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saltedpeppermintmocha · 4 months ago

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MONSTERS DON’T DO BACKGROUND CHECKS - 4/?

-UFSans x Reader

Chapter One(Tumblr)

Chapter One (Ao3)

Summary: Moving across the country and starting your life anew on the basis of a rumour may not be the smartest thing you’ve ever done…but, well, you’re here.

If only you could stop running into that asshole skeleton, life would be pretty good.

Tags: underfell au, bara Sans, afab reader, enemies to lovers, fluff, eventual romance, eventual smut, slow burn, swearing, alcohol, smoking, past abuse, plot

Notes: Currently at 92k words and 13 chapters on AO3.

Chapter Four : Monsters Don't Play Video Games

1 Month Later

You are not exactly sure how it happens, but after that day you find yourself in a surprising…acquaintance-ship (?) with Sans. It’s not a friendship, not really. You’re not entirely sure what to call it. It’s not like you see him that much anyways, but when you do it’s always full of bad jokes, snark and competition.

…it’s not awful.

So, when you walk into Guy’s place for another party and see that skeleton on the couch, you don’t immediately groan and turn around. Instead, you greet him just like the other guests and head over to the kitchen to drop off your bags.

The party is smaller this time, with only a handful of guests: BP (obviously), Sans, Aaron, the dog squad and you. That particular guest list confused you at first -while they are good friends with the dogs, you get the impression that neither BP or Guy are overly close with the others- until Guy lets you know that Sans and Aaron live on the same floor and are pretty much automatically invited to any party. It’s the only way they can get away with the loud music.

A few minutes later you make your way back out to the livingroom, red solo cup of human alcohol in your hands. As usual, Dogaressa and Dogamy have overtaken the plush chair. BP, Guy and Sans somehow all fit together on the couch -though with the cat and bunny monsters practically on top of each other. Aaron sits in a kitchen chair dragged out, and Lesser Dog rolls around on the floor, chewing on a dog treat.

“Hey guys.” You say.

“Heyyy~” Aaron raises his own cup, drinking after. Woah. The guy is already well into it, huh? You chuckle and head over, settling down on the ground next comfortably. Lesser Dog immediately climbs up into your lap, yipping happily as you pet them.

Aaron is apparently in the middle of a story, so he quickly jumps back in. You remain quiet, sipping at your drink -you made it too strong, so sipping is all you can do until you get back up to mix it with more soda- and petting Lesser Dog as you try to follow along without prior context. It doesn’t take you long to determine ‘that bitch’ is his girlfriend, or…maybe ex. It’s a bit hard to tell.

The story goes on for a while, as the rest of the monsters nod along or ask questions. You’re skeptical of Aarons reliability in his story, honestly. A lot of what he claims his girlfriend has done seems…extreme…but you decide not to call him out on it. You place your cup on the coffee table and focus your attention on Lesser Dog to give some good scritches. When the dog is practically goo in your lap, you reach back up for your cup. It’s gone. Huh?

You look up, confused expression turning unimpressed quick when you see your cup in a big, bony hand. “I think you have some sort of problem.” You say. “You know, there’s no shame in getting help.”

The skeleton rolls his eye lights, bringing the cup up to his skull. You can’t tell if he takes a sip or just smells it. Huh. Can he smell? He doesn’t have a nose. Either way, he looks a bit disgusted with his decision, and goes to place the cup back down.

You grin. “What? Too much for ya?”

“this is nothin’ compared to monster shit.” Sans replies, words echoing your own from last time. “i thought ya learned that lesson last time, sweetcheeks”

Well, the reminder of your sudden drunkenness at the last party is a low blow for sure. Your lips press together as you narrow your eyes. “Okay. Prove it.”

Those red eye lights seem to grow in intensity at your words. His mouth ticks up a bit at the corner as he grabs your solo cup and brings it up to his mouth.

…he takes the entire drink like a shot.

You stare at the guy with wide eyes. Shit. You can’t even really find it in yourself to feel bested at that. The mixed emotions of impressed and confused are too much. Sure, it was maybe only three quarters full, but that was a pretty damn strong drink. You couldn’t imagine just drinking it all in one go.

Carefully placing Lesser Dog on the ground, you do an odd little shuffle on the ground to get closer to the skeleton. Sans watches you move, raising an eyebrow bone as you settle yourself close to the foot of the couch.

“Okay, probably an insensitive question, but I have to ask.” You say, voice a bit quieter. “How the hell did you do that?”

He stares down at you. “what?”

“I mean, you’re a skeleton.” You elaborate, hands moving in the air uselessly. “Shouldn’t it like…just drip through you or something?”

You can tell the moment he realizes what you’re asking. The confusion disappears, to be replaced by that familiar annoying smirk. He raises a hand in the air, wiggling his fingers lazily. “magic.”

��

You let out a sigh, throwing your hands up in the air. “Fuckin’ fine then. Don’t tell me then.”

“awe, did i hurt ya feelin’s, doll?” He chuckles.

That damn deep, smug voice sends frustration right to your core. You reach your hand out and hit his calf, the only part of him in immediate arms length. Immediately you regret it. Ow. Fuck. That hurt. Right. A skeleton. Pain radiates up your hand into your wrist. You shake it out, turning your glare back up to his face.

Sans’ is looking right back, eyebrow bones raised. “oh no.” He says, deadpan. “you’ve mortally wounded me.”

…Damnit.

You press your lips together, holding back the dumb little laugh that suddenly tries to escape. Nope, you’re not going to give him the satisfaction. Though, by the look on his face, you kinda feel like he already knows. Asshole. You look away, eyes scanning the room for a moment before landing on now-empty cup.

“Well, I better go get another drink.” A perfect escape. Truly.

You push yourself up, grab your cup and make your way back to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, you grab your soda and the liquor, placing it down on the island. You stare at it, contemplating. After accidentally putting too much in your first cup, it’s really not what you want anymore. But, well, it’s all you have.

You’re still there, sadly considering your lack of options, when your vision gets darker. Huh? You blink a few times, before things start to register. A large shadow has covered you and part of the island.

“I think stalking might be joining the list of things to get help for.” You say, turning on your heel to face the skeleton. Your arms cross in front of your chest.

Sans rolls his eye lights. “don’t flatter yerself.” He grumbles. “jus’ finished my own drink.” He definitely has an empty cup in his hand, but you could have sworn it was full just a few moments ago.

The skeleton reaches around you, grabbing a bottle from the island. You don’t move, standing your ground out of some sort of weird determination as he’s forced to move around you to mix his own drink. Hah. Suck it.

But he doesn’t seem to be bothered in the least. He easily reaches around you to put the bottle back. It's only then that he pauses, red eye lights looking down at you. “move over.” He orders. “yer right in front of the last bottle.”

An order? You press your lips together and stay strong. “Fuck off. I was here first.”

He pauses, before that grin ticks up. “what? wanna be near me that bad, sweetcheeks?” Somehow, his voice sounds even deeper. “fine.”

Sans steps forward, large body now just an inch or so away from you. Breath hitching, you naturally lean back, feeling the edge of the island behind you dig into your back. The smell of metal and smoke invades your senses, as everything outside of his body is quickly drowned out.

He doesn’t touch you, at all, actually. Instead he uses his sheer size to his advantage, caging you in to lean over you. It feels almost like time is in slow motion as his big arm moves past your head, reaching for the bottle that had inconveniently been right behind your back.

The skeleton doesn’t step back immediately once he has the bottle. Instead he looks down, taking in your surprised expression and open mouth. He chuckles, and you’re close enough to him now that you practically feel the vibration.

Finally he steps away. It’s over in only a moment, but it feels like it lasts much longer.

You feel the need to escape from whatever this situation has escalated into, but also, naturally, don’t want to leave and let him win again. So you do what any sane person would do in this situation, and try your hardest to push it out of your mind.

Sans pours the bottle into his cup and-

…what.

Suddenly, you do have something new to focus on. You jump on it quick. “Holy shit.”

Smoke. No, not smoke, magic. It swirls up from his cup, sparking in the air. Multi-coloured little fireworks. Woah. You stare, amazed.

“what’s got ya lookin’ all doe eyed an’ shit?”

You roll your eyes, but don’t take the bait. “Dude, that’s so cool!”

In your peripheral, you watch as he also looks down at his cup. “it’s just magic.”

“Uh, yeah?” You respond, matter-of-factly. “ And it’s cool!”

