#You can tell based on the way the burps sound that it is definitely all being done by one person

[tmntkiseki]

Not sure if this is cringy enough, but...a compilation of the burps/belches in TMNT 2003 (or broken up by season)? Given that they're ALL done by Leo's VA, I'm kind of curious just how many there were... O.o

Oh goodness, a full "TMNT 2003 burp compilation" would definitely take time to make just because there are 155 episodes to go through across seven seasons to find each and every one of them. For the time being, take this clip from "The Freaks Come Out at Night" because we got all four turtles burping + Cody.

[zhongster]

Hello! I was wondering if you’d be okay with writhing burping headcanons of VM ! Like how each would do it / how much etc

Oooooh ur speaking my language anon

THIS IS KINK CONTENT, DNI IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT

PERCY

Percy’s a super embarrassed burper

Like he’ll do absolutely everything he can to conceal/muffle it if he absolutely HAS to burp in front of someone

Unfortunately for Percy he actually burps kind of a lot 😭

Pretty much all of the gas in his body manifests that way

He also has a bit of a sensitive stomach (rich boy lol) and whenever something fucks with his system he kinda just has to burp until he feels better

Most of his burps are closed mouth burps or are otherwise muffled behind his fist

And he always follows them with a “pardon me” or an “oh dear, please do excuse me”

His burps are surprisingly pretty deep

Like really really bassy

They sound like they should be coming out of someone way bigger than he is

He’s also totally the type to burp into his napkin (shoutout to my friend for telling me ab this one bc I haven’t stopped talking about it since)

He’s definitely lactose intolerant (once again, rich boy tummy)

Vax for sure teases Percy every time he hears him burp

He gets really grossed out if he can taste the last thing he ate when he burps

Sometimes Vax (because his love language is physical touch) will like get drunk and hug his friends

Except when he does that he almost always pushes a burp out of Percy

VAX

I’ve actually already done hcs for vax here :)

His cheeks puff out right before he burps

His burps are also like

Really long

Like comically so

Luckily for him he really doesn’t give a fuck if he burps in front of the others

Save for Keyleth

But even then he definitely doesn’t care about burping in front of her as much as she cares about burping in front of him

He gets really hiccupy when he’s drunk

And that makes the super chest rattling belches roll out of him

Percy definitely scolds him about “manners” all the time

Vex definitely also smacks him for being gross

VEX

I mean if we’re going based off of her VA/Player’s burping ability then she can absolutely out-belch both her brother as well as her husband

Hers are super fucking chesty

Like they sound like they come from so deep in her stomach every single time

she pushes her chest out a little bit when it’s a big one

Vex doesn’t burp all that often but when she does she really goes for the record

Her burps tend to shock everyone around her too

They don’t expect such a grotesque sound to come from someone so visibly beautiful and dignified

I wouldn’t say she gets embarrassed really

She definitely takes it in stride

I feel like she’ll delicately cover her mouth with her fingers and release a belch that sounds like it should be coming out of Grog

Her ability thoroughly shocks Percy every time though

KEYLETH

Very “cute” burps

Not small but like

I have a video:

Also like idk if kombucha exists in exandria but Keyleth with kombucha burps >>>>

She gets pretty embarrassed towards the beginning

And I feel like most of her burps are accidental too

Like they just slip out of her with no warning

She’s definitely the type to apologize when she burps

I feel like after awhile she’d get more comfortable but she’d still be kinda apprehensive about burping in front of Vax

She definitely feels more comfortable around just Percy though, being his best friend and all

She sighs after she burps

PIKE

I feel like Pike also has really chesty burps

They’re like proper belches

And she’s also super loud and proud about it

If she has to burp she’s gonna burp

Plus she grew up with Grog so

Despite that I feel like she CAN turn on the manners when she really needs to but otherwise she really doesn’t bother

Pike’s totally the type to smack herself on the chest to get a burp out

She and Grog for sure have contests too

She for sure laughs and goes “nice” when she lets out a really good one

SCANLAN

He honestly probably has a thing for burps (he’s so real)

He also definitely loses it a little bit when Pike burps around him

Like it genuinely drives him so wild (once again, he’s so real)

As for his own burps I feel like they’re pretty average

He definitely doesn’t really do anything to suppress or try to hide them

He doesn’t really acknowledge them when it happens

He’s the type that kinda like… burps out of the side of his mouth if that makes sense

GROG

So he’s the one that we have the most material for in canon

He burps all the time and super super loud

Like the biggest most earthquakey belches you can imagine

And he does them with absolute no warning and no remorse

He thinks they’re funny

That being said he will sorta “oops sorry” whenever Percy scolds him for being gross

BONUS:

GILMORE

He has the most guttural and vile sounding burps ever bro

Like suuuuuuuper belchy

My friend and I both agree that he’s totally a freak too, he’d be into it

He’s super flirty with it too

(I need him to marry me rn)

[aching-tummies]

You instinctively try to remove my hand from your belly and continue moaning loudly and indistinctly, while I am holding the middle of your belly very strong. You keep burping.

Well, at least now I know that your belly really hurts, and that makes me smile delightfully. At the first moment I want to contunue tormenting your belly, but lately a better idea comes. I want to know everything about your bellyache to be absolutely aware of how to deal with you the rest of the evening. I release the pressure I put on your belly and gently ask you what is going on with your guts. Your weak whimpering voice as you tell me about the all-day constant stomachace is the second most arosing sound in the entire Univerce. The loug gurgling inside you is the first.

Everything is even better than I expected. The food you have eaten in the morning is definitely in your bowels now, so vomiting will just empty your stomach, but won't significantly help you.

The smile on my face becomes devilish.

Teasing your belly with my fingertips, I take my hand to your bloated round lower belly. Of course to squeeze it hard...

Your right hand is splayed over my belly, your other tugging at my clothing to stretch it over my little bloat of a tummy. I could shove you off…but I'm afraid that if I move too suddenly it's going to end in a baptism for our furniture…and the nastiness that's been brewing in my guts is not something I want to have to clean up…not to mention how much it'll burn coming up and out. My stomach hurts enough already--I don't want to add burning from either end to the list of pains I have to deal with.

"Phew…your tummy must really hurt, huh?" You use your left hand to fan in front of your face, finally getting a slight whiff of the putrid gases I've been fighting to belch out. As you lean back, I put my hands over your right wrist, trying to push your arm back to relieve some of the pressure on my gut. You aren't exactly center--you're pushing on my left side and upsetting all of the tender organs on that side of my digestive tract.

Your right hand jostles my stomach teasingly and you delight in the painful, abrupt, and very wet sounding hiccup that sounds like it started at my toes and moved through me like an electric current. I'm swallowing convulsively, desperately trying to keep the mess contained inside of me. The vile concoction bubbles angrily in my stomach and I feel very much like the cauldron of some nasty witch, like the ones straight out of a medieval play. Your hands are on the move, tracing teasing patterns over the slight dome of my belly. I swear, the vile potion feels like it is swirling in time with your movements. You're really stirring things up inside of me.

"So…what's going on in here?" You've gradually pulled back your massaging hands until only a fingertip is left swirling nonsensical patterns on my gut--not before gradually pushing my shirt up and out of the way and leaving my sickly belly bare. You punctuate your question by inserting your finger into my navel. Your pointed nail scores a perfect bulls-eye, jabbing straight into the sensitive slit at the base of my navel. You can feel my intestines around your finger as you piston it none-too-gently, feeling my innards convulsing around your fingertip.

It takes me a while to respond. My stomach rolls--desperate for the full-palm rubs you stopped giving it as soon as you managed to bunch my shirt all the way up. A sickly, long grumble reverberates and is the only sound in our apartment after your statement before it tapers off, upstaged by my equally grumbly swallowed belches. More and more gas is accumulating in my tummy as each new movement from you causes me to gasp or otherwise disrupt my breathing pattern.

In a matter of minutes, you transformed my intestinal distress into an angry, highly volatile sickness. You continue to piston your finger in and out of my navel. I only hope you don't push too deeply. "Vomit dispense button"--a phrase I saw in passing on the internet…you're going to make that a reality if you jab into my navel with much more force.

"Hello? Answer me." You whine, sliding your hand under the curve of my tummy and shaking it just a bit. Your actions dislodge a slightly larger burp and I swallow thickly against the vomit that nearly came up with it.

My stomach grumbles loudly, indignant at the treatment.

"Aww…are you going to tell me, Tummy?" You direct this at my stomach itself, leaning down to be closer to my burbling gut. "C'mon…you can do it. Tell me!" You coo at my stomach, delighting as it lets out all manner of whines and rumbles. You coax it, physically and verbally.

"I…I…nnngh…f-felt sick all day…b-breakfast…didn't…didn't digest. It's…s-still in there…s-still in me….Mmmmgh…" My brow furrows tightly and I cut myself off with a moan as my stomach cramps harshly. I curl up a little, my head grazing your chin as the cramp causes me to try and curl up. "Nnnggh…h-hurts…"

The words "still there" and "didn't digest" resonate with you. Oh yes…this is going to be fun. It's been more than 17 hours since breakfast. Knowing that something's been fermenting inside of me for nearly a whole day excites you. You wonder where in my system it wound up.

"Mmmph…i-it's been…m-my tummy's been a mess all day," My voice comes out like a whine and you can hear the pout just in my voice alone. I slide a hand over my grumbling belly, sliding my palm over it gently. "Everything's a mess in there. Did you know that stuff can actually travel backwards in your intestines? Ugh…it's so gross--uRp…ugh...nn...gross..." I cut myself off with a sharp belch and blanch at the residual nastiness it leaves in my mouth. You notice that I'm not listlessly rubbing at my tummy. My movements are calculated. My palm glides gently over the surface of my belly, barely making contact with the skin, and I'll gently press two fingers slowly into seemingly random points every so often. Each press dislodges a barely-there belch. If you weren't literally sitting on me, you'd never know…but from where you sit you can hear the sound each time something gurgles it's way upwards.

"Really? Backwards?" You hum, your hands teasingly sliding up and down my sides in some semblance of comfort. You're coaxing me into a false sense of security, trying to get me to abandon my own massage to make way for what you have planned. It works. Eventually, I take my hands off the goods. My bare belly is exposed--like prey that doesn't know it's doomed.

You slide both of your hands over my belly, applying more force than I did and leaving a trail of upset in your wake. I moan weakly, brow furrowing as I feel the trail of discomfort born from your palms. You start low, digging your fingertips into my belly, coaxing some digestive juices together. You move upward, following the feeling of tender tubes of guts and pushing the sick backwards through my intestines.

"A-aahh….ouch--urp!" You know you've succeeded when you hear an angry burbling in my upper stomach area. You managed to push something up. I moan as I feel the acidic addition force it's way into my duodenum, burning the whole way.

"Nngh...d-don't do that. Please? Ugh...y-you're making me feel sick."

You wonder where in my system the breakfast ended up. Then again, 17 hours is a long time. It's probably not solid anymore. The wet noises of my stomach excite you even more as you realize that if it's been in my system for so many hours, the ratio of acid to what-was-once-food is likely pretty skewed. You could do a lot of damage with that acid.

You slide your fingertips back down to the base of my belly, intent on coaxing absolutely all of that acid upward. It'll have to be in waves and you're fine with that. You wonder how many waves of that agony you can create and how much my stomach-organ can contain. This time, you pinch my lower guts between your fingers, squeezing harder when it feels like you've managed to trap a length of intestine between your thumb and fingers. The spasms between your fingers awaken something truly sadistic in you--like some frantically thrashing worm in a predator's claws.

"AH!" My sharp exclamation confirms that you've managed to grab hold of something painful. It took me by surprise and in that moment I feel something burning my esophagus.

[trashytummiez]

Anxious Tummy Virus

After @fungusfangs posted a cute sequence featuring Tamaki sick with a stomach virus I had to make this fic ;3

Warning: contains anxiety belly kink burps fluff hiccups indigestion nausea vomiting tummy rubs

Tamaki was always so anxious whenever he and Fatgum went patrolling. He could always feel so many eyes on him. It never failed to twist the poor anxious boys stomach into knots every time.

No villains or criminals could be seen but they always had to be vigilant. Which was why both were constantly eating whenever patrolling. Fatgum stuffed his face with whatever he could get to power up his fat if the situation called for it. And if it didn't then at least he got to enjoy some yummy treats along the way. Tamaki needed the food to power his food-based quirk.

That and his stomach was rumbling loudly behind this pouch-heavy vest. It was loud enough to make poor Tamaki blush and pray that no one could hear it.

But it also made him feel a little sick. His anxiety made his tummy really weak sometimes and it would get gurgly pretty often. But it didn't usually make him feel so oddly nauseous and weak. He couldn't explain why that wasn't the case tonight.

Oblivious to this Fatgum finished munching a bunch of food and handed down something to Tamaki. "Here ya go! Try some crab onigiri!" The fat-based hero suggested as he munched.

"...T-Thanks," Tamaki groaned and slowly took the onigiri whilst trembling slightly. Usually he trembled from anxiety but right now he was trembling from not feeling very well.

Fatgum patted his young sidekick on the back and laughed heartily. "Figured ya must be hungrier than usual today! Yer stomach's growlin' like crazy!"

Tamaki held the onigiri up with both hands and trembled shakily. This time though it was totally embarrassment and anxiety induced.

"...I didn't realize it was loud enough to draw attention..." he whimpered. "...So embarrassing..."

"Don't sweat it kid! Ya need yer energy after all right?" Fatgum assured the pointy-eared boy.

Tamaki nodded like a sad dejected little boy and nibbled on his onigiri whilst still trembling adorably. It tasted great which led to him taking another bigger bite immediately after.

Still his stomach felt oddly sour in a way it didn't usually feel.

Close to forty five minutes passed along with several snack stops along the way of their patrol.

Without warning a big hearty sounding burp erupted from the patrolling pair. Only the source was unexpected.

"Whoa! Nice one kid!" Fatgum snickered and nudged Tamaki who was covering his mouth and blushing furiously. "Ya know usually it's Red Riot lettin' the big ones out like that! Heh musta really needed that huh!"

But before Tamaki could whimper out another word of how badly embarrassed he felt, an especially loud thick sounding gurgle bellowed from Tamaki's belly. It churned so heavily and forcefully that it made Tamaki freeze in place like a petrified statue. Tamaki hiccuped then whimpered as his body trembled anew.

"Oh no..." he uttered quietly and fearfully while his tummy gave another sick groan. He winced and went slightly teary eyed from the discomfort. "No no no no no no no no no..." he repeatedly dreadfully.

"...Uh...Amajiki...?" Fatgum asked. His own big grin turned to a big concerned frown. He was about to ask if Tamaki was okay when suddenly the poor boys stomach hitched aggressively with a thick churning noise.

Tamaki gave another really thick closed mouth burp that ended with him suddenly spewing bile from past his lips. He went wide-eyed and desperately tried to cover his mouth with both hands but it was too late. Tamaki gave a loud gross sounding burp that sent a heaping load of vomit spewing from his mouth and splattering horribly onto the floor.

"Ohhh crap..." Fatgum remarked suddenly in concern. He wasn't at all grossed out at the sight of Tamaki leaning forward and puking heavily. The giant blubbery hero leaned down and very gently rubbed Tamaki's cape concealed back. "S'okay kid. Just let it out..." he assured him.

Not that Tamaki had any other choice.

The poor boy panted heavily then lurched with another stream of puke expelling from his mouth heavily onto the floor. Some passing civilians saw the sight and looked mortified. Others looked concerned as poor Tamaki continued spewing the contents of his stomach disgustingly onto the pavement.

When he finally stopped throwing up Tamaki was standing wearily as bile dripped from his fangs. The poor boy was trembling with tears streaming down his cheeks.

"...m'so sorry..." he slurred groggily but Fatgum gently shushed him and kept rubbing his back.

"S'alright kid. Don't sweat it yeah?"

Fortunately there were a few passing civilians with quirks that were able to make short work of the sick while Tamaki got washed up in a nearby restaurant.

He was so mortified that he tearfully hid his face directly into Fatgum's giant blubbery tummy like a child too scared to go to the dentist.

Fatgum frowned sympathetically as he gently ruffled the top of poor Tamaki's purplish blue hair and held up a soda for him.

"Why didn't ya tell me you were feelin' sick kid?" Fatgum asked then almost guiltily said, "...I had ya eatin' soooo much today too...!"

Tamaki muffled a thick burp in his mouth that was muffled even further by Fatgum's belly fat smothering his face then he sniffled tearfully. "I thought it was just another anxiety stomachache..." he whimpered and hiccuped sharply. He sniffled again and hiccuped again. "Ohhhh-urrrp-unnngh..." he couldn't help but burp in between his groaning both with humiliation and how badly his stomach still hurt.

It gurgled thickly but fortunately not as bad as it had been before he threw up.

But it was still enough to make him tear up some more as he buried his face even deeper into Fatgum's flabby belly and cried out. "I wanna go hooooome...!" Funnily enough his whaling was muffled by thick fatness.

