#THIS IS LIKE. A SUPER SHORT CONCEPT TRACK FOR A GAME I'D LIKE TO WORK ON (ONCE I FINISH MAKING ALL MY GAY PORN)

[unfortunateretard]

WORK IN PROGRESS

[duskforged-alt]

State of the Author: January 2024

Normally, I wouldn't do a thing like this. However, because I have not actually updated y'all on my WIPs in a while, I thought I might as well!

We'll start with the thing most of you followed me for: long-form fiction. And I call it that since all of these will be over 15k words (hopefully). There are three novels I'm currently focusing on.

LONG-FORM FICTION

Lodestar is currently stuck in a worldbuilding spiral, since it's a near-future humanity in space. While I do love sci-fi, science and math are not especially my forte. I hope to start drafting by the end of the summer, around September.

Vespertine has started on the first draft, though I'm also outlining still - something of a combined process. I am excited to share more of it with you, though it may be tough since most of it still lives in my head. Such is the woe of the artist.

Unto Summer Kings is in the first draft and currently hovering around 15k words! So far it's the longest I've gotten on a novel, and if I stay on track I could start my second draft by May, and begin beta reading by August.

LONG-FORM FANFICTION

I hesitate a little to touch on this one, just because. However, for the pure self indulgence I will. I have three major fanfics currently posted on my AO3, all of them multichaptered.

The Hanged Man is a Naruto SI!OC as Hatake Sakumo, immediately before his death. I currently have 8 chapters out and the main beats of the fic are fully outlined as of this month, which marks a major turning point in the fic's planning.

The Ever-Growing Gloaming is another self insert, this time into the events of Baldur's Gate 3. Vespere, the main character, whose name is subject to change, has been plucked from August 2023 and has not played the game since early access March 2023. Therefore they know less than you might expect.

Finally I have my Supernatural series, For Want of a Broken Nail (Broken Nail Verse). And I know what you're going to say, it's super meta to have a self insert in that fandom, you're writing SPN fanfic in 2024 what is wrong with you, etc etc. But the concept seized me full on by the balls and I already have the first 5 seasons outlined. Sorry, not sorry? No one is obligated to read it anyhow.

I also have a billion ideas on the backburner, ranging from fandoms like Game of Thrones and the MCU (for some reason) to Avatar: the Last Airbender and Star Wars. I'll post 'em when I post 'em!

ART PROJECTS

Wolf in Shepherd's Clothing is a comic of humanity's first lycanthrope, taking place in ancient Mesopotamia, in what is modern day Iran. The main character, Lahar, is gender neutral/ambiguous. So far, I'm stuck in outlining and drafting but hopefully soonTM.

Witchboy (title wip) is a story I'm working on with my partner @fallenorpheus based on various YA novels we read growing up. So far we aren't super set on the story, but it's definitely about a boy who is (accidentally) a witch, his best friend, his adoring father, and his estranged mother.

Dame-Errant (title wip) is a story that, instead of in comic form, is a story that is illustration snapshots, accompanied by short story prose. It is about a butch knight, Dame Johana Talon, who is tasked by Queen Atossa to find her missing son, Prince Khosrow. Typical 'prince(ss) in the tower shenanigans' but then, politics. And boy does Jo hate politics.

I have other webcomic ideas (mtf vs bbeg accidentally breaking a prophecy, team of bipoc/minority characters getting thrown into a fantasy world for an adventure, etc) so feel free to ask.

PERSONAL

I hesitate to touch on this, really, since it's not something that just anyone needs to know, but I've been struggling to find a good name for myself. Hesperos is a good name, but doesn't necessarily feel like 'me' these days. I do enjoy the h/e sounds... I've considered Ezra, but that's just the name of an OC and I'd rather not get quite that meta.

Ah well, sure it'll sort itself out eventually.

THE END

Anyway, thanks for reading! I know that's quite a lot for this one post to cover, but you stuck til the very end. Not sure when I'll start posting again in earnest but I hope sooner rather than later!

