#Sorry if this wasn't up to what you wanted

[navybrat817]

Chokehold

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: You have a crush on Bucky and start to bond with him over coffee in the break room, but there's no way he could possibly feel the same way about you... right?

Word Count: Over 11k (yep!)

Warnings: Explicit sexual content, unprotected v. sex (wrap it before you tap it!), dirty talk, fluff, longing, minor angst, insecurities, feels, sparring, swearing, confessions, getting together, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?)

A/N: I've been sitting on this one (thanks for listening to my back and forth on this @targaryenvampireslayer), and I hope you all enjoy. ❤️ Beta read by the lovely @mumbles411, but any and all mistakes are my own. Dividers by the talented @enchanthings-a. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

You fell for Bucky Barnes the moment you met. Something dangerous lurked in his steel blue eyes when you introduced yourself to him, but beneath the surface was pain and loneliness that you wanted to take away. Of course, that could've been you projecting and wanting to justify having a crush on a guy who hadn't spoken a word to you.

“Bucky,” was all he said to you, entrancing you with the deep baritone of his voice.

You wished you could say it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship, but you could count on one hand the number of times he spoke to you in the months that followed. You tried not to take it personally. Maybe he wasn't interested in making new friends since he seemed to stay close to Steve, Sam, and their small group. Or maybe he just didn't see a reason to trust you. Trust likely wasn't easy for him and what reason did he have to open up to you?

“Hi!” you exclaimed when Bucky walked into the break room, your echoing voice making you wince. “Sorry. I didn't mean to greet you at that decibel.”

“It’s okay,” he said, your eyes on him as he strode to the coffee machine with ease.

Bucky wasn't your friend, but it didn't stop you from greeting him whenever you saw him throughout the building, a warm feeling spreading in your chest every time he acknowledged you with a slight head nod or grunt. That had to mean something since he didn't outright ignore you. Not being his friend also didn't keep you from learning little things about him, like how he took his coffee.

Which you decided to surprise him with today.

“Wait! I made you some coffee,” you told him, going to get the mug you had ready for him. “I hope you like it.”

You had a reputation around S.H.I.E.L.D. for being kind to others ever since you joined. You didn't mind that being your signature since you liked putting a bit of kindness out into the world. Besides the tough work you did, your coworkers and teammates fought other battles every day that you knew nothing about. So why not try to lift others up? It costs you nothing.

Being nice, however, had a downside or two. Some thought that kindness was insincere or a weakness. It also didn't get you a lot of dates. Or maybe you didn't pay attention to other guys since you had eyes for one man.

You couldn't get a read on him as you carefully handed it to him. “You made me coffee?” he asked in disbelief, a soft look in his eyes before he blinked it away.

“Yep! With cream and sugar.”

Your smile faltered when he raised an eyebrow and glanced suspiciously at the liquid, like he was trying to assess if something was off with it as you wrung your fingers together. “This is really for me?” he asked.

You couldn't detect any anger or annoyance in his tone, but you wouldn't say he sounded happy either. Which only made your smile fall more. “Yeah. I just, I thought you liked it that way and maybe it would help you kickstart the morning, but I shouldn't have assumed. I'm sorry. And you don't have to drink it. I can just dump it out,” you rambled.

He held the mug a bit closer when you tried to take it away, the steam rising from it as his eyes met yours. It was almost as if the heat melted the ice from his stare. “Not gonna let you dump this out after you went to the trouble of making it for me,” he said, gently blowing on it before he took a sip. You reminded yourself not to whimper when he licked a drop away from his lip, wondering just what else he could do with that tongue. “Especially since you know how I like it.”

You avoided his gaze, hoping he didn't question why you knew since there was a chance you’d blurt out that you like him and that was the last thing you needed. You owed him some sort of explanation though, right? “Well, we’re both here some mornings and I saw you make it that way,” you said, your brain overanalyzing how that sounded. “Not that I'm watching you or anything like that. I… I’m not a creep.”

Bucky stared with unreadable eyes as you sighed and shook your head. Leave it to you to fumble over your words with your crush. Was that why they called it a crush? Because it crushed your hopes and dreams?

In a small voice, you said, “I was just trying to be nice.”

“It’s a very nice gesture, so thanks,” he said, taking another sip. “I appreciate it.”

Doing your best not to preen like a peacock at the renewed sliver of hope, you released the breath you were holding and nodded. At least he didn't question why you cared enough to remember how he took his coffee. “You’re welcome,” you said, wishing you could hang around and chat more, but you had work to do and didn't want to smother him. “I hope you have a good day.”

“You, too,” he said, his eyes on you as you headed toward the door. “Maybe I’ll see you here at the same time tomorrow?”

You came to a stop, your heart thudding as you faced him. “You… want me to make you coffee tomorrow?”

He chuckled before he took another sip. “I meant maybe we would just bump into each other, but I won’t turn down another coffee if you’re offering.”

Of course that was what he meant. “Oh. Right. Yeah. Maybe,” you said, backing up and hitting your elbow against the doorframe.

His brows furrowed as you gave him a strained smile. “You okay?” he asked, your cheeks hot as you rubbed your elbow.

“I’m fine! Enjoy your coffee,” you said, wishing the ground would swallow you up as you bolted from the room.

You were a competent agent. A strong woman on top of your kindness. Why did you have to act like an idiot in front of him? There was no chance you’d see him in the break room after that. It was a shame, too. It was the most he had ever spoken to you.

A higher being either took pity on you or wanted to play a trick on you since you did see Bucky the next day. Not only that, no one else was in the break room. Granted, most people used the main break room since this room was much smaller and on a floor most didn't go to. But how was it possible that you were so lucky?

“Morning, Bucky.”

“Morning.” He hesitated before he took a seat at the same table as you. If you were dreaming, you didn’t want anyone to wake you up. “Sorry. I should've asked…”

“It’s fine,” you smiled. “You're welcome to sit with me.”

“Thanks.” His cheek twitched and you wondered if it was a nervous tick or something leftover from the hell he endured. “You know, that coffee yesterday was probably the best I’ve ever had from this place.”

You perked up more. “Really? Wow, thanks. It was nothing,” you smiled, your pulse quickening. Not only was Bucky talking to you again, but he complimented you. It was slightly pathetic how much you enjoyed that. “You did say you wouldn’t turn down another coffee if I offered. Would you like one?”

“Sure,” he replied with a smile. He actually smiled at you. It was a good morning. “Thanks.”

“You know, you have a really nice smile,” you complimented him, proud that you said the words without your voice cracking.

“You think so?” He leaned back in his seat and you tried to move around the room like normal as his gaze followed your movements. “I think it scares some more than my glare does.”

You busied yourself with getting his coffee ready, the urge to defend him rising. “There’s nothing scary about your smile and anyone who says otherwise can deal with me.”

“They can deal with you, huh? Awfully kind of you.” His chuckle was so unexpected that you almost dropped the mug. The small talk was unexpected, too, but you weren't about to tell him to stop. “But you’re so sweet. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you glare at anyone.”

“Oh, I can have resting bitch face when I want to,” you teased before your heart skipped a beat. He looked at you enough that he hadn’t seen you glare at anyone? He thought you were sweet? No, it was probably just an offhand comment. “And I wouldn’t just glare at anyone to defend you. I can fight, too. Words or fists.”

“You’d fight for me, too? You really know how to flatter a man.” His gaze warmed before some of the usual strain reappeared, your heart lurching at the sight. “But you shouldn’t have to fight for me.”

You took a seat across from him again once you set the mug down. “Why not?”

“Because you just shouldn’t.” He shrugged. You recognized that he was closing part of himself off and you weren't about to kick open that door. “If I’m being honest, I’m kind of shocked you’re talking to me.”

“And why’s that?”

He tapped a finger against his mug as he considered his words. “I haven’t really said much to you since we met, but you’ve still been nice to me. Always saying hi and smiling. And now this,” he said, gesturing to the coffee. “Some people have ulterior motives when they do nice things for no reason, but I don't get that feeling with you.”

“There are people who have ulterior motives. You’re right about that,” you agreed. The world could be a dark place with terrible people. “And I guess that's one of the reasons I try to lead with kindness. Putting a bit more optimism and joy into the world might not make it change overnight, but it could make a difference to someone.”

“That makes sense,” he said, his brows pinching. “But why continue to be nice to me when I've been standoffish with you? I don't think I deserve it.”

You let the words sink in. You expected Bucky would be apprehensive of people in general when his autonomy was taken away from him for so long. Trust couldn’t be easy. People had to earn it. What you didn't expect was that he didn't think he deserved your kindness.

“Everyone is different. We all have various personalities and comfort zones. Some people hit it off right away and others don't. Some need a bit more time to open up,” you answered, an earnest smile on your face. “I guess I figured you fell into the latter. Even if you didn't, I wouldn't take it personally or hold it against you. I hope you know that.”

Bucky may have had you in a chokehold, but he didn't owe you a thing.

His shoulders sagged as he let out a breath and you wished you could wrap him up in a hug. “Thanks for being so understanding.” He observed you with a thoughtful gaze. “And you are right about one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“Your kindness made a difference for me yesterday. And you’re really easy to talk to.” He smiled, genuine affection in his eyes as your heart raced. Was it possible to faint while sitting? “I don't usually talk this much anymore.”

“I’m glad it did. You can always talk to me, you know. I’m happy to listen or even give advice if you want it,” you said sincerely. It meant a lot that he took the time to speak to you today, and if it were up to you he’d only have good things in his life going forward. No one deserved that more than him. “And if I’m ever too much for you, don't be afraid to tell me.”

His brows pinched again. “Too much? How?” he asked, his tone not as light as it was a moment ago.

You tensed, gripping your mug as you mulled over past things you heard from others. “Well, I’ve been told before that I’m too perky and too optimistic some days. That my kindness is fake and it can get on people’s nerves,” you explained carefully, swallowing a little. Yeah, you had a reputation for being kind, but some didn’t care for it. “Not that I think you would find me annoying or anything like that. It’s just how it is for some people.”

“So because you choose to be nice instead of acting bitter or rude people don’t like that?” Bucky looked at you with a mix of confusion and anger. “What the fuck is wrong with them?”

You were utterly silent from his reaction. Your heart also fluttered because he seemed upset on your behalf. “So many things, I’m sure,” you teased, hoping to make him smile a little. It was nice when he smiled at you. “But it’s okay. Really. It doesn't change who I am. I'm still going to be me.”

Cheesy, but true. You couldn't control the actions and emotions of others. You knew in your core who you were and you would continue to put that energy out into the world.

His jaw ticked, but he gazed at you with what you guessed was admiration. “Kind and steadfast,” he whispered, making your heart swell all over again. “Listen. If anyone around here does give you a hard time, will you let me know?”

The determination in his eyes took you aback. He went from hardly speaking to you to opening up a bit and now wanting to look out for you. It was nice, to say the least. “That’s okay, Bucky. You said I didn't have to fight for you, so you don't have to for me.”

“I want to.” He reached forward and hovered his hand over yours. Before he touched you though, he pulled away. You longed to know what his touch felt like. “Please?”

You couldn't resist his gaze. “Okay, but only if you let me know if anyone gives you a hard time.”

“Yeah. I got a name for you. Sam Wilson,” he deadpanned.

You burst out laughing, covering your mouth so the sound wouldn’t echo in the room or bother him. “Oh, Sam. I’ll give him a talking to,” you teased, your cheeks aching from how hard you were smiling.

“I made you laugh,” he pointed out softly, almost in disbelief. It was another moment where you wanted to wrap him up in a hug.

“Yeah, you did.”

“Wow,” he whispered, smiling before his face fell. “Fuck. I have to go.” He went to stand, but paused to look at you. “Do you ever go to the main break room?”

“I prefer this one,” you said, lightly tapping the table. “It’s quieter.”

“Me, too.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Um, maybe I’ll see you here again tomorrow? Same time?

Warmth spread in your heart at the hope in his eyes. “Yeah, I’ll be here.”

You’d always be there if he asked.

For the next several weeks, seeing Bucky in the small break room became part of your normal morning routine. You made coffee for both of you before you sat together and talked. Some chats were casual, while others went a little deeper. Both ends of the spectrum helped you get to know each other.

He spoke fondly about a cat he found in an alley and took into his home. He named her Alpine and even showed you a photo of her on his phone. It tugged at your heartstrings seeing the ball of white fur curled up in his metal arm. How could it not?

Bucky spoke about Steve and Sam and how they tried to meet up once a week for dinner. They took turns picking the place. It was nice that he had them to lean on. Both men were always friendly toward you, but you noticed they seemed to smile at you even more since you and Bucky started talking. You assumed they were happy that their friend had someone else in his corner.

“Steve is a punk and Sam is worse,” he said once with nothing but affection in his eyes.

He explained that he was in therapy, which he wasn't ashamed of. He had no reason to be. It was a work in progress, building trust not just with the therapist but building trust within himself. He didn't get into specifics regarding what they talked about as it wasn't your business to begin with, though he did casually throw in that he had trouble sleeping some nights. You mentioned that you sometimes wrote your thoughts and feelings down if they got too loud. He told you the next day that he got himself a new notebook to try that out and you had a spring in your step the whole morning.

You didn't talk about anything particularly exciting. You told him that you didn't have a lot of family close by, but loved your job because you got to help people in some capacity. And that you enjoyed reading and watching movies when you stayed at home, but also enjoyed going out with a couple of close friends. Bucky didn't need to know that they loved teasing you about your crush. You mentioned little things, too, like how you needed to go shopping soon for a new sofa and how you hoped to see the new science exhibit at the nearby museum.

The bulk of your conversations took place in the break room, minus occasionally bumping into him around the building which didn't leave much time for chatter. It wasn't a bad thing. It was nice just to talk to him.

And while you didn't think any of the topics you brought up were interesting, Bucky listened intently every time, his eyes on you as he hung on your every word. The attention felt nice. Though you hadn't mustered up the courage to ask him to hang out outside of work, it felt like the two of you were friends because of those mornings together.

Maybe he thought you were friends, too, since he asked one day, “Do you know anything about dating apps?”

You almost spilled his coffee, but quickly recovered and avoided his concerned gaze as you sat down. “Um, no, not much. I haven’t really used them. I haven’t dated in a few months either,” you answered honestly, hoping your tone didn’t sound as bitter as the taste in your mouth. You weren’t embarrassed by your romantic status, but your heart sank just the same. “Are you… Why are you asking? Just out of curiosity.” It wasn’t your business, but it was the first time he brought up anything concerning dating or relationships.

“Sam mentioned setting me up and I brushed that off, so he mentioned using a dating app. I don’t know.” He shrugged as you hung your head.

Something settled within your chest, a heavy feeling that made it difficult to take a steady breath. But you couldn't feel sorry for yourself. Bucky was kind, good looking, and trying to adjust to a sense of normalcy. Of course he’d want to try dating again and what kind of person would you be if you didn't support him?

“Well, I can help you research some apps if you’d like. See if any may be a good fit?”

“Really? You’d do that?” he asked softly.

Your eyes drifted up and you did your best to smile. You couldn't let him see that the mere thought of him dating someone else hurt you. It was pathetic. “Yeah, I would,” you answered. You refused to let your crush on him stop you from helping him if he wanted to meet someone.

Bucky stared at you for a few seconds and you almost squirmed in your chair. “But you said you haven't really used them. Why not?”

The unexpected question did make you squirm. You couldn't blurt out that he was one of the reasons. “Well, not to be a downer or anything, but some apps almost seem to set people up for rejection. It just isn’t possible to match every single person up. And there’s also rapid judgment with some based on appearance and it makes it easy to objectify people,” you explained. It was sad, but true. “It does work for some and I’m happy for those people, but I don't know. I’d rather just meet someone and…”

“Connect with them naturally?” he guessed.

“Yeah,” you said, a sad smile touching your lips. “Is it wishful thinking to want something like that?”