Fatgum frowned anew and gently rubbed Tamaki's back. "Yeaaah you definitely shouldn't be on patrol with a stomach bug kid. Can't let ya risk fightin' bad guys with yer own gut givin' ya grief."

He scooped Tamaki up like a scared puppy and walked him out of sight away from all the people. As he carried him off Fatgum used a few of his fingers and gently placed them atop Tamaki's stomach. They alone were about as large as Tamaki's hand and he used them to gingerly and carefully rub Tamaki's turbulent tummy for him while using his thumb and index finger to hold a can of soda still.

Tamaki groaned at the feeling relaxing in Fatgum's arms. But he still blushed and looked away biting his lip anxiously with a soft whimper.

"...I'm sorry for being so weak all the time," Tamaki said with a sadder sniffle.

But Fatgum scowled and lightly poked the boys chest. "Hey you ain't weak kid. If I were a bettin' man I'd bet the farm on you against any opponent ten billion times outta ten."

"...That number doesn't make sense..."

"It means yer one'uh the strongest heroes in the biz Suneater. Havin' shot nerves don't make ya weak." Fatgum's expression softened and he more gently stoked Tamaki's gurgling belly. "...Ya shouldn't keep puttin' yerself down like that kid. Especially over somethin' that ain't even yer fault."

Tamaki nodded softly and looked down. "...I'm sorry."

Fatgum rolled his eyes but in a good natured way. "...Always friggin' apologizin'. Geez. Anyway..."

He carefully lowered Tamaki to the ground when the two were alone behind a building. The boy groaned softly and hugged his stomach with one hand. Then Fatgum handed him the soda he was still carrying.

"Drink up lil buddy. This oughta help yer guts stop stirrin' as much."

Tamaki frowned as he took the soda. "...B-But soda makes me-"

"-Yeah yeah. Why d'ya think I took ya away from all those people? It's just us kid. Don't worry 'bout it."

Tamaki glanced at the soda then looked around. They really did seem to be alone. But still he looked nervous. However when he looked up and saw an assuring smile from his sensei he sighed and gave in.

He cracked his can open and carefully took a sip. It was nice and crisp going down his throat and the way the soda felt bubbling in his stomach gave him some slight relief from the more acidic churning he was enduring.

So he swigged more soda down starting to chug it a little more feverishly. His throat bobbed as the fizzy liquids poured down his gullet and settled into his bubbling stomach. Tamaki inwardly whimpered knowing what was coming but took in more of the drink anyway while breathing through his nostrils.

After getting a good amount of the can down he pulled it aside and panted with one hand gently rubbing his tummy. A second later Tamaki's hand tightened around the middle of his stomach and then his mouth parted with a huge throaty burp. It was much louder than Tamaki himself ever was and left him panting and whimpering.

Fatgum laughed and patted the boy on the back dislodging another burp in the process that made Tamaki blush even harder. "Good one kid! Startin' to feel a lil better?"

"...Define better..." Tamaki whined. Even alone he trembled anxiously at being so loud and gross if even just around Fatgum. The soda helped to settle his tummy while the carbonation helped work some much needed gas out of his system. But the fact that soda always made him so burpy didn't do anything for his anxiety.

Still if he had to choose between burping obnoxiously and throwing up violently it was a pretty obvious choice.

So he downed more of his beverage all while nursing his tummy. When he pulled the can away again he tried to hold the burps in by giving thick closed mouth burps. But some were so strong that they forced their way past his lips and just ended up even louder.

Poor little Tamaki couldn't catch a break.

If nothing else the soda and pressure release was definitely helping make his stomach feel better. Eager to be done with it Tamaki downed the rest of his beverage and tossed the can into a nearby bin. a second later his hands flew to his stomach and Tamaki released an enormous burp so strong that it sounded like it almost came out of Fatgum.

"Almost" because Fatgum's burps could literally make the ground shake if he got a good one out.

Fatgum whistled and nudged Tamaki in the shoulder. "Damn kid! Yer gettin' some good ones out tonight ain'tcha!"

This was anything but good. But the relief Tamaki was feeling made it worth it.

Tamaki slumped back against a nearby wall and rubbed his belly up and down with both hands until he coaxed out another lengthy burp that dragged on for a few seconds and left him panting. And blushing of course.

"...Hrraaaah...okay...I...I think that's all of it," Tamaki said gently patting his stomach. "...I just wanna go hooOOOOOOoorh-me..." But his pale face soon went red as Red Riot's hair when he accidentally burped the word 'home' out at the end of his last sentence.

Fatgum laughed hysterically making his giant tummy jiggle like a mountain of jello.

"...Yeaaaaah let's getcha home kid. At this point I'm more worried ya might blush yerself t'death before this stomach bug gives ya any more grief."

For as powerful as Tamaki was? If his quirk were powered by embarrassment and anxiety he'd be unstoppable...

[hidethisblogjfc]

Sorry if this is terrible lol

Warnings- Mentions of stuffing, Scat, Eprocto, messing, brief mentions of omo (but I'm not really into that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

Boxes from varying take out restaurants are littered around them, everything from Chinese from that questionable hole in the wall down the street, to a popular burger joint a couple blocks over. They aren't all from just one day, no, some of these are from dinner five days go. They've never been as good at keeping up with the cleaning as B is, or perhaps, A thinks, this slobby behavior is just a consequence the laziness that accompanies their...…over indulging.

By now, B has been gone on their overseas business trip for about five days, which means that A has two days to get everything back into unassuming order, though, part of A warns that maybe they should get around to it sooner, rather than later. Still, they ignore it, because it just feels so good to live out their fantasy, especially after keeping it under close wraps for so, so long.

A loves B, they do, with everything in them, but there are just some things that they're almost positive B won't get behind, and so, its been easier to hide their less than conventional desires; only getting an extra serving of fries as opposed to the additional burger or two that they want, or getting a large soda instead of that extra large milkshake. Usually, A wishes that they could take things further than just a handful of fries and sugary pop, they want to push their body, see how much they can eat before they're too full to move, become an almost permanent resident of the living room sofa, only giving the weighed down cushions a break when they lug their heavy frame to bed. For as long as they could remember, that's the life that A has dreamed of. But it's quite possible that B, who's notoriously clean, neat and healthy would be absolutely repulsed by just the idea.

And A loves B too much to lose them.

But they also wish they could have that life, that dream, with their partner.

But they can't.

Which is why when B came home one day, announcing that they're cushy job, would be sending them away for a week of seminars, the idea had bloomed in A's head; this was their chance. At first A felt a little guilty, especially when the first delivery guy had shown up, both arms filled with A's order, making a joke about how they must having been having a party, because conventionally, one simply doesn't order off half the menu unless there's company. And then, when they'd offered up the card that B religiously maintains for them, A had felt even worse; they were lying to the person they loved.

But then A popped that first egg roll into their mouth. The crispiness of the egg dipped shell crunching between their teeth, the explosion of flavors; oily, fried cabbage and carrots, melding with the saltiness of soy sauce and the juicy meat inside, had them moaning in pleasure. By the time the first delicious roll was through, and A glanced down at their lap, seeing that there were five more to go, all remnants of contrition seemed to dissipate. For the first time in years, they could eat without someone at their side, reminding them to take it easy so they don't make themselves sick.

That night, the first one after B's temporary departure, A had surprised themselves by finishing everything they'd ordered. Granted, it was past one am when they'd popped the last dumpling into their mouth, and they most definitely couldn't move after, but that was all part of the fun.

Things became even more fun when all that greasy food had started digesting, or at least, tried to. A was no laid on the sofa, the blue light from the television illuminating room, t-shirt bunched up at their chest and their hand splayed on their bare, bloated gut. Loud, deep belches plagued them for a while, the scent acting as a reminder of everything they'd scarfed down; eggrolls, noodles, orange chicken and stuffed dumplings, all washed down with two liters of their favorite soda, straight from the bottle.

Ever so often, A would groan following a protesting gurgle emanating from their over worked tummy, and eventually, those gurgles and that audible sloshing, slowly began making its rounds through their system. They weren't ready for the toilet yet though; fetid gas had just started being expelled into the chair, creating a humid cloud around them and joining their wet burps.

As much as it hurt though, and as foul as their gassy emissions were, A could hardly find it in their being to be remorseful. The gas continued through the late night, progressively growing sloppier, with a dangerous moisture accompanying each drawn out, bubbling fart. Yet, despite the symphony created by their ass, their gut didn't deflate one bit, instead it continued to press against the waistband of A's sweat pants, stained at the front with sauces from their adventurous dinner. A hadn't gone to bed that night, opting to spend the night dozing off in front of the television, occasionally rousing to drowsily rub large circles on their tum.

It was early the next morning when a particularly harsh cramp gripped their tummy, squeezing out a long fart, reminiscent of a liquidly gurgle from their ass, ended in a loud squelch. The new slimy warmth seeping past their crack and spreading around the seat of their underwear made what had happened glaringly obvious, while the musky air had taken on a new foulness.

Briefly, they'd contemplated standing up, and heading to the toilet like they usually would, but the feeling of their sloppy mess gathered in their undies brought an incomparable pleasure, and so instead of standing, A simply turned on their side, bending their knees slightly, so their butt wouldn't be pressed into sofa. A short, primal grunt pressed their lips together in a tight line as they pushed, a blort audible over the hum of a morning show as a larger batch of runny poop landed in their pants.

"Oh fuck," they hissed, reliving their bladder too, creating a dark wet patch on the front of their sweats to match to one at the back. The thick, pee soaked fabric clung to their thighs, while at the back, the mess made it pull away from their skin.

Their tummy groaned angrily, bubbling under A's palm as their load came effortlessly, soft lumps stretching the puckered, swollen lips of their anus. The semi-solid masses were occasionally interrupted by waves of pure mush, making a sickly burbling sound as it joined the impressive load in their underwear, making it wetter and heavy. It felt like waves of thick, warm sludge was just steadily flowing out of them, as if a tap had been opened.

Eventually when A stood, they could still manage brief, packed toots, though, unless they wanted to risk the integrity of the sofa, they'd had to finish up in the bathroom.

That, was going on five days ago. Now, A has let go even further, eating whatever they want guiltlessly, making their pants double as their bathroom, regardless of wherever they are in the house, and showering only when whatever they're wearing threatens to leave telling stains on the furniture. It feels like they're living an absolute dream; a slobby, smelly dream. Though, in two days, its back to normal.

Two days, forty-eight hours, countless minutes. It's a ways away, so A figures that they can get away with their questionable hygiene and eating habits for a while longer, and with that in mind, they linger among the clutter they've created, sitting in their eggy stink with the television playing reruns of their favorite show, as they wait for dinner to arrive, a generous selection from the bar-b-que place a couple blocks away.

It's late, and while their latest pair of sweats is a bit tighter than usual because of the perpetual bloat they've acquired over the past few days and even a little stained from misjudging a couple farts, A's pants are mostly dry and somewhat clean. They've already decided that they won't give a shower too much thought until the next morning, and the evidence of their latest raid of the snack cabinet is littered around them. It feels like heaven, that is, until from down the hall, they hear keys jingling in the door.

And there's only one person beside them with a key. The other person that lives there, A's unassuming partner; B.

They're early!

"Shit," in the haste to stand up, the pressure on their on their pudgy tummy pushes out a rumbling fart, only worsening the stench in the room, and suddenly, what mere minutes ago felt like ultimate bliss feels like a cruel punishment. B can't see them like this.

"A?" A can hear the curiosity peaked in B's tone, and they know its because the musky odor has long travelled down the downstairs hall of their condo, "Baby what's-"

A desperately tries to greet B nearer to the door, and hopefully stall, before they can witness their unofficial base of operations, but they're too slow and they're just pushing aside some of the empty boxes and soda cans when B enters, one of their carry-on's slipping from their shoulder and falling onto the typically pristine marble floor, jaw hanging slack in surprise. Cautiously, B probes, "Did you have a party or something?"

With their already dodgy stomach knotting with nerves, A shakes their head; B probably gonna figure it out anyway. A hasn't even though about it at this point, but B pays all of the credit card bills, just one look at the next one is gonna give away what they'd planned on hiding. Really, it's best they just tell the truth. "No," A croaks, wringing their fingers in front of their distended tummy, squeezing their musky cheeks closed to keep a barrage of nervous gas at bay.

The shock on B's face is unwavering, and it takes a moment before they're finally able to muster up their next questions, "You ate all of this? This is...…all you?" A is just noticing the slight scrunch in B's nose, and it only fuels the fear that the end of their relationship is inevitable. Why would someone like B want to be with A, they think and there isn't a way in their mind that this is going to work.

"Yeah," A nods, embarrassed.

B seems like they're about to say something, but their thoughts are interrupted by a buzz on the intercom;

A's food is here.

And they have a lot to talk about

[softbtsickies]

Just deal

I said I wasn’t a writer because I wanted to keep this account separate from my Wattpad but I found this old draft that i was never ended up posting on wp but after reading it again Ig it’s not that bad and it’s grown on me a tiny bit so I decided why not. Hope it can be enjoyed <3

*Based on the vid*

♡Sickie: Taehyung

♡Caretaker: no one 😀

♡Tw: emeto, small mention of skipping meals all day and very light fluff and angst (if it can be considered) hurt no comfort, but with sickness instead

Taehyung breathed in deeply while repeating a mental chant of the same affirmation “You’re fine, You’re okay,” over and over again like he was some type of scratched CD, he wasn’t quite sure if it was a breath of convincing himself into a false relief or to push down the ever climbing pressure in his esophagus. He found it was best to nervously fiddle with the beading and cuffs of his sleeves as an act of ignorance to the feeling of a wave of stomach acid crashing inside him likewise to bubbling ocean, as it had been doing all day. Taehyung had made it through many concerts having an ‘upset tummy’ without upchucking all over the place, and he was determined to keep that track record running, even if it meant having to survive the day on a tiny amount of water and the littlest human interaction he had in years to preserve energy and to refrain from having his mouth open long enough for his stomach to take the window of opportunity to reject everything when talking. He moved onto rubbing his sweaty hands against his stage pants while the stylist continued to prick and prod at him, everything churning inside him picked up in pace as he realised how close the concert was getting to opening. The stylist finally backed away from him, at the same time one of the stage crew stood behind him looking at the both of them in the mirror. Taehyung straightened his posture up as much as he could to show the worker had his attention (there definitely being no ulterior motive of trying to stop the compression of his tummy.) “You coming out or staying in here to get some rest before the opening number?” Taehyung looked at himself one more time in the mirror, the stage make up perfectly covering his lack of wellness. “I’ll...” he had to clamp his mouth shut to sallow the airy belch that left the familiar taste of the last time he was sick in his mouth. He knew it would raise more concern and questions to stay behind instead of meeting up with his brothers, but the thought of being around seven noisy members and even louder workers made his head spin. He didn’t need to add a headache on top of a sour stomach. “I think I’ll just stay here for a while, thank you.” He could feel the air from swallowing flutter in his stomach again, to his luck, it not releasing any noise until after the stylist and crew worker left the green room. He waited till the door had been shut for a good ten seconds before scrunching one side of his face with a pained “ohhh,” hunching over to wrap his arms around his stomach. The organ curdled loudly under his hand when he put it under his shirt to rub away the nausea. He looked at himself one more time, his face now morphed into a hurt pouted, and he raised to his feet. One finale attempt to feel better, he gently tapped on his belly to get one more burp out in hopes to ease the tension inside and made his way to find his spot backstage.

Pretending he was fine while performing was something that years of experience helped him perfect, but it never stopped the constant panic that at any moment would end up puking in front of thousands of the viewing eye, this could not be his next viral moment. His tummy had been quietly gurgling under the music the whole performance, and he probably was noticeably sloppy even laggy during the choreography sections, but apparently luck had favoured him as, soon enough, the lights dimmed, calling for a short break and instead of following the rest of his members to the green room, he changed his way to the bathroom instead and locked himself into the first stall in there. Tae stood over the toilet, hand massaging his stomach again until it made a sick rumble at the bottom of his middle, travelling upwards, making the floor of his mouth pool with saliva. Now being seconds away from vomiting, he realised his two bug mistakes of the day. Number one being the regret of not telling anyone. Why does he always play this game? Why doesn’t he bury the insecurity of opening up about his sickness and stop messing everything up when he finally gets caught?Questioning himself leads to the yearning of wanting someone to hold his hair, maybe pat his back or rub his tummy until and tell him everything is fine, it turns his eyes damp. The other mistake, not being revealed until his throat is starting to close and open up while his breathing is becoming more rapid and uncontrollable. It hits Taehyung that he had gotten away without eating a bite the whole day and now that his body thinks there’s something to expel, all it has to work with is plain vile. “Oh uh.” He hiccups into his fist, stomach finally jerking. Leaving no time to ponder on any more regrets, his body forced him to bend at the waist while something acidic poured out of his mouth. The second wave came with no warning and this time his legs stumbled to hold him up and a hand slammed onto the wall to keep his balance. Having a quick break, Taehyung rushed to his knees, one arm gripping the bowl the other hugging himself while his belly began to clench, looking for anything else it can bring up. He went through a couple more rounds of productivity until it was physical impossible to vomit anything else up. There was still a heavy churning inside him, and he knew this was just the beginning, however there wasn’t time to cry about how much pain the ordeal caused him or to get his breathing back to normal. From the bathroom he could still hear the cheers of thousands of army waiting to see him again. He would have to and pretend everything was fine, even if his voice would probably sound like shit from burning with acid.

