#YOU CAN'T FIND ANY DAMN EPISODE ANYWHERE ANYMORE

[toasthoneyandstardust]

I completely forgot I figured out how to record time lapses on CSP and that I tested it out with my recent poster art!

Here's the video for any of you that's interested, unfortunately I can't reblog the art with a video, so it's got its own post!

[jacksoneblackburn]

My parentage is changing.

A fanfic of my own character that kinda goes into the lore of my character, altering the story to where they have multiple personalities inspired by the schizophrenic episodes of the Greco-Roman gods (and ofc @bright-side-of-the-moon)

Chapter 1: Will loses track of a patient.

IT WAS A DAY LIKE NO OTHER.

I was doing rounds- checking I was stocked on bandages, my list of patients with allergies, my medicine was stocked, I had plenty nectar and ambrosia, watering my sunflower given to me as a welcome gift by Will Solace when I got claimed, playing my morning playlist of Conan Gray, Olivia Rodrigo, Em Beihold, Claire Rosinkranz, Camilla Cabello- the usual.

Until I get interrupted by a knock on my office door.

I stop playing my music and head to the door, opening it with slight annoyance.

"Yeah? Who is it-"

"Hey, sorry Jacks, I know you're doing rounds but... we have a medical emergency in cabin 3," The person said. It was my freckled, suntanned, tall, blond brother. Will Solace. He was never good at telling me when there was medical emergencies. Especially during the morning.

"I can't help them," I sigh. "I was just about to reorganize my files in alphabetical order again-"

"Well- I- uhh- As Head Counselor slash Medic, I demand you go check on your patient!" He said, puffing out his chest and pointing a finger in the air.

I just stared at him for a while.

"It's been a week and you're pulling that card on me?"

"Just go down-"

"No."

"Pleeeease?"

"Hmm.... no."

"I'll give you unlimited access to all patient files."

"Where's the camper?" I throw on my lab coat.

"New that would getcha."

"I need blackmail on the Stoll brothers, I take wins where I can get them." I adjust something slightly out of place on my coat then walk past Will.

Will shrugs. "Fair enough."

We walk towards the strawberry fields, making small talk on the way. You know, the usual.

"How many people died last week?" I ask nonchalantly, as if death doesn't bother me anymore.

"Surprisingly, one," Will says while stepping over a mushroom that looked like it was on the verge of exploding. "He fell off of the rock climbing wall."

"Was he drunk?"

"Nope."

"Was he wearing any safety gear?"

"Also, nope."

"Well no duh, it's written on a giant sign to wear the proper equipment with supervision if you want to climb on the wall," I hop over a loose root in the ground. "It's literally the number one rule."

"It was an Ares kid."

"Okay, that makes much more sense."

We make it to the fields, with no one to be seen. Nobody. Anywhere, no matter where you looked. Not a single Satyr, bug, or demigod.

"Uh... Will?" I turn to him and bat my eyes. "Where's. The. Damn. Patient."

"How should I know?!"

"YOU'RE THE HEAD MEDIC. THAT'S YOUR JOB."

"NUH-UH- wait, no. You actually have a point. Am I gonna get fired?" Will was panicking, I was pissed, and we have a missing (probably dying, let's be honest) patient that's nowhere to be seen. "Oh gods, what do I tell Nico?!-"

"Calm down. You find that patient, before Chiron and Mr. D have your practicing license for a month. I'll go ask any nearby campers if they seen anyone..." I pause for a moment. "What did you say this patient looked like again?"

"I- uh.... Girl, very pretty, smelled like-"

"Let me remind you, you have a boyfriend that I know very well."

"Shut up," Will's face taking on the same hue of the strawberry milk served at lunch. "As I was saying, she was a daughter of Aphrodite. She was supposedly having a heat stroke-"

"Why would a child of Aphrodite be all the way out here in the Strawberry fields?" I interrupt. "Sorry, my bad. Please continue."

"-That caused her to pass out," Will continued, albeit, very annoyed. "She was saying something about needing water, and a Cabin Three kid went to the lake to purify some water for her to drink."

"That all?"

"No, she passed out and... well... You know the story from there."

I hum in thought. Being the gremlin I am, I walk away back to my office. "If she's not here, that means she's okay, or someone else is already treating her. Now about those medical documents-"

"What." Will said incredulously. "Not even gonna look for her?- What if there's a dead camper on my hands, and you just walk away?"

I nod. "Pretty much, yeah."

Will stares at me, dumbfounded and slowly getting more and more pissed off. "You're a terrible medic."

"If there's no patient to treat, there's no problem to meet." Ignoring Will's comment, I continue walking away. "I need to finish my rounds."

"You're fired."

I stop dead in my tracks, slowly turning around. "What?"

"You. Are. Fired"

"Y-you can't fire me?!" I walk up to him. "Only-"

"I don't care. Go to the Hermes cabin. And stay there. You're license is officially revoked."

"W-what..." I mumble, terrified. "Y-you can't do this to me- you're taking away my entire purpose-"

"That's the point," He folded his arms, towering over me, the damn Texan. "Get out my damn sight before I do something I regret."

"B-but my documents... My patients- You- you can't do this to me!"

"You are dismissed."

I felt the tension build up in my chest. My grip on my reality slipping away. The tears welling up in my eyes, burning hotter than any of the forges in Cabin 9. My breath became warm, my throat closing up and becoming dry as the tears fall off of my cheeks like rain. My nose and cheeks redder than any strawberry in the field.

I grip onto Will's shirt, falling to my knees and crying into Will's shirt. "P-please W-Will.... D-don't do this...." I sob.

"You have till the Harpies come out to move." Will said coldly, walking past me. Muttering and mumbling to himself to calm himself down as I slowly fall to the floor. Curling into a ball and clutching my stomach as my tears turn the dirt underneath my face slowly turning to mud with my tears.

So that was chapter 1 !!

Thank you so much for reading and I really hope you enjoyed!

A like would be greatly appreciated because it really supports me (you don't have to if you don't want to) :]

[eldritchsurveys]

1242.

When are you at your happiest? >> When I'm in a cuddle pile with Can Calah and King Crimson.

Do you find that you’re attracted to people who aren’t “right” for you? >> I'm not attracted to anyone on this plane of reality. I am dying to know what it feels like.

Is there anything you wish you did today? >> Actually, I did more than I expected to. I maybe could have done the dishes in my bus bin but I am okay with the fact that I still haven't summoned the energy for it.

Why haven’t you done it? . What were you doing before you started this survey? >> Well, I was looking for a survey to take, which lately always seems to take more time than I would like. Before that, I was watching an episode of Chernobyl.

Is there any exotic animal you’d like to have as a pet? If so, what is it? >> There is not.

Can you honestly say that you love yourself? >> I can honestly say that.

How many people have you kissed? >> Simultaneously too many and not enough.

How many of those people are you still friends with? >> I don't know any of the people we've kissed anymore, save for Sparrow.

Do you just feel awkward when you dance? >> I don't, I feel... ecstatic. When I get in the groove, in the moment... it's transcendent to me. But only if it's nonstructured, freeform dance. If I have to start thinking about steps or moves or whatever, the mood becomes way different. When was the last time you felt absolutely happy? >> Probably at some point during a really intense moment with Can Calah.

Where did you go, the last time you left your house? >> I just went for a walk.

Name someone that you love: >> Can Calah.

Is there something that you’re looking forward to right now? If so, what? >> Whenever Sparrow's financial aid refund comes in so we can actually buy groceries. God, what a charmed life, huh. What caused you to cry, the last time you did? >> Loneliness, but specifically the feeling of desperately needing support and knowing it just doesn't exist for me.

Do you think you spend too much time feeling upset? >> I don't spend too much time feeling upset, I spend as much time as the feeling requires. The world does an excellent job of being judgmental towards emotions and trying to hurry them along, but I'm not interested in that anymore. I will be in agony regardless, but I'll be in less of it if I stop trying to run away from it.

Is there anywhere you would rather be right now? If so, where? >> Always. Just somewhere that's not here.

Do you like your singing voice? >> Eh, I haven't seriously practiced singing since high school and HRT permanently changed my range (or at least the expression of my range), so my singing voice is rusty at best. I still enjoy singing, though, so that doesn't really matter. No one said I had to be good at it to have a good time. (A lot of people say that, actually, or at least imply it. They're wrong, though.) Do you think that you’ve ever actually been IN love with someone? >> I, personally, have not. Previous body pilots... I don't know. The body's memories are unclear on that front. If so, do you still feel the same way about them? .

Have you ever done a psychedelic drug? If not, would you ever consider it? >> I haven't done a proper psychedelic. I am interested, but because of my previous drug-use trauma it'd need to be in a very supportive setting, with at least one experienced trip sitter or guide or whatever around.

What’s something that makes you feel uncomfortable? >> Seatbelts.

Are you bisexual? >> I am xenosexual. Human gender doesn't factor into my potential for attraction.

Are you a good speller? >> Very.

Are most silences awkward for you? >> Hardly any silences are awkward for me, unless the other person is clearly uncomfortable in a way that my hypervigilant nervous system picks up on. Then I'm just annoyed at their discomfort, lol. Can't we just vibe?

Do you sing and dance? >> Damn skippy. Have you ever been to an amusement park? >> I have.

Name someone you wish you had never met: .

Why? . Do you have any “nerdy” hobbies? If so, name some: >> I don't feel like trying to figure out what makes a hobby "nerdy". Name a word that you just really do not like: >> "Wholesome". Ew.

Why don’t you like it? >> I don't know. I'm okay with just having random word aversions that I can't explain. It might be connected to my distaste for mawkishness, and people tend to use "wholesome" in such a fashion. Do you still seriously make pinky promises? >> I don't recall if I've ever made any. Did you ever see the movie Good Burger when it came out? >> I still haven't seen it. I doubt I ever will.

Do you and your friends have a lot of inside jokes? .

What’s your favorite aspect of your life? >> I love being strange and unusual. That part never stops being great, even when it sometimes contributes to my feelings of alienation.

Do people tell you that you should smile more? >> Fortunately, I don't remember the last time I heard this stupid ass sentiment.

Do you prefer summer to winter? >> I do. I don't have anything against winter, but my body/nervous system sure does.

Do you use swear words? >> I do.

If so, do you have a favorite one? >> I like funny combinations of words, like "fucknugget" or "shitass". It's just silly :B

What’s something you find utterly disgusting? >> I don't even want to think about the things I find disgusting, that's how disgusting I find them. Are you easily angered? >> I am not, but I am easily irritated.

What’s something someone could do to really piss you off? >> Be dismissive or mocking towards me when I'm being vulnerable. I'll fucking kill you <3

Do you spend a lot of time just thinking/daydreaming? >> I do spend more time thinking than I'd sometimes like to (ruminating, more like), but not nearly enough time daydreaming.

Name a song you’ve really been digging lately: >> I got into Rotting Christ recently. Good shit.

Are you a virgin? If yes, are you waiting until marriage? >> I am not.

Who has the nicest singing voice, that you know personally? .

Say something nice about someone you really don’t care for: .

Do you think you’re pleasant to be around most of the time? >> I think that it takes a particular sort of person to find me pleasant to be around. (I don't think this is a bad thing. I like that about myself, that I'm singular in a way that only certain people would appreciate, despite how much rejection is involved.)