“I don’t think it is at all. In fact, that’s a good reason why I probably won’t use an app,” he said. You hoped your sigh of relief wasn’t audible, but the weight lifting from your shoulders felt palpable. “Besides, what would I say if I tried to set up a profile? ‘Hi, I’m a previously brainwashed assassin over 100 years old’?”

“It would be a conversation starter,” you teased, the playful banter bringing a warm smile to his face. “And I know I brought up rapid judgment, but I’m sure one look at your profile picture and people would line out the door just to get your attention,” you smiled and gestured to his face, but his gaze dropped, a flicker of vulnerability crossing his features. “I’m sorry. I…”

He shook his head, and you caught a hint of a smile that made your heart flutter. “No, it’s… It’s kind of nice to hear that,” he admitted, his gaze drifting away like he was lost in thought. “Dating came easy to me years ago and I don’t think I really appreciated it back then. The thought of trying again is a little scary.”

His voice was soft, almost reflective, as if he were speaking more to himself than to you. You felt a swell of empathy for the weight of his past. “Well, whenever your next date happens? I hope they know how lucky they are,” you said, your heart aching to convey how deserving he was of genuine connection.

You just wished that connection was with you.

The warm smile returned to his face as he gazed at you. “Thanks,” he whispered.

Your heart ached in your chest. “Anytime,” you whispered back, quickly standing up before tears pricked your eyes. “I should get to work. Have a good day, okay?”

“Oh. You, too.” He looked like he wanted to stop you, but he hung back. It was all in your head anyway. He didn't want to stop you. Why would he?

You wiped your eyes once you were out of the break room. Rushing away was cowardly and you knew it. It was silly, too.

You wondered if the coffee talks would continue once he found his dream girl. Would he tell you about her? Would bile rise to your throat when he sang their praises or smiled a soft smile not reserved for you? You had to stop thinking about it. You couldn't fall apart just because Bucky wasn't yours, and it was something you’d need to come to terms with when he found someone else.

And maybe tomorrow it wouldn't hurt so much.

Bucky looked a little tired when he joined you the next morning, not saying a word. He still offered you a smile. You didn't speak either, but you gave him a small smile in return.

The night before, you wrestled with the idea of telling him how you felt. All you had to do was get the words out. But the words froze in your throat like ice and you kept quiet, both of you sipping your coffee as the seconds passed by.

You almost wanted to fill the void with more chatter, but it didn’t feel necessary. The silence was oddly comforting. Silence was also safe. He seemed content just to sit there with you, and you were afraid you’d blurt something out that you couldn’t take back.

“Did I do something to upset you yesterday?” he asked suddenly. His gaze was so gentle, yet deep, looking for an answer you couldn't fully give him. “You rushed out without finishing your coffee, and you always finish your coffee, so I had to have done something.”

Your heart breaks from his words. Rushing off made him think it was his fault, and you never wanted to imply that. “No, you didn't upset me,” you replied. That was true. Bucky didn't do anything to upset you. It was your own mind and feelings that did that. “I just had work to do.”

He didn't look convinced, and you couldn't blame him. “You sure?”

“I’m sure.” You put a smile on your face, but you felt terrible. “And I don't think you could do anything to upset me.”

“Then you wouldn't mind sparring with me tomorrow morning by any chance, would you?” he asked.

You inhaled, not expecting him to ask you that. “You want to spar with me?” You discreetly pinched yourself, testing to see if you were dreaming or not. He was asking you to hang out with him outside of the break room. Kind of. “Really?” you added, your heart racing when he nodded.

“Yeah. What do you say?” he asked. Oh, it was a bad idea to spar with Bucky Barnes. Not because you couldn't learn from him, but what the hell were you going to do to reign in your sexual frustration? “Unless you're busy.”

“Yes!” you blurted out quickly, clearing your throat as you tried to regain some of your composure. You swore his cheek twitched like he was trying not to smile. “I mean, no, I'm not busy. I’m totally free and I'd love to spar with you,” you said, praying you sounded normal and not like some lovesick woman with an overgrowing crush.

Which was exactly what you were.

But you weren't about to turn down a chance to spar with him. Who in their right mind would? How many times had you imagined him slamming your body against the mats and pinning you down? Both of you breathing heavily, his face shining from the perspiration. You were thankful the super soldier couldn't read minds because now all you could think about was him tearing your clothes away and spearing you open with his cock and-

“Okay then,” he said, finishing his coffee before he took the mug to the sink. “Second floor gym. Room 2. 6 am.”

“6 am. I’ll be there,” you promised, gazing after him as he walked toward the door. “See you then, Sergeant.”

His entire body went rigid before he looked back at you, the metal fingers of his left arm twitching. Your heart sank, worried that you said something wrong. Would he take back his offer?

You stood up from the table. “Bucky, I-”

An agent walked through the door and bumped Bucky out of the way. At least he tried to. The super soldier didn't budge.

“Excuse me,” Bucky said.

“Watch it,” the agent sneered, bumping his shoulder again. He still didn't budge. “Think you're special because you got some serum in your veins and Rogers wanted to save your ass? You’re nothing.”

You gasped. You could handle people saying things about you, but people you cared about? It made you see red. How dare this guy say anything like that to Bucky?

“Nothing but HYDRA’s little bitch.”

Bucky glared and looked about two seconds away from smacking the guy across the room, but he hung his head after a second and didn't breathe a word. Maybe he didn't want to make a big deal out of it or didn't think it was worth it. You, however, wouldn't put up with it. Not for a second.

“Hey! Agent asshole,” you snapped, marching over until you were between Bucky and the agent. “Apologize to him.”

The agent cackled at you and you heard Bucky’s metal fingers curl. “Apologize? He was in my way.” He reached out a hand to pat your head. “But it’s kind of cute to see you defending the Winter Soldier. That's-” You grabbed his wrist and twisted it. “Ow, fuck!”

“And now I’m in your way,” you said sweetly, twisting a bit more until his knees buckled. “Apologize, now.”

“Fuck, fuck, I’m sorry!” he shouted.

Bucky had a look of awe on his face when you looked back at him. “It’s okay,” he said above a whisper.

You released the guy and pointed at the door. “Whatever you need you can get it later,” you said, satisfied when the agent scrambled out the door.

Bucky stared at you when you faced him, silence hanging in the air. “You okay?” you finally asked. Was twisting the guy’s wrist too much?

“I…” Bucky blinked rapidly and cleared his throat. “You defended me.”

“Well, yeah. I told you if anyone gave you a hard time they could deal with me,” you smiled. It didn't matter how small the matter was, you’d stick up for him. People like that guy often mistook your kindness for weakness. “And what he said was completely out of line.”

“Thank you.” His fingers reached out and touched yours, sending a jolt of electricity through your body. “Really. Thank you.”

“Don't need to thank me,” you said, giddy from his small touch. “And, listen, before he rudely interrupted, I was going to ask if it bothered you that I called you Sergeant.”

You thought you saw his fingers twitch again, but he shook his head. “No. I… kind of like hearing that from you.”

“Oh.” You dipped your head to hide your smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow then? 6 am?”

“Yeah, you will,” he said softly, meeting your gaze as you lifted your head again.

“Have a good day then, Sergeant.”

He inhaled sharply. “Don’t be late tomorrow,” he gruffly spoke before he left the room without another word, hearts in your eyes as you stayed rooted to the spot.

You mentally jumped for joy from how excited you were. You couldn't keep the smile off your face the rest of the day. Bucky could've asked anyone in the building to spar with him, but he chose you. And he stuck up for you because some guy bumped into you. Now you just had to make sure you wouldn't make a fool of yourself in the morning.

Easy enough, right?

You spent more time than you cared picking out the perfect exercise outfit. It didn't matter what you wore since he only asked you to practice with him. It wasn't like he asked you out on a date. Still, you were hopeful that the matching black set would make him look at least once.

If anything, it was a confidence booster for yourself since you liked how you looked in it.

“Confidence is sexy,” you smiled before you grabbed your bag to go.

You got to the gym in record time, not wanting to be late or keep him waiting. Nodding to a few people on machines before you made it to the second floor, you had to pause and take a breath before you entered Room 2. The air was a bit cooler in the sparring area, which was good considering you’d likely work up a sweat.

Dropping your bag near the door, you nearly jumped when you spotted Bucky a few feet away staring at you. “Right on time,” he said, your throat dry as he nodded to the mat. “I stretched before you got here.”

“Hey,” you said, removing your jacket, the zipper loud in the quiet room. You gave him what you hoped was a nice smile when you went to the mat. “Shouldn't take me long.”

The Sergeant stood against the wall with his arms crossed as you began to stretch, one foot pressed against it as his eyes slid over to you. Quickly averting your gaze, you tried to concentrate on warming up instead of how good he looked in his workout gear. While his sweatpants hung low on his hips, the dark short sleeved shirt clung to him like a second skin. He had his hair pulled back, too, which only enhanced how bright his eyes looked under the ceiling lights.

You refused to get aroused just from looking at him.

Too. Fucking. Late.

“You good? You don't seem as chipper as usual,” he said.

“Yeah, I…” What were you even going to say? That his mere presence in his current attire made you wet? “I didn't have my coffee before I left, so no caffeine. This might wake me up.”

He didn't seem convinced, but he nodded after a moment. “I know the feeling,” he said with a soft smile. “Thanks for joining me so early. And sorry if it threw off your routine.”

“Nothing to be sorry for. Morning exercises are good for the mind and body,” you said, standing once you finished stretching. He probably had a full schedule ahead of him. “I have to admit though, just like you were surprised I was nice to you a while back, I'm a little surprised you asked me to spar with you.”

“And why is that?” he asked as he approached the mat, all confidence as he took his spot.

Your throat went dry again before you cleared it. “Because someone like Steve is more evenly matched,” you said. Super soldier to super soldier, you could go for hours. “And chances of me beating you are also pretty slim.”

Way to downplay yourself.

“You nearly brought that agent to his knees yesterday and you didn't break a sweat.” His head tilted a fraction, his eyes carefully taking you in from head to toe. “You don't think you can take me?”

Your next breath came out in a rush. If you didn't know any better, you would've said he asked that on purpose. Oh, you had imagined Bucky telling you how well you'd take him, but not like this. You'd take what you can get.

“I can take you,” you stated.

You could only describe the look in his eyes as feral as he got into position. “I'm sure you can,” he said, your only warning before he rushed at you.

Blocking Bucky’s hit, you told yourself not to smile and focused on dodging another hit. He had advantages on his side, like his strength with the serum in his veins, but you were determined to show him that you were a worthy opponent. You also knew he wouldn't try to harm you. Anything he threw your way would be to help you improve.

Bucky grinned when he blocked your kick and you almost let it distract you. “I think you're giving me a run for my money,” he said before he performed a back full twisting layout to dodge another kick. Was that the proper term? Whatever it was, the move was more agile than you could comprehend.

“And I think you’re showing off,” you teased, extending your leg for a sweep instead. You huffed when he flipped away again. “Either that or Steve’s theatrics have rubbed off on you.”

“Don't tell him that. Wouldn't want him to get a big head,” he winked.

The back and forth went on for a few minutes, your breathing heavier and heart racing. Part of you wondered if he was pulling punches for your sake, but he didn't let up. It was exhilarating. You hoped he asked you to spar with him again.

“Tell me something.” Bucky brushed some of the loose hair back with the back of his hand, both of you panting lightly as the motions stopped for a second. “Why are you single?”

Your eyes widened at the question. “W-What?” you breathed, almost losing your footing as you stepped back. Why would he ask you that and why now?

“You told me why you don't use dating apps and you want to make a genuine connection, but you haven't mentioned anyone special,” he shrugged, tilting his head when he stepped forward. “You know you can tell me if there’s someone you like, right?”

“Maybe we can have this conversation when we’re done sparring?” you suggested. It would give you a chance to collect yourself.

He shook his head. “No, I think we should have this conversation now, if that’s okay.”

“I guess. If you insist.” You blocked his swing, barely. “There’s… someone I like, but I don’t know if he feels the same way.”

His cheek twitched, like he wasn't expecting that answer. “Who is he? Do I know him?”

That question threw you off a bit more. Why did he want to know who? “Yeah. Yeah, you do,” you said.

“Is it Steve? Sam?” he pressed, a hint of anger in his eyes. “Some other agent?”

“No, no, and no,” you replied, sighing as you dropped your arms. “Listen, do we really-”

Bucky swept your legs out from under you. The air left your lungs when your back hit the mat and he settled over you before you could get up, pinning your arms at your side. You tried to twist out of his hold and couldn't even use your thighs to roll him off you since he had those pinned, too.

“You let your guard down,” he said.

“Yep,” you said, the word clipped as you tried to look anywhere but at him. It was impossible. He was everywhere.

“Now this guy you like,” he started with a tilt of his head. He wasn't letting this go, was he? “If it’s someone I know and he isn't Steve, Sam, or another agent, who is he?”

You bit your lip, wishing you a chance to hide or bolt.

“Tell me,” he begged, his eyes staring into yours. “Please.”

Oh, God. Did he have any clue how you felt? At the very least, could he sense how he affected you by laying on top of you? How hard your nipples were against your top or the wetness that gathered between your thighs?

Now wasn't the time to focus on being horny.

He sighed when you didn’t speak. “Answer this then: Is there even the slightest chance that it’s me?” he asked, the question hanging in the air between you.

“I…” You swallowed hard as he waited patiently for your answer with an expectant gaze. He was so close and the position was too vulnerable, but you had to bite the bullet and tell him the truth. “It isn't a slight chance. It's one hundred percent you.”

“What?” he whispered.

Super soldier hearing, he should've heard you perfectly clear, right? “I like you, Bucky. I care about you. I pretty much have since I met you,” you finished, the quiet admittance making your chest burn.

It was out in the open now and no longer suppressing your feelings was a good thing.

He stared straight into your eyes, your heart picking up a notch. “You like me?” The weight of him left your thighs, but you couldn't breathe when he settled between them. “At the risk of sounding like an arrogant prick, are you single because you’ve been waiting for me?”

“Yes,” you whispered, swallowing again. “And you aren’t arrogant. Far from it.”

“So, every morning we’ve had coffee together and even before that, you cared about me? And when I brought up the dating app a couple of days ago and you offered to help me, you had feelings for me? And when you defended me?” He tilted his head further when you nodded. “And you didn't say anything until now?” It didn't feel like an accusation, but your eyes welled up anyway.

“Yes, the whole time. I didn't want to tell you and make things weird if you didn't feel the same way and I would've rather have you as a friend than nothing at all. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” you rambled as a tear slid from the corner of your eye. You weren't trying to deceive him by keeping your crush on him a secret. “We are kind of friends, right?”

The two of you hadn’t hung out outside of work, but there was something there. At the very least, there was a comradery. After this, who knew if he’d even want to speak to you again.

“I don't want to be your friend,” he said with conviction, your heart shattering. It was like he punched you right in the gut and maybe you deserved that. He smiled softly, something beautifully tragic when you struggled beneath him. Why wasn't he letting you up? “Wait, no, no. That’s not what I meant.”

You went limp when you couldn't break his hold. “Then what do you mean?!”

“I want to be so much more than that.”

“You…” the rest of the words died on your lips because what did he say?

A metal finger moved down your cheek, the touch cool against your warm skin as he wiped another tear away. The finger then tipped your chin before his mouth descended on yours. You weren't sure why you expected it to be a rough kiss, but it was anything but. His lips teased yours along with his tongue, coaxing you to open your mouth to his. It was demanding in the gentlest of ways.

It wasn't a rushed kiss either. It was thorough, slow, like he had nowhere else in the world to be. Did he have any idea of the spark he ignited within you? It was something hot, needy, out of control. Fire raced through your veins. You'd go up in flames if he kept kissing you like that. Like you meant something to him.

“I care about you, too,” he whispered. You inhaled sharply when he trailed kisses along your face. “I’ve liked you since we met.”

“You have?” you asked.

