#While I'm on this tangent if any of you know adults who tell teenagers they don't realize how easily they can die

[deergirlslut]

this is a hell of a post to see literally the night after I thought I killed someone with my train

[anarchosimdicalist]

some dumb jocks for @rainymoodlet/@kissmeinkomorebi's bc

lou larson (contestant)

bisexual bigender butch (she/he)

adult (43)

maker, gloomy, goofball

renaissance sim aspiration

5'9

divorcedest bitch in komorebi

good with kids, has such dad energy you forget he doesn't have any

he's funny but sometimes you have to stop him mid joke to go "hey are you ok?????"

not as committed a jock as katsuo, but definitely makes an effort to keep fit, if only to make herself leave the house.

very handy - aside from woodwork, she fixes cars for fun.

hino katsuo (outsider)

none gender with left gay (he/they)

adult (38)

active, adventurous, childish

extreme sports enthusiast

5'11

dumbass slutty jock with negative impulse control and a heart of gold

a little bit of an adrenaline junkie, always looking for a new way to put himself in mild danger.

he has a tendency to make big plans for holidays or ambitious projects - and then follows through on maybe a third of them.

was a little bit of a musician back in the day - never made it big, but the important thing is he knows his way around sound equipment.

backstory under the cut - it got WAY too long but we move.

There's a story Lou likes to tell, after she's had a few drinks and she's feeling talkative. He takes one last sip to lubricate, clears his throat dramatically, and everyone leans in to listen.

"Okay, so it's Moonlight Falls. Almost 20 years ago, now? They've got this Lumberee thing going on. I used to go when I was a kid, see, and even now I'm a big grown-up boy going out on my own, I still come back every year to eat my dad's food and, fuckin', I don't know, check out the music. They have this little wood-carving competition but I only ever watch for ideas, 'cause I'm a cocky little 20something shit still and I think I'm way too cool for it.

"Except this one year there's a lady." Pause for wolf-whistles, or "aww"s, depending on the crowd. "I've been flirting with her hard, and it's going pretty smooth. I mean, she's so into me it's kind of embarrassing for her. She says she loves the woodcarving competition but I say these guys are all hacks, I've made better easily. And she doesn't believe me, but I've backed myself into a corner now and the only way out is through, so I say I'll enter so I can get her dinner with the winnings.

"It's actually way cooler than I thought. There's this old, old guy who does it every year, some teenager whose friends talked him into it, all sorts. But my favourite is this dude from out of town who entered on a whim, like me. We chat while we work and we really hit it off. Few years down the line, I switch on the TV, guess who that guy turned into? Fucking Daniel Taylor." Sometimes someone will ask "who?" and Lou will launch into a tangent. "Who? Daniel Taylor. Your Dad's Garage Daniel Taylor? Come on, man, you've seen Your Dad's Garage. Well, you should. Look it up. He's great, and he's just as nice in person. He was a really interesting guy, had some good stories - not bad to look at either. We could've been friends, probably, but I look up from the chair I'm making and I see the girl watching me, and our eyes meet across the tent, and I remember - oh, yeah, I'm not here to make friends."

And this is where his story has to diverge a little. The grand finale used to be easy - he would reach for her wife's hand, or fix her with an adoring look, or, if she wasn't around, affect a boyish, half-ironic bragging tone, and he'd say, "So I kicked Daniel Taylor's ass. My chair blows his and everyone else's out of the water, I win us a good fancy dinner and then some, and I've been with her ever since."

As it turns out, it loses its gravitas once the girl leaves you. If she changes the ending, says "and I was with that girl for almost 20 years before she told me I was "messy" and "incapable of taking her seriously" and kicked me out of her house, taking all of our mutual friends with her", the love story feels hollow. If she skips over it, it feels dishonest, and it all starts falling apart at the first follow-up question. This story is meant to end happily ever after. It isn't meant to end with Lou living on his gym buddy's futon, crying periodically and watching old Your Dad's Garage episodes because they remind him of her.