What are you gonna do now that you’re done with this survey? >> See what's going on on tumblr, I guess. Maybe another survey a bit later? Haven't been doing these much lately, too much going on with me that makes me just want to zone out and play FFXIV for 6 hours straight.

[i-like-sparkly-things]

Beautiful?

A Halstead!Sister

'But they don't know. They don't know what it's like to be you. They didn't know what it was like to wake up everyday, to a body you never asked for.

A body nobody wanted.'

Warnings : eating disorder, body insecurities, body dismorphia

Requested : Yup, by anon , 'could u do a fic where she has an eating disorder? and doesn’t tell jay but then one day she passes out at school and has to tell him?'

Word count : 1.7k

Note : this took too long I don't know why 😭but yall Guess who's thankful that yall bear with my English ? me. :) and ps this is my first request!! And yall please please know that all of you are so freaking beautiful and worth fighting for. Know that you are loved and it is never, ever weak to ask for help.

**************************

The constant pain and sleepless nights were paying off. Your eyes sparkled when you saw your new numbers. It was working.

You took your diary, crossing out breakfast on the to do list after eating a banana.

This was going to be simple. check what you eat, check your weight and repeat . You knew that if you tried really hard, you would be the one in control.

Control. That's all you wanted. Such an easy, yet painful thing.

You looked to the mirror, as your hands hovered over your ribs sticking to the skin . You'd never felt so beautiful in your life. But your eyes roamed down to your thighs. The flesh of your legs were touching. It wasn't enough.

It was never enough.

'' Y/n , come on ! Move your ass! I need to get to work!! '' Jay shouted for you, from downstairs.

'' Shut uppp I'm comingg'', you yelled back.

Ever since your mom had died, dad always kept to himself leading you to stay with your brothers. It had become a routine. Jay  would drop you off at school and Annie's mom would give you a ride home.

Lucky for you , Jay was constantly busy with cases. He hadn't noticed your new diet or the mood swings.

**************************

Your teacher had started the lesson. And slowly you sensed something wrong. Your head was pounding. God why is she so blurry? You look to Anne sitting next to you and she's Blurry too. You felt your body giving up to the swaying ground.

'' y/n!! '' Annie shreiked as your limp body crashed to the floor.

****************************

'' Chuckles!? '' Trudy called out,climbing the stairs to intelligence. "Do I look like a cocktail waitress to you? Where have you been??"

"Morning to you too, sarge" Jay sighed. "and its detective"

" Well , Detective , Y/n fainted at school and wanted you to pick her up"

"What ?" he asked shocked, aldready beginning to pick up his jacket.

"Sarge" he said, looking to Voight for approval, although he would leave nonetheless. "Go."

*****************************

"Mr. Halstead" the school nurse addressed him, as he entered the clinic.

"Call me jay. Y/n, are you okay? what the hell happened?" he asked you worried.

You had never fainted before and apart from the flu every couple of years, you had a clean bill of health, as far as he knew.

"Jay, I promise I'm fine. Just got a little dizzy, that's all" you answered knowing how overprotective he can get. Now all you could hope for was that he would let this slide.

"I tried getting some food in her but she told me she was fine" the nurse explained to Jay.

God No. the the salad she offered you had so many calories.  you had made too much progress nothing was going to stop you especially a simple fainting episode. It was a minor setback but you were sure you could continue your weight loss diet.

" What, WHY? " he questioned, but just  as you were thinking of a better reply " You know what, I'm gonna take her home." he interrupted your thoughts as he spoke to the nurse.

" Only if you are sure, you're good"

" I am Jay. One hundred percent." you replied, happy to skip the rest of the school day.

It's not like you've been paying attention any ways. You'd zone out a lot during class and  your constant hunger and cramps didn't help either. But you drowned these feelings away with small sips of water and occasional slices of cucumbers.

You Craved the Emptiness. the feeling of being lighter. The feeling of being....... perfect. It was intoxicating.

Taking your school bag, Jay wrapped a study arm around your shoulders , guiding you through the school corridors and towards his truck.

"God, I can't wait to go to bed", You said climbing the truck and fastening your seat belt.

"Yeah right. I'm taking you to med" he stated. "WHAT? Jay, what the hell ? I told you, I'm fine!!"

You knew Will was working and didn't want either of your brothers to know about your new diet or how much weight you had lost. It was too late to quit. The disgusting image in the mirror was slowly getting better..... getting thinner, prettier.

"You've never fainted before Y/n, and I promise I'll get Will to run the exams and do all the tests" he assured you.

****************************

"Y/n, I thought I told you I never wanted to see you here again.", Maggie greeted, pointing a finger at you.

"Awwww  but I missed you", you pouted, " No don't do that. your brother's waiting in treatment room 3 so you better get going." she instructed and you dropped your school bag near the nurses station.

You and Jay enter the room, to a very worried Will. "Y/n, what happened?" he asked , gesturing you to sit on the bed.

"did you hit your head when you fell? Did you fall in the bathroom or something like that?", he continued, not giving you time to answer.

"what did the nurses say? are you stressed about school?" " Will-", you interrupted his rambling " I'm fine, just..... got a little dizzy."

You watched , as he took his pen light to your eyes. "Ah! Will, stop!!" You said, trying and failing to refrain him.

"You know, it'll be easier if you stop squirming" Jay commented with a smug smile. "Your not going anywhere"

"Shut up" you groaned.

You need to get out of here. What if they gave you food. What if they found out you were hungry all the time. They'd never stop making fun of you. They'd tell you that you were overreacting and that all this was so unnecessary.

But they didn't know. They didn't know what it was like to be you. They didn't have floppy arms or fleshy thighs. They didn't know what it was like to wake up everyday, to a body you never asked for. A body nobody wanted.

******************************

"Jay" Will called out, seeing him outside your room. It had been a couple of hours since you were bought in.

Will had ordered some tests, being the ass he was.

Wonderful. You just hoped that all the tests would be normal and you could get the hell out of there.

"yeah man? just needed to text Hailey, Why, what's wrong?" Jay asked, studying the worried expression on his brother's face

"It's Y/n. "

***************************

You were fiddling with the hem of your t-shirt when your brother's walked in, staring at you, as if you were a ghost.

"Y/n," Jay croaked out his voice laced with dread, "how long?"

No. No. No. This can't be happening. God, you knew that they were going to hate you forever.

"what the are you talking about?" you needed to try to get them to back away."Is something wrong?"

They were standing on either side of your bed. Jay came closer and sat down on your right the beside your knees, eyes never leaving yours.

"Your tests-" Will started, "They came back showing you have severe deficiencies. That your body is struggling to survive. That it's not getting enough food." he broke away from your gaze.

"We um-" Jay, as if almost on queue, continued."We looked through your school bag and found your diary. "

You sucked in a sharp breath and shook your head. No. He knew. They knew.

All your calorie counts, the amount of calories you can have in a day, your research on diets, workouts, to do lists, hell, even your Period Tracker was written down. (although you barely had it anymore)

That book was the reason you were finally becoming happy with yourself. Your body.

'I'm sorry', you mouthed "I'm so, so sorry" This was it. Your voice hitched, as tears flowed down your cheeks. "I was finally happy"

In an instant, your brothers were by your side.

Jay engulfed you into his chest, your words circling his mind. 'Finally?' God, you lived together! You were his sister! His baby sister! How could he have let this happen to you? How could he not have noticed that you were drowning? That you were starving yourself. What kind of brother was he?

Will rubbed your back, until your sobs became quieter. He was a doctor. A damn doctor! God knows how long this has been going on, but at the end of the day.... he failed. He failed to be there,..... when you needed him.

"Y/n, you don't have to do this. You're beautiful Y/n. You really are. And I'm sorry that anyone else has convinced in otherwise" Jay breathed out, hoping you heard him, in his embrace.

"It felt good, Jay" your voice was muffled by his shirt, but to your brothers, your voice was loud and clear.

"Did it?" You turned to Will, "Did the hunger feel good?" his heart broke saying the words out loud.

'Yes', you wanted to answer. Of course it felt good. You were getting so many compliments from your friends at school. Boys started acknowledging you now.

It was like you finally existed. You felt...... worthy.

But with all the strength you could muster up, you couldn't get the words out. Because there was always one voice that told you to quit. The voice you'd been drowning out for so long. The voice that told you, that you were in fact, beautiful.

Your mother's.

"No" you said, realizing that Will had tears in his eyes as well.

But you couldn't find a hint of shame in them, no matter how much you searched. Instead, you were met with the immense worry and guilt of your brother.

"We can help, Y/n" Will said, as he took your hand in his, "We will help and we'll be there every step of the way."

"Every step" Jay assured and you turned to him. "All you need to do, is let us in"

You weren't prepared for this. You had no idea what to say.

You didn't want to feel tired all the time, always craving for food. But the idea of going back - back to all that shame - that's what scared you.

"Y/n," Will spoke up, seeing as you were struggling to answer, "I promise you, we are going to make you feel better...... and we'll fight those thoughts of yours together."

You took a shaky breath.

Thoughts.

Your thoughts.

You had let them consume you for a long time now. Too long. maybe..... Maybe the right voice to follow, was your mothers'. "okay-" you sobbed, "okay", and once again you found yourself in Jay's arms.

You, clinging to him like your life depended on it and him holding you tight, because it did. His hand rested on your head, tangled with your hair.

Will saw a tear make its way down his brothers cheek, something he hasn't witnessed often.

Your brothers sat silently, listening to you cry. Taking in the conversation, only having a glimpse of the pain you were in.

You had a long, long road ahead but as you sat in your brother arms, you felt a sense of peace, comfort maybe.

******************************

Masterlist

[i-used-to-wear-the-fedora]

Stranger Things/The Black Phone, Dead Air

Gwen Blake was thirteen years old when her brother went missing. She remembered the day when the police showed up to her friend's house to tell her. The girl wandering out to the side of the road in disbelief.

"We believe he was taken by The Grabber."

The detective said. Before that it didn't feel real to her. All those boys who had been going missing. They never found their bodies. They never found Finney. She was fourteen when she felt it. Like a part of her died. The girl sitting up straight in bed and screaming from pain. That was the night she knew, Finney was dead.

Her father didn't believe her. She tried to tell him, God did she try but no one listened to her. Not him, not the police, not anyone. Instead Gwen found herself alone, isolated from everyone around her. People were scared of the things she said she could see. Her father stopped getting angry with her about it and instead drowned himself even further in the alcohol. Most days the man wouldn't even get up from the couch he was so drunk.

The girl was eighteen when she came home one day to find him laid out on the floor, his face a nasty shade of blue. According to the paramedics he'd passed out after getting drunk before choking to death on his own vomit. Gwen knew she probably should've been more sad than she was when they told her that. He was a shit person and a terrible dad. Yet despite her dislike of the man she found herself falling into similar habits. Coming home from her job at the local supermarket and drinking alcohol to numb the pain and the voices in her head. She didn't care if they were real or not anymore.

Gwen Blake was twenty when the phone on the wall began to ring. Looking away from the episode of Magnum playing on the TV, the young woman looked at the clock to see it was almost seven thirty and frowned. Who the hell would be calling this time of day? Reluctantly she got off the couch and picked up the phone annoyed.

"Hello?" There was a pause on the other end of the line before the sound of shuffling pages.

