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inmyglenpowellera · 7 months ago

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Bad Reputation Part 2 | Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Taylor Swift inspired!OC

Request: Requested by @akornsworld

Word Count: 9678 words

Summary: There's that saying for some people, “You can't go home again.” When you grow up and leave, that's it, you don't go back home. Presley Joann Benjamin (stage name Presley Jo) believed that was the case for her. Never did she think she would be right back where she started. But her Aunt insisted it was the best for her. She thought for sure her life and career were over until she meets a certain cocky aviator.

Warnings: Alcohol use, angst, maybe some cursing, fluff, crying, Jake being an absolute gentleman

A/N: SURPRISE, I'm not dead, life just sucks ass. Here's an extra-long chapter to make up for my sucking. Hope you like it, I promise the next chapter will have the sexuals. The tag list will be at the end of each chapter.

Chapter 1 Chapter 3

You’d think that after Hangman’s smug answer of still getting my number and buying me a drink, he would have immediately jumped at the opportunity to do so. But that wasn’t the case, much to my confusion. I continued showing up to The Hard Deck to help Penny with various tasks before opening, seeing the aviators there every time, minus Bradley who was apparently out of town packing his items in Virginia to send here. (The Dagger Squad has recently become a permanent fixation in Fightertown). However, despite the number of times I have seen the blonde aviator in the past week, he has yet to make another attempt at getting my phone number. Sure there was still the near-constant flirting, but otherwise nothing.

I was, once again, playing the piano in The Hard Deck, losing myself in the music, when the front door burst open and caught Penny and I’s attention.

“Now I know that beautiful piano playing can only come from my very own star student,” a voice yelled out as they walked into the bar.

I let out a squeal of glee at the sight of a Hawaiian shirt, mustache, and aviators walking further into the bar.

“Bradley,” I called out, running over to him and jumping into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist.

“How you doin’ Queenie? I leave for a month to pack up my old place and you move back into town,” Bradley greeted me with an equal amount of excitement, holding me up by my thighs and spinning me around before releasing me.

“I’m great, Killer. Glad you’re back. It’s been boring here with Penny and Mav. The only amusement I have is Amelia,” I told the older male.

“Now I know that’s a lie,” Maverick said as he walked in the door behind us.

“You know I’m joking, Mav,” I called out to him as he walked past us towards Penny.

“That's not what he's talking about,” Penny smirked at me with a knowing look.

I widened my eyes and slightly shook my head.

“What are they talking about,” Bradley asked me, going into protective older brother mode.

“Nothing, ignore them,” I reassured him, shrugging the two older adults off.

Bradley nodded in acknowledgment before a look of concern took over his face. “Hey, do you want to talk about it?”

I didn’t have to have so many hints to know what he was referring to. “Not right now. You’re back and I’m happy. Let’s not bring down the mood.”

Bradley nodded at me in understanding before gripping my hand in his own.

“But you know what would make my mood even better,” I offered up.

“What,” Bradley asked me curiously.

“If you play our song,” I requested, leading him towards the piano.

“Oh, god. Please don’t make me,” Bradley groaned sarcastically, willingly following me towards the piano.

“Pleeeeease,” I begged him with a grin.

“Fine,” he agreed, sitting on the bench with me.

“Yay,” I cheered, wrapping my arms around him in a quick hug.

Bradley settled in and ran his fingers over the keys, lightly playing a few before settling his fingers on the correct keys.

“Do I really have to play it right now,” Bradley slightly whined.

“Yes, it's been so long since you played me the only song you helped me write,” I nudged him.

“You wrote it, I merely assisted with occasional input. You should be the one to play it,” he argued with me.

“Bradley Nicholas Bradshaw, just play the damn piano,” I said sternly, focusing a glare on him.

“Alright, alright,” he huffed out.

Bradley began playing the opening notes to my song “Ours.” He nudged me to try and get me to sing, but all I did was shake my head with a hesitant smile. He furrowed his brows, concern in his eyes for a brief moment before he looked back at the piano. I quietly watched him play and propped my head on his shoulder as he did. I could see Penny and Mav working and watching the two of us out of the corner of my eye, whispering to each other now and then. I rolled my eyes at the two of them and continued watching Bradley until the front door opened again. I tensed up and Bradley stopped playing, moving to wrap his arm around my shoulders and place a kiss on the top of my head.

“Hangman, you’re early,” Mav said to the blonde aviator in surprise.

“Yeah, well, nothing wrong with being ahead of schedule,” He explained to Mav with his classic Hollywood smile.

I rolled my eyes at his words and sighed, leaning further into Bradley.

“Well congratulations on being early, Hangman, why don’t you go ahead out to the beach and claim your spot for the day,” Bradley offered up, trying to get rid of him for me.

“I will, once I get a beer,” Jake told him, moving to stand in front of Penny.

The woman nodded and started grabbing it for him, causing him to turn and lean against the bar, his stare burning into the side of my head, unrelenting. I removed myself from Bradley’s side and placed my hands on the keys, filling the silence of the space once again. Bradley placed his hand on my knee while I played and nudged me now and then in an attempt to mess me up. I would just laugh and nudge him back and continue playing until Jake spoke up.

“What, no good morning for me, Darling?”

I stopped playing and briefly glanced up at him with a blank face. “Good morning, Hangman.”

Jake’s face became a look of confusion at me calling him “Hangman” instead of “Jake” or “Mr. Eastwood.”

“So you two have met already,” Bradley realized, his hand on my knee tightening slightly.

“Yep,” I said simply, continuing my playing.

“Why didn’t you tell me,” He asked me curiously.

“Because it was nothing worth discussing,” I informed him, ignoring the hurt look that briefly flashed on Jake’s face.

“I’m sure that’s not true sweetheart,” Jake tried arguing.

“It is. Considering you haven’t said much to me since then,” I argued with him, looking up at him with a blank face.

Jake remained silent, staring at me in deep thought. All I did was shrug at him and gesture my head towards the back door.

“Looks like your beer is ready for you Hangman. Better go claim your spot on the beach before everybody else shows up.”

The five of us went silent after my words, Jake staring at me in shock. The silence remained for a few seconds before Mav cleared his throat.

“Presley, we left a few things in Bradley’s truck, you wanna help him grab them real quick and take them down to the beach?”

I silently nodded at him before standing from the piano bench. I gripped Bradley’s hand in my own and pulled him out the front door with me to the Bronco. What I missed when I was exiting was Jake glaring at our hands with disdain.

A few hours later, Dogfight football was over and the aviators were clearing out to go home and clean up before returning to the Hard Deck for Friday night drinks. Mav and Bradley returned inside to tell Penny and me they were leaving and would be back later. I smiled at the two men in acknowledgment and wrapped myself around Bradley like a koala bear once again, causing him to laugh and place his hands under my thighs. Our laughs were cut off by the back door of the bar opening and Hangman walking in, a small garbage bag in his hands. He looked between the two of us and glared, rolling his eyes before looking at Penny.

“Penny my dear,” He called out, causing Penny to turn to him. “Where do you want me to put this?”

“Oh, you can go ahead and take it out to the dumpster. Presley, can you show him where it is,” Penny called back to me.

I sighed and nodded, Bradey releasing me back to the ground. I began walking towards the kitchen doors, through the kitchen, and to the side door that leads to the dumpster.

“You know, I didn’t realize you had a boyfriend. If I knew that I wouldn’t have tried to get your number,” Jake said to me as he walked past me and threw the trashbag in the dumpster.

“I don’t have a boyfriend,” I told him, furrowing my brows in confusion. “And don’t use that as an excuse for how you have been the past week.”

“I’m not using it as an excuse, even though I have no idea what you mean. And I’m talking about how you have been acting today with Rooster,” Jake told me, placing his hands on his hips.

“Rooster,” I said in confusion.

“Yes, Rooster,” Jake nodded.

I stared at him for a second with confusion still on my face. “Who the fuck is Rooster?”

“Bradshaw,” He supplied for me.

Realization ran over me like a truck. “Bradley?” Jake nodded at me. “Bradley Bradshaw?”

“Yes,” Jake told me impatiently.

“Bradley’s not my boyfriend,” I told him with a shake of my head.

“He’s not,” He asked me in confusion.

“No. He’s not. He’s like my brother,” I explained to him.

“Oh…,” Jake said meekly.

“Jesus Christ,” I sighed out to myself, shaking my head and moving to go back inside.

“Well, can I get your number then,” Jake called after me.

I stopped in my tracks and looked back at him. “No,” I shouted at him in disbelief.

“Why not,” He asked me in an offensive tone.

“Why not? Did you seriously just ask me that,” I questioned him back in disbelief. “I can list off all of the reasons if you would like me to. Let’s start with the fact that you basically ignored me all week and just made a little flirtatious comment here and there.”

“I wouldn’t say I ignored you,” He argued with me.

“Really? Then what would you call it, Hangman,” I questioned him.

Jake went quiet as he looked up at the sky in thought, trying to decide what he was going to say.

“Exactly,” I scoffed.

“Okay, fine, I’ll admit that my actions the past week haven’t been the best. But please don’t let that affect the image you have of me. I’m just Jake, stop calling me Hangman,” Jake shrugged at me.

“Should I also add on the fact that you thought the guy who I grew up with was my boyfriend,” I offered up, causing him to wince.

I once again rolled my eyes and turned around, opening the door to go back inside. I made it halfway through the kitchen before Jake grabbed my arm and stopped me from walking any further.

“Okay, Presley, I’ll admit it, I was a jackass. A complete Jerk. I’m sorry. Just, please give me a chance to show you the real me. Okay? Not Hangman, Jake. Let me get your number, let me take you on a date. Whether that is to just get drinks or an actual dinner,” Jake begged me.

“Why are you so desperate to go on a date with me, Hangman, huh,” I questioned him curiously, turning to look at him with a glare.

“First of all, I believe I told you to call me Jake,” he told me, raising a single finger in my face. “Second-”

He didn't get to continue when I cut him off by grabbing his finger and pulling his hand out of my face. “Don't put your finger in my face.”

Jake let a small smirk come over his lips before throwing his hands up in surrender and stepping back from me. “Sorry, Darlin’.”

“Don't call me Darlin’ either,” I demanded, imitating his accent and crossing my arms over my chest.

“How about sweetheart instead,” Jake offered up, his smirk widening as he shoved his hands in his shorts pockets. My glare hardened at his words, causing him to shrug in acknowledgment. “Alright, I get it, nicknames are off the table.”

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, shaking my head at him.

“What do you want from me? An autograph? Private show for you and your closest friends and family? The chance to say you went on a date with and stole “The Princess's” innocence? Because I can promise you, that ship sailed long ago,” I rattled off.

“Honestly,” Jake asked me, not taking his eyes full of clear amusement off of me.

“No, lie to me,” I sarcastically replied with an eye roll.

Jake let a chuckle of amusement escape before stepping close to me once again. “I want a chance.”

“A chance for what,” I huffed.

“A chance to be able to show you how you deserve to be treated. To stand on your doorstep holding flowers on our first date, tell you that you look absolutely beautiful before walking you to the car, where I will open the door for you and help you into your seat, which, FYI, won’t be the only time I open the door and help you into your seat that night. I want a chance to walk you back up to your door at the end of the night and tell you, for probably the thousandth time that night, how beautiful you look and tell you “No thank you, I don’t want to join you inside.” Because let’s be honest, you are going to be so impressed and obsessed with me by the end of the night you’ll want nothing more than to get me into bed with you, but you deserve more respect than that so I’ll just place a kiss on your cheek, tell you I’ll call you, watch you walk inside, and wait till I hear the lock click before leaving just to be sure that you got in safely.” He said softly with an equally soft smile, looking down at me with adoration in his eyes.

I shook my head at him with a small laugh of disbelief. “Is that all?”

“No. Finally, I want a chance to go home at the end of the night, and text you “Goodnight beautiful, sweet dreams”, you be the last thing on my mind before I go to sleep and the first when I wake up, and text you “good morning sweetheart” with a little winky face emoji despite how much I despise the use of them,” He finished, winking at me.

I stared at him in silence for a moment, taking him and his words in. Weighing the pros and cons in my head, the pros very obviously outweigh the cons in numbers but not in severity. I looked down at the floor, taking in my Converse and his sandals shoes before sighing and looking up at the aviator.

“My favorite flowers are white roses and blue baby’s breath, and I love Italian food,” I told him simply.

He held my stare, nodding in acknowledgment as he tried to hold back a smile. “Noted.”

I shook my head at him again and tried to force down my smile as well. “You can pick me up at 6. If you’re even a minute late, I’m changing into my PJs and watching rom-coms with Amelia.”

“Don’t plan on it, sweetheart,” He reassured me.

I shook my head at him in disbelief once again before turning to walk away from him. “See you tomorrow night.”

“I’m counting on it,” He called out to me as I walked away.

“Okay, what do you think,” I asked Amelia, turning around from my mirror for her and Theo to see the simple high-waisted skirt and tucked-in white button-up I was wearing.

I watched the teen and dog sitting on my bed tilt their heads as I spun around for them to see the whole outfit. I stopped when I was facing them again, watching them scrutinize me. They were silent for a moment before Theo released a small noise, causing Amelia to nod in agreement with him.

“Theo’s right, it’s not nice enough,” She hummed out.

I sighed in frustration and slapped my thighs. “Amelia, this is the third outfit I’ve tried on.”

“Well, keep trying stuff on because we haven’t found the right thing yet,” She told me, causing Theo to bark in what seemed like agreement.

I glared at the two of them before turning back towards my closet and going through my clothes again. I reached the section filled with dresses and began looking through them carefully when Amelia gasped.

“That’s the one! The little black dress, it’s a classic,” She squealed, hopping off my bed and grabbing it out of the closet.

I gasped at her before grabbing it. “Oh, no.”

“Why not,” She asked me in frustration, trying to grab it back.

“Because this dress is special. It’s a third date dress, at least,” I stressed to her, moving it out of her grip and hanging it back up.

“How is it a third date dress,” She argued with me.

I looked over the dress, taking in the straps that were just tied, meaning easy access. I cleared my throat before looking over at her and shrugging. “Reasons.” Amelia rolled her eyes and didn’t look like she was going to let her question go unanswered. “Look, you’re in high school, so you may or may not understand the concept, but when you start to get older you have certain clothing items that you deem third-date material.”

“Like…,” She trailed off.

I rolled my eyes before pointing at the dress. “Like a dress that you feel really… hot… in. Or a bra that shows off the goods.”

“A bra, really,” She asked in disbelief.

“Yes, I have a third date bra. Two actually,” I informed her, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Hm. Can I have a third date bra,” She asked me curiously, placing her hands on her hips.

I sat for a moment in silence, contemplating my answer. “I’ll get you one when you’re older,” I told her turning back to my closet.

I moved my black dress out of the way to look at the next dress, a hum escaping me at the light blue dress hanging in front of me. A simple mini dress with a tiered flowy bottom that ended about mid-thigh and instead of a zipper bringing together the back of the dress there were two bows to tie together.

“That’s it,” Amelia said from over my shoulder, Theo barking once again to seemingly voice his agreement.

I paired the dress with a pair of white stilettos and a white blazer. I lightly curled my light brown hair so it fell in waves and did a simple makeup look with my signature red lips. I decided to do a set of pearl earrings with a matching necklace and bracelet with my mom's rings resting on my right ring finger. I stepped back from my mirror and smoothed my dress down, turning around so I could see the back as well. I released a hum of appreciation for myself when I heard the doorbell ring at 6 o'clock on the dot. I listened to Theo barking and Amelia yelled out that she would get it. I widened my eyes and spun around to grab my clutch before booking it out of my room.

“No, Mia, I got it,” I yelled out to her, rushing through the hallway and down the stairs.

When I reached the bottom, I looked over to see a teenage girl with a dog sitting by her heels interrogating a grown adult man.

“What exactly are your intentions with my cousin,” Amelia asked Jake.

Jake released a chuckle, clutching the flowers in his hands closer to his chest. “I intend to take her to a nice dinner and treat her with the utmost respect.”

“Are you going to hold the door open for her and help her into her seat,” she questioned him, crossing her arms over her chest.

“That was the plan. You can ask her yourself,” he said with a light smirk.

“And if you touch her…,” Amelia trailed off.

“Nothing more than respectful hand-holding and a kiss on the cheek… with her permission of course,” Jake reassured.

“Good, because I may be tiny, but I know people and I have a dog that's ready to defend when necessary,” Amelia threatened Jake, causing his face to contort in amusement.

I chose this time to walk over to the door and wrap my arm around the teenager.

“Okay, Amelia, thank you,” I said to her as I steered her away from the door.

Once she was no longer facing Jake she dropped her stern expression and looked at me with a big grin. “I like him, keep him,” she whispered to me.

“Well, it's hard for me to decide if I want to keep him if I don't go on a date with him,” I whispered back to her, sending her and Theo on their way.

I turned back to the door to see Jake staring at me in amazement. I blushed as he raked his gaze up and down my form before he met my eyes. I let a small smile grow on my face and clasped my clutch in front of me.

“Hi,” I said softly.