[timeless-ephemeri]

devlog january '25

as one of my new years resolutions, i decided to commit to putting in gamedev work every month. i'll be trying to keep a monthly devlog to help keep me on track as well. i'm excited to finally be able to share some stuff about my game, though it's still very early days in development. the project title is vertical reality and it's going to be a 2.5d platformer with a focus on time-attack gameplay. you'll use various optical media-based powerups to try to rush through short, tightly designed vertical levels as fast as possible. my biggest sources of inspiration for it are the sonic games and neon white, you could think of it as a bit of a combo of those with plenty of other things and my own ideas thrown in.

what do i have so far?

i've worked off and on (more off than on thus far, i must admit) fleshing out concepts and building out a prototype. in terms of actual game, i've got a first pass on the basic character control and physics. there's still a lot of polish here and there on it, but mostly it's just down to turning dials until everything starts to feel good.

originally i was using godot's built in character controller, but i got pretty fed up by its limitations and largely black-boxed nature so i ended up building my own. i had to figure out a lot of things like how to integrate physics and how to handle floor snapping and edge detection. i had a surprisingly hard time really finding practical resources on this sort of thing, so i had to do a lot of trial and error and debugging and whatnot, but i was eventually able to come up with something that seems to work pretty well and that i have way more control over, so i'm quite happy with my progress on that end.

in terms of the concept side of things, i've got a pretty solid foundation. i recently set up a personal wiki (via a neat project called tiddlywiki) and i super duper recommend it if you're doing gamedev (or any sort of project that would benefit from some organized documentation). slowly but surely i've been fleshing out ideas for the game, everything from worldbuilding to ideas for the powerup cds. i've still got a lot to figure out the specifics on, but it's definitely coming together.

most recently i finished the design for the player character, river! the design went through a ton of iterations, and i'm pretty happy with what i ended up with. i've built out a model for them as well, mostly for internal use. having a rigged 3d model as reference for a character you draw a lot (or plan on, at least) is extremely handy, as it turns out.

what am i planning next

i have a few short term goals in mind. one is to build out a little test level and really start dialing in the physics until i have something properly good feeling. another is to figure out the animations system and start setting up some placeholder animations. i also want to implement the systems to handle the powerups and maybe start prototyping a couple of the most fleshed out ideas for those. on the concept side of things i want to start doing some concept art for some of the environment design. i also want to compile a bunch of art and music that fits the sort of aesthetic that i'm aiming for. beyond that i'd like to start developing the narrative more, and the place to start on that is probably making more characters.

closing thoughts

i'm still very new to gamedev, i'm learning as i go on a lot of things. despite the frustrations though it's so far been a really fulfilling experience for me. i always kind of assumed i wasn't smart or talented or disciplined enough to ever make a game, and a part of me still very much insists that. but with each bit of progress i chip away on this, the more viable it seems to be. i feel like i'm writing these more for myself than anything, but hopefully some people will take interest in the project. please don't be shy about commenting and asking questions if you're out there, it'll make it feel a bit less like shouting into the void of the internet.

[morningstar-warriors]

Game Fifteen... And Others I haven't written something like this for...

So This is the giant turd pile list of all the stuff I have been working on since the last game... A lot of issues arrived, I'd received great feedback from different players. All wonderful, and time to take a sledgehammer to the preexisting stuff... Disclaimer, this post was initially sent to a playtest group so pardon its casual nature. I figured it'd be good to record it here as well.

Mad Rambling below:

Dice Pooling:

First off, still using six sided dice. So that hasn’t changed. I imagine you all know what dice pooling means, but just in case the short and basic of it is: the better your character is at something, the more dice they can roll. In this case, that would be your cat’s ability score + their skill = How many dice they roll. I explained this in a recent post that's probably more put together.

This has its ups and downs… Rolling a pile of dice, and counting the amount of numbers that pass a check, rather than adding them all up, feels a bit more player friendly. Especially for kids and noobs. It’s dead simple, a 6 is really good, a 1 is really bad. Everything in-between is up to how easy or hard a situation is.

