#Thanks for celebrating ShoSho's birthday
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for Shota:
From Kylie: any acts of service/chores done, lots of kisses, a soft pink robe to match those pants, a dinner at a nice restaurant
From Renée: babysitting Eri, cat toys
From Remy/Rogue/Hestia: cooked breakfast & lunch, a lil cat home, a tea set
From Mun: cat memes & a hug (if allowed)
@dhampiravidi has many things for the birthday boy.
Shota would appreciate all of these things. I think he actually might even be a little bit overwhelmed with all of the love that he gets from his new found family. It might even warrant one of his nicer smiles. He even would begrudgingly accept the hug.
#inbox: ask me no questions and i will tell you no lies#dhampiravidi#Thanks for celebrating ShoSho's birthday
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Forgive Me
Summary:Â It only seemed more prevalent, now more than ever, that people like him didnât deserve people like you.
Word Count: 4.8k+ Words
Pairing: Natsuo x Reader (21+)
Warnings: blood, death, gang organization involvement, gun use, sexual content, explicit language, and angst
A/N: First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MAIN MAN NATSUO TODOROKI!! And I also want to say thank yâall so much for 2k followers! You make my heart ache. To celebrate, I wrote this self-indulgent mafia au fanfic that nobody asked for. I honestly just wanted to write Todorokis involved in organized crime.Â
All the Japanese in here is from Google Translate. It most likely butchered it, so Iâm sorry about that. I tried.Â
Some things to mention: *Yakuza: Basically, the Japanese mafia *Oyabun: The leader of the organization *Onna-Oyabun: The spouse of the leader. It really translates to the âwife.â I tried to keep things gender neutral, however, I couldnât find a gender neutral term for this. Please forgive me!
Thank you for ridin with me, yâall! Enjoy this one, hotties â€ïž  Â
Forgive Me
All Natsuo had ever wanted for you was normalcy. Call it wishful thinkingâhis siblings called it naivety. However, there was nothing more the young successor wished for than for you to have the life you deserved. One filled with love, laughter, and smiles. Not tears, blood, and bullets.
He wanted you to be able to come from work or class with a head full of things for the two of you to gossip about over dinner and ice cream. He wanted to be able to cancel his day and take you to that one amusement park you always talked about. He wanted the petty arguments about whose turn it was to do the dishes and whose brownie recipe was better.
Natsuo wanted that for you. Not this.
Your shared room suddenly felt cold and rigid as he stood by the doorway. The sight of your body curled into the sheets, hoping the mattress would swallow you up, made his heart ache. There was no movement except for the slow rise of your breathing as you stared at the wall next to the bed.
Natsuoâs grey eyes focused on the bandage patched to your ear and was brought back to the events prior. An event that had been the reason why he couldnât have spent the evening in your arms.
[Earlier]
Since having been introduced into the Todoroki lifestyle, life had been hectic. You had been ripped away from your normalcy and propelled into the yakuza* game. It was seeped in cruelty, darkness, and evil that would make you spend nights shivering.
Ever since you had been engaged to Natsuo, your exposure only grew worse. Your fiancĂ© would spend nights apologizing, but youâd only quiet him with a kiss and a small joke.
It wasnât his fault. His older brother, Touya, was âdeceasedâ. It was against tradition for Fuyumi to have it, and Shouto was too young. He would have to be the next Oyabun* and, despite his unwillingness, there was nothing anyone could do about it.
But that wasnât something to dwell on. Especially today. Today, you had plans to go shopping with Fuyumi and Shouto and end the night with some well-deserved quality time with your husband-to-be. You had rarely seen anyone due to yakuza activity, so this was something you were looking forward to.
You smoothed down your outfit, adjusting your watch in the mirror. You gave yourself a nod, liking what you saw.
Natsuo came from around the corner, eyeing you with a glint you knew all too well. He apparently liked what he saw too.
âHi,â he said, smiling into your kiss.
âHey,â you grinned. You flattened the collar of his shirt where his tattoo peeked from his neck. âYou look good.â
He was quick to respond. âYou look better.â
âYou flatter me,â you chuckled. âDid you pick where weâre eating for dinner later?â Â
âI made reservations for the seafood restaurant you like so much. The one with the lights by the ocean.â
âOooo with the parmesan crusted flounder and the stuffed oysters?â
He hummed a yes and laughed as you did a little dance expressing your excitement. You couldnât wait to stuff your face. While being classy of course.
