#That if I tried to explain something to somebody else IRL I wouldn't be able to explain it as well

[qsmpbutwithsignlanguage]

Being fr right now, Aimsey and Quackity had some of the most entertaining interactions out of anyone in the QSMP. I died a bit every time they ended up in the same voice call /pos, they were hilarious.

[jay-and-dean]

Hey J! I would love to hear your opinion on something. You write Dean so well that I feel pretty confident to ask you. (I mean you must know something about his way of thinking,his way of behave..I can proudly say that you have a master in Dean's psychology ok?🤣) I wanted to ask you,apart from the Destiel situation(this is another conversation) in your opinion,why the authors never gave him a real love story? They tried with Lisa..it just didn't work, they had 0 chemistry in my opinion. Cassie otherwise, was really interesting and I would even liked Jo, but the writers just decided against it. Probably they never gave the brothers a true relationship because it wasn't the main focus of the show and the fandom maybe wouldn't have liked it. Anyway I was just thinking that in 15years we have never actually seen Dean's romantic side and given the complexity of his character, it still feels like a whole part of him is missing,a piece of him that we never really got to see. What do you think about it? How would you have handled his love life? Do you think that is better that he never had a real one?

Hey Anon !

First of all, thank you so much for trusting me and for your kind words.

It's actually fun that you say I have a Master in Dean's psychology (I'm actually a professional Irl).

Now regarding Dean, all I can do is give you my personal opinion. But since you asked for it, here it is (sorry it will be a little long) :

I. Supernatural

First of all, I will talk about the general theme of the TV show. Most say, including the writers themselves, that Supernatural is about family. This alone, I guess, could explain the focus on the family relationships than love, in the romantic sense of the word.

II. Quests

But, this is not all. For me, Supernatural is an initiation story. And in that way, the focus is put on the theme of redemption.

II. 1 Sam

The redemption of Sam, who is the "gifted", like a lot of other characters in literature, the one who is too gifted to fit in, the one for whom it is a curse (Being good at school, highly sensitive, that prevents him for fitting in his own family codes, then the gift of boyking Sam, the "mark" of Demon blood and the "link" to the big Bad, very like a Harry Potter figure). His own quest will be to overcome the idea that he is unclean and finally use his gifts to define who he is and not just to fit in (In that he is really close to the journey of high IQ kids in real life). Sam's quest is personal, and as long as he can't "fit" with himself, how could he with a partner ?

II. 2 Dean

Dean... Dean has the exact opposite quest. Dean is the kid that forgot himself to fit in (in psychology, we call them the sacrificed child). He is the one who wasn't given an individuality, and therefore, no true free will. Supernatural really explores this theme until the ultimate quest, against God himself. You can note that the only relationship showed in the Supernatural was, once again a "prescript" which he can't invest exactly because it is. Dean's quest is individuality and freedom. In that way, it seems pretty logical that can't link himself to yet somebody else, as long as he didn't "kill" the father figure that is keeping him a slave of their will.

III. Sacrifice

Now, something else, in my opinion is standing between Dean and a serious love interest : Dean Winchester is a sacrificial figure. He seems himself like an appendix to his brother's story, he is expendable. So in his mind, I think, he doesn't even occurs to be the architect of his own fulfillment.

IV. His girls

I agree that Lisa and Dean had not an extraordinary chemistry, and, for me, it serves the story just perfectly. Lisa is barely a person, she is an idea, an ideal. Lisa represents "apple pie" life itself. She represent what the show sells us as a goal, a perfection when it is obviously like trying to make a fish live in a tree. Dean needed this prerequisite to continue his initiation. Dean leaving her is him closing the door on a fantasy that was holding him back since childhood, because he is the one who lost it.

Jo happens in the beginning of the show and, for me again, she couldn't work. She lives in the steps of her own mother and is not the "free" alterity Dean needs to grow.

Now okay but which girl could help Dean in his quest ?

In my opinion, someone who is "free" from his own prison. Someone stranger to the issues Dean struggles with, that open his view and gives him individuality (Cassie was a good try, but way too early in his journey).

V. This side of Dean

I agree. Dean is complex, and I could talk about him for hours (if you read until this point, you know... and bravo) and getting to see this side of him would have been great. Just because we love him so much that we want to experience everything of him.

I explore this in my fics with the greatest pleasure, and I could write about Dean falling in love all my life.