Downs are, the way the game is at this point in time. You can have up to five points in both your ability scores and skills. This means you could roll up to TEN dice. That's a LOT OF DICE!!! Now, this could actually be super fun. The big roll. Who wouldn't love a huge roll? You’d feel so good at what you’re doing. The chance of reward feels higher... But, I can see it getting old and tedious if it's a commonly used skill.

Harm:

Rather than keeping track of HP and AC numerically, you now have little boxes to tick off. Honestly one of the worst aspects of D&D for me is all that honkin stinkin math. This gets rid of more math! YAY!

To better explain, Harm is a way to track how hurt a character is.

⬛Scrape (Mild damage) No debuff

⬛Bloodied (Blood is drawn, an active attack was made and landed)

⬛ouch - 1

⬛Oof ouchies -2

⬛Severe (Your cat is damaged badly, and needs medical attention.) - 3 dice to roll

⬛Fading (Your cat is dying, and needs medical attention NOW.) -4 dice to roll

Names of Harm still being workshopped…

Rather than an enemy dealing, say, a measly 4 damage. Now they deal 1 harm. If you reference our chart above, that means a cat is scraped. So they suffer no consequences– yet. Two more hits, and they could temporarily lose 1 dice from their dice pool.

With harm comes Protection. Instead of armor coming with an AC, it tells how much harm it deflects.

Really Rough Chart:

Fluffy – Grants 1 protection.

Thorn Armor – Grants 1 protection and 1 harm to an enemy.

Clay Armor – Grants 2 protection.

Leather Armor – Grants 3 protection.

Bone Armor – Grants 4 protection.

With this I am also working on the medical side of things, as one of the biggest playable classes– A Healer, needs to be able to enact their namesake.

Leveling:

Still floating in many “errs�� and “uhms” for me, but I want it to work through failure and RP. Like Harm, its boxes you tick off. Everytime you fail a roll, you get to check off a box, and get closer to leveling up. This lets people level fast– which is something I feel like DMs dance around way too much. Game progression feels way more fun and natural if your players level up fast. Seriously, try it. Also, I love the concept that failure leads to LEARNING. That's awesome.

RP is the part where this gets foggy. So you get to level with good rp? What the hell is good rp? Is that not subjective? Maybe. Dad and I agreed when everyone at the table is excited by another player’s actions– that's good rp. Influencing the DM, rule of cool, is good RP. So I know it exists, it's not completely nebulous.

I think offering a clear outline of what I mean may clear this up. I want to put a stress on interacting with, and helping your friends at the table. Character growth, interaction between players, participation from players, I think that is something that should be required in these games.

Skills:

BONUS UPDATE!!!!!

I added SIX new skills. Oooh ahhh! In my first playtester group, I had a very distinct issue called “Roll Ponder.” I said it over and over and over. Make a ponder check for me, ehh roll ponder, yeah ponder, you know what I’m gonna say… It became a meme. A groan and an eye roll. My head was in my hands guys.

So I remedied that, presenting, the newbies:

Chase

Cats are known to be quick, they can twist and change direction in the drop of a hat. A cat’s Chase Skill determines how fast and maneuverable it is. Sometimes a cat needs to get away from a threat in time, or rush after a fat juicy mouse. This check is best used in cases of speed, hunting, and evasion.

Endurance

In some cases cats may be doing strenuous tasks for prolonged periods of time. Or worse, they’ve eaten a dangerous herb. Endurance dictates how well they can handle being put under tough situations. Especially ones that strain them physically.

Tradition

The Tradition Skill puts to test how well a cat has been listening to their elders. This Skill is used to identify unique aspects of different Clans or outsiders. Aside from understanding different customs, cats use Tradition to recall old stories and Clan history.

Medicine

The world of Warriors is dangerous, and cats often get hurt. The Medicine Skill helps a cat know what herbs to smell for, or understand how critical someone’s condition is. Through these discoveries a cat can help alleviate pain or prevent death.

Faith

A cat may ask their ancestors for signs or an answer, the Faith Skill gives them a chance of being answered to. Certain cats have abilities gifted to them by Star Clan or the Dark Forest that could be tapped into through Faith. Other times they are being influenced by forces they wish to push away, or want to recall a detail regarding religious stories.