“Yeah,” he smiled, kissing the corner of your mouth. “I hoped you might feel the same, but I’m a bit rusty when it comes to this and I couldn't get a read on you when I mentioned the dating app. I figured this approach might be better.”

“Well,” you gasped when you felt something hard pressed against you. “It worked,” you said. You were glad he took the leap of faith.

“I’ll always remember the first time you smiled at me. I won't let anyone take that memory away from me,” he groaned against your skin, your eyes tearing up again. “And the way you stuck up for me… I don’t deserve you. I don't know if I ever will.”

“Don't say that,” you begged when he released your other wrist, giving you the chance to wrap your arms around him. “You deserve every bit of happiness.”

He smiled as his kisses moved down to your neck and you could only whimper when he licked and sucked over your pulse. “You're so caring. So good,” he said, rocking his hips forward. The sweet words combined with the sensual movements of his body fueled your desire. You also bit your lip to keep from bursting into tears from his praise. “And you're so beautiful, you know that? Inside and out.”

“You keep talking like that, I’ll keep crying,” you tried to joke.

He lifted his head to wipe another tear away. “Happy tears?”

“Very happy,” you promised, shifting underneath him and brushing his crotch again.

His mouth fell open as his eyes shut. It was one of the sexiest looks you had ever seen. “If you keep doing that, I’ll embarrass myself,” he said in a strained voice.

“Is that a bad thing?” you smiled innocently.

“Maybe not. I have a quick rebound rate if I do,” he teased, frowning when your smile slipped. “Shit, are you okay? Did I say something wrong?”

“I’m fine. You didn’t say anything wrong,” you promised, touching his cheek. “I just… Am I dreaming?”

His lips touched yours again, You would’ve melted into the mat if you weren’t already underneath him. “You’re not dreaming,” he whispered. The groan he let out when you moved beneath him again reminded you that he really was settled between your legs. And hard. “I wanted to take you out on a nice date before I even touched you, but I don’t know if I can wait. You’re driving me crazy.”

Well, nothing had happened quite yet. Just a confession of feelings. And some kissing. And grinding.

“You’re driving me crazy, too, but if you want to stop, I understand,” you said. It didn't have to go further if he didn't want to, especially since it was fast.

His forehead touched yours. “Do you?”

You nearly shouted that you didn’t want him to stop, would never want him to stop, but this wasn’t just about you. “I don’t, but I get it if you do,” you said. You were kind of in a public place and consent went both ways. If he was the slightest bit uncomfortable, you were fine with stopping.

It seemed to be all he needed to hear since he kissed you again, eagerly licking into your mouth. Your heart was still racing out of control, the high from the exercise running through your veins. You wondered if he felt that adrenaline, too. If the confession of your feelings was the water against the dam, admitting that you wanted him physically, too, was the thing to break it.

“It’s just… I don’t…” He lifted his head to look around before he smiled. “Wait, hold on.”

He pushed himself up, your body cold from the sudden lack of heat. The tent he sported in his pants sent a surge of pride through you as he went as gracefully as he could to the door. Locking it, he went to his bag next and dug out a towel.

“What are you doing?” you asked when he came back quickly.

“Trying to be a gentleman,” he smiled, lifting your hips to place the towel underneath. “Sorry, the mat’s just kind of dirty and I think you deserve a little better than that.”

“You certainly are a gentleman,” you smiled back.

“The things I want to do to you are far from gentlemanly,” he said, reaching for the waistband of your pants and peeling them down with your underwear. You were sweaty and gross, but if he didn’t care, you wouldn’t either. “I wish I could lay you out and kiss every inch of your body.”

“Maybe after I shower,” you teased, both of you chuckling as you helped push his pants and underwear down. Once all was said and done the two of you could talk and figure out a date and him properly taking you to bed, but having him take you then and there was perfect. “Oh…”

Words left your mind when you saw his hard and heavy cock. A bead of precum dripped from the head and you wished you could have a taste. There was a good chance he’d split you in half, but it would be worth feeling him for days on end.

“Bucky, please,” you begged, opening your legs more as an offering. You didn’t care if it made you look desperate for him, which you were. You just hoped it looked enticing.

With blown pupils and a small growl, he shook his head. It was enough to make you want to cry. “I need to stretch you first, sweetheart.”

The term of endearment made you smile even when you argued, “I don’t need you to stretch me. I can take it.”

He narrowed his eyes, but gave you a smile, too, as he brought his hand to your scorching heat. “We’re both desperate for this, but I’m going to stretch your pretty cunt to make room for my cock. Got it?”

Shivering at his tone, you nodded. “Yes, Sergeant,” you answered, biting your lip when you saw his cock twitch. “You really like me saying that, don't you?”

“Yes,” he groaned. You’d have to keep calling him that in and out of bed then.

He rubbed along your folds slowly, like he was memorizing the feel. Deep down, he was a gentleman. Badly wanting you, but making sure he wouldn’t hurt you. What more could you ask for?

“Can I confess something?” he asked gently as the first finger sank into you, gently exploring. Gasping at the welcomed intrusion, you nodded. He could say anything he wanted. “I've imagined you just like this,” he stated, pulling his finger out before pushing it in deeper.

“You have?” you asked before he pushed a second finger in, both of them curling slightly. It sent sparks of pleasure down your spine.

“It almost felt wrong because I hadn’t even asked you to go out with me, but I couldn’t help myself.” His voice was huskier as he pumped his fingers, your hand fisting in his shirt. You throbbed with need, a kind of need you couldn’t ever remember feeling. “I wondered what kind of sounds you’d make and how you’d feel around me if you ever let me have you.”

More heat pooled in your core as you spread your legs wider for him.

“Making such pretty sounds for me already. And your pussy, it feels like heaven. Might even make me see God once I have my cock in you.” He glanced down to watch his fingers slide in and out of your tight passage, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Fuck, you’re so warm. And tight. And wet,” he continued, an almost cocky smile on his face when his thumb swiped over your clit and drew a small whimper from you. "Guess I haven’t completely lost my touch.”

“That is both hot and…” you had to pause when he added a third finger, making you stretch around the digits. He was going to be the death of you. “Is it bad if I’m a little jealous because I don’t want to think about you touching anyone else?”

Something sparked in his pretty blue eyes. “Does my girl have a jealous streak?” He slid a fourth finger in, your back arching with a small cry. “I’m flattered, but you have nothing to worry about. You’re the only one I want.”

Your breaths were shallow from his touch alone, but the sweet words got under your skin. “You don’t have to worry about anyone else either,” you exhaled. He knew you weren’t seeing anyone, but you felt the need to assure him. “And I like that.”

“Like what?”

Your hand twisted in his shirt more. “The idea of being your girl,” you managed to answer, your body writhing as he moved his fingers in a beautifully torturous motion. “Enough, Bucky, please.”

“Enough what?”

“I’m stretched. I’m on the pill. Just… put your cock in me, please!” Panting by the end of your begging rant with mist in your eyes, you added, “Can I at least touch you if you won’t fuck me?”

The beautiful bastard had the nerve to laugh when he took his fingers out. “Kind and steadfast, even when you’re begging to get fucked,” he said, his eyes slipping shut for a second as he licked the first two fingers clean. “I promise you can touch me later if you let me get a proper taste of your sweet cunt.”

Your cheeks got so hot it shocked you that you didn’t catch on fire. “Yes, please,” you whispered, the promise of later making you quiver.

The room felt like it was spinning when he stared down at you and licked his fingers again. He kept his eyes on you when he wrapped them around his cock and guided it to your waiting hole. You tried to calm the beating of your heart when he slipped the blunt head in, but you were powerless to do anything but feel as he kept pushing in. You trembled and gripped his shoulders once his hips were flush against yours, throbbing around his thickness already when hadn't started thrusting.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he gasped, dropping his forehead to yours again as he trembled, too. “I need…” he breathed against your lips. “I just need a second, please.”

“Okay,” you whispered, wondering if he was as overwhelmed as you were. Maybe moreso. You weren’t sure exactly how long it had been for him. And being enhanced, you didn’t know if the sensations felt different or stronger. You just hoped he felt good. And happy.

His metal hand framed your cheek, so gentle in contrast to the damage he could do with it. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” you smiled, tilting your head up to kiss him. “I can take it,” you promised. Your body had adjusted to his size and now you wanted him to move, to feel all of him.

He finally began to thrust, moaning against your lips. You lifted your hips, trying to take him in more. The hand on your face slid down your body before it moved to your hip, keeping you in place so you could feel him nice and deep. He pulled his cock out almost completely before he thrust back in, making you cry out as you quivered around him. You wanted to soak his cock, consume him the way he was consuming you.

“You’re taking me so well,” he praised as you bit your lip. “No, lemme hear those pretty sounds. C’mon,” he said, changing his angle slightly so you moaned loudly. He moaned, too, as he kept thrusting. “There you go. So beautiful.”

You wanted to scream for him. You also wondered what it would feel like to have his hand around your throat or over your mouth to smother those very sounds if you ever snuck off during work to fool around. There were so many things you wanted to try with him.

“Bucky,” you whined, digging your nails into his shoulders as he moved faster. Piercing pleasure built from your core and spread slowly throughout your body. You felt like you couldn’t breathe from how good it felt, how he felt.

The intensity in his turbulent eyes was similar to when he listened to you talk in the break room, but with much more heat. Had he looked at you like that all along? “Wanna mark you up one day. Let everyone see that you’re my girl,” he grunted, dragging his mouth from your face to your neck. He lightly bit down, smirking when you whined again. “Would you let me?”

“Yes,” you moaned, tilting your head to give him more access. You’d feel so proud to wear his mark. There wouldn’t be any shame if people saw or asked because you’d get to say you belonged to Bucky.

“You feel so fucking good,” he rasped, surging into you over and over, the sound of skin-on-skin echoing off the walls with your cries. “Sweetheart, I’m not gonna last.”

The term of endearment again. It had your heart clenching along with your pussy. “Neither am I,” you breathed, bringing his head back to yours. You framed his cheeks, ecstasy close to crashing over you. From the strain in his handsome face, he was on the edge, too. “Come with me? Mark me up inside?”

It was a question and not a demand because you wouldn’t demand anything from the man who somehow stole your heart.

Through the pleasure twisting his face, he smiled. “Come with me.”

The heightened pleasure crashing over you was powerful enough that you almost screamed, your walls spasming around him. Shudders wracked your body as your breath ceased, trying to hold his gaze as the heat engulfed you. Your release coated him, just like you wanted it to. And it was only a few more thrusts from him before he tipped over the edge, filling you up in return. You both marked each other in the best possible way.

You laid limp beneath him, both of you panting. Your slick, wet heat still burned around him as released your hips and pushed himself up, a bead of sweat from his skin dripping onto yours. You gazed at each other, something tender passing between you. You wished the moment didn't have to end.

He leaned back down to nuzzle your nose and you couldn’t help but giggle breathlessly at the affectionate move. “You okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you replied, still dazed. “You?”

“Better than okay,” he said, smiling when you tucked some of his hair back. He looked good like this.

“I don't think I can move,” you teased.

“We have to, sadly,” he sighed, sliding himself from the warmth of your body. You whined at the loss, your hole clenching around nothing as your mixed release seeped onto the towel beneath you. “I know, but in case the next group that uses this room gets here early, I don’t want them to see you with your pants down,” he told you as he sat back and looked over you. You took a moment to look over him as well, getting a glance at his glorious thighs. You longed for the chance for you both to truly explore each other’s bodies. “And we could both use a shower.”

You inhaled when he used the clean part of the towel to gently wipe you both down. “Mmm. Together?”

He chuckled, helping you pull your underwear and pants back up. His hands lingered on your hips and you were two seconds from shoving the fabric back down. “If I get you in the shower, we won’t make it to work on time.”

“I don’t mind being late.” You tried to lift your arms to help him pull up his pants, too, but he beat you to it. It was a shame he had to cover up. “Or we could call in? I still have a lot of days off to use.”

“Yeah? You want to call in?”

“Yeah,” you said eagerly. Too eagerly. “Maybe?”

You almost shrank in on yourself when he raised an eyebrow. He told you he cared about you and he sure as hell just fucked you like he craved you, but you didn’t want to come across as clingy, especially so soon. The two of you still needed to figure things out.

And what if the things said were just from the heat of the moment? You weren't sure if your heart could take it if he walked away without another thought. He wouldn't do that though, right?

His gaze softened, helping you sit up, his face inches from yours as he rubbed your arms. “Hey. What’s the matter?” he asked, your heart in your throat when he smiled again. “Was I that bad?”

“No, not at all. You were amazing, holy shit, and telling you how I feel was long overdue,” you promised, his smile softer. “It’s just…”

His brows pinched. “It’s just what?”

You took a breath. “I've wanted to hear for so long that you had feelings for me, too. And now that it’s really sinking in, I guess I still feel like I’m dreaming a bit. That none of this happened,” you admitted, placing your hand on his chest. His heart was still beating fast, like yours. “That tomorrow I’ll just go back to being the girl who has a crush on you and nothing more.”

“What?” His face slowly fell. Why did you open your mouth? “No, that's not going to happen.”

“We just went from work friends to whatever just transpired, and I don’t want it to be too much or too fast for you or for you to regret this,” you blurted out, biting your lip hard. “I don't want to be too much for you,” you added in a whisper. Your insecurity surfaced more as the post-sex haze faded and you wished it hadn't. “I’m sorry. I don't know why I’m ruining the moment.”

It was stupid. Where had your optimism gone? He told you he cared about you. He gazed at you like you meant something to him. It was everything you wanted, so why were you questioning it?

“You didn't ruin anything.”

“Are you sure?” you asked softly.

Bucky placed his hand over yours, the other going to the back of your head so you couldn't move away. “I’m sure, now listen to me: Whatever is going on between us isn’t too much and you are not too much. You are never too much,” he said with fierceness akin to a growling wolf. “I want you and I want to be with you. I wouldn’t joke about that,” he assured you, your lips tugging in a small smile. “I get feeling like it's a dream, believe me, but it isn't. It's real and what just happened was real.”

Hearing him declare his feelings again made your heart soar. “I know you wouldn’t joke about that,” you said. He wasn’t cruel. He wouldn’t toy with your feelings like that. “I just want you to be happy. You know that, right?”

“I do and I am happy,” he said, his eyes full of longing. He experienced so much pain and loss and deserved happiness. “I’ve lost so much of my life, so much time, and I don't want to waste another second. So believe me when I say I want you to be my girl.”

A sob threatened to work its way up. “Oh, Bucky,” you whispered, your head dipping down before he lifted it back up.

“That connection you’ve talked about wanting, I feel that with you. I trust you. That’s why I’ve been able to open up to you. The person who made me coffee and offered me kindness and understanding and just let me be me,” he said, making you smile more. You wished you could wrap each word around your heart. “I want to hold your hand in the break room and kiss you in the halls. I want you today and I’ll want you tomorrow and the day after that. And the only thing I regret from any of this is not asking you to be my girl sooner.”

His words, his stare, his touch, they healed the senseless wound your insecurity put on your heart. “I’m yours.” You surged forward, your lips crashing against his. He sighed before he returned the kiss, likely feeling the same relief you had. You wished you could put into words how much his assurance meant, but you hoped your kiss expressed it. “Thank you for both coaxing my feelings out of me and assuring me that you want this.”

“Anytime.” He brushed another kiss across your lips. “You know how you said you hoped the next person who dated me knew how lucky they were?” he asked. You remembered. “I'm the lucky one because you’re taking a chance on me.”

“You’re a smooth talker.” You had no clue how you kept the tears at bay. It meant everything that he wanted to be with you. “I think we’re both lucky.”

He smiled at that. “Yeah, but I still don’t deserve you,” he whispered, kissing you again before you could argue that he was more than worthy. “So, you want to spend the day with me?”

“Yeah, I do. We can go on a day date or just talk some more at my place or yours,” you answered, not feeling the need to hide anymore. “That’s not too much to ask, is it?”