He snorts. “shouldn’t ya be used’ta magic by now?”

“It’s not like you guys are just going around shooting magic everywhere.” You protest, looking up. “I don’t think I’ve really seen any since I moved here.” It’s not something you’ve really considered previously, but now you feel a bit like you’ve been missing out.

“...what, really ?” The skeleton sounds completely bewildered. You just look at him, not repeating yourself. “well, shit, doll, that explains a lot.”

Huh?

Sans looks at your still-empty cup, and lets out a long breath. “fuckin' hell, i'll make ya one.”

“What?”

A bit of a longer pause, before he grumbles. “‘m not gonna offer again.”

You weigh your options. “...are all monster drinks like that?”

“when ya first mix ‘em, ya.”

…

“Yeah, okay. I’m down.”

The next ten or so minutes is…surprising to say the least. Definitely the longest the two of you have gone without some sort of dig or competition. Sans is surprisingly patient as he explains what each drink is, and its effect. Turns out the one you stole from him at the last party was fire magic. No wonder you were so hot. Huh.

He answers your questions without making you feel dumb or inferior, in a way that makes you feel he definitely has done something like this before, some sort of teaching. Maybe not in an official way -no, you can’t imagine him being an actual teacher- but the patience he shows when you ask a definitely dumb question is telling. Does he…have a kid or something? That’s a weird thought.

In the end, you end up with a drink that is a mix of magic that Sans recommends. You stare down at the liquid swirling in the cup. “...you’re not trying to kill me, right?” You ask, half-joking.

“nah.” He responds, leaning against the island. You wait, expecting there to be some sort of joke at the end of his sentence, but he says nothing else. Instead, he just looks at you expectantly.

You sip the drink, and immediately feel the familiar tingling on your lips. It’s delicious off the get-go. Then things really start going. The fire magic -as you now know- hits first, warming your body quickly as it enters your bloodstream. Almost too hot. Then the ice magic spreads. Slower than the fire magic, but just as strong. It soothes the intense heat everywhere it goes, leaving you just feeling pleasantly warm.

“look at yer hands, doll.”

Looking down at your hands, you let out a small gasp. They’re steaming?! You bring the hand not holding your cup up to your face, watching in amazement as the steam rises from your skin. But that amazement only grows as you look harder. It probably wouldn’t be too visible if you weren’t looking for it, but red and light blue magic swirls underneath your skin, almost like it’s in your bloodstream.

It’s beautiful. It doesn’t hurt at all.

“Is…this happening all over?” You look up at Sans.

“heh. yea. look.” Suddenly there is a phone in your face. You hear the recognizable click of a camera, but before you can even react, he turns it around to show you.

The very first reaction you have is embarrassment at your expression. That dumb, awed expression on your face. But it doesn’t last long. As you focus on the details, your breath actually stops. Holy shit. Your eyes are different colours. Both are a swirl of red and light blue. You can imagine that the colours move there just like they do under your skin, but much more vibrant.

You stare at the photo for a bit longer, before looking back up at the skeleton. “Thank you, Sans.” You smile widely. “Seriously, this was really cool of you.”

He blinks, leaning back slightly. It’s only because you’re so close do you notice the slight red on his cheekbones. Huh. Cool that magic affects him like that too!

“we, uh, should go back.” He says.

You agree, and the two of you make your way back out to the party. They’re still chatting as you walk up, but almost all of them pause to look over.

“Sup.” You say awkwardly, uncomfortable suddenly being the center of attention. BP looks between you and Sans as you both approach, raising an eyebrow at you. You just give a shaky smile back.

Lesser Dog whines from the floor. You take the opportunity to sit back on the ground, passing the pup a treat. Sans returns to his spot on the couch. For a moment, nobody speaks.

“UGH!” Aaron groans, tilting his head back. “You won’t believe what that bitch just texted me!”

Aaand the moment is gone. You can’t help but feel relieved that the attention is suddenly off you. You relax and let Aaron take the spotlite. Take another sip of the drink, you glance at Sans in your peripheral.

Red eye lights look back. Startling slightly, you look away.

--------------------------------------------------------

You’re almost done your cup by the time you hear your name called out by Guy. The bunny monster had disappeared into the kitchen a few minutes ago to get drinks for himself and BP.

“Yea?” You call back, hoping he doesn’t ask you to get up. You’re comfy as shit right now.

He pokes his head out from the archway, holding out the reusable bag you brought. “What’s this?”

Oh, right! Suddenly you light up. “Shit, only the best party game fuckin’ ever. Bring it over!”

Guy brings it over, setting the bag down on the coffee table with a noticeably dense plastic thump. A bit hard, but this shit is practically indestructible. With a grin, you reach in and grab something, holding it up.

The thing in your hand is a came cartridge, with a familiar green iconic figure on the front driving a go-kart.

You look around the room, expecting something other than confused expressions. The penny drops. “Oh. Oh no!” You gasp dramatically. “Am I really gonna be the one to pop all of your Luigi Kart cherries?”

“...Luigi Kart?” Guy asks.

“Mhm.” You nod, taking out the other equipment. “A video game. Kinda like a racing game but with power-ups and you can really fuck over your opponents.” A pause. “I only have four controllers though so we might have to take turns.”

“I’m in!” Guy smiles. He looks over at BP, who says nothing.

An elbow to the side later and BP sighs, letting out a quiet. “Sure, I’ll play.”

The set-up doesn’t take too long, and the first group of four to play are: Dogaressa, Dogamy, Guy and BP. All of them suck off the bat -which is expected, honestly- but catch on pretty quick. Soon you’re able to stop giving tips and tricks and just let them play.

It's funny to watch them play, even as you quickly become the only one not actively racing. Aaron leaves not too long after the first race to 'go have hatesex with his ex' apparently. Gross, and way too much information. Lesser Dog starts to get a bit whiny a few races in, so Sans agrees to take him out for a walk. You were a bit surprised that Sans of all of them offer, but Lesser Dog seems happy.

…you still don’t really understand if Lesser Dog is a monster or an actual dog.

The racers are just finishing their last race of four (with Guy easily crushing the others) when Sans and Lesser Dog enter the apartment from their walk. Lesser Dog immediately launches into you, post-walk excitement etched into his happy face. You smile and scratch him behind his ear a bit, and he's satisfied enough to lay down again.

“...what’s this?” Sans asks, walking up. Something about him seems a bit off. Hm.

“A game.” BP responds, uselessly, moving to the side to dodge Guy’s elbow as his car turns the corner.

You snort, watching the frustration grow in Sans until you decide to step in. “It’s Luigi Kart. A racing game.” A pause. “They’re just about to be done. Wanna go next?”

…

“C’mon!” You grin. “I can’t wait to wipe the floor with you.”

At that, Sans turns to you, that familiar glint back in his eye. “...yea. alright. lets go.”

The tension of competition grows in you as the other four complete their last race. Guy stands up when he’s announced the winner, cheering. BP claps quietly in the background, expression still not impressed but supporting his partner either way. Aw, they’re cute.

Dogamy and Dogaressa bow out of the next game, wanting to watch instead. BP tries to back out of going again, but is again unable to resist Guys’ pleading. You give Sans a quick explanation of the controls and most obvious power-ups, pass him a controller and start the game.

Feeling merciful, you start on an easy track. This allows Sans a moment to get used to things and you to get back in the swing of it all. By the second round, all ‘training wheels’ are off and you’re actually trying.

Those years of playing as a kid and teen really pay off when you’re able to get around the obstacles quickly and easily surpass the NPCs. Eventually it is you and Guy battling for first place. He’s surprisingly really good, almost instinctually knowing when and where to use his power-ups. You'd be suspicious that the monster lied about playing before if it wasn't Guy.

The two of you lap BP quickly. The poor cat monster has been stuck trying to get enough speed to cross a difficult part. You listen to his defeated sigh as his character fails to jump the full distance again and press your lips together, holding back the laughter.

Suddenly, Sans’ character is in front of you. You’re surprised for a moment, before you notice him being lifted back onto the track by the little cloud. Hah! You’ve lapped him too!? Unable to resist, you jab. “Thought you were good with cars and shit, huh?!”

“fuck you.” He grumbles.

“Nahh. I don’t fuck losers.” You joke back. When you don’t get any sort of snippy response, you risk a glance over. He’s too focused on the screen, large hands working surprisingly well on the small controller. It's almost like he didn't hear you. Damn. Though, his cheekbones are a bit red. He must have taken another sip of his drink.