He would just have to deal.

[xxkinkyskunkxx]

Do you have any gas/scat/stomach ache headcanons for Bruno, by chance?

Hiiii! First of all, thanks for sending this my way. I love getting asks sm! I apologize that it took a while though. Second of all, of course I do!🖤🤍

I’m going to do this in the order you said! There’ll be a blocker between each prompt in case anyone reading would like to skip over one and just to organize hehe.

[ CW for eproctophilia, coprophilia and stomach aches! ]

Bruno has a pretty basic diet, just eating what he pleases and not often worrying about repercussions. He doesn’t avoid things because he knows they’ll give him a bit of gas.

One thing that does give him trouble and he will actively however is tofu and imitation meats. (Canon? Maybe...this is on his character info card in the manga).

Growing up in a family that was farm to table style of cooking made him a bit sensitive to anything highly processed.

When he does get gas, it isn’t too awful in scent, but his farts are deep and rumbly. It’s mostly just air trapped in his gut, but boy they can be embarrassing.

Speaking of loud and embarrassing, his guts in general have a tendency of being very loud. If you have a meeting with Bruno, you will know if he had skipped breakfast beforehand or if he’s having tummy issues.

He’s fairly thin, so when he gets bloated, it is very much noticeable. It just slightly strains his suit and unzipping it at the end of the day when he’s having tummy troubles is so good.

When he needs to pass gas, Bruno tries to sit on soft cushions or pillows. The sound is the worst part of the ordeal, and soft things help muffle the brassy farts that come from him. With his gas trapped deep in the fabric, it makes the smell much stronger and very much noticeable.

Meetings with Polpo always result in a night of gas after joining the Capo in greasy pizza, snacks and wine. He always leaves the prison bloated and crop dusting on his way home to his Squad’s base.

After those meetings, Bruno is prone to needing to go ASAP. He always needs to go mid-meal when he’s had his meal, which usually results in some leg bouncing under the table. Desert is sometimes a dread.

His BMs are usually long, deep brown, soft snakes that are usually easy to pass.

He has some pretty loud farts between the different pieces, and it’s pretty embarrassing because he can’t hide them in a pillow like usual, and it’s instead amplified in the porcelain bowl.

Because of his mostly healthy diet, the smell is pretty vile, and you can definitely tell when he was in the bathroom last.

As much as he loves them, espressos go right through him! Coffee in general is a hit or miss for whether or not it will make his trip to the bathroom Hell or not.

Bruno is usually pretty quick using the restroom. He’s very busy with his duties and doesn’t have much time to spare. Plus, he gets a bit embarrassed knowing that people may be assuming he’s going number 2.

He grunts softly as he goes, shutting his eyes and relaxing. It’s a bit hard for a man in his power to relax, so that’s basically the toughest part of his BMs.

Bruno is not one to show discomfort (we watched him hide being a zombie after all).

As mentioned before, his tummy is not afraid to tell him and everyone around him when it’s upset with loud gurgles and rumbles.

Because he’s so good at hiding his tummy issues, you can basically tell he’s having an upset when he starts subtlety kneading his tummy.

Opening his suit when he’s bloated causes a big sigh of relief, he’ll sit back and just relax after a long day of being bloated once he gets to unwind and relax his suit.

Bruno is very sensitive to bad foods. If he gets food poisoning, it will never get past his stomach. It’s coming out the front end, not the back.

You know he’s struggling when he burps and belches, he literally never does this unless he’s having a real bad tummy ache.

His burps end in small groans of relief, and he usually sits back and relaxes after especially big ones.

He doesn’t usually let people cuddle up too close with him and show his vulnerable side, but he can really feel a lot of relief from a simple tummy rub.

Bruno is not one to seek comfort from others, but if you cuddle him and gently rub his taut belly, he will soon relax in your grasp and accept the love.

[dreams-of-the-arcana]

Loosely based on this prompt! Tikos discovers an unexpected treasure one day!

Pairing: Kassamatik (Kassim Atesh @kassim-walks-on-air, Amaranth Silva @xvi-the-tower, and Tikos)

Warnings: Massive amounts of tooth rotting fluff, mentions of abandonment

In The Woods

“Uh, Kassim? Amaranth? Are you home? Helloooo.”

Tikos Katsaros-Yakinthos’ low voice called out as he opened the door to the trio's cottage. A small bundle held in his arms definitely resembled the shirt he’d left in. Which he was currently missing.

Kass and Ama appeared curiously and concerned. Tikos never used anything but nicknames unless it was important. Just hearing their real names coming from him was enough to put the two on guard.

“Ti? What’s wrong?” Amaranth quickly looked him over for wounds. Her golden eyes moved rapidly.

Kassim carefully reached out to place a hand on Tikos bare arm. Their eyes drew down to the bundle, it was his shirt but nestled in it...

“A baby!?”

The forest was not Tikos normal route home but he hoped that the side track would be worth it. Ilya had mentioned a patch of rare flowers appearing near the path when they’d met earlier for a drink. While Ilya was more interested in describing the medicinal properties, Tikos’ first thought was that his loves deserved a bouquet of beautiful rare flowers. Though as he walked through the steadily darkening forest he remembered why he stuck to the sea.

“Roots! Holes! Με δουλεύεις!* How do people do this to relax?” He muttered to himself as he tripped over another rock on the path.

It’d been a long time since he cursed the mob that stole his eye but he offered up a mean thought about boils and uncomfortable sitting for them. The lack of depth perception usually didn’t bother him because out at sea he compensated with his magic but the trees of the forest interfered with the air. He was about to give up when a flash of color caught his eye.

“Finally,” he muttered.

Quickly he moved towards it expecting to finally get his hands on those flowers. Or maybe run into some bandits. A beast, even. He readied his dagger. At that point he’d happily welcome anything to relieve the tension of his little hike. Something!

... except a baby sleeping soundly inside a hollowed out tree stump.

“Uh...”

After a thorough look around the area in case it was a trap, he quickly stashed the dagger back in its sheath and moved closer. Nestled amongst the moss was a baby with dark pink hair and sparkly rosy cheeks. His brown eye widened and his mind started spinning.

“Μα καλά, τι σκεφτόσουν?!* Who would leave a baby out here? What kind of parents do you have? Oh what are we going to do.”

“And so we waited for a bit longer to see if anyone came back but I couldn’t let them stay out there all night. Even with me there,” Tikos finished telling his story.

Kassim and Amaranth had taken the baby from him and sat with them on a soft rug near the fireplace. They’d recovered from the shock quickly and dived directly into protective mode. First insisting on keeping the baby warm and then properly fed. Tikos looked on from the kitchen where he prepared a bottle of milk.

“I’ll go back in the morning and maybe leave Kiki as a look-out. No one’s getting a baby back until we have a discussion.”

He shook his head at the idea of parents just leaving their baby in the middle of the forest. Who knew how long they’d been out there before he’d come along. Even worse, how long would they have stayed out there if he hadn’t taken the detour.

“Here μικρή γλαύξ,” Tikos said as he handed the bottle over to Kassim.

They picked up the baby and sat back so they could rest the baby in their arms to eat. A soft smile graced their lips as the babe eagerly took the bottle.

“Oh I know that look,” Amaranth looked at the scene and teased. “Pretty cute baby, hm?”

Kassim blushed and focused on the baby.

”Just wondering who could leave such a precious thing.”

“Someone who either had no choice or doesn’t deserve their baby back,” Tikos grumbled. “Don’t worry, we’ll get to the bottom of it and make sure they’re safe. Desperation can make people do things that seem cruel or odd on the outside but made sense at the time.”

He slid down to sit behind Amaranth and let his legs rest on either side of her then pulled her against his chest. His mind hadn’t stopped racing since he’d found the baby but finally relaxed knowing the three of them were doing this together now. Everything seemed better when he had them close.

Ama curled up close and the two watched Kassim and the baby quietly for a moment. It made for such a domestic scene.

The fireplace lit up the area with a warm glow as Kassim gracefully sat with this strange baby. Adoration was plain across their face at the bundle in their arms and the babe stared back with an equally content look. Curiously it looked as though their cheeks were sparkling even more now but it could just be the firelight. They’d swapped Tikos’ thin shirt for a mismatch of fabrics and clothes they could get to fit then topped it off by swaddling the babe in a clean blanket. When the bottle was done Kassim gently lifted them up to pat their back. Small burps sounded from them which only made the adults melt inside. While doing that they finally met their lovers eyes.

“What?” They asked but the deepening blush gave them away. “Um... what do... what do you think we should call them...?”

“I think it’s a little early for that, darling.” Amaranth cautioned.

Tikos and Kassim nodded. It was hard to not fall in love with the baby immediately but getting too attached would just make the separation harder. They all had to remember this baby had a family and could be missed at that very moment.

“I’ll fix up a drawer or something as a cot. That way they’ll be safe and can sleep next to our bed.”

Tikos offered and got up to start working on it. Kassim and Amaranth just smiled at each other, they knew it was already too late for their husband.

Tikos stared down at the forest floor in disbelief. There in the dirt was his arrow marker he’d left just the night before. But now it pointed directly to a small sapling in the ground.

”So... this was... a tree yesterday?”

Tikos pinched the bridge of his nose to try and tide the growing headache.

“Yes, a fully mature tree stump that was hollow. It was filled with moss! The whole baby was in it and not even touching the edges!”

Kassim inspected the sapling closely, nothing indicated it was recently planted. By their knowledge the sapling looked to be a good two or three years old. They looked around at the trees nearby but nothing fit the description.

”Are you... are you sure, vehana? I know you can get turned around out here and your depth perception magic gets confused...”

Tikos huffed slightly and looked away, he didn’t like to acknowledge any weaknesses but coming from Kassim he knew it was well-intentioned.

“I know, μικρή γλαύξ. I made sure to mark the right one, triple checked.”

Kassim nodded, if he was confident that he checked then they believed him.

“There’s something in the air here... it’s faint though...”

“I did feel something strange last night. It’s why I was eager to get the babe home. I thought I could just come back again but I wouldn’t let them sit around any longer... forests are weird.”

Tikos crouched down in front of the sapling. Conflicting emotions flickered through his eye.

“You sprung up quick, aye? Straight from the dying tree...”

Weeks had passed since Tikos’ discovery in the woods. No one came to claim the baby in the time so the trio decided to keep her until someone did. They let the captain of the guard know and got everything sorted out. It was left unspoken that the longer time went on the less likely the baby’s family would show up. The Captain was content to leave the babe in their care, he knew they would love and care for her as if she was their own.

“Γεια*, Seffy, Firebug, μικρή γλαύξ! Who’s home?”

Tikos' voice sounded throughout the cottage as he walked in. Laughter answered him and led him into the family room where he found the three of them.

“Welcome home, darling!” Amaranth managed through giggles.

He leaned against a doorframe in the room. Kassim and Amaranth sat on the floor with baby Persephone between them, wiggling happily. Toys and entertainment covered the area and was quickly becoming the new normal for them. Persephone, as they decided to call her, had captivated them all nearly immediately. It started slow with someone bringing home a new outfit or moving something out because it had hard corners then before they knew it, she was everywhere. Bottles lined their kitchen, pieces of cloth were strategically placed around in case of a spitty baby, and the drawer turned cot was a permanent fixture by their bed. Tikos even started sleeping on the end closest to Persephone since he slept so lightly. Any noise of discomfort or discontent woke him up right away. Oftentimes Ama and Kass would wake up to find him spread out as usual but with a hand draped over in her cot. They teased him incessantly but he just smiled and said he worried she’d get lonely.

Persephone giggled away as Amaranth and Kassim were taking turns playing peekaboo. Her cheeks sparkled still, they’d quickly realized it really was her sparkling and not a trick of the light. It was a pretty clear sign that she was happy and also not an entirely normal child.

Tikos walked over to give all three of them a soft kiss before taking a seat. Persephone wriggled and reached out towards him excitedly from Amaranth’s arms.

“Oh look who’s happy. Do you want to go to Μπαμπάς*, darling?”

They all froze at that.

Ama touched her fingers to her lips in disbelief. Only Persephone was unfazed and continued to reach for Tikos. A small rare blush bloomed on his tanned freckled skin.

“Ti, I... I didn’t... uh-“

“No, it’s... it’s alright actually. I... I think I could get used to it, aye?”

Kassim and Amaranth beamed as he took Persephone.

“What do you think, Seffy? Can I be your Μπαμπάς? If so, what will we call your other parents?”

He flashed his signature cheeky grin at his lovers who both suddenly shared his blush. None of them could have anticipated how one little detour would turn out. Not even Asra predicted that the hunt for some flowers would turn into finding something so much more precious: a family.

** Με δουλεύεις - Are you kidding me?

Μα καλά, τι σκεφτόσουν - What were you thinking?!

Γεια - Hello

Μπαμπάς - Dad

[jessicajonesrp]

Family reunion

Jessica, texting Luke: who the hell let a Phillip Jones in the building

Jessica: if it’s Trish she’s way more fucking blonde than I thought

 Luke texting back: Que? What the heck are you talking about woman and since when did I become your doorman?

Jessica: PHILLIP JONES FUCK HELLOOOO

 Luke not having a clue what’s going on just calls her.

 “What are you talking about, am I suppose to know this person?? Seriously how am I supposed to know what the hell you’re talking about Jessica?”

 Jessica is talking very rapidly, her breaths shallow as she answers, pacing back and forth.

 “My fucking brother, that’s who. The one dead 16 years now? Only not because he just left my office. Probably he did anyway, since I opened the window and jumped out of it after my whole fucking world imploded.”

 “Oh your brother….Ooohh your dead brother?? Now your insane rantings make sense now..Shit Jessica I’m at a lost of words right now..What are you going to do?”

 Jessica laughs, but it sounds far from humorous. “I don’t fucking know, I kinda just freaked out and bolted. It isn’t a ghost, and it was him, as soon as he said it I could tell it was. They said he was dead, why the fuck would they tell me that, and where the fuck has he been all this time?”

 “Wait backup, you jumped out your window? And why would someone lie about him being dead? I think I have as many questions as you do.“

  Jessica is still pacing the rooftop. “I mean, it was open already. The window. I dont know, but I’m definitely awake right? This is real? This isn’t….I don’t, another fucking hallucination thing?”

 “Well I don’t know baby, how about you go back and crazy thinking here..Talk to him! Make sure he’s not some crazy fanboy..Do your detective thing..Get his fingerprints and some DNA, if he’s telling the truth, he shouldn’t object to proving it. I’ll wrap up things here and come to your office..And if he’s a nut, let’s just be happy you didn’t work from home today.”

 “Whatever, you don’t have to,” Jessica muttered, exhaling. “I got it. I’ll go back and see if he’s still there. Hell, if he really is Phillip, he’s waited sixteen years to show himself, he can wait ten minutes for me.”

 “You sure? Cause twenty…thirty minutes top and I could be there..I’m mean if you got family out there I’d like to meet them.” Looking down at his desk at the pile of boring papers. “Honestly I could use the break, I’m sooooo damn bored! We should have stayed on our honeymoon longer.”

 Jessica huffed another breath, shaking her hair back from her face. “I’m stopping by the liquor store first, then I’ll go back. I mean…I guess it could be a trick, or some of my crazy head games with myself. But.. What if it isn’t? He looks like him. Like He would have looked.”

 “Come on Jessica if it is your brother do you really want his first impression of you as a person that jumped out her own office window and his second you’re drunk off your ass, Look I’ll bring home a bottle of the good stuff but go back a face him with your wits intact.”

8

It was a good point. Fuck it, why did Luke always have to talk logic when Jessica was ready to run away and shove aside anything that tried to stop her or make her feel?

 “Well, it wouldn’t be all that surprising to him, since his last impression of me before showing up on my doorstop was how I caused the accident that killed our parents because I wouldn’t let him have a fucking video game,” she muttered, and damn if her eyes aren’t getting a little wet.

 It’s something that she’s always harbored, and never voiced aloud before, that it is her belief that she is the reason that her family had died. She had been too selfish, too loud, too much of a bitch, she hadn’t shared with her little brother and had made her father angry, she was the reason he took his eyes off the road. If it wasn’t for her, it never would have happened, her family would still be alive.

 She had always pushed those beliefs far down; Dorothy certainly hadn’t encouraged her to talk about her family, and Trish had always been so tentative around the subject, not wanting to hurt or anger her, that it had become far too easy to blank out memories or feelings about them for someone already inclined to repress anything too painful. Now, the possibility was presenting itself that for all these years, she had actually had a little brother out there, orphaned because of her, needing her, maybe not knowing what had happened to her. Or had he? Had he known all along that his sister had been adopted by a celebrity, while he was left behind, and she was told that he was dead?