“Wow,” Jake released a breath and nodded at me. “You didn't hold back did you?”

I raised my eyebrows in question, causing his smile to widen at my oblivious expression.

“You don't just look beautiful, Darlin’. You look angelic,” he told me.

“Angelic, huh,” I murmured, looking down at my feet before looking at him shyly from under my lashes.

The two of us stood in silence staring at each other for a few seconds before Amelia stepped forward once again.

“Are those for Presley,” she asked, gesturing to the flowers in Jake's hand.

The two of us broke our gaze, I whipped my head around to look at her briefly before looking quickly back at Jake. Jake briefly widened his eyes and looked down at the flowers before looking back up at the two of us.

“Uh, yes, they are,” he said, holding them out to me.

I accepted them and a smirk formed on my lips. “White roses and baby's breath.”

“Yeah, I heard someone say they were your favorite,” he smirked back at me.

I shook my head in amusement at him as Amelia spoke up again.

“I can put them in a vase for you if you'd like?”

I looked back at Amelia and nodded. “Yes, please, Amelia. I would appreciate that. Thank you.”

Amelia nodded back at me and took the flowers from my hands. “I'll put them in your room for you. You have fun.”

“Thank you, Amelia, we will,” Jake told the teenager, reaching forward to grab my hand and therefore sending my attention back towards him.

I raised my eyebrow at him and allowed him to pull me closer to him. Jake smiled at me and pulled me out the door, closing it behind us, and led me to his car.

“Why am I not surprised that you own a pickup truck,” I questioned rhetorically.

Jake's smile widened as he led me to the passenger side. He opened the door and looked at me before shrugging.

“It's part of the cowboy starter pack, along with a hat, boots, a flannel, blue jeans, and a really big belt buckle,” Jake replied sarcastically.

I smirked and shook my head at him. “Is that all?”

“Nope, it also comes with a certain charm that makes it very hard for a woman to say no to me,” He added, a smirk growing on his face too.

“Oh, really,” I asked in a sarcastic tone.

“Mhm,” He hummed.

I rolled my eyes and moved closer so I was standing right in front of him. “I don’t think that’s true.”

“Well, we’re here aren’t we,” Jake said, referring to our date.

I scoffed and went to reply to him, but I cut myself off with a squeal as Jake bent down to pick me up, delicately placing me in his passenger seat. I looked at him with wide eyes as he pulled the seatbelt from where it was resting and reached over me to buckle me in.

“I can do it myself,” I reminded him.

“I know. This way, if you try and run off from me before our date even starts, I know it will take you longer to get out of my truck,” He told me with a wink before closing the door.

I watched him walk around the front of the truck before climbing in on his side and starting the car. He reached over and placed one hand on my seat and looked behind him as he backed out with one hand. I watched with rapt attention and felt myself blush at his actions. Jake glanced over at me when he finished and smirked at my reaction, causing me to roll my eyes and my blush to darken as he drove off toward our destination.

I felt my eyes widen in shock at the restaurant he pulled up to, one of the most expensive Italian restaurants in San Diego.

“Jake, we don’t have to eat here,” I reassured him, glancing over at him quickly.

“You said you wanted Italian. I'm taking you to get Italian,” he told me, getting out of the truck and handing his keys to the valet, jogging around the vehicle to get to my side and open the door for me.

“I would have been perfectly fine with a hole-in-the-wall diner,” I explained, accepting his hand to help me out of the truck.

“Absolutely not. I'm getting the best food for the best girl. You deserve nothing less,” Jake told me, gripping my hand tightly in his and leading me into the restaurant.

“I just want to be sure that you brought me here because you wanted to, not because you felt like you had to because of who I am,” I argued with him, watching him pull the door to the restaurant open and hold it for me.

“Presley, I can promise you that I am bringing you here of my own volition,” Jake reassured me as I walked past him.

Jake held his arm out for me to wrap around before leading me up to the host stand.

“Reservation for Seresin,” Jake told the young woman.

The woman looked up with a bright smile which turned into shock when she saw me.

“Oh, my god. You're Presley Jo,” she gasped out.

“Yep,” I nodded at her looking around and hoping no one else said anything.

“I love your music. You are literally so amazing. I totally don't believe anything that's being said about you by the way. Especially not by that disgusting perv that is now your ex-manager,” she said quickly, causing me to become uncomfortable with the topic at hand.

“Okay,” I said awkwardly, tightening my grip on Jake's arm.

The young girl went to speak again but was cut off by who I'm assuming is the manager.

“Miss Benjamin, if we would have known you were going to be coming to our fine establishment we would have planned for your arrival a little better.”

“Oh, that's not necessary,” I reassured, leaning into Jake.

“Nonsense. I'll get the best table for you,” he told me, beginning to snap his fingers to get a worker's attention.

“That's not- whatever was originally set up for the Seresin reservation is just fine,” I reassured the man, but I was ignored as he walked away to get a table for us.

“So… is this what it's like every time you go out,” Jake asked me curiously after remaining silent the entire interaction.

I sighed and nodded, avoiding eye contact with him. “Sadly.”

We remained quiet for a second before I broke it.

“If you don't want to continue, I understand. You can take me home now and I won't say anything negative to Penny, Amelia, Maverick, or Rooster,” I reassured him, giving him an out if he wanted it.

“I'm not taking you home,” he argued with me.

“Jake, it's fine if you do,” I argued back.

“Presley Joanna Benjamin,” he said above me, causing me to go quiet and stare at him in shock, a slight heat pooling in my stomach at his tone of voice. “I am not taking you home. I said I was going to take you on a date and treat you how you deserve to be treated. Let me do that.”

“Fine,” I said reluctantly, blushing and looking at my feet.

“Thank you. Now enjoy yourself,” he told me, reaching down, grabbing my clutch out of my hand to hold in his own, and intertwining his empty hand with my own.

The manager returned and led Jake and me to our table, which was placed in the middle of the room for everybody to see. Everyone stared at the two of us as Jake pulled my chair out for me before going around the table to sit on his own. The waiter came and took our drink orders, wine for me, and whiskey for Jake. We were just beginning to look at the menus when a flash went off from next to me. I looked over to see a young girl with her family holding her phone up towards me.

“Oh, no. Please don't post that,” I begged the girl, beginning to push my seat back from the table.

Jake lifted his head and looked at me in confusion before following my gaze. He noticed the girl tapping on her screen and sighed.

“Presley,” Jake whispered to me, trying to get my attention.

“Seriously, please don't,” I begged her, ignoring him.

The girl looked up from her phone and smirked. “What, scared for everyone to find out you tricked another guy into dating you?”

I gulped at her words and fought back the tears.

“I never tricked anybody into dating me,” I told her quietly.

“Tell that to the paparazzi when they get here,” she said smugly before posting the photo.

I could feel the color drain from my face at her actions and continued staring at her phone in horror. I immediately grabbed my clutch off the table and stood from my seat.

“We have to go,” I announced to Jake.

“Presley, we just got here,” Jake argued with me.

“Yes, and believe it or not even though we live in San Diego, the paparazzi will be here in about 5 minutes, 10 if we're lucky. And considering I've been sneaking around and staying out of trouble, they're going to be even more desperate to get my picture,” I argued back with him, turning away from the table and beginning to walk to the exit.

“Presley, hold on, just wait,” Jake called after me, jumping from his seat and rushing after me.

I made it to the lobby of the restaurant before Jake grabbed my arm and stopped me in my tracks, pulling me towards him.

“Presley, let's just wait a second, okay,” he said calmly, soothingly rubbing my arms.

“I don't have time to just wait a second, Jake. What do you not understand about that," I told him, my frustration building.

“Pres, come on, just talk to me,” he begged me, leaning down to look into my eyes.

“I will be more than happy to talk to you in the car. Come on,” I told him, tilting my head towards the door.

“I'm not going to get the car, alright? Let's just sit down, have a drink, and-”

“I DON’T HAVE THE LUXURY TO JUST SIT DOWN IN PUBLIC AND HAVE A DRINK AND A NICE CONVERSATION, JAKE, OKAY,” I yelled, cutting him off.

Jake went quiet and stared at me in shock, dropping his hands from my arms and down to his sides. He opened his mouth to speak again, but I continued before he could.

“You’re asking me to do something I haven't had the luxury of doing in a very long time because people are always on my ass just waiting for the second I screw up all so they can capture it on film and sell it to the highest bidder. And if you want a good example of that, well just look at what they're saying about me right now all because I refused to let some perv use me to his advantage,” I blurted out.

“Presley-,” he started again.

“No you just don't get it, Jake, okay,” I cut him off, tears building up in my eyes from my frustration.

“Then help me to understand,” he begged me.

I looked into his bright green eyes and took a deep breath.

“This isn't something that I can explain and you just magically understand, Jake. This has been my entire life for the past 10 years,” I snapped out.

Right as I finished my statement, a crowd began forming out in front of the restaurant, flashes going off as the cameras pointed at us. I looked over and stared at them for a moment, sighing in frustration before looking at Jake.

“And now it's going to be yours for the next 10 minutes. Enjoy,” I shrugged at him, gesturing towards the large crowd before walking towards the exit.

“Presley,” Jake called out, trying to get me to stop. “At least let me drive you home,” he called out to me.

“No, thank you,” I called back to him, pushing the front door open and beginning my trek through the paparazzi.

All of them began shouting questions at me as the valet began trying to help me shove through the group. Asking me questions like where I've been hiding, what are my plans for my career, and the dreaded when will I speak out on what has happened? I kept my head down and pushed my way through the crows of yelling and flashing lights. When I reached the curb, the valet assisted me in calling a cab, waving his arm around to grab the attention of the car. I sighed out a quick thank you and handed him some spare cash I had in my clutch before climbing in and shouting my address to the driver and telling him to step on it. The last thing I saw as I drove away was Jake standing in the doorway of the restaurant with a heartbroken look.

When I got home I immediately walked up to the front door, dug my house keys out of my clutch, and unlocked the door. I walked in threw my keys down in the bowl and slipped my heels off as Theo came running around the corner to greet me. I turned and locked the door before throwing my clutch on the cabinet in the entryway.

“Hey, buddy,” I sighed, rubbing his head before walking into the living room.

“Hey, that was quick,” Amelia said to me in shock, looking over the back of the couch at me.

“We didn’t even make it to the appetizers,” I said blandly after releasing a groan.

“That bad,” Amelia asked curiously.

I walked into the living room and collapsed on the couch with a sigh. Amelia adjusted her blanket so it was covering the two of us and Theo hopped on the couch between the two of us after her actions. He spun around a few times before settling, his head resting in my lap.

“Some girl there posted a picture of me, the place was swarming with the paparazzi within 5 minutes,” I explained to her.

“Oh, Lee, I’m so sorry,” Amelia told me, adjusting herself so her head was resting on my shoulder in comfort.

“It’s okay, kiddo. It's not like it was your fault. It’s my fault for thinking I could live a somewhat normal life,” I reassured her, running my hands through her hair.

“So, did Jake drop you off,” She asked me curiously.

“No, I got into an argument with him and got a cab home,” I answered.

“Oh,” she groaned in sympathy for me. “Do you think you’ll give him another chance?”

“It’s not me giving him another chance you should worry about. It’s whether or not he’ll give me another one,” I explained. Amelia lifted her head and went to respond but I cut her off. “Let’s stop talking about my total disaster of a first date and just enjoy the rest of the night together.”

“Okay, fine,” Amelia agreed reluctantly with a sigh.

“Great! Now what are we watching?”

“The Proposal.”

“I love it. I’ll get changed and get snacks,” I told her, moving to get up from the couch.

Amelia laughed as I walked out of the living room and towards the stairs, but I stopped when the doorbell rang.

“Amelia, are you expecting somebody,” I called out to the teenager.

“No,” She called back.

I walked up to the front door and flicked the lock, opening it to find Jake standing on the other side.

“Jake,” I said in shock, looking out behind him and up and down the street.

“None of them followed me if that’s what you’re checking for,” He reassured me.

I looked back at him and sighed. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to make sure you got home safely,” He explained, nervously looking down at his feet before looking me in the eye.

“Well, thank you,” I told him hesitantly.

Jake nodded at me in acknowledgment as the silence between us began to hang. The first awkward silence to ever occur between the two of us.

“You can-” “I just want to-”

The two of us spoke at the same time, causing both of us to immediately pause and stare at each other.

“What were you about to say,” Jake asked me, gesturing for me to go on.

“Oh, no. You can go first,” I reassured him.

“What I have to say can wait,” Jake told me.

“Jake, what I was going to say isn’t important. What were you going to say,” I asked him.

Jake stared at me silently, the furrow of his brow letting me know he was deep in thought, deciding what he was going to say.

“I just want to say, I'm sorry and you were right,” he released.

I stared at him in shock as he continued.

“I don't understand what you go through daily, or what you went through for the past 10 years. I don't understand how hard it must be for you to try and do anything normal because I've never experienced your life myself. Seeing what you were going through tonight, the good and the bad, made me realize how different we and the lives we live are,” he told me, causing dread to build in my stomach, knowing the next words to come out of his mouth are going to break me.

“But that doesn’t change the fact that I would love nothing more than to get to know you and for you to talk to me. Help me understand what it is that you deal with in your life. Tell me what I can do to earn your trust and support you. Because, darlin’, I plan on being here for the long run.”

I widened my eyes in shock at his words and felt tears well up in my eyes as well. I have never had a guy step up and tell me such things. They’ve always been takers. People are more interested in my fame than in working to understand me for who I am. Who I can be when you take away that part of me. I took a deep breath and then released it, looking at my feet briefly before looking back at the blonde aviator.

“If you’ll have me, that is,” Jake added nervously, clearly concerned about my silence.

I gave him a soft smile. “I think that can be arranged.”

I could see Jake visibly relax at my words. It was almost as if he had 100 pounds of weight lifted off of his shoulders. His nervous look changed to one of glee, and he turned his charm back up.

“Thank goodness, because I didn’t know what I was going to do with this if you said no,” Jake said, reaching over to the side of the porch.

I watched him lift a plastic bag with a couple of styrofoam containers, a bottle of wine wrapped in a brown paper bag, and a large pizza box. I chuckled in amusement while shaking my head before looking at the man with a questioning look.

“I promised you Italian,” He said simply with a shrug.

“You are…,” I trailed off, not knowing the exact words I wanted to use for the man.

“Hopefully the words you are looking to end that with are all positive,” He said with a grin. “Can I come inside? We can talk everything over.”

I grinned and went to answer, but I was cut off by a voice whispering “Say yes” behind me. Jake and I shared a look of amusement and I released a small chuckle.

“You know, I was unsure about my answer at first, but I just have this small, nagging, annoying voice telling me I should let you in,” I told him with a smirk.

“Hey,” Amelia whined out at my insults.

Jake released a chuckle at the teenager as well and peeked slightly in the door to see the teenager hiding around the corner.

“Well, I think you should listen to the all-knowing and wise voice,” Jake directed at me while looking at Amelia and giving her a wink. “Especially because the pizza is getting colder as we speak.”

I shook my head at him in amusement before opening the door wider. “Would you like to join me upstairs?”

Jake’s smile widened before nodding. “I would love nothing more.”

Jake walked in the door and removed his shoes, placing them next to my own. I turned around to make my way to the kitchen to grab a wine opener and glasses, but I was shocked to find my teenage cousin standing in the doorway already holding the items out to me. I shook my head at her in amusement before stepping forward and accepting the items from her.

“Raincheck on The Proposal,” I asked her with a pout.

“Ryan Reynolds will just have to wait,” Amelia agreed with an exaggerated sigh.

The two of us laughed together before I turned and led Jake upstairs to my room. Jake followed me silently through the hallway until we reached my bedroom, taking in everything while I closed the door, leaving it open a few inches. Jake set everything on my desk while I grabbed my blanket off of the bed and laid it down on the floor, grabbing a few pillows and laying them down as well. Jake removed his leather bomber jacket with all of his navy patches and rested it over the back of my desk chair. I took a seat on the floor and he followed me soon after, placing the food on the floor before taking a seat.

“I have to say, I didn’t think this would be the first time I would be in your room,” Jake told me with a smirk as he grabbed the wine opener.

“Yeah, what was that you told me about saying no to coming upstairs on the first date,” I questioned him smugly, leaning back against my bed.

“Hey, now. This is different,” Jake defended with a smile of amusement, a brief chuckle escaping him as he pulled the cork out of the wine bottle.

“Mhm, sure,” I agreed sarcastically, holding my wine glass out towards him to fill.

“It is,” He argued with me as he filled my glass.

“How so,” I asked him curiously.

“Well, for starters, I said I would tell you no to coming inside at the end of our date, and it does not appear to be the end of our date yet,” Jake pointed out, gesturing to the spread of pizza and garlic bread laid out in front of us.

“Okay, you got me there,” I nodded at him as he filled his glass.

“And, I told you that you were going to be so impressed and obsessed with me that you will never want me to leave,” Jake finished off, setting the wine down and placing the cork back inside of it.

“Well what makes you think I’m not already impressed and obsessed with you,” I argued with him.