Speech

Speech shows how well spoken a cat can be. This skill aids in persuasion, and attempts to impress those listening. Cats who are particularly cunning use Speech to lie or manipulate others.

Link to all the skills here.

Now obviously not all of these were related to the ponder conundrum, but they felt like relevant additions that expanded the kind of actions a kitty cat could take.

TLDR:

Lots of updates that need some tweaking and play testing, it's time to play cats again.

[kdramabrainrotstation]

for the WIP game, the day the moths died sounds super intriguing... please tell me more

ahh thank you! it's...a huge wip. i'm still heavily planning out a lot of things about it, but i'm super excited to write it out once i've got it all sorted.

it's also a remake of an old fic i had started back in one of my old fandoms. i never got past the first chapter because i realized it didn't really...work for the characters in that fandom? but it honestly fits perfectly for tdj, and for the dystopian aesthetic of the show

it's gonna be super niche, though, so it probably isn't for everyone lol. it's also pretty self-indulgent. by that, i mean it's got elements of things that i personally find fascinating. concepts of alchemy (less fullmetal alchemist more haunting ground), homage to an indie game called 'inside', a detroit become human-ish plotline (actually that's the first fandom i was going to write this for back in 2019), the list goes on and on lol

basically, it takes place in the wake of a disaster that wiped out a great deal of the human population. in anticipation of said disaster, the united nations had come together in an underground project to create artificial human placeholders for jobs and other economic needs in order to keep society functioning as closely to normal as possible. they'd been steadily integrating these beings into society over the course of the past several decades, and following the disaster, sped the process up.

these artificial humans were meant to coexist with society fluidly as if they were human themselves, but giving something that was supposed to be more like a robot autonomy usually doesn't pose good results. not being given choices as to who they would be or what they wanted to do with their lives--simply expected to perform the task they were given at creation--these beings eventually rebelled. some of them violently, some of them running away. and as more and more begin to do so, governments all across the world are forced to act.

i'd like to point out here that these beings aren't robots or androids or anything like that. they're artificially-created humans. this is important.

in south korea, a special police force is created for the sake of tracking them down. they call them 'moths'--a blatant reference to them being considered a pest, and the fact that most of them have short lifespans. they also exist solely as an indirect aid to human reproduction.

enter kim gaon, a newly promoted detective, who is assigned to this group. he and his cohorts (you guessed it--soohyun and jungho) investigate reported sightings of escaped moths as well as places where people have been attacked by them. on one mission, gaon finds himself diving headfirst in a chase after one of the most infamous of the moths--a rogue from the early days, coined 'atlas'--and his view on society is turned on its head.

i'm gahan trash, so it's definitely going to be the main pairing.

i couldn't find a short way to explain this fic, and this still doesn't cover all of it. i do have a bit of the first chapter typed up, so here's a little snippet:

How do you feel during a storm? What do you think of when you see the violent flash of lightning? Hear the clap of thunder reverberating around you after? Are sheets upon sheets of thick, heavy rain chaotic? Or are they cathartic?

What is your perception of the things surrounding you? Do you tremble in fear and anticipation? Are they ominous—a sign of terrible things to come? Or are they opportunities? Can you latch onto them and change them into something that makes a difference for yourself and those around you?

Is it the end of the world, or is it a new beginning?

It’s strange, how such broad questions have always been posed to Gaon in small, square rooms. With politeness and anticipation, a quick bow, silent acknowledgement of the words being spoken to him. Pondering, wringing his hands in his lap, while his mind works to try and understand the purpose of what’s being told to him. As far as he knows, he’s never had need for a therapist, but the higher-ups insist on counseling—it’s a necessary part to being a detective in today’s world, they keep telling him.

