said, and you looked over at him, surprised.

"Sorry. I'm really trying," you said softly, looking down at the dirt. He looked at you sadly, just for a moment when your attention was on your shoes, then forced a smile across his face.

"C'mon, I wanna show you somethin'."

You followed him through the thinning trees towards the open field; the grass waist high as you hiked through it together, cicadas singing all around you as you walked. The sun was growing more powerful, but you weren't uncomfortable.

"This is my favorite time of year," you told him, and he glanced over at you. "It's not too hot, not too cold."

He smiled and looked straight ahead once again. "I know. You like warm days and cold nights."

"That's right," you said, pressing your lips together and wondering if there would ever be anything you could tell him that he didn't already seem to know. "You have a good memory."

"When it comes to you, yeah."

Joel held out an arm to stop you, your face angled towards the ground as you walked so you wouldn't trip. You looked up when you ran into his arm, first at him, and then at the scenery before you.

It was breathtaking. Somehow, without even realizing it, you were on top of a mountain. Or, close to it, anyway. Near the edge, you looked around and saw other hills and valleys surrounding you, green and lush and full of life. A flock of blackbirds swooped by straight ahead, and way down below, between all the jagged rocks, was a little lazy river.

"This is beautiful," you breathed, your eyes glistening. Joel studied your face while you were distracted, his eyes never once looking at the nature surrounding you.

"Yeah, I know," he whispered. You dragged your eyes away from the view and gave him a dazzling smile, one that made his chest ache, before sitting down at the edge of the grass with a sigh.

"Okay. What do you miss most about your life before?" you asked him out of the blue. His stomach lurched, his mind immediately filled with thoughts of a little girl with curly hair and dark brown eyes that once made him finally understand the true meaning of unconditional love.

"Barbeques," he choked out, hoping you didn't pick up on his mood shift.

"Mm, that's a good one," you said dreamily, still staring out over the edge of the cliff. "What was your favorite part?"

He felt himself relax a bit as you forced his mind to shift gears. "The music. The food. Just... lazy weekends, hangin' out with friends or family. Spendin' time with people I cared 'bout."

"What's your favorite barbeque food?" you asked, pulling your knees up to your chest and turning your head towards him.

He thought about it for a moment, his daughter's memory drifting back into the recesses of his mind. "Ribs. Or maybe burgers. Tough call," he said with a chuckle. You slapped the side of your leg and turned your whole body towards him excitedly.

"Oh, my god. Speaking of ribs. My brother - Matty - one time he was in an 'all you can eat' ribs competition," you said, a grin already pulling at the corners of your mouth. "He was like, 22 at the time and he could really pack food away. Like, really eat. It scared the shit outta my mom, she had no idea how he did it and still stayed so trim," you said, and Joel chuckled. "Anyway, he entered this contest and all of the other contestants were these, like, huge guys. I'm talking pushing 300 pounds huge, right?" you said, the excitement evident in your voice now as your eyes shone bright, making Joel smile even more. "So, anyway, one by one these guys are dropping like flies and my brother just kept mowing down all these ribs like it was nothing. It was down to him and one other guy and the other guy looked like he was about to tap out. The prize was like, a thousand bucks, and we were all getting so damn excited. He was gonna win!" you said, your voice getting louder the more excited you became. Seeing you that happy for the first time in weeks made Joel's heart feel like it was going to burst, so he played along and urged you on. "Then, Matty freezes. And I'm staring at him. And he's just staring down at his hands, and we're all like 'what the hell is he doing?' and suddenly - woosh!" you said with a giggle, using your arms for emphasis. "He pukes everywhere! It was so fucking much, Joel! And it was so disgusting, oh my god. People were running from their seats and dry heaving, and me and my parents are fucking dying with laughter," you said, your giggles growing louder the more you remembered. You wiped a stray tear from the corner of your eye as you continued. "Anyway, of course he got disqualified and he never could be in the same room as a rack of ribs ever again," you finished, flashing him a grin. But when you saw his expression, although he was smiling and giving you some obligatory laughs, you could tell it wasn't the first time he had heard that story.

"You knew that already, didn't you?" you asked, narrowing your eyes at him. He smirked and looked down at his hands.

"Yeah," he admitted, and you groaned. "But it's still a real funny story. I love the way you tell it."

"I wonder if there's anything I didn't tell you," you said with a sigh. He inched a little closer when he heard the despair in your voice.

"It doesn't matter. I love hearin' everythin' 'bout you," he said, and you gave him a little smile. "You could tell me a hundred times and I wouldn't care."

He kept saying that word. Love. Over and over, like it was nothing. You looked away, his eye contact too intense all of the sudden, and stared out at the beauty before you. But you could still feel the heat of his gaze on your skin. It sent a shiver down your spine. Your mind raced, trying to think of something else to say when he softly whispered your name. You tilted your head in his direction and the look in his eye caused you to temporarily forget how to breathe. He was staring at you like you were the only other person in the world. Like you were a siren, calling to him on the sea, or Aphrodite, knocking him to his knees in prayer.

No, no, no, you thought as he leaned in a fraction, his eyes flicking down to your lips. Too soon. Not ready.

A blood curdling screech echoed from somewhere behind you. Somewhere far too close for comfort. You froze, eyes wide and scared, but Joel whipped around and reached into his backpack, pulling out his revolver and knife.

Stay here, he mouthed, pressing a finger to his lips, and you couldn't remember if you acknowledged him or not before he crouched and disappeared into the long grass, leaving you all alone on the edge of a very dangerous cliff with some terrifying monster nearby. Slowly, trying very hard not to make a sound, you turned your head, searching for the source of the noise. As you scanned the field, the tall grass hiding Joel somewhere in its depths, you spotted it. It, being the only proper word.

It was hideous. Fucking disgusting. Half its face was overgrown with fungus plates, its mouth wide and wet and dribbling with blood, teeth yellowed and bared. It hunched over as it got closer and closer to you, snapping its jaw like a lion, trying to locate its next meal. You swallowed roughly as it got closer, its torn clothes and bent fingers coming into view. And the smell. The stench of death and rot filled the air, completely ruining the beautiful backdrop you were admiring mere minutes ago. Your heart slammed wildly in your chest, your breathing unsteady and your hands shook violently. You had nothing to defend yourself. You looked to your side, wondering if you could push it over the cliff if necessary. Where was Joel?!

Just as it was about to clear the grass and step into the clearing, Joel leapt up behind the creature and stabbed it in the back of the head with a loud grunt. It collapsed in an instant, blood spilling from its skull as Joel stood over the corpse, shoulders and chest heaving as he fought to catch his breath.

"Oh my god," you whispered, your trembling hands coming up to cover your mouth as you stared at the lifeless body. You hadn't seen an infected alive yet. And they were far more terrifying than you ever imagined. Tears welled up in your eyes that you quickly tried to flick away, but Joel already noticed.

"You okay?" he asked, his eyebrows furrowed with worry as he cleaned his knife off in the grass.

"Yeah," you replied shakily, still staring at the dead infected a few feet away. You slowly forced yourself to your feet and walked around it, only stopping when you were safely in the grass. With a grunt, Joel kicked the body closer and closer to the edge until it tumbled over. You winced as you heard its body faintly thudding and cracking against the rocks and branches below. He glanced over at you, your face screwed up with a mix of distaste and fear, and he sighed.

"Wanna just head back?"

"Yeah," you said, looking at the view once more before following him through the tall grass. "It was nice while it lasted, though."

The two of you trudged through the grass quietly, back towards the woods. He could tell you were shaken up and he inwardly cursed the clicker for ruining what could have ended up being a really nice day with you. A day where he thought he was making some progress. He made you smile and laugh and he definitely recognized that heated look in your eye back at the stables, but all of those memories suddenly seemed so distant. It wasn't until the horse came into view that he even remembered why he brought you out in the first place.

"You still wanna learn to ride?"

You looked up at him, your perfect lips parted ever so slightly. It made him want to grab your chin and press his mouth against yours so he could remember what you felt like again.

"Oh, sure," you said, glancing wearily over at the horse as you approached.

"Why don't you take the reins and I'll sit behind you," he offered as he untied the horse from the tree. "That way I can take over if you're feelin' too nervous."

"Okay..." you agreed slowly, realizing that meant he would be pressed up against you for the entire ride home. And this time, there wouldn't be a buffer.

He laced his fingers together and bent forward, offering you a boost. You got a good grip on the saddle and delicately placed your foot in his hands before he launched you upwards. You swung your leg over and shifted in the saddle a bit, looking down at the back of the horse's head. Its long ears flickered back and forth, trying to shoo away the flies.

You gasped when the saddle shifted slightly and Joel climbed up behind you. Your body stiffened and you stared straight ahead as he got himself comfortable. You tried to block it out, but when his arms wrapped around you from behind and took the reins from your grasp, you realized it would be impossible.

"This is how you wanna hold 'em, see?" he murmured softly in your ear, and you immediately felt goosebumps break out up and down your arms. He hadn't been this close before. Not even when he was examining your head wound. His exhale tickled the side of your neck and you realized his lips were dangerously close to your exposed skin. When it occurred to you that he had asked you a question, you blinked and snapped out of it.

"Yeah," you said, and you hoped he would think your hands were shaking because you were nervous to ride and nothing more.

"Now we're ridin' western, so when you steer, you wanna pull the reins across, like this," he said, demonstrating with his hands over yours, and just like that, the horse turned to the left. "And you just do the opposite if you wanna go the other way."

"Okay, makes sense," you replied, surprised you were actually following along.

"You want the horse to move, you gotta squeeze your legs. Gotta do it hard, though. It's a big animal, they can't feel you if you don't squeeze hard."

"Uh huh," you said, so you gave it a try. You squeezed your legs as hard as you could and the horse slowly lumbered forwards, and you squealed with excitement. "I did it!"

Joel chuckled behind you. You could feel the deep rumble through your back and the little puffs of air from his nose on your neck. It made you shudder, and you tried to pass it off like you were cold. The horse began to slowly walk back the way you came, through the trees and past a little stream, and the longer you walked, the more confident you became.

"This isn't so bad," you admitted, and you weren't sure if you were talking about Joel's embrace or riding the horse. You were growing used to his arms around you now, even though you didn't really need his hands to guide yours, you didn't say anything. It was... nice.

"How do I make it go faster?" you asked.

"Well, you can give her a little kick, or you can click your tongue. You remember how to click your tongue?"

You laughed a little and without thinking, you gave it a try. Clicking your tongue experimentally against your teeth sent the horse rushing forward. Just into a trot, but it still took you off guard. You gasped and leaned back into Joel's chest, looking to steady yourself so you wouldn't fall. You could feel him laughing behind you as he tightened his arms around your waist and gave the reins a gentle tug, slowing the horse back down to a walk.

"Not funny!" you exclaimed, but your smile gave you away.

He missed this. He really missed this. He missed holding you and laughing with you and spending time with you. What he wouldn't give to kiss you again. He ached for the way you tasted, the way you moaned underneath him, the feeling of your smooth skin under his rough palms. Every day that passed he felt like he was forgetting little by little, and the urge to remind himself, the urge to pull you into his arms and kiss you deeply and take you to bed with him was becoming more intense by the day.

But he had to be patient. He could be patient. You'd come around, one day. He was sure of it.

By the time you made it back to Jackson, you were feeling much more at ease. Maybe this is what you needed. Some time away with Joel, just the two of you, so you could learn more about him. You had to admit, you were beginning to see a very soft and sweet side to him that you only caught glimpses of in the past.

Before today, you hadn't been able to understand the attraction. He was good looking, you already knew that, but you also knew that couldn't have just been it. That wasn't enough to share a love for one another that he classified as rare and meant to be. Now, it was starting to become clearer. There was something inherently sexy about the way he handled himself. The confidence he had, which, at first, came off as cocky, you now viewed in a different light. After the way he handled the horse in the pasture and the clicker in the field, you were beginning to understand.

Joel Miller was a protector. He cared deeply and passionately for the ones he loved, and he stopped at nothing to defend them. Sometimes that love was misplaced as anger, and that's where he kept losing you.

He had asked if you felt up to joining Tommy and Maria at the dining hall for dinner, and even though you were a little tired from your outing, you agreed.

As you walked down the street together, he had to fight the impulse to hold your hand. He still noticed the way people looked at you, their curiosity over your now famous injury getting the best of them, but once they caught his eye they quickly averted their gaze. It angered him, he couldn't help it. He didn't want you to feel uncomfortable. You didn't deserve to be gawked at.

You followed Joel through the crowded hall once again, and just like before, the crowd naturally parted for him. He seemed to be making his way towards the back, towards the same table as before, only this time Tommy and Maria were already seated and waiting.

Maria greeted you with a hug and you gave Tommy a quick smile across the table before sitting down between her and Joel.

"Beautiful day out today," Maria said off to the side while Joel and Tommy talked amongst themselves.

"Yeah, it really was. I'm gonna miss it when the snow comes," you said, giving her a face. "Who's watching your daughter?" you asked suddenly, glancing around as if you could have possibly missed a small child running around.

"Oh, Dina offered to babysit, so we jumped at the chance to get out of the house," she said with a laugh. "Did you do anything exciting today?"

"Yeah, actually," you said, glancing at Joel, who was still talking quietly to his brother. "Joel taught me how to ride a horse. Well... re-taught me, I guess," you said with a small laugh.

"Thats fantastic. I'm glad you were feeling well enough to go out," Maria said with a warm smile.

"Oh, that reminds me-" you said, stopping yourself when Seth came over to take your orders. You just asked for what Maria was getting and turned your attention back to her. "I thought of a job."

Her eyes widened in surprise and she clapped her hands together. "Let's hear it!"

"I thought I could help out at the infirmary," you said, and she nodded along thoughtfully. "Nick was telling me his aide had to join patrol and he says he just needs someone to help do things around the office."

"That sounds like a great idea," she said, but you could hear the hesitation in her voice. When she glanced over at Joel, you connected the dots and sighed.