“Sweetheart, you just let me fuck you on a sparring mat. You can ask me for anything you want,” he smirked, catching your face between his hands. “But this day date doesn’t count as the nice date I want to take you on. My girl deserves something special.”

Your heart tightened in your chest, your emotions starting to run high again before you took a calming breath. “Then how about after that shower we call in, go to a cafe, get a cup of coffee, and figure out that date together? Maybe I’ll even convince you that you do deserve me.”

He huffed, taking your hands and helping you both up. You’d never be able to look at a pair of sweatpants again without thinking of what transpired there. “Okay, but I’m warning you right now that I probably won’t like the coffee.”

“Why not?”

“Because you didn’t make it,” he smiled. “Maybe we can check out that science exhibit you mentioned.”

You giggled. He remembered. “That would be nice,” you said, leaning close when he slipped his arm around you and guided you toward your bag. “You know, I can make more than just coffee. Just say the word and I’ll cook for you,” you said. You’d love to cook him a nice meal.

“Word,” he deadpanned.

You giggled again. “Later,” you promised. You’d make him something special. “Do you think Alpine will like me?”

“She’ll love you,” he promised, giving you a sheepish smile. “I told her all about you. And I think the last few dinners with Steve and Sam all I talked about was you.”

“You told your cat about me? You're adorable,” you smiled. It was really sweet. “And… Will Steve and Sam be happy?” They were his friends and you hoped they approved.

“Steve will be thrilled.” He huffed again. “But Sam’s opinion doesn't matter. Fuck him.”

With a teasing smile, you asked, “Wait, I thought I was supposed to give Sam a talking to. Are you offering for me to fuck him?” You shrieked when he growled and picked you up, placing you over his shoulder. “Bucky!”

“You’re not fucking anyone but me. You’re my girl and I’ll mark you up to prove it if I have to,” he said, keeping a firm hand on you as he carried you away. “But for now, let’s shower before we call in.”

“Yes, Sergeant.”

Bucky didn’t have to prove anything. He had you in a chokehold from the start and always would. And you were proud to finally be his girl.

Woohoo! You made it! I like to think this reader has bits of Smartie and Mrs. Barnes, and she deserves her man! I know these two will have wonderful times ahead! Love and thanks for reading. ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[invoncible]

FAILSAFE ✧˚. 00 / PROLOGUE There's only a handful of people with the skillset to raise a gifted child.

knock, knock

Debbie stopped in her tracks. She just closed the door on a potential nanny who was, unsurprisingly, working for Cecil. Was he so desperate to keep tabs on her and her family that he would send these poor employees to wait at her door day in and day out?

She rolled her eyes as she turned around, walking back to the front entrance. He could send as many as he wanted. She wasn't going to budge—and she'd show him by sending away the next agent he put on her doorstep.

"Hi! I'm April Howsam, here for the nanny position?" The woman greeted cheerfully. "This is my aide, Y/N."

You peeked out from behind your mentor, offering a small wave and polite smile.

Debbie's tired eyes darted between you both but before she could put her foot down, April spoke up.

"Before we begin, you should know that Cecil sent us. Now, I wasn't supposed to tell you, but I think it's unacceptable to mislead a potential employer." April clutched her files close to her chest, her brows furrowing. "Especially one looking for someone to take care of their child."

Your gaze landed on Debbie's face, studying her shock with a hopeful heart. A moment of silence passed, but it wasn't uncomfortable or awkward, rather... like an understanding was being shared.

"Please come in." Debbie stepped back, her eyes holding onto a shred of suspicion but clearing the way for you and April to enter her home nonetheless.

You both smiled at her as you shuffled in, the scent of a clean home infiltrating your nostrils almost immediately. Everything was in place—pillows, rugs, art... It was clear Debbie ran her home diligently.

The door clicked shut behind you, Debbie joining you in the foyer. April handed her the file with your resumes.

"As you can see, I have extensive experience working with gifted children ranging from newborns to late teens." April explained as you rounded the corner.

Your eyes lit up upon seeing the baby in question; the cutest little grape-colored boy crawling on the ground. Your lips broke into a smile, mouthing a little hi! and fluttering your fingers in his direction.

He raised his head to look at you, tilting in confusion slightly before crouching lower to the floor like a lion cub about to pounce. He pushed himself up to his feet and returned his efforts to his excursion across the living room.

"So you know that Oliver is..."

"Half Thraxan, half Viltrumite." April answered. "I also know that Nolan Grayson is Oliver's father, and your son, Mark, is Oliver's half-brother."

"You've been thoroughly briefed, I see." Debbie's eyes lifted off the pages in front of her to glance at you and your mentor.

"Yes, we have," April turned to you with a warm smile, reaching an arm around your shoulder and bringing you into the conversation.

"And—I'm sorry, what's the purpose for both of you?" Debbie asked.

"Thraxans are known to grow quickly. I can foster Oliver's learning and mental abilities just fine, but he'll need someone younger who can keep up with him should he want to play outside, for example." April gestured to you. "Which is where Y/N comes in."

"Ah." Debbie's head tilted in acknowledgment, her lips pursing in thought.

"While I don't have the experience April does, my whole life has been centered around taking care of kids." You piped in, glancing at April for reassurance. She nodded kindly.

Debbie raised an eyebrow. "How old are you?"

"19." You answered quickly. Debbie's face fell just a smidge but you quickly continued, "Finished school at 16, spent the years since learning April's trade. You can rest assured I am well equipped to handle Oliver."

Confidence restored, if only a little bit, Debbie smiled. April waved to Oliver as he approached you.

"My philosophy on child-rearing is simple. Encourage a child's natural curiosity," April bumped your shoulder, handing you a teething toy and nodding towards Oliver. "while giving him structure and a safe space to grow."

You swiftly caught up to him, gently holding onto his wrist before he pulled out a pair of scissors from the plant pot. He whined, but you dangled the toy in front of him as a peace offering.

"How about this one?" You hummed. He grabbed it without any fussing, ditching the scissors. You watched him waddle away with a small smile and handed the scissors back to Debbie.

"I also play a mean lullaby on the ukulele." April joked lightheartedly.

Debbie sighed, putting the scissors away at a safe height before dropping onto the couch. "I appreciate your honesty. I just don't want a GDA agent in my house running interference for Cecil on how to raise Oliver."

"There's only a handful of people in the world with my skillset." April flattened her hand over her chest emphatically. "And I'm choosy with who I pass those skills onto. This allows me and my mentee freedom from government oversight. We work for you, Ms. Grayson. Not Cecil."

"You're the boss." You emphasized. Your attention was drawn to Oliver who was sat at Debbie's feet, toying with the teething ring.

"Mama boss." He chirped, twisting to look at her. Debbie instantly smiled, scooping him up in her arms.

"See? Oliver knows who's in charge." April's eyes closed as she laughed brightly, leaning back slightly in her chair. You couldn't help but go awwww at the endearing sight. You had worked with many kids over the last three years, but none as young as Oliver yet.

Debbie smiled, a low sigh passing through her lips. "Let's do it."

[]

Debbie left you both to your devices, deciding to take a meeting with her company to see how she could integrate her way back into her full-time schedule. She still kept a close eye on you, setting up on the kitchen island while she took calls.

"Alright." April cooed, pulling the coffee table out of the way to free up more open space in the living room. "What do you say we assess your abilities, Oliver?"

He babbled happily and April chuckled sweetly as she pulled out her checklist and notepad.

You sensed a break in Debbie's meetings, getting up and strolling into the kitchen area. "Do you mind if I grab a glass of water?"

"Oh, not at all. Help yourself." She smiled over her computer, fingers clacking away at her keyboard.

You thanked her, opening the fridge and pouring a glass. The fridge door swayed shut, revealing Debbie on the other side. You jumped slightly at her sudden appearance, eyes snapping to where she was just sitting.

"You're the same age as my son, you know." She began.

"Yes," You answered smoothly, refilling the pitcher and shelving it back in the fridge. "Mark Grayson. Invincible's a pretty big name right now."

"Ugh, I know." She groaned, a bitter glare focused on the floor.

You cast her a quizzical look before she quickly shook her head of her frown, clarifying, "I'm so happy for Mark, really. But I just worry sometimes. He's working so hard, and Cecil doesn't make it any easier for him—"

You laugh softly, calming her ranting to a stop. "Oh, believe me. I get it. Cecil doesn't make anything easy for anyone."

She smiled appreciatively. "It's so... refreshing to have people I can talk to about all of this, even the GDA."

The Graysons were a popular name at the GDA, what with Omni-man's betrayal, Mark's penchant for attracting the worst kinds of enemies, and now the new baby. You were well aware of Debbie's situation, her burden—it was one of the reasons you jumped at the offer for this case.

"Like April said, we don't work for the GDA and we have a wide skill set." You leaned against the countertop beside her. "Whatever counseling you need, or if you just need to vent, I'll listen. Nothing leaves this house."

She paused, considering your words. Debbie was smart. Even smarter to be naturally distrusting of anyone who is a part of her or her sons' lives. You and April were convincing enough, though, to make her lower her guard just a little bit.

"Yeah." She whispered, eyes creasing with a genuine smile. "I'd... I'd like that. I tried something and... it didn't really work out." Her face drooped, her waterline growing glossy as she recounted trying her luck with the support group.

Her moment of reminiscing shattered when her phone buzzed. "Uh... another time. Rain check?" She chuckled, rounding back to her station and answering the call.

"Of course." You smiled politely when she met your eyes, sipping from your glass.

You wondered how long it would take them to find out you're lying through your teeth.

[]

Mark wanted to drop dead after spending hours trying to do the exact opposite. But no—he negotiated with Cecil for a few days off so he could spend time with Amber. He wasn't going to crash when he had to prepare for their date tomorrow. He wouldn't forgive himself if he slept in.

Dusting off his sweater and pants as he flew back home, he quietly slipped in the back of the house. It was dark, as expected. His mom was usually asleep during this time, Oliver included on a good day.

It seemed to be a good day.

He wiped his shoes on the mat at his feet, trudging into the kitchen for a quick snack before bed. He had to be up early if he wanted to beat the crowds at the Comic Convention.

He froze when he heard Oliver's sniffles. His head twitched to the side, tuning out the low buzz of the fridge to listen in. He heard a voice—light and sweet, comforting, but most definitely not his mother's.

Panic snaked its way around his heart and tugged, his breath short as he bolted up the stairs. He stood tensely in the hallway, peering into his mother's room to see her untouched bed.

His brows furrowed as he burst into Oliver's room. "Oliver—?"

You and Oliver both flinched at the sudden intrusion, staring up at Mark with saucers for eyes. Oliver giggled happily, reaching out for his brother.

Mark lunged forward. Not to embrace his brother, no—his hand curled around your throat instead, driving you into the wall behind you.

You gasped sharply, eyes screwing shut as the force knocked the wind from your lungs. You clawed at his arm, feet kicking helplessly with nothing to stand on. "Wait—"

He hovered over your squirming body mercilessly, squeezing to watch you splutter.

"Who are you?"

© invoncible

[writingamongther0ses]

"Oh my fucking god."

Lucy tried for a smile as the Blue Queen, the gentle queen of love and compassion, swore and kinda just...collapsed in her throne. "I'm sorry?" she squeaked. "It...it's just..."

The Red Queen had called Lucy cute. And adorable. And had pressed her shapely figure against her, her red lips so teasingly close...

Yes, she was technically an evil demon queen who had been alive for centuries, but... she really wanted that reward.

"This is exactly why we stopped summoning teenage boys!" the Blue Queen slammed her hands and stood up. Considering she was barely older than Lucy, it wasn't as intimidating as she clearly wanted it to be. "I thought-"

Lucy leaned back as the Blue Queen loomed over her, raising up on tippy toes for that extra bit of height. "Well, uh...you didn't really think of lesbians?"

The queen paused. "...what?"

"I mean, girls into girls, that-"

The Blue Queen was leaning in before she could think.

The Red Queen had only teased, dominate and sexy. The Blue Queen actually kissed, soft and gentle despite her rage.

Lucy felt her eyes go wide, all the blood rushing up to her face.

The queen pulled away before she could really think of how to react.

"...I hope that changes your mind."

"Let me put this in a way you'll understand: you may have summoned me, but the evil queen is like really hot, and my moral compass is very hormonal."

[vivwritesfics]

A single mum and an uncle pretending to be a single dad. What could go wrong?

Oscar piastri x you

"Uncle Oscar!"

Kian Piastri ran over to his uncle,a beaming smile on his face. His hands were cupped, holding something.

Oh god, what was he holding?

"Hey, buddy," Oscar said, leaning forward. The park bench had long since become uncomfortable, sitting there while Kian played. His phone had stopped being entertaining and he had started to grow hot and sweaty in the full sun.

Kian opened his hands. His fingers were covered in dirt, in the grooves of his fingers and under his nails. A little, pink worm wriggled around in his palm.

"Kian! Go put it down," Oscar cried and pointed to the grass.

"No." He was a stubborn, little shit. "He's my friend."

Oscar's expression softened. "Buddy, he wants to be in the grass. Can you put him back for me?"

Kian pulled his hands towards his chest. "But he's my friend." His lip wobbled. But then he crouched down and placed the worm back on the ground.

That was the thing about little Kian Piastri. He loved bugs. Worms, snails, spiders, roaches. Anything with a strange little face. But Kian put the worm down and ran back towards the playground.

She strode towards him, clearly exhausted. Throwing herself onto the other side of the bench, she looked towards the playground. Hands shoved into her pockets, Princess backpack hanging from her arm.

Tired, but she was still pretty. Pretty in that effortless way, in the way that suggested she didn't need to bother with all the bells and whistles. Not that she had time for the bells and whistles.

A mum, Oscar decided as he glanced at her.

She blinked rapidly and stared at the playground. Oscar risked swinging his legs towards her. "Sorry if this is forward, but are you okay?"

Her head lulled towards him. "Is it really that obvious?" She asked and wiped at her eyes. "Sorry, yeah," she said. "Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you for asking."

"No problem."

They existed in a peaceful silence for a few minutes. Just until two little ones came towards them. She sat up as a little girl, her spitting image, cane bounding her, Kian following.

"Mummy, can Kian come over for a play date?" The little girl asked, holding her mothers knees.

Kian climbed onto the bench beside Oscar. As soon as he did, Oscar pulled his fruit snacks from his bag and handed them to Kian.

She pulled her little up and sat her in her lap. "We'll, 'melia, we'll have to check with Kian's papa first," she said and pulled her daughters hair back into a ponytail.

Amelia, that was her name. She had a dangerously sweet smile that Oscar had seen Kian wear.

Kian opened his mouth to say something, to reveal the truth. To tell her that Oscar wasn't his father, that he was just an uncle.

Oscar clamped his hand over Kian's mouth. "You know what? We'd love a play date."