And Gaon wants nothing more than to make a difference. So, mental health visits, whatever the station tells him he needs to do, he’ll do it. For that reason, he always tries his absolute hardest to bring reason into the questions the man typing away on his laptop is asking. He closes his eyes and breathes deeply—envisions a tempest of pouring rain and wind ravaging the city—and tries to understand his interpretation of it. Other times, he scans the bland gray-beige of the empty, lifeless walls in the small room and tries to make something more out of them. The colors are intended to be calming, most likely, but Gaon feels stifled more than anything. Still, he does as he’s told and insists to himself that in order to escape these four walls, he must handle this session correctly.

seems unrelated to all the description i put above, but it's actually super important. i won't spoil it, but these initial paragraphs are a HUGE foreshadow toward the route the story takes in the fic. things are not what they seem, and i'm hoping when i do manage to get this written out, y'all will enjoy it as much as i'm enjoying working on it.

but again, it's suuuuuuper niche. as you can probably tell haha

either way, thank you so much for this ask!

[bedtimebrain]

EXO Baekhyun: Speedpost!

(while i've been having fun with all these drawings in my past few posts, i must admit i almost puked when i looked at this one as i was uploading today. for the sake of our eyes will nicely put a stop to this soon :,D)

Char: baek x u Genre: military baek, fluff!, needy (?) reader Description: you thought you could do just fine with baek in the military, but it seems like you actually need him a little more than you think Word Count: 1.3k Track for feels: Avril Lavigne, Wish you were here

You honestly thought you were the kind of strong and independent girlfriend. The kind that would do absolutely fine when your boyfriend enlists.

But truth be told, you barely scrape past this week, and it has only been a week since baek enlisted. Doubts, doubts. Could you even hold it together for another 2 more weeks? You remember just the day before baekhyun's enlistment, he deliberately teased you with fake sobbings,

'babe, will you cry if i'm not around? you might miss me so much it's too much for you to bear right? if you..'

you simply scoffed and cut him off

'ya, byun baekhyun, i'm afraid i would have to disappoint you. i am very much a busy and independent woman. i will do just fine with you enlisting. plus we will probably get to call once in a while, i can live with that'

you smugly folded your arms, sending an attack to his ego

In hindsight, the attack went out like a boomerang and came right back at you. You can already imagine baekhyun playfully gloating

'Strong independent woman, jagiya?'

Perhaps it might all be better if a wreck package hadn't self-invited itself to your life this week.

First of all, your boss decided it was a good idea to throw your proposal back in your face. Next, your very considerate across-the-globe client planned a conference call close to sleeping time in korea. As if it all couldn’t be worse, you overheard a juicy conversation your colleagues were having about you in the washroom.

All these just made you want to run right to baekhyun. To lie on his lap, throw punches at him and hear him flame your life perpetrators with the most nonsensical phrases.

During the day, all you looked forward to was your phonecalls with baek. But who knew even a phonecall date would be as hard to fulfil as climbing mount Everest.

Apart from the first day, every other day the past week was met full of hiccups. Either you were caught up with conference calls and work, or baek was cutting too close to lights out for a long call.

You call it baek crumbs, yes you were surviving on baek crumbs.

There was still sometime left before your phonecall date tonight. You yanked open your refrigerator in search of your alternative destress mechanism -- chocolates. You sighed at your depleting chocolate stash, physically indicating how badly you needed baek.

Back on the sofa, you swallowed down Freddo and you plugged in your earphones like an emo teen, randomly choosing a song radio to play.

As if Siri heard your inner thoughts, the radio chose to play Avril Lavinge's Wish You Were Here. Before you know it, you were a crying mess.

It's not even like you guys were breaking up, but the lyrics were literally stabbing into your heart But right now i wish you were here.... Damn, what i'd do to have you here ...

You were pathetically brawling away when baekhyun's call came in. Suppressing your heavy sobbing, you picked up the phone after a couple of rings at this untimely moment.

'Jagiya, i've 15minutes today! How have you been? You wouldn't believe what happen today! Jagi? Are you there?' His animated voice died down and he held a pause.

'Are you crying? y/n why are you crying? what happened?' you hear a hint of panic in his voice

Baekhyun was fast at catching on things, your quietness, shakey breathes and suppressed hitches were more than enough to indicate a red flag to him.