You turn back to the screen, just in time to see Guy red-shell you. His character speeds past you. Shit!

--------------------------------------------------------

That one race costs you the win.

Guy comes in first place, with you in a close second. BP manages to DNF each race, and Sans sits somewhere in the middle. You give Guy the props he deserves after winning against a seasoned veteran, highfiving him.

After a few more rounds, the bunny monster bows out for a break and heads back to the kitchen. BP follows not long after, likely happy not to be dragged into a third round. With the dogs uh, nuzzling in the chair and BP and Guy now out of the game, you consider just ending the game. Then Sans speaks up. “again.” He grumbles.

You look over, raising an eyebrow “Awe, baby's first word?”

He levels you with an unimpressed glare, flipping you off. "another. round."

“What? Want me to absolutely destroy you again?” You tease. “I didn’t realize you were so masochistic, Sans.” Your grin widens as you watch the expressions pass through his face: surprise, embarrassment, anger and...something else you can't quite place. Okay, sure, maybe you’re pressing a little hard here, but it’s not like you have too many wins over the guy. You’re relishing the moment, taking what you can get.

Still, that doesn’t mean you’ll leave him hanging for too long. “Yeah, sure. Let me change the settings for two.”

With that, you turn to the game and start messing with the settings. It takes only a minute, before you’re starting up a new match. You switch controllers to ensure you Players 1 and 2 (he insisted on being Player 1, the ass) the correct ones and sit down beside him on the couch.

The two of you play Luigi Kart for the next hour nonstop. The only time you pause is to go get another drink, or use the bathroom. Otherwise it’s pure competition. At first, the other monsters sit and watch, amused by each of your attempts to outdo each other, but they soon get bored and do their own thing.

Sans, to his credit, does actually catch on pretty quick. Soon he’s able to match you easily, and it becomes a true game of Luigi Kart. It gets loud sometimes, as one of you red shells the other or someone is knocked off the side of the road, but…honestly, you’re having a great time. You don’t remember the last time you laughed as hard or as freely, words unfiltered as they fall from your mouth.

Sometimes you both play a little dirty. Once, as you’re trying to aim a green shell at the back of Sans’ character, he shifts his weight. The couch tilts quickly, throwing you suddenly towards him. You land against his ribcage with an ‘oof’, and your character spins off to the side. Your payback was a lot less physical. For the next game, you through any sort of honour to the side and started using the cheats you knew as a kid: the exact way to move or jump over specific parts to skip half the level. The skeleton was fuming when you won before he even made it to the third lap.

You yawn, feeling sleep starting to overtake you as you try to navigate Bowsette's Castle. Shit, this might be the last round for you at this point. Luckily, you’re on race three of four, each of you with one win. If you get this one, at least it’ll be a tie no matter what. Win one more and you’ll have complete victory. Of course, that’s what you’re going for.

It’s going well, surprisingly. Sans got hit by a Thwump early on and has been struggling in the mass of random NPC’s since. Not an enviable place to be for sure. You soar ahead unbidden by any of that, weaving between obstacles on the roof of the castle. It’s the last lap, so all you have to do is turn a corner and win.

Unfortunately, you were not watching the mini map.

A telltale sound hits your ears, and you instantly panic, sitting up straight and willing your character to go as fast as possible. “No no no no no no no!” Sans laughs beside you.

There just isn’t enough time. Your mouth drops open as the blue shell hits you, exploding your character right before the finish line.

Sans’ character goes speeding by, and his side of the split screen starts showing the ‘FINISH’ icon. Your character finally is able to move again, and is almost overtaken by an NPC before finishing in second place.

You sit back into the couch and turn to Sans. “You asshole! I can’t believe you fucking blue shelled me at the finish line! ”

He looks at you, takes in your completely flustered expression and bursts out laughing. It’s deep and loud, and surprisingly nice. “what can i say? ‘m here to win.” Sans smirks. Something about that pings oddly at the back of your mind, but you’re much too tired and woozy from the alcohol to think more into it.

“Alright then.” You sit up. “One final match. All or nothing.”

…

“yea, okay.” He nods. “let’s go.”

You press your lips together, fighting back the grin as you pick the one course you previously stayed away from. The one course you thought would be maybe a bit too mean to give anyone on their first day of playing the game -you want them to enjoy it, right?

“the fuck is this?” Sans narrows his eyes at the screen. “looks like a unicorn threw up or some shit.”

You can’t hold back the grin anymore. “Welcome, my friend, to the hell that is Rainbow Road.”

--------------------------------------------------------

Sans loses. Painfully.

The guy was barely able to stay on the course at all. You manage to fully lap him once, and have the glorious visual of his character falling off the side just as you pass the finish line for the last time. Ah, another victim of Rainbow Road. Sans lets out a frustrated sound, the controller hitting the ground at his feet.

“WINNER!” You whoop loudly, laughing with your hands in the air and legs straight out on the couch as you celebrate your win. Turning your head to your opponent, you honestly expect some sort of ‘sore loser’ expression: anger, maybe, or embarrassment, something like that. But…the look on his face is not that at all. When you turn to face him, smiling wide in victory, you find he’s already looking at you, a complicated expression on his face that you can’t quite place.

It’s only then that you notice just how warm you’re feeling. You’re not sure if it's the fire magic or just the party atmosphere, but suddenly it’s all you can think about. “I, uh, I’m gonna go get some air.”

Sans' only response is a shrug. You slide off the couch and head towards the balcony doors, the sound of your character's victory chant in the background. Reaching the sliding doors quickly, you pull them open and immediately step out onto-

...

Oh.

Oh shit.

Your eyes go wide. BP has Guy pressed up against the brick wall, mouth on his neck and hands places you definitely don’t want to see. The next few seconds feel almost in slow motion as both monsters instantly notice your sudden appearance, turning to look at you. Guy’s face goes dark in a full blush and he starts stammering. BP just narrows his eyes, annoyance at the interruption extremely evident in the daggers he’s shooting at you from them.

“Shit- I’m so sorry!” You start speaking the moment your brain registers what you've walked into. “I-uh, I’ll go back inside!”

But, apparently, the moment is already ruined. Guy firmly pushes BP backwards so he can stand up straight. “N-no don’t worry about it!” His voice is a stammer, entire body tense in panic and embarrassment as he tries to adjust his clothing. "We shouldn't have been- I mean, we're the hosts!" A pause, as his eyes desperately look around for a way out of this situation. "Thats right. I gotta uh, go host now!"

With that, the bunny monster quickly leaves the balcony, brushing by you in his rush back into the apartment. The sliding door closes behind him with a click, leaving you and BP in a very heavy, very awkward silence.

You suck in air through your teeth and look over at your friend. “Fuck. Sorry!” You wince at his unimpressed look. “Didn’t mean to cockbl-" You change your phrasing as his look intensifies. "-uh, interrupt your thing going on…uh I can go get him…if you want?” You wave your hands in the air as you speak. “Just, uh, wait here. I’ll go get-”

BP lets out a groan, raising a hand to rub at the bridge of his nose. "Just shut up."

“Yup.” You nod immediately. “Shutting up now.”

He turns to lean against the railing, and the two of you fall into a small silence. Of course, that only lasts a few minutes. Even the you in a normal state of mind would have difficulties being completely quiet about what you just saw, and you are definitely not in a normal state of mind right now, too hyped up on monster alcohol and excitement. BP barely has the time to light a cigarette before you join him by the railing, reaching over with your hand in a fist.

“The fuck is that?” He looks down at your fist.

You offer a cheesy smile. “It’s uh, props?”

“...for what?” His gaze goes back up to you, suspicion obvious.

Damn, your cheeks are in pain from the effort it’s taking to hold back a grin. “For bagging a cutie like that?”

…

“Awe, c’mon BP!” The grin comes out. “Let’s not make this more awkward. And it’s true, right?”

A long-suffering sigh, and he reaches over to fist bump you. Fuck yea! When he rolls his eyes and turns away to look back over the balcony, you spot a little almost smug smile on his face. Hah. You don’t press it, not now anyways. Tomorrow is fair game though.

The two of you stay there in peaceful silence for what feels like a long time. You smile at the feeling of soft, cool air on your cheeks and look off into the darkness of Monstertown through half-lidded eyes. The cat monster beside you leans further against the railing than you’d ever have the guts to do, letting out a deep breath of air. Smoke drifts from his lips and swirls in the air, making unnatural patterns before disappearing entirely.