“I never said you weren’t,” Jake pointed out.

I rolled my eyes at him and chuckled. “Alright, fine. So I might be impressed already, but I don’t think I’ve quite reached the point of obsession yet.”

“Well, our night has only just begun,” Jake said smugly, winking at me with his Hollywood movie star smile.

“Well, then, here’s to my eventual obsession,” I said back just as smugly, holding my wine glass out towards him.

“To your eventual obsession,” Jake cheered with me, clinking his glass against my own.

The two of us drank our wine before digging into our food. Jake handed me a paper plate and napkin from the bag before opening the pizza box, the two of us letting out a groan at the sight of the pizza in front of us.

“Okay, just pick one,” He told me, moving the box closer to me.

“Oh, I get to pick first,” I asked him sarcastically.

“Yep, ladies first,” He told me with a bright grin.

“Are you sure? That’s quite the thing to bestow upon somebody,” I said sarcastically, leaning my head back against the bed.

“I’m positive. Go ahead darlin’,” He told me, nudging the box closer to me.

“Okay,” I told him, grabbing the slice I wanted and folding it so it was easier to eat. “Don’t judge how I eat my pizza. I roll it crust side out because I’m a lady.”

“Hey, no judgment here, honey,” Jake reassured me, grabbing a slice for himself and folding it as well.

I giggled at his actions and held it out to cheer him again before the two of us took a bite of our pizza, releasing groans of pleasure at the deliciousness.

“So, now that we have our date back on track, good food, good wine, and hopefully good company,” Jake listed off, looking over at me at his last words with a hopeful expression.

“Very good company,” I reassured him, taking a bite of my pizza.

“How about we get started on you helping understand everything about you,” Jake offered up.

I went quiet at his words and looked down at my lap. “Are you sure you want that?”

“Like I said Darlin’, I want to be in it for the long run,” He reassured me.

I sighed. “Like I said, this has been my life for 10 years…”

I told him everything. From being discovered to now. All the happy times, all the sad times. The joy of being recognized and winning awards. The sadness of rumors being spread and having my heart broken time and time again. The times when I was made the bad guy even though I did nothing wrong. Then I told him about what caused me to be sent back to San Diego in the first place.

“So what happened with your manager exactly,” Jake asked me curiously.

“Since the beginning, he always seemed a little off. It was almost like he was waiting for something to happen so he could slither his way in and take advantage of me. After my most recent breakup, I was receiving more hate than usual. He started putting in my head that I was losing everything and I was about to be a nobody. A washed-up pop singer who had it all one day then nothing the next. I started to believe him and I was thinking “What am I going to do?” Then I realized that he was lying to me. He was just trying to brainwash me and weaken me.”

“Why,” Jake asked me.

“Because he was a disgusting pig who wanted me for himself. I confronted him about everything, he forced himself on me and said that I would have nothing if it weren’t for him. He told me if I fired him he would tell everybody about what I did to him. Which was nothing. I was nothing but good to him. He told me if I didn’t sleep with him and do whatever he wanted me to do that I was finished. So I told him I would rather be finished than used and abused like a slave. So I fired him and here I am now. Lies being spread about me left and right.”

I went quiet at the end of my explanation, looking down at my lap as I had tears build up in my eyes. Jake remained quiet for a moment as my tears began to stream down my face. I listened to Jake release a sigh before he placed a hand on my knee. He began soothingly rubbing my knee before speaking.

“I am so sorry you had to go through that Presley. You didn’t deserve it. Believe me when I say that and believe me when I say not everybody believes what is being said about you,” Jake reassured me.

“Thank you,” I whispered to him.

He nodded and removed his hand from my knee, bringing it up to wipe my tears from my face. I brought my hand up and grabbed his own, pressing it closer to my face and turning my cheek into his palm. Jake rubbed his thumb against my cheekbone and I turned my head more to press a kiss against the inside of his palm. I gripped his hand in both of mine and brought it down to my lap, intertwining my fingers with his own before looking up at him and looking into his eyes. Jake’s eyes softened when we made eye contact and I could see him release a deep breath that he was holding in. He squeezed my hand before breaking eye contact, looking down at the floor and releasing my hand.

“It’s late, I think I better-”

I cut him off by placing my lips against his own, causing him to gasp in surprise. It was a chaste kiss, an innocent press of the lips against each other for a few moments before I pulled away from him. I opened my eyes and watched Jake do the same, the two of us staring into each other’s eyes once again. Jake’s surprise turned into a smirk not long after I pulled away, and he placed his hand back on my cheek.

“Where do you think you’re going Darlin’,” He said smugly before placing his lips back on my own.

I couldn’t help but smile into the kiss as he continued placing his lips against my own in a dance only we knew with each other. I brought my hands up to wrap around his neck, pulling myself closer to him until I was pressed against him, moving to straddle his hips to become closer to him. Jake’s hands remained respectfully on my hips as we kissed, rubbing his thumb across my hip bone occasionally. I released my hold on his neck to thread one of my hands into the hair at the back of his head and trailed my other hand down to one of his own on my hip, guiding it farther south to rest on my cheek. I allowed myself to grind down on him briefly, causing him to groan into the kiss and break away.

“Darlin’, remember what I said about wanting to treat you how you deserve to be treated and being respectful,” Jake rasped out to me, pressing his forehead against mine. I hummed in acknowledgment of his question. “Well, right now, you’re making it very hard on me to do so, and I think we should stop now and I should leave before we do something we shouldn’t and I’m not able to stop.”

“Who said I want you to stop,” I whispered to him before placing my lips back on his, and he returned the kiss eagerly.

However, our continuation was short-lived by a bark and slobbery kiss being placed on the side of my face.

“Theo,” I groaned out, moving off of Jake so the dog could climb on top of me.

“Well, look at that. Saved by the dog,” Jake said smugly, causing me to glare at him in annoyance. Jake smirked back at me before standing from the floor. “Why don’t you walk me out, Darlin’?”

I sighed before nodding and standing from the floor, lightly pushing Theo off of me in the process. I gripped his hand in my own and walked through the hallway and down the stairs. I looked over into the living room to see Amelia asleep on the couch, Jake following my gaze with a small smile. I shrugged at him before leading him over to the front door.

“Thank you for tonight. I had a really great time,” I told him shyly, gripping his hand in my own.

“Well, I’m glad you did,” He nodded at me, stopping with me in front of the door.

“Maybe we can do this again,” I offered up, playing with his fingers.

“We definitely will, Darlin’. But next time, you're coming to my place,” he smirked at me.

I smirked back. “Is that wise? After what Theo just interrupted.”

“Oh, I can control myself, sweetheart. The question is whether or not you can,” he said smugly, leaning down closer to me.

“I guess we'll just have to wait and see,” I whispered, leaning in closer to him.

“I guess so,” Jake whispered back, leaning in to kiss me once again.

However we were interrupted by the door opening, Penny and Maverick stepping in through the front door. Jake and I froze while the two older adults stared at the two of us in shock.

“Fun night,” Penny asked smugly.

“Nothing happened,” I reassured her before grabbing Jake's hand in my own and leading him out the door.

Penny laughed while Maverick muttered curses under his breath. I shut the door behind me and looked up at Jake.

“Sorry, about that,” I apologized with a blush.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” he reassured me.

I grinned up at him before shaking my head. “I'll see you later then?”

“Definitely,” he nodded at me before leaning down and capturing my lips in another kiss. He pulled away after and smirked. “I had to get at least one more in before we were interrupted again.”

I sighed in frustration. “You sure you don't want to change your opinion on coming back upstairs,” I whined out.

“Trust me, sweetheart, I would love nothing more, but like I said, you deserve better than that,” he told me with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes and pouted at him, causing him to chuckle. Jake leaned forward placed a kiss on my forehead and whispered a “goodnight, sweetheart” before turning around and walking towards his truck.

“You remember this as the day you turned down a popstar,” I called after him.

“I definitely will,” he called back, not turning around.

“You're going to regret this,” I called out again.

“Already am beautiful,” he called back again.

“goodnight,” I called out to him, turning to open the door.

“Hey, Presley,” Jake called out, causing me to turn back around. “I told you you would be obsessed with me,” he smirked at me as he opened the door to his truck.

“Get out of here, Hangman,” I said while laughing, rolling my eyes at him.

I turned around and opened the front door, moving inside and turning around to see Jake standing and waiting for me to close the door. I waved one last time at him, him doing the same before I closed and locked the door. I released a dreamy sigh and turned to lean back against the door. I bit my lip to contain my smile and ran my fingers over my lips as I remembered what it felt like to kiss Jake.

“So, how was it,” Penny asked me curiously, peeking her head out of the kitchen.

“It started horrible but turned into one of the best nights of my life. He was a complete gentleman-”

“Good, I didn't want to have to threaten him,” Mav spoke up as he moved into view from the kitchen.

I rolled my eyes at the man before looking back at Penny.

“Tonight was… amazing,” I told her firmly.

“Good. So, will there be a second date,” she asked me curiously.

“I think there will be many dates,” I reassured her, moving to go upstairs.

“aw, my little girl is in love,” Penny cooed, placing her head on Maverick's shoulder.

“I wouldn't say that… but I think I'm going to stick around for a little while. I might even get my own place,” I shrugged at her before running upstairs as she gasped at my words.

“Presley Joanna, do not play with me like that,” she called after me.

I giggled as I walked into my room and shut the door behind me. I leaned against it and dropped to the floor as I reminisced about my night. I took in the blanket and pillows still sitting on the floor with our trash and glasses from the night. I just shrugged it off and decided to take care of the mess in the morning. I moved to go into my ensuite bathroom but paused in my steps when I noticed something different.

A dark brown leather bomber jacket with a patch reading Hangman still resting on my desk chair.

Taglist: @buckysteveloki-me @hookslove1592

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scribblesofagoonerr · 1 year ago

Text

Don't give up yet, I'm not letting you | Inner Demons

⟫ Alphabet Challenge, D- Don't give up yet, I'm not letting you.

Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader, arsenal wfc x teen reader

Back again with another part, I've had a really shitty day if I'm honest and so, umm, writing this now has sort of helped, I guess?

Once again nothing has been proof-read so yeah, it won't make any sense maybe and this ones' a bit longer than the rest but once I get carried away I just can't stop so this is definitely going to have a few more parts to this one. I just don't know how many that will be, so I guess we'll see what happens.

Thank you each and every single one of you for the response to this small fic series so far, I'm so glad that people are liking it so much.

The confession you have made leaves the room feeling a tense atmosphere, the girls will not let you give up so easily so they make a decision on your behalf to help you on the right path to get better.

tw: heavy angst, mentions of SH, MH, suicide and death.

"What... What does that even mean?" Katie furrows her eyebrows as she looks at you for a more logical answer.

"I'm tired, I'm so tired and I can't keep on fighting this battle anymore" You speak quietly, afraid to meet their eyes.

Each one of them really did mean so much to you, they all look heart broken with the what you had confessed.

Steph, the Aussie girl that made you feel so loved

Kim, your captain who always talked sense into you

Jen, the brave Scots' woman who you can rely on

Caitlin, the second Aussie that you love despite how annoying she is

Katie, the Irish girl who acts all tough but is a total softie

Beth, the blonde who gives great advice when you need it

Viv, the dutch who you cheers you up when she sneaks you ice cream

Lia, the swiss girl that gives you the best hugs sometimes

& Leah, the one who stuck around and made you feel at home

Your family, you would really miss them all.

However, you knew it was time.

It was the only way, you couldn't do it any longer.

The battle was too hard, it needed to end.

"Y/N, you're awake!" Vic burst into the room and broke the sudden silence before she spins and looks back towards the door. "Less! Kyra! Lotte! Laura! Y/N/N is awake!" she shouts loud enough to get the attention of the three remaining girls not in the room.

As right on queue, the rest of the girls all run in and smile widely when they see you awake and sat up in the hospital bed.

"Y/N/N, you're awake!" Laura says as she grins at you before she walks over and hugs you.

"Hi Y/N/N!" Alessia smiles brightly, glad to see you're awake.

"Y/N/N!" Kyra shouted aloud, right down the blondes' ear beside her.

"Ow, Kyra. That was right down my ear" Alessia grumbles as she glares at the Aussie girl before she shakes her head and walks over to your beside to exchange a hug with you.

"Glad that you're awake, Y/N. You gave us all a scare" Lotte came over and gave you a gentle hug before she ruffles your hair.

None of them 4 girls had caught the glum expressions on the older girls' faces.

"So how long do you think it'll be before your back on the pitch and we can prank everyone?" Kyra questions taking it upon herself to plop herself down on the end of the bed.

"Hopefully not too long" You take the chance to put a front on in front of the girls in the room. "I'll be back before you know it and thrashing you out there!" you give her a grin to hide the deep pain inside.

"How're you feelin' kid?" Lotte glances at you concerned.

"Oh you know, fabulous. Just had the best 24 hour nap" You can't help but joke with the girls even with them all looking so distraught. "Ah come on girls, cheer up. I'm not dead yet, you know?" You tell them.

"I'm sorry no I can't do this. I can't sit here and pretend that everything is okay and fine, when it's not... It's far from okay" Leah spoke up as she goes to move off the bed from where she sat beside you.

"What's going on?" Vic asks confused, having not been in the room previously.

"Y/N/N is tired of life, she wants to give up on it" Leah tells them as her bottom lip wobbles at she tells the rest of the girls what you had said.

"W... What do you mean?" Laura asks, confused and not understanding what the blonde means.

"Y/N wants to die" Leah drops the bombshell before she presses a kiss that lasts longer than usual and then starts to walk away.

"What?" Alessia gasps as her eyes widen in shock as she looks at you.

"Wait, Le... No!" You shot up as you try and latch onto her arm. "Le, don't leave me... I need you-- Please, come back!" you shout aloud as you thrash your arms around.

"I'll go and find her" Lia is quick to follow her, leaving the rest of the girls all still staring at you.

"Y/N, you need to be careful of your bandages or there'll rip" Steph says gently as she looks concerned about your well-being now while she moves to stand by your beside.

"I don't care, I don't... I don't care! Leah! Don't go, come back!" You continue to put up a fight to get out of the hospital bed. "Please, please, c... come back!" you scream at the top of your voice.

What have you done? You made her so upset.

You've made them all so upset, your a horrible person.

Why did you have to blurt it out like that? Your so stupid.

Stupid, selfish... You're nothing but a huge let down.

The voices inside your head was taunting you, you just needed them to stop.

Watching the one person that's always stuck by your side, walk away, it hurts you more that you realise.

More than any pain you currently feel, why did you go and say that?

"Calm down Y/N/N. You'll make yourself sick if your not careful" Beth tells you as she moves to stand on the other side of the bed as she pulls you into her arms for a hug as you just break down into sobs.

"I... I don't care, I don't... Leah! Come back!" Your now sobbing as you still try and do your best to get out of bed to go after the blonde, although it wasn't any good when you had so many different wires and monitors attached to you. "Le, please... please, don't leave me!"

Why did it hurt so much for her to walk away like that? You really were so selflish.

"Deep breaths, Y/N. Just keep on taking deep breaths" Steph adds in, trying to make it to the point where you didn't get yourself too upset that you were physically hurting yourself again.

"I'll be back" Kim eyes you wearily as she exhales a sigh before she also leaves the room to go and find the two girls.

"Leah?" Lia found Leah sat slouched down against one of the walls outside of your hospital room.

Leah peers up to look at the Swiss women, "I can't be in there right now" she mumbles quietly. " I... I just can't do it, I can't sit there and listen to crack jokes about death and be so optemistic when she... when she said something like that, I just can't" she explains to the older girl.

"I know" Lia replies in agreement and moves sit beside her.

"She said that she wants to die, Wally" Leah states as she stares straight out in front of her.

"I... I know" Lia repeats as she exhales a sigh and wraps her free arm around the blonde.

"She said she wants out of life... I... I-- Why?" Leah asks in disbelief as the tears threaten to spill.

"I don't know, Le" Lia mumbles and bits her bottom slightly.

"S...She said she wants to die, Wally" Leah voice quiviers as she repeats what they heard. "She's a teenage girl, s... she has so much more to achieve, so much more-- H... How can she be so depressed about life that she would rather be dead instead?" she questions distraught.

"She's suffering Le" Lia swallows the lump that forms in her throat as she hugs the blonde in her arms. "She's been suffering for a long time and we just didn't know, but we can help now" she tries to speak positive about it all.

"I... I thought she was doing better, she... she was doing better. I don't get it, what happened that made her do this?" Leah wonders numbly as she roughly wipes the tears away and shakes her head. "We can't let her die, we can't let her give up just so easily. She needs to fight... She has to fight!" she adds in.

"We will help her, we won't let her suffer in silence anymore" Kim speaks up as she joins the two of them as she exhales a shaky breath. "Y/N is one of our own, we'll be there for her and she'll get better" she tells them honestly.

"But how can we do that when she doesn't even want the help?" Leah questions as she shakes her head in disagreement. "You heard her in there, Kim! You heard what she said, she doesn't want to live anymore, she did what she did on purpose. H... How can we help her?" she questions as her voice breaks even more.