 “Fucking Dorothy,” Jessica muttered, more to herself than to Luke, because whatever had happened all these years to her brother, she was almost sure Dorothy Walker’s hand was somewhere in the mix. In response to Luke, she said begrudgingly, “Fine, I’m going back. I’ll show up sober, but no promises I’ll stay that way once I’m there.”

 Hanging up, she ran a shaking hand over her face, fighting to slow the escalation of her breathing. She manages to stave off enough anxiety to avoid a panic attack, even as memories flicker through her mind. Waking up at fifteen in the hospital bed, frightened, in pain, wanting nothing more than to see her parents’ face, only to overhear the angry voice of teenaged Trish, blurting out that all of her family is dead. Asking about funerals, about memorials or any sort of service she could take part in, only to be told that those had already taken place, that she had missed them all, and there was not so much gravestones for her to visit instead. Picturing her family cremated, as Dorothy had so blithely told her, decimated into pieces small enough that they would all together fit in a small box or vase.

 If Phillip was alive, then whose body had they cremated? Or was even that a lie? Were her parents still alive out there somewhere too?

 Hope mingled with dread as Jessica started jumping rooftops, making her way back to her office building’s. She swung herself back down inside the open window, unsure whether she was relieved or not when she saw immediately that the man who had introduced himself as her brother was still present inside, now sitting somewhat uncomfortably on her beaten couch.

 “I figured you had to come back some time,” he muttered, not acknowledging the fact that her rather nontraditional entrance through the window. After her exit out of it, perhaps he expected that she preferred using it to doors. “Even if you do run your own business, you’ve gotta touch base at office eventually.”

 Jessica didn’t move any closer towards him, even when he stood, angling his body to face hers. Leaning back against the window, as though prepared to make another hasty exit if needed, she crossed her arms over her chest, narrowing her eyes at him.

 “So you’re my brother,” she said flatly, eyes looking towards his forehead, rather than the hazel eyes that so closely matched her own. “Prove it.”

 “What do you want, my birth certificate, my DNA?” Phillip shrugged, sounding unsurprised. “I could get both or either. Mouth swabs can do the trick these days. But I’m guessing you’re wanting words. Well, let’s see, my middle name is Brian, after Dad, but I guess anyone could look that one up. Your middle name is Campbell, after Mom’s maiden name. I know anyone could look that one up too, but what they couldn’t look up is you used to hate it, because I would call you Campbell soup, to the point that you wouldn’t eat any kind of soup at all, even if it wasn’t actually Campbell brand.”

 Jessica’s eyes widened, and she tried to cover her shock by pressing her lips together in a thin line. Phillip wasn’t finished. He seemed to actually enjoy throwing some of the old, mostly forgotten information about her long ago history back towards her.

 “Hm, you used to watch Xena the Warrior Princess a lot, you wanted to dress like her for Halloween but Dad didn’t want you wearing the skimpy costume, so you were a ninja turtle instead. I think that was when you were maybe eleven? You lost a tooth when you were nine on the playground because you were trying to do a full flip on the monkey bars and bashed your mouth against a bar instead. I was crying, scared because of all the blood, but you didn’t even cry. You were just mad because Mom made us leave and wouldn’t let you try again.”

 Jessica couldn’t speak. She tried, but her throat was closed up, and she couldn’t seem to form words or thoughts. Everything Phillip was recounting was true, memories she hadn’t touched in nearly two decades, and as they flooded back vividly, she stood frozen between pain and hope.

 “Uh…oh, you had some troll dolls, and I hated them, because their eyes and those weird little jewels in their belly buttons glowed in the dark. So of course, you used to sneak them into my room and hide them in my bed or in a dresser drawer or something, just to make me scream. And of course, I did my part by waking you up when you were a teenager by burping or farting in your face, then running for my life.”

 Phillip chuckled slightly, then intensified the easy, laidback tone of his voice, taking a slow step forward. “Take the DNA test if you want, Jessica, but you have to know it’s me. Don’t you.”

 And she did. She knew before he said any of it, knew as soon as he identified himself aloud the first time. This was her brother. Her brother….alive.

 “You’re not dead,” she said aloud, her voice small and dry. “They said you were dead.”

 Phillip shrugged, one side of his mouth tipping up in a smirk, very similar to one Jessica’s own face often showed.

 “Guess news of my demise was greatly exaggerated then.” More seriously, he said, “Technically, I guess I did die, they had to shock me back a few times, or so I hear. But in the long run, I survived. And I’m here. I wanted to see you, Jessie. Once I could find you, and get to you….I wanted to see my sister.”

 Jessie. The name sounded different in his mouth than it did in Dorothy’s, or any of the other people who insisted on saying it and whom Jessica refused to accept it from. She had thought the only three people allowed to call her by her childhood name were long gone, and the privilege to do so gone with them. But this man, this person with her brother’s features on a grown man’s face, called her Jessie so easily and naturally, and it sounded right.

  In a few jerky steps Jessica came forward, putting her arms around Phillip in an awkward but intense embrace. They had been fifteen and ten the last time they saw each other, and their relationship ship been far from one that showed physical affection; any physical contact with each other generally involved pinching, slaps, and shoves. It felt strange and strained to touch someone so familiar and yet so unknown, but as Phillip put his arms around her in return, with almost equal levels of awkwardness, his responding lack of ease only intensified her knowledge that he was the real deal.

 “Ease up, Jess,” he said lightly, flinching slightly. “Not all of us have super strength.”

 When Jessica jerked back, eyeing him, he shrugged at her. “What, how else do you think I found you? You were on the news constantly after that mind control guy, and everyone going crazy trying to kill each other. And then Dowling Investigations ads, it might be Trish Walker’s face, but she says your name and your title, and everyone in the world with any sort of TV or radio access knows you’re her adopted sister. Yeah, there are like, a million Jessica Joneses, and I didn’t know if you’d stay in New York or not earlier, but once the mind control guy happened, and Trish talking about you on her show, it wasn’t that hard to find you. I just…kind of took a while to get up the balls to actually go to you.”

 He shrugged again, giving her a somewhat self conscious smile. “I guess now that we’re here, we have to get to know each other all over again. We’ve kind of spent more time living apart than together, you know? A lot can happen in sixteen years.”

 He was right on that. And truthfully, Jessica had no idea where to start, so she focused back on him.

 “So if you weren’t dead all this time…where have you been? What the hell happened?”

[cutieodonoghue]

dark gray (5/?)

summary: Killian Jones operates a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere, preferring a life of isolation, until one day a woman and a baby wash up on his little island and change his life forever.

read it on: ao3, ff.net

and also catch up on tumblr!

///

Five

Killian comes into the room three times in the night when Henry cries.

His exhaustion is mirrored in Emma's own miserable appearance, sagging eyes and lips pressed together tightly without any need for communication.

He sits in the chair under the window next to the fireplace and she tries not to notice the way his hair sticks up in every direction as he threads a hand through it with his gaze lazy on the flickering fire.

Henry needs to be changed after his third feeding and Emma winces as she lays him down on her legs to do the work.

Emma just fastens the pin on the side with practiced ease and she pulls his little outfit on as snugly as it will fit before taking the boy into her arms and allowing him to play with her finger as she waits for him to drift off.

She nearly falls asleep herself, sitting up in the bed, but Henry doesn't feel like sleeping and she can't just put him down like this, so she drops her shoulders low.

"Can you just go to sleep?" She's begging and Henry just blinks his big brown eyes at her. She sighs.

"Do you know any songs?" Killian asks, voice thick with sleep.

Emma shakes her head, looking over at him. "You don't have to stay here, you know. You can go back to sleep. He's just going to stay up until he's ready."

He shakes his head and stands, pulling the chair to the edge of the bed. He plunks back down and takes a breath.

"I haven't sung in a long while," he tells her, clearing his throat a little. He braces himself with another breath. "So pardon my pitch."

Emma tilts her head to the side in mild curiosity, a swelling of surprise in her belly. "Believe me, I have no judgment. I can't sing for my life."

He smiles the smallest bit, almost shyly, and Emma looks down at Henry before Killian starts in, low and deep.

His voice is beautiful and stunning to say the least. She hasn't heard anything like it, and the song he's singing is equally as such. It's a song about a man calling for his lost love at sea. She thinks it's probably a song that he used to hear at some point in his past.

He sings with passion and she keeps her gaze fixed on Henry's tiny face while he drifts off peacefully. He's asleep before the song is finished, but Killian keeps singing anyway.

They sit in silence for a few moments once he finishes singing.

Turning to him, Emma intentionally meets his eyes. "That was beautiful."

Killian smiles slightly. "My brother Liam used to sing it to me when I was afraid of the storms."

She smiles at that, finding herself genuinely interested in his past. Interested in the fact that he used to be afraid of thunderstorms. Interested in who he used to be, and of what happened to lead him here.

She finds herself suddenly wide awake, wanting to sit up for the rest of the night discussing themselves.

But at the same time, she knows it wouldn't be right. They're still just acquaintances and when she leaves him, she'll never see him again, so it isn't as if there needs to be a relationship here.

Emma hands Henry off to Killian so he can settle the boy into his crib. He stays sitting there in silence for a few moments with her, so she thinks he must want to talk.

She's not good at this, but she manages to find something to say.

"Did you lose him?"

He stares at her and then looks down at his lap, lip going between his teeth. He struggles for a second or two. "Aye."

Emma closes her eyes. "I'm so sorry."

He scoffs, sitting up straight and running his hand over his head. "Don't apologize, love. No one ever sticks around, do they? Death is inevitable. I made my peace with that a long time ago."

He shoves himself up onto his feet and returns the chair to its spot. She watches him, the way his features have darkened with the obvious pent-up anger over this topic.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He pauses where he's standing by the door and glances over his shoulder. "Not entirely."

"Okay."

He leaves the room after a second at the door and she sees his hand clench up into a fist before falling to his side on his way out.

She wonders if she'll ever figure him out.

There are so many layers, she's beginning to see now, and if she doesn't figure out what he's about now, she probably never will. It's odd that she wants to, because she's had a life of messy relationships and idiots and people who claimed they wanted her but never did.

Wanting to learn about someone else is unsettling. So maybe she shouldn't want that.

Maybe she shouldn't wonder about what Killian Jones' history looks like, about who he lost and who he's hiding from. Maybe she shouldn't want to help him see that living alone on this island is doing more harm than good.

It's evident already that he doesn't care much for himself. She can't say much for his grooming standards, but based on the amount of cleaning she'd done, it's obvious that a part of Killian is careless and hopeless, as if he doesn't want his life to be long-lived.

She can't think of anything sadder, really. Living on this island, in this house, for another fifty years- into his old age? That sounds like it would kill him faster than anything.

People aren't meant to live alone. If there's something she's learned in the past few years of living with David and Mary Margaret, it's that.

It's probably a matter of time before it all comes crumbling down for him and she hopes with bated breath that it isn't while she's still here with him.

/

In the morning, Emma is greeted by the sound of Henry's hungry cry and a groan from the other side of the wall.

After a few moments, Killian enters the room and hands the baby to her. He looks exhausted, as if his sleep had been restless. Hers had been, too.

Henry's cries soften as soon as she holds him, but he still needs comfort, and she hums a little to him, muttering the words under her breath as she strokes over his hair and cheeks.

She bites her lip when Killian comes back into the room with the bottle in his hand.

Emma takes it from him and starts to feed Henry while Killian sits at the foot of the bed. He runs a hand over his face and sighs. "How does your leg feel?"

She shrugs. "A little better, I guess."

He smiles a tiny bit and nods. "Good. I'll get you some ice." Killian pauses and, as if he remembers something important, he tells her, "Snowed this morning."

Emma's eyes widen. "What? Are you serious?"

Killian chuckles and nods. She looks toward the window and finds that it's fogged over in a white sheen and she laughs.

"Can I go outside and see it?"

He shrugs. "Suppose so."

Emma smiles at him excitedly. He seems curious, with the way his eyes shine back at her, and how tentatively stretched his smile is.

She's oddly really happy. The idea of snow brings back memories of real life, where she belongs, and they sit warm in her chest. Clearly, Killian can sense that, though he stares at her like she's being silly.

"Sorry. I just…" Emma shakes her head. "It's just that the first snow of the year, my mom has this tradition that we do."

She pauses, a smile filling her face from ear to ear. She can practically hear her mother's bright voice in her ears.

"She says that the first coat of snow is the most magical and we usually bottle some up and leave it in our freezer until Christmas Eve. Then we'd sprinkle it in our stockings because she says the magic in the snow would bring even more happiness than Santa could ever bring."

He smiles at her explanation, a genuine one, his teeth showing and sparkling in the early morning light.

Her own smile fades as she looks down at Henry, realizing that her parents have no idea where she is and no clue of how to find her. She hasn't even tried to contact them.

Is there even a way to do that?

They might think she's dead and that definitely makes her heart ache, because she knows that they love her more than she thinks is even possible and losing her would absolutely drive them to the brink of insanity.

"Were you with your parents when you fell from the ship?" Killian asks, suddenly pulling her back to reality.

"Yeah," she smiles a little, shaking her head. "We were on the way back home from England. My parents thought it would be fun to take a ship across the Atlantic instead of flying." Emma sighs, laughing a little with bitterness. "It was our Six Year Gotcha Day vacation."

"Gotcha Day?"

Emma lifts her eyebrows. "Yeah. It's silly… I was adopted. We were celebrating my adoption day."

Killian nods in understanding. "Ah."

Henry finishes eating and she tucks the bottle down beside her while she lifts him to burp him, the cloth she'd used all night draped across her shoulder while she gently pats his back.

Killian has an unreadable look on his face, which isn't much of a surprise.

"They celebrate everything," she tells him. "They would celebrate a good day at school if they had the time." A slightly bigger smile fills his lips at the idea. Emma frowns again, longing to see her parents at the forefront of her mind. "Do you have, like, a radio or something? So that we can get word to them that I'm okay?"

He looks hesitant for a moment, squinting one eye in a painful sort of way. "I- I may've smashed it in a drunken stupor."

She opens her mouth and nods slowly. He cringes, pressing a hand to his forehead.

"In about four weeks the supplies will come. Then you'll be free to leave. He should have all of the necessary equipment back on the mainland."

Emma furrows her brow. "How far away are you from the mainland?"

He shakes his head. "About forty-five miles."

She hums, tilting her head curiously. "Why don't you have a boat, then?"

His gaze turns dark and he shifts his eyes away from her, looking down at his lap. She feels a stirring of past emotions bubbling forward, as if it's all too painful for him, and he pushes off of the bed, stalking toward the door before spinning around.

"I don't operate sea craft any longer." It's all he says, but she sees the pain in his eyes and it makes her wonder yet again what exactly happened to him.

Again, she finds herself watching him walk away from her knowing just a little bit more and a whole lot less about him than when their conversation first began.

Emma bites her lip and glances down at Henry as she sets him down in her arms. "Well, Henry, what do you think? What do we do today?"

Henry gurgles and makes adorable noises, a toothless grin filling his face for a moment. She laughs.

"You'd better be glad you're cute, otherwise I don't think I would like being woken up so much at night." She laughs again when he makes a vocalization. "Oh, really?"

Emma pokes his nose and he closes his eyes. His smile widens.

She wonders where he comes from and who his parents are, wonders if they know he's missing, and if they're looking for him.

She sighs as she cradles him tighter to her chest. He certainly would be missed if he was hers.

"Emma, I've got to go check on the lighthouse," Killian comes back into the room. She looks at him with wide eyes. "So if you want to try and move around, I'll come back in about an hour or so and help you."

Emma nods. "Okay."

He walks closer to her, putting a bowl of something down on the nightstand.

"Do you think he'll need another bottle?"

She shakes her head. "No, but if you could grab another one of those diaper cloths, that would be good."

Killian nods and then whisks himself out of the room. Emma looks over at what he's left for her and smiles a tiny bit because he's left her a bowl of oatmeal.

Emma smiles down at Henry. "He might think he's tough, but I think he's a real softie inside, Henry. There's no need to be scared of Killian."

A half second later, the man waltzes back into the room with one of the diaper cloths and a roll of bandages. He holds them out purposefully.

"For your forehead, if you'd like to replace the bandages."

Emma softens. "Oh. Um, yeah. Thank you."

He nods and then leans in close to her, focusing intently on the gash on her forehead. She had only had a quick look at the residue during her cleaning, the blood seeping through the bandage and coloring it a light shade of brown.

She bites her lip as he pulls the tape off. "So you were in the Navy. Were you a doctor?"

He scoffs. "Not by a long shot." He grabs the roll of medical tape and uses his teeth to tear away a square. It's a practiced motion, as if he's done it a lot. "But with time, you learn how to pull off simple fixes."