It kinda reminds you of the last time you were out here, albeit with a different monster. You tap the pad of your finger against the railing in a little tune, soft enough to not disturb your companion. Tonight has been…surprisingly fun with him. Huh. Weird. Maybe its actually possible for the two of you to get over your fucked up first meeting...hm...

When BP finishes his cigarette, you both head back inside.

--------------------------------------------------------

With a groan, you’re suddenly affronted by consciousness.

Opening your eyes, you blink up blearily at an unfamiliar ceiling. Normally something that would bring with it some sort of panic, but you feel much too comfortable and safe for anything like that. As you blink, you look around as much as you can without actually physically moving your head.

Hm. It’s Guy’s livingroom. So, you’re on the couch?

…you fell asleep here, huh.

Normally you wouldn’t do that. Letting your eyelids fall closed, you try to remember how the party ended.

….

Your eyes open.

Did you…doze back off? Damnit. Letting out a small, disgruntled sound, you reach up to rub at your face and will yourself to wake up just a bit more. This time you keep your eyes open as the fuzzy memories start to come back.

The rest of the party had been more chill, but fun nonetheless. When you and BP walked in from the balcony, you practically dragged him to the kitchen and asked him to help you make another monster drink. The cat monster was extra grumbly -‘why the fuck do i have to do work in my own fucking house’- but caved in after not too much persuading -’pleaase? I really don’t know what i’m doing. what if I fuck up? you could end up with a dead human on your hands. you don’t want that, right?’.

With a drink in your hand and two in his, you both made your way back out to the livingroom. He passed one to Guy on the couch before plopping down beside him. Sans is still on the couch, but the dogs had left. That should have been your cue to leave too, right? But you were a few sips into an incredibly tasty drink and were riding high on the great atmosphere in the room. So instead you just took the chair they had left and got comfortable.

The next little bit was mostly you all just talking and listening to music. You did notice that Sans seemed a lot more chatty than before, which was a welcome surprise. Maybe the drinks had finally starting to get to him too.

At some point, Sans plugged his phone into the speaker and the music changed. While Guy and BP had some sort of soft rock something on, this was definitely more heavy. It was good. Really good. You let the others conversation fade into the background as you sip your drink and focus on the music.

And well…that’s about it, really. You don’t remember anything else.

“I can’t get rid of you even after hours.”

You blink, returning from your memories to the present and look back up. Oh. BP. The cat monster is leaning over the back of the couch, looking down at you.

“The second you let me meet Guy, you were done for.” You concede with a sleepy smile. “Now you’re stuck with me. Hah! Sucker.”

“Guess so.” BP sighs, sounding like he’s just agreed to torture rather than a friend, and straightens up. “There’s breakfast in the kitchen.”

You look up at him. “...wait, really?”

He shrugs. “Guy made it.”

Suddenly you feel fully awake. “Oh I’m in!” You sit up…or you try to. The blanket on top of you is tangled in pretty much all of your limbs. The fuck, were you doing jiu-jitsu in your sleep or something?! Quickly, you struggle to free yourself from the blanket. A bit too quick, maybe, as you lose your balance and slide off the side of the couch, hitting the ground with a soft ‘oof’.

BP snorts. “Fucking smooth.”

“Shut up!” You try to ignore what just happened and push yourself up to your feet (of course the blanket easily comes off now ). “Your cutie made breakfast. I’m excited, okay?!”

He rolls his eyes, and disappears into the archway leading to the kitchen. You want to follow him immediately, but a different need calls. After finishing up in the bathroom, you take a moment to fix your hair in the mirror and collect your phone from the livingroom -it’s almost noon, what the fuck- before finally making your way into the kitchen.

The scene you walk into is domestic as fuck. Guy is at the stove, flipping what looks like some very fluffy pancakes. BP stands beside him, side leaning against the counter, chatting quietly as he cuts up some fruit. With both of them shrouded in the soft morning light…it’s absolutely adorable.

“Good morning.” You announce your arrival, not that you really needed to. Both monsters were already in the middle of turning to face you.

“Morning!” Guy smiles. “I hope you slept well? I know the couch isn’t the best but there wasn’t really anywhere else to put you..."

“I slept fine, don’t worry.” You smile. “Thanks for the blanket! It was really comfy."

“Oh that wasn’t me, that was B-” Guy stops speaking suddenly as the cat monster puts a paw on his arm. He looks over, and the two of them seem to share an entire conversation through their eyes. Impressive. When Guy looks back up, his expression is slightly exasperated. “Uh, nevermind. Do you want some pancakes? I know it’s a bit late for them-” He looks over at the clock on the oven. “-but, uh, I thought it would be nice.”

“I’d love some.” You nod. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

BP raises an eyebrow. “Wow, that’s a surprise.” You flip him off.

“Hm, yea, actually.” Guy nods. “Can you grab a few more plates from the cupboard over there? I didn’t grab enough.”

So you grab the plates and help out however possible. Soon enough the three of you are sitting at the little kitchen table eating the fluffiest pancakes you’ve ever had the pleasure of putting in your mouth. You tell Guy that too, in that exact wording. Maybe not the best idea, as the poor bunny blushes darkly again, but you don’t regret it.

Conversation flows easily between you. It’s going well. Almost too well, really. So when both Guy and BP’s phones go off in tandem, you’re not really concerned. It’s probably just a group text or something. You don’t even consider that anything could be wrong until you clock the sudden silence. Looking back up, you frown when you notice that their faces have dropped entirely. Guy's ears are droopy, and BP's are practically flattened to his head.

“Uh…” You start. “Is…everything okay?”

Guy glances up at you, before quietly passing you his phone over the table. You take it, and watch how he leans into BP a bit. You look down at the phone.

BREAKING NEWS: MONSTERS DENIED THE RIGHT TO MARRY

Oh. Oh fuck.

Glancing back up at the two monsters across the table from you, your heart hurts. Why the fuck were monsters denied this?! Swallowing, you look back down at the phone and read the small article. At the bottom is a video. You hit play.

It’s a press conference. At the podium is…oh. It’s that tall, scary looking skeleton again. For a moment you struggle to remember the name. Was it Papaya or something? But then his name flashes at the bottom of the screen. Papyrus. Right.

It’s a livestream of the press conference, evidently. BP and Guy watch the same thing from the cat monster's phone across the table.

The skeleton speaks, voice loud in the mic. “Yes! We Are Going To Appeal The Ruling!”

The crowd chitters amongst itself, before someone else speaks. “As I understand it, Monsterkind didn't have marriage underground.”

“You Are Correct, Human. We Did Not Have A Traditional Human Marriage Underground.” Papyrus responds. “But We Had Something…Similar!”

“Then why do you want to use our marriage? Can’t you do your own thing?!” Someone else calls out from the back. “Your kind doesn’t even believe in God!” Wow, 'your kind'? That’s fucking rude.

“There Are Legal Rights Associated with Marriage Aboveground That We, As Citizens, Are Entitled To.” Papyrus answers.

The conference ends quite shortly after, as the next few questions deviate from the legal aspects and implications of marriage and into religion. As the livestream ends, the kitchen is plunged into silence.

Well…fuck.

[Previous Chapter]

[Next Chapter]

#mocha writes #sans x you #sans x reader #underfell sans x reader #underfell fanfic #underfell!sans #underfell sans #underfell fanfiction #ufsans x reader #ufsans x you #uf!sans x reader #uf!sans #sans au #underfell sans x you #underfell sans x y/n

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saltedpeppermintmocha · 4 months ago

Text

MONSTERS DON’T DO BACKGROUND CHECKS - 3/?

-UFSans x Reader

Chapter One(Tumblr)

Chapter One (Ao3)

Summary: Moving across the country and starting your life anew on the basis of a rumour may not be the smartest thing you’ve ever done…but, well, you’re here.

If only you could stop running into that asshole skeleton, life would be pretty good.

Tags: underfell au, bara Sans, afab reader, enemies to lovers, fluff, eventual romance, eventual smut, slow burn, swearing, alcohol, smoking, past abuse, plot

Notes: Currently at 87k words and 12 chapters on AO3.

Chapter Three: Monsters Don’t Lose Bets

You are not at all hungover the next day; no headache, no nausea, nothing. Maybe you’re a bit dehydrated, but after last night that’s just a small consequence. It’s a relief really, considering your early shift, but also super fucking weird. What you are, however, is absolutely exhausted. So you stand at the reception desk feeling like a zombie and stare into space.