But life isn't a story, and Katsuo is getting worried. When Lou first moved in, she was somewhere between an aquaintance and a friend. They worked out together if they were both around, and Katsuo let her shower at their nearby house when he mentioned feeling off in the gendered public ones at the gym, but they rarely hung out otherwise. Still, though - when she nervously asked if Katsuo wanted a roommate after her divorce, he jumped at the chance. Sure, he needed help with the rent, but living alone had been rough - maybe they'd get a friend out of it too.

It's been months now, and get a friend they did. The two of them are inseparable, their daily routines intertwined - they work out together, cook together, Lou even got Katsuo into her favourite show (and that woodworker is one fine DILF). But the more Katsuo gets to know Lou, the more he starts to worry. He can hardly expect her to be over a relationship so long-term in a few months, but he's grown fond of her now, to the point where seeing her in this state is painful.

Katsuo's solution only makes Lou wonder if his new best friend is an evil genius or a complete idiot. Her interest in Daniel's show was minimal - he hates nostalgic cashgrabs just a little more than he loves Daniel's work - but when they suggested he go on, he couldn't deny being intrigued. When they added that they had always wanted to go up Mt Komorebi, and that maybe a little sound guy work could help cover some of those travel expenses, she laughed so hard she almost forgot about her divorce for a minute. The application process was a drunken evening filling out forms and laughing. Neither one of them had planned on it actually working.

[bestbonnist]

Chapter 155.8

Satoru showed up instead of Fushi! I’m getting a bit concerned about what’s taking them so long and if they’ve been held up. It might also be an avoidance tactic. If they show up only to learn that they were too late (again) then it’s better not to show up.

Intervening like this is something the Beholder would absolutely never do. Even though Satoru’s mannerisms and decisions have mostly matched the Beholder’s, it’s clear now that he actually cares about people who have nothing to do with him. He didn't need to bike over though, there was probably a more time-efficient magic way.

It would be easier, and better for Fushi and their friends for all of the knockers inside the fake-Fushi and Tonari to die. But even though they’re the same as the previous era knockers—without a consciousness or personality—they have the potential to feel pain and love, like humans. Remember, Fushi developed their humanity because they were in a human body. How are the fake-Fushi and Tonari any different from how they used to be?

So the one in Mizuha's body is definitely the left hand. She broke her spine you don’t just get up from that. The girl herself has either fucked off to Paradise or is currently watching the left hand bastardize her character from somewhere nearby.

Person who only ever thinks about Kahaku: “I’m getting a lot of Kahaku vibes from this.”

See, the thing about Bon is, he was surrounded by a bunch of people who loved him too much to tell him no while he was growing up. After the Uralis arc where he had to deal with not getting what he wanted for the first time, he matured and became a better person as a result. When he interacts with teenagers like Fushi, Kahaku, and Mizuha, he doesn’t want to coddle them like he was coddled, so he ends up coming across as somewhat cold and uncaring. There’s a lot to be said about Bon’s definition of adult: like how he thinks that as an adult, he shouldn't let himself be selfish; how he lost Fushi and Kahaku's trust because he treated them like adults and expected them to sacrifice everything for their cause; or how he’s been encouraging Fushi to make choices based on their own desires in the present era but still steps in to steer them another direction if they go somewhere he doesn't like.

The reason I'm going on this tangent is because the bit of dialogue Bon had in this chapter reminded me of this aspect of his character that Ooima has clearly thought out but is for some reason not drawing much attention to. And, you know, he probably sees himself in Mizuha here which is making him a lot less compassionate than he might be.

Either the left hand has become a better actor or it really is touched by this. If it's the latter... funny how Yuuki appeals to the left hand and Fushi with hot pot.

Person who only ever thinks about Kahaku: “I’m getting a lot of Kahaku vibes from this.”