Emma hums. He applies more tape to her forehead. His fingers brush against her eyebrow, as if he's examining her, and she finds his eyes in an instant that sucks the breath straight from her lungs.

"There we are." Killian says, voice low and gentle.

He doesn't move away from her. She can feel his breath, warm against her cheek, and the longer she stares into his eyes, the more she wants to understand him.

The brush of his fingertips slows to a gentle caress that shouldn't feel as meaningful as it does.

She sees the moment he recognizes the intimacy of the moment, of sensing just how close they are. It hits her all at once, too, and she allows herself to release a soft, shaking breath as soon as he stands upright.

His eyes fall away from her and he straightens his shoulders. "I'd better get going."

She rolls her eyes as he backs away from her. He turns the caretaker switch off and on again so easily that it's a wonder she's still breathing.

"Thanks."

She doesn't say it, but she means to say thank you for everything. For singing Henry to sleep, for saving them when he could've let the water drown them, and for caring when he obviously isn't built for it.

He nods. "Not a problem, Emma."

[hgfstreamchats]

The BFG

thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:43 PM Hello! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:43 PM Is There A High Thursday Picture Show Gloss? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:43 PM Hello, and there is! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:43 PM

Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:44 PM Hiya!! What's the movie? mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:44 PM and or possibly game highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:45 PM The BFG. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:45 PM OOO Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:45 PM Ohhh!! I love that one!! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:46 PM Oh!  That's a fun one mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:46 PM never even heard of it but i want GIVE highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:46 PM Then you're in for a ride. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:46 PM i wish i had nitro

mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:47 PM hullo concept: gloss that gets you high Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:49 PM I think that's just certain types of varnish. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:49 PM Oh it has the reduced quality warning already, a good sign mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:49 PM ugh my wifi is bad rn highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:52 PM Picture, sound, yes, no? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:52 PM dsfngsdjfgnsdf it tells me you're not even sharing your screen Aha! PICTURE And sound!! YESSSSS highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:53 PM Glorious! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:53 PM Working alright! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:54 PM so what IS this Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Wait.... this isn't the movie I know at all! There's another one? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Oh yes! You thought this was the coherent one? Not a chance. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:54 PM Oho!  So it's not the recent one? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:54 PM It's based off a book by the guy who wrote Charlie and the Chocolate Factory The new one is COHERENT? THEN WHAT IS THIS GONNA BE highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:55 PM Well, I for one am very excited about this.

Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:55 PM same, tbh (For you, this must be a horror movie opening... because Owl) highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:55 PM Off to a horrific start. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:55 PM Is the owl going to take someone on a MAGICAL ADVENTURE? mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:56 PM Okay is it just QUIET or am i not hearing it at all thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:56 PM and/or steal their sibling? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:56 PM There's soft music mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:56 PM I'm having to turn my volume up a bit much to properly hear like, even the dialog Sharpwing — Yesterday at 9:56 PM ....I can't understand a word they're saying, but there is in fact sound, for me highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:57 PM Better? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:58 PM Ohhhh this is on youtube?  Could I have the link?  The actual stream's kinda... jerky for me.  Keep having to stop watching and then watch again highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:58 PM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJ86qPEsmK8&ab_channel=SimpsonsClips24 YouTube SimpsonsClips24 Roald Dahl's The BFG (1989) - Full Movie (FULLY RESTORED)

mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:58 PM My own wifi is causing issues but i would think so thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:58 PM Thank you! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 9:58 PM i hope highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:58 PM 5:07. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 9:59 PM Got it! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 9:59 PM Wonderful! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:00 PM i think it's better, ill let you know if it's still an issue when things are like, actively going on Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:00 PM snatch thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:00 PM Oh no! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:02 PM That kid surely has whiplash by now thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:02 PM Right? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:02 PM OH SURE. OF COURSE THE OTHER GUYS DON'T WEAR PANTS. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:04 PM I'm at my max volume and im still having trouble hearing thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:04 PM Oh, good!  Accents! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:04 PM "OI VOTED TWICE FOR LEAVE, OI DIDS!" Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:06 PM Oh no. P u n s. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:06 PM how COULD she think otherwise! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:06 PM It's a mystery! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:07 PM I'm just vibing and listening to this in the background I think either my headphones are bunk or my ears are thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:08 PM Sorry if you've already checked, but are they plugged in all the way mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:10 PM They're bluetooth But I'm at max volume and can still barely make it out Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Oh wait! Discord has its own volume slider, have you checked that yet? Like, in your own call mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:11 PM I'm on mobile That's also at max Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:11 PM Awww :/ thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:12 PM "well, since I'm trapped here forever, I guess I CAN keep a secret" mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:13 PM Oop that's way better thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:14 PM good job! That water looks... unwholesome ...is it booze Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:20 PM No... it's Fart Soda. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:20 PM ............................................ Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:20 PM WAIT A MINUTE. THERE'S A SONG ABOUT IT?? ......Okay, okay, that's probably more true to the book.... thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:21 PM oh my god Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:21 PM I KNOW. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:21 PM "No!" It would have been less uncomfortable if he'd just loaded her up with liquor. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:22 PM :point_up_2: mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:22 PM as someone who's listening and not watching: What's a whizzpop fizzbang thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:23 PM It's a fart that makes you fly up in the air somehow. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:23 PM Someone else explain this so I don't have to. Thank you. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:24 PM I swear I'm not making this up. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:24 PM Also your species is disgusting. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:24 PM agreed thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:24 PM This is NOT representative. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:24 PM Listen, you're not wrong, but we don't do that-- thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:24 PM it is 100% fake highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:24 PM Too late. These things can't be unknown. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:24 PM admittedly while our modes of failure are more numerous, yours are more explosive. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:25 PM Oh slag, what did I miss? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:25 PM There was a song about farts. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:25 PM Time to rewind it so Smokescreen can be subjected to it. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:25 PM Farts... NO mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:25 PM for instance: Humans when they get shot in the heart just die quietly, meanwhile you guys explode Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:25 PM I'M GOOD thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:25 PM Yes, let's! Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:25 PM You don't die when you get shot!! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:26 PM we can pull a joint and collapse, you can pull a T-cog and turn into a metal ball instead of a car Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:26 PM ......I'm not listening to this again. No. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:26 PM What would happen if you stood on your head after eating a whizzpop fizzbang Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:27 PM That drink looks delicious am I going to regret saying that Oh. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:27 PM Yes.  Oh. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:28 PM I can only assume you'd be flattened by g-forces, if you stood on your head. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:29 PM failing that the bubbles get confused, and you explode hilariously. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:29 PM No, no, it's the gas that goes down.  So you'd just burp. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:29 PM no you'd explode Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:29 PM So what happens if you chug the whole thing mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:29 PM humans need more ways to explode, cybertronians get all the fun. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:29 PM ....oh right, you do have a point NOT THE EXPLODING THING MY MESSAGE SENT AT A BAD TIME mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:29 PM YES the exploding thing Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:30 PM NO!! WE CAN EXPLODE IN SO MANY WAYS, WE DON'T NEED MORE mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:30 PM THE GIANT ROBOTS HAVE MORE WAY TO EXPLODE THAN WE DO. THEY ARE WINNING. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:30 PM ... Wait, so this is the BFG, right? I can't believe they made a story called the Big Fucking Gun mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:30 PM yeah that's what they're on a quest to get the small child needs the Big Fucking Gun to murder the giant with to take its powers and become giant themself Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:32 PM I have to say, I very much admire the people that painted the backgrounds thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:32 PM Definitely Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:35 PM What decade is this from again? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:36 PM 1980s. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:37 PM Ooooooooo Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:37 PM I thought I recognized those synth noises. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:38 PM has someone exploded yet Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:39 PM Not yet. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:39 PM boooo Mimic — Yesterday at 10:39 PM hello! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:39 PM Hello!  You missed an entire musical number about... farts. Mimic — Yesterday at 10:40 PM I... wish that was not something that has occurred more than once in my life highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:41 PM "I gets a tingly feeling when I peeks into the bedroom window." Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:41 PM Oh. Oh no highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:41 PM Aaand then this happens. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:41 PM I kind of wonder if he's supposed to be doing this mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:41 PM whaaaaats happenin Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:41 PM Oh, this feels like my nightmares, synth and everything Mimic — Yesterday at 10:41 PM the shit animated movies used to get away with Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:41 PM Less Optimus though highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:42 PM Mine could do with a little less synth and a little more Optimus. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:42 PM :smirk: Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:42 PM Well, in fairness, that is the most accurate animated version of a dream I've ever seen. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:42 PM Are you SURE you want Optimus to stare at you in utter disappointment, Woojit? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:42 PM Wait, you guys both dream about synth noises? Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:43 PM Don't all dreams contain an aggressive synth soundtrack? Mimic — Yesterday at 10:43 PM mine do occasionally get aggressively vaporwave... thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:44 PM Sure, hold her up so she can see someone get murdered Soulsteel — Yesterday at 10:44 PM The moral of this story is don't sleep with your windows open. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:44 PM That sounds like the opposite of a problem. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:45 PM Woojit, I would love to swap dreams with you if I could. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:45 PM Honestly, I hardly ever remember my dreams' sounds. Once, a sound around me worked into a dream... so I know it must happen, but. I can't remember synth soundtracks. .......They could be there. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:45 PM PPHPHFFFF- The queen? You sure? Soulsteel — Yesterday at 10:46 PM I can and will. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:46 PM Pffffff So is it like, his job, supernaturally, to give people dreams?  Or is it more of a hobby Is he the sandman highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:47 PM A very questionable hobby. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:47 PM ... Is he responsible for ALL dreams? Like. All dreams? Even the questionable ones? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:47 PM He did sort of imply, when they were in dream country, that they can go to people on their own. Mimic — Yesterday at 10:47 PM definitely a hobby. he greatly enjoys sneaking good dreams into the ears of sleeping children. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:47 PM His whole bit about catching the bad dreams so nobody will have them Just seems... weird and intrusive mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:48 PM brb I've gotta do a Thing that the stream audio will distract me from Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:48 PM But like.... What about the dreams that are... you know. Funner. I don't think I want HIM to make those dreams for me thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:48 PM Like I said!  Weird and intrusive. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:49 PM Oh he makes those dreams for you just for you Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:50 PM Noooooo mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:50 PM we all get them from our brains but you get BFG made ones as a treat Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:50 PM That explains a lot mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 10:50 PM from the big fucking gun Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:50 PM He can keep those dreams highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:51 PM The BFG enjoys the noises you make when you sleep. You specifically. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:52 PM You know? I think I can go a few nights without sleeping! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:53 PM Shhhhh your brain makes your dreams, too. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:53 PM This maid is having a very weird day. Mimic — Yesterday at 10:53 PM and you're sure he won't be waiting? just... waiting for you, specifically, to sleep? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:53 PM "Come speak to me from the only angle they felt the need to draw me at." Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:53 PM .... Hey, Woojit, how long can a bot go without sleeping? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:54 PM Why are the maid's eyes all blue like that?  Has she been at the spice? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:54 PM She's wracked by lead poisoning. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:54 PM "It stands for big fucking gun!" And then he leads an assassination attempt thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:55 PM Ha! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:55 PM "WhoOAAh." Mimic — Yesterday at 10:55 PM "OKAY, THIS MIGHT AS WELL BE HAPPENING" highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:55 PM You'll pass out, but not before hallucinating the BFG. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:56 PM :trauma: highglossfinish — Yesterday at 10:56 PM "Oh dear, she's frightfully dead." thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:57 PM Oh god Sharpwing — Yesterday at 10:57 PM Well, this scene is oddly exact to the newer one. Framing and all. Soulsteel — Yesterday at 10:57 PM Where is Parliament in all of this? Mimic — Yesterday at 10:57 PM Also, is the queen sedated?! she is taking all this way too calmly thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:57 PM She's super high Mimic — Yesterday at 10:58 PM yeah, that tracks Smokescreen — Yesterday at 10:59 PM I wish I could be that high! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 10:59 PM "anymore" Mimic — Yesterday at 11:00 PM okay, high on what, because unless she produces thc in her bloodstream we are rapidly outpacing "high on weed" and approaching "high on multiple types of opiate" Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:01 PM These all sound like viable Decepticon names. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:01 PM The queen can't feel her feet. She doesn't even care that a giant just soiled himself in front of her breakfast table. Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:01 PM MORE DAKA Mimic — Yesterday at 11:02 PM MORE DAKKA thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:02 PM More dakka! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:04 PM Ah yes... the cheerful music over the imposing brigade of helicopters I feel like the tone is... off thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:04 PM Flying into the Eye of Sauron Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:05 PM I feel like this violates a lot of laws of both worlds. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:05 PM ARE THOSE DINOSAURS thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:05 PM At this point, why not! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:07 PM How are they not waking up. Never mind..... thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:08 PM Gosh, I think I saw a porno like this once Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:08 PM you what? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:08 PM Nothing Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:08 PM ... Where Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:08 PM I was about to say, I've seen enough hentai to know where this is going. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:10 PM Whoops! Mimic — Yesterday at 11:10 PM Be aware of your surroundings! Zombieland rules, dammit! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:11 PM Wait... they call him the BFG?? But they're so much bigger than him?? thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:11 PM Maybe they don't know what it stands for? Mimic — Yesterday at 11:11 PM might be sarcasm. "Oh, look at you being big enough to be friendly instead of murderous like us" Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:11 PM Instead of freeing his compatriots or neutralizing the humans, he stomps off to fight alone. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:12 PM Well, they don't seem very bright Mimic — Yesterday at 11:12 PM ... wait, did the BFG inspire the house elves in Harry Potter. 'cause looking at him getting shaken around reminds me a loooot of Dobby Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:12 PM He doesn't seem to be the sharpest when it comes to strategy. ...Or teeth, for that matter. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:12 PM OH god, you're right Dobby is not eating humans! Mimic — Yesterday at 11:14 PM Other giants is bad, evil giants! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:15 PM "Oi is not a traitor because..........." Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:16 PM Why did the giant have an ass like that. They did not have to do that. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:16 PM There were a lot of things in this movie they didn't have to do Mimic — Yesterday at 11:16 PM no they did not, but like the sculptors of the Mothman statue, they cared highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:19 PM Plot twist, the BFG was a remorseless child eater and he just eliminated the competition. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:19 PM The dreams are so they don't struggle. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:19 PM "None of yis are safe!" Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:19 PM PFFFFF- Can you imagine? Soulsteel — Yesterday at 11:19 PM Shhh, no tears, only dreams. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:20 PM oh. he's making blowing dreams ... That explains a lot thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:20 PM oh. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:20 PM Oh, so he's the one responsible for those? Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:20 PM That explains some of the weird Shockwave dreams. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:20 PM I"m sure everyone has weird Shockwave dreams. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:21 PM Are you even a Cybertronian if you don't have a weird dream about Shockwave at least once? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:21 PM Absolutely not. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:21 PM ... What are your Shockwave dreams/nightmares like, Woojit? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:22 PM They usually involve him doing sordid things to me and taking down the numbers. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:22 PM Yeah, that sounds about right. Does his eye turn into a horrifying, yet alluring mouth in your dreams, too? highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:22 PM He doesn't even have a house. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:23 PM He doesn't even have food for her. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:23 PM Not yet, but they just might start now. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:23 PM You're welcome, Woojit! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:23 PM THE SONG IS BACK. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:23 PM :frowning: Mimic — Yesterday at 11:23 PM was it important enough to warrant being hte credits song highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:24 PM l dream of Soundwave's eye mouth while this song plays. Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:24 PM He can do some impressive things with it!! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:24 PM I'm sure he can! Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:24 PM He can eat an entire energon cube, cube and all! Mimic — Yesterday at 11:24 PM this is an endorsement? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:24 PM .....Is this a bad time to mention I have a small figure of Shockwave, and I put a googly eye where his eye is? Mimic — Yesterday at 11:24 PM that makes you an artist Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:25 PM I am! I painted the figure too, I painted most ones I have thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:25 PM This is the perfect time to mention that. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:26 PM I wouldn't even have thought to mention it, except I laughed really hard at it while sleep-deprived last night lmao Mimic — Yesterday at 11:26 PM what I'm saying specifically is that act awes me with your creative direction Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:26 PM Oh boy!! I wanna play Raid Shadow Legends now! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:26 PM ndksfjgnsdklfjg I think I saw someone else do it first tbh I forget where or who though Mimic — Yesterday at 11:27 PM if you don't remember where you got it but still acted on it and enjoyed the result, I can still appreciate you chose to do that Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:28 PM Thank you, he looks ridiculous Mimic — Yesterday at 11:28 PM good thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:31 PM I love it ...this is like dwarf fortress except your guys don't trigger the traps highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:32 PM Oh no. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:33 PM :person_facepalming: Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:34 PM I hear human flesh and I. I need to head back home and grab dinner! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:34 PM Smokescreen????? Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:34 PM I forgot to grab a snack before I got here! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:34 PM What exactly are you having for dinner :angry: Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:34 PM NOT HUMAN thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:35 PM We just watched a WHOLE MOVIE about how that's bad! Mimic — Yesterday at 11:35 PM ... sus Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:35 PM It's Energon! Made into noodles and stuff! Nothing like humans, I think thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:35 PM okay good Smokescreen — Yesterday at 11:35 PM What kinda bot do you think I am?? Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:36 PM I am now wondering what the equivalent of cheap ramen is for you thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:36 PM One who hears about eating human flesh and thinks of dinner, apparently! ...So, farting is a theme for this stream, huh. "Let's go straight to hell!" Oh my god He's sleeping. highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:43 PM Suggestions to end the night on, anyone? Mimic — Yesterday at 11:43 PM oh! I have one! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsNAu72v2Yc YouTube Screen Rant CATS Pitch Meeting

mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:45 PM Like a second big thing or just random videos thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:45 PM "and the prize is... death!" "oh, my god" mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:47 PM i have a thing lemme get a link https://youtu.be/okFP92BfkUU YouTube Alex Bale SPONGEBOB CONSPIRACY #4: The Evolution Theory