"He's fine with it," you grumbled, your gaze dropping to your hands.

"Fine with what?" Joel's voice asked from beside you.

"She wants to help out at the infirmary," Maria said, and Tommy grinned.

"Great idea, sugar," he said, "Nick could use the help. He's smart, but he's disorganized as all hell."

"I think it'll be good for you," Joel said, his knee knocking against yours under the table. "Help you get to know everyone a little better. Besides, if anythin' were to happen, you're in the right place," he added, leaning back in his chair so Seth could put his plate down in front of him.

"What do you mean?" you asked, picking up your fork and then scrunching your nose when you saw cherry tomatoes on your plate. Without even looking up, Joel speared the tomatoes with his fork and put them on his plate, then the three of you watched as he gathered his squash and gave it to you.

"I mean, if your head ever got to hurtin' again, then you'd be in the right place," he explained, looking up and licking the pad of his thumb. He frowned a bit when he noticed the table staring at him, and Tommy and Maria quickly ducked their heads to focus on their food, hiding their smiles.

"What?"

You dropped your gaze shyly to your plate and poked at the squash with your fork. "You know I hate tomatoes."

Heat crept up his neck a bit but he grinned. "The acid upsets your stomach," he said, and you chuckled to yourself, about to say something else when Jesse happened to walk by your table with some friends.

"Hey, Jesse!" Tommy called out, making him stop. He gave you all a quick wave before looking at Tommy expectantly. "Think you can join in on the 10am patrol tomorrow? Joel was just tellin' me he saw a clicker in that zone. Don't want any surprises like last time."

"Yeah, of course," Jesse said, then Joel frowned.

"Speakin' of last time," Joel said, his eyes drifting back and forth between the two men. "You never did explain how she got hurt on your patrol."

"That's right," you said, setting down your fork, "what happened? How did I fall? Was it the horse?"

Tommy and Jesse exchanged a nervous look. It was quick, but Joel still caught it. His jaw ticked to the side as he patiently waited for an answer.

"Uh, it was all so fast, and so much was happenin'," Tommy said, clearly floundering.

"Yeah, it's kinda hard to remember exactly," Jesse said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Well, try," Joel said, his voice dropping an octave. You turned your head slightly to look at him, not understanding why there was a sudden mood shift.

"We got ambushed by a small hoard," Tommy began, pushing his food around on his plate. "Thought we had it handled til a bunch more came outta nowhere," he continued, looking up to meet your eye now. "You were takin' down a runner, didn't see one comin' up behind you and it pushed you down. Knocked your head on a sharp boulder. Jesse 'n me took down the rest of 'em and that's when we realized you were knocked out cold."

You nodded, the story making sense as you remembered waking up to them yelling your name and their clothes covered in blood. But Joel wasn't satisfied. He knew they were leaving something out.

"That all?" he pressed, eyeing his brother. Tommy looked at Joel, a tense moment passing between the two before Tommy slowly nodded. He was about to open his mouth to speak when Jesse interrupted.

"It was my fault."

The whole table turned to look at him, taken aback. His hands were fidgeting at his sides as he avoided Joel's intense stare, trying to look anywhere but at him.

"I wanted to check out this department store. It was too big, we hadn't cleared the area, b-but we hadn't seen any infected in weeks a-and I thought we were good," he said, glancing up quickly at Joel, who was clenching his jaw and glaring at Jesse.

"What'd you need so bad from this store?" Joel seethed, and you saw Jesse swallow nervously.

"I-it's me and Grace's anniversary soon, wanted to get her something-"

Joel stood up quickly, his chair tumbling backwards, clattering loudly on the ground and silencing the room.

"So you wanted to get your girlfriend a present? That's why she can't remember a goddamn thing?" Joel roared, pointing at you. Tommy stood up and held his hands out.

"Calm down, Joel."

"I ain't calmin' down!" he shouted, and you jumped in your chair, scooting away from him and closer to Maria, who put an arm around you and urged you to stand.

"Let's go to the bar," she murmured, ushering you away as if she knew what was coming.

"I-I'm so sorry, Joel," Jesse stammered, tripping over his feet as he tried to put some distance between them.

"Sorry ain't gonna bring her back," he growled, rounding the table, his shoulders tight and his eyes wild. He reached out and grabbed Jesse by the collar before Tommy could react, and slammed him face first into the table. Food and cutlery went everywhere. People at nearby tables backed away but stayed to watch the fight unfold. Joel lifted Jesse up and smashed his face into the table again with a grunt, and this time you heard Jesse cry out in pain. You covered your mouth in horror as you watched Tommy try to pry Joel's hands off of him. "Wonder how many hits it'll take before you forget Grace. Maybe then we'll be even!" he shouted, pulling him back up by the collar. By now, blood poured from Jesse's mouth and his cheeks, mixing with tears as he tried to pull Joel's hands away. Just as Joel was about to slam his head into the table for a third time, you found your voice.

"Stop!!" you screamed, and by some miracle, he did. He still gripped Jesse's shirt in his hands, but Joel twisted his head around to look at you. Whatever he in your face made his fingers loosen their grip and Jesse stumbled backwards, collapsing into a chair as Tommy kneeled down next to him, trying to wipe away the blood.

Joel turned his whole body toward you, his face red and his chest heaving. His eyes were still crazed with anger but you could see it slowly melting away.

He took a step forward and you took a step back.

His eyes dropped to your feet, regret washing over him in an instant.

"Maria, can you gimme a hand?" Tommy called out, and she rushed over to help Jesse stand. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw them slowly leading Jesse towards the front door, no doubt in search of the doctor to help patch his wounds, but your eyes remained locked on Joel.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, not caring about all the onlookers still frozen in silence. But you did. You opened your mouth, then glanced around and thought better of it.

"Not here," you said under your breath, then stalked towards the exit, pushing your way past people until you felt the cool night air in your lungs.

You hurried down the street, wrapping your arms around yourself as you barreled home. You didn't turn around to see if he was following you. You knew he was. It was almost like you could feel him now. His presence draped around you like a scarf, surrounding you, engulfing you, suffocating you.

Storming up the porch steps, you flung the door open and walked inside, not bothering to close it behind you. You charged into the kitchen and paced around, your anger boiling inside you with nowhere for it to go.

"I'm sorry," he tried again from the doorway, trying to give you space. You stopped in your tracks and looked at him. His eyebrows were pinched together as he quietly waited for you to say something.

"Have you always been like this?"

His breath caught in his throat and he paused for a moment before replying. "Since we met? Yes."

"So you're saying I've caused you to act like a caveman when you hear something you don't like?" you shot back, crossing your arms defiantly.

"No, no, that's not - what I meant was, since you've known me, I've... had a temper," he said, quickly correcting himself.

You let a silent moment pass between you as you thought about what he said.

"It's no wonder it took me so long to fall in love with you," you said, and he winced. He looked away, trying to hide the pain, and you couldn't help but feel a little bad, but you stood your ground.

"It didn't bother you before," he mumbled, looking at the ground.

"Well, it bothers me now," you snapped, and he nodded.

"Okay, then I'll work on it," he conceded, looking up at you. "Happy?"

You snorted and rolled your eyes. "Thrilled."

Brushing past him, you marched up the stairs towards your bedroom and slammed the door shut behind you.

You could hear him moving around downstairs as you washed up and changed into pajamas, still seething at his behavior. How could you possibly fall in love with this man? You could barely figure out who he was - one minute he was soft and sweet, and the next he was bashing people's faces in. Even you could see it wasn't really Jesse's fault. The three of you would have agreed to check out the store together. Joel was just looking for someone to blame. It was immature and brutish and stupid.

Just as you pulled the covers over yourself, you heard a quiet rap on the door. You paused for a moment before rolling your eyes.

"Come in."

The door slowly creaked open and Joel slipped inside your room, glancing around at the bedroom you once shared together before looking at you.

"Can we talk?"

You furrowed your brow for a second before nodding, and he breathed a sigh of relief. He stepped forward and perched on the side of the bed, facing the wall so you could only see his side profile as he sat, deep in thought. You pulled your legs up so your chin rested on your knees and waited.

"I lied to you."

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise and you couldn't help but think of the journal - Joel lied to me - and wondered if this was it. If you were going to get your answer.

"When you asked me what I missed most 'bout... before. I lied."

Okay, so probably not the lie in the journal, but still, your interest was piqued.

"What do you miss most?" you finally asked, and he sucked in a deep breath, his eyes glistening as he stared at the wall.

"My daughter. Sarah."

Your heart clenched in your chest and your gaze dropped to your hands. A daughter?

A long silence passed as you slowly connected the dots. The way he was with Ellie. The anger. The journal entry about Tommy having a daughter. The softness he kept hidden away.

"She died on outbreak day," he began, his throat already constricting. "Died in my arms. She was shot and-" he sniffled and took a deep breath. "And I couldn't save her. I held her and watched the light leave her eyes and I -" he choked back a sob and looked down, still avoiding your gaze. "I've never been the same," he finally managed to get out.

You swallowed back the tears that were forming. How couldn't you see? Of course he was hurting. Of course he lost someone. Just like you lost your family, he lost his. Were you that selfish and blind that you couldn't see it?

"Joel, I'm so sorry," you said shakily, but he shook his head.

"Just wanted to explain why I'm... whatever," he replied, giving up and rubbing his face.

Your chest ached for him. He was in pain and you couldn't stand it. Inching forward, you wrapped your arms around his neck, tentatively resting the side of your head on his shoulder. His hand came up to cup your elbow and he tilted his head so it rested against yours.

"I'm sorry," you repeated softly.

"Me, too."

You stayed like that for a while. Extending small olive branches to each other as you sat with the weight of what the world did to you both, and you finally began to understand what might have brought you together in the first place.

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[sugoi-writes]

Hi, i have a proposition for you...

Alastor catching himself bleating whenever reader touches him 👀

(i just find it so adorable when he squeaks like a little fawn when Rosie pulls him in that one scene and the theory that he does that only when he's happy and with a person he feels comfortable with)

Gdhdhd I had discovered this a while back, and the idea THRILLS me. To no fucking end! I hope this is okay and worth the wait! (Two Fics in one week? HUH?)

No warnings for this one! Just cute cute fluff (I'm doing my best! ;w; gdhdhdhd)

A Bleating Heart - Alastor x GN! Reader

You were reading your book in Alastor's armchair, taking in the heat that radiated from the mint green flames of the fireplace. When you heard a groan to your rear, you paused. You looked behind you, only to see Alastor tossing and turning onto his side. You couldn't help your frown, watching as Alastor's brows furrowed. The Radio Demon was frustrated, his cheek smashed into his pillow aggressively. 

"...everything alright, dear?" You ask softly, recalling that he was 'laying down' to get rid of his headache. Though you knew that Alastor wasn't one for sleep, you kept quiet and content all the same. But when he shook his head, pointing directly to it, you understood perfectly. 

" 'Antlers still bothering you, huh...? Headache?" 

Alastor hummed lowly, turning over and laying face down into his bed. While he was muffled by a pillow, you could barely make out what he said:

" I loathe shedding... It hasn't even begun, and-- oh, they itch-- to no end..." 

"And I assume that doesn't help your headache either?" 

Alastor grumbled, unable to be upset at your gentle pestering. You doted on him like his mother, a quality he would never admit to loving about you," ...Not a lick, dear..." 

You innocently stand from the armchair, walking over to Alastor's bedside," Would... Would it helped if you laid your head in my lap?" 

Alastor raises his head up slightly, eyes narrowed," I hardly see how that could help in this predicament..." You sigh, gently rolling Alastor over onto his back before sitting in the space he used to occupy. Begrudgingly, he did not stop you, but his eyes followed you cautiously. 

"Just trust me... Okay?" 

Alastor's expression soured. Trust is a hard-earned thing to receive from him. The Radio Demon, in all his glory, was slow to make acquaintances, and slower to give out trust. But, he relented, allowing you to sit beside him comfortably. When you patted your lap expectantly, Alastor complied. Due to his antlers, he awkwardly laid sideways on his bed, knees rising and coming together as his head finally met your lap. Thankfully, you would not be disemboweled by his accursed antlers tonight. 

When you smiled down to him, Alastor simply closed his eyes, unable to look your way without feeling embarrassed. This was well outside of his comfort zone. He was feeling incredibly vulnerable while his body did everything to antagonize him. He felt like he was between a rock and a hard place, despite your plush thighs cradling his head.

However, when he felt your hand brush against his hair, scratching gently, his throat ran dry. All nerves and stiffeness became lesser; like the rest of his senses, they became dulled. 

The touch was... Foreign, soft... But not unwelcome. It was soothing, even. When you continued to touch, your hands working in subtle circles against his scalp, he couldn't help the quiet, pleased hum that left him. 

" 'Feels good, my buck?" 

Alastor cracked one eye open, his smile wavering,"...please don't make me say it out loud," Alastor said quietly, a chuckle rising in his throat. You shrugged, not minding his shyness. 

"Hmm, it would be so much cuter if you did, though~" 

When your hand moved to an antler, scratching gently at the base, a full-body tremor ran through his neck down to his hooves. His knees knocked together, a quiet, animalistic noise tumbling out of him. You blink a few times, surprised by the noise, and decided to repeat the action. When a meek, content bleat hit your ears, your eyes nearly doubled in size. You were beaming down at Alastor, a large, giddy inhale expanding your chest. Your heart throbbed at the subconscious gesture. 

Meanwhile, Alastor's eyes were slammed shut, much tighter than before. His heart was racing with anxiety, his palms suddenly feeling clammy. 

Why. Why now, of all times, could he not keep his pathetic little ticks at bay? Of course he found comfort in your company, but-- 

...Maybe he should have used his words, after all. 

"Alastor, was that...?" 

"If you value your life, you will never speak of this again." 

You throw your free hand up defensively, a coy smile on your face," Oh sure, sure... Of course. Whatever you say, Alastor." When a second hand joined the other, lightly scratching at the base of his other antler, that small, high pitched bleat bounced right out of him. 