"Ugh hi, is this the Blake household?" A male voice that Gwen didn't recognize asked.

"Depends," the young woman leaned against the wall as she spoke, "Who's asking?"

Before there was an answer, the shrieking noise of static made her take the receiver away from her ear.

"Hello?" She repeated again, thinking maybe the line dropped when a new voice cut through.

"Gwen?" It had been seven years but she'd know that voice anywhere.

"...Finney?" Her grip on the phone tightened at her brother's voice.

"I'm cold Gwen." His voice shook as the young woman found herself frozen in place. "It's so cold here. We can't leave."

"What? Finney where are you? What are you talking about?" This wasn't right. If Finney was still alive, he wouldn't sound like he did back in middle school. And who was the other person?

"Seven."

"What?"

"Seven. Seven. Four. One."

"Seven-Finney, what the hell is going on?" The static over the phone crackled before there was a loud pop in her ear and she dropped the phone on shock. Quickly picking it up again, she tried to recall the number but there wasn't any dial tone. Looking down, Gwen saw the phone line disconnected from the wall. "...what the hell was that?"

~~

"Jesus-fuck!" Steve jumped at the shock sent through his fingers. Dropping the phone in the progress as smoke began to emit from the device. One minute he was listening to a one sided conversation, the next the machine was totally fried. Along with the lights and everything else electric in the living room. Experimentally flipping the light switch he found it had been blown out.

"Damn it." The young man cursed. 'Gonna have to call an electrician.' Steve made a mental note with a groan. 'Dad's going to kill me when he sees the bill for this.' Navigating the darkness towards the main staircase, Steve's eyes slowly began to adjust when he saw something move out of the corner of his eye. For a moment Steve considered investigating it but decided against it with a shake of his head. "Nope. Nuh uh, not tonight." He told himself and continued his trek upstairs, his head wound making his head ring. Going to his room and locking the door behind him. Collapsing on his pinstripe bedsheets with a loud huff, allowing his mind to finally turn off and drift into the realm of sleep.

~~

"-look like you can use a ride."

Steve's eyes opened to see a man in a white mini van parked beside him with the passenger side window rolled down.

"Ugh, what?" Steve asked confused. His voice sounded different.

"I said, you look like you can use a ride. Pretty rude for the cops to just leave you out here alone in the middle of the night." The man said. His face was blurry. Trying to focus on his features, all Steve could make out was a large pair of sunglasses covering his face. "Come on, you're Loretta's kid right? You're house is just on the way over to my brother's place."

Something was off about this...about everything really. Yet the body Steve found himself in seemed to move on autopilot. Opening the passenger door and getting in. The man putting the car into drive as he began to turn onto a side street. Questions ringing through Steve's mind as he wondered how he ended up here. Looking down at his body, he was surprised by the smaller arms. Experimentally lifting the one wearing a rope bracelet up and waving it around.

"So what happened? You get in trouble rough housing?" The man asked. "Look a little worse for wear." Steve didn't say anything, instead staring at the blurry faced man.

"What are you, a clown or something?" His voice, which he wasn't even sure was his, asked. The man chuckled at the question.

"No silly, I'm a magician." Steve's mouth snorted at the answer. "I could show you a magic trick."

"I'm a little old for that kind of shit." Steve said as he glanced out the window. Feeling a frown cross his face as they passed a sign that read Oak Lanes. "Hey-you missed the turn off." The man was quiet, continuing to drive without glancing at him. Steve noticed the man's foot starting to press down harder on the gas pedal. "Hey! Dipshit, are fucking deaf? I said you missed the turn."

"That's some naughty language. If I were your mother, I'd make you wash that dirty mouth of yours with a bar of soap."

What the fuck was up with this guy? Steve could feel the dude's creep meter rising by the second. The car pulled off to a gravel side road with no building in sight. Steve watched the creep put the car into park before he turned to face the young man.

"Come on, you can never be too old for a magic trick." The man said, digging around his pockets and pulling out a pair of handcuffs. "Why don't I show you an escape trick?"

"Fuck off old man." Steve's new voice told the man, trying the van door but found it locked. "Let me out asshole. I'm not interested." The fear and anxiety grew as the older man leaned over and grabbed his now skinnier wrists.

"I promise I'll take you home but first you have to pay for being such a naughty boy." The man put the cuff on one of his wrists when Steve punched out, catching the guy right in the nose.

"Don't touch me!" He yelled and scrambled for the door, frantically pulling on it but it refused to budge. Looking around for another exit when the man growled.

"You broke my nose you little shit." The man leaned over to try and grab Steve's other arm. Steve grappled with the man, going down and biting the guy's arm hard enough to draw blood. The creep yowled in pain and backed off. The younger man's eyes darting to the keys in ignition. Trying to rip them out as the man recoiled and grabbed something out of the glove box. Steve just had just got the keys out when all of a sudden the man was spraying something in his face. Steve winced, his head and vision clouding as he slumped over.

"Whugh...what the fuck was...?" He barely managed to slur out. Only semi aware of this man beside him loudly cursing as he snatched the keys from Steve's hands. Suddenly, he found himself falling back into darkness for the second time that night.

[monsoonblooms12]

The Butterfly Effect (Ethan Ramsey x f!MC)

Summary: The Journey from where it all began to where they are now. From a 2-minute power nap to a Miami kiss, Pooja and Ethan have come a long way. From Pooja's POV (Set in OH Bk 1 Ch 10 and contains flashbacks from OH Bk 1 Ch 1, Ch 4 and Ch 5)❤

The Butterfly Effect: Discovered by Edward Lorenz, this theory suggests that something small and insignificant, can alter situations in such a way that leads to utterly drastic changes. For example, a butterfly flaps its wings at an Amazonian Jungle and subsequently a storm ravages half of Europe. (This has to be one of my favorite theories ever🦋)

A/N: I got inspired from a dark Academia quote and here we are with 2.4K of mess. But I enjoyed providing all the fbs from Poo's POV and filling in the gaps of the unknown. And all the DbC peeps, I am trying to finish ch 8 believe me😭

Thank you so much to @jamespotterthefirst for Pre-reading! Love you🧡

If you enjoyed the story, please like it, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going🦋

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey X f!MC (Pooja Sharma)

Word Count: around 2.4K

Rating: General

Category: A messy mix of Fluff and Angst

Warnings: None that I found

A grain of sand, almost imperceptible to the human eye, 2 millimetres in diameter. Just a tiny little grain of sand, a single one. One would wonder how great of an effect that could produce?

A single grain of sand, eliminated from the base of a sand sculpture, can set on fire a cascade of events that result in something as drastic as the demolition of the entire sculpture. Just a trifling 2 mm sized grain of sand.

Tufts of hair gently swayed with the swooshing ocean breeze, the very grains of sand of which her mind was thinking about slip through gaps of her toes. It's a calming atmosphere, having a Zen-like effect on her racing heart and confused reasoning.

The echoing crash of ocean tides, the hushed ruffle of her shimmering purple dress, and the pattern of her footsteps of the white sand, now silver under the enchanting moonbeams.

She could not think about bad ideas and good ideas anymore. Nor could she obliterate the delicate touch of peach lips ingrained in her mind. Everything was a lock of tangled hair, a chaotic mess in her mind.

And when you can't disentangle a mess, you just tear it off.

That was what she was doing, tearing herself away before her mind got engulfed by a cocoon of ambiguity and concealed probabilities, restricting her to get out without getting transformed into someone else.

Legs exhausted after strolling for who knows how long, Pooja sits down, not bothering about the sheet of sand fragments that adhered begrudgingly to the purple satin.

A simple motion ensues, the florid hair tie holding her brown hair strands in a ponytail, now lay in her hand, giving them the liberty to enjoy the tranquillity of the idyllic scene they found themselves in.

Relaxation. That was what she anticipated. The soothing of her racing heart, the clearing of her muddled head, the easing of her bothering thoughts.

But it never came, the relaxation she desired.

Instead, her fingers, for a reason mysterious even to her, fidgeted the diamond imitation bracelet that embellished her left wrist. A twitch unveiled a vague scar, a remembrance of an old episode entirely cleared off from her mind.

Flashback

Pooja was a Potterhead. An extreme one indeed. Sometimes the thought made her chuckle. How she despised the books once, presuming they were overrated. And then, as if a magic trick had been performed on her, she became the Maven of the Harry Potter club.

But being a Potterhead and having to live in a niche under the stairs did not go hand in hand. The room under a staircase was still a room under a staircase. And every day, her mind replayed the poem of curses to her, as if to warn her to never search for an apartment on a Facebook Group ever again.

And now she stood, waiting for the century-old toaster's ping, as sleep struck like pin-pricks on her eyelids, threatening to close them off. It was a bad day today, the phone battery drained, and she, coffee drained. And the cherry on the top? Today was the first day of her residence at the most prestigious hospital in the entire States.

Uff!

She yawned the hundredth time, sleep playing a tiring game of chess with her mind, and giving it a Check! every now and then.

I don't even know a goddamn coffee shop around in here!

Displeased grunts accompanied the thought as she took the knife and began slicing the apple she had been floundering around for quite some time.

One Slice, and Another, and Ano-

Snorr!

What an ability it was to fall asleep anywhere, in any position! What harm would a "Power Nap" of a minute or two do? Right?

AAHHH!

The scream came out in bits, first when her eyes fluttered open with the sudden pain. A pause followed when she actually looked at the source of it and after her eyes and mind registered what was happening, came the second scream.

She was getting the taste of just how profitable the power nap was.

Hurrying away, she rummaged around for a first aid box, failed to find it, trotted to her Harry Potter adobe and took out the medical goodies she had brought with her. After ransacking through it, she found the antiseptic and the swabs she was looking for. Then a faint sound came from the blinking cellular and she picked it up, not waiting for breakfast. Just as she clicked the unlock button...

HOLY SHIT!

What? How? Her mind could not register. The only thing she understood was that she was notoriously late for her first day, and now she would have to do all the running that she had avoided for all the preceding years.

Letting out another pained groan, she kicked two flowerpots on her way to the kitchen, took the toasted slices of bread, switched off the stupid piece of machinery and ran.

She was sure she would have come first in any marathon if she had run in them with the speed she was racing right now.————————————————————————

Did she know about Dolores Hudson? No, she didn't. Had she planned on telling about her to Dr Ramsey? No, she hadn't.

The two words had inadvertently slipped off her tongue, not envisioning it as an indication. But as soon as they reached his ears, it felt as if a domino had been pushed. One pushed on to the other, leading to a chain of events that had given no hints, no warnings at all.

And now she was in the NICU, chatting with the man whom she considered an idol, a role model as if they were old companions. It was an enchanting experience to see the intern-terrorizing gentleman, so ... normal.

She questioned her mind's choice of word, but she did not completely disagree. To see Dr Ramsey, sitting here with an intern, talking with her, for no particular purpose other than the fact that she decided to stay back here in contrast to any other person, who would have valued their sleep than watching over a premature baby with whom she had no connection.

When sleep muddled her thoughts, she didn't realize what she was doing. Head lowered into his shoulder in a motion that felt like a reflex embedded in the nerve cords of her spine. She missed the gentle smile, decorating the handsome face of his, as he watched her from the corner of his eye, his eyes holding an emotion unrecognizable.

Was it affection? Pride? Adoration? Or something completely different? Who knew.