It’s too early in the morning for any guests to arrive, so it’s just you and the janitor in the lobby. The janitor -some sort of gooey monster that makes just as much of a mess as he cleans- hasn’t exactly been receptive to your attempts to chat. You’re starting to think it's more that he doesn’t speak at all than anything else, as ever since the monster staff got the fifteen minute break, your area has been practically sparkling and if there’s ever a mess, he’s right there.

You watch him work absently, and with nothing else interesting to focus on, your tired mind starts to relive the party. Damn. Such a weird night. A good night, for sure, filled with a lot of laughter and fun. You definitely made a few more friends, which is a great thing for your social life in Monstertown. But, there were definitely some odd moments too: walking home with Undyne, sharing your lighter with Sans on the balcony and…well, whatever the fuck happened in the kitchen.

As the memories play in your mind, you feel like almost cringing into yourself. What the hell had you been thinking?! Many of the shitty decisions you made last night definitely wouldn’t have been made if you were sober. Okay, sure, you might have gone up to Sans and tried to mess with him a bit at work, but that is nothing near to actively antagonizing him and putting your hands on him. Not to mention drinking out of a random solo cup? Just how invincible do you think you are?! Who knows what the fuck was in there?! Sure, it turned out alright…but it easily couldn’t have.

You swallow, mind going off in a tangent of ‘what could have happened’. As much as you want to completely trust BP and Guy, you’ve only known them for a few months, and you literally just met the other monsters at the party. You were lucky, really. Lucky that either nobody wanted to hurt you, or do anything worse.. BP’s words from earlier flicker through your brain.

“You have no idea just how lucky you are, little buddy.”

Letting out a long sigh, rubbing your face as you try to push your circling thoughts from your brain. No. You’re definitely going a bit too far in the other direction now. Sure, you made some dumb decisions…but that doesn’t mean anyone was necessarily out to get you. You’re allowed to trust in people. You have to be a bit smarter in the future, but you don’t want to close yourself off to people. That’s not going to happen again. You came here to live , not to become a damn hermit.

Something that Undyne said on the walk home sticks out in your mind.

“Wait. Did you really not do a lot of research before moving here?”

You really are walking around here with blinders on, aren’t you? When you moved to Monstertown, you didn’t really do much research, other than basic etiquette and where to apply for a job. It had felt odd to you to look into any specific monsters in the area…considering everything. The only monsters you really knew beforehand were Mettaton and the monarchs, but, well, everyone knows them.

Pressing your lips together, you open up Goggles on your work computer. Chandace wont really care. You type in ‘Undyne’ and hit search.

Wow. Her face pops up immediately, along with a Wiki page. You stare down at the computer in surprise. So, you really should have known who she was beforehand, then? Shit. Is she famous or something? You click on the wiki page. The page that comes up is not huge by any means, but the information on there is shocking.

Undyne (birthdate unknown) is a known monster, currently serving as the Captain of the Royal Guard, under its king, Asgore.

Well, shit. You click on the link for ‘Royal Guard’

The Royal Guard are an elite group of monsters dedicated to defending monsterkind and protecting the King and Queen.

Your hand shakes a bit. That’s who you were walking home with?? Likely one of the strongest monsters? The damn Captain of their Royal Guard?!

…no wonder Sans seemed a bit worried to see her at the party.

According to the Royal Guard page, most of the members are still active, but only a few are ‘known’ outside of monster society. A small section below is titled ‘Notable Royal Guards’. There are only a few names there: Greater Dog, Papyrus and RG02.

Greater Dog…?

You think of Lesser Dog at the party. The little pup who cuddled in your lap and whined for treats. There is no way…right? The same part of you that kept you from doing research beforehand screams at you not to look any further; you wouldn’t want people looking into you, right? But…well…last night proved that you maybe need just a bit more information if you want to live here unscathed.

You click on the link, and prepare yourself for heartbreak. The page that comes up is both a relief and a concern. That’s definitely not Lesser Dog, thankfully, but the fact that you are now staring at a picture of a different dog in really buff knights armor remains confusing as hell. How does that even work?? There isn’t much of a bio for Greater Dog, it just states the name and that they are a member of the Royal Guard.

Deciding to think a bit less of that, you go back to the previous page and click on an unknown name.

That's…a skeleton. Huh. Well, definitely not Sans. This monster is tall like Sans, but definitely a lot thinner. He’s, uh, actually kinda terrifying looking, with the scars over his eye and scowl in every photo. It’s kinda like taking a photo of Sans into photoshop and just sharpening him 100%. Are they related? Hm. You blink. Wait…is it, uh, speciesist to assume the skeletons are related? Shit.

This monster, Papyrus, has a much bigger bio than Greater Dog, or even Undyne really. Apparently this thin skeleton is also a…lawyer? Well, he'd certainly intimidate you in a court. Hah. He seems to be the main lawyer at all the different Monster Rights court cases, defending and advocating for monsterkind and the monarchs. Even his picture at the top right is him in court, standing straight up at the podium pointing at something out of frame.

From there, you kind of end up on a bit of a deep dive into monster rights. You’re surprised to find out that monsters don’t legally have everything yet: the right to marry, the right to vote, the right to own land outside of Ebott, etc. You really had thought that they were much closer. Guys’ comment on monsters being unable to buy alcohol rings a bit differently now. Shit, it seems like even the smallest thing is a fight for them.

Eventually, a guest does come up to the reception desk, so you have to exit your search. As usual, the moment one guest comes, they all do. It’s never in a nice, even fashion. So, you are busy for hours. Ugh. It does die down a little bit after noon, so you pop into Chandace's office and let her know you're going on break. The hand monster looks busy at her desk, and just waves a finger at you silently -you still haven't really figured out her motions- so you shrug and assume thats a 'go ahead.

On your break, you take a walk through the park, hoping the fresh air will help calm your mind. As you turn the corner, your eyes immediately focus on the spot that you were humiliated for the second time with mustard. If I had a nickel for every time I embarrassed myself over a condiment I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but its weird that it happened twice. Luckily, the area is empty: no stand and no skeleton. You don’t think you’ve seen the guy or stand return to the park since.

The memories of last night's actions come back full-force. You slow to a halt and look up at the sky. Even taking away the riskiness of your actions, they were still embarrassing as hell. Rude too. Shit. Should I apologize? Despite being an asshole, he dealt with some random human stealing his alcohol and putting their hands on him pretty well. He had plenty of opportunity and motive to hurt you, and also noticeably didn't push you off the balcony. And if the skeletons are in any way related, Sans could have friends/family/something in high places.

Letting out a deep breath, you look back in front of you and resume walking. An apology might be taking it too far, especially considering the guy still is an asshole. But, neutrality maybe? That could be good. Hm.

You think about that a bit as you walk back towards MTT Resort. As it starts to loom above you, you find yourself slowing. It’s such a nice day, and you really don’t want to go back. Unfortunately, you do have to work to live and too soon you are at the door to the building. You take in one last breath of fresh air before grabbing the handle to go back inside.

“Hey! Punk!” A familiar voice.

You pause, looking around. It’s Undyne. Captain of the Royal Guard , Undyne. Shit. She’s marching towards you. You immediately freeze, mind focusing on things you’d rather not: her muscles, her sharp teeth, the obvious strength she has in every movement, and the way she could easily disembowel you. All the fun stuff.

“Uh, hi Undyne!” You smile, words maybe a bit shakier than intended.

The monster stops in front of you, narrowing her eyes. Then, she smirks. “You looked me up, didn’t you?!” When you just nod sheepishly, she laughs loudly, hands on her hips. “You know, if I wanted to kill you, I definitely would have done it last night. Not now-”

Okay…true. That makes you calm a bit.

“-not that anyone here could stop me-”

Great.

“-I mean, you’re just one weak little human. The fuck would you do to stop me?!”

…

“You little shits have nothing. No magic, no claws, no muscles-” She rants, her eye a bit unfocused, as if she’s not even seeing you, but others.

“Undyne.” You interrupt, watching as her gaze immediately locks back on you. Spooky. “That’s, uh, really not really helping right now.”

“Hah! Right.” She grins, and you get the feeling that she definitely enjoys that she’s freaked you out. “Anyways, yes, I wanted to ask you something!”