I'm entirely serious highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:47 PM "Because." Mimic — Yesterday at 11:48 PM "Now you're getting it!" "No, I'm not, no." thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:48 PM "barely an inconvenience!" Mimic — Yesterday at 11:48 PM btw, there's one of these for the Bayformers movie too. thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:49 PM "oh right, oh my god" mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:50 PM i still offer the Spunch Bop theory Mimic — Yesterday at 11:50 PM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKCZttlAj1E and I offer this YouTube Screen Rant Transformers Pitch Meeting

mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:51 PM dear god his optics Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:52 PM :eye: :eye: thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:52 PM accurate Mimic — Yesterday at 11:52 PM hah! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:54 PM very efficient! highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:54 PM "Kind of." mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:54 PM Is that something the allspark can do at all like just point it at a car and suddenly it's a car Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:54 PM Is someone's mic on? mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:54 PM or did they just bullshit that IT WAS MINE OH NO Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:55 PM I just heard a very tiny laugh, it's fine thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:55 PM Gosh I wonder why Megatron would be mad at this point :thinking: Barely an inconvenience! "what" mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:57 PM i once again offer: https://youtu.be/okFP92BfkUU YouTube Alex Bale SPONGEBOB CONSPIRACY #4: The Evolution Theory

this nonsense highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:57 PM I'm afraid that's where we need to pack it in. Mimic — Yesterday at 11:57 PM well, thank you for the stream! mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:57 PM Aw Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:57 PM Thanks!! It was........ well it was fun at least highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:57 PM It was...something! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:58 PM It Was A Thing! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:58 PM Thank you for hosting! :smile: highglossfinish — Yesterday at 11:58 PM Good night everyone, and as always, thank you for coming! Mimic — Yesterday at 11:58 PM good night, and thank you! Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:58 PM Gnight!<3 Thank you for hosting! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:58 PM Despite making us listen to the fart song three times. Sharpwing — Yesterday at 11:58 PM THERE WAS THAT, YES. mysteryfleshpitnationalpark — Yesterday at 11:58 PM night! thanke! thenightetc2 — Yesterday at 11:59 PM Goodnight!

[twitchesandstitches]

💀🥔❤️🗯️💛📚 - Power Girl, Wonder Woman, Tionishia, Centorea, Ranamon, Blue Diamond and Ahsoka Tano. (A bit of a long one, but i hope it works.)

omg that is a LOT tho

Power Girl: am leaning towards ‘rarely’. depends on how villainous they are; if not villain, then probably not. if villain, at least temporarily digestion? if they’re energy-based though, she may do so automatically regardless of whether or not she wants to, due to her powers

Wonder Woman: she follows mythic hero rules, so she does so in the same circumstances of slaying a monster, but she’s not casual about it

tionishia: depends on their threat level and how hungry she is. going with the idea that ogres are prone to extreme overindulgence, she might do so if they taste good or make her feel super FULL

centorea: more likely than not, yes, especially if they are plant-based; it mixes with horse and human cravings a lot, and she regards it as part of the whole point of swallowing someone.

Ranamon: Rarely; its very contextual. she may be called to do it for her duties or removing things that need to be hidden, like consuming forbidden lore.

Blue Diamond: I like to think that she used to be a ferocious and merciless devourer, adn while she’s TRYING to be a better person, the compulsion to simply swallow whole and digest anything offending her on a whim.

Ahsoka: I figure that while the Jedi Code permits this sort of thing (since they don’t have any particular restrictions against necessary killing), overindulgence is frowned upon. This Ahsoka may or may not abide by the Code, but it still influences her, so she tries to restrain herself.

----------

Does your muse prefer lazy, fat prey?

Power Girl and Wonder Woman: Not really! they tend to view devouring as a tool in their arsenel, not as an end in itself, and they don’t have many preferences.

Tionishia: Almost certainly; she enjoys rich, tasty treats, especially ones that have so much meat and succulent tastes of self-indulgence on them.

Centorea: she doesn’t PREFER them, but she likes this kind of prey, but refuses to admit it; she feels that implying she prefers easily caught prey implies ineptitude.

Ranamon: I think that feels about right for her?

Blue Diamond: Very likely! Perhaps at one point, she created Gems specifically to devour large amounts of resources, getting very big in the process, and BD ate them in turn to recoup the resources.

Ahsoka: Again, no particular preference there.

-----------

Tell us about a great experience your muse has had with vore!

Power Girl: She once ate an entire sun, getting a massive power boost and size increase; we’re talking taller than a solar system, boobs bigger than the rest of her body, and a power increase to match. it didn’t last but it felt REALLY GOOD

Wonder Woman: She slew an incarnation of Jormagundr in this fashion with her god-buddy, Thor; it was the biggest meal she ever had!

Tionishia: She had a date with fem Kimihito, and her ravenous appetite demanded more and more, and Kimihito offered herself to her; it was a very lovely digestion and Tio was so FULL, and suspects it was the love involved that satisfied her.

Centorea: She took part in a competition where the losers would be meals for the winner, and she won in splendid fashion. She was merciful and allowed them to reform not long afterwards, but she was so STRONG, and her gut so swollen with their wriggling bodies as they dissolved into her, and she relishes the pleasure of that day.

Ranamon: Once devoured a terrible grimoire of ultimate evil, obscuring its dreadful secrets from the multiverse; she actually had something of a tummyache for a while, but it was worth it.

Blue Diamond: After reforming her ways, she repopulated multiple worlds by consuming them and gestating entirely new, fertile ones within herself. IT felt intensely pleasurable and the first truly good thing she had done in a long time, and it gave her a sense of purpose after the fall of the Gem empire.

Ahsoka: At one point, confronted and bested a dreadful wizard of the bleakest arts, overcomign his powerful abilities to consume him. at the time she’d been suffering something of a crisis of confidence, and it reignited her sense of skill and purpose.

-----------

Does your muse experience stomach rumbles or burps after eating someone?

Power Girl: unlikely. probably lots of solar glowing, though.

Wonder Woman: Briefly. sounds like continents moving.

Tionishia: Yes. it is VERY loud and sounds like her belly is bigger on the inside.

Centorea: Yes. very, very loud, due to her multiple chambered stomachs (A combo of human stomaches, horse stomaches, and the weird ways they interact together.)

Ranamon: Kind of; no rumbles or burps normally, but there’s a strange sound as they are converted into pure data.

Blue Diamond: She does not burp or rumble at all unless she specifically wants to, because of how Gems work; digestion rarely involves fluids, for example, but converting prey into magical energy to be absorbed directly or reworked into another form. She CAN, if she wants to.

Ahsoka: Yes. pretty noisy, actually.

-----------

What sort of pred does your muse like?

Power Girl, Wonder Woman: They are similar in that they don’t liked to be preyed upon at all; they’re big time heroes and this sets a poor example, and they’re too fierce to easily have the submissive mindset that characterizes prey in one way or another. you must be WORTHY to do so, but their definitions vary; Power Girl thinks you must be strong, while Wondy feels you should just have the courage to try. (You might not be able to survive trying, though.)

Tionishia: She requires that you be at least somewhat polite. Sort of like taking a girl out to dinner, really.

Centorea: She professes to firmly disapprove of this, but in secret, she does like this, but requires a firm subordinate/superior relation between herself and the pred, with pred as superior.

Ranamon: Kind of prefers her preds to be cool and interesting, and technologically based; not out of bias against organics, but due to her composition, she’s only likely to experience anything if they are able to process data. (Which CAN happen with powerful organic preds anyway, but she’s not aware of this.)

Blue Diamond: She does not like to be eaten. She is still proud and mighty, and sees herself as far above the likes of prey!

Ahsoka: Someone who is very much NOT dark side-aligned, emotionally speaking, tends to fit the bill.

-----

How many times has your muse been digested or inside a pred’s stomach?

Wonder Woman: Rarely. It’s happened a few times, and its treated as the mutually exclusive deaths of heroes in ancient myths, but she’s loath to have repeats.

Power Girl: A few villains have managed it, and some heroines as well; tends to get her miffed, too.

Tionishia: Reasonably common, though they must be pretty big or voracious to contain so much ogre inside them! She thinks its cuddly and sweet.

Centorea: She’s more common a predator than prey, but it’s happened; once by fem!Kimihito, Rachnera and Tio, and most frequently by Miia, who is now sporting a REALLY big pair of boobs that was once Centorea’s physical body in previous times.

Ranamon: She’s embarassed to admit that she’s frequiently called to upload viruses to enemy servers or networks, and this involves getting ‘eaten’ by manifestations of those servers in the digital realm.

Blue Diamond: she’s bigger than a planet even when she’s not trying, and can be considered a goddess by most standards; it’s RARE. but it can happen! (Rose Quartz and Connie have both done it, on separate occasions.) She doesn’t approve of being reminded of it!

Ahsoka: If the Jedi have vore duels, she’s probably lost a fair number of times, though not in recent times. in her travels, she’s lost her fair share of consumption battles, so she’s familiar with the inside of guts.

[trashytummiez]

Maybe a fic where Harley has to deal with an incredibly noisy hungry stomach? There can be stuffing in the second half if you want.

*GRRWUUUOOOORRRRBL*

"Jesus Harl. When's the last time you ate?" Poison Ivy asked a little dumbfounded by the loud hungry rumbles bellowing from Harley Quinn's tummy.

The young bleached criminal wrapped her arms around her bare noisy midriff and curled up a little when another sharp growl rumbled forth.

"It's been a minute. Oof," Harley complained while her bleached stomach continued noisily expressing its irritation.

The two were in the middle of breaking into an underground vault owned by infamous mobster Salvatore Maroni. Harley had already bashed all the goons into unconsciousness. Now Ivy was using her plant powers to finagle her way into Maroni's stash.

But bashing bad guys around stirred Harley Quinn's appetite something fierce because her tummy would not shut up. It was honestly getting distracting for Poison Ivy who needed the utmost concentration to worm her vines into the vault. Especially when another animal-like growl bellowed from the petite villains tummy.

*GLRAAAAAAAARRRRGUUUULLGH*

Harley could see Ivy's concentration breaking and pouted. "Here lemme get away so my tummy stops buggin' ya."

She stepped away from Ivy and gently rubbed her stomach to try and get it to settle down.

"C'mon Madam Dudley! I'll feed ya all the pizzas'n meatball subs ya can growl fer if ya just keep it down a lil bit," Harley pleaded with her own stomach.

The loud growl it emitted suggested that the negotiations had failed.

Harley frowned and lightly punched her own belly in frustration. "Yer such a butt sometimes ya know that?"

Even from far away Ivy could hear Harley's hunger pangs erupting from her middle. That and seeing her argue with her tummy again was getting a little sad. So she stopped trying to break into the vault itself and beckoned to Harley.

"Alright, you and Madam Whatever The Hell come here," Ivy instructed while Harley walked over to her girlfriend still holding her noisy tummy in one hand while it growled some more.

She leaned Harley against the wall and gently began to rub Harley's belly. Ivy's green mildly prickly hand slowly ran up and down Harley's tummy using her fingers to gently knead into her soft ghost-white skin. Harley Quinn went cross eyed and groaned contently. She rested in a more relaxed state against the wall while Poison Ivy continued rubbing her tummy.

Harley's stomach rumbled in Ivy's hand but then Ivy placed her second hand on Harley's middle and used both to stroke and knead it all over. The hungry growls turned to a more pleased burble which Harley shared in a light moan.

"Ahhhhh that's soooo nice..." Harley cooed.

"I know," Ivy replied then leaned close to kiss Harley on the lips. The plant based metahuman took Harley's breath away prompting the two to lovingly make out with each other. While they did Ivy continued rubbing Harley's belly with one hand but was now using the other to control the vines from outside to breach the vault.

She got it open in no time. Of course by then she had more important matters on her mind.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

BBBRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHP!!!!!!

"Excuse you," Ivy said with a deep blush on her cheeks after Harley gave that huge burp.

"Ahhh that hit the spot!" Harley boasted as she flopped onto the couch and patted her belly in satisfaction. Her tummy was so bloated after their victory lunch that she had unzip her leather shorts and even pull then down a little to give her stomach extra room to stick out.

Ivy crawled atop the couch with Harley and cuddled up with her girlfriend. She rested her head against Harley's bulging tummy and listened it to gurgle heavily and pleasantly from being so stuffed.

"Madam Tumley sounds a lot more agreeable than she did an hour ago huh," Ivy teased and gingerly started rubbing Harley's bloated tummy in circles again.

A gurgle from her stuffed stomach made Harley turn her head and loudly burp behind her fist. Ivy swooned at that image.

"Ngh...her name is Madam Tomai thank you very much," Harley corrected.

Ivy blinked.

"I thought you said...nevermind," Ivy rolled her eyes then continued lovingly rubbing Harley's round belly and just listening to it churn while her meal digested. "I'll tell you Harley. I definitely prefer the sounds your stomach is making now versus the sounds they were making earlier."

Harley nodded with a strange look on her face. The way her stomach bubbled and the look of light strain suggested Harley felt another burp coming. Harley thumped her chest and expelled a deep brassy burp. Then she threw her head back and let an even bigger and longer one out immediately after.

BRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP!!!!

BWWWOOOOOUURRR-UUUUUUUUURRRRRAAAAAAHHP!!!!!!!!!

Ivy's face was as red as her hair. Harley burped so hard that the surface of her bloated belly actually rippled beneath Ivy's hand and head.

Harley sighed heavily and patted the side of her tummy in relief. Then she turned to her blushing girlfriend and flashed her a grin. "Betcha prefer those sounds more too."

"...Just a bit."

[kikcalum-blog]

no more bad days (part one)

prompt: after losing their home, shawn and his girlfriend must learn to navigate their newfound hardships of life together. [reader insert!]

words: 3.2k

category: fluff, some angst

a/n: i did not copy this from another user because i am that other user. thank ya:)

Shawn stuffed his face further down into his scarf as the two fought against the harsh snow falling down upon them. He held Y/N close to his side and gripped his suitcase a little tighter, grunting when he felt her begin to slow down.

“C'mon, baby.” Shawn nudged her gently, motioning just up the road. “We’re almost there, see?”

The city’s streets were unbearably silent save for the whizzing of freezing air that seeped into their skin and chilled their bones. He could tell she was extremely tired and cold just as he was, but he refused to let her give up now when they were so close.

He could hear her sigh of relief when he finally reached out to open a door, warm air hitting them instantly. Shawn quickly dragged her into the building and turned around to face her, examining her better now that they weren’t being berated by the snowfall. Her arms seemed stuck to her body and nearly her entire face was covered to keep out the cold, only her snow-frosted eyelashes peeking out.

Shawn moved his hands to begin unraveling her many layers until he finally saw her face, her pout and her flushed cheeks shattering his heart. She said nothing as she did the same for him, taking special care to run her delicate fingers over his cool cheek that was finally beginning to regain its color. Once they were finally done and settled in, they took a look around.

The place wasn’t the fanciest, of course; nobody ever expected a homeless shelter to be. The wallpaper around them had begun to split from the base and rot, giving the room a brown tint. The floors were of a hard wood that creaked with every other step one took, and the light overhead flickered with the promise of a short; however, anything was better than their former spot in an alley.

Y/N clung to him tightly as he walked up to the front desk, clearing his throat to catch the attention of the redhead sitting there.

“Excuse me?” Shawn prodded, biting down on his bottom lip. “Do you all have room for two more?”

The woman slanted her lips as if she were considering whether or not to tell them the truth- whether or not to let them stay the night. Her eyes flitted between the couple seemingly in judgement but it was the pleading look in Y/N’s eyes that finally broke her down.

“We have one cot left.” The woman let up, nodding her head slowly. “Write your names here and go through those doors, it shouldn’t be hard to find.”

Y/N pursed her lips to fight back any protest or outburst she was conjuring in her mind, instead deciding to merely pick up the pen, write their names, and grab Shawn’s hand to drag him into the next room.

The room wasn’t anything North of what they were expecting. The dimly lit room was packed with people just like them, scattered around on the many cots provided. In this sea of people were whole families, single men and women, and couples alike. Coughs and sneezes were commonplace and the smell was unlike anything they’d ever witnessed, but as they made their way to the one empty cot, all they felt was numbness and none of the aforementioned things mattered.