"Mmm... Yes... Yes, not a word, mon ange... Not a single word... but this-- this is fine for now..." 

You chuckle, increasing the pressure you applied as Alastor melted into your touch. 

"If you continue to be this adorable, I would never speak again, if it meant you stayed like this forever~" Alastor's hands folded together, laying on his chest. Soon enough his knees fell apart, creating a wide 'v'. He looks to you with both eyes as his brow twitches. 

"And what fun would that be? I rather enjoy our conversations, cher." You nearly snorted, surprised that Alastor didn't realize you were joking. 

You laugh, your shoulders shaking with an effort to be quiet as Alastor's legs finally gave out, hanging lazily off of the bed. When your hands moved higher up his antlers, you noticed his legs swinging back and forth idly. You wondered if he noticed, or if this was yet another subconscious action. 

" Fine, fine... I promise to keep talking~ but only if I get to keep spoiling you like this." 

Alastor feels his heart squeeze at the notion, a warmth spreading across his cheeks and ears. He refused to confirm or deny your request with words, instead shimmying his shoulders to sink further into your lap. An open-mouthed sigh was your only response as you lightly dragged your nails across one of his points, his hands untangling from one another. His body almost felt like liquefied, completely and utterly relaxed, taking up an obnoxious amount of space on his bed. And for once, he allowed himself a moment to enjoy it while in someone else's presence. 

He felt safe... Immensely so. But he would never profess to that to you so soon. 

For now, he was content with you playing with his hair, scratching his irritable antlers while he listened to you speak. Quite frankly, it wouldn't take long for Alastor's mind to shut down, his body losing the fight to slumber. When you noticed his breathing toggle to a steady, silent repetition, you resigned yourself to being a pillow. If you were honest, you would sooner die again than move from that spot. You would only permit that once Alastor woke up again, head clear and eyes soft... You wondered how he would look waking up, the adorable thought alone making you feel a surge of glee.

You didn't mind the sensation of pins and needles settling in your legs, knowing that this was a rare moment. Why interrupt something so fleeting? So precious?

You couldn't help but watch as Alastor laid in your lap, unmoving and completely slack. You decided you wouldn't tell him about how he lost his smile while he slept. In the rarest of moments, his lips were agape, formed into a flat, horizontal line. You'd tuck that secret into the back of your mind for safe keeping... A fond memory you'd hang on to for the rest of your afterlife. (A secret almost as precious as his quiet snores, which started when you played with his hair again.) You almost squeaked when Alastor bleated again, much softer than when he was awake. Yes, it would be best if you never mentioned it... Alastor would die from sheer embarrassment alone, you think.

You let out a tired yawn, your mind wandering. Honestly? If you were really, truly in Hell... Well, this was a pretty splendid way to spend it, wasn't it? Why seek forgiveness and redemption, when your entire world was in your lap? And with that thought in mind, you decided to get some sleep, your head resting against the cool wood of Alastor's headboard. 

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Broken Mind | Josh Washington x Reader

......

Another day, another Until Dawn rewrite by yours truly <3

I've got Rami Malek on the brain again so I decided to revise this old 2016 fic I wrote about Josh being accompanied by Reader in the shed (after his prank reveal). Changed a few things around and added stuff from the prologue, but all in all the plot's the same (except they're together)

Anyways enjoy!

......

"Hey, [y/n]. Got a special delivery for you."

Hearing the quiet giggles of the Washington sisters, you looked up from your phone and smiled upon seeing your boyfriend being held up by the two of them.

He looked plastered as hell and half-asleep, but his eyes were slightly open. The moment they landed on you, lopsided grin spread across his lips.

"[Y/n]...baby...?"

"Yes. It's me, Josh." With a chuckle, you put down your phone and assisted the girls in helping him lay on the sofa. You decided to let him rest on top of you, seeing as he already had his arms wrapped around your torso. "Jeez, so clingy, huh? How much did you drink?"

"Mhm...I forgot.." His words were slurred.

"Of course you did." Putting your arms around him, you lightly scratched at his scalp with your fingertips, hearing his hums of content as he looked to his sisters.

While Hannah left, Beth smiled back and took a picture of him being all cuddly with you, reminding herself to send to you later. After that, she finally left you both alone.

"They take good care of you."

"Yeah..they're..the best." Josh mumbled tiredly into your chest, hugging you tighter. "But 'm glad you're here...thank you for being by my side. I love you sooooooooooo much."

"Of course, Joshie. I love you, too." You chuckled, holding him close until he dozed off again, before you ended up falling asleep yourself, enveloped by the warmth of the cabin fire and the one you loved most.

He probably won't remember much of this in the morning, but that was fine.

For once, everything felt right in the world.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"[Y/n], honey? Baby? Sweetheart?"

Blinking, you returned to the cold and cruel present, looking to the man tied to the post.

"Yes, Josh?" You sighed tiredly, wiping the blood from the corner of your lip.

"I'm pretty cold. How 'bout we loosen these restraints a little and-?"

"I'm sorry, but...I don't think that's a good idea right now."

"What? I....I can't believe it. You would let those jerks do this to me?!! Your boyfriend? After all I've done for you?!!" Angrily, Josh tugged at his restraints, gnashing his teeth at you like some animal. "I feel hurt. Who does this to someone they love?!"

"First of all, I didn't tie you up. And second...you're not the only one who's gotten hurt tonight."

"If anyone deserves to feel hurt, it should be me! After what they did to my sisters..they had it coming."

As much as you wanted to snap at him for acting this way, you knew that he wasn't well, and getting angry right back wasn't going to make anything better.

Instead, you opted to look outside the shed, observing the snowfall while trying to ignore the sounds of him whining and struggling with the ropes.

Such sights used to calm your nerves, but now...it was nothing more than a grim reminder of how long and unforgiving this night has been, and how there's still a few hours until sunlight and rescue arrived.

How did you get here?

Well, it was supposed to be a reunion between friends.

You and Josh were still together after the horrible tragedy that befell his sisters exactly one year prior, and you were with him through the long days he spent trying to isolate himself, and the difficult nights he spent wishing he didn't wake up at all.

You stayed with him no matter what.

No matter how many times he tried pushing you away...you always stayed. And while he didn't express it as much as he wanted to, he appreciated it.

That's the only reason why he didn't subject you to the "prank" he had laid out for the rest of the group.

You knew his passion for film projects, having helped him with some small YouTube ones yourself. You knew that this year, he wanted to do something to "really bring the gang back together", and you let him be when he insisted on working alone.

God, why didn't you press him on what exactly this prank entailed?

Why didn't you pick up the signs that he was off his meds?

What he enacted was horrific beyond measure--a prank that you didn't even think he was capable of carrying out.

One that seemed so real that you were almost convinced that you lost him to a murderer.

When Chris came to you sobbing in remorse over how the "Psycho" tricked him into killing your boyfriend, you didn't know what to feel. You wanted to see the body to confirm it, but given his and Ashley's reactions..it wasn't worth scarring your eyes or mind over.

It left you unbelievably sad and numb, although you were left confused when through his blubbering, he admitted that the saw blade was rigged to kill Josh despite choosing to save him.

That was the first sign that you knew something was off.

You didn't know anybody that held a massive grudge against him to the point of rigging a trap to murder him only.

But only after Josh revealed everything to Chris, Ashley, Sam, Mike, and you....that's when it all made sense.

And you felt betrayed.

You couldn't believe he'd orchestrate this whole scheme behind your back.

How could you have been so naive and trusting?

You felt like you should have known what he was up to. The others gave you suspicious looks and even Mike wondered for a moment if you were an accomplice...but you weren't.

That was the truth.

You had no idea.

Now all you felt was lingering guilt and festering anger that this was Josh's twisted idea of "revenge" against the people who didn't even kill his sisters. Against people like Chris who didn't even know what happened until he woke up.

And in a way, you felt like it was against you for not waking him up in time to stop the prank that led to Hannah and Beth running out of the cabin.

No matter how many times he claimed you had nothing to do with it, you felt like he was punishing you, too.

So now, you, Chris, and Mike have taken him away from the others, to a shed where he couldn't hurt anybody. Apparently Jess was dead, and despite his insistence that he didn't kill her....Mike didn't believe a word he said, having seen her body firsthand in some mining elevator.

Then when he started making lewd comments about Chris and Ashley, both of the men were growing agitated, debating on whether to make him shut up by force or not.

Finally, you intervened before they could decide, offering to watch over him until sunrise. You're the only one who had a small chance to talk some sense into him and make him realize his mistakes.

Mike was reluctant to leave you alone with him, thinking he'll guilt trip you into letting him go, but you convinced him and Chris you'll be fine.

There were some...scary things you've seen out in the woods earlier, and the last thing you wanna do is leave Josh alone with them nearby.

Even after all the shitty things he did, even after faking his own death...you still loved him.

You didn't believe he murdered Jess.

That's not what Josh would do.

"Your sisters wouldn't have wanted this." You quietly said, looking back at the wide-eyed man. "I wish things were different that night. I wish they didn't get humiliated. God, I wish Hannah had talked to me instead. But this...all of this was wrong, Josh. What happened doesn't justify-"

"But it worked, didn't it? Listen, I...I-I didn't want anyone dead." He stammered. "I just wanted to see that same terror on their faces. And I got them good! I got you all!!"

"...did you have to give Ash a black eye, though?"

"Look, she stabbed me with scissors! And it still hurts like a motherfucker."

You just gave him an expression that read "well I would have too if a killer was chasing me", and he seemed to understand...given how his shoulders slumped with defeat.

"Baby, 'm sorry..this...was not how our night's supposed to go. But you know what? I'm glad I was the only one laughing! Because NOW THEY KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE ON THE OTHER SIDE!!" Tears of anger pricked his eyes as his voice unexpectedly rose.

You whole body tensed, but you stayed calm, knowing he's only lashing out. "Josh, I know they hurt you. And hurting them back might feel good..but you hurt me too by faking your own death and not telling me how far you intended to take this prank."

"..you would've stopped me if I told you." He mumbled.

"Well maybe I should've been more persistent." You huffed. "If I was, we wouldn't be here. We wouldn't have to talk about why Jess died and why you seem to be the prime suspect-"

"I swear to god, it wasn't me! I don't even know where she is!" Josh snapped, before he curled up, like a child in timeout. "Mike..he wouldn't explain the wheres and whens. He just kept hitting me, pushing me..telling me to shut up...but I didn't do it...I swear. Please, please believe me, [y/n]. I'm sorry that you got roped into this. I-It's..the..the last thing I wanted.." His voice softened. "I'm sorry I've been bad..."

Slowly, you could see bits and pieces of the Josh you once knew coming back. His mind wasn't all there, of course, but you've known him forever.

You should be thinking with your brain and not your heart.

But....

You still love him, and believe in second chances.

"Joshua."

He perked up, anticipating the worst as you pulled up a chair to sit in front of him. For you to say his name like that couldn't have been good.

Maybe you were gonna side with all the rest of them and spit on him.

Maybe you were gonna say that you're leaving him alone here, as Dr. Hill had warned would happen.

Maybe you were finally going to tell him what an unforgivable monster he wa-

"I believe you're innocent. You're not one to take a life. No matter what they say." You suddenly spoke, putting a hand to his soot-coated cheek

Almost immediately, his twitching stopped, and he stared straight at you.

It's like you put him in a trance.

"I'm not gonna leave you."

"..e-even though I've been..all messed up?" He asked cautiously. "I-I mean..I haven't been a good boyfriend lately..."

"That hasn't stopped me from being there for you before." You chuckled. "We're gonna work through this. Even if it's just you and I."

"............"

"I believe you when you say you didn't kill her. Do you believe me?"

It took him a few moments to study your expression, seeing the genuine care and warmth in your eyes. Despite all the horrors you've seen tonight, there was still a spark of hope in them.

That was the light he needed.

"...I-I do..I really do." He sniffled, resting his head on your shoulder, grateful that you didn't push him away despite being covered in dirt and fake blood. "'m sorry...I-I don't deserve you."

"Oh, honey..." You put your arms around him, sighing softly as you felt him tremble against you, tears slowly dampening your jacket. At this point, you knew you got him back, and you were so relieved. "We'll figure something out. Just stay with me."

"You don't think I'm a monster..?" He asked through his sobs. "I mean, everyone treated me like one...you've seen them.."

"....I know. Neither of us can change how they feel. But listen, the only monster here is-"

All of the sudden, a shrill inhumane screech echoed from somewhere outside, deep in the woods, interrupting the tender moment between you two.

Josh sat up with a start, his tearful eyes wide and terrified as he looked to you. "Wh-What was that?"

"That's the real monster I was gonna mention. They call it the Wendigo. Hang on." Crouching down, you managed to find a small pocketknife on his toolbelt, using it to cut the ropes binding him. "It's fast. But it's blind as fuck. We need to get out of here."

Nodding, he got up as quickly as he could, having no time to rub his aching wrists as you grabbed his hand.

The shrieks became louder, forcing you two to hide further inside the shed, sticking close to the back wall where the shadows were darkest. "Shit. Don't move a muscle, okay?"

His breath hitched as the wendigo dropped down in front of the entrance, creeping inside the small building to look for prey. But he took your advice and tried staying still.

You could practically hear you own heartbeat as you held your breath, thumping louder and louder as the creature wandered around. Josh watched it scrape its claws along the wall, creating a sound most unpleasant in an attempt to make him flinch.

It then made direct eye contact with you both.

While you managed to keep perfectly still, you could hear Josh's quiet whimpers, indicating he had a much harder time considering how jittery he was earlier.

All you could do was hope and pray it would leave.

Otherwise...both of you were dead.

Just when you thought your boyfriend was going to lose it completely, the distant snapping of a branch caused the wendigo to turn at blinding speed and sprint out of the shed, returning to the surrounding woods.

"Okay...thank christ.." Letting his hand go, you took a breather, only to see that he was still standing rigid. His eyes showed nothing but pure terror, as he began mumbling something like "was it real" under his breath.