"We need to make a plan, we can come up with a way to help her... Even if she doesn't want the help" Kim declares with determination in her voice.

"But how do we do that? We can't keep an eye on her 24/7, when we have training and stuff, can we?" Lia glances at the Scots' woman in confusion.

"We keep her in hospital where she'll be safe" Kim tells the two of them.

"And how do we do that? I imagine as soon as she gets the chance then she'll bolt out of here" Leah scoffs and shakes her head, knowing you all too well and you were stubborn when it come to some things.

"We don't let her have the chance to do that then, still is still a minor remember? Technically that means, that you, Leah, since you're her guardian so too speak, you can make that decision for her and notify the doctors of your concern for her own welfare" Kim explains to the blonde, which was somewhat true now since you had moved in with her.

"Keeping her here against her own will? She'd hate me then for sure" Leah mutters as she rubs her hands down her face, feeling the stress of everything even more when the decision was resting on her shoulders.

"She might do at first, but soon enough she'll realise that you're only doing this to help her because you love her just like we all do" Kim gives the blonde a sympathetic smile.

"Kim is right Leah, this will be the best thing for Y/N" Lia speaks up after she had been quiet for a bit.

Leah glances between the two girls that she is sat with. "Is it, really?" she asks, still unsure about it all.

"You know it is Le" Lia states, knowingly.

Okay, maybe Kim has a point there then.

This would be the best decision to make right now.

"Alright, but how do we get here to stay here?" Leah asks, not knowing how to even go about this.

"First things first, we-- you speak to the doctors, you tell them that she cut herself and has admitted that she intended to do it. That's validation for the doctors to detain her for up to 72 hours at least" Kim explains the logical side of it all.

"That is something that I don't think she will like very much" Lia frowns, shaking her head as she listens to the older women.

Leah frowns and shakes her head. "A psych hold? I don't think she'll like that very much" The Swiss women tells her captain

"No, she won't but she won't have much choice if the doctors believe she's at risk of hurting herself again" Kim confesses to them as she exhales a deep sigh. "The doctors will run further assessment to determine whether they need to keep her in for longer and in the mean time, it gives us chance to talk to Jonas and the medical staff, fill them in what's happened and create a proper plan going forward" she adds in.

"And what if you determine that she needs to stay for longer than 72 hours?" Lia questions the Scots' woman.

"Then we cross that bridge when we come to it" Kim replies to the blonde as she moves to crouch down beside her.

"I know that it'll hurt to walk away and leave her here in the hospital Le, but you know as well that this is the right way, it's the only way for her to get better" Lia says honestly.

"Remember that Y/N is our family and we will always be there for her even if she will be mad at us about this" Kim adds in.

"Oh yeah, she is definitely going to be super mad about this" Leah chuckles in realisation about it.

Sure enough you would probably be mad with her, but Leah wasn't going to let you try and kill yourself again, not on her watch.

You were her family even if you were a complete pain is the ass sometimes, but you were her pain in the ass to deal with.

#arsenal x reader #woso x reader #arsenal women x reader #leah williamson #woso #woso imagine #woso fanfics #leah williamson x teen!reader #heavy angst #arsenal x teen!reader #woso one shot #leah williamson x reader #arsenal wfc x reader

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thebiggerbear · 2 months ago

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FANFICTION FRIDAYS

This week I moved the # from 38 to 40.

Here are my picks for Dec 20th 2024, please go give them a read:

Against the Wind by @zepskies - You wake up in a strange alpha’s cabin in the middle of a snowstorm, all with a busted ankle. He holds shadows in his eyes, even though his hands are gentle. There are iron shutters around his heart, even though he saved you. You might just save him in return. (Alpha!Dean Winchester x Omega!Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: did Christmas come early in the form of this story? Hell yes, it did. Not to coincide with the theme but Alpha!Dean? I will bite, I will scratch, I will...lick...okay, this just got weird, so sorry, I'm putting myself back in my corner now, all good]

Hey Buddy by @luci-in-trenchcoats - Request: Dean x reader, where reader ran off not knowing she was pregnant, and Sam brings her back with their 2 year old. Dean should be mad, but really he’s just glad she’s back (Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: omg I don't think you realize just how much this just melts me, like the Dorothy and the Wicked Witch can't compete. Chocolate and high heat have nothing on me.]

Shadow and Sin by @blackleatherjacketz - Having just recently moved to New Orleans, you get intimately acquainted with both Mikaelson brothers, but don't find out who they truly are until it's too late. (Elijah Mikaelson x Reader, Klaus Mikaelson x Reader, The Originals) [personal note: Both Mikaleson brothers? Where's the front of the line, people???]

Twinkling Tree Dreams by @winchestergirl2 - Trying to spread some christmas cheer doesn’t go quite how you planned, but maybe it will turn out even better than you hoped. (Alec McDowell x Reader, Dark Angel) [personal note: Girl, where is my Alec from your writings of him under my tree??? No bow required. I'm waiting...]

Shout by @blackleatherjacketz - You’ve been with Shane since he left Rick’s group in Season 2, and you need to seek shelter from the rain. (Shane Walsh, The Walking Dead) [personal note: okay, I'm gonna need Shane now, too. Hand him over.]

Forgiven by @darsynia - Since dropping out of school to care for your sister, your daydream has been that a rich, handsome man will save you from drowning in debt. Until then (read: never), you’ll work hard at your new receptionist job and try not to ogle the impossibly hot construction guy working in the foyer… (Steve Rogers x Female!Reader, MCU) [personal note: hot CEO! Steve Rogers and workplace romance vibes? Sign me up!]

Terms and Conditions by @that-sarcastic-writer - when your sister's fiance goes missing, you call Colter for help, and he brings along his rugged, but handsome and charming older brother, Russell. (Russell Shaw x Doctor Female!Reader, Tracker) [personal note: Good God, I need me some Russell]

You can either lead, follow, or get out of the way by @bullet-prooflove (Young!John Dutton x Reader, Yellowstone) [personal note: I've always had a love and hate relationship with John but this started an itch for him I didn't even know I had...no, not that kind of itch...maybe...]

Good Morning by @justrainandcoffee - It's 2012 when Hannah received a call from an important executive to work with them. She's a great musician only until that moment she didn't have the chance to really show her natural talent. The BBC offered her the opportunity to finally do it and at the same time the opportunity to meet him. || Three years later, everything is very different. Two different realities linked by the same phrase: “good morning.” (Tom Hardy x Female!OC, RPF) [personal note: I was so very excited to see a fic for him!!!]

Muddy Waters by @waynes-multiverse - After a mud run and several drinks, Jensen finally gathers his courage and makes a move on a longtime friend he’s been crushing on for a while. Are his feelings reciprocated, though? (Jensen Ackles x Musician!Reader, RPF) [personal note: Mud Run!Jensen and best friends to lovers combined? I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!]

Love To Hate You by @deanwanddamons - Y/N and Soldier Boy hate each other, but can’t resist one another when they meet again after many years apart. (Soldier Boy x Supe Female!Reader, The Boys) [personal note: Holy fu-- excuse me, I need an ice cold shower, like right now, dayum...]

Let It Snow by @wayward-dreamer - As snow begins to fall, Dean and Y/N some much needed cuddling time in the perfect ambience they’ve created for themselves. (Dean Winchester x Female!Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: OMG LOVE LOVE LOVE this!!!]

Presents & Gingerbread by @lila-lou - Ben has little interest in the season’s traditions but keeps up with the wrapping and decorations just to see you happy. Still, it didn’t take long for him to draw your attention away from the preparations, making it clear that you’re the only thing he cares about. (Soldier Boy x Reader, The Boys) [personal note: oh yeah, this hits the spot...something Ben is probably also saying at this very moment if not soon enough no doubt ;)]

Merry Christmas Sweetheart by @jawritter - Time doesn’t heal all wounds, sometimes it just drives them into our bones and festers there, until forgiveness is a four letter word, and it’s to late for second chances. (Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: this tore my heart out of my chest and stomped on it so good...don't kink shame me]

Hurt So Good by @nightxcreature - After the reader makes a comment about missing Dean’s leather jacket and the old days, he takes matters into his own hands and takes her on the hunt of her life. (Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: (cries) where is my Dean doing this for me? (stomps foot extremely dramatically and then remembers my age and goes back to my corner of shame)]

Something serious by @jessjad - Beau and Y/N spend a summer evening together. But do they both expect the same thing? (Beau Arlen x Reader, Big Sky) [personal note: they better...if not I can take one for the team...or two....or three...or -- stopping right there before this gets any worse]

The One That Got Away by @justwhisperingfantasies - You thought you had left Supernatural and Jensen in the past, but almost 6 years later you get roped back in when your job is on the line. (Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: not going to lie you can't put Jensen and the word "roped" in the same sentence, you just can't do it, not with me]

I Got You by @janicho88 - When you have finally reached a breaking point, you call the one person you trust for help. He’s never seen you as more than a friend, but he is the person you know you’re safest with. It’s been months since he has had so much as a text from you, but Jake Seresin would do anything for the Navy princess he met years ago. The pilot knows she means more to him than he ever will to her, but he will do anything for her (Jake Seresin x Reader, Top Gun Franchise) [personal note: oh my gawd, just give him to me now, GIVE HIM TO ME]

Meet Cute by @lamentationsofalonelypotato - Reader is surviving in the apocalypse alone, until she meets a stranger who needs her help, even if he doesn't want to admit it. This is a reimagining of when Daryl gets hurt trying to find Sophia in Season 2, in which the reader shoots Daryl instead of Andrea. This can be read as stand alone, but can also be read as a prequel fic to "Your Fault," describing how reader and Daryl met for the first time. (Daryl Dixon x Female!Reader, The Walking Dead) [personal note: I've never been one for Daryl in reader-insert fic before but this definitely is changing my mind!]

Losing You by @thesilmarillionblog - Everything was good as a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's secret girlfriend until the team and your relationship with him began to fall apart due to a new member and her developing relationship with Ben right in front of your eyes. (Soldier Boy x Reader, The Boys) [personal note: any SB fic that starts with this line: '“Get lost fuckface and bring me a coffee,”' certainly has my attention]

forgtten birthday by @chevroletdean - Alec is new to the concept of birthdays, considering he doesn’t even really have one himself. When his s/o is sulky all day, he’s confused, until their friends throw them a surprise party and he realizes he’s messed up big time. (Alec McDowell x GN!Reader, Dark Angel) [personal note: OMG I love my boy Alec so much]

The Chocolate Chip Kind by @beyourownanchor6 - Eddie just wants to sleep, Buck can't let him, not until after midnight. (Buddie, 911 - AO3) [personal note: you always have to have some Buddie goodness and that's precisely what this is!]

Starry Night by @romancingromanoff (Natasha Romanoff x Reader, MCU) [personal note: perfection for this character (happy sigh)]

Princess Treatment by @storiesofsvu (Terry Bruno x Reader x Joe Velasco, Law & Order: SVU) [personal note: I'm still power washing the floor in the spot where I completely melted, holy Christmas, give me these two in a hotel room any day]

Forever Yours by @justagirlinafandomworld - Song Prompt from Unclaimed Love Songs: Faithfully by Journey (Bradley Bradshaw x Female!Reader) [personal note: YES, YES, YES!!!]

In Every Realm by @caplanbuckybarnes - he vows to love you in every universe (Sub-Zero x Reader, Mortal Kombat) [personal note: the young girl in me literally squealed and my heart grew about three sizes seeing this, he was always one of my faves!]

A Sudden Spark by @gloomwitchwrites - Request: The reader is Aragorn's older sister. A ranger and a renowned warrior. After Eomer personally meets the owner of the stories he's been hearing for years, he may begin to fall in love with her. (Eomer x Female!Reader, Lord of the Rings) [personal note: my first Eomer x Reader fic and it did not disappoint!]

Untitled by @catierambles (Captain Syverson x Reader, Sand Castle) [personal note: the fic for this character that I didn't know I needed!]

Request by @imyourbratzdoll - you and the chief get freaky in his car (Charlie Swan x Female!Reader, Twilight) [personal note: (raises hand) What does one have to do to be arrested by Chief Swan exactly? ...Asking for a friend]

The Storm Outside by @bullet-prooflove - Larry comforts you during a stormy night (Captain Larry James x Reader, Walker) [personal note: Storm ambience? Check. One hot ass man that I can also call Captain for fun if I want to? Check. Comforting me in my time of need? Check. Am I torn between wanting to melt into goo and using a squirt bottle on myself to stop fantasizing about him? Check. Check. Am I probably going to have to go with the latter option? Triple check.]

Waiting for the Real Thing by @rizlowwritessortof - You can’t serve in the same unit with somebody without getting pretty close. She managed to survive around him until a couple of years ago. And when she hears about their brother-in-arms troubles, she heads that way to help out. Of course, Russ beat her to it. And now she just can’t make herself leave without seeing him. (Russell Shaw x OC, Tracker) [personal note: you can't see it but I'm foaming at the mouth right now and as you may have expected, it's not a pretty sight]

Dancing Doll by @flamencodiva - Dancing Flamenco has always been a part of Y/N. But she never thought it would put her in the crosshairs of someone dangerous. How did her life end up with twists and turns? And can a green-eyed mechanic really help her? Or will she just put him in harm’s way? (Mechanic!Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: Flamenco and Dean??? Where is the line where I sign away my soul?]

Sinnerman by @venus-haze - You can’t even see your old life from Crockett Island, but nevertheless it weighs on your conscience like an anchor on the ocean floor. Father Paul Hill tries to pull the anchor up, only to sink your whole damn ship. (Father Paul Hill x Reader, Midnight Mass) [personal note: Girl, I am about to devour your horror/slasher masterlist...incoming!!!]

Stoking the Flame by @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior - Jenny and Beau have been ignoring the spark between them for a long time. How much longer can they continue? (Beau Arlen x Jenny Hoyt, Big Sky) [personal note: I'm not much of a Beau x Jenny fan, but this was so good and surprisingly satisfying for something within me for my two favorite characters on that show]

any way that you want me by @deanbrainrotwritings - he’s clingy and doesn’t know how else to feel close to her. even though it gets them both riled up, it’s nice while it lasts. (Boaz Priestly x Female!Reader, Ten Inch Hero) [personal note: PLEASE give me clingy!Priestly any day of the week, P L E A S E]

Because of You by @spn-bee - Dean Winchester, a 30-year-old hunter, rolled in to a college town to unwind. Reima M. Park-Gibbs, a 22-year-old college student was the lucky or unlucky encounter. They both got what they wanted, along with unexpected consequences. Dean will now have to protect her and his unborn child while convincing her she belongs to and with him. (Dean Winchester x OC, Supernatural) [personal note: (happy sigh with heart eyes and dopey smile) I just love this]

The Edge of Fate by @deanwinchesterswitch - AU. Cursed by a jealous witch, Benny and Isalie must wander through time to find their way back to each other. (Benny Lafitte x Female!OC, Supernatural) [personal note: yes, Benny!!! I also may call him Sir...on Thursdays and Saturdays and every other Wednesday...just saying...(winces) yeah, that was TMI, wasn't it?]

Home by @syrma-sensei - Ben's discovering new life affairs while expecting his first baby. (Soldier Boy x Wife!Reader, The Boys) [personal note: Ben as a dad gets me every time (more happy sighs)]

Running Away by @jensengirl83 - Sam has feelings for the reader, but what happens when he finally gets the courage to find her and tell her the truth? (Sam Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: Awww, Sam...I need more Sam in my life, I cannot even tell you]

When the Lines Blur by @pink-sparkly-witch - Y/N Y/L/N and Jeffrey Dean Morgan have been a successful porn couple for a few years. When Jeff decides it’s time for him to retire, he helps Y/N find his replacement who might become more than just a porn partner. (Jeffrey Dean Morgan x Reader, Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: okay I never quite saw myself in the adult entertainment business at any point in my life for...reasons but here....um, how does one get hired to work with either man (or both, I'm not picky) on set?]

Looking for more? Please check out my fic rec lists and writers rec lists (1, 2, 3). I do have some things to update like the Beau stories list, Alec, Russell, Jensen, Soldier Boy, Dean, etc (and I promise I will when I hopefully get more time in January) and I do have some more coming out like for Joe Velasco, Bobby Reyes, Law & Order: SVU, LOTR, etc.

In the meantime, if you'd like to peruse even more stories that are on my reading lists, please check out @biggerbearsreads and @tbbrebloglibrary (which will eventually take place of the 1st - tbbrl will be more organized by tags, etc) or you can check out @biggerbearficrecs.

So I threw a ton into this one due to the holidays coming up (and some little personal notes, sorry, sometimes I actually think I'm funny 🤷‍♀️). I hope you all enjoy the time whatever you might celebrate or if you don't, then I hope you've been able to find some of the amazing stories on this list that might keep you company and provide some comfort or give you the warm fuzzies, whatever you're in need of! I wish all of you the very best!!! ❤️❤️

And please don’t forget when you come across any and all creative content on here to:

And please always reblog! Thank you!

dividers by @saradika-graphics

#fanfiction fridays #december 20th 2024

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lottiesliterature · 26 days ago

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₊˚⊹♡American Sweetheart

Chapter One: Summer Days and Starry Nights

Summary: You are a city girl, freshly engaged dreaming of the simple life. You plan a wedding in the countryside of Texas. Your friend Tommy lends you a room in his house down there to prepare for the wedding. What he didn't tell you is that you'll have a roommate. A little blast from the past?