“Put your stuff down, let’s go get something to eat.” Shawn whispered, making sure to keep his hands on her at all times. He knew how anxious she could get in crowded situations like this but he would help her in any way he could, just as she always did for him. Y/N did as he said and set her things down on and next to the cot, following closely behind him as he led them to the kitchen portion of the shelter.

The tomato soup was certainly nothing special, and the same could be said for the extremely hard, half piece of grilled cheese that went along with it. Y/N sat across from Shawn in the relatively empty kitchen, presuming that everyone had gotten their food earlier. He noticed she hadn’t spoken a single word since they started their journey to the shelter, always having her head down low and lips pressed tightly together.

She was trying her best to be strong for him and she knew that if she spoke, the quiver in her voice would give her true pain away. She certainly didn’t need to hide this from him as he felt her pain all the same, but Y/N was stubborn, so Shawn let it go for the time being, instead focusing on ways to make her smile.

Shawn pretended to bite down onto his piece of grilled cheese as if it were a brick, immediately retaliating and wincing jokingly. This brought that smile of hers that he loved dearly back to her face, her cheeks heating up. Even at times like this, he was still the same dork she’d always known.

He continued on with these gimmicks and jokes until he was down to his last spoonful of tomato soup, downing it quickly. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and it was then that he let out a roaring burp, his own eyes growing wide at the intensity of it. This was what it took for a genuine laugh to rip from Y/N’s throat, her eyebrows raised in disbelief.

“Oh my god, that was disgusting!” She continued to laugh, wiping away a tear at the corner of her eye. Shawn smiled brightly, relishing in the serenity of her beautiful laugh. It was a laugh that could mend spirits and souls and the warm sound did that for him every time he felt down, but it wasn’t often that he heard it nowadays, so he cherished this moment dearly.

He was surprised when she retaliated with a burp of her own, the loud sound ripping through her chest and into the small room’s air. His jaw dropped in disbelief that the huge noise just came from the small girl and she couldn’t control her giggles, covering her mouth with her hands.

“And you had the nerve to talk about my burp!” Shawn laughed, running a hand through his hair and shaking his head. When her laughs finally died down (To his dismay) she reached her hands out to grab his, staring into his eyes in deep thought. This sudden change in attitude worried him and he squeezed her fingers, cocking his head.

“What are you thinking about?” He inquired.

Y/N chewed on her lip and he could tell that she was tripping over herself, wondering how to word her next sentence. She eventually took a deep breath and shrugged, soothingly rubbing her thumbs over Shawn’s knuckles.

“I dunno, I just..” She trailed off, gaze flickering down to the table. “I think it’s time to call your parents.”

She felt Shawn begin to pull away with a groan which was the opposite of what she wanted, gently pulling him back as she insisted, “Shawn, maybe you’re being too modest. I know we were doing okay for a while but you know we can’t keep on like this. Something’s gotta give.”

Shawn bit the inside of his cheek and looked at her; really looked at her. The bags under her eyes were dark and deep, her skin dry and lips chapped. She’d definitely seen better days; Hell, they both had. He frowned at this and guilt overtook him. He was always saying that he’d do anything for her, so if that meant putting his dignity aside to get her out of the cold, he’d do it.

“Okay.” He agreed, gravitating back towards her again. She smiled as he continued, “I’ll call them first thing in the morning, I promise. Now hurry up and eat your brick sandwich so we can sleep.”

-

Shawn situated himself as close as he could to Y/N on their tiny shared cot, draping both of their heavy jackets over top. She pushed her back further into his chest and he snaked an arm over her side, nuzzling his face into her neck with a sigh.

Mostly everyone else in the shelter had turned in for the night save for a few people holding conversations here and there.

Time passed with the two merely breathing with one another, the feeling calming both of them. He wasn’t sure if she was sleep or not as he hadn’t heard her speak in a while and he didn’t want to ask in fear of waking her up, so he only resorted to running his fingers over her arm, shutting his eyes tiredly.

“I dunno if you’re asleep or not, but I just have something to say.” Shawn whispered as low as he could, taking a deep breath. “I love you more than words can describe. I know you want to give up sometimes but we can get through this as long as we stick together. I’ve got us, okay?”

Shawn wasn’t sure what answer he was expecting but when he heard her soft snore confirming that she was sleep, a warm smile blossomed on his lips, heart at ease knowing that she was resting; that she was okay.

He breathed out a short laugh and relaxed his muscles, knowing that everything would work out in the end.

“I’ve got us.”

-

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Y/N asked, unloading her suitcase from the taxi.

Shawn was unsure as he stared up at his childhood home. For most, returning home after years would instill happiness and good memories, but not for him. The falling-out he’d had with Karen and Manny left their relationship nearly nonexistent and coming back was the last thing he wanted to do, but he knew he had no choice.

He’d met Y/N when he was only 16; high school sweethearts, and made the decision to move out with her when he was only 18. His parents were never particularly fond of her to begin with and that was what stirred the pot and started the entire feud. Karen and Manny warned him of how stupid of an idea it was, saying that she wasn’t right for him and she wasn’t responsible enough. Shawn was set in his beliefs that he was making the right choice, though, spawning a series of bitter fights. It hurt that his family wasn’t accepting of the love of his life, but he had to make a decision.

And two years later, after cutting off his family, here he was, right back on their doorstep.

Shawn held onto Y/N’s hand tightly when the door swung open, revealing Karen standing with her arms over her chest. Her expression was hard to make out, a mix of happiness and anger all at once. Y/N shifted uncomfortably on her feet when she reminded herself that she was the reason for Karen’s latter emotion.

His mother stepped to the side and allowed the two inside, granting Shawn a “Welcome home”.

Shawn squeezed his girlfriend’s hand as they walked inside, instantly hit with a wave of emotions. The air was thick when Manny walked out of the kitchen, wiping his hands on a paper towel. He eyed the two up and down before holding his hand out to Y/N, making her eyes widen in surprise.

“Nice to see you again.” Manny greeted, shaking her hand when she finally took it. “I wish it were under better circumstances.”

“Y-Yeah.” Y/N nodded, letting go nervously. “Me too.”

Karen cut her eyes at Manny’s hospitality and sighed, nodding to Shawn. “You both can sleep in Shawn’s old bedroom. Make yourselves at home.”

The couple could tell that she didn’t mean that but Shawn gave her a tight-lipped nod anyway, wasting no time in dragging Y/N and their luggage up the stairs and to his room. As soon as they’d stepped through the doorway he closed the door, groaning loudly and going to crash on the queen-sized bed.

“Well, that could have gone a lot worse.” Shawn muttered, running his hands over his face. When she didn’t reply he lifted his head from the bed, opening his eyes to see her still stationary at the door, nervously twiddling with her fingers. “Babe, what’s wrong?”

Y/N shook her head and took a few timid steps forward to sit on the edge of the bed. “I dunno. I feel so hated here. And I was expecting to, but now that it’s actually happening, it’s worse than I thought.”

Shawn frowned and sat up, scooting to sit next to her and wrap his arms around her. He leaned down to make sure she saw his face as he insisted, “They don’t hate you, Y/N. If anything, they’re more mad at me- you know that. But none of this is our fault. All that matters now is that we have food and shelter, and we can finally get back on our feet.”

Y/N wasn’t convinced though, changing the subject. “’M tired, I think I’m going to take a nap.”

Shawn considered trying to drill his words of encouragement into her brain more but he knew deep down that she wouldn’t listen to him. So, he let it go, allowing her to strip down and situate herself underneath his covers. He leaned down to kiss her forehead, lingering there for a second before disconnecting.

He would do anything for her, and he hoped that she knew that.

Shutting off the light, he exited his bedroom and mentally prepared himself for what was next to come. He knew that as soon as he walked down the stairs, his parents would begin their skepticism, their “I told you so"s, and their snarky comments. And he was completely right.

"So what happened exactly?” Karen instantly questioned when Shawn walked into the kitchen. She stared down into her teacup, stirring it slowly. Manny leaned against the kitchen counter with his arms crossed, choosing to remain silent.

Shawn cleared his throat and pocketed his hands. “We couldn’t make it with the jobs we had. Her college fees were piling up and the apartment fees increased and it was all too much.”

Karen stopped stirring for a few pulses before looking up at her son sadly, “I told you moving in with her was a bad idea-”

“Karen, stop.” Manny ordered sternly, shooting darts at his wife. “Look, the past is the past. We all make mistakes and ours was being so quick to judge. He needs our help now, isn’t that all that matters to you?”

She took a sip of her tea and looked between the two men, her mind trying to conjure a response. Deep down, she knew that Manny was right, and her bitterness was uncalled for. Still, she couldn’t completely let it go, settling with, “Dinner will be ready in an hour. Let Y/N know, please.”

It wasn’t much, but it was progress, and Shawn would wholeheartedly accept it for the time being.

-

“So, how do you all plan to get back out there?” Manny questioned, pushing up his glasses and stabbing at a piece of broccoli on his plate. It was more than awkward as both couples sat on opposite sides of the table, the air thick with tension once again. Shawn began to speak up but Y/N interrupted him.

“I have an interview tomorrow!” She sprung up, sporting a fake smile. “At Google. If I get the job, it could change everything for us.”

Karen pursed her lips, looking up from her plate for a second. “What do you do?”

“Software engineering!” Y/N nodded, making Shawn smile. She always got excited when she talked about her work and he adored her for it.

Karen hummed, staring at the girl. “Don’t you think that’s a bit far-fetched? You haven’t even gotten through college yet, why would they choose you?”

Shawn felt his anger rising already, his jaw clenching as his eyes cut up toward his mom. “Mom, I’m a high school dropout trying to be a musician. She’s doing much better than me, so I’d appreciate if you’d just drop this act.”

Everyone was shocked by his sudden outburst, the room quickly going silent once again. The dinner was over as soon as it started, and in this moment, it was like he’d never left home. His loved ones were still split and he didn’t want to choose between the two, but his family was making that hard.

He clenched his jaw and stood up from the table, grabbing his plate and motioning for Y/N to do the same.

“We’ll be in my room.”

-

“I know you want to defend me, but maybe that wasn’t a good idea.” Y/N hummed, looking up from her plate and at Shawn who was sitting in front of her on the bed. Her fork continued to lazily poke at the meatloaf Karen made as she reasoned, “We are staying in their house, after all.”

Shawn sucked at his teeth and shook his head stubbornly, “I don’t care, baby. They’re being assholes to you for no reason and I’ll live on the streets again before I let anyone disrespect you.”

She remained silent and Shawn went back to eating whatever food he had left, presuming she would do the same, but when he heard a sniffle come from her, confusion washed over him. He quickly looked up just in time to watch a single tear sliding down her cheek, her lips quivering sadly.

“No, no,” Shawn began to panic, quickly moving his plate to the bedside table and going to sit next to her. “Don’t cry- What’s wrong? Talk to me.”

More tears continued to fall by the second and Shawn pulled her into him, allowing her to wrap her arms around his middle and bury her face in his chest. Y/N didn’t hold back the sounds of her crying either, the loud sobs and heaving filling the room.

“I just don’t know what’s wrong with me,” She cried, squeezing him a little tighter. “Why don’t they like me? Why aren’t I ever enough for anyone?”

Shawn shushed her and gently pet her head, his heart hurting at the thought of her in pain. “No, please don’t say that. You’re enough for me, and when we get back on our feet, we don’t have to worry about any of this anymore. This is just a bad day, and we’ve been having a lot of those lately, but we’ll be alright.”

She stifled another cry and bit down on her lip, lifting her head to look up at him. He frowned seeing her eyelashes coated in tears and her face flushed as she clung to him.

“You promise?” She asked, voice no higher than a whisper.

He granted her a tiny smile and leaned down to kiss her nose, lingering for a few seconds before brushing a strand of hair away from her face lovingly. “I promise, Y/N. Come on, let’s go pick out your interview outfit, we gotta have you lookin’ snazzy.”

This comment elicited a giggle from her and the sound was music to his ears- Confirmation that his own words were true, and that everything would be okay.

So long as they had each other.

[roswaliens]

this is our home, this is our family

Liz and Michael find another pod. They keep an eye on it and after a few weeks it starts to move and out hatches a newborn-aged baby. 

title from Family by The Hard Aches, this is all @aliencowboys fault for giving me the idea

Read on AO3

-

Liz and Michael had taken to exploring the desert for more caves and mines in their free time. Mostly, they were looking for pieces of the ship that crashed in 1947, but they also used the time to appreciate the place they call home. They're surprised when they find another pod.

“Should we move it?” Liz asks.

“If it’s gone this long undiscovered, I think it’s better to leave it. We don’t know what will happen if we move it. I don’t want to risk it.”

“Okay,” Liz nods.

“But maybe we could set up a security camera to monitor it remotely. Keep an eye on it even when we can’t come all the way out here.”

“Good idea.”

--

Michael’s leaning over the engine of a car when his phone chimes out an alert. He wipes the grease off his hands with his shirt and checks the notification. His posture shifts when he sees it’s from the surveillance app monitoring the pod. He brings up the feed and it’s immediately obvious what triggered the alert. Where yesterday there was a life form inside the pod, today the pod was empty and there was a small baby on the cave floor.

He types out a quick text to the “Pod Squad” group chat, flips the ‘back in 15’ sign on the junkyard table on the way to his truck and guns down the road.

Liz pulls up alongside him as he arrives at the cave and they run wordlessly inside. As they draw closer to where the pod sits they hear the unmistakable sound of a baby crying and pick up their pace.

Liz reaches the baby first, not having to slow down to duck her head like Michael. She scoops it up and holds it against her chest, rocking it gently to calm its crying.

“Have you got something to wrap it in?” Liz asks.

“Here,” Michael says, shucking off his shirt and passing it to Liz.

Michael moves to the pod, gently prodding it to determine what had changed in the previous day. The pod looks the same as the ones he, Max and Isobel hatched from, complete with the perfectly intact membrane.

“Michael, come here,” Liz’s voice snaps him out of his concentration and he hears that the baby is still crying. He moves over to where Liz is standing and reacts on instinct when she passes the baby to him. He adjusts his hold to better support its head and cradles it against his chest. When he looks back up at Liz he notices the baby has quieted.

“I thought it might respond better to you,” Liz smiles. “A familiar touch.”

“You think it knows the difference?”

Liz just points at the now-settled baby.

“What do we do now?”

“I guess we have to put it in the system like they did with you,” Liz says. Michael tenses and he takes a sharp inhale. Liz must notice because she adds, “We have to go through the proper channels, but we can protect the baby this time. Max can keep an eye on them from inside the system.”

“Liz,” Michael takes a few deep breaths to steady himself and speaks slowly. “I am not putting this baby into the system.”

“Okay,” Liz nods. “Okay, we can’t stay in this cave forever, so why don’t we head back to your cabin? It’s more private than Max’s and there’s less chance of anyone dropping by unannounced. We can talk about what to do long-term from there.”

Michael nods and follows Liz out of the cave back to their cars. They walk slowly, Michael taking particular care with his steps to avoid jostling the baby in his arms. Michael’s face falls when they exit the cave and he looks at his truck.

“I don’t have a car seat.”

“Damn,” Liz agrees. She stares at their cars for a moment. Michael has learnt to let her think in silence when she gets that expression on her face. “Okay. I’ll drive your truck, you hold the baby in your lap. I’ll get Max to bring me back later to get my car.”

“Why don’t I drive and you hold the baby?” Michael suggests, holding the baby out towards Liz. The baby stirs and screws up its face in preparation for another round of crying.

“That’s why,” Liz says, pointing at the baby. Michael brings the baby back to rest against his chest and it settles again.

“Good point.” He tosses Liz his keys and gets in the passenger side.

Liz drives cautiously and Michael keeps a firm grip on the baby as it sleeps against his chest.

When they get to the cabin they’re greeted at the door by Colgate, Michael and Alex’s beagle.

“I’m going to call Kyle, I want to get a work-up done,” Liz says She closes the door behind him and leans down to give the dog a scratch behind the ears. “We don’t know how long it’s been out of the pod, I want to check for dehydration - that’s not to mention the alien stuff. Is it the same species as you, why has it hatched now, does it have powers?”

“Liz,” Michael says pointedly.

“Right, priorities,” she nods. “I’ll call Kyle, can you call Isobel? Tell her to bring formula, diapers, um, blankets, and baby clothes.”

“So just pick up everything a baby needs on her way over? Sure, no problem,” Michael rolls his eyes but still dials his phone.

--

Kyle arrives first. Isobel texted multiple photos from the baby section of Target to let them know that she was taking her task very seriously.

“That’s a baby,” Kyle says, sitting down at the kitchen table opposite Michael, who has the baby tucked into the crook of his arm.

“Great observation,” Michael snorts. “Thank you for your medical opinion.”

“Sorry. I know I should be used to weird alien crap by now, but you two finding an alien infant was not what I expected from my day when I woke up this morning.”