But if there was something she did know after that day, it was that she felt lucky, damn lucky, for that slip of the tongue.————————————————————————

How idiotic of her the decision was, she didn't want to talk about it.

Pooja had only found herself running the way she was running now on the first day of her residence, and she had only herself, and no one else to blame.

Why did she think that giving up on the most wanted position for every medicine intern in Edenbrook for friends when every one of them participated in it was a good idea?

If only her brain comprehended her priorities appropriately, she wouldn't have to rush through roads like a person who was missing their train.

Panting, grunting, and completely tensed, she arrives at Edenbrook. Steps don't slow down until she arrives before the light beige door, huffs and puffs, not pausing for a split second. She doubted if her legs still had the power to walk or if she would have to crawl into the office.

Nah, no more embarrassment, she would not be able to bear it. With the power that remained in overworked limbs, she knocked, entered and gave her reasons for the delay. And then, by a margin of a minute, she signed the sheet, absolutely normal but still holding the power to twist her entire life in an unforeseen way.

But did she regret it? She couldn't, and she wouldn't.————————————————————————

Miami. The city of gorgeous beaches, giving the aesthetic of peach and teal life. The expensive marble-floored hotel rooms in which she found herself was unreal. Definitely not made for some random intern.

Gorgeous decorated interior, delicately manicured lawns, elegantly made fountains, all standing majestically, giving a fight to each other. She glided through the vast space, joy overcoming job as she breathed the calming salty air coming from the oceanfront, which appeared like a picture frame in front of her. She had never seen anything so perfect in her life.

It was like Ataraxia.

She preferred Mountains over Beaches. She always had, and without a doubt, she always will. But when something looks so heavenly, it would be absolute stupidity to forego the chance of visiting it, even if it contrasted her preferences.

Forgetting the not-so-pleasant interaction with Declan Nash, which appeared like a stone in her perfect day, she let her sensations delve into the delicious culinary masterpieces that melted in her mouth like wax.

All the merrymaking and socializing drained her. But the gentle talks, soft giggles that she shared with him, an extraordinary, priceless moment, seemed to charge her, rejuvenate her. A corner of her heart did hope for something to happen. But she hushed it, not wanting to spoil the casualness, the beauty of the simplicity that blew in the air between them.

It felt like existing in the setting of one of those Michael Faudet quotes, one of them particularly being emphasized by her mind.

"As our eyes meet, all-time seizes to exist. The dying second frozen like petals of red roses kissed by autumn frost."

Pooja's mind still reeled, falling freely into the void as passion and some unnamed emotion overtook them. His heart steady under the touch of her palm and hers racing under the touch of his. She would not be able to remove the unreal image from her idiot of a heart, even if she wanted to.

Sleep refused to come to her, even after calling it repeatedly. She sat up, relieving the memory, playing in front of her like a sepia movie on the silver screen. Eyes travelling around, only to fall on a bouquet kept neatly at one of the antique corner tables.

It was white lilies and purple orchids.

Pooja Sharma didn't know the language of flowers when she received them, with a tag casually signed as E. A vague tag like that did not help to know the actual sender. The man whom she kissed had a name beginning with E, the hotel she was staying in had a name beginning with E.

Hell, even the hospital she worked in had a name with the letter E.

But if she had known the language of flowers, she would have pinpointed the symbolism hidden in it.

The White Lily carrying the meaning of Purity, Sweetness while Purple Orchids a clear cut indicator of admiration and elegance.

She would have been able to tell which E had sent the delicately wrapped piece that now lay uncared for in the corner of her room.

Feelings overcrowded reason, and she found herself suffocated in the very room that seemed heavenly to her in the morning.

Slowly and silently, she walked away to find the solace which he or she could not give her, in nature.

Flashback ends

As the amaranthine ocean glistens, waves crash and the foamy water rushes to engulf her feet as she stood, hands wrapped around herself, she felt she had truly found solace. There was a spiral, an unending coil of memories, a string which, when pulled, tugged in emotions hidden in darkest corners, forgotten but related, all tied together.

It was surprising, enigmatic, how much the little brain of hers, the soft heart of hers, holds in them. A constant battle of reason and emotions ravage the tired battlefields of her body. How casually, reminiscences of a bygone day appears, flicker like the reflection in the mirror of the calm pond water, but remain clear through the ripples that spread on the surface from time to time. That's how memories work, still clear, still dear, even after passing through chaotic ripples of time.

As she reaches the end of the spiral, the helix of her thoughts, she finds herself even more astonished than she was when she reverted to the first pages of the memoirs of her stay in Boston.

It was just a minute, or a word or two. Always so insignificant.

Every ignored act added one upon another and resulted in the catastrophic mess of heartbreak and affection she found herself today.

The 2-minute Power Nap of her first day? It led to the 2-degree shift of the knife and the scar that her finger was tracing now.

That 2-degree shift led to the delay in her reaching the hospital?

It resulted in her meeting her mentor, which gave her the chance to do the thoracotomy with him, to experience how it felt when his hand enveloped hers.

Those two words that slipped as a nonchalant thought off her tongue? It was why she could know how Ethan Ramsey was, behind the tough exteriors, the short-tempered demeanour, how it felt to place her head gently on his shoulder, to wake up to his glowing face.

And that one minute past midnight, when she signed up for the challenge that would change her life? That is why she is here, hair ruffling and eyes glistening, the Leucos Moon reflecting on the glistening water, the crepuscule spread mystically around her. That is why she knew how it felt to be touched by him, kissed by him, to get lost in him.

When Edward Lorenz discovered the butterfly event, he had correlated mathematics and meteorology. Had he thought that the same butterfly effect had turned an unassuming intern's life upside down, pushed her so back in the void of circumstances that it was impossible to come back?

Just a 2-degree shift of a knife, and now she was here in Miami. Just like the unassuming butterfly's flap of wing, which now ravaged a storm through her life.

Glassy droplets make a slow trail down the curve of her cheeks and drop on the scar as if trying to meet the origin which has brought her to the coordinates of the present.

And even though she did not know what would happen in the days to come, she was happy, truly happy, for that shift of her knife and for the 2 minutes of the power nap.

For the butterfly effect of love.

PS: Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a great day ahead! Love, Manamee🧡.

Tags (Please let me know if you want to be added or removed or if I forgot you):

Perma: @gkittylove99 @neotericthemis @udishaman @aestheticartsx @twinkleallnight @schnitzelbutterfingers @sophxwithers @sweatyrysconnoisseur @nikki-2406 @choicesfanaf @trrfanaddict @starrystarrytrouble @gardeningourmet @parkbarks @mvalentine @lovablegranny @mercury84choices @helloayz

Open Heart (All fics and edit): @lucy-268 @maurine07 @bellcat2010

Ethan x Pooja (fics): @aleynareads @stygianflood @choicesaddict5 @mysticaurathings @jamespotterthefirst @ilikemenbutonlyethanramsey

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics @choicesbookclub

[greenygreenland]

Rain and Fog: (platonic) Levi Ackerman x Reader

-i know i only ever post star wars, but now I'm expanding my horizon

-platonic platonic platonic

-if you haven't watched that set of episodes with isabel and farlan (or read the manga) this one-shot won't make sense

-you're his baby sister♡

-imagine being best friends with Levi though (he'd be a total butt)

-i myself don't swear, but Levi obviously will

Summary:

It's rainy, foggy and cold, just like the day you lost Farlan and Isabel. You can't help be reminisce about their deaths.

The rain poured from the heavens in heavy, cold droplets. It pounded and forced the ground to absorb the liquid until puddles ripped through the ground. To (Y/n), a petite, young girl, the puddles could have been mini lakes. Fog had settled itself at the edge of the forest, and if (Y/n) didn't know that HQ was only a mere fifteen minute walk away, she would have thought herself to be lost. Sheathing her blades, she began her trek back. The downpour had soaked through her clothes, leaving them squishy and ice cold. Of all the days to rain, she thought, it had to be today.

"(Y/n)!"

She paused in her step and squinted through the fog. That voice was something (Y/n) knew by heart. It was smooth, yet slightly grumbly and coarse. There was a clear tone of anger as the voice called out again. It was the voice of Levi Ackerman, (Y/n)'s elder brother. He waltzed through the brush and emerged through the milky fog, his hands clenched into fists and a waterproof coat over his head. When his steely gray hues landed on (Y/n), he faltered. Beside her, he saw his late friends Farlan and Isabel. They were smiling at him and talking as if they weren't dead and as if that night in the foggy rain never happened. Levi rubbed the rain from his eyes with a frown.

They were gone.

With a loud sigh, he seizeed (Y/n) by the hand and dragged her through the foggy forest. It was eerie because it reminded him so much of that day. He lost Isabel and Farlarn; it was pure luck (Y/n) somehow survived. A deep scowl plastered itself on Levi's lips. "Do you know how fucking long I've been looking for you?" he demanded.

(Y/n) gently wrapped her numb fingers with his. "I was just about to head back." she replied. Levi didn't doubt her words, but that wasn't the problem. He was irritated that she a, did not tell him she would be out here, and b, would likely catch a cold from hanging out in this weather. Levi pulled (Y/n)'s hand up to eye level. With calculating eyes, he scanned over her nails and fingertips. Little cuts and scraps littered her hand. She didn't seem to mind though, because she didn't flinch when Levi gave her hand a good squeeze.

Maybe that was just because she was too cold.

"Look at your fucking hands, they're blue. Do you know what that means?" He didn't give (Y/n) a chance to reply. "It means you're cold and that you'll probably get sick." The duo reached the edge of the woods. Without the forest's cover, there was nothing to stop the heavy downpour. Levi released (Y/n)'s hand from his and resorted to giving her a harsh shove on the back. "You're already soaked as it is. Get moving before it gets worse."

And so the two sprinted back to HQ in the rain. Despite the waterproof coat on Levi's shoulders, he was not spared. By the time they arrived at HQ, you would have assumed they'd taken a shower.

Levi ripped the doors open and yanked (Y/n) inside. He was angry -- no -- livid that she even thought of training when he could barely make out his boots through the fog. "You're fucking stupid, you know." Levi grumbled. "What kind of idiot trains in the rain?" (Y/n) wrung out her shirt through the open door. She didn't meet Levi's steely gaze as he examined her shaking form. "Hey." Levi barked. "Look at me when I talk to you." (Y/n) continued wringing out her shirt before moving on to her Survey Corps jacket. Levi raised a brow as if to ask himself, 'is she being serious'?

After a painful moment of silence, Levi concluded that (Y/n) indeed was being serious and that there actually was something wrong with her. Levi gently placed a hand on (Y/n)'s shoulder. "What's--" He cut himself short. (Y/n)'s gray eyes were filled with unshed tears as she sniffled. They pooled in the corners of her eyes, glistening in the candlelight. Ever inch of her trembled, but clearly not from the cold. Levi knitted his brows together. He wondered if he had said something to offend bis sister, but that couldn't be it. She was a tough one, and even if he did say something mean, it wouldn't have gotten to her like this.

If Levi were still that little brat from the Underground fighting his way to the top alongside his sister, he would have scolded her for crying. As he stared her down, he wasn't so sure if that were the right thing to do. Levi slowly turned (Y/n) around so they faced each other and searched her face for answers he knew he wouldn't find. Maybe something happened today, he thought.