âWhat time?â
â6:30. Is that okay?â
âYeah, that should give âYumi, ShoSho, and I enough time to shop around.â You turned to the mirror to put some last-minute touches to your hair. âWe still have to find an outfit for your motherâs event Friday. You know your brotherâs a lowkey diva about that stuff so itâs gonna take hours.â
A sudden slap on your ass made you yelp and just as you were about to cuss him out, Natsuo captured your lips in a kiss that made your knees buckle. He slowly explored your mouth, committing every taste to memory. Your hands massaged the nape of his neck and it had him growling in your ear.
âWhy donât you skip the shopping today and we can start on dinner now?â he suggested, loving the moan he got from you as he sucked on your neck.
As much as you adored the offer, you werenât going to pass up the chance to get out of the house. Youâd been cooped up in there for too long. Not even his dick could get you out of this.
You pushed him off of you, laughing as he bit the air between you, trying to put his lips back on you.
âNatâNatsuo. Stop it. I promised them Iâd go shopping today, so no. Besides, Iâm already running late. I was supposed to meet them at 1 and itâs 1:30.â
âBut you just look so good, baby.â He managed to pull you flush against his chest, mischief in his eyes. You gave him a look when his hands went to go grab a handful of your ass. âIâm sure they wonât mind if you're just an hour more late,â he said, going back to lay claim to your lips.
If last nightâs sex was a testament to anything, youâd be here for much longer than an hour. If you didnât get your ass to the car, youâd be stuck at home and his siblings would have your head.
âBoy, if you donât get off me, Iâll tell Fuyumi youâre keeping me hostage again. Sheâll sick Shouto on you,â you threatened.
At the thought of his sister and brotherâs nagging, he rolled his eyes and backed off. âUgh, youâre such a killjoy. Fine, whatever.â You hummed in triumph and turned to walk away. Natsuo gave another hard slap to your backside again and you sent him back a glare that made him smirk.
âNatsu,â you warned.
âYou better get in the car quick before I really decide to keep you here.â
âKeep it in your pants, horndog,â you bit.
âKeep that ass away and we wonât have problems,â he playfully retorted.
You smacked your teeth but hid the growing smile on your lips. That man would be the death of you.
âŠ
Despite your wishes, you ended up being an hour late. Natsuo tried to play innocent underneath his siblingsâ threats but stopped the act once they pointed out the growing hickey on your neck.
He was waved off, much to his chagrin, when he told the three of you to be wary of your surroundings and reminded you of the security guards that would be following close by. He finally left for his meeting with few choice words and a kiss promising his return.
Fuyumi grabbed your arm and gave you a smile that was contagious. âNow that Natsu stopped hogging you, we can finally hang out!â she cheered. âThe outlet just opened up a few new stores weâve been eyeing for a while now!â
Shouto nodded in agreement. âIâve been waiting all week to use my fatherâs credit card.â
âDidnât you buy a fur coat yesterdayââ
âThatâs besides the point.â
Once Shouto took your other arm, the three of you spent your time going from store to store. At first, the objective was to find outfits for the party Friday, however you three had become easily distracted with the sight of a smoothie stand.
A couple hours had gone by, and not much was done. Although you might have wasted time (and money) shopping at miscellaneous stores, neither one of you cared.
It had been so long since you laughed so freely. With Endeavor across the ocean, things were steadily heating up. Enemies took his leave as an open shot and the Todoroki siblings were obliged to reinforce why their family reigned supreme. Due to that, it seemed no one could go a day without stressing over something.
Between that and Natsuoâs near-obsessive mission to keep you safe and away from the details of the yakuza, you were forced to stay in the house twiddling your thumbs with constant security around you.
Feeling so useless drove you crazy. No matter how many times you tried to get your fiancĂ© to let you help, he would always give you a firm no. Fuyumi and Shouto tried their best to keep you out of it as well. Even Dabi warned you about wanting something so dangerous. Â
It was frustrating, but you tried to understand. Regardless, having the chance to hang out with your friends like old times was a saving grace and youâd enjoy it to its fullest.
Eventually, you three made it to the boutiques and clothing departments. Shouto had already gotten a suit tailored so it was left with you and Fuyumi.