"Josh? Baby?" You shook his shoulders a bit, and he blinked several times, coming back to reality. Relief immediately crossed his face as he realized you were still here. "It's okay. It's gone."

"Tha....That thing w-was real?"

"Yes. I know how to outsmart it. But we can't stay here. We'll be safer at the lodge with the others. We just gotta keep our heads down until then."

"But..what about the-?"

"Don't worry about them. Let's worry about getting out of here, alright?"

Wordlessly, Josh nodded, practically clinging to your arm as you both headed outside and down the snowy trail. He kept mumbling incoherent things, reassuring himself that he was safe with you.

Obviously, he seemed pretty shellshocked, considering the monster he just encountered was real and not a product of his imagination.

He didn't know whether that was better or worse.

Either way, you allowed him to hold onto you, knowing he needed someone--anyone--to lean on right now. And fortunately you were exactly the person he needed.

The only one who could help him come back to his senses.

You swore to never abandon him, and you intend to keep that promise even after all that happened tonight.

You still loved him, and he loved you.

That hasn't changed.

[sugurouge]

— can you try me? nanami kento x f!reader

contains! — mdni: smut, pet names (little devil, perfect / good girl), dirty talk, reader gets carried around and manhandled, wall sex, teasing, size difference, praise, one or two spanks — 3.2k words

summary: after a rough day, there's only one solution to kento's pent up frustrations

Days like these are the worst, Nanami thinks once he closes the door to your apartment and allows himself a moment of breather. He can already hear your favourite creator talking in the living room, the sound of the TV mixing with your clueless giggles to leave no room for Kento’s tired sounds to arrive in the next room.

The best course of action is to shed himself off his belongings and make his way over to the kitchen. The ghost of his tall figure dances in your peripheral vision, luring you in to immediately get up to follow your grumpy-cat of a boyfriend towards his desired destination—the stash of treats hidden in one of the kitchen cabinets.

“Oh, oh, somebody had a rough day…” you conclude upon his silent search for something sweet. He can’t help but feel caught red-handed. So Nanami only leans back for his head to pop up behind the door, tired eyes swiftly roaming over your figure before his attention gets redirected towards the treasures inside your cabinet. “Yeah,” is his quiet reply, and the crinkle of wrapping paper follows suit.

You won’t even attempt to hide your chuckle upon his little pick-me-up ritual, you’re too used to him being a softie by now. “What about having proper dinner instead of sweets, Kento?” you propose while you stalk over to him and wrap your arms around his waist as you place a chaste kiss on his back.

He cringes at the drawl of his name, well aware of how counterproductive and immature his cravings for sweets as comfort are, yet plops another chocolate in his mouth. “Maybe later.”

How a man his height frees himself that quickly from your hug always leaves you dumbfounded, but you let him play his game of hard to get. “Well, anyway… I’m going to continue watching that travel series, feel free to join me,” you tease, knowing exactly that he can’t resist the temptation.

But at least you give him some time and space as you’re sat on the couch. Nanami continuously fiddles with the wrapping paper of his recent chocolate while his attention lingers on the screen, eyes glued to the TV and the heavenly beach scenery. He definitely needs to book a vacation with you soon.

You close the gap between your bodies over the course of the night, slowly shuffling towards his figure as you adjust your sitting position. From leaning against the arm of the couch to sitting cross-legged and finally, carefully, your fingertips brush over his hand once you lean your head against his shoulder. You feel a soft kiss pressed to the crown of your head and smile to yourself, hiding your face behind the firm muscles of his biceps. “Meanie,” you mumble, and your eyes peek up to his face.

Nanami’s head is already turned towards you, a certain gentleness lingers in his eyes that are illuminated by the TV screen as they meet your curious gaze. “Come here,” is his demand while his hand already holds the back of your knee, to swiftly pull you on his lap to straddle him.

Your arms find rest around his neck to allow yourself to bask in his scent, the lingering fragrance of his body wash calming you down as you place soft kisses on his cheek. The gentle pressure applied on his neck by your fingers tempts Nanami to close his eyes, his arms moving to rest around your waist, pulling you in for a close hug. “Wanna talk about it?” you question with a soft voice. The use of your fingernails on his scalp sends shivers running along Kento’s spine.

“No…” Nanami starts but interrupts himself with another sigh, “maybe later. I don't want to burden you with troubles you cannot help me with.” You gently cup his face and redirect his gaze to meet yours, hoping for him to notice the love pooling in your tender gaze. “You’re the best,” the words are whispered against his lips, yet you don’t fully close the distance to let him decide the course of the evening.

Don't play games with him tonight.

You feel his fingertips dance upward your spine to cradle the back of your head and let his lips crash with yours. He’s so greedy, so needy for love, you can tell by the way he prolongs the kiss until he nearly runs out of breath.

And despite enjoying these types of kisses more than anything, you break away. A slightly annoyed groan slips past his lips while his arms return to lay around your waist as his forehead rests against your shoulder. Once this man gets a taste, he turns greedy; you’ve learned that this not only applies to sweets—but to you as well.

So he tries once more. Kissing you once more; ever so gently while thumbing your cheek. Nanami’s soft lips mould against yours as your tongues meet between parted lips at such an awfully slow pace, he can practically feel you grow needy in his hold. His teeth nibble on your lower lip, tugging on the sensitive flesh before pulling on the soft flesh. Tender eyes immediately meet yours, lust hidden in both pairs as you stare at each other. “I missed you a lot today,” Nanami murmurs, while featherlight touches explore your sensitive body. His kisses roam along your neck and the burning trail of his fingertips flows along your calves and thighs.

“I missed you too,” you exhale, craning your neck for him as your eyes fall shut, fully basking in the he addictive feel of his touch ruling over your body and mind.

The whispered demand of “tell me what you want,” sends goosebumps to spread over your skin. Long fingers pull the straps of your top and bra off your shoulder, allowing Nanami’s lips to fully explore your collarbone and litter kisses along your body like you’re his favourite candy. The rough pads of his tongue wet your skin as he licks over the irritated areas where he previously sucked.

“Is it—, is it weird if I just… just want you to use me tonight?” Nanami curses beneath his breath, and you feel his grip on your body tighten, blunt nails digging into the soft flesh of your ass as he hums in reply, head dipping lower until his bangs tickle your collarbone.

His kisses lead to your chest, where he tugs at the hem of your top to further expose your breasts. “You wear so much… how do you expect me to spoil you like this?” he complains with a trace of irritation in his voice. His hands dip beneath the hem of your top and tease your skin. “Be good for me and take it off.”

Yet his patience seemingly runs thin as he already lifts the fabric to expose your figure, carelessly throwing the top over his shoulder as his lips immediately attach to your chest once more. Sloppy kisses cover your skin until he arrives at your breasts, his hands gently squeezing your soft mounds above your bra—desiring to hear your moans for him as his teeth graze the sensitive skin.

With his warm palm pressed flat against your back, he shares warmth and strength with you as you lean back further, allowing his kisses to cover your sternum. “Kento,” you practically mewl his name, your fingers tugging at his roots as your hips roll against his, seeking friction where you need him most. “Kento, please…”

Nanami pulls back almost immediately, the tip of his nose following the path his lips created on your skin until his mouth meets yours. “Patience is a virtue,” the words nothing but a husky murmur. But your fingers know better than to hold still, already palming his biceps and shoulders. You brush your nose against his, the plea in your eyes clear as day as you drive him towards madness. “Want to feel you inside me... Can’t be patient if all I want is right in front of me, Kento—,” a surprised yelp interrupts your words as he simply hoists you up.

The sheer strength behind his actions makes you jump in his hold and your arms fly around his neck to stabilise yourself. Nanami simply chuckles right next to your ear, teeth nibbling at the flesh. “Not so cheeky anymore,” his hands guide your legs around his waist, carrying you out of the living room to make his way to your bedroom.

If it wasn’t for the little demon inside you, convincing you to already move your hips against his, moaning sweetly just for him. You break one of his rules by marking his neck, lips attaching to his perfect skin and sucking a deep patch of red, which causes him to hiss and land a spank to your ass, quickly followed by a particularly painful pinch.

You won't even attempt to hide your amusement, giggling so innocently while further pushing yourself against his body until your back meets the cold wall of your hallway and Nanami forces you to look at him, grip on your hair strong as his face hovers above yours.

You simply stare at him, challenging him for actions. Nanami’s expression seems calculated as his eyes roam over your face until they lock on your lips—which widen into your cheekiest grin. “Kento~,” is your sinfully innocent sigh of his name. You arch your back and place one hand on the nape of his neck, pulling his face towards your breasts while you unclasp your bra with your free hand.

“Little devil,” he mumbles, but complies as he takes one nipple between his lips, letting the tip of his tongue swirl around the nub as his teeth play with your sensitivity.

Your hips grind against his clothed erection, slow and teasing, to have him grunt and seek further pressure. “Sometimes…” he breathes, but pauses to clear his thoughts. “Sometimes…?” you repeat. The audacity to chuckle over his struggles annoys Nanami further as his icy glare meets your twinkling eyes. “Sometimes I could simply—,” Nanami leans closer, exhaling a breath over your ear that makes your eyes fall heavy. “Simply fuck you until you beg me to be nice again. But you want that, don’t you?” Your nod follows before he even finishes his words, and you turn your head for your lips to brush against each other once more—greedily pulling him down to kiss him again.

Your moans meet between your parted lips, mouths hungrily moving against each other as flimsy fingers rake over his clothed chest. The desperate whine from your lips upon not being able to directly feel his muscles beneath your touch is almost too cute.

Your feet reach the floor once your lips part, leaving you awfully aware of your usual size difference as you gaze up at him. 

Nanami follows your request in a heartbreak, unbuttoning his dress shirt and throwing the fabric carelessly aside, so unlike his usual prim and proper behaviour. You really bring out the worst in him. 

Your shameless gaze tracks every little crevice on his built figure as you subconsciously wet your lips. “Greedy,” he mumbles, yet he knows he isn’t much better, as his fingers already run along your hips and dip beneath the fabric of your shorts and panties until they fall to the floor. 

You stand on your toes as you search for his lips, one hand tracing over the shape of his erection beneath his pants before finally freeing him from his restraints. His cock rests heavy in the palm of your hand, but the satisfaction your smaller hand offers him is worth millions. Nanami’s hands rest against the wall behind you, his head lolling forward until his erratic pants fan over your skin.  “And so, so impatient,” you complete his previously started sentence as you pull back. 

The moment you bring your fingertips to your lips, your eyes meet his, to ensure Kento witnesses your tongue cleaning off his pre-cum from your hand. You love to make his composure falter. 

He exhales a shaky curse before you see his jaw tighten, brows creasing in frustration, or confusion(?). “How—, why do I still want to ruin you even when I’m in a bad mood...” His quiet confession draws your bottom lip between your teeth, it makes you clench around nothing as desire starts to overflow inside you—a selfish part of you loves his sour mood. The slow kisses you plant along his chest only make it harder for him now. Nanami’s hands land on your waist and pull you close against him, his subtle moans meeting your ear right away. “Then do it,” you mumble as your hand returns to move along his shaft. 

Yet you don’t expect his fingertips to immediately dig into your ass and lift you once more. You squeak as your hands grip onto his shoulders, searching for some sort of stabilisation. Nanami presses your back against the wall, his chest cages your body between the hard wall and his muscular frame, with the tip of his cock prodding against your entrance. Yet he refuses to lower your body in his hold. 

“Do what?” he asks, seemingly clueless, while the tip of his nose bumps against yours. He can see the answer clearly in your eyes, but it's just so much more satisfying to hear it coming from your lips. “Ruin me.” You demand with a gentle whisper. It rewards you with a rare smile to soften his stern features, while Nanami steadily lowers your position, allowing you to feel each drag of him inside your walls—despite the almost embarrassingly easy entrance thanks to your arousal. 

Nanami presses your back against the wall as he straightens himself to stand at full size. Your limited mobility leaves him in full control, his cock slowly thrusting inside you until he feels you adjust to his girth. Your hands wander over his body, appreciating his broad shoulders or tugging on his hair as his movements gain strength. You moan his name in return, arms snaking around his neck for support as he keeps pressing you against the wall while his cock drags along your clenching walls. 

The desperation of your walls trying to keep him inside seems utterly amusing as a rare tease slips past his lips right into your ear: “Greedy, always so greedy.” 

He moans lowly and leans his forehead on your shoulder as he keeps thrusting—bouncing your body up with each push inside you with ease. His hands squeeze your hips, further controlling your movements when he creates some space between your body and the wall. 

Your eyes widen in shock—the fear of falling makes you involuntarily clench harder. “Afraid I can’t manage to hold my woman?” Nanami feels challenged, the struggle in his voice clear as you refuse to loosen up around his shaft. Until only your shoulders rest against the wall and his gentle grip helps you grind against his pelvis. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, your hips subconsciously applying further pressure until the delicious friction of his cock has your thighs twitching against his hips. 

Your moans meet between your bodies as you slowly circle your hips, grinding against his pubic bone as you feel your orgasm approaching. Nanami busies himself by dousing your chest and stomach with deep kisses, holding still to the best of his ability despite the need to simply thrust into you. 

“You feel so good,” he murmurs. Groans escape him as his hips stutter against you, his cock throbbing inside you and twitching in utter despair. Your legs jerk at his actions, your back arching just a bit more as another moan falls from your parted lips. 

You lure his eyes to open again with a seductive drawl of his name, forcing him to witness your hands roaming over your body; along your chest as your fingertips redraw the round of your breasts before you cup them. Gently fondling them in front of him and playing with your nipples, you don’t even try to hide your deep moans. 

Nanami clenches his jaw, biting back his groan as you pulse around him so perfectly. How badly he wants to play with your breasts. 

He returns to fully press your back into the stone, his hips leaving no room as he grinds up into you, stimulating your clit once more. You paw at his chest and shoulders, your head leaning back as you gasp for air. The way he holds you open and simply thrusts into you is erratic. 