Bringing his back in blurb form! No plan, no word count goal, just vibes

[thepitlanepress]

THE HEART WANTS WHAT THE HEAD HATES –

↳ lando norris + ex!gf!reader

⌗ :: masterlist

⌗ :: a/n: i've had this one sentence running around in my head and decided to write an entire fic off of it so enjoy! (also the last part of the smau will be out soon!!)

the tension between you and your alarm clock right now is something the poets could write about.

it was set to go off at six am and you accordingly had woken up at five-fifty-eight.

so the last thirty seconds of your life has been filled with unimaginable tension. who will cave first, you or the alarm clock? the alarm clock obviously, you were happily content to sleep through it - which wasn't going to go down well, seeing as you'd be late for work.

but maybe that would be good too, so you wouldn't have to see him.

you wouldn't have to look at his stupid face or his hair or his smile as he walked through the halls of the mclaren hq, blissfully unaware of you and your inner turmoil.

you hadn't seen lando norris in person in two years, which is surprising seeing as you both worked for mclaren.

you hadn't seen him ever since you walked out of his apartment and left your life and heart in tatters as you did so. since the night he watched you leave, when he didn't stop you, when he let you walk out of his life, leaving him in pieces.

you had thrown yourself into work, making your way around the globe for races but putting yourself in every situation where lando wasn't, ignoring your stupid heart, and living with your head. if you had listened to your heart, you would still be fighting that day.

wishing he called.

wishing he stopped you.

wishing you hadn't walked out.

wishing you understood what you had done.

but you're not, because you've moved on.

you had moved on.

lando had run away from the situation as much as you had, not showing up to hq unless absolutely necessary and if he did always taking the long route, same in the garages. at that point in your lives he had memorised your schedule as much as his own and used that knowledge to avoid you at all costs.

you couldn't blame him though, it was your fault.

he wanted to tell the world you were together and you didn't, your solution? don't be together. in retrospect it was the worst decision you'd ever made but you like to pretend it wasn't and focus on moving on.

clearly you did well... adjacent. you didn't want to burst into tears whenever you saw him anymore but you also couldn't shove down the burn that wraps around your heart every time you think of him.

today's terrible moment, as you liked to call any interaction you couldn't avoid with lando, was when you stepped into the boardroom and crashed into a wall.

okay it wasn't a wall. it was oscar, who also stumbled and tripped over the leg of a nearby chair causing an array of limbs to hit faces and a shit tonne of paper work strewn across the room.

of course it ended with you on the floor next to oscar groaning and wincing as you sit up.

"i am so sorry," you say turning to the driver still on the floor.

"don't worry about it, it was only an accident," he reassures and accepts zak's outstretched hand getting up. that only brings your attention to the hand in front of your face-

lando's.

you look up at him for a moment noticing the concerned look on his face that is quickly wiped with humour. "you alright?"

quickly bracing yourself for his touch, you take his hand and get off the floor, offering him a quick "thank you," before turning around and collecting the paper everywhere.

you try not to think of the tingle in your hand and how that was the first time in two years you had talked or touched, instead worrying about how much paper you need to pick up.

the paper thats what you think of.

not the hurtful - but true - words lando said that night.

not the awful - and wrong - things you said.

not how you hurt him.

the paper.

not how you wished you could take it back.

the paper.

"y/n."

"shut up lando."

the paper.

"don't go please, we can work this out."

"how? how can we?"

the paper

'i'll wait, i'll wait, i'll-"

"i won't. you can go back to your fuckboy life without me."

the paper.

"please, y/n."

"no."

the paper.

"you're just scared. you're acting like a pathetic child because you're scared."

"i'm brave enough to walk away right now."

"you dont have to though, you're taking the easy way out. you're acting like a child. grow up."

the paper.

tears burn in your eyes, threatening to overflow and yet you keep a stoic face clearing your throat and pasting a bright smile on your face, turning around and cracking a joke about how you can never seem to stay on your feet.

you don't talk to lando again in the meeting, eyes skimming over him and focusing mostly on oscar and zak and the discussions going around the boardroom.

you feel his eyes on you though. you feel his stare and you hate it. you hate it because you want it on you more.

after the meeting you leave the room like your ass is on fire getting out of the building and heading home before any one decides to look at your face and see that you're about to cry.

"wait, y/n."

you stop still on the edge of the road refusing to turn around and acknowledge the voice. you've already stopped so thats pointless, he knows you've heard him.

"wait," you can hear him approach, his footsteps thudding on the ground. "hey.," he says slightly out of breath, "are you okay?"

sighing you turn around to face him. "i'm fine," you smile, the tears threaten to start falling again. "really, i fall down all the time, you remember-" you cut off and look up sighing again.

"i wasn't asking about that," lando says his eyes trying to search for yours. "you looked like you're about to cry in there. i was asking if you were okay."

and you're stupid heart is done.

"i'm fine lando."

"are you sure?"

"i'm fine."

the same fine you were when less than a week after you walked out, lando was pictured with a girl hanging off his arm. the same fine you were when he was rumoured to be dating a supermodel a week after that.

the same fine you've been for the last two years.

the supermodel rumours were false, they were disproved when she came out and hard launched her boyfriend. lando on the other hand has been in his - as the fans call it - "bachelor era" since then, girls after girls, the rumours never ended.

"you're not fine, y/n."

"i've been fine for the last two years without you lando, i dont need your help now."

with that you turn and walk away, walk away just like you did two years ago, getting in your car and sitting in the silence, basking in your own personal torment. its your own pain, your own hurt and its your own fault. you can't blame anyone other than yourself.

so you're stuck.

you're heart breaks every time you walk away from lando but your head clears, the inner turmoil eases for a moment.

your head and your heart.

you're over it.

you're over it.

you're over him.

right?

[siri-ike]

It was almost a relief, you know? Knowing that they were never really his friends. At least if he's alone, no one can leave him. Or betray him. This was for the best, really. Now, he can't fool himself into trusting again. Danny floated above Gotham observatory overlooking the city. Curled up as tight as he could be. Intangible and invisible, like he didn't even exist. If only.

He looked up at the smog. This city couldn't even give him that much. All it did was take. All anyone did was take, take, take until there was nothing left of him.

It was time he stood up for himself. It was time for him to hit back.

Danny uncurled at the decision. And during this dark Gotham night, a light appeared beneath the smog.

Why should he be the one to hide? Why should he be the one to veer out of harms way?

High above Gotham observatory floated a green glowing boy. As bright as any star. And like the brightest stars, he would burn fast.

Slowly, it descended. The temperature dropped along with him. Soon, he was hovering shortly above the roof of the observatory, and all of Gotham reached zero degrees Celsius.

From his perch, he watched as summer turned to winter.

If all they want is a dangerous monster. He may as well give it to them.

He hugged his legs to him and let out a long frozen breath. The blue tinted white cloud became bigger and bigger as it moved further towards the city. At its exact border, snow began to fall. It was probably the cleanest snow Gotham had seen in decades. If anything, he'd be doing the world a favor by getting rid of it.

The cold stung his cheeks and nose. The tears trickling down his face froze solid. It stung even more, but he didn't wipe them away. It should hurt. He wants to hurt.

In the distance, he hears a crash and screams as the first snowflakes reach the ground, and giant icicles burst out of the ground where they land.

He peeked up from behind his knees at the cries for help.

He doesn't help.

That's not who he is anymore.

A slight creaking sound behind him cought the Ghost Kings attention.

"It was easier, before," Phantom said slowly closed off. "I could keep the cold in, then." He turned to the sorce of the sound. "When someone was worth the warmth."

From just below the horizon of the metal dome, Nightwing climbed into sight. "You can still stop. We can call it even."

"Even?" He spoke in a whisper, but he wasn't quiet. "I'm not the one who needs to earn forgiveness."

Nightwing cringed at the accusation. Did they really go too far? Staying low, he creped closer. "I'm, I'm sorry. We should have trusted you."

"That's not true." Phantom paused and gestured to the chaos unfolding on the city. "That's clearly not true." He floated into a standing position. "I don't need your trust. I don't want your trust."

A chill went down Nightwings spine when their eyes met.

"I was wrong to give you mine." He let his foot touch the roof, and in an instant, a thick sheet of ice spread out from all around him. He looked up at Nightwing, frozen through, with a look of shock on his face.

Phantom slipped through the metal sheeting and into the observatory. He couldn't even turn tangable in there. The whole thing was covered and filled with ice. At least then, no one can disturb him.

Phantom spent hours wallowing at the star maps and research that would now be lost. He mourned the astronomer who was on shift that night. Alone. Just like him. He looked through the framed photos around her station. Unlike him, she had a family to come home to.

He had fully taken stock of his dome when the whole thing started shaking around him. He, of course, stayed was still.

Outside the Batmobile, treked through the ice and slush. This version looked more like a tank than the usual sleek design.

Through a pair of heat sensing binoculars, Red Robin spotted a figure inside the frozen observatory. It was so much colder than the ice around.

What stepped out wasn't Danny, the joke cracking ghost boy who could talk about space for literal hours on end. The gentle soul desperate for a community was gone. In his place was something else. His skin was almost as white as his hair, except his lips, nose, fingers, and toes had all turned dark gray from what had to be 3rd degree frostbite. Two streams of tears stuck frozen to his cheeks. He had dark circles around his eyes, which were only half open.

Paranoia eats the Phantom

DP x DC Prompt

I've always read stories where Danny and the Bats end up together in many ways, but one story caught my eye, 'A Heart Worth Breaking', one chapter in that work on a03 has Danny snapping at the Bats for looking into him when he hasn't done the same, and it inspired me to make a prompt similar to that chapter

Danny escaped the horrors of both the GIW and his parents. They cut him open, seen what makes him tick. They run tests on the 'samples' they collect from him. They put him in a room and see what is best to work on him to hurt him. They put him in different Ghost Containment devices that are modified to inflict harm on him. They... they killed those he 'manipulated' (Jazz, Sam and Tucker) in front of him... just to see if he would reveal his 'true colors'.

He escaped to Gotham when the Justice League began a raid on the GIW base he was being held in. None of the heroes had shown interest in the calls coming from Amity, so why now? He wouldn't find that answer, as he just wants to live. He wants to be a person and not a 'thing' to be studied or a hero. Gotham has enough ambient ectoplasm for him to live in, so he had Technus Forge him some identification papers on the digital plane to be "Daniel Jasper Folson".

He did his best to avoid the radar of the Bats and Birds, but he couldn't ignore his obsession. He went out at night as Phantom to try and discreetly help those in need. He failed at being discreet and was discovered by the Bats and Birds.

He wasn't expecting to be requested to help them during some big hits on Trafficking Rings or gathering Intel on the big name rogues that are obviously hiding something behind the scenes. Sure, he only has Nightwing, Red Hood, and occasionally Signal to hang out with, but he's slowly coming to trust the Bats and Birds of Gotham.

He should've known that it was too good to be true. During a quiet night, where he was hanging out with Wing and Hood on a roof, eating Batburgers together, he overheard Oracle and Red Robin tell one of the two with Danny about their progress on finding more information on him or trying to get through the GIW logs kn him.

This causes him to snap on Wing and Hood, saying that they didn't care for him as another being, treating him as a thing to be studied and contained. He stops himself from revealing too much and runs away. He runs away to be with the lesbian couple that both remind him of his sister and best friend in some ways and who have helped him on occasion when he ran into them on the streets, trying to build up enough money to get a home for himself.

He is at their front door, waiting for one of them to open it after he knocked on it, tears still streaming down his face and looking heartbroken. They do let him in and do their best to comfort him. He is just staring blankly at nothing in front of him as the couple trues to get him to talk to them. He vaguely hears Harley tell Pamela something about flowers, someone called B-man, and about himself.

Before he registers Pamela coming into the room with the flowers, he sees one of the Bats or Birds land by the window. It's only after the Bat or Bird almost knocks on the window to be let in when he registered the flowers that Pamela has offered to Danny. Blood Blossoms. His body hurts, and with the bouquet of Blood Blossoms so close to him, his body begins to melt in a grotesque way into a puddle of Ectoplasm, and then thay puddle evaporated into nothing.

But that wasn't Danny. That was a duplicate he sent to Pamela and Harley. He couldn't fully trust them, as they were known to be, on occasion, working with the Bats and Birds, but he wanted to be with people he knew he could trust. And now he thinks that trust is broken, as he connected the dots, seeing one of the Vigilantes go to them, figuring out that B-Man is Batman, and the Blood Blossoms that Pamela had.

Maybe it's time for him to use his Ghost King title to the fullest. He can't trust the heroes of the world because of that trust had been betrayed by the Bats and Birds of Gotham, and he's going to make an announcement to the world.

[bucktommyyendgame]

Back to the Drawing Board

Wasn't that something? Are Buck and Tommy endgame-shaped, or what? I obviously couldn't let that ending go soo...here is a little post ep ficlet.

SPOILERS FOR 8X11: Holy Mother of God

bucktommy - words: 800-ish - rating: gen - complete

It does feel good to get things unpacked, that's for sure. His talk with Maddie helped but he knows she was wrong about plenty of things.

And definitely about the need to be alone. He doesn't want to be alone. He knows exactly what--who--he wants.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, opens up a very familiar text chain.

Hey. Can we talk?

He watches and watches and watches.

And the bubbling starts.

He swears his heart is in his throat and he holds his breath. It feels like it takes forever but Tommy’s answer comes through.

I would like that. Free today?

Buck takes one long exhale in relief. Coffee shop in an hour?

I’ll be there.

Buck makes it in 45 minutes. He orders both their coffees, Tommy’s Iced Flat White with Almond Milk in one hand and finds a table. The feeling of deja vu is so eerie that he looks around to make sure he didn’t also accidentally pick the same table.

He texts Tommy to tell him where he is and waits.

It only takes Tommy about two more minutes before he’s walking up, an uncertain smile on his face. He still looks as sad as he did when he left the kitchen and Buck really really hates that he put that look there.

“Hey,” Tommy says as he sits down. Buck pushes the coffee toward him and he talks a sip, humming in approval.

“Hey,” Buck answers.

They sit in semi-uncomfortable silence for a moment or two before, at the exact same time, they both say, “I’m sorry.”

They each laugh a little before Tommy sobers. “Please let me start.

“Okay,” Buck says, feeling off-kilter.

Tommy bites the inside of his cheek, then says, “I never should have brought up Eddie. It was stupid. I never seriously thought I was in competition with him.”

Buck eyes him. “I’m not sure that’s true.”

Tommy sighs. “I-”

“No,” Buck insists. “Look, Eddie is my best friend. We’ve been through some really difficult things together. But I want you to know that there are no, absolutely none, romantic feelings there. When you said you wanted to try again...God, I thought I was getting exactly what I wanted.”

Tommy looks down, fidgeting with his cup. “Until I stuck my foot in it.”

“It was something that was clearly bothering you,” Buck points out. “Is...is that what you thought the entire time we were together?”

“No,” Tommy says. “No, I just...Look, Evan, I’ve never...I’ve never been the first. For anyone. You have this huge support network around you and I don’t.”

Tommy holds up a hand when Buck opens his mouth to say something.

“And I don’t say that to, garner sympathy, or something, I say it because when push comes to shove, I don’t have the family that you’ve found for yourself. I guess, maybe, I was unsure of my place in that,” Tommy explains. “I have friends, acquaintances, I’m not alone. I guess I just didn’t know how to fit into your life.”

“Okay,” Buck says slowly. “But what if I said that I wanted to do that? I want to work on us, I want you to fit into my life. I’m sorry Eddie cut off contact, I didn’t know that.”

Tommy shrugs, but Buck continues. “Maybe we just didn’t communicate enough in those first six months. I see that now. But, I want to figure this out. I want to be with you.”

Tommy purses his lips, takes a deep breath. “Yeah?”

Buck holds a hand across the table, palm up. Tommy barely hesitates, sliding his fingers through Buck’s lacing them together.

“Yeah,” Buck confirms. “That night...was everything I’ve been wanting for months, Tommy.”

This time, Tommy’s smile is sweet and soft. “Me too.”

“We slept on the box spring,” Buck says with a laugh, gratified when Tommy laughs too.

“I was a little desperate for you,” Tommy admits.

“I think you could tell I was the same with you,” Buck says wryly. Tommy laughs again.

“So,” Buck says with a deep breath. “What do you say? Can we try again?”

“I would really really love that,” Tommy says, squeezing his hand. “Starting now?”