Pursing his lips, he thought back to what he'd seen (Y/n) do and who she talked with. He didn't get far when a sudden thought struck him like a bolt of lightning. It wasn't something he said or an event from today. No, it was much deeper.

The rain. The fog. Isabel. Farlan.

"Ah." Levi muttered. "I get it." (Y/n) sniffled in response, her gaze anywhere but on Levi's. It was clear she didn't want to talk about anything, but Levi had other plans. He wrung out a pint or two of water from his clothes before starting down the halls of HQ. "Come on." Levi called. (Y/n) silently followed, avoiding any following eyes of her comrades in arms. After a few turns, the duo arrived in front of Levi's office. He wrapped his fingers around the doorknob and gave it a good twist. The scent of fresh lemon and black tea hit (Y/n)'s nose. She couldn't help but bask in the pleasant scents as they entered the dark room. Levi closed his door and lit a few candles. Light flooded the spotless room and cast long shadows against the walls. Although they were inside, the loud patters of rain echoed through an open window.

"Here." Levi threw a towel over (Y/n)'s head. He walked over to his closest and pulled out another to wrap around his shoulders. There was a heavy yet comfortable silence as the two dried off their clothes.

"I'm sorry." (Y/n) suddenly announced. Levi raised a brow and leaned against the wall opposite from (Y/n). "What are you apologizing for?"

"I...shouldn't have cried."

There was another silence before Levi figured out what he wanted to say. "It's natural I guess." he replied. (Y/n) frowned. That wasn't something she expected to hear, especially from the mouth of her brother. Levi huffed. "You never answered my question. Why the fuck were you training out in the rain for?" (Y/n) folded her hands together. She ran her cold fingertips over each scrape and cut on her palms. "The weather just had me thinking about...that day." She heaved in a shaky breath that worried Levi. "If I had been more prepared, then they wouldn't have died."

Levi loftily crossed his arms. In a way, she was right. If they had been more prepared for all the rain and fog, then the formation wouldn't have broken. But on the flip side, no one had control over the situation, not even Levi. He himself ran off when he knew to stay together. Because he thought he could swiftly get the job done, he ran off all alone, leaving them with (Y/n), who was only about thirteen or fourteen at the time.

"There was nothing any of us could do." he firmly said. "You were young at the time--hell, you still are. As soon as we started the expedition, we lost control. None of us knew it would be foggy that day. None of us knew there would be so many damn titans." Levi's shoulders tensed and he clenched a fist. All the anguish he stored so deeply in his heart began resurfacing like wood in a lake. A bout of anger followed after so fast that he couldn't remind himself to forget about it like he always did.

"There was nothing we could fucking do!" he exclaimed. "None of us!" He threw his hands in the air. "Do I cry about it? No! Do I wish that I could have done something? Yes." Levi shook his head with a shaky breath. "Every fucking time-- ugh, fuck!" Levi walked over to (Y/n), an ocean of emotion in his steely eyes. After surpressing his emotions for so long, he couldn't find it in him to hide them anymore. Levi found it so difficult because (Y/n) was crying, and she knew exactly how he felt. She was there. She saw everything with her own two eyes. Only by pure luck had she escaped the jaws of a titan and found a nearby squad.

Wordlessly, (Y/n) wrapped her arms around Levi's shoulders. It was quiet, save for the patter of rain outside and the occasional breeze that entered through the open window. The two basked in each other's arms, thankful for the other's presence. Because they had each other, they knew they'd be alright.

[a-knightinsourarmor]

Small Trouble | SPN Fanfic

This is old @castiellover20. It's been long since I wrote a fic. I hope I am back.

| Archive On Our Own Link | Wattpad Link |

Words: 4,257

Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Supernatural

Characters: Deaged!Castiel, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Summary: Castiel got cursed and he turned into a child. Things were supposed to be easy for him, but he is the one to suffer the most.

Notes: I wanna thank @experimentzero for editing this fic. Thanks a lot!

Castiel was a really serious child. A damn serious child. When the angel turned to this small five-year old kid, Dean thought, or hoped, that Cas would be a cheerful, excited, energetic child that would make their lives difficult. But that just wasn't the case. Cas was the most serious, quiet, and calm child that Dean had ever seen. Yes, the hunter knew that Cas remembered everything about his past, which was quite unpleasant, but a kid should have no worries right? Enjoy the present. Jump around, yell and scream, play games. Cas wasn't like that. Cas was ever normal.

It was a witch hunt that Dean and Sam had planned, and Castiel decided to join them. The witch was too damn powerful. Some would say almost as powerful as Rowena was, not that he wanted to find out for sure. The witch had them coughing blood on the ground in seconds, with only Cas being able to escape from her spell and run after her. All Dean knew was that, according to Cas, he managed to cut her deeply-that was also why he and Sam weren't under her spell anymore- and then she said something in Latin, a spell of some kind that seemingly removed his grace. A spell to make him a small kid, a human kid.

Dean had found Cas, almost an hour later, curled up into a ball, into his now large shirt, crying, scared. If Dean hadn't seen the trench coat thrown close to Cas and the blue tie loose around him, he would think he was a random lost child. Cas was crying so hard that he couldn't even talk to him. “Cas?” Dean had asked, only to get a loud whimper and the kid to look into Dean's eyes.Yup, it was him. He recognized those bright, blue eyes anywhere. Dean picked him up carefully, only to notice that Cas' shirt was wet, and not only by his tears. The embarrassment in his eyes said it all. The hunter just kissed his forehead and reassured him everything would be fine as they returned to the car to make their way to the bunker. Sam was driving this time.

Cas later told them everything and how scared he was they wouldn't ever find him. How he didn't remember their phone numbers and how he wouldn't find them with their fake names even if he managed to find a grown up. He told them how he felt scared for the first time. How dark the night was, how big the bugs suddenly seemed, and how cold he felt.

Dean could understand the small angel's feelings. After all, he was a kid once. However, Cas hadn't. According to him, Castiel was a grown up angel in less than three days. He had told him that before the world was corrupted, the angels had some kind of physical form and that he was a kid for three days. Not that it mattered. Cas wasn't an angel kid, he was human now. And no matter how hard he and Sam would try and find the witch, she had gotten away. There was no way to reverse the spell. Not even Rowena knew how to reverse it. The deaging spell was older than she could remember.

And here they were, stuck with the most serious kid in creation. Dean felt like he was going to lose it. He knew that kids like Cas existed. Kids that seemed all thoughtful and worried. But these kids were mostly coming from a family with strict parents. Parents that didn't seem to even want to have kids. Parents that yelled and screamed. Sam could have been that kid if he hadn't Dean. But Dean was a GREAT parent. He was always good with kids. Always up to make them laugh, always up to make up games and fairytales. Always up to make everyone have the time of their lives. But nothing worked with Cas.

“What is he? Depressed? He can't be. He is a kid, he shouldn't feel any worry. It's not natural. I tell him to play, to buy some ice cream, and he tells me he wants to sleep! Freaking sleep!” Dean said, frustrated, one day. He couldn't take it anymore. “I know he's still Cas, but I can't make him happy even in that form?” Dean said obviously hurt.

“You need to calm down, Dean. I know it's hard but you have to accept that he is who he is. Be thankful he has a toy that he's attached to,” Sam said staring at his laptop.

“Yeah, thank God. I took him to the damn store and he didn't want any toy. Not anyone at all, until we found this bee plushie. At least we know he likes something. Bees”

“Yeah, and you bought him all the stupid stuff you found that had bees on it. Clothes, sheets, even pens that had bees. Suddenly the bunker has turned to black and yellow," Sam chuckled.

Dean couldn't help but laugh. “Well yeah, I am worried for the guy. He has been through a lot lately and now this?” he shrugged.

“Dean, you stuck bee stickers all over the place! That's too much, even for him!” Sam laughed and Dean rolled his eyes.

After some time being quiet, Dean sighed. “At least, he follows rules and we won't have to worry for his safety. But dude... I gotta tell you something. Promise not to laugh, and don't tell him I told you”. Sam nodded and Dean just took a deep breath, thinking about how to say it. “I want you to look on the internet about why he may be wetting his bed. He does it every night.” Dean said with a sad sigh.

Sam seemed confused. “Isn't that normal?” he asked.

“No dude! He's not three, he's five. And surely every night is not a good sign,” Dean mumbled as he stretched his hands. “Look for it and tell me later. I am taking him for a walk” he said as he stood up. “I don't think his mood is that bad. He doesn't seem to enjoy things that much, but he doesn't cry either. He hasn't cried since we found him, even when he fell off the furniture," he said worriedly as he left the room.

Dean knocked on Cas' door as he walked in, only to see the tiny angel rushing back to his bed, as if he was hiding something. Castiel held his bee tight and returned his attention back on the TV, acting like he hasn't seen Dean. “What are you planning to do, little guy?” Dean smirked.

Castiel blushed darkly and bowed his head, moving his small legs anxiously. “I wanted t-to take the chocolate from the fridge” he lied as he gave the hunter a small, innocent smile.

Dean seemed confused. Castiel never tried to sneak out to get some chocolate when he was told not to. The fact he wanted to do something... So normal for a kid, made him feel a little relieved. “Since when you do things behind my back, little guy?” Dean said with a giggle as he sat next to him. Cas was watching Scooby Doo again. “How many times will you watch all the episodes all over?” he teased.

Castiel smiled and made space for Dean. Castiel smiled. That was... Impressive. “I am sorry, I just really wanted to eat some chocolate, after this ep-pisode that Scooby Doo eat-ed the many many chocolates,” Castiel said with a big giggle. “I like these,” he mumbled, holding his bee plushie more tight.

Castiel giggled. Another surprise. Except the fact he wanted to steal some candy from the kitchen. “Next time, just ask me.” he said petting his head and the small kid just nodded. “Wanna go for a walk?” he softly asked.

“Yes,” replied Cas. He sighed and forced his biggest smile.

Cas had said "yes," just like that. Without complaining. Another shocking thing. “Alright, let's take your bee and go? Wanna go get some burgers and ice cream?" Dean asked. "Damn Cas, I am too good with you, but it's good you like something healthy at least, like honey.” he teased.

“Ice cream is healthy too. It's milk...” he whispered as he held his bee. “Bzz likes the idea. And he wants e-tra honey in his ice cream, please,” he said with a begging look.

Okay. Something was wrong. The little angel had named the bee? And with such a stupid name? ‘Bzz’? Until now, he was calling it just bee? And he was asking freely about extra ice cream without questioning if he was too demanding? Dean was worried, yet happy to think that Cas might have started getting used to be a kid and let himself enjoy it for as long as it lasted. “Extra honey for Bzz,” said dean, laughing, as he carried Cas with a big spin to the car. “My little super-angel, going to get some honey,” he said softly, only to get more laughs from Cas.

The drive was also weird. Cas was mumbling a stupid kid's song Dean had on the radio for him to listen. He smiled to himself as he relaxed. Maybe the wet nights meant nothing. Maybe Cas was starting to accept the situation.