Your soon-to-be sister-in-law found an extravagant gown that stole your breath. The crimson dress hugged her body in all the right places, accentuating the softness of her feminine figure and the coolness of her kind eyes. It was beautifully bold statement speaking to the fire within Fuyumi many seemed to miss. But no one would overlook that spirit with a dress like that. Her measurements were taken, and the dress was quickly swiped off the rack and sent to the tailor.
Your clothing didnât come easy. Fuyumi was indecisive and Shouto was a harsh critic.
âHmm, that oneâs too much.â
âNope, not enough.â
âToo loose.â
âToo tight.â
âNo.â
âHell no.â
âIâm pretty sure someone from the Nanu family wore that in 2016. Next.â
It had taken nearly an entire hour before the three of you found your outfit. Something that had caught your eye was soon being shimmied over your body. When you stepped out of the dressing room, you were relieved when Fuyumi nearly cried and Shoutoâs bi-colored eyes twinkled with satisfaction. The material was comfortable on your body and the pigment made your skin color brilliantly glow. It moved and swayed like it was meant for you. It just felt right.
âThatâs the one,â Shouto smiled.
âYou think so?â you asked, checking over the detailing.
âYouâre going to steal the show, as always, Y/N,â Fuyumi gushed. âThe most beautiful Onna-Oyabun* the yakuza have seen this generation.â
At the mention of the word, you casted your eyes downward. âRight. Iâm going to be the new Onna-Oyabun,â you sighed.
The two Todorokis caught the heaviness of your tone and looked at one another in sadness. They were privy to the burdens of this family and the titles that came along with it. Your reaction wasnât abnormal, but the despondent gleam in your eyes was still hard to sit with.
âY/Nââ
The sound of Shoutoâs phone cut off his words. As he listened to the quiet words from the other line, his eyes began to harden. The store clerk kept you busy, but Fuyumi noticed his sudden rigidness.
Her brotherâs eyes flicked towards the door and she caught the sight of more their bodyguards surrounding the boutique, hands on their weapons.
There were a few more words said before Shouto spoke.
âAnata wa mĆru o torikakonde imasu. Natsuo wa 5-bu de soto de aimasu.â (Keep the mall surrounded. Natsuo will meet us outside in five minutes.)
Fuyumi met her brotherâs eyes once more and understood the situation.
âSo, the seamstress said sheâll tighten around the waist and add more fabric to the end. Itâll be ready by tomorrow evening,â you said to them.
Shouto excused himself while Fuyumi walked towards you, a practiced smile on her lips.
âPerfect. Now letâs get you changed and out for your date. Natsuo will be here any minute.â
âŠ
The car ride to the restaurant was filled with your rambling about the day and Natsuoâs usual teasing. When he got into the car after speaking with his siblings, he seemed very tense. So you were happy you were able to get him to relax. Work mustâve put him on edge, and you were determined to let the rest of your night come stress free.
When you got there, he helped you out of the car and you made your way to the door. You were surprised to see who was standing by the entrance.
âDabi?â
âHey there, doll,â he said behind an easy smirk. He kissed the back of your hand. âStill see youâre with this punk. Tragic.â
You tried to hide your giggle as Natsuo punched his brotherâs shoulder.
âBack off, brick-face. Lookinâ like a burnt raisin.â
âYou wound me,â Dabi faux gasped.
âWhat are you doing here?â you asked.
Although Dabi kept his eyes on you, he felt his brotherâs stare on his face.
âJust doing some patrol. Heard you were coming around and couldnât pass up the opportunity to say hi to my new favorite Todoroki,â he responded coolly.
You quirked your brow at that. âDid something happen?â
Dabi opened the door. âNah, nothing you need to worry about. You just enjoy your dinner for me, yeah?â
Before you could say anything more, you felt the man behind you place his hand on your lower back and guide you into the restaurant. You didnât miss the order he hissed to his brother before closing the door behind him.
You had to learn Japanese one of these days, damn it.
As you stood in line to be seated, you eyed your fiancé.
âI know somethingâs going on,â you spoke.
Natsuo didnât even flinch. âWhat do you mean?â
âWhyâs Dabi here?â
âYou heard what he said. For patrol.â
âPatrol for what? He doesnât just police the area for no reason.â
âIt was just on some small case weâve been working on. No biggie,â he shrugged.