You feel yourself getting closer to the edge, and he feels your nails scratching his back, leaving careless marks like he was your personal scratching post. “So close,” you promise, biting your bottom lip as a smug little smirk decorates his handsome features. “Good girl, such a perfect girl.” 

Yet even the strongest man gets overtaken by exhaustion eventually. And spoiling you with his deep thrusts and his kisses, moans and groans can get tiring.

You kiss him almost frantically, your back lifting off the wall as you fully cling onto Nanami. Overwhelmed with your need, he topples a few steps back. Luckily, he is a man of quick solutions—opting to get down on his knees and place you on the carpet of the hallway. His hands grip your thighs and press you against him as he ruthlessly snaps his hips against you, his cock hitting just the right spots. 

The mess you’ve turned him into is the prettiest version of Kento you’ll ever see, sweat dripping down along his temples and over his chest—highlighting his lean and strong build as his brows furrowed in deep desperation. 

Strangled moans and harsh pants come from his lungs as he makes you cream all over him. Your fingers nearly claw at his wrist thanks to the perfect pressure applied by his thumb on your clit as he continues to fuck you through your orgasm. The countless moans of “Kento” and “so good” sound like music to his ears, he never thought he’d be a man who could listen to a song on repeat.

Once he finally allows himself to let go, he blankets your smaller figure with his frame. Nanami’s hips maintain a shallow pace, spreading his cum inside your deeply stimulated cunt while he touches your figure with tender care until his arms reach around your back to hoist you up into his lap. 

Your body feels almost limp from your orgasm, making it awfully alluring to allow yourself to lean into his chest and close your eyes. Nanami’s fingers brush your hair out of your face, the thrumming of his heart hammering against his ribcage quite clear for you to witness as he holds you closer against him. 

“Are you okay?” both of you ask at the same time, to which he offers a rare chuckle as he shakes his head. “Let me clean you up, yes?” A simple hum is all your tired reply consists of, simply letting him carry you to your bathroom. 

You could already pass out once the soft cloth stops teasing your sensitive body parts—if it weren’t for the curious fingers touching your figure while water begins to surround both of you. 

Actually, days like these are the best, Nanami concludes, as long as you’re there.

dividers by @/cafekitsune + @/strangergraphics

[soulren]

Go spend some time on male pattern baldness or male(AMAB) balding forums/subreddits and such. I did after realizing it is happening to me and the ammount of people who truly don't realize how BRUTALLY it tanks people's confidence and mental health is insane.

There's no cure to baldness by the way, and it can start at any time and there's no way to predict how fast or slow it will go. The only real working option is a daily pill that usually just halts it, but it can stop working or just slow it down or cause major side effects. To regrow you have to use a daily topical solution, or use a roller to wound your scalp. None of these are surefire by the way, and if you stop them you'll just lose your hair and whatever you regained. It's a daily involved thing that might not work and often at best just retains. The best drug, the one that occasionaly gives regrowth, also causes shedding at the start, and can have side effects from growing breasts to brain fog to EDsyfunction(sorry, censoring cause tumblr). Now, those are INCREDIBLY rare and almost never happen but it weighs heavily on the mind of those already spiraling.

But that's just background. What I'm here to talk about is the pure woe you'll see on those forums. People speak as though their lives are over, as though they've lost every chance of finding a woman(predominantly, there's a running idea in such places that women don't like bald men or like them less) or doing anything. You can read countless stories of people who describe that they no longer go outside, are now filled with anxiety and self-hate, have gone from extroverted to never showing their face. And some of these people are kids who lost their hair in high school or even before, or are holding as best they can to a very receded hairline and feel like there is nothing they can do.

And then there's something touched upon far less in those communities, but is important to bring up here; baldness and masculinity. There's the horror of knowing so much of society sees a bald guy as a very masculine guy, at seeing that the best advice for being hot and bald is "grow and beard and big muscles bro". Imagine now you're AMAB balding and nonbinary, or a trans woman who doesn't want to be on hormones.

Just genuinely take the time to look at those forums no matter who you are. Understand what these people go through, what I am currently going through. It is soul-crushing, spiraling, brutal. I have the dream of one day being like Brennan Lee Mulligan or Matt Mercer and starting to lose my hair made me feel like I could never. I felt like and still feel like I would have to be masculine, have to be a bro-y dude, have to look older than I was(I'm fuckin 22). It was the feeling that I could never dress feminine again, never present as a woman when I wanted to again, that I'd always be viewed as a bald guy before anything else.

This is an incredibly vulnerable post for me, and I hope it reaches you all as well in a kind and understanding mood. There's a tendency online for people to joke about baldness, to make fun of it, to treat it as a playfull silly thing but it fucking ruins lives, and it shouldn't. It happens to half the population's sort of bodies and very often. It should just be a neutral thing. You don't need long hair to be feminine, you don't need hair to be feminine. You don't need hair for anything. I guess I'm just saying in general that everyone should be kinder about balding, more understanding, and view it with as much import as they'd view the pixels between this sentence and the next. None at all, I mean.

And for those like me, very feminine guys who wanna keep that and don't want a beard and are terrified of balding, here's some names and I do hope others that see this will add more; Mr. Bruce (also in The Correspondents(band) Alex Ward in LA By Night Jason Carl in LA By Night Cecil Baldwin of Welcome To Night Vale Bob The Drag Queen RuPaul(in looks alone, I know about the whole fracking stuff but this post is about looks) tananasho on instagram Also your mannerisms and style of dress will convey femininity far more than your hair. Yea sure a front-on neutral shot of you may not and maybe you need makeup and stuff, and hell maybe a lot of people might reject you more but it'll just filter down to the people for you.

And to all you artists and writers and creatives; make more bald characters. Try it out. Feminine ones, masculine ones, all sorts. None of the copout nonhuman sort, just dudes and girls and mates and individuals who are all sorts of things and also bald. It might make a few of the people going through the various vortexes of pain that balding causes feel a bit better.

And to those noticing I did not adress female hair loss much here, that was intentional. I am AMAB and currently a nonbinary guy who goes by any pronouns but often likes to present as fem. I learned I was possibly losing my hair and lost two months of my life, no work or going or anything, to male hair loss forums and research and spiraling. Checking my hair twenty times a day, unable to sleep, unable to eat, unable to think. And my situation was NOT unique, but it also did not give me any experience or understanding of female hair loss and what AFAB people may go through with that, so I don't feel knowledgeable enough to speak on it. Also living with baldness WILL get easier and you will find something that works for it, by virtue of simply living with it. Things get easier with time.

[fuctacles]

<< 9 | 0 | 11 >>

Eddie doesn't believe dreams have meaning. He believes your brain simply relaxes after a day of working, letting everything it saw and thought run freely and stick into weird, meaningless shapes. 

But that morning, he woke up with a whine.

He's dreamt of Steve's puppy dog eyes looking up against his chest. He's dreamt of grocery aisles navigated with a leash in hand. He's dreamt of fur and skin and eating at the table, him from a plate, and Steve from a dog bowl. 

And it made his sad heart constrict and ache. No matter how much he's been dragging Steve around to see their friends and to prepare for their little party, he still has been off and distant. Eddie was missing something, and Steve wouldn't tell him what it was. 

The party is this weekend, and today he's helping Steve prepare the backyard. It's the last moment to coax it out of him. Gently. And preferably without him noticing. 

It's a weird thing to take note of and enjoy, but Eddie still does—carrying a barbecue out of a shed is something only humans could do, and he's elated to be able to do it with Steve. He pats his hands against his jeans, dusting them off leftover dirt and ash.

"Good job!" he says with a grin and reaches out towards Steve. It works, his friend ducking his head with a smile to accept a quick scratch against his scalp. Eddie feels proud of himself more than he ever did for passing an exam. He's tip-toeing the line between Steve's two forms, with full intent to breach it soon, and he's eating out of his hand. 

Huh.

Maybe he should try that at some point, too.

They find another barbecue, smaller than the last one, and bring it out as well, and after a short break, they start cleaning. While pulling out lawn chairs from the pool shed, Eddie finds some old toys. And among them, a tennis ball. A golden opportunity Eddie is unable to pass. He runs outside, where Steve is cleaning the pool.

"Catch!" It's all the warning he gives before throwing the ball at him.

Steve turns to him and his eyes widen joyfully when he spots the ball. He hesitates for a millisecond too long, but still manages to catch it, the net he's been using to fish out leaves falling to the ground. He throws the toy from one hand to another, almost transfixed, before looking up.

"Since when do you like throwing balls around?" he asks, cocking his head. 

"Since I have a dog to play with." Eddie grins at him. "Wanna play fetch?"

Steve's arms fall and Eddie thinks he might have overstepped this time. That's it, their tentative friendship is gone. Who's going to hug Steve now?

"You're joking."

"Try me." Eddie lifts his chin, digging his grave deeper. 

Steve shuffles his weight from one leg to another, the ball in his hand moving hypnotizingly. 

"Are you going to make fun of me?" he asks, looking up all blasé like it wouldn't hurt him. For now, it's only hurting Eddie that he could think of him like that.

"Of course not," he protests. "I just thought it could be fun. I'm sorry if it's like, overstepping or something." He raises his shoulders in a defensive shrug. Steve considers him for a moment. 

"It could be fun," he admits eventually, before throwing the ball straight at Eddie's chest. He scrambles to catch it, so he completely misses the moment Steve shifts. When he looks up, he sees the dog already shaking out from the polo Steve has just been wearing. 

Relieved, Eddie raises his hand, Steve's muscles tensing in anticipation, and when he throws, it's like a spring let loose, flying after the ball. He grins, and he can see the same delight in Steve's eyes when he proudly brings the toy back. 

"Good boy," Eddie praises him after he gets the slightly damp ball back in his hand. But he can feel Steve tensing under his hand when he scratches his head. He frowns. "You don't like that?"

He shakes his head, and Eddie presses his lips together.

"No, you don't, or no, you do like it?"

Despite the dog's limited expression, he can sense the exasperation as they stare at each other. 

"Okay, uh, do you want to be called a good boy?" he clears up his question. 

Steve hesitates but nods. 

"Okay, you got it." Eddie smiles, giving him another scratch before throwing the ball again. He watches Steve dive between the untamed bushes that surround the backyard. As the dog struts back, he forms his next question but waits till the ball is back in his grasp before he asks it. 

"Do you want to be called a good boy when you shift back?"

Steve stares at him.

Eddie stares back.

It's a tiny thing, easy to miss, but Steve nods. Eddie smiles at him. 

"You got it, Stevie," he says, reaching to give him more scratches. "So good, telling me what you need. All you gotta do is ask, okay? Don't be shy, man. We're friends. "

Impulsively, he leans in to plant a kiss on the slope of his furry snout. He throws the ball again.

So Steve needs some praise and reassurances? He can do that. 

Tags: @noodle-shenaniganery @jaytriesstrangerthings @imaginary-maggie-waggie @samsoble @croatoan-like-its-hot

@dragonmama76 @storyranger @scoops-aboy86 @ollyxar

[anakinca]

Thinking about anakin crying in your arms while you hold him because he's never felt so loved before 💗😭

—❝the rest of our lives❞

anakin skywalker x reader

tw ; nothing, just pure fluff

a/n ; angel, you absolute GENIUS. this prompt is so fucking adorable i'm literally sobbing my eyes out 😭i loved this request so much that i literally had to crawl my way out of my deep dark hole of writers block just to write this, that being said, this is only a small imagine BECAUSE of said writers block.. but anyway, i hope you all enjoy this, angels !! also send me a message or comment if u wanna be added to the taglist <3

PEACEFUL NIGHTS LIKE THIS ARE WHAT ANAKIN CHERISHES MOST. The nights where he can finally come home to you—not needing to put up his whole tough front up for anyone anymore. He can express his every emotion, be completely vulnerable, and you won’t bat an eye. You’d only comfort him and give him the love and reassurance he needs to get through it, and not the backlash and the disappointment he always receives from any of his fellow Jedi. 

So, when the stars are shining bright in the Coruscant skies, and the lights of all the ginormous skyscrapers are peering into the windows of your flat, it’s there he finds solace in the comfort of your arms. It’s the very salvation he needs to not let his breath go to waste and to keep the light inside of him alive—as long as your heart stays beating. 

"Come here, Ani,” you whisper softly as you thread your fingers through Anakin’s hair. He leans forward to bury his face in the crook of your neck, sighing in relief as you massage his scalp and press your lips gently against his forehead.

The feeling of his hair against your fingers as you card them through his thick, sandy blonde hair is relaxing, almost as much as it is for him, his much needed relief. 

He can’t help but let the tears flow down his face as he gives in to the desire to be loved in your arms, and you can feel it dampen your neck slightly, your lips curving down. 

Leaning back to cup his face, you look at him with concern, "What's wrong, my love? Why are you crying?" You ask him softly. 

He swallows the lump in his throat as you wipe his tears away with your thumbs, "I just never had anyone hold me so gently before. It feels like I'm finally home." He mumbles out tearfully, not bothering to stop his voice from breaking like he usually would—he knows he doesn’t need to pretend when he’s with you. 

Your lips quirk up into a bittersweet smile as you kiss his tears away, "I'll keep holding you like this for the rest of our lives, Ani.” You let out a sigh, leaning your forehead on his to look into his eyes. His glossy eyes open, the deep ocean blue staring up at you, glazed over.

It's suffocating, to a degree, like drowning—drowning in what is him. But, as he looks back up at you, those same suffocating blue eyes hold a degree of love incomparable to any man before him, to any being in the galaxy.

“I'll love you ‘till my last breath, and I'll be here, even if you don't want me or no longer love me." You continue, wiping away another tear that sheds from his glistening eyes.

Anakin sniffles quietly as he listens to your words, his heart swelling and pounding in his chest. “I’ll always love you, no matter what happens… and I’ll make sure that nothing happens.” He whispers to you with utter devotion and love swirling in his eyes. The tone in which he said it made it sound more like a vow than a promise—and it’s from that, that you know he’s telling only the sincere truth.