As he got with the angel to the restaurant, he helped him sit on his lap. He always loved to sit on his lap, no matter how ashamed he felt about it. He ordered for them two burgers with potatoes at first as he played with Castiel's small fingers, just to get another laugh. That was when Castiel looked up at him with these big, blue eyes. “Can I go play?” he asked as he stared at the very few kids playing to a corner of the store, probably hide and seek. Dean opened his eyes widely and nodded. He set him on the ground and watched him rush to the place the kids were. He swallowed anxiously. This was starting to get too much, and honestly too fast. Could Cas... Lose his identity to the spell? Turn to a normal five year old kid and forget what it was like to be the dorky, serious angel he was? He sighed as he texted Sam to keep searching for the cure, because something was starting to feel wrong.

He watched Cas carefully as he stood between those kids. The food arrived but he kept standing there, trying to figure out what was happening. Cas wasn't playing obviously. He was standing there, keeping some distance from the kids as the kids seemed to talk to him. Then one of them, the bigger one, walked closer to Cas and grabbed Castiel's bee, dragging it away from him. Dean knew this wasn't good. Instinctively he jumped from his seat, wanting to get it back for him. But it wasn't right. Not now. The angel should have the right to have some independence.

He knew Castiel wouldn't give it to him, no matter what. Cas wasn't letting that bee free from his hands. Dean had really struggled to convince him to let it go even when he was taking a bath, because ‘the bee didn't know how to hold its breath underwater’. So it was a big deal someone took it from him.

Cas said something that Dean couldn't hear, and then the kids started laughing. He kept talking, and suddenly, all of them stopped. Then he moved to take back his bee from the boy's hands, but the other pushed him and Cas fell. Castiel groaned in pain, since he had recently hit his knee. He just stood up, and he returned to Dean's lap. Without his bee. Having the most sad look on his face.

“What happened?” Dean said, trying to hide his anger.

“They said I am too big to have a bee, and laughed... Called me a baby.” Castiel said with a sad tone.

“And why didn't you take it back?” Dean asked.

“I don't hit humans. Not small kids, at least.” Castiel simply said. Well, that was his Cas. That was his angel. “Dean, is my name stupid?” Castiel asked with the same sad look as he looked into Dean's eyes.

“No, Cas, you have a beautiful name. Why?”

“They said it's weird like me.”

“And what did you say?”

“That I like it. And they said my p-parents must be stupid to name me that.”

“And what did you say?”

“That I don't have parents. I tried to take it back, but no violence” he sighed, bowing his head. Feeling humiliated. "Then the mean one pushed me," he continued.

Dean stared at the kids, as they used Castiel's adorable bee as a ball, kicking it around. Dean felt anger boiling inside him. Now he understood all the mothers that were screaming to protect their kids. He placed Cas on the seat, as he went where the boys were and he grabbed the bee immediately. The poor thing had gotten dirty. “If you dare bother him again, I will have a talk with your parents.” he only said as he returned to Castiel with the bee. He held it out for Cas to grab, and Cas took it quickly. Castiel hugged it tightly, and even if Dean was slightly disgusted, he smiled that the angel seemed to be happy again.

“Thank you, Dean” Castiel whispered.

Then, Dean cut the burger in small pieces for him, and fed it to him, knowing that Cas enjoyed it more than he would admit. He still was worried for Castiel's mood before. This childish mood the angel didn't normally have. “Cas, why did you want to go play?” Dean asked, only to get the boy to shrug and stare away. He should probably ask later. And that's what he did. He bought him some ice cream, he carried him to the car and drove home. Cas had returned to his normal mood. Not talking much. Seem to be thinking most of the time, and not showing much emotion. Dean was relieved.

Dean walked into the bunker, carrying the small angel in his hands. He loved to hear Cas giggle. He laid to the bed with him on his arms, laughing. “You liked the walk we had?” he asked, Castiel nodding with a big smile on his face. Now was the time to ask.

“Cas... What happened today? I know you. I know that something was weird today...” he said. He didn't have the time to finish his sentence and he saw the angel cry. He didn't know what was wrong. “Cas? Cas? Hey, buddy, please, what's wrong?” he worriedly said.

Castiel buried his face in his hands as he kept crying. “You ssssaid I am not n-nowmaw” Castiel stuttered and Dean just held him close, not understanding.

“Normal? When?”

“I heawd you! You talked to Sam! You said I am weiwd” Castiel mumbled as he kept crying. Dean started to understand. Was it when he talked to Sam? Did he listen to them? That was why he rushed back to his bed when Dean walked into his room?

“Were you eavesdropping?”

Castiel just nodded. He felt ashamed but he had heard everything. “I make you sad”

“You don't Cas. I was just worried... Because even as a kid, you were too much like... You... That's all... I prefer you as you are Cas. I love you the way you are... You scared the hell out of me... Was this all an act? Because I started getting worried you were becoming... Too much of a kid” he said, rubbing Castiel's back.

Castiel looked up, with his red eyes from crying. “I... wanted you not to worry... Be a kid...” he sniffed.

Dean sighed relieved and kept holding him close. “Cas, I didn't want that. I was just worried... But it's you, and I love you as who you are... You don't have to act like a kid... You don't have to steal candy, or give stupid names to your bee, or play with kids... My serious baby angel is already perfect” Dean chuckled only to get another whimper from the boy. “What's wrong?”

“I liked the name Bzz... This was not an act...” Castiel whimpered and Dean couldn't help but laugh. That was a big mistake. Castiel looked up confused and offended, he gave a small push at Dean's shoulder and then smiled softly, feeling much better. “Bzz is a cute name”

“Yeah, Cas,” Dean softly said as he kissed the top of his head.

“And for telling Sam for my bed a-accidents, you owe me a big, big ice cream”

“I sure do. Now brush your teeth and tell me when you go to bed,” Dean sighed as he left the room, with a small smile on his face.

Dean walked into the library, looking to find Sam. “Have you slept at all?” Dean said,raising an eyebrow. Sam was in the same position he had left him. Sam just rolled his eyes and looked at his brother.

“I searched what you told me... I didn't find anything interesting” he admitted. “Kids usually wet their beds when they move to a new place, or they are in a stressful situation...”

“So its psychological?” Dean asked and Sam nodded. “Or he is drinking too much water before going to sleep,” Sam said as he shrugged.

“Don't be stupid!” Dean groaned as he gave a pat at the others shoulder. He wasn't pleased with the answer. He just returned to the little angel's room, to find Cas laying and waiting for him. “Did you brush your teeth?” he asked.

The angel gave a nod. Dean would never doubt Cas' words. Even as a kid. He sat at the edge of the bed giving a kiss at the kid's forehead. “Goodnight,” Castiel whispered. Dean nodded and walked out, leaving the door cracked open. He usually closed it, but since Castiel's lamp had broken, he thought Cas would want some light getting into his room.

A few hours had past, Dean had a few beers in the kitchen, while searching to a book of spells for any reaging spell. There was nothing. And that was it. He went to return to his room, but on his way past Castiel's room, he heard him crying.

He didn't enter. Not to grab the angel and tell him everything was alright or ask if he had a nightmare. He just stayed at the door, peeking inside at the angel, curled into a ball, crying with his eyes closed. A few minutes later the crying stopped. That was when Dean entered and checked Castiel's bed. It was wet. So that was it? Was Castiel having nightmares? How didn't he know that? Was it because he always had the door closed, and couldn't hear him? He sighed softly, as he kissed the small angel's head and carefully placed him to his bed, while he changed the sheets. Next time he would leave the door open, or sleep in the room with him. Try to see what was wrong and why he had never asked for help in the middle of the night.

Castiel woke up the next morning, staring at his bed. He was sure he had wet his bed again. He thought he must have been dreaming and let it go. He joined Dean in the kitchen, giving him a small forced smile as Dean made him breakfast. “Hey,” he whispered. Dean placed a plate full of eggs and bacon in front of him. Sam walked in too with a sleepy face.

“You are going to kill him, with all this fat,” Sam sighed.

“Said the most responsible parent in the world,” Dean grumbled as he served Sam and himself the same. “I had a strange dream last night,” Dean said. “It was a horrible one... It seemed too real... It was like I was in hell again” Dean said, giving Castiel a weird look.

Sam seemed confused. “Since when do you talk about things like this?” he asked.

“I am just saying. It has been a long time since I had this nightmare," Dean said. Castiel didn't react at all. He just heard them, and he kept eating. “Do you have any weird dreams Cas? Since you are human now?” the hunter asked.

Castiel had his mouth full and just shook his head. “No” he said after he swallowed. “I don't dream at all”

“That's weird. Don't you dream about unicorns and stuff?” Dean chuckled, while Sam looks confused.

“No, I don't. And unicorns don't exist anymore,” Castiel said, still focused on his food. Dean and Sam stared at each other after hearing the word ‘anymore’, not knowing how to respond.

“So, do you see like... Happy stuff? About us, or villages made of chocolate or whatever? You are a human kid, Cas, you should be having dreams,” Dean said.

“I don't!” Castiel said with a loud voice, his eyes getting wet suddenly. He dropped the spoon, held his bee tight and left the kitchen, heading back to his bedroom.

“That was weird,” Sam sighed.

“You're telling me,” Dean said. He decided to leave the angel alone for now.

A few hours later, after both of the brothers finished their food and Dean washed the dishes, the older brother knocked on Castiel's door. The small angel was watching TV. “This is going to rot your brain,” Dean chuckled.

“You watched a lot too when you were small�� Castiel said with a shrug, as he kept his eyes on tv.

Dean jumped to Cas' bed, and held him close, making Cas sit on his lap. “Wanna watch Frozen? You'll loooove Olaf!” Dean smiled. “I am into Elsa, so you know,” he smirked and Castiel nodded.

“I want popcorn too” the angel said shyly.

“It's a deal!” Dean laughed as he grabbed the boy in his arms and carried him to the kitchen to make lots of popcorn with him.

After the movie was over, Castiel was peacefully sleeping on Dean's arms. Dean couldn't help but smile. They had already watched 'Frozen', and all of the 'Toy Story' movies. So he was happy to see Cas that relaxed again. He laid him in his bed and for the first time, he decided to sleep with him, and try to see what's wrong.

He closed his eyes too, and after a few minutes, he was fast asleep. They were both tired and it was really late. But Dean suddenly felt a small hand holding him tight and that was when he opened his eyes. Castiel was crying again. He was crying hard. He had his eyes closed and he was clinging to him, wanting to be held. Dean hugged his small body, immediately, not understanding what was actually wrong. “Cas, hey, what you saw, it wasn't real. I am here. You had a nightmare buddy” Dean said and could already feel how wet the sheets were. “Hey, you don't have to be so scared. I'm right here, right next to you,” Dean said softly. But Castiel kept crying, holding Dean's index finger tight, as he was hiccuping and trying to calm down.

“I d-don't w-want them to h-huwt you!” Castiel managed to stutter.

“Hey, no one is going to hurt us, Cas. What do you mean? What did you see?” Dean calmly said, giving small kisses to the boy's forehead.

It took a few minutes of Castiel was panting and sweating, but slowly started to calm down. When he could talk again, he looked up at Dean, feeling so ashamed. “She will hurt you... I see her... The times she... Was in my head... And I am small and have no... No powers or wings... And can't protect you... And she... She is mean...” Castiel said, stuttering.

Dean immediately understood it was about Naomi. That bitch had hurt Cas more than Dean imagined. And if she wasn't dead, he would have made her pay for this. “We are safe Cas. We know how to protect ourselves and how to protect you. You don't need to protect us. Let us protect you and keep you safe for once.”