…

Oh, she’s not continuing. You prompt. “Uh, go ahead?”

“Let’s exchange numbers.” Undyne commands, not asks. She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a phone, hitting a few buttons before shoving it towards you expectantly. Pinned under that gaze and feeling incredibly like prey, you really don’t have another choice. Taking the phone from her hand, start to add your contact information.

“Undyne!” A new voice calls. Looking up, you’re surprised to find the voice coming from a smaller voice further away: a yellow lizard looking monster with glasses.

“Aw, shit.” Undyne mutters, a weird nervous energy to her all of a sudden. She practically shoves the phone back into your hands. “Gotta go! I’ll text you. You better text back.”

…and she’s off. As quickly as she came. You watch as she quickly makes her way over to the other monster before stopping beside. The lizard monster turns to look at you for a moment, but with the distance and those large glasses, you have no idea what expression they have. You give a small awkward wave, but the monster turns away.

The two walk off. You watch them until they disappear around a corner and head back into the resort. You head back to the reception desk. It’s maybe half an hour later when your phone vibrates.

New Message

[Unknown Number] Hi Punk!!!!!!

With a small smile, you quickly add her contact in and respond.

[You]: Hi Undyne : )

[Undyne]: It’s Undyne

[Undyne]: The fuck?!!!! How did you know????!

You chuckle, and respond.

[You]: Lucky guess.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

2 Weeks Later

Undyne proceeds to message you at least once a day after that. It’s surprising, not just in how chatty the fish monster is, but as to how mundane the topics are. They are pretty surface level; she mostly chats about her day, asks about yours or goes on surprisingly sweet rants about her girlfriend. You had wondered at first, if her getting your number was some odd attempt to get information or something out of you. Not that you had any information that couldn’t be found online. But the idea that Undyne, Captain of the Royal Guard, just wanted to chat seemed…impossible.

Why talk to you ? You have no idea. Certainly there must be more interesting people around her. Despite thinking about it for a long while, you can’t really come up with any reason why the Captain would want anything to do with you. Part of you wants to just ask, but the larger part doesn’t want the answer. Even if you are right, and she really is trying to get something from you…you’re not certain that you really care.

After all, you’re getting something from this too. You’re getting a type of interaction that you didn’t realize you were missing. It’s just…nice to talk to someone like this. BP isn’t one for small talk, and you realized quickly that you didn’t actually get any of the other monster’s numbers at the party. But here is someone who is just willing to chat. You wonder if, maybe, this could grow into some sort of friendship. A transactional friendship, possibly, but one nonetheless.

Sort of friends with the Captain of the Royal Guard. Holy shit.

It’s been about two weeks since the night of the party, and honestly, you have pretty much moved on from it. Of course, remembering your stupidity will always bring back a pang of embarrassment, but with your new lease on life to be smarter, the odd texting with Undyne, and no skeleton sightings, you really haven’t had a reason to relive the memories anymore.

So, when you’re wandering around alone at the park on your break, and you see a familiar stand set up, you are pretty surprised.

There he is, as massive as usual. He looks almost asleep, leaning against his hand on the stand with his eye sockets practically closed.

…

Shit. What was your plan here again? To somehow become neutral with this monster? To try to smooth things over and not be on his bad side? Right. And how the hell did you plan to do that? Taking in a small breath, you text the only two people you think could have any input into this situation.

[You]: Hey, Sans is back at the stand. Should I go try to smooth things over with him?

Copy. Paste. Now just wait.

The responses come surprisingly quick, your phone vibrating twice in your hand.

[BP]: what? Fuck no

[Undyne]: Of course!!!! Don’t be a little bitch!!!! Be strong and forward!!!!

Well, cool, that was useless. You pocket your phone with a deep sigh. Okay, think. Do you even want to smooth things over with the guy? Eh. Maybe? It certainly would make living here easier, especially as he seems to be a regular around the area. Though, hypothetically, you probably could just try to avoid him for the foreseeable future. There’s no reason you have to interact with the skeleton. Maybe you can just…leave him alone and let things simmer down.

…no, that’s dumb. You’d be setting yourself up for a harder time for no reason.

You look back over to the stand, startling slightly as you notice those eye lights staring straight back at you. Oh. He’s awake. His mouth ticks up into a grin, and you instantly have to fight off the urge to flip him off. This is going well already. You think sarcastically.

You take in a deep breath to center yourself. Okay. You’re going to do this. You are going to have a good -or at least neutral- interaction with the skeleton if it kills you! Maybe it’s a good thing that he showed up today of all days. You had been planning on buying a quick lunch from the Emporium on the way back from your walk -the last of your groceries had been used for dinner last night- so you are pretty hungry. Maybe it’s finally time to try one of those locally famous ‘dogs.

Swallowing your pride, you approach the stand.

“back for another?” The skeleton asks, not moving from his lazy stance.

Shit. You forgot just how much seeing this guy's skull and hearing his voice immediately puts you on edge. Ugh, this isn’t fair.

“Can I have a ‘dog?” You ask, attempting a polite voice and even a small smile. Hah! Success!

…

The skeleton seems fully awake now. His eyes are fully opened, giving you a surprised look that you don’t fully understand.

“Uh…hello?” You prompt, using your best customer service voice. Don’t fail me now.

The grin returns, and he looks as if he’s figured something out. Uh oh. “arn’t ya missin’ somethin’?” He drawls. What? When you give him a confused look, he continues. “an important part of a request.”

It takes you only a moment for his words to click. Immediately you feel your back straighten. Oh, fuck you fuck you fuck you. “Please.” You say through gritted teeth.

“sure, since ya asked so politely.” He chuckles, reaching into his cart for the food. “lemme guess, lotsa mustard?”

“Just the regular amount.” You grumble.

He thankfully remains silent as he puts together the ‘dog. It only takes a moment, and soon he’s holding out a normal-looking hotdog with a normal amount of condiments. You can’t help but feel a bit suspicious as you take it from him. Staring at it for a moment, you take a small bite.

Oh. Shit. Everyone was right.

The flavour immediately hits your tongue. It’s good. Really good. Better than any hotdog has the right to be. Must be the magic. Letting out a small sound, you take another bite.

“ya really like that ‘dog, huh?”

You look back up, catching his amused expression. Shit. Heat fills your cheeks and you flip him off, swallowing the bite in your mouth. Well, the attempt at smoothing things over is officially ruined. You’re already resorting to your own ways. “Fuck off. Who wouldn’t like a good ‘dog?!”

He hums, leaning back on the stand. Those eye lights look you up and down.“im more of a pussy guy myself.”

…uh, what?! You stare at him, feeling like an electric shock goes down your spine. The fuck?! The moment only lasts a second longer, as that intense look leaves his eyes, his grin sharpens and he points down at the sign.

You follow his pointing finger, reading the sign. On the sign, just underneath ‘dog is… ‘cat.

….

Hot cat.

…

Shit. The sharp sound that forces its way out of your mouth is a surprise, and the continued sound even more so. That dumbass joke hits you probably much harder than normal due to the ridiculousness of the entire situation. With your free hand, you cover your mouth, trying to stifle the unexpected sound.

Sans stares at you, also apparently not expecting that reaction. It takes you only a moment or so to get yourself under control, and your laughs turn into an awkward cough. You look back up at that pleased expression and for once don’t feel the urge to escalate the situation at all. In fact, now is probably a good time to leave.

“Uh, well, I gotta go back.” You mumble, starting to step away when you remember. “Oh shit. How much is it?”

“two.”

Well, that’s reasonable enough. You reach into your purse with your free hand and grab a two. It’s only as you’re passing it into his -massive wtf- outstretched hand when something else pops into your mind. “Wait. Did you really up-charge me eight for mustard?!”

That smug look returns. He shrugs. “well, ya paid it.”

“Fuck.” You mutter, dropping the money into his hand. “I guess I did.”

There is a moment of silence as he slides the money into something on his side of the cart. “Anyways, uh, thanks for the ‘dog.” You say. “So, yeah…bye then.” What the hell was that?!

“bye, sweetcheeks.”

You give him one last glance before walking away. The nickname surprises you. Not that he said it, but that it didn’t feel like an insult this time. This time felt...different.

The ‘dog is half-way gone by the time you reach MTT resort. You walk in and head straight to the Emporium. Even if you’re not buying something, you plan to spend the second half of your lunch there with the cat monster. You don't have enough snark in your life, apparently.

“Why even ask me?” BP mutters as you walk up to the counter.