You frowned at his play of innocence. You were getting kind of tired of this. âYou know how much I hate being kept in the darkâŠâ
âItâs nothing you have to concern yourself with, babe. Iâve got it handled.â
âNatsuoââ
âY/N, please.â
You watched his shoulders sag a bit from the heavy sigh that left his mouth. If you hadnât been watching, you wouldâve missed the fatigue that flashed across his face. To see someone usually so upbeat look so tired made your chest ache.
You knew you were being pushy, but all the secrets were piling up and your curiosity was starting to become insatiable.
âIâŠI just want to help,â you softly admitted. âI donât mean to be annoying.â
âYouâre not being annoying,â he answered in a heartbeat. Natsuo pulled you close and kissed your temple, feeling comforted by your smell. âI know all these secrets drive you crazy, but Iâm trying to protect you.â
You placed a hand on his cheek to which he placed a kiss to your palm. âAnd I want to lessen your burden. Weâre in this together, baby. You donât have to handle all of this alone anymore.â
âI know, sweetheart,â he whispered. He stared into your eyes for a moment before gently smiling down at your hopeful gaze. âHow âbout this? We forget about all this yakuza stuff whiles weâre here, and as soon as we get home, Iâll fill you in on my meeting today. Sound fair?â
It wasnât exactly what you wanted, but it was a step in the right direction. Besides, you could see how eager he was to forget about the topic. The focus of this night was about having fun, so you would drop it for now.
You pecked his lips and nodded in agreement. âDeal.â
âBet.â
The hostess met you two just as you pulled away from one another. She led you to your table where you had a clear view of the beach behind the crystal glass. Your waitress, an older woman with a smile that felt safe, got you settled in.
âMy name is Jane and Iâll be serving you today. May I get your drinks?â
Natsuo looked to you. âWine?â
You made a thoughtful face. âYeah. Sure. Something on the sweeter side.â
âBring us Moet Chandon Dom Perignon. 2008.â
âYes, sir,â she bowed before going to retrieve the drinks.
You frowned in confusion, the bran unknown to you. That was before your eyes scanned over the wine listing. You choked on your spit.
That bottle could pay rent.
Rich people were crazy.
âEverything okay?â
âYeah, sorry. Something in my throat,â you coughed.
After the waitress brought your drinks and you placed your orders (you both ordered enough for eight but whatâs new?), you and Natsuo spent your time talking and laughing.
It was like old times. He was the jokester, throwing out horrible pick-up lines with a terrible pun to match. Youâd tease him, snickering when heâd whine about how sensitive he was.
You missed this. A lot.
Your previous grievances left your mind. Like he said, for now, youâd forget about the yakuza. The carefree smile on your fiancĂ©âs face, the one that reminded of you of just how young he really was, was beautiful. He was only 23 and dealing with so much. You wanted this expression of freedom to remain for as long as possible.
âThe âSawâ series wasnât even that scary. It was just really gross,â you said.
âFair. But the one with the teeth was kinda scary. Saw 3 I think? I couldnât sleep for like, five days,â Natsuo shivered.
âOkay, yeah. That one wasâŠew,â you agreed. âBut remember âThe Human Centipedeâ? Now that was some creepy shit. I couldnât eat cereal for a month.â
Natsuo visibly paled, sticking his tongue out in disgust. âNah for real, bro. Iâll never watch that shit again. I feel like it was some big, grotesque, sexual innuendo.â
You gave him a flat look.
âWhat the fuck, Natsu.â
âNo, listen! Remember the part where they took the hammer andâ"
âYour food, Mr. Todoroki and Mr/s. L/N,â Jane interrupted. A questioning look flashed across her face but you two just stifled your laughs.
The other waiters laughed as they stood behind her with the food in their hands.
You were eyeing the hell out of those oysters.
âHere we have the lobster bisque, the shrimp tacos, the stuffed oystersââ
âIâll take that one, please!â you excitedly clapped.
âExcellent choice.â
âAnd you say Iâm a child,â Natsuo snorted.
You threw a glare his way. âLittle boy, if you donâtââ
And just as your day had been filled with laughter, the sound of one bullet tore through that illusion.