I'm kind of losing it about the way this whole chapter has been setting up Yuuki’s belief in a peaceful outcome and how humans and knockers can coexist and now the solution is being handed to him on a silver platter and it’s so obviously a trap but he can’t not take it because that’s who he is and the narrative has been pushing this for months and the left hand is confident that this is going to work because it was actually paying attention when Yuuki asked to be friends and is now using that against him but it wouldn’t be able to use it against him if it didn’t actually give a shit in the first place!!! Like… I’m remembering how Kahaku (person who only ever thinks about—) was able to convince the left hand to come back with him because the left hand didn’t know him AT ALL and didn’t understand that maybe some people have things they value more than their own life and now it’s banking on Yuuki risking his life for peace.

[aquariusshadow]

It’s really not that deep or should I say superficial. Love was that tad more relatable to as a character (minus the murder) than what Joe was. She’d just had a baby and he already had eyes on another woman. He makes her feels insane for killing Natalie on a whim, when he does the exact same thing with Mariannes husband. He spends the entire show pretty much narrating how she’s some super emotional woman who can’t control her feelings when he’s the exact the same - like you said, they’re soulmates. Except this is an experience (w/o the murder context) that every woman has likely experienced at some point in their life.

For a lot of us that are memeing around, enjoying the show for what it is, preferring Love over Joe or vise versa, etc, it isn't that serious. That's why my post was directed specifically at people unironically romanticizing and excusing Love's actions because that's what I've been seeing. I'll requote and even tweak my final statement on the OG post here (tweaks in bold): Empathizing, analyzing, relating on some level, enjoying, and understanding a character’s motives is very different than romanticizing and genuinely excusing their actions unironically and my issue is I’ve seen too much of the latter and not enough of the former.

--

You're absolutely right on why Love would come off as more relatable. Hell I found her more relatable myself most of the time while watching season 3. But, just because she's more relatable, especially since she's reflecting an experience that a lot women have gone through, doesn't automatically make her exempt from criticism. (And for the record, I don't see your comments as romanticizing Love, in fact, you're empathizing, and explaining, which is nice to see! So, I hope if you do read this you don't think I'm including your ask/comments along with those I am criticizing.)

The biggest one she should get, which to me really solidifies Love and Joe being mirrors to each other, is that she hooks up with with 19 year old, teenage/barely an adult Theo Engler who is in a very fragile mental state. The argument can be made that she did so because she was hurting because of Joe, which is definitely true, but I would also make the argument that she would do it anyways as I don't think it's only because of Joe (but that's going too far off tangent, I'm more than willing to expand on my thoughts about this on another post). Poor Theo was genuinely enamored with Love and was willing to 'save' her from Joe (which he was right about Joe, I don't want to disregard that), yet in the end, when Theo became an official obstacle in Love's eyes and saw the real Love, she tried to kill him without blinking (and she died believing she succeeded in killing him). Either way, regardless on what arguments would be made, Love hooking up with Theo was wrong and ngl I am surprised at the lack of commentary surrounding this very complex relationship.

Just because she's more relatable to the viewer, doesn't change the fact that Love has also done some very questionable actions. We all know Joe is a hypocrite and a piece of shit. We don't need that spelled out to us. We know that Joe treated Love horribly and you explained very well how he did so this season, and I bet all of us were yelling at our screens telling him "your soulmate is right there dumbass just stop!" That's why I didn't spend my post talking about all the bad things Joe did.

We're all so quick to call out Joe's behavior, hypocrisy, and flaws...yet Love isn't getting any sort of commentary about her own flaws and questionable actions--regardless on whether or not she's more relatable.

And, again, I did enjoy Love and I related to her on many different levels since season 2 and throughout season 3...but I'm not gonna romanticize her flaws regardless of how I personally connected with her character.

Thank you for your insight and answering my question!