Buck brings his hand to his mouth and kisses the back of it. “Starting now.”

tag list part 1

@desert--moonchild, @blitzynatural, @multishippinghussy, @mmso-notlikethat, @esendoran

@sunnywithachanceofbi, @sleepywinchesters, @buck-up-buckley, @manifestingchaoticvibes, @corvid-cryptidd

@lbltpsmspenguin, @theotherbuckley, @cliophilyra, @actuallyitsellie, @thecarrott

@louvemeanyway, @misstommykinard, @the-omniscient-narrator, @comfortpilot, @a-mel0n

@hyperfocusthusly, @mayorjack, @weewookinard, @swagmaster9k, @dudedudeduda

@byunbuckjunmy, @adamkaradecc, @retromodgirl, @gaybonesforivy, @cull3nblaze

[ipushhimback]

would you be able to write oscah fluff after china win?

there you go, anon!! it is not too long but i hope you like it <3

shut up and give me a hug

pairing: oscar piastri x reader warnings: none words: ca. 800

The whole last week Oscar had been in a bad mood thanks to everything that had happened at his home race in Australia. Not even the fact that he had secured his first pole position in qualifying made him feel better. 

Now you were standing next to Oscar, who was getting ready for the race in China. 

“Listen, baby. You will go out there and you’ll fucking win this race, ok? Don’t think about anything than winning. You can do it. I know that you’ll win, the fans believe in your win.”, you said as you moved to stand in front of your boyfriend to look him in the eyes. “Did you understand? You’ll win.”

Oscar looked down at you and nodded. “Of course. I’ll try my best.” He leaned down to you and pressed a kiss to your lips before grinning down at you. “But I want a reward”, he said smirking. 

“Yeah yeah, sure. Now go”, you said and placed his helmet on his head. He gave you a thumbs up before getting in the car. 

***

He won. Oscar really won the Grand Prix. To be honest you were a little scared after his start but then he crossed the line first, making you tick another cube on your bingo card. Yes, you did have a bingo card because you need something to keep you interested in the races when they become boring.

Your boyfriend got out of the car and he looked… like always. Oscar has never been one to show his emotions after a win. That didn’t mean he wasn't happy to be first. Just that he liked it better to celebrate with you.

After the interviews and the podium, where you cried but… no one has seen that, he went over to you still smelling like champagne and sweat. 

“I hate to break it to you, babe, but you really need a shower”, you greeted him. 

“Shut up and give me a hug”, Oscar mumbled as he stepped forward to wrap his arms around you. 

“Yes, you big baby”, you said hugging him back and patting his back over the race suit which was drenched in champagne. 

You scrunched you nose. “Osc. I really really love you but can you please take a shower and change? You are smelly. And wet. And I know the champagne is amazing bc you know you won but it is also just gross…”

”Okayyy…”, Oscar sighed. “But remember my reward, yeah?”

You nodded and gave him another pat to his back to get him to leave for a shower. He left you standing there wondering what you could reward him with. You knew he would be happy with a night full of sex but you wanted to give him something else. Something more meaningful. You just had no idea what. Until it hit you. Something simple. But you were excited to see his face when you would give it to him. 

You sprinted to a small stand where the fans could buy merch and other stuff. You bought what you were looking for before running back to wait for Oscar in front of his driver’s room. 

Only a couple minutes later the door opened and Oscar, now in jeans and a McLaren hoodie, was standing in front of you.

”So? You got my reward?”, he asked, smirking as he leaned down to kiss you.

”Yes. I do. Close your eyes.”, you demanded. 

Oscar looked confused for a second before doing as you told him. You grabbed his hand and slipped something on his wrist. Oscar furrowed his brows trying to make out what it was.

”Ok, you can open your eyes again”, you said nervously. What if he thought it was stupid? What if he didn’t like it? But before you could overthink it Oscar opened his eyes and looked down at his wrist. 

An orange hair tie with a small charm of the chinese gp on it. 

“I’m sorry it is only something small and probably a little silly but you know when people are a couple and the girl gives her boyfriend a hair tie? We haven’t done that yet and I thought it might be cute like from now on you can just add the charms of races you won or so but if you don’t like it it is ok as well or-“

Oscar interrupted you by pressing a kiss on your lips.

”Shut up. It’s amazing, babe. Thank you”, he told you as you blushed. “Now to the reward I actually meant before…”

a/n: loved writing this and i hope you like it! pls continue sending requests i already got a few and am so happy about all of them <3 tags: @strawberryy-kiwii / @a-distantdreamer / @requiemforthepoets / @martygraciesversion381 / @l-vroom4 / @comicqlivy / @sid-is-gr8 / @picklesbuddy93 / @sadiemack9 / @f1fantasys / @cloud-55 / @sunny44 / @widow-cevans / @gigicisneros / @mbioooo0000 / @sinfully-yoursss / @bravo-delta-eccho / @rue-t / @mayax2o07 / @alexanderachillesisgay / @maviesamour / @suhchenjun / @pippyth3hippy / @sweate-r-weathe-r / @joannaln4 / @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy / @aleatorio1234 / @anayaverse 

[buckevantommy]

8x11 Bucktommy fixit coda of sorts: Tommy and Eddie talk. hopeful ending?

It's been almost a week since he walked out of Evan's life, again, when Tommy gets a call from an unfamiliar number. With an El Paso area code.

"Diaz. How's Texas?"

"Texas? Texas is great, Tommy, thanks for asking."

Thanks for telling me, Tommy thinks but doesn't say, because he doesn't want to be snarky and irritated this early into his shift. He takes a breath to try and calm himself and let the negative thoughts release on the slow exhale as Eddie lists off the positive impact his move has made on both Christopher's life and his own.

Everything aside, Tommy's happy for him. For both of them.

"But from what I heard, things in L.A. are kinda fucked."

Then again: Eddie can be a bigger bitch than Tommy when he wants to be so he might as well meet him on the field, knives drawn. "Did Buck tell you that?" It comes out sharp and he lets it hang, wants it to slice.

"Oh, yeah. I had a very interesting and totally insane converstaion with Buck where he said the reason you dumped him was because you thought he'd dump you for me if you didn't."

It's not the whole truth, but it cuts all the same. Good thing Tommy has armor forged in the slow burning coals of a lifetime of being a disappointment. He can take a jab from an old friend he didn't even know that long. In the six months he dated Evan. his time with Eddie dwindled to nothing. They were fast friends who fizzled out, not unlike his relationship with.. Buck. "I wouldn't say it's insane."

He was never going to mention it, is the thing. It wasn't really until they broke up that Tommy began to wonder if the reason Ev- Buck hadn't reached out was because he'd moved on. Eddie certainly didn't look back, ceasing all communication in the fallout. And it hurt, to lose not just Evan - and he was Evan to him then - but someone he thought was becoming a good friend. As much of a friend as Tommy would let into his life, anyway.

"Oh, it's batshit insane, Kinard. Almost as batshit insane as stealing a chopper and flying it headfirst into a hurricane."

That's a blow that lands with a dull ache, a bruise that'll linger. It was the night they met - him and Eddie, him and Evan - and whatever else came after, Tommy holds fast to that memory as one of the highlights of his treacherous and lonely life, despite - or maybe inclusive of - the life-threatening feats of.. insanity.

He's quiet for too long. Doesn't answer because any words that come to mind are scathing in a way he doesn't want to marr that fond memory with.

Eddie sighs heavy through the speaker, the fight seeming to drain out of his voice. "It's not like that, man, you gotta know."

Tommy straightens his posture where he's walked out of the hangar, staring at the chainlink fence separating the tarmac to the weeds and the grass and the distant treeline.

"Me and Buck are close- we're family- but it's not like that. Not like it is between you two."

Was, Tommy doesn't say. He doesn't dare hope but he can't bring himself to say it out loud, nail in the coffin.

"And I resent the fact you think I don't know myself like that, Tommy. I may be figuring some stuff out but I figured that shit out back in high school and every day since. Just 'cause you kissed Buck and it turned his world view on its head doesn't mean every straight guy you meet is just one good smooch away from wanting to put their mouth on your dick."

"Jesus, Eddie." No nonsense. It's one of the things he always liked about the guy. That, and the way he could deliver off-color comments with a straight face, only breaking if and when Tommy couldn't help but crack a smile.

"Look. I'm sorry about not reaching out after everything. I had Buck's back, y'know? Bros before manhoes."

"You calling me a hoe, Diaz?" His face morphs into a smile as they fall back into this old - barely new before it was over - back and forth.

"No. Just an idiot for managing to mess things up twice now."

"Eddie-"

"Don't worry, I know it was Buck's fault, too, okay? I already chewed him out and kicked his ass into gear- he call you yet? He mentioned talking to Maddie, said he wanted to call you."

No call, just a text that read: can we talk? please?? that Tommy hasn't replied to. Doesn't want to invite himself to a third round of heartbreak. "I'm on shift, so. If that's all? I gotta get back."

"No, that is not all- get your head out of your ass, Tommy. Talk to him. And let him spiral a bit until he finds the right words - he'll get there, eventually. It just takes him some time. 'Cause he's not over you and I don't think he ever will be."

He doesn't know me, Tommy thinks. And that's the real crux of the issue, isn't it? It's not about Eddie. And it's not about Evan not knowing what he wants because of his relatively newly discovered queerness.

It's about Tommy knowing he's not good enough to keep Evan in the long run.

Evan might think he won't get over Tommy, but he will. There'll be someone else, someone better, there always is. Maybe not Eddie, but some man or woman will get to keep him for a while longer, maybe a lifetime if they're lucky.

And Tommy.. he'll do what he's always done: find ways to survive, alone.

But.. if this is his last chance to talk to Eddie, and by extension Evan.. "Look, thankyou for clearing the air, but. I can't, okay? He is- was, the one I wanted forever with. I told him this. But I'm not that for him. I can't be." Not because he doesn't want to be - god, does he want to be - but because he's not enough. He's never been enough for anyone to want to keep.

Eddie sighs in his ear. "Y'know, if I wasn't 800 miles away right now I don't know if I'd hug you or try to knock some sense into you."

A hint of a smile tracks across Tommy's lips, fading fast. He misses their sparring sessions but doesn't want to let himself be sad over losing another would-be friend - he's got enough to be sad about and no time or want to wallow in any of it.

"Well." Thing is: even if this thing with Evan is dead and buried, if Eddie is open to it.. "If you're ever in town, my garage is always open. And," he steels himself, takes another breath and shakes it out, "I'm sorry. Sorry for thinking.. you know." The idea doesn't dig into his heart anymore, no marks left behind, just the shadow of a phantom chased away out the corner of his eye.

"Don't sweat it man. Seriously. but, hey- the not feeling good enough, thing? You're not alone in that, man. And the thing about Buck? He loves people for who they are, faults and demons and all."

Tommy knows. He knows how big Buck's.. Evan's, heart is, which is why he knows he deserves better.

"And if you ever wanna talk, consider this line of communication open."

Tommy's smile comes back stronger, lingers. There's a wet sheen threatening to blur his vision. His throat catches as he swallows. His voice comes out a little raspy when he says, "Thanks, man. Same to you."

Eddie makes a sound of agreement, then: "Call Buck."

Someone calls Tommy from the hangar. "I gotta go. Take care, Eddie." He hangs up before Eddie can add anything else to torture him with.

Making his way over to the main hangar, he thumbs over to his text chain with Evan. He types out four little letters, then backspaces and types a different four: okay when? then exits out of the screen and locks and pockets his phone.

It's a bad idea, no matter what Eddie says or what Tommy's realised in the last few minutes. It's still a bad idea. Tommy has to protect his heart.

..Doesn't he? Doesn't he deserve at least that?

The klaxon sounding cuts off further tormentive thoughts as he shifts into work mode and focuses his concentration and efforts on doing his job. Even if he can't salvage his love life he can save a life or two elsewhere.

[anonymousyeahtotally]

Welcome to your occasional program of “Husband Headcanons” with anonauthor.

P.S: anon has never written in their life, be prepared for shitty writing and headcanons that are more likely than not, ooc. This is going to be a short read. Thank you.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Post contains:

Mydei x (most likely fem) Reader

Nsfw who knows 🫣

Probably ooc content

Cringe, it's inevitable who gives a fuck

Fluff 🩷

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

He'd act all nonchalant about the idea of cuddling, but he's the first to fall asleep with his head in your lap. Switch positions, and he'll be pulling you closer every two minutes, making sure you're comfortable with your face all up in his tits. He doesn't mind, really, but it does bother him when you comment on his heart rate that seems to be skyrocketing.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

Whenever you get upset at him, he's sure to give you space. It takes him some courage, but he apologizes for his mistakes, telling you he'll be a better husband from there on.

If you're still mad, he'll kiss you.

If you're still mad, he'll cook.

If you're still mad, he'll offer you a bath.

If you're still mad, he'll fuck you in there, whispering apologies and honey-sweet promises, almost like a puppy begging for forgiveness. Come onnnnnn, don't be mad anymore.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

Goes crazy absolutely insane when you feel up his body, especially when your sneaky fingers trace over his crimson markings — he's trying not to show it, you can tell.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

Early riser — not anymore, thanks to you. All he wants to do is drown in the comfort of these cozy, snuggly sheets, with you in his arms. Even when you insist on getting up, all you can hear is an out-of-character whine, and a few grumbles. He pulls you closer, closer, and closer.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

He can't help but stiffen under your watchful eyes, feeling how your gaze was practically burned into every single one of his movements. He's just playing house with the kids, as usual... What, getting ideas? He can practically read your mind from across the room — you're thinking how good of a father he'd be if you had children with him. Just a thought, nothing much.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

"Sit."

"What?"

"Sit."

He pats his lap. It's not a request, it's pretty much an order. When he says he wants you there, he actually means he needs you there. Surely there's no harm to it?

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

He's not saying it wasn't his idea to get a cat. But he isn't denying how he doesn't like how affectionate you are to it. Kisses on its nose, scratches under the chin, ruffling its fur, brushing it... Damn it, can't you brush his hair too?? He's this close to putting it back up for adoption.

♡

Husband!Mydei... Hm

You have the honours of braiding his hair each morning, thank you.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Thank you for reading my 2am ideas. I'm sorry it's shitty

- anonauthor

[bbina]

wonbin takes a long drag off his cigarette, letting the substance fill his lungs for another temporary escape from reality. he exhales the smoke and lets it curl around him before he fans the smoke away from his face

he takes another drag, his hands already raised to his mouth before he hears a familiar voice behind him. the voice he knows all too well to forget

"you know, a guy like you shouldn't be smoking"

wonbin's eyes widened and turns around at the speed of light to see you in the flesh

it was you

wonbin takes a good look at you. this was the first time he has seen you up close in months. the last time he saw you was when he dropped you off at the train station before midterm break started and that was the very last time he saw you since

sure you two lived across each other but wonbin had deliberately avoided you at all cost and you did the same. you can't even recall the last time you opened your window blinds since you came back from midterm break

"it's nice to see you! how have you been?" you smile, taking a seat next to him on the curb he was sitting on

wonbin couldn't believe his eyes and ears. it really was you and you just sat next to him like nothing happened between the two of you

".. i've been good. you?" wonbin answers quietly, diverting his attention back to the cigarette in his hands. if he stares at you longer, he wouldn't know how to act

"i'm doing really well actually. i feel like i finally found my spark again" you share, smiling at him slightly before looking up at the night sky

there was that weird sense of deja vu. this was exactly how you two met each other a few months ago and it almost feels surreal that it happened again but this time you two were in two completely different situations

you take note of the box of cigarettes next to him. the same brand you used to use when you did smoke. you can't help but think that he'd resort back to smoking because you two did make a pact before that you two would stop smoking if the latter stops

"you're smoking again" you comment

wonbin notices you staring at his cigarette. he quickly puts it out and shoves his hands into the pockets of his jacket

"sorry. old habit" he murmurs, unsure how to keep the conversation going when all he wanted to say was that he's sorry

you purse your mouth shut as you let the silence do the talking. the same silence that used to comfort you with each other. although you don't harbor any resentment towards wonbin anymore, you just can't help the awkwardness growing in the atmosphere

like there were so many words left unspoken that's waiting to be let out

what seems like a couple of minutes of silence, wonbin decides to break it

"hey" wonbin calls out softly, slowly raising his head to look at you

"hm?"