It was as if the world had stilled for a moment. Then, there was screaming and the onslaught of gunpower. There were so many men in dignified suits running in and out of the restaurant. You hadnât even blinked before two waiters dropped to the ground, piled beneath the food they were holding.
Two shots rang near your table, and you felt a string of fresh blood paint the sides of your face and a burning sensation on your left ear. Two hands held the table and the back of your chair, body a shield from the bullets.
You slowly looked up and saw Janeâs bright blue eyes wide with surprise. There was a moment of silence as her bottom lip wavered, wanting to say something.
However, her last breath slipped through her lips as you watched the life dull in her cerulean irises.
That bullet was meant for you. That bullet was meant to kill you and insteadâŠinsteadâŠ
When she fell onto you, dead, thatâs when you screamed.
At some point, Natsuo had gotten you into his arms. His body was ice cold as he used his quirk to protect you and carry you out. He was shouting orders and curses while trying to coax you out of your numbness. However, you couldnât hear anything.
The stench of blood was strong. You saw how the bodies of innocent men, women, and children laid piled on the floor. They bled out; their lives taken from them before they even had the chance to think about it.
You closed your eyes when you saw blue and red flames lick the ground. You had seen enough.
Somehow, you had gotten outside and away from the warzone. Natsuo carried you into the car.
âDoraibu!â he thundered. (Drive!)
The driver took off with speed that made our backs hit the seats. Once he hit the main streets, miles away from the scene, Natsuo took his hand off the gun and quelled his quirk.
His phone lit up and it wasnât long before he blew up at whoever was on the other end. You donât think youâve ever heard him use a tone so mean and angry. He roared into the phone, his words foreign to your ears. However, you couldnât concentrate on that.
The shock of what just occurred struck your body numb. The ringing in your ears hadnât stopped since the first bullet. You could still smell the blood and the bodies. Janeâs lifeless eyes would haunt you forever.
The same bullet that tore into her heart was meant for you. Whoever shot that, was aiming to kill. Kill you. But instead, Jane had taken that place. For what reason, you didnât know. But she did. Â
You didnât know which one was worse.
Bile rose in the back of your throat and you let out a shaky breath.
You could do nothing else but hold your head.
Natsuo had gotten off the phone and looked over at you in silence. His grey eyes stormed with pain from the way your shoulders hunched over in grief.
He reached for you. âY/N, sweetheartââ
You flinched away as his fingertips ghosted your skin.
âDonât fucking touch me,â you seethed.
He quickly withdrew his hands.
âAreâŠare you okay?â he slowly spoke.
The glare you gave him made him avert his eyes in anguish.
âAm I okay? Youâre asking me if Iâm okay!?â
âI just want to make sure youâre not hurt,â he thickly swallowed.
âAre you serious, Natsuo!? I just saw twenty people die in front of me and youâre asking if Iâm okay!??â
Guilt drowned him, but you just couldnât seem to care at the moment as rage took over your body.
âI asked you to tell me what was going on. Iâve been fucking begging you to keep me up to date so I can just be prepared for when things like this happen!â
âI know.â
âIf I had just known someone was trying to take me out, I wouldâve stayed the fuck home, but you wouldnât tell me and now thereâs people DEAD!!â
âI know. Iâm sorry, Y/N.â
âFuck your sorry!â you roared. âFuck you, Natsuo! Sorry wonât bring those people back!â
Your voice was beginning to grow hoarse but screaming felt good. It was the only thing that felt real even as it took you to hysteria.
âI know those bullets were meant for me! They wanted toâtoâoh my God!â Your breathig grew erratic as it all dawned on you. âIâm supposed to be dead! They wanted to kill me! I canât! I canât do this!â
Natsuo felt his heart break with every sob that ripped from your mouth. He wanted so badly to hold you and take you away from all of this. However, he knew better.
For the entire car ride and throughout the time it took for the nurses to patch you up, you hadnât allowed him to touch you. You even ignored him until he was forced to leave you to rest.
When he told you he loved you, it hurt like hell to see you wordlessly disappear behind the bedroom door. That pain was what later fueled him back to the scene of the crime and into doing things to the captured enemies he would never utter to anyone that wasnât there.
Fuyumi and Shouto couldnât look him in his eyes for the rest of the day. It was Dabi, as heartless as he was, that told him it was enough.