Dean's personality includes radical contrasts : The highest sense of responsibility, alternated with moments when he shelters himself in childhood for example. So I'm pretty sure that for a true love to occur, the woman (or man, gender really doesn't matter) would have to be able to reach those both sides of him. I see them sitting with cross legs eating candies in front of Scooby Doo.

Cockiness and insecurity is another contrast. Leadership and habit of submission to authority (I'm talking of the sexual way this time). Sensible vs rational. Adventurous but home-loving warrior that loves comfort...

Dean romantic side would be so complex. And after a very long answer no one asked for, I'm going to have to answer the most annoying thing : If you want to know how I picture Dean in a romantic relationship, mix my fics. That is literally what I dedicated my blog to exploring.

The individuation from his father's plan in Love me once, shame on me.

His quest of the stranger in Captive.

His struggle with apple pie life in Knocked-up.

His fight for free will in Greater Good.

The deconstruction of his culture in Rescue you...

God that sounds vain, I swear I am not, just passionate.

I have to conclued by saying I have no problem with Destiel but this is indeed, another subject. And that all of this is just my opinion.

Thank you so so sooo much for this ask and please forgive the 1k words answer and the OCD presentation.

Keep being so awesome.

Love love,

Jay

[mellometal]

I know I said I don't associate myself with the Panic! fandom anymore, but this is something I have been ACHING to talk about. This is some bad timing, since it was Brent Wilson's birthday recently (yes, his birthday is July 20th, NOT August 20th; source: I've been following him on Twitter for five years and he's actually said this), but this is going to be about Brent and the whole situation with him.

Warning: What I'm about to say about the situation with Brent Wilson (original bassist) is heavily biased, since I do stan him. YEAH. I STAN BRENT MATTHEW WILSON, THE ORIGINAL BASSIST OF PANIC! AT THE DISCO. CRY ABOUT IT. STAY MAD. He's one of the ONLY members of Panic! At The Disco (past and present) who I give a fuck about, besides Ryan Ross, Spencer Smith, and Ian Crawford.

Trigger warning: This will be talking about arrest, jail, drugs (doing and selling), weapons (guns), childbirth, parenthood, and some other things. If these things are triggering for you or make you uncomfortable in any way, you do not have to read this post. Consume media that sparks joy for you.

Disclaimer: I don't know Brent in real life, I'm not in his circle of friends or people he's closest to (like his wife Taylor, his parents, his brother Blake, his in-laws, his irl friends, coworkers, etc.), and this is not me acting like I do. I don't know what his life is like outside of Twitter. The only contact I've ever had with him has been on Twitter, but it was pretty limited.

My thoughts on this situation are MY opinion, any possibilities in my thoughts are just theories and not proven to be true, and I'm not trying to excuse whatever he was allegedly charged with.

Just for the record, I am willing to have a civil conversation with anyone who hates Brent. The minute you attack me or anyone else who likes Brent, or a whole bunch of you start circle jerking about how much you hate him, you're getting blocked. If all you're going to bring up is the shit Brent did when he was in his late teens instead of adding anything useful to the discussion, you're getting blocked too. I already know about that. It happened back in 2004-2006. They were all still kids, to a point. Brent has changed quite a bit since then. The whole "Hate on Brent Wilson" bandwagon is stupid, toxic, and I refuse to jump on it. I've never jumped on it when I was in the Panic! fandom, so why would I do it now?

Remember, without Brent bringing Br3nd0n Ur!3 into Panic!, your precious Br3nd0n wouldn't be successful today. JUST SO YA KNOW. (I'm very salty right now, if you can't already tell.)

If you would like to know about what happened with Brent, a few months ago, he was arrested on (alleged) drug charges and illegal possession of a weapon, along with a traffic violation and something to do with a probation violation too. He was set to go to court back in March for his sentencing, but that's the most recent information I've found. I don't know what the fuck is going on at this point. I don't know if he's been sentenced, if he's doing anything alternative like rehabilitation, nothing. (The reason why I said they're alleged charges is because I don't know if he's even been to court for sentencing or anything like that.)

People's reactions were mixed. Some actually LAUGHED and made a whole bunch of jokes about him being arrested (that's fucking insensitive and cruel). Some felt bad for Brent because he just became a dad (yes, he's a dad, but I'm not posting any pictures of the kid out of respect for Brent and Taylor). Some were shocked. Some weren't surprised (how and why????).