His thick lashes flutter shut once more as your hand continues to move, his tears now coming to a stop as he relishes in the feeling of your tender touch.

And as you both lay on the bed, his face now buried once again in the warm crook of your neck, and your hand rubbing his back soothingly, you swear to yourself that you will protect this man with your whole heart and soul, even if you have to slay the dragons that dare to taint his winsome mind. Because you love him, and there's nothing in this world you wouldn't do for him—and you know he feels the very same, if not more. 

@thesassypadawan

[m1ngkis]

Jeong Yunho #NEEDTHAT (18+)

A/N: MINORS BE GONE not me blushing rereading this.

It had to be going on a month since you had seen Yunho. His schedule as an idol kept him busy and yours equally so. The most you two had time to do was text each other, trying your best to find a hole in your plans to see each other.

"Wednesday?" You looked up from your calendar to gauge his reaction through the facetime call, which, if you were reading the furrow of his brows correctly, wasn't good.

"Shooting a couple of promo shows." Yunho sighed as his hairstylist continued to tug at his head, spraying a bit of product on the strands of hair.

"Afterwards?"

"Dance practice. Then, hyung has a song he wants to work on with me." You could see his frustration for the situation sit on his features. "I have to go. Manager is calling." He groaned before mumbling an I love you and waiting for you to say it back before hanging up.

It wasn't until two more weeks later that Ateez was granted a vacation and the first thing Yunho did was ask to be dropped off at your place.

His text came through your phone the same time his knocking was heard at the door. "Let me in." And you hopped up off the couch, not bothering to check the camera to see if it was really him.

With a squeal, you opened the door and jumped into his arms, holding him tight as he dropped his bag to catch you.

"I missed you so bad." Your speech muffled into his jacket as he groaned, his arms wrapping around your frame and squeezing hard.

"I missed you too."

Yunho walked inside your apartment with you clinging to him like a sloth to a tree, kicking your door closed and tossing his bag to the side. "I thought I'd never see you again." His hand cradled the back of your head as he gazed into your eyes.

"Don't be dramatic, Yuyu." You chuckled, running your palm down his cheek. He melted in your touch, grabbing your wrist to keep it in place as his eyes fluttered shut.

He rubbed his face into your hand, relishing in its softness and warmth. A moan slipped past his lips so quietly you almost didn't catch it before he kissed your hand.

"I missed your touch so bad, I thought I was gonna die."

"Really?" He nodded as he took hold of your other hand and placed them both on his head, letting your nails scratch lightly at his scalp as his arms wrap around your body again.

"Oh God, please..." Yunho whines, dropping his head to your chest and biting at you skin. Your fingers curl around his hair and tug until his head snaps back.

"What do you need, Yuyu?"

Yunho shakes his head as his hips start to thrust up shallowly. His need bleeding through his body and making him lose control over himself. "Anything...everything. What ever you're willing to give, baby please."

You pucker your lips and plant a kiss to his forehead before whispering. "I have an idea but you have to let me go for a second."

He actually whimpers at the thought of your bodies not being combined for more than half a second but his arms loosen and he allows you to get up.

"Take off some of your clothes." Only then does he realize that he didn't even bother taking off his shoes before entering your home.

He does so and sits them in the entryway. Afterwards, his jacket and shirt are shed as he makes his way back to the couch.

You run to your room and come back with a scarf. "Do you trust me?" The scarf dangles from your fingertips and a smile graces your lips.

"You're beautiful...I trust you with my life." His eyes sparkle in a way you have never seen and it almost pains you to hide them behind the material and you tie it behind his head.

Immediately, Yunho tenses. His hands curl into fists as his breathing becomes ragged. "B-baby? You still there?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm here." You run a hand down his chest, your nails grazing against the skin, causing him to shudder as his body melts into the couch. "I need you to breathe."

A shaky breath exits his nose. "C-can I touch you?" The desperation in his voice makes your thighs clench.

You don't answer him, opting to adjust him so he's laying on the couch. Slowly, you start to remove your clothing and toss it his way. His frantic hands grab onto every piece like a life line.

"Ready?" You ask. Yunho perks up. "Yes, yes. Please, Im so ready."

You hook your leg over him so you hover over his face and once he feels your thighs on either side of his head, he groans and his arms grab hold of you, pulling you down to sit on his face.

"Yunho!" You yelp as he moans against your heat, lapping up your wetness like a starving dog. "Wait!" You reach for his head, tugging at his hair.

"Mmmm hmm." His tongue laps at you and his eyes roll back behind the blindfold as moans spill from your lips. A month with out him dialed your sensitivity to 20 and its apparent in the way you fall forward against the arm of the couch. Your stomach heaving as the knot in it tightens.

"So good, Yu! Yes!"

Yunho thrusts up into nothing as your wetness drips down his chin and his fingers dig into your thighs. His own moans vibrate your skin as he guides your hips up and down his face with no regard for the mess you two make.

Your moans climb in pitch and his tongue speeds up until the knot in your belly snaps and you cum. Yunho licks it up and slips the scarf from his eyes as you come down from your peak.

"Was that good?" He asks with a smirk.

[lara4eclipze]

“i love you”

sypnosis -» "I don't care what they say — I love you that's what matters" you scolded manon

beware! -» fluff , angst , crying , comfort, sick , swearing, cyber bullying, stupid hoes

talks -» hey so recently manon got sick and she couldn't attend the MAMA Awards — some lame hoes decided to use this as a way to hate her , friendly fucking reminder she's a person not a fuckin' robot stupid bitches , I hope y'all burn btw...!

taglist (open) -» @nyssalvr @ohmyhaely @vrtualstar @c-yerim @jellaaa

it wasn't much of a secret that the girls especially lara and manon got so much hate when the documentary got released — death threats , bullying , racism and etc — it took a toll out of their mental health especially since they were just getting started being an idol

recently katseye got invited to perform at the MAMA Awards , this was big the MAMA Awards is one of the biggest award ceremony in korea — so the girls spent weeks practicing their presentation for the awards

many sleepless nights and hours upon hours of practice took a negative turn for manons body — just two days before the awards she had to announce her mini hiatus due to her having a fever

obviously she was devastated, but she knew the rest of the girls were gonna do good—although she wished that she could also perform

"babyy i miss you :((" manon texts you , it was pretty early so you went to their dorms , you drive faster than usual sensing something was wrong

you knock on the door waiting for her to open it—well what greeted you was manon sniffling with a blanket draped over her frame

"baby what's wrong??" you ask entering the abode , she hugs you not muttering a word , as your shirt absorbed her tears , you held her head closer to you but you felt like she was burning "your burning up , are you alright?— did you take your medicine yet?" a motherly way of concern starts to take over you

"i-im okay" she sniffles yet again , finally she lifts up her head — her eyes were puffy her nose red and her face coated with her tears

"no you're not baby , tell me what's bothering you?" you sternly said to her , you both sat down on the couch with her clung onto you

"I just - I saw videos and comments that I wasn't sick that I was just lazy but I'm not!—i work as hard as everyone does!" manon exclaims her hands flailing around , angry and upset tears leaving her eyes as she stumbled over her words

"I know , you shouldn't care about what they say — they're just jealous of you" you said comforting her , her frown deepens "no they just hate me" she says , your heart breaks at everything manon had to endure

"I don't care what they say — I love you that's what matters , not some stupid comment made by someone who probably can't achieve the things you have" you scolded — her tears soon dried up and a smile forms on her face

"I love you too" she smiles , her lips now on yours as a tint of pink made it's way to your cheeks — "now take your medicine" you mutter , she groans

"it tastes like shit — I'm not even over exaggerating it" manon mumbles pouting at you

"language and no just because you look cute doesn't mean you won't take your medicine" you chuckle at her attempt to stop you from making her drink her medicine

"no fair"

"you're sick not me"

after watching a movie and finally making manon drink some paracetamol — she peacefully falls asleep whilst her head was on your lap , you made a soothing motion on her scalp

"you're so pretty" you mumble looking at her peaceful face

sometimes you wish that manon didn't go thru the dream academy, or even became a member if you only knew it meant her being bullied online — yet your thankful that she was with people that loved her , eyekons, katseye, and you

manon deserves where she is now ,no one and I mean no one could tell you otherwise — she worked hard and shed her blood sweat and tears for this and for that you are proud of her

[stevenssacrab]

I Can't Wait

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Summary: You come home tired after an exhausting mission and just want to shower and go to bed, but Natasha has other ideas.

Rating: 18+ smut (minors, do not interact)

Warnings: Sub reader, soft dom Natasha, fingering, mommy kink (i'm not sorry), oral (female receiving), hair pulling, aftercare?

Word Count: 2k

a/n: Had to take a break while I recovered but I'm back baby! This is my 2nd, 2,000 word fic! I had tons of fun writing this one, hope everyone enjoys.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

You sigh, push the key through the keyhole, and open your door. This week's mission really pushed you past your breaking point, and you just wanted to get into a hot shower and wash away all the sweat and grime that had built up; you close the door behind you and sigh for the umpteenth time, tossing your keys haphazardly on the counter.

"I'm home," you exhale, kicking off your boots and walked toward your room; you barely make it through the threshold when Natasha pins you against the wall, devouring your lips; you groan, hands grasping at her hair.

"I've missed you, baby; you smell so good," Natasha uttered between kisses, inhaling your scent; she's always had this primal attraction to your natural scent; she slid her thigh in between your legs, grinding against your core, you whimper against her lips, shamelessly grinding into her thigh, she licks at your lips, silently asking permission to explore, you obliged, opening your mouth, tasting the vanilla ice cream off her tongue.

"Wait, I have to shower; I smell so bad," you whined, throwing your head back in an exasperated groan. Natasha chuckles and steps aside, snickering at the situation's absurdity.

"Don't take too long, or I'll start without you," Natasha teases playfully, choosing to lie on the bed in the meantime; you briskly walk into the bathroom, quickly shedding your clothes. Natasha's not one to make empty promises; the water is like heaven against your aching muscles, and you groan gently; you squeeze shampoo into your palm and spread it in your hair, firmly massaging your scalp, and then rinse; you suddenly feel a pair of arms wrap around you.

"Let me help you, baby," Natasha whispered hotly into your ear, squeezing body wash onto your loofa and lathering; she started at your arms, softly kneading the soap into your damp skin; you mewl into her touch, her soft hands caressing your aching muscles, rubbing her soapy hands all over your body, hugging you from behind, pawing at your tits and pinching the erect buds roughly, while suckling on your neck, you lean against her and tilt your head, giving her more space to explore, and she does, eagerly.

"Please," you beg; Natasha chuckles, biting down on your shoulder, running her middle finger through your pussy lips; you whine loudly, desperate for more.

"Beg for more, baby," she coos softly, nibbling your ear gently, hands palming your ass; you let out a high-pitched moan.

"Please, more, I need you; I'll be a good girl, I promise," you whined loudly, gripping her hand and placing it on your aching pussy, "please, I'll do anything," you keened delicately, spreading your legs, Natasha groans and obliges, expertly rubbing circles into your swollen clit, you moan loudly, resting your head on her shoulder.

"Does that feel good, baby? Do you like it when I touch you here?" she murmured in your ear, "Yes, I love it," you sobbed, drunk off her fingers, bucking into her hand boldly. Natasha gently turned your head, kissing you slowly, swallowing every whine and moan that spilled out of you; she gently slapped your sensitive clit, smiling when you gasped loudly.

“More; I need more, please,” you pleaded desperately against her lips; she only smiled, relishing how easy it is to get you riled up.

“Anything for you, my princess,” she hums, fingers playfully circling your hole, teasing you further; you whine and buck your hips forward eagerly; she snickered at your desperation, and she lifted two fingers to your mouth; you take them in without a word, gliding your velvet tongue over her digits, suckling harshly as her other hand circles your clit, she pulls her fingers out, slowly sliding one inside, you moan loudly, pushing down onto her finger, desperate for more, pumping her finger in and out agonizingly slow, you whine lustily, hopelessly trying to bounce on her finger but she pulls out entirely.

“Ah ah,” she disapproves, lowering her hand once again, this time sliding in two fingers; you throw your head back and moan thunderously, “Yes, just like that,” you babble out; she pumps her fingers in and out, curling her fingers in a come hither motion, hitting your sweet spot exactly, you mewl loudly, legs feeling like jelly, Natasha holds you up easily, she angles her fingers, hitting it with every thrust, you feel that familiar twist in your stomach, you know if she keeps going like this you won’t last long, you try to express that your close but your brain can’t think straight all that comes out is high-pitched moans, growing louder and louder by the second.

“I-I,” you blurt out, desperately trying to warn her.

“Yes, baby?” She coos, thrusting her fingers faster. She knows you are close, but she wants to hear you say it; she wants to see if you can do it; she likes to watch you short-circuit from the pleasure, to be cruel and add to your undoing; she sucks and bites at your neck, you let out a moan so deep it comes from your throat.

“Nat, I’m, oh god,” you sob; you look down and watch with your mouth ajar, her fingers pumping into you with such speed that you don’t know how you’ve made it this far.

“Are you close, baby? Do you wanna cum on my fingers?” She asks mockingly, thrusting her fingers particularly hard, punctuating each word with a hit to your g-spot; you’re past the high-pitched whines and moans, past trying to stay quiet for the neighbor's sake; all that comes out of you are throaty moans, and screams.

“Yes, mommy! Please let me cum on your fingers; I’m so close,” you cry, tears streaming down your face, simply because she loves to watch you suffer; she lifts her hand and rolls your nipple in between her thumb and index finger, and you scream, and when you thought she couldn’t go faster, she picks up the pace, lowering her hand to play with your clit at the perfect pace.

