#Yes this is still about my Samifer fic I'm taking custody of Nick Mary and Jody too

[19catsncounting]

Mary Winchester being the world's first 33 year old failmom who is also in her 60's was revolutionary. But I feel like Supernatural really missed the mark on her also being a Country Mom when she's not committing spree killings with her imported sociopathic boytoy.

She should have been obsessed with phone apps. Candy Crush and Words with Friends knockoffs, not even the real app because she thinks it's just like getting the generic brand at the grocery store to save a few cents.

She checks a Daily Devotional website every morning and despite having a literal Angel of God sitting next to her at the breakfast table, sometimes she reads a scripture and mutter "Oh that's nice," thinking it's God's way of communicating with her. Instead of asking his wholeass son to pass along the message.

She reads the cowboy romance novels, the ones that are So Straight And Christian that it's crossed the threshold into kink material. Widower Derrick with his 3,000 acre ranch, his three sons named Ezekiel and a daughter who loves pink and misses her mama, asks Annette Mae to pray with him because he's tempted by the devil to hold her hand without her father's permission, and Mary is eating that shit up with a spoon. Since she's been scooped out of the early 80's into the 2010's, she also has no immunity to cringe Hallmark movies.

As a product of the 70's as well as Kansas, Mary Winchester Is Not Immune To Big Silver-Laid Turquoise Bangles.

Chicken Soup for the Soul, a publication that has not actually been in print since 2012, magically appears on gas station reading racks when she and Cas are on the road. When she reads an emotional testimonial in them, she just tells the nearest person about it then says "It really makes you think," instead of crying.

She never said "Bless your heart" in the show because it would have been more potent than an F-bomb. It's basically the fastest demon-killing spell in the universe.

All I'm saying is that she could still be totally inept at being emotionally available with her grown-ass sons and still have a stronger personal connection to the Pioneer Woman than Sam and Dean combined.