“Huh?”

He looks down at your ‘dog. Oh…

“Uh, sorry?” You smile sheepishly. “But you were right! They’re really good!”

“...did you smooth things over at least?”

You blink. Did I? Honestly, you’re not too sure. At the very least, the end of the conversation wasn’t horrible, you think. You do feel better than before.

“Uh, maybe.” You mutter. “But anyways, enough about that! Any other monster food you think I need to try?”

The cat monster gives a long-suffering sigh, and allows you to change the topic.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

1 Week Later

Sans doesn’t return.

It’s not that you think you have any sway in the skeleton's life, really, but something about the last interaction had you fully believing he’d show up more often. So when you walk into the park and see no stand day after day, you can’t help but be surprised. It gets to the point where you ask BP about it, but the cat monster only gives you an odd look and asks why you even care. You…don’t have an answer to that.

Why do you care? Why are you looking? Why does it even matter? You’ve already done your job of trying to make things as smooth as possible with the guy. Honestly, you’re not entirely sure it can be anything more neutral with both of your personalities. The last interaction showed that. So, now you can just go about your business as normal.

…maybe this is the universe telling you to just mind your own business and move on.

Which, fair enough universe, you agree. So, you actively stop looking at the spot where the stand was when you walk through the park, refuse to think about the party or the damn joke or the way he said ‘sweetcheeks’ and just…move on.

Life goes by normally: you work, snark with BP and text with Undyne. The fish monster has gone back to Ebott, but continues to text you every day. It’s been almost a month now, and the topics remain surprisingly normal. You find yourself really starting to hope that she doesn’t have any underlying plans. God, you’ll feel like such an ass if she does.

Another person you get to text now is Guy, which is exciting. The bunny monster is always such a delight. It took a while to get his number, you had to practically jump in on BP’s phone call with Guy to get it. While the cat monster was quick to get the phone back and hold it above his head, he wasn’t quick enough to cover the microphone. Once Guy knew you wanted his number, BP pretty much had no choice.

You were smug about that little victory for most of the week.

So, yea, life is going remarkably smoothly. Which, of course, is when something has to change.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

You’re at work, as usual.

It’s a hot day outside, which normally doesn’t bother you -it's nearing the end of summer, so you’ll take whatever heat you get- as MTT Resort has great temperature controls. It’s probably necessary due to the different needs of the guests. So, normally, even if it’s hot as hell outside, you’re safe and cool here. But not today. Not today, when the air conditioning is down. Not when the entire building feels like it’s melting. Not when guests are almost planning a revolt, and honestly you’re right with them.

“It feels like I’m back in Hotland!” The monster in room 402 screams at you through the phone. You grimace and hold the phone a bit further from your ear.

“Yes, I understand.” You reply. “We’ve called someone to fix it. They will be here soon.” You look at the front door. Please be here soon!

After another few minutes of ranting and you are able to hang up. Shit, it’s times like this you wish the monsters were still too shocked to speak with you. Ugh. You take another sip of -sadly lukewarm by this point- water and wipe at the sweat on your forehead. This fucking mechanic can’t come soon enough.

As if you summoned someone, the front door opens. You straighten up, leaning forward as you wait for whoever it is to come in. Please be the mechanic. Please be the mechanic. Please!!

…

The fuck?! In walks probably the last person you expected to see right now. You blink a few times in confusion as the large skeleton walks in through the door.

Sans looks just as you remember him, even still wearing that damn jacket -which… how?! He looks around the lobby lazily for a moment, before his eye lights land on the reception desk. He seems to almost straighten up, heading your way.

“The fuck have you been?” The words are out of your mouth the moment he walks up.

He grins. “what? miss me?”

“Absolutely not.” You deadpan. “I was just wanted some pussy.” The words are out of your mouth before you even get to think of them. Your eyes go wide, and your cheeks turn red… i’ll blame that one on the heat.

The skeletons' eyes also widen at your words, and he lets out a loud laugh. It surprises you, along with a few monsters milling about in the lobby area who had started to look a bit concerned. “fuckin’ hell, sweetcheeks, ya really don’ got a filter, do ya?”

“Shut up.” You grumble, rubbing at your cheeks and willing the red to go down. I really do! Just…not around assholes like you, apparently. You don’t speak your thoughts. After a moment, the laughter dies down.

“So, uh, what are you doing here?” You ask, changing the topic. ”Not gonna lie, it’s kinda hell in here right now. The air conditioner’s down.”

He raises an eyebrow bone. “im gonna fix it. what’s it look like?”

You blink. “Uh. You??”

“the fuck does that mean?” He frowns, tensing. You can practically see his metaphorical hackles rising. Ah. Shit. Yup. That was definitely insulting.

“No, sorry!” You raise your hands up in a placating gesture. “I meant that you work at the hotdog stand. There doesn’t seem to be many uh…transferable skills?”

His shoulders drop. Crisis averted. “nah. that’s my side gig.” Huh?

“Side gig?” You ask. “So…your main job is…”

“a mechanic.” Sans shrugs. “cars, motorcycles, hvac, generators, elevators…anythin’ mechanical anyways.”

“Oh.” You reply, surprised. “That's…pretty cool.”

“Sans, you’re here. Finally.” Chandace pops her…fingers out of the door, interrupting whatever the skeleton was about to respond with. Shame, because the look on his face is something you’ve never seen before. The expression clears quickly, as he turns towards Chandace.

“yup.”

Chandace sighs. “Follow me.”

The two monsters leave without another word, Sans following Chandace down the hall towards the back rooms. You stop watching as they round a corner, turning back towards the lobby. Oh. Uh… The few monsters in the lobby stare at you. You’re used to the staring, of course, but something about this feels different.

The phone rings, you’re saviour from this weird moment. You quickly reach down and pick it up. “Thank you for calling MTT-”

“IS IT FIXED YET?!” A voice screams at you loudly through the receiver.

You look at the Caller I.D: room 402. Damnit!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

It takes a long time before anything changes. Long enough that you answer two more calls from room 402. Long enough that the heat in the lobby becomes almost unbearable. Long enough that you say ‘fuck it’ to whatever Chandace is going to say and start figuring things out on your own.

Not that you can do much, exactly. Your break might be coming up but you know better than to leave early with Chandace still in the backrooms. No, you have to wait here. All you can do is work with what you currently have, and what you have is a professional long-sleeved shirt and long pants. With one last look around the -quite empty- lobby, you start peeling it off, grimacing as the sweaty skin underneath is exposed to air.

It feels a bit weird to be shirtless in the lobby, but you’re wearing a sports bra underneath -thank god for laundry day. It’s a nice sports bra, and has quite a long band at the bottom. It’s fine, practically like a cropped tank top or something. Chandace can kiss your ass if she tries to write you up for this. Next, you roll up the bottom of your pants as much as possible.

Well…it’s something.

The very few monsters in the lobby give you wide-eyed looks as you fix your clothes, but don’t say anything. They look away once you stare back at them. Otherwise, it’s business as normal. You still don't feel good in the heat, but it’s slightly better than before at least.

Maybe thirty minutes later, a mechanical sound echoes through the walls in the lobby. You startle slightly, looking around. As you listen, you start to hear the whirring sound of the air conditioning blades in the vents. Oh my god, I feel like crying. Not that you feel anything right away, in a room this big it’ll take a while before the temperature actually starts changing. Hopefully the rooms will be a bit quicker for some of the guests.

You call Room 402 and let them know the air conditioner is back up -as requested. The guest is suddenly extremely kind and soft spoken, to the point that you start to wonder if you’re calling the right room. You check the caller I.D two times before just shrugging and letting it be.

It’s as you are hanging up the call that Chandace and Sans return. They walk in silence down the hallway, both pausing at the reception desk. You only get a second to see Sans’ surprised expression as his eyes fall on you when the hand monster speaks.

“What are you wearing ?!” She demands, fingers going down to a fist.

Prepared for this, you respond. “I’m wearing something that I’m not gonna melt to death in.”

“That is not dress code.”

“So write me up, but I’m sure there’s some human law that you’d be crossing.” You bluff, crossing your arms in front of your chest. “I’ll put the shirt back on once the temperature gets to a reasonable level.”

…

“You are lucky you’re good for business, human.” She mutters, turning to walk away.

Huh? You look at the skeleton, pointing at yourself. “I’m good for business?”

…

“...Sans?”