“Cum on my fingers, baby, let me hear you,” she whispers hotly in your ear, panting; you cum on her fingers, throwing your head back, moan ripping out of you, your vision goes white, and all you hear is ringing in your ears, you feel your walls spasming around her fingers, fucking you through your high, she slowly pulls out her fingers, you lift off her and turn around and stare at her, watching her closely, she puts her two fingers in her mouth, moaning, savoring your delicious taste, eyes locked on yours, you stare, body buzzing that post orgasm feel, she pulls them out with a pop, and it snaps something within you, you push her back against the cool tile wall, you drop to your knees, she chuckles.

“So eager to please,” she hums proudly, stroking your hair lovingly; you waste no time and dive in, your tongue expertly finding her clit, kitten licking it, your eyes watching her; she sighs contently, hand resting on the top of your head, you lift your fingers to her mouth, as she had done before, and she opens her mouth obediently, accepting your fingers, coating them and sucking them softly, you latch onto her clit, catching her off guard, with your fingers still in her mouth she moans gently, you pull them out and tease her hole, slowly push in one finger, pumping excruciatingly slowly, she pressed her lips together trying to suppress her moans, she’s been known to repress how good you make her feel, she wants you to earn her sweet sounds, you sit back on your heels for a better angle, you fit together like puzzle pieces, perfectly made for each other, you suckle gently on her clit, mixing between, licking and gently running your teeth along her bud, her face relaxed, she lazily ruts herself against your silk tongue, you moan sending vibrations through her body, gasping softly, gripping your hair gently, you moan again, relishing the delicious sting at your scalp, your hands glide up her legs and to her ass, pawing aggressively against her supple skin, you use your grip as leverage and help her grind down on your tongue, you flick your tongue delectably slow, treasuring the taste, watching her face contort in pleasure, her eyes are closed, her mouth hangs open, she’s basking in it all, you give her ass a smack, signaling her to open her eyes and watch you work away, she watches, bottom lip captured by her teeth, even still she’s holding back, you slide a 2nd finger in, curling your fingers, in search of her bundle of nerves, she moans quietly, watching your fingers disappear inside her, you feel the familiar texture of her spot, you know the feeling all to well, and push your fingers against it slowly, she gasps loudly, squeezing her eyes shut.

“Holy shit,” she blinks rapidly, eyes seeing stars, “don’t stop,” she pleads, chasing that feeling again; you smile; it’s too easy to get her worked up; she likes to act as if it’s not; but you’ve spent a lot of time exploring all her sweet spots and discovering what makes her tick, you curl your fingers once again, brushing against the bundle of nerves, she mewls loudly, her resolve long gone, she throws her head back against the tile, you add the third and final finger, she yelps, eyes wide watching in disbelief, you slide in with ease, curling all three fingers exactly where she wants it, she opens her mouth in a silent scream, her legs trembling violently, she lets out a loud gasp, followed by a cry.

“Oh god, yes,” she weeps, her hands gripping your shoulders, trying desperately to stay upright. Still, her legs feel like they’ll give out at any moment, “Just like that, baby, yes,” she babbles out; you thrust your fingers, hitting the perfect spot every time; you lean forward and lightly lick her clit; earning a scream from Natasha, she grips your hair and pushes you against her pussy, you latch around her clit and suck mercilessly, you can tell she's close, she moans so loud they bounce off the tile, water running cold, you grab her right leg and throw it over your shoulder, eliciting a moan so deep it pains her, her hands buried in your hair, using it as leverage to fuck herself into your face.

"Cum for me, baby," you say quickly, reattaching yourself to her clit, sucking ruthlessly; she gasps loudly and cums on your fingers, body shaking vigorously, eyes squeezed shut, panting loudly; you slowly fuck her through the high; she whimpers when it's too much, you chuckle slightly and pull out, your legs feel numb, you have trouble standing, Natasha hugs you and pulls you up, kissing you tenderly, holding you sweetly, caressing your back and shoulders, almost thanking you, you draw mindless patterns into her wet skin, soothing her muscles, kiss her lazily, hand hidden in her hair, she breaks the kiss and reaches for conditioner and squirts some in her palm, gently massaging it through your hair, you hum, basking in her fingers gingerly rubbing your scalp, running her hands delicately through the strains, she walks you back into the water, you gasp; all the hot water is gone, cold water envelops your body, you shiver, pulling Natasha closer for warmth, she soothingly rinses the conditioner out of your hair, and turns off the water, Natasha grabs the towel and dries you off, carefully patting your more sensitive parts, she helps you step into your underwear, legs still feeling a little wobbly, you support yourself on her shoulders as you step in, she playfully smacks the band against your hip, you laugh and playfully hit her arm, next she grabs your oversized shirt and pulls it over your head, you return the favor and pat Natasha's skin dry, carefully wrapping her hair in the towel, she grabs your hand and leads you to the bedroom, reaching for a fresh pair of panties, and steps into them, pulling an oversized shirt over her head, you both crawl into your warm bed and cuddle for warmth against the cold winter air,

"Goodnight, Y/N," she said lovingly, pulling you closer. You sighed happily, "Goodnight," you whispered and blissfully fell asleep in her arms.

[sleepymarimo]

𝕚 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕟𝕒 𝕓𝕖 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕤

summary: he didn't know that being yours could be so painful pairing: sanji x gn!reader cw: pining (but is it mutual??) takes place during wci, so spoiler warning! an: honestly? just sad. i may have shed a tear while writing?? idk, y'all know my style 😭 this am event got me all emotional. not a lot of dialogue, mostly descriptions of feelings and all that, so wc: 650 ⤷ based on this song! ⤷ part of this arctic monkeys mini event!

he swears it's one of the hardest things he's ever had to do.

but it was for the crew, right? it was for you?

even so, it didn't make it any easier. no amount of justification could make him feel confident in his choice. it was his unfortunate fate.

your eyes, irises that once looked towards him with joy and a glimmer of adoration, were now filled with fear and betrayal.

nami's wrath seemed like a blessing compared to what you had to offer him. 

he wanted you to slap him. scream at him. at least then, he'd feel your touch. he just wants anything other than that cold, distant gaze that made him feel like a stranger.

you cradled luffy in your arms, using yourself as a shield to protect him from further harm. the blond's heart crumbles in his chest. were you afraid of him? did you finally see him for the monster he was? it feels like his insides are getting carved out, like hot lava was bubbling in his throat and burning his lungs.

sanji wishes he can explain. he wants to tell you that it'll be okay and that this is for you. 

he'd kiss the ground you walked on, everyday for the rest of his life, if it meant that you would give him a chance to be loved by you. to be used by you.

he wants nothing more than to kneel on the dirt and beg for forgiveness. he'd let you push him to the ground with the heel of your shoes until his bloodied knees hit the bedrock of the earth. anything and everything you'd ask of him, he'd do.

because all he's ever wanted was to be yours.

pudding was a treat in her own right, sure, but you were something else entirely.

your laugh was like honey, sickeningly sweet and capturing him in a sticky web of infatuation. your voice was a liquor so strong that he'd find himself tipsy after a simple hello. your touches made him feel as if he was having his first meal in decades. as much as he wants to savor each and every flavor you offer, another part of him wants to swallow you whole.

actually? he wants you to be the one to consume him. the blond wouldn't mind being chewed up by you, reduced to pieces. the thought of being surrounded by you in your entirety is rather appealing.

he has to walk away, not being able to bear it. he has to hide it, has to push it away because, like everything else he did, this was for you.

the reluctance in his steps is masked by feigned apathy, the finality of his steps contrasting with his trembling fists. his nails dig into his soft hands, knuckles white.

then he hears it.

the sound that makes his steps falter, just ever so slightly.

a choked out sob of his name, spilling from those pretty lips of yours that he just wants to capture in his own. it's so pathetic sounding, so lowly of you to beg for a failure like him. "sanji!" you cry, each sniffle and ragged exhale ripping his heart to pieces. "please! don't go!"

even after all that he's done, you're still pleading for him?

he feels nauseous, forcing himself to continue walking towards the carriage that would carry him to his doom.

i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry. it plays on and on, repeating in his head like a broken record. a part of him hopes it'll drown out the sound of your cries.

in the carriage, while his brothers are mocking the desperate show you put on, sanji rakes his hands through his blond hair. he finds little comfort in how his fingers brush through his scalp. his body trembles and he breaks, tears spilling from his eyes.

was it always this hard, being yours?

taglist: @dimplewonie

[a-dogboys-sweet-lovers]

neuvie cuddles? fem!reader pls :)

Whoops, I got carried away and this is a bit long! (?) Anyways, general tags: sfw - cuddles - f!reader - established relationship - Neuv is being a workaholic again - Neuv calls reader "princess" and "love" - half dragon form Neuv (I am but a weak man)

It's nearing midnight; you've been quietly reading a book alongside your perpetually-busy Iudex, who, predictably, is still working on reviewing some cases. You frown slightly: immortal primordial being or not, Neuvillette, too, needs a rest. Unfortunately, there aren't many people that he would listen to regarding this matter; fortunately, you, being his lover and confidante, are one of them. Still, you decide to choose an indirect approach.

-Neuvilette, love? - you call out quietly, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

He leans into your touch much like a cat, rubbing his cheek on your hand.

-What is it that my princess desires?

This is where you put on a bit of a show.

-I'm feeling so lonely... I know you're right here, but you're so busy all the time!

It's not entirely untrue; while you enjoy just exsisting alongside Neuvilette, quietly going around your day even if you two don't interact, you do miss the rare occasions when his attention is entirely on you and you only. Besides, he does need a rest, and as do you.

Neuvilette makes an apologetic face.

-I'm sorry, love, I know I've been paying less attention to you lately... What do you want us to do?

-May we cuddle for a while?

He plants a kiss on your hand and gets up, suddenly lifting you up into a princess carry, smiling slightly. You giggle, not quite expecting him to have done that. His rather impressive height and inhuman strength mean you practically weigh nothing to him, and he does carry you around a lot because of that, but somehow he still manages to surprise you every time he does.

-Do you want us to lay down, or...?

-Yes! To the bedroom, please, - you ask him in a mock-commanding tone, pointing towards your shared bedroom in a spoiled princess impression. That makes him smile wider. He carefully maneuvres you around all the doorframes and finally places you gently onto the big, soft canopy bed, taking time to shed some outer layers of his complicated outfit to enter a more relaxed state. Meanwhile, you fluff the pillows, making some sorts of a nest for you two. With an exhausted, but still somewhat content sigh Neuvilette plops onto the bed next to you and immediately throws his arms around you. In this position his head is on your chest, and you really want to pet him like an oversized affectionate cat. When you give in to your desires, you hear a purr - right. Dragons, it turns out, purr. Because Neuvilette sure wasn't perfect before. You smile, looking at your adorable lover, who under your hands on his scalp has relaxed into a semi-conscious state... Oh, wait, what's -

You feel something slithering against your leg, waiting to circle it. It feels strange,and at first you get startled - but then you realize: Neuvilette's tail. Your lover became so deeply relaxed in your presence, his human form shifted into a more natural semi-draconic form. And his tail wants cuddles, too. You giggle quietly, planting a kiss on top of your lover's head; your legs become entangled with Neuvilette's tail, and, fast asleep, he mumbles something resembling "my love", before his body goes completely slack against yours.

Well, you definitely don't mind cuddling him throughout the night, then.

[mytheoristavenue]

Molting! Tokoyami x Reader who keeps all his feathers

Everytime he molts, Tokoyami drops tons of feathers everywhere he goes. It makes he's scalp itch, which makes it worse when he scratches, shedding more. Little does he know, you go behind him and pick up every single one you can find and you keep them in a box under your bed. You intend to use them for something, you just don't know what. Until then, you love holding them up to the sun, seeing the blue shine that covers them when they hit the light. It brings you comfort to know you have them.

[killthewhisperingart]

Sleep Tight

Pairing: Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Reader

Word Count: 529

Summary: After a long separation, Bradley finds solace in your arms as you think back on your relationship.

Warning(s): N/A

A/N: First work! I do intend on making longer fics after this, but I wanted something short and sweet to get me out of my funk. My requests are open btw ;) just in case anybody had any ideas

His skin was so warm in comparison to yours. He had only just gotten home a few hours prior, and he wasted no time in shedding his clothes and crawling into bed with you. He was exhausted, his caramel locks all askew, and soft bags resting below his eyes. He was only supposed to be gone for two months, then it turned to three, then a full six months had passed since he had been home.

You were fine, keeping up with the house, making sure the Bronco got it’s oil change, everything was fine. But Bradley felt horrible for leaving you at home for so long. He always felt bad leaving you. Even after a six year relationship, he was crushed everytime he had to go. You learned to cope, but you wondered if he ever would.

He sighs softly, nuzzling his face against your chest, his arms tightening around you. You were a bit jealous that he falls asleep so quickly, and so deeply. Soft snores escape him, and you can’t help but run a hand through his hair. 

The two of you are supposed to go to a barbecue tomorrow, and as you look down at him, you wonder if you’re ever going to make it. He had a habit of ‘hibernating’ for day or two when he comes back home. The only time he ever lets go of his Rooster persona, waking up much later than normal. He looks so scandalized everytime he wakes up half passed noon after a mission.

You look towards the window, the curtains pulled back, and the windows cracked to let some wind in. The central air conditioner had been broken for about a week, and you wanted to wait until Bradley got back home to have someone come look at it. This was a habit you’ve had since the early days of your relationship, when Bradley had found out that the maintenance man had been overcharging you for his services, and not your landlord.

The breeze blows against the curtains, and outside you can see the trees swaying softly as the sun slowly starts to set.

“We should get married,” You whisper softly, running your nails across his scalp. You said it so low, you barely heard it yourself, and you wonder if you ever even said it at all. You had been fantasizing about it for a while, maybe a year or two. But you knew just as much that Bradley wasn’t a wedding kind of guy. In the past, he had danced around the subject, avoiding it expertly, much to your chagrin. 

You know that in the morning when you both finally rise and pull yourselves from your comfortable bed, the idea of marriage will still sit heavy on your shoulders. You know that eventually, you will need to have the conversation, a conversation that will either end in marriage or end in a breakup.

