#THEY FINALLY RECONCILED (twists into amorphous mass)

[nondestructiveprocess]

grian no longer visits out of hostility and longing, but just to spend time with him, even if he is still cage-y. scar finds himself content with that, now. he's missed this.

[talesfromthegameff14]

Trapped

Only twenty minutes to sleep

But you dream of some epiphany

Just one single glimpse of relief

To make some sense of what you've seen

Taylor Swift, Epiphany

[CW: Death, Body Horror, Violence, PTSD Flashbacks, Blood] ---------------------------------

Aya needed rest, but alone in this too large bed it was hard to come by.   Despite his desires, life ticked on.  Work had to be tended to, children had to be fed and cared for, sleep had to be sought, family obligations met.  It was the eternal cycle of things and he knew it keenly, felt it in his aching bones and speeding heart while drifting in the twilight of denied sleep.

Arden and C’ajnee circled his thoughts, others as well - mother, sister, father, master, failed... the others were easier to dismiss, sending them back to the reel of his life that played on in the rolling fog that was ever present.  The Grey that shrouded and held the pain of a Warrior’s lifetime in check, mists that crept closer with each setting of the sun ever since fears were given form by Oah in the Shroud.  Joy and anticipation had held them back for sometime now, but with the finding of joy came fatigue that seeped into his bones and made it harder to avoid the dark whispers left in the void’s wake.     How was it that his own shades held less bite than the ones of others?  Was it that they were better known? Or was it the natural outcome of tangling two souls together so tightly that they could never be unbound? Or were the wounds so firmly entrenched in his psyche that the ache was an old friend, to be welcomed instead of reviled?   The creeping numbness promised answers, like it always did.  But, when was the last time he actually found anything there but his life shown ad nauseum?   The realization that he couldn’t remember brought a bright flare of anger that ended up with blankets being tossed to the side with a violence that belonged on the battlefield instead of directed to a hapless pile of cloth.  Something tore in his frantic bid to escape the strangling confines of the bed that was too empty, too cold, too hot, far too much to consider lying in any longer.   A pair of pants was roughly dragged on, the neat braid of his hair wound at the nape of his neck to get it out of the way.  Or at least he planned to do such until he his hand scrabbled over the dresser in search of something that wasn’t there.  No worn silk ribbon kept close to tie his hair back, that was cast off too, like so many things that reminded him of... No, not that road tonight.   Thoughts shied away from that still healing wound while Aya took a moment to check on the children that slept in the other room.  He doesn’t linger like was his usual wont, eyes scanned over the not quite darkness to ensure that they were asleep like they should be, eyes abruptly focused on the empty crib where C’nekhii normally slept.  Empty?  It took a minute for the panic to get pushed away.  The babe was with Tolemy, that’s why the bed was empty nothing more. Satisfied that all was well, he made his way up the stairs, retrieving a seashell from the cabinet drawer and leaving it out by the door.  Gone to the beach, Terbish and Zareen would know not to panic if she woke up, know to call him on the linkpearl that felt like a too tight leash around his neck as it was considered.  Fingers twitched upwards towards a horn, but no other gesture was made to remove it.  This was the life he chose, love held him to it when little else could in this particular moment.   Escaping into the night air was a relief, Aya’s steps quickened into a flat our sprint for the short distance from his yard to the beach.  Once on the sand he pushed himself further, long strides eating up the fulms at a rapid pace until there was no more sand to cross.  Vaulting onto the rocks he kept going, not caring about the risk to his bare feet as he leapt from stone to stone with the half moon hanging above the Ruby Sea lighting his way.  

Not that there were rocks under his feet anymore.  No, it was softer under his boots as he dodged from bamboo copse to bamboo copse, stalking the defector that was his prey in the sweltering summer heat.  The hyur had caused many to die giving out information to the Empire, death would be too kind for him.  It took little time to find the man that was his target, but instead of hot gush of blood across the ground as Aya sliced his throat out, there was only the feeling of air against his fingers, no resistance of a blade across flesh as the bamboo faded into the grasslands of the Steppes.  

Confused by the change, Aya stumbled to a halt and then fell to his knees, reaching up to the pendant he always wore.  Fingers wrapped around the opalescent gem, gripping it hard enough that it strained leather thong it hung from and the sharp edges of the rough hewn stone dug into the scars on his hand, threatening to break through the flawed skin.   >”Please.”<, he whispered in xaelic, eyes scrunching shut in hopes to block what shouldn’t be from his sight.  

The images stay fixed within Aya’s mind, marched forward with the force of a memory not yet reconciled, the gathering of friends and found family under the stars by an altar deep in the woods.  The trees didn’t stay though, fading away seemingly at his quiet plea for peace.  The springy forest floor turned hard and unyielding under his boots, the expanse of sky grew until it showed the outline of the mountains that towered above the plateau was the only thing that broke the horizon of stars.  