“Thank you for coming, Kyle,” Liz says. “Can you give her a health check? I’ve taken some blood samples, but the other stuff is beyond me.”

“I figured that’s why you called me,” Kyle nods. He rummages around in the bag he brought and pulls out a stethoscope, otoscope and several other tools, then looks up at Michael. “Are you going to be good to hold them while I do this? I know you don’t like doctors, but this shouldn’t take long.”

“I don’t have a lot of choice, if I give her to anyone else she starts crying,” Michael answers.

“She?”

“She was naked when we found her so we wrapped her in my shirt. When we got here I found her a clean blanket and we discovered that she’s a she. I mean, gender is a human construct, but for medical purposes she’s female, yes.”

Kyle nods and begins his examination by listening to her heart and lungs. He makes a few notes on a notepad and moves on to checking her eyes and ears. He checks her height, head circumference and weighs her on Alex’s bathroom scales. She’s alert throughout the process, her wide eyes following Kyle as he works.

When he’s written down his last measurements, Kyle announces to Michael, “You’ve got a healthy baby girl. I’d say somewhere between 4 and 6 weeks old based on her size. What did you find in the blood samples, Liz?”

“I compared them to samples from Michael and they’re definitely the same species. Everything else looks normal,” she answers.

“Do you need anything else from me? I can stick around until Isobel gets here if you want help with feeding or changing,” Kyle offers, packing up his medical bag.

“Thank you, but I think I’ve got it,” Michael answers.

“It’s okay to ask for help, Michael,” Liz says gently. “I’m so far out of my depth with babies.”

Michael is silent for a moment, watching the baby as she gurgles and shifts against his arm. “I actually got a lot of experience with babies as a kid,” he says, not looking up at Liz or Kyle. “Turns out some people think taking on a foster kid means they get a free babysitter.”

Kyle smiles sadly at him and collects his bag. He gives Michael a comforting clap on the shoulder as he leaves, reminding them to call him if they need anything.

--

The baby becomes increasingly unsettled as they wait for Isobel to arrive. Michael paces around the cabin trying to settle the hungry baby until they finally hear Isobel’s car pull up. Liz goes outside to help Isobel with the supplies she’s brought and rummages through the bags to find the formula and a bottle. The few minutes it takes to prepare feels like an eternity to Michael, who’s watching the baby get closer and closer to tears.

Liz tests the bottle against her arm before handing it to Michael. He settles on the couch to start feeding the baby, who drinks hungrily from the bottle. When she’s finished Michael uses one of the bibs Isobel brought to burp her easily and she lets out a yawn before closing her eyes and drifting back to sleep.

“You’re a natural,” Isobel says, breaking the silence in the room.

Michael gives a small shrug in response. Turning to the bags Isobel brought, he asks, “Diapers and clothes?”

“I brought enough supplies for a few days,” Isobel says, pointing at the bag Michael needs. “I wasn’t sure what your plans were.”

“I don’t know what our plans are. I want to do everything properly, but I want her to have a better life than we did.”

“It would have been easier if we had another alien in our lives - a good one, I mean,” she corrects herself bitterly, “to teach us about our powers and where we came from.” She pauses for a moment, thinking. “You and Alex seem pretty settled here,” she gestures to cabin around her and Colgate curled up on her bed by the fireplace. “Have you two talked about kids?”

Michael barely masks his surprise as he stammers out a reply, “that’s not- no, I don’t know- we haven’t-”

“Isobel,” Liz interrupts, saving him from answering. “Could you give me a ride back to my car? I left it out in the desert when we brought her back.”

“Sure,” Isobel agrees. The look in her eyes tells Michael their conversation is far from over.

“I’ll come back with Max when he gets off work,” Liz says. “You’ll be okay by yourself until then?”

“Yeah, we’ll be fine,” Michael nods.

He’s thankful for the quiet when Liz and Isobel leave. He searches through the rest of the bags Isobel brought one-handed, gently rocking the sleeping baby with his other arm. He had changed and dressed her while talking to Isobel, so he set the diapers and onesies aside and pulled out a blanket and a soft green alien plushie. There was a box by the table that had a capsule that would work as a makeshift cot as well as being a car seat, but it would require two hands to assemble.

Satisfied he’s got the basics covered and overwhelmed by the day’s events, Michael lays down on the couch with the baby on his chest to wait for Alex to get home. His mind is replaying what Isobel said before she left,  and with thoughts of raising this baby with Alex he drifts off.

--

Alex opens the cabin door to a sight he was not expecting to see. Michael is asleep on the couch in the living room with their beagle sleeping under his feet as they dangle over the armrest. This is not an unusual sight, but what is strange to Alex is the baby asleep on Michael’s chest.

He closes the door as quietly as he can but Michael’s eyes flicker open at the sound.

“I can explain,” Michael says.

“I got your texts,” Alex assures him. “So I get why there’s a baby. But why is it here?”

Michael sits up, gently repositioning the baby in his arms.

“She doesn’t have family, so it was either the system,” Michael shudders involuntarily at the thought, “or one of us takes her. She cried when Liz and Kyle held her, and we’ve got the space here, so I’m looking after her until we work out what to do.”

Alex nods, stepping over to the couch. He leans down and presses a chaste kiss to Michael’s lips, then runs a hand softly over the sleeping baby’s head.

“Domesticity looks good on you,” Alex smirks.

“Teaching looks good on you,” Michael replies. He uses his free hand to reach up and tug at Alex’s tie.

“Not in front of the child, Guerin,” Alex rolls his eyes, stepping out of Michael’s reach and rubbing Colgate’s belly. “You said Kyle’s been over, I take it he checked her over?”

“Yeah, she passed all of his tests. Liz took blood samples and compared them to mine, she’s definitely the same species as us.”

“What do Max and Isobel think about you finding another alien?” Alex sits down in the space Michael has made on the couch.

“Iz is… conflicted, I think. After everything with Noah, anything alien is going to make her suspicious. Max is coming over later and I have no idea what he’ll want to do.”

“Well, she can stay here as long as she needs,” Alex offers. “This cabin has always been a place for people with nowhere else to go.”

[how-to-survive-a-factory-tour]

How to Survive A Factory Tour - Chapter 10

A Sanders Sides / Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Fanfiction

PREVIOUS

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The best way I can think to describe this wonderful room is this: Wonka took Sugar Rush from Wreck it Ralph, that bit in Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs when it’s snowing ice cream, Sweet Sweet Canyon from Mario Kart, and mixed them all together onto one island. And the result is magnificent.

We’re standing on a dock by the door, and on the other side of a fizzy yellow sea is an island where everything is made from desserts. There’s a mountain which is a large tiered cake, hills that are ice cream scoops, and - if my expert Disney park knowledge serves me correctly - a volcano in the centre that is the volcano dessert from the Rainforest Café.

“Did I die? Because I think I’m in heaven…” Patton mumbles, eyes wide and sparkling.

Wonka hops into a small rowing boat with just enough room for all six of us. The rest of us all join him, and he starts rowing us across the sea to the island.

“Just like before, you are free to roam about yourselves. However, can you head to the east beach after fifteen to twenty minutes? There’s something exciting I want to show you.”

Patton leans over the side of the boat, dipping his finger into the yellow sea. He pulls it out, trying a little. “It’s lemonade!”

“Right you are!” Wonka responds. “The fizziest, tastiest lemonade in the world.”

Almost to punctuate the ‘fizziest’ part, Patton lets out a small burp. “Oops, sorry…”

“It must be rather powerful if Patton burped after such a small amount…” Logan speaks up. “Is it actually safe to consume larger volumes?”

“Of course! Nothing leaves the Inventing Room until it is perfect. The lemonade has been thoroughly tested,” Wonka assures.

I dip my finger to try some lemonade as well. However, as I do, I swear I see a dark shadow in the water…

Eh, it’s probably just the boat creating a shadow.

I sit back up, tasting the lemonade, and letting my own little burp out.

“Wow, Princey, didn’t expect you to be so uncouth,” Virgil smirks.

“Princey? Hm… I like it. Keep calling me that.”

Virgil just rolls his eyes.

“So we can just try anything like last time?” Patton asks, receiving a nod from Wonka in response.

“Nothing’s taboo, like the river in the last room?” Logan inquires.

“Nothing at all. No accidents have occurred in this room ever, and I trust you to be responsible enough to keep it that way.”

The boat pulls up onto the beach of the island. Wonka hops out, and we follow suit, the sand crunching under our feet. Patton seems to have taken the designated role of taste tester, leaning down and picking up a handful of sand, before pouring it in his mouth. “Crushed up graham crackers!”

“Correct again,” Wonka nods. “Now, go ahead, you five, you can go explore.”

Once again, like the Chocolate Room, we all go running ‍off. Patton’s trying a little bit of everything we come across. Virgil does the same, only going a bit slower than Patton. Logan takes a seat by a bush growing ice cream sandwiches, picking one off and eating. I walk around a little longer, before finding a large angel cake. I use a nearby chocolate shard as a knife and cut a slice, before going back to sit by Logan.

“I saw you getting all flustered over Pat on the boat,” I tell him. “You should really just tell him how you feel. By the end of the day, it’ll be too late. You have limited time.”

Logan sighs. “I know… I was going to earlier, but the flume on the boat ride ruined the moment.”

“You could do it on the beach,” I suggest. “Beaches are classic confession/proposal venues in romantic movies. And Patton said this room is his personal heaven, what could be a better time? Perfect romantic mood for you two.”

“I guess you’re right… Okay. I won’t chicken out again. I’m going to take Patton to the beach and confess my feelings. Surely it cannot be that diffi-“

“LO!!!” Patton suddenly runs over, and I think, based off his wide eyes and inability to stay still, bouncing on the balls of his feet, it’s pretty obvious he currently has a very bad sugar high. “You have to come over here, there’s a milk and cookies lagoon and it’s really really really cool!” He grabs Logan’s wrist, and drags him off before the other can say anything.

I chuckle at the two of them. They are two of the worst disaster gays I’ve ever met - they’re perfect for each other.

“I see Patton’s kidnapped Logan…” Virgil’s voice catches my attention as he comes over and sits beside me, eating a flapjack. 

“Yep. Those two are so cute together… I can’t wait to find my soulmate like those two have…”

“Ah, so you’re one of those kinda of people who believe in soulmates?”

“Of course! Don’t you?”

Virgil considers it, before shrugging. “Dunno. Never really had time to think about romance or boyfriends or anything. I’ve been too focused on work and saving money for that. The closest thing I’ve gotten to a love life is judging my friend, Elliot’s choice in men.”

“Boyfriends? I’m sensing a very non-straight theme with us tour members…”

“We don’t know about Ethan,” Virgil points out, but I shake my head.

“My gaydar is very powerful. He’s definitely gay. I mean, he’s wearing a bow tie and suspenders by choice, casually.”

“True… Hey, about Ethan, I think something’s off with him… I saw him whispering into some bushes back in the Chocolate Room. It was kinda weird.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Kinda? Sounds like a bit more than kinda… Or maybe he was just talking to one of the Oompa Loompas? They’re pretty short, maybe you didn’t see them because they were stood behind the bush.”

“Maybe… I dunno, Ethan just kinda creeps me out.”

“Wow, I wonder why. Maybe it’s because half his face is that of a snake!”

Virgil shoves my arm, rolling his eyes, yet smiling. I grin back at him.

“You do that a lot. Come on, you love me really.”

Virgil crosses his arms, huffing, but still smiling. “Piss off…”

I pout, resting my chin on his shoulder. “I’m sowwy, Viwgwil. Pwease forgive me.”

“Jesus, I’m not going to forgive you when you’re doing owo speak!”

“Actually, I was doing uwu speak. Very different.” I pause. “Wait, how do you know what owo speak is? I thought you didn’t have a phone or internet.”

Virgil shrugs. “I’m friends with Remy. One of the things he does on his daily coffee shop runs is teach me current memes and internet trends.”

“Huh. Remy’s pretty cool… He single?”

“Aro.”

“Darn… Oh well. The process of elimination brings me one step closer to finding my soulmate.”

Virgil chuckles. “You are aware there are, like, over seven billion people on earth. Process of elimination isn’t gonna get you very far.”

“Well, actually, half those people are eliminated because they’re female. Another bunch because their too old or young. Another bunch because they’re straight. Another bunch because they’re looking for sexual relationships as well, which I cannot provide. Another bunch because they’re aro. That leaves a small percentage of people who could be my soulmate.”

“Well, I wish you the best of luck, because it is going to take you forever to find them.” Virgil says, before reaching over and stealing a bit of my angel cake. I glare at him, before leaning over and taking a bite of his flapjack. “Hey!”

“Revenge, bitch!”

Virgil glares at me. I don’t realise he’s picked up a nearby cream pie until he slams it onto my face.

I pull it away and lick my lips. “Oh, it’s on.”

-

Ohmygodohmygodohmygod! I LOVE this room!

I’m knelt at the side of a lagoon of milk, dipping cookies in it and munching on them after. They’re so good! Even better than the ones Ma makes, and that’s saying something, because her’s are amazing! 

Anyway, I keep happily eating the food that graced so many of my childhood bedtimes, and I look down to where Logan is sat on the beach, looking at a small stream coming off the lagoon and going off into the lemonade ocean. “You okay, LoLo?”

“Yeah, I’m just looking at this stream. It’s extraordinary… The milk from the lagoon somehow changes to lemonade as it reaches the ocean, avoiding cross-contamination. How does it do that…?”

Awww, he’s so nerdy and curious, it’s adorable! I just wanna go over and hug him tight, and never ever ever let go, and-

Is it possible to get drunk on sugar? Because I think I might be. Just an ickle little tiny bit.

Anyway, more cookies!

“You know, Logi,” I say between bites, “you should really try that lemonade. It’s sooooo good!”

Logan looks down at the sea for a moment. “I am curious as to the effects of having a larger volume.” He scoops up some lemonade, drinking it from his hands. He wipes his mouth after. “Wow, Mr Wonka was not lying about the fizz… I already feel gassy.”

I chuckle. “You look it too. Look at your tummy!”

Logan looks down, seeing is stomach is distended. Oh! I used a smart word! ‘Distended’!

“... Okay, if that amount did that to my stomach, there is no way higher volumes can be safe,” Logan says, patting his stomach. However, doing so causes him to let out a belch, which in turn makes his stomach go down. He blushes, putting a hand over his mouth. “Oh, um, excuse me…”

I, on the other hand, burst into giggles. “Sorry, I know burp jokes and potty humour are childish, but it always makes me laugh…!”

Logan smiles. He pauses, before shuffling over and sitting beside me. “Are the cookies nice?”

I nod. “They’re even better than the lemonade! Here, try!” I pick up a cookie, dunk it in the lagoon, and shove it in Logan’s mouth.

He chuckles, biting down on the cookie. “Hm. They are pretty good.”

“Pretty good? More like the best things ever!”

Logan just shrugs. “I personally think Crofters is much better.”

“Crofters?”

“It’s a Canadian jam brand, and my absolute most favourite food in the universe. It’s so sweet and delicious, yet is completely organic. It’s even better than the jam Wonka makes.”

“Sounds nice! I’ll have to try it out sometime!”

“You should. It’s to die for.”

We sit around a little longer, eating cookies and just talking. I tell him about my job at the bakery, and different recipes I’ve come up with. He tells me about his college and classes. I don’t understand a lot of what he tells me, but I don’t mind. It’s nice to just hear him talk… He gets so passionate when he talks about learning and school…

God, he’s perfect. Maybe I should just kiss him now… Kiss his soft, perfect lips…

“Patton?”

“Huh? Oh, sorry, I got distracted… What is it, Lo?”

“I, um… I wanted to tell you something…” He takes a deep breath, before reaching over and taking my hand. My own breath catches in my throat. I look back up, and meet his eyes.

“Patton… I know we only met yesterday, but I really really-“

“Excuse me, you two, but it’s been twenty minutes, we need to go meet Mr Wonka on the east beach.”

Logan curses under his breath, before turning and looking up at Ethan, who stands over us. “Thank you for informing us, Ethan. We had better get going.”

Logan stands, pulling his hand from mine. My face falls a little, but I push it aside for now, hopping to my feet and following him and Ethan to the Eastern side of the island.

After a bit of walking, Roman and Virgil join us. Logan raises an eyebrow at their food covered clothes. “What happened to you two?”

“Dessert War,” they respond in unison.

“You mean a food fight?” Ethan asks.

“It was too intense to just be a fight,” Roman replies.

“Who won?”

“Well… technically there wasn’t a winner, we just kinda stopped when Roman got a dark stain on his crop top and screamed that it cost a lot, so we stopped,” Virgil explains. “Which, if you forfeited, actually means I won!”

“Oh, you did not, I landed more hits!”

“Bullshit! That doesn’t determine the winner!”

“Does!”

“Doesn’t!”

“Does!”

“Doesn’t!”

That’s basically the rest of the conversation all the way to the eastern beach.

----------

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