He would give anything to give you what you deserved, a life without pain and death. But thatâs not how it worked. Not in this life.
He knew that, yet, he had been selfish and took you for himself. Now, this was the result. Your life in unremitting danger because of who he was.
The agonized screams of dry ice burning away flesh constantly played in his head. It only seemed more prevalent, now more than ever, that people like him didnât deserve people like you. Â
[Present]
Natsuoâs heavy stare caused you to shift. As he changed into pajamas, you looked at the clock. It was 2am.
You hadnât realized it was so late.
You felt a heavy dip in the bed and watched your fiancé carefully settle into the sheets. His face was clean of blood and dirt, so he must've showered before coming back home.
A pregnant pause filtered between you two. As you continued to stare at one another, you could see his façade slip with each passing second. The blank front he was so skilled at putting up melted as his eyes continued to pass over the bandages. His eyes sunk and the skin around them was dark with wear. He looked exhausted.
The anger that had once bristled inside of you had given way to melancholy a long time ago. You felt so empty and lonely with the dark thoughts that circled in your head. Sleep wasnât an option if you wanted to avoid the nightmares that would plague you.
The two of you scooted closer to one another. Natsuo was the first to speak. He spoke in a voice so small, you almost missed it.
âCan I touch you?â
âPlease,â you whispered.
Soon enough, you were in his arms, chin on his shoulder as he peppered the junction between your neck and collarbone with kisses. You relished in his hands exploring your body, missing how he just seemed to swallow you up.
âI love you, Y/N,â he breathed.
âI love you too, Natsuo.â
Much of the night was spent reminding yourselves of the otherâs touch. Natsuo drew your lips captive, his tongue overtaking you with dizzying pleasure. You couldnât keep track of where his mouth was. Whether it was on your lips, on your stomach, or in between your legs, you savored how good it felt.
Soon, his low growls and moans were hot against your ears. Your nails ran down Natsuoâs back as his hips swam into you, taking his time to rememorize how you felt around him. The bed creaked along with your moans. You threw your head back and gripped whatever you could hold of him during your lovemaking.
It seemed youâd reach your high over and over again. You could never get enough of each other. There was something intoxicating about how his tongue would roll over yours as he pounded into you, staking claim over your body as he gave himself to you until he couldnât.
When your bodies couldnât go any longer, you just lied underneath the sheets. Natsuo lied on top of you, head on your chest and listened to your heartbeat. You pushed back his sweaty bangs, staring down at him. Â
You hadnât even realized you were crying until his thumbs went to swipe past your cheeks.
âDamn it,â you hiccupped.
Natsuo let his vulnerability slip. âI know theyâre just words, but Iâm so sorry, Y/N,â he said. His voice cracked and it was your turn to catch the tears that fell from his eyes.
âI know. Iâm sorry too.â
âYou have nothing to apologize for.â
âNo, I shouldnât have yelled at you like that. I was justâŠâ
âJust what?â
A fresh wave of images from today filled the forefront of your mind. Those pictures did something to you. A switch was flicked. Â
Your voice caught in your throat and your eyes pinched as more tears filled them. However, these were not tears of fright, rather tears of animosity. The anger you thought had left you had turned into something worse. Something much darker. Â
Natsuo saw that look many times before in his own reflection. Vengeance. Pure, unadulterated, vengeance. And as much as he hated it, it was the gas that incited his own flame. Â
âNatsuo,â you spoke like you were about to tell a secret. You slowly swallowed the ball in your throat.
âWhat is it, baby? Tell me what it is you want.â
The words that left your mouth felt different, but you would never regret them.
âWhoever it was, whoever was behind this, I want them gone,â you instructed, voice stone cold. âFor every child lost, I want ten of their heads. For all our men they took, I want their bodies burned. For the life they took from Jane, I want their blood on the street. Today, they took their stance when they tried to kill me.â
You held his face and fell into his gaze with hard eyes. In those grey irises, you saw a man that would stand against an army for you. It gave you the courage to say your order.
âAnd for that, I want the entire yakuza dead.â Â
The glint in his eye matched your own and you knew there was no turning back. Natsuo nodded without a second thought. There was nothing to think about. Heâd give you the entire world or burn it down at the flick of your hand.
âYes, my Onna-Oyabun. Your wish is my command.â
He sealed the deal with a kiss.
âThis is war.â
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