Ghosts of a people fallen rose up from where they laid upon the ground, some the shape of xaela, others the shape of void creatures drawn from cracks in the ground that burbled up tainted earth that carried the scent of the grave.  The light of Nhaama’s tears illuminated much of the area, except an amorphous blob that pulsed and grew in the center of Aya’s view.   Giant and fishlike, then not. Alluring as only Oah could be, but then not.  Shrinking and reforming with tentacles that stretched out to grab, then not.  It was all of that in one as yols screeched their pain towards the stars, tearing rents in the sky as their broken and twisted forms took wing from where their desiccated bodies laid.  The beasts skeletons, exposed to the air, crumbled into dust that formed great wings that carried what remained away from the battle field until nothing was left of the majestic birds but their keening cries and the ash that shrouded the stars from Aya’s sight.  

The xaela and creatures of the void settled into a macabre parody of the fight that stole the light from Dunrai leaving only fear behind. The same fight that exposed the hunger within the Beast that fought by their side, a Beast Aya could do nothing about.  Instead the Uyagir could only watch helplessly as tentacles snapped out from the growing mass to engulf Tolemy from head to toe moments after Dunrai fell to a wave of darkness that turned his eyes silver and unseeing.  Paralysis gripped Aya’s body, leaving him vulnerable to the whims of his mind’s eye as his scream of anguish cut through the quiet of the beach at night.  

The Grey flowed from where it was denied, cascading outwards from the humanoid form the darkness has taken.  It coated whatever it touched in hoarfrost covering rock and fallen body alike, the crystalline structures decorating Tolemy from the tips of his toes to the ends of his pointed horns in slivered slivers that turned the man stiff and unyielding within the writhing limbs that held him.  The inky appendages flexed and strained until frozen flesh gave way in a splintering of ice, an arm and a leg tumbling to the ground before the rest of the body was flung away to slide across the rock until it thumped into Aya’s shins.  

“Never alone.”, is whispered from rime touched lips, each word gasped out as razor sharp shards that embedded themselves into Aya’s frantically beating heart, “Find your peace.  I’m sorry.. my.. sorry... Sajanavaa.”, the last words spoken in the exhale of Tolemy’s final breath, the slush of half frozen blood oozing over Aya’s feet far too slowly for the heart to be beating any longer in the miqo’te’s unmoving chest.

“No, no... you promised. You promised.”, falls not from Aya’s mute lips, instead it’s echoed from the few mangled bodies that still battled within the blanket of ash of the fallen.  Each of the malformed corpses turned to face the Uyagir, chanting the litany that babbled incoherently within the frozen xaela’s mind.  

“You -he promised.” “We failed.” “Never alone.”  “Do not regret.” “Promised, forever alone.” “Friend.” “Gone.” “I’m sorry.”  “Never alone.” “Find your peace.”  “You -he promised.” “We failed.” “Never alone.” “Do not regret.” “Promised, forever alone.” “Friend.” “Gone.” “I’m sorry.” “Never alone.” “Find your peace.”  

The words grated unceasingly within Aya’s mind, each syllable repeated faster and faster while the broken remains crumbled into dust where they stood.  It wasn’t until the last withered husk joined the Grey that swirled over the rock of the plateau that the cacophony stopped, leaving a silence so brittle and still that a whisper could fracture it into bits.

It wasn’t a whisper that brought it to an end, but the heart wrenching sobs of a man who has seen too much horror to not break with the stillness that he shattered.  The fancies conjured by a mind that has endured more than it could finally fading in the presence of unrelenting grief.  Only then could the warm wind that carried the scent of distant grasslands respond to Aya’s earlier plea, voices long lost to history doing what they could to bring the man out of his pain and back to what was real once more.  

Trembling arms wrapped around himself, Aya tucking his chin into his chest as he rocked back and forth on his knees, desperate for any comfort he could find on the rocky Hingan shore. Tears flowed freely, dark and inky as the marks on his cheeks, plopping thickly on the rocks where it gathered in a viscous puddle of shadow upon the rocks.  It wasn’t until the tears dried up, leaving exhaustion interrupted by the occasional bitter sob that the voices from the scintillating stone were clear enough for Aya to hear.   One breath at a time the man came back to himself, guided by the ones that walked the path of Seers ages past, ones that understood what it was like to be lost within what was and what was not.

Eventually his breath turned steady and the shuddering of muscle diminished into something manageable allowing him to tip hazed eyes towards the clear night sky.  The blur of stars was blinked away, a last bit of darkness trailing down from his eyes unnoticed to join what already collected upon the rocks.  It was then that Aya was able to haul himself up onto his feet, unsteady steps taking him back up the beach towards safety, towards love, towards home.  

Viscous liquid quivered then flowed downwards towards the waters of the Ruby Sea, disappearing into the rising tide but not dispersing within the salty waters.  The coalesced horror of Aya’s pain floated restlessly within the churning waters until it sensed warmth greater than the sea.  “Prey”, whispered instincts that shouldn’t exist, the blob turning flat and extending outwards like a net of shadow that captured the shark whose fate was sealed as the taint seeped through the bulging eyes and sand-papery skin.  Teeth extended, fins grew spikes, and an unnatural hunger gripped the beast.  A hunger that would drive it to fishing villages in the days to come, terrorizing any who dared step within the waters it called home.   [C’tolemy belongs to @ala-mhinyan; Zareen belongs to @yzareenxiv]