"i'm sorry" wonbin blurts out, "for everything"

there it was. the words you've been dreading to hear from him. you had already moved on from the situation a long time ago. you had accepted the fact that he wasn't ready yet and that you couldn't wait for someone who was still uncertain with themselves so you let it go

obviously it hurt the first time. it was hard during the first few weeks after midterm break. you were in a routine with wonbin during those months and adapting to a new normal wasn't that easy

but you had better company than you realize. you hung out more with your own friends and sion, who you'd say made your life so much brighter when he came into the picture

sion was so full of life. it honestly weirded you out the first time when he was so considerate of you and your feelings. he knew that you were going through something during midterm break and he didn't try anything but to comfort you as a friend

wonbin picks up on your silence and he drops his head low. he bites his lip as he comes up with more words to say. this is the perfect moment to tell you everything even if it won't change the past. he just needed you to hear him out

"i'm really sorry that i wasn't ready back then. it's just hard for me to accept the fact that you liked me and i was scared that–"

you hold your hand out in front of him, causing him to pause his apology. wonbin clamps his mouth shut, waiting for you to say something in case you wanted to address something but instead, you shake your head

"it's okay, bin" you chuckle, "that was in the past. if anything, i was in the wrong too for expecting"

expecting. ouch, that's gotta hurt. did he really make you feel that way without realizing?

wonbin opens his mouth to say something but you beat him to it

"we were naive back then now that i think about it" you start, recalling your shared memories with the man beside you. the same man who had your heart in his hands, "like the odds of two people who were relatively fresh out of a breakup meeting at a place like this. bonding over recent heartbreaks and all that stuff is quite rare and quite comforting in a way" you rambled

wonbin listens intently at your words, processing everything while reminiscing your time together

"if anything we found comfort in each other at the time" you turn to look at him in the eye, "the late night talks, the comfortable silence when we're together.. i wouldn't trade that experience for anything in the world"

"we were alone together, you know?" you smile, looking away from him, "even if we didn't work out in the end, i still felt a genuine connection with you"

wonbin just sits there in silence. the reality of you healed and moved on from whatever you two had was beyond him. there was nothing he can do about it anymore but dwell on the what ifs and what could've been with you

your conversation is cut short when your phone rings. you jolt in surprise before answering your phone

it was sion

"hello? is our ramen done? i'm outside!" wonbin watches you talk to your boyfriend on the phone. he can't help but feel his chest twist in pain that he could've be the one in sion's place if it weren't for his own selfishness

he thought that if he protected his heart, he wouldn't be hurt again but what happened was that he not only hurt himself but the girl who genuinely liked him

now all he can do is watch you from a distance. watch you be treated the way he was supposed to treat you

his train of thought gets cut off when you wave your hands in front of his face

"i gotta go wonbin. sion's inside the convenience store waiting for me. i'll see you around, okay?" you stood up from the curb, wiping your pants with your hands, "bye wonbin, it was nice seeing you again" you smile before walking inside the convenience store

wonbin watches you til the doors closed. he stares at the way sion kisses your cheek when you walked in the store

he forces himself to look away before the pain in his chest worsens. this hurt even more than the time his ex girlfriend ghosted him twice that he had developed a fear of commitment

yeah. this was way worse. to see your dream in a different reality

now all he can do is force himself to walk away from the convenience store. ironically enough the same place you two had met. the same place where everything started, he was now walking away from

maybe in alternate universe, you two had worked it out. maybe he wouldn't be scared of vulnerability. maybe, just maybe, in some alternate universe, you two would still be alone together.

alone together ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 . . . alone together

── taking comfort in the thought that you are together in aloneness through late night talks, heartfelt confessions, and a genuine connection. with your shared experience of recent heartbreaks, you wonder if getting together would be all worth it. in which you find solace in each other's company, that you are alone together.

⋆｡˚ prev | main masterlist | alone together masterlist ˚｡

꩜ notes .ᐟ holy fucking shit.. its over...... i did it... i finally finished this shit show of a fanfic... SEVENTY FUCKING CHAPTERS, over 43k words overall.. I HAVE CROSSED THE FINISH LINE 😭 imma need a pat on the back for this cus holy SHIIIIIIIITTTTTTT im so proud of myself for finishing this cus it was a rollercoaster of emotions. if u made it this far then thank you sosososoososososoososo much for reading and enjoying my works 😭 it really means a lot to me that you guys genuinely enjoy my shit lawl. i wanted the ending to be real af as this fic is basically true to life except for the ending. i wanted to show a story where not all love stories end in happy endings, some end like this hence the ending i chose. to me, this is the happy ending and the sad ending is that yn ends up in the same cycle but thats another story for another day! again, thank you sosososo much for reading! until my next riize smau :] bbina OUT!

p.s if u guys are gonna reblog the masterlist, pls dont spoil what kind of ending it is 🙏 so people can react the same as you guys HSADHJASHJDASHJ

꩜ taglist .ᐟ @onlywonb @rosesfortaro @starwonb1n @wonychu @totheseok @dolloie @hyunjinsnumberonefun @binluvsu @onlyhyunjin @annswwa @pwbjsc @hakkkuu @ilovejungwonandhaechan @artstaeh @lecheugo @odxrilove @bunni @saranghoeforanton @nujeskz @quicksilverstone @kyusqult @nctsshoes2 @s9nwoo @daegale @palchokitty @dutifullyannoyingraspberry @oshakyao @koryutte @b-riize @wbyeolz @peterm4rker @winuvs @i03jae @rsatoru @enhacolor @dalliesque @sweetiejaeyun @dearestjake @cupidslovearrows @kkumistars @sngj08 @taroddori @ennycutie @sa3ha @koeuh @astro-doll-the-star @amouriu @mujeans @ijustreallylike2read @endtostartbreathin

[mommyslittlebird]

Long Distance Mommy!Wanda: Punishment

Of course, I could finish my chapter for this week, but I could write 2k words of puppy!reader yesterday and 1k words of this today 😵‍💫😵‍💫

"You've been a very naughty girl today, haven't you?" Wanda clicks her tongue over the phone.

You swallowed. You wanted to argue. The only reason you had gotten distracted in class was because she was sending you naughty things all day. But you held your tongue. You knew better than to argue. "Yes, mommy."

"Mmm," she hummed, pleased you thought better of trying to pin this on her. "And you know mommy has to punish naughty girls, don't you?"

You nodded. "Yes, mommy."

"That's a good girl. Now, I need you to go to the toy drawer and pick out exactly what I tell you to, okay? You'll need a plug- the blue one tonight-, the paddle, and your clamps."

Your eyes went wide. It wasn't uncommon that Wanda would make you put in the plug or wear the nipple clamps, but she very rarely made you use both at the same time. You whined. "Mommy..."

"Aww, what is it baby?" She cooed with faux sympathy.

"It's gonna hurt..." you whimpered quietly.

She nearly laughed. "Of course it's going to hurt, baby. It is a punishment, after all. But you're gonna be a good girl for mommy, aren't you?"

"Yes, mommy," you grumbled reluctantly, grabbing the toys and bringing them to the bed. Since dating Wanda, you'd acquired a good number of new toys, including a nice adjustable stand for your phone that allowed you to film yourself on your bed. You set up your phone, putting Wanda on speaker and hitting the video call button.

Wanda smiled as you appeared on her screen, already naked and preparing yourself for her. "Hey, pretty girl."

You blushed, carefully avoiding the camera as you applied lube to the plug and slowly pushed it into your ass.

She clicked disapprovingly. "Uh uh, sweet girl. You know better than that. Turn over and spread your cheeks. Mommy wants to see your pretty plug."

You did as she asked, glad that at least she couldn't see how red your face was getting from this angle, even though you were sure she already knew.

She hummed. "Mmm, good girl. You're lucky I don't make you take it out and put it back in, since you decided to hide it from me the first time."

You whimpered at the thought. "Thank you, mommy. I'm sorry."

When she finally had her fill, she spoke again. "Okay, sweetheart. You can turn back over now. Show mommy how you put on your clamps."

You turned back over, showing her the clamps first so she could make sure they were adjusted to their most intense setting. You pinched your nipple, crying out as the cruel metal sank into the sensitive bud. You did the same thing on the other side, nearly crying with how sensitive you were.

The plug stung slightly, stretching you just past what was comfortable. But the clamps hurt even worse, burning and stinging your sensitive chest. You were already squirming in front of Wanda. "Mommy, can I touch myself, please? Please mommy. It hurts so bad." The lack of pleasurable stimulation made the pain almost unbearable.

Wanda, who could see how quickly you were already approaching a breaking point, caved. "Yes, baby. Play with yourself for me. Tell mommy how it feels."

The pressure to your clit immediately brought you relief, allowing the stinging pain to take on a slightly pleasurable edge. It was truly amazing how much of a difference it made. You moaned. "Much better, mommy. It still h-hurts. But... not s-so bad."

"Mmm, that's a good girl. Keep touching yourself for me, baby. Get yourself nice and sensitive."

You did as she asked, bucking against your own hand in a desperate attempt to get yourself off. With the stimulation on nearly every sensitive part of your body, you could feel your orgasm steadily approaching. You hoped Wanda would have mercy on you, deciding that the combination of the clamps and plug was enough of a punishment for tonight. "Can I cum, mommy?"

Wanda was slightly taken aback by your question. Sure, she'd been teasing you all day, but you were hardly ever this fast. "So close already, baby?"

You nodded, biting down on your bottom lip.

"Stop." She commanded.

You whined but did as she instructed.

"Pick up the paddle. I want you to hold yourself open for me and spank your little clit twenty times. I'll count out loud. If I don't think it was hard enough, it doesn't count. Understand?"

You whined, picking up the paddle in your right hand, using your left hand to spread your lips apart, putting your swollen clit on display for her. Hesitantly, you brought the paddle down with a soft thud. She didn't start counting. You tried again, harder this time. She didn't say "one" until the third time, when the leather made a loud thwack again your glistening folds.

You continue to bring down the paddle again and again, eyes watering and thighs shaking until they uncontrollably snap closed. "No more, mommy. Please."

"Three more." She commands. She takes a small bit of mercy on you. She'd only counted 15.

Shaking, you spread your thighs again, bringing the paddle down again. Your legs snap closed in between each painful strike, but you manage three more.

Her harsh demeanor final fades away after she counts the third strike. She allows you to throw the paddle down and collapse onto the bed with your thighs pressed tightly together in an attempt to relief the pain. "You did so good for me angel. You can take the clamps off and the plug out whenever you're ready, baby. Mommy's got you, sweetheart."

Even from far away, she was always so tender in her aftercare. She directed you through all the steps, carefully talking you through everything from applying ointment to wrapping yourself up in your favorite blanket. She told you leave the toys on the nightstand wrapped in a blanket. They could wait until morning.

You wrapped yourself around the stuffed bear she'd bought you, inhaling the strawberry scent she'd picked out to put inside. You let her soft words of praise and love wrap around you, pretending she was laying right beside you. You peacefully drifted off to the sound of her gentle voice singing to you.

Even from miles away, she would always let you know you are her precious angel, more loved than anything else in the world.

[noxspost]

the source of the knock was a small person with hands banged up with hard work. Rough and calloused hands marked with Burns and scrapes and cuts long healed marking them as a blacksmith. The clothing was basic and wore. They watch with their beady eyes behind glasses and their bread covered in soot "I found this. They said take this to the guardian."

The librarian blinks taking a back at the short blacksmith who waited expectantly but patiently their eyes darken with age their beard covered in soot and had a smile. The owner of the house nods "yes it is a book." They reach out the hand expectedly waiting for the book to be placed in their outstretched hand but the book was pulled back and the blacksmith's face furrows twists into confusion and a but aggressive "no. I want to know what it says I found it in the basement of my dead wife's childhood home. I can't read. Please I want to know what it says." The other stranger looked a bit terrified that they had been a bit rude after having tried taking the book several more times I'm sorry." They speak in a meak and embarrassed "it's okay."

His voice was polite and honest. Something the other person hadn't in years. got many mocked them for their foolish mission but here in front of them on their doorstep to their house was a blacksmith an older man who has never read but is willing to learn. Something they had never heard and seen before.

He waits and relaxed when he notices there was no more attempt to take the book "well I can't tell you if I can't read the cover."

"Oh right sorry." They smile as they hold back their sash so it doesn't side off her outfit which was a Sari. They were going to be at the celebration but this is important way more. "Thank you." He beams with joy as they takes it and studies the book. The blaxksmith sees the age and wisdom of this lady as they study the cover. He knew what books looked like and what the parts were called but never the the contents inside. Everyone used cuneiform to get around. "This is about flora and faun of India and medical uses of the floa." He nods and asked "Well it sounds important...." he looks around and asked "another reason why I ask for your help," he responded "I want to learn to read."

The librarian stops walking back to send off the blacksmith. They looked at him hard and good and realized he wasn't joking he's being completely serious. They look at the food they would bring to the party and sighed "if you come with me and some food I will teach you." She takes the book and sets it down to then pick up the food bowl up. She giggles a bit at how excitable the blacksmith looked his eyes lighting up with his newfound Joy

"I am the last librarian on Earth. The world has forgotten how to read, but I guard the knowledge of humanity in a hidden vault. Today, someone knocked on the door—and they brought a book."

[emeraldserenade]

hii!! i have a request for joaquin :) reader is joaquin’s wife that he told bucky & sam abt but they thought he was lying and she eventually meets them in person & they’re shocked 🩵🩵

Real ~ Joaquín Torres

synopsis: Sam and Bucky never thought you were real, until you were in their eyesight.

tw: fem!reader, FBI!reader, limited use of y/n, barely edited

fic, ficlet, drabble, request

Hi Reese, I hope you like this! If you've seen Criminal Minds, then you know what a profiler is and that's the job I gave her. I also didn't know how to end this so sorry for the odd ending.

➽──────────────❥

It wasn't uncommon for Joaquín to talk about you, your name and the words "my girl", "my wife," or "amor de mi vida" tumbling from his lips like you were the goddess he worshipped. It wouldn't surprise anyone who saw the two of you together if he did worship you, he looked at you like you made the world go round. And you did the same, the love you two had for each other made your own world go round.

Bucky and Sam though? They have never seen you, they've heard about you. Joaquín spending any time he can talking about you, about your smile, the way you hold yourself, anything he could think of was mentioned. That's why the two of them were convinced you were fake, they had never met you, let alone see a picture, yet he was always talking like he was trying to convince them you were real.

"Are you sure the kid isn't lying?" Bucky questioned Sam one day, they were all waiting on you. You said your plane was running behind because your 'case' had run a little longer than expected.

"Why would he set this whole thing up if he is?" Sam tried to defend Joaquín at any chance he could. While he didn't particularly believe you were real, he wanted to give Joaquín the benefit of the doubt.

"Oh, she's here!" Joaquín announced, bouncing on the balls of his feet waiting for you to appear. It only took a moment, then you were in his eyesight. He made a beeline to you, the mostly empty airport helped him not having to weave through people.

To say Sam and Bucky were shocked was an understatement. They assumed, had you been real, that you were going to be pretty. But this was something else, you looked ethereal and they understood by Joaquín basically worshipped you. It didn't help that they saw the way you looked at Joaquín, the amount of love that could never be faked.

"Sam, Bucky, this is y/n, my wife," Joaquín introduced you to the others and you shook their hands.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you two," your eyes twinkled with your smile, your genuine happiness at meeting them making them both feel at ease around you.

"Likewise," Sam was the first to recover, his shock still evident on his face.

"You two thought I was fake," you announced and watched them both scramble for an excuse. "It's ok, my job doesn't really allow me to be around as often as I'd like," you admitted, pressing into Joaquín's side.

"And what do you do for work? I'm pretty sure I could tell you your own favorite color before your job," Bucky joked, you laughed knowing that Joaquín would tell someone your favorite color before your job.