Warnings: 18+, mndi, swearing, bickering, cheating??, Joel Miller as a cowboy♡, idk if I'm missing anything so lmk

Lottie's note: my first series type shii. I've been on a Pedro Pascal psychosis so I thought I would write.

December 31, 2024

The energy in the air was electric, a mix of anticipation and excitement. People danced, laughed, and shouted over the booming bass of the music, their faces illuminated by the rapid flicker of neon lights. Time felt suspended as the night wore on, each passing second building toward the final countdown. The crowd's exhilaration grew, echoing the promises of a fresh start, while the mingling scents of alcohol and smoke served as a backdrop to the chaos and celebration. It was a night that would be remembered, marked by its noise, its lights, and its fleeting sense of freedom.

"Hey Y/n, didn't think you'd make it." Maria cheered. Maria was an attorney at a law firm. We were college roommates while I were studying to be an interior designer. We lived together a few years after college up until she met Tommy.

I smiled and shook my head, the familiar warmth of Maria's voice cutting through the noise. "I almost didn’t," I admitted, taking a step closer to her in the crowded room. "But, you know, New Year's Eve and all... couldn’t miss it."

She raised her glass, her eyes sparkling despite the exhaustion that was just beginning to show in the curve of her smile. "Well, I’m glad you did. It’s been too long, Y/n."

I glanced around at the sea of people, the chaotic energy of the party contrasting sharply with the calm we’d shared in our apartment back then. "I know. I mean, after you and Tommy... it’s been hard to keep up."

Maria's gaze softened for a moment, a quiet acknowledgment passing between us. "Yeah, things got... busy. But I’m glad we could catch up tonight. You deserve a night of fun, don’t you think?" She nudged me playfully, but there was an undertone of something more, a longing to reconnect, even amidst the noise and the flashing lights.

"Maybe," I said, taking a sip from the drink someone had handed me earlier. "We’ll see if I can still keep up."

She laughed, her expression a mix of amusement and something deeper, as if remembering the days when we lived together, those carefree, late-night talks after class and work. Back when life was simpler, and our biggest worries were deadlines and design concepts, not law firms or boyfriends.

"Tommy’s over there," she said, motioning toward the other side of the room, where a tall figure stood by the bar, chatting with a group of people. "Don’t worry, he won’t bite. Come on, let’s go say hi."

I nodded, trying to push past the feeling of being slightly out of place. It was nice to see Maria again, but there was a gap now, one that time had woven between us, filled with new experiences and changes I hadn’t expected. But as we walked toward Tommy, the night’s chaos swirling around us, I couldn’t help but feel a pull—a reminder of how things used to be.

"Well here I am. Where's Oscar at?" I asked. Oscar is my boyfriend of 7 months. He is a CEO of a game company, passed down from his dad. The way that we two met was strange but cute. We had ordered the same drink and ended up fighting for who's was who's. Then the other cup come out. We had a laugh and we started talking from then.

Maria chuckled, her gaze sweeping the room. "Oscar’s probably somewhere in the middle of all this chaos, knowing him. He can’t resist talking shop even at a party. He’s over there," she said, pointing toward the far corner where a group of people stood, laughing and holding glasses.

I squinted, trying to spot him in the crowd. There he was, standing a bit taller than the rest, his relaxed posture giving him away even from a distance. The way people gravitated toward him was no surprise—he had that charisma, a kind of magnetic presence that drew you in without trying.

"Thanks," I said, already moving toward him, a small smile tugging at my lips. I couldn’t help but think back to that night when we’d first met. It had been so ridiculous, but in the best way possible. We were both so determined to claim that drink, neither of us backing down until the bartender handed over another. And after that? A conversation sparked, easy and effortless, just like the kind of connection I’d always hoped for but never quite found—until then.

As I walked through the crowd toward Oscar, I could already feel the familiar flutter of excitement in my chest. It wasn’t just the party or the night ahead; it was him.

"Hi baby, I knew it was you. Come on hurry." He drags me to the terrace. The clock is at 30 seconds.

"I know that we haven't been dating for long but you are all I ever wanted. I love you for so many reasons that I don't know where to start." Oscar gets on one knee. "So will you let this ring make our love official and will you marry me?" He pulls out a big diamond ring, something you never thought you'd see.

I stare at him in shock. He looks at me, waiting for a response.

My mouth is open but the words won't come out

I smile widely. This is the man i'm going to live for the rest of my life

I grab his arms in excitement

"Yes!" I yelled. I jump in arms pressing my lips against his. In that moment, the world around us seemed to vanish. The flashing lights, the clinking glasses, and the distant countdown became a blur as I felt Oscar’s arms catch me. Time stood still, and everything was suddenly so vivid, so real. The explosion of fireworks in the sky reflected in his eyes, and I could barely catch my breath as joy and disbelief swirled within me. Tears ran down my cheeks, a mixture of overwhelming happiness and relief, as if I had finally found my place in the universe.

Oscar’s lips met mine, soft and tender, grounding me in the moment. The crowd’s cheers erupted in the background, signaling the arrival of a new year, but in that second, I felt like everything had already changed. My heart, which had once been weighed down by doubt and fear, felt light. This was the kind of love I had never dared to imagine.

He gently lowered me back to the ground, his hands steadying me as I caught my breath. With a smile that spoke volumes, he slipped the ring onto my finger—its weight, its significance, something that felt both surreal and comforting. The symbol of everything we had built together in such a short time.

I didn’t think I’d be happy again

July 4th 2023

The air is thick with the scent of hay and fresh earth as they stand on the edge of the old dirt road, the crickets chirping loudly in the background. The farmhouse looms behind them, the place they once spent so many nights talking, laughing, and dreaming. But tonight, the warmth is gone. The sun is setting, casting long shadows over the fields, and there’s a chill in the air, both physical and emotional. I pack up my things, shoving my items angrily in my suitcase.

“Wait, sweetheart, don’t,” Joel begged, his voice low and desperate. He reached out and grabbed my suitcase, pulling it away from me before I could zip it closed. The urgency in his movements only made the anger inside me burn hotter.

“Joel, don’t,” I hissed, trying to pull the suitcase back, but his grip was strong. “You can’t decide what you want, and it’s driving me crazy. I can’t keep doing this. I won’t.”

He froze for a second, his eyes flicking from my face to the suitcase, his jaw tightening as if he were trying to hold back the words he knew would only make things worse. But then they came anyway.

“So you think getting out of here, away from me, is the best idea?” Joel snapped, his voice rising. He placed his hands on his hips, giving me a look that was a mix of frustration and confusion. “Is that really what you want? To just walk away from me, from us, without even trying to fix this?”

I felt my stomach tighten, a sick twist of pain mixing with the anger boiling inside me. He didn’t get it. He was still acting like he could just explain this away, like if he said the right thing, I’d come back and everything would be fine. But it wasn’t fine. It hadn’t been fine for months.

“Yes,” I bit out, my voice firm despite the rawness in my chest. “Because I can’t have you stringing me along like this anymore. I’m tired of waiting for you to figure it out, Joel. I’m not your backup plan. You make me feel like I’m always waiting for you to choose me, but you never do. You keep me at arm’s length like I’m not good enough, like I’m just some option when it’s convenient for you. I deserve more than that. I need more than that.”

Joel took a step forward, frustration clearly evident in his posture, his brows furrowed as he processed what I was saying. “So what, you think just leaving is going to make everything better?” He took another step closer, his voice rising with each word. “Do you really think running away is the answer? You think it’s all that easy?”

I stepped back, the sting of his words cutting deeper than I wanted to admit. “I’m not running, Joel,” I shot back, my heart hammering in my chest. “I’m walking away from someone who can’t make up their mind about me. And I’m done pretending that it’s okay.”

His eyes flashed with something close to anger now. “You don’t think I care? You think I don’t want this to work? You think I want to lose you?” He ran a hand through his hair, pacing now, frustration seeping into his every movement. “I don’t know how to fix this, okay? I’m trying, but you make it so damn hard! I don’t even know what you want from me anymore! Every time I think I’m doing the right thing, it’s never enough!”

I could feel my chest tightening, tears welling up in my eyes as I listened to his words. But as much as it hurt to hear him say that, I knew this was it. The same pattern, the same endless cycle of him feeling lost and me feeling neglected. I was done being the one who always had to take the fall, the one who kept making excuses for him.

“No,” I said, my voice quieter but with all the conviction I could muster. “You don’t get to keep blaming me, Joel. You don’t get to put this all on me. You’ve had every opportunity to show me you wanted this, to show me I mattered, and you didn’t. Every time I needed you to show up for me, you didn’t. I’m not asking for perfection, I’m asking for honesty.”

His face softened for a moment, and I saw a flash of the man I once knew—the man I thought I could trust. But that look only made it worse. Because the truth was, I didn’t know him anymore. Not the way I needed to.

“You think I don’t care about you?” His voice was quieter now, a mix of hurt and confusion. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to make this work, how to get my shit together. I’ve been trying to figure out how to be the person you deserve. I just—” He broke off, shaking his head, frustration evident in his movements. “I’m not perfect, okay? I don’t have it all figured out. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want you.”

“Then show me,” I said, my voice breaking. “I’m done waiting for you to figure it out. I’ve given you all of me, and I can’t keep doing it. I can’t keep pretending like I’m not the one always putting in the effort, always waiting for the day when you finally wake up and realize you want this as much as I do. But it’s never going to happen.”

He took a step toward me, his face a mixture of desperation and sorrow. “Please don’t leave. I don’t want to lose you, not like this.”

I could feel the pull inside me, that part of me that still cared so deeply for him, the part that just wanted to run into his arms and forget everything that had gone wrong. But I knew better now. I had to be strong for myself. For my own sanity.

“Goodbye, Joel,” I said, my voice shaking, but I didn’t let myself falter. “I hope you figure it out someday, but I can’t be the one you lean on anymore. Not like this.”

I turned away, the finality of the words sinking in. I could hear him calling my name behind me, but I didn’t stop. I couldn’t. Not this time.

As I stepped outside into the cool night air, I could still hear the fireworks going off in the distance, but now they seemed distant, like a world away. And as much as it hurt, I knew I was finally letting go.

⊹♡Well damn that's the first chapter. I hope this does well. This is just a small introduction to some characters. I'm going to try and pick this up and shii. But thank you for reading and I hope you stay tuned.

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randxmthxughts · 2 years ago

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Unrequited Love - Tsu'tey x Omatikaya!Reader

summary: you had been in love with tsu'tey for as long as you could remember. so when you see his heart break again at the loss of another mate, you offer him comfort, expecting nothing in return

genre/warnings: smut!, oral (m receiving), angst, unrequited love

wc: 2k

a/n: this is my first time writing smut, so i hope i didn't screw it up completely. please let me know if there's anything unrealistic or sounds silly (i am a virgin, idk what the hell i'm doing), i'll be glad to change it. also, please don't forget to leave some feedback, replies, whatever you want. i love reading what you have to say, and it always encourages me to write more ♡

masterlist - part 2

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You watch in silence, your focus only on him. As things escalate between Tsu'tey and Jake, people around you begin to gasp and murmur, filling the space with noise. All you want to do is to call out his name, get him out of there.

It’s obvious to you that his challenge means nothing. He does it to upkeep his reputation, but if he kills Jake, Neytiri will never choose him again. Tsu’tey draws a knife, bending down over Jake’s unconscious body.

“Neytiri was promised to me,” Tsu’tey grabs him by the hair, bringing his knife closer, “This is a demon in a false body. It should not live.”

Neytiri suddenly lunges at Tsu’tey with all her might. She knocks him off his feet and takes a defensive stance over Jake, baring her teeth and knife. You notice Tsu’tey's posture weaken, as he watches his mate claim Jake as her own in front of the whole clan. He knows it’s too late for him to fight, Neytiri and Jake are now mated for life. Your heart aches at the sight of Tsu’tey's bloodied face and the way he spits on the ground before retreating into the forest, disappearing from the crowd.

Desperately, you rush after him, ignoring the noise and commotion breaking around you. It takes some time for you to finally spot his frame, partially hidden between thick bushes, sitting on a rock with his head hanging low in defeat.

Sylwanin was his first true love. You watched them fall in love while you were still children. Having a crush on somebody who was already claimed was tough on you, but you knew that Sylwanin and Tsu’tey were meant for each other, and you tried very hard to be happy for them. You remember it as clear as a day when they announced their bond, and the way you cheered for them, joining in on the celebration. But in your heart, you couldn't help but wish for the kind of love that Tsu'tey had for Sylwanin. You prayed to Eywa that she would one day grant you such feeling.

Losing Sylwanin in that tragic accident was devastating already, but being arranged to mate with her sister instead must have been an unbearable burden for Tsu’tey. Your heart shattered into thousands of tiny pieces when you first heard the news, and there was nothing you could do to help. Tsu’tey was a great hunter and warrior, there was no one more deserving of being Olo’eyctan than him. And though he bonded with Neytiri over their shared grief, he knew that he could never love her the same way. When Sylwanin died, a part of him had also died with her. And now, witnessing Tsu’tey lose his mate to another man was agonizing.

“Tsu’tey,” you catch his attention, approaching him.

As if caught in a moment of vulnerability, Tsu’tey sits up straight. You grimace at the blood smeared around his beautiful face, eyes glistening with the threat of tears. Noticing your gaze lingering on him, Tsu’tey hurries to wipe his eyes. Future Olo’eyctan or not, he didn’t like that you saw him like this. Quickly, you reach forward and grasp his wrists, preventing him from hiding his face.

“‘M sorry,” you mumble.

“I’m fine,” he huffs, shaking his hands to free them from yours.

You don’t take offense to his harshness. Growing up, Tsu’tey always had a soft spot for you, but that did not apply during the moments of humiliation. You crouch down in front of him, letting his frame loom over you.

“You shouldn’t have followed me, Y/N,” he says, like it was an order you disobeyed.

You purse your lips, uncertain if Tsu’tey truly means it. Despite being only two years older than you, Tsu’tey still treated you like a child sometimes. Even as a kid, he exuded dominance and strength, his presence alone putting everyone intact. So whenever he saw boys bullying you, Tsu’tey was quick to tell them off. He would then nudge your shoulder, coaxing a smile from you, and consider his job done. But what he failed to recognize, after all these years, is that you never saw him the same way he saw you. Your heart ached every time you looked at him, knowing that he could never be yours, and that his own heart belonged to someone else.

“I don’t want to take out my anger on you,” Tsu’tey’s tone is stern, “You better leave, Y/N.”

“You can take it out on me, I don’t mind,” you say softly, as his eyes widen in confusion.

“I’m not kidding,” he warns you with a low growl.

“Please, let me help you,” you plead with him, resting your palms over his thighs, “I can take it, you don’t have to hold back.”

Tsu’tey rarely heard those words. He was always scolded for being short-tempered, acting out of anger. That those were unsuitable qualities for the future Olo’eyctan. Tsu’tey tried to contain it, but often old habits would slip right back in. He shifted under your touch, gazing at your hands, while his mind went to places where it shouldn’t go. He thought that he was probably reading you wrong, still upset over the fight.

You weren’t sure if this was where you wanted things to head, when you followed him. But right at this moment, you felt like there was nothing else you wanted to do for him. Your heart truly desired to see him relax for a moment, even if it was at the expense of your feelings. As you slowly moved your palms higher on his thighs, Tsu’tey drew in a short breath. He watched you silently until your fingers grazed the edges of his loincloth.

“You don’t have to,” Tsu’tey put his hands over yours, in an attempt to stop you, but all you could feel was the heat radiating off his skin, making your heart race.

“I want to,” you insist, “Let me make you feel good.”

“You know I can never truly devote myself to anyone else but Sylwanin,” his voice drops, and you have to perk your ears to hear him.

“I know,” you move your fingers to his sides, reaching the ties of his loincloth, “I don’t expect anything in return.”

“Y/N…” Tsu’tey whispers but you shush him.

You notice the way he tries to resist the growing lust, despite longing for it to be satisfied. His mind tells him to walk away but his body doesn’t comply. Would it be so bad for him to get lost in the moment and just let it go? Let himself forget about all of his worries and pretend that he had nothing weighing down on him?

You hesitate before untying his loincloth, waiting for Tsu’tey to stop you, but he doesn’t. As the fabric slides off his sides, revealing his already hard cock, you’re taken aback slightly. Tsu’tey watches your reaction with a hint of shame; he can’t believe he’s already aroused just by the way you undressed him.

Slowly, you lean in, pressing a soft kiss to his thigh. You hear Tsu’tey’s breath hitch and feel his muscles clench, as you start trailing kisses up his skin. When you reach his balls, you pause. You have never done anything like this before. Sure, you heard girls talk about pleasuring their mates in many ways, but you could only dream about making Tsu’tey happy. It’s scary.