[loftec]

(1) Hi loftec! i have a quick question (you don't have to answer if you don't want to!) - i'm working on my fic right now (probably never gonna post it tho, my writing is really bad, but anyway), in NTW ian has an EX (Jace? i think?) and if i'm correct he is a lot older than ian (i don't know if you ever gave us jace's age but i remember him being a lot older for some reason - maybe because mickey called him a creep and pedo at least 5 times 🤣 and it just stuck), anyway, my question is:

(2) do you have any "theory" of why ian dates older guys, and by older i mean OLDER (first Kash, then Ned), in fics he also dates "grandpas" - as mickey would call them 😂 (+ is Jace a "grandpa"? i was thinking all this time that he is, but now i'm not so sure 🤔🤔)

Hello friend!

First of all, I could talk for ages about how I think good/bad is a completely irrelevant metric when it comes to fic. I love writing fic and I mostly love the thing I am writing – I’m excited to develop the idea, to shape it into something that can be shared, and then to share it... but I still (often!) think my writing is bad. I just want to tell you that it does not matter if you feel like your writing is bad, I swear to you it isn’t. It’s maybe a first draft that you can work on, it’s maybe an idea that you can share with another person for feedback, maybe it’s just what’s on your mind right now and it is what it is and doesn’t have to be more than that. 

I think one of the most wonderful things inherent in the way we publish and consume fic, is that quality is subjective to the point of irrelevant. You are the only part of your fic that really matters; if you want to write it, write it. If you want to post it, post it.

Posting fic is a really scary thing before you’ve tried it. Then it becomes the most exhilarating thing, while still also remaining very scary. And maybe it’s not for you, you really do not need to post your fic in order for it to have value. You’re writing! That’s fantastic! But if you find yourself excited for your fic even while you still feel like it might be bad, I want you to know you’re not alone in that feeling. And the feeling might be there for a reason, but don’t let it be there just to stop you. 

Oh wow, I’ve gone off on a tangent, but! If you want me to ramble on about good vs bad, give some hot tips on posting fic, or want another pep talk, let me know. It is one of my most favourite things to talk about. 

Onto the actual ask:

This is a very interesting question and something I know I thought about a lot a few years ago when I started writing about Ian. I will try to put words to these thoughts, with a couple of caveats. Under the cut!

Most of my characterisation is based on seasons 1-5, I have kept up to date with Ian and Mickey in the later seasons, but only by reading recaps and not by watching the show myself, so... yeah, I suppose there could be more insight there, especially maybe with Caleb and perhaps also Trevor, who both were to various extents positioned to “teach” Ian something; about relationships or about his community... but like I said, I never actually watched those seasons, so I’m not really qualified to speak on that.

So!

In NTW, Jace is definitely a lot older than Ian. When they met, Ian was in his early twenties and Jace was closer to forty, and also an authority figure. 

I think an important thing to keep in mind is that we’ve only met Jace from Mickey’s unflattering POV, so far, and we only know about his and Ian’s relationship through what little Ian is willing to tell us. And Ian is maybe not the most reliable narrator when it comes to his past relationships, as I daresay most of us aren’t. Jace most certainly did a lot wrong when they were together, and he was twice Ian’s age and his teacher (which I suppose doesn’t have to mean anything bad, but you know... I don’t understand the draw of that kind of dynamic), but they were together for a reason, at some point. People are rarely all bad, or entirely to blame. Ian was drawn to Jace for many different reasons, and went back to him more than once for those same reasons. Tellingly, I’d wager that the age difference and the wonky power dynamic were not part of the reasons why Ian eventually ended it with Jace. 

And the fact that he didn’t find an issue with being with someone twice his age, probably has a lot to do with Kash.

When Ian was with Kash, I think he thought they were equals. That he thought he was an adult because his parents had left him and his siblings to take care of themselves, to provide for their family. Ian worked and had a plan for the future, he had responsibilities and dealt with them. He was mature. (And as far as we know, he also topped in his sexual relationship with Kash, which I imagine a 14 year old guy could think of as definitive proof that other people don’t know what they’re talking about when/if they question his (fully illegal) relationship with a grown-ass adult man.) Before he hooks up with Mickey, we never see Ian interested in guys his own age. We see him have sex with one or two, but never anything beyond that. At this point – when Ian is still a teenager, convinced that he’s a grown-up – I imagine that he is looking for partners who make him feel like an adult, because this is what he thinks he is, who he thinks he has to be.