But for now, you wrap your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer as you press a soft kiss to his forehead. You don't seem to mind all that much in the moment, as you are both in a bubble of love.

[dimepdf]

★  𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓𝐘 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄. + 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

masterlist. / taglist. / tip jar. synopsis. the lovely feelings Gojo would experience knowing just how vulnerable he was to your roughness.

✧. ┊    notes. everyone thank @ouchthathurts for getting me back on my writing grind, lord knows I need to start posting fics again. | — feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍

✧. ┊    genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni | drabble | slight sub!gojo | hair pulling | strength kink | established relationship | body worship | oral sex(f receiving) | cunnilingus | pussy eating | fingering | overstimulation | multiple orgasms | pain kink(?) | title Inso by this song.

IT WASN'T SHOCKING that everyone thought that Gojo was significantly stronger than he had ever shown anyone.

It was also just the fact that he never really felt the need to flaunt the mass extreme of his abilities in front of others out of the pure amount of boredom he would feel being all serious and how tiresome he would feel wasting his time fighting all the damn time, surprisingly, including over performing in front of you as well.

Because of this, it was only logical to assume from an outside perspective that he was the "strong" one in your relationship. Even if the blue-eyed man did not have an unfair advantage over you with his supernatural abilities, he would still be the one to carry the weight of having the most powerful legacy within his bored, lengthy fingertips from his hidden lean build.

Gojo frequently outshone you in strength, and that was just a result of your extreme inability to even remotely compare to the godlike level of power he possessed. However, as the saying goes, behind every strong man is an even stronger woman.

Gojo can recall the number of times your influence has caused him to feel genuine fear, even though you weren't unable to destroy demons with the snap of a finger, and that you have not shed a few tears after stubbing your toe on something.

Despite all of this, Gojo would openly admit that you were the only living thing to ever manage to strike genuine fear into his heart, as well as the only living being to actually harm him in any way.

There were times when you weren't even aware of your strength. Gojo would still wince when you would find something just too funny to the point where your body would react on its own, playfully slapping him on the shoulder or whacking the front of his chest, too caught up in your fit of giggles to see that you would manage to catch him off guard enough to knock some air out of the poor man's lungs.

So sure, Gojo had his powers, but you were strong in your way. And the mere idea of it would be enough to get your boyfriend worked up all by itself.

When you're with Gojo, you don't even bother to hold back, and he admits that he adores that about you a little too much on his part.

His silvery white hair was caught between each of your knuckles, Your nails not letting up from their death grip, and your fist balled up at the front of his scalp as his mouth parted, leaving wet kisses between your inner thighs to let out a needy vocal reaction from the tug you had at his scalp.

The raw, intimate feeling of Gojo’s mouth teasing at your sensitive clit made it impossible for your hips not to jerk against your soft duvet bedding, even despite his locked-in hold around the bones of your hips. the small indents of his fingers already leaving small marks that you both knew would mix with the warming brown of your skin into a bruising color later.

Even with his hands holding you in place, your hips somehow still managed to buck against his hold so easily, the newfound strength building from the promise of your third orgasm of the night fighting against the man with impossible ease.  

You don't even realize that your hips are rolling involuntarily to the clouded thoughts littering your thoughts as you eagerly press Gojo's face closer between your legs, a low moan of impatience escaping from your throat, wanting him to do nothing more than settle the building orgasm that rudely threatened the proper wire of all your nerves.

Without embarrassment, his long finger's piston inside of you knuckle-deep, pairing almost too perfectly with the warmth of his tongue. The lewd, wet sounds reverberate through your shared master bedroom, making your body flush with a sweating sense of heat.

He made you feel so good that it almost started to hurt. Convinced at the thought of your bones having melted into some type of putty in Gojo's grip, and yet the sight of him lying on his stomach between your parted legs, with one knee bent lazily over his shoulder—the muscle tremor was barely noticeable if it weren't for the twitch of your toes, with the other one folded up—could barely be made through the tears that clung to your lashes.

Your breath was almost heaving at the piercing blue eye contact you had gotten back, and the flutter of his long white lashes almost tickled you as they brushed against the plush of your inner thighs. You could tell he was smiling with the telltale crinkle at the corners of his eyes when he would squint, despite his mouth being all too preoccupied with eating your pussy.

As he coaxed another orgasm from your poor, trembling body, you felt as if he was holding you captive. The whimpering release tensed you farther into your euphoria, having you lean your head back against your pile of pillows.

Your fist clenches tighter into Gojo’s locks at the slight slapping noise of your thighs squeezing together with Gojo’s face smothered and caged between the thick of them.

It takes a few moments along with a few breaths for you to come down from your climax, your legs unsensing and shifting quickly to something comparable to jelly as Gojo frees himself from your plush prison, wanting to laugh at whoever would consider you weak with a deep sigh accompanied by an all too happy famous beaming smirk.

🔖 @souljagrldotcom / @toji-dabi-wife / @dilfs-lover / @venussakura / @mimixrx2 / @unheolybakugo / @dunixxd / @songbirdgardensworld / @s-witch-bitch / @chloee0x0 / @kawatabae / @haitaniwhor3 / @pluzo / @momoewn / @angel-luv-04 / @laylasbunbunny / @celi-xxmoon / @sheluvzeren / @kogoshidied / @sacvh / @disaster-rose / @zombieghoulfriend / @hoohoohope / @thisbicc / @jadeisthirsting / @zuuki / @rumi-rants / @kiyomeichann / @anotherlovelyruin / @lone-poltergeist / @wenumsmol / @namidaass / @justanotherkpopstanlol / @awkwardaardvarkforever / @lexiinanime / @melty-kisses / @kageyama-i-want-tobiors / @crissteetee / @princesstiti14 / @watyousayin / @ziggy-09 / @carcarmeowmeow19 / @p-rizz-ha / @lilvampirina / @atsumubabe / @lialia3945 / / @innocxntdexth / @simpforsat0ru / @inumakiiz /

tap here to be added to taglist.

[rascal-xo]

Hi :) first of all, I already made a request for you a month ago. And I was very happy with the outcome of it. So if you are bored sometime in the future, here is another request:

Its Holidays (You can choose which, I believe spring would be cool because it would probably rain) and the whole 141 are by their family members. So since Ghost got none, he stays at the military. Since the reader is new in the crew she doesn't know that he always stays at there.

You came home late from a mission which took longer than expected. You go to bed and can't sleep so you decide to make tea and you are surprised the you meet Simon there. You tell him that you don't have a family too and it gets kind of angsty. From then on you could decide how the story goes on...

Are they just sleeping together on the couch or is it going to continue in a more smutty way? Who knows?

Thanks in advance 🪸

When It Rains, It Pours | Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Female Reader |

Chapter Summary: You and Simon happen to be the only two on base during spring break.

Warnings: Language, Fluff, mentions of loss, trauma, a bit of sexual undertones.

Word Count: 1.6K

A/N: I’m so happy you liked the last request I wrote for!! I hope you enjoy this one too :)) Might do a pt.2 so lmk 🫶🏼

PT. 2 HERE

You had just returned from a 2 week long grueling mission, and the rain was pouring down on you as you stepped off of the plane, and onto base.

It was almost night, and the sky was gloomy and dark. You're were still wearing your gear, and the weight of it had been pressing down on your tired muscles, making them ache even more.

Your head was pounding, and you could feel your heartbeat in your ears. You let yourself look up at the sky and let the rain wash over you, feeling the cold drops soaking through the layer of your clothes that weren’t covered by the vest, and let it seep onto your skin.

You were exhausted and sore, but you knew that you had done your duty and completed the mission. Despite the rain and the fatigue, you felt a sense of satisfaction that came from knowing that you had gone through with your orders successfully.

Laswell had a lot of hope on the line with you as the new Marine recruit for the 141. Herself and Captain Price had picked your file from the dozens of qualified soldiers.

As you stepped inside the familiar lodging’s building, you were met with a silence. You dropped your duffel bag, then remembering you would the only one here.

The team had all been given time off for the spring holidays, to go to their respective homes and find some rest. You on the other hand had taken on more work instead, not having the ‘luxury’ of something to go back to.

It was better that way. You would be far more comfortable here where you had a sense of security on base, even if you were alone.

You made your way to your room, shedding off your gear and leaving it in a neat pile by the door. You could feel your muscles relaxing just from the act of removing the weight from your body.

You decided to take a warm shower to ease your sore muscles, hoping it would also help to clear your head. You turned the faucet on and stepped into the warm stream, feeling the hot water wash away the grime and dirt from your skin.

Taking your time in the shower, not wanting to rush the experience, you washed your hair, feeling the suds massage your scalp and the warm water rinse it away. You ran your hands over your body, feeling every inch of your skin, enjoying the sensation of finally being clean.

After what felt like an eternity, you reluctantly turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. You walked over to your small closet and grabbed a random Marine labeled t-shirt that you had around from your BMT trainee days. You slipped it on and felt the familiar comfort of the cotton against your skin.

Despite the warm shower, you found yourself unable to sleep. You tossed and turned in your bed, trying to find a comfortable position, but nothing seemed to work. You couldn't shake the feeling of unease that lingered in your chest, and the sound of heavy rain hitting the roof only added to your restlessness.

After what felt like an eternity, you finally gave up and sat up in bed, letting out a frustrated sigh. You rubbed your eyes, feeling the exhaustion weighing heavy on your body, but your mind refused to let you rest.

You decided to get up and make yourself some tea, hoping the warm drink would help soothe your nerves somehow. As you made your way to the kitchen area, you were lost in your thoughts, trying to gather your uneasiness.

You didn't notice another person hunched over, sitting on the couch until you were only a few feet away. Startled, you let out a gasp, and Simon looked up at you, his knives in his hands.

"You scare easily, Sergeant." He spoke, teasing yet absolutely serious in his tone.

"Sorry, I didn't think anyone else was here." You answered softly, before going to find any sort of tea you could make. Unbeknownst to you, Simon watched you going about your business, trying not to let yourself make eye contact with him.

As you busied yourself with making tea, Simon remained silent, observing you with a keen eye. He had been on a mission as well, but he had managed to complete it earlier and had returned to base before you, staying true to his callsign.

After a few moments, he stood up and walked over to you, his knives left on the coffee table where he had been cleaning them off. "Why aren't you home, Sergeant." His voice was deep, but his eyes held a glint of curiosity.

You hesitated for a moment, unsure if you wanted to open up to someone, but something in his demeanor made you feel like you could trust him. "There's no home to be at." you admitted, taking a sip of the hot tea a little too quickly before it had cooled, making you bite back a hiss. "What about you?"

Simon took a moment to consider your question, his expression unreadable. "I stick around here, Sergeant." he finally replied, not going any further into detail. "Can't sleep?" You leaned back against the edge of the counter, a couple of feet in front of the Lt.

His demeanor was a bit more relaxed than you were accustomed to seeing him. His heavy camo and skull mask were replaced with sweats and a plain black balaclava, only revealing his deep brown eyes. For the first time you could clearly see his tattoos, with his sleeves pushed up to his forearms.

"Can't catch much of it these days." You spoke, letting the hot mug rest in your hands. You could feel his piercing gaze on you, while you tried not to meet his eyes.

Simon remained silent for a moment, taking in your words. "Doesn't get much better if you're always this tense, I'm afraid." He might not have been joking, but you found humor in his blatant honesty.

"I'm not the tense one." You claimed back, a small tired smile playing at your lips. It was strange yet comforting to have someone else here, especially that someone you had never really spoken to before. outside of a professional setting.

He suddenly walked up closer to you, taking the mug from your hands and placing it on the counter. "Turn around." He asserted. You wondered if his field voice was just his all-the-time voice, but nonetheless you followed his direction.

He wasn't completely what had gotten into him so suddenly, seeing you in the kitchen barefaced and vulnerable to your surroundings. He had taken a keen liking to having you on the team, but even more having you to himself.

His hands found themselves on your upper shoulders, causing you to jerk a little. He immediately felt how tense you were, but being under his touch didn't exactly lighten that sensation.

Simon began to knead your shoulders, you felt the tension melting away. He worked his way to your arms, his strong hands working out the knots and kinks in your muscles. You couldn't help but let out a contented sigh as you leaned back against him, feeling the warmth of his body seeping into yours. It felt wrong, letting your Lieutenant touch you like that, but it felt too good to stop.

"You don't have to, Lt-"

"Simon." His voice was low this time, soft, but he didn't stop. You suddenly felt self conscious, realizing you had failed to put on any pants under your t shirt that was coming down your upper thighs.

Your heart started racing a bit as you tried to subtly pull your shirt down, hoping to cover more of your legs. Simon must have noticed your movement, but he didn't comment on it. Instead, he continued massaging your arms, his touch firm yet gentle.

His touch was surprisingly gentle for someone so strong, and you found yourself relaxing into it despite your initial reservations. As the tension in your body continued to melt away, you couldn't help but feel grateful for Simon's unexpected gesture.

After a few minutes, his hands gradually slowed down and eventually came to a stop. You turned around to face him, feeling a little bit awkward but also strangely comforted by his presence. You weren't sure what had just happened, but you knew it was something you couldn't ignore.

Your tea had gone cold, being the last thing you could think about in the moment. You stood there for a moment, just looking at each other. The air between you heavy with unspoken words, and for a moment it felt like he was seeing right through you.

You finally broke the silence, "Si-" Which was suddenly cut off by his mouth coming down onto yours.

Your mind went blank for a moment as you felt Simon's lips pressing against yours. The sensation was both familiar and foreign at the same time. You had never imagined that anything like this could happen between the two of you, but now that it was happening, it felt almost inevitable.

You tentatively kissed him back, your arms wrapping around his neck as he deepened the kiss. It was like a floodgate had been opened, all the pent-up desire and attraction suddenly spilling out between you.

As you pulled away, gasping for air, you both looked at each other with a mix of surprise and intensity. This was new territory for both of you, and you weren't quite sure what to do next.

Who knew something so wrong could feel so right.