You take a breath before planting wet kisses to his sack, then some more to the base of his member. Instinctively, his penis twitches underneath your lips, and you hear Tsu’tey let out a small moan. Your ears perk up at the sound so pleasant, you wish you could hear it everyday. You’ve never seen this side of Tsu’tey; he was always so stern, so aware of the way he presented himself to others. But here he is now, trembling under your touch, letting his guard down. Feeling braver, you wrap your lips around his sack, sucking in gently. Simultaneously, your fingers find their way around his penis, giving it a light squeeze.

“Tsahey,” he grunts through his teeth.

The sounds he makes are so satisfying, you feel heat rush to your cunt. You try to ignore the growing sensation, as you press your tongue flat against his shaft, and follow along a prominent vein. Tsu’tey’s grabs the back of your neck, bringing your face closer, ordering for more. You had no idea that you were unintentionally teasing him, making him impatient.

Getting his hint, you take the tip of his penis into your mouth, your tongue occasionally grazing the top, as you suck on it. You let the saliva drip out of your mouth and smear it over his shaft with your hand, beginning to draw small motions up and down, your mouth still working.

“Take it all in,” Tsu’tey grunts, “Please.”

Tsu’tey had never sounded as desperate as he did right now. To please him, you lean in, trying to take his whole penis into your mouth. It was your best attempt, given how big he was, and feeling the tip press against the back of your throat. It tickles your skin like an annoying scratch you want to tend to. As you lose the rhythm of your breathing, suddenly feeling overwhelmed, you pull away. Instead, you work your hand up and down his penis, now completely covered in your saliva. You massage his balls with your other hand, and when you hear Tsu’tey draw in another short breath, your walls painfully clench around nothing. You push your thighs together, trying not to get distracted by your own desire.

As you pick up a rhythm with your hand, Tsu’tey’s muscles are clenching and relaxing at every movement. He starts to grow impatient, wishing to feel the inside of your mouth again, and reaches out to direct his penis into your mouth. You take him in.

“Tsahey,” he grunts again, then lets out a soft moan when you swirl your tongue around him.

Tsu’tey suddenly stands up, forcing you to sit up higher on your knees. This new position now allows him to slide his full length into you, tickling your throat and almost making you gag. Tears prick up at the corner of your eyes, as he starts jerking his hips forward in small, quick motions. To hold you in place, Tsu’tey grabs you by your hair, and starts speeding up, thrusting into you more violently. When he tugs at your queue, you let out a small whimper.

Distracted by the sound you just made, Tsu’tey slows down, locking his eyes on yours.

“Will you be alright?” he asks, his breath shaky. You suck on him as a sign of approval, “I just need a moment, I'm almost there."

Tsu’tey grips the back of your neck, and picks up the speed of his thrusts again, hitting the back of your throat with a new force. He is going harder on you, desperately chasing the wave of pleasure. Your mouth felt so warm, so soft around him, cheeks sucking and pressing against his length. The tears in your eyes turn your vision blurry, and you try to blink them away, to watch his face. He looks so beautiful.

Suddenly, you feel his member clench, and Tsu’tey pushes into you a few more times. His movements become sloppier, and when a loud groan escapes from his lips, you feel warm bitter liquid filling out your mouth.

“Mawey,” he whispers, his lids heavy, as he pulls out.

He presses his fingers against your chin, lifting your head just enough to encourage you to swallow. You gulp down, maintaining eye contact, and Tsu’tey hums with a smile, satisfied. Your cunt clenches painfully, pleading for attention, and you squeeze your thighs again, trying to calm yourself down.

Tsu’tey notices it immediately, eyes now lingering on your loincloth. You look away, embarrassed to get caught by him, and wipe your mouth.

“Thank you, Y/N,” he says, still standing bare in front of you.

It’s awkward, you don’t know how to behave now. You stand up, still not meeting his eyes.

“Feel a little better now?” you ask softly.

“Much better,” Tsu’tey places his fingers under your chin, forcing you to meet his eyes, “Do you want me to help you with that?”

Your cunt clenches again, when his gaze trails down your body. You feel heat rush to your face at the mere thought of Tsu'tey pleasuring you. But you’re too flustered, you’re not sure you can endure it.

“No, this is not about me,” you shake your head, “I wanted to make you feel better because you didn’t deserve what happened.”

“I must be a fool,” Tsu’tey admits with a guilty sigh, “I never thought that you... that there was something.”

“I know you hadn’t,” you dismiss the way his eyes burn into yours.

“You deserve someone better. Who is not as broken as me,” his hand cups your cheek to offer you comfort.

“Please don’t,” you pull away, interrupting him before he can pity you, “I know you don’t feel the same, Tsu’tey, it’s alright.”

You force a small smile, blinking away the tears in your eyes. The moment between you is fleeting, but it weighs heavy on your heart. You know that he can never love you.

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part 2

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bookshelf-in-progress · 4 months ago

Text

From the Other Side of the End of the World

A time travel story for @inklings-challenge.

Thanks to @awesomebutunpractical, @thatscarletflycatcher, and @rogerhamleys for beta help that made it possible to finish this.

I. Josephine Forester to Rachel Forester

Agril 19, 551 T.E.

Grimsfell, North Arza

Dear Rachel,

At last! The war is over! I know my history as well as anybody, but it still took me by surprise. I sobbed with relief when news of the treaty came. We haven’t heard any shelling for three days. No more wounded have arrived. It seems like a miracle.

But the work is far from done. Grimsby Hall is still filled with wounded soldiers, and we hard-working nurses are kept busy from morning til night. It will be weeks before some of these boys are well enough to travel, and years until they are completely healed, if they ever are at all.

The suffering I’ve seen! There is little even modern medical knowledge can do to ease their pain. Their war machines are primitive—cannons, tanks, machine guns—but they've wrought destruction on the land unlike anything we could imagine in our time. If I hadn’t seen our future, I’m not sure I could believe this land could be healed, that the world could ever find peace. But I have seen it, and the hope it inspires is the greatest gift I can give to these people.

Now, more than ever, I know that I've been called here. My research will be invaluable to history, but more than that, I feel a connection to these people, this place, this time. This is where I'm meant to serve.

I have a connection to you, too, of course. Your letters always make me feel I'm right there with you. Write back soon. I want to know about everything.

Love,

Josephine

P.S. I’ve shared a couple of the stories you wrote me with some of my patients. I hope you don’t mind—they need cheering up, and there's nothing in your stories that requires knowledge of the future. They very much enjoy them.

II. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Agril 32, 771 T.E

Variby University

Dear Josie,

I know it’s taken me ages to write back, but the life of a college girl is a whirlwind. I made a list of all the things I’ve done this week, so you can see that I barely had time to breathe.

Two papers, three exams, and a presentation about the life cycle of the Aribanian tree frog.

Airball playoffs and championship. (I scored twenty-eight points!)

Trip to Grimsby. Twelve of us in one car. Visited the war museum. No pictures of you. Try to pose for any cameras if you see them.

Climbed the bell tower after Ferdie dared me to. Am now the hero of the school.

It sounds terribly shallow compared to what you're going through, but if I didn’t do all these things, where would I get the charming anecdotes that fill my letters and raise your poor, war-weary spirits? Even though the war is over, it still sounds dreadful. I don’t know how you manage it. At least you'll be home soon—it's a little over a month, right?

If I ever had hopes of becoming a time traveler, your letters would burn that dream right out of me. I'm perfectly happy in the safe and cozy modern day. I'll stay here in comfort and leave the do-gooding to you.

I’m glad you could make some use out of my stories. I’ve half a mind to tell that worthless university magazine editor that they’ve proven to be truly timeless. I’ll send another one along with this letter. Let your soldiers read it to their hearts’ content.

I could tell you loads more, but I’ve got play practice in an hour. I’ve been cast as Elsie in Less Boring, and I’ve got to learn my lines. (I've been laughing my head off. Darrin Royston is a genius).

I promise I’ll write more promptly next time.

Your sister,

Rachel

III. Josephine Forester to Rachel Forester

Maj 3, 551 T.E.

Grimsfell, North Arza

Dear Rachel,

It's always good to know things are going well for you. You're right—my term is over in less than a month. I had almost forgotten. It seems impossible. There's so much I still have to do.

I don't have time to give a proper response, except to tell you that I gave your story to the most voracious reader among my patients, and he's already finished it. It's exactly the type of story that he likes best, so he's asked to write a note of appreciation to the authoress. I’ve allowed it—my letter-link isn’t all that different to the ones they have in this time period. Maybe this will make up for the magazine’s lack of appreciation for your work.

Your sister,

Josephine

IV. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Maj 3, 551 T.E.

Miss Rachel Forrester,

Your sister Josephine has informed me that you are the authoress of a little tale that has brought light and joy to my sickbed. Your comic fantasy is one of the most enjoyable works of fiction I have read in recent memory. It isn’t often one finds just such a blend of the beautiful and the silly. Too often, the comic fairy tales neglect their world, while the more grounded fantasy works take themselves too seriously. Yours struck just the right note.

There's little enough cheer in the world these days, and I'm glad to find that someone still remembers its secret. I pray—if it's not too presumptuous—that you have many more such works for your sister to pass on for our amusement.

Gratefully,

Darrin Royston

V. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forrester

Maj 3, 701 T.E.

Josephine!

You let Darrin Royston read my stupid little stories?

“They’re just the kind of thing he likes to read,” she says.

Because they’re based on the kind of thing he writes! Or did write. Or will write.

How old is he?

Have we broken history?

What if, having read my stories, he doesn’t write one of his great works? How would I know if he didn’t write it? Maybe you’ve already erased a dozen masterpieces from history, and I’ll never know they were never written!

Couldn’t you have given me some kind of warning before showing my fiction to one of the great literary minds of the post-war era? I want to curl up and die at the thought of his eyes looking at my inane scribbles. I might have done it already if his letter hadn’t suggested that he, for some reason, enjoyed it.

Maybe the war shattered his sanity. Maybe he has some kind of infection. You should check.

Rachel

VI. Josephine Forester to Rachel Forester

Maj 5, 551 T.E.

Grimsfell, North Arza

Rachel,

Who is Darrin Royston? You’re the one who knows about authors. To me, Darrin Royston is a dark-haired, undersized private recovering from a broken leg, who has every right to read your stories if he wants to.

You don’t have to worry about changing history. I’ve told you before—it can’t be done. History is chronological—everything that happens as a result of time travel has always happened that way. I’m here because I was always meant to be here.

It’s possible your story inspired whatever it is that Royston wrote, but it won’t erase anything.

His words were genuine. He really did enjoy your story. Take it as a compliment. It sounds like a good one.

And maybe send another story? The boy’s going stir-crazy and he’s driving me up the wall.

Yours,

Josephine

VII. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 6, 701 T.E.

Josephine,

Who is Darrin Royston?

Time travel is wasted on you.

He's only one of the most brilliant writers of the last century! Poems, plays, essays, novels—you name it, he's written it. He has wit, wisdom, genius. He's a little bit niche, but you've lived with me. You should at least have known his name! I just told you I'm acting in one of his plays!

There are a million things I'd love to ask him about, but he probably hasn't done any of them yet.

What does he look like? What's he like? I need details!

Yours,

Rachel

P.S. I've sent along a nice, long story. I hope it won't destroy his opinion of my literary talents.

VIII. Josephine Forester to Rachel Forester

Maj 8, 551 T.E.

Dear Rachel,

That Darrin Royston? Now that you mention it, the name sounds familiar. You have to admit this whole situation is mildly hilarious. I never expected to accidentally introduce you to a celebrity.

I'm not sure what you want to hear about him. He's dark-haired. Slender. Not over-tall. Has a melancholy streak. Rather too quiet—except when he's demanding reading material. Your story is keeping him nicely pacified. I leave my letter-link next to his bed (with all the personal letters hidden, of course—though I can't say I wasn't tempted to let him read that last one).

He's not what I would have expected the author of Less Boring to be like. (I guess I have seen that play. I remember laughing.) But he's young, and this isn't exactly a cheerful setting. Broken bodies, broken minds—blood, bones and suffering, dust and dirt and smoke. Even with the shadow of the war gone, it left plenty of darkness behind.

You're going to think this is crazy, but I've written to ask the university for an extension of my time here. The people here have become my friends and allies. There is so much work to be done. I can't leave them to deal with it alone.

It's only another six months, and after all, what's time to a time traveler? I'm going to miss you, but you have plenty to keep you busy. Before you know it, we'll be back together again.

I hope you understand. Pray for me.

Always your loving sister,

Josephine

IX. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 11, 701 T.E.

Josephine,

Are you crazy? Is the university crazy? The fact that you want to spend more time in that horrible time and place should be proof that time travel has messed with your mind.

I get it. Now that you're hob-nobbing with celebrities, ordinary modern life just can't compare. I should never have told you who Darrin Royston was. He can't be that interesting. He won't even write anything for another ten years. Can he really compare to your charming, adorable sister?

But seriously, Josie, what are you thinking? Time travel is cool and all, and I'm sure you're doing good things, but you belong here. In a safe, civilized century. There are plenty of people in this time period who need you—I'm at the top of the list.

You're going to miss my birthday now, you know that?

Disgruntled,

Rachel

X. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 15, 701 T.E.

Josephine,

Are you mad at me? I'm sorry if I got snarky. I'm upset you're not coming home, but you're a big girl and we both have our own lives and you can make your own decisions. I can respect your choice to stay.

I know that you're busy, but can you spare ten seconds to send me a line so I know I haven't destroyed our relationship forever?

Rachel

XI. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 20, 701 T.E.

Josie,

Are the people of that century so much more important that you can't even send a line to your little sister? I know I'm not one to talk about prompt letter-writing, but under the circumstances, this is worrying. And kind of hurtful.

Rachel

XII. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 20, 701 T.E.

Josie,

I'm sorry.

Please write back.

Rachel

XIII. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Maj 20, 551 T.E.

Miss Rachel Forester:

I am writing with a heavy heart to inform you of the death of your sister, Nurse Josephine Forester. She went missing several days ago, and her body was found yesterday. She seems to have been killed in an accident with a stray shell near the hospital grounds. Millions of such unused artillery shells litter the countryside, and I'm afraid your sister was unfortunate enough to stumble upon one and become a casualty of war even in this time of peace.

No doubt you will receive notification through official channels, but I am aware she often contacted you via this letter-link, and I thought you might prefer to receive the news through a more personal route.

Your sister was a credit to her profession. She was a diligent, cheerful, kind, and invariably patient nurse. I am forever indebted to her for her personal kindnesses that brought light to hellish days.

Know that you and your family have my sympathy and my deepest condolences. You will remain in my prayers.

Yours,

Darrin Royston

XIV. Rachel Forester to Darrin Royston

What do you mean, dead?

She can't be dead. She won't be born for a hundred and fifty years.

Time travel's not supposed to work like that. She was supposed to do her research and come home.

It can't happen like that. I refuse to believe it. God wouldn't do that to us.

I haven't heard anything from her, but that's because you stole her letter-link. That must be it. Give it back, you thief, and think again before you go terrifying me with wild stories.

XV. Rachel Forester to Darrin Royston

Mr. Royston,

Don't read my last response. It wasn't supposed to send. Please ignore it. Give Josephine her letter-link back.

Thank you,

Rachel Forester

XVI. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Maj 21, 551 T.E.

Miss Forester,

I'm afraid I read both your of your letters, and they greatly puzzle me. Is this a fragment of one of your fantastical tales? That would be the most sensible assumption, except that the unopened letters you sent to your sister seem to confirm an impossible truth. Your sister came to us from a different time, you exist far in the future, and I am writing to a woman who has not yet been born.

I apologize for reading words that I was not meant to see, but the confusion they've caused has more than punished me for my curiosity. The implications of what you suggest are dizzying.

You are not writing in Valorian, which suggests that the peace holds, and you seem to write from a far more peaceful time. No wonder your stories held such hope. I can barely imagine a world beyond this battlefield hospital.

If I am reading the story correctly, your sister left a place of safety and peace and came to serve the suffering in a time of war. It makes her actions even more heroic and her death even more of a tragedy.

I don't pretend to understand how this is possible, but you have my gratitude and my sympathy.

Yours,

Darrin Royston

XVII. Rachel Forester to Darrin Royston

Maj 22, 701 T.E.

Darrin,

Yes, my sister is from the future. Yes, she came to help out during your war. And yes, you people killed her.

She could have been an aloof researcher, gathering information about the Western War, but she decided to help because she couldn't stand by while people were suffering. And she died for it.

What does it matter if you know the truth? Josephine always said that history can't be changed. I can't even wish that she hadn't gone on the trip, because apparently, the fact that she died in the past means she always died in the past. She was dead before she was born.

But how is that any different from the rest of us? Where I come from, you're long dead. To people in the future, I'm long dead. There's nothing we can do to change that, even with time travel, so what does anything matter?

If our every action is part of an unchangeable history, we're just cogs in a cosmic machine. It doesn't do any good to cry over it.