Roughly the same could probably be said about Ned, although at that point Ian has experienced something else with Mickey, and maybe also wants to go back to being with someone more “secure” and more “mature”. He does a shit job trying to find it with Ned, but Ned is also 99% there for his “must make Mickey jealous somehow” ploy, so I don’t know how much we can extrapolate from his “relationship” with that guy (as you might be able to tell, I don’t like that storyline very much, to the point where I have written Ned out entirely from NTW lol).

Ahh this got long and I don’t know if it’s at all interesting or answers your question! Hope there’s something there, let me know if there’s anything that didn’t make sense, and I’m sure I can be convinced to ramble on for a bit longer.

Thanks for asking! <3

[fonulyn]

hi :) do you have any advice for new teachers? i suddenly got my first teaching position and i'm kind of freaking out O_O

ohhhh congratulations!! :D ah and try to take deep breaths and calm down, I’m sure you’ll do great! 

the advice kind of would depend on how old kids you’re teaching (if kids at all?) because it’s quite different working with the little ones and with the teenagers, so. personally I find the smaller children a little intimidating and I’m glad I work with 13-19 year olds, because I can handle them much better :’D

but in general what I find is the most important thing about being a teacher is being fair to everyone. it’s impossible to actually like everyone you teach, especially if you work with teenagers when there’s always one of two who try their best to piss you off. but you’ve still got to treat them all the same, and give everyone the same opportunities for guidance and help. they’re kids. i’m the adult. i’ve got to see past the spitting on floors and yelling at me how math sucks.

and usually the kids will notice you’re being fair and not playing favorites and they’ll respect that. 

another thing i’ve learned is that often even when you feel like screaming and stomping your foot and throwing things, the best thing can be to smile and brush it off with a joke. like... pick your battles? don’t make a huge deal out of everything, so then when you do make a big deal out of an actually important issue it then actually sticks with them. i’m not gonna yell at them for making a paper airplane out of their exam, because it’s not a huge deal. but i am going to give them a stern talking to about for example offensive and homophobic language. because i think it’s a more important life lesson for them in the end. 

most kids are really good kids. they might act tough, and act out, but in the end they’re good kids. and i love working with them. that moment when you actually get through to someone who has done nothing but give you troubles, even for a second? amazing.

some teachers have their teacher-me and private-me and that is absolutely legit, that’s valid, if you feel like you need the separation then it’s your choice. personally for me, i can’t make that distinction. i find it easiest to be myself. be as honest and as genuine as possible. it doesn’t mean i’m gonna open up about everything, god no. but like. they see when you’re particularly tired, so admitting to it usually is the better call than trying to pretend you’re not. 

i’ve gone into the classroom with red rimmed eyes after crying, and all I got was “O_O are you okay???” when i was afraid they’d make fun of me. usually when they sense it’s serious, they won’t make it worse. 

but like this is where your personality comes into play a lot? I know colleagues who are amazing teachers but who are very strict in the classroom and they need to focus on the subject at hand all the time. wherein me? i go off on a tangent all the time, we’ll talk about things that definitely weren’t in the lesson plan at all. i can laugh at myself, and i don’t mind if they laugh at me as long as it’s all in good fun and not mean. 

and if they piss me off i can honestly tell them that c’mon, you’re being little shits right now, can’t you see how there’s smoke coming out of my ears :’D usually it gets a laugh and they do behave better.

idk i just really love this job?? i’m getting all teary-eyed here thinking about all the amazing students i’ve had :’D

OH AND one thing i learned like two years into teaching; you don’t always need to have every answer at hand immediately! i used to stress about it a lot, and felt that it made me less respectable and less of a teacher if i couldn’t answer every single question they asked. i even tried to make up an answer on the spot sometimes, until i talked with my dad (who was a teacher too lmao, as was my mom), and he was all “you’re still the one who knows the most about this in the room. they won’t mind if you need to google something.”