My reaction? It was pretty mixed. I was shocked. I thought I was having a fever dream and what I was seeing was fake at first. When I realized it wasn't fake, I was crushed. I felt absolutely horrible for Brent, Taylor, their kid, and all their loved ones. Like, I care about the guy a lot. Obviously.

Ironically, the band members and/or group members I stan are either the black sheep or they're just not as popular. Or they're the fucking scapegoat almost EVERYONE attacks for the stupidest shit. Brent's the black sheep as well as the scapegoat of Panic!, for example....and I would say that Ian is another black sheep too. Not for any negative reasons. He's simply not as popular, due to the fact he was only in Panic! during the Vices era for a short time. He's underrated as FUCK. I'm one of the black sheep in a lot of places [except for friend groups], even in my own family, so it explains why I stan Brent still.

I just want to say that selling drugs and doing drugs aren't inherently bad things to do. This doesn't mean that I'm for kids doing drugs and selling them. Absolutely not. I want people who do drugs or sell drugs to be treated like human beings. I also want them to be able to seek help easier without the judgment or being treated like a criminal. Personally, I don't do any of that, but I understand why someone would. (This kind of thing hits home for me.)

As far as the whole weapon thing is concerned (it was a gun), I personally don't like them and we need better gun control in the United States. I don't think I'd trust anyone who owns a gun because of the possibility that they would hurt me or worse in an argument or something. I've seen my abuser threaten to pull a gun out on my dad when I was a kid. Thankfully it wasn't loaded, but still. It was scary. I wouldn't own a gun because I'm autistic, mentally ill, and I'm afraid of what I might do in certain situations. If someone wants to own a gun for protection, hunting, target practice, or to collect them, fine. BUT YOU DON'T NEED A HUGE ASS GUN THAT THE MILITARY USES TO GO HUNTING OR FOR TARGET PRACTICE. I don't like them, I don't want one, I don't trust myself with one, guns scare me, and I want better gun control in the United States. It terrifies me that people openly carry. I understand that's the Second Amendment and all, but it doesn't change the fact that it terrifies me. As long as you're responsible with that kind of thing, I don't really care.

I don't know what Brent's reason was for (allegedly) owning a weapon (maybe for protection or something?), but it's none of my business.

In my opinion, this is all stupid shit. There are people who have done horrible things and they're STILL free people, but oh, god forbid you do or sell drugs! THAT'S bad. /s

Here's my response below. I'll type out everything, except for the disclaimers and what he was arrested for. I will start from the fifth paragraph on the first screenshot and continue from there. This is so anyone who has a hard time reading any of the screenshots can read them easier.

(My response was from around the time it was announced that he was arrested. Just so you know.)

First screenshot, fifth paragraph:

First off, I just want to say that this situation is a fucked up one for anyone to be in. I would never wish this on anyone. Especially because now, there's a baby involved, so this makes the situation worse. This is pretty difficult for me to put into words without coming off as bitchy or anything like that, so if I get bitchy here, I apologize.

Second screenshot, fifth paragraph:

I don't know what caused this mess to begin with, but I do know that Brent and his wife Taylor just had a baby a couple months ago (when I was typing this out initially). While it's a good thing for them, it can be assumed that this is also a very stressful time for them.

Combination of third and fourth screenshots (These are pretty much only theories; not facts, and they will be broken up into paragraphs): 

The pandemic most likely isn’t helping their case. Las Vegas is a HUGE city and I’m sure A LOT of people there are REALLY struggling right now in all aspects. Maybe Brent and Taylor are struggling to pay off hospital bills or whatever (to put this into perspective, the average cost for hospital childbirth in Nevada is around $21,239, according to CBS News). The average salary for an accountant in Nevada is anywhere from $34k to $150k, and that all depends on education, experience (how long you’ve been in said career), certifications, and any additional skills. Take into account any other necessities they have to pay for, like their mortgage, bills, insurance, etc. 

Let’s say that they did manage to pay everything else off, but they’re struggling to pay the hospital bills from when they had their baby. (Having a baby is fucking expensive in the United States, regardless of whether there are complications or not, and regardless of whether you have insurance or not.) Let’s say they’ve tried every single option out there, but nothing seems to give still. Maybe the drug selling was a last resort on Brent’s part. (As I’ve said, I don’t know the full story.)