Rachel

XVIII. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Maj 23, 551 T.E.

Rachel,

I can't pretend to understand how time travel occurs, and the philosophical questions you pose seem far beyond my ken. But it is clear that you are grieving, and I can try to offer what comfort I can.

I'm no philosopher, but I know that the things we do, whenever we do them, matter. From where I lay in this hospital, your sister's actions were far from meaningless. She did not control her fate, but she had free will within it. Her choices made a world of difference to the men she helped.

We have a God who is outside of time. He incorporates our choices into His divine plan. Even if He, the author, knows the end of our story, our actions are what make the story what it is. We can choose to care or be callous, to create or destroy, and those choices ripple across time, for good and for ill.

This war will have effects far into the future, but there is also goodness that transcends time. God sent your sister to help from far in the future. I pray for you from far in the past. Your sister, outside of time, is now better able than ever to pray for us both.

I can't pretend that your sister's death was good. I can't pretend that this war is good. But if there is goodness beyond the end of the war--as your letters suggest--perhaps one day you will find some good that exists beyond the bounds of grief.

Yours,

Darrin Royston

XIX. Rachel Forester to Darrin Royston

Maj 24, 701 T.E.

Darrin,

I wish I could believe in what you say, but right now, hope seems impossible. Thank you for trying.

Rachel

XX. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Maj 25, 701 T.E.

Rachel,

That did get rather abstract, didn't it? I wish I could express myself in a way that makes the truth felt.

Maybe someday I'll have wisdom enough to do so.

Yours,

Darrin Royston

XXI. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 27, 771 T.E.

Josie,

The university sent me your personal belongings today, your letter-link among them. My last connection to the past—and, it feels like, to you—is gone. But Darrin says you're outside of time now, so maybe writing in here can reach you. I'm pretty sure that goes against science and philosophy and theology and probably lots of -ologies, but those were your kind of thing. I can never understand anything but stories.

I'm afraid I've loused things up. I freaked out and revealed time travel to Darrin Royston. It doesn't seem to have broken anything yet, but I feel terrible. You went into the past to help these people through suffering I can't even imagine. Meanwhile, I'm living in comfort and asked the poor boy to deal with my problems on top of his own. I've been selfish from beginning to end, and it's giving me a lot of guilt.

All the time travel in the world can't change that. All I can do is move forward. But I can't believe I can do that, not without you. Whatever stupid things I did, I knew I could count on you to have my back. To understand. To pull me back from the edge of the cliff or pick me up if I jumped off it. Now it's just me and I feel frozen. I'm cut off from the past and the future's a blank. How am I supposed to go on?

Pray for me, I guess. It's supposed to work across time and outside of time. It's the best we've got now. But it's nothing like getting a letter from you.

Love,

Rachel

XXII. Josephine Forester to Rachel Forester

Maj 11, 551 T.E.

Rachel,

Happy birthday!

Anyway, it'll be your birthday when you read this. I'm sorry I'm not there to celebrate with you, but maybe a good present will make up for it.

I can't send objects through time, but I sent a message to Harriet on the research team, and she's come through. This will arrive on your birthday, even if I can't come with it.

What you hold in your hands is a first edition of Darrin Royston's first collection of stories. Given recent events, it seemed only fitting. Here's proof your letters haven't stunted his career.

You're amazing, Rachel, and you've got a great future ahead of you.

Love,

Josephine

XXIII. Dedication in New Beginnings by Darrin Royston

For Rachel

May hope reach you at the proper time

Octon 12, 561 T.E.

XXIV. Rachel Forester to Harriet Zima

Maj 33, 771 T.E.

Harriet,

Thanks for the help with the birthday present. It means more to me than you can know.

Could you do me one more favor? For Josie's sake?

I have another thank you to send.

Rachel

XXV. Rachel Forester to Darrin Royston

Maj 33, 771 T.E.

Darrin,

I read your book. Actually, I reread it. I've read every one of those stories before in anthologies, in collections, as standalone stories. I had some of them practically memorized. But this was my first time reading the original collection. So it's the first time I read the dedication. And it's the first time I've known they were written for me.

I can't begin to explain what that feels like. Imagine a whole lot of tears—joy and guilt and just sheer overwhelmed—and you'll have a general idea.

The stories are fantastic, of course—they're classics! They're funny, profound, sweet, witty, thoughtful.

But the thing that means the most to me is the writing of them. I know something of what your life was like there at the end of the war—Josie sent me plenty of letters. You had so many problems of your own. You didn't need pampered little me throwing more problems on you. But you cared. You built a life after the end of the world and you sent out a light to brighten mine.

That's all we can do, isn't it? Every moment in time. Care about each other. That's what gets us through when it seems like the world has ended. It transcends time. You told me about it back then, but your book showed it to me. I can't imagine what I could have done to deserve such consideration ten years after our few letters, but I can't thank you enough.

Your future and forever friend,

Rachel Forester

XXVI. Harriet Zima to Rachel Forester

Rachel,

I'm letting one last letter through. Only because this is awesome. But I don't have the budget to justify any more favors.

Harriet

XXVII. Darrin Royston to Rachel Forester

Novrum 23, 561 T.E.

Rachel,

Your stories brought me comfort and hope at a time when I felt that I had none. The least I could do was return the favor.

These years since the war have brought grief and suffering, but also more joy and healing than I ever could have imagined. Time is a great healer--and I needed time to see the truth of that for myself, before I could begin to make others believe in it.

My little book, even now, is gaining attention. It is gratifying to know it will last. I can only pray my other words will last long enough to reach you. If ten years of experience can teach me this much, I am curious to see what I can learn with a little more time.

May we meet again on the bookshelves.

Your friend,

Darrin Royston

P.S. I've visited your sister's grave three times since the war. Knowing I will be her only visitor for more than a hundred years makes it a solemn duty, but it is also an honor to visit one who proved so good a friend. Each time, I ask her prayers for both of us. I know they are answered.

XXVIII. Rachel Forester to Josephine Forester

Maj 12, 702 T.E.

Josie,

I visited your grave today. The war-torn country you described in your letters is a lovely springtime meadow. Grimsby Hall is torn down, but there are plaques where the hospital stood, and the little graveyard stands in a peaceful grove of trees. The world has healed, and, slowly, so am I.

Your grave is marked by a clean white stone that's been kept free of moss and dirt. Darrin's family cared for it well. It only has the date of your death, but its existence proves that there are times in the past where you're alive. Outside of time where you are now, you're even more alive.

One day, we'll meet again, but until then, I've got work to do. I tried to avoid suffering in the past, leaving the painful work to you. But pain finds us no matter where we are. I can't stay focused on my own and ignore everyone else's. There are plenty of people, even in our own time, who need help. I've added some volunteer work to my rampant social schedule, trying to find out exactly where I can do the most good.

My experience with your work makes me a good candidate for the time travel program. I'll admit that I'm considering it. There's plenty of work to be done in the post-war world, and I've got connections there.

Love,

Rachel

#the bookshelf progresses #inklingschallenge #team tolkien #genre: time travel #theme: comfort #theme: pray #story: complete #not terribly happy with it but it's done

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oldiesstationlover11607 · 4 months ago

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hihiiii tis i the one and only soupiie!!

okay, i LOVED that domestic tyler fic with the xmas livestream and was wondering if you'd make fluffy josh x reader where she's seen by fans at a concert and take pics with them and then while josh is running to his b stage drumkit, he kisses her and the fans take pics. then maybe after the concert some fluff with josh and tyler.

love love loooveee your writing, please never stop, its one of the few things keeping me sane rn 🧡🧡🧡

Barrier Kisses - Josh Dun x Reader

Warnings: Nothing hehe

Word Count: 1087

A/N: RAHH LOVE THIS SO MUCH! Hello soupiiiie!! Thank you for requesting something! I'm so glad you're enjoying my writing. It's kinda hard to keep it up considering how my requests have been fewer and fewer but I'm trying :) Please request another piece!!

The energy in the arena was nothing short of magical. I could feel it in my chest, the heavy thrum of bass and the sea of voices singing along with Tyler as the show reached its halfway point. The Clancy Tour was in full swing, and the fans were louder than ever — their excitement so infectious, I found myself smiling without even realizing it.

I stood tucked off to the side of the stage, close enough to watch Josh's every move but far enough to stay out of the spotlight. Tyler was on the main stage, delivering one of his iconic speeches, hyping the crowd up before Routines in the Night. Meanwhile, Josh was preparing for his run to the B-stage, ready for the song to start while Tyler stood under the stage with Mark.

I couldn’t help but feel a little thrill every time I saw Josh on stage, the way his presence just filled the entire arena. It wasn’t just the drumming, though that was always mesmerizing — it was the way he connected with the fans, like each beat he hit meant something to them. And to me.

Lost in the moment, I barely noticed the small group of fans standing near the barrier who had spotted me. I wasn’t exactly trying to keep a low profile, but I didn’t expect them to recognize me. Their eyes went wide, and then one of the girls waved me over, excitement practically bursting from her.

“Are you Josh’s girlfriend?” she asked, voice high-pitched with nerves but sweet as ever.

I felt my face flush, but I smiled. “Yeah, I am.”

Immediately, phones were pulled out and I laughed softly, shaking my head. I wasn’t exactly used to the attention, but it was kind of cute how excited they were. They asked for a few pictures, and I couldn’t say no. The girls were so kind, gushing about how much they loved Josh, and it made me proud to know that he had fans like them.

“Can we get a picture with you?” another girl asked.

“Of course!” I agreed, stepping over closer to the barrier and posing with them.

We chatted a bit about the tour, their favorite songs, and how long they’d been following the band. I could tell how much the show meant to them, and it made my heart swell knowing Josh and Tyler could bring that kind of joy into people’s lives.

“Do you think we could get a picture of you and Josh?” one of them asked with wide, hopeful eyes.

I laughed, feeling my face heat up again. “I think he’s a little busy for that right now,” I said, glancing back toward the stage where Tyler was winding down his speech. Josh was waiting in the wings, just a few feet away, already prepared to make his sprint toward the B-stage.

Right on cue, the lights shifted, casting everything in deep reds and golds, the perfect backdrop for his run. I turned to see Josh glance over at me, that unmistakable smile on his face. My heart skipped a beat. It always did when he looked at me like that — like I was the only person in the room.

And then, without warning, he started jogging over. The fans around us squealed in surprise, and my eyes widened as he came closer.

He didn’t stop running, just slowed enough to lean in and press a quick kiss to my lips. It was so fast but so sweet, leaving me blushing as the fans around us erupted into excited cheers.

The sound of phones clicking and capturing the moment filled the air, and I was half-laughing, half-shocked by how casual Josh had made it all seem. He just flashed me another grin and took off again, heading toward the B-stage to continue the show as if nothing had happened.

My heart raced as I turned back toward the fans, who were all wide-eyed and giggling, holding up their phones like trophies.

“Did you see that?” one of them gasped. “That was so cute!”

I just laughed, feeling giddy myself. “Yeah, he's… kind of perfect, huh?”

The rest of the concert felt like a blur. Every time Josh’s drum beats echoed through the arena, I could feel the memory of that quick kiss lingering in my mind. And from the way the fans nearby kept sneaking glances at me, I knew they'd be talking about it for weeks.

After the show, the backstage area was quieter, though still buzzing with the after-show energy that always seemed to linger. I made my way through the halls, weaving past crew members and friends until I found Josh in the green room, towel around his neck, sweat still glistening on his skin from the performance. Tyler was with him, lounging on the couch, scrolling through his phone.

“There she is!” Josh beamed, pushing off the arm of the couch to meet me halfway. He pulled me into a warm, post-show hug, the kind that always made me feel like home.

“You really kissed me in front of everyone?” I teased, poking him in the chest as I looked up at him, but I couldn’t hide the smile on my face.

Josh chuckled, his hand coming up to brush a stray hair from my face. “Couldn’t help it,” he said, eyes soft. “I saw you there, and I just… had to.”

Tyler snorted from the couch. “Real smooth, Josh.”

Josh rolled his eyes, still grinning. “You’re just jealous because Jenna’s not here tonight.”

Tyler held up his hands in mock defense. “Hey, I’m just saying — it was pretty bold, man. Risky move, but I respect it.”

I laughed, leaning into Josh’s side, his arm wrapping around me protectively. “Well, the fans loved it,” I said, thinking back to all the excited faces and cameras. “They were snapping pictures like crazy.”

Josh leaned down and kissed the top of my head, softer this time, a little more private. “Good,” he murmured. “Maybe I’ll make it a habit.”

Tyler groaned dramatically. “Please, spare us.”

Josh just grinned wider, pulling me closer as we all sank into the easy, comfortable feeling that came after a successful show. It was moments like this — the quiet in the storm, the laughter and love we shared — that made everything worth it.

And as I rested my head against Josh’s shoulder, I couldn’t help but think that this life, this wild, crazy life with him, was more than I could’ve ever dreamed of.

REQUESTS OPEN

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quinloki · 6 months ago

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quin-uhhh:

would you?!

Fic authors self rec! When you receive this, reply with favorite five fics you've written (include links, and if you want- a few thoughts about each one), then pass on to at least five other writers if you're up for it. Spread the self-love ✨

If you don't, I'll just... I'll just... well I won't do a thing but please?!

many fist pumps,

▲ I'm a symbol now

\o/ Tri, my sweet friend, you are - if anything - a symbol of good cheer =D ♥

Let's see, five favorite fics I've written. That's much easier than trying to pick just one ^_^

Birds of a Feather Marco/Reader ( tumblr / Ao3 / Wattpad ) - This is my most recently completed fic, at least at the time of this post, but I love it so much. My passion for Marco feels like it came out of nowhere and has made itself reigning champion in my thoughts. But a story I expected to be relatively short, ended up almost twice as long as I expected, and it was so easy. It was fun to write, and I think it goes down smooth, despite being nearly 90k words people consistently devour it in a single sitting.

Quicksand Sir Crocodile/Reader ( tumblr / Ao3 / Wattpad ) - Not sure if you're a fan of the sandy crocodile-themed warlord? Tread carefully, reading this title is statistically likely to convert you. Quicksand has an alternative ending because the story was originally intended to be a very dark Yandere - to the point that Doflamingo would've been the "good" guy. That's not how things went, and I'm quite glad for it. Quicksand going its own direction is what helped seal the deal in creating the Tales of the Grandline Metropolis, which is currently 3.8 completed stories. (it'll be at least 8 before it's done).

A Light Touch Eustass Kid/Reader ( Ao3 / Wattpad ) - My first Eustass Kid/Reader story. Set in the same AU as Quicksand, it was started from a pun, of all things. I figured Kid would be fancy tech stuff like neural-linked prosthetics, and the idea that would make a prosthetic for the reader after they lost a hand was something I wanted to write. Creating something like that would take a light touch, and if it glowed, that would be a different kind of light touch and getting close to Kid requires a light-- you get the point. Like I said, it's all based off a pun, but I'm really proud of the story, it's one of my favorite re-reads.

Some Direction Zoro/Reader (tumblr / Ao3 / Wattpad ) - A Modern AU where the government mandates who you marry. I have to give thanks to @lyndsyh24 for not only inspiring me to write this one (start to finish in a single month, I was obsessed!) but also for allowing my to play in the AU she'd built up. From Matchbook to the laws themselves, it's all thanks to Lyn. Zoro started out as one of my favorite characters in the series - I still have love for him, and I'm always happy to write him, but he's taken a bit of a back seat to my top three. Still Some Direction is a story I'm really proud of - even if I worry there'll be a mob after me for who the antagonist is 😅

Family Ties Doflamingo/Reader ( Ao3 / Wattpad ) - I was torn on this last choice - even with five slots it's hard to decide between stories I suppose ^^; Also, oops, apparently I only put the first ten chapters on tumblr... I need to fix that >.> Ahem, anyway, Family Ties is the first fic I wrote after over ten years of not writing at all. It's my first reader insert, my first true multi-chapter too. When I wrote it, it was the longest fic I'd written by nearly 50k words. I wrote it because I wanted a more morally ambiguous reader compared to what I'd been reading. It's not a dark fic though, it's pretty tooth-achingly sweet, honestly, but it's currently the only fic I have where the reader is a murderer in a very undisputed and direct manner.

Honorable mention I almost posted as piece 5 - The Dragon's Clause - my Sabo/Reader Noble/Fantasy/Magic AU, and also the only title I mention that's incomplete. But it's a an ode to my favorite genre, and a great many of my favorite tropes.

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autumnshighlady · 11 months ago

Text

All I Gave You Is Gone (ACOTAR x The Silmarillion AU) - Chapter 1

RHYSAND'S SISTER X MAEDHROS

summary: The story begins with High Lord Rhysand’s sister, Ravenna, moments before her death. Before the sword is swung across her neck, she pleads to the Mother to rescue her, to intervene and get her out. Ravenna’s prayers are answered, and she wakes up in a strange land across the stars, far away from her home – Arda.

warnings: graphic violence

word count: 3.6k

DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE

a/n: this AU is so niche that most people probably don't know what the Silmarillion is - fear not! I will be writing it in a way that you won't need to know anything about lotr or the silm to understand it, as everything will be explained. I'm super excited for this series and I hope you guys grow to enjoy it. Any support is appreciated! Huge shoutout to the Anon that inspired this!