Castiel shook his head with a small whimper and Dean sighed. “What do you see… in your nightmares?” Dean asked.

“The stuff... She makes me forget... And the stuff I did” Castiel said, ready to cry again.

“Hey buddy, calm down, okay? It wasn't you that did all these things. The real you is nice, and soft. The real you is amazing. You are kind and caring, and emotional and always ready to help, no matter the cost. You are selfless, and generous. More than you think. Cas, what she made you do, it doesn't matter. What matters is how many times you saved us, how much you care and what relationships you built here,” Dean said, just feeling uncomfortable to talk about all these but knowing how much Castiel needed to hear that. Especially in the mind of a kid. “Everything is going to be alright, okay?” he smiled, and Castiel nodded. “Is that alright for me to sleep with you, from now on? Help you with your nightmares?” and Castiel nodded again. Dean couldn't help but smile and held the boy close to him, as Cas buried his face to Dean's shirt. Castiel whispered a small “Thank you”not sure if saying “I love you” would mean the same thing, and that was when he fell asleep.

———

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[bethofbells]

Cigarette smoke curled around his fingers, lazily drifting in the stagnant air of the diner. “Are you fucking kidding me?”

Police Chief Jim Hopper wasn’t one to mince words, and the soft man sitting across the table from him winced at the sharp tone of the question.

“Look Chief, it’s in her best interest and you know it.”

Hopper bristled at Dr. Owens’ tone. The man liked to call him “chief” when he wanted something, a misguided attempt to butter him up. Owens wanted El back, at least temporarily. Some bullshit about studying her abilities so he could help her understand them. He snuffed out the half smoked cigarette, grinding it down into his half eaten ham and egg sandwich. It was a signal that the conversation was over.

Owens’ expression changed when hopper pushed away from the dingy formica table. He scooted anxiously back in his chair, nearly knocking the damn them over in his haste. The diner had gone eerily quiet, clinking silverware and soft conversation suddenly stopping. Owens dropped his own voice down to a whisper, suddenly aware that whatever he said would be spread across the entire town before he could even get home. “Chief, listen to me, please. I’ve been looking through some of Brenner’s files--”

Hopper glared at him. “Bringing up that son of a bitch isn’t going to get you anywhere.”

Owens shook his head in frustration as Hopper turned to leave. Tossing money down on the table he rushed after him. “Jim, please. Brenner was a monster. What he did to those kids…” He opened and closed his mouth like a fish dying on dry land. “It’s… unspeakable, but… there are things in those files that make me think Jane might be a danger to herself and others.”

They were half way across the parking lot when Hopper stopped, swinging around to face the shorter man. “What do you mean, dangerous? She’s a kid.”

“The psionic abilities, particularly the telekinesis… they’re tied to her emotions, specifically fear and anger.”

Hopper jammed his hands down in his pockets. The wind was whipping at them, knifing its way between the buttons of his coat. Early January was almost unbearably cold in Hawkins. This conversation was needling him more than the wind. “Would you get to the god damned point, doc?”

“She’s a teeanger now, and her emotions are probably all over the place. She faces more challenges than any of the kids she’s going to be around will be prepared to understand. There’ll probably be flashbacks to some of the things Brenner did, she’ll form very strong emotional attachments to the few people she lets in close, and if those attachments are threatened or if she feels unsafe her body’s natural self preservation will kick in.” All his words ran together, barely pausing as he rattled off the dangers, watching hop’s expression closely. “And she’s a skinny thirteen year old girl, her only weapon against perceived threats is the telekinesis. She won’t always be able to control it, things will get broken, people might get hurt, and hurt badly.”

Hopper could feel his hands balling up into fists in his pockets, his jaw clicking as the muscle there flexed. “Owens, this isn’t some horror movie, Jane isn’t Carrie. She’s not shunned or bullied, she has people who love her.”

Owens shook his head. “Hopper, you know the kids in this town. It doesn’t matter who she is or who is around her, there will be a time when she’s enraged or terrified, and what happens then?’

The memory of glass flying through his cabin flashed through his head, El screaming at the top of her lungs as books and anything else not bolted down flew through the air, doors slamming. What if that happened at school? His throat constricted. The very idea that she might become some thing to be studied stuck in his craw. She didn’t deserve this, didn’t deserve to have electrodes taped to her head, didn’t deserve to be poked and prodded like some kind of lab animal. But… god, what would happen if she hurt someone, another kid?

Owen’s saw the shift in Hopper’s demeanor, the slightly far away look in his eyes. The doctor latched onto it. “Ah… it’s already happened hasn’t it?”

Hopper shook his head. “It’s not what you think. The poor kid… she’d spent a month out in the woods in the winter, trying to survive on barely cooked squirrels and huddling in piles of leaves.” And that was my fault. The voice echoed in his head, accusatory, regretful. “Then I basically locked her in my cabin for an entire year trying to keep her safe from the likes of you. She was stir crazy, and I kept… disappointing her… It wasn’t like what you say. Solitary confinement is torture.”

He couldn’t reconcile Owens’ Carrie-esque predictions with the child he knew. She was just a little girl who smiled up at him sweetly across the dinner table when he made stupid jokes, a child with a silky mop curls that slipped between his fingers when she tucked her head under his arm on the couch while he read to her. He couldn’t imagine the soft expression in her eyes ever turning to sharp rage like it once had. She was his daughter now, not some lab rat. He had to protect her, even from Owens’ well meaning nonsense. He opened his mouth to tell the man to go to hell, but he ended up just staring open-mouthed like an idiot.

Sighing, Owens reached into his pocket. “I have a new family practice over on Birch street.” He handed Hopper his card. “Call me if something happens. I still think I can help.”

And with that, the doctor left. Hopper watched, frozen in place, a sense of foreboding curling into this chest like the smoke of his last cigarette. Owens climbed into his sleek car and eased on down the road. Suddenly Hopper didn’t feel the cold anymore, just the little piece of cardstock burning in the palm of his hand. Fuck.

-

Joyce Byers had forgotten what it was like to not worry. The thing that liked to sit on her chest twenty-four/seven had become almost a comforting companion. When she finally woke up one day and it was gone, instead of relief she felt trepidation. The universe wouldn’t simply let her be. It felt too good to be true.

Will seemed better, happy even. No far away looks or zoning out, no fear creeping along the periphery of his movements. When he smiled these days it was as though light emanated from him, and Joyce always felt her own expression brighten. Sure, he had nightmares. With what he’d gone through it would have been unusual if he didn’t, but even they seemed more manageable. When he woke up in the middle of the night, terror gripping him, sweaty and anxious, it only took a few moments of talking through the horror for him to relax back into normalcy. He assured her, over and over again, that these dreams didn’t feel like the episodes before, that they were dreams and nothing more. She believed him.

One less thing to worry about right? Except, her body didn’t feel like it was made to be worry free. Tension knotted up her shoulders, and sometimes she held her breath without realizing it, suddenly gasping for air at the strangest times. She was waiting. For what? She didn’t fucking know, but something was bound to happen. It always did.

She called Don and told him she was sick, the sense of baseless dread making her not want to leave the house. It was a mistake probably. She’d gone through half a pack of smokes in less than three hours. At least at Melvad’s she had busy work, things to keep her from spinning out. Here it as just… utter silence. With the boys at school the house was too quiet. She could hear her own heart beating, the soft rattle of her own breath. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the sound of a vehicle pulling into her driveway.

Fingers parting the blinds, she peered out across her yard. Hop’s blazer, dull brown matching the dead foliage littering the ground, matching his uniform. He was frowning, not an unusual expression, but worrisome nonetheless. She hadn’t spoken to him since the night of the Snow Ball. She didn’t like leaning on people, and he had been so easy to lean on, easy to need. Boundaries blurred too easily with him, and she’d found herself looking up at him, the stars a twinkling backdrop for his broad silhouette, soft music floating out into the cool night air, wondering what it would be like to really sink into his embrace. Ridiculous romantic bullshit, totally inappropriate, needy even. She was a woman in mourning, sadness etched into her very bones. It had been best to put some distance there.

But Jim Hopper was rapidly closing that distance in long strides coming toward her front door, serious look on his face enough to shake her out of whatever weird fugue she was in.

She swung the door open before he could knock on it, unable to hide the concern on her face. “Hop? What is it? The boys--”

He cut her off, shaking his head. “No, nothing like that. Shit, I should have called first. Sorry.”

He swept his hat off, looking somewhat contrite as he held it in front of him, waiting to be invited it. When did things get so formal? She moved out of the doorway, gesturing for him to follow toward the kitchen. It seemed like the most natural place in her house to have a conversation, and he looked like something was weighing heavily on him. She tried to keep the fluttering of her nerves out of her voice. “Coffee?”

He nodded, fingering the rim of his hat as he watched her move around the kitchen. “I stopped by Melvad’s earlier and Don said you were sick.”

She blushed, suddenly feeling like a kid being interrogated by the principle. She sat down across from him at the table, looking down at the steam wafting away from the coffee cups. “I hope you didn’t come all the way out here just to check on me.” Sheepishly she sipped at her coffee. “I’m kind of playing hookie today.”

His eyes narrowed somewhat, assessing her. Big city detective Hopper deducing that she wasn’t telling the whole truth. It made her shiver. “Are you sure about that Joyce?”

She ignored his question, cocking her head to the side and doing some assessing of her own. He looked tired, circles under his eyes, facial hair not quite stubble yet not quite a beard. His expression was pinched, brows knitted, jaw clenched a little too tight. Something was bothering him. “Do you want to sit here and have small talk over coffee, or do you want to tell me why you drove all the way out here in the middle of the day, Jim?”

His gaze jerked away from the reflection in his coffee, the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “I just… I really don’t want to pull you back into this shit again.”

”Too late now, spill it.”

”Has Will said anything to you about Ellie doing things that, uh… scare him?”

”No, why?” She tried to keep the alarm out of her voice, but it peaked through anyway, her pitching rising an octave.

”I had breakfast with Owens this morning.”

Joyce frowned. “Is she sick?”

Hopper sighed in frustration, rubbing one hand down his face. “He’s worried she won’t always be able to control her abilities, that she might hurt someone, you know… if her emotions get too volatile.” Taking a deep breath, he continued. “He seems to think if he studies her, then he can teach her to control it.”

”Will hasn’t said anything about it, but…”

”What?”

”There’s another girl, one that El doesn’t like. Will’s mentioned that she’s been unusually clumsy lately. You don’t think--”

”Oh hell.”

”Surely not.”

”They’re kids, Joyce. Don’t tell me you never wanted to trip someone, tie their shoelaces together, whatever.”

Joyce cringed. Remembering what it was like to be a jealous teen girl… She could think of a few of her classmates that were lucky she didn’t have telekinetic abilities. “She may not even realize she’s doing it, right?”

”I don’t know which is worse, honestly.” He groaned in frustration. Picking up his hat, he jammed it back on his head, ready to leave. “I’m so out of my god damned element here. I don’t know the first thing about thirteen year old girls.”

Joyce followed him to the door, reaching out to grab his arm at the last second. “Maybe I could help. I used to be one, you know, even if it was a hundred years ago.” She gave him a soft smile, wanting to take the pained expression off his face.

[dukereviewstv]

Duke Reviews TV: Smallville 1x07 Craving

Hi Everyone, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews TV Where Today We Are Continuing Our Look At Smallville By Talking About Episode 7 Of Season 1, Craving...