and you know what? they won’t! nowadays if they ask me what the price for a gram of gold is I can say “i do not know. i will look it up!” and then i will inform them when i’ve acquired that knowledge. if it’s a quick search i can do it while they’re working on some assignments or whatever, if it’s a more complex topic i’ll tell them “we’ll talk about this tomorrow” and they always accept it. they always just nod and when we get back to it they’re glad they got the info they wanted.

it’s okay not to know everything. and it’s okay to admit to your flaws. in the end they will remember the countless things you did tell them without looking them up and a few “oh man i have no idea!”s in between won’t do anything. except maybe make you look more human, idk? 

and it’s good to be flexible if you can. if something you planned out for a lesson isn’t working, it’s always good to have a plan b. i once tried a different approach during a chem lesson but they hated it so we stopped halfway through and just played hangman with names of chemical compounds for a bit and it was good.

sometimes they just need an adult to be present so they can rant about something that bothers them, and if some physics has to be set aside for that? fine. we can learn newton’s third law tomorrow if today you need to talk about how our government is handling immigration.

and one important thing: go easy on yourself, okay?

not every lesson is a great lesson. sometimes it’s enough that you got them to do anything at all. sometimes nothing you plan will work out. sometimes there are lessons when everything goes wrong, no one learns anything, and all those great plans you made just flew out of the window. but it happens. move on. the next lesson will be better! the next day will look up. 

i had this one group of 14-year-olds once, and there were two kids who hated me. it took us literally three months where every single lesson was a struggle. but after that it got better. by the end of the semester, there were some absolutely great lessons too. once i had a lesson so bad i cried for fifteen minutes straight afterwards bc nothing worked out. but you know what? the next lesson for the same group was great. 

i love this job. it’s amazing. i wouldn’t want to do anything else. but there are bad days and it’s fine. it happens. don’t beat yourself up for it. talk to someone about it, or come tell me about it if it helps ;) but then move on and it’ll get better. you’re not a bad teacher if you have a bad lesson or a few.

and the good lessons? when you see how someone finally gets a particularly difficult topic? when a kid who has panicked every math lesson suddenly gets something right and gives you the biggest smile? when someone who thought they’d never pass a single math course gets through them all? i don’t think there’s anything as rewarding as that. 

and the lessons when you get to laugh with them, work with them, everything goes as you planned and they’re excited about the topic and you get to actually enjoy every second of the lesson? that’s. that’s why i do this, seriously. those lessons feel like they’re not work at all. and there are surprisingly many of them. 

have i mentioned i love this job?? because i do. 

i’m sorry i rambled so much i ...don’t know if any of this is actually good or useful advice for you?? but feel free to drop me a message anytime if you need some support!! you’ve got this! :D

[miraculous-elcie-misc]

ADD is Attention Deficit Disorder, while ADHD is Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. ADD isn't just inattentive ADHD... Both can be inattentive, or both can seem inattentive while they really just have times of hyper focus on things than other what is supposed to be the focus. (Edit: If you actually bother to read through this, you'll see that I get caught up in details that I remember that you probably don't really need or little side stories that start to move away from the story I'm trying to tell.) To me, ADD meant you struggle just as much as those with ADHD, but you aren't as hyperactive, or maybe you aren't as "everywhere" as someone with ADHD.

Here's an example from my own life: When I was a kid, I was diagnosed with ADD and my younger brother (we'll call him Ken) was diagnosed with ADHD. My older brother, Michael, and younger sister, Michelle, were also diagnosed with ADHD or ADD, but they only needed lower doses for their medications to help manage their struggles, while both my younger brother and I ended up with higher doses (54 mg for the generic for Concerta while we were in Jr high/high school).