Screams rang through the shrieking wind, rattling Ravenna’s eardrums as a coppery tang filled her mouth. It was almost impossible to see anything amidst the smoke and rain, not that she wanted to be cursed with witnessing the horrifying scene. No, part of Ravenna was glad for the masking of the carnage.

The scent of blood choked her senses, closing up her throat and making her eyes burn. Her head throbbed from the impact of its collision on the nearby rock, stomach stinging in pain from the arrow laced with faebane that was lodged in her flesh. Through blurry vision, Ravenna lifted her head, groaning as every ounce of her body protested. Up above, the few fully trained Illyrian soldiers that were stationed at the war camp were falling from the sky, their lifeless bodies brutalised upon meeting the rocky ground. Hybern soldiers swarmed them like ants, their laughter echoing above the sounds of slaughter.

Tears pricked at Ravenna’s eyes as she inhaled deeply, immobilised by her wounds and the faebane arrow in her stomach that stifled her magic. She hadn’t even wanted to come here today to the Illyrian war camp with her mother, Nienna. They had fought over it – Ravenna had even offered to go to the Hewn City with her brother, Rhysand, then accompany her mother to Illyria. She hated it there. Everything from the leering males and the icy chill, to the sight of downtrodden females with their heads low and their wings clipped. Despite being half-Illyrian, Ravenna never felt any desire to spend time there.

Her black hair stuck to her face, clinging to her skin as the rain poured down. She lifted her wings, trying to flap them enough to get her body off the ground, but it was no use. They were dead weight on her back, too exhausted from the effects of the faebane to help her. Panic began to settle in as Ravenna realised she could not make her wings disappear with the poison in her veins. Her wings were a target now, a weak spot. Unable to defend herself, she was now a sitting duck.

As she laid there half-conscious, the screams eventually stopped, her blood turning to ice at the eerie silence from Illyrians in the war camp. Ravenna let out a sob. As Hybern soldier’s footsteps echoed on the hard ground, growing closer to where she was laying beside the rocks, she knew she was going to die.

“Hey! There’s one over here!” A gruff male voice called, followed by the sound of cheering.

No. This couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t real.

Pathetically, Ravenna tried to drag herself away, fingernails breaking and scraping against the hard rock, efforts in vain. Panic rose in her chest as the sound of the soldier’s leering grew closer, closing in on her like a pack of wolves.

Thanks to the arrow, she had no magic to defend herself. Her asshole father, Ronan, the High Lord of the Night Court, had never even let her train to defend herself. She knew a couple moves from her sparring with Cassian and Azriel, but they were useless in this situation. Ravenna could hear Azriel’s voice in her head, pleading for her to get up and take a stand. But she couldn’t. Every muscle in her body was lifeless, her head spinning and aching with pain.

“Pretty little princess, all on her own...” One of the soldiers sneered, twirling his sword in his hands as he came to stand above her. She could practically smell his rotten breath amidst the blood covering his body that was not his own.

Ravenna tried to lift her head, but a dirty boot quickly connected with it with such force her neck snapped backwards, body jolting painfully. Fresh blood began to pour from the gaping wound on her forehead, and she cursed under her breath. Snide laughter sounded from above her, echoing in all directions as the world spun. “Nobody can help you now, princess.” One of the other soldiers said. “Not your half-breed brother, not your spy boyfriend. Certainly not your mommy.”

Ignoring the screaming pain, Ravenna opened her violet eyes and looked upwards at the soldier. Her gaze met his blood-stained face, then travelled down to his hands, eyes settling on what was grasped within them.

In his left hand was a familiar set of wings, tarnished with mud and dirt. Blood pooled onto the ground beneath them like a river. Bile rose in Ravenna’s throat as her gaze landed on his right hand.

And she screamed, raw and painfully.

In the soldier’s right hand was a severed head with long, dark locks identical to her own. Purple eyes were wide, face twisted in a frozen picture of agony, a female mid-scream. Bruises and scrapes were littered across the face, but it was unmistakable nonetheless.

It was Nienna. Her mother. The beautiful seamstress who had held Ravenna in her arms for countless nights, who taught her everything she knew. The female who kept her chin high, even as males sneered at her for her lowborn status. Dead. Dead before Ravenna’s very eyes.

Screams continued to rip through Ravenna, cursing the Hybern soldiers with promises of slow and agonising death. She didn’t care that she, too, was about to meet the same fate as her mother. As soldiers grabbed her arms and hauled her upright to her knees, she thrashed and fought like a wildcat. More hands grabbed her, steadying her slightly as she spat at them, tears streaming down her face.

“Hold her steady!” One of the soldiers snapped before bending down to sneer in her face. “It’s your turn, half-breed bitch. But first we gotta take care of those wings. Can’t have you flying away now, can we?”

“If you cut off my wings, I will flay you.” She spat in his face, screeching as one of the soldiers reached down and ripped the arrow out of her stomach, shredding the flesh as blood began pouring out of her faster.

The soldier snickered, his dark eyes brimming with hate as his twisted face stood mere inches from her own. “We won’t do that quite yet, that takes away half the fun. Your bitch mother bled to death when we ripped her wings from her body, so we didn’t get to enjoy her. We won’t make that same mistake with you.”

Ravenna howled furiously, sinking her canines into the nearby arm of a soldier as hard as she could. A whip cracked across her back in response, cleaving flesh from bone in one stroke as it shredded the material of her black dress. She bit down harder on the arm as pain blinded her, the blood of the soldier making her gag and eventually release him. At least her scream had been muffled.

Before she could curse them out again, she felt it. The presence of a cold, small blade against her wing. Right in the very spot she had seen scars on every female in the Illyrian camps.

No. No no no no.

She hadn’t even realised she was screaming the words out loud, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks as she begged and pleaded pathetically. Flying was her favourite thing to do. She would spend hours soaring through the skies, feeling the wind on her wings as she shot through the air like a shooting star. Sometimes she had flown hand in hand with Azriel above Velaris before their relationship had soured in the last few months, admiring the dazzling view of the city below. Flying was her peace.

Ravenna had accepted that she would die at the hands of the soldiers. But to die with her wings clipped would break something inside of her.

“Rhys!” She began screaming out her brother’s name mindlessly, despite the fact he was miles away and likely clueless as to what was going on in the war camp. “Rhys! Rhys!” She screamed over and over, praying that somehow he would show up out of nowhere and save her.

Her pleading only spurred the soldiers on more, and then that blade made an incision in the wing’s tendon near her back, the one that her wings relied on to carry her body. She barely even felt the physical pain from the slice as she screamed furiously, not just for herself, but for every female who had gone through this.

For decades, she had argued with her father over the practice of wing clipping. Gone head to head with the High Lord over it. Rhys would often have to step in, talking his father down from clipping his daughter’s own wings as punishment for slaughtering every male she could find who kept the practice going. Ravenna never cared how angry Ronan got with her over it, for she had no shame in taking it upon herself to try and end wing clipping. No matter how much he threatened her, yelled at her, she didn’t care. For she knew that she was untouchable – the people of Velaris loved her too much for the High Lord to get away with locking up or punishing his own daughter.

And now here she was, bleeding from that one tendon in her wings, rendered unable to fly for the rest of her life.

The soldiers whopped and cheered, spurred on by her tears as Ravenna cried angrily. Her body felt numb – a blessing as the Hybern soldiers began to brutalise her body with their fists, whips, and blades. Her skin was sliced and bruised and spat on, but she barely felt it. All she could feel was the hole inside her chest at the sight of her mother’s wings and head, now discarded on the cold, wet ground like trash.

Rain mixed with blood, blood mixed with tears, mud and grime becoming her second skin as Ravenna was pummelled into the ground. A barbed whip lashed at her skin, the soldiers having ripped open parts of her dress to expose her soft flesh like meat about to be butchered. The whirling black Illyrian tattoos that marked her body were now hidden behind red blood. They had begun at her left thigh and coming up across her hips and ribs, swirling up to the right side of her body across her back and collarbones then travelling down her arm. Now, they were marred, a ruined art piece at the hands of Hybern.

Please. Ravenna begged the Mother silently, teary gaze lifting up to the darkening sky where a few stars peeked out behind the rain clouds. Please help me. Get me away from here. Please, I will do anything. Just get me out of here.

She could have sword one of the stars brightened in response. Throughout lash after lash, she kept praying silently. Grimy hands groped at her flesh, digging into the fresh wounds and twisting her like a ragdoll. She closed her eyes, feeling the cold blade of a sword line up against the back of her neck, ready to swing down on it and cleave her head from her shoulders.

And then everything went bright, instead of the darkness that Ravenna had expected. White hot fire overtook her body, and then it all faded away.

****************

The first thing Ravenna felt was the wind on her skin. It was gentler than the harsh wind of Illyria, but still strong. It soothed her body, which felt lifeless. The rocks she was laying on felt different than before, and she realised it was dirt beneath her, not stone. Her throat was dry, mouth caked with blood as she inhaled a deep breath. The air was fresh, not stifled with the scent of the war camp’s death. It filled her lungs blissfully, and it took all her strength to crack open her eyes.

She was met by sunlight, blinding her momentarily before her eyes finally adjusted. From her position on the ground, she could make out soft, windswept grass on either side of a dirt road. She was in a valley, a mountain pass judging by the steep hills nearby and the narrow windingness of the path ahead.

Ravenna’s mind was still swirling as she fought to figure out where she was. The landscape was unlike anything she had seen before in the Night Court. There was something different here, something that unsettled her bones. It did not feel like Prythian, somehow.

Before she could go through what she knew of the landscape of the various other courts, voices sounded in the distance, along with hoofsteps. Ravenna stiffened, pushing herself up into a sitting position as the sound grew closer. But it did not sound like the rough, sneering voices of Hyberm. No, these voices were different. They were strong, but songlike, lilting up and down in tones unfamiliar to Ravenna. From the winding path emerged a small group of males on horseback. They donned silver armour, long hair flowing in the wind and revealing pointed ears. Ravenna’s brow furrowed. She had not seen fae like this before, but something in her gut told her they were different. Sure, they donned the same ethereal grace to them matched with pointed ears, but there was an unsettling difference between them and the fae males Ravenna had previously encountered. They did not have a predatory feel to them like most fae males, but seemed colder. Calculating.

And nonetheless, terrifying.

A male with long blonde hair shouted something and charged his horse forward, icy blue eyes fixated on Ravenna as his group followed. She could barely move her aching body, merely slumping in defeat as the horses surrounded her in a perfect circle, a various assortment of blades and arrows pointed at her. On instinct, Ravenna lifted her wings to shoot herself up into the sky away from the males, but with the incision made she could barely lift them off the ground.

Once again, she was defenceless.

A male with black hair and cold, grey eyes barked something at her in that unfamiliar language. Squinting against the bright sun, Ravenna looked up to meet his stare. He and the blonde male were the only ones without helms and armour – the leaders, she presumed. An eight-pointed star marked the centre of their embroidered white tunics, and red capes flowed behind them in the wind.

When she didn’t answer, the black-haired male repeated his question, angrier this time.

“I’m sorry…” She muttered, barely getting the words out due to her dry throat. “I don’t understand…”

This time, it was the blonde male who spoke up. “You speak the common tongue?” He asked, his voice less harsh but still with a lethal edge to it. She nodded.

“Who are you and why are you in the pass of Aglon?” He continued, pressing his blade against her throat. She swallowed – never before had she seen such a beautiful blade, marked with swirling inscriptions and metalwork that would impress the most prestigious blacksmith in the Night Court.

Evenly, she met his blue eyes, which scanned her up and down. Distaste and surprise came across his beautiful features as he seemingly focused on the blood covering her body rather than her wings. Finally, Ravenna realised her dress had all but been torn to shreds, revealing her wounded skin in places she would have preferred to cover up. She curled herself into a ball, hands desperately trying to cover the parts of herself that had been revealed by the rips in her dress.

But the males did not leer like she had anticipated. Even the dark-haired one who had snapped at her in that foreign language did not seem affected by her skin on display. He was more focused on her wings, which were covered in Illyria’s mud and dirt. Ravenna still trembled with fear in their presence, but at least they seemed better than Hybern thus far.

“The pass of… what?” She asked, even more confused. She had never heard of such a place before. Certainly not in Prythian. Where the hell was she and what happened?

“She’s a spy of the Dark Lord, brother.” The dark-haired male said, a hateful look in his eyes as he drew his bow. “Let us kill her and be done with it.”

“Put that away, Curufin.” The blonde one scolded with authority. “We are in Maitimo’s lands. He will decide what to do with her. Spy or not, she comes with us. He will have our heads if we kill her without his permission.”

Curufin rolled his grey eyes and retracted his bow. “As you wish, Tyelkormo.”

Ravenna’s mind reeled and the sound of the names being given, especially the last one. They were unlike anything she had heard before, leaving her even more confused. Was she dead? Was this some sort of strange afterlife? She shivered – by the way the wind bit at her cold skin, she knew she was very much alive.

The blond one whose name Ravenna’s brain hadn’t wrapped around took note of her shiver, huffing loudly before muttering something in another tongue to one of his guards. He swung a leg off of his grey horse and slid down onto the ground, walking over to where Ravenna sat in the dirt. Part of her instincts told her to run, to back away from this ethereal, too-perfect looking male. But another part of her was lured in by his beauty, as if some strange spell surrounded him.

She baulked as he came to stand over her, blue eyes mercilessly staring her down as if she were nothing more than a speck of dirt. The male was enormous, almost a foot taller than Cassian was. Long, silver-blonde hair flowed over his shoulders, two small braids behind each ear trailing down beside his neck. Jewellery adorned his pointed ears, which were similar in shape to her own. Based on his elaborate-looking attire this male was of a decent status wherever they were.

The blonde male unclasped his cloak, tossing the fabric towards Ravenna. She caught it, the material soft as clouds in her hands as she wrapped it around herself, grateful for the warmth.

But there was no warmth in the male’s eyes as he barked at her, “Get up.”

Keeping the cloak wrapped around her blood-soaked body, Ravenna pushed herself up. But her legs buckled, sending her tumbling painfully back to the ground. She hissed in pain, pressing her hand into her stomach where the wound from the arrow was. Her fae healing had kicked in enough that it began to slowly heal, but not nearly fast enough.

“Are you incapable of following orders and standing up?” He hissed angrily.

Despite her pain and exhaustion, fire lit in Ravenna’s veins at his attitude. “I’m not exactly in a position to do so without struggle.” She snapped, unfolding the cloak just enough to reveal the large, unmistakable arrow wound in her stomach.

His blue eyes followed, assessing the wound with impatience. “You’ll live.”

“Unfortunate for you.” She shot back, temper heightened by the ache in her wings.

The male scoffed. “Do you even know who I am?”

“No.”

“I am Lord Celegorm, Prince of the Noldor and third son of Fëanor.” He stuck his chin arrogantly in the air.

Ravenna took a deep breath to steady herself, slouching and rolling her eyes. “I must have hit my head pretty hard. I have no fucking clue what any of that means.”

Surprise crossed Celegorm’s face, and he exchanged an uneasy look with his brother. Curufin shrugged, muttering something in that strange tongue before turning his grey eyes back towards Ravenna. “And who exactly are you, may I ask?” He said dryly.

“Ravenna,” She said. “Princess of the Night Court. Daughter of Ronan, the High Lord.” She introduced herself in a similar manner to Celegorm, snorting at the confusion that continued to grow on his face.

“What are you talking about?” He snapped. “There is no such a court here, or a Lord Ronan.”

Ravenna shrugged. “Now you know how I feel, I guess. Believe me, I don’t know where the hell I am or how I got here. I am just as confused as you. I mean you no harm, I swear by the Mother.”

“That will be for Maitimo to judge.” Was all Celegorm said before reaching down for Ravenna’s trembling, weak body. She did not have time to protest or process what was happening as he reached underneath her wings and legs, lifting her up into his arms as if she weighed nothing. The world swayed as she was picked up. Thankfully, he did so in such a manner she remained covered with the cloak.

Still, she did not like being manhandled. “Put me down!” Ravenna hissed furiously, writhing as best she could in his grip. But it was no use – between her weakness, lack of powers, and Celegorm’s sheer size and strength, it was pointless.

Celegorm lifted her onto his horse and set her on the front end of the saddle before climbing up behind her. She winced in pain as his large frame brushed against the incision on her wings. “Watch the wings.” She snapped.

“We are taking you to our eldest brother.” Celegorm said, ignoring her protest but leaning back ever so slightly and relieving the contact on her wings. “He can decide what to do with you. It is half a day’s journey from here, so I suggest you rest while you still can.”

All Ravenna could do was sigh and hold onto the horse’s mane as the prince sent the group forward up the winding mountain pass. She had come no closer to figuring out where she was, or who these strange fae-looking people were.

And she had half a day to do her best to figure it out.

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