The whole subject of drug paraphernalia hits home for me. My parents both did drugs when I was a kid. I’ve seen it a lot growing up. My dad was, in the past, in and out of jail for drugs and other things that aren’t relevant here. I’m not sure if my mom was in and out of jail for the same shit, but I know for a fact my dad was. Y’know, because he told me. ANYWAYS. 

I get it. You gotta do what you gotta do. It’s not something I’d do personally, but I understand why somebody would do it. I wouldn’t treat them any differently. Maybe they’re selling drugs or whatever to keep themselves from losing their homes, put food on the table for their families, help pay their bills, pay for their education, whatever. It could be a number of things.

Fifth screenshot (people’s reactions to the news and my thoughts on them):

Now...let’s move on to how people are reacting to the news. There’s a lot of mixed reactions. A lot of people feel bad for Brent, especially since he and Taylor just had a baby a couple months ago (as I was typing this). Some people “aren’t surprised” because they were never fans of him in the first place. Others think this is amusing. I’ve seen some people who are solely involved in celebrity news (similar to TMZ) making jokes about the situation, which to me, is appalling.

Let me tell you something. It doesn’t matter if you’re a fan of Brent or not. This shit isn’t funny or cute in the slightest. It sure isn’t funny or cute to anyone who is being affected by the situation, which includes Brent himself, Taylor, their son, and all their loved ones. Like, full stop. Have some decency. Y’all are fucking gross. You can dislike Brent all you want, but he’s a real human being who fucked up. Personally, when I first heard the news, I couldn’t believe it at first. I thought I was having a fever dream. That is, until I looked it up and actually found that it was true. I was CRUSHED. Why? Because Brent is one of the last people I’d even expect to get into this whole mess. 

Sixth screenshot (my thoughts):

If I’m being honest here...like, BRUTALLY honest, Brent needs to be put in REHAB, not jail. For anyone who has been here (on my Instagram) from when I used to dedicate this account to vintage Panic!, you know how I’ve never said anything but kind things about Brent. From the few times I’ve interacted with him a little bit on Twitter and from how I’ve seen him interact with others on the site, Brent is one of the sweetest people ever. I’m being genuine here. He’s a good guy who fucked up and did some dumb shit. Does that make him bad? No. Then again, as far as I’ve read about the current situation at hand, it’s too early to really determine anything. None of us know what caused him to have drug paraphernalia or anything else that he was arrested for in the first place.

Seventh screenshot (wrap-up):

I’m gonna wrap this up here. My heart aches for Brent, Taylor, their son, and all their loved ones. I hope that everything gets straightened out, all sides of the story come out, and that Brent can get his shit together again. Like he had been doing since he was kicked out of Panic!. I wish everyone involved nothing but the absolute best right now, given how fucked up the whole situation is. (Just to clear up any confusion, when I was referring to Taylor, I’m NOT referring to Taylor Swift or any other celebrity with the name Taylor. I’m referring to Brent’s wife.) 

If you’ve read this far, thank you! If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I’ll try to answer as best as I can.

Have my thoughts on the situation changed since February - March of this year? No.

I think that Brent needs some kind of help. That's why I mentioned rehab. It's obvious to me that's the kind of help he needs. I don't believe jail is helpful in certain circumstances (like drug charges, traffic violations, and other nonviolent crimes)....at least in the United States. They treat people who do drugs and/or sell drugs like they're subhuman. Yet there are people who have committed violent, deplorable, horrific crimes, and they're still free people. Funny how that works. I'm not too educated about how the jail system works in other countries, so I can't exactly tell you how I feel about that system on an international standpoint.

Brent should be with his wife and child. I hope the guy gets his shit together again. I believe Brent WILL get his shit together. Genuinely. I would never wish anything bad on him.

I don't crucify Brent like a lot of people in the Panic! fandom do. The only reason I would hypothetically do so is if Brent actually committed violent, deplorable, horrific crimes (i.e., chomo bullshit, trafficking...like, extreme shit) that would warrant him being locked up and I'd drop him completely at that point. OBVIOUSLY I DON'T SEE HIM DOING ANYTHING LIKE THAT. EVER. THAT'S JUST HYPOTHETICAL.

Anyways....have a good day, y'all.