So Ken and I, we both struggled pretty hard with our learning disabilities in school. We're about two years and 5 months apart in age, so it ended up that we were three years apart in school, so I don't really know how he was in classes, though I do know he was a lot more diligent in taking his medication and doing his homework and ended up being valedictorian of his graduating class whereas I had to complete packets and almost didn't get to walk...

Sorry, ADD moment. I tend to go on lots of tangents. Which, side note, for Ken and I, our ADHD/ADD definitely transitioned to adult ADHD (to use the more current medical terms), and it definitely manifests differently than when we were teenagers.

Anyway, so while Ken and I didn't get to see each other in school, we were both a part of our state's State Student PTSA (Parent Teacher Student Association) board along with Michael and a few other students throughout our state, less than 10 of us total. We had meetings on Saturday mornings, and I didn't typically take my medication on weekends since I liked to save it for school, and I think Ken was the same. Our meetings would take place in the state PTSA building in a room that, now thinking about it, kind of reminds me of some of my classrooms at my university—a room with a few rows of those longer folding tables that aren't very wide with folding chairs at each table—though at the front of the room was one of those tables with chairs behind it facing the rest of the room...

Anyway... So there's this one particular meeting—or maybe there was a few like this—where I don't recall anything about what was talked or who all was there aside from me, my two brothers, and our advisor, but during our hour or so meeting, Ken ended up sitting in every single, unoccupied seat. He literally couldn't sit still. This is a good example of the hyperactive part of his ADHD.

On the flip side, here's two examples of what comes to mind of my ADD, where I wasn't hyperactive at all. These aren't things I remember as much as I was told about these.

First example is from first grade when I was first diagnosed with ADD: in my class, we would be given packets to work on. I don't have any idea how many pages were in these things, but while most of my class would finish the entire packet during class, I was barely getting through any of it. My teacher noticed that I spent SO much time making sure that my colored pencils or whatever were all in order and sharp and laying straight on my desk that I wasn't getting much else done. When they diagnosed me with ADD and started me on medication, I still wasn't finishing the packets during class, but I was getting a lot more pages done.

Second example is from sixth grade and is a much less detailed example, in a way... But I think it still works? Whatever, it's fine. Anyway, so in sixth grade, I ended up failing sixth grade... ANYWAY, so in sixth grade, at my first parent/teacher conference, my mom asked why I was failing and what she could do to help me, and my teacher, without checking his papers, told her that I wasn't failing, that I was a good student who was quiet and not disruptive and answer questions when asked. My mom was apparently like, "Okay, but her report card says you gave her an F?" My teacher checked his papers and was like, "Oh, you're right. She is failing. She hasn't been turning in her homework." (I remember my mom telling me that she's pretty sure my teacher had ADD, too.)

...................

All of this is just to say that ADD, while it's not technically a proper medical term anymore, isn't just "inattentive ADHD."

Also, adult ADHD manifests differently than children with ADHD. Like, Ken's daughter, for example, she's only 4 right now, but we're pretty sure my niece has ADHD, with an emphasis on the hyperactive, just like her daddy did. Ken and I, to others who don't know that we do have ADHD, it seems like we just "get distracted" a lot.

I recently got diagnosed with ADD by my psych after a many long discussions bc the adhd specialist said i was "too smart" to have ADHD (i need to go to a specialist tester for a report as "evidence" to get diagnosed where i am from). My psych acknowledged I was ND, but didn't quite understand why I wanted it on paper as she thought my current diagnosis of depression n anxiety was enough for university accommodations. But is it right to still call it ADD? My uni is in another country and I'm going over for the next sem and Im afraid they would deem the diagnosis invalid and I wont get access to additional support like- ND support grps and a mentor program that I really would like to be part of. I'm also afraid if I go over, they would assess me again and say I don't have adhd either.

ADD is just inattentive ADHD. It's the same thing and it's only very recently they changed the term from ADD to ADHD-PI.

You definitely have ADHD!! You should definitely ask to be part of it and talk to the university! It might be something you have to opt in for!!

Good luck!!!