"I'm a profiler at the FBI's behavioral analysis unit," you explained. "I use the behavior pattern, method of murder, and a whole other things to find serial killers. And the occasional kidnap or bioweapon attack," you gave them the longer answer to the question since most people tend to not know what the BAU is. The four of you started to walk out of the airport and to the car, Joaquín holding your bag for you.

It wasn't anything new, the looks you got when you walked with Joaquín but these one's made you smile. You were talking with the boys, getting to know them as you talked. It was fun, you noticed that Joaquín was quiet most of the time but you also knew that with the drinks he would soon be talking, a lot.

"I love you," Joaquín mumbled as he leaned into you, you glanced at him with a smile. "Sam, Bucky, have I ever told you how much I love y/n?" Joaquín looked over at the two. You laughed at the way he tried to make it subtle but with the way he was leaning on you, and his not so quiet whispering, you could hear all his words.

"All the time," Sam answered.

"What about how when she smiles it's like time stops and the world is just revolving around her?" Joaquín had moved to wrap his arm around you, but was still stage whispering.

"That one's new," Bucky said, a smile gracing his face.

"Or, or, when I was immediately drawn to her laugh at the college party. She was playing beer pong and she laughed when her friend missed," Joaquín retold the story of the first time he saw you; however, you've never heard it.

"I didn't know that," you told Joaquín who looked at you weirdly.

"You didn't?" Sam was the one to ask.

"No, if I have the right party, then we didn't meet until a few days later in a shared class. We just happened to sit next to each other the one day that the professor made us pick our partner based on who was next to us," you explained, looking down at Joaquín who was staring at you with heart eyes.

"Well, we didn't know that one either," Sam told you and you smiled and let out a little laugh. You four talked a little bit more before Joaquín started to just ramble about how much he loved you.

"I guess we should get going," you laughed after one particularly loud declaration of love from Joaquín followed by a kiss to your cheek.

➽──────────────❥

Masterlist | Requests

[spideyriki]

Hey, can you do niki (or Sunghoon) smut, in which the female dom fucks the male sub niki (or Sunghoon) giving them punishment for not obeying the female dom and making him cry. Like a really hard smut.

please please please!

pairing: sub!sunghoon x fem!reader

c. warnings: unprotected sex (nuh uh ladies), begging, spanking, cock slapping, overstimulation, dacryphillia, fingering (m receiving), subspace, aftercare

w. count: 1.9k+

a. note: i'm back!! sorry for disappearing hehe n sorry for how long overdue this was aughh i hope this reaches the anon who requested this. nyways, missed you all so much but i've been crazy busy :( hope you guys liked this, feedback is welcome <3 (p.s. i tried to make this like Hard dom but i fear i am js a big softie SIGHH)

"did you have fun being a slut, hmm?" the hard strike of your hand against sunghoon's ass cheek echos around the room, your stare stern as you talk to sunghoon.

"mommy, i wasn't being a slut!" sunghoon whines back at you, he's positioned over your lap, cute round cheeks facing up towards you.

"oh so you just flirt with other people for fun? that's what i've taught you to do?" you bark out back at him, slapping his bottom again, eliciting a whimper from sunghoon. a pretty shade of crimson blossoming on his pale skin from the contact.

your hand gently massages him slightly before another spank meets his ass. his tip continuously leaking out precum all over your lap.

"do you want those ladies to see you spread out like this too?" your hands spread his ass cheeks, as you lean down to spit on his hole which flutters at the sensation. your finger reaching down to prod at his hole slightly, smearing your spit all over his tight entrance.

"n-no only want mommy.." a small smirk makes it's way on your face, your free hand reaching to pull at his soft hair harshly, leaning his head to the side slightly so you can see his face, his red cheeks tear stained.

"mhm, that's right, sweetie. and who does your pretty little cock belong to?" you purr in his ear, the tone of your voice sickeningly sweet, almost condescending. your finger finally pushing into his tight entrance as you wait for his response.

sunghoon doesn't answer you, his brain going blank from the feeling of your finger streching him out slowly, your finger still gentle despite him being punished.

you release the hold on his hair abruptly, his head falling forward onto the mattress, as you give him another harsh spank for his lack of response.

"mommy! b-belongs to mommy!" sunghoon rushes out as more tears cascade down his cheeks, the pleasurable sting on his ass causing sunghoon to cry out loudly.

you nod down at him, the smirk on your face not faltering at the sounds sunghoon lets out. your free hand travels all across his body as the other continues to explore his hole. your thumb and pointer finger catch sunghoon's nipple between them as you pinch the nub, more beautiful sounds leaves sunghoon.

another finger made it's way into sunghoon's entrance, slowly easing into the tight warmth, his hole stretching to accommodate your long slender digits as they reach deeper to find his prostate. in less than a minute, sunghoon let out a small whine as his hips subconsciously push up against your fingers, evident that you have found his sweet spot. you smile down at the cute ministration, allowing him to do as he pleases, your fingers only merely massaging up against his prostate slightly to encourage sunghoon further.

sunghoon lets out another sweet whine at your now lack of movement, his glassy teary eyes look back up at you as he bats his lashes at you as one of his hands reach behind him to get hold of your wrist, attempting to get you to thrust your fingers into him once again.

“mommy, please?” sunghoon’s sweet voice purrs out once again.

“go on, fuck yourself on my fingers, slut.”

a small complaining huff left sunghoon as his hand on your wrist remained, moving your hand back as his hips moved. the movement from his hips and your fingers prodding deeper into his hole, continuously stimulating his prostate. more tears spilt down his flushed cheeks as his pace increased, feeling the knot in his abdomen tightening. you take notice of his full cock hanging heavily between his legs, precum dribbling down onto your lap before your gentle fingers take hold of it.

“are you going to cum soon, baby?” your sweet honeyed voice reached his ears, a spark contrast to your harsh tones earlier, edging him closer to his orgasm.

sunghoon responds with a soft, “yes, mommy.”

your hand strokes his long member in pace with his fast thrusts, his sticky cum coating your fingers, making the slide even more pleasurable for him. your pointer finger toying with his slit, swiping away his precum only for more to drip down onto your lap.

with your hand working on his cock, alongside your fingers which continuously abused his prostate, sunghoon’s orgasm was approaching quickly. you noticed the tell tale signs, with sunghoon’s heavy breathing, his mouth hung open as he whimpered and whined, and how his cock twitched often.

“i’m going to cum!” sunghoon rushed out to warn you.

you tutted at his words, “is that how you ask?”

another drawn out whine came from sunghoon, “please mommy, can i cum please?”

a grin graced your features as you hear the evident desperation in his tone. “hm, sluts don’t get to cum,” your hand sped up it’s motion on his aching member.

a pained cry left sunghoon as he held back the urge to release all over your hand. “no, no, please mommy! i can’t. i can’t-“ he cut himself off with a whimper. your smile widened as you saw big full tears cascade down sunghoon’s red cheeks as he tried his best to obey you.

“yes, you can.” your tone gentle in comparison to your actions.

sunghoon quickly shook his head, “no! can’t, please mommy, please!”

“hold it, slut.” you told sunghoon, sternly.

sunghoon’s breathes in and catches his bottom lip between his teeth as he tries his best to be a good boy for you, not wanting to push you more. his hips slowing their movement as he tries his best to lessen his urge to cum.

just as he thought he had controlled himself, unexpectedly you thrust your hand into him, adding in another finger to hit right into his sweet spot again. his hole was feeling the fullness and a hearty moan was ripped right out of him and he lost the control he had just gained.

"no, no, no!" sunghoon cried out as he spurted out his cum all over your fingers that were working on his cock, your hand stroked him all through his orgasm.

you pulled out your fingers gently, watching as his hole fluttered slightly at the loss of being full before letting go of his now limp cock too.

immediately, sunghoon shakily turned around and properly planted himself on your lap, his arms reaching out for you. you quickly opened your arms to catch his embrace as he let out small cries, his head hiding in the crook of your neck, you quickly shush his cries gently as your hands ran over the expense of his back.

"i'm sorry, mommy! please punish me."

sunghoon was always a big crier in bed but this was unexpected, you pulled him away softly from where he was latched onto you tightly and immediately took notice of his slightly clouded gaze. oh, your poor boy was in subspace.

your fingers brushed the hair out of his face, "shh it's okay, baby, mommy isn't going to punish you."

he quickly shook his head at your response, "no! i want you to punish me, please? i was a bad boy, mommy."

you let out a sigh because, how could you say punish him now with how cute he was? with one last look at sunghoon to make sure he was sure of it, you guided him to lie down.

sunghoon's member, though sensitive from his previous orgasm, still red and erect, rested heavily against his abdomen, looking for attention once again at the thought of a punishment. a hard strike from your hand came in contact with his aching cock which bobbed at the impact, eliciting a moan from sunghoon.

"are you such a dumb fucking slut, huh? you can't control yourself," another slap to his member. your hand reached to fondle with his heavy balls. sunghoon's little whimper sent a wave of arousal straight down to your already wet core.

you quickly pull off your now soaked panties, sunghoon's eyes trained on your movements, pupils dilating as he takes in your wetness causing his dick to twitch.

"you're such a pathetic slut, i don't even know if you deserve mommy's pussy," at that, a whine was rushed out of sunghoon as he fumbled over his words, but he was too deep into subspace to form proper sentences.

"aww, mommy's dumb little slut can't speak either," you move to straddle sunghoon, taking hold of his erection you run it over your pussy, the head catching slightly into your hole before sliding it up back to toy with your clit, mixing both your juices together.

getting too impatient yourself, your tight pussy finally sinks down onto his cock. the prominent veins rubbing up against your sticky walls. you head falls back slightly, as you both let out moans as you start bouncing on him.

sunghoon was so big and filled up your tight hole so well, your hands balanced themselves perfectly on his toned chest as you quicken your pace.

sunghoon's head lolled back as your warm walls enveloped every inch of his member, his pretty eyes fluttering close every so often as all he could do was let out pitiful moans.

you reached for his hand, resting it on the prominent bulge on your stomach as you moved on him, the sight was driving him closer to his release, however, as he was still so lost in ecstasy he could only mumble out a small plea.

"cum whenever you want, slut," immediately after, you could feel his warm cum filling up every inch of your insides until it was spilling out of your pussy, riding him through his orgasm. however, your movements never halted.

sunghoon let out another cry as you continued to move on spent out member.

"m-mommy hurts," sunghoon whimpered.

"good."

your pace only sped up from there as he cried out to you, his hand reaching for yours to interlock with. your own release was fast approaching as sunghoon's tears only fueled it further.

your pussy clenched around sunghoon's cock tightly as you let out a moan, you finally reached your high, cum spilling out of you and coating his thick cock, unexpectedly a heavy gush of liquid spurted out of your hole too. both you and sunghoon were surprised when you squirted all over sunghoon.

how beautiful you looked and the way you squirted was too much for sunghoon, he came for a third time, your pussy milking him dry as he shot his seed deep into you. sunghoon cried out from the sensitivity of his cock, his hand reaching up for you to stop.

understanding what he needs, you pulled off of him gently. as you were getting up to reach for a towel beside your bed to clean him and the mess between your legs up, you could hear a small whimper from him.

"shh, it's okay, baby. i'll be right back,"

it wasn't often that sunghoon got into subspace but when he did it was the absolute cutest thing ever, but you had to be careful he didn't go through subdrop.

as you got the towel, you came back to the bed to see sunghoon's wide eyes searching for yours, waiting for you to come back. quickly, you cleaned the both of you up before getting into bed with him, sunghoon immediately cuddling up into you.

your hands stroked his sweaty hair back gently before placing a kiss on his forehead (and another on his lips, to his demand).

as his eyes drooped about to fall asleep, he whispered out, "i i love you, mommy."

©spideyriki 🍉

[returnofeternity]

synopsis. taking care of natalie after she kills ben.

pairing: natalie scatorccio x gn!reader

genre: angst, comfort, fluff

warnings. mentions of death and blood

wc: 951

· · 𖦹 · ·

you could only hold off misty for so long.

natalie was in there for hours staring at what she had done. ben's sickly face finally looks at peace though, and it eases her anguished heart just slightly.

you could hear her quiet, wheezed sobs for hours, and you weren't ready to see her come out of his shelter, barely able to keep herself upright as she stumbled past the gate. your heart sinks when she rubs his blood on her cheek. all you wanna do is pull her into a hug but misty's sudden yell makes fear coarse through your entire body.

this isn't gonna end well. it was never gonna end well for natalie, but now there's gonna be a huge scene.

"what did you do?!" misty screams at nat, looking at her with the utmost disdain. she pushes your hand away roughly when you try to calm her down.

"misty," you call out her name, trying to get her attention away from nat. it doesn't work. not even when you grab her shoulders to try and turn her to face you. the word "murderer" flies from her mouth and you look toward nat, her face covered in snot and ben's blood.

no, she was doing the right thing.

"it was the right thing to do." nat says shakily, swallowing down her snot. "i'm sorry, but it's true. he was suffering."

you walk up to the group and stand protectively next to nat, glaring at shauna who looks at her with malice. she's acting like she wasn't the first to suggest killing him in the first place. it makes you angry. what makes you even angrier is her barking chihuahua behind her who shouts at nat.

"shut the fuck up." melissa utters.

your arm gets brushed by nat's as gen pushes her from behind, muttering the same words as melissa. as you watch nat fall to her hands and knees, your fight-or-flight response kicks in, and it's fight that wins when it seems like everyone is ganging up on her, starting with van who chastises her. you shout and shove gen back, telling her that if she ever lays a hand on your girlfriend again, she won't have any hands soon.

the chatter in the background as shauna rants to the girls means nothing to you as you kneel next to nat and grab her, helping her sit up on her knees as you brush her hair back.

"are you okay?" you whisper, wiping snot off her lips and attempting to wipe the smudges of blood on her cheek.

she gives you a half-nod, realizing that actually, no, she's not okay.

you tune back into the conversation at the worst time.

"natalie will prepare the feast." shauna says smugly.

· · 𖦹 · ·

nat's not even gripping onto your hand as you lead her back to her hut. she's looking past you when you turn back to glance at her, needing to make sure she's even there in the first place because it sure doesn't feel like it.

you set her down gently on the seat, looking into her eyes and trying to get her to look at you. it only works when you grip her chin, mumbling her name softly as you make her look up.

"nat? natalie?" you mumble, your thumb rubbing gentle circles on her chin. you give her a sad smile when she finally looks at you, hand leaving her chin to rest on her knee, squeezing comfortingly. "i'm gonna clean you up, okay?"

she nods stiffly and wipes at her bloody cheek, lips opening in a heavy sigh. you scratch the side of her head and get up, telling her you'll be back in a minute. your stomach twists when you bump into gen on the way out, glaring harshly at her before you walk to the spot where the water buckets are. you collect one and bring it back to the hut, setting it down next to nat and searching for a rag.

"do you want me to help you?" you dip the rag in the bucket, squeezing some of the water out before dragging it along her cheek. "with...ben."

you're not sure you could do it if you wanted to, even for nat. saying it is one thing, but actually cutting him up? you used to help shauna with some of the animals back at the cabin during the first spring, but that was just cutting up the meat, not actually bleeding them out.

nat's eyes flutter shut as you clean up her cheek, pressing it lightly against your hand as she shakes her head. "no, i can do it. not like shauna'll let you help anyway. it's a punishment."

you hum sadly and twist the blood out of the rag over the bucket before dipping it in again. you wash over her cheek once again before moving to her nose and lips, making sure all the snot and dirt get scrubbed off it.

"thank you." she speaks up. "for looking out all night. misty would've caught me and killed me herself if you weren't out there." both of you laugh lightly, and she grabs your hand with the rag in it and takes it from you to set it to the side. "i love you."

nat looks down as she plays with your fingers mindlessly, her body still trembling from a few hours ago. you bring your hand back to caress her cheek, nat fully melting into it now as she kisses your thumb.

"i love you too." you reply, cupping her other cheek and kissing her. "should probably start getting ready for the feast. let me help you get ready..."