You had intended for tonight's call to be a fun and not your emotional health hotline help. Taking a deep breath, you tried to put up a front, and with your most stable voice, replied him

'ya, what crying? so what happened with you today?'

'ya, stop bullshitting me. you're crying, what's up with you?' turning all serious, he wasn't going to let you dodge this

you bit down hard on your lip, you couldn't get a syllable out of your throat, afraid the moment you did so you would break down completely.

'damn it, i would totally break the law just to bring a camera phone in so you cannot hide your face from me. tell me please?' he sounded urgent and frustrated, but gentle in asking you to tell him

'baekhyun ah, i can't do this anymore. i thought i could, but why is it so difficult' your voice cracked and you burst into hot tears

'i haa-d such a bad week and i just want..want.. to tell you about it every night. but our time together is always so short that by the time it got to my turn to tell you about my day.........the call ends. and.. and.. i don't know..... what to do about all these on my own..with--without you' you were wailing and possibly incomprehensible by now

'ya..y/n-ie, mi an hae. jeongmal mi an. i just realised i hadn't even heard about how your day went this entire week. i always got so carried away telling you about me, i wasn’t considerate enough.'

Almost running out of tears, you regain your composure quickly

‘Jagi, I’m not blaming you. Please don’t take it that way, it’s just.. I really wish you were around.’

The call suddenly went silent on the other sides, then you heard some low shouts in the background

‘Baekhyunie?’ You guess it was probably an early roll call again

A few moments later, baekhyun was back on the call.

‘Jagi, I’m sorry, I’ll probably have to go soon, the sergeant’s checking my barracks next.

Anyway, I actually had something I wanted to give you the night before I enlisted, but you insisted you were an independent and busy woman....’

His sentence was left broken with a sudden series of clattering like his phone had dropped. You heard louder shouts this time round, then a hurried whisper from Baekhyun

‘Jagi, check the right drawer under your table alright. I got to go now, mi an.’

‘Ah, okay.. saranghae’ and the call was dropped.

You know it was beyond Baekhyun’s control when he had to end the call. But it still didn’t stop you from feeling down at the abrupt goodbye.

Forcing a smile on your face for the sake of your own, you went to your table as baekhyun had told you.

Right drawer under the table?

Pulling open the drawer to find a floral patterned metallic box.

Was baek referring to this?

Popping open the metal box you gasp at the contents scattered within. With a hand over your mouth, you could feel your eyes welling up with tears again.

Chocolates. Lots of chocolates. Fanciful chocolates. Notes... byun baekhyun actually wrote notes for you?

He never once made you cards no matter how hard you ‘jaebal’ for him to. He would just say

‘Too difficult’

‘Too bothersome’

‘Suck at handicraft’

You pulled out the longest note in the entire box and couldn’t help but chuckle when you saw his scrawls

Annyeong Jagi! I bet you would choose this to read first cause it’s the longest. Did I guess it right?ㅋㅋ i wrote a letter to my beloved EXO-Ls, and I thought, how could I not leave you with one? Y/N, you see the chocolates in this box? I went to the candy store that day and picked them individually for you. Because I’m not around, I thought you might need them more. If you have a hard time when I’m away, take a chocolate and a note, enjoy them and think about me. Thank you for waiting, nae sarang, very soon I’ll be with you again. ^^

On the table, your phone vibrated and your screen lit up.

A msg from baekhyun:

Found my speedpost? Saranghae, wool ji ma(dont cry). Let’s call again tmr, goodnight!

You were smiling and crying like a fool by now. With a vision blurred by your tears, you typed a reply

Ya byun Baekhyun. Gumawo.... saranghae

Surely, you must have saved a nation your past life for you to meet byun baekhyun.

———

I was watching EXO arcade and this super random thought came to mind, do yall think their new album concept actually came from EXO arcade?

Like maybe they had been planning a season 2 all along and a new album. But they couldn’t think of a concept, so tada! Arcade, games! For their album concept~ Is there any talk like this circulating, hahah, hope I’m not late to the party then.