“uh…heh…” The skeleton shakes his head, unfocused eyes closing for a second. “what did ya say?”

The hell? You tilt your head and look at Sans. “Are you okay?” Is the heat finally getting to him? A few small red sweat beads have appeared on his skull, and his cheekbones look a little red. “Do you need water or something?”

“im fine.” He mumbles.

“Alright, well…thanks for fixing the air conditioning. Seriously, it was absolute hell in here.” You smile, really meaning it. The cold air feels like it's already reaching you, though that might just be a placebo. You don’t really care. It feels good.

“right, yea. whatever.” He responds, sounding distracted. There is a long pause, where you could swear he mutters a quick ‘fuck it’ to himself, before he speaks. “when’s yer break?”

You’re a bit thrown by the sudden change in conversation. “Uh, anytime I guess, now that Chandace is back.” A pause. “Why?”

“i don’t wanna leave ya hangin’. ” He looks away, not meeting your eyes. “come by the stand.”

…You feel like you’re missing something. “Huh?”

Finally he looks at you, that grin back on his face. “lets get ya that pussy yer after.”

Pfft! You can’t help but bark out a laugh at that. A hotcat then? You have food already prepared for your break but…you can’t deny you’re unbelievably curious. “Yeah. Sure. When are you there next?”

“i gotta drop stuff off at home first so… ” He looks at his phone. “...less than five minutes?”

You’re sure you heard that wrong. Five minutes?? That's not possible, unless maybe he has the stand already out there and waiting…but it wasn’t there yesterday. When he doesn’t correct himself, you speak. “Didn’t you just say you have to go home first?”

“yup.”

“Even if you lived in the park, that’d be practically impossible.” You frown.

“oh yea?” He grins, leaning against the counter. “wanna bet?” …The flashback to the night of the party is very unwanted right now.

You swallow, pushing that aside. “Hm. Bet what?”

“i’ll be there before ya get there.”

Well, shit, you’re not in the business of turning down bets you know you’ll win. “I’d take that bet.” You smirk. “But you gotta be completely set up before I get there.”

He shrugs. “sure.”

“What do I get when I win?”

“a free hot cat.” It’s not much, but you accept it. A free lunch is still a free lunch.

“Alright, sure. What's in it for you then?”

“a drink.”

Huh? You wait for something to come after, but he just looks at you. Those intense red eye lights staring straight into yours. “You…asking me on a date Sans?” You ask, trying to keep your tone as light and joke-y as possible.

“fuck off, of course not!” He straightens up, voice growing in volume. You're surprised as he starts to ramble. “they’ve just banned me from the bar here, and this city got no grillby’s-”

…Okay, so…he wants you to…get him into the MTT Resort bar? You can do that. That’s not impossible. You shrug, interrupting him. “Sure, a drink it is. You’re not gonna win anyways.”

He blinks a few times, before that relaxed grin returns to his face. “we’ll see. we startin’ the timer now?”

“Hm.” That seems unfair. “I’ll start moving once you leave the resort.”

That grin sharpens. “ya make it too easy, doll.” He steps backwards, lazily turning on his heel to walk towards the front door. “see ya soon.”

You dutifully wait until he leaves before quickly logging out of your account on the computer. You know you’re going to win this. It’s literally impossible for him to get to any home, put away his stuff, get back to the park and fully set up a hotdog cart before you cross the street. Still, his confidence shakes you a bit. You find yourself rushing to Chandace’s door, peeking your head in and telling her that you’re going on break. You don’t even wait for a response before rushing out the door.

The terrible habit that you’ve picked up of not looking both ways in crossing the street is actually a benefit now, as you book it across the empty pavement into the park. A few monsters give you odd looks as you speed walk through the park towards the area you know the skeleton sets up his stand. You turn the corner -

…

He’s there.

You pause, feet skidding to a stop as you stare. What the fuck?! The skeleton is already looking your way, prepared for your arrival. He grins, waving his fingers in the air.

Completely bewildered, you walk up to the stand. “But…how?”

He smirks, eye lights looking you up and down. “told ya.”

“That’s not an answer…” You grumble, placing your hands down on the stand to look at him with narrowed eyes. The skeleton remains tight-lipped, just seeming amused at your weak attempt at intimidation and eventually you just give in. “Fine. You win.” You sigh, stepping back. Never let anyone say that you’re a sore loser. “So, when do you want that drink then?”

That gets a different expression. For a brief moment, he looks almost panicked, before he schools it back to regular. “not yet, doll.” He says. “i’ll let ya know.”

“Whatever, Mr. Mysterious.” You sigh, rubbing your face. Taking a moment, you look over the sign. “Well…I’m here. Can I have a ‘cat please? Oh, and do you sell cold drinks? I’m thirsty.”

Sans looks like he’s about to say something, but stops himself. Instead, he reads off a small list of drinks he has in his cart. You pick out your favourite and watch the skeleton work. It doesn’t take long, and soon he’s passing you a drink and the ‘cat.

Oh no. It's adorable! You stare down at the ‘cat in absolute joy. Honestly, it looks just like a hotdog, but with little ears and feet and…is that a tail? How the hell do they make these??

Sans chuckles, bringing you out of your reverie. You look up. “Shut up, it’s cute, okay?”

“sure, sweetcheeks.” He responds.

You take a bite, surprised to find that it somehow tastes even better than the ‘dog. What? There’s an additional flavour you can’t exactly put your finger on, but it just pulls everything together. It reminds you of…home…weirdly. You’re not entirely sure how that works.

“aw, no sounds this time?”

You flip him off immediately, glaring at him as he snickers. He doesn’t say anything else, so you get to finish the bite in relative peace. “So…you’re a mechanic but you just moonlight as a hotdog stand guy?”

“yup.”

“Why?”

He seems surprised by the question. “why else, gotta get money somehow.”

“Hm.” You hum as you take another bite, waiting until you swallow before continuing. “I would have thought that being a mechanic would be enough for the bills?”

“maybe for a human.” Sans says. “monsters don’t really have many mechanical things t’ fix.” At your confused look, he continues. “without cars, ya really only need a mechanic when somethin’ doesn’t work, right? how often does that happen?”

Oh…right. “I guess that would slow down business.” You agree. “I hope MTT Resort is paying you well for that at least. You pretty much saved the business.”

He shrugs. “most of it will be goin’ to my bro’s school.” You straighten, ready to ask a probably too nosy question, when he continues. “why do ya work at fer the robot anyways?”

The question completely turns your focus away from what you were going to ask. Work for the robot…? Oh. Mettaton. Right. Technically, you suppose you do, though you’ve never met or even seen the guy.

“Why else?” You smirk, repeating his words right back at him. “Gotta get money somehow.”

Sans eyebrow bones raise, before he chuckles. “fair ‘nough.”

It looks like he might ask another question on that topic, so you quickly interrupt. “Oh shit, right. How much for the uh…hotcat?”

He shrugs. “one.”

“Wait, it’s less than a ‘dog?” You ask. He just shrugs again. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, you grab a one from your purse and pass it over. As he's putting it away, you come to the realization that the bet and transaction are over. That's it. You're free to turn around and spend your break elsewhere. No need to remain here with the smug skeleton. But...

I…kinda don’t want to go back. The thought is a surprise, but not wrong at all. It's your break, it's nice out -the breeze cuts through the heat well-, and somehow you are having a surprisingly good conversation with Sans. Hm. Fucking weird, but true. Maybe thats your cue to leave, though? Leave on a high note, before things sour? You look down at the 'cat in your hand and think that its probably the best move.

Still, you find your feet unable to move. Instead, you lean against the cart, already opening your mouth to ask another question. “Soooo, what job has the worst customers?”

Sans looks surprised that you’re still here, which…fair. “the mechanic job.” He answers after a moment.

That's surprising. “Oh yea, why?”

“harder to tell ‘em to fuck off when they’re payin’ the bills.”

“Makes sense.” You nod sympathetically. “Hm…I bet I have a story that can beat any of yours though.”

“what? fuck off. no way.” The skeleton shakes his head.

“No no, I’m serious.” You say, waving your hand in the air. “Let me say mine, and then let's see if you can beat it?”

“you’re on.”

[Next Chapter]

#underfell sans x reader #underfell sans x y/n #sans au #sans x reader #sans x you #underfell sans x you #uf!sans x reader #uf!sans #ufsans x reader #ufsans x you #underfell fanfic #underfell!sans #mocha writes

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