This Episode Is About A Girl Named Jodi Melville (Played By The DCEU'S Future Lois Lane, Amy Adams) Who Is A Overweight Teen Obsessed With Losing Weight Who Begins A Diet Plan Of Vegetable Shakes (A Solid Regimen, Right) But What If I Told You That These Vegetables Were Grown In Meteor Rock Contaminated Soil?

That's What I Thought...

Anyway These Contaminated Vegetables Are Causing Her To Lose So Much Weight That Regular Food Isn't Satisfying Her Anymore But Unfortunately The Fat Of Other People's Are. Meanwhile, Lex Becomes Interested In Chloe's Wall Of Weird Theory That He Begins Funding The Research Of A Controversial Mineralogist (Played By Terminator 2's Joe Morton)

So, Let's Dive Into Craving To See If Clark Can Stop This Fat Sucking Vampire?

The Episode Starts At The Melville House As We See Jodie (Played By Amy Adams) Picking Vegetables That Are In Meteor Rock Soil While Her Father Talks About Dinner That Night But Jodie Has No Interest On Eating Anything That He's Eating As She Wants To Lose Weight By Eating Just Vegetables...

Watching Jodie Place Her Head On A Bunch Of Magazine Supermodels Chloe And Pete Talk With Jodie About Helping Them With Algebra As Clark Is Busy Helping Lana With Her Party Accepting Despite Them Offering To Buy Her Lunch They're A Little Grossed Out By What She's Drinking...

But Then 2 Jocks Come By To Ask Pete To Join Their Game While Making Fun Of Jodie...

Oh, I Get It Her Name's Melville And Herman Melville Wrote Moby Dick, Ha Ha Ha When Did Bullying Become A History Lesson?

With Pete Telling The One Jock Dustin To Back Off, Dustin Ends Up Throwing His Ball Into Jodie's Drink Which Goes All Over Her Shirt...

Embarrassed About What Happened At School, Jodie Continues To Drink Vegetable Shakes Despite Her Father Telling Her That She's Beautiful The Way She Is But All Jodie Cares About Is Losing Weight And Nothing Else...

Going To The Bathroom, Jodie Goes On The Scale To See That She Has Lost Some Weight And Her Body Is Getting Thinner Then She Looks In The Mirror To See Her Face Get Thinner, Getting On The Scale We See She's Lost A Little Bit More Weight...

Meeting With A Doctor, Lex Discovers That He Has A Highly Elevated White Blood Cell Count But Lex Says That That's Not Possible As He Doesn't Get Sick, Asking Him Various Questions (If He's On Any Medication, If He Has Any Allergies, Any Childhood Illnesses To Which He Says Asthma)...

Saying That If This Was Anywhere Else, He'd Order Of Battery Of Tests, Wanting To Know Why Not, The Doctor Tells Lex That Some People Believe That The Luthorcorp Plant Is Poisoning The Environment...

Meanwhile At Lana's House, Lana And Clark Talk While Nell Works On Her Birthday Party Which Is Going To Be At The Luthor Mansion, But Lana Says That It Stopped Being Her Birthday Party A Long Ago And That If She Had It Her Way It Would Be Just Pizza And Loud Music With Her Friends...

Well, It's Your Birthday, Why Don't You Tell Nell This Instead Of Clark, I'm Sure She'd Understand...

But Turns Out Lana Is Giving Nell This Because They've Been Through A Lot In The Past Few Months, Which Is In This Reviewer's Opinion The Most Poorest Reason Ever...

Anyway, Whitney Comes By With Some Good News Turns Out He Has An Audition For Kansas State, Bad News Is He'll Have To Miss Lana's Party But Of Course, She's Fine With It...

Talking With Chloe And Pete, Pete Sees Whitney Being Gone As Clark's Opening With Lana But As They Continue Talking Jodie Says Hi To Pete Which Is When They Notice How Much Weight She's Lost...

Saying That She Looks Great, Jodie Thanks Pete For Sticking Up For Her Yesterday And Asks Him Out To Lana's Party To Which Clark Says Yes For Pete As He's Speechless But Chloe Is A Little Confused On How Jodi Lost All That Weight...

Stopping By The Kent Farm After School, Lana Gives Jonathan And Martha The Produce Order For The Party Saying That Nell's Planning This Like A Royal Wedding...

Well, If She Is Then Does Make You Meghan Markle, Because If You Are Boy, Do I Have A Few Things To Say To You...

Start Following The Royal Way Of Life Instead Of Doing Things Your Way...

Stop Acting Like A Disney Princess

Come Up With Better Baby Names...

Coming In With 2 Things Of Apples, Clark Talks With Lana Who Tells Him That All This Attention Is A Little Unnerving Which Leads Clark To Ask If He Could Be Her Escort On Saturday To Fend Off Her Fans So To Speak To Which Lana Says That She'd Like That But He Wants Him To Promise Her That This Time He'll Make It To Which He Does...

Making Another Vegetable Shake, Jodie Tells Her Dad About Her Date With Pete To Which He's Thrilled However He Wants Her To Eat A Little More Than Those Vegetable Shake Which She Does However Despite Eating Everything In Her Fridge Including Chicken, Hot Dogs, Chocolate Cake Etc... Nothing Satisfies Her...

Going To Pick Up Food, Jodi Accidentally Hits A Deer, Which She....

I Didn't Know Giselle From Enchanted Was A Cannibal....

Actually, She Didn't Eat The Deer, She Just Sucked The Fat Out Of Him But Still It's Scary Enough To The Point I Nearly Crapped My Pants...

Clark Watches Lana And Whitney As Whitney Gives Lana Her Birthday Gift But Chloe Interrupts To That Authorities Found The Deer That Jodi Hit Last Night, But Worried About More Important Things Than Deer Carcasses Chloe Says If She Helps Her She'll Him With His Lana Gift Dilemma...

Agreeing Clark Gets Chloe In To Which Clark Says Looks Like Jerky But The Report Says That The Deer Lost About 80% Of It's Body Fat...

Back At The Luthor Mansion, Lex Looks At The Smallville Torch Website While Jodi's Father Talks To Her Saying That He Has To Leave Town For A Few Days To Talk To A Client And Wants To See Jodi Before He Goes But Saying That He Can't As She's Indecent Has Him Worried That His Daughter May Need Professional Help...

But Turns Out The Reason He Can't Enter Is Because There's Food On The Floor That Didn't Satisfy Her...

Visiting The Torch, Lex Sees Chloe's Wall Of Weird Which Clark Explains To Him. Believing That It's An Interesting Theory Lex Talks With Clark About The Meteor Shower And What Happened All Those Years Ago With His Father...

With Chloe Returning, Lex Says He Likes Her Theory And Asks If She's The Only One Who Believes That The Meteors Are Behind Everything And Not The Luthorcorp Plant As Everyone Else Believes Which Leads Chloe To Suggest For A Mr. Hamilton..

Running Into Jodi In The Hallway, Pete Asks Why She Wasn't In Class With Her Saying That She Had Stomach Flu But She'll Be Fine. With Pete Telling Jodi If She's Not Up For Tomorrow He'll Understand, Jodi Tells Him That There's No Way In The World She Would Miss It...

Feeling Hungry Again, Jodi Runs Into Dustin Who Made Fun Of Her Earlier And Decides To Use Him To Slate Her Hunger...

Running Into Lana At The Football Field, She Tells Clark That She Told Nell To Make The Final Decisions Without Her Which Leads Clark To Ask If She's Ever Had A Happy Birthday Which Leads Her To Talk About One Time She Went To A Drive In With Her Parents...

Hearing A Noise After Talking To Lana, Clark Uses His X-Ray Vision To See Jodi Feeding On Dustin But By The Time Clark Gets There Jodi Is Gone And The Only Thing He Finds Is Dustin Barely Alive...

Finding This Mr. Hamilton (Played By T2's Joe Morton) Lex Talks With Hamilton About His Latest Condition And On How It May Be Connected To The Meteors And How He Would Like To Fund His Research But He Has No Intention Of Working For Lex Saying That His Research Is Private However, Lex Leaves The Door Open If He Wants To Change His Mind..

Back At School Chloe Tells Clark That Dustin Is In A Coma Which Leads Them To Come Back To The Idea Of A Fat Sucking Vampire, Sitting Down With Jodi For Their Study Group They Notice Her Eating A Lot But Just Says That She's Starving. With Chloe Thinking What They Saw Was Weird, Clark Takes Off To Deal With Lana's Birthday Gift...

Meanwhile At The Luthor Mansion, Set Up For Lana's Party Is Underway But Lex Knows That It's Not Her In Anyway While Also Giving The Hint That He May Have Set Up The Kansas State Audition For Whitney...

But As Clark Gets Ready For The Party, Chloe Comes In Saying That It Was Jodi's Car That Hit The Deer And What's Worse Her House Is Built Near One Of The Meteors Hit...

Getting Dressed For The Party It Seems Like A Fairy Tale...

But Then Jodie Gets Hungry, And Decides To Back Off Because She Doesn't Want To Hurt Pete...

(Start At 0:08, End At 0:13)

Finding Jodi In The Kitchen, She Attacks Pete And Tries To Suck His Fat But Luckily Clark Arrives Causing Her To Run It Into The Greenhouse...

With Clark Weakened By The Meteor Rocks, Jodi Attacks Clark With A Shovel Which Leads To A Fight Between The Two. But Looking At Her Reflection, Jodi Realizes What She's Become And Decides To End It..

With The Greenhouse Blown Up, Clark Saves Jodi As Pete Wakes Up...

Meanwhile At Her Party, Lana Feels Like This...

But A Talk With Lex About His Experience At Luthor Christmas Parties Which Makes Everything All Right?

Returning To The Kent Farm, Clark Tells Jonathan And Martha That Besides Pete Having A Headache, Jodi's On Her Way To Metropolis To Be With Her Father But None Of That Matters Right Now As Clark Is Too Upset Over Missing His Date With Lana. But He Realizes That Not Everthing Is Ruined...

Meanwhile At The Luthor Mansion, Lex Finds Out That He Has A Clean Bill Of Health And Decides To Tell Hamilton About It But He's Like Do I Give A Damn About Your Health? Finding Out Why Hamiton Was So Resistant To Him, He Tells Lex To Get Out But Still He Gives Him A Check To Fund His Research...

Oh, Wait He's Not Carrying A Stereo, My Bad...

Visiting Lana, Clark Apologizes For Missing The Party But He Wants To Make It Up To Her By Giving Her Her Birthday Gift Which Turns Out To Be A Drive In Movie...

However It Turns Out That They Were Shrunk By Ant-Man And The Wasp!

No, Just Kidding But Still Wouldn't It Be Funny If That Actually Happened But That's Craving And It's All Right...

The Entire Episode Is All Right I Don't Really Have A Problem With The Episode In General. However I Do Have A Problem With The Villain, Jodi, When She's In Movies I Like, I Love Amy Adams However Though I Didn't Mind The Character Of Jodi It Just Felt Like The Writers Were Walking On A Deadly Tightrope When Writing This Character Cause In The Wrong Hands The Character Could Definitely Send A Bad Message But Despite My Logical Implications On Sending A Good Or Bad Message I Say See It...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off...